#berty

[lampcry]

magma sketches

[pommur]

Simon and Betty genderbend be like:

Simone when giving birth: Just put my hand on your face my sweet prince, it’ll be the last thing I’ll ever feel.

Berty: Honey, the baby is already out. Your holding her…

Simone: … I just crammed another human being out of my clown hole for you. Let me be dramatic! *pouts*

Berty: Okay, okay. What ever you want, sweetie. *takes her hand and sets it on his face* *has the desire to say their inside joke of ‘don’t be a wimp’ which he frequently tells her but would never say it during such an event*

Simone: Aren’t you gonna say the thing, Berty? *sweaty and looks like she’s going to cry*

Berty softly: Oh, honey. Don’t cry, don’t be a wimp.

Simone: *sniffles* I love you. *happy but emotionally charged crying*

Hospital Staff: *angrily stares at Berty*

Berty: … I swear I’m not picking on her. Well not today… I would die for her… Please don’t kick me out. *is nervous*

Simone after squeezing out their child:

Berty after all the nurses start glaring at him:

[h1nanii]

Minors dni 🌞

They just love killing everyone with the biggest dick

Like everyone who reaches the height of 6’+ ft has to die.

Most of em were probably virgins too like atleast give them some 🐱 first (preferably mine😋😋) 😓

But maybe not porco, bro seems like the type to go to a brothel/ strip club during his free time and get all the bitches on him cause he’s an honorable marleyan ☠️

Poor Berty with that fuck ass haircut had to last only 3 seasons(not if u count s1 part 2 and s3 part 2) but yeah Yk he woulda been whimpering and all of he wasn’t so whipped for Annie (I am too Ngl).

Erwin coulda had some pussy if he wasn’t so buried for his dreams(quite literally 🪦) but now that I think about it…. Didn’t he get his bitch taken by his friend back when he was a cadet or something? Poor guy.

Mike/miche was gone too fucking soon

Y’all remember what Doja said right? Exactly. Imagine riding that bigass nose of his😍 (I need help) he had good character too💔💔

[lindholmline]

since bert’s contract is in the works…

[akiwitch]

Hello!! I'd like to know more about the very small toad.

the VERY SMALL TOAD.

Bertrand was a librarian, ages ago, before the library was sealed up and disappeared. When he was reawakened, he wasn't anywhere near his body (and probably didn't want to be) and ended up in the only available nearby vessel - the body of a very small toad.

Berty is funny, knowledgeable, and a loyal friend. He's also PURPLE and ADORABLE.

And the best boy. The absolute top he/him. There are only two he/him characters in the whole book but he's the best by far.

OURPLE

Also part of his first appearance because it's funny and I love him.

Bertrand glanced down at himself. He was a dark purple, with lighter purple markings, speckled with gold. “A type of harlequin toad, if I’m not mistaken. Am I mistaken? I don’t know how versed you are on amphibians.” “Does that really matter right now?” Andi asked. “Well, several species of harlequin toads are poisonous, so it probably matters—“ Andi dropped him with a squeak and wiped her hand on her skirt. “Hey! That was extremely rude.” Bertrand righted himself. “You can’t just drop a person! Who taught you manners?” “You just said you could be poisonous,” Andi shot back. “Let’s start over, I believe we got off on the wrong foot,” Bertrand said. “Particularly the one that you were going to use to step on me.”

[kettykika78]

I absolutely had to see Sherlock and John walking through the streets of an Umbrian village with my own eyes after reading this perfect fic by Berty @bertytravelsfar . Not having time for a drawing, I made a quick photomontage. The photo used is not mine but by F.Gariazzo, you can see it and other photos of the village of Corciano at this link (it seems the perfect place for this story).

Please, give yourself a gift and go read this fic immediately.

And I want to add a moodboard, with Corciano, a Raffaello's paint of S Caterina that could be the one in the story, and their menu of tagliere di affettati, and a Bacio in all its chocolate glory.

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/V1JAocC

by Berty

Italy in the springtime is as romantic as it gets but is it enough to free unspoken words and feelings after years of silence?

Words: 9503, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Sherlock (TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes, Original Characters

Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson

Additional Tags: Italy, World Travel, It’s For a Case, Declarations Of Love, Restaurants, Spring

@totallysilvergirl @raggedyblue @fluffbyday-smutbynight @helloliriels @raggedyblue @inevitably-johnlocked @ineffableuser @johnlockismyreligion @topsyturvy-turtely @imnova

[swissmissficrecs]

Word count: 9,503 Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Sherlock (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes, Original Characters Additional Tags: Italy, World Travel, It's For a Case, Declarations Of Love, Restaurants, Spring, Boys Kissing, Mentioned Mrs Hudson, Alternate Timelines, No Reichenbach here! Summary:

Italy in the springtime is as romantic as it gets but is it enough to free unspoken words and feelings after years of silence?

======

Rec: I wasn’t sure what to expect from the summary and tags, but this is a casefic set several years -- perhaps a decade or even more -- after Sherlock and John met, when they are still working and living together, not estranged as the “years of silence” might suggest. There is no reference to major canon events (Reichenbach, Mary, etc.) but it could still be read as taking place some time after series 4, without mention of Rosie.

So, having said all that, this is just a beautiful, gentle story that basically brings these two full circle in a mirror image of their night at Angelos. All with gorgeous descriptions that transport the reader right into the midst of these enchanting surroundings.

A reflective, restorative, resplendent feast for the heart and the senses.

[bertynghiem]

[willietheguy]

Ya’ll kill me 😂😂😂

[stillenmunkes]

Stalking von Berty

Berty: Du dummes Arschloch. Beny: Wie bitte!? Berty: Ich hasse Dich! Beny: Redest Du mit Deinem Spiegelbild? Berty: Ich will nichts mehr mit Dir zu tun haben!!! Beny: Na, dann schreib mir doch nicht und lasse mich in Ruhe! Berty: (Nach Monaten voller Beleidigungen) Ich liebe Dich immer noch, sollen wir uns nicht mal treffen!? Beny: Spinnst Du? Nä, Du schuldest mir noch 8000 Euro. Berty: Träum weiter... .... be continue

[lithiumseven]

Jeeves and Wooster as incorrect quotes

Screen caps by @bluebassy

[thesunsethour]

imagine bitches in 2004 tuning into hugh laurie’s new show after two decades of watching him almost exclusively play loveable village idiots

[beingjellybeans]

Discover Birch Tree's 'Cowmustahan!': Nurturing Kids Through Fun Lessons

Birch Tree Fortified Choco understands the importance of creating meaningful connections and instilling valuable life lessons in children in today’s fast-paced world. To meet this goal, they are delighted to introduce “Cowmustahan!” – a captivating YouTube series that seamlessly blends entertainment and wisdom, all while sipping on a glass of delicious Birch Tree Fortified Choco. Join this…

[shittywriterbrain]

[starlightseraph]

he’s so silly - part 2/?

[bertiblogxiv]

'Refusal of the Call' is a narrative trope where-