#big axolotl man

[xccx-cringecorner]

OLD ART

I should rewatch a gameplay of that game sometime

I really really liked the atmosphere of it and the whole premise.

Fandom: Fran Bow Character(s): Palontras

[omuricebreakfast]

Drew @jukoduko's silly mans in whiteboard w/ em HEHEHEHE I had so much fun!!! GO CHECK EM OUT!!!

We wanted to see how we would draw each others sillies so this is how I would draw Jukenito!!

[finnautica]

Some charms I've recently restocked.

[bunny-bun-draws]

✨ July's shop update ✨

Half-way through the month with new stickers, and now formally putting up the keychains and sticker albums that arrived since last month x'd an apology for not doing it sooner, it's been a busy month u,wu

As you already know, if something interests you, go to my Big Cartel shop here! Thanks as always for your support 🐰✨

[bed-buggier]

I've had this video in the back of my head all day and omfg my brain chemsitry has been altered I love this voice for the Axolotl and I love him and I want to cuddle up with him and let my sorrows melt away andahouqgyiqcgslpiqbpixbpjxfhkzyeJfkg♡

[lyxthen]

Call me a pessimist, but I don't think we will ever be able to return axolotls to their natural range. As far as I am aware, there are no axolotls left in the wild.

They are native to this one place, the lakes of Texcoco, and Xochimilco, here in Mexico. Now, most of these lakes were drained when the Spanish colonized Tenochtitlan and founded Mexico City, which is why the city floods so horribly. There should be lakes there. What *is* left of the lakes is very contaminated because of city activity.

While there have been many conservation efforts, as long as Mexico City is there I doubt the wild axolotl population will ever recover, or be able to exist independently from human intervention. There is a common misconception about pet axolotls being taken away from the wild, which is completely baseless. While a lot of exotic pets (mammals and birds) are in fact taken from the wild, reptiles and amphibians are more likely not. Axolotls have a long history of being bred in captivity, and lab and pet axolotls are the only reason the species still exist.

Owning an axolotls is akin to owning other fresh water fish, in the sense that it *is* very tricky, but by no means impossible for your average person (assuming they have money for pets at all, that is). I wouldn't recommend getting an exotic species without doing the proper research, and this is not me saying you should get one. But it makes me sad when people say owning axolotls as pets is somehow immoral or animal abuse. It can be, if you are a shitty owner, but that is true for any animal.

These are not monkeys. These are not parrots, or wild cats or canids, or non-ferret mustelids. They are not being taken from the wild to be sold as pets, for fucks sake, they are pink and neon green.

And there is plenty of research on how to properly care for these animals! Because we have been doing so for decades! It is alright to have one. I promise.

[aniisol]

okay i know this was a while ago but WHAT is going on now it's even worse. (Etho's allied with everyone, but the Tuff Guys aren't really allied to each other? Grian's allies died and he allied with Martyn? but Martyn killed Skizz? and Jimmy was allied with Ren but also very much not so? and Joel is allied with Lizzie in BAM but BAM isn't allied with them? where does Big B stand with the 4gs and Renwood?)

The more we get into the life series the more everyone adapts to an "every man for himself" mentality. They've seen each other lie and betray so often they learn to expect it and distance themselves from everyone. They saw Dogwarts and the AHA crew. They know large alliances don't last. They know that keeping their ties light allows them to move freely, and moving freely has proved the only way to win.

Every winner after the first game (Scott, Pearl, Martyn, and Scar) all won with no alliances.

Scott's final words were, "It's just me and Binkie (his axolotl), we finally did it."

Pearl cut off everyone she had in double life, even her own soulmate.

Martyn killed Scott, his one ally, with no hesitation in order to win.

Scar went through the whole season without a team.

Alliances lead to betrayal, betrayal leads to mistrust, mistrust leads to loneliness, loneliness leads to alliances, but they remember the betrayal and betrayal leads to mistrust etc.

They're all willing to turn on each other at a moment's notice. The wild cards only fuel the chaos of the season that would've already been a free-for-all.

[a-fangirltrash]

"Ford treated Fiddleford so bad!!" As if him treating Fidds like shit wasn't directly a product of being constantly gaslighted and abused by Bill.

I'm genuinely getting tired of people flaming Ford, but in a serious tone. Like people are acting like he's a toxic selfish man that used to put Fidd down... and... no he never did???

Ford ADMIRED Fiddleford, he TRUSTED his friend for what he described as "the project of his life" and Ford, being the most prideful man in the world, decided to ask for help because he knew how CAPABLE Fiddleford was.

When Fiddleford arrived Ford let him know how thankful he was that he was there with him, the man even took a bath and made sure to make him feel like he was at home. Ford even remembered his favorite bean brand?

When Fidd got traumatized by the gremoblin, Ford TRIED to help with what he knew. He tried to help him meditate, took days off for him, decided that they could go out and have some good time. Be mindful that this might've been the total OPPOSITE of what Bill wanted, and he still did for his friend sanity. Bill would make Ford work like CRAZY.

Also, for him it wasn't "putting him in danger!!" For him it was sharing adventures with his friend! Just like hi did with *cofcofSTANLEYcofcof*. That's love language all around.

Fiddleford could abandon the project anytime, but he didn't because he liked being there. And Ford is NOT the guilty one for Fidds creatinf the gun :/ it's nor his fault that fidd interpreted "using his creativity" in that way. Ford NEVER approved that gun.

Also, Ford noticed that RUBIK THING, HE APPREACITE HIM SO MUCH HE KNEW HIS HABITS. AND GOT CONCERNED RIGHT AHEAD.

"B-but he free Frilliam!" The portal was close, did you all READ how much gaslighted Ford was at that point? He didn't free it because "ugh i don't care about this shitty axolotl" but because Bill started to freak out and yell at him to get rid of it. Ford wrote "A friend" with a heart in the title??? Wdym he didn't appreciate it aaaagh

If Stanley took the diaries (i don't like this universe because...stanley:() he WOULD have looked for Fiddleford, they'd have made the Institute of Oddology, he'd have shared his success... with the man that helped him the most.

TBOB SPOILERS AHEAD

He got sad when Fiddleford told him he was gonna get back home to spent time with his family, he PLANNED holidays with him. Even if he DIDN'T like holidays.

He took a day off just to make him happy after his atrocious christmas party, he USED RESOURCES that as you know ford is the most practical mam in the world JUST to decorate the portal as a tree and make Fiddleford happy.

And that atuff of "h-he doesn't appreaciated Fiddleford gifts!" IS SO DUMB OMG, he wore the gloves in the snow and was incredibly thankful about them. When BILL that dumbass triangle pretty much LACERATED his hands, he used Fiddleford gloves as a way to hide those scars, and in a sense, probably to comfort himself because he was ALONE.

I think that was the reason of Fiddleford fast forgiveness, not only because he's a sweet heart, but because after fighting with Bill i think he noticed how BIG was the monster torturing his "partner".

And after all of this i'm not trying to excuse Ford treating him poorly and not listening to him in time

BUT FORD IS NOT A PERFECT VICTIM

Even if i believe he wasn't "the" (at least only) reason of Fiddleford becoming crazy, i know it could have been better for him and he could have avoided so much trauma. But can we please stop seeing Ford as a selfish, evil mad scientist and start seing him as a victim... of a terribly abusive relationship that checks in for all types of domestic abuse... please!!! Ford is not a perfect VICTIM Can we blame Bill!!!

All this rant is because there's certain ship... which i kinda like, but i just HATE HATE HATE the interpretation and how much they put Ford as a villian on it omg

Edit: fixed the use of word narcissism, since it might've been ableist! Replaced with words that actually relate to what i intended to say, instead of referencing a personality disorder

[bogleech]

Actually my CURRENT completely serious personal list of animals I'd add to our current world and specifically local to where I live is as follows. I have shared some of these before but my list is always evolving:

1) A big tarantula sized lousefly because I think they look awesome, would be like vampire bats in that they can bite anything but don't naturally mess with humans. Everyone would find these scary, I would keep one as a pet.

2) a freshwater amphibious barnacle. Larva would have to crawl out of the water and start growing in dirt or mud with long roots. Would smell bad to attract and catch flies when it's exposed to air. In water could catch things like ostracods. I would raise these in pots of dirty scummy water on my balcony. Pokemon would make a poison type Barbacle form out of them.

3) a big huge 12-15 foot long predatory amphibian that looks like specifically this toy of Crassigyrinus. Basically just like a crocodile in size, niche and danger level but slimy and would like cold northern rivers so I can go see them and feed them raw chicken off our fishing docks.

4) a creature exactly like this idiot looking prehistoric lamprey reconstruction, but with a horrible mouth that can bite you like the cookie cutter shark/cookie cutter animals I was hypothesizing. These would live wherever #3 lives so they could have a good food source (#3 should regenerate really well like an axolotl) and so I could catch them and keep them in aquariums

5) a predatory spiny katydid like this guy but as huge as a New Zealand Weta and maybe camouflaged like a clump of lichens

6) a species of glow worm gnats that are maybe just modestly twice as big and just about everywhere in the world in trees and stuff

7) a giant python size freshwater ribbon worm, just like the marine ones with paralyzing venom that swallow whole big fish. Just want one that lives closer. It should be able to come on land, too. I just want the mongolian death worm to be real.

8) a single freshwater cephalopod and I nominate a flapjack octopus big enough to eat a man. I just want the cuero to be real.

9) basket star that hangs from trees and catches birds and stuff. I know echinoderms use seawater as blood but maybe it could fill itself with salty mucus? Maybe it should also protect itself by stinging all over. I'm tired of getting stung by boring nettles in the woods, I wanna get stung instead by spiny tree tentacles.

10) a single surviving pterosaur that evolved to be vampiric and should look as close as possible to the stirge from Dungeons and Dragons

just to clarify that's this one, the one that looks like a miserable piece of shit

[thicctails]

I C R A V E more gbc au stuff: particularly with Bill: were the twins aware of Bill before gravity falls? what do they tell the twins about bill once they get there? how does bill and his parents even go about reconnecting?? I want to know more about the direct aftermath of the reunion. It's not hard to piece together Bill and Fords relationship from the journals: did they read into it the wrong direction or smth? Like Bill fucking traumatized Ford: Euclid and Scalene's estranged long lost son fucking severly traumatized and manipulated a realtive of their adoptive kids: there's gotta be more complex feelings there? Does Bill blame them for his medical trauma? do Scalene and Euclid regret that? did they have differing opinions on it back when? also like, now Bill is legit insane: what with him having been percieved insane or a ticking time bomb of insanity before how do they feel about that? do they have differeing opinions?????

FNSKJDFNSDKJ DSI C R A V E MORE FERERJSNJKFDNFKE

PLEASE FEED MEEEEE

Ask and ye shall r e c e i v e

Both Scalene and Euclid were under the impression that Bill died when Euclidea inevitably collapsed in on itself. They told Dipper and Mabel that they had a child, but never went into much detail, as it hurt too much to talk about.

(You can imagine how fucking gutted they were when they saw images of him all around the Shack. Journal 3 was just a big fat gob of salt in their open wounds)

Reconnecting for them is like a healing an infected wound: you have to cut out the rot, grit your teeth for the burn of cleaning it out, work to keep the infection away, and accept the fact that there will be a scar.

Bill is so fundamentally broken and mentally unwell that not even the Axolotl can really fix him. The best he can do is help Bill get to a point where he can begin again in a different form. But getting to that point is the real trouble. It's rotten work, a path laden with pain and suffering and hurt feelings, but it's the only option worth fighting for.

Scalene and Euclid feel immense guilt for the mistakes they made raising Bill. They allowed themselves to be pressured into trying to make their gifted son normal, and everyone they ever loved and then some ended up paying the price. Bill may have started the fire, but their misguided good intentions handed him the match.

Bill himself is a whirlwind of emotions. He is unexplainably relieved that his parents are alive, but that also means that he can no longer possess a false bravado and pretend he intentionally slaughtered his entire dimension. His past is red and blue and in his face, and the voices have only gotten louder since he saw his mother's heartbroken face. Not only that, but they have, in his eye, replaced him with two of the people destined to destroy him! They look at Shooting Star and Pinetree with all the fondness they used to look at him with, and it makes his insides burn.

They also are constantly setting off each other's triggers, like some kind of sick oroborus of trauma. Bill's powers often manifest as pyrokinesis, which isn't great when your parents are still living with the horrific injuries caused by said fire. On the other side of the coin, Euclid has been soothing the twins with gentle TV static since they were little, since his preferred method of manifestation is screen-based technology, (whereas Scalene prefers music and books) which has caused Bill to spiral into a violent panic attack more than once.

As for Ford... well, neither Cipher parent is fond of him, as i've stated, but while they don't know the entire story of how his and Bill's time together was, they know enough to know that it ended in violence and misery, and they are not so heartless that they do not feel pity for the man and disgust towards their son's actions. They make it very clear to their eldest, when they can stand to speak to each other, that he is to never possess another member of the Pines family.

He only breaks that promise once, though it was for a good reason. Gideon needed a good beat down, and Pine Tree was too hurt to make that jump without help.

[dromaeo-sauridae]

big cave post

you like caves? no? im showing you anyway. you hear cave and probably think of like, a video game cave. maybe a minecraft cave with axolotls? while i have my gripes with axolotls in caves, this is about the caves themselves. so here, lets get started:

number 1, lod cave in thailand. now, i could do a whole posts about JUST caves in thailand, but here's your first taste of caves from this area. this is a karst cave, formed by water trickling through soluble rock like limestone. it's what most of the caves on this list are going to be. it's one of the most common types of caves. if you've been inside a cave, it was probably a karst. very cool! i particularly enjoy the man shaped stalagmite in the middle (joke, thats just a real guy)

number 2, ellison's cave in georgia, usa. featuring a drop over a thousand feet deep, this one is pretty high on my bucket list. this is what's called a chute, formed by waterfalls cascading downwards. not recommended for people with a fear of heights! if you watch jacon geller, youve probably heard of this type of formation when he talked about krubera (not on this list, sadly)

number 3, mammoth cave in kentucky, usa. one i've been to! mammoth is the longest cave system in the ENTIRE world, that we know of. another one the jacob geller fans are familiar with. i would love to go back someday, pictures dont convey the magnitude of this place. they also used to host church services in here. well worth the visit

number 4, han son doong in vietnam. the LARGEST cave in the world! wait, didnt i already list that? nope, while mammoth is the longest and is massive in its own right, son doong trumps it by having a ceiling 660 feet (200 meters) high. it has stalagmites the size of skyscrapers. its one of the many caves in southeast asia to have its own rainforest system. a bit of a hike to get there, but another i desperately want to visit someday.

number 5, fingal's cave in scotland. though not record setting, its one youve probably seen before. or, maybe my perspective has been skewed as someone who looks at a LOT of caves. ive seen this exact picture more times than i can count. its a sea cave formed from our good friend columnar basalt. upon further research, apparently its also known for its natural acoustics. the more you know!

number 6, grotta azurra in capri. that photo isnt edited! only accessible by boat (and laying flat on your back to get through the entrance) this place looks ridiculously magical. i dont really have much to say about this one, i just think its really cool.

number 7, domica cave in slovakia. this one was brought to my attention by an anonymous asker (if youre still here hi) and i am in love with it. just an absolutely gorgeous cave with some of the most beautiful formations ive ever seen. just look at it! augh! the tiered pools arent something ive seen in any of the caves ive been to and theyre captivating. i love caves.

number 8, ending it off with a bang. here's the gloup.

[starlitsequins]

kill your darlings (ao3)

The Duchess Approves is terrible. He wants to bleach every brick of his body just to purify himself of this three hour experience. He wants to pluck out his eyeball and treat it to a ten-day spa as reparations. He demands a sequel from the Axolotl during their next therapy session. The Axolotl tilts their head. “There's no sequel. Only one movie has ever been made.” Bill glowers. “But what happens after?” “Production went into debt after casting big name Grampton St. Rumpterfrabble,” the Axolotl answers sadly. “Rumor has it he charges fifty thousand per letter.” “Wonderful,” Bill drawls. “Real useful information. So what am I supposed to do now, doc?” The Axolotl’s eyes gleam suspiciously. “I suppose there’s always fanfiction.”

Or: Bill hates a certain fanfic author almost as much as he hates the man who killed him. Crazy, wouldn't it be, if the two were the same person.

[almostangrything]

...I have 205 followers?!

Literally thank you guys so much, I love you all. Although I won't finish it for a while,

@lavenderwhirls @yumnasfunblogsaysfreesudan @sleepdeprivedsimp234 @alchemicalwerewolf @bunnybens-blog

@snailcheeserulz @septicnervez @pile-of-cats @doomwolfe @thecedarsights

@wrathofsanguinius @trashlike @hellzeevee @hildanasr5 @1greyscale1

@liinakhamees @mohammedgaza15 @axolotl-detector @mylifeingotham @surely-heaven-waits-for-you

@fatmafamily @nadadohann @najahmeq9 @wasimhourani32 @anonym0219

@gazano0or @maramplog @bubble-guppies-baby @mutantteenageninjabitch @savebatsfromscratch

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@horrorfag420 @rat-detector-15 @waseem-family @hananmahmoud1 @fancyymyheartt

@wheatley--man @g00se69 @shikatunoclock @four-corners-dude @sirenqueenthefishandtheweeewoooo

@majedgerbawi @askfrancie @hamadamontaha @mahmoud04 @the-angel-academic

@nourfamilys-worldr

[newkatzkafe2023]

Hellooooo

I heard that Sun Wukong's not good at swimming

SOOOO.... If the Sun Wukong's had a s/o who is so good at swimming (like a mermaid or an axolotl demon(I love axolotls:3) or something related to a fish demon) and that they love to teach them how to

But knowing how big they're ego is

This is gonna be fun :)

Stay safe and healthy 💕

Now it's your turn to be a little smug😉🤭 I Also love Axolotls They are surprisingly cute ☺️☺️☺️

(Lmk Wukong) God you look so cute swimming to content and carefree. I think he loves water but he can't swim to good, all he does is float in the water like driftwood or a dead body. He would mostly just float on One of those inflatable pool chairs while you would swim next to him and as you guys chat and share snacks.

(MKR Wukong) This is so embarrassing, he watches you swim 🏊‍♀️ so easily and professionally and he'll be the equivalent of a sinking stone😑😠 He refuses to let you teach him because he wants to impress you himself but it's still cute and funny. After a few weeks and many failed attempts he begrudgingly ask you for some swimming lessons which you were more then happy to give.

(HIB Wukong) Oh yeah he's not a swimmer at all, but he has no problem watching you enjoy your time in the water. You have offered swimming lessons but he was very interested but he Definitely has you teach the children under his supervision. He does like to watch you all swim together it looks like a little family spending time together on the beach.

(NR Wukong) He's as good of a swimmer as sonic the hedgehog🙄🙄🙄( Remember the first episode of Sonic x😒😒😒) He would sink to the bottom if you let him not to mention he wouldn't drown but he would be stuck on the bottom. You have to pull him out of the water a lot, but you don't mind, you always offer to help him just as long as you spend the day with him it's totally fine.😊😊😊

(Netflix Wukong) I can't believe I'm saying this but he's the best swimmer out of the other four above👆. He tends to try and show off his basic swimming skills to you despite you being a Axolotl monkey demon who is know for swimming. You never judge him on it though because it's easy for you to secretly teach him and Suitably teach him but you really do enjoy swimming with him.

(BMW Wukong) This man has way too much pride for his own good. Of course, you're on stand-by in case he makes an ass of himself while trying to impress you. You all know he probably has little to no swimming skill, and all that armor he's seen wearing doesn't help his case. At this point, it feels like you're a life guard watching a swimming for beginners student, but you keep that to yourself It's a fun secret project anyway.

(Destined one) Also a good swimmer but he enjoys getting tips and lessons from you. Infact swimming in the lake or river is what you guys do for most of your dates. It also gives him an excuse to hold you close, and you love being intimate with him and vise versa. He also loves how cute and pink and happy you are in the water.

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG🏊‍♀️

[bethanythebogwitch]

Wet Beast Wednesday: giant salamanders

Everyone knows salamanders, right? The little lizard frogs that show up around ponds. Well what if I told you that not all salamanders are little. In fact, some species can get quite large, but none get bigger than the aptly-named giant salamanders. I'm not just talking about any big newt, I'm talking about the unique members of the family Cryptobranchidae.

(Image: a Chinese giant salamander. It is a large, lizard-shaped animal with brown skin and black blotches. Its limbs are short and its tail is flattened to look like a long fin. It has wrinkly folds of skin along the side. End ID)

There are three(ish) species of giant salamander in two genera: the Japanese and Chinese giant salamanders of the genus Andrias and the hellbender of genus Cryptobranchus. The name Cryptobranchidae means "hidden gills", which is appropriate as giant salamanders are unique in that they are the only salamanders who reaming fully aquatic as adults without retaining external gills into adulthood. All salamanders are aquatic as juveniles and have external gills and many groups have independently evolved to remain fully aquatic as adults. However, other species, from axolotls to olms, adapted by retaining their external gills as adults, a trait called neoteny. Giant salamanders have had to find another way, especially since a body as large as their needs quite a bit of oxygen. Their solution was to take a common amphibian trait and turn it up to 11. It is common among amphibians to be able to absorb dissolved oxygen in water through their skin. This is usually a supplement to either gills or lungs, but giant salamanders use it as their main means of respiration. The skin is thin and filled with small veins that can perform gas exchange with the water. Giant salamanders evolved very wrinkly skin flaps along ther sides to increase the amount of surface area available for gas exchange, allowing them to sustain themselves. They do require access to running water with a high oxygen content, as still or low-oxygen water doesn't provide enough oxygen to survive. They do have lungs, but use them more for buoyancy control than breathing.

(Image: a man holding/bear higging a giant salamander. The salamander is longer than his torso, not including the tail. end ID)

The Japanese and Chinese giant salamanders are very closely related to each other and rather similar in physiology and behavior. There's also not just one Chinese salamander. Genetic testing has reveals that what was once called Andrias davidianus is actually a species complex. This is when what was thought to be one species turns out to actually be a group of related species. There is some debate over whether the five identified populations of Chinese giant salamander should be classified as subspecies or their own species, though the latter interpretation seems to be the most popular. All the populations are very similar and can interbreed with each other, so I'll discuss them as a group. The largest of the group (and world's largest amphibian) is the South China giant salamander (Andrias sligoi) which can reach 1.8 m (5.9 ft) and 50 kg (110 lbs), but adults average 1.15 m (3.8 ft) and 25-30 kg (55-66 lbs). The Japanese giant salamander (Andrias japonicus) reaches a slightly smaller maximum size of 1.5 m (5 ft) and 25 kg (55 lbs), with most being smaller. The Chinese and Japanese giant salamanders are closely related enough that they can hybridize.

(Image: a Japanese giant salamander resting on mossy rocks underwater. Its body is light brown with darker blotches and the head is covered in nodules. End ID)

Because of how closely related the Japanese and Chinese salamanders are, their biology and behavior are quite similar. They are mostly a dark brown color, but can also be other tones of brown, reddish, or black. The eyes are lidless, small, and poorly-developed, giving the salamanders poor eyesight. Their primary sense comes from the lateral line, a line of hair cells that extends down the body and sense movement of the water. Using the lateral line, the salamanders can sense the movement of prey and threats in the water around them. They utilize suction feeding, slowly approaching prey, then rapidly opening the mouth to generate a vacuum and suck food into the mouth. The prey is then killed or incapacitated with a powerful bite. The esophagus is lined with powerful muscles and uses mucus as lubricant to allow the salamander to swallow large prey. The head and throat have nodules on them, the arrangement and number of which can be used to differentiate Chinese and Japanese salamanders. Both groups of salamander can secrete a strong-smelling, milky white substance to ward off predators. A low metabolism and generally low activity level allows the salamanders to last of up to a few years between meals. The Chinese salamanders can make vocalizations including barks, hisses, and sounds very similar to the crying of a human baby. The hellbender (Cryptobranchus alleganiensis) is smaller than it's Asian relatives, reaching a length of 30-74 cm (12-29 in) and up to 2.2 kg (5 lbs). They are usually brown or reddish-brown, but can also have a gray, yellowish, or black coloration. Hellbender biology and ecology is fairly similar to that of their relatives.

(Image: a hellbender underwater. It looks like the other two species, but is smaller, lighter brown, and has no nodules on the head. End ID)

Chinese and Japanese giant salamanders live in cool, clear streams and rivers in the Yangtze river basin (Chinese) and the islands of Honshou, Kyushu, and Shikoku (Japan). Hellbenders live in similar treams in the eastern United states, with one population (which may be a subspecies) living in the Ozarks region. As predators, their diets include worms, fish, crayfish, freshwater crabs, other amphibians, and small mammals. They are also cannibals and will opportunistically feed on smaller members of their own species. All species are territorial animals that will attempt to drive others out of their territory, though hellbenders are less territorial than the other species. Hellbenders prefer to live in cavities dug out under rocks, which helps them shelter from predators. Due to their low metabolisms, giant salamanders live much longer than most amphibians. Captive individuals have been recorded living for 60 years (Chinese), 52 years (Japanese), and 25 years (hellbender). All species are nocturnal.

(Image: a hellbender emerging from beneath a rock with a crayfish in its mouth. End ID)

Mating occurs seasonally, triggered by warmer water in the summer. During this period, males will search for ideal nesting sites, leaving their territories if necessary. An idea nesting site is sheltered beneath a rock. There are often fewer nesting sites than males, meaning only the largest and strongest males will be able to claim nests. Males then use courtship displays to woo females. Alternatively, male hellbenders will chase passing females into the nests and refuse to let them leave until they mate. Unlike most salamanders, giant salamanders practice external reproduction, where the female lays eggs and then the male fertilizes them. The male then guards the nest until the eggs hatch. During this period, he will keep the nest and eggs clean and use his tail to keep water moving over them. Males will eat eggs that are unfertilized, unhealthy, or show signs of infection. This helps keep the other eggs as healthy as possible. The offspring are born with external gills, which they will lose as they mature. It can take several years for the larvae to reach maturity.

(Image: a group of giant salamander larvae in captivity. They look like smaller versions of the adults, but with feathery gills emerging from each side of the neck. End ID)

Both hellbenders and Japanese giant salamanders are classified as vulnerable by the IUCN, while Chinese giant salamanders are critically endangered. Their primary threats are habitat loss as streams are dammed, dry up, or become polluted. Warming water temperatures also threaten them. Chinese giant salamanders have experienced a major drop in population since the 1950s. In addition to habitat loss, Chinese giant salamanders are also eaten by humans. While hunting wild specimens is now illegal in China, they are heavily impacted by poaching. The fine for poaching giant salamanders is pathetically small compared to the sale price for one of them, further encouraging poachers. Captive breeding and release programs have shown some success, but may have contributed to the spread of disease. In response to the rarity of the salamanders, a new farming industry has sprung up in, raising giant salamanders for food. The captive population of Chinese giant salamanders in farms vastly exceeds the estimated wild population. Chinese giant salamanders have also been introduced to Japan, where they have been hybridizing with the Japanese salamanders, a major hindrance to conservation efforts. Japanese giant salamanders have been legally protected since 1951. The origin of the name hellbender is unknown. Other names for hellbenders include the water dog, Allegheny alligator, grampus, snot otter, and (my personal favorite) lasagna lizard.

(Image: a holding pen in a Chinese giant salamander farm. Over a dozen salamanders are sitting in a shallow water enclosure stocked with bricks and small fish. End ID)

I will leave this post off with a weird fact. In 1726, a Swiss physician named Johann Jakob Schuechzer declared a fossil giant salamander to be the remains of an ancient human who died in the mythical flood of Noah's ark and named it Homo diluvi, meaning "man who witnessed the deluge". In 1812, paleontologist Georges Cuvier examined the fossil and realized (probably very quickly) that it definitely wasn't a human. Once the fossil was identified as a salamander it was given the name Andrias scheuchzeri. As Andrias means "image of man", both the genus and species names acknowledge Schuechzer's weird idea.

Behold: a man (Image: the original Andrias scheuchzeri fossil that Schuechzer thought as a human. It is a front half of the skeleton of what is clearly a lizard-shaped animal and not a human. End ID)

[bitterkarella]

Identifying furries by their fursonas

Fox- this is the default fursona for the default furry, namely a twink with a blown out fucked to death asshole

Vixen- Girl fox referred to as a vixen is an egg, girl fox just referred to as a fox is an out trans woman

Kistune - the same as above but weeb flavor

he-wolf - a greasy guy who weighs 12 pounds soaking wet and wears a fedora. republican.

she-wolf - the butchest bull dyke you ever saw

coyote - manic depressive. always on something. the drug connection at any furry party

Cat- always a woman

black cat - could be any gender but always goth

kitten/kitty - a trans sex worker, has an only fans they really want you to know about.

bobcat - older dude. wants people to think he's ex-military

Jaguar - an older black guy. will probably have the word "black" in his fursona's name

lion - just a huge asshole

tiger - another asshole. old. wants you to believe he's ex military or ex-police, probably a member of the dorsai irregulars. major grill dad vibes

jackal - a huge asshole and a slut. white gay racist, probably transphobic

cougar - either a trans woman or a terf. there's no in between

Horse - white woman who identifies as 2 Spirit or a guy who wants to be stomped on

Pony - gay nazi

unicorn - either the absolute gayest dude you can be or a 9 year old girl. sometimes a late in life transition

Tanuki - latino

badger - either a huge lesbian or an old avuncular straight guy. possible sex pest

Raccoon - nature's greatest mistake. too normie to be furry, too furry to be normie. dilf.

bat - either a goth or a real annoying shit (some overlap). invader zim fanboy. doesn't drink alcohol but claims to act crazy on "sugar highs." definitely has dabbled in webcomics

cow - a woman. maternal. mom friend or mommy dom. milf. possibly trans femme

steer - a big strong fat rough trade gay guy

sheep - mom vibes

pretty much any farm animal - mom vibes

domestic pig - wild card. might be a wet and messy fetish thing tho or a trash eating thing. loves to be stinky. loves to talk about being stinky.

wild pig - trans masc

skunk - either a fat beardy guy who has a tumblr blog about animation squash & stretch or a stoner gal. very straight. the straightest. a kinsey 0. has strong feelings about what the fandom used to be like before there were all these kids in it.

rat - is a huge asshole as a front, probably likes talking cigars

lemur - autistic

sloth - 420 blaze it. will never finish any commissions

chakat - an older cishet man who thinks the fandom is too political & refers to "anime" as "japanimation"

sergel - nazi

citra - the biggest dipshit you've ever met

procyon - furry equivalent of the thomas jefferson miku binder pic. you should not be talking to this person, this is a literal child

weasel - a girl with cluster b personality disorders

ferret - a person who has at least one pet ferret, but probably many

mole - this person thinks they're in a beatrix potter story

guinea pig/chinchilla/jerboa/gerbil/any kind of fat rodent you can keep as a pet - the sweetest person you will ever meet

armadillo/pangolin/anteater/aardvark - smug, contrarian. "i just wanna be different"

mouse - vore fetishist, prey. sub.

hyena - vore fetishist, pred. probably trans masc

otter - a dommy twink, possible enby

bear - gay

panda - absolutely a white person pretending to be asian. probably running a gofund me scam with a suspicious story about how they're a professional nintendo gamer who injured their hand or something

bullfrog - a huge fat hairy straight guy

any other frog - inflation or rubber fetishist

axolotl/newt/salamander - genderfluid enby

rabbit - trad wife trans woman

squirrel - autistic and gay

deer - gay

gazelle - zootopia megafan

monkey - punk DIY artist type, definitely loves weed

ape - absolutely baffling. nothing this person does or says makes any sense. you will be left wondering whether you're speaking to a child, a person with severe mental issues, or someone who doesn't have english as a first language

elephant - mom friend

hippo - a fat fetishist or a transformation fetishist

rhino - an older cishet dude who wants to project a curmudgeonly yet approachable aura

kangaroo - definitely not an australian person. extremely focused kinkster, usually feet or inflation. more STDs than should be possible to carry

koala - an asian woman

virginia opossum - anarchist/communist punk trans man who makes zines and/or comics

australian possum - just here to have fun. wants everyone else to be having fun too. wacky funster. (sugar gliders and flying squirrels fall under this category)

any other marsupial - poser

monotremes - extreme poser, don't even bother

doberman- gay dude who tops from the bottom or a cop (there is some overlap)

german shepherd - a nazi or a cop (there is substantial overlap). definitely a furry raider. he will wear his cop uniform to con and after con will post videos pretending that someone was rude to him

afghan - arch femme

basset hound - racist

puppy - sub, probably an egg. extremely draining. cries a lot

all other dogs - just dudes being bros (gender neutral)

dragon - the furries of furries. like to talk about eating "sammiches" and "chocklit." probably an adult baby lifestyler. they will send DMs that just say "hi." they like to RP and when they contact you about a potential commission they are actually just trying to trick you into RP

griffin - the same as above but also a brony

snake - sissy hypno fetishist

turtle - an old man, probably southern. an ironic grandpa.

other scalies - furry in denial. either a child or an old person from CYD. the world's last something awful goons

any fursona with latino vibes - white

any fursona with asian vibes - latino

any fursona with native american vibes - eastern european

avian - girl who's not like other girls. hippie. vegan.

raven/crow - agender voidgoth

chicken - mom vibes

dinosaur - the absolute biggest nerd. probably has an actual degree in paleontology. definitely dresses like miss frizzle.

any invertebrate - not a real furry, their girlfriend just made them get a furaffinity account before they could get ass. either that or they've never even heard of furry, they just came up with the idea of anthropomorphics from first principles. a biology teacher or weirdo (there is some overlap)

amoeba - this is a troll