#best panel in homestuck ever thank you homestuck^2

[marionjabbs]

jade and kanaya's conversations in canon:

jade and kanaya's conversations post-canon:

[thewebcomicsreview]

Homestuck 2 has updated. It’s a Christmas Miracle! As always, this liveblog is tagged “Homestuck 2 Liveblog” is you want to filter it out. Today, we’re still in Candlyland, and it’s time to meet the Vriskas! 

For those who blocked out the epilogues, the one in the stripes is Vriska Maryam-Lalonde, who was adopted by Rose and Kanaya, and the shadowed Vriska is Vriska Serket, the post-retcon version who went to defeat Lord English. She definitely just fucked and killed Gamzee, despite the fact that she is 16 and he is middle-aged. Since having two characters named “Vriska” is confusing, Vriska Serket is getting referred to as (Vriska), in parenthesis, but just to make sure we don’t get any less confused, the pre-retcon Vriska Serket was also called (Vriska) and is presumably out in space somewhere with pre-Retcon Terezi since those two were last seen cuddling in the Furthest Ring watching the universe collapse from a safe distance in what is arguably the “end” of Homestuck’s alpha timeline, but could very plausibly also have gotten sucked into the Black Hole and landed on Candyland Earth.

Okay, everyone understand what’s going on? No? Fuck you, it’s Homestuck. 

Minutes in the past, but not many, (Vriska) pockets John’s phone before she can worry too much about waiting for a reply from Terezi.

Oh, right, Vriska has John’s phone and thus can communicate with the alive Terezi on Dirk’s ship, the one remaining connection between Candyland and Meatspace. 

Oh man, if Homestuck was still popular you’d see this cosplay at anime conventions a lot, wouldn’t you?

VRISKA: That’s the Right Call. VRISKA: So, Nickname me, 8itch. And make it Cute.

Okay, disregard my entire opening Paragraph. Vriska Serket is now back to being Vriska with no parenthesis, and Vriska Maryan-Lalonde is now nicknamed “Vrissy” so that everyone gets a unique-ish name. Hooray, we’re all caught up. Also there’s like an 80% chance these two are going to get together at some point. Also also, what’s up with Vriska’s eyepatch? 

She didn’t have that in Act 7, and she didn’t get it in the epilogues, I just checked, and there’s no space in-between Act 7 and the epilogues or the epilogues or now for her to have gotten it off-screen. These panels are going out of their way to hide her eyes, but since the epilogues explicitly confirmed she has normal eyes (and thus is still alive), I don’t know what they’re hiding.

VRISSY: Yeah, but Vrissy is a Thing now. Roll with it. TAVROS: Okay, uh,, Vrissy, VRISSY: We kinda Need a Ride

Speaking of mysteries, why does Tavros Crocker have a troll typing quirk if he’s the son of two humans, and thus presumably a human himself, with no relation whatsoever to the original Tavros? I can’t help but notice Tavros is typing in Gamzee purple instead of Tavros’s original bronze color, so I have a terrifying feeling that Tavros is going to be the biological son of Jane and Gamzee somehow and the epilogues just danced around that. Maybe I’m being too pessimistic.

Oh thank Christ. Also there is absolutely nothing interesting on Vriska’s face, so I’m not sure why there were hiding it. Maybe they figured some people would forget Vriska’s alive and wanted to milk a little drama from the casual readers? I dunno. Maybe I’m over-thinking this as well as pessimistic. Still wondering where that eyepatch came from, though. 

Aww, he’s cute. I like his snazzy suit jacket. Also: This is the first named character in the entirety of Homestuck to have come out of a vagina like a normal person instead of being a an ecto-clone.

I don’t think white pants are a great idea in an artstyle where the humans aren’t colored in, though. He looks like he’s Donald Ducking it. 

There’s a Pulp Fiction joke to be made here but I’m not gonna say it

This is very obviously Harry Anderson Egbert. He is a bit less cute. It is very weird to see unimportant background humans in Homestuck. None of the kids in the original comic ever interacted with another human, or mourned the deaths of a single person when the earth was destroyed. Which, conservation of detail and all that, but it still makes it weird to see just Bob Fedorafreak or whoever walking by.

HARRY ANDERSON: yo. VRISSY: Hey HARRY ANDERSON: hey babe, what’s up?

Hm, Harry Anderson (Never just Harry?) refers to Vriska as “babe”, which is rather friendly (Edit from the future: Harry and Vrissy are dating, Vrissy and Tavros are kismesis). Gives me the vibe of like a Hollywood agent, and I suppose his always being “Harry Anderson” backs that up.

I do like this character, or what little we’ve seen of him so far in literally two pages. As the child of the two main families, he’s got the Strilonde “Must be cool at all times” thing mixed in with the Harleybert “Kind of heart, dumb of ass” thing. I also can’t help but notice that Homestuck 2 has almost immediately set up a team of four teenagers, two boys and two girls, two humans and two trolls. If John/Jade/Rose/Dave are the Beta Kids, and Jane/Jake/Roxy/Dirk are the alpha kids, these are, what, the pre-release kids? The Delta Kids? I like the Delta Kids.

VRISKA: You said this was a schoolhive, yeah? VRISKA: We can just dump it in the inciner8or. That’s pro8a8ly what his plan was to 8egin with. VRISSY: The what???????? VRISKA: The inciner8or. Like, for 8odies?? VRISSY: At SCHOOL???????? VRISKA: Yes?

Okay,this got a laugh out of me. A big complaint of Homestuck was that we never got the original four kids all in a room interacting with each other, and now we have a new quartet and they’re immediately in a car together. I’m digging this dynamic of them all being wildly incompetent but in different ways, and if Homestuck 2 is going to have a lot of this kind of thing I’m down for it.

Vriska and Tavros have, through some tortured logic and misunderstanding, decided that the best way to hide Gamzee’s corpse is to carry it into school with them to meet Harry Anderson because they think he has a plan and don’t know he thinks they were joking and has no plan at all. This is legitimately great. Look how confident Vriska is! She thinks this is an amazing plan! And why wouldn’t she? She’s the Thief of Light and she literally has Superpowers that make her super-lucky. 

This is, and I say this in complete sincerity, the most fun Homestuck’s been in years. 

I’m fucking sold on this comic. This is exactly what Homestuck needed. 

It’s a Christmas miracle, everyone. Homestuck is good again. (At least for now)

[snowtimeisbesttime]

Thoughts and questions (remix) on Friendsim Volume 6.

Kuprum & Folykl:

>mfw another james roach track // Link removed just in case; it led to the panel in Homestuck page 7205.

-We now have extra confirmation that psionic energy is produced in the eyeballs. What we don’t know is if loss of both eyes (as in, in an accident or an “accident”) can cause voidrot (Cirava lost their psionics (?) when they gouged out their eye, while Sollux could use his after losing his eyes- voidrot probably wasn’t A Thing back then though).

-Kuprum is sort of a spiritual successor to Mituna; not only does he have the 4chan shtick like him, he wants to become pretty much the next Psiioniic and therefore his literal successor.

-When push comes to shove we see Kuprum chooses Folykl (the obvious and best choice) rather than the Empire. Now let’s hope these two never ever find themselves in a situation like that again please.

-Like seriously, Folykl is more cullable to a drone than a fucking alien. Does Kuprum seriously think that Trizza “bombed a fucking town for a selfie bg*” Tethis or whoever owned his theoretical ship would let her stick around? Would he even be able to give her energy if he had an entire spaceship draining his powers? Can we get these two to Earth C ASAP?? // on foly being canonically more cullable than MSPAR: in Karkat's PQ route they Do ping drones' Murder Sensors, by way of having too high a body temperature. Seeing as Joey *seems* to be doing just fine with the troll disguise we've seen in Act 2 screenshots so far, which doesn't even have a way to disguise her human skintone, leads me to believe that SHE'S going to be the last straw that would eventually lead to the “all these fuckers around 37ish ºC Must Die Horribly” status quo in Alterniabound's time.

-Joey's disguise not involving gray paint of some sort also kinda sticks out, because the one color her skin canonically can't be is troll gray... guess we'll see how that plays out in Act 2 proper. There's also the possible implications of her wearing Dammek's sign (those implications being identity theft, unless it doesn't matter because he's bronze and Alternia sucks ass, as well as the fact that at least some of the troll call guys ought to know Dammek, and trolls having the same sign is sort of a Big Fucking Deal that we've only seen with ancestor – descendant pairs so far...)

*is it ever explicitly mentioned if Trizza knew that Dammek, Xefros and perhaps more rebels lived in Outglut? I’m pretty sure she knew, but she’s petty enough to bomb a random town

-What were they going to do to the Random Bluebloods?

-Folykl's Troll Call bulletpoints were basically reworded and little else, while Kuprum's weren't changed.

Elwurd:

-Elwurd is gr8.

-“There must be some cultural context that makes them turn to a fake relationship for security”, such as “get into a relationship and provide genetic material or die”

-So what happened between Elwurd and Bronya? If we ever find out it’ll have to be in Hiveswap Act 2 (or in another spinoff)… Neither of them seem to be quite over it, though it never came up in any of Bronya’s routes. (i feel it probably has to do with what Elwurd said, “nice trolls never change”) // Bronya likely didn't tell Elwurd she was a cloistered jade, at the very least.

-Apparently jadebloods also get sent off to space?? On the one hand I get why because the Sufferer’s entire rebellion was only possible thanks to the Dolorosa, but in the other hand I’m pretty sure it was mentioned in Homestuck that almost all adult trolls leave Alternia? However, Doc Scratch said that the Condesce sent everyone but the children to space after the Summoner’s rebellion, so rest in pieces headcanon that jadebloods stay in the caverns their whole life (201?-2018). You will be used in AUs.

-Does the Condesce have the jade kids just do cavern stuff until they get conscripted then?? Is that what jade school is?? // only a select few jade kids, apparently.

-As far as I can tell, Elwurd’s poster with the two (?) jadebloods says Make Out, while the CD says Kayroa. The last poster was too far away for me.

-If slam poetry is rap, then excessive bodily force poetry is…?

-Elwurd's new Troll Call bulletpoints completely replace her older ones (as in they're totally different) and reinforce her Friendsim characterization, particularly her use of many aliases and her dealing drugs. The last bulletpoint references MSPAR's crush on her in her route, but might kinda imply something regarding Joey? Like, we know she likes girls and is probably going to realize and come to terms with it in Alternia...

*special mention to her not being stated to have her shit together anymore, nor knowing your mom, which many of us took to mean she somehow met A. Claire through Snek Portal Shenanigans on the latter's part. If being a Vriska as in character concept refers to being sort of a real fucking jerkass with a tragic backstory and/or reason for being such a dick that involves being forced to do horrible stuff since a very young age by an external influence (read: vaska herself and ardata) then... elwurd seems to still not be a vriska?? wait does that make trizza a vriska or. Is there trizzacourse in alternia

-also going by the other aliases as seen in the new troll call thingy it seems like she's the embodiment of “be gay do crime”

[dukeofriven]

Fun Jade/Rose Facts (Well... facts.)

Note: These facts are divided between “In-Comic” (Everything from Page 1 of Homestuck (A young man stands in his bedroom...) to page 8128 (The End) and “The Credits” (Pages 8129-8130). If I update this after the Epilogue, we’ll... cross that bridge when we get there.

In-Comic Jade/Rose Facts

Jade and Rose have only five conversations in the entire comic.

1 2 3 4 (2 pages) 5 (2 pages)

Conversation #4 is repeated. We see it first from Jade’s POV, then from Rose’s.

The number of conversations goes up to six if you count GrimBark Jade saying “Bark” and “Hey guys long time no see” to the assembled group in Act 6 Intermission 5 - but since Rose says nothing back, I am not counting this as a conversation.

You may do so if you wish.

After removing dialogue tags (like “TT”) and Pesterlog archival data (“ceased pestering” etc), their shortest conversation is their fourth at 80 words long.

Their longest one-on-one conversation is their third at 571 words long.

Their longest conversation is their fifth. It features Doc Scratch, and runs some 1,170 words long.

All told, about 2,711 words are exchanged in one-another’s chat windows. Discounting Doc Scratch��s intrusion into their final conversation, they speak 2324 words to one-another.

If you are counting the Grimbark conversation, add another 7 words.

6 if ‘BARK” is more of a sound.

By contrast, this single one-page Fruity Rumpus Asshole Factory exchange between Dave, John, and Karkat runs some 2188 words - over a thousand words longer than any single Jade/Rose conversation, and only some 136 less than their entire conversation history.

Rose never speaks a single word to Jade aloud.

Rose never uses Jade’s name in conversation with her.

Jade and Rose "share the screen” 15 times during the comic. (I have excluded both Caliborn’s ‘Homosuck’ cutouts and his Plasticine maquette because A) they are facsimiles of an event recited by an even-more unreliable narrator than usual, not the real thing, and B) Seriously: Fuck That Guy)

One of these on-camera appearances was ret-conned out of existence.

In only seven of these appearances are both Jade and Rose conscious.

Here are all their on-camera appearances:

Act 6 Intermission 5

(Don’t think I ever noticed Gamzee hiding in the background before.) Act 6 Act 5

Act 7

(It’s tough to tell but I think the above photo is the closest Rose and Jade ever get in the comic.)

Rose never speaks to Jade again after their fifth conversation in Act 5 Act 2.

Rose and Jade do not converse for the entirety of Act 6.

Rose and Jade do not converse for the entirety of Act 7

Going off “page math” alone. here are some fun facts about Jade and Rose conversations:

5% - or about 1/20th of the comic - passes before Rose and Jade speak.

Rose and Jade spend 39% - 39/100ths - of the comic “in-touch” with one another.    

They spent the remaining 56% of the comic not talking.

Rose and Jade spend approximately 61% of Homestuck not in-contact, not in-touch with one another.

Counting the repeat conversation and a single still panel, there are only 9 pages in Homestuck where Rose and Jade are talking.

0.11072834645669291% of Homestuck - 5,536,417,323/5,000,000,000,000ths - (5.5 milliard billionths of the comic - 5.5 billion trillionths for our American readers. ~11/10000) is devoted to Rose and Jade’s “on-screen” relationship. And that’s counting a repeat conversation and a silent panel.

Rose and Jade “share” the screen - either while message-conversing or literally “in the same shot” in 20 pages of Homestuck.

That’s 0.24606299212598426% of Homestuck. About 24,606,299,213/10,000,000,000,000 (~1/400ths) of the comic.

Homestuck contains about 817,612 words.

Jade-Rose conversations all together comprise some 2779 words, taking into account that the fourth conversation is repeated twice.

Jade-Rose conversations comprise approximately 0.33989227163984875% of Homestuck’s text.

That’s 8497306791/2500000000000ths

Credits Jade/Rose Facts

There is no canonical evidence that Jade attended Rose’s wedding.

Seriously - she’s not there in the pictures. When all the kids are lifting the bride and bride up on chairs as part of the “thing done during the horah that isn’t actually part of the horah guess who just did a deep dive into the history of the horah did you know it’s from Greece via Romania and only dates back to 1930 as a traditional pan-Jewish custom it’s kind of like clan tartans in that it’s a cultural touchstone that feels ancient but isn’t” she’s... absent. Jake is in the picture twice once at the top, once in trickster mode on the bottom. Jade Harley: had better things to do than go to Rose’s wedding?

Jade and Rose are the only two kids to never be shown with Trickster modes.

This following photograph is the only conversation Rose and Jade ever have in-person in all the Homestuck franchise. It is their only moment of contact after Act 5 Act 2. We have no demonstrative way of proving that they ever conversed in-person before John’s 18th birthday party on Earth-C:

This is their only verbal conversation, and their only conversation to go textually unrecorded.

We have no way of proving that this is not Rose and Jade burying the hatchet after a... four year feud after Jade clumsily let Rose know her mother had been brutally murdered. 

This is 1.3297872340425532% of the entire credits video.

That’s 664893617/50000000000ths of the entire credits - because the only good joke is a cumbersome running joke.

BONUS: Snapchat Jade/Rose Facts

Welcome to the land of dubious canonicity. [Update 23/04/19: I’d like to note that I used this phrase before the Epilogues hit. Also, these are now officially outside of even the broader Homestuck meta-canon as far as anyone can tell. Radio silence on this remains aggravating. What were these and what did Andrew Hussie actually want?]

Do you remember the Snapchats? They didn’t stop being a thing or anything.

... well, they did, actually. Who knows if they’re canon any more. [Again: they are not]

That’s why this section is a bonus - its demi-canonical!

Man, remember when we were all excited that the future of Homestuck was going to be snapchats?

We were going to get so many snapped chats.

So many you guys.

Sigh.

Please no walking on the grass. That grass is only semi-canon. We are liable for damages with the rental company.

Jade and Rose appear together in one (1) snapchat photo:

I’m pretty sure this is the only Beta kids group shot in the entirety of Homestuck!

This Jade/Rose interaction comprises 1.5151515151515151% of all the snapchats.

That’s 946969697/62500000000ths.

That’s really all there is to say on the matter.

FAQ Will you cover the Epilogue?

I will, of course, update this most important resource if/when the Epilogue gives us any more Jade/Rose content. Statistically speaking, it won’t take up much space. You missed interaction [X]! Can I tell you about it?

Yes please! Thanks for letting me know, I will add it right away and update my maths.

You missed interaction [Caliborn’s Master Plan]! Can I -? You may not. This seems elaborate and kind of pointless - why would you do this? Because Jade/Rose is a ship and talking about the Jade/Rose friendship is a thing and I... uh... I didn’t get it. But now having done all this work I... ... I still don’t get it. I always questioned Jade/Rose because I said to myself “they don’t really interact much,” and now that I’ve sat down and run the numbers they really don’t interact much. Now if you’re wondering “did you run though every single conversation looking for the times Jade mentioned Rose or Rose mentioned Jade” the answer would be “ha ha ha that would be crazy of course I did.” I am very tired. And... they don’t talk about each-other much. I mean ‘actually’ talk - I’m not counting all the “hey do you know what Rose/Jade is doing” questions asked between the kids or the trolls (though there’s not that many, really) - I’m talking about actual conversations, like when John talks about how he feels about having to marry Rose according to the Shipping Chart or Karkat mutters that Jade maybe kind of meant something to him once. Jade has this to say about Rose - talking to, of all people, Eridan: GG: rose? GG: i do not have a score to settle with rose!!! GG: why would you think that?    CA: oh CA: wwell fuck CA: suppose i wwas guessin it wwas natural to presume somesuch relation like that betwween the twwo a you    GG: i think you are projecting your own attitude on to others GG: just because you tend to hate and/or hit on everyone you meet doesnt mean everyone else is that way GG: rose just sent me a code for a crystal ball, shes my friend and is basically the best!  It’s a very Harleybert sentiment. And sadly it doesn’t add up to anything. At the very least, Rose doesn’t think that much about Jade. Take it from me: a guy who literally went through every conversation Rose and Jade ever had with and about each other: Rose doesn’t think much about Jade. When Jade shows up sleeping at the end of act six lots of people talk about her: Rose’s only comment is to make a crack about Jade ending end-game ships when she wakes up, and also to note that there was Bird Dave and Dog Jade and Cat Rose but No [Animal] Egbert. That’s it. The most Rose ever has to say is the “she has the karma” conversation all the way back in Act 3 - and it’s still really about Dave. When GrimbarkJade shows up on LOLAR... Rose makes no comment whatsoever. Jade does not take the time to go see Rose when she wakes up in the ret-con timeline. Jade discusses Rose with John only in the context of John and his shipping chart destiny. Rose never seems to have anything to say about Jade to Dave or John. If these kids had had a normal sibling existence in the same high school and John had been hit by a car Jade would have remained friends with Dave but she and Rose would be revealed to not be all that close - their common point of friendship is John, not one-another. Rose talks about so much shit - but not about Jade. Jade might say Rose is “the best” but it’s Harley hyperbole more than anything: she didn’t even get Rose a birthday present because she says Rose is hard to shop for! Rose LaLonde is hard to shop for? What?

There. It’s an Emily the Strange t-shirt with Charles Dutton’s head. it took me ten seconds to come up with it you are welcome Jade. You want to ship Rose/Jade? Fuck yeah, man - go for it! You want to write an eighty thousand word fan-fiction on Rose and Jade: BFF Treasure Hunter Essayists? Sounds fucking rad please write that. You want to say that, canonically, Jade and Rose are great friends? I’m going to have to disagree. Homestuck is a story about four friends - it is not a story about four equally friendly friends. Maybe it was meant to be: not going to lie, I like Act 6 and the ending of Homestuck a lot but even I concede that Jade gets shafted in the “having shit to do” department - the fact that she sits out the big Giant Talky Session at the end of the comic? Weird as shit. If she was up and awake and had any kind of conversation with Rose where they seemed friendly and in-touch I would change my opinion in a heartbeat: I’m not some crank who hates Jade and Rose being best of friends because I’m a weirdo. I mean I am a weirdo but for other reasons, not this. No, I just don’t agree with the idea because it’s not supported by the text. Five conversations in seven acts? Less than 3,000 words exchanged in a document running into the hundred of thousands - and some of that repeat, and some of that the words of a giant cueball tool? If Andrew Hussie wanted us to believe that Jade Harley and Rose LaLonde are particularly close friends, he put no sign of that into the text. If I missed something please - tell me. Argue it with me, even, if you disagree with my assessment - or my math.I am not great at math. Regardless - reach out. We should talk about this more. Edit: Updated 10:38 EST April 12, 2019: corrected multiple typos, changed “dismissed” to “questioning,” clarified point about the horah to sound less weird.

[homesception]

May 31, 2013 - part 1: wherein Lobac eats a cookie.

To be fair, it has been like two hundred years since my last update.  That’s a pretty good nap.  Just means I’m all the more rested to work on new stuff, right?  I mean, I need to keep a spritely pace up if I still plan on catching up to Lobac’s liveblog before said liveblog catches up to the comic.  Which for sure is still an actual thing at all, and not a bit of exclusive humor between friends.

Last time Lobac was getting into some theory crafting and analysis of the classpect system.  I didn’t have much to say about that at the time, particularly not much that wouldn’t qualify as spoilers, so iirc I was mostly just responding with random thoughts and video links, half of which are dead now.  There was a bit left over looking at the troll’s perster names, which was also good stuff, but lacking anything coherent to say about it, I’ll just gloss past the rest of that post, apart from:

Lobac said:

Thank you all for sticking around °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

As if you could ever get rid of me.  ~{@PQ}~

Moving on, we rejoin the comic with PM visiting the Black Queen to retrieve the mysterious GREEN PACKAGE, which had been impounded by agents of the Black Court as a result of a traffic violation.  The Black Queen cuts an imposing figure, and Lobac is, of course, duly imposed.

later, Lobac said:

Are those… tentacles ( ´ _ ｀) I thought only the imps were affected by the prototypings?

OH SHIT OH SHIT THAT LOOKS SO COOL HOT DAMN (゜▽゜) Wowow look at her joints! Look at all the carapace-y stuff going on there!

These days, Lobac’s soft spot for this particular sort of shiny, black, possibly betentacled monster-type aesthetic is well documented.  I’m pretty sure she would have loved the black queen’s design even if it wasn’t just objectively cool as hell, but that certainly doesn’t hurt.  I’m kind of sad that we never got a proper fight scene out of this particular version of her.

That’s not a spoiler is it?  I’m pretty sure that’s not a spoiler.

Yeah, the random objects the kids threw in the general directions of their seizuresprites are directly affecting the final boss. NOTHING COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG HERE EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE

I don’t see the problem here.  Nothing the kids could possibly put in those sprites could be at all unsettling or dangerous.

haa haa.  hee hee.  hoo hoo.

Her face is so weird though It’s Jaspers-shaped, and her eyes are constantly narrowed, I can’t even tell whether it’s in distaste or amusement

Why not both?

Andrew sure is proud of that hand’s close-up She’s not even dramatically pointing she’s literally just saying “yeah I dunno anything about that kinda shit you best go down there and ask my pretty princess, I mean, subordinate”

It is a pretty great hand, honestly.  I think this particular image gets called back to a few more times yet.

Yeah Rose! You go and fulfill your as of yet unclear vaguely Seering-related destiny

Yeah, Rose!  Get on that, maybe!

ROSE NO YOU ARE 13 THAT IS GONNA TASTE AWFUL TO YOU Heh I legitimately don’t know whether her mom would be proud of or disappointed in her if she could see her now Is this an act of defiance or emulation Just silly teenage antics, probably, but I’d like to think she misses her

Rooooooose Rose nooooooooooooooooo （ ´ω｀） Ehehe I love how the artstyle turns super silly to reflect how upset/surprised she is

These two panels constitute one of the most iconic funny moments in the comic.  It works really well.  Shoot, I should have done the post topper-edit based on these, huh?  Oh, well.  The one I already did took like four hours, mostly due to my extreme rustiness, so I’m not going back now.

Otherwise, I also like to think of Rose missing her mom here.  Maybe not admitting it to herself, but still.  I also still ascribe to the “everything Mom ever did was 110% unironic, Rose made up the whole passive aggressive conflict between them in her head, her mom wasn’t passive agressive she was just a bonkers drunk rich lady” headcannon that I think I spoke about ages ago in this very liveblog.

Anyway, yeah, this is both a hilarious joke and a fantastic little character moment for Rose.  Another contributing factor to Rose being my big early favorite with a seemingly insurmountable head start in the ‘best character’ race.

Actually, lately, since the end of the comic, she’s been gaining ground again for me?  I mean, one of the trolls definitely surpassed her for most of my Homestuck fan life, but... eh, whatever.  There’s no way I can getting into how my feelings about those characters developed over the comics life without being way more spoilery than even I’ve already been, so that kind of talk will have to wait for later.  Even if later means ‘years from now’ or ‘never’.

BOO FUCKING YAH, IT’S THE WHITE QUEEN Or Windswept Questant, for now She’s also as of yet uncorrupted by the kids’ silly sprite shenanigans

Lobac had been waiting for this reveal for a while, I think.

PM: Command John to put the carved tablet into a pyxis.

You follow the command telling you to command John to put the carved tablet in the pyxis and type, “John, put the carved tablet into the pyxis.” You successfully do that, and he successfully does that too. Everyone is friendly and cooperative.

Ah yes, you so rarely get this kind of friendly cooperation from narrators these days

It was a rather uncommonly tidy sequence, for this comic.

Shit I just remembered those typing hands we saw when trying to name Jack, the reader is like a physically present entity??? Maybe???

What prompted this thought?  The earlier black queen hand image hanging in your head, then a bit about narrators entering text, and that old bit just pops up?  It’s cool how brains work, making intuitive connections and all that.

What if we eventually zoom out to reveal a human exile commanding everyone. We’ve only been watching that human mess around up until now. The real story begins when they just suddenly go “whelp that was kinda fun. gotta look for food tho” at an incredibly dramatic moment.They turn away from the console.  And then we watch them slump through the desert for thousands of pages and their journey of introspective self-discovery is the actual story. Yes.

Shit, Lobac just predicted the whole narrative!  No point in continuing this liveblog, I guess.  “[#P%]t

Well, obviously this means that WV has an uncanny knack for distances and PM has one for sounds AR can probably track down crimes by their scent He’s like McGruff the Crime Dog, but a little less fluffy

I used to love McGruff the Crime Dog.  Until I grew up and realized he was a tool of THE MAN.

dear gOD SHE REALLY IS PUTTING JACK IN DRESSES (*≧▽≦)ﾉｼ He and Slick are basically the same person, right? Oh man he is gonna stab the shit out of her one of these days

~{%|%}~

Jack Noir, more like JACK NO. NO YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE OUT THERE MURDERING PEOPLE AND FROLICKING THROUGH THE STREETS WITH YOUR ASSHOLE CREW. WHAT ARE YOU DOING THIS IS PATHETIC o(`д´ ｡)

I’d say this is a “be careful what you wish for” moment, but I think Lobac knew exactly what she was doing here.

Ticket? Oh, this thing. Ha, ha, look at that, you are holding a ticket. How did that get in your hand? It belongs on the desk with the others. No, you are not here to pay a parking ticket. You explain to the frightening man that you are here to pick up that green parcel.

GIVE ME A C! GIVE ME A U! GIVE ME A T AND I AND E! sheeEEEE’S A CUTIE!!!!

Honestly, they’re all cuties.  the cuteness of the entire cast, even the villains mostly, in both visual depiction and personality, really is a big selling point of the whole comic.

There was a time when I wasn’t super into cute things.  I was never viscerally opposed to cuteness, never when through a virulently anti-girly-stuff phase, but these days I’m MUCH more into things being cute.  I just like cute characters!  Sure, I like things that are somber and spooky, but the best is when they’re somber and spooky AND super cute!

Like, Hollow Knight.  That whole game is like exactly my favorite aesthetic these days.  Sad and morose and dark and adorable.

But more often than not homestuck still comes pretty close to that ideal.  You just want to hug the shit out of all of these doofuses, a few stab wounds here or there be damned.  Speaking of stab wounds...

WHOOPS TENSION. THIS IS NOT WHAT I MEANT. I DO NOT ACTUALLY WANT YOU TO START KILLING PEOPLE OK

Maybe Lobac didn’t know what she was asking for earlier.

Wait, the crowns, what the fuck, he wants her to KILL THE KING AND QUEEN??? SHE’S JUST A MAIL LADY ヾ(´･-･｀)ノ”

How does he even know she’s desperate enough to kill people just to get one package?

The PARCEL MISTRESS departs with her mission of double agency. You wonder if she’ll actually be so foolish as to attempt to uphold her end of the lopsided bargain. You make a policy of handing out a REGISWORD and a HITLIST to just about everyone who enters your office. But you never think anyone’s actually going to GO THROUGH with it. 

What a phenomenal asshole That explains that

pretty much.  As for the box itself...

Yeeeeah you’re not actually gonna show me so, go ahead, taunt me, get it over with

PFFFFPFPFPFPFFF WHAT SOMETHING COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS APPARENTLY? NOT AS RIDICULOUS AS HIS FACE THO. Magnificent asshole cutie

Hahah, \[&P%]/

Anyway, at this point the action cuts back to the kids, and that seems a good a time as any to take a break.  I could just save this as a draft and finish the rest of lobac’s post later?  I mean, then I wouldn’t have to take extra time for another panel edit?  But I kind of want to post something now, so I guess well do this one in parts again.  part 2 scheduled for, let’s be ambitious and say may 2022

How did I ever use to have the time for this blogging shit?  I’ve been working on this for like six hours, and only got like a third of the way through one update?  I guess I was just younger then.

I’m so old now.  Time just gets away from me.

And my back hurts all the time.

[rose-against-dersecest]

Vriska is irredeemable. She sexual assaulted tav (mspaint 004280), mentally manipulated him into wanting to date him which can also be seen as sexual assault (004283), crippled him, then constantly made abused him/made life hell for him (a whole bunch but 004251 really encapsulates them all), mind controls sollux into killing aradia, physiclay scars terezi for life in a move which, as far as she knew, would be a death sentence on a planet like Alternia /1

Creates jack, directly leading to a bunch more deaths. Experiments with Jade to try and get better at mind controlling humans, being directly responsible for all the times she fell asleep, which is a major source of jades depression. Sleeps John when he is trying to get Jade into the game, nearly killing Jade and forcing Bec to prototype himself, which is another source of grief for Jade and causes a bunch more problems for the human players (004827). /2

She is obsessed with Mindfangs journal, who was a rapist, slave owner and murderer. She specifically wants to imitate her life, which is why she peruses relationships with tav, eridan and kanaya. I'm bringing this up because in said book Mindfang RAPES the dolorosa and, again, Vriska wants to imitate mindfang in every way (005407). After her death and brief time as a sprite, we get a whole bunch more abuse and mental manipulation aimed at tav (006740) /3

Then she and Aranea straight up commit genocide by mind controlling a bunch of unwilling sentient beings into acting as bait for the god of death (007857). That's enough for now, i might come back and do more analysis on the last acts, but as you have pointed out before, being an abuse victim doesn't give you a free pass on doing shitty things, and this isn't even half of the abusive things she's done. Vriska is abusive and should not be allowed near terezi or anyone else, I'm glad shes dead /4

I’m not justifying or erasing the awful things Vriska has done, and I, too, hated her for the longest time. However, this entire summary of Vriska’s actions doesn’t bring up Doc Scratch’s (the literal evil omniscient pedophile that worked for Lord English) manipulation of Vriska or the fact that she was forced to kill others from birth or be eaten alive by her lusus. It doesn’t take into account Vriska being an abuse victim, like you briefly referenced, which is an essential part of her character that I missed out while first reading Homestuck, and thus why I despised her acting horrible for what I deemed as “no reason.”

You don’t have to love Vriska. Her actions were barbaric, yes, but they were ultimately necessary to ensure that her timeline wasn’t doomed. A Vriska that wouldn’t have created Jack or mind controlled everyone to fight against Lord English would have cursed everyone to die. She’s even so essential to the story as a whole that Terezi made John bring her back. Her existence is the retcon.

As well, Mindfang being a slave owner and rapist doesn’t automatically mean that Vriska should be viewed the same way-- parents aren’t automatically their children, and it was wrong for her to idolize Mindfang, but within the context of Alternian culture, where you must be strong and kill to survive, it’s quite understandable. Her looking up to Mindfang also harms Vriska, dude, because she’s not Mindfang no matter how much she wants to be, and she cannot force herself to harm and murder without guilt and shame (remember that Vriska is WRECKED afterwards by her maiming of her friends and regrets it to the point that she allows Robo Aradia to nearly beat her to death) or be sexually interested in men. 

Vriska assaulted Tavros, yeah! Her and Tavros had an incredibly toxic relationship and if those were the only moments we saw of Vriska, I’d completely despise her. Reading those panels for the first time was gut-wrenchingly horrible. I remember that experience clearly. Yet, Tavros forgives her. Just like Terezi and Aradia later do, as well. And with Terezi and Aradia, it was Doc Scratch who persuaded her to hurt them. In that panels before Vriska says she doesn’t even want to do it, but she gets told that she’s an worthless, evil person who can’t try and change fate, and thus does.

Like.... thanks for the time you put into your messages and looking up panels? Write some meta posts, if you want. But I’ve forgiven Vriska, a literal thirteen year old girl, like her victims who now consider her their friend again. Of course I still have problems with her mind-controlling the swathes of dead souls (I dunno if it would be considered genocide though, it’s indiscriminate and they’re already dead and thus cannot reproduce?) and her unwillingness to talk to and listen to Terezi on the platform, but like, I don’t blindly think she’s the worst character ever? and irredeemable? and yeah she was Tavros’ abuser, but anybody can change. I know people who bullied other kids in school / people who used to be toxic, and as long as they have guilt and remorse over what they’ve done, I don’t super hold that against them. Many young teenagers stop over others to survive. It doesn’t make any of it right, and I was bullied and was never the bully like many others, and I don’t know if I could forgive Vriska if she was real, but her in-comic victims did, and I feel that’s much more important.

I can relate to her being a wlw and also from her being abused by her mother. You can dislike her if she reminds you of your abuser / your abuser liked her, but I’m an outsider to that, lol? I’m allowed to like her and defend her. Would you or anybody else take the time to tell a Gamzee, Eridan, or Bro stan why they’re irredeemable? I’d personally say to go ahead and do so (but especially for Bro stans) but I feel like men are allowed to like male abusers in fiction without a lot of the vitriol that women get when we like female (in this case, former) abusers. Like men can stan Eridan, Komaeda, J.D., Bakugou, Light Yagami, and other horrible men, but like when it comes to the few horrible women I see tons more hatred and more people arguing with the few women who like them? 

And like, for everything Vriska did, she did suffer for it. She died by the hands of her childhood best friend and became a ghost who was able to get genuine love and feel empathy that triggered her sorrow about what she’d done, which is a literal example that Vriska’s inner self and core isn’t evil, and that she can be a good person? and the hero that she’d always wanted to be? She’s not irredeemable.

[spnreactionblogging]

raising hell

SPOILERS BELOW 

okay I really learned my lesson last time about not typing this directly into tumblr so it's going into notepad first and then I'm pasting it over

I have angel's envy for the episode in general, which I will be drinking gradually as a special occasion just for S15 as it airs, and also devil's cut for this episode in particular because I hear buckleming wrote it and I'm toasting to crowley and drinking that one if/when something fucked up inevitably happens to kevin

I'm SO FUCKING GLAD to see osric in this btw just like. I love him he's so good I'm glad he's back

I've tried to avoid spoilers but from what glimpses I've seen before I could glance away it sounds like maybe some meta shit is getting into territory I was also going into with the kevin/crowley/castiel fic I'm doing? so super intrigued to see where that goes but also not getting my hopes up because I fear the writing is going to drop the ball

I love meta shit though I'm so here for it, I gotta double back for time travel shenanigans in Lebanon

okay anyway let's start

oh and apparently rob benedict had a stroke a while back?? and i'm so glad he's all right, here are the signs of a stroke if you need to refresh because you really ought to know what to look for https://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/09/03/too-young-to-have-a-stroke-think-again I had this open in a tab from someone totally different on twitter

I like the "road closed" sign we start with because it seems thematically on point for like... shutting down the infinite potential of stories as they are not done being told, and as all those doors close

it's not a buckleming episode unless it starts off with gratuitous violence against women

the amazon subtitles are spelling it "benzine" [sic] and it's pissing me off

I love jared playing sam playing an FBI agent who's nervous about delivering speeches

crams all this sam and cas footage into my mouth

I don't believe "belphegor" at all but I love seeing alex playing this part

this implication that belphegor has teamed up with a hunter previously.........

pretty impressed with these townspeople actually? their concerns are not unreasonable and they're right to be skeptical

pffffff at this parallel of sam addressing the living crowd vs jack the ripper addressing the ghost crowd

the makeup on the ghosts is pretty fuckin good, I like the wardrobe and hair too

I like the fake posters at the school for various fictional sporting events

castiel continues to have a conscience and I adore him

rowena "am I interrupting something juicy" eyes emoji

ruth is pretty fun, I like her necklace

I like that ketch literally has a gun that just kicks spirits out of people. like. ...why haven't they been using this technology the whole time. guess it's an endgame weapon.

hahahahha an attractive female demon named Ardat. ................me @ homestuck like oh Ardata got it

this is the first time i've seen adult amara? it's bizarre to see characters I've only heard of

dude's right to be very upset and worried about his neighbors and cas should tell them what's up honestly, I see sam's point about not inciting panic but on the other hand :\

no idea where this arthur/rowena thing is going except I do I guess

I really, really like castiel's take (which is also sam's take from the last episode) that even if their lives were written by chuck, their experiences still mattered, and are not rendered worthless because of external circumstances about how they came into being

are people seriously doing a "THIS IS A DESTIEL MOMENT" from this? like. i guess.

also i hate that cas is having to apologize for "dropping the puck". he didn't. fuck off. he didn't drop the ball. dean didn't give a shit about felix being killed anyway so what the fuck.

misha and jensen both have excellent delivery though

I do like seeing dean play off ketch and belphegor and rowena, it's a nice change of pace

dude these stunts of getting thrown into a wall or a shelving unit like I realize they're stunts but OUCH

ahhhhhh that's kevin i hear osric's voice

kevin got the other ghost to go away by yelling at them lmaooooo I love him so fucking much!!!!!

so we're gonna retcon that kevin has spent the last what, four??? four fucking years? not in heaven, but in hell or purgatory or just wandering earth? remember how a year on earth is forty years in hell?

I'm glad I specifically have the devil's cut to drink to kevin getting fucked over because I'm already enraged

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 1 **

god he's been on the screen for less than sixty seconds and he was just never sent to heaven because god lied, I'm so glad I have bourbon for this. fucking buckleming, how do they keep getting put in charge of kevin episodes

I got up to get my kevin keychain to watch the rest of this episode with I'm so mad holy fuck I'm so mad, it just never stops

the amazon subtitles: "the vegetables and herbs are finely chopped and added to a SEXY pastiche of fragrant tripe"

thinking emoji, did you mean zesty....

I took like a 30 minute break because I was so mad just now about kevin being denied access to heaven like fuck you

the break was so long that amazon timed out, goddamn it

oh so we can't get kevin into heaven because god's not around to make an exception and god hates the winchesters and how god feels about the winchesters extends to their surrounding "friends" and family. amazing. this is bullshit.

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 2 **

"whiny kevin tran! typical millennial." he should whine more. he has every right to be furious

also amazing that bobby and john manage to stay in heaven, and chuck didn't cast them down to hell along with mary out of spite when this all went down? so like... why not kevin. AMAZING!!!!!!

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 3 **

sam has the dignity to actually look concerned instead of just annoyed

oh I like sam being linked to chuck lmaooooo

I do love this shot of a bunch of ghosts just hanging out in some suburban kitchen.

osric is so handsome I'm so glad to see him on this again

"you know how the hellspawn are, all they talk about is sam and dean, sam and dean" maybe the only time jack the ripper has been right about anything

not a fan of this extremely heteronormative bullshit courtesy of buckleming

also left-brain/right-brain is basically a lie isn't it

this fucking music. I'm so sick of buckleming

like I would be fine with this if it had been written by literally anyone else but this is the worst shit, nobody flirts like this

the road is "FAIR WYND", that's the cousin of zack fair and cid highwind

she hooked up with jack the ripper briefly? weird flex but okay

oh kevin is now being held GHOST HOSTAGE because dean told him to go do some reconnaissance

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 4 **

also I paused on a screenshot that's extremely funny to me

oh I don't like hearing kevin screaming :(

drinking for kevin being tortured by jack the ripper trying to ghost-vore him

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 5 **

I'm also waiting for the ghostbusters containment thing to backfire and swallow him too

DEAN: you can see them, how many are there "BELPHEGOR": 100 at least, more keep coming

convenient way not to animate 100+ ghosts

oh ketch took off the fucking iron, or maybe it fell off when he was hurt?

good job rowena for real

CASTIEL: I tried to heal him, but it didn't work. I don't know why. SAM: You're probably just tired, Cas. We all are.

for fucking real the biggest sastiel mood is taking naps

also this is troubling

it's like legitimately weird to see them call an ambulance on this show? I guess since they're posing as FBI agents it's more feasilble but

SAM: I'm sorry, Kevin. I wish there was some way to make this right. KEVIN: Me too, but there isn't. And sometimes you just gotta accept that.

actually fuck you lmao holy shiiiiiiiiiiiit omg fuck this

I'm about to drink the rest of the kevin-designated devil's cut

"there's nothing to keep him tied to earth, he'll go crazy!"

hey what about y'know

his mom...........................................

I'm screaming

"I love you guys" osric I know you love them IRL but this is so unfair for kevin the character

I like alexander and osric in the same shot, that's kind of fun, I enjoyed their panel I watched

and there's him waving goodbye. this is so unfair. time to down the rest of this

** "DRINK FOR KEVIN" COUNT: 666 **

to kevin, and to osric

thank fuck I was already in the middle of writing fix-it fic, this is injust

I have such mixed feelings because I'm so happy to see osric back but like AT WHAT COST, the worst timeline

there's a finality to this too like he's not coming back after this unless there's massive all-cast-reunion episode at the tail end in a paradise party AU but I doubt it

goodbye Kevin, this sucks :(

I'm more motivated than ever to finish this fic

"Even on your best day, you couldn't force my hand." is a pretty good line

also negative space is not inferior or "backup vocals"? it's part of a composition

you fucking know what buckleming is that WE CAN FIGURE OUT THAT THERE'S A NARRATIVE PARALLEL ABOUT HER LEAVING HIM TRAPPED WITH HIS CREATION, WITHOUT YOU SPELLING IT OUT jesus christ

bluhhhhhhhhhh I liked the premiere a lot more

[mailmom]

20!

*AGGRESIVELY BANGS ON TABLE* Time for the story, dont get mad at me, followers.

We were waiting for the panel to begin. A jack noir fucking cosplayer struts down the isle like some sort of runway model, and i panic because yes, a jack, my enemy, is coming towards me. So naturally i snap this ugly ass photo, and continue on with my day, not so quietly ranting to my friends about it.

We waited... but the panelists never showed up, so some people in the crowd took over. I have no video of this, but i was apart of it, and next to me was my buddy Rae, who was cosplaying Jane, 

and on the other side was someone I didnt know. But they were a Jack Noir, and of course everyone loved them. So i tried not being shy and pretend fighted them on stage, and it got goofy after a while, but i didnt want to embarrass myself.

I never knew who they were. Also during this panel, i finally found someone to give my equius letter to. I ran down and handed it to them and they excitedly said thank you. And gave me a tootsie roll. Again, I didnt know this person. At the gathering, a cosplay (i believe she was porrim during this one but i cant remember fuck) Approached me and told me she was the jack cosplayer and that her friend was excited to see me. So I have her 2 letters and headed back to the front to wait for carrapaces to get called. After that was finished, i was lowkey disappointed there was no mayor, but just then one came down the steps!

And youve seen the photos, everyone was telling us to go up there and take pictures, and i was freaking out.

Turns out, these two are best friends and they became my friends, and it feels weird because ever since that con ive kind of idolized them a lot. And even though they arent into homestuck as much as they were before, I still freaking love them??

Oh hey, guess whos good pals with jake from state farm ^^

(theyre a really cool dude)

After that day, I was always known as the pm cosplayer, and every sac anime i made sure to hand out letters just so i can see who else i can become friends with.

THATS THE STORY OF HOW I MET MY IDOLS AND HOW I GOT INTO A PANEL MY FIRST TIME AT SAC ANIME.

[a-panda-reads-act-omega]

ACT OMEGA PART 22

THE 03/17/17 UPDATE

HERE WE GO, finally an update with a BUNCH of pages for me to comment about. Page 115-126, how exciting. God I need to get better with intro’s I’m sorry.

Heh, I like how everybody’s emotions are clear as day here. Anyways, nobody new’s here which makes me hope that this cast of characters will continue to interact and mingle.

W o ah there, calm yourself Vriska. She’s not lookin pleased with Tavvy over there. Also, I love how this is literally the exact same panel other than Vriska.

VRISKA: Wh8t?! VRISKA: The hell are all of you st8ring at???????? MEENAH: 38/

WHAT? IT’S PERFECTLY NORMAL TO PASS OUT DURING A LIFE-THREATENING BATTLE AGAINST AN UNKILLABLE GOD.

Fish gills changed a bit. This animation is also g re a t. I could literally watch Vriska just dust herself off for hours. God that sounded creepy. Fefefri is seeminnnn a lil taken aback here. And Meenah is real disappointed. Or just looking away to please Vriska, which would be cute but is probably not the case.

I love how not good Vriska is at recovering from embarrassing moments.

Oooohhh shit. Le’s behind the Juju im guessing, but that green hole is gettin closer and closer. They might need to start getting out of here soon.

VRISKA: What the hell just HAPPENED?

Homestuck happened.  And you passed out.

Tavros raising his hand like a student. He would totally be the kind of student the teacher always has to pander to, even though the rest of the class is tired of hearing the same thing explained over and over.

TAVROS: dO YOU MEAN, tHE EXPLOSION,,,? TAVROS: oR,,, TAVROS: WAS IT AN ATTACK? TAVROS: iT WAS HARD TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE, TAVROS: sO MAYBE IT DOESN’T MATTER,,,

Was that explosion he’s talking about just the LE mouth blast? I think it’s an attack Tavros. Less of an explosion than it was a beam with boomy results.

VRISKA: Tavros, stop. VRISKA: Just, stop. Right now. I’m already twice over the limit of how much 8ullshit I can take in one day, and your irrit8ing voice is THIS close to giving me a head8che. TAVROS: uHHH,,,? VRISKA: Nope, too l8. Migr8ne city, popul8tion: me! Thanks a 8uttload, 8oy skylark. TAVROS: i,,,iM,,,sORRY,,,? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < yeah sorry about your head vwhiskers but i gotta interject here DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < furst off your head hurts beclaws it got hit with a deadly fuckin laser pointer

Hahah. Get it? Laser pointer. Because. CAT. And also, holy shit Vriska got HIT with that?? Or was it just an explosion thingy FROM the laser pointer that knocked her out.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so blaming it on tavros f33ls purrty damn rude to me tbh DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < but i dont really wanna get into a catfight with you right now DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < or maybe not ever cause thats just like NOPE no thanks

You’re the best Davepeta. Almost as great as Vriska.

DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < cranky vriska? ill pass on that DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < especially since there are like DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < way more important things to be dealing with! DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < so ill let it slide fur now B33 DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < as you were saying tavros?

So can Davepeta just be Tavros’ wingman? Because holy shit that’d be great. Actually, could this be the beginning of a beautiful PALE ROMANCE?? Probably not because ARquius is totally their soulmate.

TAVROS: wELL,,, tHANK YOU, fOR SPEAKING ON MY BEHALF, eVEN IF IT WASN’T STRICTLY NECESSARY,

It was necessary tavros.

TAVROS: uHHHH,,,

My point exactly.

TAVROS: bIRD NEPETA? TAVROS: oR, wHOEVER YOU ARE, DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < youre half right! DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < its davepeta TAVROS: oH, TAVROS: oKAY, TAVROS: sO,,,dAVEPETA,,, TAVROS: dO YOU THINK IT WAS AN ATTACK OR AN EXPLOSION? DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < tavros DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < are you holding onto your socks because im about to blow them the fuck off DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < i think it was an attack DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < that was ALSO an explosion DAVEPETASPRITE^2: B33 < >B33 TAVROS: }:o

:o MAN, Davepeta you need to chill! I have to go get dressed now, because you just blew my entire OUTFIT off! from shirt to shorts, nothing could withstan the sheer FORCE of your shocking observation.

VRISKA: UGH!!!!!!!!

Shut up Vriska.

Oh. We also got a Porrim back there. And, I guess that’s just Kankri? Maybe the same one, maybe a different? Vriska needs to chill though.

VRISKA: I don’t have TIME for this! VRISKA: Who gives a shit if it was an att8ck or WH8TEVER!!!!!!!! VRISKA: Am I the really only person who c8res about m8king sure the most evil fucker in all of paradox space is FINALLY DE8D FOR GOOD?!?!?!?! VRISKA: Isn’t that what we r8sed an entire army for?? VRISKA: The army that is NOWH8RE TO 8E FOUND, 8Y THE W8Y!!!!!!!!

I think they’re all d e a d Vriska. And you’re assuming way too much of this group of NINCOMPOOPS. They literally are just doing whatever.

MEENAH: vriska VRISKA: WH8T!!!!!!!! MEENAH: you need to krill out for a sec

Exactly. Krill out girl.

VRISKA: NO, *YOU* “KRILL OUT”!!!!!!!! VRISKA: I AM N8T GOING TO KRILL IN A SINGLE FUCKING DIRECTION UNTIL SOME8ODY DECIDES TO OPEN THEIR MOUTH AND FILL ME IN ON WH8T THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED!!!!!!!! MEENAH: the armys gone

Yup. Everybody fucking died via death laser.

FFS CHILL Vriska.

VRISKA: GONE?! VRISKA: No SHIT, they’re GONE! VRISKA: Do YOU see a throng of expenda8le, huddled masses anywh8re near8y, Meenah?? 8ecause if so, NOW WOULD 8E A GR8 TIME TO LET ME KNOW! MEENAH: ...

Calm down Vriska, before you push away the people that AREN’T dead. I mean, who know’s if these guys even care enough to keep working for you anyways. I’d say Meenah’s the last person you should be yelling at.

VRISKA: No?? That’s what I fucking THOUGHT. VRISKA: Th8nk you SO much for that astute o8serv8tion! VRISKA: That sure clears up JACK SQU8T! VRISKA: Now how a8out we get 8ack to the LESS immedi8tly o8vious! VRISKA: Gone WHERE? And more importantly, WHY! MEENAH: listen serks i could really do without the attitide MEENAH: if you took two seconds to breathe you could prolly figure it out yourself MEENAH: but if itll help you clam down...

Exactly, Clam down Vriska. Because it doesn’t take a goddamn genius to figure out they’re all dead.

VRISKA: It DEFIN8TELY will. So spill!!!!!!!! MEENAH: they got blasted VRISKA: Are you serious? VRISKA: He took out EVERYONE? In one hit?! MEENAH: nah not all of em MEENAH: but a lotta double death happened yeah MEENAH: i mean the weapon didnt do flip of what it was SUPPOS-ED to do as far as i could tell MEENAH: it did a pretty good job of sheildin our asses MEENAH: (youre whalecome btw)

Meenah, you’re the true hero here. I mean a calm troll who’s powerful, smart, and only sometimes out of order? I’d say that’s the best kinda troll we can get.

MEENAH: but anybody who didnt get behind it MEENAH: definitely got fried VRISKA: So? Where’s Lord English now?? VRISKA: 8ecause if we need to track him down, we need to get on that like, yesterday!

He isn’t still there? I thought he’d just be doing some angry lord english stuff. Hopefully he isn’t causing too much trouble.......

MEENAH: uh MEENAH: dudes still havin a tantrum over there actually

Oh. I was r i g h t .

VRISKA: Then why the hell are we all the w8y out here?! MEENAH: look vriska MEENAH: the plan didnt work MEENAH: you got KOd or passed out or whatever the shell MEENAH: and the army got gutted MEENAH: so i figured the only sensible fin to do was a tactical retreat VRISKA: Okay, fine. That WAS pretty sensi8le. MEENAH: except MEENAH: most of everyone didnt STOP retreatin MEENAH: no matter what inspirational crab i threw at them VRISKA: .......

Oh.

Oh.

so there WERE more survivors, but the most’ve them just bailed on the scene. Damn. Well, who can blame them? Double death isn’t for everyone I suppose.

Well ARADIA sure seems happy :D

MEENAH: sorry aboat your head by the way MEENAH: ill admit that was my bad MEENAH: aint easy to haul ass in sand with dead weight over your shoulder

To the people behind ACT OMEGA: You better get me a gif of Meenah dragging Vriska face down through the sand.

ARADIA: hey! ARADIA: at least theres a bright side to all this

Of COURSE there is AA.

Awe. This team charge hug is actually kinda precious. Tavros’ little smile, and Aradia’s “appreciate him!” look.

ARADIA: tavros convinced a few people to stay ARADIA: right? :D

Oh, well that’s good then! So far, I know we have... Tavros, Aradia, Sollux, Kankri, Porrim, Mituna, Feferi, Latula, Vriska, Meenah, Davepeta, and possibly more.

TAVROS: i DID, TAVROS: tHROUGH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP,

TAVROS: aND A LARGE QUANTITY OF WORDS, sPOKEN DIRECTLY FROM THE HEART, TAVROS: eVEN THOUGH IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER IF ALL OF THEM HAD STAYED, i THINK, TAVROS: tHERE IS A PART OF ME THAT ALSO THOUGHT LEAVING MIGHT HAVE BEEN A GOOD IDEA,,, TAVROS: cONSIDERING, hOW THINGS LOOK PRETTY HOPELESS NOW, TAVROS: bUT THAT PART OF ME IS THE ONE THAT MISSED OUT ON THE COMPLETION, oF MY SUCCESSFUL AND FULFILLING CHARACTER ARC,

He get’s so cocky sometimes, but it’s the kind of cocky where he’s nervous he’s not looking cocky in the right way. What the hell am I typing. I just love how self aware he is.

TAVROS: wHICH IS WHAT THE MAJORITY OF THE REST OF ME IS COMPRISED OF, TAVROS: eSPECIALLY THE PARTS THAT WERE KICKING LORD ENGLISH IN THE FACE, nOT TOO LONG AGO, TAVROS: aND TRUTHFULLY, i AM STILL PRETTY FIRED UP, fROM THAT, TAVROS: sO I IGNORED THE COWARDLY IMPULSE, aND INSTEAD STAYED TO HELP MY FRIENDS, sEE THIS UNDERTAKING THROUGH TO THE END, TAVROS: aND THERE WERE SOME PEOPLE, wHO AGREED WITH ME, TAVROS: wHICH ARE THE PEOPLE WHO ARE HERE, pRESENTLY,

Goddammit, these people aren’t the brightest. They had to have stayed with him out of pity. If all of your friends are running away, and the only person asking you to stay and fight an unkillable demon was T A V R O S .

You’d run.

Sollux doesn’t wanna be here.

ARADIA: see? sollux and i even stayed to help too ARADIA: in fact were all here to help ARADIA: well maybe some of us are here mostly out of curiosity SOLLUX: 0r b0red0m.

Or pity. Or self-hate. Or a deathwish.

ARADIA: or that too! or maybe even a mishmash of all sorts of motivations ARADIA: but whatever the reason we are on your side ARADIA: so i get the feeling if you dont lighten up a little ARADIA: some of us might suddenly have a lot more of a reason to join the others ARADIA: and find something else to do

Nice way of putting it Aradia. Vriska really needs to Clam down and Krill out, because she’s gonna lose the few she has with her still.

OH SHIT THAT’S THE END OF THE UPDATE. Well then, that’d be my cue to sleep. it’s 2:15 AM an I have summerschool in 5 hours. gnight folks. 

[thewebcomicsreview]

Hi, i'm making a homestuck au comic. Could you give me any advice ? I love your reviews, they're very interesting, even of the comics i didn't knew !

Thanks! 

I’m not sure what kind of general purpose “advice” I can give, tbh, but....

1. Try to avoid my friends, who beat me up with steel pipes at 6:30am every single day for liking Homestuck. It’s what I deserve, of course, and it saves me a lot of money on alarm clocks, but you’re younger than I am and can still improve yourself.

2. Have fun! This is your fanfic AU comic, and while we all want to make the best comic we can and get super popular and be the next Vast Error and somehow end up partially controlling the original IP, what’s most important is that we enjoy what we do enough to want to keep doing it. This is the most important rule, and it over-rides the other ones. 

3. Try and break your comic up into smaller stories with a beginning, middle, and end. That way, if you feel like you’ve made a bunch of bad creative decisions you don’t like, you’re not married to them. You don’t have to literally divide the story into clearly labeled episodes like I do in my comics, but something like “this is the story of how Doonot Steele enters the AU troll session” or breaking it down further into “This is how Doonot solves the entry item puzzle” (remember those? The kind of got dropped as a concept but it was neat) as a mental model. Then you have a goal that the story’s moving towards and reaches in comparatively short order, which helps with story momentum and not drawing 200 panels and then wondering where the fuck your story went and getting discouraged. And it doesn’t have to be plot mechanics, whatever you want to happen in your story, dividing it into chunks is helpful. Leave the “fifty seemingly unrelated plots appear to go nowhere and then suddenly come together in a climax” shtick to Paranatural, at least until you’ve done some comics and are feeling confident (which maybe you have and are, this advice is generalized and is not a bible written in stone terms and conditions apply offer not valid in Missouri etc)

4. If you don’t feel like you can do something, try to do it anyway. You read Homestuck when you were a pre-teen, so I presume you’re well under thirty at the moment. This comic probably isn’t your magnum opus that’ll get you in the Sistine Chapel next to Einstein, and that’s fine! Lean into it! Experiment! Take risks! Fail! Both in your art and your writing, embrace the idea that it doesn’t actually matter all that much if it’s bad or not. You’ll learn a lot more from experimental failure that milquetoast success, and honestly a bad comic that tries things is better than a bland comic that’s okay (as Homestuck itself proves). Don’t ever be afraid to do something because you think it’ll turn out bad and no one will like it. I’m under no illusions that this looks amazing, but I’m a little bit better of an artist for having at least tried.

....

That’s it, really! Try and break your comic into manageable chunks, don’t be afraid to take risks, have fun, and avoid getting viciously beaten with steel pipes. All the advice an aspiring comic creator really needs, IMO.