#big bro asher

[asherthehimbo]

anyway little rant(?) under the cut feel free to ignore

when I say im San and Changbin I MEAN IT

I don’t think you guys understand

like they're ME, IM THEM, our personality's, fears, mottos, goals, values are all so similar, it's actually terrifying ngl. Like SO much of my life was things I couldn't put into words until they verbalized them and I was like "BRO THATS LITERALLY ME WHAT"

[iwaasfairy]

pls the way I was just casually playing lads and then got fucking blindsided by caleb and the absolute cest horniness that overtook me I can’t escape the huge strong devoted big bro that can’t live or breathe if he doesn’t have his cute lil sis carnally

tw yandere caleb, possessiveness, blood, a lot of niichan calling, siscon, I hc that reader calls him Mahiru growing up n Caleb when he leaves for uni and DAA so I use Mahiru here

It’s all too easy to feel like a big shot when neighbourhood kids flock around you. The swingset still glitters with dangling raindrops after the downpour, and laughter and childish discussion echoes the playground for a whole block between the raised skyscrapers.

“He’s coming again,” Nene giggles under her breath, air blowing through the hole where a tooth sat a few weeks ago, and her ponytail bounces. She hoists herself back onto the monkey bars while looking your way. Some of the other girls chat among themselves, and though they pretend not to look, even at age nine they seem to know. You hear your name fall between giggles.

It’s quick.

“Hey.” A rounded pebble hits your spine, and you turn.

The taller boy, stout, with soft freckles and a bit of a mean look stands before you for the nth time this afternoon. His words won’t make it clear, but he can’t seem to leave you alone. You place your hands on your hips, and sneer at him. “What do you want, Asher…” Gran told you he’s going through a phase, to be gentle. Niichan told you to punch him between his eyes next time he gets on your case.

You’re not sure you can do either of those. Asher’s eyes flick around as he shuffles a bit closer, under the eyes of some of the other boys— and a dusty rose tints his cheeks. “We’re gonna play house now. Since you’re not busy, you gotta play the mom.” He mirrors your pose, and his hands land on his hips. “I’m the dad, and they’re the kids.”

—Nene giggles from her elevated position, before yelling something out. “We don’t wanna play with you, Asher! You only play rough, and girls don’t like that.” Her smile is so wide that it’s almost Cheshire. “And besides, you should ask a girl. Not just order her around. Right?”

Right. You don’t say it, but your eyes stay on the boy as his face gets brighter, and he starts fidgeting with his clothes. “I’m playing with my friends,” you end up saying, as Asher steps into your space, and his rough hand grabs onto your wrist to yank you his way. That, and Mahiru nii is running around with his own friends somewhere. He already told you not to engage. It wouldn’t end well even if you ended up playing nice.

The blond’s basically sunset pink in the face, and though he’s holding onto you, you can tell he’s trying his best to be gentle. “Just play with me- with all of us. Don’t be like that.” He stares down his nose at your defiant eyes, and raises his nose. “If you don’t I’ll pick you up and throw you in there.” The sandpit. Rude.

“My brother will punch you if you do,” you snap back, as you pull your hand back. He doesn’t let go though, hand now trapped between your arm and chest.

“Just leave her alone, Asher.” One of the other girls chants from behind you. The longer he holds your arm, the hotter your face grows. Then one of them lets out a laugh. “We know you wanna play with her because you like her.”

The change on his face happens in slow motion. His eyes flick wildly over your face like he can’t settle them anywhere without more embarrassment, so he lets go of you as if burned. “I wouldn’t ever like you! You girls are all annoying, I was just joking around!”

“Asher’s in love!” Nene squeals out over the whole yard, and he gets a look in his eye that tells you to get out of the way. 

“Shut up, Nene! I’m not! I’m not in love with her at all.” You go to run back to your friends as they all squeal and chatter, and the muted blond grabs one of your pigtails to yank you back, hard.

You land on the floor, dirt and sand on your hands— and tears spring up in your eyes. But before you can cry out as you look back up at him, a larger body’s already flung him to the ground and gets on top of him to pound a fist right onto his brow.

It’s harder than you landed. You’re pretty sure it’s much harder than is needed, too. The sharp thud is followed by another, and another, as the playground goes quiet. You can’t even see the boy who hurt you under Mahiru’s bigger form— older, stronger, he’s already started to grow up while Asher definitely has not. Adrenaline courses through your veins, and the tears clog up your throat.

Only when one of the older kids who’ve joined from the street pull Mahiru back by his collar, does the assault stop. “Hiru, I think- that’s enough.” Mahiru’s heavy breathing makes way from the soft puffs of breath coming from the younger boy, who’s bloodied face starts bruising an angry red almost instantly, and gasps and hisses sound out.

He’s flattened to the grass with no movement. 

The pained looks come from the older boys most of all, as they straighten your niichan up. When he turns to you, he’s stuck between chewing you out and putting on a smile. He kneels before you to take your hands in his. “Told ya’ to punch him between the eyes next time he tries to talk to you.” The chastising tone doesn’t fit the mood that’s overtaken the playground. But he doesn’t hesitate to brush a thumb along your cheek. “Are you not too badly hurt? C’mere, let niichan see.”

His knuckles are split and bloody as he cups your small hands in his, and starts dutifully dusting them off for you— as his friends only grimace. Your shock doesn’t fade when he hoists you up under your armpits, nor when he pulls you into his chest to place a kiss on the top of your head. “Think you’ve had enough fun for today, ‘mouto.”

He smiles brightly to the young girls frozen on the swing, then at his own friends. “I’m going to take this one home first. We can hang out again later!” That’s that, before he picks you up and puts you onto his hip without another word, and your shaking hands are forced to link around his neck. “Don’t space out. Let’s go.”

…

The streets even out into less busy districts as he walks, lets you rest your head into the crook of his neck, your breaths evening out. You’re not sure what to say, only that it’s gone quiet since all the prying eyes followed you both down the block.

“Will Asher die?” you end up asking, and Mahiru’s steady breathing only breaks for a slight exhale through his nose, before continuing.

“Bad kids don’t die so easy.” His brows furrow ever so slightly, before he turns his face to yours so that his cheek is against your nose. “Shouldn’t you be a bit more worried about yourself?”

His dark head of hair rubs against yours with how close you two remain, until your lack of answer makes him continue. The swaying of your legs as he walks is easy, and it’s this that makes your tummy feel a bit queasy. You don’t have a scratch on you. Mahiru always makes sure of that. Your lips purse, and you tense against him. “He’s my friend. The girls were teasing him, that’s why he did that.”

Big brother stops walking. His long arms move from the small of your back where he’s holding you against him to your thigh, and he looks at you. Now nose to nose, heat climbing onto your cheeks. You’ve always been close, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t still make you nervous. Mahiru doesn’t seem to get nervous for anything. His eyes sink deep into yours as he talks. “I don’t like your friends then. They put their hands on you and pull you and touch you. You think I’m stupid?”

“No.”

He lowers his eyes to your throat, then leans into you. Mouth to your neck, it tickles. “I was pissed at him because I know what he wants. Soon enough they’ll start asking you to kiss.” You can’t help it, you flush. Heat travels to your nose and cheeks and ears, and of course, Mahiru notices.

“What��s that reaction?”

“Nothing! I don’t have a reaction.”

The shades of brown and purple in his irises get a darker tint as he lets out an unamused noise. The tension makes you all jittery and weird feeling, and you start struggling a little to stay in his hold. “You’re my sweet, innocent little imouto. You’re not kissing people yet, right?”

“I’m not kissing anyone, niichan! Only you.” The silence is filled with your breathing. “Even if they ask, I'm not going to do it.” His dark brows are laced together so tight it looks like it hurts, and it only takes a moment for you to lean in and give a polite peck on his cheek. He doesn’t relax until you make an exaggerated ‘mwuah’ sound and press your lips longer against his ear, nuzzling into his cheek. “Don’t be so mad, you protected me, right? I’m okay thanks to you, niichan. Love you.”

You hop off his hip to stare up at him, and take his hand in yours to lace your fingers together. “Let’s just go home, nii nii? You were right, I’m tired.” And something still plays in his eyes, but when you pull he follows. That’s enough for now. You don’t want to get Hiru nii in trouble. He’s just protective.

[moronkyne]

Big and Random Redacted Headcanon Post. Again.

Character list; Sweetheart, Milo, Asher, Bestie, Sunshine, Angel, David, Gregory, Dear, Lasko, Geordi

❄️ Sweetheart is the type of person to go and tell Milo to feel their legs after theyve shaved them. Just slams their leg on the desk no matter the mass of it. Milo will just be scrolling through his emails or playing with David and Asher and BOOM. Smoothest leg youll ever see.

💗 Angel buys David flowers FREQUENTLY. It stuck with them that they were the first to get him flowers—Plus, the look on his face when he sees the new cluster each time? Bro is just “-////-”

🍇 Asher is. Too good at Guitar hero. Also his go-to song for it is Yellow hy Coldplay :)) Basic (..?) but a classic

🦋 I love to make parallels between Sunshine and Bestie, so. They shop(ped) at the same thrift store for aesthetic little candles. Sunshines decorates their room with it, Bestie uses them for shrines and Altars!

💝 Angel has been cheated on before—More than once too. They had just expected that to be a definite end for all of their relationships. They’d live it up with someone until they felt that feeling in their gut. Untik they met David. And even though things were a bit questionable to begin with, Angels insecurity left. And they never doubted their mates loyalty. Though early on they definitely had a fight abt trust and that. Thats was a tough one.

🪻Ive had this HC for a while but the most recent game bois audio sorta confirmed half of it? (left 4 dead w the pack) Anyways, Angel talks to themselves/an invisible audience while playing videogames alone and David Is Silent.

💜 Greg is. Active. I MEAN HOOLY LAWD, YOU CANT THINK OF HIM ON NOT WANT TO AT LEAST HOLD HIS HAND. WAAAAH hes either hella active or everyone thinks he is and hes NAWT. Which surprises his pack bc gyattdamn sir

🌸 Geordi with a service animal IS MY RELIGION.

🌀 D.A.M.N. has a community greenhouse and Dear is ALWAYS in there during their lunch breaks. Grading, checking emails, etc etc. Eating their little sandwich—Sometimes accompanied by a friend. Lasko strolled by them once, before they properly met, and OOOOOHHH he was RED when he saw how beautiful they looked surrounded by the gorgeous and colorful plants.

[brodygold]

Boyfriend, BROfriend

Asher sulked as he laid back on the couch, too upset to notice the television was displaying static. His girlfriend had just dumped him that morning and his best friend Thorn was completely MIA. He'd gone to investigate the local sports legends, the "Gold Troopers" or something like that. Thorn often lived up to his name, being a thorn in Asher's side, but he still wanted his support in these rough times. Asher had invited him over to rant about chicks like they usually did after a breakup but he hadn't even read the damn message. He'd already drunk several cans of cheap beer waiting for the guy and was starting to feel the buzz.

Asher was pulled out of his buzzed state (well, slightly at least) with a knock on his door. "Finally," he thought, "took the asshole long enough to get here." He threw himself off the couch and walked over to the front door.

Opening it, Asher could tell something was a bit off. Thorn's usual wild and spiky hair was tamed, giving him a sporty look.

"What's with the hair, man? Where's your wild side?"

Thorn let out a little laugh. "Oh, don't worry about that, bro. I still have my wild side. Just trying something new."

Asher looked Thorn up and down. Nothing else seemed off about him. Besides maybe him saying "bro." He still had that characteristic smirk on his face, and the leather jacket on him screamed "punk." He was too drunk for this.

"If you say so, man. Get in here so we can gripe about Maya."

"Thanks, bro. I got just the thing for you actually." He held up his hand, holding a golden DVD. "One of my new bros gave me something to help you get over your ex."

Asher looked at him suspiciously, his hands in his jean pockets. "What's a movie gonna do for me?"

"Trust me, bro. He showed it to me when I met him and it's almost life-changing in a way."

"If you say so. Can you put it in? I'm a bit drunk."

"Sure thing bro."

Thorn put the disc into the player, turning the TV off the static. In its place was a shiny golden spiral, drawing Asher in instantly. The gold swirled in his eyes, mixed with a bit of white and brown. Images of naked women appeared in the background behind it.

Asher lost himself in the spiral, staring at it mindlessly. His mind went completely blank. All he could do was stare at the spiral. Stare, and obey.

Thorn removed his leather jacket, revealing a shiny golden soccer jersey underneath with "Trey" on the back. He smirked looking at Ashter's blank stare. "That's it bro, just stare at the pretty spiral. You'll be a true bro soon."

Ashtor reached down into his jeans and started stroking, just as the spiral commanded him to. As he continued, his clothes started changing. His black t-shirt glowed gold, transforming into a shiny gold soccer jersey with his true name on the back. His jeans turned into a set of golden shorts, giving him more room to stroke as he pulled them down further. His wild and crazy hair got tapered down into a classy, sporty look that matched Trey's.

Ashton's mind was being rewritten at the same time, his old self going into his balls with every stroke. His name change was solidified first, the first piece of his new identity. The images of women changed into men stroking themselves just like he was, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He found himself admiring their forms and their strokes, eyeing the big packages. Thoughts of being with women and loving their bodies head to toe vanished completely. Only men would satisfy him now.

Trey leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Ashton could feel himself blush as he continued stroking. Memories of being with Trey as boyfriends, serving the Golden Army together both on and off the field. They sure knew how to party together in the locker room...

"Cum for me, babe"

The spiral finally ended as Ashton came, spurting his old self out onto the floor in front of him. Trey would be sure to clean that up later.

"Come on babe. We have practice in 30 minutes!"

Ashton looked up at his boyfriend and smiled. "Sure thing babe. Let's get going. But first..." He walked over, placing a hand on his shoulder and smiling a sinister smile.

"How about a quick round 2?"

[aimedis]

redacted asmr headcanons pt. 6

-angel definitely has one of those shirts that says ‘angel’ on it

-asher calls baabe sexy on a regular basis

-lasko has a super bad fear of horror films and games (will start crying)

-the pack played fnaf once and all you could hear was screaming from milo, tank, and asher and laughter from angel, sam and sweetheart (david and baabe literally almost fell asleep on each other) 

-lovely makes vincent tea and reads to him when he’s sad (*being pouty) 

-angel used to have an eating disorder (still reverts to old habits sometimes but is recovered) ((when they struggle with eating, david holds their hand and talks them through it))

-freelancer speaks french and makes fun of damien (in french) for being so poor at it all the time ((damien: "bro shut up?" freelancer: "do you know how to say that in french, huh?")) -(damien and freelancer are so siblings coded)

-darlin’ and sam slow dance around the house all the time (in the kitchen when sam’s cooking, in their bedroom right before they go to sleep, after they wake up, in the hallways etc.)

-freelancer is really good at acting like they’re sad when the boys tease them so they (huxley and dear) feel bad ((they just have to pout once and curl into themselves before huxley is hugging them and making the others apologize)) -(they're the youngest in the group so they get teased a lot) 

-sweetheart isn’t particularly known for taking care of themselves and whenever they complain about any health issue they’re having, david is quick to point that out (sweetheart: “my stomach hurts” david: “your stomach hurts because you don’t eat properly at the proper times or-“ sweetheart: “shut the actual fuck up david, I didn’t ask”)

-damien is such a shithead to everyone, even huxley and sometimes he forgets that huxley is shameless when talking back or “returning the energy” to people. damien will poke fun at him and act surprised when huxley starts attacking (tickling) him

-asher has a fear of needles but he got a tattoo in memory of gabe

-sam cried in darlin’s arms for hours after the inversion

-after the inversion, david flat out refused to let asher out of his sight until he was at home safe with his mate (drove him home when they couldn't pick him up, even when asher insisted he could drive himself home)

bonus +

-darlin’ is the only one who calls sam “samuel” 

-I just know kody reeks

-at random moments angel and asher would just be like “i can’t wait to get married” with little smitten smiles on their faces even before they got engaged (it’s too cute for anyone to give them shit for it) 

-asher's big sister was his favorite person for years (she's tied with david for second favourite after baabe) ((david sees her as the sister he never had)) -(think of asher and madelyn as the "i'm a big dog, i do big dog shit" older/younger sibling audio on tiktok)

[jypinreallifefr]

Redacted audio angel headcannons!!!!!!

(A bit of David)

•Asher definitely sent angel the minecraft movie trailer and said "BRO." Angel watched it and was utterly disgusted but they're gonna hate watch it

•angel played D&D when they were younger,still do but less and got David to play (David probably already played before and angel got real excited)

•angel asked David if they wanted to see the barbie movie with them and probably had to either drag him out to be in a light color of pink or he had to be 'convinced' to go watch it with them (they also probably saw it with milo,sweetheart,Asher,baabe,Sam and darlin and they were surprised that he wasn't wearing black)

•if you ever seen that one tiktok audio that's from Deadpool and its "Hi wade!" "Hi Yukio! It was nice for you to say hi and I said hi back" then that is definitely angel and Asher

•angel loves Chappell roan and probably played it when they were with David (he likes the songs)

•when their texting they probably use :3 XD :P :D D: :> :< :] :[ :) :( :O :C C: :/ :\ :| alot (or when they were younger)

•they probably like kpop (small fan or big stan,your choice) they probably like the groups straykids (my ult ofc) twice,ITZY,(probably) BTS and MAMAOO (they relate to the song taller then you)

•their style is probably either strawberry aesthetic,coquette,scene,gyaru (I think I spelled it right),downtown or acubi (your pick)

•they probably like cartoon shows like gravity falls, steven universe,amazing world of gumball and a hint of owl house

•on the topic of gravity falls,they definitely saw THE grunkle Ford edit and simped for him and they got oddly uncomfortable around sam because they're old (then told him about it and they laughed)

THATS ALLL BYEEEEEE :3

[tuerescringe]

Shaw Pack Headcanons:

(inspired by my friends! yet again!)

- Whenever Asher dies in a game due to lack of trying, he describes it as “playing with my meat out.” It’s terrible and instantly kills everyone in vicinity.

- Asher calls everyone but David a variation of “little bro.” David is instead given the wonderful title of “Big Dog.” He hates it.

- Angel plays Fortnite with Asher. Which sucks because they play on switch and it’s the worst possible way to play it. They refuse to touch the console simply because they are lazy.

- Baabe is a Glee enjoyer.

- Sweetheart has been begging everyone to play Lethal Company together because they find it absolutely hilarious.

- Milo is surprisingly not as adverse to the idea. He thinks the tiktoks that SH sends him of it are pretty funny. Actually playing it is horrifying though. He stays in the ship.

- David kinda adores Lethal Company.

- David tries to backseat whenever Angel plays a game that he likes.

- Whenever Darlin is gamer raging/jokingly insulting Asher, he responds with something like “You’re my friend and I care about you so much :) Did you know :)” It shuts Darlin up.

- Sam and David always take the lead when playing multiplayer horror games.

- Angel fucks with Roblox heavy. David absolutely does not get it.

- Asher does though.

- Milo had a soft spot for terrible medical dramas. His favorite is Grey’s Anatomy.

- Sweetheart watches it too but they get so stressed over the workplace atmosphere.

- David is a 60’s-70’s era anime enjoyer.

- Darlin’s top used emoji is the middle finger.

- Milo and Darlin are the same level of pussy when it comes to horror.

- Angel describes things as “yucky disgusting.”

- Sam and Baabe like playing chess together.

- Darlin constantly debates others on whether it not they could beat their faves in a fight.

- They are adamant on the idea that they could solo Gojo.

- Asher and Angel greet each other by going “Hey buddy!” in a strange little nerd voice.

- They all have little beaded bracelets. Angel got them for everyone during a trip to their hometown.

- Whenever David is explicitly affectionate towards someone besides Angel, they feel strangely frightened.

- Asher sends everyone slop content tiktoks and thinks they’re the funniest shit ever.

- His favorite currently is a clip of a Flash villain saying “and now I am the ruler of gorilla city and all of the gorillas will follow me.”

- Whenever someone says something mildly upsetting in the gc, Sam replies with “Jesus wept.”

- Sam’s top used emoji is “😕”

- Whenever someone says something stupid, or unfunny, Milo responds with “That sucks, by the way.” It immediately makes the recipient rethink their life choices.

[clown-boy]

emerson peters - 14 - he/them - gay

clowns, oddities, crochet, music, photography, and make up

You can normally find my dressed as a clown or in clown makeup

I’m autistic

Slytherin just like my big bro!!

@orson-does-good-ish is my big bro 💪

@alectocrow @prewett-twin @reagan-is-tired @whokilledevanrosier @malfoy-lu @starlight-starbright-thatsme @voldemortscult @nico-lovesthe-sun @nhia-moua @scattered-across-thesky @bones-and-edgar @devsmagicalblog @secretlifeof-asher @your-favourite-callie @hogwartsstudentconfidential @fawningamos @addison-caddel @luciagraham @thathojamie @veronica-davis @charlieandthehoneydukesfactory @gabriel-lumiere @king-ofthe-crop @gav-the-rockstar @kingalexanderthegreat @k1ndest-keeper @antoniadolohov @magandang-kaluluwa @vszabini @vidiadelafairy @fabian-with-an-f @lilyevansoffical @aelius-with-a-quill @anastasia-selwyn @averykissableguy @the-queen-bellatrix @hjonesworld @mystical-magical-me @emmelineandhervans @looneymoonyy @flyasaphoenix @flowers-of-narcissus @alicethekindone @wormy-loves-ch33se @tjsinclairofficial @james-the-amazing-potter @cas-not-the-band @marls-mckinn0n @lifeofthe-barty @little-king-official @mary-mcdeal @xeno-graphical @pandoras-nox

Sorry for repeat tags had to try to get everyone

[erial-c]

WEDDING AUDIO BAYBEY‼️

ohh bare with me this live reacting was all over the place

UGGHH SAPPY DAVID IS SO CUTE  . i may not be the biggest shaw pack fan but his character development will never cease to kill me

asher panicking 😭😭 AND CALMING HIMSELF DOWN because he didn't realize today was the day

baaabe being dressed already?? that's ao fucking funny they fr just let ash sleep (also a little bit of personaloty for baaabe  . the crowd cheers)

asher please your mate is already dressed  . dear god

i love that darlin out of all people wanted to make it so that the mates won't see each other until the ceremony . i know it's mostly because they wanted to drive the listener groups aka the "fun group" as they call it (listeners are bffies CANON!!!) but it's much funnier to think they hold onto that tradition for some reason 

"we're fun too, right?  ...right???" yeah asher whatever you say🤞

YEAASSSS SPEAKER BANTER I LOVE THIS SHIT SAOW MUCJ

"i don't even want to imagine what chaos those four are getting up to" THW SILENCE IN THE CAR???? erik was giggling and kicking his feet putting this in the script huhhuh

darlin being the one to make sure neither of the mates are peeking LMAO  . and sam calling them beautiful too. kill me actually

milo calling out asher's hair "are you trying to look like you got married in a wind tunnel?????? david don't let him walk out like that!!!!!!" further proving the headcanon that milo is the most well dressed of the shaw pack 

milo's nervous as shit  😭😭 i forgot he was gonna be the fucking officiant bro id be sweating fucking bullets too

"just maybe.. cuss a little less" great advice to tell milo out of all people  , sam

serious talk with the alpha and beta .. shivers

"why did you pick me?" asher  . asher  please.

"take the chance of saying something that's not perfect, if it means you get to really say what you feel" crazy  . i love angel (they are a listener character)) (they have no voice)) 

"you're the other side of my coin. you always have been" DAVID  . DAAAVIDDDD.

its good to see that david understands that while he know he made the right choice, he still understands the heavy responsibility he put on ash in assigning him to be pack beta

"you're too hard on yourself too" "well we had to have something in common other than destiny and smash bros, right?" KILL ME. stop being cute you loser

big three shaw pack hug  . ill kill myself

"i'm going to be up there lookin this good, people are gonna be confused on whose day it is!" "are they gonna be able to see you? do we get a step stool for behind the podium?" MILO DON'T LISTEN 2 THEM MY SHORT KING🤞🤞🤞 also beta boy😭😭😭😭😭

the effortless switch from banter to being all sentimental and emotional is crazy  . i hate these guys (lie)

RAAAAGHHH CEREMONY💥‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ YEAAASSSSS

yaknow while i did expect a few side characters/guest VAs to voice side characters , i don't think the audio feels that empty . it's just focused on the main characters and honestly im actually ok with it

not the laugh track😭feels like im watching a sitcom this is so funny

im assuming all the guests are empowered/informed  , because milo is calling the couples "mates"

YEAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSS THE VOWS‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ HERECOME THE WATERWORKS (mine and theirs🤞🤞)

girl nevamind the silence for baaabe's/angelangel's vows r still so silly

"the- the pairs of you. to each other. not all together. uh- congratulations  . uh- clap, everybody. now" no actually we're a polycule neow . canon because i said so

[milogreer]

wedding liveblog 💖

OK WEDDING TIME HERE WE GOOO

“you’re beautiful in the morning, all sleepy and cuddly” i’ll bite you david so help me god

courtney stopping mid-sentence to go “ ….. it just occurred to me he has to say vows.” LFHSKFHS

david’s laugh is literally like magic

ASHER’S SO NERVOUS AWW 🥺

driver darlin yeehaw 🫡 darlin trying to enforce not seeing your spouse before the wedding so they can drive “the fun group” YAAYYY PACK LISTENERS ILYSM

“asher, we spent your bachelor party playing destiny 2” HAHAHA

THE SILENT ASS CAR RIDE HELP MEEEE not even any fuckin words on the tape 😭😭😭 WHY IS THIS SECTION SO LONG

“fix your hair!” “it’s supposed to look like this!” “are you trying to look like you got married in a wind tunnel?”

screaming crying sobbing at milo being so nervous abt being officiant and sam reassuring him 🥺😭💕

DAVID FIXING ASHER’S TIE AND ASH ASKING WHY DAVID CHOSE HIM AS BETA IM GOING TO BE SICK !!!!

“take the chance of saying something that’s not perfect if it means you really get to say what you feel.” i need to go lie down. i can’t take him talking about gabe rn I CAN’T

THE OTHER SIDE OF YOUR COIN??? i am actually so fucking sick these two are unbelievable. “the one person i trusted more than anyone else. you made me feel safe at a time when i needed that more than anything else” ……….

asher holding onto this for so many years is so fucking sad bro ASHERRR I LOVE YOU :(

TRIO HUG YEAAAHHHH !!!!!

“being asher and david’s plucky sidekick for the greater part of two decades” MILO 🥺💕

i’m going to fucking cry at milo quoting gabe about the pack being a promise SHUT UP 😭😭

THE SILENT VOWS STOP LMAO it’s funny every time i can’t lie

david’s voice breaking after like four words i know that’s right. big ol softy. crybaby

YAYYY MARRIED CONGRATULATIONS TO THE HAPPY COUPLES 💖💖💖

[washa]

I listened to Friendsgiving audio and here’s my favourite personal comments/thoughts!

Lasko being late?? Again?? Honey you’ll be rivalling Asher at this rate 😭

Who is he talking to? Like which listener?? I’m just gonna assume it’s coworker. 

Oh nvm it is Coworker 🙏 Yes i’m very excited to meet them too. 

AWH YOU CAN HEAR HIS SMILE IN THE “I’m glad!” FWEHJJ

----------------------

HIII DAMIEN 

Lmfao why’d he sound so surprised to see Coworker? I mean who else would they be coming with?? Huxley???

“And you decided to come anyway, Blink twice if you need help.” Thanks Damien, I’ll keep that in mind 🙌

I like how he’s talking about Huxley like he’s some sort of spawn of devil destined to ruin his life when it’s literally his boyfriend.

It is for your own good, last audio you nearly burst a blood vessel Damien.

Why is he saying it like it’s a bad thing?? Relax babes.

GAVINNN HIII OH MY GOD OF COURSE THAT’S THE FIRST THING COWORKER HEARS FROM GAVIN

I love the sigh of frustration from Damien.

“Ooh, It’s been awhile since I was called the devil. Are you looking to make a deal wildfire?” GAVIN 

LASKO PLEASE, I’m so happy he’s more snarky.

Me cro wai vey. Of course Damien brings that up.

“No he’s not.” HELP THE WAY THEY BOTH SAY IT AT THE SAME TIME LMFAO 

God Damien is such a drama queen. Yeah let’s play some mario kart.

----------------------

Huxley. Is it black/grey or clear?? What do you mean is that steam or smoke???

Damien sounds like an asian mom, I’m crying 😭

“Huxley, Open the door.” You were meant to be mine, I was meant to be yours! (The girls who get it, get it. The girls who don’t, don’t.)

Damien please sit down, Gavin please shut.

I love how Coworkers first interaction of DamiHux is Damien pleading for Huxley to open a kitchen door. 

“No can do baby.” URGH STOP IT.

Wait, isn't this the same song that was playing when Gavin and Damien were talking about him and Hux in the coming out video. Livin’ On a Prayer is a DamiHux song canon. 

THAT’S WHAT I'M SAYING LASKO, THERE'S NO WAY IT ISN'T.

Huxley you softie, he’s probably gonna shove right pass you and go cook 😭

NOO NOT THE ROLLS, Nevermind he gets shoved out immediately. His whinging, god he’s suffering out there. He’s like a dejected puppy. 

“Oh my god he’s losing his mind.” Huxley, that's the love of your life out there. 

They’re both delusional. It will not be good in the end. 😕

Awh Huxley, yes we love baby steps. OH MY GOD WHAT. DURING WHAT NOW 😨

Tbf yeah Freelancer is the last person to worry about when talking about your sex life 😭

Ay no worries, Love ya. YES HUGSS. OH SHIT WHOOPS. 

----------------------

Yes, let's sneak into the kitchen like some sort of reboot version of Spy Kids. 

Damien’s pleading his case right now, Take a break bro, You’re going through the stages of grief rn 😭

“I’m beating you again Damien look at the TV come on.” Why did he say that so sexily, what the fuck 😕

HELP HE JUST OPENED THE DOOR RIGHT AWAY.

Awh Huxley is so sweet, Yes I do hugs you big baby 💕

“Lasko gets such a big smile on his face anytime he talks about you, And anybody that can make a guy as sweet as him happy is great in my book.” STOP IT, YOU’RE SO FUCKING ADORABLE OHKJLKJF

Freelancer? That’s me though?? HELP WHY IS IT SILENT 😭😭

Yeah I bet we’re hitting it off, can’t hear shit but yeah 😇

Bless Lasko, please do help him with the cooking.

Are we talking right now? HOW LONG IS THE SILENCE. 

----------------------

Gavin and Damien have such a funny dynamic, love em both.

“I think you and I have very different ideas of revenge.” “I bet in this case they’re more similar than you think.” Glaring at the HBA bonus audio rn.

I can’t tell if Lasko’s being truthful or just polite. 👎

Oh Damien approves, We’re in the clear then!

LMFAO OK?? Huxley uses a pickup truck canon. 

“And if you ever lock me out of the kitchen again, I’m setting your truck on fire.” “Awh, There’s my man!” MY LITTLE SRUNKLIES ADORABLE

For a second I thought Huxley was gonna say Mate and my brain just did a reboot.

Yippee a toast! Here here! OH MY GOD HUXLEY YOU’RE RIGHT.

WE’RE LIKE AVATAR 🙏🙏 

“We can make a really destructive Orgy?” LASKO LMFAO WHAT BABES YOU’RE LOVER AND BOO THANG IS RIGHT THERE. 

Actually no, Coworker probably fell in love with him more. 

Yes, I'm very happy to be here Damien.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

Redacted Incorrect Quotes Pt. ?

Haha you really thought my lazy ass was gonna work on WIPs? Nah. Have some redacted incorrect quotes based on tweets I saw, either on the app or screenshots of.

No I don’t care if the dashes are uneven.

Redacted Masterlist

----

Angel: *Flirting poorly with Davey at the grocery store* Hey so do you eat food often?

----

Sweetheart: Curious George is not a monkey because he has no tail. He is an ape. He will grow into a silverback gorilla and kill the man with the yellow hat in a display of dominance.

Milo: I’m literally just trying to read to Aggro.

-----

Milo: I love when kittens yell, but their heads are too big so they squint.

----

Guy: Roommate broke up with boyfriend that cooks for us. Excuse me while I go die.

----

Angel: In 1920 we took children out of the coal mine. In 2020 the most popular game on the market is minecraft. 

Baabe: Children yearn for mines.

-----

*3 AM*

No one:

LITERALLY no one:

Asher, in wolf form: I wonder if I can break the record with how loud I can lick my paw.

-----

Darlin: If civilization crumbles, I have a little flashlight in a drawer somewhere.

---

Sweetheart: Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmastime” is about friends practicing magic but when someone walks in they have to play it cool.

Milo: No. It isn’t.

Sweetheart: *starts singing* The moon is bright, the spirits up. We’re here tonight, and that’s enough. *whispers* This is the part where someone comes in. *Continues pointedly* Simply having a wonderful christmastime!

----

Angel: My husband gives people a thumbs down instead of flicking them off when driving. He reports that a thumbs down makes them a lot more angry.

----

Adam: I would be such a good “dead wife”. Like, can you imagine how good I would look in a dead wife flashback sequence? Someone make me their “dead wife.

----

David: As a kid I thought Simba was crazy for running away after the death of Mufasa. But now watching it as an adult, I get it. It did look pretty incriminating of him leading Mufasa to that gorge. Witnesses saw him singing “I just can’t wait to be king.” A persecutor could do some real damage with that conviction.

----

Honey: I don’t like the saying “don’t speak ill of the dead”. It always struck me as disingenuous. People are multi-layered. Yes, I did light up a room. But I also stole my roommate’s milk to make mac and cheese blackout hammered. Let’s acknowledge both sides.

----

David, giving a pep talk to the pack: For anyone feeling down, just remember Velveeta cheese has been on the market since 1918. If trash cheese can succeed, so can you. And for anyone who likes Velveeta cheese, I’m sorry. I’m sorry you like trash cheese.

----

Angel: Lying awake thinking about the time I ordered a giant magikarp plush from Japan but then got refunded because the plushie got crushed under a shipping container.

----

Asher, and maybe Guy too: I’m here if you need moron support. It’s like moral support but I’m stupid.

-----

David: If I have to throw a party for my pack, it will be breakfast. Not lunch. Not dinner. It will start at 8:30 am so there is a valid reason for no one to come and I can kick them out before noon because I only promised breakfast, not lunch. The introverts will win even if it kills me.

----

Milo and Ollie: My cat has no responsibilities, but all day he walks from around the house, from room to room, with this sense of purpose, as if he has a long to-do list of tasks no one asked for. Just a weird small furry dude going about his little cat errands.

----

Freelancer: Aww my microbiome fancies some high quality fermented foods, does it? A little kombucha perhaps? I don’t give a shit. I’m a megabiome, I do what I want. I’m having a fanta lemon. I’ll swallow coins.

-----

Lovely: I would be an awesome drug dealer. Like, can you imagine? *giggles* We don’t have coke, is pepsi okay?

-----

Freelancer: Math professors be wildin like “a man tossed a coin, find the probability of him getting a head?” BRO WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU GOT A H-

Huxley: I wanna reply back same to my data analytics professor so badly!!

------

David, at the pack solstice parties: I, myself, am understaffed at this time.

----

Milo with Marie watching Aggro for him:

-----

Asher: Fuck your zodiac sign, what button do you press when it says “press any button to start”

[sonseru2004]

WAAAH IDK WHY I STILL HAVE THESE PHOTOS ON MY PHONE BUT IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS FROM THIS BRO @.@

Fanarts in order - (↓)

1. Rei (ft. Davy Jones in the second photo) fanarts by Proti - (Aka my Italian Discord friend/Teenager+minor) = (2)

Pony Rei by Asher - (who's trans ftm teenager+minor)

Gacha edits+fanart by Tobey (aka my online big bro in discord before i'm redesigned Rei (aka my trans!fem db oc lol) in the updated gacha nebula = (2)

[return-to-twisted-wonderland]

Book 6: Idy

[STYX - ]

[Everything going to hell: Cerberus was shut down and Idia was completely locked out, what shocked him even worse was when the responsible party was revealed to be none other than Ortho. When Idia tried talking him out of it, he spoke a name.]

Idia: Did you just say "Idy"?! I don't believe it... That's impossible! I know what happened to Ortho that day...

[Idia was silent for a moment before he spoke again

Idia: Wait a minute. Only people with Shroud family DNA can shut down the Cerberus System... But you can't be him... Or can you? Is it...is it really you, Ortho?

Ortho: Yes. It's me, Idy. I made the guard dog take a nap.

[At that moment, Idia ran out of the room and headed to Tartarus.]

[Tartarus - The Underworld Gate]

Idia: The Underworld Gate is open... Ortho? Are you there?

Ortho: Yep, I'm right here. I've dreamed of the day I'd see you again. We can leave for real this time and go far away. But I'm sorry... It's gonna take me a while to get out. I'm much bigger than I used to be...

Idia:... Just leave it to your big bro.

Ortho: Okay, Idy... But, we're gonna need something before we get out of here.

Idia: Tell me.

Ortho: We're forgetting someone.

[Asher's Private Room]

[Asher was scared. One minute he was reading a book, then the next the power was out and he was in darkness. He wasn't scared for himself: He was scared for Idia, Ortho, and the Others. Asher's Mind thought about all the horrible things that could happen to them when the door opened and Idia stepped into the room.]

Asher: Idia! *Runs to Idia and hugs him* I thought you were hurt! The power suddenly went out and I couldn't reach you or Ortho and...

Idia (Wraps his arms tightly around Asher - Dangerously Calm Voice): Shhh. It's okay, Asher. Everything is going to be okay. *Breaks the hug* I need you to come with me.

Asher: What? Where are we going?

Idia (Smiles at Asher): Somewhere important. You trust me, don't you, My Persephone?

Asher: Of course, I do. I'd never doubt you, Idia.

Idia: Good, I'm glad. There's someone you need to meet.

[bassguitarinablackt-shirt]

chat this is my lovely boyfriend asher !! hes so silly and i love them very much :3 annies also quite pretty, and in my opinion she is also quite hot as well :3 apollo is so cool btw sols one of my favorite mutuals and i think hes one of my coolest mutuals and shhh im definitely not biased towards astro what gives you that impression haha stars just like. really awesome though. like in general ive looked up to caelus for a while methinks, comets just that cool yk? i really hope corbins life improves, i want the best for it to happen 3: crow deserves the best methinks . eros is not only very pretty, all of their names are really beautiful too !! helios would definitely be the first person i would go to to take suns names for my ocs (shh dont tell icarus that though /silly) jason is very silly and i would quite love listening to spark talking about whatever he wants :3 leos neos are also really cool !! id never heard a lot about neos, so seeing gears ones is really awesome to see :0 flames headcanons are really cool too !! i love seeing lukes posts :3 scrolling mars' blog in the mornings or whenever i have time is really nice, i love seeing nicos posts :3 i also love sending ghost asks, and i should really do that more i like talking to rot :3 xes very silly btw. but voids not sillier than me trust. octavian will never outsilly me (source: trust me bro) percy deserves the world btw like actually teal does i really hope kelps life goes well for mer :3 pipes is very fun to talk to, did i mention that trait of feyrs yet? if i have its bc its true. doves very fun to communicate with :3 i love thals btw. virtually giving xem a big forehead kiss rn bc. yk. renee rapp said to kiss a blonde an venus is blonde (planets definitely not ginger btw :3) (definitely not using renee rapp as an excuse to kiss ver no sirree :3) (i hsould probably check how to use wills fey an ve pronouns later because im not sure if im using them right but oh well :3) anyway yeahg. will. asher. nico. icarus. pipes. shes so cool and theyre very hot an i love dove :3

djskdjskjsjsofjdkdhdidjjdidisjsjjs ty siffrin ily mwah

[yourlocaltrashpandaxoxo]

Punch Out Men's Bracket OCs! (Special Circuit)

THE BOYS ARE BACK! And they've had quite the makeover! Name: Grimm Reaper/Asher Black Age: 18 Height: 5'2 Weight: 120lbs Nationality: ???? Position: #4 Special Circuit Record: 6-66 (6 KO) Stance: Southpaw (Left-Handed) "This creepy little gremlin doesn't really belong in the Special Circuit at all but his hulking brute of an older sister makes sure her little bro always gets what he wants. He's much smaller and scrawnier than the other men but he has a special trick up his sleeve. Fear. He adores tapping into people's darkest fears just to see what kind of reaction he gets. Under this angsty personality, however, seems to hide a very broken soul who yearns for attention." Name: King Kitty Age: 25 Height: 5'10 Weight: 138lbs Nationality: Chinese-American Position: #3 Special Circuit Record: 20-11 (12 KO) Stance: Orthodox (Right-Handed) "Don't knock this flamboyant young man down just cause he likes to wear cat ears and fuzzy legwarmers, King Kitty packs a surprisingly strong punch! He's a sassy, playful and slightly snarky young man who absolutely ADORES anything feline-related! He owns a cat café with his girlfriend that helps rescue sick and abandoned kitties. He's one cool cat!" Name: Honey Slugger/Seth Ahmed Mabrouk Age: 19 Height: 5'8 Weight: 129lbs Nationality: Egyptian Position: #2 Special Circuit: Record: 19-6 (15 KO) Stance: Southpaw (Left-Handed) "'Oh! What a handsome young princ- UUUGH!'. That's often how a first interaction between Honey Slugger starts out. He may be a gorgeous prince hailing from a glamorous palace in Egypt but he absolutely REEKS. He was unfortunately born with an unknown condition that causes him to smell incredibly horrid and he isn't afraid to weaponize the stench during a match. Nose plugs are highly recommended."

Name: Sad Clown/Claude LeBeau Age: 36 Height: 6'6 Weight: 165lbs Nationality: German-French Position: #1 Special Circuit Record: 22-16 (16 KO) Stance: Southpaw (Left-Handed) "A gloomy and very monotone performer from an unknown part of France, Sad Clown lives up to his boxing name as he is quite the mood killer when he wants to be. Not many people see what's underneath his mime make-up or even see him smile and it's unlikely they ever will. He appears to be hiding a rather traumatic event from his past..." Name: Rahi Moana/Raharuhi Wihongi Age: 30 Height: 7'4 (big boi :0) Weight: 213lbs Nationality: New Zealander (Maori) Position: Special Circuit Champion/Champion of the WVBA Record: 30-2 (28 KO) Stance: Orthodox (Right-Handed) "The mighty man-mountain from NZ, Rahi is an absolute unit of a man who reigns supreme over the men's bracket. Though he looks big and scary, he's a very jolly and gentle giant to most who meet him. He's also a big family man and values his family and boyfriend a lot. It's quite difficult to anger him but if you succeed? Be prepared for 7 feet and 4 inches of pure Kiwi rage to come crashing down on you like an unforgiving tidal wave."