#besides like ff they are perfect actually

[chloesimaginationthings]

I like your genderbends of jojo male characters, but have you done any gender bends for female characters?

I have! These are old though, and I want to update them

[serverusslaype]

Shameless, pt. 11

Severus Snape x professor!reader fic

Shameless Masterpost

guys im running out of gifs to use ffs

despite that, HELLO!! i am more than 100% certain that you adorable feral little cretins are going to love this chapter holy fk. like i'm actually so excited to see your reactions/comments LOLL

i apologise for the long, long wait, however i wanted to perfect this part, it was really important that i did, otherwise it would be a waste, and kind of cringe. i won't keep you any longer <3

thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy this!! and again, thank you soooo much for all your replies and reblogs and likes they just make me smile all the time, i really cannot believe that people like this, i'm still flabbergasted.

warnings: 18+ further down, minors DNI after the big red *'s. i also put a sign to say where it ends if you're not comfortable reading such things!

if i was any good at coding i'd cover it up, you know how people do on discord, like that spoiler thing. but alas, i am but a technophobe.

(this song is very important during that certain scene so if you will, please listen to it as you read <;3)

onwards and upwards...

Severus stood beside Dumbledore, his hands hanging at his sides, fingers fidgeting thoughtfully at the seams of his his black slacks. Before he was able to speak a reply to the Headmaster, a voice he had hoped he'd never hear again pierced the blanketed silence in the Great Hall. For a moment, both his heart and stomach dropped as he turned his head toward the irritating voice, jaw clenching almost immediately.

"Y/N!" None other than Benjamin Bluewater had called out, his ridiculously well-groomed hair bouncing as he jogged towards you. Severus felt a burning blaze of rage prickle his skin as his eyes observed how Bluewater embraced your rigid form, clearly in shock at his sudden appearance. What the hell was he doing here?

"Ben-" Severus heard you gasp as Bluewater pulled away from you, his hands flying up to cradle your cheeks intimately. Something Severus had done less than an hour ago. The jealousy that was raging inside of Snape was lethal, and he was desperately fighting the urge to rip you from Bluewater's slimy grasp and tuck you within the safe haven of his arms.

Your fearful eyes met Snape's icy ones, setting a kaleidoscope of butterflies free in his stomach. He could tell you were quietly begging him for help, however, he refused to get involved. The last thing he wanted to do was seem suspicious and perhaps trigger an unnecessary reaction from Bluewater. Snape remembered how volatile the boy could be, he served enough detentions with him. In fact, that was one thing that Severus was worried about. He wasn't sure if you knew about his bad temper.

"Are you alright? I came at once when I heard about Black getting into Hogwarts." Bluewater said, his overly-concerned voice dripping with worry. Something didn't sit right with Severus as he watched the two of you. Why didn't Bluewater visit when you had been attacked by a dementor? How does that not warrant a visit but this does? A deep, frustrated sigh left Snape's nose as Ben's thumbs brushed against the apples of your cheeks. Your hands reluctantly rose to sit atop of his forearms, silently soothing his worries.

"Wha-what are you... how...?" You stuttered, cheeks ablaze. You had to take a moment to compose yourself, and it didn't help that Severus's fiery eyes were burning holes into you. Inhaling slowly, you spoke again. "What are you doing here? How did you even get in?"

"Well, it helps when you work at the Ministry of Magic," Bluewater shrugged, a proud, smug smirk teasing his lips. His hands fell from your cheeks and settled on your waist, squeezing you a tad. You tensed up again as you glanced at Severus, your heart going a million miles an hour. Bluewater frowned as he followed your eyes, a flash of surprise crossing his features as he finally noticed the two of you weren't alone. "Erm... Headmaster, Professor... Snape." He greeted awkwardly, offering a nod. Snape wasn't keen on acknowledging him, however, Dumbledore kept it polite, smiling at the boy.

"A lovely surprise, Mr Bluewater." Dumbledore said. It had sounded sarcastic, but that was unintentional.

Severus stared at Bluewater with cold eyes, his gaze slowly falling to where his hands sat comfortably on your waist, taunting him. His mouth twitched bitterly. "How you've grown, Mr Bluewater," Snape commented slyly, his sharp eyes flicking back up to meet Bluewater's. "It feels like only yesterday you were causing chaos here at Hogwarts. More specifically in my classroom." He drawled, eyes narrowing in contempt.

An incredulous huff slipped from Bluewater's nose and a sarcastic grin broke out on his face; his grip on your waist tightening. The jealous fire in Severus exploded. Clearly, there was unresolved conflict between these two.

"I see you've remained the same, Snape." He quipped sharply, tongue like a sword. Severus turned his back to you and Bluewater, his shoulders stiffening as he muttered something to Dumbledore.

There was an awkward silence that fell upon the four of you.

You turned to Ben, keeping your voice low. "Look, I think it's best if you leave." You muttered, an uncomfortable expression slipping onto your face. You nibbled on your bottom lip.

"I'm not leaving until I know where Black is, I need to keep you safe." Ben laughed dryly, his eyes narrowing at you in disbelief. Oh no, no-no-no. He had to leave, there was no way he could stay.

"I'm perfectly safe here," you attempted to reassure him, "I'm surrounded by some of the most talented witches and wizards to ever exist, Ben." An incredulous chuckle fell from your lips as you spoke, a little surprised that he deemed Hogwarts unsafe. How could it be unsafe when Dumbledore was here? Despite that, you couldn't risk him noticing the tension between you and Snape, it wouldn't look good on either of you.

He looked at you with a stiff expression, his gaze flicking to where Snape and Dumbledore stood, eyes hardening as he stared. You glanced away awkwardly.

"I'll stay here until I deem it so, Y/N." Ben said rather sternly, making your brows shoot up in shock. Since when was he like this? This was not the Ben you knew.

"Sorry?" You choked.

"The Ministry gets the final say, irregardless of what you or Hogwarts thinks." Ben tilted his head at you as he stared down at you. "I'm staying." His serious tone of voice made you back down and nod, your lips pursed. There was nothing you could say or do to change his mind.

Shit.

Shit, indeed.

Two knocks sounded at Snape's door, and he audibly sighed, a little vexed that someone had chosen to come and bother him when he'd just settled down - his raging jealousy had finally subdided after two hours of brooding in his office.

"Come in." Snape grunted from his desk, piles of parchment and books surrounding him messily. Usually he was neat, organised - but tonight was rather exasperating. He just about managed to watch another man with his hands all over you.

"Severus," Minerva McGonagall's voice made Snape's head snap up, a startled look adopting his features. He definitely was not expecting the Head of Gryffindor House to be knocking at his door. "I'm sorry to impede, however, I wanted to chat with you. Regarding Y/N." She sighed, her wrinkled lips pouting. His body suddenly felt heavier.

"What about Professor L/N?" Severus asked curtly, looking back down at the pile of assignments in front of him like he had no interest in the subject.

"I wasn't born yesterday, Severus," Minerva said, a stern look taking hold of her face. Snape's jaw ticked, his fingers stiffening in irritation. He sighed and glanced back up at the older witch, waiting for her to continue her lecture. "You need to be careful. She's just a girl." She said softly and stepped forwards a tad, linking her fingers together in front. Why was he getting lectured when he's been the one trying to push you away? Well, he was. Now, all he wanted to do was pull you close to him.

"This is no concern of yours,  Minerva." Severus's brows furrowed harshly, his voice clipped and cold. Minerva's eyes narrowed; his tone rubbing her the wrong way.

"It concerns me when it starts to affect my colleagues." Minerva retorted, her patience wearing thin. She knew this was going to be a hard conversation, especially with someone like Severus. "I just want you to consider things before you cross that line, Severus. This isn't... wise."

It isn't wise? Well, who would've thought that? Not me, apparently, Severus growled in his mind, sighing heavily through his nostrils as he stared at Minerva.

"You think I don't know that?" Severus groaned, shutting his eyes as he reached up to massage his temples. He felt a headache coming on; all this stress wasn't good for him.

There was several seconds of quiet before Minerva spoke again, voice soft. "Do you care for her?"

He kept silent once again.

Minerva felt for Severus, she knew what it was like to care for someone and to have to push them away. In fact, it felt horribly and hauntingly familiar. This was like a walk down memory lane for her. Her head tilted slightly, her eyes softening as she stared at the Potions Master who had his eyes glued to his desk, palms splayed out atop of it as he intensely read through an essay. "I do not want your pity, Minerva," Severus hissed, his head snapping up, a face full of anger, "I have walked down this road before, and I know how it ends. So please, save your sorry for someone else."

Minerva was so used to Snape's flick-of-a-switch emotions that she hardly flinched at his sudden outburst. "Alright." A soft sigh left her as she glanced away from him, her fingers flexing. There was nothing left to say, she knew that Severus knew the risks with you. And you knew the risks with him. For now, she could only let things play out, she wasn't going to play God. If the two of you wanted to do it, who was she to stop it?

"I have a lot of work to complete." Severus grunted, his shoulders hunching up as he sat closer to his desk, burying his nose further into the parchment. Minerva exhaled softly through her nostrils and her lips pouted together again. She blinked, turning around to leave.

As her fingers grasped the rickety door handle, she looked over her shoulder at Snape. "Should you and Y/N choose to take such a risk, Severus," she began, earning another exhausted sigh from him, "don't break her heart. She doesn't deserve to go through that pain. Not at such a young age."

Severus's eyes faltered a tad as he glazed over the messy handwriting laced upon the parchment sat in front of him, as if it were goading him. His breath hitched slightly at her words. Minerva had a point. A very, irritatingly valid point. Severus cared for you - a lot. However, now he found himself questioning whether it was enough - whether he was enough for you. He couldn't pour his whole self into a relationship with you if it wasn't that - his whole self. Were you better off with Bluewater? He could probably treat you better than Severus ever could. Bluewater was young, handsome, somewhat smart... he also had a very good job at the Ministry... Severus was but a teacher, and he was old. Why would you ever settle for someone like him when a boy like Bluewater existed?

The click of his door told him that Minerva had left. Severus buried his face in his hands, his heart twisting and knotting itself as it yearned for you.

Rolling over in your bed, your unwearied eyes skimmed your darkened room, landing on the clock that was hung on the wall. Almost eleven o'clock at night. Ben stirred beside you, the bed creaking and groaning as he shuffled to right, away from you, burying his cheek in the pillow. You glanced at him and sighed, your mind wandering to the thought of Severus. You wondered what he was doing right now. Was he awake or asleep? No, he was definitely awake, that man never slept.

Severus.

Gods, you adored that man. You weren't exactly sure what it was that drew you to him, but perhaps it was just his aura; it was so dark, mysterious. The way the two of you bantered so easily, the conversation flowed like a river and it felt natural, whereas, with Ben... it was... well, it just felt artificial - forced, almost. It wasn't a secret that the chemistry and tension between you and Severus was incredibly palpable - even Minerva had noticed, and suddenly that made you panic - what if Ben notices? Other teachers? The students had even noticed last year when Severus had helped you up the steps when duelling Lockhart. He won't notice, will he? No, he won't be here long enough to.

Hopefully.

You rolled over in your bed again and noticed that Ben had turned back towards you, so the two of you were face to face now. You tucked your hands up and underneath your chin, allowing yourself to stare at his features in the dark. As you laid there, staring, breathing soft and slow, your heart skipped a beat as he shifted slightly; the shadow that was cast against his face suddenly transforming him intosomeone else. Suddenly, he'd grown long, obisidian black hair that framed his face perfectly, his basic nose had become hooked and prominent, his cheekbones turned more defined.

You sucked in a sharp, yet soft breath - careful to keep quiet so you didn't wake Ben - your skin prickling with goosebumps. Was this how hung up you were on Severus? So much so that if you stared too long at someone, they'd turn into him?

Your hand slowly rose to drag itself against your face. Glancing at the clock again, you knew you weren't falling asleep any time soon. You'd been laid there for at least two or so hours, tossing and turning, begging for your brain to shut off so you could perhaps get some sort of shut-eye. So, you chose to get out of bed. Flipping open the duvet, the biting cold of your room enveloped you; a chill shooting down your figure. You shivered slightly as you sat up and twisted yourself on your bum so your legs hung down over the side of the bed. It creaked slightly as you leant forwards to put your slippers on, prompting you to quickly glance behind you to check if it woke Ben - thankfully, it didn't. With a quick exhale of relief, you spun stepped out of bed and padded quietly over to your sofa where your favourite comfy, deep green cardigan was resting over the arm of it.

You picked it up and slipped it on, wrapping the warm, soft and cosy garment around yourself. Headed towards your door, you threw once last look at Ben and clicked open your door, shutting it calmly, making your way down to the one place you only wanted to go at this time of night.

The mossy, damp smell of the dungeons invaded your nostrils angrily, almost making you cough. You forgot how bad the smell could get down here during the autumn and winter months. The cool chill seeped through your wool cardigan, making you pull it tighter against your frame, hurriedly trying to keep every bit of warmth around you before it escaped.

As you neared that certain door, you lingered by it, raising your knuckles hesitantly.

With a stern sigh, you knocked, and awaited his usual grunt of acknowledgement.

"Come in." Came an annoyed tone from the inside just as you expected. You bit the inside of your cheek as you creaked open the door and slipped inside.

"Erm, hi," You squeaked out, closing the door shut behind you and pressing your back against it, staring awkwardly at Severus, who was still sat behind his desk, head down. "What are you doing up so late?" The sound of your voice made him look up, his brows furrowed in confusion.

"I could ask you the same thing, Miss L/N," Severus mused. You couldn't help but smile coyly at him, padding forwards to move closer, your skin tingling with anticipation. "So, what brings you here?" Severus asked, his voice curious, yet there was also a hint of coldness to it. You assumed it was because he was tired - or at least hoped it was that.

"I couldn't sleep." You hummed, folding your arms against your body, the silk skirt of your yellow nightdress shimmering in the low, amber light. Severus found himself glimpsing down at your garment; the sheen of the smooth, rich fabric catching his attention. Your cheeks suddenly simmered from the way his eyes glazed over you.

He looked back up at you. "So, you chose to bother me instead?" Severus quirked a brow.

"Precisely." You smiled bashfully, a quiet laugh slipping from your mouth as you rocked back and forth on your heels, your eyes leaving his to glance nervously around his gloomy classroom.

"How lucky I am." He said sarcastically, leaning back in his chair. Your smile stayed on your face as you rolled your eyes, stomach flipping at his voice.

"It feels weird that almost a year ago, we were in here, brewing that Mandrake potion together." You commented as your eyes fell on the exact desk the two of you had stood at.

Severus's eyes followed yours. "Indeed," he spoke, gazing back at you as you were distracted, taking a moment to admire you. His heart skipped a beat as the corners of your lips quirked upwards into another sheepish smile. Though, he soon felt indifferent to it as the thought of Bluewater slipped into his mind. "That was also the time we spoke about... your friend." Severus added, tutting at the end as if he had to force himself to spit that word out.

"Oh, right, yeah," you said awkwardly, clearing your throat, "you two still seem to absolutely despise each other." You looked at Severus, a rush of butterflies surging through you as you found his inquisitive eyes already glued to you.

Severus only grunted in response, clearly unwilling to talk about Ben. His body stiffened and his eyes had hardened. "Who would have thought that he'd come back to haunt me later on." He huffed, voice soaked in sarcasm. You had to force yourself to keep a straight face, unsure of how he'd react if a smile broke out on your face. You didn't exactly want to get into an argument right now. "I was foolish to think that he'd had enough causing me grief every single period that we shared."

"He was just a boy back then." An amused hum left your lips, though Severus didn't share the same outlook. His face had become stony again, unfeeling.

"He is still a boy now." Severus spat, like the idea of Ben was poison in his mouth. "He's young, barely twenty-three. He has a lot to learn."

"Am I just a girl to you, then?" You tilted your head at Severus, a tiny smile picking at the corner of your lips. You were twenty-two, almost twenty-three - a whole lot younger than Severus.

He stayed silent for a moment, staring at you, studying your gleeful little face. You suddenly felt a little vulnerable and so you averted your eyes to the ground, your face hot and embarrassed.

"Far from it." He sighed, eyes still glued on you. No, you were so much more to him than you could imagine. He couldn't tell you that though. Not when you had a chance at true happiness with someone that suited you better than an old, ugly git such as himself. "You're a grown woman, you've proven that." His reply had you shocked. You were not expecting such a response, in fact, you were actually expecting a dig, or even a petty insult. Your stomach felt a little heavier as you frowned at him, your eyes gently and slowly dissecting his worn features.

"Oh?" Your voice slipped up an octave as you were caught a little off-guard. "What, err, makes you say that?"

"I don't think I need to explain my reasoning. You're an intelligent woman, no need to spoon-feed you." Severus said simply with a slow blink, his glittering black eyes staring into yours, prompting your cheeks to burn even hotter. You forgot how beautifully hypnotising those two pools of inky-black were as you stared into them, almost losing yourself again.

"It feels weird to hear you compliment me." A gentle laugh left your lips. Severus's own lips tugged upwards slightly, the smallest hint of a smile appearing on his usually-cold face. A comfortable, yet partially awkward silence hung in the air for a moment. You stepped forwards once more, shuffling closer to Severus's desk, almost a foot away from him now. You looked down at the piles of assignments in front of him, curious. "May I?" You asked quietly, gesturing to them. He nodded.

You picked one up and began to read.

'Amortentia is the strongest known love potion in the world. Amor is a Latin word meaning ''Love'', it is also the name of the Roman goddess of love. ''Tentia'' is the Latin for ''held''. It makes the drinker become infatuated and obsessed.'

"I remember this," you smiled, eyes still glued to the parchment, "fourth years, correct?" You looked back to Severus, who was currently staring at you with such soft eyes that you almost melted right on the spot. You had to clear your throat to attempt to compose yourself, though it was truly in vain. It hadn't helped.

"Correct." He muttered, still staring at you, inducing a shiver of goosebumps to erupt on your skin. Your breath hitched slightly as you gripped the parchment tighter, never breaking contact with his eyes. A sharp pain suddenly shot through your finger.

"Ouch," You gasped, the essay falling to the ground as you let go of it, rushing to grab your injured finger. Severus's brows furrowed at you.

"Are you alright?" He cast a glimpse at your finger that you were now squeezing tight, a tiny spot of blood beginning to dribble down it.

"Mhm, just a cut, I think I accidentally cut myself on something that was stuck to the paper." You laughed awkwardly, a little embarrassed as you flipped it over to see a shard of glass stuck to it in a sticky substance. You placed the parchment back onto his desk and looked down at your finger. A scarlet liquid was beginning to ooze out, and fast. You exhaled, feeling a little woozy. Blood was never your strong suit - as a matter of fact, you hated it. The sight of it always made you feel so lightheaded.

Severus noticed your unusual behaviour and quickly rose from his seat, rushing to your side. "Let me," He sighed softly, his hands taking ahold of yours, an electric jolt shooting through you. Your breath hitched once more as you glanced up at him, your wide, doe-like eyes meeting his sparkling obsidian ones. Severus felt like he couldn't breathe for a moment. He was trapped in your eyes, the buzz filling his body up like a drug. You drew him in so easily, and it didn't help that you were excruiatingly even more beautiful up close. The moonlight did you no justice in that greenhouse.

Forcing himself to tear his eyes from yours, he reluctantly looked back down to your injured finger, retrieving his wand from his sleeve. The moment he'd taken your hand in his, his mind went insane. There was no other feeling like it. Merlin, he wished he could experience that moment all over again.

"Does it hurt?" He asked, voice quiet, aiming the tip of his wand over the cut. You hadn't looked away from him once.

"No." You whispered. Severus's head shot up, his worried eyes meeting yours instantly. A warmth spread throughout his body, engulfing him. The two of you were so close, sheer milimetres apart. So close that if one of you leaned forwards even the tiniest amount, the tips of your noses could touch. He needed to stop getting himself into these situations with you, he wasn't going to get over you if you kept ending up inches apart.

His hot breath was on familiar territory again, tickling your pink cheeks, caressing your jaw. Like you were pulled forwards, you found yourself gradually leaning toward him with parted lips, testing the water as you brushed the tip of your nose against his larger one; soft eyes flicking between his lips and his two pools of black. You hesitated, waiting for Severus to respond, your heart thundering against your ribs like a starved lion locked within a cage.

His wand-holding hand faltered slightly, the tip tickling your palm as it grazed your skin; your creeping presence sending his own heart racing. A soft gasp left you as it touched your hand. Severus's mind was fighting desperately for him to pull away, to save you and him the heartache. Perhaps months ago, he'd listen. However, having you so close to him, so vulnerable and soft-looking, he couldn't help himself. Against the wishes of his mind, he tipped his head forwards with half-lidded eyes, nudging the side of your nose with his. Every bone in his body was screaming at him to pull away, to push you away to spare his heart. He knew he wouldn't be able to deal with the aftermath if you suddenly decided one day that he wasn't enough for you anymore. However, he decided that you were entirely worth the risk in this current moment.

You swallowed and allowed a hand to slip up onto his chest, your fingers splaying out slightly across the broad area. With a slow, controlled inhale, your eyes fluttered open to look up at his through your lashes. His tongue poked out sheepishly, wetting his lips as the two of you stared at one another, waiting for the other to make the first move.

He shuffled forwards once more, your lids fluttering shut as Severus pressed a soft and slow kiss against your lips. It was gentle, sweet and reserved. Tender, tickling you like butterfly wings. A warmth bloomed in your chest and your body leaned in instinctively towards his, silently begging him for more. As Severus pulled away, your eyes were still shut.

"Kiss me again," you whispered, "please."

The last word was all the encouragement he needed from you.

Severus leaned in once more, pressing another gentle kiss against your lips, another buzz of electrifying warmth sweeping through the two of you. It suddenly felt as if the world had stopped turning, like you'd been shot into another dimension as Severus held you close, his cool skin a great contrast against your burning skin. Your shallow breaths hitched once more as he sheathed his wand back up his sleeve, a hand coming to rest tenderly against your cheek; cradling your face like it was the most precious thing in the world as he kissed you. A part of you was melting at how gentle and soft he was being with you, and the other, wilder part was begging him to deepen the kiss; to just take control of you and show you how much you truly meant to him.

Your cardigan had slipped off of your shoulder as you leaned into his tender touch, exposing your skin to the chilly, damp air of his classroom sending a shivering chill through your body. Your other hand quickly snaked up his strong chest to meet your opposing one. After a moment, they found themselves nestled around his neck, a speck of blood staining his white collar from your finger as you grazed past it. Severus's other hand swiftly made its way to your waist and pulled you close, his body desperate to become drunk in your warmth once more. A soft moan bubbled in your throat as Severus peppered gentle kisses against you, pleading him to go further.

Almost immediately, he caved at the sound of you, his fingers digging into your clothed-flesh, any feeling of guilt fleeing from your body. Gods, you were so wrong, Ben was nothing compared to Severus. Ben never made you feel an ounce of the way that he did - you couldn't remember a time where Ben had touched your body the way he did, nor a time where Ben had kissed your lips as he did.

The two of you had become lost within each other as you made out sloppily in his classroom, his hands gripping you so deeply that the worries of Severus leaving bruises upon your supple skin had vanished from your mind. In fact, deep down, you were hoping he did. The way his hands held your body was heavenly, other-worldly.

You were a little embarrassed at how easily you folded with this man.

Severus's current state of mind was the total opposite of yours. In his head, all he heard was the constant chant of something telling him to stop. He pushed past it, drowning the voices out with harsher kisses, forcefully grabbing you tighter, pulling another moan from your lips. His conversation with Minerva from earlier began to rear its head within his own, torturing him. His stomach twisted awfully, and suddenly there was a bad taste in his mouth.

What the hell was he doing? You were seeing someone.

You were seeing someone.

Is this how pathetic and utterly sad he was? That he immediately latched onto you because he finally felt appreciated, wanted? For once, he didn't feel like a burden to the world. He felt validated, desired, perhaps even loved - everything he had ever wanted when he was younger. Your soft touches sent him spiralling, and he couldn't escape this maze of uncertainty. Did you truly feel something for him or was this some sort of sick, twisted fantasy you had? Were you just taking advantage of him? Was he so easy to be manipulated? He hoped not, he'd worked incredibly hard to get ahold of his emotions; imprisoning them. And you were breaking those thick walls down like dominoes.

"Severus, you're hurting me," Your voice suddenly whined, tearing him from his thoughts as your fingers touched his shaking hand that was gripping your hipbone like a merciless vice. Almost immediately, he released you from his grasp and stepped away, turning his back to you ashamedly. Several seconds of silence passed through the pair of you, your fingers lingering on the sore area, gently rubbing it in an attempt to soothe the ache. "Are you okay?" You kept your voice quiet and soft, careful not to startle him. He clearly wasn't in a good state of mind.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, his head drooping, "I shouldn't have kissed you." Severus slowly turned around, his body parallel to yours, a solemn look upon his features. "It was wrong of me, and I was selfish." Severus added, his lips molding into that familiar, emotionless flat line as he stared at you. You frowned and reached your hand out to him, however, he shied away from it. Your chest tightened as you quickly pulled your hand back, hurt by his rejection. All this emotional warfare was wearing you down.

He's running away again, you thought, a shock of fear bolting through you.

"Why are you sorry?" Your brows furrowed deeply as you wrapped your arms around your body, the chill of the dungeon devouring you once more. You instantly missed his warmth against you.

"You're with Bluewater, are you not?" Severus's eyes hardened as he spoke that wretched name. Suddenly, your throat felt incredibly tight. Shit, Ben- he'd totally slipped your mind the moment Severus had kissed you. You'd undoubtedly made a bad habit of forgetting him when in the presence of Severus...

"Erm, yes." You said quietly. The tone of your voice had him confused. You sounded regretful.

Severus stood straighter as his hands slinked away behind his back. You shrunk underneath his towering height.

The next thing you wanted to say could ruin it all. You had no idea whether Severus felt the same. Did he feel something for you, or was it just lust for him? Perhaps some sort of fantasy of fooling around with a younger professor? Everything you'd built could come crashing down like a burning plane within seconds. Your hands suddenly felt clammy as you fought to find the right words, your mouth quivering.

"I..." you breathed out as your eyes fell to the ground for a moment, staring hard. "He's not you." You glanced back up at Severus, his scrutinising eyes sending your lungs into a breathless spasm. You felt like you couldn't breathe as you waited for his reply.

"Don't be a fool, Y/N." Severus's voice was cold. It made your stomach drop. Was this his way of rejecting your affections?

"I'm serious." You chewed on the inside of your cheek, eyes studying his unwavering stony face.

"You can do far better than me. I will only hurt you, Y/N," he spoke, his voice deep and languid, "I will destroy you in the most beautiful way possible, I will make it impossible to live a life without pain and regret. People do not linger around me for certain reasons."

"Yet I'm still here." You huffed quietly, your fingers squeezing your arms out of frustration.

"For now." Severus mused sarcastically, wallowing in his self-hatred. It hurt you to see his true opinion of himself, and it made your mind race with reasons as to why he despised himself so much.

"Why can't you see yourself the way I do?" You sighed softly, almost defeatedly, gazing at the man in front of you. Severus hated how your eyes were laden with sorrow.

"You look at the world with rose-coloured glasses. I do not." He replied. Those deep, black eyes had suddenly lost the flicker in them, and it pained you. He began to move, sweeping back to his desk, taking a seat behind it - still disorderly and untidy.

You were quiet, quite obviously hurt. Severus's jaw clenched, an ache spreading across his chest as a deep sigh fell through his nostrils. 

"Why do you always shut me out, Severus?" A shaky exhale left you as your eyes burned. The emotional rollercoaster that this man was sending you on was truly heartwrenching.

He was silent in response to your question, eyes stuck to his messy desk, an indelicate representation of his current state of mind.

"Severus, answer me," you demanded, attempting to sound as stern as possible, though it was a pathetic failure as your voice broke; breathy sobs fighting to escape your throat. "Why are you so scared of this?"

"I will only hurt you, Y/N." He said, too afraid to look at you. Severus couldn't bear to see you so upset, especially because of him.

"You don't know that." You replied, voice soft.

"And you do?" Severus's head snapped up at you, frustrated, his eyes cold and ruthless; back to their usual appearance. A quiet gasp shot out of your quivering mouth. "Bluewater is better for you." He admitted. How could he say that when he'd said you'd deserved better than him?

"You have no idea what you're talking about!" You cried out, the building frustration within you finally crumbling and spilling out through your tears. Severus looked away from you, physically unable to watch you cry. Gods, he wanted to rush to you and hold you, tell you that everything was going to be alright, but he couldn't. He had no idea if things were going to be okay. And they definitely wouldn't be if he had the honour of callilng you his. "Y/N-" His eyes were still avoiding you, too ashamed to even look at you.

"No, Severus, what gives... what gives you the right to kiss me, to pull me so close to you and then suddenly shove me away like I'm nothing but a piece of dirt on your shoe?" You rambled, your hands flying outwards frantically as hot tears rolled down your cheeks. It was embarrassing how unravelled you'd become, but you couldn't stop yourself. He'd finally broken you. "You can't keep doing this to me, I can't- it's..." Your lungs and throat burned. You'd exhausted yourself. "To kiss you? Did you not initiate it?" He scowled at you. "You were the one pushing your face into mine!"

"Okay, sure, I admit to that- but you didn't have to kiss me! You could have walked away!" You cried, walking up to his desk and pointing a finger at his face. Immediately, his lip curled upwards, his features twisting into a disdainful scowl.

"Is that not what you wanted?! For me to kiss you?!" Severus bellowed, rising from his desk chair, his hands slamming down onto the desk furiously. This time you didn't flinch, too distracted by the flaming hot anger searing through your veins.

"Did you?!" You exclaimed back at him, leaning forwards over his desk. One more time, the two of you were impossibly close - so close that you were sure you could feel the angry heat radiating from each other's bodies.

The room was suddenly dead silent, and yet, the only things the two of you could hear were the ragged, desperate breaths that seeping out of your heaving chests.

"Go to hell, Snape." You whispered with a red face. You felt humiliated, angry, upset- actually, you were certain every single emotion was surging through you right now; the way your body was trembling uncontrollably made you sure of it.

Severus's lack of an answer more than enough for you. With a frustrated, teary-eyed huff, you spun around, storming straight for his door.

Jesus, how could you have fallen for such a cruel man? Were you so blind? He had an abysmal reputation for a reason, yet you still selfishly thought that you could change him, that you could fix him and make him a better person. And you were wrong, Gods, were you so. Fucking. Wrong. 

You were only three steps away, when a strong hand suddenly gripped your arm, spinning you around with force. You whirled around, taken by surprise as Severus crashed his lips against yours, his touch-hungry hands rushing carelessly to grasp at your waist, drawing your body into his. He was like a devouring flame, hungry and starving for its fuel of life. You gasped against his lips, your body soon falling victim to his alluring aura, melting shamelessly into him. Your mind clouded with lust and desire as your hands swiftly settled around his neck once again, desperately tugging him as close to you as possible as a few stray tears fell from your closed eyes, wetting both of your cheeks. You were unabashedly needy for his touch - for his lips, for his whole self in general - your body and heart was begging for him, and Severus noticed.

*

Severus pushed you backwards towards the very desk that the two of you had brewed the Mandrake potion a year ago, his hands slipping underneath your thighs to lift you up effortlessly. Your bum grazed against the surface as he placed you down, a rogue piece of wood tearing the hem of your nightdress slightly. You spread your legs, inviting him in, his hips pressed against the edge of the desk as he kissed you hungrily. Severus's hands slipped up from your thighs and felt their way up to your waist again, squeezing you tenderly, shooting a delicious shiver up your spine. He pulled a delicate moan from your lips as he let one of his hands snake up to your neck, his thumb grazing against the side of your breast on its travels. A groan bubbled in his throat at the sultry noise, a thrilling jolt trembling through him as his hand gently grasped the back of your neck, his cold fingers tickling the nape of it.

You mindlessly wrapped your legs around his hips, tugging him closer with each lingering kiss like he could be ripped away from you any second. Severus's hips rutted against yours and you gasped, prompting an animalistic groan from his mouth. 

Your hands fell from his neck, sliding agonisingly slow down his torso and halting themselves at his hips, toying with the buckle and buttons of his trousers. Instantaneously, with his wet and swollen lips still glued to yours, his hand abandoned your waist to help you with his clothing, unbuckling them one-handedly. You were impressed to say the least.

As you fumbled with his zipper, Severus returned his hands to your body. His slender and skilled fingers found your cardigan and slipped it off of your shoulders and arms, discarding it to the ground. You whined slightly at the sudden bitter air, though it was soon silenced as Severus delved his wet tongue wildly into your mouth, licking and caressing it against your own. You moaned as he moved his mouth down to your jaw, nipping at it sweetly, his tongue leaving a hot trail as he made his way down toward your neck; his fingers having a mind of their own as they flew to your shoulders, tugging at the straps of your nightdress. Another breathless moan tumbled freely from your mouth as Severus sucked sweetly on your neck, pushing you backwards onto the surface of the table. You let yourself be guided by him as you laid back on the desk, arching yourself as your hands flew from his hips to the back of his neck, diving your fingers into his thick, mop of black hair, urging him to continue.

Your lids are lazy and heavy as you let him ravage your neck with sinful lips. "Severus," You whispered, breathless, sending a shockwave through him. "Need you-" A lewd whine left you as your body rocked hungrily against his.

"Patience," He whispered back against your hot skin, panting. You whined once more, evidently unhappy with his response. Severus chuckled, pulling away from your slender neck, your hands sliding down from the mess of his hair to his clothed biceps. He leaned down toward your face once more, a pool of warmth flourishing in his torso as he gazed down at you. He lifted a large hand and placed it tenderly against your cheek, his thumb brushing against the pinkened apples of your cheeks. Instinctively, you leaned into his sweet touch, your cheeks flushing a deeper shade of red, inducing a rare smile upon Severus's lips. You allowed your fingers to shift from his tensed arms to the hem of his cloak on his chest.

"What?" You asked quietly, a coy smile gracing your full, swollen lips as you beckoned him closer with a tug at his cloak that lingered between the pads of your fingers.

"Nothing." He rumbled in his deep voice, still staring at you. You sucked in a cheek and bit down on the inside of it, the overwhelming feeling of vulnerability eating you up. His thumb brushed against your cheek again, sending a shiver throughout your body.

"Then kiss me again, will you?" You laughed softly, slightly embarrassed at the dishevelled state you were currently in. You gave another tug at his cloak again. Severus's lips quirked upwards again at your demand, caving at your sweet voice. He leant down slowly, large nose brushing against yours in an intimate fashion as he pressed a soft, chaste kiss against your reddened lips.

In this tender and soft moment that you shared with Severus, all you wanted to do was remain here forever. Seeing him act so warm and soft with you felt like a fever dream. From the callous way he spoke to you in the first year, you never expected a man like him to have such a gentle and delicate side. It was momentous - he'd finally succumbed to you, allowing you into his world; a side of him you never thought you'd ever see. And you were eternally grateful for it.

You felt yourself becoming lost in his addicting touch again as his hands travelled down your body, gently caressing your flaming hot skin. They reached your thighs, squeezing them, and your back arched into him; the fire from before burning hotter.

Kissing you, Severus trailed the tips of his fingers down your legs, toying with the hem of your nightdress, slowly and teasingly guiding it up towards your thighs. The sensation sent a chill down your spine as the crisp air nipped at your bare legs, excited goosebumps erupting all over you. With a delicious, muffled hum, he hooked a finger underneath the string of your underwear, pulling at it.

"You want this?" He muttered against your lips, his eyes fluttering open for a brief moment.

"Yes," you panted, "please, yes."

At the sound of your pleas, Severus slipped your lacy panties off of you, discarding them on the ground with your cardigan. Instantly, he grazed his hand up the inner side of your calf, and up your thigh, coming to a teasingly close stop at where you needed him most. You whined, rocking your hips into him, begging, pleading him to touch you. A throaty growl rumbled out of him, and he mashed his lips harsher against yours, diving his tongue into your wet mouth, engaging in a heated quarrel with your own. You gasped as his hand finally settled on your burning core, a single cool finger delving itself between your wet folds, circling around your sensitive bud.

A strangled moan left your mouth as he added another finger, tracing the outline of you agonisingly slow, a coil tightening within the confines of your belly. You were panting helplessly now as he teased you, losing all control as Severus slipped his fingers inside of you, extracting a high-pitched whine from your throat. You grit your teeth as he curled them inside of you, clutching at any last bit of strength within you to stop yourself from screaming out. Your body was trembling now, hopelessly, as Severus had you wrapped around his fingers quite literally.

You exhaled, "Severus," with a whiny moan, he pulled away from your mouth and removed his fingers from you and brought them up to your lips. Without hesitation, you parted them, prompting Severus to dip them into your mouth, your tongue curling around them sinfully. A groan bubbled in the back of his throat as you tightened your legs around his hips, begging for him to continue.

A smug smirk picked at the corners of his lips as he stared at you. Your lips were wrapped around his two fingers, saliva dripping messily from them, your eyes blown and dark, hungry for more of him.

"Such a good girl," Severus uttered, tilting his chin upwards. You almost combusted right then and there. "You always were." He hummed. Instantly, your hands flew to his trousers, tugging at them with wild determination. You couldn't wait any longer, you needed him now.

He pulled his fingers out of your pretty mouth and helped you, lowering his trousers; the growing tent in his boxers driving you insane. Your fingers hook at the hem of them as his own did with your panties, pulling them down urgently. A fierce flicker of lust and desire flashed in your eyes as his cock bounced free, your legs tugging him closer to you once more, a whimper leaving your lips in an attempt to persuade him to finally take you.

"Sev, please," The way you shortened his name in your soft, enticing and whiny voice almost sent him tumbling over the edge. He drew a sharp breath as he placed a hand against your cheek, and his other underneath your nightdress upon your waist, his fingers finally touching and squeezing your naked flesh. He groaned as you rutted your hips against him again. Without a delay, he slipped himself inside of you, the pair of you moaning together at the intense flash of pleasure washing over you like a tsunami.

Severus's mind was jaded as he fucked you, his mouth parting and lips quivering as he allowed himself to become lost in the ripples of unwavering bliss that rattled through his body. Your hands snaked up to his face and cradled it sweetly, pulling him back down to meet your lips again. The kisses were short and sweet, nothing like the hungry and harsh ones before.

Your head fell back slightly, your bottom lip caught between his teeth as Severus's full length sheathed itself inside of your warm, hot core; the delicious slapping of yours and his flesh echoing in his classroom. All those years ago, studying in here, never did you think that you'd find yourself right here in this sensual moment.

Severus's hand that was sat on your waist slipped downwards and settled itself on your hip, fingers digging harshly into your skin as he felt himself teetering closer to the edge. His breaths were becoming ragged, laboured and heavy, and so he brought his other hand down to your womanhood, slipping his fingers between your folds once more to thumb your clit. As he circled it skillfully, your body quaked with every rub, strings of moans and gasps falling freely and shamelessly from your busied mouth. The coil within you tightened, and your fingers sunk themselves into his mop of black hair once more, gripping it with force as your body shook uncontrollably.

Severus's thrusts became sloppy and uncalculated as he pulled his face back from you, watching as you came undone beneath him; your face twisting in a dangerously beautiful manner as the coil snapped. He moved his hands from you and placed them beside your hips as your walls clenched frantically around him, and Severus himself was sent tumbling over the edge, a broken and throaty animalistic moan slipping out of his mouth as his body gave out, collapsing over you. Catching himself with his hands, he transferred his weight to his elbows and forearms, leaning up slightly to gaze at you. His black eyes twinkled beautifully in the amber glow of his classroom, a flush of warmth blossoming over your spent, sweaty body. A gentle giggle came from you, and he found himself smiling. Usually, it felt odd for such an expression to take hold of his features, however, with you, it felt natural. Like it was meant to be there.

*

(end of 18+)

He allowed himself a moment to recuperate as your fingers softened their grasp in his hair, gradually glazing to his cup his red cheeks, thumbs brushing sweetly against his burning skin. He pulled himself out of you and pulled up his trousers, buckling them up. He pulled your nightdress back down over your legs, his hand lingering over your thigh.

"Don't you look happy with yourself," you giggled again, and Severus hushed you with a gentle kiss on your lips. "I never thought I'd see the day."

"What do you mean?" He frowned softly, thumb brushing against the silk material that covered your thigh. A warmth pooled in your belly at his touch.

"You're smiling, and it's not forced... or sarcastic." You smiled, biting down on your bottom lip playfully.

"I can't help myself," Severus muttered, his face mere centimetres away from yours, "You just seem to pull them out of me." The warmth within your burned a little hotter.

"Don't stroke my ego, you'll regret it, Sev." You joked, a toothy grin replacing the sweet smile. He chuckled at you.

"I hate to bring this up, however, it's niggling at my mind," Severus suddenly sighed, the tiny flicker of a smile that was on his face disappearing. "What about Bluewater now?"

You scrunched your nose up at the sound of his name, the guilt that once vanished making a very hasty return to your body, sinking into your aching shoulders. "Um," you winced, "I don't know. I can't exactly... end things with him whilst he's staying here, erm, I'm not sure how he'll react." You finished, allowing your fingers to brush through Severus's dishevelled black hair.

"Hm," he hummed, pondering. "what does that mean... for us?"

"We will just have to grin and bear it until he 'deems it safe to leave'." You made a face, mocking Ben's words from that moment in the Great Hall. A faint amused smile spread across Severus's face, your chest tingling at the sight of it. "And I'm not sure I can tell him about us, he might just lose it, you know how he... you know- hates you."

"That would truly be a sight to behold," Severus smirked, the arrogance in him slithering out. You rolled your eyes at him. "However, we must be wise in our decisions, I do not want you getting hurt." His other hand held your cheek, fingers brushing a stray strand of messy hair behind your reddening ears.

"Do you think you can handle acting like you hate me for a few more days?" You asked, a bashful grin gracing your blushing face. Your hand settled atop of his large one as he caressed your cheek. Severus couldn't believe how lucky he was. What on Earth did he do to deserve this? To deserve such a beautiful, kind creature like you?

"I did it for the past year, another few days is nothing." He quipped quickly, a playful tone in his voice. You scoffed at him.

"Wow," you breathed out, grinning, your hands flying to his chest to push him off of you. He obliged and leaned up, stepping out of the trap of your legs. You slipped off of the table and picked up your underwear and cardigan, putting them both back on. An embarrassed red blush fluttered across your cheeks as fresh memories of Severus rolling up your nightdress flooded your mind, almost drowning you.

"Oh, that's too far?" He laughed softly. You head flew to look at him, your heart skipping a beat from the sound of his beautiful laugh. You'd never heard it before, and it was... gorgeous, to say the least.

"That's the first time I've heard you laugh - genuinely." You gasped, an uncontrollable smile spreading across your face like a wildfire. Almost immediately, Severus's face dropped and he rolled his eyes, clearly opposed to your positive reaction. He wasn't exactly fond of being fawned over, it made him feel weak.

"And it'll be the last." He groaned, turning away from you as another sweet laugh bubbled in the back of your throat.

"I should get back, Ben is probably wondering where I am, or... he's still asleep, oblivious to the world." You sighed heavily, padding towards Severus's tall, cloaked form. He slowly turned around, his black eyes sparkling in the orange torchlight.

"Yes," He said softly, fingers coming up to hold your chin. All sense and feeling suddenly drained from your legs. "Though I'm not sure I can promise to stay away from you, let alone keep my hands off of you." Severus muttered, his deep, languid voice sending a shock through your smaller body.

Your breath hitched, "Well, you're going to have to try," you exhaled softly, eyes flicking between his. He brought your chin up, cool fingers grasping it sweetly, and pressed a tender kiss upon your lips. Naturally, your hands flew up to sit against his strong chest, a guttural groan emitting from his throat as he kissed you. You had to swallow the moan that threatened to slip from you, feeling yourself become aroused all over again. "Alright, I really have to go." You whispered against his mouth, though your body was showing the complete opposite of what you said.

You kissed him back, a little harder, tracing your tongue against the surface of his bottom lip. "Go, then." He murmured back, hands slipping from your face and down to your waist, gripping you teasingly slow. You arched into him, breaths becoming shallow and wanting.

"I'm trying," you whimpered, "you're making this very hard."

"Let me make it easy for you then." Before you could protest, Severus tore himself from you, a needy, desperate whine falling from your lips.

"Gods, you're such a tease." You groaned, folding your arms against your chest, a clear show of disappointment. Severus couldn't help but smile at you. You looked so incredibly cute with that unhappy frown on your little face.

"My apologies." Severus mused sarcastically. "Now, go, I will see you tomorrow."

You sighed, "Alright, fine..." eyes looking at his form dangerously, rousing him.

"Stop it, Y/N."

"What?"

"You know exactly what you're doing."

"Do I?" You blinked, an innocent look crossing your features.

"Leave. Now." Severus said sternly, gesturing to the door as he swept behind his desk, seating himself.

"Alright, I'm going." You couldn't help but smile cheekily as you moved towards the door, fingers clicking it open reluctantly. "Same time tomorrow?"

"We'll see. Now, go."

And so you did, slipping out of his classroom sneakily, making sure to shut his door as quietly as possible with the brightest smile on your blushing face.

What the hell just happened?

Part 12!

oh LORDT. i do hope i wrote that scene well, it was tough i won't lie. however, credit to the weeknd, bro really helped me.

let me know your thoughts, i'm always curious to see what you think :)

i love you guys!! thank you again!! make sure to drink enough water, it's getting super hot again ffs! >:(

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@a-laufeyson

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@livillain00

@meowskii

@nooneeveryonenoone

@vesperbatty

@biggest-simp-eversposts

@881127fara

@freshmoneyalmondathlete

@sonoluvr22

@v3lv3tvampir3

@lashipperrubia

@camilla-black

@acakius

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@once-upon-an-imagine

@cj-ghostemoji-destielpie

@renirat

@0chemicalwaste0

[yoredoesmore]

Hello yes me again 🫢, so how about this. Reader who has incredible sense of fashion like she dress gyaru (or smth similar). And when the 3rd division is fighting kaiju or having training she's always so serious and 'cold' (she's actually a sweetheart but she just has b12ch face). They go out cuz they celebrating something and they see reader but they are suprised that she has that kind of style? Like they thought that a person who is always neat and serious in her work would dress like 'plain' and not in bright colours and skirts? Expecially with those cute accessories hairclips, bracelets(I love them) Take your sweet time don't worry I will wait 💕💅

(I hope you understand what I just wrote cuz my mind was foggy writing this💀 Btw I love your work❤️)

a/n: if i could i would give you the biggest smooch!! your requests feel like a breath of fresh air, i had so much fun writing this! i apologize for the long wait tho ^^

pairing: Fem!Reader & Third Division

genre: fluff/comedy [wc: 2,2k ]

a/n: the third division has two vice captains in this ff ^^)

enjoy!

GAL is Mind! | Hoshina Soshiro

“Third Division!” Your voice echoed through the entire training room, ice cold and sharp. Everybody immediately halted in their movements, their bodies in perfect sync with your voice.

“Salute!” The sounds of boots clicking and body's straightening brought satisfaction to your ears. A smile, though short lived, formed on your lips as your eyes fell on the rows of cadets. One of them stepped forward, gaze lifted up high in the sky as she opened her mouth.

“Thank you for today's training, Vice Captain L/n!” She yelled out.

“Thank you for today's training!” Everybody followed her suit.

“Dismissed.” And with that said you stepped away from the front and began your journey to the dressing room.

“Vice Captain L/n really is something, huh?” Kafka sighed, hands reaching for his water bottle. Heavy puffs of air escaped his lips, the effects of the training still harsh on his body.

“Tell me about it. She's gotta be the third strongest on the base for sure.” Reno replied, copying his friend and reaching for his bottle as well. He too was trying to catch his breath. Whenever it was your turn to train the Platoon, even the strongest cadets would end up collapsing after the session. Yet you walked away unscratched, with no signs of exhaustion or weariness.

“I wonder what she is like off the field..in private, you know. Shinomiya's words caused a shift in atmosphere. Immediately all feelings of enervation were forgotten as the group tried to imagine you in a more casual setting.

“Off..the field?” Kafka's gaze fell on your disappearing form.

Most of the people at the base already had a set image of you in their mind. Your cold demeanor was engraved in their heads. The fearless Vice Captain who led every fight with precision and a cool head– that was the only version of you which they knew. But they knew better than to judge a person solely from what they decided to show to the public– and not to mention that most of the time, people were different in private than in their work life in general.

They wondered if that applied to you as well.

“Wouldn't Vice Captain Hoshina know? Or Captain Ashiro. As Captains they must spend lots of time together off field, I think.” Iharu suggested. His words made sense at first but upon consulting the other Vice Captain, it seemed that you were as isolated off field as at work.

“I never really interacted with L/n outside base grounds, besides out on the battlefield of course.” Hoshina admitted, surprising the entire group.

“No way! Ain't she your work partner? Don't tell me you never went out for a drink or two? Sir.” Iharu quickly added the sir after realizing that he was talking out of line.

He was quite shocked at the Vice Captain's words and it seemed like he wasn't the only one. The entire group stood in disbelief as Hoshina told him that you were as quiet and introverted as they came.

“No, because now I really want to know what Vice Captain L/n is like off duty!” A spark had been lit inside Shinomiya. Her determination was contagious, as the others soon started to feel the same way. Even Hoshina was starting to wonder what image laid behind your nonchalant facade.

Therefore they came up with a plan to get you to ease up around them without drawing any suspicion towards their real motives.

x

“You want to..hang out?” Your voice perfectly reflected the image on your face– you were confused.

“A little get together with the other cadets sounds nice, don't it? Allows the group to bond and stuff, get their mind off things.”

Hoshina was prepared for the rejection of his life. Despite sharing many great memories at the base together, neither he nor Ashiro knew you on a very personal level. You were a strong and dedicated fighter, that was a fact. Your skills were flawless and your performances during battles praiseworthy. Yet all they got to see so far was your work behavior. You were like a ghost, hovering around the base and gaining everyone's curiosity.

“Sure, why not.”

“But it would be– whaddya say?”

“I mean why not? Sounds nice, I'm down.” A cold gaze sat on your face as you arranged the files on your desk and even your voice sounded uninterested. It gave Hoshina the impression that you were forcing yourself to agree to this meeting. Five whole minutes were needed to convince him that you really stood by your words.

At the end he walked out of your office, carefully pulling the door shut behind himself. Only after you were sure that he had left the area surrounding your office did you manage to produce a small smile.

“Yay!”

x

“She said yes just like that?!” The squad could barely believe their ears. Hoshina simply shrugged his shoulders, unsure of what to say. He himself still had to process the fact that you willingly agreed to this, without arguing or rejecting him. But then again, you never made a ruckus when having to pick up an extra shift or taking care about some more paperwork, therefore who knew what truly went through your mind.

“Am I the only one who is getting nervous?” Kafka asked into the round.

It was such a silly discussion, the mystery behind your personality, yet everyone involved found themselves curious to seek the answer.

“Vice Captain probably dresses really well! Like elegant and modest.” Shinomiya chimed in, clapping her hands together.

“I can definitely see that too.” Aoi agreed. The group began to chat and talk about the event of the night and how you were going to appear in front of them. They talked and talked, just for a little bit longer, before they returned to work.

x

A couple hours later and the time for the rendezvous came closer and closer. Throughout the day, Hoshina managed to ask Captain Ashiro if she too wanted to join the festivities and to everyone's surprise she agreed as well.

“I too want to see the Vice Captain in her casual glory.” Ashiro said with a straight face and sparkles in her eyes.

Everyone arrived around the agreed on time, some earlier and some later, but at the end they all gathered in front of the fine establishment.

“Oh, L/n just texted me that she is already inside!” Ashiro had a soft smile sitting on her lips, happy about the fact that you had texted her.

“Am I the only one who feels excessively excited??” Iharu looked around the group for validation.

“Nah, I'm just as excited” Izumo placed a reassuring hand on the other one's shoulders. “But I do feel like we are totally doing too much. I mean, it's just the Vice Captain.” The group was unsure if Izumo's words were directed towards everyone else or just himself, as he had quite the distressed look on his face. Shinomiya, Hoshina and Reno on the other hand carried a blank look on their faces. Their excitement manifested itself in the form of silence.

“Does anybody see her?” Kafka asked.

The bar was of decent size. It was most likely on the more fancier side. Not too many guests sat seated at the tables and from their point of view they should have had a clear vision of the whole place. Yet you remained to be discovered.

All they saw was another group of businessmen, a handful of couples, a person who seemed to be having a stroke in the corner and some young college students who were being a little too noisy..

Ashiro was about to ask a staff member for help, when all of a sudden a stranger approached them.

“Guys? I have been waving at you for the past two minutes, didn't you see me?”

Silence

In front of the group stood a woman, who's stroke turned out to be her attempt of getting their attention. She was dressed in attire that did not fit the establishment's vibe.

l

Her long eyelashes were a perfect match for the dramatic makeup she had put on. Half of her hair was put into a high ponytail, with the ends strongly curled. Although her head lacked charms and accessories, many of those were found on her long, white nails. The clothes she wore perfectly reflected everything that was going on in her face.

A skirt so short sat around her hips that the group feared that it would only take her one bad step to reveal herself. They just hoped that the golden star belt she wore was good enough to hold everything in place. What truly topped everything off weren't the dark fur leg warmers or the thick golden chains hanging from both her belt and neck, but rather the bold, off shoulder cheetah print shirt.

To put everything in simpler words– she was a looker for sure.

“...L/n?” Shinomiya was the first one to open her mouth.

“Yes?”

“WHAT?!” Kafka could barely contain himself. Shock wasn't even expressive enough to describe the sheer disbelief he was currently feeling. His eyes were stuck on the countless bracelets you were wearing, trying to count them all. Meanwhile Izumo and Aoi still had to pick their jaws off the floor.

“Ya gotta be kiddin me..” Hoshina cursed under his breath, his eyes still drinking in the image of you.

From all he had expected, this would have been the last thing. Seeing you in such revealing and bold attire, it was out of character for you. Even Ashiro found herself speechless as she slowly started to recognize your face behind all the accessories and makeup.

And let's not get started on Shinomiya who almost fainted.

“Do..I have something on my face?” Your voice was genuine and filled with confusion.

“Everything!” Iharu blurted out, earning a slap from Reno.

“This..is just very unexpected.” The white haired man tried to explain in the best words available.

“Unexpected is puttin it lightly! Shit, you sure this is our Vice Captain??” Iharu barely finished his sentence before the second slap from Reno came flying towards the back of his head.

“Oh. Yeah, I figured you guys would be surprised. I tried to tone it down a little and left some accessories at home but once I get dressed I can barely hold myself back.” You smiled softly.

For some it was the first time seeing you present such a sweet smile. It melted their hearts in an instant and forced them to question everything about you that they knew.

As you showed the way to the table, the group of people behind you silently fought about who got to sit next to you. Both power and authority were abused, as Hoshina and Ashiro ended up by your side with Shinomiya getting the seat right in front of you.

There it was, the moment they all have been waiting for. The silence was so strong that it became one of the loudest things in the entire place.

Their gazes poked holes through your outfit but you simply sat there, enjoying their attention. Such close interactions did not exist at work, as all were too afraid of you. They did not go unnoticed by you, the comments and whispers about your unapproachable behavior. There were obviously no ill intentions in their words but it still hurt you a little that nobody tried to get to know you on a personal level.

Your shyness and professionalism were labeled off as coldness on your very first day and ever since you had found it quite difficult to build more skin deep relationships. That is why you were beyond happy when Hoshina asked you to join them today.

“Have you always been dressing like this?” Shinomiya asked the question that has been on everybody's mind. The sparkle in her gaze returned, her eyes shining with nothing but admiration for you.

“Yes, pretty much. My mother was a Rokku Gyaru and taught me everything I needed to know. Started off as a Kogal and slowly found my way into the world of Tsuyome.”

Everybody listened with great attention as you explained your sense of fashion. It was the most talkative they have ever experienced you in, it was a memory to cherish. It made you feel awfully happy, their kindness and acceptance, that you temporarily lost yourself.

“Sorry Vice Captain, but I really didn't take you for the kind who would dress like that. So bold and carefree..but now that I think about it it suits you quite well!”

“Thank you a lot, Kafka.” You both exchanged mutual smiles.

“Same here. I first thought that you were gonna come in all formal and shit but this really hits the spot.”

“Your head will swell if I hit you one more time, moron.” Reno shot the red head a deadly glare.

“I know that I come off as cold sometimes, but I can't help it. I like to express myself with my appearance and actions rather than words and not to mention– in this field of work I just cannot afford to be as silly and expressive as my clothes.’

“It is very impressive that you are able to have these different sides to you.” The woman next to you spoke.

Much more time was spent talking about certain fashion styles, life and work at the defense force. The night was long and who knew when the next time would come where you got to talk the way you did now? Therefore you talked and talked, until all troubles and thoughts were taken off your minds.

a/n: i literally threw up couple hours ago and i got so mad bc i really wanted to upload this fic today so i swallowed a pain killer, took a nap and got right to the editing after waking up 😭 don't play with me stupid migraine (ง'-̀̀'́)ง

btw, if you want to get a better image of tsuyome (the gyaru subculture) make sure to google it! It is sooo pretty!!

[darkly-stagnating-fish-tank]

last day for request so let's go!!

chasing stars (i love ff don't mind me) with someone from fantasista squad going out with reader for the halloween night (i leave costumes to your imagination)

WELP UHM I CAN DO IT 🔥🔥 (sorry it was kinda late i got a bit more sick😞but im fine now yippee)

Chasing Stars - Toya Aoyagi x reader

Halloween Night - Trick or Treat!

-

You bounced around, clearly excited. It would be your boyfriend's first time going trick-or-treating and it would be with you.

The October air had a chill to it, carrying the scent of fallen leaves and distant bonfires. You adjusted your fairy costume and turned to look at Toya, who was standing beside you, staring down at his bag like it was some foreign artifact. His prince costume seemed a little heavy on him.

“Toya, are you nervous?” you teased, grinning. You could tell he was a little out of his element, but there was something adorable about seeing him this way—almost bashful in his costume.

“…Maybe a little.” He glanced at the line of houses down the street, each with its own decorations, from cobwebs draping bushes to pumpkins grinning from porches. “I’ve never done this before. It feels… odd.”

“Odd? C’mon, Toya, it’s the easiest thing in the world! All you do is walk up, knock, say ‘Trick or treat!’ and get candy.” You demonstrated with exaggerated gestures, hoping to break through his serious demeanor.

He chuckled softly, brushing a bit of his cape back. “You make it sound so simple.”

“It is that simple!” you reassured, nudging him playfully. “Besides, I’m here to show you how it’s done. You’re gonna be a pro by the end of the night.”

You led him toward the first house, showing him how to hold his bag out and flash his most convincing smile (not that he needed convincing, he was already so charming). When the door opened, Toya paused for a moment, glancing over at you as if to ask, Am I doing this right? You gave him a thumbs-up, and he stammered out a soft, “Trick or treat.”

To his surprise, the homeowner grinned and dropped a handful of candy into his bag. Toya looked down, almost bewildered at the small pile of sweets.

“See?” you said, beaming. “Not so hard, right?”

He nodded, a small, contented smile sneaking onto his face. “It’s… actually pretty nice.”

The two of you continued down the street, collecting treats and laughing over the costumes of other trick-or-treaters. Toya was steadily getting the hang of it, even adding his own little twist, bowing politely after each house.

As the night went on, he turned to you, his eyes reflecting the excitement of the evening. “Thank you. This is… more fun than I expected.”

You smiled, your heart warming at how happy he looked. “Anytime, Toya. Who knew Halloween could be this magical, huh?”

He nodded, his gaze lingering on you. “Maybe it’s because of the person I’m spending it with.”

Your cheeks warmed, but before you could respond, he held out a piece of candy from his stash—a sweet, simple gesture that felt like the perfect treat to end the night.

-end-

word count : 464

fun fact : Toya is my favourite Fantasquad member 😋

wattpad here

[dandywonderous]

What are your favorite video games? :)

you've activated my trap card

video games are the great love of my life, most of my time is spent playing video games, most of my favorite canons are video games. I think video games have such a unique way of telling stories compared to every other medium, and the huge variety in form that video games can take really gives them massive narrative potential. trying to narrow down to just a few is hard but I'm gonna do it

I was a 90s kid so my first big video game endeavors (besides a particular one but I'll get to it in the end) were unsurprisingly the Pokemon games. I started with Yellow but the ones I played the most were Silver and Sapphire, and Gen 3 is still my favorite even though I've played some of the gens since then. Crystal in particular though always has a place in my heart for introducing the female MC to the games; for most of my childhood, Pokemon and video games on a larger scale were always seen as things for boys (the boys on my playground even made me pass a quiz before they would let me play make believe Pokemon with them, a thing they did not make the other boys do) so Crystal adding the female MC felt like validation that I was welcome here. Representation matters! I remember there was also an old Scooby-doo game for the gameboy color I was obsessed with, and also shoutout to the Barbie horse adventure games lol

Final Fantasy will always have a special place in my heart for being the series that really got me into JRPGs, which has been a lot of what I've played since. FFX in particular, because it was my first, will always be special to me, but I also really enjoyed FFVIII (and I accept no slander) and FFXII, and more recently I loved FFXV (all the criticisms are true but damn it, doomed bachelor party road trip is such a fun time). At this point I've played every mainline FF game at least part way if not all the way to completion (except the MMOs, I don't really play MMOs, I'm a single player girly), and a lot of the spinoffs, especially the Tactics games (Tactics Advance man... what a good game). What most of the Final Fantasy games tend to do really well is the found family trope and that's what gets me about most of them.

More recently the JRPG that's held my heart the longest is Persona 5 (and its various spinoffs). I love these little criminals. They are all my sons and daughters. Royal absolutely perfected the turn based gameplay, I don't think it could have been executed better.

Puzzle games and visual novels are also what I spend a lot of time with. Ghost Trick is a transcendental experience - don't look up anything, just go play it. I promise the less you know the better it is. No one needs me to tell them how good Ace Attorney is but Ace Attorney is amazing; my personal favorite is actually Ace Attorney Apollo Justice, partially because Ema Skye is in it in her best incarnation (shoutout to the one other Ema/Klavier/Apollo shipper and your fanfic that has sustained me). I also loved the Professor Layton games. And I'm into less story driven, more laid back puzzle games like Stitch, which is the game I play whenever I just need to chill for a bit (unless I'm doing sudoku puzzles). Also more recently I thoroughly enjoyed In Stars and Time, which is like a puzzle RPG with an amazing story.

But especially on the narrative games front I looooooove Night in the Woods, one of my favorite video games of all. For one thing, there are not a lot of games or media in general that take place in the real world but in a small, dying rural town, and that setting and the characters' struggles and issues really resonated with me, as someone from a small, dying rural town. Also, Mae is an incredible protagonist, who is a female protagonist who is allowed to be massively flawed and not fit into the normal socially acceptable mold, but still be a hero, learn from her mistakes and get better. Also I'm not kidding when I say that this game's meditations on god, the nature of our existence, and what it means to be alive with other people genuinely changed my life. "When I die, I want it to hurt," is a line that will stick with me for the rest of my life.

I'm also a big fan of the "murder game visual novel" subgenre lol. Buried Stars is great, Dangan Ronpa is great, but 9 Hours 9 Persons 9 Doors is what will really hold my heart forever. 999 is such a good story, the twists are presented so expertly, and the way it used its original DS format in particular to tell its story is a masterclass in understanding how the unique format of video games can add to the narrative in ways no other medium can capture. Also the puzzles are just FUN, if you enjoy escape rooms you will love this game. The other games in the series are good too even if they kind of suck as sequels. Also why do they go out of their way not to talk about Santa?? JUSTICE FOR MY BOY!

If I were a youtube video essayist I would make a video on 999 that starts with just a twenty minute rant about how the opening sequence of 999 is one of the best in any video game ever. Like, the way it establishes the tone, the perfect pacing of it, the way it gets the player tense right along with the characters... mmmwah!

I also really like tactical RPGs, especially XCOM. It's so fun, but be prepared to die because you will, a lot. It's not a game meant for people who get attached, it will break you lol. Darkest Dungeon is also really fun but the same warning applies.

And I love farming and life sims! I played the old Harvest Moons back in the day, and more recently I've really loved Coral Island. I've also been playing a lot of Disney Dreamlight Valley, which is more like Animal Crossing but still in the cozy games genre. I need to play more of Potions Permit but I've really enjoyed what I've played of that one, if you want a cozy game vibe that isn't all about farming. And also I've been wrapped up in Infinity Nikki lately, which is a gacha game but boy is it fun (I played Love Nikki for a few years after it first came out too).

And speaking of gachas, I've played a lot of those, but the idol raisers/rhythm games are the ones that really stick with me. For a looooooong time it was Love Live School Idol Festival (RIP), but right now it is Project Sekai, a game I love and play every day. For a rhythm gacha game it has a really great story and cast of characters, and I love it a lot. I'm a VBS fan but I also love/pull for Ena and Shiho.

and this doesn't fit in any of the categories but I looooved the SSX series, especially the PS2 era of games. I played so much SSX Tricky and SSX3 and SSX On Tour. (if you're confused, they're snowboarding games lol)

god there's probably so many more that I've forgotten... I really love video games haha. But there's one in particular I wanted to talk about at the end, because this is the TRUE video game of my youth, the one I put about as many hours into as I did Pokemon, the one I played over and over on Playstation until the disc wore out, a game that is honestly very bizarre, both in the circumstances of its existence and in its plot and gameplay.

and that game is Mary-Kate and Ashley's Magical Mystery Mall.

but I'm going to put all that under a cut. Thanks for the ask! This is probably waaaaay longer an answer than you were expecting haha. I JUST. LOVE VIDEO GAMES. RRAAAAH.

OKAY so Mary-Kate and Ashley's Magical Mystery Mall was a game for the PS1 featuring the Olsen Twins (voiced and everything!) It was basically just a collection of minigames with an absolutely batshit framing narrative, being that the girls go to the mall and buy matching friendship necklaces from a mysterious traveling saleswoman (I think they do call her a word you are not supposed to use, because it was the year 2000, so be aware of that if you look it up). The woman tells them that whatever they do, do not put the two halves of the necklaces together, because it's missing some gems and weird things will happen if they do. The girls walk off and immediately dismiss her advice as stupid before putting the two halves together, which instantly freezes the mall and everyone inside in time, except the girls and the saleswoman. She then tells them that if they don't find the gems that are missing from the necklace charms and put it back together, they will be stuck in the mall forever "with no money to buy anything!" (cue NOOOOOOOOOO)

so you have to play minigames to get the charms back.

most of these are pretty normal. there's one where you do a few snowboarding races (it's no SSX but I liked it well enough), there's one where you work the mall food court (this was sort of like diner dash and I loved it), there's one where you put on a fashion show that I also liked a lot. the last two are the most interesting ones.

so one of the minigames was putting together your own music video. you pick from a bunch of dance moves to make the choreo, then you pick a shoot location, then you move the camera around to film the music video while the girls dance to the song. the game had a few preset tracks, but the really fun thing was that you had the option to have the girls dance to your own CDs (by physically switching the game disc for a CD). this meant you could have them do a music video to ANY track, of ANY length. I had them dance to music from 2 B A Master (the Pokemon CD). I had them dance to all of the songs from Aaron Carter's "Aaron's Party (Come Get It)" album (it was the early 2000s!). I had them dance to a 15 minute stand-up recording by Robin Williams just to see if it would let me (it would!). I had a lot of fun with that minigame, excellent design, video game developers take notes.

the last minigame was the weird one

so if you looked at the little booklet the game sent to tell you how to play (remember when games had those??), there was a bit at the back with the pictures of two teen boys, explaining that they had won a contest to appear as characters in the game! but where could these boys be in a game where everyone in the mall is frozen in time?

in the final minigame, that's where! the plot of which sure is something!

so the final minigame is a picture taking minigame where Mary-Kate and Ashley stalk two boys they admit they do not know so they can take pictures of them, to convince all their friends that they're dating these boys.

yes, you are actually stalking them!

at the beginning of the game, which has way more cutscenes involved than the others, you learn that one of the twins (don't remember which one now) has told all their friends that they know and are dating the cute new lifeguards at the beach! of course, they literally don't even know those guys, and now their friends are getting suspicious about the dating claim. so they decide to pose with the boys in the background to give the illusion that they're on a date. the player gets points for how close the boys are in the picture, and how convincingly it looks like they're actually posing and not just walking past.

after the first couple stages where the girls just stand on a street corner and wait for the boys to get close, the boys get wise and start trolling them. keep in mind that this is all voice acted, so you actually hear the boys start to say things like "are those girls following us? why are they taking pictures of us?" this would be a horror game in any other genre but here it's just supposed to be cute and funny.

the boys troll the twins (and you, the player) by hiding behind surfboards and inside large pots, popping out at random and making it harder to get a good picture of them (but also, ironically, making those pictures look more like they're actually on a date, because why else would they be posing like this?). I remember it took me FOREEEEVER to finally beat this minigame.

at the end, the boys come up to the twins and ask them why they're doing this, and the twins confess to the situation. the boys decide to solve the problem by actually going on a date with them. all's well that ends well!

so anyway yeah that's my oral history of Mary-Kate and Ashley's Magical Mystery Mall, a game I put more hours into than almost any other game in my youth (partly because you can play it in one sitting). the 2000s were truly a wild time.

if you read to the end bless your heart

[justanothermarauderr]

did i just went on a 10+ minutes tangent about regulus black and james potter love story and how they are so beautifully tragic on tiktok? yes

did i also explain why i will always defend them with my entire being, drunk? yes

bcs you cant say that whenever you read about about them it’s always

regulus black loves first and james potter fell harder and harder every time

they are so beautifully tragic and yes in some ff they do make it to the end. and yes they live a happy life but the most tragic ones ???????

regulus black doing everything he does just so james ( and by extension his brother ) could go on and live a happy life even if it wasn’t him??? y’all…

i will forever defend them till my lasting breath bcs i feel what regulus felt when he went into that cave

i feel his heartbreak and his hope for james, the only person he had ever loved beside his brother, to live a happy life. even if it was not with him.

regulus black had loved james potter to the point that he would be willing to sacrifice his life to be sure that james potter, his love , his life, his literal light at the end of the fckn tunnel that was tainted with the black families idiocy of following a man that wanted genocide, to have a happy and filled life.

even if it wasn’t with him.

i will forever love their stories that was picked and wrote.

the grumpy slytherin who followed his families ideals but to only be torn by a gryffindor who showed him what actually loving someone with no expectation can be and to ensure that no harm to was to come to their light.

I read somewhere that said and i quote

“ regulus black was a boy who walk like they are made of stone but his touch was like the sun”

james potter had said that in many and multiple times and ff’s

james potter was the sun and regulus black was like a stone

but to james, regulus was like a summers warmth open and warm with every touch he had made.

james potter was seen as the sun. but he would tell you otherwise if he had the chance.

regulus black was a boy who walked like he was made of stone but if james potter were to be in his orbit, his touch was like the sun. coursing through james’ veins; melting away the very expectation people wanted him to be.

regulus had rarely open to people who he finds ( and in his words) tolerable

barty crouch jr.

evan and pandora rosier

dorcas meadows

and his brother, sirius black

those were the people that knew him best.

but for him to open up to someone to, james potter

of all people

he loved his friends and brother in a familial way

it has said a lot about how regulus black love

but james

james was different

james, who loved and wouldn’t be ashamed to declared it was very much unfamiliar

regulus black loved james potter as soon as he realize that it wasn’t the same to those he was close

it altered how he viewed love and how it differentiate between them

and james

oh but james.

he loved who he loves.

It’s simple as that

but with regulus it was different

sure he serenaded lily evans but still

when james potter saw regulus black as more then his best friends little brother it

in a way

clicked

regulus black made sense to him.

he was perfect to james. regulus told him it was okay to let go. to not be held in a metaphorical pedestal everyone had put him in.

it made sense to james potter that regulus black was THE ONE.

bcs who in his life ever told him it was okay to let go and feel what he felt in that moment and breakdown bcs of what people see him as

the loving gryffindor golden boy who had no doubt towards anyone who deams worthy of the potter heirs kindness

but to regulus it wasn’t that.

he SAW what james had to put up too

the prank

cant find it his heart to hate sirius who he sees as a brother

It was hard

but the moment james was alone with regulus, the only one who see right through him, he broke.

and it says a lot more then anything.

james potter had trusted regulus enough to shed his golden boy skin and told him what he was feeling and how he was disappointed and hurt by the way sirus went about everything with snape

ofc it didn’t resonate with him like remus had felt but it still hurt nonetheless.

to not see his best friend and in his place, a unfamiliar boy who was consumed by the madness bcs of his family

it hurt james.

BUT it was regulus he seeked first

it was regulus black that told him to let go and say what he wanted to say

and i find that so beautiful that even though they saw things that put them in different sides of the war

that they somehow, and so beautifully, able to understand one another and what the other need

can you tell I’m drunk 😭

[carolinahope]

I'm not ready for 7x06. My expectations are both really high and really low. They really leaned into the Pastel & Puke promo. But experience taught me that about 90% of their promos are a misdirection. So I'm cautious and mistrustful.

It's not like I'll quit watching if Eddie doesn't propose to Buck at the end of the episode. The friends-to-fiancés trope is distinctly Buddie-shaped but I have fan fiction for that. I want an actual story for them on-screen. We deserve it, they deserve it and Oliver and Ryan will most definitely deliver.

And the FF button is there for any scenes with characters I grew weary of. I had plenty of practice. Yes, I'm talking about the other guy and the nun in this instance.

And Eddie deserves his own queer awakening and to have it handled with the same care they handle his relationship with Chris or his breakdown. He needs a break in his romantic woes, to stop searching for some perceived perfection. He needs to sit down and think really hard on what he wants, what he needs, what he has and what is missing.

Besides, Buck needs to get off of his hamster wheel first, anyway. To stop letting things just happen to him. To stop letting people treat him poorly just because they are a potential romantic partner. And see it for the point in the con column it is.

So I will take another poker date as long as this time it actually leads where it was pointing us.

But expectations, they sure can wreak havoc on poor unsuspecting fans.

ETA: Apparently they cut some parts that were already showed in promo? Like the karaoke? I'm lowering my expectations below sea level now.

[chrysopoeias]

controversial and way too long rambling about otp and fan interpretations

I cannot stand this pathological need to insist that with the royais, it is actually all along secretly Hawkeye who is the real mommy boss in the relationship, while Mustang is a barely functioning man-child that needs her instructions just to breathe. This insistence that Hawkeye must be the meaner, nastier, cooler, more badass person I see way too often. That she must be the one that is always smarter and better at everything. And above all, she must be tired and rolling her eyes out of her skull constantly for dealing with Mustang's bullshit and the whole relationship in general. 

Why can’t Hawkeye just be lame and have her issues too? Why must she be the mean alpha boss bitch? If anyone should be the mean alpha boss it’s more likely Roy ‘I punch children to get my point across’ Mustang, honestly.

And where is the love and romance in this idea, portraying one character as always annoyed and tired by the other? Portraying it as Mustang being the child that Hawkeye needs to mother, or he might end up sticking his tongue in a wall outlet down a public toilet. If I read about it one more time I will commit sudoku in minecraft.

It feels like disrespect for Mustang’s character too. The joke/gag about him being useless in certain situations only works because he has a hero complex. He is obsessed with being useful, on never giving up, especially on others. Not being able to help others highlights that and hurts him fundementally. It is not that he IS actually useless.

Hawkeye is just not the one in charge and leading the relationship and their goals. She is the one that follows, famously. It’s a repeated point that she is the more overtly insane and dependent one. Roy’s end goal is what keeps her going. She will explicitly not move on and take charge of their plan herself if she comes into that situation, she will simply give up and kill herself.

The need to see her be the one that is just better, stronger and smarter and doing everything in the dynamic all the time (while doing it perfectly ofc) annoys me. I have no idea where this comes from, besides popular bad American cartoons and movies often using the ‘clueless man x fundementally better woman’. Or it is #feminist ideas that the female character must be perfect and in charge otherwise it's too stereotypical and problematic.

I know fandom spaces are mostly made up of women, so it’s extra silly to me that women are the ones complaining about men in straight relationships putting all emotional labour on women and taking advantage of learnt helplessness to get out of tasks. And it is correct to complain about that. But then the same people turn to fiction and go ‘Aw isn’t it cute and sexy and so endearing for a male character to be completely helpless while his better and smarter and stronger mother girlfriend has to do everything for him UwU’. Truly baffling. It’s so unsexy to me.

My sickest fantasy is wanting to see mutual effort and respect in romance. Can they just both be cringe and pathetic sometimes? Strong and clever sometimes? Take care of each other and fill in when the other is lacking? For their codependecy and mess to be mutual? 

Stop making Mustang into a helpless child FFS.

[iknowshocker]

If damon would have actually left bonnie in season 6 and choose Elena would kai have saved her ?

oh anon, this is one of my TVD roman empires.

i'm a firm believer that yeah, kai was absolutely walking over to heal her himself. i swing between thinking a. that was always his plan and he never would have let her die for real and b. he decides halfway across the room that damon doesn't deserve the easy way out and he saves her to spite him. either way, he lost Jo tonight. he's not letting Bonnie go, too.

if i could rewrite it i'd do it something like this:

we'd get to hear the rest of his villain monologue and it would end with him crouching down beside her and being like "you really need better friends bonster - that could have been me if you weren't so easily manipulated"

she's glaring up at him, gasping for air: "f - uck .... o - ff"

and he'd laugh, bite his wrist, and go "is that anyway to talk to the man about to save your life??? nooo, didn't think so" and while she's drinking and clinging to him he'd get that blood sharing rush and start babbling and in my perfect world that's the moment she learns about him helping on her birthday.

"i've done this before you know, without the - the weirdly intense blood thing, bon stop looking at me you're making me lightheaded close your eyes, thanks - yeah, anyway, i've done this before. can't believe i'm playing the hero after nuking the whole coven. the irony is not lost on me, lemme tell you - what? don't squint at me, why would i make that up? i saved you on your birthday bon-,"

and she'd rip away from him and go "jeremy saved me-,"

"jeremy ? hold on, thiS WHOLE TIME YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OKay, okay sure he opened the garage door, but who do you think gave him the power to do it?"

bonnie stares up at him in horror, realizing that a witch being involved actually does make so much more sense. kai would lean in closer to her, she's probably still holding his hand so he's got the other braced by her head and she's too shocked to move away.

"i saved you, bonnie. me."

she's looking up at him, eyes frantically bouncing between his, and whispers: "but why?"

"i already told you," he'd sneer, "i felt bad. i regretted leaving you. you're the one who didn't listen. you're the one who didn't believe me. you trusted your stupid friends, and look what it got you. damon left. he picked elena. you gave up everything for him and-,"

"stop," she'd say, trying to get away. but he'd grab her chin and make her look at him.

"they don't care about you, bonnie. you're just a magical help button to them. they call you because they know you won't say no. and you know the worst part about all this? the part i hope keeps you up at night?" he'd lean in even closer, whispering in her ear: "i would have picked you."

and then he'd leave. straight vanish at vamp speed into the night. and bonnie's laying there, in the wreckage of the wedding, all alone.

she cry's.

it makes no sense...and yet it makes perfect sense. damon lies as much as kai. damon is selfish. of course he'd pick elena. shit, bonnie would probably pick elena. what does that say about her? how has she let them convince her she's not worth picking? no, enough. that ends right now. she'd pull herself together, and she'd start walking home.

she'd go straight to the salvatore house. the doors open so she walks in. everyone is there, regrouping and crying and sitting quietly in shock. no one is looking for her. what did damon even tell them, when he came back without her? why did no one come back for her body?

caroline sees her first. she stands on shaky legs, staring at her wide eyed. "oh my god, bonnie? how - damon said you - he said that kai-,"

ah, so he blamed it on kai. funny, he seems to be doing that an awful lot lately.

"he lied," bonnie says. "he does that. damon. he lies."

caroline would run to her, breathlessly laughing, but bonnie doesn't return the hug.

"stefan!" caroline yells. "stefan, come here!"

he comes vamping in, sees the look in bonnie's eyes, and goes perfectly still. there's a phone in his hand, and quietly he says: "damon, i think i know why elena's not waking up. i'm gonna call you back in a minute."

from there i want them all realizing that bonnie has to be protected from damon. in this situation he's gone full rouge and he's proved he's willing to kill bonnie to get elena back. i don't think there's a world where they go back to prison world status besties after that.

kai, of course, is probably still lurking in town. maybe he went back to portland for a bit but he always comes back...he just can't leave bonnie alone.

[jungkookjeon0007]

Nights in Vegas | CH. 8 (JJK FF)

☆ summary: When Olivia flies to Las Vegas for her first ever BTS concert w/ her best friend, she was expecting to make lots of unforgettable memories... What she wasn't expecting was to end up with the lead singer, Jeon Jungkook, knocking on her hotel room door only to find her in nothing but a towel. What will happen when the golden maknae wants to see her again? Will it lead to heartbreak, or a promising future for them both?

☆ pairing(s): jungkook x olivia.

☆ ratings: (18+) for detailed sex scenes + harsh language.

☆ genre: smut, angst, fluff.

☆ word count: 1.5k.

☆☆☆☆☆☆

We went to grab some lunch at the cutest place called The Blueberry Hill Family Restaurant and it was seriously some of the best food I've ever eaten.

We talked and had a good time laughing at each other's jokes and the most embarrassing things that have happened to us in our lives, debating whose was worse.

Once our bellies were full, it was time to take a few tours and do some sight seeing around the city. Jungkook had planned the whole day for us, so I had no idea what was on his itinerary.

We arrived at our destination and I was stunned to see a helicopter waiting for us. I looked at him with a confused expression, "A helicopter? Where are we going in a helicopter?"

He replied with a mischievous smile, "You'll have to wait and see because I can't spoil the surprise."

He winked at me, grabbing my hand, "Come on they're waiting for us"

With that I followed him to the helicopter and once we were ready for takeoff, the pilot had us put on our headphones so we can talk to each other while up in the air. We sat beside one another and as I was looking around waiting for us to take off, I felt someone staring at me. As I turned, I caught him looking at me with an adorable smile on his face. "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing, I am just thinking how happy I am to be doing this with you."

He smiled and grabbed my hand, interlocking our fingers together.

"Okay, is everyone ready for takeoff?" The pilot asked.

We both gave a thumbs up and said yes in perfect sync. The pilot smiled, starting up the helicopter and before I knew it we were up in the air. If I were afraid of heights, this would be terrifying... but like Jungkook, I was fascinated and could not believe how beautiful the view was.

Our first place to visit on the tour was the Strip of Las Vegas. We could see nothing but a boulevard of casinos, hotels, and a mash-up of replicas of the world's most iconic places (Egypt, Venice, France etc) and it was a sight to be seen. We lingered for a bit while the tour guide told us all about the Strip and why it was so popular, soon flying off to the next place on the list.

The Hoover Dam.

"This is amazing, but why is it so famous? I am curious." Jungkook stated as he peered out the window.

The tour guide once again started to explain that The Hoover Dam is famous because it protects Southern California and Arizona from disastrous floods that the Colorado area used to be common for. 

"Woah, does it do anything else besides that?" He asked full of curiosity.

I caught myself staring at him as the tour guide explained that it also provides water to irrigate farm fields and that it supplies water and power to LA and other cities in the southwest.

He stared at him with big doe eyes shining in fascination.

. . .

We toured a few other places until the guide let it slip that our final trip would be over The Grand Canyon. I gasped in awe as I saw it in the distance and grabbed Jungkook's arm in excitement, "Oh my gosh. I have always wanted to see The Grand Canyon but never actually thought that I would be able to! I am so excited right now that I could cry."

He gave me a huge smile and wrapped his arm around me, moving my headphones to whisper in my ear. "I know, Lacie may have  helped me out with this part." His lips barely touching my ear.

I pulled back and looked at him in confusion as he smiled at me. "L-lacie. My best friend?"

He nodded.

"But, how? I was with you all night and this morning?"

He shook his head as an amused smile spread across his face, "I will explain later, for now look out your window and enjoy the view." He nodded to the window behind me.

I was so into the conversation that I didn't realize we were flying right over the west rim of The Grand Canyon. My mouth was wide open as my eyes were shining in awe at how beautiful it was in person. I could only imagine something like this before, and he made it a dream come true for me to be able experience this. I was feeling so overwhelmed with happiness that my eyes started to fill with tears, daring to spill down my cheeks. It wasn't only the fact of seeing the canyon in person, but it was the fact that he did all of this for me and went completely out of his way to ask my friend what I liked. He will never understand how much this moment truly means to me.

I planted a sweet kiss on his cheek as we flew over end of The Grand Canyon, "Thank you so much for this Jungkook."

. . .

[Jungkook's POV]

We started heading back towards the city after a 3 hour tour of all the beautiful landmarks, along with The Strip of Las Vegas. I couldn't get the image of how perfect she looked seeing The Grand Canyon out of my head and when she kissed my cheek, I swear that spot burned the remainder of the helicopter ride. I am on cloud and loving every damn second of this adventure with her and lucky for me, our day of plans is not over yet.

I surprised her with one more thing and took her to The Strat Hotel Casino SkyPod. This is where some of the world's most extreme thrill rides are located and I myself have been itching to get on them. Naturally they knew I was coming before hand, and only let so many people in to avoid the place being overcrowded.

As we got in the elevator to go up to the top floor, I could tell she was confused.

She looked at me with her eyebrows furrowed. "Are we not going to the casino?"

I shook my head, "Just hold my hand and we will be there before you know it, okay?"

I sent her a sweet smile and while returning it, she grabbed my hand nervously. "Okay."

As the doors opened, I could see the look of excitement flashing across her face, "You brought me to ride these rides??? How did you know I always wan-"

She stopped mid sentence as realization hit her. "Lacie huh?" She asked with a sly smile on her face.

"She may have also mentioned that you've always wanted to ride these as well."

She shook her head as we started walking towards the rides, riding all 3 back to back and laughing the whole time. Never would I have guessed that she would enjoy rides like this or not be afraid of heights.

This woman keeps getting more and more amazing as the days go by, I swear.

. . .

[Author's POV]

After they took the helicopter tour and rode some of the world's scariest thrill rides together, Jungkook and Olivia started to get sleepy and wanted to head back to the hotel. First before going back though, they stopped and got some snacks to take back and within 30minutes, they arrived back at the hotel.

"Hey Liv, I really want you to come back to my room so we can snuggle together and take a nap... but I want to also take you out to dinner later just the two of us. I was kind of hoping it could be like a date." He instantly turned crimson red.

"I would like that too, but I think it would be best if we went to our own rooms so you can pick me up properly for our first date later."

He quickly snapped his head up to look at her as she was already smiling. Before he realized what he was doing, he picked her up and spun her around. She giggled and laughed when suddenly the air got serious. He didn't realize the situation they were in until both of their breaths hitched and got heavier. Olivia's egs were wrapped around his waist as he held her butt in the palms of his hands. They were staring into each other's eyes, feeling the urge to have their lips on one another. She laced her fingers in the back of his soft and silky black hair, pulling him closer. Their lips then met, sharing a steamy and hot kiss inside the elevator.

When the elevator signaled they were on her floor, they broke the kiss and at each other as he put her down.

"I guess I will see you later then huh?"

"Absolutely you will." He smiled at her, waving goodbye.

Not believing what had just happened, she touched her lips softly and knew right then, that she was starting to fall in love with Jungkook.

[shroudedwoods]

I do see your vision. Increased healing? Greater durability? Faster reflexes than Sonic’s potentially? Closer to Shadow’s skills of chaos powers? Fuck yeah I see that for him! In another post far away, I discussed a bit of exactly this! Though for entirely different reasons, but still I’ll share a part of my premise here. When it comes to the chaos energy within the archie universe, it’s actually insane with its powers and abilities. I mean look at entities like Perfect Chaos, Enerjak, Feist exists???, and the documented super forms. From having increased speed, strength, invulnerability, simple feats such as that. To granting various complex wishes. Immortality. Remove life from the host. Seal away a god. Sacrifice. Fuse an ancient spirit with Chaos [Tikahaos]. Warping time and space to the point of rewriting reality entirely. 

…And Scourge has Master Emerald energy perma-trapped inside him. Ain’t no way it just turned him green with a slight boost. 

Now now, he is the Evil Sonic, if they wrote him like that, it’ll be almost impossible for the FF to get around the problem. After all, they eventually won against Scourge by tricking him to power down while the other option was an attempted gang-up on him. Though it can be argued in-universe that he’s ignorant with what he is capable of. He’s never been pushed to his limits the same way his Prime counterpart was. In every instance where he grabs power from a source, besides the added boost, he doesn’t consider the capabilities/consequences until it’s spelled out to him. 

Something that’s driven me crazy is how this mutation according to Zonic has made him a wildcard in the cosmic scheme of things. And proceeds to never elaborate what that exactly means in later issues, sighs.  

I could see him having a deeper connection to the Master Emerald than anyone else, should he pay attention. Hmm…which leads me to another question….

Do you see any negative consequences he could suffer down the line from having that much energy inside him considering…that’s not supposed to happen? 

Seen some people headcanon it’s probably why he had such a mentality switch post Master Emerald. Why he seems extra hateful. I say yeah to this too, the chaos energy might’ve drove him a little mad. Maybe even because he is originally made of anarchy energy.

Or how that energy could potentially tear him apart physically should he abuse his powers. 

What do you think? 

Okay, first, love your takes. Second,

Yeah, I agree that Scourge would be THAT much of a dumbass not to notice or even consider his new found powers. Although, he didn’t have much of a timeframe to think about it, from conquering his world to attempting to take over sonic’s to having his powers restricted in prison. The only person that (saw the power boost AND is currently still with him) is Fiona, she’s possibly the only one who would consider those options. Scourge would possibly figure them out in a accidental situation, in a fight and got a wound, suddenly it heals and it gets him thinking.

No, I haven’t previously thought about the negatives of the chaos energy, but I am interested in the idea. I guess both energies are fighting, causing problems in his body, or maybe the chaos energy slightly enhanced the obvious negatives of the Anarchy Beryll, causing scourge to be more violent and angry.

The only CANON instance in which I can see the Chaos Energy actively helping Scourge was in 191/192 where he turned super, but once he turned back, he fell to his knees and more energy than just the Anarchy Beryll was drained out of him. He later was passed out — some might say he was acting (though I disagree as I don’t see Scourge being able to put up with being carried by SONIC) — but he quickly regained consciousness, and I’ve always thought that was when the chaos energy was actively trying to restore his lost power. Which is why he was able to act quick in a fight, even if he drained of nothing literally minutes ago.

[parkminijiminie]

I want to ask your honest feeling about JK not posting anything for Jimin. He has a Tiktok Account. He could post a smfp2 or LC dance challenge. He could post a Letter photo on Weverse or write a small post on Weverse.

but he did nothing

A lot of big accounts told us to wait and see. I waited. I saw nothing.

You are the only one seeing things clearly. I really want your take on Jimin's birthday.Jimin showed us the pouch from Jin. He showed us the pancakes from Suga. He showed us the edit from Tae. RM JHope and Tae all posted for Jimin on Instagram. RM came and said Happy Birthday in person.

What happened?

I was one of those people who said, "Let's wait and see how things will play out" when that video first came out. Now, all I have to say can be summarized as "If he wanted to, he fucking would".

Let me elaborate on my thought process:

So far, the rumors about the video died down completely. Most likely, the company took care of the issues, and legal procedures are on their way. No confirmation of the identity of the person. JK said he doesn't have a girlfriend, and he wanted to focus on work for a couple of years. And that's it. Many of us waited for something big to happen in Jikook's land in light of everything, but we basically got nothing. JK is focused on his promotions, JM is doing his things. They see each other, they are on good terms but we haven't seen anything more than that. If they really were together, considering all the noise around the video, one would expect that they, especially JK, would make sure to do something to subtly show where his affections are and Jimin's birthday was the perfect opportunity for it, but alas, nothing again.

This isn't to say JK didn't congratulate him in private. In fact, he for sure did. JM himself said all the members did, but JK didn't post anything. We know JK isn't very consistent with congratulating the members on their birthdays. He had missed many such occasions before, and it isn't a big deal. Not everything should be on social media. Still, for years, he always made an exception for Jimin, and this year, he didn't. Why?

One could also argue that JK probably did something special for JM in private, besides a quick text, but we don't actually know that. Maybe he did. Maybe he didn't. From Jimin's words in his wlive, I am more inclined to think there were no special plans between the two of them. I'd wager and say each was busy through the day with his own thing, and they didn't even meet, but I could still be wrong. And yes, JK is very busy, but that doesn't really matter. When a person cares, they will find a way, especially for their partner and especially when they live in the same city. Jin did, and he is in the military ffs. And let's not forget, JM once traveled halfway through the world just to spend a few hours with JK on his birthday.

Even if I am wrong and JK actually did something for JM in private, so did all the other members, yet they still congratulated him on social media too, because they know the fans look out for it and expect it. And in the case they still hadn't done it, like with Suga, JM made sure to show what each of them did, so we would know, yet he didn't mention JK at all, other than to say he worries about him. I believe that if they really were together, no matter what, they would have done something on this day together, and we would somehow know of it, just like before in the past. All of that makes me believe there was nothing to tell or show.

All the speculations about private plans and meetings aside, I still I circle back to this question: "If JM was Jungkook's long-term partner, as people claim, would JK really not post anything, when it takes so little time, when he knows people, especially those who believe in them, are waiting for it, especially given the recent rumors about the video?". It would have been the perfect opportunity to showcase his affections for JM to the world. Given everything that recently happened, it's kind of shitty not to take this chance. Would JK be that type of boyfriend? I doubt it.

My conclusion hurts me, but it is the one that makes the most sense to me: Nothing special happened between Jikook on this day, because there is nothing more special between them. Right now, they seem to be just friends, and that's it. They love each other, they care for each other, and they have each other in their thoughts, but they are not together.

I would be more than happy to be wrong and will be the first one to admit it if new information comes up, but I won't be holding my breath.

[onlyjaeyun]

Zaidieee loveee!! How are you??? How’s your day been?? No how has your week been? I’ve never felt so attached to an author before but I’ve missed you so much is an understatement. When will you be active again?? And by active no I don’t mean your works, I mean replying to asks regularly???? I miss youuu, I need updates daily or I’ll DIE. Is there any drama? Family drama? Campus drama? Work drama? ANYTHING?? Also I have some basic questions for you

1. What’s your favorite season?

2. What’s your favorite food and drink

3. What’s your avorite place

4. What’s your favorite work of yours?

5. What’s your favorite work of someone else?

6. When’s your birthday?

7. Can we PLEASE be moots?? 😭😭

Love you Zaidie, don’t skip meals and remember to update me or I’ll srsly throw a fit 😭😭🩷

hi baby!!!!

thank you so much for the love, I deffo miss you all a lot too and am patiently waiting for the times where life's a little less hectic so I can actually find the energy to properly interact with you guys again!!!</3

atm life's been a little uninteresting, its just hectic because I feel like I keep having to do things and am mentally preparing myself for the semester which starts next week :// but besides that everything's been okay, im just very exhausted from constant social interaction and am genuinely craving a day where im just by myself doing nothinggg </3

to answer your questions!

im an autumn girly all the way!!! I love spring too but autumn is usually the perfect temperature and I love the whole transition to winter!!!!

I love lasagna and sushi!! my fave drinks are anything bitter lemon related lmao

favorite place is deffo my bed im not even trying to be corny or whatever I just love spending time in my bed lol

that question is always so difficult but ive recently resisted my old blogs and one big fave is a fanfic called "what you deserve" which I wrote for an anime character (tooth oikawa from haikyuu!!) which isn't up anymore but it's a 10k worded old friends to lovers fix and kinda means a lot to me idk might reupload it for one of the boys !!!

I've read so much ff in the past few years ive literally forgotten about most or they're just fuzed in my head lmao but I lit love everything my moots write

September 18th!

and yes ofc!!

thank you so much for this baby, I hope youre taking care of yourself too!!!<333

[swanhookheart]

Thoughts on AI writing, the WGA strike, and ways to help

This whole post is a hot mess, but I think it communicates the point I'm trying to make so I'm gonna hit "publish" and call it a day, peeps!

In the last four years, I have worked as a writing tutor, a teaching assistant for first-year composition, an embedded tutor for ESL writing workshops, a reading partner, editor-in-chief of my school's literary magazine, and as a freelance college essay coach. I'm also a novelist (unpublished but working on it), a poet, recipient of my community college's 2021 Outstanding English Student Award, a voracious reader, and in possession of a two-year degree in Creative Writing (four-year Berkeley literature degree coming in Spring). I guess you could say I like words.

I could go on for days about all the reasons I hate ChatGPT being used as a writing aid (especially by students—ffs, pls don't make me have to report y’all for academic dishonesty; it will be a shitty experience for both of us), but here’s one I really care about: vulnerability.

As it is, ChatGPT's ability to generate prose rivals my own at about age eight (that is, it looks like a thesaurus vomited all over the page and still struggles to spell the word "fluorescent" when prompted—fuck that word, to be fair). But let's envision a world two, maybe five, years down the road where AI is capable of generating a flawless sentence. It's well-structured, the grammar checks out, everything's spelled right, and the words the algorithm has chosen work to communicate its thoughts. Even then, AI wouldn't be able to replace or compete with even the most inexperienced writers among us. Why? Because, in my opinion at least, imperfections are what make art, art.

Any time I get the urge to overthink something I've created or edit it to the point of unrecognizability (which is often; I have OCD, fam!), I like to think of this sentence in Latin:

perfectus est.

To those who have not subjected themselves to completed 2 years of Latin, this might look like it'd translate to "it is perfect", but the actual, direct translation beside the adjective "perfectus, -a, -um" in all my textbooks and dictionaries has been, instead, "finished, completed". Proper classicists can feel free to correct me here, but the original Latin doesn't seem to carry with it quite the same connotations of quality or superiority that we have in the English word "perfect", and that's low-key fucking inspirational. I think about it like this: things can be "perfect" without being flawless. They only need to be done, and "done" leaves a lot more freedom for self-expression. If just being "done" makes something "perfect", then whatever peculiarities that piece possesses are also perfect. This makes total sense in my mind, but I feel like I'm on the verge of having a stroke trying to articulate it.

Art, for me, is never about the completed piece itself. It's the quirks, it's the process, it's the slight imperfections—like finding out 14 years after starting my fantasy series that the surname of one of my main characters is slang for "severe diarrhea" but being too committed to the name at this point to change it. It's the brushstroke in a painting that doesn't quite stay in the lines or the musician’s voice cracking as they sing through an especially personal set of lyrics. Some wise person once gave me a variation of this advice, and I’ve just kind of run with it ever since: the little details in our creations we convince ourselves are flaws are, more often than not, just spaces where our humanity is seeping through. They’re not bad. They’re just instances of us, as creators, making ourselves vulnerable in the name of our craft. Whether it's in a writing workshop, therapy, school, or anywhere else, I think we all feel a bit self-conscious or even uncomfortable any time we have to share pieces of ourselves with others. Baring our souls is scary. But I like to think humans are generally good at heart, and the kinds of things they typically have to say in response to these instances are designed to enhance the bits of humanity they find in our works, rather than erase or destroy them. So, making choices as artists that force us to feel vulnerable and get us out of our comfort zone because we think we’re “not doing it right” are not just welcome experiences to those intent on growing, but essential. And AI cannot do that. It can't feel, it can't think, and so these moments of vulnerability never occur. The opportunity to generate real, human connection has been lost.

The human brain is a remarkable thing. It’s "trained", as it were (in the same way ChatGPT is trained), to think the way it does not just because it's consumed a lot of other people's material, but because it's experienced a lot in its own right. We've all experienced love, we've mourned, we’ve endured trauma, we’ve laughed to the point of tears, we've left the fucking TV remote in the refrigerator again dammit, and all of these things affect how we relate to the world and to certain topics we may write about. We’re not even touching on how neurodivergence and other brain stuff can further change how we experience life; there’s even more variety to be found when factors like that are taken into account, but I'm not trying to write a dissertation here. As the products of all these influences, our brains make very intentional choices when we write (even when it feels like we're just slapping stuff on a page and hoping it sticks). The formal features of our prose are all going to be dependent on a combination of things we’ve done, felt, and read.

I mean, I guess some might want to use the Infinite Monkey Theorem (the idea that, if you leave infinite monkeys with infinite typewriters for an infinite amount of time, they will inevitably produce a finite number of texts, including the Complete Works of William Shakespeare, an infinite number of times) to argue that writing is actually more formulaic than artistic and so maybe utilizing these algorithms is totally fine. I guess the algorithm is being compared to infinite monkeys here. I don’t know. I’ve gotten hungry since sitting down to write this silly blog post and so I’m getting a little distracted. But humans aren’t alive an infinite amount of time, and the brevity of our existence necessitates a certain urgency in what and how we write—an urgency that leads us to conclude it’s better our work be flawed but out there than faultless but stuck inside our heads. So we write. We write good shit, we write bad shit, we buy a copy of Scrivener or MS Word, we join Tumblr dot com and publish all kinds of silly memes and dick jokes, and we get a world full of funky, crazy, chaotic art that reflects our funky, crazy, chaotic selves. Our humanity seeps out with every word we commit to paper, and we let it because it’s better to live in a world filled with jagged edges and mismatched hues than it is to live in one created by something that is literally fucking incapable of feeling.

You might think this is a great blog post. You might think it's garbage. You’re valid either way. But AI couldn't have written it. It’s full of tiny little pieces of me that just kinda slipped their way in as I was writing. It’s not super polished. It’s a bit all over the place because oh my god I’m craving a cookie but want to finish writing this before I leave my desk to go and get one. No matter what anyone’s thoughts are on my particular voice, though, I think we can all agree that it exists. It exists because I write often—daily, if I can—and because I feel, I think, I am. Those things come through, and they’re what make this a semi-coherent (I hope) blog post as opposed to a smattering of random words ChatGPT probably couldn’t define for you at gunpoint. Whatever you think about this post, AI couldn’t have written it and that’s the point.

This is just one of the reasons why I support the WGA strike and will continue to do so for as long as it takes the union to get the deal they deserve. I am not and will likely never be a member of this union, but the work they’re doing with this strike to push back against AI and its wildfire-like proliferation across creative industries is essential. Algorithms simply cannot do the work that humans do—not today, not ever. Not because they’re not advanced enough, but because vulnerability is what make art, art. Connecting with other human beings—which is all any of us ever really hope to do with our art anyway—requires that vulnerability.

I’m just some random dweeb on the internet, seeing marginalized workers struggle because a bunch of crappy billionaires don't want to come to the table and feeling like shouting some words into the void about it. Maybe nobody will see this post, and that’s okay. But maybe they will and I can do some good with it. I haven’t got a lot of money to help (I’m in my broke college student era). But donations to the Entertainment Community Fund are being accepted and these funds go back into the hands of union (WGA and SAG-AFTRA) members as hardship funds if they need financial help during the work stoppage—this is my understanding, at least; pls correct me if I’m wrong!

Link below:

If you can’t donate, please reblog. I know it would mean a lot to me if I were in their position.

[dollivication]

So glad to hear you fuck with Tseng and Rufus :3 Now time for the scenarios I'd like to share.

For Tseng, this man definitely likes hair pulling, change my mind! Whether he's pulling yours or your pulling his, he loves it :3 He especially loves it when you pull his... It's probably one of the few ways to actually get something more than a quiet moan out of him because this man is not that noisy! He keeps up the professionalism even in bed and it's your job to get him to put that shit down. You're at home, damnit, stop acting all professional and workaholic! Of course, he's not entirely against office sex ;) Expect him to call you and hide you under his desk to blow him while he works! He's good at masking his emotions when others are around despite how much you tease him. But tease him enough and the first moment he gets alone with you, he's taking his chance and bending you over his desk! To me, he's much more methodical with how he fucks you, finding out what makes YOU feel greatest before he focuses on himself after he makes you cum a few times :3

As for Rufus... This man, while he acts dominant, is definitely a switch under the right circumstances. He can tell people to go away when he wants, he's literally in charge (or going to be in charge, depending on when in the timeline we're talking) of the whole company, so people kinda gotta listen to him, which is perfect when he wants alone time with you! He'll fuck you whenever and wherever he wants; he's one of the most powerful people in the world, so of course he gets what he wants when he wants it! He'll fuck you at home, in his office, in a closet, etc. He's definitely much more into rough sex that focuses more on his pleasure, so expect to be straight up used! Don't worry, he'll let you cum a couple times, besides, he's never able to get enough! However, if you come to him with a strap on and a promise, he may give you a chance ;) Make him feel good enough and he may let it become a regular occurrence!

Of course, since Tseng usually isn't far from Rufus being his right hand man and all, you can expect having threesomes often with the two ;) Either sucking one while the other fucks you or having them both fuck you at the same time, they both will have their way with you, usually in one of their offices or a secluded closet, whichever is closest :3

That's pretty much what plagues our mind with these two! We absolutely love them so much-

-🐉

🐉non…. oh NY GOSHHDGHGFS IM TWEAKI NGG IM GWEAKING IM PACING AROUSN MY CAGE I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO EXPRESS THE AMOUT OF JOY I FEEL RIGJT NOW

THATS IT RHATS IT IM GGETTING INTO FF IM GOINGTO READ LORE ILL DO IT I NEED THEM IMMEDIATELY ASAP RUFUS AND TSENG YOU WILL BE DEALT WITH

[gay-jesus-probably]

OP, your MIND.

I mean, in all fairness I really do understand how Zelda wound up going along with Rauru and Sonia's bullshit in canon, it's just... not a nice story. Cause she's had a really rough life; I mean ffs, she lost her mom when she was little, her dad was abusive, she spent most of her formative years standing in a fucking pond praying at a rock (and canonically almost killed herself by overdoing it when she was little), and she spent a solid century as an immaterial existence holding back the apocalypse, then came out to find that the kingdom was still destroyed and almost everyone she'd ever loved was dead. That in of itself is a lot, BUT we also pair that with Zelda being extremely priviledged - she has spent her entire life being told that she is fundamentally Better than everyone around her, she is the most important person in the room at any given moment, and she alone has the divine authority to rule over the entire world. And because of the Calamity, now suddenly she doesn't have her castle, her kingdom, her servants, her soldiers, and (if we ignore canon turning every character into a flat caricature) she no longer has any of her status. She's just some random teenager, why the fuck would anyone consider her to be a figure of authority worth respecting?

So that's the place Zelda's in when she gets yeeted into the past. Then she's found by her distant ancestors, who immediately adopt her as their own daughter, and they shower her with all the love, affection and support she never got. People are listening to her again, she's treated with respect, she's back to her old lifestyle of being royalty in a castle full of servants... it's like a dream come true for her. Sure, Sonia and Rauru can be a bit... insensitive sometimes, but it's a different time period, maybe things work differently now. And Zelda knows that Hyrule is meant to be a single, united kingdom, because she remembers everything being perfect before the Calamity; she certainly never heard of any non-hylians feeling opressed. And besides, Rauru and Sonia are so nice, how could they be actually mistreating anyone? Everyone who says they're monsters must be lying, or they did something to deserve it.

...Basically I see the canon story in TOTK to be Zelda being groomed into facism, because she's traumatized, lonely, and has some flawed beliefs about the world, and that makes it really easy for her to be radicalized by people that show her love and support. That's how it happens in real life; people rarely go down these rabbit holes out of hatred, they do it because they're lonely, they want a community, and here's a bunch of seemingly nice people that have easy answers for all their problems.

ANYWAYS so while I do understand why TOTK Zelda ended up the way she did, I would fucking love a fic where she didn't just brush off the red flags, but instead took them as the warning sides and started pulling back. That would also give her a real character arc tbh, because she just straight up doesn't have one in the game (that we get to see at least). In this setting, Zelda starts the game by genuinely believing Sonia and Rauru were great heroes who founded a perfect kingdom in peace and harmony; Hyrule existing is this amazing moment of joy. And then she gets yeeted back in time to the actual founding, and has to instead learn that history is a lot messier than that, the story she was taught was extremely biased to favour the Hylian royal family, and she needs to choose if she wants to hide the past sins so she can keep benefiting from them, or try to make things right but destroy any chance of her having the life she always thought she'd have. Not to mention the dilema between her siding with Sonia and Rauru, people who genuinely love and care for her but don't care all that much about anyone else, vs Ganondorf, a man who treats her with suspicion and hostility (and doesn't particularly like her even after he does trust her), but cares a hell of a lot about his people, and the good of the world as a whole. The easy path means having a loving family, a safe home, the lifestyle she's used to, and the certainty of knowing who she is, but to get it she needs to turn a blind eye to people suffering. Meanwhile the harder path gives her no promise of friendship or support, a difficult and dangerous life, and means having to face the guilt of knowing everything she's ever believed was a lie to hide the atrocities of her ancestors... but it's the right thing to do.

Now that's a fucking character arc.

me: what if we subverted the imperialism trope with zelda realizing that rauru is the aggressor in the equation because 100 years is not enough time to wash away her diplomatic skills and she just knows that the gerudo people would not be hostile if not for a justifiable reason. sure, it takes a while for her to gain ganondorf's trust just based on her association with rauru and sonia, but he does end up trusting her somewhere down the line and fills her in on what's happening. she's absolutely horrified. as a result, she works alongside ganondorf to seal away rauru by gathering the sages and convincing them to protect their respective domains from conquest. but here's the twist: what if link still gets mentored by rauru's spirit at the beginning, and thinks rauru is a benevolent king? imagine zelda's last words to him in the final memory, nothing but a frenzied "link, do not trust the king of darkness!" but he doesn't know which king: ganondorf or rauru, because the gloom has corrupted ganondorf's body and rauru, who had unsettled him since the beginning. but then he realizes it's rauru, and it's deliciously ironic since rauru's power is light but as always, every light has a shadow.

totk enjoyers: hold my beer i'm gonna fucking crucify a korok