#big feelings for fictional characters that won't show up again after this one moment

[ciel-em]

One of the worst (positive) things to read in batfam fanfics is when there's a mission where they're saving civilians who've been hurt for a long time. And one of them sees the bat member(s) and shouts some variation of "I told you they would come save us!"

This always brings tears to my eyes, especially when they're children. They needed saving and they're here now, but damnit if it feels like it wasn't soon enough. 'I'm sorry they didn't come sooner' or 'I'm sorry they only knew to save you because they needed a cover' runs through my head. But I know our little heroes feel the same way and then it hurts more.

*through sobs* I need more of this

[the-fiction-witch]

Feelings

Media The Queens Gambit

Character Benny Watts

Couple Benny X Reader

Rating Sweet + SMut

Requested:

Hey fiction witch, if u can see this I have a request, in the show Beth leaves New York and goes back to her house and when Beth and Benny r on the phone Benny gets upset and tells Beth to not call him, after that happens can u plz make y/n find out that Beth hurt Benny and y/n being her sweet and empathetic self, goes to comfort Benny in his house and yk wtv happens next 🤭 if u can make that story asap that would be amazing thank u 🙏

I shifted my hips from side to side humming along with the tune coming from my record player speaker, My hands in the hot water washing up the dishes and pots from dinner. I jumped as I heard my phone begin its blaring. So I left the last pot to soak trying off my hands on my apron as I scampered my shoes across the floor of my little townhouse I quickly turned down the volume on my record player as I passed the shelf, I lost my footing a little on the rug's stupid curled corner and went tumbling onto my sofa on my back, luckily just beside my phone table so I picked up the red rotary phone from the table bringing it to my ear. 

"Y/l/n Residence." I smiled 

"Hi y/n" Beth smiled 

"Ohh, My my to what do I owe the pleasure, Miss Harmon?" 

"Oh you know, nothing unusual. How's queens?" 

"Boring. But finally unpacked my last few boxes so shaping up nicely. How's kentuky?" 

"Much the same" she smiled "So, I had a question."

"ahh there is the point of your call, of course, ask away"

"You've been to Moscow correct?" 

"Yes, I have. I assume there is a follow-up question."

"Yeah, I'm doing a bit of packing. I know everyone says Moscow is cold but... exactly how cold?"

 "When they say cold they mean cold beth. It's freezing in Moscow. The snow came up to my knees. I was so cold I ripped stuffing out of the hotel pillow to shove in my bra because I was convinced my nipples would freeze off. and that's coming from a New York girl" I laughed "Pack for ice. Pack for snow. Pack for seeing your breath inside buildings." 

"Really?"

"If you're too hot you can always take layers off," I explained 

"Fair enough,"

"That all?"

"I had something else to ask too"

"Sure, fire away." 

"Did you... Like to fuck Benny?"

"That's a bold question for six pm" 

"But did you, when you two were... together?"

I laughed "My darling Elizabeth. Me and Benny never have been... together. Not officially anyway."

"But when you did. Did you like to?"

"Sometimes."

"Sometimes?"

"You can say every time you've had sex you liked it? sometimes stuff's just shit"

"But other than those times"

"I did. Course I did. Benny... is a complicated man"

"How so?"

"Because he's Benny" I laugh "He's weird, he thinks fifteen steps ahead at any one moment, he's passionate and dedicated with an ego big enough to fly himself to Moscow and back, but he's also... you know a man. so he's blunt and simple, and can't see a hint five inches in front of his face." I explained, "Why?" 

"I think. it might be over."

"Over? Did it ever begin?"

"I mean... kinda. sort of. It's complicated."

"Beth. What happened?"

"So you know how Benny's been bugging me to come to New York"

"Yes. Because he misses you. That's his way of saying that." 

"Yeah he even told me"

"He told you he missed you?"

"Yes"

"And you did what?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing!"

"Yeah I mean we called a little more but not much else. and I kinda... pissed him off"

"What did you do?"

"I gave the church the money back. I tried to ask him for money. if he wants to come he can help me pay for it right? he flipped out and told me not to call him again. That was... two days ago and he won't answer the phone. Guess I'm just kinda..."

"You're serious?" I sighed 

"Yeah."

"Okay... I have not got time to deal with you" I sighed sitting up normally "All I'm gonna say is you've fucked up Beth. And I am going to clean this up, not because I want to help you. But because I care too much about Benny. I will call you later and we will have a chat" I told her before hanging up the phone 

"Fuck..." I sighed "Harmon, you do make my life difficult" I grabbed the phone again and dialled the number for the Brooklyn basement listening to it ring but no answer, I tried again but still no answer, I gave it one more try but still no answer. 

I gave up setting the phone back on the receiver and I got to my feet untieing my apron throwing it on the kitchen table grabbing my handbag making sure to grab my spare key. changing my shoes and slipping on my gloves before rushing out locking up my front door as I scampered down the steps of the stoop I unlocked the door on my little red mini threw my bag on the passenger seat quickly started the car up and scampered through the New York streets using all the little cut thoughts I knew to travel the six miles from my townhouse in queens to the basement in Brooklyn. I pulled my mini up behind the little blue Beatle parked and grabbed my bag climbing out of the car and heading down the little foul-smelling stairwells until I finally reached the metal door giving it a firm few taps. No answer came. but I could hear noises from within. I knocked much louder but still no answer came.

I rolled my eyes grabbed the spare key from my handbag forced it into the lock and opened the door shutting it behind me immediately I could tell things weren't good.

This apartment was dark, gloomy and damp as usual, bottles littered his table enough you could use them as pieces in a chess game, and things haphazardly moved around the apartment. And Benny amongst it all. Barefoot. Black jeans tight to his body, his belt gone, his black turtleneck on with his sleeves rolled up, frustration across his face, a beer in hand that he finished and there across his apartment smashing it on the wall. 

“Benny?” 

He ran a hand through his hair and glanced up at me “Hey y/n.”

“How are you feeling?” 

“I'm fine” he snapped grabbing a cigarette from his table setting it in his mouth and lighting it up with his old Zippo 

“Benny.” I glared

“I'm fine.” He snapped 

“Beth called me.”

“Did she now? You come down to tell me I'm an asshole”

“I don't make judgements till I hear both sides” I answered “So, tell me what happened.”

“So it fucking -”

“Calmly.” 

“It's over. I'm done with her. I have put up with so much shit from her. She treats me like a doormat, and only calls me when she needs something. Well she can go fuck herself” he says pacing around his apartment

“Okay, what exactly happened?”

“She gave the money back. Asked me to pay for us. She ignored everything I told her. All because she didn't want to sign some worthless bit of paper. Now I can't go to Moscow with her. Fine, she clearly didn't want me with her anyway.”

“Alright, and you told her?”

“I told her not to call me again. She wants to do this on her own fine. She can. She won't hear a word from me, but she can fuck off if she wants anything.” 

“You've been ignoring calls?”

“I didn't exactly feel like talking right now” 

“Alright, go get changed and I'll make you some tea”

“I don't -”

“Benny. Don't make me bonk you with a spoon” 

“Fine I will get changed” he sighed going to his room “and make coffee.”

“No tea. Coffee will keep you up and you do not need more energy right now” I explained going and making some nice tea one for me and one for Benny taking and sitting them both on the small table in the centre of the living space, as well as a glass of water I took a small dustpan and brush from the cabinet and cleaned up the broken glass from the bottle as well as any other little mess that littered the apartment. I went to the small record player beside the chair and for a moment flipped through his small collection grabbing a nice album of some gentle swing music adding it to the player letting it spin and turning it down to almost nothing, and I took a seat on the pile of pillows he used as a sofa. Soon enough he returned with a fresh set of clothes, some new jeans, a black T-shirt and his green button-down 

“There you feel a little better now?”

“It is nice to have some fresh clothes on” he grunted back 

“Come on” I offered patting the pillow beside me

“I'm not in the mood y/n”

“Benny. Come here.”

He rolled his eyes but came and sat beside me still as angry and frustrated as before leaning his head against the exposed bricks 

“Good, now when did you last drink something?”

“I'm not thirsty”

“Did I ask that?”

“No”

“When did you last drink something? You're only going to give yourself a headache” I told him, offering him the water but he turned away “Hydrate. Or I will hit you with a spoon”

He took the glass and had a sizable sip 

“Thank you, now come here and talk it out” 

“Y/n I know you mean well but I’m-”

“I will get the spoon in a minute.” I warn “Come” I demanded patting my thigh

He rolled his eyes but leant over so I wrapped my arms around him letting him lay his head in my lap “I don't see how this is going to help”

“You need to acknowledge and work through your feelings”

“I don't have feelings. I'm a man.”

“Ohh no you don't have feelings. That's why you've been spending your days in a dark basement drinking like a fish and frustrated smoking. No feelings at all” I smiled gently petting his soft fluffy hair 

“I don't need to work through my feelings.”

“Yes, you do. Otherwise, you're just going to be angry forever. And god knows I can't deal with that” I laughed

“Fine” he sighed 

“Take a moment just to clear the brain” I smiled playing with his hair in all the usual spots he liked me too

“My brain doesn’t clear.”

“Then hyperfocus. On the ticking of the clock, the nice gentle music, clear the mind of all other things and just exist for a moment”

We sat for a few moments just enjoying the quiet of his basement, the gentle hum of the music and the rhythm of our breaths

“Okay” He nods sounding far calmer than before

“That help?”

“A little”

“Okay do a Big breath in.”

“Why do I-”

“Benny” I warned so he did as I asked “Big breath in. And back out. Another one in… and another out. Okay? Feel a little better?” I smiled walking him through it a few times

“A bit” 

“Are you calmer?”

“Somewhat”

“So, tell me what happened”

“You going to tell me when I’m wrong?”

“No. I'm not going to say anything you just explain and I will listen.” 

“I try asking her for months to come up to New York, actually spend some time together, no she's busy she needs to do this, she needs to do that, she ghosts me for six months, okay I try asking to go to Paris with her support her with the tournament, no she's going on her own, she can't afford to take me too, so fine she goes on her own only when she's fucked herself up so bad she looses her tournament and has headlines everywhere she was drunk as a sailor then! I got a call. I try to be supportive and offer to pick her up from the airport. No, she wants to be alone. I try to talk her through everything and offer her a safe space, so we can be together and work stuff out, no she wants to be alone. She wants to drink. Fine, I try! I try and say she can drink so long as she came here no she wants to go and get drunk. She goes home to Kentucky and ghosts me again. She calls me finally because she wants my advice and again I try to get her to come here, I try and be nice hell I told her I fucking missed her nope she wants to stay on her own meaning she wants to fucking drink. And again I'm ghosted. She completely ignores what I tell her to do. She gives the church their money and calls me up like I'm the problem! Like I haven't spent the last year waiting for your phone calls like some abandoned puppy! Says she's paying her own way to Moscow and can't afford to take me with her, if I wanna come I need to pay, when she knows full well I don't have two thousand dollars laying around to jet off to Moscow. Accused me of gambling it all away. So fuck it. Fuck her. She wants to go and her drunk and fuck her life up that's her decision she's not taking me down with her. I'm not staying as her fucking doormat fuck to treat her how she wants. If she'd rather get drunk than be with me fine I hope she and her bottle are happy” 

“How did that make you feel?”

“Like shit.”

“Benny, feelings are not shit. use your words. Not just your swears.”

“Like… why should I bother you know? Like I'm trying so so much and you're giving absolutely nothing back. And that makes me feel like I'm the asshole for wanting anything”

“You're not an asshole for wanting acknowledgement Benny. You've done a lot for Beth and it's not easy for you to be emotionally numerable”

“Exactly! It's like you bare your fucking soul to someone and their response is okay cool. What else? Like I don't know what more you want from me. Am I being a dick? Asking for too much or something?”

“I don't think so, I do think you also need to respect Beth is also not an emotional person. The two of you aren't going to have a great emotional conversation because neither of you are good emotional communicators and that's fine some people aren't, but it would seem you are putting a lot of effort in, now Beth may not see it as a lot of effort in her mind and may not be seeing how much effort that Is for you and not appreciate it as much or it could be that she just expects more. and if you can't give her that then you can't there's nothing wrong with that Benny” 

“Do you think I'm an emotionally distant person?”

“You can be. You're… very practical Benny. You're emotional to the extent of practically, when emotions aren't useful you don't bother to express them. But I do think you not in the wrong here you've made a lot of moves to be more outwardly expressive and it was clear you were upset long before this” I explained “I think, and of course, you don't need to take my advice. But I think you and Beth need time apart I think you both need to not see one another, not speak to one another, for a couple of weeks I think you both need to separately decide the kind of relationship you want together. If you want to have the kind of relationship where you call every other day and talk or if you want a relationship where you talk every six months how much emotional investment you each have needs to be equal and it clearly isn't so I think spend time apart to think and when she gets back from Moscow you two need to talk and see where you go from here.”

“... Your right.” He sighed sitting up “Where did you learn all this stuff anyway?” He asks having some tea 

“Therapy. You know that thing I keep telling you to go to”

“I don't need therapy”

“Everyone needs therapy, Benny.”

“I don’t” 

“Yes, you do.” I told him “You have a lot of untapped emotional issues rattling around in that big head of yours” I told him having some tea “And I’m boarder line convinced you have… some type of-”

“No I don’t” he snapped

“Benny you hyperfocus on chess, don’t understand your own emotions, freak out when someone tries to touch your skin, and use your rings like fidget toys… and you don’t think there might be a possibility you could have some form of -”

“No.” 

“Fine, fine. I’m not going to argue with you” I giggled “You should go to therapy though Benny.”

“Ohh what because I have ‘emotional trauma’?”

“Yes. you do.” I told him “Even if it's just having someone to talk to, to rant about your problems”

“That's why I have you” 

“I'm not your therapist Benny”

“Sorry”

“It's fine” I smiled pressing a kiss to the top of his head “You really liked her didn't you?”

“I did. I kinda thought we were the same. Maybe we're too much alike”

“Do you think maybe… you're seeing the bad things in Beth that you see in yourself?”

“Kinda. I think it's … made me realize how bad it is to be on that side of it. To be the one waiting by the phone on the promise of a call that never comes. I think I'm .. trying though. I can see how bad it is and in trying to fix it but just feels like bailing a bucket out a lake” 

“Well, baby steps. Just the fact you see it and are making steps is still better. You're never going to bail the lake if you don't start with a bucket”

“I guess so. It makes me wonder… how she sees me. I know officially we didn't label anything but, I kinda think she just saw me as a chessboard that could make her cum” 

“What did you want her to be?”

“....I don't know. Guess I wanted someone to call. Someone to spend time with. Someone who wants to talk to me. Listens to me. Makes me feel like what I say makes a difference. Like I Matter to them. Someone who gets excited about spending time with me, who wants to be with me not because we might play chess or we might have sex but just because we like being together”

“You ever tell her that?”

“No.”

“Then … you can't expect her to give you that Benny. She's not a mind reader. She doesn't know that's what you want same as you don't know what she wants. You two are both people not great at emotions be the best course is to straight forward sit her down and say that's what you want and if that's not what she wants you can either try to find a middle ground or that can be it”

“Your right. But I don't want to see her. Or talk to her. I don't completely want to think about her but there's no getting out of that” he explained lighting another cigarette “But I'm done. Unless she's willing to try I don't want anything more than to be her friend”

“If that's what you want. That's what you want” I smiled taking the cigarette from him putting it out in the table’s ashtray “You’re not smoking because you want it you smoking because your frustrated.” I laughed

“Your therapist tell you that too?”

“No. I just know you, Benny. Besides you’ve been doing really good. Don’t destroy all your progress just because you’re mad” I told him 

“You rather I drink?”

“I’d rather you have healthy coping mechanisms but you know… baby steps.” I smiled “You feel a bit better? Got all that off your chest?”

“Yeah. Thanks y/n.”

“Your welcome” I smirked having some tea “It's kinda funny”

“What is?”

“That's exactly what I wanted. Back when we …”

“Really?” He asks 

“Yeah. I'd have killed for you to want to spend time with me without it seeming like I was dragging you away from something you wanted to do more”

“.... Fuck. I was a dick.”

“You kinda were.” I laughed “But we wanted different things that's okay”

“I feel like shit. Maybe things would be different if I figured out this is what I wanted”

“Maybe” I shrug “But you didn’t want that then that’s fine you can change your mind as life changes, that wasn’t the sort of thing you wanted then”

“You’re a very emotional person. I think I struggled with that”

“I can be… overly emotional. In working on it. Trying not to overthink everything so much.” I said “How do you think it felt for me sitting here miles deep in overthinking as to why you weren’t talking to me, that you were mad, that I did something wrong, all the while you just sat there playing chess completely unaware I was even upset being quiet because… you like to sit quietly.”

“I saw you were upset… when it was too late. By the time I picked up on it you crying so far down an emotional rabbit hole even if I did know How to deal with it, it was kinda too late”

“And yes that is on you for not noticing my emotions but also on me for not being clearer with them, literally could have fixed all my overthinking with, Benny are you mad at me? But no I wanted to sit there pouting getting more and more anxious waiting for you to figure out that I was worried.” 

“I always felt like a dick for asking you what was wrong,”

“Because I wanted you to pick up on it. I didn’t want to tell you I just wanted you to pick up and fix it. And that's on me. That was my issue and I’m getting better. Can’t expect people to know everything. But you're getting better too, learning when people are upset being more outwardly emotional if you need a little coaxing.”

“Or threatening” 

“Everyone is different Benny. The sooner you realize that the easier life is. Everyone you speak to, and everyone you see is completely different we all think differently, behave differently, and have different responses to things, and no one can read minds. We all need to give each other a little more slack because we don't know what's going on in their head and they'll never know what's happening in ours. Some people can read emotions across your face like a book, some people need to be told or they'll never learn. I was an emotionally overthinking young woman craving emotional intimacy without having to ask for it. While being in a non-official relationship with a man who can't read emotions, has a hard time expressing his feelings and craves reassurance. On top of the very basic one, what's to fuck one wants to love problem. You surprised it went south?” 

“I crave reassurance?”

“Benny. You're a chess player who dresses like a goth pirate.”

“Point taken” 

“It's fine people grow and change neither of us are the people we were then”

“That's true” he nods “Can I get the number for your therapist?”

“Why?”

“He sounds good. The fact you rattled all that off is pretty impressive”

“Find your own therapist. Don't want conflicts of interest”

For a moment he was puzzled “You talk about me in therapy?”

“Yeah”

“God was I that much of a cunt?”

“No. You’re my friend. Our lives are very intertwined is all” I laughed leaning on his shoulder 

“that’s fair” he laughed “... Do you think I ask for too much? With Beth?”

“I think… you ask for more than she's comfortable with. Let's face it Benny your fighting against an addiction. You might have an ego and you might love chess but you're not physically addicted to it” 

“I just feel like in trying so hard, pushing myself so far beyond what I'd normally be comfortable with the least she can do is try”

“if that's how you feel. Then I think she should respond to that”

“I'm not a dick?”

“I don't think so” I smiled

“Thanks y/n. I'm really thankful you came over”

“Well I can't just leave you someone has to try and get you through these gross… feelings you're not used to”

“Can you stay?”

“What?”

“Can you stay? I don't think I wanna be on my own tonight”

“Of course Benny”

We stayed up a little long chatting about things but soon it came time for bed he put up the air bed for himself and I took his bed even if I argued but he let me have it. 

I changed borrowing one of his shirts for the night getting cosy in the warm bed. 

The lights out the only sound the occasional sound of the New York cars above the basement. 

I was about to drift off when I perked up hearing the creek of the door and soon enough the covers moved and Benny crawled in with me 

“Hi”

“Hi”

“Did you want your own bed back?”

“No, I just… I don't wanna be alone right now” he says slowly wrapping his arms around me and pulling me tight to his body my hips to his my back to his chest squeezing me almost like I was his teddy bear 

“Okay Benny, you don't need to worry I'll be right here,” I reassured letting him squeeze me tightly to his body, he held me tight pressing his lips to my shoulder 

“Can I get my anger out?” He asked 

“Alright” I nodded 

He moved and pushed me down on my back “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure,” I nodded 

He nodded and leant down to nibble and kiss my neck, before he pulled down his boxers and tugged off my panties, he started off gently slipping himself inside me he held my hips firmly digging his nails into my skin as he aggressively thrusted, often bitting his lips and gritting his teeth letting out his frustration and anger though the movement of his hips. He began to slow so I smiled and held his hips gently turning us so he laid on his back and I sat on top of him gently moving my hips slowly “Reveling in your anger is not going to make you feel better” I smiled stroking his stomach as I moved 

“I know. I just wanted to get the anger out” he sighed moving his hips with me 

“Wouldn’t this be nicer?”

“It is much nicer.” he smiled “Nice and calming” He cooed sitting up a little and wrapping his arms around me to pull me into his chest for an intense kiss I smiled into the kiss as I moved my hips faster trying to match his own speed getting more and more intense the longer it went on I knew I was close starting to nibble on his neck as I began to slow getting close to my edge he noticed and smirked making sure to work as hard as he could letting out the last of his frustration until I reached my peak biting his neck as I did which in turn got him to his own edge burying himself deep inside me and riding it out before he collapsed against the bed and I basically fell off onto the other side 

“Feel better now Benny?”

“Yeah” he nods between gasps “That is way better than therapy” 

“They're not mutually exclusive Benny.”

“I still think this is better”

“You can’t just ignore your feelings and deal with your frustrations through sex” I told him

He smirked and turned over to spoon me “Did it work?” 

“...yes but?”

“Did it work?”

“Yes.”

“Then I'm gonna do it” he shrugs 

“Alright Benny, if that’s how you wanna deal with your feelings” I laughed “Come on, let's get some sleep”

“Alright, Night”

“Night” I smiled giving him a little kiss before we cuddled up and drifted off to sleep. 

I yawned as I woke up I gently pushed Benny’s arms off me climbed out the bed and headed across the apartment, I went to the kitchen and began to make coffee humming to myself a little. 

“Morning,” Benny spoke up from the bedroom door

“Morning, How are you feeling today?”

“Better. Much better” he smiled coming and wrapping his arms around me giving my neck some kisses “You always make me feel better”

“I do?”

“You do. I’m sorry”

“For what?”

“For being a dick, when we…” he began “I realize it and I’m sorry”

“That's very sweet. Apology accepted. I’m sorry for how I was too”

“Apology accepted” he smiled 

“I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with the shit from Beth”

“It’s fine. I know how to deal with it”

“Oh?”

“She can find another doormat. She wants to drink and wants to go on her own she can. I don’t want that. We can be friends if she wants but nothing more than that. I don’t feel like I want anything more”

“Okay. I’m proud of you, for expressing your feelings” I smiled

“Did you wanna stay for a while? Spend some time together?”

“Is that also part of you dealing with this?” I giggled turning to face him

“Kinda. But Now I know what you wanted. And I want that too. Maybe now we're a little older we’ll be better, more communicative, better with our feelings. So? Did you wanna try again?”

“On one condition.”

“Oh?”

“Go to therapy, Benny.” 

“Do I have to?”

“Yes.”

“How much therapy?”

“How about one session, one date.”

“Three dates one session”

“Two.” “Deal” he smiled pulling me into a sweet kiss “Will you help me find one?”

“Yes, I will.” I giggled “Come on we’ll have coffee and a cuddle”

“Sounds perfect” 

[mundaneandmagicalcreature]

The Newsreader & gender expectations. Part II: Dale Jennings and being a newsreader

I feel like there's a line connecting Dale's mum with his career ambitions and with how he feels about his sexuality.

Dale's not that young. So, why hasn't reflected more about his sexuality and his relationships? Why is he still trying to erase parts of himself (darling, it won't work)? Why does he assume that everyone wants to get married?

"It's 1987, there was not really the language for him to discover that (and he's working in such a rigid environment), to even really understand what bisexuality is or what pansexuality is or maybe demisexual (sic)." Sam Reid. ABC Radio National

Both Sam and Michael have talked about Dale lacking the language about his sexuality. While it's true that that he may not have come across the word "bisexual" (although the famous Bowie interview is from 1979), I feel like more than a label he needs a narrative. It's pretty common for queer people, when we're discovering our sexuality to look for people like us: historical figures, fictional characters, people in our own life, etc. Just some one to show us how to live.

Gerry also doesn't have a label, and yet he seems much more happy and comfortable in his sexuality. His life history could be that narrative Dale needs: fall in love with a woman, marry, have a child, have a successful career AND have sex with men on the side. But Dale is set on monogamy. Which is absolutely fine, but he can't imagine himself as attracted to both men and women, and monogamous, AND happy.

My theory is that he's never had the time to think about this things because he was an emotionally parentified child. We know that Dale's father died when he was only 15. He had to take responsibility for his mum happiness. And he's holding that responsibility ever since.

This is more fanfiction than analysis territory, but I can imagine a recently widowed Val glued to the TV, watching news. And I can imagine a very young Dale thinking "Now that my dad's dead I have to be a proper man, the kind of man my mum values. And that man is a newsreader."

"I suppose Dale has always sort of believe that the pinnacle of... everything that represents stability and assuredness and the kind of like archetype of what it is to be a man and what it is to be a voice of authority is represented in this newsreader kind of form." Sam Reid. The Newsreader Podcast. 06 | Fireworks with Sam Reid and Michael Lucas

I know that sexuality is not correlated to gender, but these things intersect and the ideal man for society (specially in this moment in time) is a straight man (who gets married to a woman, has children, provides for them financially, etc). Queer men are seeing as feminine and therefore faulty. Dale's running away from being perceived that way.

What I would call "a partner" and Adam calls "a lover", Val calls "a friend". The euphemism makes it pretty clear that she's not comfortable with queerness. Dale wants to make her happy, so he has to be a straight man.

Even after more than a year of Helen and Dale being together, Val says she wasn't sure Dale was going to propose/marry her. Maybe she thought they were going to break up, or that they would continue to "live in sin" (lets note the religious expression for a moment...) for ever. But what I hear (and judging by Dale's awkward reaction, he may be thinking the same) is "up until this moment I was afraid you were actually gay".

By the end of the season, Dale and Helen have broken up. He buys his own house and while he's showing it to his mum, they have that little dialogue. "It's not a family home", once again that idea of nuclear family shows up. For the first time he's going against her wishes. Does this mean he's happy? Sam doesn't think so and neither do I. I think he just switched his mum's expectations for those of the society in general. And society expect for people who work on TV to have big fancy houses, so that's what he bought.

________

(part I)

feel free to comment in whatever form you like, I'm nosy and I like to read what other people think.

[trashogram]

Hello again! I'm the anon from this post:

https://www.tumblr.com/trashogram/752219554179153920/referring-to-your-post-three-hours-ago-about?source=share

I have returned! Being summoned by Viv proving my point last time by making even more merch! (seriously though- you should NOT put that kind of stuff on offical merch, even as a little 'funny haha' moment. suicide isn't a joke to be profited off of.)

Anywho- I have seen the newest episode (a friend likes to laugh at it and I like to psychoanalyze fictional characters) and it's great to see feminine characters being built properly, but (as another person said earlier) it took a good majority of the fandom bullying Viv to finally get it canonically done. And yet? It still felt half assed.

By half-assed I mean it in the sense of: "Oh cool, this character has a deeper level to them! Great! Are we gonna see more of that?" "Nah." "Oh. Well...okay...?"

Because of how Viv does things with Helluva, it's almost a for sure thing that we will never see Verosika actually get built properly- only having her show up whenever it's convenient for plot. Which is understandable, balancing a full character cast is hard- but it sucks, because she's an important character that's tied to the past of one of the main characters. What makes me so sure about it is that Viv does the same thing for our main cast too!

A good example of what I mean is:

The episode that was supposed to be Millie centered. We have NEVER touched on her need for validation before or even after that episode. So- based from what we've seen so far, it's HIGHLY likely we won't ever see the Verosika layers ever again.

Another example is Loona's episode, where she goes to a party with Vortex and meets Bee. We get a tiny glimpse into her true character, but then it's never touched on again.

Pardon my rambles, but I shall return at some point- this space feels safe to talk about this kinda stuff. Might as well tag myself as the 💫 anon (if permitted and not taken, of course). ^^

Hello again 💫! Thanks for feeling comfy enough to talk w me! No judgement here, I love hearing other people’s thoughts!

The merch is nasty. And the hypocrisy that will ensue from a fandom that supposedly prioritizes mental health and abuse victims over it will be just as shamelessly awful. If anyone else released *that* shirt for purchase, it would get them cancelled/boycotted/whatever.

You know, this actually makes me laugh a bit because you’re correct that Verosika should get more time to show her character ESPECIALLY when HB has done this with another pivotal character from Blitzø’s past — Fizarolli. Your ask just makes the blatant favoritism even more apparent because we legit went off the rails of IMP and even Stolitz a bit for the sake of getting into Fizz’s psyche for a couple episodes and his relationship with Asmodeus as well as his abusive relationship with Mammon but I highly, highly doubt Vivzie would do the same for Verosika when she can’t even do it for Millie or Loona who are part of the main cast.

Someone else pointed out that her development is also still centered on Blitzø in a big way and I’m sure. I can’t pretend I’m not aware that Verosika showing layers and possibly forgiving Blitzø is for his sake or for the sake of Stolitz. It’s very apparent and very disappointing.

[kichimiangra]

You mentioned that you might hypothetically write a story for Digimon Ghost Game. What would be the plot of that potential fanfic?

I mean, I probably won't actually write it because me and writing don't always get along.... it's why I have more art than text for Nannersverse at this point. I'm just trying to force myself to write more for the sake of being able to shit out scripts for comics quicker. Nannersverse would have totally ended up a comic if I didn't stop myself! Then it would take so long that it would eventually get set on the backburner as another unfinished comic :<

BUT!

If I did do a Ghost Game fic it would probably be an attempt at a fictional "Season 2" where I collect all the loose ends or things I personally would want to see expanded on, so the main main plot would be a whole "Gulus can't count, the endbringer is coming and it's only been 2 years" but opening with a few episodic chapters that feel like episodes to establish how the world is now that Digimon are kinda an open thing and not a secret, how people reac to their existance. and what the GG Gangs normal lives have been since then. Maybe Jellymon and Angoramon have hit that point in their development by now that they no longer default to Rookie form, but are permanently Champions to show that even if it's only been 2 years the relationship to their humans have had a substantial effect on their growth? But more importantly because I'm bias as fuck, the early chapter highlights would be on specifically how Hiro and Gammamon's lives are effected by the constant existence of Big brother Gulus popping up unannounced for almost anything, going from who was originally a background character in their lives to a constant element needing getting used to, such as watching Gammamon seemingly hold a two way conversation with himself with only the black eyes being an indicator he isn't going full Gollum. Plus the fun that they are trying to get Gulus to be good but he is VERY resistant to behaving good.

"The Plot" would eventually show up and the episodic chapters would end to focus instead on a serialized narrative of trying to put an end to the end bringer, maybe it kills or captures Quantumon? It wouldn't be a fast arrival, Maybe the Gulus Virus that had been going around the digital world was technically caused by the end bringer (So like, back on Krypton Gulus was just a normal Gammamon before he himself got infected, but instead of 'infection' he 'devoured' the virus, writing it into his own digital code thus birthing his permanent evolution into Gulusgammamon) and with the virus spreading around the digimon in both the digital and human worlds all eyes are on Hiro, Gamma, and Gulus as nobody really trusts Gulus to not be the active cause of this spreading virus, with the only one believing in him being Hiro and Gamma? This way later there can be like... the narrative buddy fight, so to speak. (Though I don't think Hiro would buddy fight :/ He's so passive...)

I'd have to chew on it a bit more to think of what I would do for "The Plot-Plot" but I do know I would want a Huge amount of focus to be on Hiro and his two Gamma's, as what Ghost Game did well was it's smaller personal character moments and also I'm bias as fuck.

-------------------

About a week after your original ask of "If I wrote a digimon fic what would it be?" and my answer was GG but only if I found there was a story that I wanted to tell with the characters, I remembered that there actually WAS a digimon fic I had considered writing but it was also in a "still chewing on it" point of existence, but I had already answered the ask so cuz psuedo on topic I'll add it here!

A while Back KarnEX did a video discussing the early concept for Digimon Frontier I found myself biting my lip because I liked the original idea, so I had started ideating the vague idea of a digimon fic using the concept. (Although once again my brain is like "But what if.... comic...?")

A report is seen on the tv about 'more' children/teens/whatevs going missing, establishing an ongoing crisis. The Protag is going somewhere or something or whatever maybe a travelling circus or music show or SOMETHING to get a moderate group of kids in a single place and a group of Digimon appear and kidnap protag and the other kids; isekai'ing them to the digital world (though the kids don't know they're not in kansas anymore yet.) end of setup.

Here in the digital world for the first act, it follows a Ratchet and Clank: Deadlocked plot: They have been kidnapped by the Digimon who work for a gladitory arena and are being forced to compete for the entertainment and profit of the arena owners (Captialism is the true villain lol). The Arena has Digimon competetors but the arena has found that the more interesting fights come from capturing humans and making them Fuse/Biomerge evolve with a digimon competitor, many of which have ALSO been forced into the arena against their will. From there protag ends up meeting their partner and it becomse kinda like a tournament fighter shounen manga as protag meets other competetors and their own issues trying to survive the arena (characters and storylines like "The Pacifist won't fight but has to learn it's okay sometimes" or the "Dog eat dog competitor" or "The Competitor who is a cinnamon role paired up with a bad or abusive human/digimon partner" etc.) Eventually after the first arena tournament round ends and the second begins; round two requires team fighting and protag manages to create a team of merry misfits and their digimon partners that he befriended/ gained the respect of during round one. They start realizing that they think they can escape the arena via a very specific escape route and try to get back to civilization and call the police on this child-monster-battle-thing. Most of their group get's out, accidentally leaving one of their own behind, maybe there's a forced "Dark Biomerge Digivolution" forced upon the kid or maybe there's a "They left you behind like bad friends!" or maybe there's a "He stayed behind for a reason!" I dunno this character is probably the Ken/Matt/Rika/that one friend who has baggage that digimon likes to have. It's a good character trait I love it.

Now that (most) of the main group has escaped the arena the second act begins where they are effectively let loose out in the digital world, realize that they infact got isekai'd, maybe they have to collect some kind of Macguffins? Maybe the arena is actually run by Satanists summoning the Digital Devil? either way the arena was bad but it was all a front for something worse and the kids need to find a way to stop it, save the other competetors in the arena and go home without the world being destroyed all while some drama plot is being set up with the left behind character. I don't have all the bugs worked out with the second act, I just know it's the big adventure act where they get to explore the whole open digital world while realizing just how close they were to something very very bad happenning to them back at the arena, but also how once you get out of the corruption of the arena this world is beautiful and worth saving.

Act three would be finishing up anything that needs to be done in the overworld, maybe a classic "I have the chance to abandon my friends and go home alone" plot of temptation the the protag gives up and then return to the arena for a final showdown and liberation of the other humans and digimon. Just finishing stuff up y'know.

It's an Idea that could be told with completely original characters but could also be fun to make all the missing kids into known characters from the franchises Anime/Manga/Games/ etc., not in like.... a Xros wars "All the protags are visiting the episode from their own worlds" way but in a "This universe's version of the character" way. Y'know full AU. Also I could put Jerri there and then NOT kill her Leomon.....

Also I had an idea for a mysterious Arena Champion who is a baddass but you learn that they're not in sync in the fusion, the Digimon is repressing their human and steering the whole fusion themselves because they aren't gonna let their human, who is too nice, to get themselves killed so they do what they have to do, repressing the human part of the biomerge in order to take all the hardship themselves. Was gonna consider Koichi from Frontier but I don't think I can do much more than Frontier already did with him and make it interesting. Was gonna consider Ken and Wormmon, having Wormmon repress Ken in the fusion in order to protect him and do the bad stuff himself or vise versa. But then I watched Ghost Game and ngl Hiro with Gamma and Gulus as the champion where Gulus convinced Gamma to help repress and placate Hiro in the fusion so Gulus can fly the plane because he thinks the other two are so soft it'll get them all killed sounds fun and I am biased as fuck.

[sadculturee]

AINUN'S FILM REVIEW

THE HUNGER GAMES: THE BALLAD OF SONGBIRDS AND SNAKES

Ratings: 9.7/10

It was an emotionally conflicting experience watching President Snow's character development and eventual rise to power when they have freaking Tom Blyth playing the protagonist. I am going to need a few nights to render my thoughts and resolve my moral dilemma 🙂 ✌️. All throughout the film, I cannot help but imagine the Tumblr uproar if this were to be released in 2010-2014. I just know Tumblr girlies (me included) would be completely insufferable, simping over yet another problematic fictional man. 

Full disclaimer though, I haven't yet read the book (I will), so my whole review is going to be based on my first time experiencing his story and the film only. Minor Spoiler Alert!

Right off the bat, very surprising (but obviously expected) this film absolutely nailed it. Once again, a Hunger Games movie outmatched previous releases and broke the bad-sequel curse. It would've been a solid 10/10 from me if it didn't push me into a spiral of moral dilemma over Snow's actions and how GORGEOUS he looked when he was younger (/joke) (/but not really) (damn you, Tom Blyth).

Truly, Francis Lawrence did his magic once more, the whole deliverance of the story was a cinematic blessing. The fight scenes and the tension built up before and after the games had me on my feet, gripping the edge of my seat, terrified yet enthralled by what was about to happen. Having read and watched the trilogy, I have a slight notion of how the ending would be. Whatever happens, Snow will survive and rise as the most powerful victor in all of Panem. And to know that, whilst watching the games and his exile story played out, honestly terrifies me. 

Having the story laser-focused (and very well written) on the main villain had me occasionally losing myself in his emotions and perspective, I lost grip on the reality of the abuse and oppression The Capitol inflicted on all 12 districts and their people, with The Hunger Games as the peak reminder of their terrors, showing the people who're actually in power. I found myself empathizing with Snow's character during some of his vulnerable moments. For a moment I imagined if only people were nicer, if his circumstances were a little bit more ideal, Snow would have grown up to be a better person (which obviously was a terribly false assumption as this man is honestly devil reincarnated). 

ALSO, as a self-proclaimed musical addict, I simply cannot write this review without giving my highest praise to Rachel Zegler, Dave Cobb and James Newton Howard for perfecting the film with their music. Every time Zegler starts singing, I get goosebumps all over. Her verses and emotions took hold of my entire body and moved me to feel whatever emotions the creators wanted me to feel. Midway, I felt like Zegler's decision to pursue acting instead of singing should make hit singers grateful because she would sweep them away so quickly with that voice and talent 🥹.

The film perfectly mirrors how fights against oppression are often harshly labelled as unjust terrors or savage rebellions, deserving of brutal punishments by the ruling governments. Regardless of how these "rebellions" were simply a desperate attempt for the oppressed to survive another day. When the stakes are too high, beyond their control, and the prospect of a better future is bleak, they would have nothing more to lose. Fighting would be the only option they have. It would be either fight or die. A literal, real-life hunger game where the whole world is your arena. And considering current global events, the release of this film feels extremely fitting. Which raises one big question: "If you can stand with the rebels fighting for justice, against immoral and inhumane rulings in movies and books, why won't you stand for them in real life?"

The movie ended with Snow finally getting a spot in The Capitol, a near guarantee of a successful future, with his grandmother and Tigris by his side congratulating him. Not going to spoil the ending for anyone who hasn't watched the film, but I'm just gonna say that in that scene I so wish I could hear both Tigris and Snow's inner thoughts and emotions. 

In conclusion, I regret not watching this movie sooner and totally recommend all dystopian fiction fans to watch in the theaters! 

[silent-sanctum]

Storytime about Why I Personally Like Jotaro's Character

I think it's safe to assume that 90% of us ocean man simps (and/or the 11k followers of the joot tag) had to have hated the guy in the beginning, only to watch p4 and say "hold on wait a minute I'm feeling sumn" and then go back to p3 and say "oh shit hold up".

'cause when i first started p3, i remember jotaro calling holly a bitch and that led to my first impression of him: "Oh so if jonathan was the gentleman jojo and joseph is the wacky jojo, this is the edgy jojo. I'm sure I won't like him at all with that attitude".

let me tell you... i hate assholes. antagonists. absolute douchebags. the too obnoxious men, and edgy men for the sake of being solely edgy.

and i kind of had the same feeling of him throughout the first few episodes, and then the more the plot went, the more I got to see bits of his subtle heart of gold personality come through and I thought to myself "no way but he's still an asshole, why am i beginning to not hate him at all?"

but I couldn't bring myself to hate the guy when in certain moments he brings up his dorky one-liners, the tiny curl that forms his seldom smiles, his general badassery. So at the very least I now respected the dude by the end of p3.

And then p4 happened.

Oh man. Did 4taro do something because damn, this version of him was what got me simping for the man.

Idk what happened but right at the beginning of ep 1, I see him in that taxi in his white fit and immediately, I disregarded the sudden art change and already vibed with the first scene of jotaro in that moment.

and i was greatly confused to say the least. I've been keenly aware of my tastes in fictional men and so far before joots, they were often very.....

let's just say... "young anime boy" visuals.

LISTEN. Don't ask why Kirito is here; I was still in middle school when he became my fictional crush eye-

anyways-

soon after, even if i was enjoying josuke and his friends in their slice of life shenanigans, i admittedly looked forward for scenes where joot would be in it, got excited when he does something cool and badass, and just appreciate him just vibing silently in the background, probably thinking a million things at once- the murderer, his thesis, the stand arrow, his job etc.

cue to the end, and I really like like jotaro at this point. As in the "holy shit... my new fictional mans?" like.

I was in denial. Because no- Just no??? How did this happen?

Was it because he grew out of his angsty rebellious teen phase, and into this now mature professional, Stand expert, and mentor who's learned how to not be excessively rude while still keeping true to himself as seen in his stoicism, intelligence, and badass nature?

and then to realize he was a DILF in p6?? And a divorced man??? And that he explicitly shows the audience his feelings towards his family for the first time???

Oh man. I was never too into dilfs... but-

So I rewatched p3 scenes again and there I was able to like 3taro as much as 4taro and 6taro. I grew to notice more of his very subtle character amidst the rebellious façade- using that big brain of his in fights, the way he has fun with the crusaders by doing party tricks, the more amount of smiles he does that i failed to notice at first watch, understanding why he shouts at certain women, the utmost care and love he has for his friends and family and how much he'll go through just to keep them safe.

I even grew to love the rugged, buff design of 3taro, which I now admit is kind of a favorite now along with 4taro.

Ultimately, I like jotaro because even though he gives off a very bad first impression, you get to watch his character go through a bunch of events throughout the parts, and see how other bits of his sides and personality surface, develop, and change the more he grows in experience and age.

Idk if it's just me, but I am a sucker for quality character development and jotaro shows exactly that- from being a rebellious delinquent who walled his vulnerabilities behind a rude mask, to a wise mentor-figure who knows better than to be impulsive and rash, to a caring father who'll sacrifice the universe and himself for his only child to live.

holy shit this was l o n g but I needed to get this out of my system because my god, I love this man sm.

and i know i have ranted about this before, but istg, the dudebros be literally seeing jotaro's personality as nothing but a man who's misogynistic and simply punches his enemies to a pulp to solve the issue, without realizng that he has to think of ways of getting closer to the enemy in the first place. Hence why yall shallow mfers think he's a bland protagonist with the emotions of a brick wall smh.

[mozillavulpix]

I'd like to hear your take on peak Gohan

Oh lol you saw!

Okay, let's do this.

Why Tournament of Power (anime) Gohan is Peak Gohan

1. He can actually fight

Gohan 'discourse' I find often gets oversimplified into two camps; the 'why isn't Gohan a badass fighter' camp, and the 'why can't Gohan just live in peace and not fight' camp. And the two of them feel like they're constantly arguing with each other over how Gohan should be characterised.

But I kind of find myself seeing valid points in both camps. On the one hand, I don't want Gohan forced into a lifestyle that doesn't suit his personality. But on the other hand, I also know that Dragon Ball is a fighting show and if you don't have the ability to fight (or even worse, used to have the ability to fight but lost it), you kind of look really lame no matter how many cute slice-of-life moments there are. (This is the problem I had with DBS Ep 52)

So, like...why can't he have both?

People act like there's some hard rule that if Gohan doesn't 100% dedicate his entire life to training like Goku does, he'll never get stronger (and in fact will keep actively getting weaker), but...why does that even have to be the case? This is just fiction. You can easily say "he found a compromise where he's a scholar but maybe trains a bit in his spare time so he won't get weak". I think it'd make enough sense for his character. He wants to be a scholar, but he also cares a lot about protecting his family and friends. It feels pretty natural.

2. It fixed Ultimate Gohan

Conceptually, Ultimate Gohan is honestly one of the coolest thing in the late era of Dragon Ball. After one flashy transformation after another, the idea someone's final form is basically them looking exactly the same – no big hair or scary glowing eyes – and yet remaining as powerful as someone with a form like that is just really cool to watch. It gives that sense that the character is in total control, not consumed by rage or whatnot to turn them into a different personality.

My personal big issues with the form, however, are that 1. Gohan basically gets given it for free without having to do much at all. In fact, he has to literally sit there and do nothing while he has a ritual performed on him. It's good comedy, but not as satisfying as him, like, literally having to fight and sweat for his power-up. Especially one which has all the trademarks of being a 'Final Form'.

And 2., Toriyama makes Gohan's personality when he uses that form against Super Buu very assertive and cocky, almost overconfident. Which obviously happens in fights sometimes, but Gohan is probably the member of the cast who is naturally the least like that, so it's kind of jarring to see him suddenly smack-talking his enemy like Vegeta.

It's kind of not why I like Gohan, so I really didn't like the implication that 'for Gohan to be a strong fighter, he needs to be cocky and a generic badass'.

Anyway, Gohan in the Tournament of Power fixes both these issues. For one, he has to seemingly work and train to get the 'Ultimate' 'form' back again, even if it was directly only for 1 or 2 episodes in the Super anime. And even with that power, he still maintains the traditional personality of the more polite member of the cast who also really appreciates and hypes up everyone else.

He's kind of like...the moe one, if that makes sense.

3. He gets to be cool without it feeling overblown

This was basically the issue I had with Vegeta in Dragon Ball Super. It's fun to give a character power-ups and big emotional moments, but if you reach too far, it starts to feel like mindless pandering to fans without any real understanding of a narrative.

Vegeta gets a lot in modern Dragon Ball, a lot of it for basically no reason other than ticking off a checklist. (The most egregious example to me was SSG in the Broly movie. It's not the most powerful form, there's basically no reason to even use it, but they made him dramatically use it in the movie just to prove to people he had it.)

Anyway, when they brought Gohan back, I was worried it'd fall into that trap, but it hasn't (so far). He didn't get any big power-up in the Tournament of Power, his little plot was all about learning to fight better with the power he already had. He didn't beat or even fight Jiren. Because the story took it conservative with him and decided he didn't have to be the strongest or even get close to Goku's level within one arc to show that he was cool. Sometimes you can wholeheartedly appreciate a character for what they are and what they've done, and not for what they're not.

This is also the reason why Tournament of Power (manga) isn’t part of the discussion. Because 1. I actually have trouble believing...power-scaling wise, that he’d be stronger than Kefla, it feels like too much of a jump in power to the point it feels unsatisfying and 2. he acts weirdly confident and not as polite and empathetic there, it falls too much into the trap of the Super Buu fight.

and...I think that's about it?

[gukieater]

Fic idea 1 : Apocalyptic Heart

Pairing: Jungkook x OC (f) X Taehyung

Genre: Post Apocalyptic World, Zombie, Special Ability (Jungkook), experiments, evolution, illegal medical trial, inhuman treatment, Survival, Angst, fluff (eventual smut), possible future yandere (Jungkook), blood, possible dismantling, biting, death of minor characters, age difference, noona.

Disclaimer: This is not a full fiction or story, merely a plot. Please read this post before proceeding. If you are reading this, you can reblog the post if u want to!

Music Recommendation: Wolves of Odin- Colossal Trailer Music

Plot or Synopsis: It is about an apocalyptic world where the human population is overthrown by mutated creatures, who once used to be human. L/N Y/N is a 21 year old girl surviving on her own. She's constantly on the road, salvaging supplies for survival, on her daily run, she meets lone or group of survivors but she never sticks around, living by her rule "Alone is Safe".

On her journey to survival she meets a pregnant woman who seems to be on the run and in a pretty bad shape. Around 3 years ago, Y/N lost her sister when the breakout started, and she remembered how she was helpless enough not being able to save her sister. Seeing the pregnant woman, she is reminded of her elder sister and gets attached. So she decides to stay by her to take care of her and her unborn baby and breaks the one and only rule she lived by so far, to survive alone.

Soon she realizes the woman is being chased by people, not just brain eating monsters. They seem powerful and battle ready. She kept asking the woman why she was being chased and she told Y/N the less she knew, the safer she will be. Running from them being the 1st priority, she doesn't press the woman for further explanation. One day while supply run, they are cornered by those mystery men's and they go into hiding. The anxiety and stress leads the woman to go into labor and she gives birth to a boy. But soon their hiding location is compromised and they need to run again. After the birth the woman is too weak to run. So refuses to go with Y/N saying she will slow them down. So Y/N now has a choice to either stay and get caught by those men or take the baby and run, leaving the mother behind. The woman insists she does the later. Y/N doesn't argue further, knowing that's the only logical thing to do. So even though she feels guilty, she vows to the woman to protect the child and runs away while the woman buys her time by tricking them thinking she has the baby.

Y/N is not the kind to stay in the same location for long as it draws the undead but she needs a place to keep the baby safe, since she can't carry him to her daily run. So she decides to settle down in some outskirt, to raise him in safety. But things starts to get complicated when she notices the kid isn't an average child. He is growing at an unprecedented rate and shows undisputable strength. By the time the child was 1 months old, he already grew into a 1 year old kid.

Although she decides to take the child in to protect it and raise, in the back of her mind she somewhat resents it, knowing it was the reason the mother had to sacrifice herself. It reminds of herself, how her elder sister sacrificed herself to a group of undead when they broke into her house in the middle of the night so she can buy Y/N some time to run away. If it wasn't for either of them, her sister and the mother would be alive. So she never cuddles the baby, only holds him when he's crying, doesn't name him, never shows any affection towards it. She feels kind of relieved for the child's growth as she didn't need to care for an infant for long. But there is something in the way the child looks at her, like she holds the moon and star for him, sometimes it bothers her as if the child sees through her.

After 4 months of settling down in a outskirt school near the hill, one day she returns home after salvaging for rations, she saw that the boy was not in the room. She clearly remembers locking the door when she left but seeing the door unlocked, she starts to panic. She starts looking for the boy and curses herself for not naming him. While calling out to the boy, she hears a faint voice. She followed the trail of voice and as she moved closer, the faint voice became clearer and she can clearly hear someone calling for 'Noona'. When she stepped into the backyard she could she the boy crouching down to a half-dead plant. As the boy touched the plant she watched in her dismay the plant coming back to life. Noticing her presence, the boy looked at her direction and calling out to her as "noona". She was both shocked and scared because she never taught him to speak neither spoke much around him. The boy observed her and watching her act distant and frightened around him made him upset. As he tried to approach her to hold her hand and comfort her, she kept looking at the plant. She saw the plant wither and eventually rot as he took a step further to her direction. She was startled, she tumbled on her feet and fall down on her back and called him a monster. With teary eyes he told her his name was Jungkook,not monster or "kid". Jungkook, that's what his mother wanted to call him.

She had a lot of questions to Jungkook. Like how he opened the lock, how he knew what her mother wanted to call him, how he knew how to speak and knew what monster meant and how was he doing that to the plant. He said that he felt sad and lonely so he wanted to find you, at first he didn't know how the lock worked but he figured it out. When he made it to the backyard, he the only thing that felt alive in there was the plant and it was dying. He felt like he could help it. When she asked how he knew what sadness and loneliness was he said he shared the memory of his mother from her pregnancy. She would often cry and feel restless what she termed as sadness or loneliness until she came along. That's how he knew who Y/N was, why he called her noona and how he knew he could trust her, as he described how his mother felt around her, safe & warm. She doesn't question further about the wilting plant. After talking to Jungkook, she started connecting the dots about why his mother was chased and how Jungkook was no ordinary child. She realized maybe keeping Jungkook safe won't be just as easy as raising him.

Jungkook learned and picked up on things quite easily so going to runs was getting quite easier but still uneasiness settled in Y/N's mind. She can't control the situation when she's away and the thought of Jungkook taken away or even worse getting attacked was quite startling. She never shows it but she deeply cares about the kid. Jungkook himself was quite clingy towards Y/N although she never reciprocates the affection. She simply keeps up the role of a provider. it's been already 16 months since they've been living in the outskirt and the undead are picking up on her scent due to her daily trail in the same direction as she keeps seeing more and more of them in the surrounding area.

So after a few close encounters and trial salvage run with Jungkook, she decides to move out of the outskirt and target bigger cities. She avoided bigger cities so far thinking the people chasing Jungkook's mother may still be looking for him. By the time living there, Jungkook already grew up to become a teenager so she reasoned, the people looking for him would be looking for a child, not so much of a well-build boy who looks like who is in his late teen's. She thought maybe it's time to move around. But maybe it was not a good decision after all. Things starts to shift, not always for the best interest. Few days in the city, Y/N starts to realize that Jungkook is perfectly fit to tend for himself and rather than keeping him safe, Y/N is the one slowing him down and making him vulnerable. If she's caught with Jungkook they can use her against him to make him comply but if she's not with him, he is perfectly capable and trained to slipping away.So she decides its time to go back to her old way of life. But things doesn't go as easy as she thought as with time she got extremely attached to Jungkook. On the other hand, Jungkook experiences the same thing unfold in front of him again. At first it was his mother, who was separated from him and now his Noona whom he loves very dearly is abandoning him again. He is upset and he doesn't understand why is she leaving him and it's driving him mad. He can't even read her as he promised he won't do it without her permission. Jungkook's heart is breaking but he departs from her without any objections.

On a run close to a suspicious facility, Y/N meets a survivor who she helps escape from people that looked a lot like the people chasing Jungkook's mother. The boy, not more than 2/3 years older than her introduces himself as Dr. Kim Taehyung, a young scientist from the facility. At first she doesn't trust him but things take turns and Taehyung proves to be someone reliable. Eventually she discovers a lot about the breakout, the undead and how the facility handled the things only to make it worse. Then he mentions something about the authority going crazy about a subject escaping the facility more than 1.5 year ago and Y/N becomes alert. The description of the escaped subject eerily matched with Jungkook's mother. So she questions taehyung about it and what she finds out leaves her frantic and full of fear & guilt. She sets out to find Jungkook with the help of Taehyung as soon as she can. When departing from Jungkook she knew they would both suffer but what she did not know that, growing up, the bond he shared with her, breaking it or separating Jungkook from her would take a big toll on Jungkook. With every passing moment without her, Jungkook will loose a piece of him that made him human, made him the boy Y/N knew & raised and turn him into more of a thing Y/N feared him to be in the beginning, a monster.

PS: is it a plot anymore? I'm not sure 😅. The plot I intended to write turned out to be more detailed than I would have originally liked but ehh, whatever. If anybody does decides to write about it, they have the full liberty to make changes into the plot or turn or take the story further in any direction they want. Whether they decide to give me a credit for it or nah, it's their discretion but if they do, it would be appreciated so the readers finding this blog may enjoy the full story as well ❤️

This picture is inspired by the entire storyline so far. The pictures I used to make this collage are collected from Pinterest, I don't own them.

[discrunkled-twog]

Normalize having an idea for a story, a book, a cartoon, a visual novel, any form of media you want it to be and not being able to share it in the fear that it's bad, the idea will be stolen, you don't have the skills to execute it properly, and the fact that the only thing people know you for is fanfiction, not just any fanfiction, but ship fanfiction, romance, meaning that even if you tell somebody your idea, nobody will take it seriously and the fact that that's all anyone knows you for and all you'll be known for until you crawl out of the safe pit of the internet that feels so much like home and venture out into the world to create something that has taken your entire life to be able to accomplish only for it to be neglected in spite of the safe, cushy romance everyone is used to instead of science fiction or a murder mystery or something where for once, not every single character kisses someone, because as nice as kisses and cuddles are, maybe every once in a while you feel like doing something different; maybe only to see if you can do it, to prove to yourself that this isn't the only thing you're capable of, maybe to show others that there is an original thought in your head and you're not a copy-pasted hackneyed rip-off of someone else's creativity, or maybe because you tell yourself that if you don't crawl out of your comfort zone every once in a while, the same comfort zone that becomes confining after a while, than you'll be stuck making things no one takes seriously for the rest of your life, even though it's just a hobby and even though you yourself claim not to take it seriously, but you do take it seriously because it's fun, and that's enough for you, damn it and maybe some day people will see that you can do other things and you can create fantastical universes if only you're given the chance; the chance to prove that you're more than a fanfiction writer or a romance writer or a comedy writer or whatever the hell else gives you joy at the moment, even though you don't plan to do it forever, and even if you do, it won't be the main focus in your life but you can't see how people don't see that or why it's such a big deal when you know that you did it to yourself, making the mistake of primarily presenting yourself as someone who steals others ideas and twists it around to bring others a bit of joy, including themselves, because apparently they have nothing better to do with their lives.

And again, you did it to yourself by choosing the wrong starter pack when given the chance, because a bright-eyed bushy-tailed younger version of yourself didn't see how it'd turn out and really, you're being far too dramatic as it is, because there's so many people in the world with bigger problems and even more who find ways around your same dilemma; a dilemma that shouldn't even qualify as a dilemma because it's not a serious thing; it's something that creeps up in the back of your head at night as you quietly sigh at the realization that if you don't pull yourself out of the sparkling trench of fiction, beautiful, soft, comforting fiction, you might end up on the streets or in a tired office job, and the realization that neither is any worse or better in a way, but sometimes you forget it's only a creeping thought in the back of your mind and in front of your eyes staring you down long enough to intimidate you, and that it doesn't mean anything, even if you've seen it dance mockingly in front of you for hours at a time, hoping to crumble the last bit of your irrelevant sanity, even though it's just a thought, and it's not important, and how would you know if you don't try?

So you try, you at least try to try or imagine trying and all you see is the same thing staring back at you, distant and blurred telling you how you're stupid for trying, stupid for worrying, and even stupider for thinking it would hold any significance in either your life, or anyone elses.

And then you open your computer, to find one thing in your inbox, a simple nice comment that makes you smile a bit, and you feel pride flutter in your heart for a second as you wander around the internet, revisiting old works and old comments, and seeing the votes or kudos or bookmarks or comments, oh, the comments and realizing how many individual people woke up that day and smiled to read something you smiled at while writing, even if it was a quick thought in the middle of the night, a passing fancy, or a well-thought out, convoluted plot where all that happens at the end is the same thing that happens in the millions of stories in the archives, and they while some of them enjoyed it, a few of them wanted to save it to read it again, and maybe, just maybe, one of the people; the faceless, nameless people, tells you something they found appealing; whether it be your ability to fake someone else's imaginary people or the terrarium in which you've placed the people, and it makes you smile a bit, a lot, until you're squealing alone in your bedroom, staring at a screen, and the thought resides.

Because maybe, that one comment makes it all worthwhile.

[tedesquire]

Hi! Could I please add another request to my list? :D it's based off a Hey Arnold episode in which Bill and the reader are on a week long school vacation and they run into each other at the beach and Bill develops a crush on a pretty girl who befriends him but the reader finds out the girl's only using Bill to win a sandcastle contest in order to be on the show Baywatch. The reader tries to tell Bill but he won't listen and he eventually overhears the girl talking with her boyfriend and tells her off only to win the contest with the reader and they confess their feelings? 💕💕

Summer Lovin’ 

Words: 2554

Warnings: cursing, female pronouns (but no genitalia mentioned and no skin color specified) a bit of angst (fluffy ending though)

Author’s Note: first of all, I fucking love Hey, Arnold! and definitely love Helga G. Pataki with all my heart. She’s a weirdo and I love it. I knew exactly what episode you were talking about. I can't believe you got me to write 13 pages of fanfic for such a specific and niche fandom, but hey, I don’t do this for the fame. I do this for the little bit of serotonin my brain gets when I imagine myself in scenarios with fictional characters because real men are disappointing. (Mod Olivia)

-

You hated Bill. You hated the stupid way his stupid blonde ringlets caught the California sun, the stupid vacant look in his stupid sapphire eyes at almost all times, the stupid fucking sliver of tan skin he exposed with his crop tops that he somehow got away with at school. Not to mention you loathed the stupid fucking grin that he gave to his best friend Ted, the one that proceeded the ridiculous laugh the stupid boy had.

All these things you despised, detested, and loathed with every fiber of your being. Simple annoyances beginning since kindergarten snowballed into a big, white burning ball of hatred for the boy. Hatred that made your cheeks heat up and stomach churn, just as it was doing now.

You had been so excited for Spring Break, your family deciding to travel 5 and a half hours to a beach house in Half Moon Bay. A week of the sun, sea, shopping, seashells, boardwalks, and salt-water taffy, with no Bill to bother you.

 So, naturally, when you had reached the beach after a long day of travel, the sight of Bill sitting on the sand in nothing but a swimsuit, skin glowing with tanning oil, made your heart stutter. Okay, perhaps you didn’t hate him… despise him, detest him, or loathe him entirely. From an outside perspective… some might even say that you were… in love with him. 

Oh God, it was true. You couldn't stop thinking about Bill. He looked like he was sculpted after an angel. A prince charming on a white horse. And what he lacked in academic intelligence he more than made up for with kindness. He always treated you with the utmost respect, while you paid him back in nothing but sarcasm and insults. 

You didn’t know exactly why you were so mean to him. Perhaps it was your nerves trying to stop you from getting overeager and admitting your crush. One day you were going to have to either man up and confess your feelings or get over him but that day didn’t seem to be approaching anytime soon. 

You were intent on pretending he wasn’t here, setting up your own place to sunbathe until you heard your name fall from his lips.

“Y/n!?” Bill walked up behind you, prompting you to turn around to face him. “What are you doing here?”

“Bill.” You stated dryly, “My family and I are staying nearby.”

“No way! My family’s right over there!” He pointed at a nearby beach house, a young woman who you recognized as recently-graduated and newfound wife, Missy Preston making out with Bill’s father on the porch. Ugh.

“Yes way.” You responded dryly. “We’re over there.” You pointed over your shoulder. “Isn’t this a coincidence, my ideal vacation ruined by the one person I didn’t want to see.” You noticed a flicker of disappointment flash in his eyes, but you couldn't stop yourself even if you tried. “Don’t get any weird ideas about getting all chummy with me, trying to hang out or anything. Just because we’re staying at the same beach and all.” You scoffed, causing him to flinch.

“Uh, yeah. Fine with me, y/n.” He rubbed the back of his head sheepishly before walking off. You eyed him, sighing softly. 

“What is the matter with me?” You mumble, setting yourself down on the sand. This would have been the perfect moment to get closer to him if only you didn’t have to open your stupid mouth.

[Bill’s POV]

As Bill walked off, he felt most confused. He could never remember what he did to make you dislike him so much, but tried to get back on your good side. Thankfully, with the sun, sand, and waves surrounding him, Bill couldn’t stay too upset for too long. 

He had decided to finally get in the water, heading towards the crashing shore when he had stepped on something.

Huh. Bill was met with the sight of a brightly colored bucket and shovel. Excellent! There was nothing more resplendent than a nice sand castle. Ted was going to be so jealous when he heard. All he was doing for the week was staying at home watching Deacon. 

Too caught up in his new activity, Bill barely noticed someone approaching him.

“That’s a stellar sandcastle you have there.” Bill’s eyes practically bugged out of his head. Growing up in California he had seen his fair share of tan beach babes, but this one took the cake. A total babe. Talking to me.... Say something, dude!

“Thanks.” Bogus. Thank God Ted wasn’t here to see him blow his shot so odiously.

She pushed her sunglasses down her nose to look over the lenses, her bright eyes meeting his. “My name’s Summer.”

“Bill S. Preston, Esquire.” He puffed up his chest, raking a hand through his hair. 

“Well, Bill S. Preston, Esquire, you seem to be a pretty great artist. That’s the best sandcastle I’ve ever seen.” His dark brows knitted in confusion, looking over her to see if she was teasing him. “I bet you’ll walk away with first prize from the sandcastle competition at the festival thing later this week.”

“Sandcastle competition?”

“Yeah! Whoever wins first place will get a guest appearance on Baywatch! But that’s not until the end of the week. How about, in the meantime, you can show me around the beach? It’s my first time visiting the bay.” Baywatch? That’s only the most triumphant show on television! Ted was going to be so jealous. 

“Sounds most excellent! However, It is also my first time visiting the bay. Perhaps… we could explore the area together?”

“I like the way you think, Bill.” She winked, sitting on the sand next to him, the pair getting comfortable.

“What the hell?” You mumbled, looking over your book to watch Bill cozying up with a stranger. Your heart twisted painfully, swallowing thickly, You had no right to be jealous, he wasn’t your boyfriend, not to mention you were cruel to him in every interaction, but that didn’t stop a bitter taste from forming on your tongue. 

You stood, collecting your things and trekking back to your beach house, the beach having lost its luster.

-

You were so over this vacation. You would have given anything to stay at home. It seemed everywhere you went, Bill and that girl seemed to be infecting the air with their infatuation. 

For the past two days you’ve had to suffer watching the pair on the beach splash each other with sea water, build sand castles, and sunbathe with each other; However, that was nothing compared to today.

You and your family had decided to spend the afternoon on the boardwalk. There you had to endure the couple on the carousel holding hands, feeding each other saltwater taffy, and watching the sunset by the wharf. Most fucking heinous. 

It was early evening, and thankfully, Bill and whatever her name was were nowhere to be seen. You didn’t know if you would vomit or cry every time Bill had given her that award-winning smile, the one you so badly wanted to be the recipient of. 

You didn’t think it could get any worse, until you had leaned against the pier, ears picking up a familiar voice, Bill’s. Your heart fluttered, only to sink back down when you realized he was still with her under the boardwalk, back on the beach. 

“Isn’t this amazing?”

“You are.” You scoffed at Bill’s attempt at flirting, ignoring the tightening of your throat.

“I’m so glad I met you.” She giggled. “I’ve never felt so comfortable with anyone.” 

If it had been any other couple, you might have enjoyed such a romantic conversation. This was all your fault, if you hadn’t been such a bitch to Bill on the first day, perhaps it would have been you and him hanging out at the boardwalk. 

“Can I see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll be here!” 

“Excellent!” You heard him scat in that ridiculous, high-pitched way he did with Ted when they mimicked a guitar. As he walked off, you smiled, not noticing you were crying until a tear slid down your cheek.

You were such an idiot. If only you were able to act normal for a fucking minute and effectively communicate with Bill about your feelings. You had fucked up, it was too late. 

“Hey!” You had heard her speak again, wondering if Bill had returned.

“Hey, babe.” That was definitely not Bill.

“It’s all going according to plan. I do believe Bill is falling head over heels for me.”

“Well who wouldn’t?” You rolled your eyes, angrily wiping the tears off your cheeks.

“He thinks I really like him. What a moron.” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. What the hell was she talking about?

“If he’s as good as you think he is, we’ll for sure win the contest and end up on Baywatch.” It only took you a second to connect all the dots. This jabroni was clearly her boyfriend, and she was only flirting with Bill to win the stupid castle contest.

You had heard enough, running back to the beach in hopes of finding Bill. 

-

Fuck, all these beach houses looked the same. If Bill hadn’t pointed out which house he was staying at you would have no idea how you would find him.

You knocked on the door, praying you remembered the right house, and that Bill would answer instead of his hormonal parents. 

“Y/n?” Thankfully Bill did answer the door, hair wet from what you assumed to be a recent shower. “How’s it...hanging?” He stepped out onto the porch, shutting the door behind him.

“Hey. I’m sorry about being a dickweed earlier.” He seemed as equally surprised as you were by your apology. “Um, I guess I was just thrown off at your presence… that’s not really an excuse… anyways, the whole reason I’m here is about that girl you were with earlier.”

“Summer? What about her, dude?” Oh my gosh, of course her name was something as pretentious as Summer. 

“Well, I’m not exactly sure how to tell you this, but… She’s using you. I was on the boardwalk, and I had overheard you leaving, and I guess her boyfriend came up to her.. Long story short, she’s going to try and get you to build her a sandcastle to win that festival thing at the end of the week and take the credit so they can win the roles on Baywatch.” You met his eyes, swallowing thickly. “I’m sorry.” 

He stayed quiet, your eyebrows furrowing. 

“That’s heavy. I mean, I’m not stupid. You’re usually most cruel around me, and now you’re acting all...nice? I do not think I’m falling for this one.”

“You don’t believe me?” You couldn’t believe it. “I know I could be less of a bitch to you, but I’ve never lied to you in all the years I’ve known you. You just met her three days ago!”

“Y/n…” He spoke carefully. “I think you were correct when you said we shouldn’t try to hang out just because we’re staying at the same beach.” Your throat tightened, that sour taste returning to your tongue.

“Fine!” You hissed. “I don’t even know why I wasted my breath and time trying to warn you. God, I wish we had never come to this stupid fucking beach!” You ran off his porch into the sand, face burning with shame.

-

Bill couldn’t stop thinking about your interaction yesterday. He was barely paying attention to anything Summer was saying to him. He wished Ted was here. He always knew what to say.

He walked beside her on the boardwalk, eyes glued to the crashing waves, mind replaying the scene over and over again.

“Bill, are you listening?” Bill blinked, turning to face her, cheeks flushing.

“Sorry.”

“I said I’m going to get more sunblock, you’re looking a little pink.”

“Oh, thanks, babe.” He heard her walk off, zoning out again. You had looked so betrayed when he didn’t believe you, but, it couldn't be you were telling the truth. Why would you do something like that? All you seemed to do was glare at him, brush him off, and scoff at his jokes. It was clear he wasn’t your favorite person.

He snapped himself out of his thoughts once more, looking around to see if Summer had come back yet. His eyes caught her figure walking up the beach and he raised his hand to wave, stopping when he saw her wrap her arms around some unknown guy. He was too far away to hear what they were saying but knew what it meant when she had kissed him. Y/n was right. And I was so non-non-non excellent to her.

-

Sweat was dripping from Bill’s brow, his chest heaving as he panted. He could not remember where your house was, even if it was supposedly close to his own. It was the third time he had run up and down the coastline, trying to remember where you had pointed four days ago.

This was ridiculous, he was never going to find you… until Monday, when you both would be at school. But that was days from now!

“Y/n!” He fell to his knees in the sand, trying to catch his breath. 

“Bill?” 

“Y/n!” It was a miracle. He noticed the basket in your hands, having collected odd rocks, seashells and glass while walking along the shore. You had been trying to explore away from your house, hoping not to run into the very man who was looking for you.

“How’s it… hanging?” You asked awkwardly, scanning the area for the female that was usually seen by his side. “Where’s Summer?” He scrambled to stand in front of you.

“Y/n, you were most veracious last evening. Summer had been pursuing me with malicious intent. I caught sight of her embracing her boyfriend and I knew you were speaking the truth. I regret the way I treated you. I should have trusted you.”

“I mean… You had reason to doubt me. It’s not all your fault. Besides, it seemed as if she really liked you. I probably wouldn’t have believed me either.” You coughed awkwardly, rubbing the back of your head sheepishly. “Um, to be honest, I really only acted so bogus because I… like you.”

“No way…” He breathed, trying to recall any instance where it seemed you had a crush on him.

“Uh.. yeah. Yes way.” Your cheeks pinked. “But I obviously don’t expect you to return the feeling. I just get really nervous around you so I guess I figured I should treat you like dirt instead of trying to talk to you like a normal person. But I was worried you would think I was too weird, or that I talk too much, or-” You were cut off by a pair of lips. It was so foolish… and so Bill. 

“What about Summer?” You asked once he had pulled away.

“What about her?” It was just like Bill to not stay too upset for too long. 

His gaze was burning, his lips curling into that perfect, knee-melting, pearly smile. That smile you couldn’t stand. That smile that you couldn’t believe was finally directed at you.

[fireemblems24]

I am so glad you pointed out the imperialist vibes Edelgard has sometimes. As someone who lives in a country who was basically occupied ahem conquered because they said "we have better ideas that will improve your lives" and had our culture absolutely shattered, one of the main reasons why I disagree with Edelgard so much is because of that. She thinks her point of view is superior and the most morally right and I really don't like it whenever she sounds so confused about people defending their homeland. Especially that one line she has with Dimitri in Chapter 17 ffffff—

Like, girl, they have the fucking right to disagree with you please stop sounding so confused as to why they can't see eye to eye with you gahhhhh

I would be more tolerant with the war if she had say, did diplomacy before it? But she tried to had Dimitri and Claude killed in Part I (the prologue). I would also understand her better if the war was a last resort and the other leaders were corrupt and all that. But they're not. Many of the students (who have power because many are noble heirs) outside her house are heavily affected by the nobility and Crests (Sylvain, Ingrid, Mercedes, Lysithea, etc.) or at least understanding of the problems caused by them (Dimitri). It's so frustrating how so much of this can be prevented if she just talked about it.

Also, to those who said she wants the change to be quick, even with war it won't be. The fucking war basically caused continent-wide damage. It's going to be so hard to actually fix this. Hell, there's definitely going to be an eventual rebellion by former Kingdom / Alliance people or sympathisers. It's not going to be as clean cut as the game or some pro-Edelgard people make it to be. Not everyone is going to agree with her, whether she takes over or not. She just destroyed the stability of the continent and while yes, she can rebuild it again, it will still take time and who's to say future leaders won't be corrupt? Also, a hierarchy will always exist, whether she likes it or not. Especially if she plans to set up a meritocracy. Meritocracy is going to usually end up giving power and privilege to those with already pre-existing privilege as they the opportunity to show off their merits or develop those skills. Poor and disabled people are going to have difficulty as they don't have equal opportunity to develop skills and accomplish stuff. I'm generalising, but it just ends up as a hierarchy, again. Not only that, it also has ways to enforce discrimination.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, she needs to long term plan out her systems. I apologise since I have bad memory but as far as I remember, the game doesn't give us too many details on how she wants to establish her system. All I remember is she does the war > Church / Rhea out of power > Establish her government > ???. Someone please clear this up for me because I'm confused.

...and again really, diplomatic reforms are an option. Yes, they're much more tedious. Yes, they take so much more longer. Yes, sometimes it feels impossible to accomplish. But did she not even consider it as an option?

All in all, I do like Edelgard. But I really wish the game let us go against her while we're with her? I wish it wasn't just general "agree with Edelgard" for CF. I remember someone pointing it out to me before that it would've been really great if she had someone in her house who does the same role Felix does in AM... which is basically disagree and call out the lord's shit. And they pointed out Ferdinand could've probably been that character for CF. And I kinda agree? I really think CF would immensely improve if Edelgard had a challenger / foil to her beliefs similar to how Felix does that for Dimitri.

Anyway, sorry for the very long ask lol. I like Edelgard and I agree with some of her morals and ideals such as the crest system being bad but....she's done so dirty asdfghjkl. I do think she's written well enough to incite these emotions in me, and she makes for a good antagonist. As a protagonist lord however.... yeah.

First off, sorry it took so long to respond, but I wanted to give an equally throughout response. 

While I haven’t gotten to chapter 17 yet, I can attest to the notion that Edelgard’s rhetoric is eerily similar to Imperialist propaganda. I do understand this is fiction, and that it’s okay to hand-wave/enjoy things in fiction that you shouldn’t or wouldn’t in real life. Crimson Flower has its charms and parts I enjoy. Edelgard is an interesting character more hampered by things that plague Three Houses as a whole than anything else, but it’s still worth examining how dangerous her rhetoric is. Because, unlike you, my country sits at the opposite end - the Imperialist nation selling that rhetoric to its citizens, and, unfortunately, at the time I bought it - which makes me really sensitive to this. 

I’m from the US and I’m specifically speaking about the US’s invasion of the Middle East. I was in middle or high school, just barely a teenager, and naive and ignorant enough to believe what my leaders said. Because guess what? I bought into it out of misplaced and ignorant (and racist) compassion. I was horrified at the idea these people were suffering unfairly just because of where they were born whereas I got all these promised privileges just because of where I was born. I really thought the US would go in there and give them democracy and everything would be great. Looking back, I realize they were lying, that we’ve only made things worse, that it’s horribly racist to assume the US was just inherently better, and I’ve sense then gained access to fast-speed internet, traveled, matured, etc . . . and thankfully this all happened before I had any actual power to do anything like vote. But to this day I’m beyond pissed off they used my own compassion against me to line their own pockets. It was ignorant and racist, but it was all based in concern that others didn’t have the same quality of life I had and a growing realization of my own privilege. And that’s what I hate so much. It didn’t sound evil. It sounded good. It used people’s good will and compassion against them and twisted it into evil for their own causes. 

I don’t think Edelgard is after Faerghus and the Alliance because she wants oil. I think she honestly thinks she’s doing good. And, if this were real life, I think that makes her rhetoric even more dangerous than a corrupt politicians’.  Because everything else is still the same. She’s being ignorant, nationalist instead of racist in this case, and honestly thinks her moral superiority will improve everyone’s lives even if it means ravaging the entire content in war. She is dangerously naive and ignorant. 

Maybe I’d support her more morally if I believed for an instant the general populace welcomed the changes she wants to bring, if the leaders she fought against weren’t open and wanting change themselves, ect . . . But the dialogue indicated her presence inspires people running and screaming in terror, not welcoming her presence (see the chapter where you kill Claude). The Kingdom is still fighting tooth and nail against her. She’s not supported. Her changes aren’t wanted. And she hasn’t bothered to learn a single thing about the cultures she’s determined to squash under her heal nor the leaders heading them. 

I also think I’d support her better if we had a clearer idea of what her plans were. But CF has shifted from Edelgard speaking about interesting ideas and classism to evil dragon overlords and chastising Byleth for making her blush. The decision to side with her or Rhea is not choosing between two ideals, but an emotional, spur of the moment thing. Edelgard’s early supports with Byleth attempt to convince the player to side with her not based on political ideals, but on feeling sorry for her. 

CF gives you no choice but to agree with everything Edelgard says (as you said, there’s no “Felix” or a “Lorenz”). It wants you to support her war without question, and therefore you don’t get any answers to questions like - if this is really just about Rhea, why are we invading the Alliance? Because they won’t hand power over to you? Why didn’t you just stick to the Empire to enact your changes? In the end, you’re left with what sounds more and more like an entitled Imperialistic princess with absolutely no idea how ignorant she is hell bent on conquering what she thinks belongs to her based on a conspiracy theory. 

All that said, I do think Edelgard has interesting ideas and isn’t wholly wrong, just how she goes about it is horribly wrong. And I fully believe the core issue is how CF has dropped the ball big time writing wise, because diving deeper into her ideas and not her crush on you would go a long way. So would shifting the narrative away from evil boogey dragon lady must die and everyone else is wrong and I am superior and right and more towards a clashing of ideals, this route could’ve been a lot more and seemed a lot less ignorant, naive, entitled, and Imperialistic. 

[alastanor]

So maybe this is just wishful thinking on my part...

But when you see how this boy smiles, how huge that smile is.

ALL. THE. TIME.

It is kind of weird to see his smile change for a little bit when we get to this scene.

He is asking Charlie what she thinks, and she is genuinely overjoyed by everything he has done to make her hotel more welcoming and warm for demons interested in staying.

Her joy and happiness are so apparent, she approaches him with a huge smile of her own. And for a split second, that huge smile of his seems to soften. Just slightly, but if you pause it's there. Maybe this is just coincidence, but unlike some of the weird ass animation frames we get when we pause at awkward moments, his softened smile is longer than just a single frame.

Which leads me to think maybe, just MAYBE this is a quick break in the mask Alastor puts up. Because perhaps he is genuinely touched by how happy and appreciative Charlie is for his hard work. Which, if my theory on Alastor is correct, such appreciation is something he never received in hell for all he had done over the past century or so.

I'm not saying this because I ship Charlastor, either. I thought these two would do really well together even just platonically long before I jumped on the Charlastor ship.

The reason why is this:

Charlie and Vaggie are in a relationship, according to sources which include Vivzie herself.

However, without actually finding out through outside channels, I would have just figured the two to be rather close friends. There isn't anything that could really be considered romantic interaction between the two at any point in the pilot.

There are factors that could be involved as to why this may be, but it just seemed odd not to establish their relationship as more romantic in the pilot if they are romantically involved. Especially when the pilot is meant to establish these sorts of things prior to the actual show.

At multiple points in the pilot, their relationship seems to be somewhat off-balance. Charlie seems to rely on Vaggie more than what could be considered normal. Not to say depending on others is wrong, but the give and take between these two in those regards isn't normal for a balanced and healthy romantic relationship.

Vaggie is loving and supportive when we first meet her, but she also indulges Charlie in her dependency to her. Again, this isn't to say that depending on the ones you care about is wrong, but you also need a sense of independence and self-identity. These are two things Charlie seems to struggle with in the pilot.

Vaggie, like anyone who cares about someone else, wants to protect Charlie and see her succeed. We see several instances of her doing as such.

She even goes so far as to pull a spear on Alastor, who she knows is far more powerful than she is but does so because she wants to protect Charlie and the hotel. This is admirable, but the biggest issue with Vaggie's desire to protect Charlie is it keeps her sheltered.

She also endorses Charlie's cold turkey method of "discouraging sin" which we know would not work.

Charlie demonstrates some naivety in the pilot on how Hell (and by extension, the world) works, something that Vaggie does point out briefly but never fully drives home. Charlie feels the need to sing about her goals and dreams "because that is how she best expresses herself," even though life is not a musical. In her song, though Charlie's goals are noble, her ideas on how to reach them are short sighted and inconsiderate. More self-serving to her personal goal than to actually achieving lasting change within a sinner.

We see her throwing away vices each sinner possesses, seeking quick solutions to problems that cannot be solved with them.

This, of course, earns her no favors with her audience for which she is trying to sell her idea. So naturally they laugh and scorn her.

As princess of hell, it would not surprise me if she was sheltered by Lillith and Lucifer. Given her personality upon meeting her, that seems rather likely.

Charlie cannot learn any other way or experience the world as she should in order to grow as a person and into the princess Hell needs if she is constantly protected and sheltered by those who care about her most. Leaving the nest to pursue her goals was a good first step, but unless she can get out and experience the world instead of being sheltered from it, she won't be able to learn or grow.

This is where Alastor comes into play.

Alastor, from the beginning, has kept Charlie and Vaggie separated. Or at least not together for any extended period of time.

After all, Alastor can get away with more when someone is wearing Rose-Colored Glasses than when someone is constantly shooting glares his way.

This is something that both works for and against Charlie. For her in the sense that spending time away from Vaggie and around Alastor would allow her to experience Hell in a more direct way. In the way that Alastor sees it, which would allow for a big paradigm shift and for character growth from Charlie.

But against her in the sense that it leaves Charlie vulnerable to getting hurt. Granted, when you get hurt that is an experience you also learn from. But how Charlie would get hurt is something else entirely.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, Alastor spending more time with Charlie who looks for the good in everything around her, would likely also inspire a change in him and his world view. Even if miniscule.

In this sense, the two are good for one another. They would learn and grow from each other. Which is the goal in fictional stories like this.

This isn't to say Vaggie is a problem character, or that she is wrong to want to protect Charlie. On the contrary, I personally find Vaggie to be a very relatable character. But she, like every member of the Hazbin cast(and every denizen of hell, let's be honest), has some growing to do. And she can't really do that herself if she is focusing all of her energy and attention on protecting Charlie from anyone and everyone she considers a problem or a threat.

But regardless where the shipping chips fall, it will be interesting to see how all the relationships grow and change as the characters themselves do so.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[whyyoudothistomecavill]

Don't - Chapter 1

Hello everyone! This is my first time writing fanfiction. Chapter one is an introduction to the kind of relationship the characters have and, in future chapters I will fill in the gaps left in this part.

But first, let's see how this one goes.

Feedback is greatly appreciated.

I took the name from a song written by Jewel. Go and listen to it. Trust me, after the first verse, THAT person will pop in your head. Never fails.

Before we jump in, there's a few people I need to thank:

@littlefreya for helping me with the editing since I don't have a beta yet, for encouraging me knowing what a big deal this is for me, and for all the things you already know. I'll always be in your debt.

@mary-ann84 for making me feel welcome since day one and putting up with me and my annoying questions at any time of day. Girl, you deserve an award for patience.

@radaofrivia for taking the time to read my ramblings and giving me the reassurance I needed. For showing up out of nowhere when I was almost defeated by my lack of tumblr comprehension and explained everything to me with the patience of a kindergarten teacher. Greek god Henry sent you my way, I have no doubt.

There aren't words enough to express how big of an inspiration all of you are to me. To be able to call you my friends, fills my heart with extreme joy and gratitude. So again THANK YOU.

I took the liberty to tag some people, to some I asked for their permission, to others I didn't, so if this bothers you in any way, just message me and I'll fix it, there's absolutely no obligation and I won't be offended.

With that being said, let's get to the point.

Title: Don't

Pairing: Henry x female reader.

Word count: 1682

Warnings: Angst, fluff, and if you squint your eyes you might find a bit of smut.

Summary: Henry and reader are a couple living together for 1 year. Reader have struggled with self esteem issues and insecurities her whole life and when she met Henry, she thought she had left all that in the past, but certain events made her realize that her soul is far from being healed.

Disclaimer: This is an original work of fiction written by me. Please don't post it anywhere else without my permission. Reblogs here are welcomed of course. Thank you.

"Are you ok, darling?"

"Yes, honey"

"Are you sure? You don't seem ok"

"I'm ok, Hen," you smiled, "I'm just tired. I wanna get home, have a shower and then go to bed"

He didn't seem convinced but he didn't ask again. The rest of the ride home was silent, you looked out the window and prayed for the strength to act like everything was normal, while he concentrated on the road and hummed along to the radio.

But you knew better. You knew that this man, the most gorgeous man on earth, the man you called your boyfriend, the man every woman (and a lot of men too), thirsted for, was also the smartest, the most affectionate and that he paid attention to every single thing, especially you. He could notice the smallest change in your demeanor, he could tell when something was wrong and this time was no difference. He was just giving you time to process whatever it was upsetting you before you could talk to him, but in no way was he buying the "just tired" bs. And you knew it.

You entered the house and discarded your shoes and purse. Henry was taking Kal out of the car and into the house when you said "I'm gonna take a shower," and quickly rushed upstairs without waiting for an answer, you needed to be alone so desperately.

You got into the bathroom and took your clothes off without even glancing in the mirror, you didn't want to see anybody, much less yourself.

The hot water was bliss to your sore muscles, too bad it didn't make a difference to the pain in your heart. You rested your forehead into the tiled wall and felt the water gently massaging your back and legs. You were so immersed in your thoughts that you didn't hear the bathroom door being open. Henry was already behind you, his strong hands caressing your back as light as a feather and his mouth on your ear, "may I join you?"

You turned around and looked at him, at those eyes bluer than the sky itself, at those curls that did things to you just by looking at them, and that smile, the most perfect and genuine smile you had ever seen, it was literally impossible not to smile back at him, it was contagious.

He didn't wait for an answer, he lowered himself to put his arms around your waist as you put yours around his neck and kissed you deeply and tenderly. You knew he did that so you wouldn't have to be on your tiptoes to kiss him, he was so damn considerate and perfect it infuriated you sometimes.

So you closed your eyes and kissed him like there was no tomorrow, he sensed the heat in your kiss and grabbing your behind, lifted you up still kissing you, putting your back against the wall. You instinctively wrapped your legs around him and he broke the kiss to look at you, his hair was tousled all over from the water and your hands. His lips were swollen from the kissing and his eyes were dark with lust but also full of love. Oh,so much love.

"What do you want?" He said, "Tell me. What do you need? I'm here, I'm yours".

Something inside of you broke, it was too much. "I want you, Henry. I need you. Now. Inside of me. Please".

He didn't wait for you to ask again, maneuvering you as if you weighed nothing, he made you descend on his length without breaking eye contact, until you were completely full of him. He started to move, slowly and leisurely making you moan and clung to him for dear life.

He didn't know about the battle that was going on inside you. You wanted him to crawl within you and fill the emptiness eating your soul, you wanted to hold him and never let go, you wanted to stop time. Or maybe go back in time, or just disappear. But for the time being you were just grateful for the water running over both of you, not letting Henry notice that your tears were running as well.

Even if you were shattered inside, your body would always succumb to him, there was no point in resisting, and as he kept moving in and out of you, whispering sweet nonsenses in your ear, the orgasm hit you like a thunder lightning crying out his name, his release following moments later triggered by your loud moans.

He held you still between him and the wall while you both recovered your breath, filling your neck with open mouthed kisses.

He lowered you and you held him tightly, putting your head on his chest, listening to his heart beat. It always soothed you. You both stayed that way under the shower in silence, until you started to feel the boiling inside you rising again. "I'm gonna get the towels" you said, "I got it" said he and with a swift move of his long arms, he reached for the towels and started drying you, hair first, then your body, slowly, caressing every inch of it and leaving light kisses everywhere his hands would pass.

He was kneeling in front of you, drying your legs and slowly going up, your eyes were fixated on him and his movements, not saying a word. He looked up, saw you staring, and reaching up, caressed your face so softly it made you lean your head in his hand, closing your eyes. It was like time stopped and you were there alone just savoring that moment, keeping it in your memory forever and you couldn't help the single tear rolling down your cheek into his hand...

When you opened your eyes, you saw the look of concern on his face, "What is it baby? What's wrong?"

You needed to make a choice, so you chose the truth. At least the one truth that wouldn't hurt him: "I love you so much".

"And that makes you cry?"

You chuckled a little, "No, I sometimes get overwhelmed by all these feelings, I'm sorry for being so sensitive" you said, wiping your eyes and smiling through tears.

He stood up and crashed your lips with his, taking you by surprise and lifting you up, carrying you like a bride to your bed.

He got in too, cuddling you from behind and you intended to get up to find one of his t-shirts, your go-to pajamas since day one with him, but he stopped you with his arm around your waist and pulled you against him, your back on his chest, your naked bodies molding perfectly together under the sheets.

You clutched his hand in yours, closed your eyes and tried to ease your racing heart.

His voice took you back to reality:

"Look at me, love"

You turned around in his arms just enough to look him in the eyes, and it surprised you to see, his were a little watery too.

"I love you" he whispered. "I love you like I never thought it was possible to love someone. You have brought to my life the hope that my tired heart believed was lost. I want to spend every minute of every day with you and when my work keeps us apart, I can't wait to share with you every detail of my day. You know sometimes..." he paused, smiling and looking away, "sometimes I have to tell myself *get it together Cavill! You're a grown man acting like a teenager*, but that's what you do to me" he said looking at you again and caressing your lips with his thumb, "You're my fuel, my reason, you're my last thought when I go to sleep and my first one when I wake up, and I'm so grateful to have you that sometimes I'm scared to think that I don't express it enough for you to actually get a glimpse of how happy you make me. That's why I might seem a little clingy around you... I love you and I want you to know that you can talk to me about anything, that I'm always here for you, it doesn't matter if I'm working or doing anything else, you are my priority, ok?"

You were a crying mess by now and watching his red eyes trying so hard not to cry, wasn't helping.

"Ok?" he said again, clearly demanding an answer from you.

But your words wouldn't come out. How? How could you tell him? How on earth was he supposed to imagine that he had chosen the worst possible moment to tell you this?

So again you settled for the truth, the only indisputable truth you could give him, and nodding you took his face in your hands and kissed him, pulling him on top of you.

He engulfed you in his arms and broke the kiss to breathe, you covered his face with light kisses tasting the salt of his tears which only added more sorrow to your battered soul.

"Make love to me," you said against his lips. He looked at you through hooded eyes and went for the spot on your neck he knew drove you crazy.

This was the truth. The fact that when you were together you couldn't tell where each of you ended and the other began. The absolute certainty of loving him with every fiber of your being, knowing you could never love anyone else this much, not even in a thousand lives. You never hid it. It was impossible to...

A few hours later, you were watching him peacefully asleep, his features even more beautiful in the dim morning light. You carefully kissed him and placed your head on his chest, he held you tighter against him and said something that sounded like "I love you". "I love you too" you said, granting him again the truth you couldn't deny.

The unspoken truth however, the one he was about to learn, was that in fact, the one you didn't love... was yourself.

Tag list:

@mary-ann84 @littlefreya @radaofrivia @demivampirew @dancingwendigo @seb-owns-these-tatas​ @viking-raider​ @cruelfvkingsummer​ @cherry-acid​ @achaoticaugust​ @promptandpros​ @ladyreapermc​ @honeychicanawrites​ @yespolkadotkitty​ @chamomilebottom​ @deathonyourtongue​

[bereaving]

You definitely don't need to apologize for that 😆 I do that too...

For me it's different cause I love the horror genre. Like not this random, boring clichee sort of horror but this really subtle and deep horror like in Hill House. I'm a huge fan of it. For me it wasn't really important what's it about, I just wanted to continue this anthology.  

A lot of people say that honestly 🤔 it's different when you watch Bly first and then Hill House. But they both have a lot of similarities and I love that. 

She is! And it's for sure that most of the time where people were going through a traumatic childhood, they turned out to be assholes. Like we have an example right next to Jamie on the same show - Peter. He went through that as a kid and he turned out to be abusive and toxic, mostly. So it's great to see that there's a different way to go with that or to deal with everything Jamie had to deal with as a kid and how she turned out to be as an adult.  

So yeah that's really nice to see that people aren't the way you first think they are by how they act, you just need to get to know them and we did after her fantastic speech. I can't tell you how often I watched that because its one of my favorite scenes in the whole season. She definitely is one of the most important characters on the show. It's also a beautiful reference to how a flower needs it time to bloom and so do people, like you said. 

I mean she's definitely holding herself back a bit, and she tries to wrap her flirting and overall conversations with Dani up with humor. I think that's a great way of showing someone you really care about them without being too forward. So yeah I agree with you on that she would make a move if she'd be completely sure that's it okay for Dani too. But she would definitely do it in a Jamie - like - way 😂 like acting all cool and being funny yk 

Dani is bold af 😆 like she has shown us that so many times and it is refreshing to see. Cause if I'm being honest I didn't think of her that way when I first saw her. I thought she's cute and all but when I first got to know her backstory a bit I immediately changed my mind. Also the scene she had with Henry at the bar was bold af, I'd  have never done that for sure 😅

And then everything that happens around her at Bly and with Jamie, no doubt at all. 

Haha I had to laugh when Jamie said "who the hell knew" 😂 that was awesome and also gave Dani a feeling of relief. That was the first time she expressed her feelings, her real feelings, to someone she likes so much and no one blamed her for that.

I guess you can see it both ways. I hated how they decided to end it, like they just gave us all and then in the end they took it all away 😪 just seeing how Dani sacrificed herself and then no one even remembered her and she just has no choice but going to Bly again and die there, it was so hard to watch and to accept. And there's Jamie,  alone, with just the memories of Dani and she keeps waiting for her to return till the end... that's just heartbreaking and I need to hold back myself from crying every time I even think about it. 

It is a masterpiece, no doubt, but I just wish they would let them finally be happy for the rest of their days.

Yeah that's the thing when you watch Bly first I guess 😅 I knew Victoria will be in season 2, too. So I wasn't as surprised about it, but the fact that she played Nell just makes it change a bit. She nails playing those characters with real struggles and she brings them to life in a way I've never seen anybody do it 💯 her microexpressions are so spot on, like I don't even know what to say about it. These two characters are stucked in my head too. Dani a bit more than Nell but that's just because it's so long ago when I watched Hill House. 

I mean definitely! I hope Amelia stays on the horror path that would be great for me 😂 also same here, I won't watch YOU I don't know why but it's probably the show in general seems to be not really my thing 😕 unfortunately I have to say...cause i don't get to see Victoria

I really hope they bring them both back to The Haunting Series, I'd love to see Amelia back there and Victoria too 👌 but I guess we have to wait a long time for that 

We goin’ under the cut again because this one is also long, my friend haha

A horror two-timer such as myself really doesn’t have any other opinion other than the ones I’ve seen: Bly is and feels more gothic, whereas Hill House is more... I guess classically horror. They are both fantastic, and tbh I had no idea this is what horror does. I’d never looked into horror as a way of expanding the story, and Mike and his team had done that beautifully with The Haunting. Hours after I’d published the ask it occurred to me that the answer was so engrossed with Dani and Jamie that I’d completely forgotten to write about Peter lol whoops. He and Jamie are really two opposites of the spectrum. And in episode 7, I get that the whole deal for that is to get a better insight into his background, and what shapes him and what made him the way that he is. I enjoyed it as a casual watcher, and I liked OJC’s portrayal of him, but to be completely honest, I left that episode with very little added empathy for him. I’ve seen people like him enough both in real life and in fictional portrayals. I know what it’s like to be in the presence of people like him, and it is not in any way pleasant. So yeah, Peter, as this post so eloquently put it, can choke.

Jamie on the other hand... 🥰 Have I mentioned I love her? Lemme just say it again, just because.

Re: “I’m so glad you stayed” scene: That whole tracking shot... ugh, it just gives me goosebumps. I have seen it more than once and every time I need the scene for GIFs or anything, I’d always watch from the moment Owen’s car drives away. These two smol wives own my heart and my soul, and I love them a lot a lot.

Re: the ending Completely understand where you’re coming from, and it’s not something that I can casually think about or even try to sit with without some sort of mental preparation -- like taking a deep breath before you go for a deep dive. It still hurts, I still get sad and cry about the way their story had to end. But, that being said, to me it doesn’t feel like a disservice to their journey. It wasn’t done just for the sake of dramatization, or to show any kind of... hidden morality message, or anything like that. There’s no agenda to the story, is maybe a more succinct way of putting it. Just like any other couples we would see on screen, it treats them with respect. I think we all wish, deep down inside, that they would be able to shake off The Lady and live their best lives, but... I don’t know. Personally, I don’t think it would’ve stayed or created this big of an impact if they were to just ride off into the sunset together. 

Another thing to add is how good Bly is at exaggerating and amplifying aspects of real life and making it to be an element of the story. Some people forget you, some people will always wait for you and want to be with you. Some things, you do without thinking and it becomes a habit. Sometimes you lose yourself. Sometimes you’re stuck in circumstances or places you don’t really want to be in, but have to due to obligations and responsibilities. Some places really do have a pull of their own. Sometimes people love wrong, and it consumes you. Sometimes people love right, and it saves you. Maybe that’s just me and my takeaway from it, though. Last time I said Bly has changed the course of my 2020, and by that I mean that it’s taught me to have feelings again, to re-examine things, to care. And I just... love this series. Sadness and all.

MOVING ON 😆 I bow to Victoria. Ari ( @camhowes ) was the one who encouraged me to watch Bly in the first place, and so naturally once I started Hill House I messaged her and said, “I can’t believe Dani and Nell are played by THE SAME ACTRESS???????????” My freak out over her is not over yet, and I am begging anyone to let her be in all the things. I’ll fucking watch it (again... other than You) The way Nell breaks my heart... One of my friends who’s been a long Hill House champ has repeatedly said to me that Theo is the most fascinating sibling, and while I agree to a certain extent... Nell has my heart.

When it comes to Netflix’s You... to be completely blunt, a story that is pitched as “stalker man show, he kills people” is just not gonna appeal to me in general. No offense to anyone but there are just too many men I do not give a squat about. I don’t know if my resolve with this show will change. There’s been a couple sets of Love Quinn that I’ve seen (when she goes to the market in a beanie, or when she’s cooking and baking and drinking wine, or when she apparently went full on revenge baking mode) that are intriguing and is chipping away at my resolve, but... yeah, for the moment, I’m staying away from that series.

And I’m just gonna put a thought out into the universe, that if Miss Amelia Eve is hiring anyone to help her with her dog-walking business, I am available and can start ASAP.

[swiftlymoniquesblog]

New Orleans Square- Peter Parker x Reader (Requested)

Prompt by @cyrusandhiscollaredahirts: Reader is a Disney fanatic and they get lost in New Orleans Square as they look for food. The reader helps him and they end up falling in love.

A/N: I actually am a HUGE Disney fan myself and the last time I was at Disneyland was for my 21st birthday. My Mom went with me and we had dinner at NOS so this was a fun one to write!

***** DISCLOSURE: I do NOT own any rights to Disney or anyone affiliated with the movies or the parks. The lyrics are STRICTLY used for the purpose of entertainment for a work of fiction

Warnings: Fluff, slight panic attack, minor injury

Word Count: 2034

Masterlist

Going to Disneyland was supposed to be fun but it turned out to be a disaster! You were with your school for a class trip but you were miserable. You managed to forget to wear sunscreen so your skin was burning as you stood in line for rides. Of course, all the lines were unbelievably long and you hated standing around, waiting. Then, a little boy had a complete meltdown in front of you and his anger, he kicked you as hard as he could in your leg. You ended up hobbling around for a while until you couldn’t stand it. You begged to be seen by a doctor or someone who could help with the pain. 

“Alright, alright, y/n, we’ll ask someone to see if there is any place here that help with your leg.” Your teacher said, growing frustrated with your constant whining. 

Finding a worker, they point you into the direction of the nearest medical facility that dealt with minor injuries in the park. Walking into the office with your friend, you grew annoyed with the Mikey Mouse emblems that littered the whole room. 

That stupid grin. You thought to yourself as you hoped up on an examining table. 

“Okay Miss Y/L/N, let’s take a look at your leg here.” A doctor (if you could even call him that) said, grabbing your leg and hoisting it up on his knee to get a better look at the injury. 

“Ah well, you got a nasty gash there. How did this happen again?” The doctor asked. 

“Some stupid kid kicked me.” You say, rolling your eyes at the memory.

“Well, he must’ve hit you with something harder than his foot because he cut you deep.” 

“Oh great.” You say sarcastically. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll just clean it up, stitch you up, and you’ll be good to go.” 

You hiss as the alcohol hits your open wound and squirm in pain as the needle would push into your skin and out to sow you up. Once he was done, the doctor wrapped your leg with white gauze to keep any bleeding from spilling out of the stitches. 

“There, good as new.” He helped you stand and gave you some ibuprofen for the pain. 

“Go see your doctor when you get home but you should be good until then.”

“Thank you, Doc.” Your friend said, nodding at him as you left the office. 

“Well, this has been quite the trip, eh?” She said, nudging you slightly.

“Tell me about it. I just want one good thing to come from this lame excuse of a vacation.” 

As you joined up with the rest of your school, they were wandering around for a place to eat. Walking into New Orleans Square, you noticed a young man, around your age, wandering around like he was lost. You kept your gaze on him, focusing on whatever he was doing and then it hit you. You had seen him before and you felt your heart race; Peter Parker. He was the single most popular student in all of Queens, as the star student of the Midtown School of Science and Technology. He was smart, considering he landed an internship with Stark Industries a few years ago, which landed him his popularity. Someone like him would never notice someone like you but you figured that was back in Queens. This is Disneyland, ‘where dreams come true’ right? 

You split from your class and heading over to where he was but he wasn’t paying attention to you. You clear your throat and he whipped around to look at you. 

“H-hey, are you okay? You look lost.” You spoke, afraid of speaking to him but he just grinned at you. 

“I am. I was with some….friends, but we got separated.”

“Well, I’m here with my class so I think you can join us if you’d like.” 

“Thank you. I think that would be cool. I’m Peter.” He extended his hand to you and took it.

“I’m Y/N.” You shook his hand and he gave you a look. “Y/N? From the Collingswood School of Performing Arts?” He asked.

“Yes. How did you know that?” You ask. 

“Oh, I uh, my school has helped set up a show at your school.” He stuttered over his words, which seemed odd to you.

“Oh, and was I there?” 

“Yeah, it was a dance competition and you were one of the contestants. I uh, stopped helping the setup and saw you. You were really good.”

“Thank you. Didn’t think you’d ever notice me.” 

“You were hard to miss.” He said causing your cheeks to brighten red. 

“Hey, Y/L/N!” Your teacher called and you rushed back to the group, Peter close behind.

“Can we eat here? We’ve been walking around for half-an-hour looking for something to eat and we’re all getting tired!” One of your classmates said as everyone cheered in agreement. 

“Fine, we’ll eat here.” Your teacher led the class inside a restaurant; The Blue Bayou. 

“Oh, I love this place! It’s like you’re sitting right in New Orleans and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride goes right through here!” Peter exclaimed to you as he dashed inside. You laughed seeing him act childish.

When your host escorted you to your table, the class oo’d and aww’d at the scenery, however, Peter had another idea. 

“Come with me.” He whispered to you before he walked off. You looked at your friend, who just motioned for you to go with him. 

You soon began to panic, as you couldn’t find where Peter had gone. You looked all over the restaurant, back to the front doorway and outside but no Peter. Just then, someone tapped you on your shoulder, it was Mickey Mouse! 

“Mickey!” You shout, wrapping your arms around the character. 

He looked at you and extended his white-gloved hand for you and you took it. He led you to a hidden location, up a narrow hallway and stairs, up above the restaurant. You were confused and assumed he was a serial killer hiding in a Mickey Mouse costume, but all your fears melted away when you saw Peter, standing next to a table. 

“Thanks for your help, Mikey.” He said, fist-bumping the mouse before he headed back the way you had come.

“What are we doing up here?” You asked as Peter took your hand once again and brought you closer to him.

“Well, I heard from your friend that you weren’t having a good trip, so I spoke with the staff of the restaurant and asked if it were possible for us to have dinner up here. They agreed and here we are.” 

“Peter, this is…this is unreal. But why me? Why bring me up here? I thought you like MJ.” You heard rumors that Peter and MJ were an item; gossip spreads fast in Queens. Why would he be into you; he hardly knew you.

“Oh no, MJ and I are just friends. I told her I was really into this one cute girl from Collingswood and I wanted to get to know her better. Luckily, I happened to run into her at the happiest place in the world, and I get to be romantic with her like I’ve always wanted to. I just hope she lets me treat her to a magical night.”

You couldn’t find the words to say, so you just threw your arms around Peter’s neck, holding him close. 

“I like you, Y/N, so much.” He says as he helps you settle into your seat. “Please order whatever you’d like; it’s on me.” 

“I can’t let you pay for all this, Pete.” 

“Eh, sure you can. Plus, I already paid ahead of time so you can’t argue with me.” He smirked at you but you went along with it. 

After you two ate, he stood up and offered his hand again. 

“Boy, you surely do that a lot, don’t you?” You joke, looking at his hand.

“Do you trust me?”

You nod your head and put your hand in his as he quickly pulls you to him. 

“Hi.” He smiles and starts swaying to the music with you.

“Pete, I’m not dressed for this.”  You looked down at your shorts and tank-top combo; not the best choice for dancing.

“Nonsense. I got you. Just follow my lead.” 

The music to one of your favorite songs as a kid began playing; from a Disney movie nonetheless. 

Take my hand, take a breath

Pull me close and take one step

Keep your eyes locked on mine

And let the music be your guide

Won't you promise me?

(Now won't you promise me?)

(That you'll never forget)

We'll keep dancing

(To keep dancing)

Wherever we go next

It's like catching lightning, the chances of finding

Someone like you

It's one in a million, the chances of feeling

The way we do

And with every step together

We just keep on getting better

So can I have this dance?

(Can I have this dance?)

Can I have this dance?

You felt your cheeks heat up as Peter orchestrated the dance from High School Musical 3. It was super cheesy but you didn’t care. You were here with Peter and the rest of the world melted away. 

Take my hand, I'll take the lead

And every turn will be safe with me

Don't be afraid, afraid to fall

You know I'll catch you through it all

And you can't keep us apart

(Even a thousand miles can't keep us apart)

'Cause my heart is wherever you are

At this point, every eye in the restaurant was on you and Peter, phones were out recording or taking photos of you both and you grew embarrassed. 

“Don’t be embarrassed, my love. This is our moment and no one can ruin this for us. I’ve wanted to tell you how much I like you for a while now and I felt a big romantic gesture like this was appropriate; something you deserve.”

It's like catching lightning, the chances of finding

Someone like you

It's one in a million, the chances of feeling

The way we do

And with every step together

We just keep on getting better

So can I have this dance?

(Can I have this dance?)

Can I have this dance?

It felt as though you were flying, living out a childhood fantasy with one of the most amazing guys you’ve met.

Oh, no mountain's too high and no ocean's too wide

'Cause together or not, our dance won't stop

Let it rain, let it pour, what we have is worth fighting for

You know I believe that we were meant to be! Oh!

It's like catching lightning, the chances of finding

Someone like you

It's one in a million, the chances of feeling

The way we do

And with every step together

We just keep on getting better

So can I have this dance?

(Can I have this dance?)

Can I have this dance?

Can I have this dance?

Can I have this dance?

The music faded away and it was eerily quiet as Peter captured your chin and pulled you in for a kiss; the entire restaurant erupting into applause and cheers. 

“Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked, pressing his forehead to yours, eyes boring into yours. 

“Yes, please. A million times, yes.” You kissed him again before grabbing your things and heading back down with the rest of your class. 

Your friend squeals and hugs you before saying quietly, “I knew this trip would get better for you.” 

“But I never expected this!” 

“I did.” She says. 

“You knew about this?” You ask your friend, to which she just nods. 

“I caught him watching you at the dance competition a few months back, knew he liked you and helped him plan this whole thing.” 

“Ah, I love you!” You hug your friend before you take your place back at Peter’s side, fingers intertwining with his. 

“I can’t wait to get home and show you off to May and Ned and MJ and Mr. Stark!” He beamed as he spoke and you couldn’t help but be excited to go home too. 

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