#believing in someone when no one else did. seeing something worth supporting when no one else did. being the one person they trust.

[epicfirestormer]

Will never get over how Starscream and Skyfire's relationship is always doomed. There's never an iteration of them where they both stay on the same side at the end. They always end up being against each other, tearing each other apart (whether intentionally or not). They always end up losing each other, be it by a snowstorm, by the war, or by death itself. They never receive a happy ending together, one if not both of them is doomed to suffer.

Skyfire is doomed to be an Autobot, by forces out of his control. Starscream is doomed to be an Decepticon, by his own self destructive tendencies. They are both doomed, because of who they are. They always try to save the other, in their own way. But it never works. They are doomed to fail, whether they stay together or not.

[humanityinahandbag]

I'd like to tell you all a story about my grandmother.

My grandparents raised their children, four girls (one of them my mother), to be fighters. My aunts marched in Washington for women's rights with babies strapped to their chests and like to joke that all of the grandchildren who came from that line (including myself) were born with picket signs in their hands.

But it started with my grandparents. They fought hard for what they believed in. They marched against Vietnam. They marched for Martin Luther King. They marched for women's rights. They marched for a better future.

But let's talk specifically about my grandmother for a moment.

My grandmother unfortunately passed away in 2016. She had to watch the first Trump election and did so knowing that it would probably be the last election she'd ever see. And there is some argument there that she could have given in to fear and defeatism. She could have decided none of it was worth it, and she could have decided that fascism had won and the world was over.

But she did something else instead.

To give some context, my grandparents had friends who were Republicans. I say were, because they shifted from the normal Republican towards the MAGA Republican we see today. And despite a very clear message from my family about how we felt, they were more than ready to still come to the funeral as if everything was normal. Like their beliefs were normal. Like they were welcome to celebrate someone who had fought so hard for the rights of other people.

These were people who would have absolutely used their rhetoric to scream and shout if they were left out or disinvited.

And so my grandmother, even past her final moments, pulled the most brilliant, petty move I've ever seen.

She'd decided ahead of time that everyone who had known her was more than welcome to attend but that she wanted everyone attending the funeral to donate money. That was the requirement to be invited. And so everyone did just that. There was no talk about what the donations were for, just that they were appreciated. I want to say that the assumption was the money would help pay for funeral expenses and give the family some support while we grieved.

Except that wasn't the case.

Because in those final moments of the funeral, the rabbi stepped forward to thank everyone, and then very cheerfully announced;

"Arlene was so happy to know just how many people were coming to join us here today. She couldn't have been more proud of her family. And I'm sure she would have been elated to see just how much money you all gave today to Planned Parenthood."

When I say that the faces of those people are enshrined in my memory, I mean it. The anger, the devastation, the rage, the betrayal. It was an absolutely gorgeous display of true defeat at the hands of a boss ass old lady who literally fought with her last breath and threw up both middle fingers all the way out the door.

What I'm saying is this.

It is very easy to feel defeated. It is very easy to think that everything is over, and there's nothing left for us to do. It's very easy to say that fascism won, that fear won, that hate won.

But that's only true if you let it be true.

There is always more that we can do. There is a future that is still worth fighting for. And it's more than possible, even when it doesn't seem like it.

And fighting is going to look different every time.

Some days it will look like picket signs in our hands.

Some days it will look like spending time with friends and family and people you love and knowing that you have a community that supports you and your vision of a brighter future.

And some days, it's pulling absolute natural level 20 petty trickster shit even after you've left the world.

Because you can always make an impact and you can always add a little brightness to life, and if that means tricking a group of MAGA idiots into throwing their money behind Planned Parenthood in the middle of your own goddamn funeral then that's what it means.

Keep fighting. People have done it before you. People will continue to do it after you.

And enjoy the little victories.

(Even the petty ones)

[anakinstwinklebunny]

Author's note: smth for my angsty people. Inspo from amazing writer of all times @rssmary

SAM MONROE thought he'd never find someone who truly understood him. Then there was you—brilliant, kind, and everything he didn’t think he deserved. You were his lifeline, the one who believed in him when no one else did. When you told him you were pregnant, he was terrified, but your excitement and unwavering faith in him made him believe he could be better for you—for both of you.

But life is cruel.

The labor was supposed to be hard but worth it. Everyone told him that once he heard the baby’s first cry, he’d forget the pain of waiting. But when your hand went limp in his, and the machines blared around him, he forgot everything else instead.

Time stopped as they pulled him away, shoving your baby into his arms while they tried to save you. The nurses told him to hold on to the little one, to stay strong, but all he could do was stare at your lifeless body through the window, his mind refusing to accept the reality.

You were gone..

You

Were

Gone

He tried to understand the meaning of the words

Days bled into nights as Sam sat in the nursery, the small bassinet feeling like a cruel mockery. The baby—their baby—was beautiful, with tiny fingers and your nose. But every time he looked at them, he felt a sharp pain in his chest. It was like holding his heart outside his body and knowing it came at the cost of losing his own soul.

The funeral was unbearable. He didn't appear at the ceremony, hell, it pained him to even think about going there. Yet, he still did. Out of respect and love he had for you.

He stood there alone hours after the ceremony, staring at your casket, tears streaming down his face. 'I can’t do this without you' he whispered into the silence.

Because who he was? A random guy who wore eyeliner and constantly did drugs now to raise a child alone?

Yet, still, he had to.

The first night without you was the longest of his life. The baby cried and cried, and Sam had no idea what to do. He was a mess—fumbling with bottles, pacing the floor, begging them to stop screaming. At some point, he sank to the floor, the baby against his chest as he sobbed into their tiny body. “I’m sorry,” he choked out. “I’m so sorry.”

His mother was all supportive, helping Sam to do the stuff he never thought he'd have to do, but Sam refused to let anyone fully take over.

'They’re all I have left of her' he'd constantly say, not letting anyone to his room

Every milestone felt like a knife to the chest. The first time they smiled, he saw you. The first time they babbled, he heard your voice. And yet, he celebrated it all because he knew that’s what you would’ve wanted.

Sam made sure they grew up knowing you. He told them stories about your laugh, how you used to tease him, and how you were the bravest person he’d ever known. “Your mom,” he’d say, his voice holding onto the life to not break, “she was magic..wherever she is right now, she definitely loves you so much”

But there were nights when the grief swallowed him whole. When he’d sit in the nursery, the baby fast asleep in his arms, and cry silently. He’d whisper to the darkness, wishing you could see them, wishing you could see him trying so hard not to break.

“Why’d you leave me?” he asked once, his voice cracking as he rocked your baby in his arms. “How am I supposed to do this without you?”

He'd often find himself doing something so out of character to him - each week he wrote you long letters about the baby, about new stuff they did or how he got peed on while changing the diaper. Letters were hidden properly under his bed, becoming a mountain of folded papers. It was therapeutic to him, but also he felt like he owe you that, to let you know how his life's going without you, how he still lives - for the sake of your baby.

As the years passed, Sam became a father you’d be proud of. He was there for every scraped knee, every bedtime story, every school play. He wasn’t perfect—he had days when the weight of your absence was too much—but he loved fiercely.

Still, most of the nights, when the world went quiet and the baby-turned-toddler slept peacefully, he’d sit by their bed and mumble quiet “I miss you.” as if you could hear him

And he did.

Every.single.day.

Because no matter how much time passed, the hole you left in his heart never healed. You were his first love, his only love, and even though you were gone, you were everywhere. In the way the sunlight streamed through the windows, in the baby’s laughter, in the quiet moments when he closed his eyes and pretended you were still there.

And though it hurt more than he could ever put into words, he wouldn’t trade a single second of it. Because loving you, even in your absence, was the greatest thing he’d ever done.

And he’d spend the rest of his life making sure your baby—your legacy—knew just how much they were loved by the most extraordinary person SAM MONROE had ever known.

TAG LIST: @kingdomhate @divineani @haydensprettyprincess @skyguys-princess @catnipaddictt @heartscone @haydensbbg @inneedsoffanfics @jediavengers @literally-izzy @anisluvrgirl @slutforfinnickodair @xhunnybeeex @fuckmyskywalker @gallerygourmet @deceptiive @anakinskwkler @bimbo-baggins17 @cookybananas @emotionallybruisedx @diorvalentina @sevinax @throughparisallthroughrome @aniiuv @ritosparty @ninastyless @lily-strnlo @thesassypadawan

(if you want to be on the tag list or don't want to be, don't be shy and let me know 💋)

[widow-tarot]

MINI PAC READING: What Would They Tell You If They Could? (Romance)

GROUPS: 1 - 2 - 3 4 - 5 - 6

You can always tip me! - paypal.me/sadwidow

If you want to support me, please reblog!

Instruction: Think about your person while choosing a group. Do not use more than 1 group for one person. Just to remind you, this is only for entertainment purposes.

If you don't feel drawn to any group, then this reading is not for you.

GROUP 1

Cards: Ace of Wands, Knight of Wands rx, Wheel of Fortune rx, I Like You, Girl Talk rx, Pond, Archangel Metatron.

I like you. I know it's straightforward, but I cannot say it in any other way that's more meaningful or more direct. It might not sound meaningful but it is to me (I hope it is to you too). I feel there is a spiritual connection between us and it seems no matter what, we keep coming back to each other. Our connection is like a pond; can be insignificant to others but to us, it holds so much life and secrets but it can easily be destroyed if not cultivated. We are so hot and cold; we like each other, then we hate each other over something trivial (we both don't know what exactly annoyed us). I want to move towards you but things are holding me back. There's so much I want to do and say but I'm standing still. I know we will truly come together someday. No one knows about it because I don't share those feelings with friends. It seems too private and sacred.

SONGS:

Eric by Mitski ("Take off my clothes and watch me move; You can come closer, I'll let you hurt me; But how long, how long can we play this way?; I'm tired, I'm tired of not loving you"

Blue Velvet by Lana Del Rey ("Ours a love I held tightly; Feeling the rapture grow; Like a flame burning brightly; But when she left; Gone was the glow")

Nothing's Gonna Hurt You, Baby by Cigarettes After Sex ("Whispered something in your ear; It was a perverted thing to say; But I said it anyway; Made you smile and look away; Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby; As long as you're with me, you'll be just fine")

GROUP 2

Cards: 9 of Pentacles, 2 of Pentacles, 7 of Cups, Noose rx, Mushrooms, The Snake, Hammer rx, Seraphim Seraphisa rx.

You will forever be in my heart and mind, but we can never be together in the way we want. There are way too many blockages and I do think we are not fit to be in a relationship. I am in a committed relationship (or you are) and I do not wish to leave her for I love her. Maybe I am a coward, but I am a practical and cautious one. I will not take reckless actions just to wake up one day and regret it. I think what we have is a fantasy, pleasant make-believe, daydreaming. However, I don't want you gone because you're an important person to me. I wish you happiness but I can't follow you.

SONGS:

Lonesome Love by Mitski ("I call you, to see you again; So I can win, and this can finally end")

Blue Banisters by Lana Del Rey ("She said, "You can't be a muse and be happy, too; You can't blacken the pages with Russian poetry and be happy"; And that scared me; 'Cause I met a man who said he'd come back every May;Just to help me if I'd paint; Now when weather turns to May; All my sisters come to paint")

Flash by Cigarettes After Sex ("I'm a flash; You were blinded by the love I had; I'm a flash; The light could only get in through the cracks")

GROUP 3

Cards: The Hierophant rx, 8 of Wands, The Devil, 10 of Swords rx, Wildflowers, Mirror, Keys on a Ring, Archangel Raphael.

You are the temptation, the chaos in my life, the wildflowers that can still be growing but can also be already taken by someone else while I wasn't looking. You're untouchable, unable to be caught, translucent. One minute you're here only to leave seconds later just to come back and stay for a long time. You're unpredictable, a sin worth sinning for. But I hate to be alone and you make me sad. I love to see you but I hate myself when you leave. I don't know if you have any feelings for me; is it something serious or is it just casual and convenient? I can't do this anymore, I'm trapped and I feel miserable. I wish I could tell you to stay away, to abandon me, to never come back. It would be easier for me to move on then but I am a fool for you. I wish I was strong enough to talk things through but I'd rather have some of you than none of you. Then again, being with you hurts me so what should I do?

SONGS:

Should've Been Me by Mitski ("Relive all the ways you still want me; I haven't given you what you need; You wanted me but couldn't reach me; I'm sorry it should've been me"

Blue Jeans by Lana Del Rey ("I will love you till the end of time; I would wait a million years; Promise you'll remember that you're mine; Baby, can you see through the tears?; You went out every night; And, baby, that's alright; But when you walked out that door; A piece of me died")

Ambien Slide by Cigarettes After Sex ("Take my love with some pretend; You said you couldn't help it; Had everything that you wanted; When my love was something yours; But now you're feeling helpless")

GROUP 4

Cards: Death, Page of Pentacles rx, The Chariot rx, Archangel Sammael, Eileen Chang rx, Boat rx, Engagement Ring rx.

I don't want to try to fix this thing between us anymore, it's a fool's errand. We tried and it didn't work, it's time to move on to something else because we are just wasting our time and I'm exhausted. Let me go. Let me leave, peacefully. I don't want to fight but I'm frustrated. I think we tried to escape the inevitable but at the end of the road, we cannot pretend any longer. Relieve me of this burden and don't resent me.

SONGS:

Working For The Knife by Mitski ("I always thought the choice was mine; And I was right, but I just chose wrong")

Bel Air by Lana Del Rey ("Gargoyles standing at the front of your gate; Trying to tell me to wait; But I can't wait to see you; So I run, like I'm mad, to heaven's door; I don't wanna be bad; I won't cheat you no more")

Tejano Blue by Cigarettes After Sex ("We wanted to fuck with real love; Wanted it sweet, so pure and warm; And when you say you want it all, I know you want it all; Baby, take it all from me; I always will make it feel like you were the last one; So get in the waves like it was the first time")

GROUP 5

Cards: The Star rx, 7 of Pentacles, 10 of Swords rx, Glove rx, The Phoenix, Paradise rx, Archangel Haniel.

I wish we could start anew, without any bitter history between us that holds us back and clouds our judgment. We cannot fully be together while all these thoughts are troubling us, making us suspicious of each other and insecure. I know we both lost hope for this connection, yet we are still going and proceeding with it in any way we can. We don't want this to be over but we need to find a solution. I want you in my life and I'm willing to put work into it. Are you? Someone needs to make the first step though and it's the most difficult thing to do. We cannot stay still for much longer though. We communicate telepathically but we also have to communicate in real life.

SONGS:

First Love/Late Spring by Mitski ("Please hurry leave me; I can't breathe; Please don't say you love me; One word from you and I would; Jump off of this ledge I'm on; Tell me "don't" so I can crawl back in")

Video Games by Lana Del Rey ("It's you, it's you, it's all for you; Everything I do; I tell you all the time; Heaven is a place on earth with you; Tell me all the things you wanna do; It's better than I ever even knew; They say that the world was built for two; Only worth living if somebody is loving you")

Goodbye Mr Blue by Father John Misty (" But maybe if he'd gone sooner; Could've brought us back together last June; When the last time was our last time; If only then I knew; The last time was our last time; Would've told you that the last time comes too soon")

GROUP 6

Cards: Page of Swords rx, 9 of Cups rx, 4 of Swords, Sappho, Archangel Chamuel, Cupid's Arrow rx, Separation rx.

Do you love me? You say you do why does your love cause so much pain? Why am I in agony instead of being elated and happy? Is this how you show your love? I feel neglected and manipulated. I feel ignored and mocked. Am I your partner or your pet? Do you even care what I want? Do you care what I have to say? You treat me as a child as if I cannot think or decide for myself. Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think so lowly of me? When you're not here, I don't miss you and my mind is at ease. I lost all hope for anything to change. It hurts even more because I love you, but your love is weird and dysfunctional. I feel trapped. I even stopped speaking my mind because it was met with ridicule and anger.

SONGS:

Wife by Mitski ("For if I am not yours, what am I?; I daydream I'd give one a name of my own; For even I am on loan; For even mine is unknown; So let me go towards the morning star; With hope it won't disappear;)

Carmen by Lana Del Rey ("Baby's all dressed up, with nowhere to go; That's the little story of the girl you know; Relyin' on the kindness of strangers; Darlin', darlin', doesn't have a problem; Lyin' to herself, 'cause her liquor's top shelf; It's alarmin', honestly, how charmin' she can be; Foolin' everyone, tellin' 'em she's havin' fun")

Hot by Cigarettes After Sex ("Is it all in my head? 'Cause I keep getting scared; That I'll always be lost forever; But I don't give a shit if I'm too delicate; When you hold me, it's always better")

[causenessus]

💍 + 🩷 + SUNARIN !

see you at the altar. | suna r.

ree. i love you. thank u for this.

suna x f!reader

written in 2nd pov bc i wanted to (ahem. self shipping/projecting a little bit. just maybe.)

prompts from 1k followers event: 💍 -> wedding & 🩷 -> "can i come in?"

"so love me with reservations to every restaurant. walk me down your street pretending we're the only ones <3" from only ones by ruru

word count: 1.3k words

notes: fluff <333 and a little bit of flirting/sexual jokes, mentions of the garter toss so there's your warning. IT'S YOUR WEDDING DAY!!

you try to push down the feeling of anxiety in your chest, sucking in a breath as hitoka tightens your dress from behind.

“you look gorgeous,” your friend says, smiling at you in the mirror you're both facing.

“i look gorgeous in the dress you made,” you respond, returning the smile. “thank you so much, hitoka. you helped me plan everything out on top of making this dress, and i still can’t believe you’re letting me model and wear it in the first place. do you know how many girls would kill to be wearing something like this?”

hitoka only laughs, shaking her head as she tries to deny the compliment. “it really wasn’t a big deal. i’m just doing my job as your maid of honor and best friend. i want to support you in every way. do you need anything else?” she asks as she steps away, giving you one final lookover. she steps forward to fix the angle of one of the roses braided into your hair before stepping back with a smile, admiring her handiwork.

“will you go check on the rest of the bridesmaids? i know i kicked them out just now because the jitters were getting to me, but i still want to make sure they’re doing okay,” you ask, looking at yourself in the mirror.

“of course!” hitoka responds, making her way to the door, “i’ll be right–”

when she stops talking, you turn towards her with a quizzical look. “everything alright, hitoka?”

“oh, more than alright,” the blonde says, turning back towards you with the biggest smile on her face. “you have a visitor!” she exclaims with a giggle before quickly stepping through the doorway and shutting the door.

“well then why did you close the door…?” you say, although you know hitoka’s already walked away from the door and can’t hear you anymore. you approach the door, moving to open it when a knock against it makes you freeze.

“y/n?” the voice on the other side of the door is slightly muffled, but you could recognize that voice anywhere.

your heart rate spikes just at his voice, “rin?”

“yeah. can i come in?”

you almost want to say yes, and you can’t stop the lovesick smile that makes its way onto your face before you respond, “no, you can’t.”

you can already imagine what he looks like, standing on the other side of the door in his suit; the way his hand is already hovering over the handle, and how his brows furrow at your response, “why not?” he asks.

you can’t help but laugh, leaning your back against the door, “because it’s bad luck for us to see each other before the wedding, silly. that’s like the oldest wives tale alive.”

maybe he hears you press your back to the door because you hear a thump, and you mirror each other without even knowing it as you both slide down the floor. you're probably getting your dress dirty, but you can’t find it in you to care. when you're with him, he’s all you need.

“that’s stupid,” he sighs, “why do we even believe in that? maybe someone made that up just to make people suffer more.”

“you’re not going to suffer,” you reply, wishing you could see him or hold his hand. “we’ll see each other soon and it’ll all be worth it. it’s like we’re building up to see each other. i can’t wait to see you in your suit, standing there, waiting for me...” you trail off, closing your eyes and imagining the entire ceremony. a feeling of thrill encases you at the realization: this entire day is for you both. everything is for you and him. to celebrate coming together forever. “will you cry when you see me?” you ask, your curiosity getting the best of you. you're not even sure what his answer will be. neither of you cried very often, and you weren’t sure if it’d be more heartfelt to see a big smile on his face or tears in his eyes.

“yeah,” he answers immediately, causing you to open your eyes in surprise.

“really?” you ask, beginning to play with the trim of your dress.

“definitely. and i told atsumu if i don’t cry immediately he gets to punch me in the face but i’m pretty sure just seeing you when those doors open will be enough,” he explains. “i guess you’re right about that superstition– now i’m really excited to see you in your dress.”

you laugh at his initial statement, “why would you tell him to punch you in the face? then i’ll have to take care of your bloody nose.”

“who said i didn’t want that?” you can hear the smile in his voice, “if i don’t cry the moment i see my wife, then i deserve a broken nose. and maybe that’ll make me cry.”

your heart skips a beat at the word. you’ll officially be his wife in a few hours, and he’ll be your husband. you sigh, “i guess i should have expected something like this from you and the twins. i’m glad they could both make it.”

he hums in thought, “i think they heard you mention the garter toss and decided that this was the most important event of their lives.”

your face warms at the thought. it had been your initial idea, surprising even rintarou, but he had supported you nonetheless (“it won’t be the first time we’ve done something like that,” he’d said in a teasing voice that made your knees weak). you’d been slightly worried about it; having him under your dress, surrounded by all of your friends while his teeth were dragging a flimsy piece of lace down your thigh would definitely be a moment worth remembering.

“what’s wrong? cat got your tongue?” he gibes. “are you still up for the toss? we can always say we don’t wanna do it anymore.”

“no no it’s fine,” you put your head in your hands before sitting back up straight, knowing hitoka will scold you if you messes up your hair or makeup. “i just kinda forgot about it with everything else going on today. i’m a little nervous for it, but i’m excited.”

you hear him laugh and you know your face is red, aware of how wrong it sounds. “i never realized you enjoyed that kind of stuff so much,” he continues to poke fun at you. “i’ll make sure to tease you when we’re out more often. especially when you wear that cute skirt of yours.”

“rin!” you scold, unable to keep quiet anymore, “i didn’t mean it like that.”

“oh? what did you mean then?” he eggs you on. you can’t find a proper excuse or response. the only way that sentence could be interpreted in this context was “i’m excited to have you under my dress” but you didn’t want to say that. he laughs again, “do you just like it when i’m between your legs?”

you whine out of embarrassment, standing up and dusting off the back of your dress as best as you can, “i can’t believe you, rin.”

“you must really love me if i can have this kind of effect on you just with my voice,” he responds, and you hear him stand up too.

“well, i am marrying you after all,” you sigh, trying to look yourself over in the mirror on the wall to your right.

“i’m a lucky man,” he says. “i love you, y/n. i’ll see you soon.”

“see you at the altar, rin,” you smile, pressing a hand to the door separating you both. maybe you're making it up in your head, but you think you can feel his hand against the door as well. if the wooden barrier wasn’t there, you'd intertwine hands. you’d see him in his suit, and he’d see you in your dress. that would be your reality soon enough, anyway.

“i love you so much, suna rintarou.”

[maxislvt]

Sink Your Teeth In

pairing(s): vampire!natasha romanoff x werewolf!reader

summary: Vampires and werewolves were known enemies, but Natasha is more than willing to change that. Even if it's just for one night.

warning: amab!reader, blowjobs, sub!reader, slight dubcon

a/n: ummm nat gives the best head case closed

Event Masterlist

Werewolves and vampires were always at odds with each other. Not a thousand years could go by without vampires attacking werewolves or werewolves attacking vampires. It was all the same bloodline ending bullshit. 'Your father killed mine and now I must kill you!' over and over again. Some of those fathers weren't even worth killing anyone over. It was truly a shame that no one could see how compatible the two factions were. Vampires were strict, organized people that valued loyalty above all else. Werewolves were nothing short of loyal and obedient, you just had to train them. Natasha was so close to finding the perfect werewolf for her to prove that. 

Natasha had tried many times to tame a werewolf, but she'd run into a number of problems. They could be taught, but not many of them were willing to learn— especially not from a vampire. As disappointing as it was, it wasn't exactly a shock. A millennium long feuds were rarely ever one sided. Her previous attempts were also foiled by pride, shame, and simply being too boring to have any real fun.

So, Natasha spent another Friday night on the prowl.

Club Sonar was a rather interesting place. A tall building in the middle of nowhere buzzing with all forms of life. Monsters from all over the globe came together under the moon just to party. It was a messy place. The music was loud, bodies grinded against each other without a care, and secrets of all kinds were shared over the strongest alcohol. Though cultures mixed, money did not. 

Each floor of the bar was more expensive than the last. The alcohol got smoother, the music got slower, and the floors actually got cleaned. Upper floors were for people who supported the cause but had no interest in getting dirty. Natasha had more than enough money to sit at the top floor, but that wasn't any fun. She'd never find what she was looking for if she stayed up there. 

Werewolves were just as wealthy as vampires, but they were rowdy. They liked to play rough and get dirty. Big fancy houses just didn't appeal to them as much. Fancy clubs appealed to them even less. Natasha wasn't looking to tame someone — not to say her hand couldn't be forced — she was looking for someone soft and easy to mold. 

You weren't the easiest to find. Despite your size, the people on the dancefloor had no trouble pushing you around. You kept your head down no matter where you went. Natasha could tell you weren't there on your own, which made it harder to take you home. Not too hard though.

"This really isn't your scene," she said when she took the bar stool next to you. It was hard to keep her eyes in the right place. Your shyness was adorable, but there was no denying what she was really feeling. 

You looked around to make sure she was actually talking to you.  Though you weren't opposed to the conversation, it was hard to believe such a pretty woman had approached you. "Um, no. My friends wanted to come here. I mean it's cool just…couldn't we have a library or something? There's no point in intermingling if you're too drunk to remember what you're kissing."

Natasha laughed and scooted closer to you. "I guess you're right, but there's no shame in being curious. Right?" She looked at the glass in front of you. "Oh, that just won't do." Before you could interject, she tapped the countertop twice and brought over the bartender. It was a quick exchange, you didn't even see Natasha pull out any cash. Despite your confusion, you didn't put up a fight. You were exactly what Natasha was looking for. 

Guilt filled your eyes when you looked down at the fresh cocktail in front of you. Was it more rude to let it go to waste or ask the bartender for a refund? "Oh, you really didn't have to do that." Your hands hesitantly wrapped around the glass before taking a sip of the alcohol. The burn hit you immediately, but you tried to play it off. You tensed up to hold in the coughing fit building up in your chest. "It's…great, thanks," you forced out through a tight chest. 

Natasha gave you a firm pat on the back to force you to cough. She took away the glass and slid this towards you. "I would expect a werewolf to have a stronger alcohol tolerance," she said teasingly. Her hand stayed on your back even after your coughing had subsided. 

You shook your head. "A lot of us have sensitive pallets. I can taste whatever crappy oak barrel they made this in." There was an unexpected comfort in the way she touched you. "I should have asked this earlier, but what's your name?" You sat up straight as her hand moved down your back. You never really paid attention to your posture, but you had the strange urge to be better around her. 

"My name's Natasha, but you can call me Nat if you want. What's yours?"

"My name is Y/N. I don't really have a nickname, but whatever you come up with is fine." 

The conversation continued without trouble. Natasha seemed so enamored with how strong your pallet was. At the expense of Natasha's wallet and your sobriety, you had tasted just about every drink the bar had to offer. Eventually, you settled on just drinking strawberry daiquiris while you two talked. 

Natasha pulled your seat closer to her and she leaned down to whisper in your ear. "So how many more of those little smoothies do I have to buy to take you home with me?" Her hand slid up your thigh and gave it a firm squeeze. She could feel your dick twitching already. "I promise I'll only bite where it feels good."

You practically jumped out of your skin when Natasha kissed your neck. It was quick, but you could feel the pointed tips of her fangs brush against your skin. "Um..Can I finish this one first?" Before Natasha could say anything else you pulled out your phone and texted your friends. 'Leaving with a hot lady, ttyl!' was all you sent before cutting off your phone and downing the last of your drink. 

Natasha adored your enthusiasm. "I promise I'll get you home safe in the morning." She kissed your neck one last time before dragging you outside to her car. It was a good thing she brought her chauffeur along because there was no way she'd be able to keep her hands off you the entire ride home. 

You stumbled behind Natasha as best you could. Vampires were usually weaker than werewolves, but you were a little too tipsy to show your strength. You let Wanda push you into the backseat of her car. One sniff of the air and you could tell someone else was in the car. "You have a chauffeur?" Natasha covered your mouth and pushed you further into the backseat. 

"Home," was all she told the driver before closing the partition and focusing her attention on you. "Yes, but I promise the back of the car is soundproof." It certainly wasn't, but she needed to hear how whiny you could get. Natasha practically pounced on you after she closed the door. The kiss was hot and passionate. Your fangs bumped against hers every time your lips collided. "Can you taste what I drank earlier?" She asked with a giggle. 

A whine escaped your lips when Natasha pulled away. "Um…a lot of vodka and cooper..?" Your answer earned you another kiss. Natasha's lips felt like heaven against yours. She overwhelmed all your senses in the most delicious way possible. You didn't even notice how hard you'd gotten. "You smell…really good." You mumbled in the handful of seconds between kisses. 

She chuckled but didn't respond. You were too cute. "I'm going to make you feel so good tonight." Natasha's kisses moved down the side of your jaw until she reached the base of your neck. Her hands wasted no time undoing your belt and tossing it on the car's floor. One of her fingers circled around the tip of the tent in your pants while she watched you squirm. "You're so sensitive."

You opened your mouth to speak only to be interrupted by a string of cursing and desperate whimpering. "Sorry, I'm just new to all of this," you confessed. It was a little hard to imagine your first time going to a bar would take such a turn. 

"Don't tell me someone as cute as you is still a virgin." Your silence was enough. It was as arousing as it was disappointing. Natasha didn't want to go slow by any means, but the thought of getting to corrupt that innocent little mind of yours was exhilarating. "I promise I'll be extra gentle with your little friend." 

The car parked before Natasha could pull down your boxers. Natasha's lust-driven craze left you in quite an awkward position while waiting for her to unlock the door. Holding your pants up only made your bulge stand out more and there was an obscene amount of lipstick covering your neck. You hoped Natasha wasn't secretly vampire famous or else you'd be in real trouble. 

Natasha pulled you into her home and wasted no time undressing you. Your shoes, shorts, sweater, and T-shirt littered the soft carpet. Natasha had you completely naked by the time she pushed you onto the bed. "You're making a mess already," she whispered seductively as she crawled onto the bed. Her eyes focused on the way your member throbbed and leaked precum. 

Your eyes followed Natasha's as she began stroking your member. It was tortuously slow, but it felt good. A near-pornographic moan fell from your lips as your head tilted back. "Your hands are so soft," you whimpered pathetically. All your willpower went into staying still. You didn't know what to do with yourself. "C-can I touch you too?" You blindly reached out and grabbed the first thing you could feel. Mindlessly, you groped the soft flesh in hopes that it would make Natasha feel good too. Your face burned bright red as she moved your hand to where her breast actually was. “Sorry…I wasn’t looking,” you mumbled. 

Natasha kissed up the underside of your cock before licking all the way down to the base. “A good pup would pay attention to someone making them feel this good.” She waited until you looked down at her. Once she was sure you wouldn’t look away, she swallowed you down to the base. Her cheeks hallowed out as she began sucking you off.

Your hips twitched and your eyelids fluttered, but you tried your best to keep your eyes open. As your orgasm got closer, you found it harder to control yourself. An animalistic growl ripped through your throat as you tried to control yourself. Your fangs forced themselves out of your mouth and your claws had nearly ripped Natasha’s sheets. “W-wait, slow down,” were the only words you could get out before it happened. 

Hot white cum painted the inside of Natasha’s throat as she swallowed down everything you gave her. Natasha didn’t give you a break and continued until you pushed her away. “Is that all you have left?” She blew on your bulbous tip before giving it a kiss.

“N-no, I just…I need a second. That’s all.”

[theunsinkableship1]

This is no ordinary LOVE.

DISCLAIMER: This is LUKOLALAND only. Skip this if you're not a shipper. This is only my point of view. No harm intended

Amidst recent events and news, many in the Lukola fandom have started to reconsider their stance on this ship. While I understand the confusion these events have caused, I want to share why I still ship them and why I remain aboard.

Firstly, this is my first and only ship, and it will likely be the last one. I’ve witnessed many relationships unfold, I’ve been in relationships, attended beautiful weddings, and seen happy, healthy marriages and relationships endure the test of time. I’ve observed deep connections between people, but I’ve never seen anything quite like this. It might sound silly or even a bit offensive to the people in my life, but I’ve never seen love like what I see in Lukola, and I’ve fallen deeply for them.

Like many of us, I discovered Polin during the confinement days. I instantly loved their cute chemistry, as the friends-to-lovers trope is my favorite. I fell for Polin first, read the book, and was eager for their season. After the first season of Bridgerton, I started following  only Nicola, my favorite from the Derry Girls cast also. Then came Season 2, and I really liked Luke and the unique chemistry he and Nicola shared. There was something different about it, and I found myself watching their interviews. They were so adorable in "Amours ou Petits Fours" that I started following Luke Newton too.

I wasn’t shipping them yet because Luke was in a serious, real relationship at the time, one that was also worth rooting for. But when that ended, the idea of Nicola and Luke together began to grow in my heart. Their interactions were sweet, and their evident chemistry bled into everything they did together. I was a casual shipper until that photo of them after his play made me truly invested and hopeful. Then came the press tour in January, every interview, every interaction between them only strengthened what I was feeling. I fell for Lukola even harder.

What I saw, I can’t unsee. This has taken up a significant and unexpected place in my life. It feels different from anything else; I don’t usually follow celebrities this closely. I have always maintained a respectful distance and never invested myself like this. I’m not sure how I got here, but I know it’s not meaningless. There’s a reason for this pull, and while I don’t know exactly what that reason is, I believe it’s because I sense the love between them, it transcends the screen and radiates in my heart, deep and intensely beautiful.

I consciously joined the fandom to see if I was the only one feeling this way, and it’s clear I’m not. My perception of the reality might be altered, but I believe in what I see. Even if they choose to identify as friends, I believe that what they have is love.

Real, pure, and rare love, a powerful force that transcends time and circumstances. It isn’t rushed or forced; instead, it unfolds naturally, growing deeper as both people learn and grow together. This kind of love is built on genuine connection, mutual respect, and shared values, creating a bond that withstands the ups and downs of life.

Why does it matter? Because pure love brings out the best in each person, allowing them to be their true selves without fear of judgment. It’s not about grand gestures but the quiet, consistent presence that reassures and supports. This love matters because it’s authentic and unwavering, offering comfort and joy that can't be easily shaken.

Such love, though rare, finds its way when the time is right. It doesn't conform to external pressures or expectations; it simply exists, patient and steadfast. When allowed to flourish in its own time, this kind of love creates something beautiful and lasting, reminding us that the best things in life are often worth waiting for. As someone who hopes to see Lukola flourish, there’s a special kind of joy in watching two people whose bond transcends their characters on screen, finding connection and harmony in real life. It’s about witnessing moments of genuine affection, support, and camaraderie that hint at something deeper, something real.

This kind of love is worth cherishing and believing in because it reminds us of the beauty that exists in a World that can feel harsh and cold, in a reality that is disheartening and disappointing. It’s the unspoken looks, the shared laughter, and the way they uplift each other in subtle, bold and meaningful ways.

Hoping for Lukola to come to fruition isn’t just about a fandom fantasy, it’s about rooting for a connection that feels authentic, organic, and rare. It’s about believing that what we see is not just a projection of our hopes but a reflection of something real and beautiful that can grow stronger with time.

True love doesn’t need to rush; it will come to fruition when both people are ready to embrace it fully.

If we choose to stay in this Fandom, we’ll have to act very demurely and very mindfully. If this love is meant to be, it will find its way, blossoming when the time is right, and that is a story worth waiting for.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

EMG normal, not done w tests but expect those be normal n even if not, it not explain things

which. normal EMG good thing, yea. have some scary ones on own ddx that this rule out.

people be relief n happy for me n expect me feel same but. don’t have time feel that because all that feel is dread.

dread because this my frail weak last mental defense against trauma & gaslighting & internalized gaslighting “there nothing wrong” “you want something wrong” “you just crazy (derogatory).” last thing keeping me going n trying.

dread that this will (& already has) be use against me. parents already imagine future where “am” in it but am not actually in—a year three years five years later, able bodied walking talking n living independent n “finally happy.” parents encouraged to force me walk use wheelchair less speak more. as someone already with no escape from them because still severely disabled with symptoms & high support needs even if no diagnosis (some diagnosis), who already feel trapped & suffocated & hopeless with no future or escape here before this. worry life going get so much worse.

they don’t understand autism here. don’t understand stereotypical autism don’t understand not-stereotypical autism it all same coin. here see self as ultra in “not-stereotypical autism” category because autism regression include nonverbal late in life. be diagnosed by top autism place in US not matter. it didn’t it doesn’t & it won’t. for people not born nonverbal they see two option: physical muscle or vocal cord issue or psychosomatic mental illness but derogatory. its “real” in sense they supposed say that but its not real. fact that am actually mentally ill just support that more.

wheelchair bad. nonverbal bad. AAC tablet bad. no one can imagine happy life with them except me.

n no one can understand or even try to understand that those actually not what make my life utterly miserable: not have support needs met, not have communication support needs met (give me enviroment that actually feel safe use AAC then maybe will actually communicate more goddamn it), be trapped physically, be trapped mentally by past abuse with people who did that to me who currently doing that to me, have NO COMMUNITY n that there never ever ever will be any community here in person for me so long as stay here. with no end in sight. unless make one for myself. which—too fucking disabled to do that except [redacted]. which. even that, am too severely disabled thus surveillanced to do that.

not to mention those actually one of very few thing in my life give me joy right now (other joy is fiber arts. ok end of list. everything else even stuff used to enjoy is fucking chore. n even fiber arts becoming more of past time & routine than active joy)—it the only fucking thing that giving me any sort of hint of community right now (n also literally allow me do basic function in life like go places but. DIGRESS). even if it fucking small & pathetic & ironically isolating (bc my god the ableism against us. but without community will just be pathetic & isolated ALL ALONE). to advocate take it away, it incredibly cruel.

everyone expect me be able bodied neurotypical walking talking live independent n it that my personal failure not able do that because there “no medical reason” (…still have life long diagnoses but those not good enough real enough for them), faker. n just lost last mental defense against that. so yeah guess am.

dread too for what doctor going say n recommend after all this. honestly more preferable discharge me & let me go back to old life tbh.

in perfect world there be symptom management with no diagnoses & no definitive test results, that focus on work with what got, when it unrealistic or not fucking worth it try turn life upside down make “back” into “normal.” but. mm such thing not exist.

want be treat with dignity & respect & believed & agency even when don’t know what wrong & negative tests.

[noxturnalnymph]

Devotion 🖤 Epilogue

CultLeader!Joel x OFC!Reader

Series Summary: When is it enough? When is it too much? When does Devotion become Obsession?

Visit the Series Masterlist for series warnings, cult info, timeline info, and HCs on ages. Reader has a nickname and some minor physical descriptions - is an OFC from Reader POV.

Thank you all SO MUCH for reading. Thank you to everyone who supported me and listened to me babble about this series since December. Thank you to all the readers who messaged me, commented, liked, reblogged, etc. I see every single one of you and I appreciate you so much. I injected a LOT of my own experiences and trauma directly into this story, and it meant a lot to me to be able to share it with you all. Whatever you're going through or whatever you've been through - you are a survivor, you are enough, and you can save yourself. Writing this has been such a journey and it wasn't always easy, but it was always worth it. xoxo

PREVIOUS

Epilogue

Some Summer Sunday (900) Sunday service is a regular occurrence for you and Joel, and the church gets more crowded every week. You've been noticing the building filling up with people of all faiths, packing in the pews until there’s only standing room left, and then lining the walls. Joel tells you residents from all over The Valley make the trek into town every weekend to see you but you’re pretty sure he’s just being complimentary. Guys say all kinds of shit when they’re trying to get in your pants so when he acts like everyone thinks you’re the holy madonna you just chalk it up to that. 

He’s asked you to wear a nice outfit today in preparation for a big announcement, so you’re wearing a flowy yellow gown with a little too much tulle in the skirt and feeling like a tragically awkward beauty queen. You’re worried he’s going to make a big deal of the greenhouse plans and you’re going to have to stand there while everyone - including Isaac - stares at you, waiting for you to make some kind of speech like you just won a humanitarian award. 

You don’t want to be raised aloft like some kind of goddess, that was where Joel made his mistake. You think it’s more effective to meet people on their level, to just act human and blend in with the group. People like having something to believe in but as long as they’re being taken care of and heard, they work better as a collective. Plus, when something goes wrong there’s not someone risen above everyone else for them to direct blame at, instead everyone just works together towards a solution to the problem.

But what Joel does on this day is even worse than you could have imagined. He asks you to join him in the thick, sweltering summer heat, standing in front of the maxed-out congregation and then, holding your hand in his, he gets down on one knee. Your brows knit in confusion and you’re honestly about to ask him if he’s okay until he pulls something out of his pocket. A ring. A fucking ring. Several women in the crowd gasp and squeal, and a smattering of clapping makes the rounds. 

You can’t believe he’s doing this to you right now.

“I want to give you everything I have, to share everything with you.”

You’re going to die of embarrassment.

“I want your partnership, your company, and your sage wisdom.”

No, he’s going to die. You’re going to kill him.

“I want your mind, your heart, and your body.”

Jesus fuck-, in a church, Joel? 

“I will spend the rest of my life loving, honoring, and obeying you.”

Did he just say-

“Baby,” he winks. “Marry me.”

That wasn’t even a question. He just ordered you to-

The crowd erupts in applause as Joel rises and places the ring on your finger, grabbing both sides of your face and kissing your mouth.

“I didn’t say yes,” you murmur against his lips.

“But you will. You know we’re perfect for each other” he says, looking deep into your eyes. He whispers your name. “I’m so in love with you.”

Words that you once wanted to hear so badly still carry an edge to them, a phantom sting in your gut from an old wound he made.

“You just said you’d obey me in front of everyone,” you say, your voice a whisper.

“I know,” he hums. “And I will.”

This is a lot. You let your guard down at the house, when you’re all alone. You let him hold you and kiss you and fuck you on every surface... but in public? You raise your walls back up, barely letting him touch you. Now he’s proposing marriage - marriage - and practically submitting to you in front of the whole Valley.

“What if I still don’t trust you?” you ask, your voice even quieter.

“That’s one of the things I love most about you.”

This is so fucked up. You know this, you know how fucked up this is. This is so fucked up that you should push him away and tell everyone exactly what kind of man he is, create a mob to distract him while you run away and leave this valley permanently. Tess would probably even help you this time. But the most fucked up thing of all is that you don’t want to do that, you don’t want to leave him. Part of you might hate him but there’s a part of you that loves him too. 

Not the way you loved him before, of course, when you were willfully ignorant of who he was. There’s a part of you that loves the Joel you now know he is. The anger, the power, the obsession. It rolls off him in waves that you can taste and smell, like a thick incense it fills your nostrils, intoxicating you. It makes you crave his violent nature, makes you want to sick him on your enemies like a junkyard dog, makes you want to climb him like a tree and howl at the moon. It makes you feel… exalted. 

“Marry me,” he says again. Just as much a command as it was the first time.

You look him in his dark eyes and nod slightly, watching his devilish smile grow.

You’re not going anywhere. You’re exactly where you belong… at his side.

🖤

THE END

Thank you SO MUCH to Bug for stepping in and helping me when I needed it, you are always fucking there when I need you and your friendship means so much to me I can't even put it into words. I love you I love you I love you. TY Beef for helping me in this process and for your amazing suggestions, encouragement, and absolute hyping up along the way. I am SO grateful for your friendship, you are such a ray of sunshine. I love you so so SO much. 🖤Cult Joel (CJ) would not be what he came to be without both of your help.🖤

no taglists going forward - follow @nox-notifs & turn on notifs🫶

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[joseline-woodhouse]

I want in on talking about Annabel and Prospero.

Since most posts I've seen are about how nice it is to watch them being healthy for one another (it really is, I adore their dynamic) I decided to talk about how neither of them would hesitate to kill one another eventually.

First of all both Annabel Lee and Prospero are calculative people. Both of them care for only the outcome and how to get there. I have seen people call Annabel a hypocrite for protecting Prospero because he's important to her after what she did to Duke and I entirely disagree, more on the rescue from Ada later. We have established that Annabel really doesn't care that everyone in the academy (except one, if the Deans can be trusted) is doomed.

I don't think Annabel's general willingness to sacrifice people needs to be discussed.

Now, I'm leaning a bit far out the window here, but take a good look at Prospero in the left picture above, he looks more frustrated than anything. His chances just got a lot worse, he needs to rethink his strategy and on top of all that Ada is invading his personal space again.

Moving forward to what I think makes their mutual betrayal inevitable, the episodes after the Mansion Arc (this is were it gets interesting):

Until now we have seen Prospero mostly be mildly bothered by whatever is happening. When everything fell apart during the Lesson and everyone except for him apperently just did not do their job, he seemed like he was about to explode and seriously questioning his choice of team. Everyone else appeared to just want to go on with the day, Prospero however demanded answers, proving that he cares to win this entire game without getting side tracked.

Further his behaviour during the lesson shows that he actually doesn't get how anyone else would still be reluctant to kill their friends here. He was genuinely not expecting anyone to act out of empathy anymore.

And after the widow's watch affair and him witnessing Annabel freaking out after the labyrinth and smoothly asking about Pluto instead of giving an explanation, he is surely just one big-ish failure or unwillingness to take action away from openly confronting Annabel how it can be that whenever she is alone with Lenore, things go south ways, how whenever people want to act against Lenore, she calls it a waste of time despite the growingly obvious threat that Lenore poses.

I think Annabel actually does matter to him, and I think he matters to Annabel as well, but both of them expect something really specific from one another and sympathy alone means little to them.

Now about Annabel saving Prospero.

I believe this says everything:

Since Annabel is a chess player, get ready for chess metaphors:

In chess, most gambits are about giving away a pawn. Why? Because a pawn has very little value on its own and sacrificing a pawn in order to get a slightly more profitable structure on the board can actually be worth it.

Sacrificing a queen? If you do something like that, you better be 100% sure you're seeing a forced checkmate.

Not only is Prospero's spector really powerful, Prospero is also the only thing keeping Annabel in control of her own team right now. Other than Prospero who's supporting her as long as she keeps bringing results, she is stuck with Ada who is a complete wild card and useless most of the time, Morella who is only half on her team, Will who is loyal mostly to Montresor and Montresor who constantly challenges her leadership.

The way things are standing right now, everything she has build would fall apart the very moment Prospero is gone.

Also, what if Annabel and Lenore have to stay long enough for their teams to start falling apart? Whom does Annabel want to face in a one on one? Someone like Montresor who's spector can very much use brute force against her or someone like Prospero who's spector is similarly unforceful as hers?

We even saw, that Annabel can just simply neutralise Prospero's rats with her fog, leaving him with no real attack on her. While he applies her with status conditions she can use her blossoms to attack him after she used her fog to make his rats disappear like she did on the widow's watch

Annabel did not safe him because she likes him, which she does. She saved him because he is a very important piece for her game and no real threat to her in the long run.

Prospero follows Annabel not because he likes her, which he does, but because she keeps bringing results. Or at least she did until rather recently.

[kerubimcrepin]

The big analysis of Joris Jurgen's horrible-no-good childhood.

TW: discussions of child neglect, and what might constitute as emotional abuse.

Firstly, to address something, I hadn't in the last liveblog: There are plenty of times in the show where one can see Joris saying things that he may not entirely mean...

But it is especially interesting to see him say something like this immediately after breaking down into tears about it just a scene prior.

Hm. Anyway. I'm sure this won't affect their relationship going forward.

I've discussed Kerubim's issues of self-worth, loneliness, and dishonesty, before on this blog, — but you will never believe it, Kerubim isn't the only one who suffers because of his issues.

It's nigh time we discuss seven-year-old Joris, and the terrible, no good, case of emotional repression and lying.

Let's set the stage first.

Joris grew up in a deeply isolated and neglectful, and at times dangerous, environment, in every single way. And the child neglect Kerubim engaged in lessened, but did not stop after Simone arrived.

He did not have any family members besides Kerubim, — for obvious reasons, both of their family members are either dead, or want nothing to do with them, — and he did not have any friends, besides Tatak. The reason he did not have friends is unknown, but there are several factors that may have contributed to that:

The sorry state of their house might have complicated his relationship with other kids and given him and Kerubim a poor reputation among neighbours;

The part of the city they live in might simply not have a lot of families, due to being a — being, perhaps, mostly populated by adventurers and other people in violent professions, as well as the shops that cater to them (which are, in turn, mostly ran by retired adventurers).

And then there's the third thing: Kerubim is his best friend.

Joris did not have a support system in the form of an extended family, — or at the very least, in the form of friends outside the household, — and It doesn't seem like the other adults Kerubim knows were at all involved in Joris's childhood. Besides that, Joris was seemingly homeschooled, — and, considering Kerubim's finances, and his referencing at least one school's existence, there were other options.

For the large part of Joris's life, they only had one another, and it almost seems like Kerubim, with his abandonment issues, and low self-esteem, acted in ways that isolated Joris further.

Due to Ecaflip's mistreatment of him as a child, and his loneliness due to the death of his family when he was a child, — what he wanted the most as a father was to be a best friend to Joris.

(And, much more selfishly, not that he would admit that, — he wanted someone to replace Lou/Indie/Atcham/Bashi/Everyone else who has left him.)

He could remember being a child, and he knew how he would have liked to be treated, — as a peer, obviously. It's important for peers to respect each other equally, and listen to each other's pain, right?

Except, in a way, Kerubim is perpetuating a cycle here.

And children are not peers, best friends, or caretakers. They depend on their parents for their survival.

And Joris knows what will happen to him, if Kerubim is gone. Kerubim himself was an orphan, and has shared more than enough stories about that.

Because of this, thoughts of Kerubim passing away are a usual worry for Joris, no doubt fueled by Kerubim's dramatics, and love for his attention — and it means he'll do everything to make sure Kerubim is happy and healthy.

Even if it means sacrificing his own comfort for his sake. Even if it means putting up with being treated badly.

Joris and Kerubim have what is known as an "enmeshed", or "codependent", parent-child relationship, the characteristics of which are, according to online resources:

Parents expecting children to be their best friends and always confiding in them.

Children receiving praise for maintaining the family’s status quo, and conflict-avoidant behaviours.

The lack of emotional and physical boundaries.

Role reversal, in the form of the child being expected to take care of the parent's mental health. (Despite lacking the maturity to)

Children prioritizing parents needs and feelings over their own.

Childhood overindulgence, in the form of the parent using the child for wish fulfilment.

Another interesting titbit that informs his character, is that, from a very young age, children learn how to respond to their feelings and express them, based on the way adults behave, by mirroring those behaviours, — and Kerubim is anything but honest about his feelings, more often than not, putting on a brave smile.

Joris values his stories more than anything, despite knowing that, often, they may be fake, at least in some parts. To him, words matter more than the truth of the matter, when push comes to shove between them. But also, he doesn't like outright lies, which are just as plentiful between them.

Despite how he may usually act, Joris isn't really the happiest about how their family is. He knows that Kerubim is dishonest and neurotic, and, in a way, it causes dissonance in his mind. He loves him more than anything, and to trust him, — but he knows that to trust Kerubim is to be disappointed.

When something bad happens? It's a guarantee, that instead of being comforted, it will be his job to pretend to be comforted, so that Kerubim doesn't completely fall apart. So that he can still be taken care of, — and every child wants to be taken care of.

Yet another thing he can't really trust Kerubim with.

Just like Kerubim, he is growing up to be a good liar. And someone very much afraid of being abandoned.

But everyone has their limit, fear of abandonment or not. No matter how much you repress these feelings, they'll come bubbling to the surface eventually.

...An interesting tidbit about children raised in enmeshed relationships, is that, at times, as adults, they find it difficult to trust others, open up to people, or have close friends in general. Due to guilt of those people on the outside not being their family, and due to associating close relationships with pain, responsibility, and giving up a part of themselves.

They grow up to be aloof, flighty, and cold.

Another interesting tidbit is that, sometimes, they find themselves unable to leave at all.

[sophieinwonderland]

Now, why would you dare me to embarrass you and your pals like that?

I appreciate how you wanted my attention so bad you posted me to not one, but two subreddits.

Makes a girl feel special! 🤣

I have actually never seen Wikipedia cited as a source about endogenic plurality. Though I do see anti-endos all the time, when asked for sources, telling people to just Google things.

Anyway, here's @guardianssystem's document filled with academic papers about endogenic plurality:

I've compiled my own, but honestly, theirs is better organized than mine.

And in the interest of fairness, here are all the anti-endo papers debunking endogenic plurality:

Sorry, I forgot. Those don't exist. Oops. 🤷‍♀️

Echo chamber? LOL!

Weren't you the one spouting a bunch of lies on Tumblr, got totally debunked, posted the people who debunked you to r/systemscringe to have a hugbox where fakeclaimers could assure you how the people who contradicted you are all fakers, and then blocked everyone who disagreed with you?

Weren't you also the one who, when shown a quote from an expert in dissociative disorders who worked on the DSM-5 saying that a disorder isn't a disorder if it doesn't cause distress, argued that the people who defined what disorder are must be wrong about that definition?

You're a misinformation machine who can only find support when huddled in cringe subreddits. Don't try to talk about people in echo chambers.

Also, you know most of psychology is just... listening to people? That's how it's been as long as the field existed. DID (or MPD at the time) was a recognized disorder since long before the first brain scans were conducted on DID patients. It's saying something though when basically every single scientist who has ever researched endogenic plurality has said they believe it's a real thing, or that it could be. While absolutely zero academic papers have expressed that it's fake.

There is also an fMRI study into tulpa systems that's been in the works, but results have yet to be published.

Sure, if that's what you'd like me to call you, Crazy. 😊

Anyway, Crazy, you should know that just because you personally find something scary doesn't mean everyone will or that the thing is bad. Personal preferences are a thing.

In a study of tulpamancers though, most generally reported their lives becoming better after the practice.

78% reported improvements in their mental health, and 91% on overall life.

There are many out there who would jump at the chance to have someone there with them that knows them intimately, and to never have to be alone again.

If it's not for you, then so be it.

But it's certainly not something to be afraid of.

And maybe, for those who are willing to commit to the practice while America struggles with an epidemic of loneliness, it's something worth being open to.

This is actually pretty fair.

But that's now, and I'm looking at course of history and trends of plural acceptance.

300 years ago, any plural would be viewed as demon possessed and end up tortured or killed for their plurality.

70 years ago, all plurality was seen as a mental illness, and it was common to force plurals, as well as anyone else associated with mental illnesses, into asylums.

30 years ago, the first real plural communities were able to connect on the internet and form in small numbers.

8 years ago, the first studies into endogenic plurality started being conducted. 4 years ago, the ICD-11 acknowledged that you could have multiple distinct personality states without a disorder. 2023 marked the first, but certainly not the last, time a system used their system name as an author of an academic paper.

Recently, new plural resources have been designed and put into use. More servers than ever are using Pluralkit. And Simply Plural went from 100k users at the end of 2021 to 210k at the end of 2022.

Progress is happening far more rapidly than you realize. And you had best be ready for it.

BOO! 👻

Oh, hey, I just realized... this is literal pluralphobia!

Liberté!

Egalité!

Fraternité!

And yes, The Future is Plural! 😜

[storytellingbadger]

I'm not trying to defend Lunar. I genuinely think he's a hypocrite (just like the rest of the family, to a greater or lesser extent). He's quite immature. Despite shouting about being an adult, he doesn't act like one. This is even the case now that he's hurt the sister he loves so much and then run away.

But I can see how this desensitisation goes back even before the Astrals had any influence. Every time Lunar shows a negative emotion or makes a mistake, like when he killed Eclipse, he was practically abandoned by all his family and friends except for Solar. They didn't offer him any support until he apologised to Earth and she accepted his apologies. What can we learn from that kind of experience? If I feel negative emotions or make a mistake, I'm a bad person.(I've learned that if you hurt Earth in any way, you'll be punished for the universe lol). Given what happened with Nexus, I'm not surprised. It seems that Lunar has never fully recovered from what happened with Eclipse. He seems to have forced himself to pretend that he did, both for the sake of the Astrals and for his family, because otherwise he would be seen as the bad guy. His thoughts probably went something like this: "If I lie and pretend hard enough, I'm sure I'll end up believing it too."

Again, this doesn't justify his bad actions seen in today's episode.

Hello, and thank you for the ask!

I agree about Lunar being immature. And the protect-Earth brigade being activated at a nanosecond's notice, no matter who's involved or what happened.

I don't entirely agree (respectfully!) about Lunar being abandoned whenever he makes a mistake. Astrals, yes, pretty unavoidable when you operate on a completely different emotional and ethical spectrum - family, not so much. I admittedly don't follow the LAES half as closely as TSAMS, but seemed to me that family rarely called Lunar out on his apathy/childishness because it just wasn't worth it. Unless Earth was involved, as you rightly identified XD

More generally, I agree that Lunar isn't over what happened with Eclipse, probably never will be, and may never forgive him. Entirely valid. The 'forgiveness above all else' trope is rampant in media and it's daft. Earth is sweet but she often errs into the talk about it/hug it out mindset, as if everything is forgivable given enough time - and in my entirely unprofessional opinion, that's rubbish. Some hurts last forever.

On that note, Lunar's under no obligation to be okay with Earth befriending Eclipse. I'm not really sure what she expected, to be honest? I'd be seething if I was Lunar. There's too much bad blood there.

But that doesn't grant Lunar free rein to flagrantly and callously ignore everyone else's problems, and then violently lash out when critiqued. He'd go apeshit if someone did that to him.

Lunar cut Nexus out of his life with zero hesitation when he disrespected Earth. The parallels are pretty stark.

Essay over - thank you again for the ask, and I hope this comes across as conversational and non-hostile as possible. Have a good day!

[dontyouworrydaddy]

Konig and 141 boys developing a crush on their cute and sweet neighbor who also agreed to take care of their place while deployed. Will they act on their crush or try to ignore their feelings? Thank you kindly :)

ℐ𝓉 𝒽𝓊𝓇𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊. ℬ𝓊𝓉 ℐ 𝓈𝓉𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊.

Task Force 141 (+ König) x gn! reader

Oh my god… I got so many ideas and I literally don’t know how to put them ALL into one short fanfic but I‘ll try me best😭😭 I hope you enjoy, love you!!!🩷🩷🩷🩷

(Also I‘m sorry I‘m posting this so late because I was too focused on Simons part because hello? This man has been through so much and I had so many ideas on how to write his part. I literally wrote like 4 and deleted them all because I always found something that would fit more😭)

┕━━━━ ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ━━━━┙

König

You could ask anyone around the area about König and every single one of them would say that he is socially awkward or they don’t know since they never talked to him. But you never believed in any of those. You were trying to build a friendship with him and he is more shocked about the fact you want to build a connection with a masked man, like it’s the most usual thing in this world. But little did you know that König slowly developed a little crush on you whenever you were there and just looked so unbelievable.

It’s been months now and König's admiration for you only grew stronger. Your kindness and selflessness had left an indelible mark on his heart. Every time you visited his place to take care of things, he found himself longing to spend more time in your company.

Unbeknownst to König, you had also noticed his quiet affections. Your intuition told you that he was too timid to make the first move, so you decided to take matters into your own hands. With a mischievous smile, you approached König one day, ready to play the role of matchmaker.

"Hey, König," you said, your voice filled with warmth, "I've noticed how much you appreciate my help with your place. How about we grab a cup of coffee sometime? I'd love to get to know you better."

König's eyes widened in surprise, his cheeks flushed with a mix of excitement and gratitude. He stammered, searching for the right words to express his thankfulness.

"Y-You... You really mean it?" he managed to say, his voice filled with genuine surprise.

You nodded, a playful glint in your eyes. "Of course! It's the least I can do for a neighbor as sweet as you."

A smile broke across König's face, radiant and relieved. "I... I would be honored. Thank you for taking the initiative, You."

And so, the two of you ventured into the world of possibilities, sharing laughter and stories over cups of coffee. With each passing moment, König's shyness faded away, replaced by a blossoming confidence that was fueled by your unwavering support and understanding.

As your connection deepened, König found solace in your presence, a sanctuary where he could be himself without reservation. Your kindness and care melted away the barriers he had built around his heart, allowing love to seep in and flourish.

And in the quiet moments shared between you, König expressed his gratitude for your boldness, for taking a chance on him when he couldn't muster the courage himself. He marveled at the beauty of fate's intervention, realizing that sometimes, the greatest love stories are born out of the selfless actions of others.

As König wrapped his arms around you, his heart overflowing with appreciation, he whispered, "Thank you for seeing the real me, for showing me that sometimes, it's okay to let someone else take the lead. With you, I've found a love that transcends boundaries, and I'm eternally grateful."

In that embrace, you knew that you had made the right choice, that your leap of faith had led you to a love that was worth every ounce of effort. Together, you embarked on a journey of companionship, supporting each other through the highs and lows, cherishing the bond that grew stronger with each passing day.

Simon Riley

Simon was a very cold man who didn’t like to socialize. But when you moved it next door, you kept annoying him with cookies and cake. He never understood why you were doing these things but he slowly let himself enjoy the things you bake for him. You were smiling at him whenever he went on a run. You always sit on the balcony and you looked so pretty that he once almost ran into a car. He got embarrassed but he was relieved you didn’t see it. And every time he caught a glimpse of your warm smile or heard the sound of your laughter, his heart skipped a beat.

As Simon prepared for another deployment, he approached you, hoping to find someone trustworthy to look after his place while he was away. Since he didn’t trust anyone in this area to do it so, he always came back to a messy apartment and he usually cleans it before he gets deployed again. To his relief, you gladly agreed, your genuine kindness shining through. It was in those moments of conversation and connection that Simon began to realize there was something special about you.

But as his feelings for you grew, so did his fear of rejection. Simon was known for his bravery on the battlefield, found himself paralyzed by the vulnerability of his emotions. He watched you from a distance, yearning to take that leap of faith but unsure of how to approach you.

It’s been months and simon's heartache intensified. He longed for your presence, the sound of your voice, and the warmth of your touch. The thought of you taking care of his place while he was away brought him a sense of comfort, yet he was still scared. He was scared that you might hurt him. He is scared that you will leave as soon as you see the real him.

But on one evening, as the setting sun cast a golden glow across the horizon, Simon mustered the courage to strike up a conversation.

“Listen, you don’t have to do this. I mean, I couldn’t give you anything back as a thank you." his voice cold yet so soft towards you. You looked confused and Simon could tell that you were thinking about something. And he was desperate to find out what you’re thinking about, but would that scare you away?

"Simon… I‘m more than okay with doing this. If you want to thank me than tell me more about yourself" your answer completely left him silent and for a moment he couldn’t believe that you exist. How can someone so beautiful and sweet talk to him. He doesn’t even show his face yet alone a single part of his body. You don’t know how he looks like nor do you know how his arms even look like. Yet you’re here interested in him and he couldn’t help but feel his heart jump out of his chest and run towards you.

But it took him 9 months to finally open up. He came to your apartment and you greeted him with tea, his favorite one. You saw how much he loves tea and decided to surprise him with tea back. Ans he felt so safe in your apartment. It felt like his demons were waiting in front of your apartment because even they were shy around you. Not even they couldn’t bare to hurt you.

He started telling you a bit about himself but he kept it above the surface. He doesn’t want to scare you away. Not after he just got used to your presence. The way you talk, the way you smile at him. He would gladly give his own life so you could smile forever.

To his surprise, you listened with unwavering attention, your eyes filled with empathy and understanding. "I’m so proud of you for opening up, Simon. Thank you for telling me" your words carried a soothing melody that calmed the storms within him. The walls he had built around his heart began to crumble, brick by brick, as you reached out and touched his hand gently.

In that moment, Simon let you in, allowing you to slowly weave your way into the depths of his heart. He marveled at the strength and tenderness you possessed, the way you accepted him without judgment or reservation. And with each passing day, his affection for you grew, the boundaries between friendship and something more becoming blurred.

Finally, the day of Simon's departure arrived. He stood before you, his eyes locked with yours, searching for the words to convey the love that had taken root within him. As time ticked away, he leaned in, his heart pounding, and pressed a tender kiss against your lips, through the thin mask.

You smiled, a knowing smile that spoke volumes. It was a silent agreement, a promise of a future yet to unfold. The kiss held the weight of unspoken emotions, of longing and hope. It was a kiss, filled with the anticipation of what the future held for both of you.

As Simon boarded the plane, he carried your smile, your warmth, and the promise of a love yet to fully bloom within his heart. And in that moment, he knew that no matter the distance or the trials they faced, you would always be with him, guiding him through the darkness, and reminding him that love had the power to heal even the deepest wounds.

See you next time, his heart whispered, knowing that the next chapter of their love story would be written when he returned.

John MacTavish

John found himself in a neighborhood far from the battlegrounds he was accustomed to. It was there that he discovered a small haven of peace in the form of a cute and sweet neighbor, the one who had graciously agreed to take care of his place while he was deployed. It was funny because you were asking him about something and behind him, you saw how messy his apartment was so you offered to help him and he gladly agreed.

John couldn't help but find himself drawn to you. Your kind nature, infectious smile and the way you cared for his home with such dedication warmed his heart. He discovered himself longing for the moments when he could steal glances of you from his window or engage in friendly conversations over the fence.

But as much as he admired you from afar, John couldn't shake the nagging feeling that he wanted more than just a neighborly relationship. He yearned for something deeper, something that would bridge the gap between friendship and romance.

It took him a year. A year of battling his own emotions and building up the courage to confess his feelings. The weight of his unspoken words felt heavy on his shoulders, threatening to consume him. He knew he couldn't keep this secret any longer.

One evening, as the sun began to set, John found himself standing at your doorstep, his heart racing in his chest. With a deep breath, he knocked, hoping that the words he had rehearsed countless times in his mind would find their way to his lips.

When you opened the door, a mixture of surprise and curiosity evident in your eyes, John's words spilled out, tinged with vulnerability and sincerity. He confessed how your kindness had captured his heart, how your presence brought light to his world, even in the darkest of times.

To his relief and joy, your smile widened, and a blush colored your cheeks. “Finally, John. I’ve been waiting for this moment and now you did it. I like you a lot, too" The connection you both shared was undeniable and it was clear that fate had brought you together.

And so, in that moment, under the fading daylight, John and you embarked on a journey of love and companionship. What started as a neighborly arrangement blossomed into something more profound and beautiful.

John Price

In a quaint neighborhood, nestled amidst the chaos of life, John found himself drawn to the captivating presence of a neighbor unlike any other. You had captured his attention with your gentle nature and kind heart. Little did you know, he admired you from afar, silently cherishing every encounter and longing for the day he could express his feelings.

As fate would have it, duty called John away, requiring him to deploy on a mission that demanded his undivided attention. In his absence, he entrusted you with the care of his home, knowing that your presence would bring warmth and life to the empty space he left behind.

From a distance, John observed your daily routines, captivated by the grace with which you carried yourself. He found solace in the thought of you gracing his doorstep, bringing life and cheer to the once-silent house. Your visits to tend to his place became a bittersweet pleasure for him, as he admired your kindness and dedication.

Each day, as he watched you through the window or caught glimpses of you leaving his home, his heart would flutter with a mix of emotions. The sight of you brought him both joy and longing, a conflict he struggled to reconcile. Yet, he remained silent, never having the courage to confess his feelings.

Months passed, and John's deployment came to an end. He returned home, ready to step back into the familiar routine of his life. But something had changed. The connection he felt with you had evolved, matured into a deep and profound affection that now haunted his every thought.

Still John remained silent, unsure of how to bridge the gap that had grown between them. He watched as you continued with your life, unaware of the impact you had on him. It pained him to witness your happiness from a distance, knowing he could never be a part of it.

Months passed until the opportunity for love slipped through John's fingers. You never knew the depth of his feelings and he, burdened by his own fears and insecurities, couldn't find the words to express them.

But life moves forward, even in the face of unrequited love. And as time carried on, John found solace in the memories of your brief encounters and the love he had silently harbored. Though he never had the chance to call you his own, he cherished the moments he shared with you, even if they were only from afar.

John remained the silent observer, his heart forever touched by the presence of the sweet and kind neighbor who had unknowingly stolen his heart. In the quiet corners of his mind, he carried the love he never confessed, forever cherishing the memory of you.

Kyle Garrick

In the bustling neighborhood where Kyle resided, a newfound sense of warmth and happiness began to flourish. As fate would have it, his charming and sweet neighbor, the one who agreed to keep an eye on his place while he was deployed, had captured his heart.

You had a way of brightening Kyle's day with just a smile or a kind gesture. Your presence brought a sense of tranquility to his world, a respite from the chaos and turmoil that often accompanied his line of work.

In the beginning, Kyle found himself stealing glances at you from across the street, admiring the way your laughter danced on the breeze and the gentleness that radiated from your every action. He couldn't deny the growing attraction that pulled at his heartstrings, urging him to take a chance.

After a month of wrestling with his feelings, Kyle finally mustered the courage to confess his emotions to you. It was a nerve-wracking moment, his heart pounding in his chest as he stood before you, vulnerability etched across his face.

With shaky breath, he poured his heart out "I like you, Y/N. A lot. More than words could ever describe it and I plan on sharing my life with you.I couldn’t take my eyes off of you the day you came and offered me those stupid cookies. And then I wanted you close but not in a scary way… So I asked you to look after my place while I‘m gone. And now I want you to be here when I‘m coming home." And as he finished speaking, a nervous silence filled the air. Kyle's gaze met yours, searching for any sign of reciprocation. And then, a smile graced your lips, your eyes sparkling with affection.

"You…" you said, your voice soft and full of sincerity, "have no idea how long I've been hoping you'd say something. I've had a crush on you since the day we met."

Relief and joy flooded Kyle's being, his heart soaring with happiness. In that moment, he knew that his decision to take a leap of faith had been rewarded in the most beautiful way.

From that day forward, Kyle and you embarked on the sweetest and most adorable relationship. Your days were filled with laughter, stolen glances, and tender moments. Whether it was cozy evenings spent on the couch, sharing stories and dreams, or exploring the neighborhood hand in hand, every experience was infused with the magic of love.

And it was thanks to you agreeing on watching over his place.

[nightwriter357]

Smosh Summer Games: ships 7

The long awaited part 7(out of 10 prob). This part contains smut(18+) and fluff and everything in-between. Im really exited about the final parts and I hope I have the time and energy to give you guys a fun video/song as a thank you for all the wonderfull support. If there's anything you really want to see in these final parts, just let me know and I will make if happen.

xxxxxx

Part 7: Welcome back to me SCREAMING

You and Damien returned to your room, still dripping from your spontaneous dive into the pool. Even though you had borrowed some towels, the water clung stubbornly to your skin and clothes. As soon as you stepped inside, you both started laughing at how soaked you were, the wet fabric making every movement a little more difficult.

"This is ridiculous," you chuckled, trying to peel off your shirt, which clung to you like a second skin. "We're the two biggest idiots ever."

Damien grinned, struggling with his own clothes. "I thought you said the glasses made me look smart?"

"No, I said they made you look sexy," you corrected, giving him a playful look. "And I have to say, the wet librarian look is really doing it for me."

Damien's eyes darkened slightly at your words, and before you knew it, he was stepping closer, his hands finally free of his drenched shirt. "Oh, really?" he murmured, his voice low and teasing.

As you finally managed to peel off the last of your wet clothes, you stood there, both of you in nothing but your underwear, damp hair clinging to your skin. The playful energy lingered, but there was something else too-an unspoken question hanging between you, one that neither of you seemed ready to fully address.

"I don't know how long we're going to be able to keep this a secret," you said softly, your eyes meeting his. You were still smiling, but the underlying concern was clear in your voice.

Damien sighed, his eyes searching yours for a moment, as if he was trying to gauge how serious you were. "Well, I mean, there are only two nights left, right? We can manage that."

His words made your heart sink a little, even though you tried to ignore the feeling. Only two nights left? Is that really all this is to him? You wondered, but you couldn't bring yourself to ask. Instead, you nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, you're right," you agreed, though a part of you didn't want to think about this ending. The idea that this might be temporary, that it might not mean as much to him as it did to you, made your stomach twist with uncertainty.

You tried to brush off the thought, focusing instead on the practical side of things. "I mean, what we're doing-this sort of friends-with-benefits, fuck buddy thing-should probably end when we get back. Like, we're friends, right?"

There was a brief pause, and you could see the same uncertainty reflected in Damien's eyes, but he quickly masked it with a nod. "Yeah," he said, his voice quieter now. "This probably isn't worth it in the long haul for two friends."

His words hung in the air, and you could tell neither of you fully believed them. But admitting that out loud felt too risky, too vulnerable. Instead, you both clung to the idea that this was just a temporary fling, something that could easily be left behind once the trip was over.

You shared a small, almost hesitant smile, and then turned your attention to getting dressed. As you slipped into fresh clothes, you couldn't help but glance at Damien, wondering what he was really thinking.

Once you were both dressed, you looked at him, trying to sound casual. "Ready to go up?"

He hesitated, running a hand through his damp hair. "You go ahead. I'll hang back for a bit."

You nodded, trying not to let the disappointment show on your face. "Okay," you said, managing a small smile. "I'll see you up there."

As you left the room and headed toward the lounge, your thoughts were a jumbled mess. You needed to talk to someone about this, someone who could help you make sense of it all. And that someone was Courtney.

When you arrived at the lounge, you found Courtney chatting with Arasha. The moment she saw you, her eyes lit up, and you could tell she was already curious about what had been going on.

"Hey," you said, trying to sound casual. "Can I borrow you for a sec?"

Courtney raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. "Sure," she said, following you out of the lounge. As you passed by Arasha, she gave you a suspicious, almost knowing look, but didn't say anything.

Once you were a little ways down the hallway, out of earshot of everyone else, Courtney turned to you with a grin. "Okay, spill. What's going on?"

You took a deep breath, your heart racing. "So, don't freak out, okay?"

Courtney's grin only widened. "I never do."

You glanced around to make sure no one was listening, then blurted out, "We had sex."

Her eyes went wide, and for a moment, she just stared at you in shock. "Oh my god, shut the fuck up! You had sex? Like, sex sex? With Damien?"

You nodded, feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety. "Yeah, with Damien."

Courtney let out a loud, exaggerated gasp. "I knew it! I freaking knew it! You two have been all over each other this whole trip. Tell me everything!"

You couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm, some of your tension easing. "There's not much to tell. It just... happened."

"Oh, please," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "You can't just 'it just happened' me! How was it? Was it amazing? Was he good?"

You felt your cheeks heat up, but you couldn't stop the smile spreading across your face. "It was... really good."

Courtney let out a squeal of excitement. "I knew it! I just knew it! You two have so much chemistry, it was only a matter of time. So, what now? Are you guys, like, a thing?"

You hesitated, the reality of the situation crashing back down on you. "I don't know. We said it's just for the trip, but..."

"But?" Courtney prompted, leaning in closer.

"But I don't know if I want that," you admitted, finally voicing the thoughts that had been swirling in your mind all morning.

Courtney gave you a sympathetic look, her earlier excitement softening into something more understanding. "Hey, whatever happens, just know I'm here for you, okay? Whether it's just a fling or something more, I've got your back."

"Thanks, Court," you said, feeling a little better after talking to her, " and Thanks for not freaking out."

"No problem," she said with a grin. "And seriously, if you need anything,  you know where to find me."

As you both headed back toward the lounge, you couldn't help but feel a little lighter. There were still so many unanswered questions, but at least you had someone to talk it over with now.

Entering, you noticed the room was abuzz with energy. Damien was now standing among the group. He caught your eye, and a friendly smirk crossed his face. Spencer stood at the front, holding the bowl of ice with a wicked grin as you all gathered and the cameras started recordning. "Alright, everyone, welcome to Netflix and Chill, the game where I give you the world's worst movie descriptions, and you have to guess what movie I'm talking about. Guess it right, and you're safe. Guess it wrong, and, well... you're about to get real friendly with some ice cubes. And since this is the Smosh Summer Games edition, all the movies are ocean or ship-themed!"

The teams cheered, and you caught Damien's eye as he leaned in and whispered, "Think we'll make it through this without freezing?"

You smirked. "If Shayne doesn't blow it for us."

Shayne, overhearing, gave a dramatic gasp. "Hey! Just because I always lose..."

Courtney patted Shayne's shoulder. "It's okay, buddy. Maybe today's the day."

Spencer pulled out the first description, reading aloud: "Alright, first one: 'A man witnesses his wife die, and his son gets disabled after a brutal attack. Years later, his son is kidnapped, and he has to travel across the ocean with a bunch of strangers to find him.'"

Shayne's eyes widened, and he jumped up with enthusiasm. "Oh! Finding Nemo! Oh my god, I actually got one right!" His celebration was over the top as he danced around, high-fiving everyone on the Peg-Leggers.

Courtney laughed. "Miracles do happen."

Spencer gave Shayne a sarcastic slow clap. "Alright, Shayne got it. Next up, for the Seamen: 'A bureaucrat ruins a peaceful summer vacation by getting a bunch of people eaten on a holiday weekend.'"

Keith blinked, looking lost. "Uh... Jaws?"

"Correct!" Spencer grinned, and the Seamen cheered loudly as Keith did a small victory dance, clearly proud.

Next, it was your turn. Spencer's mischievous smile set off a wave of nerves. "Okay, Y/N, let's see if you get this one: 'A cheating woman narrowly escapes punishment, but every man in her life dies. Oh, and she destroys an irreplaceable treasure on her way out.'"

You couldn't help but grin. "That's Titanic!"

Damien gave you a congratulatory nudge as the Peg-Leggers erupted in cheers, and you flashed a smile back at him. "Still no ice for us."

Spencer carried on with another description. "Alright, Seamen, your turn: 'A bunch of tourists go on a cruise, but the captain loses his glasses and accidentally lands them on the worst island ever. Dinosaurs may or may not be involved.'"

Angela thought hard before blurting, "Jurassic Park: The Lost World?"

"Correct again!" Spencer declared, and the Seamen team cheered loudly, Noah wiping his brow in relief as Trevor shouted, "Saved by the dinosaurs!"

More rounds continued with everyone taking their turns, laughter filling the room as ice cubes were poured into pants after wrong guesses. The Peg-Leggers celebrated every win with high energy, cheering and teasing each other along the way. Shayne, still hyped from his early success, declared, "we're on a roll!"

When the final round came, both teams were tied, and Spencer set the stage for the deciding moment. "Okay, Peg-Leggers, here's your last chance: 'A bunch of people dance on a sinking boat, but there's a lot of singing, and it's not actually sinking—it's floating underwater with a crab playing the drums.'"

You and Damien exchanged a look, both of you thinking hard. Before you could say anything, Courtney guessed, "The Little Mermaid?"

"YES!" Spencer yelled, and your entire team burst into wild celebration. 

Ian and Anthony stepped forward with the scoreboard, and Ian announced dramatically, "And with that win, the Peg-Leggers bring it to a tie! The Summer Games score is now 2-2!"

Without thinking, you jumped into Damien's arms, and he caught you mid-air, spinning you around as your laughter echoed through the room. But as you pulled away, you realized everyone was staring. Shayne and Courtney exchanged knowing smirks, while Arasha just gave you a raised eyebrow, looking like she knew way more than you thought.

Trying to play it off, you both laughed awkwardly, but the tension between you lingered.

The dining area was alive with chatter and laughter as everyone settled in for dinner. Plates were piled high with food, and the conversation flowed as freely as the drinks. As the day wound down, the atmosphere on the ship was light and playful. Plates were cleared and everyone relaxed, enjoying the end of a lively day.

Ian, served the last of the food with a flourish. "Okay, last call for seconds! Don't be shy, we've got plenty."

"Or at least, I hope so," Courtney teased, grabbing a generous helping. "We don't want another 'experiment' gone wrong."

Shayne laughed, shaking his head. "Yeah, we don't need any more culinary disasters."

Amanda, slightly tipsy, clinked her glass with Trevor's. "Here's to me not making any more smoothies!"

Trevor grinned, nodding in agreement. "And me not being covered in fruit anymore."

Tommy leaned in, a mischievous glint in his eye. "So, it was you Amanda?"

Amanda rolled her eyes but smiled. "Yeah okay I ruined Trevors look but I'm not responseble for whatever happend to Spencers robe ."

Arasha, cut in. "So we have one accidental and one premeditated fashion assasination."

The group burst into laughter, remembering Spencer's latest costume debacle. "Oh, please," Chanse said, rolling his eyes. "I don't even want to talk about that robe."

"Hey, it's a bold fashion statement," Spencer defended, walking in with a mock-serious expression. "And clearly, everyone loves it."

Amanda leaned over to Shayne, "So hot"

As the lively dinner conversation continued, Damien leaned in close to you, his voice a low murmur. "How about we step outside for a bit? Get some fresh air?"

You glanced around the cabin, catching the eye of the others who were deep in conversation or laughing over a shared joke. "Sounds perfect," you agreed, smiling up at him.

Standing up, you both addressed the group. "We're going to head out for a bit," you said, your tone cheerful. "Just need some fresh air. We'll be back soon."

"No worries," Shayne called out, waving a hand casually. "Enjoy the night!"

Amanda gave a thumbs-up. "Catch you later!"

With one last glance around, you and Damien made your way to the deck, ready to enjoy the quiet night air together. The chatter of your friends gradually faded as you and damien stepped out on the deck, leaving you both alone under the stars.

You leaned against the railing, taking in the gentle sway of the boat and the shimmering reflections on the water. The night air was cool and refreshing, a stark contrast to the heat from earlier in the day. Damien joined you at the railing, his presence both comforting and bittersweet.

"It's hard to believe this might be the last night we have together like this," you said, looking out at the endless expanse of water.

Damien nodded, his expression thoughtful. "Yeah, with the wrap party tomorrow, it feels like everything is winding down."

There was a pause, and you thought you could sense the unspoken emotions between you. "I'm really glad we had this time," you said softly. "It's been... memorable."

Damien's gaze met yours, a small, sad smile on his lips. "Yeah, it has. I've enjoyed every moment , lover."

The boat rocked gently, and the sounds of the night seemed to create a cocoon around the two of you. Damien reached out and took your hand, his touch was warm and reassuring. "How about we make the most of tonight?"

You squeezed his hand, feeling a mixture of exitment and melancholy. "I'd like that, lover."

As you re-entered the diningroom, you saw that the group was still scattered around, some engaged in quiet conversations and others winding down.

"Hey everyone," you called out, drawing a few sleepy smiles. "We're heading to bed. Goodnight!"

Damien echoed your sentiment with a warm smile. "Goodnight, all. See you in the morning."

Courtney, with a playful grin, raised her glass. "Sweet dreams, you two!"

Tommy nodded, stretching. "Yeah, have a good one. We'll hold down the fort."

The others offered their goodnights as you and Damien made your way to your room, the intimate atmosphere of the night drawing you closer. The door closed behind you, and the quiet of the cabin enveloped you both. You glanced at each other, a shared understanding passing between you.

Damien pulled you gently into his arms, his lips finding yours in a tender kiss. The kiss deepened, and you both felt the intensity of the moment, knowing it might be your last night together in this way. The passion between you grew, each touch and caress speaking of the connection you had forged over the trip.

His gaze locked onto yours with an intensity that felt almost unsettling, as if he could see right through you. You felt exposed, as though he could read your deepest thoughts, yet you couldn't pull away. His eyes spoke volumes, and you could sense how your own gaze was just as compelling for him. His hands traced your thighs softly, moving up to your hips and drawing you closer.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He smiled softly, his hands caressing your thighs gently. "Because you're captivating," he murmured.

His hands moved up over your hips, pulling you closer. He slowly lifted one hand, trailing it over your stomach, grazing past one breast, and continuing up to your neck. His fingertips traced lightly along your neck, moving to the back of your head. He took a firm grip behind your neck, drawing you closer, letting his lips barely brush against yours.

"Damien..." you breathed, feeling his warm breath on your skin.

You felt his breath on your skin as he slowly moved his lips along your jaw, kissing your neck and sending a shiver down your spine. His tongue explored your neck, moving down to your shoulders and then back up again. Your clothes pratically falling of off your body as you kissed again. Your hands moved over to remove his clothes while your eyes met him, and a healy breth escaped your lips.

"You're incredible," he murmured, his breath warm against your skin.

You responded with a soft sigh, leaning into his touch. "I've missed this," you whispered.

He nipped gently at your neck, his breathing heavier than before. You felt him start to explore more confidently, his touch becoming more deliberate. He moved his hand down over your stomach, past your waist, and you could feel his excitement growing.

"I want to make this night unforgettable," he said softly, his voice filled with a mix of tenderness and desire.

You nodded, your eyes meeting his with a mix of anticipation and longing. "It will be," you whispered back, your heart racing with the weight of this being your last time together like this.

Damien's touch was electric, each caress a testament to his desire and care. He guided you gently onto the bed, his eyes filled with an intensity that made your heart race. You could feel the heat of his body radiating, as his fingers traced a path of fire along your skin.

He looked at you, his gaze unwavering, as he helped you position yourself above him. "So, one last time?" he asked, his voice low and thick with anticipation. His breath was warm against your ear, making you shiver with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

You nodded, your voice a breathy whisper. "Yes, Damien. I need you."

His hands moved with a slow, deliberate grace as he guided you onto him. You could feel the growing pressure of his arousal pressing against your core, the anticipation almost unbearable. With a deep breath, you slowly lowered yourself onto him, the sensation of his thickness stretching you out making you gasp.

Damien's eyes were locked onto yours, a look of awe and admiration in his gaze as he felt you envelop him. His hands rested on your hips, guiding you gently as you began to move. "You feel incredible," he murmured, his voice laced with a mix of wonder and desire. "This is perfect."

The sensation of him inside you was intense, each thrust sending waves of pleasure through your body. You could feel yourself tightening around him with every movement, the fullness and stretch making you moan with a mix of pleasure and relief. Damien's grip on your hips was firm but gentle, his hands guiding you as you rode him with increasing urgency.

His touch was tender yet insistent, his fingers caressing your back as he pulled you closer to him. His lips brushed against your neck, each kiss a promise of the passion that still burned between you. "I want you so much," he whispered, his breath warm against your skin. "I'll never forget how good you feel around  me."

The intensity of his thrusts and the pressure of his body against yours made you feel almost overwhelmed. You bit down on his shoulder, trying to stifle the cries that threatened to escape. Every thrust, every touch was a delicate dance between pleasure and desperation, and you could feel the overwhelming pleasure building inside you.

Damien's movements were steady and deliberate, his eyes never leaving yours. "Fuck, You're doing so good," he murmured, his voice filled with admiration. "I wish I could hear you scream for me."

The urgency in his voice only heightened your pleasure. Each thrust made you clench around him, your moans growing louder and more desperate. The overwhelming sensation made it hard to think, your body driven by a primal need that left you gasping and trembling. "I'm gonna cum Damien, I can't.." you managed to get out.

As you neared your climax, Damien's gaze locked onto yours with a fierce intensity. "Look at me please," he urged, his voice both tender and commanding. "I want to see you come apart for me. Don't hide from me."

You forced your eyes open, meeting his gaze through the haze of pleasure. His eyes were filled with a desperate longing that mirrored your own, a connection so profound it left you breathless. His hands cupped your face, guiding your eyes to his as he continued to thrust into you with a steady rhythm.

The wave of pleasure finally crashed over you, your body tightening and trembling as you reached the peak and his name left you lips. The moans that escaped you were raw and unrestrained, your entire being consumed by the intensity of the moment. Damien's grip on your hips tightened as he thrust into you with a final, desperate fervor, his own release following closely behind.

In the aftermath, you both lay there, breathless and sated. Damien's fingers gently caressed your back, his touch soft and tender as he brushed a stray lock of hair from your face. His eyes were filled with a mix of satisfaction and affection, the intensity of the night reflected in every touch and kiss.

"Wow, well I'll never forget this," he murmured, his voice a soft whisper against your skin.

You smiled, your heart full and content. "I couldn't if I tried," you whispered back, before the relaization hit that you'd never be this close to him again.

You looked up at Damien, "Do you think we can have another last time tonight?"

He shuckled, " give me a minute, okay"

You smiled at him before resting your head on his chest, "I'll give you two."

[sepublic]

            It’s wild to me that the storyboards for Watching and Dreaming depict Odalia taking Camila’s place during this scene, and at a notable distance from the kids here, no less…

         It really makes me wonder if the original plan was for Odalia to use the light glyph to awaken the kids from their puppet states, hence the setup of her being in the Archives as the Collector’s servant. She would’ve helped the kids save the people of the Demon Realm, perhaps realizing that her way of life was simply unsustainable, and that she contributed to Belos possessing the Boiling Isles as both knowing bystander and supporter.

         They’d ultimately succeed, but Odalia being at a distance from the kids implies that they don’t ever forgive her; They won’t go out of their way to kill Odalia, nor keep her from improving as a person. But they don’t owe her personal forgiveness, which I appreciate. We may still have some variation of this scene where Amity reunites with Alador;

        Odalia may or may not be salty, but it still reminds the viewer that even after all that, Amity rightfully doesn’t forgive Odalia, and chooses Alador; While Odalia is visibly upset, but can’t do anything about this but just maintain distance and accept it (Hence why she looks so awkward and closed-off, compared to Camila rejoicing with the kids in the final product).

         That makes me wonder if we would’ve seen her in the epilogue, with the group shot depicting Odalia notably isolated from the rest of her family, instead besides Tibbles or something like that, as redeemed capitalists (maybe we should put her at the top left). Her redemption IS accepted, but not by her family members, who still maintain a distance;

         Odalia improving herself could also be a way to emphasize one of the themes of the finale; That people can and should be allowed to change, but also they must choose to do so for themselves. Having Odalia be a contrast to Belos would’ve further hammered in that idea; They’re both detested by the fandom as abusive, controlling parents who mold their kids into the image of someone else, are complicit in the same genocide (to varying degrees), represent a particular real-world social ill, etc. Both claim to act on behalf of their families, but it’s clear they’re actually just self-interested.

         These parallels highlight that the main difference between these two, why Belos is killed unmourned while Odalia has hopes for a brighter future, is that Odalia actually chose to change. It’s Restorative VS Retributive Justice taken to its natural conclusion; The fact that Odalia is much younger, and thus has turned down far less chances to turn back, also contributes to why she’s actually willing to change, as she hasn’t doubled down the same way Belos did, while still being guilty of some heinous things (Note that Blight Industries, as an arms manufacturer, always got its wealth off of the expectation that others will be hurt and even killed; It’s blood money).

         It may also add to the Collector’s story; They’ve failed to redeem Belos, so it’d be easy to believe that their compassion is an inherent mistake, as is giving others a chance, the agency to decide for themselves, etc. So when Luz reassures the Collector that they DID do good… Well, they end up going to the Archives to prevent it from collapsing. And THAT leads to the Collector potentially seeing Odalia, maybe being wary after what happened with Belos (Odalia and Belos are both adults who sought to exploit the Collector for their own ends)…

         But the Collector doesn’t let Belos ruin their compassion and accepts Odalia’s change, even if they personally may not forgive her (They have less of a past with Odalia than the other kids, so it’s not as unlikely). Just as Gus felt like his kindness was taken advantage of, only to be reminded afterwards that it’s still worth it in the end when Hunter does reciprocate, we could’ve gotten something like that with the Collector and Odalia.

         And on another note, I also wonder if this was the writers’ way of addressing criticisms regarding how Odalia was handled in Clouds on the Horizon, by providing a sympathetic side to her character as compensation; We’re reminded in the episode right after that Eda still remembers her as a stand-offish friend and not an Evil Child, instead of the writers doubling down by excluding Odalia from that flashback. Eda thinks she’s about to die here, but the memory of who Odalia once was is included to comfort her alongside other childhood companions, reminding us she wasn’t always like this and isn’t pure evil (not without working to become that at least).

         But by the end of the day, it seems the writers opted to exchange Odalia’s role for Camila having more of a story in the finale, and tbh… I think that’s the right call, I agree with them there. This is the series finale to a show that’s ultimately about Luz, our main protagonist, and it’s why the finale places particular emphasis on Luz, and her relationship with her fellow main protagonists Eda and King. If they did take the Odalia route, I think we still would’ve seen Camila reunite with Luz at the Owl House, meet Eda and King, etc. But…

         Camila is Luz’s mother, and their relationship is the inciting, beginning incident of the series. To see it all start because Camila was worried for her daughter, only to finally encounter a worst-case scenario with Luz despite everything she did to improve… and emphasizing her reaction to it, how Camila handles herself, picks herself up because as much as it hurts, she’s got other kids to look after? Just as Camila picked herself up after Manny’s death for Luz’s sake? Or kept herself strong in Yesterday’s Lie for Vee? Good stuff.

         It wraps up Camila’s storyline more nicely, as someone whom we began the series with Luz; Camila is more important than Odalia, so I don’t blame the writers at all for prioritizing her. Odalia having a redemption of sorts likely would’ve felt too rushed, and while she contributes to the narrative of Belos, the Collector, and Amity, Camila contributes to Luz’s story and thus takes precedent, especially at this point in the story.

        Especially since some have criticized TOH’s handling of characters of color; The crew has shown themselves responsive to these points, hence Luz and Camila’s hair changing in S3. So I wouldn’t be surprised if the criticism of white characters being prioritized over PoC stuck, and contributed to them having Odalia get shafted for Camila, rather than the other way around. It’s not perfect (an ideal situation in terms of budget and/or writing would’ve had both), but it does show a willingness to listen and actually respond to criticism, which I appreciate.

        So in the end, the kids are awakened from their puppet states, not by a conscious Odalia who isn’t transformed and stumbles across the light glyph, but because like Camila, Amity is able to muster enough emotional will over her love of Luz to barely nudge her finger... just enough to tap the light glyph and activate it, freeing herself! The kids go out of their way to free Camila for help, and we get to reap the rewards of Camila’s development in how she copes with her daughter’s death, when fear for Luz was what incited the series and led to a less-than-ideal handling of the situation.

         Camila gets to guide the kids with glyphs like her daughter does, showing an engagement with the isles after being apprehensive in the previous episode; And a connection to Luz, who has the Titan’s magic and is powering these spells… Camila is unwittingly calling upon her daughter for help and Luz is answering! And when it’s done, Camila gets to stand by the kids and not at a distance, because they love and accept her for having always been a good mother to them.