#big blue badass robot who? I only see this badass here

[aecholapis]

They killed off Winnie D:

Who is to blame for her death? Who caused the star to erupt? We need to talk

She deserved better :(

[waddlewaddlewaddlewaddle]

Over my head (Miguel ‘o’ Hara x Reader)

Chapter 2

Pairing: Miguel x f reader!

Summary: y/n is a kind hearted nurse who’s life gets turned upside down as she get fired from one the most prestigious hospitals in NYC , desperate , she start filing job applications wherever. Coincidentally a stressed Miguel is looking for a nurse due to a big amount of spider people getting injured due to the surprisingly large amount of anomalies happening in the spider verse. What could go wrong is these two meet?

Themes:

Mutual pining

✎office romance (¿)

Hidden romance

✎Smut available as story progresses.

Dom Miguel x sub/bratty reader

✎Stubborn, Ill tempered Miguel.

✎ Angelic reader .

Medium slow burn.

✎I try to be as accurate as possible.

English is not my first language so bare with me.

✎badass stoic x sweet empath.

Wc:1.4k

Og spanish speaker so be prepared for steamy dialogue :3

(For the sake of storytelling spider society’s HQ is on earth 2099 :D)

See master list for previous or future chapters

°:. *₊ ° . ° .•

As Miguel scanned through the résumés that lyla picked out for him , all he could do is sigh and make uninterested faces at the computer. All the applicants seemed untrustworthy , not qualified enough , they lacked experience in Miguel’s eyes. He was worried there wouldn’t be a candidate who’ll keep their mouth shut about the spider society. He couldn’t handle the risk of a villain getting notice of their HQ.

Lyla watched as Miguel’s eyebrows turned into a worried knot as he watched the HQ’s camera as more injured Spider-Men barely hopped out of the portal only to plummet into the ground with their face beaten black and blue.

-“I know you need me to be obedient especially when you’re like this, but how about you check this application. It is a lady but”-Lylas sentence is cut short by Miguel’s interruption.

-“Looking at that application will only be a waste of time , I don’t want my men distracted with anything love like plus I need a nurse who can carry a 170 pound man in deadweight.”-Scolded Miguel as he looks at Lyla with a raised eyebrow.

-“Fine I’ll speak in your language then, the applicants a valedictorian, cum laude , graduated from Cornell university, certified critical care nurse , worked 3 years in presbyterian hospital and did plenty volunteering while finishing her med school and for the moment volunteers once a week. Such a goody too shoes , she seems kinda boring not gonna lie. But she will do.”-Lyla giggled as she sat on Miguel’s shoulder as she looked at his defeated face realizing you might just be the person he’s looking for.-“Plus I can ask for Spider-Man 199999 to make some robotic hospital beds!”

Miguel lifted the corner of his mouth in 1/8th of a smile, Lyla may be insufferable some times but the majority of time she was one of his best workers, if she recommended you it must be with a good reason

-“Call pavitr through the communicator and assign him to run a background check on y/n and have him follow her around for two days, if everything goes well assign an interview for Friday and have Jessica interview her.”- He said sternly even though in the bottom of his heart he felt some relief cause things were started to look better for him.

Just when he thought he could get himself a cup of coffee, his communicator started going off asking for backup in some random universe. He quickly sheathed his mask on and after receiving the coordinated portal hopped to help his co workers out.

°:. *₊ ° . ° .•

After receiving the good news of your interview yesterday you called Gigi with delight letting her know you got a job offer, a lot of the information is undisclosed but you’re happy you got the chance to work in what passionate about. All you hope is that you get some bonuses here and there and a decent pay.

You open your closet door after an intensive shower and grab a black turtle neck to hide your bruised neck after the accident, you pair it with a pair of white slacks and some black Mary Janes.

Lastly you do your makeup to your hearts desire and let your hair lay loose , you quickly lock up the door and run to the metro to head to the job interview.

At arrival your eyes take in a beautiful view, you gaze upon a Mediterranean cafe with gorgeous white detailing on the outside and through the window you saw some wooden tables surrounded by sky blue walls with woven straw lamps. As you entered the cafe there were few people in there , but the most distinguished was a woman with good looking Afro that decorated her head wonderfully, at closer inspection you also realized she was pregnant.

As she notices you staring at her she signaled you over to her table and invited you with her facial expressions to sit down.

-“Hello, you must be y/n. I know you didn’t upload a photo on your resume but something tells me it’s you.”- Said the mysterious women as if she hadn’t scanned and analyzed through 20 photos of you that Pavitr took of you while spying on you for the last 2 days.

-“Yes! I’m the one applying for the corporate nurse position , do you happen to be my possible employer?”- You asked with curious eyes.

The mysterious woman let out a big chuckle while resting her hands on her belly.

-“Me?! No god no”.- She said while shaking her head trying to die down her laughter- “You’re gonna wish I was though. Just kidding!”- after popping that joke she stood up straight getting meaning she was ready to talk business. -“Im Jessica Drew btw, so tell me y/n , what makes you stand out from other nurses and why should we hire you?”- Spiderwoman didn’t flinch while telling you her true identity, you seemed nice but most importantly you’re not from her earth so why should she care.

While you chatted with Jessica ;with each anecdote that came out of your mouth she was more sure that you were fit for the job , she knew you would take care of any spider person without any prejudice be it plushy Spider-Man or the ugliest of spider people. She really wanted to be confident in her decision because even tho it cost her to admit it , she cared deeply for her coworkers particularly a blond one. So after hearing about your time volunteering and a through personality analysis. You got the job.

After knowing her decision your eyes lit up and you could feel you spark return to your soul , the salary was beyond incredible ( mysteriously incredible) and you were to visit the company tomorrow to present yourself and to check out the infirmary so you can create a list of devices and supplies that you’ll need to have the place running in no time

°:. *₊ ° . ° .•

The next day news spread quickly of your arrival, many spider people were glad to have you in their HQ mainly because they didn’t have healthcare in their earth but partly also because a new face excited them , especially one without a spider mask.

In the meanwhile Spider byte and peni Parker started to work on a database like program that would be ready at your arrival , in this program all the spider people put in their medical history like allergies ,any prior diseases or special conditions.

As to your surprise the company you will soon be working in is located in the ugly part of town, you had to take a couple buses to get there but a long commute never bothered you, soon you arrived at spid-so.co which was oddly a… warehouse? Negative thoughts started to plague your mind about your job, maybe this job offer is too good to be true . But all those negative thoughts had to be blown away ;you couldn’t fuck up your only job offer.

So as you rang the doorbell you pulled out a pocket knife , hoping you wouldn’t need to use it , but as you hear heavy foot approach the opposite side of the door you decide squeeze your eyes shut and whip out the pocket knife in front of you to protect yourself from your possible kidnappers.

The next thing you feel is a strong hand wrap around both of your wrist; with enough pressure to keep still but gentle enough so it didn’t hurt. As you fluttered your eyes open your gaze stumbled upon a lamp post of a man, he was tan ; probably Hispanic. He had a strong face structure and a gaze that’ll send you running away but hair so fluffy that it cancels all the intimidating features out. This strange fellow looked so masculine to you even though he was just wearing some sweat pants and a compression shirt, a compression shirt that defined and highlighted his hunky shoulders and broad back that was miraculously help up by some shredded obliques and a tiny waist.

You looked at him with a wide stare wondering what the hell was going on, he was clearly not your average office worker.

Seeing your confused expression the figure in front of you decided to take the pocket knife from your hands diligently and open his mouth to let out a deep but stern voice.

-“Now who let you think you knew how to handle this?”-

[escape-from-arcadia]

Oooooohhh! 21 for the TOA AU thingy!

Tales of Arcadia Lunar Chronicles!AU

Book 21: Cinder by Marissa Meyer (#1 in The Lunar Chronicles)

Ohohohoho.

Ohohohohohohohoho.

Ohohohohohohohohohohohohoho!

You have no idea how excited I am for this one. I mean, technically, book 21 is Gathering Blue, but I just made a post about The Giver, so...shh. Let's just keep that secret between you and me...and all the other people reading this post...

We're rolling with the girl power here folks.

If you've never read the Lunar Chronicles, they're basically these books set in a futuristic sci-fi world and the main characters of the books are mirrored after fairytales. So Linh Cinder is a cyborg Cinderella (and she's also a cool mechanic!), Scarlet Benoit (hehe, Benoit!) is a badass Red Riding Hood, Cress is a hacker Rapunzel living in a satellite, and Winter is a rebellion leader princess Snow White. There's also Levana the "Evil Queen" with such an interesting and sad backstory like holy shit-

There's a society on the moon (and the people there have powers) and life on Earth is whack because of this deadly and mysterious disease that is spreading everywhere. Only the moon seems to have the resources for helping fight against it.

Gods I remember being obsessed with this series in middle school.

So let's get started.

I either put Mary into the place of Cinder or I put Zoe in. Zoe fits in really well with the personality/skills, but Cinder is canonically Asian and white-washing is big enough of a problem in this fandom. Plus, I want more badass Mary content here in the fandom. You saw that girl in 3Below; not only is she a social media powerhouse, she also knows how to swing a bat. So Mary takes the place of Cinder. (Plus, I think Zoe could do well as another main character in the Lunar Chronicles...)

I don't want to dive too deeply into spoiler territory, so I'll just say, Mary doesn't have her left hand and leg, and is a cyborg.

She loves technology and connecting with others (even getting to dress up pretty), but in order to make her own money, she runs a mechanic shop. This is also to "repay her debt" to her stepmother, who blames Mary for the death of her husband.

Mary constantly tries to cover herself up in decently clothing or robot grease to bring the least amount of attention to herself.

I really don't want to dive too deeply into spoiler territory, but let's just say Mary is not what she seems (even she doesn't know it).

She falls in love with the Prince of the Eastern Commonwealth, currently unnamed because what is life.

It is really hard to make this AU.

For the other female leads in the series:

Claire as Scarlet Benoit, searching for her missing grandmother and encountering the street fighter, the Wolf(?). I'd call Jim the Hunter, but that sort of ruins the fairytale...Maybe I'll call him the Troll? Oh, but that has poor connotations...

Zoe as Cress, living a lonely life in a satellite as an expert hacker.

Darci as Winter. Honestly, I see her as being a strong leader. (And her romance with Toby? A secret romance between the guard and the princes :')).

Morgana as Queen Levana. Holy shit, I loved her story Fairest.

I know that if we really wanted to play more into the TOA lore, Zoe may just be a better fit for Cinder and Claire even for Winter, but as above, I ain't about to whitewash or racebend characters. Besides, I think Mary and Darci need more time in the limelight.

If you send me an ask with a number between 1-36, I'll respond with a TOA AU based on the corresponding book on my shelf.

[just-my-fandom]

One Weakness (Hunk Garrett x Reader)

Reader is the white lion. Hunk and Reader are already together.

Summary; The reader has proven her worth on the field.

Request; Can I have a Hunk story with a badass reader and soft Hunk?

“OKAY, listen up, guys. The paladin code demands you put your team members safety above your own. A swarm of drones is about to attack,”

Your eyes look to the side, bayard clutched in your hand.

“You need to do everything you can to protect the other members of your team,”

You look up, watching as the group of small drones circled you and your team of six.

“Wait, wait, wait,” Hunk panics, as your free hand holds your shield up, “What’s going on?” Hunk flinches at the shield that pops up in front of him, “Whoa. Did you guys get one of these?”

“Get ready,” Shiro demands, as you squint your eyes and step back.

As soon as the drones begin shooting, Hunk ducks, the first laser bullet hitting Pidge so the ground beneath her gave out, dropping her through.

“Protect your teammates!” Coran calls, as Hunk purposely allows the bullets to hit him, ducking into the hole that appeared beneath him, “Or no one will be there to protect you!”

You allow your feet to back you up, back pressing with Keith’s, Shiros, and Lances at once. “You keeping up over there, Keith?” Lance calls, looking past you and to the red paladin.

“Just concentrate on keeping me safe,” Keith orders, Lance scoffing, loudly.

“Me? I own this drill. You’re the one who needs to concentrate,”

“Lance,” You hiss, threateningly, ducking forward when a drone flies by you, Lance lifting his foot so the bullet flew past him and hit Keith, almost instantly getting hit himself.

“It’s me and you,” Shiro stands, pressing his back to yours, your jaw clenching as you raise your bayard and shoot.

You flinch when the bullet flies over you and hits Shiro in the back of the head, nearly falling into the hole he dropped into yourself from balance loss. You heave a deep breath, raising your shield, eyes shifting to the six drones around you.

“This is your time, Y/N,” Coran announces, “Protect yourself. Your teammates are dead. Will you be joining them?”

You exhale a long breath, raising your bayard a third time before shooting, watching as it easily took out three of the bots. You jump back at the bullets shot at your feet, turning to slam your shield into another bot, ignoring how it rammed into the wall at your side and vanished.

You shoot, narrowly missing one of the two bots left, body jerking in order to dodge its bullet, before you shoot again, the drone exploding on impact. With a final heave, you shoot the last bot, watching as it dropped onto the floor then vanished.

“Excellent!” Coran cheers, as you drop your shield and weapon, both disappearing, “Thats how you do it, Y/N,”

“TO form Voltron, you must trust in each other. This ancient paladin maze will teach you that trust,” Coran pauses, watching as the holographic walls vanished, “Your teammate can see see the walls. But you cannot. So listen carefully; if you touch the walls you will receive a slight shock,”

“Wait,” You pause, looking up in the direction where Coran stood, “Who’s guiding me through?”

“Take two steps forward,” Keith demands, lowly, eyes staring at the map in front of him. You exhale in slight annoyance, rolling your eyes.

“Okay,” You raise an eyebrow, flinching harshly at the shock that sends through your body.

“Two steps forward,” Keith repeats, “Three steps to your right, then three steps that way,”

You clench your jaw, heaving a breath before moving in said direction, hand slightly in front of you as if you could feel the walls.

“Good,” Coran calls, “You’re putting trust in your teammates,”

“Trust is very hard to earn, Coran,” You snip, missing Keith’s roll of his eyes, “So nice try,”

“‘Maybe we should send Lance in here,” Coran hums, and you spin around, shoulder knocking into the wall so you were shocked, twice.

“Absolutely fucking not,”

“YOU have been working hard. Maybe it’s time you relax a little,”

You sip at the juice packet Coran handed you, leaning back on the training deck floor to stare at the ceiling.

“What are you doing?” Alluras voice leads you to look over, “You’re supposed to be training!”

“Just resting a bit. Cant push too hard, you know,” Coran informs, arms crossed.

“What do you mean, “cant push too hard”?” Allura snaps, “So far, none of you have been able to fully pass our tests!”

“Y/N did excellent with the program, actually,” Coran comments, and you send a wink when Lance looks at you,

“Well I’m glad one of you knows how to fight, but there’s six of you,” Allura hisses, “Six Paladins, and you can’t form Voltron without all six Paladins, and you can’t form Voltron if you don’t know how to fight! So get up, it’s time you all face the Gladiator!”

“WHOA, please tell me we’re not fighting that!”

“No, of course not,” Keith replies, sarcastically, shooting a harsh glare towards Hunk, “He’s here to bake some cookies,”

“Hey, I mean, I’m down for that,” Hunk nervously responds, yelling out when the Gladiator bot runs forward, Hunk lifting his gun before shooting, easily missing the attacker.

You raise your shield and block the four bullets, lowering your shield in irritation, “Hunk, sweetheart, stop trying to shoot me!”

“It’s not on purpose!” Hunk squeaks, grunting when the Gladiator swings its staff, knocking Hunk onto the floor.

You narrow your eyes, running forward with a raise of your bayard, shooting at the robot so it turned to you, it’s staff instantly swirling to hit you.

Keith’s sword is quick to block it, shoving the robot back as he slides in front of you, where you grunt and brush around him to shoot, “I had it!”

“Obviously not,” Keith snarls, Lance suddenly shoved into him so they both fell onto the hard ground, Pidge long thrown near Hunk.

“It’s me and you again, huh?” You heave to Shiro, who barely glances at you, before he does a double take, when the Gladiators staff hits you, hard, at the side of your helmet, knocking it off and feet behind you,

You stumble back, raising your bayard in an attempt to shoot, but the Gladiator is quick to get another hit at your face, dropping you onto the floor with a shout.

You lift your head as the robot powers off, Allura stepping up from behind it with a clench of her jaw, “That combat simulator was set at a level for an Altean Child! You’re not even close to working as a team, let alone ready to face Zarkon!”

You sit up with a hand pressed to your throbbing eye, other eye narrowing at the princess hovering over you, “I expected more from you, Y/N. Focus,”

You clench your jaw and roll your eyes, waiting for her to walk away before taking Shiros extended hand, letting him raise you to your feet.

“AHOY young Paladins,” You settle in front of the table in front of you, eyes staring at the plate of green goo, “I’ve whipped up a big batch of focusing food,”

“Oh thank God,” Hunk looks over at your exhale, your hand raising to rub your sore face, “I just want to eat and sleep for a million light years,”

Coran grunts in excitement, pulling out a remote with a press of the button, electronic handcuffs clasping around your wrists so they immediately connected to one of Hunks wrists, the opposite locking with Lances, “What-?”

“I saw a lot of solid individual performances today, but you’re still struggling to work as a team. So welcome to the final bonding exercise of the day,” Coran smirks, “You will all feed one another,”

“I think we’re bonded enough,” You grumble, tugging your arm to the side so Hunks arm pulled with yours, and you frown at him, “Hunk, if you wanted to hold hands, you could’ve just said so,”

Cheeks flushed, Hunk glares at Coran, “Coran, I want you to think about what you’re doing,”

Coran shrugs, and you sigh, eyes fluttering shut. You lift your spoon, scooping at your green goo before holding it out to your boyfriend of a year, “Say ah,”

Your arm jerks when Lance pulls at your other arm, your eyes narrowing at the blue paladin in a glare. “What?” Lance huffs, waving his own spoon in your face, “I’m hungry!”

“Well I can’t multitask, McClain, wait your turn!”

“This is ridiculous!” Keith complains, Allura groaning,

“Do Earthlings ever stop complaining?”

“Cant you just give us a break?” You snap, Hunk frowning at the flinch you give from the movement of your black eye, “We’ve worked hard today,”

“You do not yell at the princess!” Coran snarls, Pidge tilting her head,

“Oh the princess of what? We’re the only ones out here and you’re no princess of ours-!” Pidge is cut short when green goo hits her in the face, your eyes looking from her to Allura to see that Allura had been the one to flick the goo, a moments pause before Keith stands up with his plate,

“Go loose, Pidge!”

You laugh out in a squeal as food goo is suddenly thrown in every direction, your arms still connected to two of your teammates covering your head in defense.

A short glance between one another, and everyone begins laughing, your arms dropping as the cuffs are suddenly released, “See!” Allura calls, “You’re bonding as a team!”

Your eyes shift over to Hunk, watching as his eyes gleamed and then looked to you. You smile, widely, his face almost instantly matching yours as you lift your hand for a high five.

[trifle-of-doom]

The Hawk X Demetri Manifesto

Okay, here is the thing. Despite being well past my teens, there's a particular ship of Cobra Kai that has drawn my attention, this ship being Hawk/Eli x Demetri. When I first watched the show, I was actually more invested in the adult characters storylines than the teens. I immediately rooted for Johnny and Carmen, and I was always hoping for more interactions between them. But then I saw episode 2x05, in which the atmosphere between the Binary Brothers becomes way more dense, and that's when I started to see some potential for them. Not because I'm a deranged person who fosters abusive relationships, but because I immediately caught the hurt/comfort dynamic of the duo, which is something that works really well when it comes to fictional relationships. However, it wasn't until 3x10 that I said, "Ok, that's official, I need to see more of these two! I totally support them!" And I was quite surprised to find a fairly large amount of people who are very committed to this pairing, to the point it's caught the attention of the screenwriters/producers as well. Honestly, I don't know if the showrunners will ever have the guts to make them an official couple, and chances are their supporters will have to keep reading between the lines of their bromance, but in any case, here is my take on why Hawk/Eli x Demetri is an option worth to be considered.

#1 - The Bromance

If there's something that many years of navigating the Internet taught me, is that the main driving factor for fan-made ships is the presence of either a solid relationship based on mutual brotherly love or a bitter rivalry that may or may not flow into hate/obsession. If you consider anime fandoms, there are thousand examples that fit into either of these categories: Yugi and Jonouchi from the Yu-Gi-Oh series (yes, that's how old I am), Yugi and Kaiba from Yu-Gi-Oh, Sakuragi and Rukawa from Slam Dunk, Light and L from Death Note, etc. And our Hawk and Demetri fit into both categories. When we first see them, they are the stereotypical nerdy friends (possibly childhood friends?) sitting at the losers' table, who have no one else but each other. When Eli is at his most sensitive and fragile, you can tell he feels comfortable being with Demetri by the genuine smile he has on his face as Demetri is joking with Miguel at the canteen table. Through his sarcasm, the mouthy kid acts as a catalyst to deviate the attention from Eli, speaking for him, reprimanding Johnny when he makes fun of his lip and trying to make him feel safe. Besides, you can see a certain degree of frustration in Demetri when Kyler and his gang are harassing Eli, and he's unable to do anything to defend him. And they even have a jingle for their friendship with a robot dance, I mean, how cute is that? But of course, a solid friendship between two helpless nerdy guys is not enough to spark a ship to be rooting for. In order for the magic to happen, another key ingredient is needed, i.e. a little bit of angst. Which brings us straight to the next point.

#2 - The Angst (aka the Hurt/Comfort Dynamic)

Even though I never liked the Twilight saga or any similar urban fantasy young adult works, I can easily see where the appeal comes from; the attraction to a charming, dangerous person who could either protect you from any harm or crush you like grape. Although with different franchises, I wasn't immune to the bad boy trope either (Yes, I'm looking at you, my teenage self drooling over Grimmjow from Bleach). If we can appreciate the genuine, brotherly friendship between nerdy Eli and Demetri, the shift that Eli makes as he transitions into Hawk and becomes more aggressive and dominant gives their relationship a totally different flavor. Attrition sparks a certain tension that, in the viewer's eyes, could either flow into a brawl or into passion.

During the mall fight, Demetri comes to the realization that his former best friend is actually someone who can crush him like grape. We see Hawk intentionally harming him for the first time, and Demetri's heartbreaking expression as he drops the line: "You'd actually hurt me?" And if that line gave us a pang in our hearts when we first watched Season 2, imagine rewatching it now that we know what happens in Season 3. Demetri is chased down the mall, running for his life, and then he's locked in a grip, as his best friend menacingly advances towards him. Demetri appears as the damsel in distress, however his friend is not the one who will fight to protect him, but rather his tormentor.

During the party at Moon's, Demetri manages to briefly go through Hawk's mask and reach out to Eli, thanks to a casual conversation about Dr Who. But then the beer incident happens, and Demetri defends himself with the only weapon he has – his loudmouth. The situation is reversed, and for a brief moment, he gets to be the dominant one as he discloses all Eli's most intimate secrets. Demetri is now actively contributing to the Hurt/Comfort dynamic; he's no longer just a target, but he's doing his part to enlarge that gaping hole that has formed between them. And Hawk didn't take it well.

From this moment on, Demetri becomes a sort of obsession to Hawk, who hunts him down the school, teasing him and taunting him sadistically, like a serial killer from a horror movie, during the big fight. Of course, in real life, this would be completely insane, and the police/a social assistant/psychiatrist should be called, but in ShipLand, these situations are pure gold. Okay, we get it, Hawk wants to get revenge for the humiliation at the party, and he wants to crush that nerd part of himself he sees in Demetri, but he does it with such an intensity that it borders on ridiculous. It's like this is his twisted way to acknowledge Demetri's presence. Eventually, Hawk ends up smashed into the trophy case, and I confess I felt a little disappointed when Demetri broke that hug to give Hawk a roundhouse kick. I mean, it was a great comeback, but I was sincerely hoping for a "No hard feelings man, let's get outta here!" scenario.

Getting back to the sick and twisted way Hawk acknowledges Demetri's presence, he destroys his science project after he got jealous due to him being confident in his nerd self and laughing around with his ex girlfriend (whom the writers insist he still has a crush on). Speaking of Moon, I have a feeling she likes Hawk mostly based on his badass appearance. Remember when she goes "I like this (mohawk) and I love these (muscles), but I'm not dating a bully"?

Then the football match happens. Okay, let's break this down. Demetri trips Hawk and acts all sassy, and a fellow Cobra Kai is immediately ready to take him down, but Hawk stops him. "Fight smart, he says". Too bad that literally 5 seconds earlier he had shoved a kid to the ground just because his ex girlfriend (again, duuuh~) ignored him when he winked at her. And then, as he's trying to intercept the ball, BANG, Hawk hits Demetri, sending him to the ground, pretending it was an accident. So, what does this tell us? That Hawk has some serious anger management issues? Yeah sure, but also that he cares about fighting smart only as long as it serves as an excuse to leave Demetri for him, because he's his designated target. Again, this is all but romantic, and it doesn't necessarily have to be interpreted as him lusting after his friend, but it's undeniable that this dynamic offers a lot of ship fuel.

The arm breaking thing is just too painful to even analyze. We see a completely helpless Demetri begging for mercy to his ex best friend, who has made No Mercy his life motto. And that scream, oh that scream. All I wanted to see was Hawk realizing what he had done and throwing himself on his knees while begging for forgiveness. But I'm glad that at least we get to see he feels awful for what he's done, and I like to think that, as he got home, Eli cried out all the tears he had in his body thinking about poor Demetri at the hospital, with a swollen broken arm, all because of him. Of all the situations, this is undoubtedly the most deranged and extreme, and if something like this happened in real life, the wrongdoer would deserve to be punished and would definitely need to be sent to therapy. But in ShipLand, this opens the road to many, many different scenarios, in which the bully understands his mistakes and shifts back to the good side, or the two share a tender moment after they reconcile, or the traumatized character has to to learn to trust the other one again, or the bully becomes overprotective of his former victim, etc.

#3 - A Rewarding Reconciliation

Finally, we come to the reconciliation, in which Hawk makes his heel-to-face turn. While we've seen him torn with doubt for an entire season about his sensei's teachings, his actions and the people he wants to surround himself with, the key factor that drives Hawk's redemption is the sight of his best friend being held down for him to beat. And with an epic stunt and his awesome KEEEH screech, Hawk jumps to the rescue of his friend. Like many of us, Demetri thought this was still part of the "Only I Can Torment Him" dynamic I discussed earlier, as he steps backwards a little concerned, but then he understands that action was actually meant to save him, and the two begin to fight side by side, in sync, watching each other's back. You can see Demetri's eyes sparkling at the thought of having his friend back.

Also, not only Demetri stands up to alpha bitch Tory in defense of Eli, but he also speaks for his friend when he's faltering, just like he used to. So kudos for Demetri.

#4 - The Red Oni, Blue Oni Dynamic

Binary Brothers are two sides of the same coin and complete each other with opposite character traits, visually expressed by the color red and the color blue. Being the color red typically associated with violence, rage, passion and irrationality, as opposed to blue, which is associated with calmness, melancholy and rationality, red is clearly the dominant color. Again, this opens many interesting scenarios for shippers.

#5 - Body Language

Besides the situations I described above, which may or may not be read from a romantic/attraction standpoint, there are also a collection of small gestures I noticed when rewatching the series with a more attentive look on their relationship.

- Demetri's heart-broken expression when Eli shamefully covers his lip during the anti-bullying announcement.

- The smile Demetri gives when Hawk responds "Hell yeah!" after Aisha proposes to crash Yasmin's party, implying he's learning to embrace this new wild side of his best friend

- The astonished look with which Demetri watches Hawk at the tournament and the way he's pissed no one knows his real name.

- How deeply hurt Demetri is when Hawk belittles him by saying: "Five against three. More like two and a half." He even tries to reply, but he's caught so off guard that words die in his throat.

- How Demetri takes a step towards Hawk during the mall fight, before Sam makes him back off, and how sadly he looks at Hawk's nearly unconscious body after Robby defeated him.

- How Demetri smiles and nods when he briefly connects with Eli at Moon's party, despite the mall incident.

- How Hawk watches Demetri juggle with the cleaning product from behind his bike helmet (how did he stuff the mohawk in there by the way)?

- Hawk's psychotic/sadistic faces when he smells Demetri's blood, and how he likes to hunt him down like he's his prey.

- Hawk's secret impulse to comfort Demetri after the arm breaking (I hope you get nightmares of Demetri's howl of pain for the rest of your life, Hawk).

- The way Hawk twitches his upper lip when he sees his friend Demetri in danger.

- How Hawk and Demetri are so absorbed in their new-found friendship, that they're caught off guard, and Demetri swings Hawk to allow him to deliver a kick using their handshake as a lever. And how they keep fighting together, shaking each other's hands even when they're out of focus and the attention is on Miguel vs. Kyler.

- How they're standing so close at Miyagi Do, in comparison with the other Red/Blue partners.

In conclusion, this kind of relationships are engaging and entertaining to watch, and they make us wish the best for the characters. They make us hope that, in the end, as Miguel puts it, love really conquers all (and what is friendship if not a form of love?), despite all the hurt they did to each other.

So this is it. I hope you enjoyed my Ted Talk. Feel free to share it with whomever you want, especially if you need some solid reasons why this ship has got some good potential.

And remember: the ship is in the eye of the beholder.

F.

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

Vol. LXXVIII

It was a love story from the very beginning.

All For You (Part I)

(12x06/12x07/12x08)

Hello my friends! We are running fast with this season, this time I will talk about three episode, so remember I will focus on those details related with Destiel, and maybe brief comments about other topics.

So let's start!

What the mouth says

We met Asa Fox in episode 12x06, and first of all, let me say, he dies, and he's wearing blue color. (Raise your hands at the mention of another Cas mirror!)

Let's jump into a little funny scene...

Dean: [his mouth full of pizza] Jody, you watching some kind of chick flick here?

Jody: Well, Dean. I’m a chick.

Dean: No. No, no. You’re– you’re a badass sheriff chick. You’re not a-a rom com chick. Wait, are you a rom com chick?

Jody: Are you?

Okay, this is the way Dean talks with himself, because deep inside, this man is a sweet, romantic bean. He puts this wall around him, because he has this toxic masculinity saying him being romantic is chick flick thing. But even so, with Cas, he will show this chick flick side, gifting him the mixtape. So yes, Dean is a rom com rick.

This is a Yockey's episode, so we will have a lot of hints about Destiel showing up with mirrors.

I quickly wanna point that, as I said before, Asa is a Cas mirror, he's a legend, handsome, and well known by women. Everyone were carry the dead differently, but Jody, Jody was his lover. So she would feel the lost more deeply. She is now taking the place a mourning girlfriend would take. Then, she's representing future mourning Dean here.

There's a huge difference between what Dean says and what Dean really feels.

He repeated what he had learned from his dad and Bobby and many others hunters he met in this dialogue with Sam:

Dean: He died on the job. No better way to go.

Sam: You really believe that?

Dean: Yeah. What, you don’t? I mean, come on, Sam, it's not like we're in the “live till you're 90, die in your sleep” business. This? [Dean points at Asa’s hunting wall] This only ends one way.

Sam points out at those words his brother is saying, 'You really believe that?' because he's almost sure, after all these years, maybe his brother doesn't think the same the old hunters had said. But Dean comes back and repeats it again. There's a huge difference, as I said, between these old statement and what Dean really wants. We will discover it slowly through the followings seasons.

Focusing again in Asa/Jody as a Destiel mirror, we will be hit by the idea of Jody fantasizing about having a life with Asa, just like Dean with Cas. And the way Asa dies, a demon who wanted to be 'personal' is a huge foreshadow of Lucifer killing Castiel to make it personal for Dean.

Finally, let's talk about family love vs romantic love, because Yockey will play in this episode with Mary coming back after leaving and episode 12x19, when Cas comes back, and the difference in Dean's reaction to it...

Gif set creditb@artemiskitsune

If you pay attention to the dialogue between Dean and Mary, is less dramatic, compared with the reaction he will have with Cas. Is more calm, and less raged. He's mad and he's scolding his mom for leaving and not sending enough messages as he would like.

Sam words are more wise, and will present us what Dean really feels...

Sam: (...) We just got you back, [Sam continues while we see Dean outside drinking from his flask] and he's just scared we're gonna lose you again, (...)

This settles perfectly what Dean feels for his mom, but also, explains Dean's reaction to Castiel coming back, not just in episode 12x19, but mostly after he will come back from the Empty. The trauma and fears in loosing Cas again. Explaining why he decides to jump into the AU without saying a word to Cas, or before he comes back in season 13.

We also had Mary uncovering Asa's dead face, mirroring Dean in the future uncovering Castiel's face when he was dead.

Sacrifice myself for you

Episode 12x07 gave us a cute Destiel moments, mostly Cas being sassy with Dean. The well known lumberjack scene. Which showed us how Cas replies sassy at Dean, even when Sam was on the let's joke about Cas' wardrobe in LA.

Gif set credit @lesbianlenas

We did have worried Husband Dean with eyes on his angel on the stage, when Lucifer was fighting with him too... Hearteyes.

I want to talk too about Roseleen and her devotion, pathologic devotion, towards Vince Vincente. She willingly cut her skin and took off one teeth for him. Like a sacrifice, plus the song that sounds like Ladyheart's hit "Bloody Messiah", knowing Jesus Christ was the Messiah for Christianity, we have here more symbolism for the big sacrifice we will have at the end of this season. Sacrifice for love.

Jealousy and foreshadowing the Empty

Episode 12x08 is purely Lucifer too, but we had a couple of interesting things.

CAS and CROWLEY: Agents. Agents.

DEAN: Okay, this has gotta stop.

Dean is done with this duo, but mostly jealousy is the one talking here.

Before focus myself into the title of this episode, I want to stop a second in the Lucifer/President scene. We have the darkness and Lucifer talking with the president, so we have two presidents in the dark. Just like we will have two Cas (Cas and the Empty) talking in the Void.

Now, Lotus. Is related to purity, and not for nothing we will have fem!AUMICHAEL wearing a lotus ring or allusions to Indi gods (pictures in episode 14x03) on the wall with lotus flowers.

Who's the lotus flower? Who will be conceived in this episode? Yes: Jack.

To Conclude:

In this first part I wanted to show you how the written were giving hints about Castiel's death and the Empty.

How the angel will be willingly to give everything for love, even his life. Like a 'bloody messiah'.

Hope you like this none, see you in the next one!

Tagging @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weird-dorky-little-deana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @authorsararayne @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @teddybeardoctor @pepevons @helevetica @isthisdestiel @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @horsez2 @qanelyytha

@destielle @agusvedder @spnsmile @shippsblog @robot-feels @superlock-in-the-tardis @superduckbatrebel @2musiclover2 @nickelkit @anon-non2 @cea1996

If you want to be added or removed from this list, just let me know.

If you want to read the previous metas from this season, here you have the links:

Vol. LXXV, LXXVI, LXXVII.

Buenos Aires, September 9th 2020 5:27 PM

[real-jaune-isms]

RWBY Volume 8 Chapter 12 Review/Remix: Creation

For only having a couple major set pieces, this was one of the most plot dense chapters we’ve ever seen from this show. Some of those were a lot time coming and satisfying as hell, and some came right out of nowhere to massive speculation and theorizing to follow. But goddamn if I didn’t love every minute of it, so let’s mosey on through to see just why that is.

We open, as many of these chapters have been want to do, with shots of the Grimm causing chaos and destruction, in this case Teryx attacking airships. JNR fly by in a ship of their own, and looking rather concerned as they approach Atlas Academy. Why the shot was framed quite like this I’m not totally sure, because it looks like they’re approaching the city itself from quite far away when really they should have been approaching from the outskirts and flying over the city itself, considering where the Schnee estate is located. Ironwood is waiting for Penny at the landing site at the entrance to the Academy, just as he and Ruby had agreed on, and he’s got a new toy. Both pistols of Due Process have been slotted into the back sides of a larger firearm, a veritable hand cannon that needs both grips just to keep steadily aimed. I think it’s safe to call this the Gun-gun we had been joking would be coming eventually since the early Volumes. The Ace Ops are backing him up, and we see a few Atlesian Knight robots loading the bomb onto an airship so he can nuke Mantle at a moment’s notice just as he warned. The citizens of Mantle are out of the mines and looking very apprehensive about the whole thing, and we are right there with them. Just as the bots have finished loading the bomb and are about to leave they start getting shot down. Ironwood warns the Ace Ops to be ready for any altered state Penny might be in and any trouble her friends might try to cause. Harriet is all to ready to follow through on the general’s terms and put down any brat who tries to interfere, and this whole thing seems to finally give Vine pause. He’s not stopping now, how can he, but he’s reflecting on the path to get here and only now has some amount of remorse about it. Elm winces at the mention of that too, while my MCU fan mind had to stop and chuckle at a pale bald man with energy powers musing on philosophy and ethics so close after the end of WandaVision. Not intentional, obviously, but a great coincidence. Ironwood gets a ping that there are intruders in the hangar, and they all surmise that’s Robyn and Qrow trying to interfere with the bombing. Harriet is ready as hell for a chance to beat them bloody after all this time STILL believing they’re Clover’s killers, but Elm makes a good point that they can’t just leave to do that because Ironwood will need backup here. Lucky for all of them, Winter is here to provide the general just that, so the other three are free to deal with their fugitive problem. With a quiet moment between them, Winter tries to see if Ironwood can be talked down one last time. He doesn’t want to hear it, and she admits she knows it would be impossible to try.

Penny soars in and lands in front of them, surrendering herself to a pair of cuffs and surprising Ironwood a bit in actually coming alone. She says she’s obeying his order because above all she wants to stop further death and she must open the Vault. The virus coming back a little to compel her to this end, or just frequently repeated phrase for the sake of simplicity? Unclear. Ironwood finally lowers the gun-gun he was pointing at her and puts a reassuring hand on her shoulder to tell her she’s done the right thing. In a cadence very much not her own, she agrees she has, and all illusions are dropped. It Was Emerald All Along!~ And JNR as well as Oscar are standing a few yards behind her along with the airship she must have been masking the approach of with the sound of “Penny” flying in. As shocked realization dawns on his face, James is kicked in the chin by a backflipping Emerald. His gun flies out of his grasp and she catches it with a grin before disappearing. Damn she really has been getting good with her Semblance! Down in the hangar, the Ace Ops arrive to see the jailbirds slicing and blasting a ton of robot soldiers. Just as they’re about to join the fray Marrow is heard giving a command and his former teammates are left frozen under the power of a Semblance they never seemed to give its due diligence. The assembled Huntsmen and Huntresses start attacking Ironwood and he counters the first few attacks rather well. I’m sure he must be pretty damn shocked to see Oscar still alive after shooting him into a pit, and for that matter probably Jaune and Ren too with what Harriet told him about their mission into Monstra. That and how little sleep he’s probably gotten recently make it very likely willpower and his Semblance are the only things keeping him going at this point, so who are we to be shocked if he starts losing to their superior numbers? And start losing he does, because Winter is on their side and helps Nora bash him upside the head. Winter and Oscar charge at James on the back of a summoned Manticore, but he grabs it by the horns and stops it dead in its tracks. So they leap off and Winter hits him in the back with some ice while he’s busy destroying the summon. With another glyph she springboards Oscar back at James and he gives him the old rapidfire cane jab. It knocks his Aura pretty low by the looks of the flickers, but he still recovers and stops Oscar on the next swing. Before he can punch the poor boy any more than Hazel already has in the last 12 hours, Winter does the most anime move these series has yet to offer us and darts past her old boss to slice him at lightning fast speed. It’s a badass sight that I cannot describe with enough words so please just watch for yourself. With that, Ironwood’s Aura is broken and he passes out then and there. Qrow and Robyn apologize for freezing the Ace Ops like this, but these times call for hard choices. Emerald reappears to get uncuffed and Winter tells the five of them to move on to Phase 2.

We flash back to the end of the last episode where Ruby decides taking Penny to the Vault might be a risk worth taking, and we see Jaune and Ozcar immediately pick up on what she’s thinking. Why not try and use the Staff of Creation and hope it can work a twofold miracle of saving Penny and all the people of these two cities? Just then Weiss gets a text from Winter, and the gears start turning in our minds how this whole plan came together. We see Winter shoving Marrow into an elevator and looking very grumpy about the whole experience. He correctly guesses she’s not arresting him, but damn if he doesn’t get why she had to punch him to get him outta here. She rightfully tells him it was to make it look believable and she just saved his life thank you very much. He notices she’s texting someone and asks whom, and she says getting in touch with Weiss for some help is something she should have done a long time ago. Just then the elevator doors open and we get the payoff to who Robyn and Qrow were so surprised to see last episode: These two. Winter quickly sees this as a chance for even more help, and I think it is the happiest she’s ever been to see Qrow. Shifting back to Schnee manor, Weiss is going over the risks of this plan of theirs to the other 10 teens. Oscar pipes up with another danger, Atlas falling as soon as the Staff is used for anything new. The cover story about Gravity Dust keeping the kingdom afloat was only half wrong, there really is a large amount at the base of the landmass that will slow the descent a bit, but it will still be a cataclysmic landing. Jaune suggests using the Staff to get everyone in the danger areas to somewhere safe, possibly even another Kingdom, but Oscar says it doesn’t just work that easily. Especially not with HIM involved. The Staff has a sentient presence you have to deal with to make anything happen, but he’s a real card this one. He gives you what you ask for and only what you ask for, so you have to be specific and provide details or even blueprints for how to make what you’re asking for. Lucky for them Whitley has access to the layouts of Atlas and Mantle due to preparing for their earlier evacuation plan, so they’re off to a very good start. Oz still worries about Ironwood and the bomb at this point, but Weiss assures him they have a good plan for that. And we just saw what that was and how well it worked.

So now we get to see what Team RWBY is doing while ORNJ is handling Ironwood and whatever else Winter is having them do, flying an airship up to the hole Oscar left in the bottom of the Vault and having Ruby use her new Semblance skill to carry the rest of her team and Penny up through that and into the Vault itself. Klein and the other Schnees are also aboard the airship cuz someone needed to fly it and they weren’t gonna stick around in the mansion after the Kingdom starts falling. Ruby can basically fly now, no big deal it’s totally fine this doesn’t make her OP as hell, WHAT???? Okay I’m done. They get to the Vault door and with a shoulder to lean on and a few supportive words Penny opens it no problem. In the split second before Penny starts self-terminating now that this objective is completed, RWBY zooms into the grassy meadow inside this cold winter Kingdom’s vault on another Rose Express and Ruby grabs the Staff. Time stops as we see Winter escorting James to a cell in the brig right next to her other manipulative father figure Jacques, OJNRE are in front of some sort of computer monitor, and various other shots of what people are up to at this second are shown. In a cloud of blue mist emerges a man every bit as big blue and naked as Jinn was, but while she was thicc he is jacked. I don’t know how to describe his light blue hair but it’s got a ponytail so that’s fun. He seems charismatic af with a voice many assumed was Matt Mercer but is not, and seems he’s still a little steamed over how boring a request making Atlas float was. Ruby gets his attention and we learn his name is Ambrosius. When faced with a request to stop Penny from dying, Ambros informs them a limitation of his powers is resurrecting the dead. So everyone theorizing the Staff could bring back Pyrrha, or Clover, or any other beloved character were disappointed to be proven wrong. But bringing back the dead isn’t what Ruby is after, and once Ambrosius sees for himself just how atypical of a girl Penny is he understands their intention clearly. He lets them know of his rules, he is essentially a monkey’s paw and what you get may be exactly what you asked for but not what you hoped to get. They knew about this technicality problem too, so they brought Penny’s blueprints and ask him word for word to “Make a new version of her using her exact same robotic parts”. The robot parts are what have the virus, and once they use the Staff to make something new that infected robot Penny will cease to exist. But if he only removes the robot parts that will leave behind the life and soul that truly makes her Penny. It’s also not within his power to directly destroy, apparently, but it wouldn’t be killing her because it’s leaving her existing with just her soul. Yang flexes her prosthetic arm to illustrate their point that the mechanical parts are just extra. Ambrosius is enthusiastic to give this a try, but he has no idea what the finished product would be, so Ruby encourages him to get a little creative with it. He’s eager to give it a try but does warn them he can’t guarantee what the results will be, but they insist they have no other options and he does a sort of dance in the air like a full body orchestra conduction. Penny starts floating in swirls of blue mist, and in a flash of white light one becomes two. With his job done, Ambros fades away with a wink.

All of Atlas starts shaking, and ORNJE take that as their cue to start their next task: broadcasting to all of Atlas and Mantle a warning that Atlas is falling. Jaune is the one to deliver the message after some troubles figuring out how to get it working, but before he can offer any reassurance that a plan is in motion to save the masses... the broadcast is cut short along with all communications in the Kingdom. My money is on Watts being responsible, but maybe it was Atlas command on a hunch of what Ironwood would want them to do. James himself didn’t tell them to cut it off, cuz he’s still unconscious in a jail cell. Speaking of those cells, Jacques demands answers on what the hell is going on from his eldest daughter. She asserts that they will be getting everyone to safety and leaving the falling rubble to Salem for all the good it’ll do her, but Jacques is still worried he won’t be among those saved. Winter hesitates but tells him that yes he will be evacuated too. He thanks her profusely but she refuses to accept that credit. If he wants to be grateful he has to thank Weiss for deciding to free him, and that news shuts him up right quick. Weiss has been his least favorite child, yet she’s still the one to show him mercy and kindness because that’s the sort of woman she’s always been and he tried to stamp that humanity out of her. What an ass he must feel like.

Back down in the Vault, two Penny’s stand before RWBY. One looks like we’ve always known her, but starts moving and jerking around robotically with red eyes and sparks flying out of it as it collapses to the ground. The other has bare human legs, no gloves, no power sign on her neck ribbon, a natural fabric bow in her hair, and aside from that is every bit the sweet and good girl we’ve come to know. Some people say this was a mistake or a bad move to take away what made her such a unique character but... they really didn’t. She was able to grow outside of the limitations of the body she came into existence with and now lives purely as who she has always felt herself being inside. And that’s pretty cool. She’s naturally very disturbed to see another version of herself collapsing and dying right in front of her, but feels a lot better getting to hug Ruby. Penny never knew a hug could make you feel this warm inside, and gives hugs to the rest of Team RWBY. It’s very very cute and we’re all glad to see she’s doing so well now. 

With this taken care of it’s time to summon Ambrosius for the evacuation creation. He seems to have no concept of time because he doesn’t realize how little time has passed and is surprised to see they’re the ones who summoned him again. And considering how thorough they were with the last request he’s probably bummed he won’t get to pull a fast one on with a request this time either. They try and ask him to make doorways all over Atlas and Mantle that will all become a single doorway in Vacuo, but he requires too much complex metaphysics and space time bending to make that happen so they alter course. Make a central location all the doorways in Atlas and Mantle will open into, and then have a single door in that big new place that will open in Vacuo. He wants to know just what kind of central location they would have in mind, and Yang says he should make one that exists outside of Remnant’s reality just like the Vaults seem to. He commends them for being so smart about it, but acknowledges that could end up being foolishness instead. As a point of reference for the doorway system, or perhaps just for where in Atlas and Mantle they should be opening, Weiss shows him a series of blueprints for the layout of the Snowshoe shipping hub and how it connects to Atlas. Using that basis he makes dozens if not a hundred or two doorways all over the two cities. They’re big gold ovals with pale blue centers, and on the other side is a big empty black void with a series of narrow walkways without and sort of railings connecting all the portals to a single large one at the end of all the converging paths. Very dangerous if anyone ends up tripping or knocking anyone else over. People are very confused to see these things suddenly pop up, but we see Joanna hesitantly step through one and see just what the deal is. Realizing it’s their way out she seems to go back and tell the others. I gotta admit, the look of this large doorway in the midst of a barren rocky place like this gave me serious ending of Kingdom Hearts 1 vibes, and I half expected Mickey Mouse to be on the other side talking about the Door to Darkness. But that’s just me. Satisfied that the job is done, they thank Ambros who tells them they were indeed disappointingly thorough and they can go now. As they head out the broken robo Penny fades away to blue dust and real Penny is rather shaken to bear witness to that. Before he disappears into the Staff for who knows how long now, Ambrosius delivers one last warning about the world of doors and paths they just created. Do Not Fall. With that ominous warning ringing in their minds the five young women head into the doorway before them with the intent to go to Vacuo with everyone else and the hope in their hearts that they’re not forgetting anything important. We see Cinder wearing a hooded cloak in the midst of a crowd about to head into one of these portals, and it becomes very clear what important thing they may not have taken into account.

Time to wait 7 days to see what could possibly go wrong now!

[casualneonglitterpainterposts]

So I've been working on something over the last week and here's what I've been up to:

Meet my Robot Master/ Reploid OC Miss  "Ivory Plant" (Ivy for short or Ivory woman) and her adorable Mutant Venus fly trap buddy Ivan.

She was inspired by my pal

YellyDany

Robot Master OC Gardener Man (I though he could do with someone to love besides his sunflowers)

Here's her profile and her back story too (just her heads up her backstory is a little long but really good- I promise) I recommend you read it sometime to better understand who Ivory is:

Name: Ivory Marguerite Plant  or just“Ivory Plant”

Nicknames: Ivy, Rory, Flower bud (Gardener Man), Poison Ivy (by Professor Chaos)

Age: 20 (resembles a twenty year old human female)

DOB: September 2nd

Race/ Gender: Reploid / Robot Master/ Female

Height: “5’6” (167.3cm)

Eyes: Magenta  

Family / Friends: Professor Enigma (Creator/ father figure), Gardener Man (Love interest/partner), Ivan (Adorable mutant venus fly trap pet), Professor Enigma’s Team of fellow scientists / robotics engineers( close friends).

Occupation: Botanist, Biologist, Peacekeeper Environmentalist, warrior/protector

Personality/Traits: Tends to be very quiet, a to herself kinda person- mostly due to her past, fun, loving, a little awkward at times, smart, kind, spunky, badass very friendly, loyal, selfless

Abilities/Powers: Can talk/ understand plants (physically/ emotionally- i.e she can sense when they feel pain e.t.c), Fast/agile, quick reflexes, very skilled blades woman,

Likes: Nature, the environment, gardening, her special little green house, plants, taking care of others (including her plants and other people), Ivan (her mutant Venus fly trap), biology, chemistry, doodling, fulfilling her duty as a robot master/peacekeeper and protector, being a badass warrior, poofy baggy clothing (she loves her one piece she wears all the time the most), The colours royal purple, parrot green, bright magenta and gold, watching her plants grow (over time that is), growing flowers, the art of Bonsai, roses, sunflowers and a certain Gardener robot master (Gardener man) 😏.

Dislikes: Her past, being used and manipulated for others gain ( reference to her past), professor Chaos, bad guys, criminals, evil/ wrong doers, those who purposely harm the environment, being a bit clumsy around a certain someone 😏, being disturbed during her work, early mornings, ignorant/ thick headed idiots, people trying to take her research/scientific works (she does some pretty cool advanced stuff), those who go in her lab without her know abouts.

Profile/ Backstory: Ivory was designed as a Robot Master, not an ordinary one- A protector of nature and humanity …

Her creator Professor/Doctor Garin Enigma Wanted to take his time building his Robot “Ivory Plant '', he’d begun to slowly piece her together day by day, after all Ivory was his most specialist /advanced reploid designs after all . On the other hand jealous Evil Professor/ Doctor Kirk Chaos had heard about Enigma’s robot, so late one evening he broke into Enigma’s lab, stealing both Ivory’s blue prints and her unfinished built body- Chaos was too quick for the police and managed to run away with Enigma’s robot- He made sure to hide well so Enigma could never find him or his robot master “Ivory Plant ” ever again.

After studying her blue prints and what Enigma had built so far, Professor Chaos decided to tweak Enigma’s Reploid Master a little. As he continued to finish the last few parts (Enigma had 95% of Ivory made) to her internals- He implanted a very Powerful yet unstable (in the wrong hands of course - wink, wink) module inside her. Taking advantage of so, Chaos used Ivory or Ivy/ Poison Ivy (as he renamed her destructive self) for his own gain- using simple mind control he’d manipulate her into causing havoc and destruction. Though after returning to her true sweet loving self  after each time, Ivory felt ashamed and disgusted that this horrid man was making her do so- she couldn’t escape his control and if she tried to fight back, Ivory was only abused by his goons.  

Though after many months of this horrendance torture, shame and mistreatment Ivory learnt the truth about her creation/creator though one of Chaos’s minions she’s managed  to give a “talking to”. It was devastating and hurt her deeply to find out what Professor Chaos had done- Such a cruel cold-hearted monster he was…

On the other hand Enigma and his team had been searching all over the entire city for her, Enigma was losing hope and soon became quite depressed after the loss of Ivory- she was like a daughter to him- she was to be a great Master and protector.. But now.. Now he knew all hopes of ever finding her again were very slim- He knew Chaos would do whatever it took to hide her from him…

During one of his latest searches for Ivory (though still feeling quite depressed), Enigma found himself caught in the middle of a frightened and terrorised runaway crowd of people. Enigma couldn’t help but go forward and explore the situation, for some reason this seemed very suspicious …

When Enigma made his way in towards the commotion- his eyes must have been playing some horrid trick on him, he couldn’t believe what he was seeing… It was his lovely Robot Master Ivory in her armoured form- though she seemed different and was acting very dangerously.. Pulling out his x-ray tech specks, Enigma quickly analysed her internals- he was disgusted  at what he’d found. He couldn’t believe that Chaos put such a powerful (dangerously powerful) and unstable module inside his reploid. Enigma just couldn’t withstand watching Ivory (under mind control) cause so much damage, quickly pulling out a small device  which would break her free of the mind control/ stabilize the module- he targeted the device at her and hit her right on the upper arm. Ivory returned to her normal self, she collapsed to the ground out cold and unconscious. Enigma ran over to her side and picked her up, he carried her back to his vehicle and took her home to his laboratory..

In the course of his return back to his laboratory, Chaos and his Goons were locked up and taken away. Enigma couldn’t have been more pleased to hear the news.Now with Ivory back in his grasp and on the repair table of his lab- Enigma did a full body analysis scan on his reploid to see what damage Chaos did to her. After doing the Analysis, he found exactly where Chaos implanted the powerful yet unstable module- right beside her heart. Removing it from her body sadly wasn’t an option- Enigma knew once it was implanted in a reploid it would bond and become one with the reploid, also if he were to try and remove it it meant taking her fully apart and wiping her mind completely.  Professor Enigma knew his only option was to make a special orb that could control the stability/ use of power from the module, but still allow her alone to use the immense power through a much more controlled way. So whilst she was still unconscious and resting- Professor Enigma set out to make her this stabilizing orb. Half an hour later the orb was complete- it took the form of a choker (he didn’t want to just randomly put it on her neck). Removing the temporary one he’d put on her earlier, he placed the orb choker around her neck- The left Ivory hooked up to his analysis machine- keeping an eye on her systems as he allowed her to rest.

Twenty-four hours later, Ivory awoke- she was a little startled and panicky at first, but then she realised she was safe when Professor Enigma (her original creator) came bursting into his lab to help her .Enigma unhooked her form his machines, the took her outside. The two sat down on the slightly cold stone stairs- though Ivory felt so lost and so ashamed for what Chaos made her do under mind control, She told Enigma everything. After their talk- Ivory sat there looking off to the side, sad, ashamed with a few tears in her eyes- Enigma comforted her and told Ivory that he would help her get past this pain Chaos caused. She smiled sincerely, grateful for Professor Enigma’s kindness.

Many months onwards, Ivory soon began to feel like her true self and her past pain faded away- she didn’t feel like a monster no more. She was out and about fulfilling her destiny to be a great protector, she also was an amazing and talented scientist too. When she wasn’t doing so, Ivory would spend most of her time talking to her one and only mutant Venus fly trap buddy Ivan (he’s like a lil’ dog ^^). Ivory was special- she had the ability to communicate and understand nature/the natural environment. She on many occasions would also help out / assist Professor Enigma and his team with scientific research or experiments.

One evening though, on her way back to Professor Enigma’s Laboratory- with Ivan in her arm, something (More like someone 😏) caught her attention. A tall fair young male reploid wearing a big floppy straw hat, working in his garden and talking to his big beautiful sunflowers. She stood there watching him, slightly blushing- Ivory was surprised to see that she wasn’t the only one who could talk to plants or loved to garden. She just couldn’t help blushing deeper a little more- this mysterious man was quite handsome. Ivan was starting to feel a little bit left out, he made a small screechy whine noise which caught the attention of this stranger and Ivory. When Ivory saw the handsome stranger turn around, she went beet red-turning around quickly herself to run off- Ivory lost her footing and tripped- heading face first towards the ground. When this mysterious handsome reploid turned around, he saw this young female reploid awkwardly falling to the ground. Gardener ran over to her side just in time- Catching both her and her Mutant Venus fly trap. Ivory’s eyes were closed tight, then she slightly opened one, only to find that she had been caught by the mysterious young reploid man she was staring at..

Gardener Man: “Are you alright?”

Ivory (Blushing, but shaking it off quickly): “U..um.. Thank you. I’m alright. But where’s Ivan?”

Gardener Man: “You mean this little guy? He’s alright”.

Ivory (Smiling): “Aww, I’m so glad you’re safe too Ivan “

Ivan made this cute little happy squeal noise, gently licking the side of her cheek.

The mysterious young reploid man raised his brow in confusion/ in a questioning manner- then politely asked:

Gardener Man: “You can talk to plants too? (he says blushing a little).

Ivory with Ivan in her arms stood up, blushing still, looking off to the side and fidgeting about a little…

Ivory: “Y..Yeah.. I can talk to plants, I have the ability to feel what they feel and understand them like no other”.

Gardener Man (Blushing a little more): “O..Oh.. Nice I can talk to plants like that too”.

Ivory (Awkwardly blurting out/ all cutesy red in the face): “Y..yeah I saw you could do that, Um.. that’s the reason I kinda tripped over and fell”.

The mysterious young reploid man stood there blushing ever so deeply, then awkwardly introduced himself to her…

Gardener Man (Still blushing deeply): “Erm..W..Well.. A..Anyway, I..I'm  Gardener Man, It’s nice to meet a fellow Botanist like yourself”.

Ivory blushed all cutesy as she bowed her her:

“It’s nice to m..meet you Gardener man. And I..I’m Ivory, some call me Ivy l, though sometimes Professor Enigma and his team call me Rory”.

He came up close to her, holding her hand, he gently shook it in gratitude..

Gardener Man (Still blushing a little): “ It’ was a pleasure to meet you Miss Ivory, oh I mean Rory”

She smiled sincerely once more, blushing, then she looked down at the sunset…

Ivory: “Oh crap!!!, I’m going to be late. I hope Professor Enigma doesn’t mind. It was lovely meeting you Gardener Man, but I better get going”.

Reaching into the frog pocket of his overalls and pulling out a small packet, he placed them into Ivory’s hand..

Gardener Man: “Here, take these. For your garden.I hope we can see each other again miss Rory”.

Ivory (Blushing deeply, Nodding her head):  “Oh..um, s..sure, I would love to spend more time with you , that would be great”.

He bowed his head once again, politely tipping his straw hat to her..

Gardener Man: “Good bye miss Ivory, Until we meet again”.

Ivory (Blushing, walking off and waving back to him from a distance): 

“ G...Goodbye Gardener Man.”

Eventually she arrived back at Enigma’s laboratory (Her home), he was a little puzzled when she arrived back so late, it wasn’t like Ivory- but Then he saw the packet of sunflower seeds in the little satchel pocket on her utility belt-he smiled sincerely, Enigma instantly knew why she’d returned back so late now. When she finally got back into her quarters, Ivory placed Ivan back on her desk, then went outside to her small greenhouse- planting the sunflower seeds that Gardener Man had given to her. After she planted them, Ivory just stood there resting her cheek in the palm of her hand- slightly slumped over daydreaming about her next meeting with Gardener Man.

Over the next few weeks, Professor Enigma began to see change (Good change) in Ivory- she seemed much happier and enlightened. He was glad to see her well being improve, especially after all the crap she went through. Ivory, was spending many of her hours out and about with Gardener Man- Usually helping him with the nature reserve/garden, hanging about with him or just spending quality time in general with him. Each time she met up with Gardener, her feelings for him only seemed to grow stronger and stronger. He too after spending all this time with Ivory- Gardener Man soon felt himself fall for her too. As things in Ivory’s life began to improve, a disturbance from her past was arising once more …

Professor Chaos, with a little help from his two trusted Goons- Spark and Rust, Escaped from prison. Of course though, his first plan was to get his hands on “Ivy” again-but this time using a special mind controlling collar that he built secretly in prison,  so he could use that unstable module of hers to take down the city and build his empire of ruthlessness and take over the world of reploid robotics..

Late one evening, walking through one of the many beautiful moonlit gardens, Ivory and Gardener Man were out and about together, Tonight though Ivory knew she’d finally muster up the courage to tell Gardener Man how she really felt about him …

As the two came to a halt on the open pavilion (round circular path in the centre of the moonlit garden), Gardener Man turned to face Ivory, Looking deep into her eyes- causing her to blush ever so deeply.  From in the bushes behind, unaware, Professor Chaos and his two goons sat their watching in disgust as they got ready to put the plan into action.

Meanwhile, back on the pavilion …

Gardener Man (still looking into Ivory’s eyes and clutching onto her hands): 

“ Hey, Ivy.. Look I must say it’s been wonderful having someone like you to talk too”.

Ivory (Blushing): “ It’s been wonderful being with you too Gardener”.

The two stood there blushing all cutesy and looking off to the side a little- the Taking a deep breath in, slowly releasing, Ivory spoke once more..

Ivory (Fidgeting about nervously a little, yet still blushing): “ Well um,  Y..you see Gardener, there’s something I want to tell you”...

Gardener Man (Blushing a deeper shade of red : “Y..You can tell me anything you like Ivy”.

Sighing out loud and blushing deeper herself, Ivory spoke once more …

“W..Well Gardener, I.. I just wanted to say ….”

Professor Chaos couldn’t take this disgusting sappy reploid romance anymore…

Professor Chaos: “NOW!!! NOW YOU FOOLS, GRAB HER!!!!!”

Ivory (with a slight tremble of fear in the tone of her voice) : “Huh? C..Chaos?...”

Rust Violently shoved and punched out Gardener Man into the shrubbery, Spark on the other hand grabbed Ivory from behind aggressively holding her down in a choke hold- shattering her stabilizing orb into a million tiny pieces. Ivory gasped, gaging- kicking and screaming , fighting back, trying to break free from Spark’s grip. But alas he was way too strong- then out of the shadows, a bone chilling yet familiar voice spoke..

Professor Chaos: “Well, well, well it’s been so long since I’ve seen you my beautiful “Poisoned Ivy”. Come now.. I have a wonderful gift for you”.

Ivory’s eyes widened in fear, with a few tears trickling down her cheeks as her past trauma flashed back through her mind. When she saw the horrendous collar he pulled out from his lab coat- she kicked and screamed louder and louder as Chaos got closer and closer..

Getting up and out of the shrubbery, Gardener Man- a usually calm, kind man was certainly enraged and unhappy that these Goons and Professor Chaos were hurting his Ivory. Gardener Man ran up to them, pulling out his futuristic hedge trimmer shears in defense.

Gardener Man: “HEY, GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY IVORY OR ELSE” (he came closer with the blades to Chaos’s ugly mug).

Chaos with a disgustingly smug smirk on his face…

Professor Chaos: “Oooh, whatcha gonna do? Trim some hedges to torture us?”

His two goons (the idiots that they are) laughed.

Gardener Man (stepping forward, in an unusual stern tone): “ I’M WARNING YOU CHAOS, LET HER GO OR ELSE”

Still standing there with such a smug expression on his face, Chaos did so..

Chaos: “Very well then.. Remember now.. This is YOUR doing. SPARK!!  DROP HER.. NOW!!!”

Just as Spark slammed her knee first to the ground, Professor Chaos swung his hand with the mind controlling collar and aggressively let it automatically tighten to her neck. Ivory was on her knees screaming in pain as electrical sparks flew out of the collar..

Gardener Man’s eyes widened in shock/ horror, Chaos stood there chaotically laughing like a maniac- Poor Ivory did all she could to fight the power and pain, but it was too late it now controlled her mind- activating the true potential and darkness of the unstable module from within.

Professor Chaos: “Good girl Poisoned Ivy. Now You WILL do as I say. Your First order, transform and get rid of this pathetic reploid. Then go cause havoc and destruction in the city”.

The collar shocked her once more, she bowed her head, knelt down on one knee…

“Poisoned Ivy” (Under mind control): “Yes Master, I shall”.

She stood before them Transforming (Magical girl style of course) into her true yet powerful badass armoured Robot Master self..

Gardener Man stood there, blushing quite deeply- he never knew how truly beautiful yet badass Ivory really was- seeing her like this was causing his circuits to overheat a little 😳🥵.

Alongside Ivory, her weapon of choice- a long bladed bo staff covered in theory vines appeared. Chaos with such a manic smile on his face..

“NOW POISONED IVY, DESTROY HIM!!!!!!!”

Gardener Man snapped out of his daze, he backed away, though in fury yelled out at Chaos-

“YOU MONSTER!!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO IVORY? I’LL MAKE YOU REGRET EVER CONTROLLING HER MIND CHAOS!!!!!”

Chaos rolled his eyes and watched as his newly controlled “Poison Ivy” got closer and closer to the foolish Gardener Man- Swinging her bladed staff widely towards him…

As he walked backwards a little quicker, Gardener Man lost his footing and tripped- slipping. Though as he slipped and she wildly swung her blade- the tip scraped the top of his shoulder, only just cutting through to his internals- leaving some minor damage..

Gardener Man (holding onto his shoulder, gritting his teeth): “ ARGH!!! You’ll regret this Chaos”.

Gardener man got up holding onto his slightly damaged shoulder, staring into Ivory’s eyes.

Gardener Man (Sincerely speaking to his beloved): “I know you’re still in there Ivory, I’ll be back to save you”.

Poison Ivy Growled (she’s still wearing the mind control collar), just as she went to manically swing her blade once more, Gardener Man ran off clutching onto his slightly damaged shoulder. Poison Ivy was just about to go after him..

Professor Chaos: “NOW, Poison Ivy don’t worry about that pathetic reploid- go out and about- cause havoc and destruction in the city”.

Poison Ivy: “As you wish master”.

And with that she ran off into the city, taking down anything and everything that got in her way. On the other hand bursting through the doors of Enigma’s laboratory, still clutching onto his slightly damaged shoulder blade- Gardener Man called out for Professor Enigma. Some of his team (robotics engineers) took Gardener aside and repaired his damaged shoulder blade whilst Enigma came along.

A moment later and not too soon, Professor Enigma came running into his laboratory..

Professor Enigma (in a panicky tone): “What’s happened, what is it, where is Ivory?”....

Gardener Man looked off to the side, sighing heavily…

Gardener Man (in a sad yet disappointed tone): “ I’m sorry professor, but somehow Chaos has escaped prison, he ambushed Ivory and I, he destroyed that orb around her neck and replaced it with a mind control device”.

Professor Enigma: “CHAOS IS WHAT? AND HE’S DONE WHAT TO IVORY??.. Oh no!!!!”

Gardener Man (Sighing and looking to the ground feeling ashamed) : “ I’m sorry professor, I tried to protect her yet I failed to”.

Professor Enigma (placing his hand on Gardeners other shoulder): “ It’s not your fault Gardener, Chaos stole Ivory back when I was in the middle of completing he- he damaged her the moment he placed that unstable module inside her. But right now, all we need to do is stabilize that module once more and get her back..”

Gardener Man: “But how will we get Ivy to listen to us?, Chaos has turned her into a fully dangerous weapon of mass destruction”.

Enigma turned to face Gardener Man, with a sincere smile he replied: “You can talk to her, she’ll listen to you-for you see Ivory cares about you very much and loves you deeply with all her heart”.

Gardener Man (Wide-eyed and blushing): “ S..She loves me? O..Oh Um (he blushed a deeper shade of rose, looking off to the side).

Professor Enigma still stood there sincerely smiling. Then called upon his team and then finally turned his attention back to Gardener Man…

Professor Enigma (Gently tapping Gardener’s shoulder): “Come now Gardener, we have a reploid to save”.

Gardener Man (shaking it off): “R..Right Professor, Let’s go save Ivy”.

In the middle of town, a mind controlled yet deadly “Poisoned Ivy'' was causing chaos, causing havoc and destroying everything in her path. People and other reploids ran away in terror and fear as this mighty robot master unleashed such wrath and power from within. Professor Chaos and his two goons watched as their newly formed “Poison Ivy” tore up the town …

Professor Chaos (Evil Cackling): “Ha ha, Look at those fools run in fear, that unstable module certainly has such immense power. Ah she’ll have that city torn to shreds in no time”.

Spark: “He he you’re right boss. You’ll have your empire in no time”.

Moments later, back down in town, Enigma, Gardener Man and his team rolled up- Professor Enigma was hurt to see his beautiful reploid Ivory being tortured and forced to be violent…

Enigma (under his breath) : “You Bastard Chaos, you’ll pay for what you’ve done to Ivory”.

Then from his pocket he pulled out a small device, handing it over to Gardener Man.

Professor Enigma: ” Now Gardener, I need you to get close enough to Ivory so you can palace this small device on the collar- it’ll override the mind control she’s under and deactivate the collar - automatically separating itself from around her neck. Can you do that for me?”

Gardener clutched the small device tight in his hands, bowing his head to Professor Enigma.

Gardener Man: “I promise you professor, I’ll save her for you no matter what”.

Enigma sincerely smiled, nodding his head back in agreement. Gardener left the professor’s side and ran off to save Ivory. Sneaking up through the rubble, Gardener Man watched as his sweet little flower bud Ivory (under the control of the collar) tore the city to shreds with her mighty long-bladed ivy staff. He still couldn’t help blushing at Ivory in her armoured form, indeed she truly was a beautiful yet badass botanist..

Now though, wasn't the time to let one's circuits overheat again, Gardener had a mission, to save his sweet Ivory. Up on his perch, as he continued to watch “Poison Ivy” destroy the city, Chaos caught a glimpse of Enigma, his team and Gardener Man- This made his blood boil, he let out a loud cry in anger..

Professor Chaos (in Fury): “ARGH!!!! GOONS, GET EM, GET EM AND DON’T LET THEM GET NEAR POISONED IVY!!!!!”

“YES SIR!!!!!!” (Spark and Rust replied running after them).

The goons unleashed themselves and went on the attack- chasing down Enigma and his team- Spark and Rust on the other hand went after Gardener. They weren’t going to let him get near “Poisoned Ivy”. The two couldn’t wait to tear that little punk to shreds.

Just as he turned the corner to get to Ivory, Gardener was cut off by Spark and Rust..

Spark: “And where do you think you’re going flower boy?”

Rust (snickering and chiming in): “Yeah, why don’t you just run off back to that reserve of yours and plant some more seeds”.

The two goons stood there cackling themselves stupid at their poor mocking humour, Gardener didn’t have time for their crap- rolling his eyes he attempted running past to continue his mission.

Spark grabbed him tightly by the arm, slamming him up and against the wall

Spark: “You’re not going anywhere near her now flower boy”.

Rust: “Let’s break him Spark”

Spark: “Great idea Rust, here I’ll hold him down and you can throw the first punch”  

Gardener Man (getting frustrated as he tried to break free):  “ARGH!! I don’t have time for you idiots”

Spark: “Hit him now Rust. Go for that killer swing of yours”.

Just as Rust swung his arm, Gardener found the inner strength to break free from Spark’s grip- Dodging Rust’s punch. Instead Rust used his killer punch on Spark, right in the side of his left cheek.

“KAPOW”...

“ARGH, RUST YOU DUMBASS, YOU GOT ME RIGHT IN THE FACE”..

“Sorry Spark, that little flower boy punk dodged my punch”.

“GRRR, THAT’S IT, I’VE HAD ENOUGH, LET’S BREAK THIS LITTLE FLOWER PUNK UP”.

Gardener was concerned, he didn’t have time for this, nor could he back out from it either. So he decided to do the only thing he could do..

Stand his ground and fight back..

Gardener Man revealed a side of him he’d never thought or imagined showing others. Throwing his straw hat aside, he let his enragement unleash his power from within- he piled out his futuristic hedge trimmers, though this time they were long sharp holo- blades. Spark and Rust seemed a little intimidated but these idiots were willing to fight anything…

Gardener Man (in a smug tone): “So you two meatheads still wanna fight? Huh? Come on then, I’ll let you throw the first hit”. 

Rust ran towards to hit him, Spark went from behind and Gardener jumped up dodging their poor attack. They were furious- so they continued to fight- throwing whatever they had to stop him from saving Ivory. On the other hand, Enigma and his team were captured and taken back to Chaos …

Professor Chaos (with an Evil Grin): “Ah, lovely to see you Enigma, please sit back there all tied up and enjoy the show. Don’t worry Ivory is in good hands now”.

Professor Enigma (growling): “YOU FILTHY BASTARD CHAOS, ARGH YOU WON’T WIN THIS”

Professor Chaos (getting up close in his face): “Oh Enigma, I already have”.  

He said cackling out loud. Enigma sat there watching Ivory, then Gardener Man..

Enigma (to himself): “You’re our only hope now Gardener, I know you can save her”..

Back down on the ground, Spark and Rust were exhausted trying to fight Gardener Man- it was no hope, he’d dodged all their attacks and managed to throw a few of his own attacks in. Just as the two- with the little bit of energy they had left- swung once more, the side of Gardener’s Holo-blade skimmed across the surface of their arms- cutting the surface of their disgusting skin..

“ARRGGGH!!!!”  

The two fainted/ fell to the ground in exhaustion and pain. Gardener Man stood their for a moment looking over them, then putting his holo blades away, he pulled out the little device Professor Enigma gave him and ran off to save his beloved flower bud Ivory…

From his perch, Chaos slammed his fist in anger…

“ARGHHHHHHH!!! YOU GOONS ARE USELESS, I’M GOING AFTER THAT BLOODY ROBOT MYSELF”.

And with that Chaos jumped into his hover pod and went down towards Gardener man and Ivory. Gardener caught up to Ivory once more, in that time she’d managed to do a lot of damage in town- it hurt Gardener to see her doing this under Chaos’s control. He just couldn’t take it any longer..

Gardener Man took a deep breath in, slowly releasing he came close to face  “Poisoned Ivy”..

“IVORY!!, I mean Ivy”

She stopped swinging her blade and turned around..

“Huh?”..

“It’s me Gardener, Come now this isn’t you. Please stop this nonsense and come back to me-Professor Enigma and I can help you”.  

Deep down inside her there was still a small part of her that Chaos couldn’t control, her heart- that part of her responded back to her love…

“G..Gardener?”

“Yes, yes it’s me Ivy, come now take my hand, let us spend the rest of our lives together in my nature reserve”.

He put his hand out, she sincerely looked at it- with a tear in her eye- she then moved her hand closer to his …

Professor Chaos jumped out from his hover pod and ran over to Ivory with the control to her collar in his hot wrinkly hand. Just as Ivory’s hand got an inch away from Gardener’s, Chaos pressed the button on the control, sending painful/ dangerous amounts of electricity through the collar into Ivory…

Ivory fell to her knees Wailing and screaming out loud in pain…

“ARGHHHH, ARGHHH, ARGGHHHH!!!”

“You disobedient little brat, how dare you stop destruction, now get up and fight you worthless girl”

Gardener was so furious, he ran up close to Chaos and violently swooped the remote out of Chaos’s hands. The remote fell, shattering into a million pieces- now no one could control Ivory except for the collar still around her neck. The mind control collar still had control of her mind and that unstable module inside was still overpowering her too much.

Then Gardener Man chained him up, leaving Chaos chained and in the hands of the law. Then he did the one thing he needed to do was save Ivory. Dodging all the rubble and havoc, Gardener Man had reached his love again, grasping the small device in his hands. He knew the only way to get through to her was with his words- so he spoke lovingly from his heart once more…

“Ivy.. Ivy it’s me again”

She turned around once more, with a cute yet confused expression on her face..

“Now Ivory, take my hand and let us be together forever, just you me and our beautiful garden”

“Y..you a..and me?”

“Yes Ivy, just the two of us”.

Ivory’s eyes welt up with tears, she let her bladed staff fall out of her hands and onto the ground. Then in that very moment she fell into his strong arms- not only out of love but because the immense power had destroyed some of her circuitry/ internal. Gardener caught her, placing the small device on the collar- it deactivated it and ivory was set free. Then she transformed back into her normal everyday self. Ivory was stone cold to touch, Gardener Man stood there cradling her in his arms- he wasn’t ready to lose his special flower bud.

“You’ll be alright my dear sweet Ivory” (he says gently running the back of his hand down the side of her cheek).

The police- well prepared this time took Chaos and his goons away to a very specialised and inescapable prison. Professor Enigma and his team were set free. Enigma made his way over to Gardener and Ivory- When he reached the two, he smiled sincerely…

“Great job there Gardener Man, you saved her. Now we need to get her back to the lab for some repairs- both that collar and module have caused severe damage to her”.

“Very well then professor, let us save her”.

Not long after they arrived back at his laboratory, Ivory was rushed into the Professor’s personal lab with the team for immediate repairs. Gardener Man sat in Enigma’s office, awaiting the news that Ivory was alright. Three and a half hours later- Professor Enigma entered his office Gardener lifted his head up with a questioning look on his face..

“I..Is she alright Professor?”..

Professor Enigma (sincerely smiling): “Ivory is alright, her body is repaired and I gave her a stronger stability orb- this one though is made of Lothanium- it’s both lightweight and indestructible- only she can control the module and the power inside her”.

“May I see her?”

Enigma nodded his head in agreement and with that one of his team members took Gardener in to see her. There in her quarters, Ivory lay slumbered in a healing coma, wired to the analysis machine to keep check on her internal systems, until she awoke. Gardener Man sat by her bedside until she awoke, he gently held her hand in gratitude as he was grateful she was still alive.

As days passed and she still remained slumbered, Gardener stood by her side. He couldn’t help but put sunflowers by her bedside table too- he knew how much she loved them. Very early one morning, Gardener sat asleep in the chair by her bed- Ivory awoke from her healing coma. She felt a little wobbly at first, but slowly sat up- rubbing the sleep from her eyes. Once she’d fully awoken, Ivory looked over at her bedside table- there in the center was a vase of beautiful golden sunflowers- only one robot Master grew sunflowers that beautiful…

Then her memory came back, it was horrible and thinking about it brought her to tears..

“GARDENER, GARDENER MAN, WHERE IS HE?” (she shouted with a slight sobbing tremble in her voice).

Her voice echoed through the lab, Professor Enigma and his team came running. Gardener Man awoke startled, yet overwhelmed with joy to see Ivory awake..

“GARDENER MAN, WHERE ARE YOU?????”

He got up out of the chair and sat on the bedside alongside Ivory comforting her..

“SHHH,SHHH,SHHH, your alright Ivy, it's alright. I’m right here, you’re fine. It’s ok you're safe now, I promise”.

Ivory turned around, her face lit up- she nearly knocked Gardener man off her bed. But lovingly hugged him. Professor Enigma looked through the doorway sneakily, he too was glad to see her awake, but he told his team to head back to their work- he thought it was best to let the two have some alone time so they could catch up.

As she sat there cuddling him, Gardener Man wiped the small tear drops from her eyes-Ivory just averted her eyes cutesy blushing as he did so. The she sat up, blushing some more and fiddling with her fingers, then in a soft sweet voice spoke:

“U..Um, Gardener Man? “

“Yes Ivory?”

“Look, a.. About the other night..” (Ivory blushing redder than before)

“Y..Yes Ivy?” (he says going red and blushing himself).

Ivory (coming a little closer- like an inch from his face, now completely beet red and her heart racing):

“ I.. I just wanted to say, um.. I really love you, like a lot and I wanted to give you this..”

Closing her eyes and as red as a beet, Ivory leant forward and lovingly kissed Gardener Man on the lips. Gardner’s eyes opened wide and his face went as red as hers, but he just kissed her back. Moments later the two sat their unlocking lips, averting their eyes blushing- then Gardener Man grabbed her hand the two just sat there together being adorable. Then Gardener mumbled..

“Ivory, do you still want to come live with me on my nature reserve, just the two of us?”

“And Ivan?” (Ivy chimes in cheekily).

“Of course he can Ivy” ( he says all cutesy glowing and smiling sincerely).

Many months later, Professor Enigma and Gardener Man helped Ivory heal over her trauma. During that time Professor Enigma let her go off and live with Gardener- after all he brought out the true happiness inside her. Ivory though would always go back to professor Enigma and help / assist him with many of his botanic experiments / engineer research and experiments.

Ivory was finally set free of her horrid past and now she spent the rest of her days doing what she loved with the handsome robot master she loved- flourishing their garden, looking after the reserve and protecting the people.

The End!!!!

Anyways, I hope you like Ivory as much as I do. Hopefully soon I can do some doodles of her and Gardener Man- also a sketch or two of Professor Enigma and Chaos too ^^!!!

"Ivory Plant belongs to me !!!!!!"

"Gardner Man belongs to my pal YellyDany "

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Humans are Weird, “Autograph.”

Wrote this between sporadic bouts of studying because I have the attention span of a flea and the motivation of a blob fish. So This is for those of you asking about what happened after “Movie Star.” 

He watched his shuttle hit altitude and then vanish into a pristine blue sky. The roaring of the engines faded away until there was nothing but the distant thunder of jet engines, so much quieter in comparison to the wild screaming of the spacefaring craft headed on her way back to the Harbinger, and a crew that would be captained by his second in command. It hurt him to think that someone else would be captaining his ship, that she'd be in deep space without him.

He wondered if this is what it felt like for a parent to leave their child for the first time.

It all just made his heart ache, and he had the sudden desire to call and make sure she hadn’t spontaneously combusted as soon as he had entered that shuttle leaving her on the docking port moonside.

“Yep, she totally exploded, the entire crew is dead and their ashes will forever float through space.” He turned his head to glower at Conn floating at his back and staring up into the sky with a grin.

“Shut the hell up Conn.”

“Make me.”

“Do I need to remind you that the only thing between you and a snapped spine is a gravitational chastity belt.” he snarled 

Conn adjusted the gravity field harness around his narrow-protruding hips, “Speaking of chastity belts-”

He held up a hand, “NO-no I am stopping that line of conversation right there.”

A gentle hand rested on one of his shoulders, and he turned to find Sunny standing over him her head tilted slightly to one side. The expression she had on was almost comical for an alien without human facial structures, “They’ll be fine.” Then she slapped him on the back making him stagger forward, “Now stop frowning, You should be excited.”

He straightened himself out adjusting his jacket.

To his side, Krill sighed and looked up at the sky with an almost longing expression.

“What’s your problem?” Sunny wondered 

The Vrul sighed, “The amount of time I spend on a class A death planet is really making me question my sanity.”

“You’re only now beginning to question your sanity?” Adam wondered wryly as he looked around the tarmac. Aside from a couple of baggage carriers, and people in bright orange vests, there was no one here, and no way to tell where they were supposed to go.

“Ha ha, funny ...Where are we going?”

“Guess we sort of just head towards the terminal?” He glanced towards the taxiways between them and the terminal and shook his head. That didn’t seem likely, but also…. There was no one here, “Or not…. I would expect at least someone to be here.”

Sunny crossed her arms in annoyance, “Seems kind of rude they would ask you to come and then just…. Leave you.” 

His eyes scanned over the tarmac once more, baggage carts, buggies, distant buses, a fancy black car, but nothing close by. He adjusted his bag over his shoulder, “May as well walk to those people over there and ask them. I don’t want to get in the way of the planes.”

Adam, followed by his extraterrestrial entourage slowly began heading in that direction. A bus rolled by them going the opposite direction, and the black car from earlier turned onto the same road to roll past. Adam kept walking.

“Commander!..... Commander Vir.” 

The group of them spun in a tight circle turning to face the car, which turned out to be a limousine, the front window rolled down, and a man in a dark suit leaning out.

Adam looked around like there was someone else by that name standing behind him before pointing at himself, “I ur…. Me.”

The man parked the car and stepped out reaching over to open the car door, “Mr. Ellis apologizes that he couldn’t meet you in person, but he hopes that you will find his personal car satisfactory. Adam blinked like a deer in the headlights, “Er… uh… are you sure you’ve got the right person?” He eyed the car.

“You stupid or something?” Conn wondered floating towards the door and vanishing inside the car, much to the driver’s confusion and surprise. He stared after Conn with wide eyes before turning to look at Adam.

“Believe it or not he's actually pretty tame for his species.” The commander sighed stepping forward and thanking the man awkwardly as he slid inside.

He wasn’t entirely sure if satisfaction was the word he’d use to describe how he felt. Everything, and he meant everything was extravagant and eccentric to the extreme. Crystal glasses, with the appropriate liquor, adjustable colored lights, heated seats in a fabric he couldn’t even name, the absolute definition of leg-room so that even Sunny was comfortable. There was a TV just above the far end turned to the news, a snack bar, a sun roof. He folded his hands in his lap afraid to touch anything for fear of damaging it.

Sunny scooted to sit next to him while Conn and Krill took the other side. 

Conn leaned back in his seat, “Not bad.”

“You would say that.” Adam muttered leaning a little closer to Sunny hands pinned between his knees so as not to touch anything.

Sunny had no such qualms sprawling out like she owned the place head resting back onto a fluffy set of cushions just before the window, “Now this, I could get used to.”

Adam disagreed, there was no way that he would ever be able to get used to something like this. In fact, at this moment he was wondering what he was even doing here, hanging out in famous people’s fancy cars with private drivers. He wasn’t special enough for something like that. In fact, he was a soldier, that was it, and arguably not even a very good one. He was just some lucky son of a bitch who had alien friends and a spaceship somehow by coincidence.

He should have been happy, but felt himself wilt internally as he looked around the car at all the fancy things.

Conn watched him from across the car but said nothing.

Unfortunately for him, Sunny caught the tension glancing between him and Conn. 

The were rolling out of the LAX tarmac as she spoke, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” Adam interjected over Conn, who continued to speak through Adam.

“Boo hoo, oh woe is me, I’m not special enough enough to be here, I am just an average guy who's not even actually good at anything wa ... was.”

Adam snarled at Conn, “get the hell out of my head Conn.”

“You can’t just leave your mind dangling open for all your thoughts to flop out.”

“Thanks for phrasing the analogy that way Conn, I appreciate it.” he leaned back in his seat arms now crossed, “And yeah, I feel a bit out of place. I should be back up with my men doing something useful but here I am being treated all special by people who barely even know me. If they really did they wouldn’t be half as interesting. If they knew how half the stuff I did was pure dumb luck, or how i spend most of the scared out of my mind. How I’m not some kind of badass.” Sunny hummed deep in her chest, “Yes, the story of the man whose dumb lluck led him to being the most important human in the galaxy is totally boring. Yawn, I am falling asleep already.”

“You don’t even yawn.”

“Why do you think I said yawn instead of actually yawning then?” 

He growled, “My point is, I just feel out of place.”

“Welcome to being a celebrity Adam. Having dumb luck that put you in a position for people to look up to you. You think these people got here because they are ACTUALLY special. No, they got here because their parents were famous, or because they got into good acting schools when they were kids, or because they knew a guy. All of these people got lucky, aren’t actually special, and there are plenty of people out there more talented than they are, but at this point they are so famous no one cares anymore.”

Adam sat in silence contemplating the thought, “II mean…. When you put it like that.”

“You know it's because I am always right.” Sunny said smugly.

He turned his head towards the window watching the city pass by below them. LA was the largest and one of the most ancient cities on the continent. Of course it spoke nothing of a city like Rome or London, but it was still pretty impressive. The entire place was so shiny and white mixed with delicate greenery all built on the bones of the slums. Not only was LA one of the oldest cities on the continent it was also one of the richest. The further they went the nicer the already nice buildings got reaching towards the sky all shiny and white.

Massive mansions dominated the distance with high gates and private shuttle pads. 

The sky above them was dominated by flying cars, private shuttles, and the occasional jet. One mansion they passed by was so big, it seemed  as if the front facade went on for almost a mile intertwined with many decorative fountains and trimmed hedges upkeep exclusively by robots.

They turned down another street heading into the city with expensive outlet malls and large flashy brand names that probably cost as much as the warp core used to power his ship. He was both parts intimidated and stunned leaning towards the window to stare at all the strange people that walked the sidewalks.

He turned his head following a very excessively dressed man in a tailored ball gown that took up most of the sidewalk.

Where he grew up in the suburbs, there had been people who dressed according to plenty of other time periods, but the trend had been early 2000s mostly thanks to his mother who performed the modest almost utilitarian style of their clothing plus they had never been rich enough to afford new fashion. Jeans were cheap, easy to make, a staple of the poor masses. Not that they had been poor poor per say, after the war his father worked as a farmhand for Megafarm producing millions of pounds of produce, while his mother had quit teaching to pursue business in talor-making period accurate clothing for those who were into that sort of thing. As a result, his family had been middle middle class.

But this…. This was for the 1%. A place he had never even dreamed of seeing.

He looked down at himself again, shabby jeans, black T-shirt and a hand me down leather jacket from his older brother David, which had seen better days.

He sunk down in his seat.

They took another corner and pulled up to the gate. He craned his neck to look out the window glancing up to the large sign hanging over the gate which read.

HOLLYWOOD STUDIOS.

Named for the ancient strip of land which produced many of the early movies when film was in its infancy. Once famous for the land and the people who lived there, it was now famous for being the highest grossing film studio EVER. A powerhouse of film that practically monopolized the world of action. While a lot of people demonized the studio for being a monopoly on film, Adam could see why.

They made some good shit.

The gate buzzed open and they were driven inside. He HAD to get a better look rolling open the skylight and standing to look out the top of the car. Hundreds of people dressed in costumes, carrying props, cameras, equipment. Mouth open like an idiot he stared through open warehouse doors and onto virtual projected sets on which actors stood in full costume, or in motion capture suits. Camera men walked around in massive exoskeletons controlling up to ten cameras at once.

A dog trotted past with a handler, a dog that Vir recognized from plenty of movies in which she had starred tail wagging tongue lolling. He dropped back inside the car with wide eyes staring at Sunny who was also looking out the window with wide eyes.

The car came to a stop towards the end of the strip, but then picked up again rolling into one of the giant warehouses and pulling to  a stop. The engine cut, and the doors opened. He stepped out thanking the Driver.

“Commander Vir! Just who I wanted to see!” He turned just in time to catch Director Ellis, or more like be blinded by him, as he skipped up wearing his strange sequin suit and cat-eye glasses. Instead of going for the handshake the man grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him, “It’s so exciting to finally have you here. You will be so excited to see what we have done. Just like you said, being as accurate as possible’ it's been a real challenge, but I assure you, you will be so proud. We have done so much research, and I have talked to experts everywhere” 

A mousy little woman scuttled after him holding two cups of coffee looking frazzled and exhausted as she tried to keep up with her boss.

Members of the crew looked up from where they were standing and a few exclamations of awe went up, and he couldn’t blame them, aliens were pretty cool. Despite Conn being a total asshole, he cut an impressive figure of billowing white ribbon and slow ethereal movement.

The man pulled back eyes widening at Conn, “You will be an absolute bitch to animate,”

“Match his personality.” Sunny quipped stepping out of the car.

She was greeted excessively by the director as well as Krill.

A sizable crowd had gathered, and Adam stepped back intending to allow his non-human friends the attention they deserved.

That’s not exactly what ended up happening. Stepping out of the circle he heard a shriek that made him nearly leap out of his skin. He turned to find a young woman with large glasses wearing a grey suit and pencil skirt. There was a pile of papers and a clipboard on the ground at her feet like she had dropped them.

Her eyes were wide as she stared at him mouth open.

“Er…… are you ok?” He ventured leaning down to pick up her papers.

When he stood back up she was still frozen her eyes wide. He offered her papers back.

That broke her from her frozen state but beginning with her hands which started to shake frantically in front of her. The shaking grew wider and wider, her expression grew more excited and she began to leap up and down squealing, “No way, no way…. No way no way no way.” That devolved  until she was simply squealing with excitement. 

Adam stepped back in shock and confusion, “It’s really you I can't believe it!”

She rushed forward arms out then paused, “Can I?” Her expression was so innocent and excited, her eyes so wide that he didn’t know how to respond.

“Er ...sure.”

She nearly broke his back wrapping her arms around him and squealing in delight again knocking her glasses askew. He grunted as the breath was crushed from his lungs. Despite being tiny she was surprisingly strong, and he felt his feet lightening upon the ground hands held out to the side still clutching her clipboard.

She stepped back after a moment with a big smile, her glasses canted at an awkward angle, “Can i get a picture with you.” She begged 

He glanced over his shoulder still not convinced that she hadn’t mistaken him for someone, “Um, Are you sure. I Maybe you have the wrong person.”

She shook her head vigorously giggling, “No, I’d know you anywhere. Commander Vir, the first man to meet sentient life, participated in the Drev war, commanding the first fleet of interstellar ships. You are my HERO.” She looked at him with eyes so wide, so innocent and starstruck that he hardly knew what to say.

He wondered if maybe he was dreaming.

“Picture?” She pleaded

“Um ... uh yeah, sure I guess.” She squealed again this time causing him to drop her clipboard as she grabbed him by the arm pulled him in and whipped out her phone snapping at least ten pictures of them before letting him go. “Mr. Vir it is such an honor.” She was saying, “I’ve read everything about you, all the declassified transmissions. Like that time you saved an alien race from extinction, or that time you ran a marathon on a A-1 death planet, or or like the three times you've saved entire planets.”

“Oh I…. really?”

She nodded, “Yes, Mr. Vir.”

He rubbed the back of his neck, “You can just call me Adam.”

He was nearly defined in the next moment as she shrieked again and hugged him.

“What’s your name?”

She put her hands over her mouth eyes wide, “S-samantha, but- but my friends call me Sammy…..You can call me Sammy.” He blinked in confused surprise and a bit of self consciousness feeling himself go a bit red.

 She may have been star struck, but he was sort of struck by her being star struck. This had to be some sort of dream, even more confusing when he realized the circle of people he assumed had been there for his alien companions had ll circled themselves around him. 

Men and women, stage crew, and actors in motion capture suits gathered around wide eyed and smiling.

He spun in a slight circle staring around at all the faces.

A man stepped from the crowd, a young guy in a motion capture suit. He held out a hand, “Commander, Ezra Hemming. I Well I guess I’m the stunt double for…. For your stunt double? Keith Jenning.” 

“So? You’ll be doing all the legwork?”

The young man blushed.” I guess you could say that.” 

Did he seriously seem nervous? It seemed so strange, and all these people were looking at him, approaching him, wanting to talk to him. It was insane, he shook so many hands learned so many names in such a short amount of time. At some point there was a hydraulic hiss, and the crowd around him parted.

A woman walked towards them elevated on a set of robotic stilt legs, wearing a motion capture suit, and an exoskeleton that gave her an extra set of arms. Vir felt his mouth drop open. Rita Ortiz… the penultimate action hero casting choice, and someone he had a boyish crush on for…. Well a couple of years now. 

In her exo suit, she was as tall as sunny, which he assumed was the point, “Commander.” She said politely.

“Ms. Ortiz…. Er…. Can I….. get your autograph.” He stammered out feeling stupid almost immediatly, but to his surprse she broke into a wide smile.

“I was about to ask you the same thing. Make it a deal and trade mine for yours.”

He choked with a rather sporadic laugh not believing her in the slightest.

Some of the crowd finally noticed his alien friends and Ms. Ortiz seemed especially interested in sunny, for obvious reasons. The two stepped up to each other examining the other with a critical eye.

Sunny seemed pleased.

Samantha lurked next to him, and he had a feeling she was trying to be discreet, but it wasn’t working. He was still wigging out about this hardly able to believe it. At some point, someone grabbed him and dragged him towards the director's chair where Ellis was was talking to some of the writers.

He turned in his chair, “Adam…. May I call you Adam, Good, the writers and I were just going over the script, and well we have run into a few snags. You gave us a pretty detailed explanation on some of the things that happened, but this part right here, the part where you lose your leg….. It's very vague.”

Adam shuffled his feet awkwardly glancing over to where Sunny was showing the actress how to more properly move like a Drev. A few of the VFX people were there as well examining her armor, its color and debating how best to reproduce that in post. 

“Well I….. It was taken off during the Drev war.”

“I mean, yeah we got that, and not to push but…. Unless you want us to cut that part out.”

He glanced again towards Sunny.

“I…. its hard to talk about.”

A hand on his shoulder, “I understand, I quite understand….”

He mulled it over for a minute while the writers were talking heart hammering in his chest. He had never told Sunny…. Never really explained about his post traumatic stress related to that incident. Never really mentioned how long it took him to trust her, and he never would. 

He'd never fess up to the nightmares.

Because he didn’t want them to matter anymore.

“I can’t explain it to you but…. I can show you.” The group of them turned almost surprised, and he was honestly surprised at himself too. What he was about to do…. It was a bigger deal than any of them might assume.

“Sunny!” he turned, and the bright blue alien trotted over humming happily the way that Drev did. She seemed so happy, nothing like the creature in his dreams, his friend, his best friend.

“Yes?”

“I…. Well I need to show them how I lost my leg, hard to explain, so I thought we might show them.”

He watched Sunny carefully, and was probably the only one who noticed the slight wilt in her shoulders. The guilt flashing in her gold eyes…. Of course the thing in his dreams would never have felt that way, “Oh ... are you sure.”

He cleared his throat waving it off, “Of course, here.” he stepped forward motioning around the room, “I remember the rocks being sort of like this. There was a shallow sort of bowl like a pocket and some rocks here. There were actually a Tesraki and a rundi soldier right there, and I was over here.”

The crew, following his words began moving around the greenscreen landscape creating the sort of space that he was talking about.

“Now I had one of those older models M-23s pieces of shit, and a knife.” He reached out for the prop weapon offered to him, “And the drev had a spear.” He glanced towards Sunny, who was looking very, very uncomfortable, but someone handed her the prop spear. She looked down at it and swivel it in her hand like the thing was an extension of her body.

She didn’t seem particularly satisfied but didn’t say anything. He moved up onto the fake terrain, and she did the same looking over at him with concern. It was almost as if she knew that even though he had never bothered to tell her. 

He came up one side of the set while she came up the other; she had the spear held out ready, and he had the gun up. Of course, he dropped it on it’s sling when it supposedly overheated, 

He remembered this like it had been yesterday, how the rock had felt under his feet, the panic he had felt for the two defenseless soldiers she was stalking. He remembered panicking when the gun malfunctioned, he remembered how he wasn’t thinking straight. He remembered making the decision that cost him his leg.

He didn’t bother trying to go easy on her, catching her around the neck and raising his hand with the collapsable knife.

The world began to spin, and before his eyes he saw the ash and fire.

He heard the gunfire felt his body moving as it once had. Saw the dark shadow, heard the screaming and felt the hot air over his body. He remembered the knife biting into her skin. He remembered being thrown to the ground.

Set lights flashed around him as he slammed into the floor, padded but still painful as he rolled to the side. Sunny’s foot came down right next to his head as he rolled to the side cutting at her heels.

The creature reached down to grab him, but he rolled to his feet cutting at the hand.

He remembered the sweat trickling down his body from the great heat of the volcanoes. He remembered how the ash had coated the stone making things strangely slippery. He remembered the poorly equipped gear and the oversized shoes.

He remembered slipping backwards landing hard on his back as the spear cut downwards.

He remembered bone cracking and flesh splitting in half.

He braced for pain but none came. The fire died, the ash vanished, and he found himself on the ground hands over his face, a spear tip lightly grazing the outer carapace of his prosthetic leg. Sunny stood over him spear held in one of her lower arms. Though her posture was ready for a fight, her eyes….. So much more expressive than that of the creature he remembered from his vision, looked at him in worry and something that looked like pain.

He lay on the ground looking up at her, at her mercy, just like he had been on that day.

And he knew she wouldn’t hurt him.

She withdrew the spear and stepped back offering one hand to him. 

He didn’t hesitate to take it, and she hauled him to his feet.

Together, they turned to look at the spectators who were looking on in awe,and shock.

Quietly sunny began, “Our orders were to remove their limbs…. In our culture Disability IS death. We thought that simply removing their limbs would stop them…. We were wrong.”

Adam tried to keep his voice light, “I don't remember much, but I crawled about ….50 feet down that hill before someone managed to find me and stabilize me. The leg was completely gone, no hope of reattaching something that’s just gone.”

“That was….. Intense.” Ellis finally cut in, “We should have had some cameras rolling dammit. Can we recreate that!” He began ordering his men around, and for a moment, the two of them were forgotten in the crowd. He stood there quietly noticing on the instant as two pairs of arms wrapped themselves around him. Enveloping him in an armored hug that almost completely encased him…. Safe.

A voice at his ear.

“Don’t EVER make me do that again.”

He placed a hand over hers, “Never, I promise.” 

[badboy-mysweetboy]

One Dangerous Stiff

Eric Coulter× fem reader

Ok..... Hear me out. Thus dude is just mighty fine and he could shove me off a cliff and id smile🙃 enjoy btw this don't follow the plot bro.

Warning: Sad, swearing, cute ending, badass reader

Random tags: @missmarrinette​ @pindragon​ @ericcoulterdauntlessdivergent​ @ericcoultergirl9499​

"So who's it gonna be?" Eric, one of the leaders asked eyeing the new recruits. "Me," I spoke up walking from the back of the group, his cold blue eyes bore into the side of my head as I presented in front of the group. "Is there water? Or a net?" A boy behind me asks, approaching the ledge and turning to the group with a smirk.

Eric's eyebrow raises at the movement. "Boy, I sure hope not." Rasing my fingers in a gun motion to under my chin, pulling the trigger. Lifting my weight from me, the wind throwing my h/c flowing above me as the ledge above me got smaller and smaller. The darkness around it grew to tuck my arms under my head and crossing my legs as if I was on a couch, watching the game. Then my weight was caught in a net.

Landing, my weight shifted as I looked over at a familiar face. "Y/n?" His eyes wide and mouth agape.

"Oh look my least favorite number, how long has it been 7 years? I can't remember." Getting off the net walking away as Four sent up a whistle and another came down. Beatrice, from my old, shitty faction. Abnegation.

As he pulled the net down, their eyes met and never let go. Making gagging noises they caught on before another was sent down. Four kept a gaze on me before Eric leaped down. He walked in front of the group once again as more teens walked in but in all black. Standing in the back I made mental note of the people that stood in front of me, finally meeting with a blue pair already looking at me. Eric's smirk grew into a... Smile. Bouncing my eyebrows, erupting a chuckle. Continuing his speech, my mind wandered to younger days.

"You can't catch me!" A laugh left his lips as my smaller frame tried to keep up. "Slow down!" My younger squeaky voice called out to him, running in between houses and crowds trying so desperately to just graze his skin. Before abruptly stopping being met with a chest, looking up I was met with a scary, familiar face. "Daddy? What's wro-" His hands.

Dug into my arms as he pulled me back to the box-like house, a pair of familiar eyes followed what happened. Screaming and kicking, my cheek stung as my head whipped to the side meeting his eyes once more. "Help me! Big brother, please! Don't let him hurt me!"

Instead of a hero, I was met with a coward, him shaking his head.

But that wasn't new.

But was new was he never came back.

Never.

My body painted in splotches of dark shades, my memories even darker. Daddy.

He blamed me for mom, now brother. Brother never got hit, even though he made me so mad, I'm happy I can protect him from daddy.

I don't know where he went, he was only 9 and I was 7 but I hoped he was safe till 16.

"Follow me." Shaking my head I follow as he mapped out the place to me, "Badass" noticing the grunge military aesthetic. "You're a stiff?" A gruff voice from behind me, turning to see ice blue once again. "What? Happy to see me?"

"Ha ha very funny, but no I meant-" he started, smiling I winked. "I know what ya meant, just giving ya trouble." Chuckling he continued next to me as we were showed the bunking area, " change into new clothes, we burn your old ones in 5."

"Fucking finally" walking into the room while everyone else looked around. Stripping and diving into my new black ones, turning I caught the sight of a neck tattoo before it disappeared behind the wall.

Picking up my old gray clothes and gliding towards the bonfire already made. The heat made me smile. As Four went on and on about new beginnings I tossed my clothes in like it was trash while others held it dearly to their hearts.

"Get over it. It's not like you wanted to stay, throw it in the damn fire so we can move on." I grumbled before shadowing behind the crying group. Passing it. Training. Finally.

Fighting was the only thing I knew after that day with my brother. Relentlessly for 7 years. I built up my strength and got away from the man who hurt me day after day. "What do you got stiff?" A dude was mocking Tris, who was having trouble with throwing a punch. Approaching them and grabbing her hand and pulling her with me. Standing here in front of the bag next to mine, sighing before putting her in the most impactful stance. "Tension here" pointing to her abdomen, "not here" pointing at her stomach. "Weight here, then shift it as you swing" leading her on her back foot to her front. "Swivel your foot with it. Go, right hook it."

Swallowing, Tris did as told and landed a decent punch. Eyes widening she met my e/c eyes, "It didn't hurt." Going to my bag I responded, " because you're the one supposed to give damage not receive-" throwing a hooked punch, "now keep going it hurts less more ya do it, rookie." As my fists met the leather images from childhood flashed in my mind, faces, voices. Every memory leads to a harder punch.

"Y/n and Al, ring now." Eric's cold voice boomed over the cement room, turning to the ring a boy stepped in. Smirking I went in between the ropes and cracked my knuckles. "I can't hit her, Can I fight a guy?" Al asked looking me up and down, Eric's face went from his normal bitch face to disgust. "Really? Just fight her, she has over double your score. Go!" At his command All slowly approaches, scanning his stance I could tell his core was his main focus of strength. Sighing as his fist flew passed my head, grabbing his arm and launched my foot into his side earning a yell of pain. Before twisting the now dislodged shoulder so his arm was behind his back. Laying on the floor at my will, I sat on his back holding the position as I fake checked my nails. "I'm thinking safe word fellas, how bout pork and beans?"

The boy was groaning in pain when he and Eric in unison, "What?"

"I don't know I saw it in a movie. Now, Al, I want you to repeat after me. Four is the worst number." His eyes met mine, "I can't say that."

Pulling his arm farther and farther as he screamed and the group grew as Four and Eric watched me whisper in his ear. "Say It! Or else..." Pulling his arm he yelped, "Four is the... Worse number. Now please." Sighing thinking about it for a second, "I guess so." Getting up and jump out of the ring. Watching Four as his eyes connected to his shoes, walking to the knifes section. Practice, yes I was like a perfected machine but all I knew was to fight.

That's all I've ever known.

Throwing the heavy but not too heavy weapons, the figure of the tall man came back. Making the knives go further... Faster. Until I reached down and no knives were found. Looking up, Eric was holding the box. "Dinner was called 25 minutes ago. You need to eat."

"Why do you care if I eat? You have 45 new robots to program that is eating. I don't eat dinner. Not when I can be here." Never breaking the gaze as my hand refilled with serrated steel, he grabbed my wrist with the blades. " because I like you. And I don't like people, and you're easily the best fighter here. So shower and I hope I see you in the cafeteria, or I'll come lookin" He smirked at the end, "Is that a threat or a promise Eric?" Smirking stepping forward being so close I could feel the hot breath fan over my skin. Glancing between his icy blue eyes and his pink lips I lean in a bit closer dropping the knives in the box, "I guess we'll see then?" Backing away before swaying my hips all the way to the bunks, finding the showers. Peeling the grimy clothes off my body and stepping into the icy water. The colder the better, cleaning the sweat off my skin. I turned the water off and drying off and putting on my bra and underwear.

Walking passed the mirrors I stop in my tracks. I've never seen my self as a whole, damn I'm ugly. Glancing over the scars and abs carved into my skin. Placing the tank and jeans on over the marks, I swiftly make my way to my bunk. Pulling on my boots I hear boots hit the floor growing nearer, “I thought you may have gotten the hint by now but here you are.” Turning and seeing Four, “How’d you know it was me, Y/n?” 

“Because you’re heavy-footed, and you lead with your left foot instead of the average right. Now please excuse me, I’m hungry.” Walking passed him before I felt his hand around my wrist. Stopping in my tracks he let out a heavy breath. “Y/n I’m sorry-” 

Yanking my wrist out of his grip with a cold glare, “No you’re not. You left me alone with that monster for 7 years.

 Not 7 minutes, 

Not 7 hours.

 Not 7 days. 

7 YEARS! Catch my drift you ugly bastard? Even though you ran away every time he decided to punish someone, you’d come back. But at least you came back-oh wait. You didn’t. And really the name Four? Do you really hate me that much? We both know, that’s the time dad got home every day. Leave me alone, Good-Bye Tobias.” 

The cold glare I gave him could kill, another pair of boots could be heard but my eyes never left his. “You were supposed to be my big brother.” In a small whisper left my lips before turning back to the cafeteria. Eric stood at the end of the hallway with a curious look written on his face. “Come on Y/n, I am.” Tobias’s voice echoed, not even turning to meet his gaze. “You lost that title, You haven’t been in a long time. Do what you’re good at. Disappear, Tobias.” Before continuing to Eric as we made our way back.

“Don’t mean to pry but. Tobias? What is he to you?” Eric asked as we sat with our food in front of us. Sitting criss-cross on the bench I look over, “Tobias- I mean Four grew up together. But you would collect that since you heard our argument.” Giving a small smirk at the end taking a swig of water from my cup, he chuckled placing some of the ripped up biscuit into his mouth. “Sorry bout that, but like I said I was gonna come to look for ya. So you’re old friends?” 

Finishing the food in my mouth I answered, “Well not exactly a friend. A friend you can rip off like a bandaid, painful but gone. Nope. To- Four was like cancer, you can’t get rid of it. Somehow, he comes back. But I thought he was gone for good. Shows how much I know.” I chuckle coldly eating a bit more, we sat in short silence. I could see the gears turning. Before the girl from before sat down next to me, a- Tris was her name. “Can I help you?” I ask before plopping food into my mouth, she tugged at her long black sleeves. “I wanted to thank you for earlier, he was being a jerk. And teaching me how to...” She mumbled off, “Throwing a hook? No problem Rookie. Now if ya please, go back to your chair before Four thinks he can sit over here.” I grumble the last part, letting out a heavy sigh when Four plops down across from me. 

Standing from the table I turn and go up the stairs the second Four sat. Clenching my jaw I quickly make my way up the stairs and to the roof, slamming the door shut and grumbling. “Who the fuck he think he is? Walking in like he fucking did nothing? God, I wish I didn’t love him!” I rant sitting on the ledge letting my feet dangle. 

“You love Four?” I heard an angry voice from the doorway, his chest puffed up. Looking over at Eric, “Trust me, not the way you think. Come. Pop a squat.” I pat the cement next to me, he was at my side within seconds. “Then how do you love Tobias?” 

I gulped looking longing at the bright lights against the dark sky, “Tobias is- was my big brother. We had a rough childhood. My dad was an ass, and when my mom ran away he lost it. He took out that rage on me because Tobias ran into the shadows. He left me 7 years ago, I was 7 at the time. I never knew where he went, or if he was alive. I fought to get things since dad was broke, hence to now sitting on a roof with a ruggedly handsome man explaining why I want to kill a number.” I chuckled at the end, Eric watched as I spoke about my childhood.

 I don’t hide it. Because simply I don’t care about my childhood. I won't start crying because of it, not how I was built. 

“Brother? So I have a chance?” He smiled, letting out a laugh I replied. “Yes. Yes, you do Eric.” 

[jokerfan99]

Icebreaking (RWBY/RVB) by Necroceph

*RVB Opening Theme*

Grif: Ugh... Simmons: Grif. Grif? GRIF! Grif: Wha- Mom? Simmons: Nope it's your old pal, Simmons. Grif: Oh man, I had the weirdest dream. There was this blonde chick who emerged from this crashed ship. She was hot as hell, you could've seen her! But then all the sudden she started sabotaging everything just to cover her tracks because she claimed that Command kidnapped her because they chose her to be a new host for O'Malley. Yang: Who's O'Malley?

That was no dream!

Grif: O-oh fuck... me.

He faints again.

Ruby: Not again! That's the third time he fainted. Next one might end up a coma. Sarge: Dagnabbit. Lopez, get a bucket of hydrofluoric acid. Water won't work this time. Lopez: Sí señor. Ruby: Wait won't that kill him? Donut: Nah I think he'll be alright. Probably with just a few bald spots. Ruby: Okay... By the way, Yang, what is Omega? Yang: Hey don't ask me, I only heard it from the guards. But from the way your team reacted, it looks like they know what it is. Ruby: Do you? Sarge: Of course we know him. He's our greatest nemesis. A crazed computer program that tried to kill all of us with his rockets and his laughs. Ah, those were the good old day. Simmons: No it wasn't! He made me call, Sarge a cocksucker!

WHACK!

Simmons: OW! Sarge: Still haven't forgive you for that. Donut: He tried to kill us with a robot army. Lopez: Incluso me secuestró y me convirtió en su asistente personal del mal. Ruby and Yang:... Huuuuuh? Simmons: Christ, let me tell you in detail. Long story short, he's an angry unstable megalomaniac AI used by a mercenary the Blues hired years ago. He went loose and started trying to kill every last one of us while possessing the body of conscientious objector with a rocket launcher. He was destroyed when he went into a Pelican with a bomb rigged inside it. Do you get the jist? Ruby:... Yang:... Ruby: I got lost when you said 'conscientious objector with a rocket launcher'. Simmons: Ugh... you know, forget what I said! Donut: C'mon, Simmons. You'll have to try harder. Give a story a little... 'pizzazz'. Ruby: I don't know what they're talking about, but I really wanna be in their world for five minutes. Yang: Totally. It must've been very fun here before you came. Simmons: Sigh, I don't understand. How did Command get their hands on him? Didn't the Pelican blew up with him and Tex inside? Sarge: Of course it did. I made sure he stayed dead by adding more payload inside the ship, strong enough to obliterate everything in a fifteen mile radius into space dusts. That explosion was a huge sight to behold! Lopez: Realmente no era tan grande. Simmons: And did you remove the ship's radio before that?

Both stared at each other for a moment.

Sarge:... Ah fiddlesticks. Simmons: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ABOUT THE RADIO?! Caboose: Hello! Weiss: Quiet!

Someone's calling from outside.

Yang: Who's that? Simmons: The Blues. Sarge: Captain Ahab's Barnacles, they must be here to salvage the ship for themselves. Damn vultures! Donut, Rose, go handle them. Donut: Wha- what about you guys? Sarge: One: Me and Lopez are trying to wake Grif up with EXTRA pain. And Two: Simmons' is needed here to find where O'Malley is being held at. The black box might contain information where did was being headed. Simmons: I would love to do that, Sir. IF YANG DIDN'T DESTROY THE COMM'S ROOM! Yang: I said I was sorry! Ruby: Why not call, Vic? Maybe he can ask you. Simmons: Oh please. He isn't that dumb enough to give us, O'Malley's exact location... unless... Sarge, permission to rip out the Warthog's radio. I have an idea. Sarge: Now wait a minute, you can't just rip out a piece of the Warthog! That's a penalty of- Simmons: I can do extra shifts. Sarge: Deal! Yang: Hey what about me? I can also fight those guys too. I really need to stretch this punching muscles of mine. Sarge: Punching muscles, hmm? I see why not. Permission granted. Alright, Lopez. Ready to pour that acid on him. Ruby: Yes! It's good to have you fight by my side. Yang: Hey, you're not going to let me miss out the fun. So, Donut. How many out there? Donut: Two. Yang: Two?! I expected more than fifty. Donut: Nah just two. There was suppose to be three more but I'm not sure why they didn't come along. Ruby: Hmm... maybe it's a Blue tactic. The two waiting outside are acting as a distraction while the other three are prepared to ambush us. Yang: That means we'll be surrounded. But that ain't a problem for me once I kick their asses. Donut: You against five of them? Wow, you're a bigger badass than I thought. Ruby: Trust me, she is. Back at basic, she destroyed an entire team all by herself without needing any help. It was awesome. Yang: Thank you. So what do you know about those two? Donut: Well there's Caboose on the tank and then there's Weiss. Yang: A tank, huh? That'll be easy once I throw my homemade... who was the other person?

Outside

Weiss: This is the Blue team! Come out with your hands up or be destroyed. There's no point in fighting 'cause we have a tank that outguns your pathetic little Warthog. But if do you seek battle, that's fine by me. That is all.

She turns off the megaphone and turns to Caboose, sitting inside the tank.

Weiss: Alright, Michael. We're just here to talk about the ship, no need to go all guns blazing. Caboose: If we're here to talk with the Red, why did we bring, Sheila here? Weiss: Just for precaution. Plus, I intend to see a shell liquifying both Ruby's legs. Caboose: Okay. Hi, Donut!

Donut appeared on the roof alone. Where is the rest of the Reds?, Weiss thought. Something's up and good thing she brought the tank.

Donut: Hi, guys! Hey where's everybody else? Weiss: Busy scrubbing the floors with their toothbrushes. That's what happens when you don't report anything important to your leader. (whisper) Keep an eye out for, Ruby. We're here to talk about the ship. Do you know what happened to it and where it came from? Donut: Didn't you guy's hear the crash yesterday? Caboose: Weiss didn't hear it because she was singing in the bathroom when it happened. Donut: Ooh can she sing Mordern Major General? Weiss: No. Donut: Sorry, guys. But there's nothing left to trade with you except ash and stuff. And it wasn't carrying anything too. Weiss: We're not here to trade. We got enough SMGs in the armory. How can you be sure it wasn't carrying anything? Donut: Yang told us. Weiss: I-I-I'm sorry, can you repeat what you said? Donut: I said... Yang: (offscreen) Shh! Not now. Donut: I should go back inside. We're quite busy today. Grif fainted not too long ago. Sarge and Lopez are trying to wake him up. Simmons' working on a pet project on communication and I was sewing silk for the winter. Weiss: Silk?! You don't use silk for the winter, you idiot! And winter isn't coming in another six months. Donut: I mean- Sangheili silk. It's a very nice alternative to wool... kinda Weiss: Really? And tel me, what is Rose doing? Donut: Making runs around the base. Weiss: Oh you mean... HER?

Weiss sticks out her foot slightly up in the air. Then a flash of red accident trips on the leg and crashes on the tank, head first. Ouch, that did not go as plan.

Ruby: Ow...! Weiss: Ah, poor old, Rose. Always forget that I've read every move she makes back at Beacon. Alright, Donut, enough games...

HISSSSS

The sound of hissing caught her attention. It came from next to her and... oh no. A plasma grenade is stuck onto the turret!

Caboose: Why do hear a snake hissing? Weiss: MICHAEL, GET OUT OFF THERE!

Caboose quicky jumps out from the tank. They both ran away until the grenade explodes, blowing the tank into pieces. Bye bye, Sheila (or her body), you will not be missed.

BOOOM!

Caboose: SHEILA, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

At Blue Base.

Church and Tucker could see the mushroom cloud erupted on the field. Must be one hell of a fight out there.

Tucker: Man I'm glad we're here cleaning up the base. Hey, Church can I burrow your toothbrush? Church: No.

Back at Red Base.

Weiss: KUFF KUFF... Michael, are you alright? Caboose: Yes, I'm fine. But Sheila... sniff... is dead. Weiss: What the hell was that? There's no way a plasma grenade can create an explosion that big! Yang: Unless it was made by me, YOU WHITE HAIRED BITCH!

That voice, that tone. No it couldn't be. She turned to the direction of the voice and sees a Red soldier carrying the same weapon that almost split her head into a bloody mess. And the only one carrying it is...

Weiss: Oh no...

Yang Xiao Long.

Yang: Hello, Weiss. Long time no see. Caboose: Weiss, is that the angry friend you talked about? Weiss: Yes. Yes she is... RUUUUN!

Weiss grabs Caboose's hand and run away from Yang. However they were stopped when three more plasma grenades land in front of them and exploded, creating two large craters roughly about 12 meters in diameter, six meters in depth.

Weiss: Oh crap! This is Weiss Schnee to Blue base, we require reinforcements, NOW! Yang: NO ONE'S COMING TO SAVE YOUR FIRST CLASS ASS, SCHNEE! Just you, me and these two babies, Mr. and Mrs Fisty.

Yang cracks her knuckles as she approaches towards them, with raging red eyes focused on the one and only teammate who ran away.

Weiss: AAAAAH! MICHAEL, KEEP THAT PSYCHOPATH AWAY FROM ME!

Weiss quickly hides behind Caboose, cowering herself away from that golden monster that tried to kill her. Yang stopped as her path is block by Caboose who stood calmly between her and Weiss.

Caboose: Hello... big scary lady... with big boobs. My name is, Caboose. You must be,... Yang. Yang:... Caboose:... Yang:... Uhm...hi? Do I know you? Caboose: Yeah, Weiss told me that t you are the angry friend. She also told me that you and Ruby are sisters and were part of a team in the letters R, W, B and Y. Ruby: Actually it's pronounced... ow my nose!... 'Ruby', with a 'W'. Caboose: Oooh! Wait if it's pronounce Ruby, shouldn't 'W' be a 'U'? Yang: (whisper) Who is this guy? Ruby: That's Caboose. Dumbest member in the Blue team here. Yang: A mentally retarded guy serving in the Blue army, huh? I'll deal with you later.

Yang glares at Weiss.

Yang: So, Weiss. This is where you've been. Stationed in a desolate box canyon with nothing but sand and rocks. I thought you'd be in the Atlesian army by now. Weiss: GULP! Yang: What's the matter, still afraid to face me after all these years? Hmph, how pathetic. To even call yourself a soldier is just embarrasing. Caboose: Hey you can't talk, Weiss like that! She's my best friend. Yang: You... her friend? Caboose: Yeah she may be a little noisy. Weiss: Gee, Michael. Thanks. Yang: SHUT UP! Weiss: EEK! Yang: So you know who I am, that's something. But do you know what she did before she came here? Caboose: Yeah she told me that she was in a base with you during an exam. But it got attack by space pirates who want to steal things, arrrgh. She was then given orders by her teacher to escape because she had to bring back important dates before the pirates steal it. You know I like the Egyptian ones. They're very chewy like gum. Ruby: Don't you mean 'data'? Caboose: Yeah that too. Yang: And what else did she tell you about us? Caboose: Well I know is that Ruby disobeyed her orders to save everybody, leaving the pirates to take over the base. And you kicked a guy's balls because he ordered you to tell everyone to fight back despite the pirates winning. And... Weiss, what did Blake do...? Yang: TO HELL WITH ORDERS! Caboose: Mommy!

Caboose stepped back away from Yang's explosive wrath.

Yang: Those soldiers back couldn't stand a chance against them! I don't give a damn what our superiors ordered us to do, but me and Ruby won't stand idly to see them get slaughtered. And Weiss over there, just left us and those people to die, just for what? A PLACE IN ATLAS' MILITARY! Is that something you would consider her a 'friend'? Caboose:... Yep. Yang: Good... wait, what? Caboose: Uhm... because, no matter what your friends did, he'll always be your friend. Yang: That... is the most stupidest quote I've ever heared. IT MATTERS WHAT SHE DID... TO US! Now move aside so I can pummel her bitchy face! Caboose: Nope. Yang: Sigh... then you left me no choice. EAT THIS!

Yang raises her fist and strikes Caboose, only for him to catch it mid air. His quick reflexes surprised everyone. Yang's tries to yank off her fist from his tight grasps...

CRUNCH

... followed by the sound of a metallic crunch. Caboose finally lets go of her hand. Yang looks at her right hand and was shocked to see her hand has been crushed.

Yang: WHAT AND HOW?! Caboose: Sorry! I squeezed it too tight. Weiss: Holy... shit. Ruby: Is... that normal? Yang: No. This was supposed to be made out of titanium and he crushed it... as if it was paper. That's so... metal... RETREAT!!! Ruby: RUNAWAY!!!

Yang and Ruby, run like hell from Caboose. Oh the sweet irony.

Donut: (from afar) Hey, guys. Why are you running, aren't you supposed to fight them? Yang: We're not running. This is the Xiao Long secret technique! Ruby, you didn't tell me he was that strong! Ruby: I didn't know, just keep running!

Weiss emerged from the safety of Caboose's back. She can't believe, they're gone.

Weiss: My God, Michael. How did you do that? Caboose: Oh it was nothing. I don't like bullies harming my best friends. And I like catching hands. Weiss: Nothing? I've never seen Yang run away from fight before. That's was... AWESOME. Since when did you do workout? Caboose: I just drank a lot of milk till my muscles grow strong. That's what they said in the commercials. Weiss: Milk makes your bones stronger, not muscles you beautiful dope. Now then, let's get the hell out of here before Yang come's back!

In the caves.

TZZT

Vic: Hello, Project Freelancer Operational Command Center. This is your friendly neighborhood, Virtual Intelligence Computer, calling from Blood Gulch. ???: This is Command. What seems to be the problem? Vic: Finally, been calling for ten minutes. Hey listen, your drunk driver called me last night and asked if he can parked right next to the Red base. I allowed and now the ship's here, burnt up to a crisp and sitting there like it's nobody's business. ???: Copy that, V.I.C. Is it the ship, Sanctuary? Vic: That's the one. ???: And what is the status of the subject? Vic: She is hot as hell. Where did you guys pick her up, the Red Light Outpost? ???: Ahem. Vic: Sorry. The good news is, she's a-ok. The bad news, she told the Reds what happened. They're willing to hide that fine body to stroll around their territory, tsk tsk. Send in those Recovery people to pick her up. Also get aclean up crew for this mess. Seeing that ship here is an eyesore. ???: Acknowledge. We'll send in a Recovery squad. And one more thing. How's the Alpha? Vic: Still a hot head as always. Why do you ask? ???: Nothing. We just want to know its current status, that's all. Hehehe... nyehehehehehehe... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YOU FOOLS! THE DARKNESS WILL CONSUME YOU ALL! NYEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!... Command, out.

TZZT

Vic: Hmm, must've said somethin' funny. Ah, oh well I'm sure it's nothing serious!

A/N: Sorry the is so rushed. My degree started and I've been busy lately

Deviantart: https://www.deviantart.com/necroceph

[eeveecryptid]

※ BORDERLANDS: CL4P-TP EDITION

Various lines that Claptrap bots have said through Borderlands 1, Pre-Sequel and 2. feel free to change pronouns if needed. May include nsfw material. ( BL3 version here )

"Wow! You're not dead?" "Hey, check me out everybody! I'm dancin', I'm dancin'!" "Unce! Unce! Unce! Unce! Ooo, oh check me out. Unce! Unce! Unce! Unce! Oh, come on get down." "Yoo-hoooooooooo!" "I am the best robot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I am the best robot. Ooh, ooh, here we go!" "Hey! Over here! I'm over here!" "Still haven't found the Vault?" "I'm over here!” "Rrrrrgh...this isn't working!" "Unce! Unce! I think I lost the beat... but, Unce! Unce!" "Wanna hear a new dubstep song I wrote? Wub! Wub--"  "(name) asked me to tell you about a, uh, ‘little sumthin' sumthin'’ s/he needs done. You should ask him/her about it!" "Did you find the Vault yet?" "Sure is lonely around here." "Oh my God, I'm leaking! I think I'm leaking! Ahhhh, I'm leaking! There's oil everywhere!" "I can see through time..." "My servos... are seizing..." "I can see... the code." "I don't like this... this is making me nervous. Take a deep breath- I can't breathe! This is just a recording of someone breathing! It's not real! It's just making me more nervous!" "I'm detecting a motor unit malfunction... I can't move! I'm paralyzed with fear!" "Please don't shoot me, please don't shoot me, please don't shoot me!" "Turning off the optics... they can't see me..." "The traveler will protect me. The traveler will protect me." "Good as new, I think. Am I leaking?" "The box is awaiting your attention." "Please open the box." "Yeah? Well, hmph!" [ gives the finger ] "Good luck!" "There's more to learn!" "Let me teach you the ways of magic!” "Magic waits for no one, apprentice!" "Still working on that quest?" "Shouldn't you be murdering something about now?" "Hey! You're TALKING to me! And I didn't even have an exclamation point over my head! This is the BEST day of my life!" "Sooooo... how are things?" "Hey, best friend!" "Yessss, look into my eyes. You're getting sleepy. You're getting... zzzzzz... Zzzzzz..." "Success! My spell to make you want to hang out with me worked!" "Stay a while, and listen. Oh god, please -- PLEASE! -- stay a while." "Away with thee!" "Don't you worry, minion! Give me one good shot at that (name) dude and I'll take them right out! I... just got some stuff to do first." "We've really come a long way, haven't we, minion? And you're still just as loyal as ever! Who's a good minion? You are! Yes you are!" "Yessiree! This whole place would completely fall apart without old Claptrap keeping things humming along!" "As a robot, I'm completely immune to (name)’s gas attacks. But that hasn't stopped me from incessantly cowering!" "And I thought bandits were bad BEFORE they had nightmare plants growing out of them!" "You already saved Pandora? But... but I'M the hero of Pandora! It's on my business card! I ORDERED SO MANY OF THEM!" "Sanctuary's gone? But the bank! All my stuff! All my crucial information! YES! I'M OFF THE GRID, BABY! NO MORE CREDITORS! Seriously, I owe a lot of people a lot of money." " The Vault Map is gone! Forever! It will never be found. Never, ever, ever-- is what I'll say to everyone I know while I look for it. " “ I can do more than open doors, sir/ma’am! We CL4P-TP units can be programmed to do anything from open doors to ninja-sassinate highly important Janitor-y officials! ” “ I once started a revolution myself. There were lots of guns and a lot of dying. You'd think I would have gotten some better benefits out of the whole thing but no, demoted back to door-opening servitude! ” “ ---Remember what? Are... are you my father? ” “ Are you god? Am I dead? ” “ I'M DEAD I'M DEAD OHMYGOD I'M DEAD! ” “ Thanks for giving me a second chance, (name). I really appreciate it. ” " Hey everybody! Check out my package! " " Let's get this party started! " " Glitching weirdness is a term of endearment, right? " " This time it'll be awesome, I promise! " " Look out everybody! Things are about to get awesome! " " Eww, what flavor is red? " "Where'd all my bullets go?" " Bullets are dumb. " " I need tiny death pellets! " " RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIVES! " " Oh, s/he's big...REALLY big! " " I am a tornado of death and bullets! " " Stop me before I kill again, except don't! " " There is no way this ends badly! " " This is why I was built! " " You call yourself a badass? " " Is it dead? Can- can I open my eyes now? " " I didn't panic! Nope, not me! " " Not so tough after all! " " I have gaskets tougher than you! " " That was me! I did that! " " Don't tell me that wasn't awesome! " " Wait, did I really do that? " " Aww! Now I want a snow cone. " " Freeze! I don't know why I said that. " " I can't feel my fingers! Gah! I don't have any fingers! " " Why do I even feel pain?! " " Why did they build me out of galvanized flesh?! " " That looks like it hurts! " " Oh, quit falling to pieces. " " Is that what people look like inside? " " Huh, robot's don't do that. " " Disgusting. I love it! " " It's about to get magical! " " You can't just program this level of excitement! " " Push this button, flip this dongle, voila! Help me! " " Square the I, carry the 1... YES! " " I have an IDEA! " " Round and around and around she goes! " " It's like a box of chocolates. " " If I had veins, they'd be popping out right now! " " Roses are red and/Violets are blue/Wait... how many syllables was that? " " Aww, I should've drawn tattoos on you! " " Tell me I'm the prettiest! " " Trouncy, flouncy... founcy... those aren't words. " " The robot is dead, long live the robot! " " Take these, gorgeous, you'll feel better! " " Some days, you just can't get rid of an obscure pop-culture reference. " " Oh darn, oh boy, oh crap, oh boy, oh darn. " " Do not look behind my curtain! " " I'm made of magic! " " Like those guys who made only one song ever. " " Everybody, dance time! Da-da-da-dun-daaa-da-da-da-dun-daaa! " " I brought you a present: EXPLOSIONS! " " Is this really canon? " " ... You're dead to me. " “ Nobody hurts my friends! " " Wubwubwub. Dubstep dubstep. Wubwubwubwub DROP! Dubstep! " " I'll stop talking when I'm dead! " " I'll die the way I lived: annoying! " " Come back here! I'll gnaw your legs off! " " This could've gone better! " " You look like something a skag barfed up! " " What's that smell? Oh wait, it's just you! " " Yo momma's so dumb, she couldn't think of a good ending for this 'yo momma' joke! " " You're one screw short of a screw! " " I bet your mom could do better! " " Good thing I don't have a soul! " " I'll never go back to the bad place! " " I have many regrets! " " Can I just say... yeehaw. " " You're the wub to my dub! " " So... does this make me your favorite? " " What are YOU doing down here? " " We're like those buddies in that one show! " " This is no time to be lazy! " " You can thank me later! " " You love me, right? " " You, me... keeping on... together? " " You versus me! Me versus you! Either way! " " Dance battle! Or, you know... regular battle. " " You wanna fight with me?! Put 'em up!.. Put 'em up? " " A million baddies, and you wanna hit me? Aww! " " I am so impressed with myself! " " Ha ha, this is in no way surprising! Ha ha! " " Don't bother with plastic surgery - there's NO fixing that! " " I am right behind you, Vault Hunting friend! " " I can do that too! ... Sorta... Except not. " " You jerks have NO idea what you're in for! " " I'm so glad I'm not one of those guys right now! " " YOU! ARE! SCARY! " " That is in no way disturbing. " " I did a challenge? I did a challenge! " " Glad I didn't mess that up. " " I feel... complete!.. That's weird. " " I actually did something right for once! " " Hmmm, the possibilities are an infinite recursion. " " Do any of these come with a new paint job? " " Which of these gives me my free will back? " " The moon is not enough! " " I'd do anything for a man/woman with a gun. " " At least I still have my teeth! " " Coffee? Black... like my soul. " " Crazy young whippersnappers...  " " I've finally got an electric personality! " " Wait, this isn't vegetable juice! " " Cool! Now we're both super-crazy-amazing! " " These are the best kind of cooties! " " Can I shoot something now? Or climb some stairs? SOMETHING exciting? " " Times like these, I really start to question the meaning of my existence. Then I get distra-hey! What's this? This looks cool! " " It would really stink if I couldn't control what I was thinking. Like, who wants to know that I'm thinking about cheese and lint, right? " " How does math work? Does this skin make me look fat? If a giraffe and a car had a baby, would it be called a caraffe? Life's big questions, man. " " Who needs memories when I can do all this cool stuff? Stuff that I currently am not doing! That's what I'd like to call a 'hint'. " " Does this mean I can start dancing? Pleeeeeeaaaaase? " " Ya know when there was that Vault monster scare? I had these friends, and boy times sure were scary! But, I didn't care because I had friends, and they were like... super-friends! And then they left me, but they saved the world and I was like 'I know those guys!' Even though they never came back after that I still knew they cared, because no one had ever been... nice to me before. ... What is this? My eye is like... leaking. " " It's really quiet... and lonely... (hums briefly) Also this 'stopped moving' thing makes me uncomfortable. It gives me time to stop and think... literally. I'VE STOPPED, AND I'M THINKING! IT HURTS ME! " " Oh. My. God. What if I'm like... a fish? And, if I'm not moving... I stop breathing? AND THEN I'LL DIE! HELP ME! HELP MEEEEE HEE HEE HEEE! HHHHHHHELP! " " Ahem, ahem. What's going on? Did I break something? " “ You hear me, (name)?! You killed my friends! You destroyed my product line! I am the last Claptrap in existence, AND I AM GOING TO TEABAG YOUR CORPSE! ” “ You think a door can stop me, (name)?! I was MADE to open doors! ” “ Dammit, (name) - how did you know stairs were my ONLY weakness?! Next to electrocution, and explosions, and gunfire, rust, corrosion, being kicked a lot, viruses, being called bad names, falling from great heights, drowning, adult onset diabetes, being looked at funny, heart attacks, exposure to oxygen, being turned down by women, and pet allergens! Your brilliance is matched only by your malevolence! ” “ I'm just gonna go ahead and cloak now. You can't hear me crying if I cloak! (sobbing) stairs, why did it have to be stairs? I'll never climb those stairs! ”

[another-sonic-blog]

I don't really mind how long you want to make it, but I've always wondered how clueless Shadow and Omega would be about modern life. Maybe Rouge introduces them to certain things?

Exploring 

2500k

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It was a cold morning on the streets of Tokyo. It was quiet as humans and Mobians began to walk outside their apartments, ready to face another day full of work. Team Dark was no exception either, they really didn't want to wake up but they needed to keep getting bread.

Team Dark was in their first mission in Japan and they needed to report to the main G.U.N. headquarters to get the full details about their mission.

"I am not wearing that," Shadow said as he was sitting down on the hotel room's sofa.

"You have to wear it, this ain't the USA where you can run around naked," Rouge was holding up one of many G.U.N's uniforms. She had to admit that many of them were ugly but she had picked this one especially for Shadow because it wasn't that bad-looking. "It's not that bad!"

Shadow let out a pout as he complained, "Why Omega won't wear one?"

"Because he is a freaking robot! G.U.N. doesn't make uniforms that big," Rogue rolled her eyes, she couldn't believe how childish the black hedgehog was.

"Hmf!"

"Just put it on and let's get going so we can catch the train!"

"Now I have to take public transportation? I always go on my bike," Shadow stood up from the sofa and with a fast motion he took the uniform from Rouge's grasp.

"Japan is a small country. Besides visitors, can't rent cars even less motorcycles."

"I hate it here-"

"I love it here-" Omega walked inside the room, carrying two bottles of motor oils. "People are really nice to robots here, they even had oil for breakfast for us."

Rouge smiled to herself, at least someone was enjoying this trip. She looked over to Shadow who looked more unsure about the new place. Shadow was more scared to explore and understand the outside world due that he still doubted humanity and Mobians as well. Unlike Shadow, Omega was quite the opposite. The robot was always curious about the world and he had a wild soul. He had his doubts about humanity as well, but he knew that not everyone was bad.

Maybe this trip could help both of them.

"Alright, boys, let's get going."

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To say that Shadow was overwhelmed was an understatement. He was feeling way too uncomfortable, not only that but people in here didn't know what personal space was.

"I just got hit in my shoulder three times! Can't at least people apologize?" Shadow hissed under his breath. His uniform was tight and it added more to his discomfort.

"Don't take it too personally," Rouge said as she dodged the people and Mobians passing by next to her. Of course, Japan's biggest train station was going to be busy from the morning to the night. "People need to get to their jobs on time and they need to rush and it's usual to bump into people ... It's a cultural thing."

"Try to adapt agent Shadow," Omega said.

Shadow quickly looked over to the robot and with a glared he said. "It's easy for you to say, people just fall in they bump into you."

They finally reached the selling ticket machine. It was just chaotic all over. As they waited in line they saw people go in and out of the train station. Some running and others minding their own business. Most of them were on their phones and other tourists just looked around lost. Shadow had a million questions. He saw that some people were just going inside the station without purchasing tickets. The black hedgehog looked over to Rouge and Omega who were talking and too busy looking over the wall map to even notice that Shadow was slowly walking away from them. In the distance, he kept looking at the Mobians who placed their wallets on a scanning machine and a small door open for them to enter the station.

"They just place their wallets in the scanner ... if it works for them, it should work for me!"

With that thought in mind, Shadow walked over the scanning machine. He took out his wallet and just as he did, he placed it on top of the scanner. It turned red and the small door in front of Shadow stopped him from entering the station. He tried again and again and people behind him were waiting and that just added to his anxiousness. The black hedgehog got angrier by the moment and he was about to punch the scanner until a Japanese male guard approached him.

”電車のチケットがありますか？” (Do you have a train ticket?)

The guard said that so fast that Shadow didn't know what he said. Not like it matters much because he didn't know any Japanese.

"My apologies, I don't know Japanese," Shadow tried to defend himself. He looked around and he saw that the line behind him was getting irritated and longer.  

The man seemed to be as confused as Shadow and very nicely, he tried to ask again.

”電車のチケットが-" (Do you have a train ticket-)

"はい、彼はチケットがあります。” (Yes, he was a ticket)

His salvation came in for him. Omega showed up speaking with the most badass Japanese he has ever heard since he heard Gaara in Naruto. Omega showed up three tickets and the guard bowed down and walked away. Omega inserted the tickets into the scanning machine and it turned green. Finally, the black hedgehog, the white bat, and the robot were let inside the station.

"Since when do you know Japanese?" Shadow asked the robot as he walked next to him.

"I inserted a Japanese software into my system before we left for this trip," Omega said. They walked some more until they reached the platform they needed to wait for their train.

"Are you sure this is the place Omega?" Rouge asked. She had used public transportation before but not such a complicated one.

"Google maps say this is the train we should take," Omega was confident and Rouge trusted the robot and his judgment. Now, the bat's attention was drawn towards the black one. He definitely wasn't enjoying himself, especially from what happened back there. Which reminded her ...

"What were you doing at the ticket scanner anyway?" Rouge asked.

Shadow's attention was now on Rouge, maybe she had the answer to his question. "I saw that the people were putting their wallets on their screen and they were granted passage. I tried it but it didn't let me ... maybe because I have an American wallet?"

Rouge was trying really hard not to laugh at Shadow's naiveness. She puts the thought away as she knew that Shadow was just trying to understand the unknown world around him.

"It wasn't their wallet Shadow," Rouge said. "A lot of Japanese people and Mobians have train cards that allow them to take the train whenever they want, all year long ... and it just happens that most people have them in their wallets or phones for fast and easy access."

"Oh..."

That was everything that Shadow said. He didn't understand anything that was going on. However, he had to admit that he was intrigued about the place. It was a love-hate relationship with the country. Love because he was curious and hate because he didn't understand it ... and he dislikes everything that he couldn't understand.

Their train finally arrived and Shadow regretted it all. It got packed extremely fast and most of the sits were taken except for a few that were a different color. Most of the seats were blue while these were yellow. Shadow was about to sit in one of them but Omega, who was closer to them, took all the seats for himself as his big size didn't let him only take one.

"Omega, you have to stand up," Rouge said as people began to look at them strangely. More and more began to get in and Shadow was getting more impatient.

"Why do I have to stand up?" Omega said as he looked over the white bat.

"Those seats are reserved for the elder, people with disabilities and pregnant women," Rouge responded as she mentally apologizes to the other people for Omega's 'rudeness.'

"Oh ..." Omega suddenly stood up and with the loudest voice he said,

"みなさんごめんなさい! (Everyone, I am sorry!)"

He then proceeds to bow and Rouge just embarrassedly face palmed herself.

The bat thought that everything was going to get better as soon the train started moving but it wasn't like that. It was crowded as it is and she was thankful that Omega was there to provide her some breathing space. If she was having a bad time, she couldn't imagine how bad must Shadow be at the moment. She looked over to the black hedgehog who was as well holding into Omega for his dear life.  

Shadow looked pale and ready to faint but even so, Rouge was surprised at how he was keeping himself together from pushing people away.

CLICK

The attention of Team Dark was directed towards a young red cat girl. She was wearing a blue high school uniform and she was embarrassedly holding her phone in front of her. One of Rouge's fear was that something like this would happen. In Japan, all phones come with a camera flashing sound and the sound cannot be lowered since there are high rates of stalking in the country. However, the girl didn't take a picture of her nor Omega ... but Shadow.

"Of course ... Shadow is a handsome boy in uniform."

Rouge turned to look at the black hedgehog's reaction and she was afraid that he was going to snap at the young girl.

"Do you want a picture?" Shadow said loud enough for her to hear. The catgirl looked down to look at her shoes as if she was being scolded by the black one.

"写真を撮りたいですか？" (Do you want to take a picture?)

Omega stepped in with his Japanese and the catgirl immediately looked at them in disbelief. She nodded up and down very excitedly as slowly made her way to Team Dark. She moved across a few people until she reached the young handsome hedgehog. She took out her phone and leaned closer to him a little. However, Shadow seeing that he couldn't see himself in the camera, got closer to her and the catgirl mentally yelled as she never thought she would be this close to such a handsome guy.

Rouge smiled proudly at Shadow. For him, an action like this was very normal actually. In the USA, he had his small fangirl group and many of them asked them if they could take pictures with him. Shadow, who wasn't one for fame, really didn't mind. He saw that it made girls happy and that was all he cared about.

The red catgirl took a picture and through the entire train ride, she had a big smile on her face.

.

.

.

Finally, they reached the Japanese headquarters of G.U.N. Rouge couldn't wait to just go in and get this mission started. She had enough already of her two idiots in Japan, she liked the country but she didn't want to explain certain things ... like before.

"Look, after this mission, we should come here and watch a movie," Omega said as he pointed at a small building. Rouge, who was already ahead of them had walked back as something caught up the robot and black hedgehog's attention.

"Doesn't this look too small to be a movie theater?" Shadow asked. Even if he wasn't enjoying his trip, he could say that the trip was worth it if he got to see the new Pokemon movie. "Where can we see which movies are available?"

"I'll go inside the building, maybe there's some information there," Rouge walked away. This movie theater was very conveniently placed a few meters away from G.U.N. and watching a movie after work didn't sound bad at all ... even if she didn't understand what they were saying.

But as soon as Rouge walked in ... she walked out.

"Oh," Omega said in confusion. "I don' understand this ..."

"Alright, we let's keeping going!" Rogue screamed at her boys as she dragged them away from the place.

"Hey! I wanted to see if the new Pokemon movie was out!" Shadow complained and he could have slipped away if it wasn't because Rouge was holding into him by his very uncomfortable uniform.

"Rouge was that a-"

"No!"

Omega was interrupted by the bat. She was usually very open about these kinds of things but that was crossing her limits.

Yes, that was a movie theater ... for adults only.

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.

.

She was surprised that G.U.N was this big. Well, it was small but for Japanese standards it was big.

They reached the Commander's office and they were greeted nicely. The Commander explained the mission and like the top agents they were, they were ready to start with it.

"I greatly appreciate Commander Johnson for giving me his top agents for this difficult mission," the old man said. G.U.N. had headquarters in every country. In Japan, it was Commander Tanaka who was in charge of it.

"This is a really important mission," Rouge said. "Thank you for the trust and we will get started right away."

The three of them bowed and wanted to leave the room. Team Dark was just ready to get this over with so they could go back home. If they had to do something out of their comfort zone again, they might explode ... except for Omega, he was enjoying himself too much.

"Wait!" Commander Tanaka stopped them and the commander changed his expression as soon as Team Dark faced him.

"Before you leave ... I must tell you something," Commander Tanaka's voice changed. His voice was serious as well as his expression.

What was so important that he had completely changed his personality? An extra mission? Missing information? A dangerous person would be after them?

Team Dark was prepared for everything.

"Don't forget to do your mandatory dance exercise before you leave the building!"

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A/N: So this was so fun to write. However, it was a bit complicated to think of the right setting for the story. Since I live in modern times and I am so used to it, it was a bit difficult to come up with scenarios. So I began to think of my personal experiences and the times when I had to learn something 'common' in life. I used to live in Japan and my Japanese friends introduced me and taught me a lot of things. So I used that experience to write this. There are some many other situations I would like to write with Team Dark, they have so much potential. I hope that this is more or less what you wanted! Thank you for such a nice prompt request!

Also I am answering prompts request as they come. So if I haven’t answered yours, just please be patient I’ll work it as soon as I can ♥️

[crushedbyhyperbole]

Disco Ball Diva

A/N: For @buckyshelves Merry Christmas, I hope you enjoy this and have a great festive holiday

To @bucky-smiles​ for organising this secret Santa gift exchange, you’re awesome and so, so kind

Also... thank you to my friend Haz who beta read this for me.  You are always so supportive of my writing and I love you

Summary:  You’re inappropriate, sassy, have snazzy powers, and now you’re an Avenger-in-training.  Not everyone appreciates your blasé attitude, and when a surveillance mission goes south you’re thrown together with one hot brooding super soldier.  It doesn’t help that you can’t stop ogling his bum.

Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x Reader w/ powers

Word Count: 7k.  I actually feel bad that it’s so long.

Warnings:  Violence, gun violence, Bucky kills people, mentions of blood and injury, bad language (which is a given for me), some sexual tension (light) but mostly just reader is an asshat XD

The Avengers compound is not like you imagined it.  Or maybe it is but you haven’t found any of the secret stuff yet.  Hidden jet hangers under the basketball court, labs in the basement, glass cases full of superhero suits.  Wait.  That’s the freakin’ X-Men.

Still, it’s nothing like you hoped.  The conference rooms are boring, obviously, because meetings are the epitome of dull. The communal lounge and kitchen are both boring; there’s no espresso machine that doubles as a drone, no fridge that transforms into sentry bot, there isn’t even a SodaStream.  Yawn! You don’t even need to see the fitness suite to know that it’s not a place you want to visit, and you’re not allowed below the ground floor yet.  Talk about not trusting the noob.

Your room is a vision of extreme lacklustre, but you only moved in yesterday, so, no redecorating just yet, save for the peace lily your brother gave you.

Congrats on your new job and home by the way, here’s a half-dead plant I had but couldn’t be bothered to look after.  Now it’s yours.  Enjoy!

Your super power is definitely not green thumbs, nurturing life, healing, or anything even a tiny bit supportive.  You can’t fly, don’t have super strength, speed, or a crazy-good aim.  There’s not a green rage-monster just below the surface waiting to erupt and smash things.  Well, if someone steals your cookies you might have to choke a bitch but hey, rainbows are cool, right?  Super distracting, like oh hey, what’s all this shiny shit flashing around?  Oh dayum, I totally didn’t see that badass super warrior coming to kick my ass.

You swallow hard.  The small conference room feels like an interrogation room despite the polished wood table and plush leather chairs.  Of four sets of eyes that are currently watching you, only one pair is encouraging.

Tony Stark.  The guy who recruited you.  Took you from a life of selling hotdogs on street corners in the City and apartment sharing with a crazy cat lady called Angie who you found on Craigslist.  You had nothing against crazy cat ladies, per se, but you would prefer it if the pissy smell was optional.  Angie had opted in, hence why you jumped at the chance to opt out.  Ugh.

“Rainbows?”  The scowly but buff brunette with the dreamy blue eyes and robotic arm, scoffs mockingly.  “You project rainbows?”

The equally buff blonde who you suspect might be Captain America (or maybe his stunt double) snickers, his head lowered to hide his amusement.  Does Captain America have a stunt double, for like, TV appearances and meetings with officials, and stuff?  You’ll ask later.  Right now, you’re annoyed.

“Oh, I’m sorry, fist-of-victory!”  You snap your fingers like the queen you are.  “Am I too snazzy for you?  Do my rainbows ruin the whole Neanderthal vibe you got going on there?”

Loud snorts and chuckles pull you back.  The redheaded vixen you know already as Black Widow is pinching her nose to stifle her laughter, and Tony is looking to the heavens in askance but emotional stability is not forthcoming.

“Wow.”  The brunette says flatly.

“Fist of victory.” Tony ponders, eyes twinkling.  “I like that.”  He levels an amused gaze at you, rolling his next words around in his mouth.  “Manchurian candidate is a little out-dated, wouldn’t you say, Barnes? Ready for an upgrade?”

Oh shit!  Your eyes get big.  The brunette is none other than the infamous Winter Soldier.  You should have known by the arm.  Show no weakness!  Your brain screams.

“What’s the official title for that skill, you have?” Steve Rogers has gotten his face to cooperate, now there’s no trace of a smirk.  “Light manipulation?”  

“Walking disco ball.” You put on the light show again, manipulating the effects so the lights are dancing across the, now stormy grey, eyes of one Sergeant Barnes.

“It’s definitely distracting.”  Natasha says objectively.  “Could be useful.”

“See!  That’s what I said!”  You punch the air, sending the lights into a frenzy.

“I have a theory.” Tony is playing his cards close to his chest still.  “That’s why y/n is here.  She’s agreed to work with us, and at the very least she can be a supportive member of the team.”

“Team, frickin’, playahhh!”  You holler, earning a concerned look from Rogers and a downright obnoxious groan from Barnes.  “What?  What you complaining at?  You fucking love me already!”

The truth was that you didn’t know how your ability worked.  You could feel it when you did your thang, like the hairs on the back of your neck stood on end and the air in your hand felt stiff and substantial.

Better not talk about hands full of substantial stiff things around grandad Tony, he might kick the bucket.

You could manipulate the amount of reflections in your light show by making the air heavier, make them move, dance, even adjust the size of them a little.   Agreeing to work with The Avengers had been a no brainer; you get paid, get a place to stay that isn’t full of the stench of sadness and cat piss, and you get to find out more about your ability.  Win, win, win.

+++ A couple of weeks later +++

“You really expect me to take Rainbow Brite on this mission?”  Barnes has his arms crossed across his chest, refusal crinkling his brown and pursing his lips into a thin line.  The guy looks hot in tac gear.  One bicep straining against the material, the other is obviously free and oh-so-fucking-awesome.  Thighs tight under those black tac pants, thigh holster accenting the flex of muscle as he shifts his weight.  Wait-what!?

“Wait a fucking minute!”  You squawk.  “Rainbow Brite?  Oh, hell no!”  You march up to him, similarly decked out in black gear that makes you look like some tiny recruit in ill-fitting body armour instead of badass like him.

There’s a smirk on his perfect mouth now, dusky pink lips lop-sided with amusement, and the twinkle in his eyes is more than a little alluring.  What the fuck?

“Huh.”  You stop your tirade, blinking, baffled.  He’s playing with you.  Trying to get you pissed so you’ll refuse to go, or maybe he wants you to go so you’ll make a fool of yourself and Tony will see you’re not useful. Too many mind-games already, you don’t have the patience for this shit, so you go with an insult instead.  “If I’m Rainbow fucking Brite then that makes you Twink.  Dink!”

“Well, he does epitomise my sparkling personality.”  Sardonic, deadpan.  It’s classic brooding Barnes and you’re almost proud that he got an 80’s pop culture reference.  Almost.

“And they did rename him Mr fucking Glitters back in 2014.”  You pout, adopting his stance, arms crossed.

“Perfect!”  Tony pops m&ms into his mouth, turning away dismissively.  “Rainbow Brite and Mr Glitters it is.  Head to the carpool, there’s a vehicle waiting for you both.”

There was no getting away from this mission.  You’d grumbled, griped, whined, and begged Tony to send you with anyone but Broody Barnes but the Iron Man was true to his alter ego, he did not budge.

You are about to take a few pot shots at him in the insults department when Barnes’s voice comes over the earpiece you have already been fitted with.

“Earth to disco ball. Get in the damn car already.”

“It’s disco diva to you, giant cocksicle.”

He laughs at that and is still grinning when you slide into the passenger seat beside him.

“You’ve got some mouth on you, kid.”  Was that acceptance?  Admiration? Whatever it was it looked good on him.

“Yeah, you know you want my mouth.”  It sounded better in your head but now that it’s out it can’t be taken back.  Barnes looks a little frowny but at least he’s got nothing to say so you can quietly die in peace.

Can someone cringe so much they die?  You might find out.

The mission is surveillance.  Low-key observations of a facility out in Nova Scotia that makes products for iGoddess, a beauty company owned and run by Gabrielle Porter, the niece of one Alexander Pearce, crime syndicate king-pin and scumbag extraordinaire.

You know the company; you buy their stuff.  Well, you do now you can afford it and it’s not wasted under the scent of cat urine and bleach. ��How can a company so devoted to making women feel special and empowered be mixed up with drugs, weapons and human trafficking?  Fucking bullshit, that’s what it is.

Bucky had ditched the car in the parking lot of a lake-side leisure and visitors centre about fifteen miles away, and with gaudy waterproof outerwear over your tac gear, you had begun the hike that would set you smack-bang in the middle of nowhere good.  Posing as hikers had been Tony’s brief but you’re cold and bored, and your body aches from being on the solid ground.

You’re both lay just behind the crest of a hill a little way away from your target building.  Bucky mutters his observations into his comms as you look through your own binoculars trying to see what he’s looking at.  He’s talking guard numbers and movements, the weapons they carry, security features and people entering or leaving the facility. It’s no use, you’re not cut out for this.  Surveillance is soul destroying.  You’d rather be interred in Tony’s kitchen, at least there’s coffee there.

Not even an hour in and you’re itching to get up and move around.  The hike had gotten your blood pumping but now you’re going stir-crazy, joints tingling with the need for motion.

Boring.  Boring.  But at least you can entertain yourself.  Where there’s light there’s beauty and you tease the air through your gloves, finding that your skin doesn’t need to be bare for you to create the effect.  Well whadd’ya know.

“There’s movement.” Bucky warns.  “Looks like some of the guards are exiting the compound.”

You snort, they’re probably bored too.

“A Jeep and a couple of motorbikes, moving quickly.”

“Sounds like they’re going home.”  You mumble, focused on the lights in your hand.

“They’re headed this way.” He curses.  “Grab your- What the HELL are you doing?”

Bucky tackles you to the ground from where you were on your knees almost at the hill’s crest.

“Asshole!”  You’re trying to get away from him but he pins you to the ground.

“I’m the asshole?” He complains as he rolls off you, sliding down the hill on his ass, shoving his gear unceremoniously into his backpack. “Mission compromised.”

“What happened?” Tony’s disembodied voice doesn’t sound happy.

“We were spotted.”  At the bottom of the hill, Bucky starts picking a path through the rocks and small fissures hidden by the wild grass and heathers. A quick glance back tells him you’re not following; you’re caught.

“Uh, hi, guys.”  You chuckle nervously as one of the guards levels an assault rifle at you.  “Would you believe we’re winners of a free weekend iGoddess Spa?”

Bucky is livid.  If it had just been him, he could have taken them out and escaped, but, no.  Tony had to insist that he bring you, show you the ropes, look after you.  Babysit you.

He snorts.  You don’t need a minder you need to be put in a padded room where you can’t inflict any more of your weird bullshit on him. Fucking rainbows.  What kind of skill is that, other than one that gets you caught?

Eight hours ago you were both doing great.  There’d been some small-talk in the car, he’d opened up a little and you’d responded. Even on the hike over you’d been great, your filthy mouth was a source of much amusement for him, and you’d listened. His instructions were followed close enough to the letter, and he was happy.  Everything was good.

Now it’s all fallen to shit and he’s locked up in a heavy-duty restraint chair that brings back memories of dark places and dark times for him.  To his side, you’re slumped forward in a regular wooden chair, cable-ties binding your wrists and ankles to the wood, pulling at your skin, making your hands and feet turn blue.  How the hell are you both supposed to get out of this?

He’s watching the movements of your chest that tell him you’re still breathing.  The cut on your head has stopped bleeding but you’re drooling blood-tainted saliva down your grey rash-guard.  Both of you had been stripped down to your undergarments and checked for hidden weapons.  He was the first to be incapacitated as they’d used you as leverage, holding a gun to your head until he complied, stripped, and submitted to the chair. When they’d took away your gear you’d fought and Bucky had seen red; he’d strained against the chair until the butt of a gun to the head had put a stop to that.  When he came to you were out cold, beaten and bloody.  How hard had you fought?

Your feet and hands are turning purple now.  The weight of your body pulling the restraints against your skin is making the plastic ties dig deep, cutting off the circulation.

“Y/n?”  Bucky hisses, hoping the noise doesn’t prompt the guards to come back.  “Y/n! Wake up!”

The room you’re in looks like an interview room.  Two-way mirror, camera in the corner, reinforced door with heavy-duty locks that were strangely not engaged.  It’s grey and cold, and the only things in the room are the two chairs and you two. The device Bucky is locked into is bolted into the floor; a permanent feature, like they expected him or maybe Steve. He tests the chair again.  It creaks but doesn’t give.  He’d have to really put some brute strength into it to break out, and that would create too much noise.  He’d wait.

“Y/n!”  A little louder now, and you stir.

He keeps talking to you, just bullshit words, what he wants for dinner, what film he’s going to watch when he’s home safe.  Anything to help draw you back to consciousness.

“You wana watch a film with me, y/n?”  He thought for sure you’d tell him to go fuck himself.

You moan, head lolling as you come back to him.

“Hey!  Rainbow Brite!”

“Fuck you.”  It’s a whisper but he’ll take it.

“There she is.”  He allows himself a relieved smile.  “C’mon, sweetheart.  I need you to sit up for me.  Take the weight off those ties before there’s any permanent damage.”

It takes a few more moments before you can shuffle yourself properly into the chair, then you’re flexing your hands and feet to get the blood moving again.

“Oh-god-it-hurts-so-fucking-bad!”  You are practically wailing as the pins and needles sensation in your extremities reaches a peak.  The slightest movement now sends a cacophony of intense pain into your limbs.

“It’ll be over soon.” Bucky sooths.

“Why are you being nice to me after I got us caught?”  You eye him suspiciously, flapping your hands to rush the blood into your fingers.  Rip the band aid off.  “Is this some kind of prank?  Ohhhhhhh!  This is an initiation isn’t it?  Oh, I see. Where’s Iron Doosh?  Hey!  Tony!”

“Would you shut up?  This is real.  We’re really captured.”  Bucky hisses.

“Tony Stank, Skank, Spah-hank.”  You sing-song as you struggle against your restraints, examining your bound feet through spread knees.  “I hope this is one of the chairs from his good dining set.”  You stand, leaning forward and centring your weight above your bent knees.

“What are you doing?”

“Just need to…”  You shuffle over to the mirror.

“No, y/n, wait!” Bucky begs.  “Don’t break the glass.”  His frantic expression says the rest.  Your feet are bare and you’ll shred yourself to ribbons.

“What?  You’re crazy.  Why would I do that?”  You chuckle, amused that he’s so worried.  “There’s no one in there.”  You wink at him.  “They’d be in here by now if there were.”

You shuffle a bit more and grunt as you throw yourself backward to the ground.  The chair cracks but doesn’t break.

“Fuck!”  You struggle some more, grunting and groaning like a butch female tennis player in a grand slam.  One of the arms loosens and you fight against the wood until you get your left hand free, then you’re reaching into your hair for a bobby pin to jam into the clasp of the cable tie on your right arm.

Moments later, you’re free and rushing to Bucky who is fighting against his own restraints. There’s sweat beading on his bare chest and his hair is sticking to his forehead.  A quick swipe of your hand clears his brow and he stills, watching you as you search the chair for whatever mechanism has him trapped.

“There’s a big red lever at the back.”  You muse. “You think it’s an ejector seat?” A cheeky wink.  “If I sit in your lap we can both go for a ride.”  You don’t have time for giggling and flirtation, but you do it anyway.

“Y/n.”  Bucky chastises lightly.

“What?  This is every girl’s wet dream.  Every, damn, girl.”  You mumble as you grip the handle.  “And I can’t even enjoy it.”

“Just pull the damn thing already.  We don’t have time to mess around.”

“Pity.”  You tug the lever and a loud hiss fills the room, pressure releasing from the chair.

Bucky is on his feet and at the door before you make three steps.  He’s rubbing his right forearm where the metal clamps had bitten into his flesh, there’s blood there too, long ago dried.

“There’s movement out there.”  He has his ear to the door.  “I need a weapon, we need our gear, and we need a vehicle.”

“I need some chocolate and bottle of wine.”

“What?”

“Are we not making a shopping list?”

Bucky rolls his eyes and grabs your wrist.  “C’mon.”

With the door cracked open, Bucky can see movement at the end of the corridor; there’s a security room which is promising for retrieving your gear, but not if you want to avoid being seen.

“Stay behind me.”  He pushes you towards his back.

You look down at his bum. “No problem.”  You sigh and then you’re moving, your hand on his bare back so you can feel where he’s moving next.

Bucky suddenly shoves you down into a squat, shushing you with a finger held against his lips.  The way he moves is like water, smooth and forceful, carrying the momentum of his body towards a lone guard who has paused at the corner by the security room.  How he hasn’t seen you is a miracle but the man doesn’t even hear Bucky until the his own knife is slipped from its sheath and into the his temple. There’s no sound, no gurgling, not even much blood.  Bucky lowers the body to the floor and cleans the knife on the pants of the dead man.

Looking at him now, you can see why people fear him.  His expression is cold, calculating, and focused.  It’s necessary, the distance he puts between himself and the act of killing.  Even when Bucky was him, there was always a distance; a gap between him and his orders.  Now the killing is his choice and he has to live with that, there’s no excuse of mind control now.  This is all him.

The security room has one guard inside who is overpowered moments after Bucky opens the door.

Fucking amateurs, you think.  Does that room not have cameras that cover the door and surrounding corridors?

Turns out that it does and the reason the guard hadn’t seen you was because he was sexting his girlfriend.

“Sexting?”

“Yeah.  Like sex role play and talking dirty over text.”  You snort.  “Jeez, you’re old.”

“What can I say? You’re broadening my horizons.” He winks then and it’s so out of place in this grim situation that you laugh nervously.  “Sounds fun.”

“Well don’t take tips from this guy.”  You wave his phone in the air loosely.  “He’s fucking terrible at it.”

“What’s bad about it?”

You’re not sure if he means to ask that, he’s busy trying to get outside communication through the phones which seem to be keycode protected and also checking through the security feeds to see if he can find your gear and a way out of this for you both; he’s clearly distracted.  At least he’s happy now that he has a pair of handguns and a pair of knives, no weapons for you because you haven’t completed your firearms training yet.  But let’s face it, who would arm you anyway?  You were a disaster waiting to happen.

“He’s a bit of a wham-bam-thankyou-ma’am kinda guy.”  You chuckle. Bucky is going to regret starting you off down this line of conversation.  “His poor woman has probably never experienced even mediocre sex with this schmuck if his sext skills are anything to go by.”

“Too eager to bury the bone?”  Bucky sounds distant, but he is listening to you as he checks drawers for weapons, keys and anything else that might be useful.  God knows your gear was nowhere to be found.

“Check it.”  You hop up on the desk near him and scroll through the laughable chat.  You feel slightly guilty reading this guy’s private shit but he’s dead so he isn’t going to care.  Reading from the chat, you do fake voices.  “So she’s like ‘hey baby, you free tonight?  I got something for you.’ Peach emoji, cat emoji.  And he’s like ‘you off your period? Can we bang?’  I mean, what the fuck dude?”

Bucky is smirking when you look at him.  “What did she say?”  He straps both thigh holsters to his almost naked body.  It’s comical how he’s gearing up from salvaged stuff wearing only a pair of skin-tight spandex shorts that leave nothing to the imagination. Once Bucky is packing (in more ways than one, now) you have to force your eyes elsewhere.

“’Yeah, baby! I missed you so bad.  Can’t wait to be in your arms again.’  She just wants lovin’ y’know?”  You spoke the line in a soft, breathy voice.  Fake, of course.

“And what did he say?” Bucky is checking the monitors one last time before he moves to the door.

“You like a bit of sexting? Huh, Barnes?”  You smirk, eying him mischievously.  “Living vicariously through the sexting chronicles of Captain Dick-Down over there?”

“Just looking to know what not to do if the opportunity for sexting ever arises.”  It’s light-hearted and completely unlike the grumpy Bucky you’re used to.  Maybe there was something in the air; sex pollen or something.  That’s totally a thing.  “C’mon.”  He says after a moment, eyes twinkling with mirth, soft lips pulling up to the side in a cute smile.  “Let’s get the hell out of here.”

It’s comedy gold, the pair of you running the halls of an apparently secret part of the factory, him in his tight little shorts and you in your panties and spandex t-shirt over a sports bra that makes your rack look like a uni-boob.  You awkwardly tug your rash-guard down over your ass whenever Bucky is behind you and you’re thankful you didn’t wear a thong though that would be better than skid marks.  God, you hoped you’d not shat yourself when they beat you.

You barely encounter anyone until you’re almost at the warehouse; Bucky is so stealthy that even with you hindering him, he only has to subdue one foreman and drag you into a cleaning supply closet once, to avoid a pair of patrolling guards.  Not that you’re complaining, being squashed up against an almost naked super soldier gave you endless thrills, even if he was all stiff and awkward about it.

Bucky stalls before the double doors that lead to the warehouse.  There’s a heavy plastic strip curtain over the exit too, it’s almost opaque with age and hinders your view of what is beyond the meshed safety-glass of the door’s small windows.

“They know we’re coming.” He whispers to you, mere inches away. “There’s a lot of them out there and I can’t keep you safe if you disobey orders.  So, please,” he begs, “please do as I tell you.”

He begs so sweetly, you think, blushing.  But you’re not one for passing an opportunity for inappropriate comments.

“I’ll be a good girl, Daddy.”  You bat your eyelashes, feigning innocent.  “Cross my heart and hope to die.”

“Really?”  Bucky doesn’t know whether to blush or be annoyed. You never seem to take anything seriously; it’s always a joke, or something you can twist to your amusement. He gets doubly serious.  “If you die, it’s on me.  You think I haven’t lost enough people over the course of my very long life?  You think I want to wash your blood off my skin later tonight?  Bury you alongside all the other people lost to some fight or other in the name of SHIELD or the Avengers?  I can’t save you if you don’t want to be saved.”

You watch him as he fervently tries to convey the dire nature of your situation, desperate to make you understand that he doesn’t want you to die here, he cares.  His eyes are piercing and your heart is a ricocheting bullet in your chest.  What if you don’t make it out ok?  What if this is it for you?  Both of you? Suddenly, you’re acutely aware that Bucky Barnes, Winter Soldier, Fist of HYDRA come Fist of Victory, has cleared himself a little spot in your fucked-up soul, and is there to stay. You don’t want him to get killed because of you, but there’s nothing you can do, you’re not trained for this, or at all really.

You nod once, not trusting your voice in that moment.  You could choke on your words or you could vomit all over yourself.  It’s a lottery, so you say nothing.

“Good girl.”  He gives your shoulders a reassuring squeeze. “Stay behind me.  Be quick, keep low, don’t hesitate, and for Christ’s sake no disco ball.”  There’s a small smile tempting the corners of his lips, like he’s saying he forgives you for getting you both into this mess.  “Ok, sweetheart, lets go.”

Out in the warehouse there’s a whole host of guards and workers, patrolling and overseeing shipments being loaded into lorries.  It look like it’s important, and probably why the majority of the facility is clear of security staff; the merchandise is being moved.

It’s a mad dash, crouching low as you ghost around the edge of the warehouse.  The huge rows of stacks are packed full of boxes and crates, further obscuring your movement around the area.  Bucky is silent, especially since he’s barefoot; he’s every bit the assassin he’s hyped to be, but you can’t take him seriously padding around almost naked with the top of his crack showing and his junk all jiggly in the front.

A radio crackles to life. Three personel down.  Prisoners have escaped.  Cameras last caught them headed your way.  

They must have found the bodies.

“They’re in here somewhere.” A man says, loud and authoritative. “Search the rows, shoot to kill. They’re not low-life mob goons, they’re Avengers and can’t be allowed to live.”

Well that settles that, you think, gone are the chances of mere bodily harm.  It’s death or death.

You watch in awe as Bucky scales a nearby stack to stalk one of the patrolling guards.  When his opportunity arises he yanks the man up by the throat, snapping his neck in the process.  You can’t help but admire that metal arm, so sleek and powerful.  You groan, light and lusty, earning you a concerned look from the owner of said appendage.

Killing that guard has yielded an assault rifle, another knife and another handgun.  You’d think Bucky would be too smart to arm you but apparently he’s not.  Silently he points to his eye and then to the gun where he shows you how to turn off the safety, puts the gun in your hand and moves behind you to adjust your grip. He aims for you, pressing his chest against your back and you swear you can feel his junk against your ass.  Once he’s satisfied that you aren’t going to injure yourself, he’s gone from behind you, crouching low at the end of the row.

He grabs another guard and drags him backward.  The struggle is louder than he would have liked, and the man got out a partial shout before his throat was closed forever but Bucky is hopeful that he can thin the numbers down enough to make it possible to get you into a truck and away safely.

Bucky shoves the newest body under the nearest stack and beckons you to him.  You both move like a two-carriage train, he’s the engine and you’re the caboose following in his wake.  He only leaves you to commit murder but you feel lost when he’s gone, cold even.  There’s something alluring about the way he uses his body and your mind drifts to other carnal things.

A hand on your shoulder makes you jump.  There’s more of a commotion going on in the warehouse now, not just the sounds of men moving goods and silently searching for two prisoners.  There are massive amounts of footfall, boots hitting the concrete at speed; bringing in reinforcements from outside.

Bucky is about to whisper in your ear when the squeal of a megaphone pierces the air; he stills with his lips almost touching your skin before pulling back with a frown.

“Sergeant Barnes?” Bucky knows that voice, he’d heard it for years, worked with it, even obeyed it on occasion.  “Save the girl.  Turn yourself in.”

You shake your head, panicked, urgent.  Don’t leave me, your eyes are saying.

A noise nearby draws Bucky’s attention and he suddenly forces you to the ground under a stack where he slots himself immediately after; the security team are searching for you, stealthily stalking the rows.  It’s cramped and dusty, the bottom shelf above you so close you can barely breathe without your back brushing the metal supports.  How Bucky fits is beyond you, the man is a beefcake, all bulk and magnificently defined muscle.  Thinking of him naked is the only thing that keeps you from succumbing to claustrophobia. Something brushes your hand and you jolt, eyes snapping to meet his.  He grasps your hand properly and gives it a reassuring squeeze.  In your chest, something gives.  Maybe your permafrost heart is thawing, maybe you’re about to have a stroke, maybe you really like him.

When the coast is clear, Bucky pulls you free and you emerge into a different row, one with fewer boxes, one you’ll likely be spotted in.  You can just see the massive doorway of the warehouse, double sliding doors like a hangar, several half loaded trucks and maybe forty men with body armour and guns.  One guy in the middle is wearing a full-face helmet with a white skull etched across the features.

“Holy shit!  Is that Punisher?”  You hiss before Bucky can clamp his hand over your mouth, the warning look on his face is stern as he leans in to you.

“Crossbones.”  He corrects you, barely audible despite the proximity.  You still don’t know who that is but he’s totally not as cool as the Punisher, so it doesn’t matter.

His hand is still over your mouth but there’s no point in struggling, you couldn’t break free of him even if you tried, so you push your tongue out and squirm it against his palm, making him recoil in disgust.  Your chuckle is silent and his frown turns to the ghost of a wry smile before his attention is fully back on the man he calls Crossbones.

Bucky is taciturn at the best of times but he’s in full diagnostic mode now, assessing the situation. His eyes flicker around the warehouse from yet another new position.  It seems like he’s trying to get you closer to the trucks but you suspect that’s what Crossbones expects.  There are more men closer to the trucks too and Bucky has already had to kill another two in the latest relocation.  The missing men haven’t gone unnoticed and Crossbones is issuing orders, plugging the gaps so you can’t escape.

“I will find you Barnes.” Crossbone’s voice sounds wet through the megaphone, like he’s salivating with excitement at the prospect of getting his hands on you both again.  “If you turn yourself in, maybe I’ll let the girl live.”

Bucky’s eyes are downcast, like he’s actually considering it, but the moment passes and Bucky’s resolve hardens.  He drags you away towards the end of the row.

“The end of this row has a direct line of sight to the exit.  I need a distraction.  Can you do that for me?”  He whispers.

You nod, lips set in determination.  “One disco ball distraction coming right up.”

“On my mark.”

The fluorescent strip lights overhead create more than enough light for you to use.  With your right hand flat against Bucky’s left shoulder blade and your left manipulating the air to create a huge show of dancing lights, you move in tandem.  Bucky steps out of hiding, keeping you just behind him with his metal arm, he surges forward squeezing off four shots.  The way his arm snaps to aim so quickly is astounding, like he has a targeting chip implanted in his brain.  Who knows, maybe he does.  Four men fall and remain still.  Another three shots, then another two and he’s pulling you into another row at a crouching run to the opposite end as he discards the empty gun and pulls out another. He’s saving the assault rifle for Crossbones.

“Again.”  He instructs gruffly.  “Can you get their eyes?”

“It’s not an exact science this, you know?”  You huff and he seems to know that you’re saying you’ll try your best.  Of course you’d try, but you don’t know much about your power, even after the few months you’d been training with the team.  If it meant you both got out of this alive, you’d flash your tits at the enemy for Christ’s sake.

You emerge again, him with the gun in his metal hand this time, stepping out with you at his back. This time they are ready for you and they start firing before Bucky gets off his first shots.  He makes a dash for a fork-lift with a huge pallet of crates sat at floor level.  He shoots his rounds in threes until the 9-round magazine is done.  The gun is discarded as you both slide behind the cover of the pallets.  Machine guns rattle, pummelling the crates with round after round.  Bucky prays the crates don’t contain munitions.

“I make fourteen down. Twenty-two left.”  His breathing smooth where your is ragged.  You curse yourself for being so unfit that even a tiny bit of stress and exertion leaves you heaving air like a couch potato made to climb stairs.  “Crossbones is a problem.”

“What do we do now?”

Bucky has two handguns, four knives and an assault rifle, you have one gun and your rainbows.  This isn’t going to go well, you think.

“You’re going to hide over there and watch the rear.”  He points to your left.

You smirk.  Now isn’t’ the time for joking.

“I’m going to thin the crowd some more and, if I can, take Crossbones out.”  He looks determined but ridiculous in his underpants, dusted with dirt and debris from the floor that’s stuck to the slightest bit of moisture on his skin.  “This might not work.  Run to the left, hide in the stacks again, stay down and don’t expose yourself.”

You nod and he readies himself to break cover.  The shooting has stopped now and it sounds like the guards are changing positions again. His muscles clench, coiling ready to spring.

“Wait!”  You stop him with a hand on his arm, the metal is unnervingly cool.  Tension builds.  “I wanna fuck you until you pass out.”

“Ummmm.”  Bucky blinks, eyebrows raised in surprise but he’s smiling.  “You’re serious?”

“Yeah, well, no, but, uhhhh.”  You splutter, this hadn’t gone well at all.  “I couldn’t let you go without telling you, you know, what Captain Dick Down said to his girl.  You asked, for future reference, and all.”

“Oh.  Right.”  He frowns, turning away again.  “Move when I do.”  He orders stiffly, preparing to move.

Well, shit!

“Bucky, wait.”  Your voice is softer this time, tears prickling your eyes.  There’s a chance that neither of you will make it through this and it’s suddenly hit you that there’s something missing.

“What now?”  He grumbles, turning to find you closer than he expected.

You surge forward, cupping his jaw in your hands as you capture his lips in a kiss that’s both urgent and needy.  You don’t care if he doesn’t respond, you need to feel this before it’s too late. All this tension between you, the jibes and snarky banter, it’s unresolved and sexual in nature.  You want him, and if this is all you can have then so be it.  One stolen moment before it all slips through your fingers, and you both go to your graves.

You’re already pulling back when he snaps back to attention, quickly pulling you back for another kiss. His tongue delicately touches between the seal of your lips and you sigh with longing.

“You ready?”  You pull away but he’s still clearing his head, trying to focus again.

On your feet you’re running out, pumping your legs as fast as you can, heading to the wrong place. Machine guns stutter to life and Bucky is on your heels a second later, fear contorting his features as he scoops you up in his metal arm and returns fire almost blindly.  He’s shielding your body with his own and yips like a wounded pup when the bullets find him.

On your knees beneath the curved shield of his back you see the enemy are far closer than you thought. Everything in you yelled stop and you felt the pressure rise through your body and out, cascading off you like a roiling storm.

The bullets stop but the guns are still firing, muffled by the thickness of the air.  Despite the pain in his lower back and hip, he turns to see what’s happening.  Bullets sluggishly pushing through the air like flies in syrup, all but stopped and slightly redirected on a path that will take them away from a central focal point that is you.  You’re doing this, shielding you both as if by some miracle, your power not only refracting the light causing rainbows but acting like a forcefield.

“As much as I have to break up this little party, I really can’t have you killing my friends.”  The voice of Tony Stark is heard a second before the Iron Man himself and several of his Iron Legion appear and shoot each and every remaining guard with a taser disc, stunning them into unconsciousness.

Crossbones is a different matter and is somehow resistant to the zapping he just got.  He levels a grenade launcher at the stacks near where you and Bucky are crouched and fires.  No air shield will save you from all of that falling metal, but Bucky is still fast despite his wounds.  There’s blood running down his leg in rivulets as he pulls you to safety, and shields you instinctively with his body once more while the sound of explosions and grinding metal fill the air.

“I did not know I could do that.”  You praise yourself.

“I still got shot.”

“It’s just a flesh wound.” You snort.  “Walk it off.”

“You’re a real ray of sunshine, you know that?”

“I must be something special if you took one in the ass for me.”  You wink.  “I hope it heals puckered, then you’ll have two rusty bullet holes.”

“STARK!”  He shouts but pulls you closer to him.  “Evac for one.  She’s walking hom-owwww!”  You pinch the skin on the inside of his thigh viciously enough that he shoves you out of his embrace.

You both stay close on the Quinjet home.  Bucky had been confused as to how Stark had known to mount a rescue mission but when you produced Captain Dick Down’s phone from your uni-boob bra it all became apparent. All of the comms in the facility had been locked down but that was a personal device, one that probably wasn’t allowed to be carried.  Good old Captain Dick Down.

The facility had been put to a far worse use than drugs and weapons trafficking.  iGoddess was a front for human trafficking and also human experimentation.  The restraint chair they had strapped Bucky into had been used to restrain test subjects; Alexander Pearce was trying to replicate the super serum that made Steve and Bucky what they were.

“So, this was a win for us.” Steve said in the debrief.  “Our intel was lacking but it worked out in the end.”

“Says you who didn’t get shot in the ass cheek.”  Bucky grumbled, shifting cautiously on the Mr Glitters cushion you���d given him as a joke.

“I got to see some wonderful scenery,” you grin brilliantly, “so I’m not complaining.”

There had been no further discussion about the kiss you and Bucky had shared when you thought you might die in that place, but that’s ok.  Your daily thrills are made up of making him squirm, and since you two had become closer since your ordeal, you have had several of moments like those.  There’s plenty of time and you’re prepared to play the long game, starting with your newest idea.  You pull out your phone and casually write a text while Steve is rambling on about seized research and assets.

[I’m so turned on right now].

Bonus add-on for this work:  Captain Dick Down - External link to AO3

Because apparently 7k words wasn’t enough and I just had to try my hand at a little text chat/social media piece.  It’s more of an embellishment.  Enjoy

And if you liked this story, why not try Good Ole Stuffing, a smutty follow on for the same reader/character.

[nightmarenoise]

Just comparing two cartoons I love

I understand that nobody asked in any capacity, but here I go anyway:

It feels fair to compare Ducktales 2017 to Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2018), not only because they're only about a year apart and truly, what is a year, but also because they

1. Both use this style that looks like it jumped straight out of a comic book. Okay, it's mostly the solidly inked shadows, but it gives me, personally, comic-y vibes.

2. They have taken what's arguably the main characters (the triplets for DT, the Turtles for TMNT) and shaken the formula up a good bit. Were the triplets formerly indistinguishable and all had the exact same personality, interests and voice actor, they are now three entirely separate entities with different traits and appearances. And while the turtles had about one defining personality trait and looked basically the same, save for the color of their masks, Rise made them different species of turtle to justify giving them radically different designs and three-dimensional personalities. Both shows faced criticism for this decision from people who cannot deal with change. Despite this, in both cases, it just works and does so incredibly well.

3. The oldest bros wear red.

4. We have two middle bros associated with the color blue who are both voiced by Ben Schwartz.

5. Both shows have a focus on family, with Ducktales especially focusing on found family and Rise on brotherhood.

6. Anime references!

Ducktales has a larger cast overall, with a lot of different characters all interacting with each other and they all have the most pleasant voices I've ever heard in my entire life. It's all solidly animated, the style is consistent and the animation is fluid, the characters are diverse and they're all lovely in their own right, except for those who aren't. The writing is top notch. Everyone feels consistent despite the large cast and it's delightful to watch all those interesting people interact with each other in their own way. The show also handles its mystery elements and occasional action scenes incredibly well, building suspense and delivering laughs and gut punches without hesitation. They juggle different tones like a professional clown, except the true clown was us, the audience, all along, for ever having doubted them.

The overarching plot of Ducktales, for its first two seasons, was mostly to uncover the mystery of what had happened to the mother of the triplets and all that would entail. Mystery and mythical elements will likely continue to be afoot for season 3.

Rise works with less focal characters, we have the Turtles, Splinter and April as well as various bad guys, but more than makes up for it with a lot of animation. A lot a lot of animation and it's all high quality. There's usually so much going on on-screen that a watching it once isn't enough to catch it all. Despite that, it doesn't feel crowded or rushed. Lots of dynamic shots and incredibly-choreographed action scenes, but nothing the thoroughly solid writing has to hide behind. Even when the baddies aren't the main concern, they're still well-rounded, interesting characters with unique abilities and motivations. Although, most of the mutants are just really feral. Still a delightfully diverse cast.

The turtles on the other hand spent their first season trying to foil their various foes, from a yokai trying to mutate all of humanity, to his mutants, to dealing with random mythical stuff, to the nefarious Foot Clan trying to reassemble the Dark Armor in the shadows. It's generally a more action-driven show, but they still find the time for some heartfelt moments.

The triplets 2.0

Despite their conventiently color-coded caps, they were really mostly the same character possessing three different bodies at a time. Well, the times of eerie The Shining like-twins, except extended to triplets, are over!

We have Huey, the oldest brother, voiced by Danny Pudi. He's a gentle, intellectual soul who values red hats, science, scout badges and checklists. Huey is arguably the closest in characterization to the original triplets, with some additional neat freak sprinkled in for flavor. He tries to be the responsible older sibling and keep his brothers under control and out of trouble. He also seems to have the most fiery temper of the bunch and should clearly not be pressed to the breaking point. He's my personal favorite and I heard season 3 will bring more focus to him, which makes me elated to hear. 888/10.

Middle child Dewey, the blue one, voiced by Ben Schwartz, who will inevitably come for all the iconic blue characters. He's very clearly the middle one, because he craves attention and validation and occasionally dreams of being an only child. Dewey is the one who started the investigation into their mom's disappearance and kept it from his brothers, partially to save them from hurt, but also because he wanted to feel special. He's the most interested in going on adventures with their uncle, but can get reckless when doing so. He's a bit of a spotlight hog, who has his own talk show that nobody watches and sings his own theme song when he needs to get hyped up, or just to fill this silence. This may sound kind of negative, but rest assured, he's a good, sweet boy. The focal triplet for the first season. 500/10.

Louie, the evil triplet, a schemer and a conman. Voiced by Bobby Moynihan.  The youngest of the bunch. While they call him evil, he's really far too lazy to cause serious harm, except for when it's his laziness that's causing him to take dangerous shortcuts, oops. He dreams of making a fortune, but without having to work for it and preferably without any responsibility either, thank you. He also occasionally dreams of being a spoiled fat cat. Despite his chill demeanor, he can be a bit of a crybaby and those tears are only fake 50% of the time. I feel like he likes getting babied, but mainly because that means there's less work for him to do. Season 2, which focuses more on him, reveals that he's actually quite brilliant, capable of seeing all the angles and giving him some chessmaster-like qualities. He needs to learn to use those abilities for good. 665/10.

Hi, she's Webbie! The honorary triplet, who also got a massive makeover, from annoying token girl tagalong to socially awkward, adorkable action girl. Be careful who you call ugly in middle school, indeed. Like a more ferocious  Mabel Pines, she has a grappling hook and years of martial arts training under her belt. Webbie can absolutely decimate you, but won't, because she's a sweet girl. Voiced by Kate Micucci. She continues to like unicorns and the color pink, but assuredly in the most badass of ways. She helped Dewey with his quest to uncover the mystery of his missing mom, but works well with all of the triplets, with Huey taking her under his wing a bit and Louie trying to get her to chill out more. Webbie is a sweetheart and I would die for her, were it not completely unnecessary, since she's more than capable of taking care of herself. ∞/10.

A lot of the supporting cast also saw updates and changes, for instance Gyro being a genius without social skills and Fenton being an adorkable scientist, but again, they work really well. They're interesting new takes on beloved characters. Even the new additions to the cast are great. In short, I love me some birds and am excited for season 3, Disney, get your scheduling together.

The Turtles 2.14.2 - I upgraded my upgrade in the middle of the upgrade

Also, these guys have seen so many different iterations in their, what, 30+ years of existence. As someone with no prior attachment to the turtle brand, I don't have a lot to say here. Leo's not the leader in this one and Raph has more personality than being angry at Leo for being the leader. Donnie is not just a random nerd spouting technobabble and Mikey has more depth than yelling the catchphrase every now and again. Apparently, this made people upset. I don't know how to help you with that.  The middle brothers exude some high chaotic energy and should not be left unsupervised, but the oldest and youngest seem fairly stable.

Raphael, the red-bandana'd alligator snapping turtle is an imposing figure. He's the oldest and therefore team leader by default. Raph has no reason to be upset at Leo, so he isn't. Despite his ferocious appearance, he's a soft guy, who likes teddies and doting on his brothers, but fears puppets. He's a bit of a knucklehead, most of his plans involve smashing things with his tonfa and he may refer to himself in the third person in the heat of the moment, but he possesses emotional intelligence, is open about his feelings and looks after his brothers. He is big and and strong, but his heart is bigger and stronger. He especially loves small animals animals, who don't usually return his feelings. RIP in F. This responsible guy is voiced by Omar Benson Miller. 300/10, very soft. Somehow both the heart and the big guy of the group.

Donatello has been upgraded from second-to-youngest to second-to-oldest, not that it makes much of a difference. His color of choice is purple and he continues in the character's tradition of being a nerd, although this time, with self-confidence. Donnie is very sure of himself and his abilities. As a spiny soft-shell turtle, he's less sure of his shell, but that's okay, he's made robotic battle shells to make up for it and his bō is the mother of all multitools. This guy can build you a tank out of a buggie and upgrade your animatronic into something to give the FNAF franchise a run for its money. He's the smartest of the four and when not focused on his phone, very focused on the mission. Due to having to deal with his bros, he can be exasperated a lot. Thinks of himself as an emotionally unavailable bad boy, even though he's just really sensitive and wants his dad or someone parent-aged to tell him they're proud of him. Theater kid. 999/10, give the middle child a hug and some coffee, you can't tell me he has a healthy sleep cycle. This sarcastic nerd is brought to you by Josh Brener.

Leonardo, Ben Schwartz's second blue character (Sonic (2020) being the third under his belt) and also his second ninja after Randy Cunningham. He's not the leader. He's still a good character. Leo has approximately 800 charisma and unwavering faith in both, his family and himself. Mostly himself though. Like Louie, season 2 revealed that he is a master of prediction and playing people like the cheap kazoo you can't tell me he doesn't have to play Darude's Sandstorm on. He dabs, he boards, he will pun you to death and back and he has an Odachi that can cut through space. Leo likes hogging the spotlight when given the chance and wants to be showered with attention and praise. Having four kids really only means twice the middle child nonsense. Leo is a red-eared slider, the original species of the TMNT, as I've been told. He's also the best at being a ninja, but usually too lazy to really apply himself. He's younger than Donnie, but tumblr suggested to read the two as twins, since they're approximately the same age, which sheds a whole new light on their dynamic and frankly, makes way too much sense. 420/10, for our memelord Leonardo.

Michelangelo, the eternally youngest of the bunch. An artiste, who puts stickers on himself, tags the lair, has a spiritual connection to his skateboard and the color orange. Mikey loves all things arts and craft, but he also tries his hands at cooking. He idolizes famous TV chefs and can do pretty much anything out of and into pizza. He's funny, without being annoying, like I feel a lot of other iterations of this character are. It's an easy pitfall for comic relief guys, but this one is more than that. If that's an issue, feel free to leave my house. Mikey is genuinely sweet and happy, optimistic and soft, but also the one brother who knows when it's time to take off the gloves and just get straight to the point. He's open about and in touch with his feelings. He's just baby. Don't treat him as one though. A lot of promo stuff says Leo has taken him under his wing, but he's had more episodes together with Donnie. Not that I'm complaining, they work very well together. Mikey and Raph are both the emotional centers of the group. Does not mind being yeeted after retracting into his shell, as box turtles may do. (Disclaimer, do not yeet actual box turtles!) His weapon of choice is a Kusari-Fundo that can turn into a fire-demon and is about as unpredictable as he is. Likes to jump and bounce around. Probably does parkour. Voiced by Brandon Mychal Smith who is audibly having a blast. 500/10, just an all around Kusari-fun guy.

For last, but certainly not least, April O'Neil, my girl, who saw an upgrade from flip-flopping love interest who was vaguely ninja-ing, but mostly damsel in distress-ing, to all-around spunky powerhouse and by God, she is glowing. Rise has her more as a big sister figure to the turtles, and I will not be told otherwise. She is independent and don't need no man, mutant or no. She has her teleporting pet, her faith in herself, her pinpoint baseball hitting skills and the a complete and utter lack of fear. Despite being a weirdness magnet, April is perfectly comfortable. She would like to be able to keep a job, maybe, but she has loving friends who respect and love her. Surprisingly good a ninja, fearless and fun. Occasionally thinks about being popular at school, but it's really not a big concern, she's not gonna throw a tantrum over it or anything. April is very chill. Not likely to be damseled. More likely to run after the turtles and clean up their messes or save them and everyone involved is fine with that.

The late 10's are really coming in to show us how dynamic and well-written female characters that aren't just "strong", but three-dimensional and relatable are done, huh?

An iconic performance by Kat Graham and ∞/10 for being the honorary better ninja non-mutant non-turtle and best big sister.

Here we have it, two older properties, having new life breathed into them to make them fresh and enjoyable. Have a new spin put on them, to better fit in with our current world. You can feel the love oozing out of every frame. At the end of the day, of course, it all boils down to taste and whether or not you like something. I gave Ducktales 2017 a go because a lot of the staff from Gravity Falls went to work on it and if you don't know me, I love me some Gravity Falls. It's a good show and I enjoy it. I recently got into Rise and while I don't know much about the people working on it, it is also a greatly enjoyable show, easily on the same level as Ducktales, if not above, yet with far less people speaking about it. Which is frankly saddening. I can only recommend the two of them wholeheartedly. If you love animation, yourself and occasionally feeling things, these are for you!

[burritodetodo]

Burrito’s Guide To Survive Coronavirus Quarantine

We got to keep social distance (1 or 2 meters each other) or stay home during coronavirus outbreak so I thought I can share with y’all some things I’m gonna watch or do doing quarantine (this is a very long post, REBLOGS ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED!).

BUT FIRST SOME RULES:

Wash your hands: do it for 20 seconds or a while, but ALWAYS do it. It prevents the virus from spreading. If you don’t have sanitizer, water and soap! The cheapest and best ally against the disease.

Buy everything you need: if you can, try to buy stuff so you can stay some days at home. If the place is crowded, go back home and come later when it’s more empty. Same as medicine.

You can go for a walk: stay at home all day can be overwhelming for your mental health, but unless the goverment puts a curfew or gets strict about it you can go walk outside for a while always respecting the 1 or 2 meters from other people and without making contact (chatting) with other people. This ain’t my rule, a CDC professional says. DON’T go visit your friends or to crowded places such as bars, restaurants, shoppings, etc. If you want to buy something, ask for delivery or take away.

If you have coronavirus sympthoms (high fever, diarrhea, cough, feeling tired, breath difficulties) DON’T GO TO THE HOSPITAL YET, CALL TO YOUR PUBLIC HEALTH ORGANISATION OR WHATEVER YOU GOT AND THEY’LL TREAT YOU.

(credits to whoever made this meme)

SO YOUR LIFE IS ON QUARANTINE

Let’s say your boss or your school told you can stay at home. Okay then, you gotta prepare for some days inside *Isolation by John Lennon plays in the distance*. The first thing you think is you have to prepare a batch of series and movies to watch in order to kill some time. I’m gonna recommend you some you can find on VOD or cable, if you don’t have it don’t worry because I got you covered!

Infinity Train: a yet two seasons saga about people who got to face their problems aboard an endless train. The protagonists are joined by creatures who have different nature and help them, or not, to acknowledge their issues and leave the train. It’s on CN, it will continue on HBO Max.

The Owl House: a teen girl who daydream a lot was going to be sent to a down-to-earth camp but then she crosses a portal to the Boiling Isles, a magical world where she is taken care by a powerful Owl witch/saleswoman and her adorable demon. Lots of fantasy, some action scenes and many many puns. It’s on Disney Channel, it’ll be on Disney+ in some weeks.

Primal: Genndy Tartakovsky delighted us with the alliance of a caveman and a dinosaur, two rivals in a wild world who ally after facing a devastating event. It IS brutal and beatiful, has no dialogue and keeps you watching closely. Five final episodes are set to premiere this year. It’s on Adult Swim, maybe on HBO Max.

Tuca and Bertie: for the critics, one of 2019 best shows. For Netflix, a show that had to be cut off because the studio unionized. Two friends in their late 20s face changes in their lives: from living with a boyfriend and plan a life to look a way to stay sober and get a job. Deals with trauma, ptsd, anxiety and more harsh moments very well. In fact, the creator is a vital part of Bojack Horseman! It’s on Netflix.

Aggretsuko: red pandas are cute eh? But what about a antopomorphic red panda who releases her anger and frustrations by singing at a karaoke? This awesome comedy by Sanrio & Netflix is one of anime’s big hits lately. Like T&B, has a good handle of adult problems but not going too deep just to not break the comedy. You can watch it on Netflix.

Regular Show: yeah-uuuuhhhh! Eight seasons, a movie, five Halloween specials and some others. The adventures of a racoon and a blue jay with their co-workers/friends that relies on psychadellia and 80s and 90s nostalgia. It begins good, gets better, then lowers the quality (they were producing the movie at the same time tho, give some credit) and with and after the movie ends awesome. It’s on CN web, dunno if on Hulu (US only) and proably on HBO Max.

Evangelion: it’s a classic at this point, but addictive to me because I end rewatching the series or the final movie many times. A post apocalyptic future where the world has to deal with strange creatures known as the Angels and a boy with lots of traumas has to get on a mecha to save the humankind. All the characters have traumas and issues, the interaction between them or the action makes it worth. The End of Evangelion is a movie that ends the unfinished series. Warning: at some point it becomes very twisted and there are scenes which are too much violent. Viewer disclosure etc. It’s on Netflix worldwide.

Steven Universe & SU Future: this is the tale of the gem boy who ends a galactical tyranny and brings democracy to the universe. A acclaimed show that broke through many topics like gender, identity, ptsd, relationships and many more. Besides it’s got the best scores of the Milky Way and beyond thanks to the talent of Rebecca Sugar, Aivi Tran and Surasshu. And the actors and acrtresses! I don’t forget the movie, a musical that is an introduction to the epilogue: Shippuden Future. The show is available on CN and will be on HBO Max. Worldwide? No news.

Adventure Time: something that began as an innocent boy and a magical dog having adventures in a post apocalyptic world turns into the journey of Finn Metens from childhood to almost adulthood. There is a lot of fantasy and comedy you enjoy, but there are dark moments and serious ones through S6 that find a balance with early seasons form S7 to the finale. It also has great music, memorable moments and colaborations. And guess what? There is going to be a special set to premiere on HBO Max in some weeks! You got plenty of time to catch up or rewatch before that on CN or only (!!) S5 on Netflix.

Final Space: a dude tries to save the universe with their friends, where we can find his love interest, a cat-man and his kitten son, a intersexual alien, an AI then robot that is the best of them, two particular siblings and an annoying bot that prevents insanity that makes you insane. Crazy adventures in space, lots of situations, sadness, an evil smol bean who is a space emperor, a dude who looks for revenge, space deities that can destroy the universe. Is this a lot or info? It is not, because there is more and you can watch it on TBS, Adult Swim and Netflix (the world except US).

Rick and Morty: the most powerful, smartest human in the universe has adventures with his grandson. It’s awesome, but has a very toxic fanbase. Anyway, you can enjoy it on Adult Swim or Netflix (which is up to date!) and the rest of S4 is set someday.

Bojack Horseman: a Hollywood satire about human relationships, fame, traumas with a pour of comedy. Alongside the previous series, the best adult animation of the decade. Sadly cut by Netflix because the studio unionized (see T&B), said by both the creator and Aaron Paul. You can watch the six amazing seasons on that platform.

I’m not an animated movies guy, but here are three I really like and you can watch:

Porco Rosso: a handsome Italian combat aviator turned magically to a pig has a face off with an American pilot hired by pirates to get rid of him before WWII in Fascist Italy. It’s entertaining and, like every Ghibli movie, nice to watch. It’s on Netflix and will be on HBO Max for US.

Lego Batman Movie: Batman is depressed and has to get over it. It’s wacky and has lots of comedy. Plus Will Arnett is top 3 Batman. On Netflix (Latinamerica).

Spiderverse: Oscar winner movie about your friendly neighbour Peter Parker Miles Morales. Miles sees Spiderman die and feels bad after being transfered to a private school. Then a radioactive spider from a Fisk compound bites Miles and he’s Spiderman... among other dimensions’ Spiderpeople: Gwen, Peni, Peter Parker, Noir and Peter Porker. It’s visually amazing. On US it’s on Netflix (I guess), on Latinamerica on HBO.

Some interesting live actions I watched lately

Atlanta: Donald Glover is Earn, a dude who struggles to find a job for her baby girld and sees an opportunity when his cousin, Paper Boi, has a hit and uses him to make his cos famous. Sometimes a comedy, sometimes a social satire with touches of drama. And all protagonists are now big shots, like Zazie Beetz, Brian Tyree Henry or Lakeith Stanfield. There are two seasons and two seasons set for 2021 (2022 possible beacuse of coronavirus). It’s on FX, Hulu (US) and Netflix (world)

Avenue 5: this is brand new. On 2060 space cruises are a thing, and one cruise (the Avenue 5) has an accident that leaves the crew and passangers stranded for years. The captain (Hugh Laurie) has to solve this shit with a bunch of incompetent crew, bosses like Judd (Josh Gad), except one female engeneer who is very smart. Lots of crazy things happen in this series from the creator behind Veep. It’s on HBO (it’s free in the US!).

Peaky Blinders: it has some years but damn it’s epic. A gang from Birmingham makes their way to the top during the late 1910s after the Great War and extends through the 1920s. S5 is right in the ascension of fascism in Britain. ALL THE CAST acts spectacular, names like Cillian Murphy, Tom Hardy, Anna Taylor-Joy and a long etc. But my fave is Paul Anderson, that ultra violent junkie Arthur Shelby is splendid, then is Tommy and aunt Pol, the baddest badass woman in Britain. Blinders is going to have seven seasons, there are two left. You can watch it on BBC or Netflix.

Sex Education: speaking of Britain, excellent teen comedy. Horny, doubtful teenagers going through those hard years. Stories of sex (duh!), abuse situations, abortion, there are gay relationships either, Gillian Anderson! It’s on Netflix, go go go!

Watchmen: despite not having Alan Moore on board, Damien Lindeloff did a tremendous job with the comic. Way better and less misleading than Zack Snyder’s 2009 film, Watchmen is again at the gates of the world’s end (like today) and handles the problem of racism and white supremacy quite well. Just 9 episodes, but worth to watch. On HBO.

CAOS: Sabrina the Teenage Witch is over. Warner and Netflix made a revival of the Archie Comics character and brought her to XXI Century. But gorier, hornier, dark and magical than the nice 90s sitcom. Sabrina Spellman goes from a doubtful teen who has to decide if she has to be a witch or a powerless woman to rule Hell. How she does it? Find out on Netflix! Note: S1 and 2 take some episodes to start properly. Don’t get bored too easy.

There are A LOT MORE to recommend and I make a list: Harley Quinn (DC Universe), OK KO (Hulu -US only-), House MD, Young Justice (DC Universe/Netflix), Ken Burns’ documentaries (Netflix), Titans (DCU), Over The Garden Wall (CN), Seis Manos (Netflix), Thundercats Roar (CN), Easy (Netflix), GLOW (Netflix), Star Trek Discovery (CBS, Netflix) and Picard (CBS, Amazon Prime), etc.

- You named cool shows, but I’m not from the United States or I don’t have a subscription to (insert VOD here) because I can’t afford it

- Glad you asked, I have the answer here

Introducing Stremio. It’s an open source platform where you can watch shows, movies or even live TV on Windows, Linux, Apple or Android. You create an account, install some addons and start looking for what you want to watch.

Stremio is based on torrents, you should install addons from many known torrent sites. So maybe you find an old show, but there aren’t many seeds to watch. And it could be frustraiting, so make sure there are people sharing so you can watch it.

You can download Stremio here and check the FAQs which is very clear.

NOTE: Stremio is note quite “clean” way to watch, but if you do please support the shows you watch by posting, commenting about them, making memes, thanking the creators and crew for their work, buying merchandise if you can. They put a lot to make the shows we love, let’s give ‘em back that love and effort.

You’re tired of the same music, the same movies or need to leave something to make company? There is Vaughn Live, a streaming page where are lots of channels with movies and series on strem (not VOD). For example, there is a channel that streams Adventure Time, other Regular Show, other Sci-Fi shows, another with DBZ and so on. Take in count that if the channel has +70 viewers, the free access is cut and if you want to watch it you have to pay.

En Vaughn también hay canales en español, como Simpsonmanía, Dragon Ball, Futurama, dibujos viejos y muchísimo más. Anyway, go to https://vaughn.live/ and enjoy yourselves!

Y hablando de canales en español, pueden ir a SeriesLan donde está el mayor reservorio conocido de series animadas de entre 1960 a 2010 en español latino. Pueden encontrar tesoros desde Don Gato, los Halcones Galácticos o Street Sharks a Flapjack y Mechas XLR. Otra alternativa para que pasen el rato.

Some interesting facts:

Epic Games releases a free game per week in their store. This week will be two games. You can check in https://www.epicgames.com

Steam has good prices on games and some free ones. There even is the latest Football Manager for free until March 25th. Check on https://store.steampowered.com/

If you’re interested,

I got this playlist I made on Spotify

with songs I liked in more than one year. More than 1200 songs.

And that’s pretty much it! You got resources for a lot of days, 14 initially since that’s the quarantine time in my country. Remember: obey the indications of the Health authorities, this is no time to play the “fuck the goverment” game. We will overcome this pandemy together, helping and caring for each other. That’s why I did this guide, to keep your minds busy in these tough times! Wash your hands, keep social distance, stay at home, go outside if necessary and have some patience please. This has been a PSA.

Stay strong!

Burrito