#ben might be a little rocky but i think he could turn himself into a good husband if he wanted to

[wildsaltair]

I am a Maximus sun, John Biebe moon, Egan rising

[ofcatnaps-moved]

the island is a lot of things, but ultimately, it’s been home to him for long enough he knows when something near him shifts even without having to delve into the Force to prod it & find out what it might be. that’s how he had known of the Falcon landing even before he had laid eyes on it. still, it’s not his father of his uncle who had emerged from it & that had set him on edge enough. had they found him? he’d hidden himself away here, trusting his uncle to root out the disturbances they had both felt the night the temple was destroyed, & his mother had known of long, long before. if someone else was piloting the Falcon... 

he’s been mostly on his own here, with only his continued training & personal drive to keep him in balance but he’s never felt truly alone. the planet had been the birthplace of the Jedi Order for a reason, & the Force was strong on its deepest levels. he feels connected to all things, able to hide so deeply within it that no other being might find him even as strong as he is. still, he’d remained detached just in case. when weeks had turned to months to years, the only thing giving him hope was that it meant his family was still safe & he wasn’t needed yet. 

he’s at the top of the mountain - Temple Island, the hidden structure on the rocky islands dotting the vast ocean - & from here he can see the small party that had disembarked from the ship. at least he recognized Chewie & the Wookie was a welcome face if nothing else. the Droid looks familiar in a sense, but that could just be its model. he’s learned not to read too deeply or trust in paint jobs, after all. he lets the saber ease from her grip & slide into his hand, feeling its familiar weight & heft before he makes a face. ‘ and did they tell you why I was here? ’ why isn’t Luke here with you? why send for me now?  (@affcgato / moved for beta)

the man that stood before her was, in rey's opinion, a giant. he was broader than two of herself and she was sure he'd have given even chewie a run for his money in how tall he stood - okay, maybe not, and she would be able to see the wookiee in comparison to him once she'd managed to convince him she wasn't some random idiot who stole the falcon and then tracked him down to... wherever they were. standing before him, rey closed her eyes for a long moment and felt the strength of the force around them - she had felt a touch of it the moment she'd stepped foot on the soil, but she was still so new to all of this, she didn't exactly know what to make of it.

an almost shy but much more awkward grimace scrunched up her face a little and she released her hold on the legacy saber that had been given to her as a way to prove she was who she claimed. ❝ some of it. not enough, if i'm being honest. they said that you were hiding from the first order, that you were the hope for the resistance. i'm-i'm rey. master luke and general leia wanted me to come to you because they think you might be able to help me figure out what my role in all this is. ❞

the chirps and beeps from r2d2 briefly distracted her, and rey turned over her shoulder to pull a face at the droid. ❝ i don't think you should say that to the general's son, r2. he's supposed to be helping us and offending him right off the bat isn't going to get us anywhere fast. ❞ with her nose scrunched, she turned back to ben and this time offered her hand in greeting. ❝ what i was trying to say is that i'm nobody, but somehow i ended up mixed up with the resistance and your mother and uncle said they sensed i would play a part. i was taken by the first order and managed to escape by using this force thing, and now they're trying to keep the resistance together while i come get you so you can help, i think. honestly, i tried to tell them that i wasn't the best choice to come get you since we'd never met, but they seemed to disagree. ❞

[tennessoui]

FeralObi anon here. How do you come up with these so fast?? Are you an infinite number of ideas and worlds in human-shaped form? I love both of those ideas. The first one kills me tho, Obi gets his first kind touch in years from lil Anakin. Also you can have lil Anakin coming home one day with a skulking, snarling nonverbal murder puppy and saying brightly, "He followed me home, can I keep him?" Schmi thinks this is definitely worse than the time he brought a krayt dragon home.

ah! hello! yes this is the first idea of a feral obi-wan who meets anakin when he's still on tatooine. i will also still do the second idea because like. i liked them equally as much rip me

but i told myself these were going to both be very short snippets and instead this one is uh 2k so i'll post the second one tomorrow instead of tonight!

(ficlet where obi-wan is captured by pirates/unspecified forces at a young age and then tortured for a decade before he escapes to tatooine when anakin is like 6. obi-wan, after a decade of torture is....not alright in this fic though he's only here at the end) (2k)

Shmi had known that when she sent her little Anakin away to follow after the stern-faced, warm-eyed Jedi Master, that this would not be the last time she ever saw her boy. She couldn’t explain how she knew, just as she had not been able to explain how she became pregnant, but she knew beyond a doubt that one day, she would see her little boy back in her arms.

She just hadn’t known it would be so soon.

“He died, Master Jinn died,” Anakin mumbles into the front of her dress, unwilling to move his head far back enough from her hug that he could talk clearly. “On Naboo. And the stupid Jedi council refused to train me even after I was so amazing in the air. Mom, I destroyed a blockade! Entirely! And they wouldn’t--they didn’t--” his little face scrunches up and then he’s bawling into his hands.

A slave, a born slave, knows intrinsically the injustice of the galaxy. It is not often they know hope.

“Oh my boy,” she whispers, smoothing a hand over the top of his head. She has questions. She has so many questions about everything he’s just said and what those strangers have put her son through, but the most important thing is a question she cannot wait until he has cried himself out to ask. “Is your chip gone, Ani? Did they remove your transmitter?”

Because she had sent him away from her so that he could be free. And that had been her own twisted version of hope, that her son could know a life she never would again. If the Jedi masters had proven to be just like every other master in the world, she would find herself sobbing into her own hands.

“Yeah,” Anakin sniffles and wipes at his ruddy cheeks, pulling back a few steps. “They removed it and everything. And--”

He pauses and drops his satchel to the ground in front of her. “They gave me credits. To buy you. For my trouble.”

He spits out the last three words like they’re the most disgusting thing in the entire world. As if Shmi’s freedom isn’t laying at their feet, mere centimeters away.

“Republic credits are no good here,” she hears herself say faintly.

“Padme, the handmaiden you met, she talked to the queen about me I guess,” Anakin mumbles, kicking his feet. “And when the queen learned that the Jedi didn’t want me even after all that, Padme says the queen says I’ll always have a place on Naboo. Me and my family. And then she took the Jedi credits and gave me these instead. It should be enough, Mom.”

Shmi sits down on the floor. With shaking hands, she opens the bag and looks inside. Yes. Yes.

There’s more than enough.

There’s enough to buy her freedom and take her boy away from Mos Espa. There’s enough to take her boy away from Tatooine completely.

“I…” she says. “Ani, I…”

“Padme said she’d send a ship for us,” Ani reports as if their lives are not changing right in front of their eyes. “In two days ‘cause I told her it might take a little bit of time to get Ben to come with us. But we can’t leave without him.”

This is said fiercely and with his arms crossed tightly over his little chest.

Shmi stares at him.

“I’ve already left him once!” Anakin says, stomping his foot. “But that was okay, because I knew you would bring him food and water and stuff. But if we’re both gone, no one’s going to be there for him.”

Shmi bites at her lip. There’s a lot of things happening very quickly right now, and she doesn’t know how to process half of them.

Her son has come back, after only being gone for a week and a half.

He has apparently either endeared himself so much to the queen of Naboo that she was willing to give him the money necessary to buy his mother from slavery and also promise him sanctuary on her planet. He says he’s done this by single-handedly ending a blockade, which is something she just cannot even think about right now.

He has told this queen--queen--that he will gladly live on Naboo with his family. Yes. Alright.

His family seems to include his imaginary friend, Ben.

Anakin has been talking about Ben for years now, ever since he was six and a half years old and sent by Watto to retrieve any scraps he could from what looked to be a crashed pod in the Wastelands. She’d let him ramble on about the ghost of a friend, because she’d known it to be something all children go through and experience. She hadn’t thought Anakin a lonely child, not with the friends he made in Mos Espa, but she’d always known that Anakin had a wandering spirit, ill-suited for Tatooine. If he liked to imagine an older man from a strange world hiding in the caves of the Wastes, then she wasn’t going to say anything.

“You have been leaving him food, haven’t you, Mom?” Anakin asks, almost accusatory. “I told him to expect you and everything.”

No. Shmi has not been traveling to the edge of the Wastelands every day during her precious few hours of free time in order to leave food to be picked apart by womp rats and desert critters and not her boy’s imaginary friend.

“Ani,” she says cautiously, quietly, “we cannot...we won’t be able to bring Ben with us when we go.”

Anakin, predictably, does not react well. “Why not!” he yells, backing away from her even further and looking as if she is the enemy. “Padme’s fine with it!”

“Aren’t you a little old for imaginary friends?” Shmi asks desperately, feeling cold suddenly even though the heat of the mid-morning sun has not abated at all.

If anything, her son looks more offended. “He’s not imaginary! Saying...saying that he’s not coming with us...is...is a bunch of poodoo!”

“Anakin!” Shmi gasps.

“Come on,” her boy says forcefully, grabbing at her hand and tugging her towards the door. She gets on her feet reluctantly and has half a mind to pull back just because he needs to learn that this sort of behavior is not okay, war hero or not. “We’re going to buy you from Watto. And then we’re going to go visit Ben!”

---

Buying her freedom takes less time than Shmi Skywalker ever thought it would. It feels distant as well, as if it’s happening to someone else.

It doesn’t help that her Ani is impatient and surly by turn, spilling the coin out onto Watto’s counter and barely waiting for him to finish counting it before he’s looking at the price of renting a four-person speeder parked outside.

“You won’t survive out there on your own,” Watto sneers, even as he’s passing her the kill-switch of her own slave chip. “Days. It’ll be days until the Hutts find out there’s a newly freed slave with no connections out there in the open. Ripe for the pickin’.”

Watto doesn’t have to tell her any of this. She knows. Gods, does she know.

But Anakin seems so sure about possessing the favor of the Queen of Naboo, or at least her handmaiden, which might be close enough to the same thing. She thanks Watto--she thanks him and then doesn’t even know why--and meets Anakin outside.

He’s bouncing around the speeder, little hands clutching his satchel to his chest. “Good!” he says when he sees her, hopping onto the machine and putting the parcel between his feet. “I got Ben something called a fig on Naboo, but I don’t know how long it’ll take for it to go bad. Apparently they’re sweet.”

Shmi goes along with it. Shmi doesn’t know why she goes along with it, but she does. She can see this is important to her boy, and though she’d rather spend the afternoon and early evening saying goodbye to her friends, she will allow Ani to say goodbye to his imaginary friend. Maybe she’ll even talk to it. “Hi, hello, I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed the imaginary blue milk and delicacies I’ve left out for you this past week and half. Oh no, it was no bother. My son insisted.”

The ride is quick--Anakin has always been a driver to push the limits of any engine he comes across--and before she knows it, he’s dismounting on a piece of desert and rock that look exactly the same as the last four pieces of rocky terrain they’ve past.

“Ben!” Ani calls, satchel clutched firmly in his hands as he makes his way deeper into the crevices of the landscape. “Ben, it’s Ani! I’m really sorry that I left! Ben? Ben! I’m back now! Ani’s back!”

It’s actually...quite pathetic, to watch her boy speak so pleadingly to the cold stone faces of the rocks around them, but if this is what he needs to do to say goodbye to his life on Tatooine, Shmi won’t say a word.

“Ben--” Anakin draws in a breath to call again, but then there’s movement out of the corner of Shmi’s eyes, and something jumps from the rock down to land on her boy.

She screams and darts forward, but the thing on top of her son snarls at her in guttural warning.

“No, Ben,” Ani coos, stroking at the face that yes, is human, now that it’s not in unnaturally fast motion. “That’s my mom, Ben.”

Ben--Ben??--growls anyway, pinning the boy--her boy--beneath him with his legs and arms.

“She’s fine,” Ani murmurs gently, one hand reaching up to stoke over the beginnings of a beard on Obi-Wan’s face “Oh Ben, I’m sorry.”

The man on top of Shmi’s child finally looks away from her and at her boy, which is both better and worse.

“Ani,” Ben drawls out, as if the word--or perhaps forming the word--hurts him.

Anakin is happy. Shmi can tell he’s happy without even being able to see much of him. It’s like the very air vibrates with his joy. “Yes!” her son says. “Ani. Ben.” He taps the man’s chest. “Ben. Ani.”

The man buries his head into Anakin’s hair, hands rubbing up and down his sides and his arms and his face.

Shmi needs to say something, wants to say something about this strange man touching boy like he owns him, but the memory of his growl and the flash of his golden eyes stops her from stepping forward.

“Anakin, get away from him,” she hisses instead of stepping forward and tearing the stranger off of her son. She has the distinct feeling Anakin wouldn’t let Ben go anywhere, not with the way his little hands are holding so tight to the man’s shoulders. The man’s shoulders that are covered with one of her old tunics that Anakin had told her became unsalvageable after its last wash.

“No,” Anakin says, tightening his hold on his...friend. “He says you didn’t give him food the entire time I was gone! He’s hungry.”

Shmi thinks there’s a very good possibility that this Ben is going to eat her, but she knows not to say anything of the sort. Not when it’s two against one.

“He hasn’t said anything!” She cries instead.

Anakin huffs at this and pats at the feral’s head. “Maybe not to you, but he talks to me.”

Shmi stares at him and wonders if there’s something she’s supposed to be doing or saying here. The man won’t allow her to tear him off her child, she knows that automatically. But she can’t--she doesn’t know--

“Anakin,” she tries, desperately.

But Anakin doesn’t even look at her, too busy petting over the man, who has at least allowed him to sit up. “Hey, I’m sorry, I thought she would,” he tells him in an undertone. “I really thought she would, but I’m back now. I’m not going anywhere without you again--”

He extends his hand and Ben presses his cheek against it with enough force that it pushes him back slightly.

“You’re coming to Naboo with us, Ben,” Anakin promises, clutching at the ends of the man’s long hair. “Or I’m not going at all.”

To Shmi, it sounds like a threat.

The way her son’s eyes flash an unfamiliar golden color makes her feel cold as a Tatooine night. She shivers, but no one notices.

[siennahrobek]

Warning - This is long

Chapter 11 – Saudade

Future Past

18 BBY

Luke is One year old

“Well, this is it. This is now my life,” Obi-Wan said, standing in the middle of his little hut, in the middle of the desert. There was nothing here, just sand and rock and bones. It would have been nice, a quiet place to meditate, if there wasn’t the looming threat of the empire, or the grief of losing the entirety of his people or the oppressive twin suns of the planet.

Perhaps if he left now, he could catch up with the resident herd of banthas. The nomadic life sounded fairly appealing at the moment.

“You know, when I said I wanted to just spend some time meditating in a cave, this is not what I meant,” he pointed out to the air. He wasn’t actually talking to anyone, he didn’t think anyone had even been listening. After all, he really was by himself.

“I’d say it is nicer than a cave.”

Until now, Obi-Wan’s old master didn’t really make casual conversation so his appearance, or rather, voice coming from thin air was a bit on the unexpected side. Their talks were mostly of the teaching variety.

He wondered what changed.

Perhaps it was him.

Maybe he was going crazy, and Master Jinn had to do something rather desperate so Obi-Wan wouldn’t lost his mind completely. It wasn’t out of the realm of possibility.

“I think I need a hobby,” the new hermit said with a nod. Yes, that seemed right.

“Do you really think you are going insane?”

Obi-Wan scowled, glancing around as if the speaking person would appear. Qui-Gon didn’t really appear, at least not in a way that Obi-Wan could see. He just heard his voice, clear as day. Or rather, clear as crystal or water or clear things. He didn’t know. Sometimes it felt hard to think. “Don’t read my mind,” he grumbled.

“I am apparition of the Force,” the voice was flat and steady, nearly laced intricately with sarcasm. Of course. “I couldn’t read minds when I was alive, what makes you think I can do it dead?”

The physically living master huffed, loud and dramatic, waving his arms as if that would make his point. “I don’t know what ghosts can do!” he nearly shouted. It wasn’t like anyone else could hear him. Even the closest person was many, many miles away.

Obi-Wan could almost hear his former master roll his eyes and feel his sarcasm and mock distain rise. “I’m not reading your mind. I can’t do that. I just know you.”

“I have changed a lot in the past fifteen years,” he shot out.

“Not as much as you think,” Qui-Gon hummed, a bit vaguely amused. His voice had quieted, softened but it still, as always, seemed so confident, so sure of himself. Obi-Wan wondered if he naturally had that type of pride and ego or if he had gotten it somewhere. Obi-Wan could probably use some of that, he mused as Qui-Gon continued to speak. “At your core, you are still the same. A jedi. Stubborn, protective, determined, persistent, good, kind, selfless. Just as you were as a padawan.” By the end of the list, Qui-Gon had almost, perhaps, sounded a bit even fond. Obi-Wan wasn’t entirely sure if he was a good judge of what it was.

“You did not see me that way.” The words were coming out when his brain had not given permission. It hardly mattered. Talking with ghosts.

“Now look who thinks he can read minds,” Qui-Gon contemplated, unperturbed and not so offended. He sounded a bit amused, like this was so ironic. He could find humor in anything, apparently, a skill Obi-Wan thought he once had. “I was very proud of you. I am still, exceedingly, proud of you.”

“Now I know I’m hallucinating,” he scoffed.

“Is it so hard to believe, of my pride? In you of all people?”

Yes, Obi-Wan thought. Of course, it is. How can anyone be proud of what he had done, of what had happened, what he had let happen? “You told me to train the boy,” he said, his voice strained and uneasy. He shook his head and fought back tears that threatened to leap forth from his eyes. “And look how that turned out? I did, I tried, I loved him. And now all the jedi are dead. The Sith have won and the galaxy has been left in oppressing darkness.”

There was a brief silence, a contemplation of words. “That is not your fault, Obi-Wan. You are not the one to blame. His choices were his own.” Qui-Gon’s voice was kind and soft, and Obi-Wan could just barely remember the few times, even early in his apprenticeship where Qui-Gon hadn’t been completely upset and regretful with him where he used that tone. When Obi-wan had a vision, or a dream, as Qui-Gon liked to call him. When Obi-Wan was scared and there was no immediate danger to Qui-Gon’s other loved ones. The beginning of their relationship had been more than just a little rocky but that just meant their bond had grown strong through those trials. It had taken long, and it had taken work, but eventually, they made it. And they had been amazing.

“I loved him,” Obi-Wan groaned. “I did not see what he had become.”

“No one had,” Qui-Gon replied, his voice lowering. “You did so well, Obi-Wan. You tried so hard. Better than I. You praised him when called for and treated him as a person, not just a vessel for a prophecy of old. You are not perfect, padawan mine, no one is. But this is not your fault.”

“I do not know why he did it,” Obi-Wan confessed, shaking his head at the truth. He didn’t know and he wondered why every day. Was his love not enough? “I continue to be blind when it comes to him.”

“The dark ide obscures so much, even of which is nearest to us,” Qui-Gon continued, in that teaching voice where Obi-Wan understood and didn’t understand at all. It was an odd thing to miss, he knew, but he did, all the same. “How can one see when something so beyond your control blocks it so thoroughly?”

The younger and not so dead master buried his face in his hands. “It is all gone now.”

“You aren’t. Hope isn’t.”

“Luke is alive,” Obi-Wan agreed. “Leia is alive. They…they are…”

“Hope,” Qui-Gon finished. “Not just for the galaxy either. They are hope for you.”

11 BBY

Luke is eight/nine years old

“Ben?”

He was sleeping on the floor again, Luke thought to himself as he padded out of his room and into the main part of the ship. The boy wasn’t entirely sure why. There was plenty of room with him in the little area Ben had designated for him. For Luke. He had his own room back on Tatooine with Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru and it had been a lot bigger than this, but he didn’t mind. He found the smaller areas kind of cozy actually.

He had not slept well since Ben had come to take him away, after Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru went cold. At first, he had even tried to stay up, like Ben. But Ben must have some kind of superpower or something because no matter what he did, Luke could not stay up. He could not stay awake. Nightmares often plagued his sleeping times. And hyperspace was cold.

Ben looked up, his bleary gaze softening upon spotting Luke, and he moved himself into a seated position. “Are you alright?”

The child hugged himself, wrapping his arms around his torso in some kind of substitute for Ben’s cloak. He didn’t really want to admit to bad dreams. Surely almost being nine, was an age where he could deal with them. He shouldn’t be scared.

Ben, of course, knew anyways.

It was so wizard, the way he just knew things. Biggs was probably right; he must actuallybe a wizard.

“Nightmares?” Ben mused when Luke didn’t answer. “Dreams pass in time.”

Luke just nodded even though he didn’t really understand.

“But, I suppose, that is not so comforting in the moment, is it?” he hummed and stood up, his joints making gross cracking noises as he did. “Come, I will make you some tea. I have a blend that might help.”

Luke perked but tried to temper his excitement and interest. It had only been a week since Ben introduced him to the wonder and ability of tea. It’s warmth and ability to fight the cold of hyperspace. A week since Luke declared he wanted to try all of them.

It was a start.

The tea Ben gave him tasted different than the first one. Physically even warmer, something more soothing. It was calming and it felt like his heart and head were slowing down. It was not long until his eyes started to droop. And then, suddenly, it was like sleep felt like a good idea. He didn’t fear it as much or the nightmares.

He trusted Ben.

And if Ben said the tea would help, Luke would believe him.

Ben didn’t lie to him.

Afterwards, he led Luke back to his bunk and started to tuck him in, bringing blankets up his torso to his neck. Luke just tugged at the billowing sleeve of his robe, attempting to pull him down with him. Ben thought he was trying to get his attention. “Yes, Luke?”

“Stay with me?” he pleaded.

The older man hesitated but exhaled and nodded. “Okay, beacon. Okay.”

6 BBY

Luke is eleven years old.

“Alright Luke,” Ben smiled warmly, filling his presence with kindness and love, as much as he could imbue. The boy next to him, barely a mop of blonde hair visible, grinned and snuggled close to his side, curling even more under his large robe. He would have to get another one, Ben mused to himself. Luke was growing bigger every day and he seemed to really like hiding underneath there. Ben would have to compensate in the size of his robes as he grew.

They were on planet side and even spending a few nights there as of the moment. Stopping for supplies was often frequent and short. Usually if Ben was lucky, he could get a small job or do some things for people that would help him get resources, food or fuel. This planet, however, it had turned out, it was monsoon season and for the next few days, no one could even manage to get to or off the ground.

Ben had scrounged up enough credits to pay for a decent – but quite small – room, to wait out the worst of the storm. It was loud and the harsh semi-solid rain pounded against the roof and walls, wailing in some sort of sad and grieving song. It was a bit frightening to the youngster, but Ben was a bit amazed on the comfort Luke could find within Ben’s presence and at his side.

“We have quite some time to burn, and not a lot to do,” he offered, lightly, curling the blankets around them further and making sure the pillows were stacked up enough to support their weight on the bed. There was only one, but Luke was still rather small, and Ben wasn’t an overly large being, they could fit. Would you like to play Obnoxiously Long Explanations?”

Luke laughed, as he always did when he suggested that. The title was something that Luke himself had suggested after he asked a question and Ben had gone on a rather long tirade explanation on the subject. The boy’s attention had barely faltered, as the topic was rather of interest to him, but the next time it happened, Luke had used the term and it kind of stuck for those types of talks.

“Yes please!” he cheered, wriggling under his cloak and peering through, his blue eyes shining in excitement. He practically begged in that moment, squirming even further until Ben felt he could take no more. “Can I go first? Please? Please?”

“Alright, alright,” he chuckled, the lines around his eyes wrinkling in a true, genuine smile. Luke always wanted to go first, which Ben could understand. He was young, with many questions. Many questions, especially, since he knew what Ben was and that was a topic, he would constantly have questions for. “What would you like to know?”

“The Jedi!” Luke nearly screeched, his voice rising.

“Your father?” Ben asked, expectantly.

Vehemently, Luke shook his head. “No. Yours.”

That surprised Ben and for a moment, he wasn’t entirely sure how to respond; he did not know how. He was fairly certain that he had told Luke about the type of bonds and child rearing of the jedi. It was a bit more communal than most places, as force sensitives more often than not, faired better with their own, together in groups. “I have no father,” he decided on.

Luke was not deterred, and his tone just grew in excitement and impatience. He was trying to get his point across, surely. “Your jedi master! Tell me about your master. And hismaster! And HIS master!” As he went on, his voice got louder and happier. His enthusiasm was heartwarming and hilarious. Ben loved it and he was more than happy to oblige him. It had been some time since Luke’s encounter with Master Jinn as a Force apparition and his curiosity was overflowing.

“Why,” Ben gaped in mock surprise. “That would take all night.”

Ah, rarely did Ben get his own question in, anyways.

“YAAASSSS!” Luke nearly jumped up with his happy shout, bumping into Ben’s side and arm rather forcefully. There would certainly be a bruise there tomorrow. There was a slam as the headboard of the bed hit the wall behind them, echoing a loud noise through the room. Both of them exchanged surprised and vaguely entertained looks and suppressing giggles.

“Quite little beacon,” Ben hushed him, bringing up his hand with a smile. He couldn’t help himself; the boy was right adorable. “We must be courteous to our neighbors.”

The young boy quieted himself and shrunk in just a bit of shame, he turned towards the headboard and kneeled up from underneath the cloak, nearly bringing his forehead to the wall in some kind of quiet, solemn pledge. “My apologies, gentle beings. I vow to be better,” he whispered to the wall.

Ben could only watch in amusement. Luke looked back up at him, waiting and trying to be patient. But then he sat back down and carefully wrapped part of Ben’s cloak around himself again, curling his legs under his body. He was so eager, the want so great. Ben tried not to see Anakin in his eyes. But Anakin many times wanted to know about Qui-Gon. His hero worship for a dead man he knew for a handful of days was rather astounding.

If he only knew.

He wondered if Luke felt the same. It was interesting he thought. Perhaps all Skywalkers had an interest and love for the maverick jedi, despite both of them had barely known the man.

What did that say?

“Well,” Ben started, slowly, trying to figure out a good place to start. The training lineage itself seemed to be what Luke was after. He wondered how far it would go, how far Luke wanted it. “Master Jinn master was a man from Serenno named Count Dooku. Dooku, in turn, was trained by Master Yoda.”

Luke glanced at him as if he thought he was being tricked, his eyes narrowing in serious suspicion. Ben bit back a laugh, it was amusing to see. “Doesn’t Master Yoda train everyone?” he asked, his voice drawing out in a slow drawl.

Ben nodded. “Yes. But Dooku was Master Yoda’s padawan.”

“Padawan,” Luke tested the word on his tongue, and took care doing it, like it was something he should be respectful of. Like it was important. It should have been, Ben thought bitterly. Luke should have been a jedi, able to find a master he would connect with in a way where that relationship was beloved. Ben knew Anakin probably wouldn’t have wanted Luke to be a Jedi, but Ben couldn’t quite imagine him not. The boy, even at nine years old, had wanted it so badly. “What does that mean?”

“It is the jedi term for apprentice,” Ben started to explain, trying to keep things easy for Luke to understand. The boy was smart for his age but even he knew that Ben had a tendency to go a little overboard at times, “but… it is a little more than that. It is a personal relationship, you learn from your master, spend much time with them and go on missions together.”

Luke considered this and beamed, so bright and happy and beautiful. The thought on his mind was something he was so proud of. “Like us!”

Ben tried not to falter. How could he tell Luke that he could never take him on as a padawan? If he hadn’t completely failed Anakin, hadn’t lost everything. The word was dangerous. Even a mere mention of it was something he had to be careful of. The Empire was extremely prejudice about it, about even thinking that someone may be a jedi or a jedi Padawan. He did not answer. “So,” he continued on their original topic instead. “Count Dooku learned more closely from Master Yoda. Master Yoda has had many padawans. Count Dooku, once upon a time, was my grandmaster, which meant he trained my master, who trained me. He was from a planet called Serenno and was a royal, making him a count.”

“Count Dooku….” Luke tried, narrowing his eyes as he thought about the name and the man behind it. “What was he like?”

“I did not know him as a padawan,” Ben confessed, which was true. He wasn’t entirely sure if Dooku just had not wanted to see him, if he wasn’t living up to the Count’s standards or if Qui-Gon just had not wanted Ben to meet him. Or both, he supposed it could have been both. “I didn’t meet him until much later.”

“Is that strange?”

Ben hummed as he thought about this. “Sometimes, I suppose,” he replied. It had been quite some time before he realized what lineage lines more often than not, were. All jedi, padawans, initiates, even knights, had been trained and taught by many others, even those outside of the lineage. Ben had spent quite some time with several others when he was a young knight. Master Drallig had been one, when he had decided to change his primary form. Eventually he had gone to Master Billaba, a known and excellent practitioner of Soresu for guidance. Ben had not seen or met much of his lineage and those he had, were often evil or dead. Xanatos was not someone he wanted to be associated with, as he had gone dark. As well as Dooku’s last padawan, Vosa and then Dooku himself. His teaching lineage was rather a mess.

Perhaps it shouldn’t have been so surprising that another had fallen so far.

“Many grand masters are often around, some even help teach their padawan’s padawan,” he added, cautiously.

“But he didn’t,” Luke replied, a bit slowly, like he wasn’t sure if he should be saying it.

“No,” Ben shook his head. He wasn’t entirely sure why. He would never really know and his old master, even as a ghost, was not exactly forthcoming with answers, especially when it came to Count Dooku. “He and Qui-Gon had a bit of falling out and often did not see eye to eye.”

“Did you get to meet him?” Luke asked.

“Ah…yes,” he nodded again, although he bit his lip. That was rather complex. Ben hadn’t met him as a jedi but rather, once the older man had fallen to the dark side and had become a sith apprentice. He imagined Dooku became quite different through the transition. “He had become a different person by then and had left the jedi.”

“He became bad.”

“He did bad things, yes,” Ben agreed, careful with his words and his tone. Count Dooku was both an interesting and uneasy topic, but he still had to be cautious with how he said things to an easily impressionable child. “But he wasn’t bad for leaving the jedi. Leaving the jedi isn’t always a bad thing.”

“Why would anyone want to leave the jedi?”

Ben nearly wanted to laugh. Luke said it in such a way that it seemed ridiculous, leaving the jedi. He probably should not have told him all the times he had left or had threatened or thought about leaving. Sometimes the cause was different. “Sometimes, things change. Some people discover it is not the type of life they want to live. There is not shame in it,” he reminded, gentle and patient.

“I want to be a jedi.”

Oh, he sounded so sure. Once upon a time, Anakin had sounded sure.

“I know,” he replied, sensible and slow. He would not berate Luke for wanting this, after all, he could sense it. “But it is okay if you end up changing your mind too.”

“I won’t,” Luke affirmed with a light shrug. “Why did Count Dooku leave?”

“He did not agree with some of the jedi leaders,” Ben explained. It was a bit vague but understandable for the youngster. In all honesty, Ben himself wasn’t entirely sure of all the intricacies behind Dooku leaving and his fall. The two were connected, no doubt. But not everyone who left the jedi became like him. Became like Xanatos or Anakin. “And a man, he told Dooku things, some lies, some things true, from a point of view.”

“But he did bad things anyways,” Luke said, curious but adamant.

“Yes. He hurt people.”

“Did you fight him?”

“Yes. Many times.”

“I wish I could have seen it,” Luke said, wistfully, his eyes glimmering into something of desire. He huffed lightly at the thought. Skywalkers are their obsession with lightsaber fighting. “I bet you fight amazing.”

Ben smiled, a bit uneasily. “I was…an adequate warrior. Count Dooku was a legendary swordsman. One of the best. It took a long time before anyone defeated him.”

“Who beat him?”

“Your father, actually.”

“What?! Really?! That’s so cool! Were you there?”

Ben hummed and nodded. “Yes, Count Dooku was not so easily beaten but your father did it. Dooku, aside from his lightsaber skills was a ruler of a planet and had something of a silver tongue.”

“What is that?”

“He’s very good at talking. Very calm and collected, rarely could one say things that surprised him of caught him off guard,” he explained.

“Kinda like you?”

“Pardon?”

“You are really good at taking,” Luke said seriously, looking up at him.

“I am…alright,” Ben replied, nearly choking on the words. It had been quite some time since someone noticed that. It had been a long time since he had been considered a diplomat, an advisor, a negotiator.

“Can you teach me? To talk like you?”

“Uh…we will see,” Ben chuckled, trying to keep the unease out of his voice. He had once tried to teach Anakin the nuances of speech, especially when it came to speaking with politicians and other scum of the galaxy, but he was more intent on learning about aggressive negotiations. Or at least, that with a lightsaber. Then again, he had never really asked, never really found interest in learning that of the sort. Luke was not Anakin and Ben just had to remind himself of that. Some days were easier than others.

“How many… pada…padawans did Dooku have before he left?” Luke stumbled on the unfamiliar word.

“His first was Rael Aveross, second my master, Qui-Gon Jinn and third, Komari Vosa.”

“Tell me about Master Jinn!”

Of course. Of course. “Are you sure? We can’t go back…”

“Yes! Yes! Yes!”

“Alright, alright,” Ben laughed, keeping his tone light and a bit quiet, trying not to disturb the neighbors. It was getting rather dark and late out and no doubt some beings were, in fact, trying to sleep. He started to explain some things that he remembered about his old master, starting with the big things and swirling down to the more minute details. It was a bit fascinating how much Ben remembered, even after over twenty-five years. It was hard to imagine it had been so long. It was hard to imagine that so little time had passed. “Master Jinn was known to be a bit of a maverick. He just… kind of did what he wanted.”

Luke sighed, overly dramatic, throwing his hands up in the air.

That garnered Ben’s curiosity. “What is it?”

“Does no one follow the rules?”

Ben laughed, a bit loud and hearty. He would have never expected something like that to come from a Skywalker’s mouth. “Yes. Master Jinn wasn’t known for following rules. Sometimes this worked in his favor, other times it did not. He was quite the character.”

“He told me something about the Living Force,” Luke asked, uncertainly.

“Did he visit you?”

Luke nodded.

Ben rolled his eyes. “No regard for rules,” he muttered under his breath.

“I’ll tell him,” Luke said, seriously and Ben absolutely believed him. The boy didn’t go around making promises he did not intend to keep. It was something he rather admired about the boy, even already at his age. “If he does it again.”

“What did he try to tell you?”

“Well, he talked about the Living Force…”

Ben explained what he meant by that, as well as the difference between the living and cosmic/unifying force in a way that he hoped was easy to understand for Luke. It was a bit of a tangent, and he thought the lesson was good and Luke just rolled his eyes at the descripted antics of Ben’s old master. Ben was secretly glad he wasn’t the only one. “Master Jinn…he liked plants and animals, generally things that could and would easily kill a person,” Ben grumbled, but his tone was quite fond. Of course at the time, when Master Jinn was alive, it had been annoying, but over time, Ben had even come to appreciate other lifeforms in the way of faun and flora. “I had to take care of many of his pathetic lifeforms.”

“Pathetic lifeforms,” Luke giggled, trying to keep quiet. “That’s funny. Can we get a pathetic lifeform?”

Ben chuckled; a bit nervous. Oh no, he could not go through that again. “Uh no. I don’t think that would be wise…but maybe, perhaps, we can see about getting a plant.”

“Let me guess, one that doesn’t eat people?”

“I think that would be best, don’t you?” Ben smiled, a bit mischievous. This was progress. He can work with a plant, sure. Perhaps it would help teach Luke responsibility as well.

Luke shrugged. “Maybe. But I want a cool one though.”

Present Past

Anakin

“Angel,” Anakin smiled warmly as Padme’s visage popped up over the table. Even through the holocall, she looked as radiant as ever. Obi-Wan was asleep and Anakin just needed to talk to someone. If it wasn’t Obi-Wan, who he knew he had to speak to, he was lucky it was her. He had thought about the Chancellor, but he imagined the man was rather busy at the moment.

Padme just smiled back and shook her head, mockingly hopeless in her expression. She quicky frowned a little bit, as though she remembered something, and her eyes went worried. “Ani. I heard Obi-Wan crashed. Is he okay?”

He wilted at the change of topic, immediately.

“You won’t believe what has happened,” he sighed, running his flesh hand through his hair. He supposed he did want to talk about Obi-Wan. It was unusual affair when it came to her; as he usually didn’t want to talk about him unless he was letting off steam, but Anakin was confused, he didn’t know what was going on or how to proceed. Perhaps Padme could help. She helped with everything else, so why not this. “Obi-Wan…isn’t Obi-Wan.”

Her expression turned flat, and he could see she did not appreciate what she thought must have been a joke. “What does that mean?”

“This is going to sound crazy, he admitted. And it really was.

“Crazier than Mortis?”

He winced as he remembered that absolutely horrible mission. Where Ahoksa had died. Where he had apparently been turned to the dark side. Where his memories were fuzzy and cold and dark. He only remembered parts of that mission and honestly, he didn’t care too much of trying to regain the memories. “Just about.”

“What happened?”

“It appears….it appears, Obi-Wan has time traveled.” Oh, that coming out of his mouth sounded so weird, so wrong.

She laughed, hollowly, but quicky realized he was genuine and stared at him, wide eyed and surprised. “You cannot be serious.”

He nodded, feeling a bit mute. “Master Vos confirmed it. It’s so messed up.”

“Do we win the war?”

He was a little surprised that it was the first thing she thought of the first thing she asked, especially considering her previous concern about Obi-Wan specifically but then again, she was a senator. She had a stake and claim in the outcome of this war. She wanted it over. She wanted to win.

“It doesn’t sound like it,” he grumbled, still bitter. He didn’t know much about anything when it came to the future. Sure, Obi-Wan hadn’t yet much time to talk since he just woke up, but he still hadn’t said much of anything about it. He certainly didn’t talk to Anakin personally. “I don’t know much at this point. Obi-Wan is not a jedi, he’s on the run and I’m dead. You should have seen him, Padme. I don’t even know where to begin! When he saw me, he pulled a saber on me. A lightsaber! He was going to kill me but then he just…. dropped and hugged me instead! He knows who the Sith Master is but he’s acting so strange…” his ramble finally started to slow down as his mouth just kind of ran out of words to spout out.

Padme stared at him through his rant and then the holo call began to move as she sat down. Probably a good idea, he thought. This was a lot to take in. “This…this is a lot to take in,” she admitted, mirroring his thoughts. “He didn’t tell you who it was?”

He shook his head. “He said its…it’s complicated. He’s paranoid about giving information. He doesn’t trust me! I knew it!” his voice became louder and angrier as he went on, the feeling billowing in his chest.

She just sighed and shook her head, as if she was exasperated with him. He hated it when she looked and felt like that, especially with him. “Did he tell anyone else about the identity?”

“Well, no,” he grumbled.

“Then it’s not you, Ani,” she pointed out, her voice calm and patient and kind. With his mind on Obi-Wan, it seemed somehow reminiscent of how his old master used to speak with him when he was a child. A child to be calmed and pacified. He was not entirely sure how he felt about that. “He’s scared and he doesn’t seem to understand what is going on.”

“He doesn’t even think this is real.”

“What do you mean?”

“He thinks the Sith caught up with him and is manipulating his mind,” he huffed, rubbing his temples, as if that would just take everything away. He had a persistent headache. From what, he wasn’t entirely sure. “We haven’t been able to convince him otherwise yet.”

“It’s pretty clear that he has been through a lot,” Padme replied, a bit slowly and Anakin’s chest grumbled in that continued tone. He was not a child to be placated. “Paranoia probably kept him alive. Try to be patient with him. This has to be very scary and strange to him.”

Anakin groaned and nearly flopped over. She wasn’t wrong. He couldn’t even imagine how he would react in Obi-Wan’s shoes. Probably better, or worse, he grimaced. It was difficult to think about. “I knowwwww…. I just. Augh. He’s taking a nap and then he wants to meditate.”

“Maybe that will help him accept this,” she offered. “You know he always feels better after meditation, even if you don’t.”

He sighed. “I guess.”

“Do you know anything else about the future?”

“Not much. I can’t imagine it’s good, if Obi-Wan of all people is on the run.”

“And you are dead,” she pointed out worriedly. “I might be too.”

That got his attention. “What do you mean?”

“Ani…” she started, keeping her voice slow still. “He’s by himself. He’s your friend, your family. He’s my friend. I’m sure he knows we care about each other. I cannot imagine I would not help him if I had been able. Don’t you think he would try to help me if something happened?”

“Nothing is going to happen.”

“Something did,” she pointed out. She wasn’t wrong but the thought was much too horrible to even consider. He would never let anything happen to her. He didn’t think he would let anything happen to Obi-Wan either, some dark part of him realized, but something had. He had allowed that to happen by dying. “Something so horrible, Obi-Wan is all alone. No friends, no family, no jedi.”

“Not completely alone,” Anakin realized. He hadn’t thought about Luke much in the past couple of hours and the thought was actually kind of shaking his core. Perhaps Padme could shed some light on his thoughts and theories.

“Pardon?”

“Someone came back with him, someone who isn’t even born yet in this time,” he said, trying to find the right words to describe him. He probably should not be talking about this whole-time travel thing with others; Master Windu and the Council seemed to want to keep it under wraps – like so many other things, he thought cynically. But Padme could be trusted. He could trust her. After all, if he couldn’t trust his wife, who would he trust? Some tiny voice deep inside him echoed his master’s name. “His name is Luke and he’s…. crazy protective. Wouldn’t even leave Obi-Wan’s side for a while.”

Padme just smiled, knowingly. “Sounds like someone else I know.”

“That’s different,” he insisted, and it nearly stunned him how quickly he realized what she was talking about. Who, she was talking about. Him. “He’s, my master. We are a team. The best team.”

“And who is Luke?”

Anakin hesitated and glanced away. The idea had been vaguely bouncing around his head, but he hadn’t voiced it yet. “I think…. I think he might be Obi-Wan’s son.”

“No way.”

“I don’t know for sure,” he added, quickly, almost like he was trying to back track. The thought of Obi-Wan having a child at all was rather mind-boggling. Hypocritical maybe, because that meant he had an attachment, at least of some kind. “It’s just…he told Ahsoka his mother died in childbirth and his father…that it was complicated,” he wrinkled his nose in distaste.

“Why do you think he’s Obi-Wan’s son?”

“He’s force sensitive.”

“So are you and he’s not your son,” she pointed out, teasingly.

He snorted again; wasn’t that a thought. “He talks like Obi-Wan, you know, all posh and stuff. Was raised by him. And…do you remember the Duchess of Mandalore.”

“Satine Kryze?”

He nodded. Her eyes widened in understanding. If he recalled, he was pretty sure the Duchess and Padme were friends. She’d probably know, perhaps. “When we rooted out the traitor on her ship, she confessed her feelings and he told her he would have left the order if she asked.”

“Do you think she asked?”

“It seems likely, although I have a hard time imagining he would have done it before the war ended,” he admitted. “Honestly, it’s hard to imagine at all. He’s just…he’s got that perfect jedi thing going on.”

Even he knew that Padme was fighting the urge to roll her eyes. She generally didn’t always completely agree on some of the things Anakin thought about his former master. “If the war ends and Obi-Wan is on the run, as you say,” she realized, thinking about this train of thought. “He may have fled to Mandalore.”

“Then she died in childbirth,” Anakin frowned. “It would have been…really quickly, right after the war. Luke is, like, fifteen, sixteen max.”

“Does he look like Obi-Wan?”

Anakin shook his head but then hesitated. “I don’t think so, but I haven’t really looked you know? I only spent a couple of hours with him and even then, I wasn’t really looking. He’s blonde, like the Duchess, so maybe he looks more like her?”

“We will have to check it out when you get back to Coruscant. Perhaps do a DNA test or something. That would certainly confirm things. You are coming back, right?”

Anakin hesitated. “Not…yet.”

She sighed.

“The colony of Kiros was taken by slavers,” he explained with a snarl at the word, his anger growing more profound as he realized what was happening, what type of mission they were taking on. Slavers. “Captain Rex and Luke were taken by Dooku.”

Padme looked worried but it was washed away with her expression of compete determination. “Then the Republic’s greatest hero has to go and save them.”

Anakin grinned at the praise. “Not to worry, milady, it shall be done.”

“And milady has work to do,” she laughed.

“Awww. Can’t you stay on longer?”

Something in her eyes glimmered. She was up to something, he knew it. “I do believe I have to do my own part,” she said, vaguely. “And you should probably be around Obi-Wan when he wakes up. He’s going to need you. We are going to win this war this time.”

“This time,” Anakin echoed.

Cody

Quinlan Vos was not exactly the kind of person Commander Cody would have expected General Kenobi to be friends with. He has heard a little of General Kenobi’s friends and life, pre-war, but he had heard things, gleaned from snippets from both General Kenobi, General Skywalker and other still. General Vos was someone General Kenobi complained about, but he did it the same way he complained about Skywalker, which made it clear that they were close.

They were friends. Close friends. Perhaps best friends, although from what Cody could tell, several beings like to try and claim that title. He was a bit curious on General Kenobi’s own thoughts on the matter.

Cody had been trying to keep himself busy while his general slept to prepare for the conflict that was undoubtedly in front of them. Boil and his group had been replaced for clean up on the planet. The trooper had already been ready for another fight when Cody explained what had happened to like and Waxer. Waxer was his best friend and Luke…no one was entirely sure what Luke was to them at this stage, but he was something. Something their troops cared about. Their trusted little fellowship was already fond of the boy, nearly as much as they were to Luke.

Needless to say, no one was happy upon discovering Luke and Waxer’s dilemma and situation. All of them prepared for the next assignment and then milled around the overall area where their general slept. Cody didn’t stop them. They knew about the future and even beside that, there was something else. A change they could feel.

Cody was talking to Barlex and Threepwood, quietly discussing next moves involving the chips. Commander Colt and Alpha-17 were already starting research and had discovered the location of the chip in their heads. It could be found by a level five atomic scan, something few ships had access to. Although, with the right equipment, the surgery did not appear too difficult.

“We need to talk to the jedi about this,” Threepwood said quietly. “You know what Luke did. He can help the droids scan and find the chips.”

“They probably also have access to the necessary scanners and droids,” Barlex added, his voice gruff as per usual.

“We have to be very careful,” Cody warned. “This information could cause widespread panic, or worse, word getting out to the Sith and the chips could be activated early.” It was a terrible thing to think about, much less consider. Even though he technically knew it had happened, happened to his general, it was hard to wrap his head around. He could not even imagine doing such a thing.

“We need help,” Threepwood insisted.

“We do not have the resources to de-chip the entire GAR while we fight this war,” Barlex agreed, although rather grudgingly. He didn’t always seem to like agreeing with other people. “Or the equipment, the time, the excuses.”

“I know,” Cody hissed.

“If you need boys de-chipped fast, contacting jedi healers and perhaps jedi with smaller clone attachments might be a good start.”

The three of them shut up quicky and spun around, lining up in front of the jedi general in perfect formation to salute in practiced smooth movements. “Sir!” one of them near shouted. Cody didn’t know who it was. He didn’t dare look.

“We didn’t…”

General Vos raised a hand, smirking subtly and casually. Cody wanted to feel relaxed, he really did. This was General Kenobi’s friend; couldn’t they trust him? He truly hoped so. “Don’t worry, I’m no snitch. Well, actually I am, but not in this case,” he smiled at his own joke, although it was a bit weak. “I know about the chips and what happened in Obi-Wan’s future.”

That helped ease the tension a bit. General Vos gave them a rundown on his specific abilities to give them a rational explanation to his access of knowledge. And then he continued to explain his suggestion. “There are healers stationed everywhere and if there is one thing they know, aside from healing, it is digression. They have any and all excuses, especially as jedi, to see troopers.”

“The surgery is apparently pretty easy,” Barlex also noted. “Luke did several with the help of a basic med droid, quickly.”

An eyebrow rose curiously. “Then it should definitely be faster and easier with actual healers. I can contact Master Healer Che and start proceedings in that area.”

“She’s your top coordinator?” Cody asked. He nodded. “Maybe start with the other healers, away from Coruscant.”

“What are you afraid of?”

Was he that obvious?

“The danger is centered there,” Cody replied, vaguely. The others glanced at him, but he didn’t meet their gaze. The speculation was just that…speculation but even if it was confirmed, if the chips didn’t spread mass panic, the acknowledgment and identity of the man behind all of this, would.

“I wanted to talk to you,” General Vos dropped it for now. “About Obi-Wan, Luke, steps going forward to prevent that future.”

“Barlex and Threepwood know,” Cody stated firmly, as General Vos glanced between the three of them warily. Cody answered his silent question immediately. “Luke asked me to gather some of the boys and he explained what he knew. They are de-chipped. Waxer knows.”

“He’s with Luke,” General Vos realized, after a moment. General Kenobi must have told him about Waxer, Cody thought. He couldn’t really believe that General Vos knew any of them by name. Before this, he hadn’t really spent much time with the 212thbattalion and the only one he ever really interacted with to some degree was Cody himself. “I am not certain of that will end up being a good or a bad thing.”

“He will do his duty.”

“I have little doubt,” General Vos agreed, a bit readily, to their surprise. “Who else knows?”

Cody didn’t think the names or even numbers would mean anything to the jedi, but he listed them off anyways. “The Medic,” General Vos realized as Cody went over Helix’s name and gestured for them to follow. They ended up in General Kenobi’s office which Barlex pointed out as they got in, his voice just flat enough not to sound too insubordinate or disrespectful.

“It’s easier to get into his mindset here.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mentioned my psychometry. It’s linked to that. I got a lot from Luke before the battle,” he said, as they settled in. Everyone was still rather uneasy. “And even more from Obi-Wan. It’s…it is really bad.”

“We are forced to kill the jedi,” Barlex noted.

“Even the little ones,” Threepwood finished, quiet and pained at the thought. No one knew exactly who had marched on the Temple in General Kenobi’s past and their possible future. For all they knew it could have been them. Maybe it had been. Maybe not. It didn’t matter so much at this point; they still felt it rather keenly, almost as though they had personally done it. It was a horrible thought.

General Vos nodded. “Obi-Wan was unconscious when I got the information from him so… so I didn’t feel that in the way he felt it. I didn’t feel his pain and grief in the full force that I would have if he had been awake; just the…remnants of it.”

“You know who did it,” Barlex voiced something they had all realized.

“Pardon?”

“You know who attacked the Temple,” Cody answered for him, quietly. “You know who killed and massacred the children, the elderly, the sick and injured. You know who led them.”

General Vos didn’t let his face show anything. Cody wondered if that was a skill all Jedi knew because General Kenobi was good at that as well. It didn’t matter what he showed on his face and what he did not. His pause spoke volumes.

“Who was it?” Barlex nearly demanded.

Threepwood just froze. He didn’t want to know.

“Was it us?”

Vos’s response was immediately. “No. No, it wasn’t you.”

No one dared to let out the large breath they were all holding. It was uncomfortable, they were uncomfortable, and they knew it, even if it was not them, it had been someone.

Cody had a theory, a feeling.

He did not like it.

He wanted it verified, a desperate plea for himself to be wrong, but he did not voice it. He could not bring himself to. General Vos caught his eye. Cody just wilted.

“It doesn’t matter,” he said, instead. “As long as we move quickly and quietly, it won’t happen at all. Obi-Wan is awake, as I’m sure you are all aware. At this point in time, he does not believe this to be real. He thinks that this is a complex Sith mind trick. This will be a lot more difficult if we cannot convince Obi-Wan of otherwise.”

“He will come to the right conclusion,” Cody affirmed. “He’s practical and smart. He will figure it out.”

“I imagine time travel is pretty difficult to wrap one’s head around,” Threepwood grimaced. “We were lucky, I think, having Luke around. He’s not born yet, and he knows things he couldn’t have known unless General Kenobi had told him.”

“We are heading to Zygerria,” General Vos continued. “General Koon and the 104thare going to Kadavo to retrieve the Kiros colonists, on Obi-Wan’s intelligence. We, in the meantime, are headed to the planet to get their governor and make some noise to attract Dooku,” he explained.

“Why?”

“We are fairly certain he has Luke and the missing troopers.”

The boys bristled. “They are dead, aren’t they?”

“We don’t think so,” he disagreed.

“Why? Count Dooku does not take trooper hostages,” Barlex pointed out.

“Usually, yes,” General Vos nodded. “But he thinks Luke is Obi-Wan’s padawan and, especially due to his very…sudden…disappearance, Dooku’s interest is undoubtedly high with him and the situation surrounding him.”

“And?”

“He will probably use the troopers as leverage, hostages,” General Vos confessed with a frown. “If Count Dooku wanted those troopers dead, I imagine we would have just found their bodies in the air base on Umbara. Luke is young and he is rather fond of you, it appears. They will make decent leverage.”

“He is,” Threepwood sighed.

“But what Luke knows about the future…could it be that valuable to Dooku?” Barlex asked. “Luke was born after the war.”

“I doubt Dooku, at this point, knows about the time travel and we think Dooku’s interest is in Luke’s relation to Obi-Wan. As most of you probably know… Count Dooku…he’s a bit fond of him.”

“He shows it in very strange ways,” Threepwood muttered.

“He is Obi’s grand master.”

Threepwood and Barlex sputtered.

“Count Dooku is General Kenobi’s grandfather?”

General Vos looked vaguely uncomfortable with the phrase but shook his head lightly, like that wasn’t exactly it. It wasn’t, Cody knew the jedi didn’t have grandfathers in the way that many other cultures did but that didn’t make those relationships any less personal. “Err…. not exactly but sort of? He trained Obi-Wan’s master, Qui-Gon Jinn.”

“That is…. messed up,” Threepwood sighed.

“We want him to come to Zygerria. He’s in league with the slaver queen there, no doubt working some angle. According to Obi-Wan, he had gone to the planet last time when she didn’t quite…listen to the Count.”

“So, we are kind of doing the same thing?”

General Vos just smiled. “More like we are going to make a bit of a mess and kark some things up to get Dooku to come. Just a small team for now, lure him in and then attack with the 501st and 212th.”

“I can put together a task force, sir,” Cody said. He knew exactly who to bring.

“I would say you should probably stay on the ship, but I don’t think you will,” he cracked a sly grin.

“Barlex can cover,” Cody replied, readily, glancing at his brother. His gaze hardened in determination, and he nodded. “Besides, I think me being there, with Boil, might help.”

“How do you mean?”

“Both Boil and I were in the future, we lived…longer than most,” Cody explained but it was difficult to get through. He didn’t know much about the future and he didn’t particularly like talking about the fates of his brothers, as horrible as they were. As little as he knew, with only speculation and hypothesis to guide him through. “He’s a bit more comfortable around those people, especially Boil. He’s got a bit of a soft spot for him and he’s still alive in General Kenobi’s future.”

“He did mention him before,” General Vos noted.

“I brought him back from cleanup. He’s probably already talking with the General now,” Cody added. “General Kenobi prefers short power naps more than anything. The more comfortable he is with the squad, the more information we will get and the more likely he may be more inclined to believe.”

“And they won’t let anything happen to him,” Barlex vowed, darkly.

“Finally!” a new voice grumbled as the door was forced open. Helix burst in with a long sigh and a huff. “General, commander. I guess I should have known. I thought you would want to know. General Kenobi is awake.”

Ben

“Obi-Wan! Please!”

“It was only a dream, dear one. Dreams pass in time.”

“He will never want me.”

“You will never remind me.”

“Ben!”

“Obi-Wan!”

“I love you.”

“And you, you’ve grown sadder.”

“Trust in the Force.”

“I will not abandon you.”

“I would have chosen you over and over given the chance.”

“I foresee you becoming a greater jedi than I.”

“He was my best friend, my brother.”

“You can see that?”

“It’s just you and me, old man.”

“Is it true?”

“Yes.”

“I am so proud of you.”

“We were waiting.”

“I’m waiting.”

“You have become a far greater jedi than I could ever hope to be.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“If In die here, it’s going to be your fault.”

“If I die here, it’s going to be with you.”

“Forgive me if I still think I know you better than anyone else.”

“I know what you wanted. I’m not leaving him.”

“You do.”

“We meet again.”

“It is all your fault.”

“LIES!”

“It’s over Anakin.”

“It hate you.”

“I love you.”

Ben’s inhale back into consciousness, coming from his slumber, was quick and deep, accompanied by a dry throat and wet cheeks.

“Welcome back, general.”

It took a rather embarrassingly long moment for Ben to put a finger on the name. It had been a very long time. He racked his brain, but eventually, the short-term memories came back forward. The star destroyer. Quinlan. Umbara 2.0. What did the Sith Lord want with staging this specific campaign? Surely, he would be smart enough to know Ben wouldn’t do the same things as last time; that surely, he would try to be better, do better, save more lives. No matter how hard he tried, Ben just couldn’t quite stop being a jedi. He wondered how the casualty counts compared to the first time around.

“Helix,” Ben murmured, a bit fondly. “It has been a while.”

“So, you have said,” Helix hummed, and Ben could feel him going over him, checking for anything and everything, going through his vitals while the jedi regained himself. “Longer for you than me, as your padawan says it.”

“My padawan?” Ben mused.

“Luke,” Helix supplied.

“Is that what he calls himself?”

“No,” Helix shrugged. “But it seems kind of obvious to us. Good kid, though. Kind, generous. Protective of you…and us, it appears.”

“He has always wanted to meet the people of my past.”

“Well, if you tell him a bunch of glory stories, that does not seem too surprising.”

“They were flattering ones, I assure you.”

“Not the ones where we kill all of you, I imagine.”

The plain facts and rational tone of Helix’s voice caught Ben off guard. He turned to stare at him in surprise, a little wide eyed. Oh, the man hadn’t changed a bit. He was just like how Ben remembered him over sixteen years ago. “You…how… I don’t know what you are talking about,” he settled on.

Look at that, he could be at a loss for words.

“Luke told us,” Helix confessed. “Got the chips out and everything. Just a few of the boys to start. I think he wanted some allies. The Commander, Gearshift, Trapper, Longshot, Threepwood, Barlex, Wooley, Crys, your favorites,” he smirked at the end.

Ben sputtered. “What…I do not-.”

“Don’t worry, general,” he just chuckled. “Everyone has favorites, and we get it. Care isn’t finite or whatever; jedi-way. We all know. Can’t say we completely blame ya, those two are surprisingly good with you. However, speaking of which, Commander Cody did pull some strings, so Boil came with us instead of staying on Umbara for cleanup.”

“He can to Kiros with us last time,” Ben mused, quiet and mostly to himself. “He wanted to get his mind off of…off of Waxer.”

“Waxer died on Umbara the first time, didn’t he?”

It wasn’t much to jump to that conclusion, apparently. He wondered what Luke had told them. Ben swallowed and nodded. “Friendly fire.”

“Commander Cody told me. He said Luke put a stop to it. As far as we know, currently, they are both still alive.”

“Things have already changed,” Ben mumbled. “Luke wasn’t here last time…could it…”

“Boil is coming up,” Helix said quietly. “It may be a few minutes. Would you like to talk to him? I know he isn’t your future version but perhaps a friendly and known presence might help ground you.”

“Ground me?”

“You confessed earlier that you believed this was a Sith trick; a mental manipulation orchestrated by the Sith,” Helix began to explain, only a bit hesitant.

Ben nodded.

“Maybe he could help,” he shrugged. “It’s a little difficult to see Boil as a grounding influence but well, who knows?”

“Alright,” Ben conceded. He rather thought he would like to see the trooper again anyways. Even if he may have just been a figment of this trick, Helix was not wrong, a friendly face would always be a blessing.

“It’ll be a couple of minutes. I have some boys to look over, can you handle a bit by yourself?”

He just laughed, lightly. “Of course, Helix. Go on.”

*

Arfour was not having a good time.

Her pathetic lifeform had finally awoken but he was just all over the place. Running around like a maniac, his vitals all over the place and nothing that came out of his person that made any sense. Not real? What was not real?

He looked at her as if he had not seen her in a very long time.

It had been not even a singular day.

She let the two humanoids speak and she waited for her turn quietly. [pathetic lifeform] was tired and confused but seeing [know-it-all] appeared to make him a bit more at ease. Some residents of the ship made him more at ease than others.

She took note of that.

[pathetic lifeform] smiled kindly at her as she rolled into his room beeping indignantly. Looking down at her, there was something, an expression, on his face that her current data banks just could not quite identify. “Ah, Arfour. I think we have some work to do.”

*

Boil’s face appeared in the doorway and all Ben could think was how young he looked. Last time he had seen Boil, he had much more scruff on his face, more wrinkles, grey hair. But he carried himself the same.

Ben wasn’t sure if even the Sith could duplicate that.

His expression instinctively softened at the sight of him. “Hello, Boil.”

The trooper shifted; a bit uncomfortable. Things were not the same as they were in the future; Ben had to be careful. “General. It’s good to see you awake. We…I mean some of the boys were worried.”

Ben nodded. “My apologies. That was not my intention.”

The trooper was fighting back his reactions, probably that of a disbelieving snort. He was trying so hard, Ben mused. He wondered if Boil was a figment of his imagination, the last throws to preserve what was left of his sanity.

Losing it to a Sith Lord wasn’t exactly the way he wanted to go.

Embarrassing.

He was closer now.

“My apologies, sergeant,” he repeated.

“For what, sir?”

“When Luke…helped you off of Vader’s ship, you wanted to stay with us. He loved you. I think you may have been Luke’s only real friend at that point.”

Boil swallowed. Ben didn’t know if he understood.

“I couldn’t let you. I couldn’t let you stay with us. Sometimes I regret it but…that’s not the jedi way.”

“Why did you not want me to stay?”

“I could not give Vader another loved one to be targeted,” Ben rasped. It was too late, the Sith already knew. So much in Ben’s head…sometimes he wished he was a droid, able to just wipe it all away.

Boil just stared at him and Ben wanted to reach out in the force with his feelings and projections. It had been a long time since he had done that amongst troopers.

He didn’t dare.

“Why…” Boil hesitated and glanced away. “Why does Vader hate you so much? Who is he?”

Ben’s breath caught. He had never actually confessed it to anyone, who Vader was.

Boil seemed to sense Ben’s panic and quickly tried to backtrack. The tone of his voice sounded strange paired with Boil’s gruff voice and his usual attempt to be calm and surly and brusque. “I am so sorry, sir. You do not have to tell me. It is completely fine. It doesn’t even matter really. He’s not here and you are not there.”

“I used to,” Ben struggled to speak. “I know him. Vader he…”

Ben stopped and stiffened. Boil followed his snap quick gaze to where Skywalker was standing in the doorway.

“Sergeant, would you mind leaving us for a bit?” Ben asked, not unkindly. He would not let a Sith near the trooper if he could help it. If Vader had donned Anakin’s visage. He wasn’t sure who this was, if it was Vader or someone else playing him or even yet, Anakin himself. Quinlan and several others had tried to convince him that he was in the past. For one of the first times ever, Boil hesitated, as if he wasn’t sure he should actually do as he had been asked. But after a moment, he walked out with a touch of bristle on his shoulders.

It did not escape Anakin’s attention but he, surprisingly, did not say a word.

Instead, he walked over to Ben and carefully sat next to him.

He felt so real, Ben mused. Like he could reach out and touch him, a familiar warm body under his fingers that wouldn’t burn at the contact.

Anakin always burned in his dreams.

It was a horrible think, to wish he had made sure he had killed Anakin on Mustafar well over a decade ago. So much pain could have been avoided. All it would have cost was Ben himself, leaving all the hurt and pain and horribleness for his mind and shoulders.

He was rather good at that.

He thinks perhaps killing Anakin on Mustafar would have broken him, most times. As much sadness as he could bear, he wasn’t sure if he could survive that.

But then again, Obi-Wan Kenobi had died alongside Anakin Skywalker that day.

If Quinlan and Helix and everyone else was right, if this was real and he was somehow back in his own history, able to make choices and change anything, that meant… did that mean Anakin Skywalker lived once more?

And if he did, did that mean Obi-Wan Kenobi was revived as well?

Could it be possible?

Everything had felt so real, although Ben hadn’t dared to reach out too much to others in the Force. He hadn’t even touched any bonds. If the old ones were still there and not ravaged…he did not know what he’d do.

“I had so much to say,” Anakin started, his voice uncharacteristically subdued and muted, fighting so hard to remain and relaxed and patient. “But I don’t know anymore. I’ve been thinking about things for hours and hours. Everything is going to be so different now.”

“What do you mean?”

“For me, it has only been a day. A day since it was you and me, like always. A day ago, I thought everything was fine. I thought we were okay. For me, the things that you have gone through have not happened yet. I’m alive and healthy, early twenties with a young padawan, fighting in a galaxy-wide war,” he tried to explain but Ben could tell, he was certainly struggling. “But for you, for you, it has been over fifteen years. You saw the end of the war, and something so terrible happened, you left the jedi and are on the run.”

“I did not leave,” he mumbled, absentmindedly. He hadn’t even been aware that he had spoken it until moments after, when Anakin’s head jerked, eyes meeting his in some form of terrified confusion. It looked so real, his uncertainty, and Ben wanted so desperately to believe it. Because if Anakin was befuddled and perplexed, then perhaps he didn’t know, perhaps Quinlan was right and this was actually his padawan. Not the monster that was using his body.

“Huh?”

“I did not leave,” he repeated, a bit louder.

“Did they…kick you out?” Anakin asked, skeptical and unconvinced.

Ben shook his head. “No. Everyone is dead and gone. I’m the last of the jedi.”

*

Anakin

Anakin just choked. That was not what he was expecting. Not that he had many expectations at this point. It was still painful to think about, however, and anything Anakin had expected, they both knew, this was not it.

Ten thousand jedi.

One survivor.

“That’s impossible,” he whispered. He hadn’t even realized he had said it. His voice was hoarse, like he hadn’t spoken in years or if he had spoken too much in that time. It was an odd contradiction, but all Anakin could feel was like he was choking on nothing at all. Because that could not have happened.

“Unfortunately, it very much is possible,” Ben hummed. “I have seen the Temple bathed in blood, bodies thrown carelessly across the halls, shot in the back. I have seen younglings murdered in their beds. They never stood a chance.”

Rage was swelling in Anakin’s chest and Ben studied him curiously. He didn’t seem entirely sure about the validity of his reaction just yet, which just didn’t make any sense. His wariness and paranoia would normally hurt and anger Anakin but right now, he was barely paying attention. It was the overwhelming and heartbreaking feelings that dominated absolutely everything at this point, because there was so many. So many jedi, ten thousand. And they were all just…gone?

Who could have possibly done such a thing?

“How are you not furious?”

“It happened over fifteen years ago,” Ben rasped, and his voice was hoarse and pained. It was like he hadn’t spoken in a long time. Anakin wondered if that actually was the case. “I doubt the horror and grief I felt then will ever truly fade but I cannot…I could not do anything about it.”

“You can now,” Anakin insisted. “We can. It hasn’t happened yet. We can fix this.”

Ben was humming, non-committedly. “Interesting,” he murmured.

Anakin’s brain kept buzzing. This wasn’t happening, was he different and nothing could change it? Was it so bad that Anakin would never have his best friend back? He couldn’t imagine a life now without Obi-Wan being right there, at his side. And he didn’t want to. “What is happening to you?”

He just sighed, long suffering and tired. Obi-Wan was always tired these days but there was something in his expression that was just a little more. “A lot has happened and I’m not sure what you want from me.”

“I want my master back.”

“What does that entail, exactly?”

How to answer that. With everything that was happening and everything that had happened. All of their lives and things they had done and said and not done and said. That was a question he didn’t think he could truly answer, not in its entity. Because this was Obi-Wan and that is all Anakin wanted. “I didn’t realize things had changed so much with us until…until this whole time travel thing. Things have changed so drastically but it is like I don’t know us anymore. We are a tram, the team. We are the best, I can’t even imagine my life without you. But I’ve realized…. it’s like… I don’t know what we are anymore. It’s not the same.”

Much of that may be my fault, I suppose.”

Anakin was so startled by his instinctive desire to agree to such a prospect. When had he turned into the default for blaming Obi-Wan? When had it become so easy? But before Anakin could gather himself again and his thoughts to speak, the older jedi continued. What he said next didn’t seem at all in direct relation to his previous statement.

He was practically choking on the words. “If this is a dream, I do not want it to end.”

Anakin didn’t think he meant to say that out loud. “This is real, master, I swear.”

“I never truly knew why you did it,” he replied, instead. A lump formed in Anakin’s throat. What had he done? “I knew you had resentment, some notion that I had been holding you back. You have said it. If I had, it was never intentional. I’m not exactly the best jedi or teacher, and I know you deserved better, someone who actually knew what they were doing. I know you wanted Qui-Gon and I…don’t blame you. I just didn’t realize I had done so poorly and failed you so much. I did not realize how far you had fallen or when it started.”

Anakin froze. That was much to unravel at the moment. He ended up focusing on the end of the speech.

Fallen? As in…?

It couldn’t be possible.

“What did I become?”

Ben did not want to answer, which just worried Anakin more. He must have been so truly terrible for him to withhold this.

Quinlan Vos appearing was annoying, to put it mildly, as Anakin seemed to believe they were making progress. For answers. But Ben, although subtly, looked visibly relieved. “Hey, Obes,” Master Vos greeted with a smooth smile and a comforted expression, as he carefully entered. “How are you feeling?”

“A bit confused,” Ben admitted, truthfully. “None of this makes sense. I don’t know what Sidious wants from me.”

“Perhaps we are telling the truth, maybe this is time travel,” Master Vos suggested.

“Time travel. An interesting notion,” Ben mused. “Not impossible, however rather unlikely.”

“Why is that?”

“Anakin is acting rather strange.”

“How?”

Obi-Wan exhaled and closed his eyes. Upon opening them, he stared at Anakin as if he thought he would disappear. Anakin stared back at him. This didn’t make any sense Then Obi-Wan turned to look back at Quinlan. “Worried, concerned. Not nearly as angry and resentful as the last time I saw him. I wish this cruel trick would end. But, at the same time, I feel as though this could be a wonderful dream.”

Anakin’s breath caught and emotions, feelings, everything just came rushing in all at once. It was nearly unbearable. “How could you?” his voice stuttered in something of vibration, of hurt and pain. “How could you think that I don’t care?!” he cried.

“Skywalker,” Quinlan warned.

“After-.”

Anakin,” Quinlan snapped, a little louder.

His jaw snapped shut. He was trying, he was trying, he was trying; they could give him back. He had to be careful, they all did. Anakin hated being so worried and concerned about what he said or felt. But he just wanted Obi-Wan back. And he would do anything. “I would rather like to meditate, if you would allow,” Obi-Wan said, quietly, unable to meet Anakin’s eyes.

“This isn’t a Sith trick; you are allowed to do as you please.”

“I’m not sure if I want to believe you. The implications of this…. of this not being a trick or a hallucination or a dream…I do not know what I would do with it. It has been fifteen years, in such a dark galaxy, hunted relentlessly for so long.”

“We are going to fix it, master,” Anakin assured, as he tried to calm himself; trying to breathe. He still sounded determined, dangerous. “I won’t let it happen again. I won’t let it.”

“You keep saying such things as that,” Obi-Wan hummed, his brow furrowing. “As though you think you can control it all.”

Quinlan interrupted before Anakin could say something stupid. Which, in all honesty, Anakin knew most would have probably found anything he would say next rather dumb. “Would meditation help you?”

“I haven’t…reached in the Force that way yet,” he admitted. “Since I woke up.”

“Maybe it is time,” Quinlan offered. “Perhaps it will help you determine your reality.”

“Perhaps,” Obi-Wan agreed. “Would you like to join me?”

“Sure. Do you want to go somewhere else?”

Obi-Wan just shrugged. “Surprisingly, here is fine.”

“Do you intend to join us?” Quinlan asked Anakin.

“Yes,” he nearly growled.

“Then can you at least quiet your mind? Your chaotic way of doing things is doubtfully going to be much help with Obi-Wan,” Master Vos replied, flatly.

“It’s alright,” the older master assured, almost sounding even fond of the way that Anakin does things, even something as an attempt at meditation. “Even after all this time, I know Anakin Skywalker. I’d be interested how things end up. With the Sith, with all of their resources, I find it doubtful they could be able to reproduce it.”

Anakin shot Quinlan a smug grin.

They settled down on the floor and Anakin commed Ahsoka. She had gotten there in record time and was invited to join them as well. Obi-Wan’s gaze was soft at the sight of her, something nostalgic and pained. Anakin wondered if she survived, but then he remembered what Obi-Wan had said about survivors. Or lack thereof.

Anakin had never tried quite so hard at the typical form of meditation than he did just then. All the worry, all the fear; he tried so hard. But every time he opened his eyes, every time he reached out, he could see Obi-Wan smirk, subtly. Like he knew something.

Like Anakin’s meditation habits were familiar and amusing.

Was this progress? Was it possible that Anakin could get Obi-Wan back?

At the very least, most of him?

More beings approached, tentative and hesitant as Anakin sunk into the Force again. The 212th, no doubt, and at least six of them. He tried not to pay attention, but he didn’t recognize any of them off hand. Obi-Wan certainly did.

He continued to relax.

Anakin bit back a scowl. Obi-Wan was more comfortable with the troops than Anakin himself at this point. He didn’t really know any of them. Obi-Wan knew several of Anakin’s own 501st by name…perhaps, Anakin should get to know of some of Obi-Wan’s 212th.

He made a note to himself.

“Is there something you need, commander?” Obi-Wan asked, suddenly.

Anakin startled out of the meditation. He hadn’t even noticed the officer approach. Cody stood in the doorway, patient and dutiful as always.

“You have a call, sir,” Cody responded, a bit quiet.

Obi-Wan silently untangled himself from his position on the floor and stood. “Of course, Commander. Ahsoka, Quinlan…Anakin. I will take my leave. I hope you found this meditation as enlightening as I.”

Quinlan and Anakin perked. Perhaps…?

He and Anakin just glanced at one another. Progress, they both thought. Perhaps they were making progress.

*

Cody

“Did you sleep well?”

“Well enough,” Ben shrugged as he and Commander Cody made their ways through the halls, away from the medical bay. “I do believe I will feel better when I find Luke. Who is requesting my presence?”

“General Windu, sir,” Cody responded easily.

The general let out a little tension in his shoulders while Cody just watched. He had been expecting someone else, he noted, someone worse. Someone he was fearing to speak to. The commander was grateful he could give him someone to speak with that the general actually cared for. Perhaps he could prevent Obi-Wan from talking with that person, the person he dreaded. The room they entered already had the call going, with a shimmering blue visage in the middle.

“Hello Mace,” General Kenobi greeted, fondly.

“Obi-Wan,” Genera Windu softened in such a way that Cody had only heard from Ponds before. Sometimes he had thought that the general hadn’t even been capable of it. It was a rude thought, he knew, but General Windu wasn’t often one to show such sentiment. Then again, this was General Kenobi. From what Cody knew, they had known each other for a very long time and were friends. “How are you feeling?

“I have been asked that quite a bit,” General Kenobi admitted. “I have gotten some sleep and was able to do some meditating. I will concede there is a possibility this is…this is real. Time travel is not exactly impossible,” he continued, a bit quiet, tentative, as if gauging reactions. “I just…I am unsure how to accept it as a possibility, after everything that has happened.”

I don’t know what happened in your past,” General Windu confessed, and he did not look happy about it. Cody had heard about General Windu’s abilities with something called shatter points. He wondered if he could see or feel them through holo calls and if anything changed with them the first time this had happened. “But I know it must have been truly devastating. And those things that happened to you, I…we cannot take those experiences away. But you, us, we have a unique chance to change the horrors of what you have witnessed for others.”

“I will,” General Kenobi vowed, strong and resolute. “I will do what I must. I will not let you down.”

General Windu just looked a little sad, like he knew something that no one else did about him. Cody found it hard to imagine that someone would be a bit upset by General Kenobi’s drive and declaration of persistence. Usually, it was a good trait to have, as far as Cody knew. “I know you won’t. There is a reason I called. We have an intelligence officer that was around Zygerria; the one that gave us the information on the Kiros colonists.”

General Kenobi hummed. “Did this person give you more information?”

He nodded. “Dooku is already heading to Zygerria. His little detour to Umbara has made the Queen send a ship and some of her workers to escort him to her. Basic contact has been made with your missing troopers.”

Both he and General Kenobi perked. “Luke?”

“He has been confirmed aboard but no contact yet.”

“That is something at least.”

“Caution is key, especially with Dooku aboard the ship as well.”

General Kenobi seemed to understand and agreed. “Do not attract attention, I understand. Luke can take care of himself.”

“Even against Dooku?”

“He has been trained and prepared to deal with much worse.”

“Who is he?”

“I’m not sure you would believe me if I tried,” General Kenobi replied, a faintly amused smile quirking from his lips. General Windu mirrored his expression and shook his head, exasperated and fond. “Have you met him?”

“I have not talked to him or seen him, yet no,” General Windu replied, now a bit curious and even a tad more suspicious, although it seemed mocking rather than actually serious. “Why?”

This just made General Kenobi’s smile grow as something twinkled in his eye. “I think, if this is real, I might just love it when you do.”

“Now I’m concerned,” General Windu replied, eyes furrowing.

To Cody’s absolute pleasure and the other High General’s surprise, General Kenobi burst into a light fit of mellow and gentle laughter, authentic and genuine. “Don’t be too worried, dear. Luke meeting you will most likely be the least of your problems.”

Cody didn’t think that made General Windu feel much better, but the mood was lightened just a bit and Cody felt he had some hope. Their conversation lasted a while longer, and while they spoke, they included Cody within their ideas and thoughts on what to do next. Their plan shifting into something a bit less noisy and a bit more subtle. Cody thought with General Skywalker around, it would dive right back into crazy.

He was pretty sure General Kenobi agreed.

*

Their approach to Zygerria space was upcoming and everyone was feeling the anxiety. It spread over most of the ship but centered around the jedi and those closest to them. Everyone knew about what had happened to Captain Rex and Lieutenant Waxer and the other boys and with the hope that they may still be alive, there was concern and optimism with the chance. The closer they got, the angrier Skywalker got, and General Kenobi avoided talking to him by busying himself with relaying orders and going over plans with the others.

“Boil, Trapper, Wooley, Longshot,” Cody ordered, listing off the names rather easily. There were so few of them that he could keep the circle too. He wondered if Luke would be against him widening their circle. There were several other troopers he knew he could trust, and he felt as he could use the help. “You’re with the general and me. Barlex, Threepwood, Crys, Gearshift, I need you to hold down the fort.”

None of them appeared very pleased with being away from the action.

“I need people who know about Luke and the general’s situation, in case something happens,” Cody continued, trying to calm their nerves. “Because whatever happens, we need to prevent the genocide of the jedi and continue to de-chip the GAR so we cannot be used in such a way,” he said, sternly.

It was then agreed rather readily.

*

Anakin

There were many ships going to and from Zygerria as of late and Skywalker just kept growling at the options before them, as each and every one was passed for any number of reasons. He hated that they were just letting them go, one by one, just waiting and trying to find the right one, the one that would suit their needs. They were going to board and take over a ship that was headed to the planet, the home planet of one of the most notorious former slave empires, one that already had access for easy passage to the ground. There were many to choose from and apparently, they had to be careful with their choice.

He hated it.

But they found one. They found one and were simply waiting for it to fall into their grasp. It would be rather easy enough, he imagined. They were standing on the bridge, patiently waiting. Or at least, most of them were patient. Anakin just kept scowling as his hate and anger rose higher and higher. Obi-Wan had hesitated and Anakin saw it, but he put a hand on the young knight’s shoulder, squeezing just gently, like he wasn’t entirely sure if his hand would go through him or not. Like he wasn’t certain Anakin was solid. Whoever had done this to him, whoever had made Obi-Wan doubt himself so much like this, Anakin would make them pay. And then Obi-Wan would never have to feel that way again. “Their empire will not rise again,” he assured, his voice quiet but certain in his words.

Anakin clenched his fist and tried to release it. His voice was rising, only kept low and down by the growl of his chest space in his tone, grumbling up through his throat. It didn’t really matter how loud or quiet he was, however, and although he didn’t really notice it at first, the other officers on the bridge were rather uneasy with his feelings. “Those slaver scum think they are better than everyone else, that they can just bend everyone to their sick will.”

“Be mindful of your feelings,” the statement was almost oddly comforting, it was rather a staple of Obi-Wan’s teachings, as much as Anakin got irritated with it on a constant basis. He hated it, normally, Obi-Wan telling him this. But it was such a normal statement in their dealings, in their life, the one with Obi-Wan, it was also a comfort. At least something was normal. “You cannot let them control you.”

He bit back a scowl. His feelings were what made him powerful, special, but he tried to appease his master. He would do anything right now just to get a little piece of him back. “I know. I know.”

“Breathe with me.”

“What?”

“Breathe with me,” Obi-Wan repeated and for once, Anakin could understand why people thought Obi-Wan so patient. Anakin actually heard him, actually looked into his tone and his voice and him in the Force. He wasn’t judging him, he wasn’t angry or upset, or anything of the sort. He just wanted to help. He just wanted to help Anakin, even if Anakin didn’t think that his feelings were something that he needed help with. “We have a few minutes before we intercept our desired vessel.”

Tentatively, as if it would burn, Obi-Wan took both of Anakin’s hands. The young knight gently squeezed back. Obi-Wan’s gaze was on them for a long moment, rubbing a thumb in tight, light circles on the, studying the flesh hand as if he hadn’t really expected to see it.

“In four beats, through your diaphragm,” Obi-Wan instructed as he inhaled, expecting Anakin to follow. “Hold…. And out for eight.”

Anakin remembered this exercise. It had been years since he had done it, but he remembered it. He remembered the way Obi-Wan would breathe with him when he felt panicked or stressed. Most negative emotions really. He would go on and on, never stopping until Anakin told him and truly felt better. It never mattered how long it took, Obi-Wan had always been there with him, breathing in time with him.

Once upon a time, it had helped.

When had it stopped helping? When had he stopped doing it?

Did it at all? Or did Anakin just stop seeing the use, when he started using his negative emotions, when he saw them as useful and powerful. Had he started to see it as childish or another way Obi-Wan could control him?

Control him, Anakin nearly scoffed. As if he could. As if he wanted to.

Why were his emotions so heightened and negative when it came to Obi-Wan as of late? It had been like that for quite some time, he realized. He was constantly getting upset and angry with his former master and at this particular moment, Anakin could not recall in the foggiest why.

“In four beats,” Obi-Wan repeated and continued to rub circles on the top of Anakin’s hand delicately with his thumb. He focused on the touch, his gaze growing a bit bleary and hazy as he just watched Obi-Wan’s gloved hand move, his tough gentle and light. “Hold four, five, seven….and out one two three.”

They repeated several more times until they were completely in sync, breathing in time with one another, and Obi-Wan was no longer guiding the session. It was just them. As one. Two halves of the same whole.

Two halves of the same whole.

Kind of like the open circle fleet’s symbol.

Obi-Wan’s fleet.

Their fleet.

“It is time,” Obi-Wan said, breaking out of his train of thought. Anakin wished he had more time. He felt like he was getting somewhere. Not just with Obi-Wan, but with himself as well. He was supposed to realize something, he knew it. Something important. It would have to wait. “Do you feel better?” Obi-Wan asked.

It felt nice to be honest about it, and he nodded. “Yes, master.” He hadn’t remembered the last time something like this had helped. Really, he hadn’t remembered the last time he had even done something like this. Who told him that it wouldn’t help? Who told him that this was no longer a good thing? If someone like Obi-Wan was one to do it on a basis, someone as wise and good as him, would it not be good for Anakin as well?

He had so much more to think about.

“Then come, dear one,” Obi-Wan replied, gently. But there was a bit of an edge to it, something Anakin couldn’t quite identify. Perhaps it was just preparation on what was to come. Anakin didn’t really know if Obi-Wan felt something strong like he did about slavery, he doubted it. Obi-Wan hadn’t been a slave for any length of time, but that didn’t mean he had to like it either. The Jedi in general, were doing their best, even before the war, but it just wasn’t enough. With the restrictions in the senate, the illegal activities and simply their lack of numbers, there was only so much the jedi could do. Sometimes Anakin forgot that. “Go fetch your apprentice and meet me in the docking bay. We have a lot to do and an uncertain timetable,” he added. It was technically an order, but it hadn’t felt like it.

Resolute. Anakin nodded.

Ahsoka was raring to go, and they gathered a few soldiers to accompany them. No doubt Obi-Wan and Commander Cody were doing the same. Kix was anxious with the disappearance of Jesse and his other brothers and declared it would be best, in case either someone got hurt or they came across someone who was hurt. He was a good soldier and warrior anyways, even if he wasn’t a medic, Anakin probably would have brought him along. Appo was always a great addition. He was calm and smart, and he was good at keeping people together, although at the moment, they were all a little confused. Perhaps Obi-Wan had promoted him and didn’t tell him? He kept calling the sergeant, commander. It wasn’t completely out of character for Obi-Wan to promote someone and not tell them immediately. And then Dogma was with them as well. In their kerfuffle, he had just slid back into the 501st, looking over what had happened with Krell, keeping rather close to his commanders. Anakin wouldn’t hold it against him; he was trying to be loyal. He just had some bugs to work out, no big deal.

Several 212th boys were waiting with them, armed to the teeth and ready to fight. They had the same calm air that Obi-Wan usually carried around them with something else, as if they were chomping at the bit. Their eyes would darken into something violent and dangerous. This mission was personal. He could understand that. Anakin did realize most of them had been around their meditation study not a few hours prior. He remembered the way Obi-Wan had relaxed in their presence. He still hated that Obi-Wan had relaxed more with them than with Anakin himself, they were his troops, Anakin was his padawan, but he did comprehend something at least. Anakin had his go to’s and favorites, he supposed Obi-Wan did too.

It was an odd thing to think about.

Boarding the upcoming slave ship was rather easy. A single slave ship was no match for even one of the venator ships, much less two. The Negotiator and the Resolute boxed them quite easily and the gunships were off. And any crew of slavers was no match for a single squad of troopers, much less a squad led by a jedi.

Led by several jedi.

It didn’t mean the slaver did not try, however, because they did. Their efforts were a strange mix of amusing and annoying. They tried to shoot at them, threw smoke bombs and other small explosives. Closed normal and blast doors, others reinforced but no matter what, it wasn’t a match for the power and heat of their lightsabers. They could just burn through.

Anakin kept breathing.

He wouldn’t let his anger control him, not with Obi-Wan watching. He had so much to prove. He stayed rather close to his former master and Ahsoka ended up veering off with Master Vos. It wasn’t something that was particularly on his mind. He and Master Vos didn’t always get along but there was something he could trust him with, it was Ahsoka. After all, Master Vos had somehow raised someone as good as Aalya Secura, he must be somewhat decent.

Obi-Wan was…fighting different.

Anakin, he knew how Obi-Wan fought. They had sparred frequently, fought alongside one another constantly, Obi-Wan taught him and Anakin dared to think he had taught Obi-Wan a thing or two as well. They had always been well synced with one another, fighting together like one entity. Mostly because they had been fighting with other another for so long. And it wasn’t just in his padawanship, they were matched together often times during his knighthood too, during the war. Sure, Anakin was technically under Obi-Wan’s command, as the older jedi was a high general, but still, their groups meshed together well. The 501stand 212th worked seamlessly together, just like their generals did. At their best, together, they were an opponent to not be underestimated. One to be feared.

But here, now, it was different. He was different. It was not the same really, they weren’t quite as good. He shouldn’t say that. They were still fantastic, a foe and duo to be feared, undoubtedly, even with their step away from one another. But it wasn’t quite as right as Anakin knew it normally was. Not quite as in sync with each other’s moves as they were before. Oh, how things could change. In a day. Fifteen years. He didn’t like it.

Had it changed so suddenly? Or had this been a slow change? One that had been coming around?

Anakin had known Obi-Wan since he started seriously started practicing Soresu. It was a form he had mastered well. He knew that the older jedi had started off with Aratu, a form he had used against the Sith during the blockade of Naboo. Anakin had watched the security tapes over and over and over again. Many times. He had quickly after that switched over to another form. Anakin had watched as he weighed the pros and cons of each one before finally settling on Soresu, the defensive form. Anakin had asked him why once. He was so good at Aratu, even others had told him that. Obi-Wan had always just looked sad when it was brought up.

“There are so many holes in Aratu, nothing for defense,” he had said.

Anakin hadn’t completely understood it at the time. Of course, he had been ten at the time, so he didn’t really understand much but over time, he did sort of get it. Obi-Wan was haunted by the death of his master, his inability to protect him, although, looking over so many of the tapes so many times, Anakin knew there was nothing he could have done, even if Obi-Wan had been using Soresu during that period. He was trapped behind a barrier, alone.

Sometimes he wondered who was left alone. Had Obi-Wan just not been fast enough? Or had Qui-Gon just ran ahead, recklessly without heed?

Obi-Wan, turned out, was amazing at Soresu, and his demeanor shifted to accommodate that. He was patient and enduring. A good defensive form in contrast to Anakin’s own, more aggressive Shien form.

Soresu was built on defensive blocks and impenetrable shields, which Obi-Wan used to the fullest. It was possibly the most perfect fit for wartime, this wartime, especially against the blaster bolts they were constantly up against, as it was used to deflect and redirect attacks. It didn’t rely on raw power like some of the other forms, raw power that Anakin knew he himself had and Obi-Wan rather lacked.

But that did not make Obi-Wan any less dangerous.

But this…it was still Soresu, the one he was using now, was still identifiable, still the form, still a dance, still an impenetrable shield of defensive blocks…but there was something different about the way he moved. Technical. Mechanical. Something Anakin had never seen before

Soresu often times was criticized because of its lack of offensive attacks and strokes. What good was a defense if you could not defeat your enemy, only block them?

Anakin had thought that once. But he had seen Obi-Wan use that defense to defeat many enemies, including himself.

But this, what Obi-Wan was doing now, even though it was still Soresu, as Anakin could tell, but something was added. Something more raw and powerful, a bit more force behind actual blows that could take instead of just defend. It was Soresu but something was added, something Anakin had not really seen.

What had Obi-Wan done in the future?

He was further, just slightly out of sync with Anakin, a step forward. Was this a sign? Was he being left in the past? Had he lost Obi-Wan forever?

Obi-Wan had never been particularly cruel, sometimes even lacking efficiency in exchange for chance, for mercy and compassion. It had paid off on more than one occasion, even Anakin could admit that, as much as he wanted to just take people down. But that was not the case here. The Soresu master was a whirlwind – giving each of the slaver crew one chance and one chance only – if even that – to surrender and lay down arms. Of course, more often than not, they didn’t. Obi-Wan did not keep giving chances. He did not go out to kill either, Anakin could not imagine his old master doing that, but several slavers lost appendages and others incapacitated by other means. Some would not survive their wounds. Anakin found he didn’t mind.

Obi-Wan hadn’t even paused as he went through the halls, making a straight path to the bridge, where certainly the captain and his closest crew were holed up. They didn’t stand a chance. He barely gave Anakin time to redirect the power in the door to make it open before he went to strike his saber right through it. But when the door did open, he strode in, completely in charge, with a posture to match. There was an air of unyielding, of no chance at all. He did not care what they wanted, and he was not here to negotiate. He was here to take.

“Hello there,” he greeted, although his voice was hard and his tone rather bored with the entire scenario. The captain and a few others just stared, their hands on their weapons, pointed at them. Anakin smirked. “I am General Kenobi, and I am here to take over your ship and relieve you. You of the slaves.”

The captain tried to fight him. He charged and Anakin was all ready to fight back; with his saber at the ready to defend Obi-Wan and take the being down. But Obi-Wan put a gentle hand on his arm before spinning his saber, almost lazily. Anakin barely even saw it move. The captain was on the ground then, crumpled on the floor. Unconscious or dead, Anakin didn’t know. It didn’t matter.

“We must move quickly if we are to keep with the ship’s schedule,” he said and stepped over the slaver, away from him. The rest of the crew had surrendered, staring at their employer with such wide eyes, one might have thought they were no longer inhabiting their bodies. Anakin snarled at the slaver on the ground but bounced after his former master with renewed interest.

The cargo bay had quite a number of slaves in it, spreading several species and people. It was not a large ship by any means. It wasn’t as though Anakin had seen many ships, particularly, that were crowded with slaves, but there was a good dozen or two huddled together. They were cowering and kept to the walls, away from them, many chained to the walls. Obi-Wan just glanced at him, eyes soft and sympathetic and dragging him out to walk into the middle, with a translator droid hot on their heels, before tugging down for him to sit down with him. Anakin followed what he was doing.

Their level. Smaller, less threat. Taking off weapons and setting them away. Within sight of them so they could see. Everything laid bare, just like them.

“Frightened and scared beings act fairly universal,” Obi-Wan hummed under his breath, sad and tired.

He took a breath and told the droid to translate for any of the slaves who did not speak basic.

“My name is jedi Obi-Wan Kenobi and we are here to help you,” he started, his voice gentle and kind, but loud enough for those who knew the language to hear it. Beside him, the droid called out in another language that Anakin wasn’t entirely sure he knew. “In a few minutes, you can be taken aboard a Republic cruiser, where your chips and collars will be deactivated and removed. You may eat and rest and will be given clothes. Troopers will come around to ask what you would like to do moving forward,” he gave a pause, allowing the droid to translate the passage. The slaves look tentative. “You may accompany my troopers to Coruscant where you will stay at the Jedi Temple until you can start new lives where you would like, contact families and home worlds if you have them or find a new place to settle.”

Anakin just stared at his master, silently. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting really. Was this it? Was this not? His head was swimming.

“Over there is Sergeant Barlex,” Obi-Wan said, gesturing beside him as he continued and the droid relayed the words, even pointing over to the clone as well. Anakin looked up and sure enough, several clone troopers stood by him, none of which had their weapons on them at the moment. He made a gesture, and the troopers removed their helmets, revealing their generally identical faces. Anakin stared at them, reaching out, as if he could just memorize them right here and right now. These were some of the troopers that Obi-Wan cared for, that he trusted and loved. Anakin should trust them too, at the very least. Because he did, to some extent, have to. Trust them with Obi-Wan’s life, especially when he was not around. “He and troopers Gearshift, Crys and Threepwood will be assisting you.”

Carefully and slowly, Anakin stood up and he walked over to one of the slaves, kneeling down in front of them, keeping his hands where they could see him and telegraphed his movements. He gave them some bread that he tucked away in his robe and handed out pieces for them to share. “There is plenty more where that came from,” he promised. He wasn’t entirely sure if they could understand his words, but they seemed to get his meaning.

“Please do be kind to them, Sergeant,” he heard Obi-Wan’s voice behind him.

“Of course, sir,” the trooper replied, curtly, but his voice was surprisingly understanding, and kind, despite the gruffness of it. “Keep yourself alive. And bring our kid back home, would you?”

Our kid? Anakin hadn’t known that some of the 212th troopers already knew Luke. Already knew him enough to like him, to be a bit rather protective. Was it that easy and simple to bond with them? Could Anakin have that with even Obi-Wan’s troops so effortlessly?

Obi-Wan nearly laughed. “Of course, sergeant. You quite like him, don’t you?”

Barlex shrugged as Anakin made his way back over to them, upon giving several slaves a few things of bread. He had kind of stuffed his pockets and robes and sleeves with them. Water wouldn’t have kept in the battle or a fight, but food was the next best thing. “He’s a good kid. Strong head on his shoulders. Calm, determined. Not a great listened, sneaking off with Lieutenant Waxer’s platoon but, well, it seems to run in the family.” He almost even sounded amused. That didn’t seem normal for the trooper from what he could tell.

Anakin’s former master snorted. “Ah, you have no idea, Sergeant,” he chuckled.

“We’ve got this, sir,” another trooped nodded next to him. “We will get all the people off the ship pronto so you and the others can move on schedule.”

Another nod. “Thank you, Threepwood.”

“Gearshift is rounding up the crew, preparing for departure.”

“Departure?” Anakin asked, curiously.

“Since we cannot technically free slaves and take down slavers due to the Chancellor’s emergency powers,” Obi-Wan growled, more than just a bit bitter. Anakin continued to be mildly surprised. He wondered why that was. “We will…ahem…convince and persuade them to abandon the people and scatter.”

“We cannot arrest them?” Anakin hissed.

“The Chancellor says he does not want to strain relationships with the Hutts and other powerful entities,” Quinlan Vos snorted as he and Anakin’s padawan walked up and united with them. She was practically bouncing, her eyes fiery with justice and a readiness to battle. “So, he’s been easy on their…employees and their occupation of choice.”

Anakin swallowed. That…could not be right.

That could not be right. No way that…

His thoughts were interrupted by Obi-Wan’s next words, his voice growing loud, as if he was trying to drown out Anakin’s thoughts. “Are there any other beings or things aboard that need to be moved?”

Anakin was technically paying attention, but his eyes were on the slaves that were gently being led by the troopers, sans their weapons, off the ship and towards the larger vessels. Someone had landed the Negotiator already, so the people were being led straight into the docking bay, away from the horrid place that was once a slave ship.

One of the troopers did have his weapon, but he was rounding up those that were obviously slavers and masters. Anakin stared at him for a long moment. The gear tattoo on him was interesting in some mundane, distracting way. It almost looked like was moving, like real gears.

“A few animals,” Ahsoka replied, easily. “Not any big ones, but a few small ones. Generally friendly.”

“Probably used as pets,” Obi-Wan mused. “Commander, can you get one of the boys to start hauling any living thing off as well? I don’t want to have to worry about any of them when we move on.”

Anakin imagined the trooper nodded but he was watching everything else instead.

“Anakin?”

He startled and turned around. Everyone was staring at him. “Huh?”

“I called your name a couple of times. Are you alright?” Obi-Wan asked, still hesitant, but no less worried.

He frowned. “I can handle myself.”

“That is not in question,” his former master cleared his throat as he spoke carefully, like he wasn’t sure what to say or how to say it. It almost made Anakin scowl because Obi-Wan had never been this uncertain about and around him before. It was incredibly frustrating. “But I know this situation is difficult for you and that is completely understandable. It is not a question of your ability, dear one.”

Anakin nearly melted right then and there. Obi-Wan froze, only for a brief second, as though he hadn’t realized he had said the sweet endearment. Had it been such a while since Obi-Wan had called him that? For him, he supposed, it had been fifteen years. For Anakin…had it been long? Why did he stop? Did he stop at all or did Anakin just stop paying attention?

“Anakin?”

He blinked. “Sorry, what?”

“Are you sure you want to go to Zygerria?”

“I went the last time, didn’t I?”

Obi-Wan hesitated and glanced away briefly before looking back straight at him. He looked so concerned. Was he worried that Anakin would fall apart right then and there? When Obi-Wan needed him in the heat of the middle of the mission? He wouldn’t, of course, and Obi-wan’s lack of faith disturbed him more than he cared to admit. Anakin wondered what had happened last time; if he had let Obi-Wan down in such a way. “Yes,” he replied, cautious and slow. “And suffice to say, it did not particularly end well on any notion of the time.”

“What happened?”

The older man swallowed and glanced at Master Vos. Anakin huffed. Of course, he knew. “Did you tell Master Vos?”

“No,” Obi-Wan mumbled. “He just knows me. We have been friends for quite some time, if you recall.” Oh, he could. “And aside from rescuing the colonists of Kiros, the mission before did not go particularly well. It was different than what we are doing now of course, but no one was put in a good position, least of all you.”

He wanted to bristle. He really did, but the look on Obi-Wan’s face made him stop. Something had changed. Maybe it was the look on his face or maybe it was the way Anakin was seeing that look on his face. Like, something he hadn’t quite noticed before. It was as if he could see what Luke was talking about. The grief, the infinite sadness. Had Anakin put that on him? It wasn’t pity, but rather empathy, of kindness and just wanting better for him, not about him.

Obi-Wan didn’t mean anything poorly by it, Anakin thought to himself and for some reason, that realization just floored him. He was just trying to protect him. Even if he didn’t want him to, even if Anakin could protect himself, Obi-Wan continued to do so. Was it really because Obi-Wan didn’t think he could do it himself, that he didn’t have the faith in Anakin’s abilities? Or was he just so used to it that it was just second nature. Obi-Wan had spent over ten years protecting him, teaching him. He supposed that wasn’t something he could just turn off. But then again, after all, wasn’t Anakin trying to do the same thing, all the time.

“I’ll be okay,” he vowed, walking back over to them and taking his place at Obi-Wan’s side before anyone else could snatch it from him, shooting a bit of a glare at Master Vos and the other troopers, pointedly trying to avoid Ahsoka so she would not see it. “And if I’m not, I will tell you.”

That surprised his former master, but his expression was quickly washed away by calm and pleasant gratitude. “Alright, I believe you.”

Anakin swallowed. He would not lie to Obi-Wan.

[valaks]

Hey Valaks! I love your blog and your writing!

Please could you do 1, 10 and 18 for the writing asks?? 🌺

Thank you for the ask! I have added a cut to hopefully not be that person clogging up the feed XD

1. Tell us about your current project(s) – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

I have a few collabs outstanding like Gemini and a Kabir/Alex sequel to Reunion (It’s rated T at the most so still kid friendly) with Lupin and Devil Went Down to Georgia with Galimau. My utter love for both of my collab partners for pulling me through at a time when I’ve been really struggling. I have a WIPs List but I’ll confess to not having touched most of them in quite sometime (partly from life, partly because I’m not sure how interesting they’d be to anyone else other than me which influences my writing more than I would like to admit):

Good Intentions: Smithers never thought he’d be anyone’s moral compass, he was no angel to sit in anyone’s shoulder but trying to keep Alex Rider from following in the ruthless footsteps of his father or worse his former handler, Alan Blunt is as close to hell as he can imagine. (Wherein Alex becomes head of MI6 we watch his morality slip away form the eyes of an increasingly frustrated and heartbroken Smithers - it all culminates when Alex uses a child “just as an informant, simple information gathering” but hidden behind the charming smile of John Rider and the brutal coldness of Alan Blunt’s words is Alex Rider dying as he says them (Smithers just hopes there’s still a part of the boy he once knew in there to mourn)

Walk the Line: Alex thought he was done with SCORPIA. But they kept creeping back into his life in the most unexpected of ways. He thought he could at least count on it being on the other side until he gets teamed up with Walker, his former classmate and current CIA spy. Unfortunately he still hasn’t been able to figure out whose side Walker is really on - attempted deep cover op like his dad, repatriated rogue spy back on the “good” side, or SCORPIA double agent? He doesn’t know but at least he’s nice....in that obnoxious American way.

Temperamental: (Sequel to Sentimental which isn’t all that popular and you would need to read it for the sequel but basically amnesiac Yassen whose memories stop pre John’s betrayal set during the Stormbreaker mission and features him trying to come to grips with the use of chemical weapons against children and how to handle Alex once he snaps back to reality which is where this starts) Yassen had promised Alex Rider that he would be safe from the world of spying but fate had other ideas. In the days after Sarov’s failed plan, Yassen scrambles to find where MI6 have hidden his wayward charge without drawing Rothman’s attention. A request from one of their existing clients to look into suspicious activity at his son’s former school prompts Yassen to investigate under the guise of offering security. He should have known where there was trouble there would be Alex.

10. How would you describe your writing process?

Lordy do I ever not have a good answer for this. Typically it involves an idea hitting me and then the determination: would this idea work better as a short to post on tumblr (because the set up would take away the tension or would require a multi chapter which is not really my strength), as a prompt to lob out into the ether for someone better and brighter to touch on, or a fic. Once fic is decided I determine whose perspective the fic would be the most interesting from either because it would create the most tension or their internal monologue/background knowledge would add the most to it. Then the summary is written and a title is chosen. If it’s something I’m really passionate about and I already have it in my head I tend to write it all in one go, if there’s more I need to chew on then it’s a series of dates with the Evil Writing App. The final determination is whether it’s good enough for Valaks or if it gets sent to an alt account.

18. Do any of your stories have alternative versions? (plotlines that you abandoned, AUs of your own work, different characterisations?) Tell us about them.

Allegedly. I’ll try to go in order of posting -

Ruthless has a sequel where Alex just goes *quiet* once the initial dust as settled it’s unnerving to everyone because they’re not used to having to wonder just what Alex is thinking, at least not behind closed doors but what happened isn’t exactly something that can be recovered from easily, not when Alex isn’t sure who all’s in on it no matter what they’ve told him. Failure is the AU where I considered what would happen to Alex to make him want to torture.

Alibi was originally going to have Yassen show up in the end but I found it far more fascinating if MI6 was just testing Alex so out went Yassen and in went Ben. The sequel to it was torn apart and turned into Warm Reception because I wanted to trope flip SCORPIA comes to Brooklands and decided that it was more logical to have a small fight in Mrs. Bedfordshire’s lobby than anywhere else and I wanted to explore some side characters instead of Ben.

Providence’s sequel thoughts ended up inspiring Gentleman’s Agreement but I did write a small short for it “Yassen and Alex encounter each other on mission. Surprisingly they are working to mostly the same goal - Yassen needs to kill the millionaire who Alex needs to get information from. “I suppose I could answer some questions for you, Sasha. /In Russian/“ “Is now really the time for a language lesson?” he ground out in frustration but the man pointedly ignored him “/Fine but I don’t know some of the words/“ “/Then there is no better way to learn/“

I mentioned the Sentimental sequel but changing Sarov to come first and probable for almost a month before Yassen figures out he’s missing made the most sense. It was also a bit of fun at the Yassen would absolutely take Alex away from MI6....just to throw him in a school and throw away the key. Almost had him send him to Point Blanc but decided that wouldn’t quite fit all that well and wouldn’t be as interesting as if Alex had already gotten his feet back under him with MI6 and now sees that Yassen was right that MI6 would just use him until he’s dead but that doesn’t mean Alex wants to be anywhere near Yassen. Julia Rothman might have other ideas when she finds out what her newest second in command is hiding.

Gentleman’s Agreement.....there’s a lot of thoughts on Sequels and AUs, a lot of them have been written by better people, but that fic was written in 45 minutes so there wasn’t much time to recharacterize or change scenes. It did get Turncoat aka the Alex saves Yassen fic I wanted so badly.

Blood Brothers is a fic I really worked hard on considering how John would feel about his son being thrown into SCORPIA assuming Alex was of age. A rocky marriage was characterization that didn’t quite fit what I imagined would have happened but did fit the story so it stayed in. It was a fic that was supposed to get expanded on - the competition between Hunter and Yassen and Nile and Alex who is desperate to beat his Dad and his “apprentice”. I think two teenagers thrown against each other with a bit of a bone to pick, especially Yassen and Alex who can both hold a grudge even if one runs hot and the other runs cold, would have been compelling and a little fun but the premise and specifically John’s characterization doesn’t quite work out to me.

Found and Legends both have their plotting done but it’ll never see the light of day

Little Moments and Sweetest Thing were my guilty pleasure writing pieces for a while and I have about 1000 DMs of scenes for both of them that are lost to the sands of time and an embarrassing amount of self indulgence

Mates has a follow up ending for those who needed resolution in the comments of it. I’m not sure I did a good job of showing that Tom was in a semi abusive relationship since a lot of people seemed to blame him for him and Alex’s breakup. Most of my headcanons for how their relationship goes have them splitting much sooner just because of Tom’s own home life and either being unable to relate/talk to Alex and drifting away because his Mom throwing a plate at his head isn’t being hung over crocodiles but that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt or because Alex is just too dangerous/jumpy to be thrown back into a school environment and lashes out even unintentionally especially not under the pressure of being seen as a failure. School is also a barometer of just how much he’s lost of himself and his childhood, bonus points for Alex being completely upfront with Tom about everything he’s done

In My Sights has an AU where this is all post Christmas at Gunpoint and Yassen is there because he knows Ian is already at Sayle’s factory and will have to be...handled. So two weeks of just getting Alex trained for the protection he might need, connecting him to resources, etc. Ian finding out that Yassen had been there was part of a draft at one point which was included Alex wondering about an all too sincere goodbye from Ian “who never hugged him” but I can’t find the snippet anymore ;__;

A Warm Reception was an alternate version. Originally I wanted it to be Alex watching his last chance at normality slip from his fingers and then the crushing realization that it was something that was his own doing, not even MI6 but Skoda who he had picked a fight with and the accompanying breakdown but then decided that Mrs. Bedfordshire was the right way to go upon writing the summary. Because everyone loves some Outsider POV

Adopted was supposed to be a one chapter throw away trope flip of K Unit adopts Alex. I kept it pretty consistent with Amitai and Lil Lupin’s K Units, tried to add in some more characterization just in how they treated some of the details. It has an alt ending/chapter where they find out Alex is Cub when they pull him from Three’s tender mercies almost by accident. I was persuaded into light humored fluff via guilt trip.

The Truth and Other Deadly Weapons has Ben acting exactly like he think he would in front of everyone but my AU was that this interaction happened in the field and absolutely shattered Ben’s trust in him partly because he had worked for the other side and partly because even if it ‘wasn’t as bad as it looks’ it showed a severe lack of judgment. It also featured several chapters of Alex running into the glass ceiling that is having “Member Malogosto Class of 2004” on your resume. Was going to feature Alex running into Walker as well and into problems within MI6 and the CIA but that was eventually cut and it was kept to one chapter.

Guardian....Guardian holds a very special place in my heart. I was given the prompt of a Monster Fic and I wrote what I knew but the interesting parts were all the ones that come after the story but might come across to a general audience as Hogwarts School of Prayers and Miracles. The plotting done post this was going to feature baby Angel Alex reuniting with his parents but...they were strangers to him and so he stayed with Yassen more and more, followed him, learned from him....it encompassed everything from the dynamics of broken families to reflections on theology and references from the Good Book....which is why it’ll never see the fandom but has a very special place in my heart.

In another, more perfect world Glocking Around the Christmas Tree is the Die hard fic this fandom deserves but as Lupin and I untangled the plot of the movie more and more we just couldn’t make it into anything that would be coherent on paper so it was changed and changed and is now a half finished sad abomination that sits on my works list only because Lupin would kill me if I took it down.

Hot Shot was supposed to feature my current favorite character that is not Nile Abara, John Crawley but I wimped out and changed it at the end because I swore I would write the Crawley fic that we all need. Hear me out: John Crawley knew and worked with John and Ian Rider, was respected by both of them, was recruited by SCORPIA within one year in the field, is the Chief of Staff of MI6, the man who “no one gets a knife in the back without him signing off” and is also the man who walks his dog to check on Alex. There’s a mentorship waiting to happen there, preferably in a nice work study program during college where Alex finally gets to see the repercussions of his missions and Crawley helps try and pull him back from the black mark that SCORPIA would have put on him.

My personal fluffy favorite is the spinoff of Devil Went Down to Georgia where Joe Byrne did pull Alex out post Skeleton Key and brought him home. There’s a pretty extended one about where Tom ends up after Mates. There’s also an actual sequel but ask me no questions and all.

Skipping a few collabs and Febuwhump fics but Burning Questions was just supposed to be Branded - a fic where upon being captured by Razim he is brought in and forcibly branded to differentiate the appearances of Alex and Julius (since Razim has decided to have him killed after shooting the Secretary of State). As a result of the pain levels spiking when Alex actually sees that the SCORPIA logo is branded onto his cheek Razim considers that emotional pain might be something to investigate. There’s a couple thousand words on it, one day I might polish it up.

First Impressions is supposed to be a mirror verse of Alex working for MI6 which includes Three as Blunt, Rothman as Jones and of course Sagitta as K Unit while he’s up against his father as Yassen and Yassen as Crawley. But it was cut down significantly even if the ideas are pretty fun to consider.

Sorry this was probably more than you bargained for but it was fun to get everything out there so thank you for asking

[belovedbangtan]

Dive

Pairings: Jungkook x y/n, Yoongi x oc

Word Count: 3.1k

Description: Camping with your ex, sounds horrible right? The camping trip was planned and payed for long before y/n’s shitty boyfriend broke up with her. Her best friend Abby, Yoongi, Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook are there to make sure she has an amazing time. However, sharing a tent with a smoke show like Jungkook is bound to lead to some complications.

Warnings: Language, Mentions of anxiety, drinking, that’s is for this chapter!

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“I just don’t think we’re the right fit,” His voice was calm. Too calm in your opinion. You didn’t bother to ask questions, but he insisted on explaining why. Of course, he was trying to make you feel better about the situation, but him rambling on about how your lifestyles didn’t align was not something you wanted to hear. He wanted to get drunk every weekend and spend daddy’s money, while you were too tired to even think about drinking. You didn’t have a safety net to rely on and that was something that he would never understand. It didn’t make the blow hurt any less. You knew the relationship was getting rocky. When it was bad, he turned a blind eye, but when it was good, it was really good. Your mother told you that the way you ignored serious problems would end up biting us in the ass. You groaned as you realize that means you have to tell her she was right all along. He handed you your box of things and you can’t believe there wasn’t more in the box. After a year of sleeping at his house, you could fit everything in a small box. Part of your brain knew this would happen; it anticipated your flame burning out.

You close the door behind him and you sift through the box. You scoff picking up the frame that held a picture of you both. Remembering when he showed it to you. You were in awe as he complimented your figure, claiming “That’s when I knew I loved you”. You take the frame instantly throwing it into the trash can, along with the other keepsakes he assumed you would want to keep. You laugh to yourself finally being able to realize what a pretentious douche bag he was. The tears staining your cheek are confusing you. You did love him, you just weren’t in love with him. It hurt nonetheless.

You throw yourself onto the bed letting the memories of the past year overwhelm you. You might as well get this out of the way. You decide to call your best friend, Abby, the one who introduced you to Ben. The dial tone rings out and you still try to sort out how you feel. Within minutes of talking on the phone, she decided she’s coming over. Even though you insist that you’re fine, she knows you well enough, and you’ll never say no to ice cream.

“What a fucking douche,” Abby mumbles shoving a spoon of ice cream into her mouth. You reach over dipping your own spoon in. You were adults now; you didn’t even bother with bowls.

“Tell me about it,” you roll your eyes, leaning back onto the couch, “I’m pissed I have that whole camping trip next week paid for..”

She cuts you off immediately, “No, fuck that. You’re still coming.”

You sit up quickly, eyebrows scrunching together, “You’re delusional if you think I’m coming on that trip.”

“You’re delusional if you think you’re going to let him control your life, you’re coming and that’s that!” she points a finger in your direction.

“I don’t even have any camping gear. He was the one that had all of that stuff.” You explain as you pick up the quart of ice cream, walking it over to your freezer. Of course, you were excited to go on this trip. Abby couldn’t stop talking about how much fun it had been last year. Tons of people all camped out, getting drunk out of their minds. She told me about how the last night they would all skinny dip in the river at midnight. You cringed when she first told you about it, but now it sounded revitalizing. You couldn’t get past the fact that Ben would be there. He would without a doubt try to make you feel bad for coming since it was mostly his group of friends. Not to mention how would you feel watching him as he throws himself at the single chicks.

“I can ask Jungkook if he’ll share his tent. His friend was supposed to come but bailed,” She instantly started to text him.

“No, no, no,” You rush over trying to take her phone from her hands, but she was too quick, “Abby, I’ve only met Jungkook once and it didn’t seem like he liked me very much.”

She looks down at her phone as it dings, the corners of her mouth raise as her brows do, “Well, he doesn’t mind. It’s settled you’ll come. You can sleep in Kook’s tent, and you’ll hang out with me and Yoongi’s friends.”

You see, Abby was dating Yoongi. Through Yoongi, Abby met all of his friends from College. To be honest you still didn’t quite understand how Ben and his group of friends became friends with Yoongi and his group of friends. A year ago, Abby invited you to a birthday party and Ben was there. He was so persistent about taking you on a date, you gave in. He turned on the charm, he was the picture-perfect boyfriend. As soon as you fell for him, it was like he didn’t feel the need to try anymore. So, he stopped. He stopped planning dates for you, and simply started going out with his friends again. That was about seven months into the relationship. Eight months into the relationship you found messages from a girl he claimed to work with. Clearly that was all bullshit. You wondered how a relationship could go from good to bad in a matter of months, but it happened; and you regret falling for him in the first place. You had met Yoongi’s friends before and they were always pleasant, you just hoped that they would be more authentic than Ben and the group of uptight assholes he calls his friends.

It was confusing to you but Abby explained that there where about 25-30 people coming, but they would mostly stay in their own friend groups. You assumed you would know most of the people in Ben’s group, you just hoped they would ignore you.

You zone out, you mind flooding with all of the worst possible outcomes. Abby rambles on about how you’ll love getting to know all of the boys. How they’ll welcome you with open arms. You had met them before, they were incredible humans. However, it didn’t make you forget that your ex-boyfriend would be there too. You finally focus on her words, and you listen as she brags about all of the exciting things to look forward to.  After a while her enthusiasm makes you forget the bad. Genuine excitement starts to run through your veins. She was right, you deserved this trip just as much as he did. You were going to have a good time despite him and that was that.

 Friday came faster than you anticipated. You threw yourself into work, leaving your brain little time to think about your broken heart. Or the potential disaster this weekend could be. Abby calls you letting you know that they’ll be outside to pick you up shortly. You grab your luggage and give yourself a once over in the mirror. It was particularly hard deciding what to wear today. How do you dress when you want to make your ex jealous, but you’re also in the woods and sweating your ass off? Cut off jean shorts, a plain white crop top, with a buffalo plaid tied around your waist. Your hair in loose waves, you tousled it with your fingers before sliding the black baseball cap over your hair. Before you have the chance to freak out and change your entire outfit you hear honking outside. You grab your bag filled with blankets and a pillow and you toss your backpack over your shoulder.

The door to the SUV flings open to show a beautiful blonde man on the other side, Jimin. You remembered Jimin the most from previous gatherings, he was always attempting to create a conversation. He yells your name in excitement, instantly making you feel more at ease. Last thing you wanted was any additional drama or tension between you and whoever. He pulls you into a warm hug. After he puts your things in the trunk, you both hop into the back seat.

Abby turns around and looks you up and down, sliding her sunglasses down her nose slightly.

“You’re cute. I like it… it’s like,” she tilts her head as she scans her brain for the right words, “casual, but still make my ex kinda jelly.” You nodded in response, laughing to yourself. Sometimes you felt like you shared a brain cell. With that Abby punched the Campsite address into the GPS and we were on our way.

“So are you nervous?” Jimin asks quietly.

“Kinda,” You suck your bottom lip into your mouth, “but honestly I just want to have fun. It’s really not about making him jealous or anything. I just want to do me, and he can do whatever he wants.” You shrug before looking up to Jimin, a devilish smile starting to take over his face.

“I’ll make sure you have the best time. No unnecessary ex- boyfriend drama,” his smile is sincere, and you can tell that he means what he says, “I’m serious. You don’t have to worry about stupid shit. Just have a good time.” His hand lightly grazes your arm.

He barely hears your ‘thank you’ as Abby turns the radio on full volume, then Yoongi instantly turns it down. She glares at him and his stoic face shows he’s unfazed by her ferocity. You giggle at their interaction; you’ve never met two people who leveled each other out more. They were perfect for each other and exactly what you hoped you and Ben would be. It was never like that though, your chemistry was never something anyone would be jealous of.

A few hours, and a many snacks later you finally pulled into the camp site. Your stomach drops when you see your ex’s car lined up among the rest of them. You take a deep breathe, staying in the car a moment longer when everyone else gets out to unpack their things. In the middle of giving yourself a pep talk, your door is pulled open by the one and only, Kim Taehyung.

His smile is one to make you forget, and that’s exactly what it does.

“What’s the hold up, beautiful?” He reaches across you to unbuckle your seatbelt, and you don’t have time to panic, “Don’t worry, Jimin briefed me. Operation ‘Good Time’ is a-go.” He quickly looks left and right over dramatically. You can’t stop the laugh that surfaces. He was fucking hilarious and you thanked the heaven that you didn’t need to explain yourself or your situation. Even though you were sure that Abby had probably blabbed about the entire situation to all of them. It didn’t matter though, they were making this experience exactly what you wanted it to be. He takes your hand pulling you from the car, making obscene secret agent sounds as he rounds the car to the trunk, Yoongi and Jimin both giving him the weirdest look.

You scan the area around the campsite, your eyes wanting to find him, but your head and heart knowing that you wouldn’t like what you saw. Suddenly your eyes were frozen on someone else. His long hair in a tiny ponytail on top of his head as he rolled the tent from the bag. The tattoos on his arms giving him an edge that he didn’t have before. His entire demeanor was making your body warm. Of course, you remember Jungkook, you remember how rude Ben was to him. You sigh before taking your bags and deciding to walk over, the least you could do was help him set it up.

“Hey roomie.” You say instantly regretting it as it left your lips, he made you forget how to think.

He chuckles as he looks up, brushing a few stray hairs away from his face, “Hey! I should be done in a few minutes.” He says popping together the pieces of the tent like a pro.

“Let me help!” you set your bags down and you move to his side. He hands you a piece to put together, and he demonstrates how to do it. The muscles on his forearms making your knees weak. What the fuck was happening here, it had been so long since you’ve felt this way for someone. Another reason to be thankful that things had ended between you and Ben.

Almost as if he heard your internal dialogue, you hear him. Your eyes shoot up to see him shot gunning a beer with his close circle. You groan, mumbling ‘fucking douche’ under your breath, but apparently loud enough for Jungkook to hear.

His eyes peak over at you and he can’t help but laugh at your response, “You’re not wrong.” He agrees quietly. You nod your head agreeing with him.

The tent is finally together and you start to put your things inside. Jungkook rolls out a queen size blow up mattress and you instantly regret the tiny sleeping bag you brought. You might have fucked up.

“Are you sleeping on that?” Jungkook’s eyes are wide as he kneels next to the mattress using a battery powered pump to bring it to life.

“Uhm, yeah. I guess I didn’t get the memo,” You giggle at your pathetic 5th grade sleep over set up.

He looks at his mattress then looks down as if he isn’t sure of what to say, “Well this is a Queen, we can share if you want.”

“Oh my gosh, no. You’re already sharing your tent,” You shake your head, even though you know deep down that’s exactly where you want to end up.

“The offers on the table,” His tongue pokes the side of his cheek as the corners of his mouth turn into a smile, “Besides, having you in bed with me wouldn’t be the worst thing.” He turns his head biting his lip gently as he laughs quietly. You giggle nervously in return because it’s all you can do. You’re positive your cheeks are burning red, and there’s a wetness between your legs suddenly. You excuse yourself to get your other bag, and possibly smack Abby for failing to brief you on the smoke show that is Jeon Jungkook. Asshole, you knew he was attractive but, what the actual fuck.

Abby was sitting on Yoongi’s lap while Taehyung and Jimin were setting up the tent. A tent fit for royalty. It was massive compared to the one you were sharing with Jungkook, but you definitely weren’t complaining about the smaller shared space. Frankly, you were thankful for it. You walked over to your friend and flicked her on the back of her head. She ducked down and covered her head, “What the fuck was that for?!” She screamed.

“For many reasons!” You start yelling at her in a whispered tone, “one, you didn’t tell me to bring one of those blow up thingies.”

“Oh fuck. My bad, what else?” she rolls her eyes, still not feeling the abuse was necessary.

Your eyes widen and you point your head in a different direction, she quickly got the hint. You grabbed her arm once she was safely out of Yoongi’s lap, pulling her to where no one could hear you.

“So, I met Jungkook. He might have asked me to sleep with him?” you say questioning yourself entirely. Now that you say it aloud… were you dreaming that happened?

“Excuse me… what?” She scrunches her brows together grabbing your arms.

“Not like… sex. But to sleep on his mattress… but he could have meant sex?” You were genuinely confused.

“Ah!” She squeals and quickly checks her surroundings, “Okay, so he’s single and YOUR single. I’ve been waiting for this!” She squeaks, speaking too fast for anyone else to comprehend what was happening. She starts to ramble on about setting you and Jungkook up and you quickly stop her. That wasn’t what you came here for. You didn’t come to rebound in a tent a few feet away from your very recent ex-boyfriend. You came to have fun. Simple as that. She lets it go but insist that you shouldn’t deny it. ‘It’ being the undeniable connection Jungkook and I apparently had. You rolled your eyes but, you hoped she was right. You hoped that you left this weekend with more than memories. Hopefully the connection you made with Jungkook, Taehyung, Jimin and Yoongi would be something that would make all of the awkwardness worth it.

 As the sun fell behind the tall trees, the temperature dropped quick. Around what felt like 11 at night, mostly everyone was done for the day. Maybe not everyone but you certainly were. After watching Ben hit on every girl with a pulse you were exhausted. Tae and Jimin distracted you for a bit with a game of sand volleyball, but that only contributed to your exhaustion. You told everyone you were going to sleep. You unzipped the tent and you pulled on a pair of sweatpants and a swapped your crop top for a t-shirt. As you unzip your sleeping bag you look at the air mattress. For a half a second you debated on falling asleep on it, but then deciding it might be awkward when Jungkook finally comes to sleep. Maybe he was kidding about sharing the bed with you. You really didn’t know him well enough to decipher when he was being sarcastic or serious. Even if you knew he was serious, would you do it? You snuggle up in your sleeping bag, wishing you would have at least brought another cover with you. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t imagining what it would feel like to have Jungkook as your own personal heater. Having is arms pulling you into his body, maybe feeling his lips against yours. Eventually your exhaustion takes over and you fall asleep with some not so PG images in your head.

You’re woken up a few hours later to the sound of the tent being unzipped. You see Jungkook climb inside through the slits of your eyes. You’re eyes close as you hear him rustling around in his bag, probably looking for pajamas. You turn away from him, realizing how cold you are you start to shiver. You take the edges of the blanket and pull them up to cover your nose. You forget about Jungkook until you feel a large blanket covering your body. You hear him shuffle back onto the air mattress and you want to sit up and give it back to him. Maybe tell him you can both use it. You’re too tired to be that ballsy though, you slowly start to fall asleep again.

A/N: So float trips are really popular where I’m from, so i’m sorry if you have no idea what i’m referring to! Hopefully our mood board helps with some imagery! Please let me know what you think!!

[samwritesforyou]

Booked (pt.2)

Summary: you decided to go grocery shopping since the amount of people in your house significantly grew and diego keeps you company. after that crazy hargreeves family prompts you for a beach trip?

Warnings: gender-neutral reader

Wordcount: 2.1k

A/N: this fic is making me feel things, i cant quite place it. like... whenever i write it i feel weirdly at home?? idk :D feel free to share your thoughts either in tags or comments! its Very appreciated and motivating, actually! have a lovely day! <3

part one can be found here!

“Okay but if we kill them, nobody will have any questions, will they? We just bought a house and they moved somewhere far away!” was the first thing you heard, as you have awakened from your “nap”, deciding to keep your eyes shut just for a moment longer, not to lose it again.

“Five!” seems like everyone else said that in unison, grunting and groaning.

Okay, they don’t want to kill you. That’s great. You think it’s safe to open your eyes now.

You were laying on the king-sized bed upstairs, all siblings huddled up around you, watching intensely.

All the chatter between them came to a stop when they noticed that you woke up.

“So.. you’re like all superheroes or something?” you said tiredly, despite feeling rested.

Your mind still felt fuzzy from that info, hearing about such thing only from the tv series or sci-fi genres.

“Guess so,” Luther piped up, shrugging his massive shoulders and offering you a small smile.

Your eyes slowly drifted towards the kid standing by the frame of the bed, wearing a serious expression.

He sighed and frowned at you.

“To be clear, I’m not a kid and I’m actually older than all of you here. I’m a time traveller and I witnessed more in my life than any of you,” his passive-aggressiveness was directed at you, but by the choice of words it felt like he was talking to everyone who was present in the room, “There’s going to be an apocalypse by the end of the summer and our job is to stop it. We failed once, but we won’t fail twice. We rented this house, thinking it would be a good place where we can practise our powers without anyone interfering with us, so please,” his face turned into an exaggerated, wide smile, “don’t get in our way nor mention it to anybody. Thank you,” and as he finished his angry monologue, the blue colour filled the space around him as he disappeared in the thin air, right in front of your eyes.

Hm. Okay?

Only two seconds passed after that, when another sibling started talking to you.

“And I can talk with the dead!” he said happily, spreading his hands in the air like so monk preaching.

“We have a dead brother who’s named Ben and one day I will definitely let you two meet once I learn how to properly conjure him,” he concluded, very pleased with himself.

“Hi, Ben,” you just said with a warm smile on your face, somewhere into the air next to Klaus.

He literally cooed at your action, coming over to you and giving you a quick hug with a pat on the back.

“Okay, maybe we can reveal all our powers later, but let’s leave (y/n) to rest a bit, alright?” Allison proposed, rushing everyone out of the room and then just sparing you a wave and an apologetic smile, closing the doors and leaving you alone.

Maybe you can get used to all this madness. To this family.

You really rested after that.

A room had a roof-window, so laying on that bed allowed you to look up at the sky and lazy, white clouds that every so often rolled along with the blue background.

Soon enough you heard muffled chatter downstairs, this old house being absolutely the worst in being soundproof.

It all reminded you of simpler times, actually, no matter the crazy circumstances.

But enough was enough, and closer to the middle of the day you managed to get out of the bed and descend to the first floor by the wooden stairs, looking around.

Suddenly it seemed quiet.

You shrugged at that and just made your way towards the door, energetically jumping down the few stairs from the veranda and felt your feet hit the hard tartan surface.

Since it was six (plus one spiritually) more people than you were used to having in your home, you decided it was only logical for you to go and buy more food into the local store.

You almost reached the gate to go outside of your property as you heard some fast steps behind you, catching up to you.

When you turned around, you saw a man with longer hair and almost expression on his face.

“Uh... hey, you’re going somewhere?” he asked, brushing the back of his neck.

“To the market, why?” you asked, tilting your head sideways at him.

“Well.. don’t laugh, but I wanted to jog a little, but got concerned that I might get lost..” the end of his sentence was almost inaudible already as he lowered his voice, “so.. mind keeping me company?”

That kind of surprised you and as you slowly realised the meaning of the said words that came out of his mouth you bit the inside of your right cheek *hard*, just not to laugh.

What a silly guy. Getting lost in this hole?

But sure, why not keep him company.

“Be sure to catch up with me though,” you teased as you basically broke into the run, opening the gate and hopping straight onto your bike and starting pedalling really hard to get as far away from him, finally bursting out laughing at the significant distance.

“What?!” was the only thing you heard from him and then you felt the breeze from the hot summer air caressing your cheeks as you were passing your neighbours in the well-known road.

“You seem happier than usual today, darling!” some granny said to you from her garden and you just waved in reply with a huge grin plastered on your face.

After spending last years of your youth more or less alone, you couldn’t even phantom the thought of people your age living with you for the eternity of one summer.

You could never complain about a life you had here, it was all you ever wanted, but the connection with the people of the similar age to you was really lacking sometimes.

And the absolute joy that was washing over you right now was the witness.

You slowed your pace after some time, pretty soon being followed by jogging Diego, beads of sweat rolling down his muscular hands.

Your gaze lingered for a second longer than necessary and you quickly tore it away from him, a slight blush creeping on your cheeks as you now looked straight ahead of you at the road.

“I’m not the best runner, but also not the worst, hun,” he said between the breaths as you continued your ride/walk and you just smiled.

“Pretty decent, I’d say,” you finally stopped at the market’s “parking lot” where there were two spaces for cars and at least a dozen of handles for bikes.

You put yours into one of them, not even bothering to lock it. Everyone knows each other here and everyone knows you.

A young person in the village mostly consisted of people in retirement.

“Alright, what do we have here,” said Diego as he followed you into the store that reminded him of something out of the 70s, really old school design and brands that he never heard of before.

“Everything is mostly homemade here,” you answered, making your way towards the fridge with cold drinks, opening it and throwing him a cola can, “except these bad boys.”

“Hell yeah,” he smirked and then looked around, but his gaze kind of kept wandering back at you, while you were too busy picking the right type and amount of groceries.

Why would you live here all by your lonesome?

“So..” you finally heard him say, as you checked out and we’re both putting the groceries into the deep basket on your bike, “you seem pretty chill with us being.. abnormal.”

You briefly looked up at him when your fingers accidentally touched between the cans of soda and glasses of milk and then your hand moved the other way, eyes too.

“Well.. who’s to say what’s normal and what’s not in this world, honestly?” you jumped on your seat when you were done with loading and started your ride back.

“I know,” he agreed, jogging way less intensely now as your pace appeared much slower, “but seven siblings all having some weird shit powers is... kind of crazy, don’t you think?”

That made you nod, “Yes, of course. But still, I’m not too baffled about this. What are the odds that a village person like me would even get into a situation like this?” you asked rhetorically, gaze fixed on the rocky-sandy road ahead, “You should accept life as it is! Confusion and denial are a waste of time,” you concluded and extended your left hand as you were driving past an apple tree and managed to rip two fruits at the same time, offering one to Diego - all while still riding a bike.

“I have my superpowers too,” you laughed a little and winked at him, making him flustered as he tried to hide it by biting into his apple.

.

.

“What do we have here?” Klaus welcomed both of you at the entrance to the summer house, topless and in a skirt.

“We just bought some groceries since we’re capable of eating the whole fridge out in a day,” Diego deadpanned as he - despite your protests - unloaded your bike storage and went into the house to put the bags there, his arms showing extra muscle that’s normally hidden when his body is relaxed.

Your stare lingered for longer than necessary and Klaus *definitely* picked upon that.

“Darling, if you want to get Diego, be a bit more straightforward with him. He’s a dum-dum,” with the last word he knocked on his own head with a finger and rolled his eyes, giggling playfully afterwards and smacking you on the shoulder.

You defensively did the same, blushing and looking anywhere but at Diego nor Klaus.

Hmmmm, such interesting trees you’re having at your own garden all of the sudden.

“But hey, we’ve all decided that before we start training for the inevitable doom of us all, we would take a break for at least a few days and just go to the beach. When we were coming up we noticed the sea behind all the forests, like.. four kilometres from here?” he looked at you with question, “Have you ever been to the beaches there? Could you guide us?”

You gave it thought only for a brief second and then nodded with a confident smile.

“Sure! I haven’t been there in a year or two but the beaches are still the same, I bet,” you answered and put your hands on hips in a cool posture.

“Thank god!” he impulsively hugged you and let go that instant, “otherwise Five said he wouldn’t let you go with us,” he pouted and then sighed, making his way towards their rusty turquoise-ish car.

You followed him, his words piquing your interest.

“Why does he hate me so much? And why is his name Five?” you narrowed your eyes, plopping yourself on the front seat and sat sideways so you could look at Klaus while talking to him.

“Well, darling...” he started, animatedly throwing his arms in the air, “Five was always a strict man, especially after he came from the future, where he spent like billion years and now he’s 50 year old and always shoves this fact into our young baby faces,” he clearly complained and with annoyed expression continued, “and he’s Five because my name is “officially” Four, but Five was the only one of us who disappeared from the house before our dad even bothered to give us names instead of numbers,” he finished but then remembered and continued, “Actually, it was our AI robotic mom Grace who gave us names,” now he was finished, from somewhere materialising a bottle in his hand and taking a sip from it.

“Anyways, beach trip, babeyyyy!”

“Huh..” you just blinked a few times at him as you heard a hoard of different voices going your way.

You wanted to get out of the car to let them sit however they wanted - you were the odd one out after all - but then they all hoarded in there so quickly that you couldn’t even react, being left in the front seat.

Driver’s seat next to you was empty for now.

As you looked back, Klaus was sitting right behind you, next to him Vanya and on the other side Diego, looking out the window.

Behind them was supposed to be a storage area but they apparently turned it into some diy seats as well, Luther and Allison sitting there, not minding the small space.

Soon the blue sort-of-teleport appeared next to you at the driver’s place and Five briefly threw his gaze at you, swiftly starting the car.

The whole inside of the vehicle roared and you were on your way towards the beach, with you as a main gps they had.

Lovely taglist: @radcloudenthusiast @spacenerdpascal @white-wolf-buckaroo @a-girl-who-loves-disney  @undead--ghost​

NEXT PART→

[the--highlanders]

Geyser

The Doctor and Jamie go in search of a geyser, and very nearly miss it.

on ao3.

“What are we waitin’ for, anyway?”

“Ah -” The Doctor paused, his hand hovering over the flask tucked into the top of their picnic basket. “Well, we’re waiting for the geyser to erupt.”

“Aye, I know that.” Flipping the other end of the basket open, Jamie fished out a container of little sandwiches. Polly had said they were fancy, but he would rather have big sandwiches than fancy ones any day, he decided. Still, there were enough of them – and sharing the picnic with the Doctor more than made up for it. “But I don’t know what a geyser is.”

“Oh!” The Doctor blinked at him, like he had never imagined that Jamie would not know what a geyser was. The others never quite seemed to remember that sort of thing, Jamie thought. He should have expected that from the start, he supposed. Right from when he had first stepped into the TARDIS, and the Doctor had tried to settle him in by quoting someone who had not even been born in his time. But it had hardly been the most important thing on his mind, then. And if anyone was going to forget, he would rather it was the Doctor. Ben and Polly tried their best, and were kind enough to explain things to him if he asked, but he could not shake the sense of being an outsider to them. That there was something between them which he could never break into, born at least in part of their shared knowledge. All those things that made them giggle and whisper to each other about people and places and things he did not know.

There was more to it than, that, though, he knew that perfectly well. And perhaps they thought the same thing about him and the Doctor, now. That was an odd thought, and one he had never imagined he would have beyond the realm of wishful thinking. Not that he and the Doctor shared any sort of background like Ben and Polly did, of course – but maybe that was part of it. The fact that Ben and Polly would laugh, and he and the Doctor would turn to each other and shrug. There was certainly some sort of understanding between them, in the way he could look at the Doctor and know what he was thinking, and in the way the Doctor seemed to be able to do the same for him. Or there used to be, at least. Now, with everything so new and fragile, like a butterfly taking its first stumbling steps out of its cocoon, he was no longer so confident.

The Doctor’s fingers closed over his own, and he jolted upright. His heart shot up into his throat with the momentum of the movement.

“It’s a -” Gesturing with one hand, the Doctor squeezed Jamie’s fingers more tightly with the other. “Well, it’s a sort of a spring, really. Water, flowing underground. And if it goes deep enough, or, ah – comes into contact with the magma in the planet’s crust, as it does here – the water boils, and shoots out through a crack in the ground.”

“An’ that’s the geyser?”

“And that’s the geyser, yes.”

“Oh, aye.” Jamie scrunched up his face, mulling it over. “So it’s like a big kettle.”

“Ye-es.” The Doctor paused. “Like a big kettle that shoots water out of its spout when it’s boiled, as well as steam.”

“Aye.” Jamie bit his lip to hide his smile, but the laughter bubbling up in his chest could not be quietened. “No’ a very good kettle, then, is it?”

The Doctor had been watching him curiously, but he laughed at that, throwing back his head like he had never heard anything so funny. “No. No, I suppose it wouldn’t be.” He swiped his free hand over his eyes. “But, ah – it does make for rather a good clock. In a few thousand years, people will be setting their watches by this geyser.”

Almost instinctively, Jamie glanced down at his own watch. “When’s it gonnae go off, again?”

“In about -” The Doctor shrugged. “Oh, I suppose in about five minutes.”

Privately, Jamie had his doubts that the thing would go off at all. It would be just like the Doctor, to finally land them somewhere pleasant – somewhere impressive, no less – plan a whole picnic around the thing – and then find that he had landed a few thousand years too early, or something of that sort. But it was a nice enough spot for a picnic, regardless of whether a pile of rocks ended up shooting water into the air. They had spread their picnic blanket on a hill not too far from the little rocky outcrop that the Doctor had said was the geyser. The spot was just at the edge of the forest, leaving them a good view of the geyser in the middle of the clearing but still nestling them in the shade. It was an oakwood that surrounded them, Jamie might have said, if he had been on Earth. He knew perfectly well that they could not be oak trees, but their thick, twisted trunks and the shape of their sunkissed leaves were close enough. Far in the distance, the land sloped upwards, and the wide leaves of the not-oak trees gave way to something needlier, scruffier, and finally to bare snow and rock at the peak of a jagged mountain range. The closest mountain was lopsided, like something had smashed into its side and broken off a chunk.

Or perhaps, Jamie thought, something coming out of the mountain had done the damage. They had landed in an old volcano ring, the Doctor had said. Mountains spewing fire and smoke. That fire under the planet’s surface was what boiled the water to create the geyser, he supposed. And the volcanoes made the smell, too, that awful, stifling smell that lay heavily over the valley, sickening Jamie to his stomach. For a while, he had wondered whether bringing a picnic had been the right idea after all, and had been grateful to find that the clearing around the geyser was almost free of it. He had smelled something like it once before, when a stubborn hen had covered her egg just a little too well, and the insides had rotted away before anyone had found it. The smell came from sulphur, on both occasions, the Doctor had told him. And he had shown him the sulphur deposits here, too, tiny seams of a yellow so bright he almost could not believe it was natural. It had been as if some giant had come along and scribbled over the stones with a highlighter, like the Doctor did with his scientific papers.

“It’s supposed to be one of the most impressive geysers in this galactic sector,” the Doctor said softly. He was gazing out towards the crack in the rocks, as rapt as if the thing was erupting already. “Aside from cryogeysers, that is, but they’re not quite the same thing...”

He was still staring wide-eyed out towards the geyser, and Jamie snorted, nudging his side gently. “Wish you’d look at me like that,” he said, grinning.

“Hm?” The Doctor twisted around, blinking at him. “How do you mean?”

“Like -” Resting his chin on his fist, Jamie put on the most puppy-eyed, adoring expression he could muster. “That.”

Indignation spread across the Doctor’s face. “I don’t look like that.”

Jamie snorted. “Aye, ye do.”

“And if I did -” The Doctor was grinning himself now, leaning in until his nose was close enough that it bumped against Jamie’s. Twisting around, Jamie propped himself up on his hands and leant forward a little more. They swayed back and forth ever so slightly, caught up in the mutual excitement of their own foolishness. “I would most certainly look at you like that.”

Lifting one hand, Jamie brushed his fingers against the underside of the Doctor’s chin, just at the soft patch of skin where it met his neck. “Would ye?” Goodness, if the Doctor didn’t just make him silly. Absolutely, completely, giddily out of his mind. He ought to have been embarrassed by how silly he was. It had only been a few short weeks since he had kissed the Doctor, or the Doctor had kissed him, one or the other. It did not really matter in the end, he supposed. They had both been so terribly awkward, then, fumbling out their breathless confessions. And now here he was – flirting, he had no other word for it than that, flirting with the Doctor – like everything was not still terribly delicate.

But in that moment it did not feel delicate, not with the Doctor’s smile widening, and him saying “I would,” and leaning in just that little bit further to kiss Jamie. It was a good few moments before Jamie could even think to kiss back, and he regretted moving his hand away from the ground, because his other arm was trembling under the weight of his shock. But he did not regret it for long, because he quickly shifted his free hand up to cup the Doctor’s cheek properly, fingers winding their way into the hair behind his ear. He soon brought up his other hand to mirror it, weighing all his stability on the Doctor. They swayed – tilted over – then collapsed onto the picnic blanket in a tangle.

Jamie landed squarely on the Doctor’s chest with an oof, and sat up hurriedly, glancing down to see whether he had squashed the Doctor too badly. He did not seem to be particularly hurt, judging by the way he was smiling, and Jamie shuffled down to kiss him again, smiling back against his lips. They were clumsier now, mumbling little huffs of laughter between kisses, and Jamie almost liked it better this way, with all the freedom of knowing how terribly silly they were.

Something thundered into life behind them, and they sat bolt upright in unison, knocking against each other. The geyser had gone off, Jamie realised a moment later, and a great pillar of foam and vapour had been sent flying impossibly high into the air, so high that he had to crane his neck to see the top of it. It hovered there for a moment, like a feather caught between too breezes, then splashed back down onto the rocks below. The water gathered in well-worn channels, following the paths it must have been running down for thousands of years to drain away into the grass around it. Even after the whole thing had finished, the Doctor was left staring at the geyser hole, frozen in wonder.

“There ye go again,” Jamie said. “Lookin’ like that.”

Colour flooded into the Doctor’s cheeks. “I don’t look like anything.”

Jamie laughed at that – and laughed harder when the Doctor turned to look at him, because there was a touch of that same softness around his eyes, the way his lips slightly parted. Maybe the Doctor did look at him like that after all, he thought. Maybe, against all the odds, he could compete with the wonders of the universe.

“Aye, ye do,” he said, and he leant in to kiss the Doctor again.

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

Must Have Been The Wind | [Fem!Reader x Ben Solo] | Star Wars

Notes: This piece was inspired by Alec Benjamin’s song with the same name. I recommend you listen to it while reading, it’s beautiful :) Also, this is kind of an AU where Ben did turn to the dark side but Luke was able to persuade him to come back, so he never met Rey. In the end he decided to give up his life with the force and moved to Coruscant.

Fandom: Star Wars

Warnings: Abuse, Slight Gore, Violence, Swearing, Angst, Fluff

Summary: Ben Solo decides to complain about the noise upstairs but instead falls in love. But Y/N has a boyfriend and dark secrets.

Word Count: 10′105

© Fanficsforheartandsoul 

--------

Voices woke him up. He sighed. The neighbors upstairs were going crazy. Again. 

He contemplated if he should retaliate since this was now the sixth time they screamed him awake, but he decided not to. At least not at... His eyes traveled to his nightstand. Not at 3 am in the morning. And they seemed to have calmed down. 

He turned on his left side with a relieved sigh, but then they returned to yell at each other. It was incoherent because the walls muted the noises at least a little, although not enough for him not to know when they had a fight.

He would go up tomorrow. He would complain. Tell them to keep it the fuck down. And then they would shut up. Because if they didn't, he could still use the force to threaten them. Although he had decided to never use it again, this was an emergency. His sleep was at stakes. And without sleep, he could turn into a real monster. He would definitely intimidate them for his precious 8 hours.

But when he took the elevator to the 13th floor and knocked on the apartment the next morning, he didn't expect the person who opened the door.

"How can I help you?"

In front of him stood the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. She had dazzling e/c eyes with h/c hair, and he felt as if the whole planet paused just to give him more time to savor her beauty. A thousand thoughts rushed through his mind. She tilted her head in confusion, and when she waved her hand in front of his face, he blinked and said breathlessly: 

"H-Hi."

The corner of her lips twitched, and his heart fluttered. There was an awkward silence where he just gazed at her openly while she returned the eye contact. When she lifted an eyebrow - a perfectly shaped eyebrow - he coughed and stammered:

"I uh... I'm living in the apartment below yours and... I wanted to t-to..." 

She saved him from his weak attempt to speak, but he didn't like how she had flinched. She hid it well; nonetheless, he had seen it.

"I'm so so sorry! I know it's been loud at night in the past few days. My boyfriend came over." 

Two years ago, he would have never guessed that his heart would be crushed by one word. Boyfriend. Makes sense. She looked like a goddess and her voice... 

"Well, it happens, I guess." 

Sith, what a great response. NOT. 

"I'm Ben, by the way. Ben Solo."

She smiled and stretched out her hand. He clenched his fist into his side, hoping that any sweat that might have appeared would magically go away, then he shook her hand while she introduced herself.

"My name's Y/N L/N, nice to meet you, Mr. Solo." 

He cringed when she said his last name. She obviously didn't mean it, but Mr. Solo just sounded mocking. How would she even know that he was single? Also, in regard to any friends? They have never met before.

"Please call me Ben, I'm not that old."

The comment caused her smile to widen, and his heart beamed when he saw how her eyes turned into crescents. He almost didn't want to let go of her hand, which was really soft, by the way, but he didn't want her to think he was a creep, so he almost ripped it out of her grasp. 

"Well, Ben," Holy Sith, how she pronounced his name, "let me apologize for the noise with some Jogan fruit cake I just made. Are you free right now?"

He nodded profusely. 

"Yeah, of course, totally. T-That sounds great, I love Jogan fruit."

His awkward way of speaking got a giggle out of her, and when she opened the door wider for him to step into the apartment, he felt like he was the luckiest man alive. When he passed her, he could smell a fragment of her shampoo or perfume, which only quickened his heartbeat. He would probably die of a cardiac arrest. 

"Just walk down the hallway, the kitchen is on the right around the corner." 

He hesitantly followed her instructions while he sensed her presence behind him. It seemed like his sweat pores had decided that it was time for a celebration flush today, and when he reached the kitchen, it felt like he had crawled around on Mustafar. 

Y/N showed him the table where he could sit down while she prepared some cake slices, and he took the seat facing the kitchen counter where he was able to see her. 

He didn't quite know what he was doing here. He had planned to lecture his neighbors, but now that she invited him in and showed that she was a kind and beautiful human being, he had no idea how to approach the whole noise thing again. She did apologize, but he still wanted something more. 

A relationship sputtered his virgin brain, and he had to reprimand himself that he was indecent. He needed a confirmation that they would keep it down starting from today. 

"You only recently moved in, right? I'm sorry I was too busy to come and welcome you."

She set a plate of Jogan fruit cake and a fork in front of him and then sat down, so they faced each other. He dismissed her apology with a wave. 

"It's fine, I didn't expect anyone, and there are so many apartments in this complex so it would be a hassle to say hello to everyone."

She only hummed, but it seemed to him as if she wanted to disagree. But when Y/N didn't say anything, he didn't comment on it either. She started to eat, and he followed. 

"Wow, you're really good at making cakes," he almost let a satisfied moan slip past his lips but was able to catch himself in time. 

"Thank you! I have quite a lot of time to practice my cooking skills, so..."

He smiled at her, and they began to talk about their lives on Coruscant. Ben didn't realize at first, but then he noticed that the young woman seemed to avoid any topic involving her boyfriend. So when he brought the noise up again, she only apologized once more and promised to be quieter from now on. He didn't pry even though he really, really wanted to know what the yelling was all about. 

Two hours went by, and when Y/N glanced at the clock, her expression changed, and she explained to him that she needed to start to work again. He nodded and let himself be escorted back to the door. 

"It was nice meeting you, Y/N. Let's talk someday again."

She returned the smile and pointed to the floor.

"Yeah, I feel the same, and since I live right above you, we can do that any time."

The young woman laughed, and his heart got hit by an arrow again. What was she doing to him, holy Sith?

"I will knock, alright?"

She demonstrated her knocking skills on the wall, and he grinned. It felt like they had become good friends in the few hours they had spent together.

"Let's make that our signal."

He repeated the rhythm she meant, and they just knocked on the door for a few seconds. Ben was the first one to stop their band rehearsal.

"Thank you for the delicious cake."

Her eyes lit up, and he could see the happiness in them. The compliment meant a lot to her.

"Next time you come by, I'll have some of your favorite foods prepared," she joked, and his mind couldn't stop a dirty comment.

"That would be awesome."

With a wave, he walked to the elevator, and Y/N closed the door. While he waited, he couldn't get the comment out of his mind. I would prefer to eat you.

Were his pick up lines really that bad? Cringe.

-

They began talking over their holocoms, and it was so much fun. For Ben, who had lived with strict rules and never proper puberty, it was a welcome change to chat about trivial things like the coffee from one of the cafés in CoCo Town, or what kind of holo transmissions they regularly watched. 

Y/N recommended shows and music for him, and while he listened to her favorite artists, he thought of her beautiful smile and kind eyes. 

He began to understand why she liked the husky voice of the lead singer. And while the band of Twi'lek men continued singing about unknown planets and adventurous journeys to find the love of their lives, he imagined himself as a powerful and elegant Jedi who could save the young woman upstairs from her worries. 

It was childish, but he couldn't stop himself. The songs just stimulated his imagination. And since he had a lot of free time besides his part-time job at the beginning of the week, he let his mind wander. 

But she wasn't the only visitor. He thought about his mother and how her force signature cried out in happiness when Luke had brought him back home. He was often reminded of her tears and how her weakening arms had embraced him with surprising strength. Ben's love for her and his father never stopped, but it had been concealed by all the pain and betrayal he had felt.

He wasn't ready yet to tell this to his uncle, but he was so glad that he had taken Luke's hand and returned. Their relationship was still rocky, but after he had listened to the stories of his mother about her brother, he was able to understand why the Jedi reacted the way he had back then.

But the relationship he had with Luke was better at the moment than the one with his father. Han Solo was surprisingly cold when his only son returned to the light side of the force. It hurt Ben, badly to tell the truth, but he didn't have to courage to say it to him. The smuggler had turned gruff and bitter through the years when he believed that he had lost his son forever. 

It was probably precisely the fact that Ben was his son that both of them couldn't approach one another because they didn't know how to start. Talking about their feelings was never a strength of the men in the Solo family. 

He wanted to share these things about his family with Y/N, but he felt like he would overwhelm her and potentially scare her away if she found out that he was the guy who had tormented the galaxy with the first order. Of course, it was in the past, and he had repented for it, plenty actually, but there was a reason why the noise from the apartment upstairs hadn't been the only thing that kept him awake at night. 

So he kept these things to himself, saying he could talk with his therapist about it while their friendship continued to grow. 

Y/N knocked on the floor every evening before she went asleep. It became a ritual, and he would knock back with the help of the robot arm that he still hadn't re-attached to his service droid. 

From time to time, Ben would ask himself if Y/N's boyfriend minded their interactions. He never met the man, but he knew he would always come over for four days in a row. He knew because these days, the woman upstairs would knock softer. 

The man seemed to naturally be a loud person. Ben could often hear his laughs and shouts through the thin walls when he watched a holo transmission. He not only appeared to be noisy but also short-tempered. 

There were times where he had to listen to their arguments. He never knew what they had been about, but it bothered him greatly. The noise less than the fact that this man screamed at the woman he was supposed to love. 

If I was him, I would never yell at her. 

When his brain first spewed out that thought, he was shocked. What was he thinking? Firstly, he had no right to judge that guy since he didn't know him at all, and secondly, why did that even cross his mind? 

He didn't want to admit it to himself, but maybe he should. Nothing good would come out of it if he didn't.

.

That's why he called his mother 4 months after his first meeting with Y/N. He told himself he was only calling because Ben wanted to thank her for the care package with sweets she sent him, but he couldn't deny that he also wanted to talk about, well, feelings. Unique feelings, to be exact. Love. 

Sith, he couldn't believe he wanted to share his thoughts about Y/N with his mother, but he would rather cut off his own arm than contact his father. They were still ignoring each other, so Han Solo was a no-go. And his uncle Luke also wasn't an option. So he would embarrass himself a little and let his mother swoon about his emotions like that one time where he had confessed that he planned to marry the neighbor's girl when he was 5. 

"Ben, Sweetie? How lovely that you contact me first! How is my son?"

She began to call him that again when he had broken down in her arms a few days after Luke had brought him back to his mother's house. At first, it bothered him a little. He had been a merciless killer, and sweetie wasn't a title a person like him deserved, but he never told her off. To be true, it made his chest warm up, and it reminded him of his childhood.

Leia Organa Solo never lost her loving attitude towards her son, and she didn't even hold herself back when she was in diplomatic meetings, and he suddenly called. She may be a politician, but she wasn't cold towards her family. Thankfully she was at home when he called this time.

She seemed to sit in the living room on one of the sofas with a cup of tea in her hands and her hair was tied in a loose knot. Her posture was relaxed, and Ben could feel her calmness in the force.

"I'm fine, Mom. What about you?" 

Her eyes didn't lose their kind look through the hologram, and she leaned forward, putting the cup on the small table out of view. He noticed a blanket in her lap, and he immediately recognized the ugly carpet, how he called it, that his father bought his mother when he was younger. The green color looked like puke according to his younger self, and he still agreed. 

"I'm enjoying the quietness in the house. Han is buying groceries with Chewie. I don't want to tell you too much, but your father doesn't have the best digestion anymore." 

He furrowed his brows, and when he saw her mischievous expression, he made a face. He didn't want to know that. His display of disgust caused his mother to chuckle. But soon after, she watched him carefully.

"Are you doing alright with your part-time job? You know if you ever need money we-" 

He interrupted her softly but with serious eyes: "It's okay. I make enough to pay my bills." 

He didn't have the heart to tell her that he disliked his unfriendly boss and how he was ordered around like a slave when a new customer arrived with their battered spaceship. But it was true that he received enough money. The work environment may be shitty, but the job in Kai's Repair shop paid him enough. It was alright. He had already complained about it with Y/N. 

"So did you receive my package? It shouldn't take this long, but maybe one of the transports had troubles. It's still not safe on some trade routes." 

Ben shook his head and glanced at his side, where the box with the sweets laid. Most of the candy was already eaten. Since he was living alone, no one could stop his sweet tooth. 

"No, I got it. I wanted to say thanks. They were delicious."

"You already ate all of them?" 

Her raised eyebrow and teasing tone made his ears turn slightly red. If she had seen how he watched one of Y/N's recommended space series two hours ago with a bowl full of candy in his lap and how he absently filled his mouth with a piece every minute, she would have probably scolded him.

"Mom, I'm already 32 years old. I'm not a child anymore, and I can eat what and how much I want."

The defensive answer only proved more that he couldn't control his sweet tooth at all, like so many times in his childhood. His father didn't use to call him a cookie thief for nothing.

"I know, I know. But my adult son still needs his Mom to instruct him on how to wash clothes, or am I wrong?" 

Ben could only roll his eyes. That was one time! Or two... Well, it didn't matter. While he tried to ignore the rising heat in his cheeks, he fiddled with his fingers and tried to get the courage to tell her.

She noticed he wanted to tell her something, and her voice was soft and calm when she asked: "Do you want to ask me something, Sweetie?"

He took a deep breath and then raised his head to look her straight in the eye. 

"I-I think I've fallen in love."

Her eyes widened slightly, and she opened her mouth, surprised. Saying it out loud made him cringe. I feel like I'm going to regret this.

"Ben, that- that is wonderful! Who are they? How did you meet?"

His mother's curiosity and sparkling eyes embarrassed him, but he told her the truth:

"She lives in the apartment above mine. Her name is Y/N, and we uh, met when I wanted to complain about the noise."

Leia furrowed her brows then raised them as if she remembered something. She leaned forward and asked: 

"You mean she's the neighbor who keeps you up at night? The one you complained about last time?"

The way she said keep you up at night made him clench his teeth, and his ears turned even redder. He nodded. He may have talked some shit about Y/N before they met, but that was because they had been very loud.

But not anymore. After he talked with Y/N about it, there hadn't been any problems. Or at least they shifted their arguments to daytime. 

"Really? The one you said and I quote "They are as useless as bantha shit, and the force would do us all a favor if it killed the-"

"Yes, Mom! It's her. And I regret that I talked about her like that no need to say anything else!"

He knew she was just teasing him, but he could feel that he was already red as a tomato from embarrassment, so it was time to stop.

"B-But I..." he tried to find the right words, "I- she... she already has a boyfriend."

He let his head hang low, and his black locks covered his face. His mother wasn't able to see his dark expression, but she could read his body language, and she immediately stopped giggling. Her eyes turned soft, and she sighed.

"Oh, Ben...I'm so sorry."

Why did she apologize? It wasn't her fault. It was no one's fault. Y/N was already taken, and he couldn't do anything about it. He didn't have the right to do anything. All these years, he was never properly confronted by love, but he knew enough about it from things he saw and got told. 

"It... It hurts", he spoke without thinking but was the truth, "my chest. Why does it hurt? I don't know her for that long and- and I never... Why does it hurt like that, Mom?"

Leia watched her 32 years old son turn back into the little boy who was shy and quickly cried, the boy she had hugged so much in his childhood, the boy who had treated the world around him with gentle and soft care, the boy who had gifted her a four-leaf-clover and told her to stop crying after she had had a frustrating talk with some idiotic politicians. She could see the lonely boy in his hunched posture, and she regretted her decision to send him off with Luke to become a Jedi. 

"Love is, how should I say it... it influences our minds and our bodies. It can be amazing but also painful, sometimes both at the same time. The pain you're feeling right now will fade. We cannot choose who we fall in love with. The heart decides, and sometimes it decides wrong. That is not your fault." 

He knew that she didn't really answer his question, but Ben realized that she tried to comfort him. The calmness she radiated through the force engulfed him, and it was as if his Mom really was in his apartment and gave him a hug. He believed he could smell her perfume faintly. His tense shoulders relaxed slightly.

"I feel stupid. I mean, she told me she had a boyfriend when we first met, but I still wanted to continue talking to her. Okay, that might also be because I know literally no one else in the apartment block, but still..."

He ignored that he basically just told his mother that he had no friends, not even acquaintances. Too bad, it was the truth. 

"Well, what do you like about her?"

She crossed her legs and folded her hands to listen to what he wanted to say. He thought about it for a bit. Obviously, the first thing he noticed about Y/N was her stunning appearance. She was attractive, and her stare made his heart flutter. But when they got to know each other better, he found out that she was also kind. Kind and good at making desserts. 

The Jogan fruit cake wasn't the only thing he received from her. Over the last 4 months, she had put some boxes with dessert and sweets in front of his door. Or left a bag with homemade cookies, and all of them had been delicious. A customer once told him that love goes through the stomach. If that was true, Y/N reeled him right in with her skills. 

Then there was the way she talked. She was carefree and outright, but he liked it. She said what she was thinking without taking shit from anyone, and that intrigued him. Also, she had an excellent taste for music and holo transmissions. He had watched one of her recommended series in 2 days and then watched it again and again. 

She was fun and talking with her about the shows or his work, or her friends was enjoyable. Surprisingly, he loved it when she told him stories about her work life and what gossip was going around. 

But Y/N was also understanding and knowledgeable. When he complained about that one guy who couldn't understand that his ship needed a hyperdrive to travel at light speed, she widened his perspective and showed him that not everyone in the galaxy had left their planet before. 

And something crucial, especially for him; the silence between them wasn't weird. Sometimes they would just call and let the holo com on while they continued doing their own things or chores. Once Ben was so tired, he just took a nap while he could hear Y/N humming in the background cooking something. 

Or another time, when her boyfriend didn't come over, they went on the balcony and watched the stars, and she dropped a can of soda with the help of a rope. It was an awesome night, and his heart couldn't stop beating fast that evening. 

It was true that his chest was hurting whenever he thought about Y/N and her boyfriend or when she talked about him, but there were so many moments where he was overjoyed. If he had to feel the pain to receive good memories with her, it was worth it. He could endure it. The pain was nothing to him.

But unfortunately, it wasn't the same for Y/N.

-

"You stupid bitch!"

His palm grazed her cheek again, and the speed of his slap flung her head back. Pain spread across her face, and she clenched her teeth.

"I'm so sorry, B-Babe. I'll fi-fix it immediately."

She wanted to kneel and collect the shards of glass when another sharp pain struck her body. 

Y/N couldn't stop a small cry escaping her lips as Cain stepped on her hand, pressing her palm right into the sharp broken glass. His weight caused the shards to tear her skin, and she could feel how they drew blood. The pain caused tears to prick in her eyes, and she whimpered.

"Fix it? You already fucking broke it! Clean it up and get out of my sight."

He shifted his weight to make himself even heavier, and she sobbed, her other hand grasping his ankle:

"Stop. you're hurting me, please, stop!"

Usually, she wouldn't plead like that, but in the last few days, their arguments turned worse and worse, and Cain's temper was always boiling. She didn't dare to talk back or curse at him because she worried that he would break up with her. And she couldn't let that happen. Too much was at stakes. 

He finally stepped back and turned away to leave. While he went to the living room, he muttered: "Fucking useless piece of shit."

She stayed in the kitchen, kneeling on the floor with her hand a bloody mess. Tears rushed over her cheeks, and she cried silently. It's alright. It's just a phase. It will get better, his job is just annoying him, it will be fine.

That evening she didn't knock on the floor. She didn't want to risk it. Cain didn't know anything about Ben yet, and he definitely wasn't in the mood. Besides, he quickly got jealous; that's why she refrained from telling him about her friendship with her neighbor at the moment.

Instead, she laid on her side of the bed and listened to the steady breathing of the man next to her. She could sense his body heat, but it was as if he wasn't there. She felt cold and lonely. 

What went wrong? 

Their relationship started out great. She had felt like he was her soulmate, the man she wanted to spend her life with. His laugh had filled her chest with warmth, and his kisses made her heart flutter. He took her to the most beautiful places, murmured lovely compliments into her ears, and supported her dream of working inside a bakery. It was perfect.

He was polite and proper, the way he treated her sister was so kind. He disregarded her disability, and Y/N felt like she found an angel. Family was the most important thing for her, and Cain wanted to pay for her sister's surgery. 

His kindness was incredible. Unbelievable, yes.

As it turned out, there was another side of him. A scary one. 

She turned around to face her boyfriend. He looked so peaceful, so different from the angry man he was in the last few weeks. It was the fault of his friends, she knew. He was friends with some shady people, and Y/N had realized there was spice involved, but she ignored it. Closed her eyes. After all, the money he got would help her sister. 

If somebody heard her thoughts, they would probably think that she only stayed with him because of the money, but that wasn't true. She hoped, no, knew that under all that anger and bitterness rested the man she fell in love with.

She lifted her hand and traced the lines of his face. His breath tickled her skin, and she smiled weakly. Tomorrow will bring change. With that thought, she pressed a kiss on his hair and then cuddled closer to him. 

She didn't notice the blinking red light coming from her nightstand where she had put her holo com.

.

When she woke up, his side was empty, and the bedsheets were already cold. Y/N rubbed her eyes and frowned. Where did Cain go? He didn't need to work today. It was Saturday. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and checked the time on her alarm. 08:41. 

That was way too early for him. Usually, he wouldn't wake up before 10, so why...? She heard the slam of a door, and it only took her 5 seconds to jump out of bed and run to the front door of her apartment. He was gone. His shoes, his jacket, even the ugly ass sweater that hung on the coat rack which hadn't been touched for ages, was gone. No, no, no, NO!!

Y/N opened the door and rushed down the corridor of the 13th floor. 

"Cain! Babe, wait! Where are you going?!"

She saw him standing in front of the elevator, and the fact that he carried almost everything that he had stored in her apartment let her blood run cold. His head whipped around, and he watched how his girlfriend rushed towards him. 

"Go back in, Y/N." 

His voice was threatening, and she stopped in her tracks 3 meters away from him. She gulped and searched his face for any clue. What happened?

"W-Where are you go- are you leaving me again?" 

The words that left her lips were nothing but a mere whisper, but he heard them anyway because he responded. And his answer left her devastated.

"Yeah. But this time for real."

The ground shook, and her legs crumbled. If she hadn't grabbed the wall at the last moment, she would have crashed to the floor. Her chest was tight, and it was hard to breathe. He just watched her, his expression icy. It was totally uncharacteristic for him.

"W...Why? Why are you saying this?! What did I do?! Was it because of yesterday? Or the day before? I apo- I already asked for your forgiveness! You said it's fine! Why-" a sob interrupted her, and she gasped, "why are you always leaving without telling me anything?!"

Her voice got shrill towards the end, and she realized in the back of her mind that her neighbors would probably complain, maybe Ben too, but she didn't care. Not after he wanted to pull the same move again. "I can't do it anymore, I'm fucking leaving!" It wasn't the first time where he just threw in the towel of their relationship and left. 

"This- This is not how people solve fights, Babe. We can talk about it, alright? Let's talk it out. Please. Please!"

The elevator door opened with a ding, and Cain gave her a look. He stepped inside without saying a word. When her boyfriend turned to face her, his eyes were the ones of a stranger.

"Don't contact me."

It was as if the door closed in slow motion. Y/N wanted to rush inside, but her feet didn't move. Her body was frozen. She could only watch through her tears as the elevator closed and vanished. Just like her relationship. 

"Fu- Fuck."

Her crying echoed through the corridor of the 13th floor.

-

Ben had just left his apartment for groceries when he received a message on his comlink. He opened it and let it play while he locked his home, and it confused him a little that there was only silence. At first. Suddenly a voice spoke, and he paused in his tracks.

"Ben, Son... Hey."

He almost dropped his bag. Thankfully there was nothing in it yet. 

"My- my..." 

Stars, was that his Dad?! He continued listening attentively, and he could hear some background noise on the recording. He would recognize the humming anywhere. His father was in the Millennium Falcon. 

"It's late here... Listen, I don't really know what I wanted to say- I forgot. Planned this whole thing, but uh... It's gone now. Your father is an old bastard."

Ben slowly walked to the elevator, still listening to every sound coming from his comlink. He absently minded pressed the call button and waited. Han Solo sighed into the recording, and the familiarity from it almost made Ben laugh. 

"Uh, so... I'd like to... to see you again. Maybe you want to join me- and Chewie of course - on a.. a trade deal? We could talk... I would like to know, uhh, how you're doing, and everything."

The message was not a holo, so he couldn't see his father, but Ben just knew that he was squirming in his seat when he had said that. He could practically see it. The awkwardness that the recording transmitted... It made him cringe. But in a good way. If that made sense. 

It just showed that his Dad was just as awkward and shy about their relationship as him. A warm feeling bloomed inside his chest, and he recognized it as hope. Maybe the father-son bond from his childhood could be restored.

His father continued to speak right when the elevator appeared, and he stepped inside. He immediately felt the weird atmosphere inside. A man with curly brown hair and an angry expression on his face stood in the corner. He had a big bag slung over his shoulder, and the force was screaming around him in anger. 

"...and uh... I love you, Ben."

His eyes and the stranger's met. The man raised an eyebrow, and he just gave him a nod. He wanted to press the button for the first floor, but it was already lit. So he turned around and faced the door. 

The recording stopped, and he pressed the button to mute his comlink.

"Was that your boyfriend?"

The fact that the clearly pissed off man wanted to start a fight with him shocked him more than the insinuation and the mocking tone. What's that guy's problem? I just walked in. He rolled his eyes.

He contemplated if he should just ignore the man, but the spikes of anger in the force told him not to. The fact that he remained calm, while the man clearly antagonized him, showed how therapy was helping him. 

"That was my Dad."

The familiar term rolled over his tongue with ease, and it made him smile. He didn't realize until now that his father just ended his message with a demonstration of his feelings. He still loves me. It finally sank in, and boy, did it feel good. He had to lower his head because his eyes got a little wet. 

"Love. What a joke", mumbled the other guy under his breath, and that's when Ben noticed the smell. 

It was faint, but for his sensitive senses strengthened through the force, he could clearly identify it. The warmth in his body disappeared almost immediately.

He turned around and wanted to speak when the elevator bell indicated their arrival on the first floor, and the door opened. The brown-haired man just walked past him and ignored his open mouth. Ben shifted his head and watched how Y/N's boyfriend left the building, his fists were clenched to his side.

"So, that's him." 

The boyfriend. The lover. The screamer. The bedmate. The asshole. The soulmate.

Sith, how his blood boiled. His jaws clenched.

Almost instinctively, he reached out with the force and felt Y/N's presence in the building. The weight of her sadness and shock almost crushed him.

What the hell happened?

After the first meeting with the boyfriend and the realization that Y/N and that guy had a fight again, it was pretty hard for Ben to continue his journey to get groceries.

But he couldn't go to the 13th floor and comfort the person he liked. It would be weird for her. Maybe she would think that he was a stalker. How else would he know about her sadness and the argument? So he gritted his teeth and also exited the apartment block.

Shit, it would've been better for him if he never met the guy. 

He contemplated whether he should contact Y/N later or if he should wait a few days for her to calm down. When it came to the whole relationship topic, he felt like there was a wall between them. She rarely talked about her boyfriend, and he realized that he didn't even know his name.

Maybe he wasn't even that close to the young woman in the apartment above his. His thoughts were grim, and the joy about his father's invitation to hang out and talk got pushed back. His strides were big, and the scowl on his face made the people on the street give way for him. Ben was so buried in his thoughts, that he didn't even realize how he parted the pedestrians like a blade.

-

A week passed, and he almost turned crazy. The fact that Y/N didn't even mention the fight and just went on with a fake smile painted on her lips not only hurt him but also made him angry. 

They had shared many secrets, and Ben really thought that their friendship was deep. But apparently, it wasn't deep enough for situations like this. Or she didn't want to talk about her boyfriend with him, because she fucking knew that he was in love with her he was a man. 

That seemed like a plausible reason; therefore, he tried to ignore the fake happiness and waited desperately for her to spill her thoughts. But she never did, and her sadness only grew.

Their conversations turned superficial, and he had problems to hide his concern. The dread in the force pained him, and it physically challenged him not to storm up the stairs and knock her apartment door down. 

Why aren't you telling me anything? 

The thought spiraled in his mind every evening. He held the robot arm of his cleaner droid in his hands and stared at the ceiling. There were already marks from where he hit the roof with the metal fingers. 

10 days after the fight between her boyfriend and her, Y/N stopped replying to his knocks. 

Ben didn't give up though. He knocked every day. With the force, he was able to sense her in the room above, but she never responded. 

Sadly, he got a lot busier with his work, and the upcoming meeting with his father distracted him enough to forget to knock one day. And when he did. It was a grave mistake.

.

He was on his way back to his apartment after an awesome day with his Dad and Chewie. He whistled in happiness and reminisced about the day he spent in the Millenium Falcon. They went on a trip to Corellia to get supplies and parts for the Falcon. It was a relaxing and calm journey, but Ben couldn't be any happier.

 He was in his favorite place with his father, who still loved him and his best friend since childhood. It was like paradise. At least until he walked through the front door of his apartment complex.

The dread had turned into something Ben could only describe as depression. And it hit him hard. He knew this emotion, and he couldn't believe Y/N was feeling it now. 

So he obviously didn't hesitate to press the elevator button to the 13th floor. When he arrived, the air was heavy. He knew that the young woman wasn't force-sensitive or anything, but the intense emotions of any living being could influence the force. That's why he was so shocked. The disturbance was greater than he would've expected. It made it hard for him to breathe. 

Ben had already knocked on her apartment door, even though he didn't even know what to tell her. He was literally covered in sweat and some oil stains after he had helped his Dad to do some repairs on the Falcon. 

He checked his appearance in the metallic apartment plaque and frantically tried to get rid of the black stain on his cheek. 

Please don't open the door yet, please!

His rubbing only caused the stain to smudge, and now he just looked dirtier.

Great, just great. 

A sigh escaped his lips, and he let his head hang low. What should he even tell her? "I know you had a fight with your boyfriend because I can sense what you feel, and it's breaking my heart." Ha, as if.

He took a deep breath and then lifted his head. 

Only now did he realize that quite some time passed since he had knocked. And still no sign of Y/N. But she was clearly at home. The cocktail of sorrow, regret, and heartbreak was proof enough. 

He knocked again. This time louder and it was accompanied by a few words: "Y/N? Hey, it's me, Ben... Do you... uhh, do you have some time to talk?"

Silence.

Then the light sound of footsteps coming closer.

The clatter of a key and then the click of the door opening. 

Ben straightened his back and watched how Y/N slowly opened the door.

The first thing that immediately caught his eye was the absence of the cheeky glim in her eyes. He only stared at her, and she did the same.

The dark circles under her eyes and the exhausted expression made his heart clench. He could feel how his own face turned into a frown.

"Hey..." she mumbled, not even trying to hide her unhappiness anymore.

"We need to talk. About this." 

He gestured at her, and the corners of her mouth slightly lifted. She opened the door wider, and like the first time they had met, he walked past her, but this time the only thing that he could sense was her mental exhaustion. 

This was only the second time he entered her apartment. But thanks to their holo conversations, he knew how Y/N's flat looked like. She followed him into the living room and pointed to the sofa, an invitation for him to sit down. He did, but he was stiff. 

She leaned on the wall, crossing her arms in front of her chest as if she wanted to create a barrier between them. Ben took a deep breath.

"Listen, I... I know something happened, and I can't bear to see your fake smiles anymore. You know... To see you like this... it hurts me."

His voice was hesitant, and he fiddled with his fingers, something he always did when he was nervous.

The young woman stared at him with wide eyes, then she seemingly slumped.

"So you knew..."

He scoffed.

"How could I not. You're not exactly good at hiding your sadness... kinda like A'tak."

The mention of their favorite character from Smuggle Kings brought a real smile to her lips, and he relaxed slightly. It was a relief that he could still make her smile, even when it was just faint. 

Y/N sighed. It was deep and long, and he could feel the weight of her thoughts in it. She slowly walked over to him and sat down on the sofa. There was still a significant distance between them, but it was smaller than before. She sat on one end of the couch, and he on the other. 

Ben faced her, and she pulled her legs closer to her body, embracing them and hiding her face in between her arms. 

"You know... My boyfriend... Cain and I broke up."

What? He exhaled slowly. WHAT?! 

That wasn't what he had expected. Okay, he knew that her boyfriend - no, ex-boyfriend was leaving that day, but he thought it was only temporary.

"Uhhh... Can I ask why?"

She raised her head and gave him a look through her hair that has fallen into her face. He regretted his question immediately. 

"Forget it... You don't have to talk about it, I'm- I'm sorry... that was, uhm... not appropriate."

He was just so surprised. His head that was already filled with the emotions he could sense from her got filled with some more. Anger, worry, and a small flame of... Hope?

She shook her head and leaned her head back. He noticed how her eyes watered up. 

Oh, wow, man, you're an asshole he told himself and mentally screamed. 

"We- We had problems... For a while now and... well, two weeks ago, he took all his stuff and", she lifted her hands in defeat, and her voice was almost inaudible when she continued, "left. He just left without an expla- explanation."

There was so much bitterness in her voice, the force lashed out, and he had to gulp. Sith, he wanted to kill that asshole Cain. 

Anger welled up in his chest, and he clenched his fists. If he ever saw that man again...

His fury distinguished as fast as it came when tears finally spilled, and Y/N's cheeks got wet.

She huffed and groaned, wiping the falling tears away.

"Ahh, I hate crying... I cried so much in the last few days, I'm really tired of it." 

She laughed, but it sounded as fake as it was, and her breath was shaky. She looked into Ben's eyes, and he could see the pain in hers. 

"I'm sorry... For not telling you. It's not that I don't trust you. It's just... I- I  don't like it when people see me all weak and vulnerable."

Y/N stretched out her hand, and he watched her for a second. Her expression was still pained, but there was a hopeful look inside her eyes, so he grabbed her hand and sat closer to her. The moment their palms touched, she pulled him into a hug. He froze at first, but when her body shook from a sob, he put his own arms around her and sighed into her hair.

“It's okay. I understand..."

They stayed in that position for a while. Ben embraced Y/N while she held onto him and cried. 

Fuck, it hurt him so much to hold her, knowing that she was crying and yearning for an asshole and not him. 

But the fact that she let her guard down and cried around him, also kind of made him proud. It was apparent that she considered him to be trustworthy enough to show him her vulnerability. 

"You know... My Mum told me that love can hurt, but the pain will eventually go away with time. You probably also heard that from your friends, bu- but I really believe it's true."

His cheeks turned red when he remembered the holo conversation with his mother. Then Y/N told him something he wouldn't have expected:

"You're actually the first one who knows that we broke up..."

He blinked.

"Re-Really? Oh, wow... I uhhh... didn't expect that."

Her grip around his torso tightened, and he could feel how she smiled into his shirt. 

"Well, maybe I knew that you're a good comforter?" 

His heart skipped a beat. 

Oh, stars. 

Wait, was she able to hear how his heart was pounding fast right now? Please, no. Nooo-

"Is your heartbeat usually that fast?"

Her tone was slightly teasing, and she finally- sadly? - let go of him and backed away to look into his eyes. Ben averted his gaze, heat crept up his neck, and he was pretty sure that his ears were as red as her cushions on the sofa.

"Uhhh..."

She only laughed and wiped her eyes again, this time with her sleeve.

"I apologize, I might have decorated your shirt with uhh... my snot."

He grinned and dismissively waved his hand.

"It's fine. Not like I'm already covered in oil and dirt."

She studied his face, and her sharp gaze only embarrassed him further. 

"You really have an oil stain in your face," she commented, and he sighed.

"Yeah, uh... I met my Dad today."

Y/N's eyes widened, and she excitedly clapped her hands.

"What? Really?! How was it? Have you made up?"

He nodded. He realized that she seemingly wanted to change the topic, but he kind of didn't want to let her.

"We did, and it was really fun, but I... we..."

Ben really didn't know how to steer the conversation back into the direction of the breakup, but the young woman apparently picked up what he wanted to tell her.

She opened her mouth to speak, and her expression was somber: 

"I never told you, but I actually have a sister. She's six years younger than me and... disabled. Can't see and uhh... I've been working my ass off to pay for a surgery for her eyes. But it's really expensive. I can tell you, Coruscant is for the rich. Not that it isn't obvious or anything..."

He knew she was beginning to ramble, but he let her. He had to process her revelation first.

"But well, my boyfrie- ex-boyfriend... Cain... He wanted to pay for the surgery. He really likes - or at least liked Liah very much, and he had a steady income, so I... I really hoped he - uhh, you know..."

She avoided eye contact and looked down on her hands. 

"would pay for it?" he finished her sentence. 

Y/N nodded. He could sense her shame in the force, and he cringed. He didn't want her to feel like that, he could totally understand her thoughts. If his Mum or Dad... 

"But that's- that's not why I stayed with him while he was so, so angry, I just... Although he hit me and insulted me, I just- I really loved him - still do, and it just, fuck, Ben, it hurts so much."

He exhaled slowly through his nose.

What. What. What? What?

"He hit you...?" 

His tone was indifferent, he didn't even realize that he asked a question, too buried by his racing thoughts.

"Yeah, but- but he's not a bad person, just... He has terrible friends, and his work agitated him, and sometimes when he drank, it... it just happened.  But it wasn't hard, like, just a slap, actually, nothing serious, okay?"

Her voice was shaky and panicked when she tried to defend the man who had abused her.

Ben slowly stood up.

"Wha-What, Ben, hey, are you... where are you going?"

I... Dunno, just... home... I...

He turned and slowly walked to the hallway, Y/N hurried to her feet behind him and followed him bewildered.

"Hey, hey, are you alright?"

She stepped in front of him and put her hands on his shoulders.

"I gotta... That asshole, I have to-"

He couldn't form a normal sentence, he was so out of it. The black-haired man couldn't even feel his anger. There was a void inside his head, and the only thing that he knew at the moment was that he was going to kill someone. 

"Ben, no, hey. You don't have to do anything, alright? It's over. It's over between Cain and me."

"He hurt you."

Y/N paused, a little taken aback that he seemed to care so much about that.

"I know... But he won't anymore."

His eyes, who had rigidly faced forward, now landed on her. 

"Really?"

Her grip around his shoulders tightened, and she smiled weakly. She added:

"Yeah..."

The void cleared a little, and suddenly he could sense an emotion he wouldn't have expected in her force presence. It was relief? What for?

He slumped slightly, and Y/N, all of a sudden, stumbled, losing the strength in her legs. Ben caught her with his hands, and suddenly, she was pressed to the hallway wall. 

Their eyes connected, and both breathed in slowly.

"Sorry, I- I feel a little light-headed..."

He only nodded. His heart was pounding loudly in his ears, and his eyes were forcefully drawn to her lips. 

Fuck, he wanted to kiss her so badly. 

But how could he do that after she had just revealed that she had been abused by her ex-boyfriend? 

She stared at him, and he could see the wheels turning in her head. 

A realization washed over her face, he stepped back and abruptly let go of her as if he had burned his skin. 

She blinked, her hand still raised when he muttered an apology and stormed to the end of the hallway, and left the apartment.

"Sorry, I'm..."

Y/N stayed behind a lost expression on her face. She slid down the wall and sat on the floor. Her hands clasped over her head, and she snorted disbelievingly.

"Is Ben... with me...?"

-

As soon as he had left the apartment, he stopped. Did Y/N realize? Did she find out? 

An icy feeling welled up in his chest, and he heaved. 

"No, please, no."

He gripped his shirt and breathed in torturingly slow. There was so much going on inside his head. 

He hit her. She has a sister. She wanted him to pay for her sister's surgery. Probably stayed with him because of that even though he hit her. They broke up. She's single again. He abused her. I never knew. Never knew.

Ben ran his hands through his hair and grabbed a few strands harshly. The pain cleared his mind a little. 

Mortification hit him like a brick. He had listened to their arguments countless times. How many times had he just listened to Y/N being abused? 

"Oh, Stars, please..."

The sudden waterfall of emotions caused his eyes to prick, and he gasped in shame. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

His breath was shaky when the first tear spilled, and he gritted his teeth. 

What kind of friend was he?

He loved her and gazed at her often. How did he never realize? How did he not see?

"I'm so pathetic..."

He gulped and wiped the tears away.

I have to apologize.

He turned and walked back to Y/N's apartment door.

He didn't even knock this time, just straight up walked in.

"Y/N, I am so sorry for not reali-"

Two lips crashed onto his, and his words got swallowed by them. His eyes widened in shock when Y/N latched her arms around him, and he saw her face from so up close. Her cheeks were wet again, and he could taste salt on her lips.  

His hands grabbed her arms, and he returned the kiss clumsily. The knot of emotions in his chest exploded, and the world around him swiveled. 

Y/N tasted like soda, stardust, and Jogan fruit cake. All the things he had shared with her and loved. 

His heart seemed to have left his body because its pounding was so loud, it sounded like the drum of their favorite Twi'lek band. If this was a dream, he wanted it to never end. 

Until he noticed the echo of sadness in the force. 

Ben placed his hands on both sides of her head and slowly stood back, although he couldn't bear to part with her.

Both of them gasped for air as soon as their lips separated. Y/N slowly opened her eyes, and they were cloudy with emotions.

"What... What was that for?" he breathlessly asked, his tone timid.

She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out, and he bit his lip.

"Listen, Y/N, I- I like you. A lot."

"Yeah, kinda felt that just now..." she stammered, but her expression surprisingly lit up. 

Ben gulped. The thing he would say next would hurt him. But he had to say it. Otherwise, it would just hurt more.

"But I... I don't want to... I don't want to kiss you when I know that I'm not the only one in your heart."

She paused and slowly let go of him. Her gaze avoided his.

"I know I- I didn't kiss you because you're a replacement! I just... the look in your eyes and I..."

She stopped, seemingly knowing how she would only make it worse. She grabbed her own arm, and her fingernails dug into her skin.

He felt shame again. It was Y/N's. 

"I've fallen in love with you," his confession spilled over his lips seamlessly. 

Y/N raised her head abruptly, her expression a mix of surprise and shock.

"And I- this kiss I- I can only hope and pray that it means the same thing for you like it means for me."

"I-," she began, but he pressed a finger to her lips, tilted his head and smiled.

"But I don't want to rush anything. You just broke up with Cain, and I know your feelings aren't sorted out yet. I don't want you to regret anything, and I..." he lowered his head, "I also don't want to get hurt... Or hurt you."

She nodded.

"So... Can we take this slow?" he asked with a small smile. 

Y/N watched how he stretched out his hand and offered it to her. Her fingers intertwined with his. Her eyes turned into small crescents.

"I'd like that..."

.

.

.

3 months later

Loud voices woke him up. He sighed. Then he jumped out of bed.

"Y/N!"

He struck his holo com and deactivated the weather forecast transmission. 

Today is the day! 

Hastily, he grabbed the metal thing on the ground and stretched it up to the ceiling. A loud thudding rhythm echoed in the room. A few seconds later, the same rhythm could be heard from upstairs. Ben grinned from cheek to cheek and walked out of his bedroom. 

The remains of their movie night decorated his living room, and he carefully avoided standing on the popcorn on the floor. He would clean the mess up later. He went to shower and rushed through his washing routine.

The relationship between Y/N and him had changed after their sudden kiss. But it progressed slowly like Ben had asked for. She was truly not over Cain yet and had to figure out her feelings first. The young woman was thankful for the time he gave her. 

Although, he had begun to worry that she found out that her actions that day had been a mistake in the heat of the moment. 

But it apparently wasn't the case, and both of them together mended Y/N's broken heart, and it took her a while to realize that Ben had fixed it. Not through the power of love but through his friendship. He was understanding and patient, and the way he treated her with respect and adoration caused her heart to flutter.

"It happened!"

Was what she told him one day, and while he dumbfoundedly watched her, she just laughed and pecked his cheek. He turned beet-red almost immediately, and he couldn't hide his happiness. 

That day he wanted to hug her so badly, but he restrained himself. He had seen the way she flinched when he suddenly touched her and didn't want to risk it. The abuse she suffered may have caused only a few physical wounds but her mental scars were deep and would hurt for a long time. He would let her approach him first, just to be safe.

And Y/N did.

"Let's go on a date," she had whispered a week ago, and her breath caused shivers to rush over his spine. They decided to go on the weekend and now it had finally arrived.

Ben changed into the white shirt his mother had recommended him - yes, he told her about the stuff that had happened - and checked his looks in the mirror. 

His black hair was still damp from the shower, and he could feel a slight stubble on his chin, but all in all, he was happy with his appearance. The fact that the dark circles under his eyes had long disappeared satisfied him greatly.

He watched the clock on the wall, and his eyes widened in panic. 

"Uh oh."

With an inhumane speed, he rushed out of the bathroom, took his keys and black jacket, grabbed the basket on his kitchen table, and hurried to the front door. It only took him a few seconds to lock his apartment, press the elevator button, and step into it, ready to conquer the heart of the woman he loved. 

When he pressed the button to the 13th floor, he smiled. 

7 months ago, he stood in this elevator, ready to punch whoever decided to yell at each other at 3am in the morning. Now he was going there to take said neighbor on an awesome first date. Oh, how the tables turned.

The elevator pinged, and the door opened. He strutted to Y/N's door and knocked using their significant rhythm. 

A few seconds later, the door opened and in front of him stood the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

"H-Hi."

The corner of her lips twitched, and his heart fluttered.

"Hey, Ben."

[val-aquenta]

Angstpril for the prompt: Screaming

Not going to lie, but the prompt wasn’t followed greatly, but whatever

Here on ao3

Tatooine really was one big dusty planet in the outer rim. That was how Anaki- how it had been described quite a few times, often with a couple more disparaging comments added on. Despite the harsh land that caused dull pain in his back, and a soreness in his joints, Obi-Wan found that he sometimes found Tatooine nice. Meditating in a cool cave, the bones of an old creature floating around him, energy humming in the air, was an experience Ben found himself enjoying. It was easy, in meditation to forget, or to try to. Ben did not think he could ever look past the emptiness he now felt where once the links to various Jedi had remained, where the link to… Anakin had been. In meditation, though, he could look away from himself, could look into the galaxy. 

Of course, he often refrained from reaching out too far, fearful to draw the gaze of the Emperor or the apprentice, so he usually remained focused around Tatooine. Dusty, orange, sandy, and barren Tatooine. 

Interestingly enough, there were almost little pockets of condensed Force across the planets. In caves, canyons, and dunes, Obi-Wan found that there were hints of a past hidden in these points. While psychometry had never been a skill of his, he was most average in his Force powers with no tricks like Mace’s strange visions or Quinlan’s psychometry, he found himself being drawn into vague imprints of these pasts. Whether it was a young twi’lek running from slavery or if it was a Hutt grimly grinning at some gruesome display of strength, small imprints would find themselves to him, pressing against him. He could feel the grains of sand against a lekku, or the heat pressing against a tail. Sometimes it is uncomfortable or even painful, like the time he had stumbled across the site of a Krayt dragon’s death. The painful stabbing of hunger and fatigue and the knowledge of his… it’s slow decay was pressed onto him. Other times, it was the simple joy of holding a child close by. 

Regardless, he found himself going out and looking for these places. When he found one, he would note what he felt and what he thought might have happened in his journals. There was little else to do beyond occasionally checking in with the Lars, not too often as that would anger Owen, and keeping his own hovel clean. As such, he found it interesting to go out and document his own musings, his findings, or anything interesting he stumbled across. 

Today was such a day. His tattered cloak, patched multiple times yet still loyally hanging onto life, around his shoulders. A small pack of water and food strapped to his back and his lightsaber in his hands. He walked a long way, following the large canyon further than he had ever gone before. Occasionally an interesting rock or cave drew his attention, but something further out there called to him. 

His empty pouch slowly began to fill with small knick knacks he picked up. A piece of bone here, a rock that he could polish into jewelry there. Still, he felt himself being pulled towards some place in the distance. With a sigh, he climbed out of the canyon and pulled the hood more comfortably over his head. The suns were creeping closer to the edge of the horizon, drowning the already orange sand in an extra layer of deep red. It was rather picturesque, he admitted. If the grains of sand bothering his skin were ignored… and, come to think of it, the heat from the sun boring into his back, and the dryness of the air, and- If many things were ignored, Ben just might recommend it to someone for solely the beautiful sunset. 

The gentle sloping hills of sand flattened out into more solid, somewhat rocky terrain. The silver moons rising up cast a white light on the orange sand, though it left a gentle darkness. With night came the cool Obi-Wan very much enjoyed. The shade was a relief to the hot day. Still, the sand retained heat and, if he lay his palm across the surface, he might be able to feel an inkling of the heat curling into his hand. As time went on, the sand would lose its heat and become cold and soothing to touch, calmin Ben would say. 

Finally he stumbled across some… village? Tusken, most likely, if his knowledge of their lifestyle was to be trusted, which it honestly shouldn’t, he had met them a few times. Regardless, this town was empty. Fire had burned some of the huts. Nobody inhabited this place, obvious with the general decay of the huts. Some of them were crumbling, roofs fallen in. “I wonder why I’ve been brought here.” Ben mused out loud, taking a moment to stretch his back and muscles. He was young… well decently young, but the three years fighting a war paired with the years spent on Tatooine aged him prematurely. The rather vain part of him kept trying to hide it, but he had a fairly large crop of gray hairs that grew every day, the ginger ones being replaced by the wispier ones. 

Ben walked forwards, heeding the note of the force. Perhaps… some kind of fire had taken over the village, but they would probably have come here and fixed it or scavenged to help them survive. Perhaps… they had died? But there were no bodies? A mystery. Reaching the centre of the town, there was one hut, still largely intact. He could feel deaths here. Surprise, fear and… guilt? Interesting. Obi-Wan continued forward, parting the drapes of the hut and entering. The roof was still intact and there was no lighting, leaving the place dark. Nothing of interest was in the hut. A bed and a little cupboard by the side. Honestly, he did not want to meditate here where the echoes of death were still felt, but the Force spoke, so he left the hut and sat down, outside in front of the remains of the campfire that was half buried in sand.

In meditation, the imprints of death and fear were felt as well as a grand anger and pain. They felt… familiar. He sunk deeper, focusing on the feelings and asking the Force if that was all it wanted to show him. Suddenly, the Force exploded around him with anger that was definitely familiar. So familiar as he had felt it only a few years earlier in the heat of Mustafar. The familiar feeling brought tears to his eyes as he dug deeper, wondering when Anakin had been here. Perhaps, as a child he had experienced the town burn down. 

Ben pushed away his own feelings for a while, determined to focus on exactly what the Force wanted to show him. An image, just a flash of Anakin’s face, at the end of his apprenticeship with a braid falling down his side, illuminated by a fire was twisted in anger and grief. Confusion warred with caution and for a moment he considered pulling back, but he did not, burning the image to his memory before pushing it aside. Faintly, he noticed his bag was floating along with some stones and bits of plant. There was a pause as if the Force was giving this time to think about it, but Obi-Wan knew he had to know. What was Anakin involved with on Tatooine that he had no idea of.

“I slaughtered them.” Came a faint voice, Anakin’s voice Ben realised with horror, accompanied with imprints of fear. Not Anakin's fear, but the fear of a Tusken, a child. “Like animals.” The voice continues. Obi-Wan feels the knowledge brand itself against his heart. Even before his final fall from grace, Anakin had… had done this. He can feel tears rolling down his cheeks. Did he ever know Anakin?

A new voice, higher. Padmè. “To be angry is to be human.” Immediately the wailing of a Tusken child replaces her voice as the murderer, the killer, as Anakin steps forwards, blue light swinging. It hurts his ears. To be angry, yes, but to do this… not. The pain of betrayal burns. That Padmè had not said anything, had never revealed this stings his chest. There is a brief glimpse of a mother trying to cover the screaming children as Anakin advances, head bowed down, the shadows playing with his features to turn them sinister. The mother tries to hush the children, to send them away, but not moments later she is dead, a clean cut through the middle. The children cry out as he moves forwards, moving back and back until their backs are pressing against the hut’s walls. There is a brief moment where the killer stops and the Tusken children stop crying for a moment before the lightsaber rises against them. 

Obi-Wan feels them, hears them as they cry out. He does not realise how loud it was until there is a cold silence and he sees Anakin walking forwards, unlit lightsaber calmly clipped onto his belt. He stops, catching the noise of faint gasping breaths, faintly crying in pain. He turns and walks and walks until he sees the Tusken, this one an adult who has been wounded by the saber, their stomach cut cleanly. Fear filters out from the Tusken as they spot Anakin. Anakin raises a hand and, in a familiar move, clenches his fist until there is no life under his hands. 

Ben wrenches himself from the vision, falling forwards with a cry. Tears pour from his eyes as he looks around and notes where the Tusken people had fallen, where their bodies would have been had they not been buried by a different tribe. The town is silent, only the wind howling through every now and then. In the Force however, the violent deaths echo in a faint cry for help, mirroring what had happened that bloody night. Obi-Wan does not know how long he spends sitting there, trying to reconcile the fact that Anakin had committed these atrocities long before the fall of the Jedi. That he had lived a lie of bringing peace when he had slaughtered a village indiscriminately. Ben spends a long time sitting there, enough for the moons to rise high in the sky before he starts leaving. He must get home. His banthas need help and he has been gone long enough. He casts one final look at the burnt Tusken village before turning back to his home.

[letterstothemidnightsociety]

It's 2007 and somehow, miraculously, Supernatural survives yet another rocky (?) season of mediocre ratings to come back for a third season, or at least, half season, but that season starts out with a real bang! Like, just a real solid trio of an opener for season three. It reminds me of all the things I love about SPN and also it reminds us of all the things that frustrate the hell out of me on SPN. So where did we leave things off?

First up, there’s Dean, who sold his soul to the devil in order to bring Sam back from the dead. Sam, you’ll remember, was part of some overly complicated ponzi scheme to find the perfect vessel to open a door - yep, open a door - and lost to Aldous Hodge who just straight up murders Sam in the season finale. So Dean get’s Sammy back, but in exchange, he’s only got one year left before he permanently moves down south. Oh! And even though they got Sam back and Sam kills Aldous Hodge (RIP pal), they neglected to keep the door from opening. The door to Hell, that is, and now they’ve allowed a shiz ton of demons out to freely roam the earth. Way to go, boys, you lost again! They are two for two on these season finales guys!

OH but they DO kill the Yellow Eyed Demon, so that’s a plus, but not before he plants the most perfect seed of doubt in Dean’s mind - “How do you know what you brought back is all Sammy?” Like, ugh, UGH, ugh!!!! What a way to drive the knife in deeper! What a way to make the heart of this show slowly start to crumble! C’est Magnifique!! *chef's kissy fingers*

So with all that emotional baggage weighing us down, how do we start season 3? How else - with a threesome of course! And also some technicolor grading, it’s wild guys.

Oh boy guys, let’s talk about this opener for a hot sec. I got into it a little bit last season, but as much as I love Dean, you HAVE to admit that that boy is gross. Just like...he’s a little gross. I’m also old enough now to see exactly how many red flags he’s raising through the last 45 episodes. Like, sorry Little Me, but he is not boyfriend material. Not to mention that all this debauchery is 1,000% him distracting himself from the consequences of his own actions, but we’ll get into that later.

Meanwhile, Sam is doing something constructive and trying to figure out how to reverse the curse and save Dean’s soul. And here we have the culmination of two seasons worth of character development - faced with the imminent demise of Dean Samuel Winchester, Sam tries to step up and take care of his brother for once in his life; Dean parties like it’s 1999. There were two things I thought of during this episode - 1) isn’t this not unlike the sort of behavior you see in suicidal people who have finally decided to take their own life? Which is just, like, further held up by the fact that Dean’s big monologue at the end literally has the line “Truth is I’m tired, Sam. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel.” and like...dude, you are NOT ok! Why isn't??? ANYONE??? ADDRESSING THIS????? And 2) Dean is sharing a lot of similarities with the demons in this episode.

Because MEANwhile, there’s demons! So many demons! Specifically, the Seven Deadly Sins ones, but also, spoiler alert, Ruby, who is gettin’ reeeeealll into that ketchup.

All these baddies just really taking advantage of their time topside cuz Hell is, as they so artfully put it, it’s like Hell, so they’re just livin’ it up while they still can ~almost like foreshadowing or something~?!?!?

Real talk though, it being a real long time since I’ve watched this season, it’s these kinds of details that I’m impressed with this time around. There is so much character work that goes into this show and it’s something I definitely connected with the first time around, but not on conscious level. Now I can look at it through time and experience and articulate what I’m seeing, which makes this re-watch infinitely more enjoyable.

Episode 1 of this season continues what they started in season 2 and just keeps building out that Hunter Community. Like, there really is a whole Community out there that keeps in contact and works together and makes sure everyone’s up to date on the latest hot goss, and it all makes John Winchester come off like a real creepy splinter cell lone gunman type. And that in turn makes the Winchester sons look like total, unprofessional boneheads who managed to open a portal to Hell. “UGH Great Jorb Guys, but can we blame them? They’re John’s kids,” is a conversation between hunters that I am headcannoning, but also 100% support.

Honestly, I love the idea of the Winchesters being just these real, like, b-grade, Walmart Brand Hunters that other Hunters are just SO done with. We kind of see a little bit of that with Isaac and Tamara, but by the end of the episode, the Winchesters prove that they’re...better Hunters? I hope somewhere in the next 12 seasons I get an episode that is told from another Hunter’s POV who is legitimately better/more emotionally balanced than the Winchesters and the whole episode is them just, like, cleaning up a bunch of Winchester messes like, SONuvabitch, these two ASSholes. I think we see a fair amount of episodes from the POV of people who are less qualified than the Winchesters who end up being mentored by them, but I’d be stoked for them to run into just a group of people who hate them for totally legitimate, professional vs amature reasons.

Bobby does not count because Bobby signed up to be their Dad and so he agreed to take care of their messes when he took that job.

And then we get to “The Kids Are Alright” which showcases one of my fav changes for this season - BRIGHTLY! LIT! HIGH! SATURATION!!!! And of course, by fav, I mean, Most Hilarious.

I do walk a fine line on this one truth be told. Like, season 1 was definitely going for A Look. It’s super gritty and high contrasty and stylized. Now, I got what they were going for but I wasn’t always crazy about it, mostly because the quality on the DVD’s was terrible. Quick tip for everyone: in order to get 2+ hours worth of content on a DVD, you have to compress the final edit of the program to a pretty small bitrate. When we drop videos onto DVD’s at my work (it isn’t often, thank goodness), the discs themselves only hold, like, 2GB worth of content and that is NOT A LOT when it comes to video files. The more compressed a video file is, the less detail you’re gonna get in the visuals. Watching episodes on Netflix (where everything’s probably at a higher bitrate and therefore is a better quality visual), it’s not bad, but on my DVDs, the compression is so heavy that we get SUPER hot highlights and SUPER crunchy shadows - what a lot of people would called “crushed blacks” because you’ve lost all the detail in the shadows and you’re left with a grainy, noisy, black hole on the screen. Like I lost so much detail in the pilot episode guys, I could not make out this guy’s face.

A rough approximation of my DVD quality. Still recommend it over Netflix for the Accurate Soundtrack tho.

Season 2 SPN toned that Look down a lot, like, a lot a lot. Enough that you still got the general vibe they were going for but not enough that you couldn’t make out faces anymore. But through this whole process, the CW execs kept pushing for the show to look lighter, more colorful, less film noir more...well, CW. And in season 3 it finally happened!!!

I get what those execs were going for, but also, I feel like the colorists on these first few episodes just REALLY went wild out of spite. Lookit this shot from “Magnificent Seven” right before Envy causes some rando innocent bystander to beat a girl to death for her shoes -

GREEN GREEN GREEN GREEN!!!! I WONDER WHICH SIN THIS GUY IS????

Then in “The Kids Are Alright” the birthday party looks like everything is coated in day-glow neon.

The Winchester Bros look like they just got back from 3 weeks in Aruba - LOOK at the saturation levels in these skin tones! LOOK AT THEM!!

My screencap ability aside, only in SPN can a cemetery at night have brighter lighting than a diner in the middle of the afternoon.

This is definitely a thing I will be tracking the rest of the season because I have a distinct memory of a future episode where the brothers have been magically gifted completely different lives where they were never Hunters, they know nothing of Hunting, and they’re completely normal until the end when everything gets snapped back and the episode literally changes colors. V. Excited to see just how saturated this season stays through the end.

But maybe more importantly in “The Kids Are Alright” we learn that Dean does NOT, in fact, have a son. Not that he would be a good father...well...maybe? I mean, this Dean, this season 3, definitely-suicidal, completely-reckless, can’t-keep-it-together Dean, is not good Dad material. Later seasons Dean? Probably fine? Earlier seasons Dean might ALSO be fine? And if he’d found out that Ben was his legitimate kid, it could have made a WORLD of difference, who knows. I know he ultimately does become father-like to Ben and that gives me a lot of feelings. But this Dean is not in a good place to take care of anyone, including himself and really, someone ought to do something about that.

I gotta say, this is an actual bummer. I can’t remember if, in the later seasons, they do any clarifying on this or not, but I am legitimately bummed that Ben is not Dean’s kid and that as far as we know, Dean has no natural children floating around out there with surly attitudes and soft hearts. Dean’s motivation from Day 1 has always been family and despite what comments he may make in early seasons, Dean’s secret desire is to have the wife and the kids and the dog and the white picket fence. And honestly, we’re only 3 seasons in and I just want Dean to have nice things!!

And then guys, we come to “Bad Day at Black Rock,” and I just...WHAT a masterpiece. I had almost NO memory of ever watching this episode before and I don't understand why. What a glorious masterpiece this episode is. Let’s make a list -

More Hunters™, who should be really annoying but were actually kinda charming in a Marx Brothers kind of way

Gordon’s in jail, where he belongs, but also is masterminding a coup against the Winchesters which is A+ spooky stuff

Slapstick comedy that I didn’t know I was missing from my life

Bela F*cking Talbot

Guys, I think this is my fav episode so far purely because I felt, while watching it, that the last 10 years of my life were not in vain and that I had in fact grown as a human person. I remembered hating Bela Talbot. Like, I DID. NOT. LIKE. HER. To the point that I questioned if her British accent was even real. It is, her mother is from the UK and she lived there for a time, but like, honestly, the audacity of Little Me.

This time around? Oh she’s defs my new fav. Just everything about her is like, A+, Great Job, Why-Did-We-Cancel-Her??? Like, oh yeah, probably because somewhere in here they try to shoehorn a romantic side plot with Dean. I don’t actually mind rioting over shoehorned romance, but also, if they’d let this play out for a season or two and then got the two of them to bone? I’m on board. I’m 100% on board.

Maybe it’s just that she is unapologetically out for herself, maybe it’s the fact that she is definitely a match for the Winchesters in a non-murdery way, probably it is both of those things. She's smart, she’s crooked, she has impeccable taste, she’s honestly a helluva lot of fun and I am so excited to see more of her and so BUMMED that she will not make it past this season.

Despite the fact that I absolutely adore all three of these episodes, they also bring up the problem that I was starting to see in season 2 - WHO is this show about? Isn’t it supposed to be about the Brothers as a whole? But the majority of these first three lean pretty heavily on Dean’s emotional arc. Granted, it makes sense. I mean, of COURSE Dean’s demon deal is gonna be the BIG thing in a season where he is literally staring down the barrel, but knowing that there’s a side plot about Is Sam Evil?? seems like...something we should really explore more? I believe it comes up in season 4, or at least, Sam’s demon-blood powers become a bigger deal in season 4, but I would have enjoyed seeing Sam have a more active stake in this season. I can see planting some weird new ticks being planted for Alive-Again Sam that just get weirder and darker and then a mid-season finale or a run up episode to the end of the season where Dean (finally) decides he needs to stop his demon deal because he needs to stick around so he can keep Sam from going completely off the rails. As much as I love Dean 5ever, I do think the show works best when the emotional weight of the season is distributed equally is all. And to be fair to the writers this season, there could have been a bigger plan for something like that but they ran out of time - their season was cut by about a third due to the Writer’s Strike.

Still, all in all, a solid opening to the third season. I want to say that these episodes feel like Classic SPN, but then I remember that this is season three out of fifteen. These ARE Classic SPN. Mostly self contained with enough emotional drama to remind us of the overarching plot. Maybe a little heavy on the emotional drama, but Dean’s only got a year to live and the show’s only got 16 episodes to resolve that crisis, so it’s fine.

[problems-turn-fics]

listen charles made me watch the show and now im writing fic for it so please enjoy my nameless “we were totally into each other as teenagers and kissed once but we never talked about it and i thought you hated me and now we’re adults and we have to talk about it” fic. words: 3293

Ben jumped from rock to root as he tried to make as little noise as possible on his way down to the cove. It was late at night and he was far enough away from any house that he shouldn’t have had to worry but it had rained that day and the leaves and mud made for a slippery walk and he’d wiped out enough to learn his lesson. It was better to take his time and be quiet than it was to get laughed at for being covered head to toe in mud.

Caleb was already at the shore, skipping rocks on the waves, as Ben jumped the last few feet down onto the rocky shore. Caleb turned around with a grin on his face. The beard he had decided to grow weeks ago was finally starting to come in and Ben had to remind himself that staring would only cause trouble. “Took you long enough,” Caleb said.

“Dad stayed up late working on Sunday’s sermon,” Ben said, brushing off a few dead leaves from the piece of driftwood he and Caleb had pulled up a few months ago to act as a bench for their late-night meetups.

Caleb half-turned back to the water to throw his last rock, it landed with a harsh thunk into the water. “Must be a real good one he’s cooking up,” he said. He came towards Ben and stopped for a second to dig around between the log and the sharp incline into the woods. “Ah!” he said triumphantly, holding up a bottle of rum. He sat heavily next to Ben with a sigh as he worked the cork out of the top.

“Why even bother hiding it? No one's going to come looking for us here,” Ben asked, taking the bottle when it was offered and taking a drink. He wasn’t quite used to the burn yet but he did enjoy it. Or he told himself he enjoyed it. Sometimes it was hard to tell the difference between what he actually wanted and what he was expected to want at sixteen.

“I wasn’t hiding it,” Caleb said, taking it back and drinking. Ben forced himself to look away and out over the water. The sight of Caleb’s lips touching the same bottle where Ben’s lips had just been always made him light-headed. “I was tryin’ to keep it safe so you didn’t knock it over again.”

“That was one time,” Ben said, rolling his eyes.

“One time too many.”

Ben pushed at Caleb’s shoulder, almost knocking him off the log. “See?! You almost made me spill it this time!”

Ben rolled his eyes and took the bottle to an affronted noise from Caleb. “Now you don’t have that problem,” Ben said, taking another drink with a grin. Caleb just smiled at him, shaking his head. For a while they were quiet.

It wasn’t the type of quiet that needed to be filled, though Ben could admit he had a hard time telling the difference, it was just quiet. It was like the moment of peace right before you fell asleep after a long day of hard work. Serene.

They’d been sneaking out together for years, but over the last few months it’d stopped being “sneak out to go do something stupid with Abe and Anna and Selah” to “sneak out to sit at the shore and drink enough to feel like adults and just talk.” They didn’t even talk about anything exciting or particularly interesting. Some days it would be gossiping about someone in town, other nights it would be talking about what they planned to do as soon as they could get out of town. There were even nights when they barely spoke and Ben had to be shaken awake by Caleb after falling asleep on his shoulder.

A small part of him missed the excitement of getting up to trouble in the dead of night with his other friends but a larger part wouldn’t trade these nights for the world.

Their friends must have been on Caleb’s mind too because he broke the silence. “How long do you think it will be before Abe and Anna get caught? It’s been going on for months now you’d think that someone besides us would have noticed.”

Ben laughed sharply. The chill in the air was gone and he was a little flushed though that might have just been what Caleb had said. He tried very hard never to think about Abe and Anna. “Someone will have to notice if they aren’t careful,” Ben said as he took another drink. He almost regretted it when Caleb laughed loudly and Ben struggled to control his grin.

“You dirty bird,” Caleb said, taking the bottle back and drinking. “What do you know about being careful?”

“More than you,” Ben shot back.

“Benny Boy, don’t lie to me. You’ve never so much as been kissed,” Caleb said rolling his eyes.

“Yes, I have,” Ben shot back before he could stop himself. He had been kissed. It had been an awkward stilted uncomfortable thing that he hadn’t cared to repeat and for a while, he told himself that was why he didn’t tell Caleb. But even on the few times that he’d tried to say it something had stopped him short. He knew, somewhere deep in his chest, that if Caleb knew he’d kissed Martha behind the schoolhouse something would change. Caleb would change and Ben was more afraid of losing him than he was of anything else.

“You’re full of shite. You’ve never gotten within ten feet of a woman who wanted anything to do with you,” Caleb said, still cackling. “Or you would have told me.”

But now Ben had to either lie and back down or he had to come clean and admit to hiding it from Caleb and neither seemed like a good choice. So instead Ben was moving without thinking, leaning in towards Caleb who had gone completely still.

That didn’t last for long because their lips barely brushed before Caleb snapped away as if it burned. “Don’t,” Caleb said, sharper than he ever got with Ben. Sharper than he ever got with anyone, really. But then he laughed and Ben felt the tight feeling in his stomach move to his chest and his blood go cold. He couldn't breathe. “Don’t do things you’ll regret when the sun’s up and you’re sober,” Caleb said with an empty laugh.

Ben forced out a laugh too. “Right. I should go home. Get to bed.”

Caleb shot up off of the log and towards the water, the bottle gripped tightly in his hand. “Good idea.”

Ben stood, brushed himself off, and was barely able to croak out a “good night” before he headed back into the woods. He stumbled home not from the booze but because the tears that were burning his eyes were blurring his vision and he couldn't breathe. He’d ruined everything and he knew it.

Caleb wouldn’t sell him out and no one would believe him even if he tried but that seemed like a small consultation when Ben knew he’d just ruined the one good thing he had. He sat down at the fence line of his father’s property, pulled his knees up to his chest, and let out a sob where no one could hear him.

He wouldn’t act without thinking again.

**

The sight of Setauket was something Caleb thought he’d always recognize no matter how many years it had been or if it was pitch black on a night with no moon. He could make out the shore where he had skipped rocks as a child and the barest lights of town through the trees. There was a chill to the wind but with summer on its way, the cool air was more than welcome.

He lifted his oar and placed it quietly next to him as he crouched lower and rode the momentum and current to shore. There wasn’t much light and Caleb was almost to shore when he realized why it was that the sunbleached driftwood where he had spent days sitting as a teenager looked odd; someone was sitting on it.

He crouched lower but if he could see them he was sure they could see him, or at least see the boat. Maybe he could get the drop on them if they didn’t know someone was inside. With his head barely over the edge enough for him to see,  Caleb waited, unmoving, to recognize who it was. As soon as he did he sat up a little, no longer worried about being caught.

Ben had stood up once he saw the boat and taken another step forward when Caleb had sat back up. He was taller now but there was still a softness to his face that Caleb would recognize anywhere. “Ben?” Caleb whispered over the water.

He must not have recognized Caleb before because in a moment everything about Ben shifted. His eyes lit up and a grin spread across his face as he took a step forward into the water. “Caleb?” For a moment Caleb’s heart stopped and he felt like he was fifteen years old again locked in a daydream of Ben waiting patiently for him to return from an adventure, ready with a kiss of relief that Caleb had made it back to him. He’d thought he’d left those dreams behind years ago, the last time they had been alone on the shore of their little cove, but one look at Ben and he was falling all over again.

The grind of soft sand against the bottom of the boat brought him to a stop and back to reality. Caleb jumped out, and in a second they were both standing in knee-deep water hugging each other tightly. Caleb pulled back first, holding Ben by the shoulders. “Look at you. It’s been ages.”

Ben smiled at him, starting to step back and grabbing the bow of the boat to help Caleb pull it further onto land. “What are you doing here?”

“A man can’t sneak back home anymore?” Caleb asked, securing the boat to a tree as Ben sat back down on the log. Caleb sat heavily on the other end, popping his back to distract himself from the lump in his throat. A part of Caleb was warmed by the sight of the driftwood every time he came into the cove. It was a permanent reminder of what they had been. They’d pulled it to shore together, they’d sat there together, and now it sat waiting for some other lovesick fool to sneak out at night with someone who was only supposed to be a friend and sit under the stars. Now, after everything that had happened, it felt loaded to even sit there with Ben. “What are you doing out here?”

 “I needed to get some fresh air.”

“You and the old man at it again?” Caleb asked with a laugh.

“No. Actually, he’s almost proud of me,” Ben said with a laugh.

“Oh, wow. Is that a bad thing these days?” Caleb had spent hours listening to Ben complain about never being enough, or sometimes being too much, for his dad. But things changed and Caleb had been gone a long time. “What’d you do? Finally propose to a pretty woman? Gonna settle down and have a couple of kids?” Caleb ignored the way his heart clenched at the idea of Ben married with kids running around after him. He’d thought he’d made peace with it a long time ago but it stung just the same.

Ben laughed. “No, I...uh...joined the Continental Army.”

Caleb’s blood went cold. “Are you out of your fuckin’ mind?”

Ben bristled and straightened up. “No, this is the-”

“You’re gonna go risk your life for some fantasy of living without a ruler?”

“The people will choose their own representatives. That makes a difference.”

“That’s what they say today but how long will that last? Have you heard the way they talk about Washington? One George out for another,” Caleb snapped at him, standing up and pacing around for a second. Ben always cut straight through all of Caleb’s carefully crafted facades to drive him mad.

Ben stood up too, following Caleb, unwilling to relent even a few feet of space when they were arguing. At least some things never changed. “Washington earned his title,” Ben continued but Caleb wasn’t really listening.

“And that’s if you lot win. You could die well before then!”

“At least I’d be dying for my principles unlike you,” Ben shot at him.

Caleb turned on him. “And just what the shite is that supposed to mean?”

“You put your life on the line for a few pounds and the chance to run away from me,” Ben said, pointing a finger in Caleb’s chest.

“What in the hell are you on about? I didn’t run away from you,” Caleb said. It wasn’t completely true. He had been running away but not from Ben. Caleb had been planning to leave Setauket a long time, Ben had just reminded him of why it was important that he left sooner rather than later.

“Really?” Ben laughed, clearly set in his idea that Caleb had fled, setting Caleb's teeth on edge. He wasn’t a brave man but he didn’t like being called a coward any more than the next person. “Because that’s what it looked like to me. You were obviously afraid I-”

Caleb cut him off by grabbing him and kissing him hard.

It was a proper kiss, unlike the last time. That had barely been a brush of their lips even if Caleb did still selfishly consider it his first kiss. But now he was holding the back of Ben’s neck and they were chest to chest and Caleb felt like crying. He broke the kiss and took a stumbling step backward. “I am not afraid of anything.” He hoped they could both pretend his voice hadn’t cracked.

Ben just stared at him, mouth hanging open as the waves continued to crash against the shore. They seemed louder than before.

Caleb took a step forward and to the side, intending to move past Ben and into the woods to actually go see his uncle as he’d intended to before this whole thing started. But Ben grabbed his wrist and pulled him in and they were kissing again. This time Ben was the one holding Caleb in place by the back of his neck and Caleb let his arms wrap around Ben to pull him even closer.

For once Caleb let himself revel in the closeness and the feeling of Ben’s lips on his and the way his other hand had settled on Caleb’s back. He let himself memorize the smell and the taste and the feel of the moment. The sound of the waves and the bugs and the wind faded until all Caleb could hear was their breathing. Every inch of him felt alive and buzzing and he was hyper-aware of everywhere they were touching, and even more so of everywhere they weren’t. He was desperate to get closer even though a small part of his mind was still telling him that he shouldn’t. Maybe he could have just a few minutes of bliss before Ben came to his senses.

And he did have a few minutes, even if they were shorter than he’d like, before Ben pulled away enough to break the kiss, though his hands stayed put, holding Caleb close.

“Oh,” Ben whispered, sounding a little out of breath. He probably was. Caleb was definitely short of breath.

“Yeah,” Caleb said with a laugh.

For a few minutes, they just stood there together until Ben broke the silence.

“Then why’d you leave?” Ben whispered, his thumb gently stroking the side of Caleb’s neck. “If you weren’t running away from me then why?”

“I wasn’t running from you. I was running from what I wanted from you. I knew it then and I know it now: this will only hurt you.” Caleb closed his eyes and tried to pull away but Ben only held him tighter. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

Ben laughed and kissed him again, short and sweet, and leaving Caleb desperate for a thousand more just like it. “You won’t. I know you.”

Caleb shook his head. “You don’t know that part of me. This part.” Instead of trying to pull away this time though, he rested his head on Ben’s shoulder. “You don’t know how much I want.”

“What about me? What about what I want?”

Caleb laughed and shook his head. “You want a nice girl to settle down with and, apparently, to win a war.”

“I do want to win this war,” Ben said, grabbing Caleb’s shoulders and pushing him back so that Caleb had to look at him. “But I don’t need a nice girl if I have you.”

“You’ve always had me, Benny Boy,” Caleb said with a smirk.

“Then I guess that’s why I never found a nice girl,” Ben said with a grin.

Caleb laughed and took a step back and this time Ben let him go. “What about your war? You won’t be back here for a long while and I never know where I’m going too far in advance,” Caleb said with a  shrug. He could feel the hope blooming in his chest and he needed to stamp it out before it started to hurt him. “What am I supposed to do? Sit around and wait for you to come home?”

Ben bit his lip and looked to the ground for a moment and Caleb knew he’d won. Ben was out of ideas and stalling. Caleb would have let out a sigh of relief if he’d been able to breathe past the lump in his throat.

“See I-”

“You could come with me,” Ben said suddenly, looking up and smiling like he’d figured something out.

Caleb let out a surprised laugh but one look at Ben and he knew he was serious. “Come on. You know I’m not much of an Army man.”

Ben visibly deflated. “Of course,” he said with a nod. Caleb felt something in his break. “I supp-”

“How do we know that we’d even be together?”

Ben perked back up and Caleb could've kicked himself. Apparently where Benjamin Tallmadge was concerned Caleb was still 16 years old with a crush on his best friend.

“I know someone who can make sure we stick together. You just have to say yes,” Ben said with a grin. The smug bastard knew he'd won.

“Fine. Now I have to go before my uncle falls asleep waiting for me,” Caleb said, finally stepping past Ben towards the woods. It was getting late and Caleb really did have to go. Summer nights were short.

“Wait,” Ben said, grabbing his arm and pulling him back for another kiss, soft and sweet and lingering.

Caleb smiled up at him. “You gonna do that all the time now?”

“Whenever I can.”

“I’mma hold you to that.”

Ben pushed him away towards the woods again, both of them laughing a little louder than they should have. “Go.”

Caleb gave him a mocking salute. “See you on the road, Tallboy.”

Ben shook his head at him, and Caleb turned around to start his walk, still grinning so hard it hurt. Joining the military just to stay close to one man wasn’t something Caleb could honestly say he had expected to do -- it seemed much more up Abe or Ben’s ally, to be honest -- but it wasn’t the first dumb decision he’d made concerning Ben Tallmadge and he was certain it wouldn’t be the last.

[xenoredux]

The Legend of Silver Fang - Episode 4: The Gang Wars

If you haven’t read episode 3 yet, you can do so here.

As mentioned before, the major story beats and overarching plot are the same. This is written under the supposition that, in fantasy land, this is a mini series with episodes that run about 2 hours in length each.

Some things to be aware of going in:

This story is violent as shit!!! CONTENT WARNING FOR: Animal injuries, animal death, drowning, cannibalism, disembowelment, illness via poisoning, and other bloody Epic Bruh Moments. Maybe don’t read ahead if dead animals upset you

I was trying to achieve a decent adaptation that combines the strongest elements of the anime and manga. It will not be precisely like either and will occasionally totally deviate from both

This isn’t meant to be “better” then the canon. It’s just the way I’d go about rewriting the Akakabuto arc if I had that level of ungodly power lol

Character designs made to represent several mentioned characters can be found here, here, here, here, and here. Others will be left up to the reader’s interpretation. A link to the next episode will also be provided at the end. If a link isn’t available, the next episode just hasn’t been posted yet!

YES THIS IS THE ONE WITH THE NINJAS IN IT

The first, second, and third platoons are heading to Kasumi Dake. It's an admittedly creepy part of their road trip. The mountain is as misty as its name implies, as is the surrounding, half-dead forest.

To make matters worse/spookier, the once pale blue sky has turned a garish grey, and thunder rumbles as it begins to rain. The Kai Bros confirm they're on the right trail to the mountain, so none of the more crybabyish among them (lookin' at you, Hyena) have an excuse to leave.

Still, it'll be harder to deal with this matter during a storm, so the army huddles together under a rock overhang, being afforded just enough room to keep out of the weather's way. The Kai Bros detail how much of a bullheaded pig Moss is as everyone listens. Akatora says that Old Fattycakes has been trying to cagoule he and his brothers into joining his dogmafia for legit years now, and he just gets madder every time they tell him to get lost.

Unexpectedly, Ben gives a heaping helping of benefit-of-the-doubt to this crimelord, insisting that he's got to have something going for him if he has a huge pack. At the very least he must hold a belief his followers share. Nobody can hazard a guess as to what such an ideology could be, but it gets the dogs thinking.

Cross says this means they should try to handle the situation peacefully if they can, only launching a full blown takedown if Moss proves he's just your run-of-the-mill dictator. The Kai Bros aren't happy to hear the army might go soft on Moss, but they don't complain.

A moment later, Hyena begins to slink away from camp. Great asks where he's going and the Weimeranar twitches, says he needs to take a leak. Hyena says he could always stay under the rock, though he's not sure if he'll be able to keep from wetting himself much longer, and Great is so icked out that he all but tells Hyena in an Italian accent that it's time to take a piss.

Hyena snorts and tells the crew to keep an eye on the group's baby as he might wet himself instead, and he's already gone by the time Gin realizes he was being picked on by a nerd twice his age.

Smith laughs and tells Gin not to take anything Hyena does to heart. He's always been a wormy little guy. That's probably why he falls in behind Sniper so easily. He doesn't have the balls to pull any nasty tricks without his German Nanny around. Gin laughs and tugs on Smith's ear appreciatively.

It would seem as if Smith doesn't know Hyena as well as he thinks, though, because Hyena, though he did stop to pee, is up to some nasty business indeed. He's wandered into the forest, howling gingerly to attract the locals' attention.

He garners a response as a booming, gravely voice tells him to either state his business or get the fuck off his lawn. Several dogs who exude the same energy as smoking bikers with sleeve tattoos encircle him, cornering him against a boulder. As Hyena hyperventilates, he looks up top the boulder and shrieks.

Hyena's gaze meets with that of the biggest, heaviest dog he's ever seen. Shorter then Ben but with twice his body weight, the animal is a hulking English Mastiff mix with a spiked collar and, curiously, a coat mottled with zipper scars from stitches long since healed.

Beside the dog are two others; like bookends, they stand beside him, the leftmost looking like a slender, younger clone of the absolute unit of a dog and the rightmost being a Siberian Husky. There's no doubt about who the big guy is: Kasumi Dake's own godfather, Moss.

Miles and miles away, Hidetoshi leaves the hospital to head to a board meeting. Outside of the hospital, Daisuke is standing in the rain with a colorful, cartoon character clad umbrella. Hidetoshi tells Daisuke he should go home, Gohei's asleep and it's past visitation hours. Daisuke shakes his head and looks at John. The dog tries to follow Hidetoshi into his car but is gently pushed away.

Before Hidetoshi drives off, he gives Daisuke a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry about Gin's disappearance," he says. "We'll find him someday, I promise you that." Before Daisuke can respond, the good doctor has already put peddle to metal.

Daisuke sulks and begins to walk home, seemingly lost in thought. John sighs melodramatically as he wanders through a pet door into Hidetoshi's office. The shepherd's eyes float across the photos adorning the walls, each one reigniting a memory of bloody exploits past. John scoffs about how Hidetoshi - and most of the men in the village, for that matter - have given up hunting, which just goes to show how much of a pack of quitters humans are.

His mind wanders to Gin. He's been thinking of the Akita more and more these days, mulling over their last exchange. If he's to be perfectly honest, John's gotta admit that he's fearful for his sorta-friend's wellbeing.

Enough is enough. All inaction and no killing makes John a dull boy, so it's time to return to the mountains. He'll kill three birds with one stone: make sure Gin is okay, return him to Daisuke (by force if necessary), and maybe kill a tyrannical bear or two if he has time for it. John smugly grins at his totally foolproof plan as he runs out. It's time to become the village hero. It's time to actually make a difference.

The rain finally lets up. Back under the rock the dogs are coming to realize this, and so they begin leaving their resting place. Akatora reminds Ben once more that he and his bros are, like, SUPER willing to kill Moss if he doesn't listen to reason, to which Ben, with his most fatherly of smiles, tells them to start chillin' with the killin'.

But before anyone does anything, Gin points out that Hyena never came back from his pee break. Ben heaves an exasperated sigh. Gin gathers this isn't the first time Hyena's pulled some dumb, inconvenient shit.

Smith mutters about "that goddamn idiot" under his breath before saying he'll do the honors of finding the lost complaint factory. Having begun to strike up a friendship with Smith, Gin channels his inner five year old and excitedly asks Ben if he can go with.

Ben allows the boy he's essentially adopted to run off with his friend and the two young dogs scampering off. Ben chuckles and says dogs Gin's age always need a reason to keep moving. A moment later the group departs.

Meanwhile, Hyena has been filling Moss's head with both disgustingly transparent flattery and heinous lies. The story the little traitor's come up with goes something like this: he's a feral dog living with a nomadic pack run by a dude called Ben. The pack has recently encountered the infamous Kai Ken Short Kings who've tricked Ben into thinking Moss was seeking to destroy all competing packs. This has led to Ben waging war on Kasumi Dake. Poor Ben is just too stupid and smelly to know any better, but he's powerful and dangerous to trifle with nevertheless.

Moss smells a rat - possibly a large, grey, snively one - but he allows Hyena to leave his territory unharmed. He turns to the Mini-Moss at his side and asks what he thinks of the situation, addressing him as Jaguar.

Jaguar is Moss's son from a litter wherein he was the only survivor. He's only 2 years old, just a touch older then Gin is. The youngster puts on a bold face and says that he doesn't believe any pack's leader would buckle to three dogs he dwarfs just to start a random war. Moss agrees, saying that the Kai Bros are too up their own asses to recruit assistants anyway.

That said, the husky at his side, Lloyd, still believes caution should be taken. The little wormy guy might've been lying about the Kai Bros, somehow having discovered their beef with Moss, but there's no saying a large pack of feral dogs couldn't be seeking to do them harm.

Moss decides to send two of his men to spy on the pack and learn more about its intentions. In a parallel to Gin's departure with Smith, Jaguar asks if he and Lloyd may do said spying, his desire being to prove himself to his old man. Moss agrees so long as his son keeps himself safe, and he proudly watches the two slink off into the forest.

Elsewhere, Gin and Smith are trying and failing to find Hyena. Smith's getting increasingly annoyed at the little bugger, cursing and complaining about the inconvenience. Suddenly, both he and Gin smell something coming. It's not Hyena, but someone else. Two other someone elses, in fact. The two run and hide somewhere they won't be spotted to watch their new company.

As Gin and Smith sit atop a rocky ledge, two unfamiliar dogs run by. Smith hazards a guess that they're two of Moss's men as and the two strangers come to a stop. Gin and Smith gasp - Hyena is standing in the strangers' way! Moss's dudes ask what Hyena's still piddlefarting around here for when, in a shocking display of effort, Hyena lashes out and bites the Mastiff in the neck.

Gin and Smith can barely contain themselves - what the hell is this idiot doing?! He's going to get everyone in trouble! Gin can't stand by and let this happen. He's about to spring into action but stops when he notices a dark shadow descending on the group.

The shadow is from an illusive cling-on the pack hadn't realized was following them: General Sniper! The Doberman dives onto Lloyd, landing the perfect blow and snapping the Husky's neck on impact. Lloyd dies instantly, his body tumbling to the ground. Sniper gives a wildly cliche evil laugh. He turns to a confused Jaguar as the Mastiff punts Hyena aside.

Jaguar runs to Lloyd's side and starts shaking him in an effort to revive him. Sniper just guffaws and tells Moss's precious son that his death is necessary for the cause. That cause being, of course, a war between Moss and Ben's packs, a war which will hopefully lead to Ben's demise. He punctuates his insidious plan by slashing open Jaguar's left shoulder, sending the inexperienced dog rolling in the dirt.

Meanwhile, on the cusp of the village, Daisuke is looking around the forest, bow clutched in hand. He's calling Gin's name and murmuring about how his dog had had a strange fascination with the feral pack in the area. Could Gin have come out here? And Daisuke had thought the rain had let up, what is this sticky substance dripping onto his shoulder?

The child turns to see he's being overlooked by a bigass bear with a set of hugeass teeth. As he screams bloody murder, the bear begins climbing down towards him. The animal roars hideously at Daisuke as it approaches.

While Daisuke cowers and falls on his ass, the shadow of a dog passes over him and snags hold of the animal's muzzle. It's John, heroically putting the kibosh on his departure so he can save the shrieking boychild.

Back at Kasumi Dake, Gin's had enough. He leaps down from his hiding place and bops Sniper upside the head, smacking him just far away enough to distance him from Jaguar. Smith joins Gin while the brindle scolds Sniper for his heinous deed, fully planning to follow his chiding up with an asskicking.

Smith joins in the Sniper-bashing bonanza by spitting in Sniper's face and telling him he can pull whatever bullshit he wants, he'll never overpower Ben. Hyena tries to intrude and save/stroke Sniper's ego, but Smith just chases him away, offering him a hearty whooping for his treason. Distracted by the injustice taking place, nobody notices as a bleeding Jaguar limps off.

Sniper, flustered with his failure to assassinate the canine equivalent of a 19 year old, throws himself headlong into Gin, ready to rip him to pieces. He's Too Slow, though, and Gin leaps into a nearby tree out of his reach.

A look of fear flashes in Sniper's eyes. He's not afraid of Gin killing him, but instead of his physical prowess. The Boss is also capable of vertical leaping and other anime asspulls. This convinces Sniper once and for all that Gin truly is the Boss's kid. Aight! All the more reason to kill the kid.

"Do you know why they call me Sniper?" he calls up as Gin readies to leap down. "Snipers are known for their accuracy. They never miss." Gin lunges down at the Doberman. Sniper bares his razor sharp fangs. "I never miss."

Gin realizes he's about to be assblasted by the general's teef, so he does a barrel roll in midair fast enough to dodge Sniper's fangs but not his force. He's sent backwards, colliding with a tree and having the wind knocked out of him.

As he struggles to get up, Sniper looms over him and steps on his head. Mr. S begins sadistically cooing at the young dog, promising him he'll bury Gin and Ben alongside each other when they're both dead.

But there's several episodes left for me to write, so of course Smith comes back and boots Sniper out of the way just in time to save Gin's life. A bloodied, battered Hyena follows behind Smith, but he's useless to help his boss now. Smith grabs Gin, flings him onto his back, and, with great effort, runs away. Sniper and his now worthless henchman give chase, hollering about how the two should've been more obedient to their superior. The Spaniel just bails, desperate to get away.

Perhaps too desperate, because he's unable to stop when he realizes he's run into the edge of a cliff. He screams as he and a barely lucid Gin fly over the edge, both of them dropping into the stream below. Sniper and Hyena watch wordlessly as the soldiers disappear from sight.

As the dogs duke it out, Daisuke is still cowering and John is still bear wrastling. Problem is that John overestimated himself. Without an armed human at his back, bears are like twice as hard to kill now. The shepherd tries his best to keep pace with the bear, but he's getting more and more tired by the second. He quickly begins to realize he can't save Daisuke despite his promise to Gin. His eyes sting with tears of desperation.

Just before the bear is about to abandon the puny pooch and start chomping on the child, an ominous howl is heard.

The dog, the bear, and that kid over there gaze up as a muscular, heavily scarred dog leaps to Daisuke's side. Daisuke takes one look at the dog and faints dead away, overwhelmed by all the shit that's happening.

The dog is Riki, better known to John as The Boss, and his ferocious growl and rippling dog pecs alone are enough to drive the bear out of sight. As the bear stomps off to gossip about this event, The Boss Dog turns to John.

The leader's voice drops to a mellow, low tone, and he asks why John's back here instead of with the other soldiers. If he recalls correctly, John was going to follow Ben on his cross-country trip. John snorts disdainfully and says neither Ben nor Muscles McGee here are his leader. Nobody leads someone as hardcore as John.

The Akita Killyou nods thoughtfully, irritating the edgelord before him, before asking what John plans to do now. In a moment of foolish boldness, John spits that he's going to lead the boss's pack now. The battle-worn bitchboy better ready himself, because John's about to steal his position... by force.

Elsewhere in a stream, two other dogs are doing their best to survive. Smith struggles to keep himself afloat with Gin on his back, but he's growing weak. The Spaniel inevitably succumbs to his exhaustion and begins sinking.

As the water floods his faceholes, Gin regains consciousness with a snort. He treads water for a sec and realizes his friend is underwater beneath him. "Smith!" Gin exclaims before diving in. He returns the life saving favor to Smith by yoinking him up by his collar so that his head is just above the water.

After he catches his breath, Smith confides in Gin that maybe dropping 20 feet into a raging river wasn't such a good idea. He feels battered enough that he thinks he's broken something. He urges Gin to let him go, but Gin stubbornly shakes his head no. Smith's eyes widen as a rumbling sound fills his ears. He looks further down the river and sees a wave of foam flowing over a cliff's edge. This stream leads to a waterfall!

Smith demands Gin let go and save himself, but given he's the hero of this story, Gin adamantly refuses, instead clinging to his friend. As the two reach the fall's edge, Gin turns Smith to face upward, shielding him with his body as they fall into the lake below.

Meanwhile, Riki and John stand off in earnest. The Ohu leader has agreed to battle John for rank, and he doesn't seem the least bit concerned about defending his title. This is likely because all it takes to down ole Johnny boy is a single, well-placed smack with the fangs.

As John collapses, the leader stands over him, offering to help him up onto his paws. John refuses to meet the other dog's gaze, but the boss just smiles. He tells John that he'll be keeping his position as leader, but that John is always invited to join his ranks. He'd be honored to have such a powerful spirit fighting alongside him.

John's ego is more then a little hurt, so he just snarls that what the boss and his soldiers are doing is stupid. A ragtag group of mutts cannot bring down a monster the likes of Akakabuto, and he's never going to change his mind about that.

The boss nods, but he must respectfully disagree. His power is hard to overstate - hell, he can scare bears off with a funny look. And yet he knows he couldn't kill Akakabuto alone even if he tried. He says that there's strength in numbers not when a bunch of directionless cowards join forces, but when those who are strong as individuals work together.

John's forehead crinkles before the boss offers him a bow and runs back into the woods. John is left panting beside Daisuke, who he then begins dragging back to the village.

Dusk comes and goes, bringing nighttime with it. The platoons have been waiting for the return of their soldiers, but it's been taking an awful long time for them to return. They'll never meet Moss at this rate. Chutora suggests that Hyena, Smith, and Gin have all died, to which Cross responds by cuffing him upside the head.

The two are about to squabble when Ben tells everyone to knock that shit off, he can smell blood. Everyone is suddenly alert as a stranger with a gash in his shoulder stumbles into view, collapsing not 20 feet from the pack. Everyone rushes to help him as he falls over. He meets Ben's gaze and manages to utter "Are you Ben..?" before losing consciousness.

"Oh shit," panics Akatora, "It's Moss's kid!" Everyone is taken aback. Great asks Ben if he believes Gin and Smith had attacked this guy without permission, but Ben doesn't think so. It wouldn't be like either of them to do something so rash. Akatora insists that all brindles regardless of breed will fight to the death at a moment's notice, really showing his internalized brindlephobia.

Kurotora worriedly wonders aloud if Moss has killed Gin and Smith in retribution. It would explain why they never came back. Cross tries to slow everyone's roll so they stop coming to conclusions while Ben directs the dogs to finally get in line. Whatever's happening, they need to get to the bottom of it, and they'll only do that by meeting Moss. They leave Great behind to keep an eye on Jaguar as they peel off with new purpose.

Somewhere else in the Kasumi Dake river valley, Smith awakens on the shore of the lake covered head to toe in mud. As his eyes adjust to the darkness, he realizes that Gin is sitting in front of him. He also looks like he had a deep cleanse day at the spa. Gin is overjoyed to see Smith has woken up. He says that he was worried Smith had died, to which Smith playfully tugs at his ear and assures him it'll take more then some water to do Commander Smith in.

But they can't keep horseassing around. Ben and the pack are in danger if they don't clear up this situation ayy ess ayy pee. The two scamper off to find, well, everyone.

As all this is happening, Moss and his gang have found Lloyd's body, and Moss is, to put it delicately, super fucking pissed. He's appalled at the death of his comrade and sick with worry for his son. The others try to soothe him by saying they haven't found Jaguar's body, suggesting he could still be alive, but Moss is too livid at the idea of his sweet baby boy being dead to care.

Remembering what Hyena had told him, Moss swears death on every single soldier following that bastard Ben. He tells his men to prepare for war as he shakes with rage.

The aforementioned Ben and his soldiers are continuing along when Akatora suddenly tells everyone to hol' up. The Kai Ken has just become aware of a kind of smelly smell, a smelly smell that smells... smelly. Ben's all like "Nani the fuck" when suddenly some bassy-ass voice starts screaming obscenities at them.

Up atop his glorious rocky throne stands Kasumi Dake's most beloved mobster. The dogs are in awe of just how fuckin' CHUNK Moss is as his own packmates surround him.

Moss presumes correctly that the dane at the front of the pack is Ben, and he demands to know what he's done with his son. Cross boldly screams back, demanding to know where their missing soldiers are. Moss doesn't give a response, not even the classic I Asked You First, because he's too busy shoving boulders down from his rocky recliner.

All it takes is a few hard shoves to cause a veritable rockslide, unleashing a torrent of boulders onto the Ohu dogs. Ben hollers for everyone to get out of the way, and nobody needs to be told twice.

The slower and less fortunate of the dogs are crushed like barking insects as the larger boulders collide with them. As he scurries away, Ben notices Cross about to become one of these smushed pups as she's too busy shoving others out of harm's way to notice the rocks tumbling towards her. Desperate, Ben throws himself against her with all his might, knocking her clear out of the path of destruction seconds before he himself is pummeled.

Cross and the other survivors collect their bearings before looking back on the destruction. Cross shrieks in horror at the sight she's met with: a bleeding Ben, his eyes shut and his tongue lolling from his mouth, can be seen lying in the jumbled mess of rock. She cries guiltily out to her beloved as the Kai Bros hold her back.

It's too late for the big man. Angry tears flow from her scrunched up face as Cross's wails turn into growls. That fatass on the hill WILL pay for this.

Back at base camp, Jaguar has regained consciousness, and he's having a pleasant chat with Great about how some little grey shrimp and his bossy German friend have been setting up both his dad and the Ohu dogs to fight an unnecessary war. Great is only a little surprised that the obviously evil Sniper would pull this kinda shit, but he thanks Jaguar for the info anyway.

Feeling better after being able to rest, Jaguar rises to his feet and insists the two hurry to his dad's domain. He'd feel awfully guilty if anyone were killed over this misunderstanding.

Jaguar'd better get ready to get guilted because a handful of soldiers have indeed been killtd. Several bodies can be seen poking out of holes between boulders, including the upper half of the dane in the red necklace. Given she was Ben's second in command, Cross prepares to lead the troops into battle in earnest. Moss is about to do the same, telling his men to kill everyone who wasn't crushed. The two armies of dogs collide, snapping and tearing into each other.

Cross and the Kai Bros lead the charge, though, strangely enough, Moss isn't at the forefront of his own army. Instead he's following behind them, urging them on. Cross sees red at the sight of her man's murderer and lunges at him, chomping down as hard as she can into his shoulder.

Cross is no weakling, but Moss is covered in so much visceral fat and muscle that her teeth don't even draw blood. Moss coughs out a smoker's laugh as he flips onto his side, smushing the Saluki and knocking the wind out of her. The Kai Bros call out to their new commander as Moss grabs her by the throat.

Watching from a hilltop nearby, Sniper grins cruelly at the bloodbath before him. He laughs in a most edgy way as Hyena licks his own wounds beside him, quite a bit less amused at the sight of a buncha people who trusted him getting murked.

Sniper notices Hyena's not feelin' the deadly vibe and tells him in a slippery voice that he should be happy. When Sniper's the new leader of the platoon, then the Ohu army, Hyena will be his right hand dog. Hyena forces a giggle, but truth be told starting a war between two innocent parties feels suckier then he expected it would.

The battle rages on. The Kai Bros desperately call out to Cross, but she's unable to escape Moss's gargantuan, flappy jowls. He begins to shake her like a ragdoll and she snarls in desperation and fright. All hope seems lost until the bark of a young, overpowered dog echos across the valley. The Ohu soldiers look up despite the onslaught tearing into them.

A shooting star crosses the night sky, and at the end of its trail a silver brindle akita leaps into view. Gin flings himself into the scruff of Moss's neck. Smith is following close behind, and he canonballs onto the dog that's got hold of Akatora's leg. Smith hollers for everyone to stop, they've been set up!

The Kasumi Dake pack gives pause, but Moss doesn't. He releases Cross and flings Gin off of him, snarling at the insolent kiddo. Gin tells Moss to cool it, his son Jaguar is still alive.

Gin has Moss's undivided, if disbelieving, attention now. Gin goes on to explain that it wasn't he and Smith who attacked Jaguar and Lloyd, it was this shitty dude and his henchman who the Ohu dogs had once believed to be a friend. Smith backs up Gin's account while Gin looks around wildly to find Ben and make sure he's also aware of what's gone down.

Upon realizing what Gin is doing, Cross gives a cough and hobbles over to him. She has tears in her eyes, and she's unable to articulate what she needs to say.

Gin is about to ask her what's wrong when he sees something out the corner of his eye, something red that stands out against the greys of the rocks. The  red, round thing catches a sliver of moonlight. Gin gasps as he realizes what - who - it is.

It's Ben, dried blood smattering his unmoving face, the rock that downed him lying on top of his chest. Gin joins in Cross's desperate weeping. He hadn't know Ben for long, but the mountain of dog and his unceasing patience had made an impact on the kid.

Sorrow turns to rage as Gin sets his sights on vengeance. He turns to the silent crowd, demanding to know who the fuck killed his Army Dad. Moss, totally uninterested in Gin's grief, demands back for Gin to explain where his son is. Gin makes it abundantly clear that his empathy is finite as he lunges towards Moss, catching him by the waddle-like roll of skin under his chin. "I'll kill you!" the Akita screams. "I'll fucking kill you!"

Moss only responds with a laugh that rumbles through his body. He's about to mention how very kawaii it is of Gin to attack him when he suddenly finds himself flipping over. "Huh?" he manages to gasp as Gin turns the old clown upside down. Moss is so heavy that he ground around him shakes when he strikes it, and his mobsters look on in awe.

Moss laughs once more, admittedly impressed, before deciding he's done playing games. He kicks Gin's comparatively small body off of him and sends the young soldier crashing into the side of the boulder that smushed Ben.

Gin wheezes a cough as he glances over Ben's lifeless face. Gin's eyes glaze over with tears once more as he turns to Moss, promising the fat bastard that he'll kill him before the sun rises. Moss accepts the challenge, telling Gin to say that to his face not online see what happens. The two run at each other for like 2 seconds before they hear a familiar voice calling out for its father.

Great and Jaguar have successfully located the gang war. Moss immediately loses all interest in Gin, overjoyed to see his son truly is alive and well. Jaguar's shoulder is caked in thick, black shards of dry blood, but he's otherwise doing okay.

As Moss runs over to embrace his son, Jaguar mimics 2009 internet culture by confirming this whole thing was indeed a trap.  And moreover that Akita kid and his friend saved Jag's life after Lloyd was killed.

Moss thanks his kid for the plot summary of the day, but he's not sure that'll end the war now. Grateful though he is for Gin's service, Moss knows that the youngin won't stop til he's avenged Ben.

Gin and Moss are about to face off again when everyone hears a weak, breathless voice. The voice tells everyone to stop, and its request is punctuated with the scraping of rock against rock. Everyone looks to the rockslide as one of the boulders shifts upwards.

The shadow underneath the rock slowly begins to rise, revealing a broad four-legged muscleman with a bloody face and a necklace of red beads. It's Ben! Looking rough but definitely alive, he rolls the boulder off of himself with a growl.

As his friends run over to him the big lug reveals his sense of humor hasn't been crushed to death either by telling Gin all his carrying on had made it impossible for him to sleep.

The Kai Bros tackle their commander as Cross cleans his face of blood. Gin admiringly gazes with tearful eyes up at Ben, and Ben smiles warmly back at him. Moss's mafioso are touched by the scene. Even Moss is a little overwhelmed by Ben's machismo.

As his companions calm down, Ben takes a step towards Moss. The dane doesn't want to be rivals. He sees all dogs as equals. His only enemy is that dickheaded bear back home. Ben bows and makes his intentions clear: he's humbly asking for Moss's assistance. Jaguar backs him up, detailing what Great told him about the Ohu army's noble cause to pummel Akakabitchboy into a much-deserved early grave.

Moss thinks this is a neat idea and all, but if he's going to be falling in line behind a buncha army boys, he's gotta make sure their leader is up to snuff even when injured. He tells Ben he'll join him if, even in this condition, he can kick Moss's ass.

Moss barrels towards Ben, and Ben makes good by doing what Moss asked. He kicks the Mastiff's ass by grabbing his neck and slamming his head into a rock. The Big Boy tumbles away, shaken by the impact.

Just as his men are about to run to his defense, he lets loose another one of his rumbly, gravely laughs. He's seen all he needs to see. Moss lifts himself up and promises Zombie Dog he and his pack's loyalty. After all, Moss is getting to be an old man. Instead of wasting his winter years lazing on rocks and farting himself awake, he'd rather die fighting for something that matters.

"We're not going there to die, Moss," Ben says to the old coot. "We're going there to fight so that we may keep living." As the verbal contract is sealed, both packs form one. The dogs celebrate their new allegiance with a chorus of howls. Gin joins the howling, forgetting about his aches and pains from a long day of getting the shit kicked out of him. As he looks to the shimmering moon above, his rich brown eyes seem to fill with stars.

Unamused by the poetry of the scene, Sniper is still watching Dogfight TV from atop the hill, except now he's pissed. Sniper isn't a decent enough person to understand how two enemies can become friends, and he's shaking with fury to see his lbr pretty simplistic plan crap out on him.

Hyena's less angry then he is ridden with anxiety. Since the Ohu dogs are still alive and have recruited new friends who hate both him and Sniper with a passion, he's expecting retribution for the whole war instigation thing. Sniper doesn't speak. He's too busy glaring at Ben, Moss, and the little silver thorn in his side to think of anything but vengeance.

Sniper throws his paws up in the air and decides he needs to disappear til the heat is off of him. As Hyena tries politely and submissively to explain that Sniper will literally never be free of the sins committed here today, Sniper snaps at him.

Hyena rolls onto his back as Sniper commands his underling to continue the ruse and rejoin the pack. Hyena wants to argue, but he wants to live as well, so he keeps his whimpering mouth shut as Sniper plods away. As soon as his silly little stub tail is out of sight, Hyena groans in worry. "Here we go again," he says to a laugh track.

After a few more minutes of screaming at the sky, the dogarmy takes off. The platoon is at least twice as large now, powerful enough to curbstomp most non-bear foes in their way. And so the group fearlessly continues their road trip, running day and night over a 48 hour period. Destination: Iga of the Mie prefecture. Goal: recruit some dogs with uber special skills. Hotel: Trivago.

The dogs quickly reach Mie. Ben mysteriously mentions a particular dog from his past being here, and everyone's automatically like YEAH ITS ASS KICKING TIME. Except hold up, Ben says this isn't the type of guy they wanna fight into submission, but rather speak with. This piques the pack's curiosity, but Ben is too busy reliving memories of past exploits to share. Instead, the Kai Bros decide they've got rumblies in their tumblies, and so it's time to kill some shit.

The three run off to beat a boar onto a metaphorical plate. They're joined by Papa Moss, a guy as big and powerful as any wild boar. The pack applauds the efforts of the deadly dwarves and generous giant as they settle in to devour the fallen piggie.

While everyone stuffs themselves silly, Cross nuzzles Ben's neck and tells him she's glad he didn't actually get curbstomped by a rock. Ben licks her head and agrees that being alive is pretty sweet. That said, if ever the platoon needed a new leader, he trusts that she'd be able to fill his shoes. She'd rather not think about it, so instead she curls up beside Ben and rests her head on his back as he enjoys his share of pork.

Just out of both sight and smell, a pair of eyes watch from the shadows as the Ohu dogs have their fill. The eyes swiftly glide across the way to notice another, much more pitiful pair of eyes focused on the same sight.

The pathetic eyes, the lids around them sagging in self-pity, belong to one anxious, hungry Hyena. He murmurs to himself that life is so unfair, wishing for all the world that he could play some Linkin Park right now.

The stranger in the bushes watches Hyena pout, though they're unable to hear him sniveling to himself about how he'll never find a way back into the ranks. They also watch as a slab of meat falls from the tree directly above Hyena, and their eyes widen. So do Hyena's, but for a different reason. He looks up at the meat's mysterious origin and sees a very strange dog on the branch above him.

The dog is of average size with a muscular build. Her coat is brown with a pale tan underbelly, and atop her scarred head is a fluttery lock of hair reminiscent of a mohawk. In a hollow, airy voice she tells Hyena that the meat is a gift for him.

Hyena spends a single moment thinking WTF The Fuck before the meat seduces him with its juicy goodness. Having had nothing to eat for like three days, Hyena makes like he hasn't eaten in three years and snags it up greedily. It smells weird, but he's too hungry to care.

As he takes his first bite, the Bizarre Tree-Dog leaps from her branch to another. She rapidly takes off and out of view by playing hopscotch in the trees. This gives Hyena a spook, so he snags the meat up and tries to scramble off before realizing that the strange dog is coming back.

This time she's not alone. She and two other dogs of the same unidentifiable breed leap down from the trees and into circle formation around Hyena. Hyena the Cowardly Dog practically pees his no-pants as they inch towards him.

While this is happening the Ohu dogs are allowing themselves to kick back for a moment. Ben figures his mysterious new ally is close, so giving everyone a second to rest ain't a bad idea.

Gin is too excited by the new sights and smells to rest, though, so instead he pokes around curiously. He hears a rustle in the bushes as if something is sneaking away, but he can't see anything. Instead, he hears a new sound just a moment later. It sounds like someone screaming, and that someone sounds like someone he's met - and disliked - before...

Hyena continues trying not to evacuate his bladder as the strange dog approaches him in earnest. She glares at him and asks if the dogs pigging out on pig over yonder are his bros. Hyena says they are, and that they'll kick the ass of anyone who dares fuck with him.

The stranger has to keep from rolling her eyes at the obvious lie as she commands Hyena to tell them this: Maya ("demon arrow") of the Koga Clan is telling them to leave this forest at once. Should they not heed this warning, the pack will face the wrath of the malevolent Koga leader.

The Kogas each do a boss-ass vertical leap into the trees. They're off again, rushing through the leaves as quick as physics will permit. As they go, Hyena finally legit pees himself and just about faints, never having been more afraid of a reminder that trespassing is impolite.

He curls into a shuddering, urine-soaked ball. This is without a doubt one of the worst days of his life. And it's about to get even worse because a dog he's never seen before has emerged silently from the bushes.

The dog isn't one of the Kogas, but instead a red, brown, and white Rough Collie. The animal has a handsome face and a rehearsed-looking gait, walking as if he's trying to impress someone. The Collie stands over Hyena while Yeenee hides his face and his literal pound of flesh. "Who are you?" is all the Collie gets out before both he and his find notice something coming towards them.

It's the Ohu pack, and they're less then happy to see Hyena has returned. Jaguar is especially pissed that the little war criminal dares to show his face again, and he's ready to smack the weenie's head in when Akatora tells him to back off. Nobody is gonna kill diddly shit without Ben giving the a-okay. That said, who is this weirdo standing beside Hyena? Did he bring the little bugger back?

Cross closes the distance between herself and The New Guy (2002) and asks where he's come from while Ben approaches Hyena. It doesn't take a dog the size of a small horse much to look intimidating, but Ben's never looked scarier then when he shows his disapproval of his former comrade.

Hyena insists that he has no clue where Sniper is now, and that he only did what he'd been told him because Sniper had threatened to kill him if he didn't. Moss tells the shivering whelp that he doesn't believe him and that it wouldn't matter if that was true anyway. Hyena was an accomplice to the murder of one of his men and the attempted murder of his only son. The little bastard can never be an Ohu soldier given what he's done.

Alongside all this in a conversation you'd expect to be had over tea instead of the future corpse of a criminal, Cross and Gin politely grill the Collie.

The fancypants's name is Wilson, and he's an old circus performer who's traveled the world. His speech is eloquent, his demeanor is goodnatured, and the dude is clearly ripped under his piles of fur, all of which convinces Gin that he'd make a fine soldier. Gin asks Cross if Wilson can join them, but she's not too sure. She asks why a performing dog is out in the middle of nowhere.

Wilson sighs and looks drearily at Gin, seemingly deep in thought. He had escaped the circus several years ago, he explains. Back then, he'd had a wife named Lean and a son named Londo. His boy was about Gin's age when he was murdered by someone Wilson refers to as The Devil Dog, a cannibalistic cultist monster who Will's owner had tried to train to be a circus dog as well.

The man had been impressed by the dog's unique appearance and flexibility, but the mongrel hadn't liked being bossed around. He mauled the ringleader, killed AND ATE Wilson's family, and escaped back to his followers in the woods. These woods.

Cross seems especially shaken by this retelling of family slaughter while Gin offers his condolences. Wilson kindly accepts Gin's pity, but he insists he doesn't need it. He plans on getting his revenge soon enough, both against The Devil Dog and another unmentioned foe of his. Gin's about to ask what other sinister being has added a hefty dose of trauma to Wilson's backstory when Hyena, weeping like a baby, comes crawling across the dirt to cling to Cross's ankle.

Cross snaps out of her empathetic stupor as Hyena begs her to convince Ben that he's deserving of forgiveness. She reacts as one would to stepping on a piece of gum and pulls her paw away, her face crinkling in disgust.

Even more desperate now, Hyena turns to Gin. Gin's reaction is more volatile then Cross's - he starts growling at Hyena as if ready to attack - so Hyena gives up on finding allies before he has a chance to beg Wilson for backup. Ben pads up to him as the grey dog trembles pitifully.

"Hyena," Ben says, his voice almost unrecognizable with hatred, "you are no longer my subordinate."

Everyone is pretty sure this is Ben's final statement before he whips out his katana and teleports behind Hyena, but he has yet to move. Ben's suddenly bombarded from all sides with suggestions. Jaguar wants to kill Hyena! No, Moss does! No, The Kai Bros do! No, Cross says Ben shouldn't do it! Great agrees, Ben's too good to kill a worm like Hyena!

A loud "Be quiet" is all it takes to silence the platoons' wild jabbering, and Ben is left standing in silence over the deserter.

A moment later and without warning, Ben snaps into action and at Hyena's neck, grabbing hold of him in his powerful jowls. Gin finds himself taken aback. Hyena's shitty, it's true, but Gin's never seen Ben looking so much like a cold, hard killer. Ben's not really gonna splatter Hyena's gutless guts all over the place, is he?

Nah. The dane instead tosses the Weimeranar into a tree, knocking a tooth or two loose and probably causing a few fractures on impact. Hyena wails about the pain he's in while Ben advances on him. Hyena's pleas fall on deaf ears as Ben snarls at him. Hyena is allowed to live... for now. But under one condition: either he brings Sniper back to the platoon to pay for his crimes, or Ben will use his particular set of skills to find and kill both the mastermind and his henchman.

Moss and Jaguar are a little pissed that their would-be life-ruiner isn't rotting in the dirt, but Ben calmly asks them to grin and bear it. It's better to take out an evil and banish his lackey then kill the lackey and lose track of the evil, yeah? The Mastiffs agree, if a bit begrudgingly.

Gin sighs in relief. Ben puts up a tough front when need be, but he wouldn't really kill Hyena. It'd be like kicking a puppy, only somehow less literally.

Before Hyena leaves, he realizes Smith is chewing on his chunk of meat. He whines about starving, so Smith taunts him over how they let him live and yet he's still unsatisfied. Gin's a little too shaken for joking around so he tells Smith to give the dweeb back his Lunchables.

Smith giggles his frat boy giggle and tosses the meat back to Hyena. Sniper's starving steward has gone back to eating when suddenly a dark shadow falls over Wilson's face.

Wilson wastes no time in leaping over the dogs in his way to reach Hyena. He demands that Hyena spit it out, what do you have in your mouth, bad dog, spit it out, drop it, spit it out I said. Just like my dog does whenever I catch him chewing something he shouldn't, Hyena tries to swallow his bounty before someone else can get his icky spit on it.

Hyena is a baka, Wilson says, because that's no regular meat. It's the flesh of another dog.

"GASP" gasps everybody in horror. Even though he only chewed the dog flesh for a second, Smith starts puking up the pork in his stomach. Hyena turns a deep shade of green and looks like he's about to follow suit. A shaken Gin tells Wilson not to joke around, but he knows the Collie isn't lying. Akatora turns accusingly towards a now puking Hyena.

The Weimaraner tries desperately to explain his innocence between mouthfuls of stomach acid. He says in a panic that he didn't know he was cannibalizing - the meat was given to him! Ben starts to regret letting Hyena live as he demands to know who would've gifted some rando a hunk of Roasted Rover when Wilson begins snarling towards the treetops. "It was them," he growls, his eyes burning with hatred. Everyone looks up.

It's the strange dogs from before, the ones with the fauxhawks. Maya gazes down at the confused canines. Then she and her compadres disappear up into the leaves. Determined to get to the bottom of this, Gin superjumps after them, discovering they've swooced just out of view. This catches the dogs off guard, and they begin leaping from branch to branch to get away. Gin's experience in neighborhood parkour comes in handy and allows him to effortlessly keep pace with them.

The rest of the pack follows on foot, trying to keep pace with the flying squirrels/dogs above. Gin's convinced he's almost caught up to the cannibalistic coterie when one of their unseen comrades leaps down on him from above. The dog rabbit kicks Gin in the middle of his back, effectively knocking him from the air and into the dirt. The pack doubles back to make sure Gin hasn't acquired any especially nasty booboos. Gin's alright, but now the squirrel dogs are gone. 

As everyone begins discussing what to do next, Ben verbalizes his internal monologue for the audience's sake. Those dogs were 100% ninjas, or at least trained in the art of ninja-ing, which means they must be part of his target's pack. Wilson asks who Ben's looking for, to which Ben replies he came here to find Iga's Akame ("red eye").

Great interjects and, as kindly as one can, accuses Ben of pursuing a cannibal in the hopes of making him a soldier, but Ben assures everyone he wouldn't be looking to add dog-chompers to their ranks. Either Akame's changed since Ben last met him or something weird is going on.

Gin tries to imagine what this Akame could be like. He'd earned Ben's trust somehow, but if his namesake and this recent experience are to be considered, maybe Akame is a red-eyed tyrant who eats other dogs. Gin imagines a bestial dog with a mohawk and two bloodshot eyes leaping from the trees and descending on other dogs, eating them alive.

But there's no time to keep spooking himself because Ben has instructed everyone to get moving. It's time to figure out what the hell is going on.

The pack continues their trek. Instead of shinobi dogs, though, they mostly just find a buncha trees and rocks. Some soldiers are becoming so impatient they're wondering if it's time to interrogate the surrounding foliage when Gin picks up a weird scent. The smell is unpleasant, metallic, and strangely organic. He pursues the smell to find...

The bloodied corpse of a Kishu Inu being chomped on by the ninja dogs AAAAAAAAAA!!! Beside himself with disgust, Gin accidentally gasps a bit too dramatically, and the cannibals turn to face him. Gin snarls and dives towards them. As Ben and Cross come to see what the commotion's about, they see Gin has already launched into a lecture about how these are some very, very bad doggies. Shame on them! Naughty naughty!

"Fuck off, kid," is all one of the Kogas manages to say before the rest of the packup comes in as backup. Wilson meets eyes with of one of the Kogas, his gaze filled with hate. The shinobi smirks, well aware of who Wilson is. As this staring contest takes place, Ben asks the ninja dogs to tell him if they know Akame.

The smug asshole gazing at Wilson thinks fast, saying, "Sure we do. He's our leader. He overthrew Master Kurojaki ("black devil") a while back. We're just following his orders. Ain't that right, guys?"

The Koga looks back over his shoulder at his crew and gives them a slippery smile. The dogs rub their two braincells together long enough to realize what he's doing and they grin back, nodding. They punctuate their unreliable narration by telling the soldiers to leave before bounding away into the trees.

Gin is about to follow them when Ben croaks out that there's no point. Gin follows orders and joins the others in looking to Ben for guidance.

Ben is looking mournfully down at the broken white body before them. The dog is indeed dead. He's covered with bite marks, his innards poking through deep gashes, his fur stained with thick patches of blood. Ben remarks that he's ashamed of having brought everyone here to ask for a cannibal's help, but they must stop this treachery before they can continue their mission. Likewise, they should do a body good and bury the poor sucker. It's the least they can do to make up for the tragedy.

Smith and the Kai Bros begin to drag the dog away so as to lay him to a more dignified rest. As they do, another much more alive white dog watches from the trees above.

He looks very much like the other dog, likely because he is also a Kishu Inu. He gives pause as he sees the Ohu soldiers drag the other whitey away. He mutters to himself about how he's never seen these guys before and that it's probably safe to assume that anyone holding a dead guy is evil. Could they be working with the cultists? The dog's not sure, but he hurries off regardless.

Deeper in the forest, a monument to a forgotten era, a dilapidated human house, stands tall. It's the Kishu's destination, and he leaps to it swiftly. He calls out to his Chief from outside the long abandoned building. "Kirikaze?" a measured voice greets him. "Come in."

Kirikaze ("misty wind") bounds in and immediately begins detailing what he's seen: there's a buncha new kids on the block, a whole assload of them, and after he saw Goody Proctor dancing with the devil, he saw said pack with their doglips fastened around the legs of a fallen comrade. He suggests that the pack may have killed the poor little white guy because they're in cahoots with the cult.

The measured voice calls down to Kirikaze from the rafters of the house. The dog it's attached to tells Kirikaze to gather the others, they've got a homestead to protect. If these n00bz truly are a threat then they must be eradicated. As he lays out his plan, the speaker turns his head into a sliver of sunlight. He's a magnificent white Kishu, paler then any of the others. He squints in the ray of light, his purplish-red eyes glistening thoughtfully.

Meanwhile, the fallen fair-furred friend has been buried in a shallow but otherwise decent grave. Ben bows his head over the distended dirt covering the dog and whispers a prayer. Gin, as if reading his mind, asks who Akame was and why Ben wanted to enlist him. Moss chimes in and says that he's not all for blindly following Ben into a cannibal's lair. Ben decides it's time to stop being so ~*~mysterious~*~ and comes clean with a flashback.

Back when Ben was still a hunting dog, the Kai Bros weren't the only dogs his owner nursed back to health. You see, Ben and his master were out playing Rooty Tooty Point-n-Shooty in the woods when they saw a white animal leaping from tree to tree.

Ben's master had thought the creature was a squirrel, so he'd shot at it and hit it. The man and his dane had approached it and found it to be not a squirrel but a Kishu Inu. The dog was a stark white, whiter then any other animal Ben had ever seen. The albinistic dog had been shot in the leg, and he'd looked at Ben as if pleading for sympathy.

Despite the dog clearly being feral, Ben's master took him home to heal him and raise him as a hunter. It's not every day you see a canine leaping through the trees, so the man was pretty determined to keep the albino no matter how much the dog snarled and hid in back of his prison, a tall, wire pen with a sturdy roof. It took a while for his leg to heal up, but within that time the dog - obviously named Akame - confided in Ben and became his friend.

Akame didn't like the idea of working for The Man (either the individual or the sociopolitical concept), and he especially didn't like the idea of being a house pet while his pack languished in the woods. Without his guidance the other Kishu ninjas would be at a loss for what to do.

Ben was hard pressed to believe this random guy was a ninja solely because he could jump super good, but when Akame stated that his wife had had a litter before he'd left and he'd never gotten to see his children, Ben's heart melted like the cheeseball it is. 

Ben had looked deep into the pleading dog's pigmentless, pinkish eyes and decided he wasn't going to orphan any of his puppies. He broke Akame out and escorted him back to the forest. That had been several years ago, and now, if the cannibals were to be believed, Akame was leading a band of murderers.

Ben gives a weak chuckle and wonders aloud if the mohawk dudes were Akame's sons and daughters. Cross looks like she's about to soothe him when Moss interjects that it's cool, man, everyone makes mistakes. It's not Ben's fault his good nature was taken advantage of, not so long as he's willing to put an end to this volatile tomfoolery.

Ben nods, his determination returning to him, and he and the others get back to their favorite activity: running towards an undefined location. But holy canolli, what's this? A gust of wind blows past the pack's noses, sending the eternally intimidating scent of strangers whooshing through their sinuses.

Everyone looks around but they're unable to see where the smell is coming from. All except protagonist Gin, obviously, who is the first to look up. He makes a weird noise in the back of his throat, alerting everyone else to look too.

A barrage of Kishu Inus jump down on top of them, each hollering curses and victorious announcements of triumph over evil or some shit. One of the Kishus screams about Kogas, only confusing everyone further. One of the dogs announces the ninjas' attack move like this is some kinda anime. "Raikaken!" ("thunder blossom blade") she shouts as the wave of white engulfs the army.

The white dogs dip in only once, tooth-smacking every face and ass they can reach. Then they all leap back into the branches before anyone has time to understand what just happened. Flustered, Gin jumps into the trees and calls after them to put up their dukes. Ben instructs everyone else to follow on foot again and the chase begins. Gin calls down to the soldiers periodically to make sure they're following behind.

Watching from a short distance away is an excited mass of Koga dogs. Maya has lead them there to enjoy the show, and she's brought her hubby with her.

The man himself is a unique specimen indeed: the Koga leader is a touch taller then his comrades. He's got a torn left ear and a dark coat of brindle merle. Just between his front paws sits a toddler-age puppy who is clearly his own, the child bearing the same unique markings. The Koga leader grins in amusement, pleased that his cult can kick back and watch as innocents fight their battle for them.

Meanwhile, despite his efforts, Gin is falling behind the Igas. They manage to hurry out of his range of sight and smell, and so he comes to a frustrated stop. As his sides heave with exertion he calls down to Ben that he's lost the lil buggers. Gin leaps down to rejoin the group and explains that he doesn't know what happened, dude, they just up and disappeared.

Smith's face crunches up stoically. He announces that he's not willing to let this go so anticlimactically before he begins sniffing around. The others watch as he takes major nose-hits from the ground and then pauses. He points instinctively at a patch of dirt for a moment before remembering himself and setting to digging. Within moments he manages to unearth something peculiar: one of the Kishus!

The white dude's head is the only part of him exposed, and he's unmoving. "Is he dead?" someone asks. There's a small wave of shrugs. The group quickly assumes the corpse was buried by the cannibals to serve as a midnight snack and they begin to walk away.

Gin follows behind, but he notices Smith hasn't left the presumed cadaver's side. Smith murmurs something about the holedog not smelling dead when one of the "corpse's" eyes opens! The dog snarls viciously and grabs Smith by the collar. As Smith screams and the soldiers double back, the Spaniel is yoinked into the hole and out of sight.

Gin reaches the hole first and notices that it's not just a hole. It's a tunnel, and both the Kishu and Smith have disappeared into it. He tries to leap in and follow, but Ben pulls him out of it by his curly-cue tail.

Gin's insolent about the ass portion of his spine being used as a handle when there's a comrade who needs saving, but Ben says it'd be too risky to follow after them. They're fuckin' NINJAS, my guy, this is clearly a trick they've set up for intruders.

Cross wonders aloud where the tunnel may lead and Ben surveys the area. It takes him all of 3 seconds to realize that oh my goodness there's a house like 50 feet away.

Ben is instantly certain that the ninja bastards live there given no human came out screaming about the massive pack of feral dogs. No doubt the tunnel leads to that building, and that to get to the bottom of this mess the pack will have to go there. They'll have to surround the building's perimeter and then launch an attack.

That said, Ben's a little wary of leaving the tunnel unguarded. Given he previously had his opportunity to go spelunking taken from him, Gin jumps at the chance to explore some hole. Ben tells Gin that he's to WATCH the tunnel, not explore it, as he could be attacked by the ninjas.

Gin pouts as the other dogs go to surround the house, but he still chirps a "Good luck" to them as they take off. As soon as everyone else is gone, Gin gathers all his bravery (and insolence) and dives into the tunnel, still determined to find his friend.

Inside the dirt tube, Gin realizes the Kishus' squirrel-tier leaps are only matched by their gopher-tier digging abilities; the tunnel widens substantially, and it's impressively long. On the other side of it, the dog who 'napped Smith drags him out and under the house.

It doesn't take the dog more then a second and a whiff with his powerful schnoz to realize Gin, in all his smelly post-pubescent glory, is following him. He just shakes his head and makes a brief trek out to a scrape connected to the tunnel. The scrape dips into the lake beside the house, and with one swift motion the dog lifts the single wooden board separating the water from the dig-out.

The water goes roaring down the secret tunnel, which Gin can hear despite not knowing the context. Gin was just thinking that this was all too easy before looking up and reading the above paragraph. Just then, a torrent of water comes wooshing down towards him, flooding the tunnel and knocking him back with the force of a thousand spitting goldfish. He can only manage to cough out a swear before he's carried away.

The other soldiers have taken this time to organize themselves into a nifty little formation around the house, but they come to realize that nobody knows where the littlest recruit is. Cross tells Ben that when she went back to the tunnel to check on Gin he was nowhere to be seen.

Ben's certain the kid has gone down the hole against orders, but there's no time to be upset. Wilson says there's precious little time to save Smith. If Akame really is cannibal chief, he won't keep his men from their next meal for long. Despite his reinvigorated concern for his friend and fellow commander, Ben is wary of leaping into action too suddenly.

Inside the house, Smith is lying unconscious on the floor. Something that feels like another dog's paw (3 guesses as to what it is) touches his face. He slowly opens his eyes.

As the world comes back into focus, he lets out a high-pitched yelp. He's surrounded on all sides by stark white dogs, each one eyeing him harshly. One of them approaches him and he responds by screaming and running into a corner.

Smith starts wailing about how they shouldn't eat him because black and white dogs taste like ass and cause explosive diarrhea when another Kishu, one that was just out of sight, leaps from the rafters right down beside him.

Smith falls into a heap as the newer new guy looms over him. This guy is even paler then the rest; his fur is so pale it seems almost translucent at the edges. The other dogs are clearly annoyed at Smith's bellyaching but this guy just stares at him with expressionless red eyes.

"You're a Western breed, aren't you?" asks the super-white dog, finally breaking the silence. "I've never seen a dog like you before. What are you doing out here?"

Smith chokes out something about traveling to which the dog responds by asking why he and his friends are in this neck of the woods. Smith says that he and his buds are trying to recruit soldiers, which, judging by the super-white dog's reaction, was the wrong thing to say. The Kishu says that Smith's clearly with the Kogas. Smith barely knows how he got here, let alone where this conversation is taking them, so he tries to flee once more.

The neon white dog grabs him firmly by the scruff as he runs past, then slings him back into the corner. As Smith's noggin grows a goose-egg, one of the Kishus leans towards the super-white guy, their obvious leader, and informs him that she and the others are pretty sure that the "soldiers" are outside the manor, no doubt ready to overtake it at any moment.

Neon White tells his pack to ambush the dogs from out the tunnel while he interrogates the hostage. All but the leader depart, leaving a confounded Smith looking on.

The dogs do indeed travel through the flooded tunnel. The gaping Earth-hole is only tall enough to allow for a small air pocket above their heads, so they're mostly submerged. While passing through their underwater subway system, the dogs see the floating, motionless body of a young brindle Akita. Several of their faces crumple at the sight, probably thinking about how war is hell and stuff, before they leave the body behind.

But hey, I'll let you in on a secret: ITS GIN AND HE ISNT DEAD WHODA THUNK. He's just playing aquatic possum while taking tiny, secret gulps of air. He waits until the last of the dogs has swum past before grabbing onto the end of his tail.

The dog seems surprised and he makes like he wants to turn around and face Gin, but there's not enough space to turn back. Gin has hitched a ride out, but he'll no doubt have to contend with the bastards as soon as they leave the tunnel.

Meanwhile, the Ohu dogs have come to the conclusion that Gin and Smith are super, hella dead by now, or at the very least imprisoned, and this stake out has gone on long enough.

Given the commander’s absence, Ben assigns Cross to Smith's place. Then he starts directing everyone on how best to ransack the house. With a nod and an oddly poignant "GO!", the dawgies leap into action, all of them galloping at full speed towards the building.

The Kishus are well prepared for times like these. Several pits in the ground containing live warriors open beneath the approaching hoard's feet, ninjas leaping up from within to snag onto some unfortunate underbellies. Others leap down and out of the trees, cracking skulls with their powerful bites.

Lucky for the Ohu dogs these attacks only slow them down, not defeat them. Ben continues to lead the hoard until it's formed a ring-around-the-rosie of running troops around the house. 

But before the soldiers can literally come full circle, Ben yelps in pain and unromantically tumbles head over heels. One by one the other dogs succumb to the same fate, each stumbling blindly and then rolling over. A chorus of pained, confused whimpers rises up as Smith and the lead Kishu exit the house.

Smith calls out to his friends, but the super-white guy stops him, telling him not to take another step unless he too wants to be skewered.

Turns out the ground has been littered with Hishi seeds. Hishi plants are a water grass with distinctly sharp, spiky seeds, and the pack has managed to slice their paws on tons of them. Tens of little doggy footses bleed into the dirt as Smith watches helplessly.

Akatora says that a few seeds shouldn't be enough to down an army, but he feels... like ass. Like, totally sick, and not in a good way. The Kishu nods and explains that, btw, the spikes have been poisoned. A death by poisoning is a deserved one for a bunch of cannibal cultists (which is my band name now, don't steal).

Ben realizes who this dog is and pipes up. "Akame? Is that you? Have you gone mad?" The Kishu's reddish eyes widen in recognition. His eyes dart to the red bead collar around the dane's neck. "Ben?" he says while approaching the commander. "What are you doing here? Why are you helping the Kogas?"

Ben counters by asking why Akame's leading a hoard of cannibals and suddenly everyone understands that a particular plot element has been reused. The good guys have been double crossed once again!

Akame apologetically explains to everyone but the audience that the Igas thought the Ohu soldiers were allied with the Koga cult to aid in their evil plan. That plan being, of course, to slaughter the remaining Iga warriors and overtake their manor. Before he can truly grasp all of this, Ben's stomach starts benchpressing his other organs and he rolls over in pain.

Akame tells everyone not to move, else the poison will spread faster. He sees his own dogs are coming to see what the deal is and barks at them to bring the antidote. One of the dogs, soaking wet, trots up, looking especially annoyed.

Before they go to get the meds, the most annoyed dog swings his curly tail as an exhausted Gin finally lets it go. Gin sputters out water and the Ohu soldiers perk up at the sight of him. Unfortunately, all of them are getting gutpunched from the inside, so they don't have the strength to go meet him.

Ben saves Gin's silver ass by explaining that he's with them. The Igas seem confused that Gin's not a Koga ally. Just then, the wind picks up and blows a now-familiar stink into everyone's noses. A white projectile falls from the trees and smacks one of the Igas in the head. It lands on the ground with an Icky Thump by The White Stripes, allowing everyone to see what it is: the severed head of a Kishu Inu!

Everyone who is able to lifts their heads to the treetops which seems to be the new entry point for all characters. One of the forest's largest trees is covered in the silhouettes of tens of mohawked dogs. On the highest branch stands the leader of the Kogas. Wilson's eyes widen and he squeaks out "It's him... The Devil Dog."

The Devil Dog laughs as Akame utters a SEETHING "Kurojaki." The merle brindle laughs gutterally, congratulating the Igas on their new feat in stupidity. These new guys here? They were innocent the whole time, duh! And their arrival worked out well to distract the Igas while the Kogas formed a new plan of attack. Now the filthy nonbelievers will be destroyed, and their ancient master's home will become the new domain of the glorious Koga clan.

It's only now that Gin realizes the Kogas outnumber the Igas pretty badly. Kurojaki instructs his soldiers to attack the enemy. The cannibals launch themselves tooth-first towards their foes. Kurojaki takes one look at Akame, smiles, and then disappears up into the tree.

Akame knows that the bastard isn't running away, he's just going to go and retrieve his secret weapon. He tells his men to defend themselves, the soldiers, and the manor while he pursues Kurojaki. The albino scrambles away while the others, Gin included, fight on.

Gin tears into the nearest Koga when he notices that one of the Igas, the youngest one, is scared to do the same. The dude seems inexperienced and afraid, not like the other warriors. One of the Igas calls out to him, scolding his little brother Hayato for being such a puss.

To demonstrate how hardcore ninjas have to be, Hayato's ubermasc big bro drags his Koga of choice back into the flooded tunnel, no doubt intending to drown both the brown dog and himself. Hayato cries out to his unnamed sibling, blubbering about how he wishes their father were here to help them. Jinnai, one of the Igas present, tells Hayato to dog up - Akame can't hold their hands forever, and they cannot shame their pops by showing weakness.

Hayato's eyes fill with tears and so do Gin's. Gin has an Epic Bruh Moment and realizes that the Igas are the children that Ben had freed Akame for, and in turn the albino has raised them to defend their home at any cost.

Gin can't help but think of Riki standing on the mountaintop, gazing down at Gin and commanding him into life-or-death battles alongside the other dogs. Would he change his mind if he knew Gin was his son? Hell, what if he DID know and just didn't feel like treating Gin differently? Gin is knocked out of his stupor as the Koga he's fighting kicks him in the face and runs away.

Gin's mind is elsewhere, though, so he hardly notices. Instead, he decides to help poor Hayato. Hayato's actually doing alright at holding his own and it's probably because he's gotten super pissed at his brother's death.

The idea of the day is #diekogascum, so Hayato allows his opponent to chase him to a strange looking plot of grass. Gin squints at the ground for a moment before looking horrified. Before he can tell Hayato to stop, the Kishu plays Follow The Leader with the Koga over the plot. The strange foliage turns out to be debris covering a pit trap. Both Hayato and his adversary scream in agony as they fall into it.

Gin runs over to see what's become of them. He gasps at the sight. Both Hayato and the Koga are dead. The hole is surprisingly wide, and it's filled to the brim with spikes worn to points. Both lifeless bodies slide wetly down the stakes, each leaving some of their guts strung up behind them.

Disgusted by the gruesomely skewered corpses, Gin gallops back to the others. That tears it, by gum. These Kogas are fucking WAY too much shit up, and the only way to stop this madness is to boot them into next Wednesday.

The Kogas are kinda swaying that way too because they've realized the Igas are willing to wipe themselves out so long as they can take some cannibals with them. Despite their greater numbers the Kogas have weaker spirits, and they really don't wanna be kabobbed to death today. The mohawked murderers leap back into the trees with Gin following right behind them.

This time they can't escape Gin's righteous anger as he snags one by the hind leg. Turns out it's Maya, and despite her skillz, she's no match for Gin's moralistic tantrum. He downs her in an instant, sending the two of them crashing to the forest floor.

Maya's got a nasty gash on her face now. Rivulets of blood pool beside her cheek as she lays unmoving. She weakly looks up at Gin and manages to gasp out a question: what the fuck? Also, is Gin one of the shinobis? Gin shakes his head and proudly introduces himself as a bearhound, but it ends up being pointless ego stroking because Maya loses consciousness.

An impressed Akame descends from the trees. He tells his men that Kurojaki has gone back to the Koga marshlands, probably to retrieve his scythe. Gin doesn't know what a scythe is, so he just asks Akame what they should do next.

After Akame explains the need for antidote to the youngster he apologizes for harming Gin's friends. Luckily, as the epic pwnage was taking place, some of the Kishus scraped together some rainy day herbs to cure the Ohu dogs' ailment. Unluckily there wasn't enough for everybody. Ben in particular ain't doin' so hot. He's refused to take even the smallest bite of antidote before all his men are cured.

Akame insists that they need more of The Cure (years active: 1978-present) asap and Gin is totally on board to gather some. There's just one itty bitty issue: the plantidote is a water root that grows exclusively on the perimeter of the Koga's wetland territory. Kurojaki and the Dogchompers will be on high alert given the preceding events, so it'll be an especially dangerous mission. This doesn't sway Gin at all, though he is a little worried at the possibility of a scythe being a machine gun.

The other Kishus here, Jinnai and Kirikaze, elect to also come with. And so he four go on the most nerve wracking field trip ever conceived. As they venture forth, Maya picks herself up off the ground, taking advantage of having been forgotten in all the excitement. Despite her flesh wound, a nasty grin spreads across her face. This is too perfect - the leader of the Igas is wandering right into her hubby's domain. She gives her body a rough shake before she stumbles back to the marsh.

While everyone else is running to the swamp, the Ohu dogs are taking their medicine. Smith is the only one well enough to dole out rations and he's having a heck of a time convincing Ben to take his meds. In fact, he isn't making any progress at all, as Ben just bats anything he's given away with a trembling paw. Ben insists in that fatherly tone of his that Smith feed all of the others instead.

Cross, the Kai Bros, and Wilson all try to share their herbs with him, but even as he grows too weak to speak he continues refusing everything he's offered. A single tear rolls down Cross's cheek as Ben's mouth whitens with foam. He meets her tearful gaze as his bloodshot eyes glaze over.

The sun begins to set on this long, dreary day. But hope may be on the horizon yet. Akame and his crew have entered the Koga domain undetected and have located the antidote! They each dive into the pond and yank the roots up, snagging as many plants as they can carry. Gin smiles in relief only to realize that the worst is yet to come. He and the Igas look on around the pond's edge.

The Kogas have soundlessly surrounded our hapless heros. An ugly, crackling laugh taunts them as Kurojaki steps out of the shadows. A bloody-faced Maya stands smugly by his side. Their infant son stands between daddy's front paws and meets Gin's eyes with an innocent, oblivious stare. Kurojaki takes a moment to survey the invaders in the lake. Between his jaws he grasps a sharp, sweeping blade.

----------

Thank you to everyone who waited patiently for this episode! We’re at the point where some of the biggest diversions from canon will start cropping up, so hopefully they’re enjoyable. And holy SHIT they keep getting LONGER

Episode 5: The Beasts

[robronanniversarycelebration]

Through a mother’s eyes

For @robron-fic-ideas. Happy Wedding 2.0 anniversary!!!

“Sarah, do you have a minute?” She wasn’t surprised to see Aaron on her doorstep one afternoon, more surprised that Robert wasn’t with him than anything, but they often called in if they were passing. This seemed different somehow, but she couldn’t put her finger on why.

“Oh yes, of course love. Come on in. What can I do for you then?” He looked nervous and she couldn’t help but smile. That even after all this time he didn’t know where to put himself in her home. “Sit down then.”

“It’s about Robert.”

“He’s alright isn’t he? He told me he was off to Harrogate for some new deal or other.”

“He’s fine. I…I wanted to talk to you.” She relaxes a little at his words but she can’t help but notice how he’s not in the slightest relaxed.

“Well I have nothing doing, so I’m all ears. Do you want a cuppa first?” He nods, checking his watch again and she busies herself with the kettle, keeping an eye on him. She noticed he kept checking his pocket and finally it dawned on her why he might be here. “There we are. So…what was it you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Me and Robert.”

“Oh you’ve not had another row have you?” She asks, trying to keep the amusement out of her voice. Their arguments were fairly legendary in the village, explosive and short lived but perfect fodder for village gossips because the two of them didn’t understand the word private.

“No. It’s…well…I wanted to ask you something, because you’re all Robert’s got and…well there’s Vic of course…and Andy…”

“Aaron love, you’re going to hyperventilate or something.”

“Sorry. Well, you know I love Robert and how he’s been there for me.” She smiles because of course she does.

“You’ve been there for him too love, you know that.”

“Maybe. Bet you wish sometimes that he’d never met me.”

“Don’t be daft. Besides, no one else would put up with him!”

“I know it’s been rocky, but I…I love him and…I wanted to ask you…” She watched him fiddle with whatever was in his pocket again and decided to put him out of his misery or they’d be here all night.

“Aaron…are you asking my permission to marry Robert?” He stares at her wide eyed and for a minute she thinks maybe she’s wrong until he grins sheepishly and nods. “And if I say no?”

“I’d ask him anyway.” She can’t help but laugh at the determination in his voice.

“Then you have your answer love. Now, more importantly, when are you going to do it? And how?”

*****

It’s funny, the memories that come back to you, but as she waves him off, standing on the doorstep, Sarah can remember the first time she met Aaron. A little scrap of a thing turning up at the school gates, hand in Robert’s, being led along by her headstrong boy.

“Is it alright if Aaron comes home for tea, mum? He’s my new best friend.”

She’d nodded, not asking what had happened to Ben, the boy Robert had declared his best friend only a few weeks ago. In her heart she knows that Robert had been upset when he’d talked about him not having a Mum. He’d not really said as much but Ben hadn’t been invited for tea since and he barely mentioned him anymore.

The two of them had chattered non stop all the way back to the farm, well Robert had, poor Aaron barely got a word in edgeways but he seemed happy enough, laughing along at Robert’s jokes.

Jack had shown them round the farm before tea, the two of them sharing a look over their heads at Aaron’s wide eyed gaze at all the animals. Robert was telling him about them all, showing off really but it was harmless. Aaron was hanging on every word.

When it was time to take Aaron home she’d thought he would burst into tears, Robert too until they promised Aaron could stay over at the weekend, as long as it was alright with his Mum.

The two of them were inseparable from that day on, through the first years of primary school, Aaron almost a permanent fixture at the farm through the holidays every year, until one day he stopped turning up at the gate with Robert.

“He doesn’t go to this school any more.”

It was all she could get out of Robert. They tried calling the number they had for Aaron’s Mum because he was so upset, but it was unobtainable. He closed himself off a bit that day, nothing she or Jack could do to shake him out of it and he didn’t bring anyone else home in place of Aaron so they stopped asking. The next few years were a mix of fights and disagreements, losing the farm, Robert hearing all of it, doing his best to keep it from his little sister, the one person who could now get a proper smile out of him. When Andy joined their family she’d hoped it would be different but the rows just got worse, Andy loving the farm when Robert wanted nothing more than to run away as far as he could.

She worried about him, always on his own, head stuck in a book most days. She’d like to think it was her influence but she knew the truth. He was working his socks off to get good grades, the only way he had to escape the farm. He didn’t want to carry on the family tradition like Jack insisted, causing rows so furious it felt like the foundations were shaking. Nothing she said could get through to either of them.

It was his fifth year at school when he came home one day, big smile on his face, opening the door properly to reveal a lad about his age who looked familiar.

“You remember Aaron don’t you Mum? Can he stay for tea?”

Within an hour it was like Aaron had never been away, the two of them laughing and joking across the table. She couldn’t help but study Aaron across the table, he looked older than he should, only really relaxing when Robert was talking. She’d shook herself, resolving to stop looking for trouble. Robert was happy, that was all that mattered.

That summer something changed between he and Jack. Neither one of them would talk to her, Robert shutting himself in his room, barely even venturing out for meals, and Jack was in a black temper for days. The next day Robert was nowhere to be found, a bag of his stuff taken, his prized books gone from his desk and she was beside herself, incensed when Jack seemed unbothered.

“It’s alright Mrs Sugden, he’s with me. He’s safe.”

No matter how many times she told him to call her Sarah he never did. It was sweet really. She knew everyone in the village thought he was a tearaway and she supposed he was, but she saw a different side and besides, he made Robert happy so he couldn’t be so bad.

She relaxed a little, knew he was safe with Aaron and eventually he’d come to her. She needed to just give him time.

She found out in the end what had happened and her heart broke for her little boy and she tried her best to make him see how wrong his Dad had been. She could tell it was futile, he believed every word and it made her hate Jack for hurting his son that way.

They never made it up, him and Jack, she’s not sure they even spoke another word to each other before he died. He’d come to live in the village with her and Vic after the marriage broke down. He’d run again when she told him, after the phone call from Annie. She knew where he’d go, knew he’d be safe.

Aaron opened the door to the pub, letting her in straight away, Robert on the sofa, games controller abandoned beside him, eyes red and not from staring at the screen. He didn’t want to talk, she knew him well enough to know that so she followed Aaron into the kitchen.

“He won’t talk to me. I only just managed to get out of him what was wrong.”

“That boy has every bit of his father’s stubbornness. There’s no good forcing him, he’ll talk to you though, when he’s ready, like he did before. Just look after him for me.”

Like the rest of the village she’d been shocked and upset when Robert had told her that Aaron had tried to kill himself in the garage, not long after. He’d found him and the look on his face when she found him pacing the hospital corridor broke her heart.

“Why couldn’t he tell me Mum?”

She couldn’t answer him, could only hold him as he cried on her shoulder for his friend. She wished the answers came as easy as they had when he’d been little.

In the end they’d fallen back into their usual friendship easy enough, even if Robert did turn into a mother hen for a while.

She had an inkling that Aaron had feelings for her boy, thought that maybe it was mutual even if Robert wouldn’t or couldn’t admit that to himself yet. She saw the way they would look at each other when the other wasn’t watching, how what they said mattered more than anyone else.

She watched as Robert married Chrissie a few years later, Andy by his side instead of Aaron, watched him smile and dance with his beautiful new wife, oblivious to the man in the corner whose heart was breaking into little pieces. No one was more shocked than her when Robert had asked Andy to be best man, even Aaron. She knew there had been a distance between them for a while, since he’d met Chrissie. He’d been so single minded, the new job, impressing her father in a bid to be the son his late father wanted, that there was no room for Aaron. It wasn’t her place to interfere no matter how much she longed to.

All she could do was watch as they drifted further apart and hope one day her son would see sense.

She was sure he knew even though Aaron had never told him how he felt. In fact she was sure Robert still felt the same way but the words from years before had left their mark and he was still doing all he could to make his Dad proud, even though he was no longer there to see.

She liked Chrissie, she did, but she knew Robert, could tell there was something not right, he wasn’t completely happy and maybe it was inevitable that their marriage would fail before they’d even marked a year off on the calendar. He’d come home, tail between his legs, dropping his bags on the table, guilt all over his face as he told her about Rebecca.

He’d been a bit like a lost pup after that, moping around the house under her feet for weeks. There was no Aaron to take his mind off anything. He’d fled to France with some rugby player that turned up in the village, not long after Robert had left with his new wife, coming as close as ever to revealing his true feelings.

“I can’t watch them around the place, all happy and in love. It’s better this way.”

He’d told her the morning he’d left when she’d asked him outright whether he loved Robert. She’d wanted to tell Robert he was leaving but Aaron wouldn’t let her saying it was for the best that he didn’t know.

When Aaron finally came home Robert had kept away, stubborn as ever.

“He left. He hasn’t tried to contact me.”

“Maybe you should think on why that is.”

He’d been annoyed with her that day but he had to figure it out for himself, had to overcome Jack’s words. She could only hope he would.

She’d thought maybe once the divorce was settled that he and Aaron might find their way to each other but instead they just wandered round the village ignoring each other. She knew Aaron’s Dad had turned up and he clearly wasn’t happy about it, but that didn’t explain why he was avoiding Robert.

It was a week or so later when she’d been stopped by Chas, frantic because Aaron had disappeared. At the time she’d not thought much of it, he was an adult after all, but then Robert didn’t come home until the next evening and she’d never seen him look so lost.

“I don’t know how to help him Mum.”

She couldn’t get any details from him, not then but it had all come out and in the midst of her heartbreak for Aaron and her anger at what he’d been through, she couldn’t help but be proud of how Robert had been there for him.

Eventually they’d got together but it seemed like they were more off than on for months, until they were over and Robert wouldn’t tell her anything about why.

It had been late one night when it all changed. Aaron had turned up on her doorstep saying those exact words, soaked to the skin from the rain as she ushered him inside.

The stupid feud with Andy had ended up with Robert getting shot. Aaron had been there he said, they’d been arguing. It was all they seemed to do these days, the two of them too determined to be right about everything  to ever get anywhere.

They’d sat together in the waiting room, looking up every time someone walked past, hoping it would be a doctor with news, hopefully good.

“You still love him don’t you?”

“I never stopped. Even when he winds me up.”

“So tell him.”

She thought he’d ignored her, he’d gone from the hospital as soon as he found out Robert would be ok and she didn’t see him again until the two of them walked into the pub together not long after Robert was discharged. Nobody else would probably notice the difference but she did, the little touches on Robert’s arm, Robert’s hand on his back as they pushed past the crowd of people.

She waited, hoping they would tell her but in the end her impatience ran out when they were in the corner booth at the back of the pub, no one else nearby.

“Do you boys have something to tell me?”

*****

“Mum! I can’t find my tie!”

“It’s on your…oh honestly.” She grumbled, climbing the stairs up to the room Robert had stayed in the night before. At least that had been the plan. He might think because she was getting older that she was stupid, but she could hear the door creak open and shut well enough, and she could see him walking up the lane to Mill too. “I left it on your bed while you were in the shower. Look it’s right there.”

“Oh. Yeah, sorry.” He’s dressed, waistcoat hanging undone and shirt collar up around his ears as he stared out of the window.

“What’s wrong?” As she steps further into the room she sees what it is he’s staring at. “He’s not here any more Robert.”

“He is, up here.” He points a finger at his head, still staring out of the window at the graveyard.

“You’re the only one who can get rid of him. You know he was wrong, and I know that doesn’t help, but he was, and you’re getting married to the man you love, the man you’ve loved for years despite all your protests to the contrary.”

“Do you think he ever would’ve accepted it?”

“You know I can’t answer that love. You’re happy and maybe that would’ve been enough for him, but, and this sounds harsh, your Dad doesn’t matter. It’s what you think that is the only important thing.” He shrugs. “Does Aaron know you still feel like this.”

“Yeah. He said the same as you.”

“I always said that boy had sense. He loves you, loves you so much he came here and asked for my permission to marry you.”

“He…he did?”

“Yeah. I had to have a little fun, and I asked him what he’d do if I said no.”

“And?” He sits on the side of the bed, running the tie through his fingers, a small grin on his face.

“He said he’d ask you anyway. Don’t you see, he doesn’t care what anyone thinks. He loves you and that’s all that matters.” He nods but won’t meet her gaze. “So, get that tie on, or you’re going to be late.”

*****

“I call upon these persons here present, to witness that I, Robert Jacob Sugden, do take you, Aaron Dingle, to be my lawful wedded husband.”

She’s watched them go through a lot in their lives, and she’s been proud, not just of Robert, but she doesn’t think she’s ever been prouder of her son than watching him marry the love of his life in front of the whole village.

[forever-rogue]

Unintended Consequences - Part 8

Summary: Y/N and Ben had been best friends since the day six year old Y/N dropped her ice cream in front of Ben and he had offered her his. The rest is history. Until Ben went to Hollywood and disappeared for five years, before suddenly waltzing back into Y/N’s life with one simple request.

A/N: Y’all were very split as to whether you were Team Ben or Team Joe. I’m curious to see it after this chapter as well…  You guys know I like drama...Anyways, thanks for reading and enjoy! Taglists are open! xx

PS - big kudos if you can spot all my references that I’ve sprinkled in :)

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Word Count:  5.2k

Warnings: language, a lil sadness, some steamy moments

MASTERLIST

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“I’m starting to think that the only mistake was coming back to you, Y/N.”

The words washed over her like a cold waves crashing against a rocky hillside; cold, jagged, and searing.

Her chest started to rise and fall rapidly in anger. She spotted the glass lampshade near the door and thought about chucking it at him, at least that way he could physically feel the pain his words had inflicted upon her. But she stayed her hand, her body instead trembling with anger.

“Then why did you come back, Ben?” she shouted at him, not ready to let him have the last word. She followed him out of the room as he tried to retreat to his own bedroom. He stood in the doorway, shoulders tense but he refused to turn around. Crossing her arms over her chest, she was ready to demand an answer, unwilling to back down, “why did you come back? After five years…you could have just stayed away. You managed to for so long, why now?”

“I already told you,” his voice was lower than it normally was, a sense of both annoyance and anger. He knew it was probably wrong of him to be this angry still, but he was fuming; he felt like he had been used in the worst way possible.

“You gave me a bullshit answer,” her voice shook lightly as she thought back to the day he had unceremonious return. If she had known then but she knew now she would have just ignored him. But she had to be too soft hearted, so desperate to have a piece of her past back, “is that what you’re going to be sticking with?”

“Yes,” he answered simply, turning around and facing her, harsh glint to his normally soft sage eyes, “I needed you for a reason. You’re fulfilling that reason. And once it’s done, it’s done. If I had known you’d be so cold and bitchy this whole time, trust me, I would have stayed far away.”

“Oh yeah, it’s not like I have a reason to be mad,” she huffed, tired of arguing about the same thing over and over. If he wasn’t understanding by now, she feared they he might never get it. It was a constant game of going in circles and never reaching a resolution.

“I’ve apologized-”

“Words are wind,” she shouted at him, unable to control her feelings any longer. She probably sounded like something akin to a banshee, but she didn’t care anymore, “words didn’t help when I struggling through life while you off doing God knows what!”

“You think it was easy for me? It wasn’t exactly always a fun journey for me either,” he countered slamming his fist loudly against the wall. She knew it would be bruised later on, and was a little surprised that the wall wasn’t damaged from the hard slam. The neighbors across the hall could have probably heard their little fight.

“I never once said that!” she threw her hands up in exasperation, “all I’ve been trying to get you to see it that you could have been there. You should. Like you always promised. Or have you forgotten that too?”

“Y/N-”

“No, I’m not going to be quiet,” she raised a finger and pointed it squarely at his chest, almost jabbing his heated skin, “do you remember that day? We were seven years old. Playing with our Legos, and I asked you if we were always going to be friends. You promised me. You said we’d even get married and get a dog.”

“You’re hanging onto memories from almost two decades ago. Let them go,” he furrowed his brow as her face fell. She could have broken down and cried right then and there, the cruel reality of his words crashing down, and hard, on her ears. Y/N inhaled sharply, biting on the inside of her cheek to keep from crying, “we were just children.”

“See that’s what happened,” she said quietly, “I didn’t forget who I was. Or who we were. But you did…you never would have forgotten who you were.”

“Who we were…exactly, in the past,” Ben remained steadfast in his determination to be right. He knew he was being standoffish but he was beyond caring, he wanted her to hurt like she had hurt him by claiming what they had done was a mistake. Petty yes, but in that moment it was extremely satisfying.

“People don’t change that much,” it felt like he had sunk a dagger into her heart and was twisting it slowly, progressing with each word he spewed out, “I’m still that same person. Obviously, I came back to you, even most people would have run for the hills.”

“That’s a lie,” his nostrils flared in anger. She was staring to hit a nerve; he was always sensitive about how people perceived him. He’d never quite adopted that bravado and swagger he exuded outwardly into his heart, “people would love to be in your position and you know that.”

"Until they met the real you. Your outward appearance is wonderful, even I’m not going to deny that, but once they get to your heart, it’s a whole different story,” a single tear dripped down her face and she didn’t bother to wipe it away, “there’s no way for me to get you to see how much you hurt me. and honestly I’m done trying. Otherwise this will just keep going on and on, and we’ll hate each other even more.”

“I don’t hate you-”

“You could have fooled me,” she almost laughed at the nerve he was displayed. He shook his head silently in frustration

“I just hate that this what we’ve become,” he decided to end the conversation then and there, turning to go back into his room, “I guess things will never be the same.”

“That was your decision,” she shrugged, “not mine. I am sorry for what happened last night. I’ll take my share of the blame for that. It wasn’t fair to you and I should have stopped it. I suppose I even am sorry about kissing Joe…not sorry, but I should have told you I liked him. But you’ve got to take your share of the blame too.”

“There is no blame for me to take,” he scoffed, “you’re a big girl you could have walked away. You didn’t have to let it go so far.”

“See that’s your problem,” she huffed in frustration, “you’re not willing to understand or anything. You just get mad and shut everyone out. Life doesn’t work like that!”

“In case you haven’t noticed, our lives aren’t normal in any capacity,” he put his hand on the knob, ready to slam the door, “we aren’t normal!”

“I-I want out,” she almost shouted just before he slammed the door. He stopped, stunned at her sudden declaration, “I’m done with all of this, I just want to go home. I want to forget that any of this ever happened.”

“That’d be breaking a contract,” he informed her and she shrugged, “a legally binding one in case you’ve forgotten. There are consequences to what happens when you break a contract. Unintended or not.”

“Would you actually enforce it?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. She knew he was reaching low by even suggesting this; it seemed like he was willing to do anything to get a rise out of her, “what, you’re going to take me to court if I leave?”

“Yes,” he stated simply. Deep down he knew that he wouldn’t really do anything like, but he wanted her to think he would, even if it was just to get a rise for the time being.

“I’ve got no money to pay you,” she huffed, running a hand through her already messy hair in exasperation, “I’ve got no job, no place to call my own. You know that…and you don’t even need the money.”

“Sometimes it’s about proving a point,” he shrugged his shoulder innocently. Ben was starting to hate himself more with each word that rolled off of his lips, but he found himself unable to stop spewing venomous words, “actions always have consequences, Y/N.”

“I’m starting to see that,” she wanted nothing more than to punch him squarely in the face, to damage his perfect features, “if you want to play it that way, then fine. I’ll stay. It’s not like I’ve got much choice.”

“If you stopped because so overly dramatic about everything it would be fine. We can have a future together, you know,” she immediately shook her head at his words, “we can still make this work.”

“Not when you’re being like that,” she smiled tearfully, trying her very best to keep herself from completely falling apart, “I don’t even know you anymore. I had some hope that you were still in there, the real Ben – my Benny. But you’re not. I have no clue who you are anymore.”

“You say that, but you know it’s not true-“

“It’s true,” she interrupted sharply, a bemused smirk on her tear stained face, “but that’s okay…I’ll let used to it. I’ll do my job just like a good girl, and we’ll call it square. I’m done fighting with you, I’m done trying to rationalize anything that’s going on. We’re not the little boy and girl who met over ice cream, who shared their Legos, who grew up together. I’m going to accept that. I hope you do too.”

“Y/N, don’t be like this,” he said harshly, wishing she would just stop talking. He was feeling near a breakdown himself as she kept wearing down his already weak defenses. She had always known how to get him, how to bring him out of his shell, and she was slowly succeeding in it, “let the past die. Kill it if you have to.”

“I can’t do that,” she disagreed with him, “I’m not like you.”

“So, where does that leave us?” he asked suddenly, his hands on his hips, a foot tapping lightly against the cold floor, “tell me exactly what you want.”

“I want us to forget everything that’s happened between us. You want to forget the past, fine, we’ll let it go. But then the rest of this,” she pointed her finger between the two of them, still in their disheveled states after having spent the night together, “is forgotten as well. You agree to my terms, or I’ll walk away. I don’t even care about the money, I’ll find some way to pay you back.”

“What about your new boyfriend?” he almost spit the words out; he wanted to be mad at his other best friend, to call him a snake for kissing he girl he was in love with, “you want me to forget about him too?”

“You have no reason to be angry with Joe. He’s an innocent party,” she wished he was there to defend both himself and her, “he didn’t know about how you felt-”

“What did you tell him? Did you tell him how you felt about me?” he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the answer, or if he would have preferred to remain in the darkness. When he had seen them kiss, it had broken his heart. The way they had leaned into other, it was a soft, tender moment, intimate and only to be shared between lovers. It should have been him, not Joe was drilled into his mind. If he couldn’t have Y/N, then Joe definitely couldn’t.

“I told him the truth,” she said honestly, “I told him I used to love you, that I used to have feelings for you. I told him what happened between us.”

“Oh,” there was a knot forming in his stomach, and he thought he might throw up. Joe knew too much; Ben had been very careful about what parts of ‘the truth’ he had provided to his closest friends, and it appeared to be coming back to bite him in the butt. 

“And I told him that I had feelings for him too,” she felt her cheeks heat up as the truth came out. She hadn’t intended on falling for Joe; if anything she thought she would slowly be falling back in love with Ben. But things had gone very topsy-turvy, ending up in a mess that nobody had anticipated.

But there was something about Joe, his sweet smile, those soft hazel eyes, the musical laugh - everything that was slowly thawing her out and winning her over. He was kind, a gentle soul to his core, and he made her feel like nobody else had in a long time.

“How do you even know you like him?” Ben huffed, incredulous at her somewhat startling confession. He didn’t think they were actually getting to that part, “you’ve only known him for a few weeks.”

“That doesn’t matter, Ben, time is insignificant,” she countered, “and it’s not like I said I was in love with him. But I do like him, and I’m not going to hold back my feelings just because it makes you feel insecure. I’ve been up upfront with both of you. Joe wants to talk to you about everything, Ben. He feels like he owes you. Or are you going to just cut him off too?”

Ben let out a sound somewhere between a scoff and a half laugh, “I don’t want to talk to him about any of this. He should have known how I felt. It should have been obvious to him..”

“Not everything is obvious to everyone else, Ben,” Y/N sighed loudly, “you have to talk to people, open up to them so they know. You didn’t tell Joe anything about us, how could you possibly think he would have any inkling?”

“Whatever,” he threw back his head and squeezed his eyes shut, rolling his neck and relishing in the popping feeling, “you can do whatever you want with him. I don’t care, just don’t force me to look at it. You can at least spare me that much.”

“If you’re agreeable to my terms, then I’ll agree to yours.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” she echoed back at him, a little taken aback by his lack of bite, or back chat. He did a number of avoiding her eyes, but gave her a nod of confirmation, a single golden curl bouncing and gleaming in the bright morning light.

“Yup,” he popped the p loudly, “I said okay.”

“Okay,” she repeated, almost in a mocking way just to annoy him. He remained wordless, but finally stepped back into the room and and slammed the door shut. It was such a forceful slam, the generic pictures that hung on the walls of the rented apartment shook, threatening to fall to the floor.

Much like me she thought to herself, ready to bend and break at any second.

Y/N sat in front of the television, aimlessly watching the reruns of The Office that were on loop. She’d seen every episode at least ten times, but it provided some good background noise; just enough to keep her mind from drifting too far.

She had been anticipating Joe’s return, waiting with nerves running high. She wanted to intercept and warn him about Ben before he went to speak with him. At least that way she could spare him some torture. Every sound she heard made her jump and look towards the door, sure she would be met with the sight of his face. But it never was, only the sounds of the bustling city met her ears.

Just as she was about to drift off, her eyelids getting heavier with passing second, she felt a soft tap on her shoulder. Almost jumping out of her spot on the couch, she glanced up to see Joe looming over her, a half smile on his face.

“Joe,” she breathed out, unable to prevent the smile that was threatening to break her face in half. He leaned down ever so slightly, pressing his lips against hers in a soft kiss, ala Spiderman. It caught her guard for a moment, but she quickly reciprocated the kiss, letting her lips linger against his.

“Sorry I’m back so late,” he finally said as he pulled away, sitting down on the couch next to her. He put his around on the back of the couch and she fought the urge to just snuggle up against him, “did I miss anything? Are you alright?”

“Honestly, I don’t know how to answer either of those questions,” she admitted nervously, suddenly very interested in the loose strands coming apart at the end of her sweater, “it’s been a day to say the least. I-I talked to Ben.”

He could tell by the shift in her tone, subtle but there, that it hasn’t gone extremely well. She pulled her knees up to her chest, and resting her head on top of them, let out a weighty breathe. Joe reached over and gave her leg a reassuring squeeze, trying to be as gentle as possible, “what happened? Is he…okay?”

“I fear that it’s just a pretty big mess and somehow I don’t get the feeling that he’s okay,” she closed her eyes, trying to block out the images of his upset face that floated around her mind, “he was mad that I wasn’t ready to fall back into his arms, I explained to him yet that I was just going to do that. I told him it would take him, especially considering he wasn’t anything like the person he used to be. He just told me to let it go.”

“Can you?” Joe asked, even though he had a pretty good idea of what her answer would be. She laughed though her nose, and cocked an eyebrow at him, “I suppose that was a silly question.”

“If your best friend left, the one you had known for years, the one you thought you knew, left and came back a different a person, could you just get over it?” she mused out loud, and Joe knew he wouldn’t be able to. He just shook his head silently, confirming her own response, “exactly. Which is why this is so weird. Bits and pieces of him are still there, but….it’s not the same.”

“It must be hard,” he commented dryly, watching as she stared off in the distance, not focusing in on anything in particular.

“There was a day, and I remember it so clearly, when we were children, playing with Legos and building a house and little versions of the us,” the same memory he wanted her to forget. But Ben had remembered it too; that’s why it pained him so much, “I asked him of we were always going to be friends. He said yes, and promised me even though we had decided even back then that adults were silly. We were going to get married and even get a dog. But that’s obviously so far from what’s happened.”

“Even though it’s not the reality that’s panned out, you should be able to hang onto that memory,” Joe could picture the young versions of the two of them, sitting around and intently playing the plastic bricks together to build their own little world, “you don’t have to let the past die.”

“I didn’t think so either,” she answered with a half-hearted laugh, as she traced never ending figures into the fabric of her pants, “but someone has other ideas. I just don’t know what to do with him anymore. I wish I could just let him go and forget about him, but I know I can’t.”

“Letting go of the people you love, or once loved isn’t it easy,” Joe agreed; he’d lost several close friends over the years himself, and it hurt just as much each time, “but it doesn’t you have to. Ben’s not a bad person, not the Ben I’ve known anyway. I realize I haven’t known him nearly as long as you, but I don’t think he’s a bad person. This hard for him too, although in different ways.”

“I know,” Joe just had to be the voice of reason. Even in her heart of hearts, she knew Ben wasn’t a bad person. He, much like her, was just confused and conflicted as well, “I just hope he sees my side of things at some point. I think I understand his version of things, but he needs to see him. And not just invalidate my feelings.”

“Well said,” Joe gave her a sweet smile, almost enough to melt her heart right then and there, “do you think I should…”

“No,” she cut him off abruptly before he could get another word in edgewise, “probably not the best idea, at least for now. I told him that I liked you, I was honest with him about my feelings. He wasn’t exactly thrilled.”

“I swear, I didn’t know before...:” Joe started but quietly trailed off, his voice almost cracking as he a wave of realization washed over him. He should have known Ben had feelings for her still. Why else would he have gone back to England to find her and propose this crazy plan to her? But the moment he had laid eyes on her at the airport, he had felt himself falling for her, “I should have been able to put two and two together. I feel like a complete fool.”

“It’s not your fault, Joe,” Y/N didn’t want to see him beat himself up over any of this. If nothing else, Ben should have been upfront with him about his true intentions as well; especially considering he claimed that Joe was his closest friend. Y/N had tried her best to be honest and forth and coming, even though it had been hard, “Ben should have told you how he felt, not just think you knew and then brood about it. Besides, I don’t feel the same about him anymore.”

“Positive?” he asked, needing the reassurance in order to prevent the nagging feeling rising in his stomach. He knew he shouldn’t feel bad about how he was feeling, he had nothing with malicious intent, but it was still there. He knew he couldn’t help how his heart felt. She wondered if she should have just told him about the fact that they had inadvertently ended up in bed together the night before, but decided against. Now wasn’t the time.

Y/N leaned across the couch, reaching out and gently taking his hand in hers, rubbing her thumb across the back of it gently, “I like you, Joe. And trust me, falling for my ex-best friend that still has feelings for me and I might have had repressed feelings for as well’s current best friend was the last thing I intended on happening. But well, it happened. You know, I’ve learned a lot over the past couple of years, had to do a lot of growing up, and while a lot of things still remain a mystery to me, I have learned that almost nothing goes according to plan.”

“What did Ben say about all of this?” Joe felt his heart start to thump wildly in his chest, mainly due to shock by the fact that she returned the exact feelings he for her. He could only imagine his soft face; how upset he must have been. He hadn’t been in Ben’s exact situation before, but the feeling was already weighing in heavy on him.

“Well, he said he didn’t care,” she almost laughed, knowing full well it had been a been a bold-faced lie, “the one thing he asked was that we just…weren’t together around him. Which I can understand, to a point. I also don’t want to have to hide anything.”

“Point well made, but even if we were to…go on a date, or whatever,” there was a small smile playing on the corner of his mouth, “we’d still have to keep it quiet. What would people think if you were supposedly dating Ben but you were out with me?”

“That hadn’t even crossed my mind honestly,” how could she have been so silly and forgotten that not so minor little detail. That was the whole person she was even here – the only reason she had met Joe, “I don’t want to have to hide my entire life, Joe. I can understand when we’re out in public, because obviously I agreed to that with Ben, but in private? I don’t want to hide in the shadows.”

“We can figure it out, sugar,” he took her hand and turned it over, running a deft finger along the lines of her palm, “we’ll take it one step at a time. But first things first…would you like to go out to dinner with me? As in yes, a real date.”

“You might either be bad at reading the signs,” she grinned at him, “or just a real sap. But I think you know the answer is a big obvious yes by now.”

“Really?” he asked enthusiastically, still somewhat surprised by her answer. She just looked at him and nodded, entertained by his childlike reaction, “what should we do about…you know…”

“We don’t have to tell him,” she almost surprised herself by how easily the words flowed from her mouth, “he doesn’t want to know, so he won’t. It’ll be our little secret. At least for now.”

“Okay,” he rasped out as she moved closer to him, their faces only centimeters apart, his breath fanning over her face. She reached up and gently touched his face, fingertips grazing the light stubble he had allowed to grow there.

He couldn’t stop himself from closing the distance between them, effectively pulling her onto his lap, and crashing his lips against on hers, desperate to taste her again, to her body against his. Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck, one hand carding through his auburn hair as his hands held firmly onto her waist.

This was so different from how it been with Ben the previous night. With him it had felt rushed, and more forced than anything else, her mind had wandered to all sorts of places. But with Joe it was so different; it was soft, but needy, a sense of fervent passion mixed in as their lips meshed together. Her mind wasn’t anywhere but on Joe, how good it felt as he touched her tenderly, the little bit of scratchy feeling of his stubble against her cheek, how soft his lips were, how he made little sounds of content as she kissed him.

In that moment all she knew was the she wanted him – him and only him.

“Joe,” she almost moaned as she pulled back for a moment, both of their chests rising and falling rapidly as they tried to catch their breath. She rested her forehead against his, nuzzling her nose against his. One of his hands slipped under the hem of her shirt, fingers ghosting over the soft bare flesh. She bit her bottom lip as she looked at him, “I-I don’t know if we should do this right now.”

“Do you want to?” there was a note of trepidation in his voice, like he too was questioning whether or not they should continue on. He wanted to, there was no doubt in his mind, but he wasn’t about to capitalize on the situation if she wasn’t ready to. He’d never forgive himself if he did that, “we don’t have to anything, especially if you’re uncomfortable or not ready. I want you to be ready.”

“I want to, Joe,” she reassured, rutting her hips ever so slightly in his lap, “I just don’t know if I’m going to be able to stop if we start.”

“Then don’t stop,” she looked like she was about to speak again, so he cut her off by pressing his lips against hers, pulling her body tightly against his, “but if you need to stop, just tell me.”

“Please just kiss me,” it was her turn to cut him off, smirking against his lips, and giving into his dominance. She would let him take all the control if meant she got to be with him.

Ben had thought he heard some commotion coming from the living room and wondered what it was. As far as he had known, only Y/N was home, and as annoyed and angry as he was, he wanted to make sure she was okay.

His jaw almost hit the floor as he realized what he had stumbled up. Y/N was perched in Joe’s lap and the two of them were going at each other like they were the only two people in the world. He thought about going over and punching Joe square in the face, telling to let go of his girl, but he stopped himself. He watched them silently, blood boiling and anger rising with each passing second.

But he didn’t do anything. He just watched them for a few more moments, wondering if they’d ever notice. But they didn’t. They were far too involved with each other.

At one point, Y/N pulled back from Joe, a small giggle escaping her lips, as Joe had let out a low moan, “shh, silly, or the whole world’s going to hear! Remember what we said.”

“Our little secret.”

The words crashed over Ben’s ears as he felt like he had been punched in the gut. He inhaled deeply a few times before turning around and rushing back to his bedroom, closing the door silently so they wouldn’t know he had stumbled upon them. He angrily wiped at the few tears that had spilled down his cheeks before throwing himself onto the bed. He had practically given them all the leeway in the world, but it still strung, cutting him like a knife.

Our little secret. Our little secret. Our little secret.

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[clairen45]

The Bridge Trope in Star Wars and what it may mean for IX

Besides being iconic markers in our daily lives, bridges are an awesome symbol:

transition and a boundary between sky and earth, life and death, real and imaginary, mortal and immortal,  good and evil, civilization and the wilderness,rich and poor, old and new

marking both a connection and a separation through time and space, between people, between places

Which is why, they are so easily used in stories as a decisive step in a hero’s journey, the Rubicon moment, the ultimate test, when through wit, trick, or strength, a bridgekeeper must be defeated. Let’s say it is a hero’s journey and fairy tale classic.

Add to that the fact that bridges are quite the war movie cliché, they are obvious landmarks to destroy, and vital targets to control. Destroying a bridge often means isolating and weakening the enemy, depriving it from communication and food, water, or medical supplies.

So, of course, we get to meet the bridge trope again and again in Star Wars. And, more often than not, the bridges we get are bridges of Death. From the Phantom Menace’s Duel of the Fates

To Han’s death in The Force Awakens.

It is actually fitting to say that both scenes constitute an interesting framing for the Skywalker saga. Duel of the Fates is a very apt name for the beginning of the saga. Remember that Anakin’s name is etymologically “Ananke”, that is to say Fate, Destiny. Anakin’s fate is in the balance there, and the end result of who gets to become his Master and teaching him about the Force is key. Had Qui Gon lived, possibly, there would not have been any Vader. As for, Han’s death in TFA, the constant play of words between sun and son, and the not so subtle imagery of light and darkness, is supposedly all about Kylo’s fate. If Qui Gon’s death is possibly the first step towards the fate that will turn sweet lovable Anakin munchkin into big bad Vader, Han’s death is the counterpart of this scene, thus the first step towards big bad Kylo turning eventually into lovable Ben Solo. And just as it took three movies to realize the Fate of Anakin, it will take three movies to realize the Fate of Ben Solo. But I digress. Or not.

Because both stories, which interact like mirror images of each other, are perfectly hinged around two other crucial bridge scenes. One in ESB. And one in ROTJ. You know what I’m talking about, right?

And these two are also counterparts. ESB’s bridge scene is Luke’s symbolic death scene: learning the truth about his father, and losing his hand, he would rather choose death and commit suicide. ROTJ’s bridge scene is Vader’s death and Anakin’s redemption, with Luke accepting the truth, Vader losing a hand, and choosing to save his son’s life. Even the placement of the actors emphasize this idea of mirror image. So Luke gets his Troll Bridge twice: he fails the test the first one, falling to the chasm and falling apart, and succeeds the second time around. Doing what? Throwing away his saber. Choosing love. Refusing to kill.

But I would also like to stress out that, from a certain point of view, Luke is not the only one who gets tested there on the Troll Bridge. Anakin, just like his son, also fails the first test and passes the second. In ESB, he has little to no love to offer and tempt Luke to his side: he offers the vague promises of the power of the dark side and ruling the galaxy together (which didn’t work with Padmé either). In effect, he is selfish, abusive, scarring his son physically and psychologically, and does not seem too distressed when Luke lets go and falls “presumably” to his death. In ROTJ, he chooses the losing side, standing against the Emperor to save his son’s life, which he knows, will eventually cost him his life. Thus, he is showing empathy and remorse, and saves Luke through a selfless act of love.

Yep, that is what the OT is about.

And, arguably, these two scenes constitute the very axis around which the other two trilogies are built. Hence my first “digression”.

It is also very interesting to note that in the four cases exemplified so far, the “bridges” in question are seemingly “reactor cores”, excuse my tech ignorance. These scenes are never about bridges out in the open, over a river, connecting two shores. They are always played out over a chasm, surrounded with energy fields, in dark environments with a possible fall into a bottomless abyss... Two possible interpretations:

because they are battle of the brains, moral battle of good versus evil within oneself. Inner battles. Think grey cells, cerebellum connections, as a map for these duels.

because they are battle of the heart. Issues of love. “core”

Honestly, I think they both go together!

Symbolically, they are your typical “choose the right path” bridges, the life and death, good vs evil bridges.

The many bridges of Luke

If you actually consider the OT, Luke’s journey is very much rhythmed by a series of bridges. Which might seem ironic for a boy coming from a desert planet with no water, and thus, no use or concept for bridges (besides rocky arch formation such as we see during the pod race in PM). But consider the last name GL decided to give him: SKYWALKER. That was not the orginial name he had chosen, right, since in first drafts Luke was called “Starkiller”. Consider then what a huge difference it makes when you move from a very martial moniker “Star/killer”, which is all about destroying life and light (and Luke actually comes from “light” etymologically speaking) to choose something that means: the one that walks the skies. Not flies. WALKS. And if you walk the skies, chances are you are walking on a bridge of some kind (like mythological rainbow bridges). Crossing a bridge is very much akin to walking the sky: you are suspended between heaven and earth. So even the name GL chose for his star family is all about “walking” on bridges.

The “bridge” moment in ANH is rather brief, but quite interesting. It is actually the “NO BRIDGE” moment, the one when Luke and the Princess find themselves locked out with no crossing, and stormtroopers shooting at them. This moment:

What does it reveal about Luke? His ingenuity, since he uses his farmboy utility belt to cross the bridge, but then also his instincts, the fact that he can rely on his roots (what he learned as a farmboy), his audacity, his ability to take a leap of faith (something that will play out later in his relationship with his father). But it also sets him apart as a different kind of hero. The NOT MY LUKE people should really pay attention to these details. Sure, he plays the hero, saves the damsel and everything, but in this scene they work together, she also gets to protect them, he trusts her with defending them, she is the one giving him a kiss for luck. This is very positive masculinity. Heroic, but not pushy. Manly, but respectful of women. Physical but also using his brain. Luke is such a dear.

In ESB, the big bridge moment is the one I already referred to. The moment of truth. Having these two characters on a bridge is very clever of course. It’s all about meeting in the middle. A bridge is by essence a balancing act. Can they meet halfway or will they cut all connections? Can opposites reconcile? Will they connect/reconnect? What better way to talk about human emotion and love than put them on a bridge, the very metaphor for communication, leap of faith, and the possible danger of reaching out to the other with your feelings?

But ROTJ goes even further with the bridge metaphor. Going with this when Luke reveals the truth to Leia...

To carry on with Leia and Han, where Han shows more of his emotions ans proves how supportive and selfless he can be when he is just there to comfort her in the end, putting away his jealousy and self-doubts:

Followed with this, for Luke and Vader’s first meeting since ESB when Luke calls him “father” for the first time and tries to bring him back:

To conclude with the bridge sequence already mentioned when Vader chooses to be Anakin all over again.

WOW.

And where does it all take Luke? To a water planet with NO bridges. Seriously. When VII opens, Luke has chosen to sever, metaphorically speaking, all the links to others. As if he had chosen to destroy every bridge that could connect him to Leia and the rest of the world. And when we see him going about the island, there are no bridges. He jumps from one cliff to the other. Interesting thing is on The Art of The Last Jedi you get to see some of the art concepts that they had for Ahch-To that included a lot of variation on bridges:

But eventually they went for the very design that removed any bridge from the place that Luke has chosen to spend the remaining days of his life until his death. Which is, I must say, a very good choice. He disconnected himself from the Force, he disconnected from people he loved not telling them where he hid, it made absolutely no sense to put him on a place that was covered with bridges. The bridges were meant to be burned.

That is... until one very last moment. Which is the perfect segway into my next chapter... Until the end. When he projects himself for one final face-off with his nephew. And that is a big bridge metaphor about reaching out across the stars. And we know that when Luke is on a bridge with someone he loves, this doesn’t mean harm or spite or revenge. Or even fighting. Bridges in SW are not so much about fancy duels as they are about love. Yep, even in PM. There is the love that Obi-Wan (yes, even a Jedi) feels for his master, and the need to extend and take care of a little boy that is all alone in this galaxy. A leap of faith. Love. Which means...

The ST is about crossing that bridge

Yes, there are bridges in the ST. And how Kylo and Rey are going to be able to cross over and meet each other. Let me explain. This happens at the end of VII:

Visually, it tells us that there seems to be no possible bridge between the two characters. Yet, the whole point is that they keep on looking towards each other. The bridge,aka the connection, is their eyes (mirrors of the soul yadiyada). And sure enough, comes VIII, and the bridge is there. WTF, will you say? What bridge are you raving about. Well... that one...

The Force bond.

And how do I presume calling this a bridge? Because...

It was I who bridged your minds

Interesting choice of words. But there it is. Put it as plainly and simply as you possibly can. The Force bond is a bridge, a spiritual bridge between Kylo and Rey. That’s quite something, right?

Which means that, there may be some physical crossing of some kind in IX. Now, I don’t want to be presumptuous and declare for sure, but it would seem like a logical concept. And on Vic Mahoney’s moodboard...on the left, some of the pictures seem very bridgelike...

And that’s also where I want to bring in that clever little TV kid show called Star Wars Rebels.

Take it to the Bridge

So Star Wars Rebels came before the release of TFA, in 2014, merely two years after Disney bought LF and therefore all the rights to Star Wars. Let’s look at what they did there and let’s wonder why. I don’t think that it was a random move on their part. They could, after all, have imagined something that took place right before TFA, or come up with the many adventures of Luke and the gang, or even spend more time on the Clone Wars, or go way back in the Old Republic. But no 14 years after ROTS, 5 years before ANH, is the time they chose. And came up with a totally new gang we had never heard of. Except that... well... the new gang got to meet A LOT of familiar faces. From all over the place: Hondo, Rex, Ahsoka, Vader, Leia, Mon Mothma, Bail Organa, Obi-Wan, Darth Maul, Yoda, Lando, C3P0 and R2, Palpatine, just to name a few... The point is that they get to meet people from the PT AND people from the OT. Thus (you know where this is going) bridging story lines. And, surprise surprise, what special name did they choose for their hero? Ezra Bridger. Gosh, that’s not even subtle, there. And by the way, what does Ezra mean? Helper. So Ezra helps bridging... aka, Star Wars Rebels helps bridging, connecting, if you will storylines. Towards a logical conclusion. And what is this conclusion, pray? The ST of course. And who stands on the bridge? Kylo and Rey.

Even better, what particular storyline did they preciously choose to keep to conclude this new Star Wars story:

the return of the Mortis Arc, balance

the World between worlds, and its very specific bridges that cross through time and space, and the possibility to alter the past/future, plus bringing back loved ones

looking for knowledge (last time I checked it was not so much about knowledge in the PT and OT). But Ezra’s story is all about knowledge.

love and sacrifice, saving the people you love (Ahsoka, Kanan, Ezra), and, come on, Hera and Kanan’s baby (by the way, Kanan is very reminiscent of Canaan, the Promised Land, so keep the prophetic aspect in mind)

Again, how will it play out in IX? I have some ideas but I really can’t tell whether it will show up or not. There have been rumors about an artifact (very SW Rebels) that would require both Kylo and Rey’s powers. So knowledge. So possibly with notions of Mortis implied in there (balance). Love, sacrifice, we have discussed a lot. Remain the bridges. I can totally envision an important scene taking place on a bridge, with Kylo and Rey embracing, or running to each other, or holding hands while everything else around them crumbles. I can also imagine a bridge playing out with an intimate scene as we got in ROTJ in the Ewok village, something akin to the terrace where Anakin and Padmé first kiss on Naboo and finally get married. Again, the film has already been shot. So too late for that already and there’s a fat chance that it won’t even happen. But since we got a bridge of death in VII with Han’s death, we need a bridge of light.

Which might just turn out to be the symbolic bridge of Rey and Kylo coming together and finally uniting the light and the dark sides...

Leaving Simon and Garfunkel’s Bridge Over Troubled Water behind as a great Reylo vibe. Seriously. Reylo vibe, guys!!!!

When you're weary, feeling small When tears are in your eyes, I'll dry them all I'm on your side, oh, when times get rough And friends just can't be found Like a bridge over troubled water I will lay me down

When you're down and out When you're on the street When evening falls so hard I will comfort you I'll take your part, oh, when darkness comes And pain is all around Like a bridge over troubled water I will lay me down