#being understood yourself and it’s fucking scary but it’s so worth it to let that fear go and just let yourself love someone else who makes

[jackactuallywrites]

LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN

let's say there's like a little get together with people from the base in a pub, MC is DOWN BAD for ghost, but she's a fucking pussy + ghost is scary + if he'd report her confession to HR it's instant over for shawty + ghost is scary + ghost is scary (and hot) MC is there with her 2 besties obviously and they're drunk and tease the fuck out of MC MC almost goes to talk to Ghost and there's some woman that's already talking to him and MC is like OH 🧍‍���️and that bitch gets CLOSE

MC is like you know what IFEELSICKIHAVEAHEADACHEIMGOINGBACKTOTHEBASE BYE

IMAGINE ✨

YES THIS IS THE LEVEL OF DETAIL I LOVE

Pairing: Simon Ghost Riley x reader

Rating: Mild

Warnings: Drinking and barfing and Liverpudlians 🤢

Summary: You get drunk at the pub and your friends try to convince you to hit on Ghost

Notes: I will be beating the rest of this plot out of @xxven 😌 (also if you want to make a request make it this specific it’s perfect)

Word count: 946

The pub was supposed to be a pinnacle of Friday night entertainment. You went down there with your girls, you got a bunch of drinks down your neck, and then you got to what you did best: you sat and checked out what soldiers had come to the pub and ranked them based on their attractiveness. If you were lucky, you might get off with one in the alleyway behind the pub. It stunk of rancid piss and occasionally vomit, and more than once, you’d been spotted by one of your superiors and given guard duty in the midst of your soul-destroying headache as your punishment, not exactly what you’d call romantic, but it was fun.

Tonight, there were other things on your mind.

As usual, there was the typical collection of drunken louts and gorgeous men, a true pick and mix of good and bad, as well as a dream’s selection of women, each one entirely different from the last, yet completely spellbinding in their own way. However, none of those caught your attention. It was the terrifying man at the bar who drew your eye.

Lieutenant Ghost Riley.

Your friends hadn’t understood your attraction to the man initially, citing that how you could ever be attracted to someone if you never saw their face, but you’d pointed out his height, his muscles, the quiet confidence with which he carried himself, and they’d come around. They’d even admitted that there was something sexy about the way that he could be anyone under that mask; whatever they wanted him to be, a perfect blank slate for them to project all of their dreams and desires onto. Of course, the problem for Katy was the reputation that came along with the man, and for Liverpudlian Elle, the fact that he was from Manchester was a complete dealbreaker, but neither of those things had ever bothered you.

“So why don’t you go over and talk to him?” Katy didn’t seem to have any such problem going straight to men and asking for exactly what she wanted, and she expected the same from everyone. You didn’t consider yourself to be entirely socially anxious, but it was Ghost. Anyone with sense was nervous around that man, and you told Katy as much, “-even if you ignore the whole ‘terrifying’ thing, what if he reported me to HR? I could get shipped off to the other side of the world, at best.” Katy considered your words thoughtfully and then walked off, scoffing as she went, “Pussy.” Elle nodded sagely, “She’s right. Stop being chicken and talk to the man. I mean, if I was like that, I never would have gotten off with that fit marine.” You turned up your nose at her, “The married one who gave you the clap?” Elle rolled her eyes at you, “That was the other marine.” You hummed, “Well, God forbid I miss out on opportunities like that.”

A clinking of glasses foretold Katy’s return, a headache’s worth of shot glasses in her hand, and she set them down on the old wooden table. “Either you go and talk to him, or you do four shots.”

It was quite a conundrum for you; either there was going to be a whole lot of puking, or you’d have to drink a bunch of shots. You could see Ghost standing at the bar still, looming over everyone like a spectre, and the idea of going up and talking to him made your insides tense. Four shots was long from what you’d done in your uni days, so you took them one after the other, wincing at that familiar burn down your throat.

If you hadn’t already been several pints in, you might have cottoned onto the fact that Katy and Elle had planned on either outcome: either you would talk to Ghost tipsy, or you would talk to him ten minutes later absolutely sloshed. As it happened, four shots later, you had more than enough drunk courage to speak to the man, though your motor skills were no longer entirely on your side. In fact, it seemed as though the chairs and tables had conspired to get in your way as you tried to make your way to the bar, blocking your way long enough for you to see someone already at Ghost’s side.

You couldn’t see anything of their face, only the beret on their head and brunette hair, their body being just as nondescript and draped in camouflage as the rest of the bodies in the pub, but it was enough. The alcohol had been behaving well enough in your stomach, yet now that you were confronted with having lost your opportunity with Ghost, it was beginning to roil and churn within you, the prickling of acid at the back of your throat. Your only saving grace now was that you knew where the exits were, and you tripped and stumbled over the chairs and legs until you were finally out in the cold open air, your own feet seeming to betray you, and you fell to your knees, your hands on the freezing concrete as you fought to keep control of your stomach. You felt the familiar hand of Katy on your back, gently rubbing as Elle tucked the loose strands of hair out of your face and placed a glass of water in front of you. They had been the instruments of your destruction, yet they were there to save you as well, a delicate balance perfected over years of sisterhood.

“It’ll be okay,” Katy cooed, “he didn’t see.” Elle agreed, “Yeah, nobody saw. This will all be a bad memory soon enough.”

[metize]

Behave.

Rating: Explicit Warnings: Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Yagami Light/Reader Additional Tags: Reader-Insert, Praise Kink, Yagami Light is Kira, L is reader's brother, but no one's supposed to know, Possessive Behavior, Unhealthy Relationships, Blackmail, Coercion, Sexual Coercion, Oral Sex, Rough Oral Sex, 'good girl's, AFAB reader - Freeform, Misogyny, Workplace Sex, Desk Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Vaginal Sex, this is filthy, I'm so sorry, Manipulation, Top Yagami Light, Jealousy

A/N: Filth! Absolute dirt! I'm the Trash Man! I come out, I throw trash all over AO3, and then I start eating garbage! Enjoy.

"You seem to get along very well with L."

You could practically feel your heart stop when Light said that. You felt so stupid, of course, this guy would figure it out. You tried your best to look unfazed while you panicked on the inside. The black-haired detective and you were trying to keep it a secret from the task force that you were siblings. You cursed Ryuzaki internally, he had been acting kind of protective towards you and it was bound to raise suspicion.

“You think so? I’ve just been trying to be on good terms with everyone.” You deflected.

The investigation room was empty save for the two of you, there was a single monitor showing the news broadcast reporting on the most recent Kira murder. You focused back on the files you were sorting through. Your older brother never cared much for organizing and that drove you mad. You glanced in Light’s direction again, he was staring at you, his gaze sent shivers down your spine, you just forced an awkward smile.

"Did you let him fuck you yet?" He deadpanned.

"W-What the fuck? Of course not!" You answered abruptly. You were offended that Light would even ask something like that. The crude way he said it too, made you blush in embarrassment. You found it weird he'd say something like that, usually Light was nothing short of a gentleman when addressing you.

"Don't get coy all of a sudden. Just admit you two are fucking already." He sounded annoyed now. He got up and got closer to your desk, his eyes never leaving yours. You sometimes felt intimidated in his presence, now in the middle of the night, alone with him towering over you, this feeling increased tenfold.

"T-that's disgusting! Why are you even saying that? We're just… we're just friends, coworkers who get along, whatever!" You started to crack under the pressure.

Light brows furrowed for a second and then his eyes widened in revelation. A grin formed on his face and he burst into laughter like he had finally gotten the punchline to a joke. His laughter was scary, loud and almost maniacal.  You didn't know how to react exactly so you looked at him nervously and confused.

Did he believe you? Did he find the misunderstanding funny? Was that it? You hoped that was it. You offered a weak smile as his laughter died down.

"I was so caught up in this… obsession… this feeling of jealousy… ah. It was obvious all along. You're siblings. Siblings!" He shook his head smiling "This is pathetic. You're becoming such a nuisance with your distraction."

He figured it out, of course it had only been a matter of time. But that realization took way too long for his liking. He was blinded by the rage of the idea of L having you and he didn't stop to consider any other possibilities.

"Excuse me? I didn't-" You got up and started to retort his rude comment.

"Shut the fuck up." And you did so out of shock. Light wasn't like this normally, he was relatively courteous and nice. Why was he so… brutish all of a sudden? He smiled at your obedience. "Good girl."

The praise felt so dirty, you frowned at him. Being infantilized was something you were used to dealing with in the workplace, being surrounded by older men. But Light was pretty much your age, what was he thinking?

You didn't have time to wonder because the man grabbed your collar and pulled you into a kiss.

You tried to push him away instinctively and ask what the fuck he was doing, but Light grabbed your wrists. He held them so tightly it almost marked your skin. Your lips were still closed so he bit them to make you part them. He kissed you aggressively as if he was punishing you for something. his tongue entered your mouth deepening the kiss and claiming your mouth for himself.

He tasted like coffee and sin.

"God, and I thought fucking L's girlfriend was a good idea, this is way better." He sounded extremely amused. "I wonder how is he going to react when he finds out I fucked his pretty little sister?"

Ryuzaki had always had a bad feeling about Light, he mentioned you should be careful around him, you knew all that and here you were. You thought he was being overprotective, to be fair Light wasn't the first guy L had a bad feeling about.

Light's hand was now caressing your hair, smiling content with your current predicament and very proud of himself.

"We… w-we can't." You tried to come up with an excuse. "We work together, so it would be-"

"I am Kira."

You heart stopped when you heard those words. Everything started connections in your head, every lead, every tip, every death. You still had many questions, some things didn't make sense, but as you stood there looking at that man's face it was clear that he wasn't joking.

"W-why are you… telling me this?" You tried to back away slowly. You could hear your heartbeat drumming in your ears.

"Because I feel like keeping you to myself." He smiled sinisterly, every step back you took he stepped forward to approach you again "I was contemplating killing you after pounding your cunt, but I told myself I deserved a little treat."

Hearing him talking about murdering you in cold blood activated your flight instinct immediately. You turned away and rushed towards the door, but as soon as you tried to twist the doorknob and open the door, it was locked. You twisted the knob again and again, desperately trying to unlock it with sheer willpower.

“Stop that, you’re smarter than this.” You heard his voice right against your ear, his hands now grabbing your waist and caressing you through the fabric of your blouse. “There’s only one way you leave this room” he placed a kiss on your neck and you shivered despite yourself “with my cum leaking down your thighs” he grabbed your throat suddenly “and invisibly leashed to me, like a good little pet.”

You were shaking, incredibly aware of Light's bulge pressing against your ass, one hand toying with the hem of your shirt and the other still holding your neck possessively.

"Are we clear, pet?"

You felt his grip tighten a bit so you just quickly nodded your head. It showed to be the wrong answer, because you were punished with a sharp swat to your ass.

"Use your damn words, there's a reason I chose not to gag you." He grabbed your face, forcing you to make eye contact with him. "Say 'Yes, master'."

He was a sick fuck. You wanted to scream at him and call him exactly that. You wanted to push him away and go home already. But god damn it, you wanted to survive this.

"Yes… m-master."

He smiled at your obedience and his grin made you sick to your stomach. He placed a kiss on your temple and pat your hair gently.

"There you go, good girl. That wasn't so hard, was it?" He turned you around quickly and pushed your back against the door. His mouth was on yours again, his hands slipped under your shirt and you shivered feeling his cold touch on your skin. The fabric was restraining his hands so he grew frustrated and started to undress you at once.

"Y-you don't… have to do this, Light. I promise I won't tell anyone, just let me go and-"

"Don't waste your breath. You'll need it when I get to choke you properly…" he answered simply, amused by your perseverance, all the while looking forward to breaking it. "I want to fuck you, so I'm going to do it. I have the whole world in my hands and it's not a little pet that's going to deny me what I want. Understood?"

He tossed your shirt on the floor and started pulling your pencil skirt up. He glared at you for not answering and you promptly spoke up.

"Understood."

He smirked. You felt his fingers trace your slit over your panties, you shuddered and instinctively tried to move away.

"Don't fucking move." His other hand grabbed your waist holding you in place. His tone was harsh and you were so fucking scared.

"Sorry"

"I'm sure you are… Good girl, at least you have manners." He chuckled at that. "Not that your decency matters, look how wet you are for your master…"

He stroked the wet fabric to emphasize his point and you tried to hold back a moan, but it was useless. It felt good, of course it felt good. Light was a hot guy, he obviously knew his way around someone's body and you were only human. His lips captured yours again and he kept playing with your clothed sex as you made out. You could swear you were going insane, the pleasure of his hands on you was intoxicating and his mouth on yours had you gasping for air.

"Get on your knees. Now."

You needed to survive this, you needed to be useful to him. The way he ordered you around did excite you but you needed to stay focused. You were not supposed to feel good, you were supposed to find a way out of this situation.

For now that meant kneeling before Light as he pulled out his cock for you.

You gulped as you eyed him, of course Light Yagami had a big dick, you had to have suspected it. But now you had to give him head and you knew very well he wasn't going to go easy on you. He saw your hesitation and scoffed in amusement.

"Go ahead pet, you want to prove to me you're worth keeping around don't you?" He smiled devilishly at you.

"Yes, master." You murmured and licked your lips. You could do this. And, in a weird way, you kind of wanted to do this, you wanted him to praise you more, to call you a good girl again… you repressed the thought. This is disgusting, Light is disgusting and a murderer. You were strong you won’t fall for his games.

You grabbed his cock by its base and started to gently suck the tip. You looked up at him before taking the whole shaft into your mouth. You sucked him off to the best of your, limited, abilities, trying to get him deeper with each bob of your head. Maybe if he came in your mouth he wouldn’t touch you further, maybe he’d let you go.

Your hopeful thoughts are interrupted by the man’s hand grabbing your hair forcefully, you looked at him and he was grinning like the maniac he was.

“Sit still, let me use your throat a little bit.” His voice was unshaken. You felt a bit annoyed he didn’t seem phased by your efforts. You didn’t have time to dwindle on that feeling because Light was grabbing your face and fucking your mouth as soon as he finished his phrase.

His pace was unrelenting and you felt your spit dribbling down your chin, you tried to breathe in small intervals and you could see him laugh at your predicament. You felt rage but he slowed down his thrusts and started petting your head. Like a kid. Like a pet.

“That’s a good girl, such an obedient little pet…” he breathed and pulled out “Bend over your desk for me.”

Fuck. You were out of breath, you could only nod and do as he said. You didn’t even think of disobeying his order, he praised you again, you were doing a good job… You got up and rested your torso on the desk. He was going to fuck you. Light was Kira and he was blackmailing you into submission. This was an absolute nightmare. So why the fuck were you so turned on?

“You know where you belong, don’t you, pet?” You felt his presence behind you and he pulled down your panties. “Not above anyone, not next to your brother… Not even by my side.” He pulled your hair and you yelped despite yourself “You belong under me.”

He entered you forcefully and you couldn’t help but moan loudly at the intrusion, he didn’t prepare you with his fingers, he didn’t touch you properly at all, it hurt and he knew. But he didn’t give a fuck.

“You should be grateful to your master, whore.” His hand reached around your neck his grip making you gasp. “Tell me you can be obedient.”

“I can!” You cried and you felt his other hand reach between your legs to press your sensitive bud.

“You think you can be useful? Do you think you deserve to live to serve your master?” His thrusts were getting harsher and he groaned “Do you?!”

“Yes, master, please, master!” You begged. To cum, to live, anything. Light held your life in his hands and you were so scared, but so turned on.

“You better....” He grunted and kept on rubbing your clit “I fucking own you. I’m going to cum inside you, going to make you my breeding bitch.”

Oh no. That wasn’t good. That was a bad idea.

“N-no… please not inside” You heard him laugh at your resistance.

“Then tell me… tell me his name.” His name? Fuck. Ryuzaki.

You couldn’t tell him his name. Was he going to kill you if you didn’t? You couldn’t do it. You sobbed and grasped his arm in fear.

“No, I can’t, I can’t!” You cried out shaking your head. The pleasure was overwhelming and you came on his fingers screaming. “I can’t! Ah!”

You saw stars, Light never stopped pounding you as he laughed maniacally at your desperation.

“Know your fucking place… useless cunt.... Fuck-” His laughter died down and he pulled you closer as he came inside you.

You felt his spent dripping down your pussy, you trembled both from the orgasm and from fear of what came next. Light pulled out and turned you around, smiling amused at your scared face.

“Don’t worry, pet, of course I wasn’t counting on a dumb slut like you telling me this information…” He pat your head and you stood there with tears rolling down your face “You’re beneath me, I don’t need you, I don’t need your help. I’ll find out eventually.” He chuckled and wiped away your tears “But I do know your name. So you better behave.” He kissed your forehead. “Won’t you, pet?”

[morguevampire]

(Un) Fortunate Encounters -Chapter 2

Chapter One

Masterlist for this fic

summary:  After being questioned by the FBI about an accidental interaction with a wanted criminal you thought your life would go back to being as mundane as it has always been. How wrong you were to think you could just go back to normal when come the next day you would find yourself being bound to a chair in a fucking warehouse.

warnings/tags: fluff, smut, angst, mentions of kidnapping, mentions of torture, drinking, mild alcoholism, dark themes, slow build romance, not really Stockholm syndrome but that’s up for interpretation 

chapter: 2/?

word count: 2.938k

pairings: Helmut Zemo x fem!Reader

author’s note: Right folks - time for chapter two! 

Note that this will be a very slow build at the beginning, meaning actual interaction with Helmut Zemo will probably only start in chapter four. (I do hope you will find it worth it) Currently already working on chapter three as well - so please be patient. 

My personal disclaimer as always is that I am not an englisch native and will therefore most likely make some mistakes. Please don't hesitate to contact me should I have messed up.

Anyhow, I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think so far! Kudos and comments are always appreciated. 

Muchos besos, mis amores <3

You can also find this work on https://archiveofourown.org/works/43158162/chapters/108466263

The second time you wake up that morning (or is it midday..., perhaps even afternoon?) you’re not in your apartment anymore. Instead you find yourself tied to a chair in a dark room in some kind of warehouse. It’s quiet, aside from the pounding inside your head. An eerie feeling is settling over you, becoming more intense as your mind tries to grasp what happened, how you ended up here. Your first instinct is to scream but there’s duct tape covering your mouth. You shut your eyes again, wishing for this to be a terrible nightmare. You try to wiggle out of your bounds, unsuccessfully. Whoever dragged you here knows stuff about bondage and you’re too much of a weakling to get them off anyways. Panic starts settling in and it all only becomes worse once you hear footsteps echoing from afar. It must be him. Zemo probably discovered the FBI were onto him and now needs to get rid of the woman who made the mistake of running into him. But why not just kill you immediately? Why drag you to a dodgy warehouse? He seems to not care about the loss of innocent lives anyways, considering the attack on the UN building. Your thoughts are interrupted by two man coming out of the shadows. Both of them most definitely not being Zemo but perhaps associates? They look quite scary – that’s for sure. Tall, bulky and extremely angry looking. You begin to squirm in your chair once again. Not quite sure what to hope for, even if you ran, there would be no guaranty that you could get out alive.

“So, the bitch finally woke up.” One of the men, the slightly shorter one with the dirty blond hair huffed.

The other man steps up towards you, his finger already on the left end of the duct tape covering your mouth.

“Listen now, it’s of no use to anybody if you scream once I remove this. We’re in the middle of nowhere. Nobody’s going to hear you and we simply want to ask you a few questions. Understood?”

You can’t bear looking into his eyes, your whole body is shaking while you slightly nod. Tears already burning in your eyes. You wanted to throw up, or pee your pants or whatever the fuck people do when they are scared shitless.

Ripping off the duct tape is painful but if only you knew how much more painful this whole “questioning” would become.

“Alright. If you want this to be over quickly, be a good girl and answer me this simple question:” The taller one inquires while scooting another chair in front of you. The other man is off somewhere out of the corner of your eye, the only thing you can make out is water running into a bucket and the air becoming even more humid than before.

“Where is Helmut Zemo?”

Your eyes widen. Not understanding this situation at all. Were they not here in duty of the Baron? Were they FBI as well? The bad cops? The really bad, desperate ruthless ones? You shake your head no. Frantically trying to explain that you had no idea where he was. That you were just a normal, boring person who had a 9 to 5 and never did anything illegal in her life, besides maybe underage drinking in high school. You simply ran into Helmut Zemo without even knowing and you already got questioned by the FBI. You knew about the man as much as the media would report on him and you had zero ties to the avengers or anybody associated with him.

You could tell the man opposite of you was annoyed. Shaking his head and shushing you.

“See, we know the FBI already questioned you and we don’t work like the FBI. We don’t need those rules. And you won’t be able to pull off your I-know-nothing bullshit with us. You either tell us his whereabouts or this is going to be a looooong night, darling.”

That’s when the other man appeared again. Carrying a huge bucket with water. You gulped as he untied your legs from the chair, forcing you to your knees, which sent a wave of pain through your body as they made contact with the cold, hard concrete floor. You’ve read about water torture and all you wanted to do - in prospect of what you feared was about to happen - was scream and cry for your mum.

“I swear. Please I swear that I do not have any connection to Zemo. I don’t know him, I haven’t even talked to him. I bumped into him on accident. Plea...”

You begged but to no avail as suddenly a sharp pain shot through your already aching head as you were pulled by your hair and forcefully dipped underwater. You didn’t have any time to get air into your lungs, so water got into every available opening in your face, burning up your nose and your windpipes. At least the desperation to breath distracted you from how cold the water was. After too long but probably about only half a minute your head was pulled out again and immediately the questions shot out of the man again, while you were desperately trying to breath and at the same time not suffocate on the water you swallowed. Water in your ears made everything sound dull but you could still clearly tell the questions were still about Helmut Zemo. Only this time you didn’t even manage to properly reply in the negative before your head was underwater again.

This continued on for quite a while. Everything hurt and burnt and every time your head was out of the water you could feel hot tears on your face while sobs and violent coughs were wrecking through your body. This was worse than anything you had ever experienced in your life. You didn’t know what to do. You didn’t have any information. If you did you would give it away immediately. You just wanted the pain and suffering to go away. You wanted it to stop. To go home and hide forever and never set a foot out of your apartment again.

You could tell the two men were becoming more and more frustrated with you as well. Throwing around vile curse words and yanking you even more forcefully in and out of the bucket. You stopped counting how many times you got dunked but at one point the taller man must have had enough of your lack of knowledge about Zemo, so that he decided punching you right in the face might help bring your memories back. You felt blood running down your cheek and dripping into the bucket, giving the water a light pink taint.

If your head hadn’t exploded just yet, you figured now might just be a good time. You honestly just wanted to die. What did it matter anyways? You didn’t know shit about Zemo and you certainly wouldn’t recover from the trauma, if you ever made it out alive from this shithole.

At least after the forceful punch to your left eye the water torture stopped and the hand pulling up your head dropped. Like a sack of potatoes, you slumped on your side, silently wailing in a fetus position while the two men whispered to each other.

Some time passed until a kick in your rips forced you out of your pain induced delusion.

“Right darling. We’ll give you one more chance. You tell us where the fuck Helmut Zemo is hiding and we’ll let you go.”

He knelt down in front of you, snarling into your face while forcefully holding your chin in his hands, twisting your head into an uncomfortable position. “But…, if you don’t speak up now, we really do have no other option but to use other, more painful measures.” The hand grabbing your chin was replaced by the barrel of a gun.

You completely froze. You knew this was it. Perhaps making something up would work but they’d find you anyways, knowing you bullshitted them and death seemed like a sweet release at this point. You wondered when the phenomena of “the light at the end of the tunnel / your life flashing behind your eyes in seconds” would set in but just as you were about to mumble that you really did not know anything and maybe plead one last time to let you go, a gunshot rang through the building.

It seemed like everything stopped for a milli-second until there was a scream from the shorter man and suddenly another gunshot.

It got unpleasantly quiet. You shut your eyes, no thoughts ran through your head except that death didn’t feel any different. The pain was still there, you still felt the cold floor under your body and you could smell the blood dripping from your face. In a way you were disappointed, you thought dying would relieve you of everything. You were never a religious person, but you did believe that death felt like floating. A numb floating, no negative feelings, yet also no positive ones. Just aimless floating.

When you once again heard steps coming towards you, you realized that perhaps you weren’t even dead. You opened your eyes just to come face to face with your kidnapper, his lifeless eyes staring right at you. He must have been shot and has fallen right in front of you. Blood was still oozing out of his body and you could slowly feel it running towards your lying form, soaking the thin cloth of your pajamas.

The footsteps were definitely descending from somewhere now, getting closer. You decided to shut your eyes again, too afraid to see who else decided to have their way with you. You’ve already kind of made peace with the fact that you were going to die and you made the decision to simply not look into your murderer’s eyes once it happens.

The louder the footsteps became the more panic rushed through your body. It surprised you that only then an anxiety attack would overtake you. It suddenly felt hard to breath and a wave of ugly sobs rushed through your aching ribcage. You felt almost pathetic, silently stuttering “please, please, please…” over and over again. Your ears were ringing, still abused from all the water but you picked up the sound of the new intruder dragging the dead man’s body away from you, most likely to get a better shot at you.

Your shaking from barely registered the gentle touch of a hand running over your shoulder. “Shhh, hey…”

You opened your eyes abruptly, recognizing the deep, raspy voice with the accent even though you’ve only heard it once in your life. It was him. Definitely. In a long grey trench coat with a fur collar framing his masked face. He took off the purple disguise before continuing.

“It’s alright. You’re ok. You’re safe now.”

Helmut Zemo was kneeling in front of you, a golden gun right next to his knee. Looking down with furrowed, worried brows on your miserable, hurt form.

Your mind was still trying to make sense of it all but you came to no conclusion as you slowly drifted out of consciousness once again.

[mypoisonedvine]

Consolation || Bucky Barnes x reader

summary: you know it’s probably not great that you always turn to your best friend Bucky whenever you’re especially hurt by your husband.  you know your husband should probably care that you spend so much time with him, but he doesn’t.  which is good, in the end, because you two really are just friends… until you’re not.

word count: 4k

warnings: smut!, infidelity (see summary, reader is married), descriptions of failing/sexless marriage, angst, fluff, ~feelings~

You were good at hiding it— the real reason why you showed up at Bucky's apartment unexpectedly, that is.  

It wasn’t entirely unexpected: you sent a text first, asking if he was down for a movie night, telling him you missed when you used to hang out more.  He did, too, but he had always been afraid your husband would be an issue.  Nice enough guy, but he didn’t seem to trust Bucky entirely… certainly didn’t seem to love that you two were so close.

And who could blame him?  A beautiful, sweet, smart girl like you… he understood why your husband didn’t want you hanging out with other guys when avoidable.  I’ve told him a thousand times, you’re just a friend— you’re just Bucky, you would tell him when you were recounting arguments, explaining why it had been a while since you two had had a chance to catch up.  But Bucky never told you that your husband was right to worry, that he had dreamed since he met you of being more than ‘just a friend,’ that he himself was the reason you two didn’t spend more time together: because he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from confessing his feelings.

Because of course he would never make a move on his best friend— on a married woman.  It would be so overwhelmingly inappropriate, such a colossal waste of time; and it wasn’t like he couldn’t handle just being your friend.  Sure, it killed him a little bit sometimes, but it was worth it a million times over to be near you at all.  He would take what he could get… and if that meant platonic movie night because you’d had another argument with your husband, then so be it.

“I stopped by the store on my way; heard your ice cream reserve was depleted,” you explained as you brandished the Ben & Jerry’s before slipping past him to put them in his freezer.  

He watched you walk there, silently hating how comfortable you were in his apartment.  He loved it, but he hated it, too.  

“What are we watching?” you asked, snapping him back to reality.

“Uh, I dunno…”

“You were supposed to pick while I was driving over, genius,” you grumbled sarcastically.

“I narrowed it down to The Ring or You’ve Got Mail,” he decided suddenly.

You chuckled lightly and the sound lifted his spirits. “Okay, so, two drastically different evenings."

“I mean, if you think about it, they’re both about meeting new people through technology,” he corrected.

“Do VHS tapes count as technology?” you raised an eyebrow incredulously.

“They do to me,” he shrugged.

//

With the ice cream supply exhausted and Bucky’s largest plastic bowl now containing only the unpopped kernels and little broken pieces of popcorn that didn’t make the cut, the third act of The Ring was beginning and you were spending more time covering your eyes than not.

“Let me know when the scary part is over,” you requested weakly from between the hands on your face.

“It’s a horror movie; the whole thing is one long scary part!” he laughed.

You peeked out through your fingers only to see another terrifying moment, yelping and hiding yourself in his chest.

He froze, not sure at all what to do with your face pressed against him; he held his breath in case the inflation of his chest would disturb you.  

“I can’t look!” you whimpered, voice muffled by his shirt.

He lifted his hand in consideration of stroking your hair comfortingly, but ultimately decided against it and set it back down.

Thankfully, the movie was almost over and you wouldn’t stay cuddled up to him after it ended— meaning he’d finally be free from the glorious torture of your nearness.

But then the credits were rolling and you still didn’t budge, holding him tight.  At first he thought you were just still scared, but then you took a slow, shaky breath… and he realized something was wrong with you, way beyond just a spooky movie.

“Are you okay?” he asked quietly, preparing to hear you explain what really happened with you and your husband that made you come here.

You just shook your head a little against his chest, making him sigh.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he continued, and you hesitated before pulling back and sitting up straight again.  As painful as it had been, he missed your touch already.

“Yes,” you answered, “but I shouldn’t.”

“Okay,” he nodded.

“But I need to.”

“Okay.”

“But I can’t.”

“...okay…”

You groaned and hid your face in your hands— not from fear this time, but exasperation.  “I told myself that if it ever got to this point, I’d tell someone.  But now I… I don’t know.”

“It’s okay,” he soothed.

"He doesn't… we don't…” you started and stopped a few times.  “God, Buck, I can't even say it…"

"You don't have to—" he began to tell you, but you said it anyway, tearing your hands away from your face and looking back at him sternly.

"He hasn't touched me in months.  And today marks an entire year since the last time I had sex."

He tried not to choke when he heard that.  He figured you were just going to say that he was texting a female coworker too much or flip-flopping about if he wanted kids or not.  This was something else entirely.  "Oh… um, wow."

“Yeah.”

He wasn’t sure where to start.  In spite of all his obliviousness, he was pretty sure he should say something, he just didn’t know what.  “And he… he knows that you… want that?  I mean, you’ve like… tried to, you know… initiate things, right?”  He cringed at his own voice, and stupid question.

You laughed a little, in a sad way.  "I've begged him for it, fuck, it's so humiliating.  It doesn't even work.  He's always too tired, not in the mood, busy with something.  And of course I want to respect him and not pressure him into anything but at the same time, I feel so fucking unlovable— so hideous."

"You're not hideous,” he said firmly, more sure of that than anything else he’d said so far.

“I try to believe that, really,” you mitigated, “I try not to take it personally— but fuck, it feels personal.  Do you know how often people talk about sex?  It’s like society has this idea that men just wanna bang twenty-four hours a day and the only thing stopping them is women being prudes.  Do you know what it’s like to hear people talk like that when your husband rejects you every night?  Do you know how it feels to hear your girlfriends complaining about how their boyfriends are pestering them for sex too often, and you’re just sitting there screaming inside your head ‘at least he wants you’?  Bucky, you can’t even imagine…”

“I can’t,” he agreed.  

"It's been so long…” you sighed shakily, collecting yourself before you started again.  “It's been so long since somebody touched me.  I wondered if I would forget what it felt like."

His hand shook a little as he reached out with his flesh hand and brushed it against your arm, staring into your watery eyes and finding less fear there than he expected, thankfully.

"Did you forget?" he asked softly.

"I must have," you mumbled, "it feels better than I remembered."

The heartbreak in your voice made anger bubble up in his chest, amazed at how your husband ever allowed this to happen; ever allowed you to become so touch-starved that even just a brush on your arm made you emotional.  "I can't imagine being with you every day and not wanting to touch you whenever I could get the chance,” he admitted.  “I can't imagine being your husband and not making love to you every day, every hour, whenever you wanted; whenever you'd let me.  I can't imagine having you beg me for something and not giving it to you— I'd give you everything."

He had to fight a gasp as you suddenly grabbed him and pulled him into a kiss, a bit sudden at first but melting into something gentle and patient and soft.  

“Then do it,” you whispered as you finally pulled back; he could barely think straight to even process what you were saying.  “Give me everything.”

He nodded a little before he kissed you again, rough but deep and slow.  His hands roamed your body like he'd wished to for so long; his tongue slid against yours and the taste of you drove him wild.

As hard as it was to break from your lips, he moved his kisses down your jaw to your neck, sucking at your pulse as you groaned and clutched at his shoulders through his shirt.

"Fuck," you whispered under your breath, and he must've heard you swear a million times but this time it sounded so different.  

His cock was straining against his jeans already, just from this— it was like he was a fucking teenager again, but to be fair, you'd always had that effect on him: sweaty palms, stammering, sudden boners.  It was like lifelong puberty with you around.

When his fingers toyed with the hem of your shirt, just barely brushing over the skin right above your sweats, you pulled back briefly to pull your shirt off over your head.  He thought it might be awkward if he just stood there gawking at your chest, so he only allowed himself a moment of it before he got back to work holding you tight and kissing your collarbones.

He pulled you closer and you must've felt his cock pressed against you because you gasped a little.  And you must've liked it, because your hand slipped down and rubbed him through the front of his jeans, making him choke on nothing.

“S’big,” you mumbled, and he grinned a little.  

“Feel what you do to me?” he asked softly, and you nodded a little before grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand down your body and into the waistband of your pants.  He shuddered when he felt how warm your skin was, the lacy fabric of your panties, the slick folds you guided his fingers through.

“Feel what you do to me?” you shot back, but your cockiness faded when he circled his middle finger over your swollen bud.  He loved the way your body reacted so easily, subtle little gasps and shivers, your hips jolting forward for more stimulation.  You both moaned when he pushed a finger into your channel, your walls already pulsing around him.

“Is this okay?” he asked.

You whispered your approval and he twisted the finger inside you.  Even just that made you let out a heavy breath, your hands reaching down to grip his wrist— they didn’t push him away, thankfully, just reminded him to be gentle with you as he added the second finger, pushing a bit deeper than before.

“More,” you whimpered your plea, “I want more.”

For a second he thought you meant more fingers, but then you opened your eyes and gave him a look… that look.  

It made it abundantly clear that fingers weren’t going to be enough.  After all, you had asked him to give you everything.  So he gladly obliged when you started to tug at his shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it aside.  You lifted your hips to let him pull down your sweats, not giving him much time to drink in the sight of you before you started opening his fly for him.

Being undressed by you made his heart race; the way you rushed, like you couldn’t wait a moment longer to have him, was flattering yet relatable.

You sighed when you got his cock out, instantly wrapping your hand around his shaft and stroking.  He shuddered at the softness of your hands, at your gentle but persistent exploration.  Clearly it had been a while since you’d gotten the chance to interact with a dick, but it didn’t show in any lack of skill— if anything it just made you more eager, your grip firm but your touches gentle.  He kissed you again, holding your face in one hand and leaning you back with the other until you were laid on the couch and he was hovering over you.

He guided your hand away from his cock, replacing it with his own as he guided the weeping head over your slick folds, smiling at your gasp when he bumped against your clit.

“Do you want this?” he asked, fully prepared for you to back out now before you did something you really couldn’t take back.

“Yes.”  Your answer was more confident than he was expecting, but he still couldn’t really believe it.  It was just too good to be true.  So he had to check again.

“...are you sure?”

"Don't make me beg, Bucky," you whimpered, "I've done it enough, I can't do it again.  Just make love to me— I need you inside me, please…"

Your head fell back as he pushed into you, your nails digging into his shoulders until he stopped from fear of hurting you (even though it took more willpower than he knew he had).

"Don't stop," you whined, "need to feel all of you, Bucky, please please don't stop—"

He definitely didn't have enough willpower to resist that.  Slamming into you all at once, he hissed as you cried out, baring his teeth at the sight of you quivering and moaning beneath him.

"I— I need a second," you explained, voice tight with ill-concealed pain, "it's been a while.”

"I can wait," he nodded, "I won't move until you're ready."

He could tell you were struggling, because how could you not be when you felt so fucking tight around him?  He guided you to breathe slowly with him, feeling your body relax slightly and noticing the way your face untwisted as you became more comfortable.

You nodded a little, but he needed to hear you say it.  "Fuck me," you whispered.

And he did.  

He still kept his pace measured and relaxed, savoring every inch of you— savoring your reactions to every inch of him.

But watching your face was going to push him towards the edge too fast, and he wanted to make this last if possible, so he leaned down to suck on your neck, thoroughly tasting your skin as you moaned and writhed beneath him.  It felt incredible to surround your body with his, to cage you in and pin you down with his weight— it made him feel like he could protect you, keep you safe, even though he knew he couldn’t save you from heartache as much as he wanted to.

If you wanted someone to touch you, to give you affection, to make love to you and make you feel loved, then you’d come to the right place.  That came to him naturally; the hard part was going to be letting you go, letting this be the one-time favor for a friend that he already knew it was.

“You feel so good,” he found himself whispering against your skin, just beside your ear, “so good for me.”

The praise must have had a strong effect on you, because your walls tightened around him suddenly.

“So perfect,” he continued, wanting to feel it again, “my perfect girl.”  And you weren’t his girl, but maybe he could pretend you were; you certainly seemed to enjoy pretending, with the way your moans egged him on.  “God, baby, your pussy feels so fucking good around my cock.”

“Bucky,” you whined, arching your back, and he grinned because it was obvious that you responded even better to dirty talk than praise.

“You like that, huh?  You like makin’ me feel good?” he pressed, laughing a little when you nodded feverishly.  “Fuck, such a good girl… takin’ me so good, so fuckin’ deep…”

You grabbed him by his hair to make him kiss you again, hungry lips smashing against his.

Inspired by your passion but afraid of what he’d do with all of this control, he wrapped his arms around you and hoisted you up until he was sitting while you straddled him, looking up at you with a grin.  "Ride me, pretty girl, show me how bad you want it," he instructed lowly.  The way you rocked your hips and threw your head back was everything he'd dreamed it would be, increased exponentially.  Of course, he'd never told anyone that he dreamed about that, but he'd also never thought it could ever come true.  He ran his hands over every part of you he could reach, just to make sure it was real; just to make sure he memorized the feel of you while he could.

He leaned forward and wrapped his lips around a hardened nipple, sucking gently and smirking a little when you moaned loudly.  “You’re sensitive here,” he noted aloud, kissing his way to the other nipple but still teasing the first with his metal fingers.

Your moans came faster and louder, your fingers combing through his hair and pulling seemingly unintentionally.  He noticed that you let your eyes fall shut, your head crane back, and although he was glad that it was a sign of pleasure, he wanted to see you; he wanted you to see him, know that it was him making you feel this way.  so, he reached up and cupped your face in his hand, cradling your cheek, pulling you closer to look at him, staring into your eyes— and he knew it wasn't a subtle move, wasn't believable as a guy just helping out a friend, but he didn't care anymore.  When he kissed you again, it almost felt like you meant it, too; like you wanted him first, and not just as a consolation prize.

But you pulled back a little too soon, a reminder to both of you that this couldn’t be anything more than what it was.

Your hips gyrated faster and more vigorously, his hands gripping you tight and guiding your movements while you sighed and bit your lip.  You looked so indescribably good when you were immersed in pleasure like this, your hands gripping his shoulders tightly for balance, your chest swelling and deflating with quick breaths.

“So fucking beautiful,” he whispered below his breath as his hand softly trailed from your collarbone down to your thigh.  The sounds you made were constantly changing, a little more high-pitched and needy now as you rode him faster.  He was already picking up on the little signs that you were getting closer: your thighs flexing where they were straddled beside his own, how your body jolted and shivered in his grasp, your eyes wrenched shut and your skin breaking out into goosebumps.

Already he knew your body so well, but he knew there was so much more he would never get the chance to discover.  For now, he’d just have to settle for a preview of all the perfect little ways you fell apart.

And, in the interest of speeding that process up a bit, he reached down to where your bodies were joined and circled a thumb over your clit.

“Fuck!” you yelped, your inner muscles bearing down on him out of nowhere until he was forced to groan from your tightness.

“You close?” he stammered out, way less confident than he meant it to be.  He should’ve said something cool like ‘I know you’re close’ or ‘aw, baby, does that feel good?’ but no, he was too far gone and gave his own desperation away.

"Yes, baby, I'm so close," you sighed, "I'm gonna come— you're gonna make me come."

You said it with a hint of shock in your voice, like you could barely believe it.  He couldn't believe it, either, because it was surely too good to be true.

"Come for me," he instructed firmly, pulling you closer until his nose brushed against yours, "say my name when I make you come."

It was unfair, but he needed to pretend you were his for just a moment.  Only his.

"Bucky," you whimpered shakily.  Your walls tightened around him so perfectly, over and over, until it took everything in him not to bust right then.  "Bucky, I'm coming, fuck, I'm coming—"

"I know," he whispered, "I know, pretty girl, keep going."

Your nails dug into his skin, but he couldn’t even notice the pain when he was watching your face as you came— it was tight and twisted at first, before falling into a gasp and a moan that made his heart swell along with his cock that painted your walls the absolute second he knew you’d come.  It was intense, not just from holding back for so long, but from knowing he was coming inside you.

He sighed and started to catch his breath as you slumped forward and buried your face in the crook of his neck.  His arms wrapped around you and pulled you closer, the warmth of your body nearly overwhelming now as he felt little aftershocks ripple through your channel around where he was still within you.

"Thank you," you whispered, so quiet he could barely hear it.  But he did, and he nodded a little as he rested his face against yours, stroking your hair gently.  You held each other in silence for a long time, so long that when your breathing slowed down significantly and he could feel your body relax entirely, he realized you had fallen asleep.  

Carefully, he held you tighter so he could stand up and carry you to his bedroom, your body instinctively wrapping around him like a koala… like even in your sleep, you could act all adorable and break his heart just that much more.  

He did his best to tread quietly and gently, laying you down onto the bed and only then pulling his softened cock out of you, finding his discarded boxers to put back on before joining you between the sheets.  

He knew you would be gone in the morning but he indulged himself in holding you tonight, breathing your scent and pressing your back against his chest.  He didn't want to fall asleep because he didn't want to miss a second of your body wrapped in his, but it was impossible not to with the soft pace of your breathing almost rocking him to sleep like a beautiful lullaby.

Where there was warmth and peace before, he awoke to cold and emptiness— both between his sheets and in himself.

It’s not like he really expected you to stay, and even if you had it wouldn’t mean that you would leave your husband for your best friend, that this would have ever been anything more than a glimpse of what could’ve been in another life or another universe.

He could still smell you, barely, and he buried his face in the sheets to take it all in before it faded away.  When it was gone, he pulled back only to find a wet patch of his tears there instead.

[bcdwhcre]

hey queen! Girl you have done it again. Constantly raising the bar for us all and doing it flawlessly. i’d say i’m surprised but i know who you are. i’ve seen it up close and personal. girl you make me so proud.

“Father figure” is so cute omg 🥺 Could Maybe write something about reader finally joining the scouts and Levi/erwin being so impressed by scared for her (if u want)

“Father Figure,” Pt 2 Levi x Erwin Headcanon

PLEASEEEE, I love you🤧❤️ I shall give out a part 2. I’m thinkinnnng Levi’s reaction to you joining scouts annnnd Erwin’s reaction to both you wanting to be a scout and dating Jean😗 we’ll see how that goes.

Warnings: Season 3 mentions aka the beast titan for Levi. that is alllllllll

PART ONE

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Levi:

It had taken weeks, even a few months before Levi had finally went through with letting you join the scouts but he never took it easy on you, he treated you the same and even when he would train with you alone, he would be more harsh.

He only did this to benefit you, he wanted you to be better and definitely better than him and it had all worked in his favor. Once the first expedition came along, you had proven yourself well above than what the scouts expected.

As Levi watched you swing, flip and spin along the lines between buildings and the way you swiftly had taken down your first Titan, he was in awe the entire time. His eyes never left you and he would admit he got a bit emotional.

The flashbacks of you as a small child, tugging on his coat that he would wear and the way you always wanted to ride his horse or hear stories, they all flooded his mind. His own child stood in front of him, grown up and turned into a mini Levi and he couldn’t help but feel proud.

It wasn’t long until you turned into exactly like Levi onto the field, always putting yourself at risk and taking the bigger Titans on by yourself with no issue. He was shocked to say the least, he wouldn’t have expected you to grow up so quickly and turn into such a great scout.

One mission in particular had Levi on the edge, when the commander had ordered for only Levi to handle the beast titan, you had all but ignored both their commands and followed behind your father in battle. Maybe it was because you were worried for your dads safety, you didn’t want him to take the beast Titan on his own. You knew he was the best of the best but even then, you still knew your fathers weakness.

At the last moment, you had swooped in and spun around in the air, using your blades to swipe through and cut the hand off that was reaching for you before lunging your blades right through his eyes, hearing Levi yelling behind you.

“What the hell are you doing?! This wasn’t your mission!” He was beyond frustrated with you but more fearful that you would get caught up because you were too confident in yourself.

You ignored your fathers yelling, following his lead and instantly breaking apart the beast Titan until Levi had sliced the nape of his neck open and saw the older man break out of the Titans skin.

“Y/N, take your ass back to where the cadets are!” Levi grabbed onto your upper arm and practically yanked you towards him, the fury in his eyes was all but filled with fear.

“Dad, we literally just took down the beast Titan and you’re screaming in my face because I helped?” You glared up at him, the stubbornness you both had was too overbearing.

While you two were busy bickering about you joining in the fight, another Titan swooped in and had almost chopped you up in their mouth but Levi had pushed you down, watching the Titan pick the beast Titans body and run off.

“You let them get away because you were too fucking worried about me!” You yelled at your father, the anger boiling in both of you was steaming hot and he couldn’t help but feel angry towards himself too, for letting him get so distracted.

Levi had let a deep breath in, rubbing his temples for a moment as he tried to think clearly. He had reached over to you, embracing you in a tight hug and rested his chin on the top of your head, luckily you were short enough for him to even do so.

“I’m sorry, I’m trying to get used to you being out here and I get... scared. Only because you remind me of... me when I first joined, always putting yourself on the line, always going out of your way to prove you’re better but I need you to be careful.” He fully admitted, shaking his head at your carelessness but he couldn’t stay mad because you learned all that from him.

“Dad, I’m not stupid. I’m being careful, you have to trust me.” You rolled your eyes at your father, you frustrated you but you couldn’t help but understood the fear he felt while you were out here with him.

“I do trust you but I also need you to listen to commands when directed, do you hear me? You aren’t in control.” He grabbed your shoulders and forced you to look up at him, making you slowly nod you head.

“Don’t let that shit happen again or else you’ll be on horse shit duty.”

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Erwin:

Erwin wasnt as strict when you joined the scouts, he was actually pretty proud to know he raised you to be a great cadet and probably a great future leader. All the nights he helped trained you was a very proud moment for him to be apart of.

He felt like he had accomplished something greater, this was a feeling better than becoming a Commander and that was raising you to be a great scout member.

He had put you under Levi’s team for many reasons, only because he wanted him to watch you closely and he had trusted Levi enough to put his child’s fate in his hands.

He had watched you flourish nicely on expeditions, you always proved yourself to be great. Your first expedition you had taken down a total of five Titans on your own and ended up saving Connie in the middle of it.

Erwin couldn’t help but openly get emotional in front of everyone, causing them to grow awkward at your fathers tears as he watched you. You had repeatedly told him to stop being so emotional about everything but he did anyways, he couldn’t help but cry only because he was so proud of who you’ve grown to be.

The long nights of staying up with you when you wouldn’t sleep, the days where he would forget about his work to take you out on walks, to explore with you and play silly games that you made up. It was all worth it to him and his heart was full of love and happiness when it came to you.

But one day he had been looking for you after a mission, he was pretty worried and wanted to talk to you with dinner about how the mission went. He unexpectedly caught you and Jean outside alone, lips smashed together.

“Y/N, Jean.” He cleared his throat awkwardly and your face instantly heated up into a dark shade of red once you both had been caught, you wished it was anyone else but your own dad, you were completely embarrassed.

You had rushed inside, following your dad to his office where you two usually sat and ate your meals. Erwin was silent, he couldn’t stay mad at you thought, it was bound to happen that his own child would grow up and find someone.

“I didn’t know you two were daring.” He spoke up, causing your face to heat up again and you had tried to look anywhere else but him

“I mean, yeah, it’s only been recent.”

“Ahh and he makes you happy, yes? That’s what I would hope for.” He stared at you, both of you making eye contact and you were shocked that he was acting so calm about everything.

“Yeah, I’m happy.”

“Good, good but that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about. I’ve been watching you on some missions and even had your Captain report back to me on how you do on them. I know I’ve said I didn’t want you to be apart of this life but I’m very proud of you, you’ve grown up to be amazing and intelligent. I’m proud to be your father.” Erwin told you, taking a bite out of his food to hold in the emotions he wanted to express but he had to tell himself to not be such an emotional father.

“Oh,” You were certainly caught off guard by his words and you had to think to yourself if this was a dream and ask yourself why was your father acting like this.

“Thank you, I really appreciate it, dead.” You smiled at him, both of you finishing your dinner rather quickly.

Erwin had ended the night laughing and bringing up stories of when you were a small child to both you and Jean, he mostly told you the embarrassing stories and would mention one or two that were adorable. You had shaken your head at your fathers idea of a fun time, telling embarrassing stories but Jean had been enjoying himself a little too much.

Your father stood across from you, the intense feeling of being proud but also mixed with fear when it came to you telling him about today’s mission and how you taken out a few Titans in a second all on your own. You were definitely his child but it was scary to see how fascinated you were with being a scout and how truly happy you were with your job.

Erwin had to swallow his pride and his instinct to be an over protecting father, he always feared for your life out on those missions but he also trusted you and your strength to come back alive and well, you were his child after all.

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AHH well. I hope this is as good as the first one🤧

• Main Masterlist •

• AOT Masterlist •

[ultimate-sidemen-imagines]

A Not So Happy Anniversary

Title: A Not So Happy Anniversary

Pairing: Reader/Harry

Word Count: 3,151

Warning: SMUT SMUT SMUT

Summary: You and Harry have a long distance relationship. When Harry messes up and misses your three year anniversary, you confront him face to face.

Author’s Note: Ladies and gents, it feels good to be back. My inbox is open to requests. Let me know what you think!

You were furious with him. 

Completely and utterly furious with him. 

He had done this to you a million times, you always had forgiven him and moved on. But this? This was definitely something you couldn’t let go.

Both you and Harry had been dating for three years now, not a moment did you regret the decision to date the famous "wroetoshaw" on YouTube. You would be the first one to admit that his fanbase and everything that came with being labeled as his girlfriend terrified you but Harry made it worth it. Thankfully, the both of you had managed to keep your relationship away from the public. Fans not in your personal lives eliminated any unnecessary stress you both didn’t need. You were happy, he was happy. You guys barely fought. But that was about to change tonight.

Harry lived in two places: Guernsey and London. He traveled back between the two constantly which always made you a little bit upset. You understood why he'd want to live in London, of course you did. When you had gone out there with him, even you struggled to leave London once your time was up. A mix of the city life and the fact most of Harry’s friends lived there - it was a no brainer. 

But being stranded in Guernsey while Harry was away in London had been the first major roadblock in your relationship. There would be long amounts of time that Harry would be in London, leaving you by yourself at home and missing your boyfriend. He'd always come back eventually and apologize in a shower of kisses. You couldn't help yourself but forgive him but this was too far now. 

You stormed off back inside your small little flat, flipping off any guys that whistled at you in your short, black mini-dress while doing so. You had decided to get dressed up since tonight was a pretty big deal - the three year milestone with Harry. Your anniversary was today, something that you had reminded Harry about for two weeks. He promised over and over again that he would be home on time for your anniversary and that he'd meet you at your favorite restaurant for a romantic meal. Long story short, you had been sitting at the table for two hours with no sign of Harry. He'd let you down. 

You burst through the front door of your flat, throwing your heels off to the floor and locking the door with both locks. At least that way, Harry couldn't get in if he got there in the morning. You sniffled, feeling yourself now start to get upset more than angry. How could he do this? He promised. You’d always forgiven him for being late to come home before but this just felt like a slap in the face. 

A second later, you were at the fridge - taking out a bottle of wine and taking a swig from it. You knew it was stupid to try and numb the pain with alcohol, it would only leave you feeling like shit in the morning. You shook your head and put the bottle away, deciding to just go to bed and forget about Harry until the morning. 

It was about half an hour later when you had finally gone to bed, wearing one of Harry’s t-shirts and sweats. You were scrolling through Twitter to see if Harry had written anything yet no tweets came up for today. You were a little concerned at that but once you remembered just why you were angry with them, any feelings of being concerned were out the window. You turned off your phone and placed it on your side table - not being able to avoid the framed photo of you and Harry sitting there. At the sight of it, you quickly turned off your lamp and went to sleep. 

-

"Y/N, Y/N. Baby, wake up." You felt yourself being shaken out of your dream, your name being repeated over and over again. Eventually, your dream of a happy anniversary slipped away and your eyes fluttered open. 

You saw a dark figure over you in the bed, causing you to scream out. The figure put his hand over your mouth, trying to reach over to turn on the light as you struggled against his hand. "Babe! Stop! It's me! Harry!" He exclaimed in a loud whisper, turning on the dim lamp light to reveal himself. 

You calmed down as soon as you realized it was him, shoving him off you and sitting up in the bed. "For fuck sake Harry, you can't just hover over me in pitch darkness at-" You looked over at the time. "2:30 in the fucking morning!" 

"How the hell did you get in here anyway? I locked the front door with both locks." You grumbled, crossing as arms as Harry raised an eyebrow

"Yeah, I noticed that. I had to climb up a floor outside and get in through your window." He motioned the open window before shooting you an amused look. "I told you that you needed to lock your windows." 

"And you need to take the hint when I don’t want you in the flat." You grumbled, before grabbing one of your pillows and throwing it at him. "Harold, leave. I don't want to fucking talk to you or even look at you right now." 

"C’mon babe, don’t be like that. I know you missed me." He joked, only making the situation worse in pure Harry style. How the hell could he be making jokes and not even acknowledge how badly he had messed up? You just glared at him, shoving him off the edge of your bed and laying back down. "Go to the couch - we’ll talk in the morning when you’re actually ready to have a serious conversation.”

"Baby, come on. I'm joking." He cooed as you just ignored him and tried to go back to sleep. Harry bit his lip and sat back on the bed again next to you, watching your body turn away from him. He took the peaceful moment to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear before running a finger down your arm softly. 

"Harry, I’ll seriously do something I’ll regret if you don’t get out and give me some space." You seethed, though Harry didn't budge. 

"Your threats don't make you scary, babe. You're like a hamster." He teased before he decided to get serious - he knew you'd really kick him out of the flat if he kept pulling jokes as such. "Look I'm sorry, okay?" 

"Sorry for what, Harry? Missing our anniversary, maybe? Maybe promising you'd be home yet you didn't come back on time. Really? I always let it go but you crossed a fucking line this time." You shot back at him. 

"My flight got delayed, okay?" Harry admitted in defeat. "The plane was having engine failure so we couldn't take off in time. I had to sit on that plane for ages, I only just landed an hour ago." He said, leaning down to kiss your shoulder. "I'm really sorry that I missed our dinner. I'll make it up to you, okay? Please don't be angry with me. It’s not my fault that Gatwick is proper shit." 

"No Harry, I will be angry at you." You said annoyed, still refusing to turn your body towards him. "Okay fair enough, your flight got pushed back far. But you could've come back to Guernsey days ago so you wouldn't miss our anniversary or maybe actually spend some time with me - but no. You're too busy partying it up in London with all your friends and all the girls that probably want to sleep with you the first chance they get. I know there’s gonna be one day where you just don’t come back to Guernsey for me and that’ll be the end of us." 

"Babe, where is all this coming from? You know when we started dating that I said I’d be travelling back and forth." Harry frowned, knowing your anger was coming from something more than him missing dinner tonight. He hated to see you aggravated over this topic. Especially when all his friends knew just how much he loved you and how loyal he was. He knew that you weren’t exactly the biggest fan of the amount of female attention he received online. He understood that. But it did bother him seeing you truly believe that he’d never come back home to you one day. “What makes you think I’d ever do anything like that to you?”

"I’m just scared, Harry." You whispered back at him. "I'm very scared of what could happen while you're in London while I'm stuck here." You closed your eyes and tried to block everything out. Until you felt him turn you on your back. You opened your eyes slowly to look up at Harry hovering over you. You felt your heart skip a beat looking up at him in the dim light. Even when you were upset and mad with him, he still had the power to take your breath away. 

"You're mad, you know that? Absolutely crazy." Harry stated, leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead. "You think I'd get bored of you? Seriously? Take a look in the fucking mirror, Y/N." He teased you before he returned to neutral. “Whatever I’ve done to make you believe any of what you just said? I’m so sorry, babe. The last three years I’ve had with you have been the best of my life. I would never violate you like that.”

“You know I also work in London too - doing all the Sidemen shoots and videos. I’m building that brand more and more to make sure that I can always come home whenever I want. I’m doing it so that we can live comfortably, that I can take you on holidays and help you pay for this place while I’m away. Never once have I been in London and not missed you, Y/N. I know I’m definitely far from perfect but I won’t let you think that I don’t love you. Cause I do, so fucking much.”

He leaned down and placed kisses down the side of your face - pressing a quick peck on your lips before moving down to your neck. 

"I fucking hate you sometimes." You insulted, gasping when you felt him leave love bites on the certain spot on your neck that drove you crazy. You snaked a hand into his hair when he did so, feeling yourself wanting him more rather than wanting to punch him back to London. 

"I sincerely doubt that you hate me right now." He said in a cocky tone, pulling his head back to admire the hickies he had left on your neck and smirking down at you. 

"Shut the fuck up." You growled, grabbing his fistful of his jumper and pulling his face back down to yours. You slammed your lips back against his, the whole action coming from both anger at him missing your anniversary dinner and lust at the same time. You knew there was love in your actions as well but you were more focused on other things at hand. 

Harry did a pretty good job at keeping up with the pace of your lips against his, deepening it and taking the moment to nip at your bottom lip. You moaned softly at that before your hands were underneath his clothes, practically ripping them off him and throwing them off to the side. He did the same with you, the both of you continuing to keep your lips together almost like it was a form of life source. 

It wasn't long before the couple were now fully naked, Harry's body pressing against yours as you made out. Something about his skin pressed against yours always gave you a funny feeling in your stomach - such a warm and safe feeling. You knew that you loved this boy after three years of dating, you only hoped you'd be able to communicate that through this.

Harry pulled back after a while, leaning over to the bedside table to retrieve a condom while you placed kisses along his neck. You made sure to leave your own marks on his skin. He grabbed one quickly enough and groaned at your hickies, pulling himself off to you long enough to roll the condom onto himself. You felt your eyes gleam at the sight of your fit boyfriend in his most vulnerable state. You completely understood why she got so jealous of him being away from you - he was such a gorgeous boy. 

Your boyfriend was back on you a second later, continuing to make-out with you again as he settled himself between your legs. You wrapped your legs around his waist to keep him close, eventually both of you pulling away for air. There were no words uttered between the two, speaking with your eyes and facial expressions. The rough lust and anger had faded away now to a soft kindness and love that you felt whenever you were near Harry. You smiled at him as he returned the favor before pushing into you without another second wasted. 

"Oh!" You moaned, leaning your head back against the pillows as he did so. It had been awhile for you both, having been ages since he was last home. You had definitely missed this. "Harry," You breathed out as he let out a long sigh, getting used to the feeling of being back inside you before he started to set a pace. “Feel so good around me, baby. Fuck I missed you.”

"Harry," You moaned louder this time, going up in volume the faster he went. "Harder, baby." You urged him on, hearing a type of groan and growl leave from his lips. He buried his face into your neck as he continued to thrust faster, leaving more hickies on the other side of your neck. 

"Oh fuck yes." He grunted against your skin, his words only bringing back that fluttery feeling in your stomach. "My gorgeous girlfriend. Even when you’re angry at me, you’re still so fucking hot.” He whispered, lifting his head up from your neck to look at you in the eyes while he fucked you. “No-one can have you, you hear me? You're mine." He whispered, taking one of his hands to wrap around your neck. Not too tight but enough to send your mind spiraling.

"Oh fuck Harry!" You cried out at this, your hands going straight to his shoulders. You dug your fingernails into his skin, dragging them down his pale back as you struggled to get your words out. "You're mine, Lewis. You're mine and I'm yours." You choked out, gasping and moaning out a version of his name at every thrust.

"Damn right." He growled, eventually turning you both over so you were on top of him. He kept control despite the change in position, angling his hips up and holding your hips to keep you steady. He kept doing that for a while, just smirking at hearing the porn-worthy noises that came past your lips. That smirk wiped away however when he felt his thrusts starting to falter, Harry coming closer and closer to his orgasm just like you.

"Oh baby, I'm so close." You whispered, clutching onto him as she felt her high nearing. Harry only smirked at this, trying to go as fast as he could in that moment. He sat up from the mattress, keeping a hold on your hips. He kissed you, "Go on baby, come for me. I wanna hear you." He growled against your lips. That was your breaking point.

"Harry!" You practically screamed, reaching orgasm. It was incredible the types of orgasms Harry gave to you, they always left you speechless and shaking. You heard strangled groans of your name come from Harry, feeling him reach his orgasm too. You kept rocking your hips against his as you both worked each other through your orgasms - eventually stopping when Harry pulled out. He collapsed down onto the mattress, bringing you down with him and holding you against him.

You were left a panting mess, resting against Harry’s body and your head on his chest. All that could be heard was your and Harry's panting, both of your eyes closed to take in what just happened before Harry motioned you to look at him.

"You still mad at me?" Harry asked sweetly after a while, “I don’t know how you could be after that.”

"Oh shut up." You rolled your eyes playfully, enjoying his laughter before you pecked his lips.

"Still - I still think something needs to change, Harry." You admitted, gaining Harold's attention. "I mean... I... I love you, I do. And I want to be with you. But you’re in London constantly. I can’t even travel to see you that often because of university. If I’m just barely going to see you, I can't deal with that. I need a compromise." 

Harry thought about what you said for a moment, placing a small kiss to your forehead. "You're right. I will admit that I love London more than Guernsey but I love you more than anything." He admitted to you, nothing left but love filling his beautifully colored eyes of his. "So let's fix the problem. When you graduate from uni, come back to London with me."

"What?" You asked, confused. 

"Come back with me to London, move in with me and Cal. We never have to be apart that way." He cooed. "I can talk to the guys about letting me come back to Guernsey every couple weeks or so to see you more rather than what I have been doing until you finish school. But when you finish, I want you to move out to London to stay with me permanently. I want to have you there for everything. None of this long distance bullshit. Especially if it’s making you doubt me. I want you with me. To prove to you that you never had anything to be scared about.”

It was definitely a lot for you to take in, moving from your small little town to the big city of the UK. You were nervous about thinking of starting a life there but as you looked at Harry and saw that future involved him - it became a no brainer. 

"We'll talk about it properly in the morning, okay? For now, let’s get some sleep. Especially since you gotta make up for missing today." You said softly with a smile, pecking his lips before laying your head back on his chest. 

"So after the morning sex?" Harry teased, making you roll your eyes and hitting him with the nearest pillow as his laughter vibrated throughout the whole flat. 

Yep. London sounded pretty good.

[t0wnspersonb]

Just wanted to let you know your writing is AMAZING. dunno if you take requests or not but if you do I'd love one of protective kuroo, kind of like the akaashi fic you did! I know you just did a kuroo one (which was also amazing, I loved it) but I'm a kuroo girl so i can't get enough haha

Thank you so much for the kind words! I am taking requests on top of the other stuff I’m writing:) everyone is low key a Kuroo girl and if someone disagrees with that they can fight me lmao just kidding! But here you go! I hope you enjoy the story:)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You hummed softly to yourself as you watched your legs swing back and forth, the bench you were sitting on kept your feet off the ground.

 You looked around and sighed softly, Kuroo was running late. 

 It had been a long time since you guys had gone on a date, he was busy preparing for the Spring Tournament, and you were busy with your extra college prep courses.

 So when he had suggested going to the amusement park that recently opened up, you definitely couldn’t refuse. 

 You were waiting in front of the entrance for Kuroo to arrive, considering he was the one who had bought the tickets.

 “Y/n!” you heard the familiar voice of your boyfriend call out. You looked up to see him waving an arm in the air, smiling at you. Behind him you saw Kenma grumbling to himself as he stuffed his hands further into the hoodie he was wearing.

 Your lips twitched in amusement. That was probably why he was late.

 “Hi Kenma!” you said brightly once they reached you, wrapping the second year in a tight hug.

 “Hi Y/n.” he mumbled quietly, softly returning the hug. 

 “Oi! Why does Kenma get a hug before your boyfriend?” Kuroo grumbled, an annoyed expression taking over his features.

 “Because Kenma wasn’t the one who was late.” you retorted, sticking out your tongue. 

 He huffed angrily and reached a hand out to grab you away from the setter, only for you to slap his hand away, continuing to cling to the pudding haired male.

 “Damn you Kenma!” 

 “Be quiet Kuroo.” Kenma sighed. “I didn’t even want to go. You dragged me out of the house.”

 “That’s because if I didn’t you’d be stuck inside all day playing video games. It’s good to have fun once in a while.” Kuroo stated simply, finally pulling you away from his teammate and into his arms.

 “Playing video games is fun Kuroo.” Kenma shot back, taking out his phone. “Besides, isn’t this supposed to be a date? Why would you have me tag along? You and Y/n haven’t spent much time together recently.” he glanced up looking between the two of you.

 You had forgotten about your annoyance towards Kuroo for being late now that you were wrapped up in his arms. Right now you were incredibly content as you leaned against his tall form.

 “It’ll be fun Kenma! I haven’t seen you much either. Let’s go enjoy the park together!” You said happily.

 You had known the two boys since you were in middle school, and quite frankly once you had started dating Kuroo you kind of expected Kenma to be there half the time. They were a package deal, and you honestly didn’t mind, sometimes preferring the quiet second year’s presence more than your boyfriend’s.

 Kenma sighed in defeat and trailed after you guys as you made the way to the counter to hand in your tickets.

 Once you guys were actually inside the park Kenma seemed to have perked up just a bit.

 You talked animatedly towards Kuroo about what you wanted to do for the day. Your hands intertwined together as you spoke.

 You hadn’t noticed the soft gaze that came over the tall third year. Kuroo couldn’t help but to stare at you. It had definitely been too long since the last time you guys got to be together. He missed you terribly. He missed the ridiculous facial expressions that came over your face when you were talking, he missed the way you pouted whenever he teased you, he missed the way you would play with your long hair whenever you were nervous. 

 Fuck, he just missed you entirely. He felt guilty about how busy he was with the volleyball club, feeling like he was being a terrible boyfriend for neglecting you for so long.

 But you understood completely, you knew how important volleyball was to him and you just wanted to be able to give him unconditional love and support. 

 Plus, those extra courses were brutal. While you loved spending time with Kuroo, you also knew how incredibly distracting he was during homework. So you were grateful for the time apart to get everything done.

 “Do you guys want food?” Kuroo asked, staring at the food stalls. You guys had finished riding the thrill rides, and playing most of the game stalls at the park. 

 You were having a wonderful time, and there were those rare moments where you saw Kenma smiling to himself, he had the most fun playing the stall games, and he was actually pretty good at it. He had won the majority of the prices that were now in your grasp. Much to Kuroo’s distaste. 

 But Kuroo had won you a black cat plushy. Despite the frustration he felt at only being able to win you the small stuffed animal, the look on your face was worth it. 

 He had never seen anything more beautiful; the way your eyes lit up and the wide smile that stretched across your face. It was definitely worth it. Especially when you declared that the cat’s name was going to be Tetsu. 

 While Kuroo went off to go get food, you and Kenma found a place to sit. “You’re really good at those shooting games Kenma.” You stated, sitting across from the quiet male.

 He looked up at you from his phone and smiled slightly. “It’s not that hard, it’s just like some of the video games I play.”

 “I suck at video games.” you sighed, frowning slightly. “Tetsuro always makes fun of me because of it.”

 “I know.”

 “Don’t be mean.” you pouted. Kenma laughed slightly at your expression before closing his phone and standing up. 

“I’m going to the restroom real quick, are you going to be okay by yourself?” Kenma asked.

 You waved him off as you settled down into your seat. You would be fine, this was an amusement park afterall. Nothing bad ever happened at these kinds of places right?

 You were wrong.

 You were definitely wrong about that statement. 

 It had only been a couple of minutes of being alone before an arm draped over your shoulders. 

 You stiffened and looked to see a guy around your age sitting next to you. His friend sitting  across from you.

 “What’s a cute girl like you sitting all alone for? Did your boyfriend leave you?” he teased. 

 You frowned, shifting your body away from the male. “No. He went to go get us food.” 

 “Where? I don’t see him.” his friend said looking around halfheartedly. “Why don’t you come hang out with us?”

 You glanced around to see that people weren’t paying attention to the uncomfortable situation you were in. 

 And Kuroo and Kenma were still gone…

 “No thanks. I suggest you leave before my boyfriend gets here.” you said dryly, crossing your arms over your chest. A hard expression covering your face.

 “Oh come on, don’t be like that.” the one that was sitting next to you cooed, shifting closer to you and grabbing your chin. “We can show you a real good time…”

 You flinched away from his touch, fear and annoyance overtaking your body. 

 While you didn’t tolerate being talked to this way, it was still incredibly scary considering that you were outmatched right now.

You ignored the feeling of dread sinking deep within your stomach and was about to start telling off the two males when a tray full of food was slammed down in front of you, causing you to jump in fright.

 “What the fuck do you think you’re doing to my girlfriend?” 

 You had never seen Kuroo so pissed before. His cat-like eyes were piercing as they glared down at the unwelcomed males. His expression was dark and angry. 

 It was a frightening image to behold.

 Behind the angry and towering male was Kenma. His eyes watching the two males with a calculating expression before flickering over to you, walking from around Kuroo he stood next to you, carefully pressing his hand against your elbow and tugging you gently away from the table. 

 Kuroo’s eyes briefly moved to yours checking to make sure you were okay and not hurt before moving back to the males that were beginning to look frightened.

 Kuroo’s confrontation finally brought other eyes to your area, the people around you looking on which made the harassers even more nervous.

 “Do you two losers usually go around touching girls that don’t want to be touched?” Kuroo asked coldly, this caused an eruption of whispers to take place around you guys, older adults getting ready to step into the situation.

 “How about I show you guys a good time…” he said darkly, cracking the knuckles of his right hand.

 You have never seen boys run away as fast as they just did. 

 You released the breath you had apparently been holding during that encounter. You watched Kuroo’s expression go from dark and cold to loving and worried as he turned his attention to you.

 “You okay doll?” he asked gently cupping your face. 

 You nodded softly. “Y-Yeah. Let’s eat. I don’t want this to ruin our day.” you smiled slightly.

Kuroo stared at you for a moment before nodding slowly. He shared a pointed look with Kenma but didn’t press the matter further.

 You were definitely not okay.

 **********

 All too soon the day had ended. You and Kuroo found yourselves outside of your house.

 “Do you want to come in? My parents won’t be home until later tonight.” you said quietly.

 “Oya? Are you trying to seduce me Y/n-chan?” Kuroo smirked leaning down towards you.

 You flushed brightly, slapping his chest. “Shut up Tetsuro. Do you want to come in or not?”

 He laughed loudly at your embarrassed face. “Fine. Fine.”

 You rolled your eyes as you guys stepped into your house. It wasn’t the first time Kuroo had been to your home, he immediately made himself comfortable as he went upstairs to your bedroom.

 “I feel gross. Will you be fine out here if I go shower?” you asked, setting down the prizes you had gotten at the park.

 Kuroo dismissed you as he picked up one of your comics you had laying around, making himself comfortable on top of your bed. You rolled your eyes as you left to the bathroom after grabbing a change of clothes.

 Kuroo felt his phone buzz in his pocket. 

 Don’t leave Y/n alone tonight. She definitely wasn’t okay after what had happened. Kenma texted.

 Kuroo frowned and glanced towards the closed bedroom door, he knew that you weren’t okay. If he was being honest, the rest of the day he was waiting for you to break down crying.

 Kuroo knew that you were a strong person, that was one of the many things he loved about you. But a situation like that, would leave anyone frightened. He noticed that too, the way you would jump slightly at his sudden touch, and the way that you would glance around worriedly.

 Of course he wasn’t going to leave you alone tonight. Before that had happened he had planned on coming over anyway, he wanted to spend as much time with you as possible, and considering that tomorrow was the weekend, he thought it was the perfect time. 

 Kuroo didn’t notice you walk in until you plopped yourself on the bed, drying your damp hair.

 He smirked slightly as he took in your clothes, your soft legs were exposed due to the shorts you opted to wear to bed, and his familiar volleyball shirt hung down your body.

 “Did you steal that?” he teased, setting down the comic book. “I was wondering where that shirt went.”

 “Nooo…” you said, averting your eyes. “You left it here.”

 “Lying doesn’t suit your sweet face doll,” Kuroo drawled out, sitting up from the many pillows on your bed and clasping warm fingers around your wrist. “Who knew that my girlfriend was a thief.” he smirked and yanked you into his lap.

 You fell into him with a loud ‘oomph,’ your face squishing against his hard chest, and then you melted against him.

 Sighing softly to yourself, you shifted against him comfortably, straddling his hips as you wrapped your arms around his muscular shoulders, your head laying against his chest.

 Kuroo’s hands rested on your upper thighs carefully, thumbs rubbing gentle circles into the skin.

 You both were quiet for a moment, just appreciating the comfort and warmth of being in each other’s arms.

 “You know, you don’t have to act tough around me right?” he said suddenly. “I know what happened earlier freaked you out.”

You stiffened and relaxed against his chest. Kuroo just knew you too well.

 “Yeah.” you said quietly. “I just didn’t want you to worry… and I didn’t want to ruin the day…”

 You remembered the way that guy had touched you so casually, and despite the shower you had taken, and the way you had all but scrubbed your skin raw, you still felt gross.

 Kuroo sighed, pushing you back slightly so he could stare at your face. “I already know that you’re a crybaby. Kenma does too. You’re forgetting that we’ve known each other since we were kids.” he said bluntly.

 You huffed angrily at his statement and whacked his chest with your palm, causing a wide smirk to appear on his face. “I’m not a crybaby!”

 “If you’re not feeling okay, it’s okay to tell us,” he finished, ignoring you completely. “It’s okay to tell me, because I’m always going to take care of you. Yeah?”

 The sincerity in his voice and the gentle expression on his handsome face caused you to blush. Your eyes moved away from his and settled on staring at his chin as you tried to get your racing heart under control.

 Your fingers played with his hair at the nape of his neck. The way you felt about Kuroo was indescribable, the admiration and adoration you had for the third year volleyball captain was too much. It felt like your heart was about to explode from how much you just loved him.

 “Thank you Tetsuro.” You said finally meeting his gaze. “I love you a lot.” you confessed.

 He smiled gently at you, pressing a warm kiss to your forehead. “I love you too.”

 It was quiet for a moment as you rested your head against his shoulder, breathing in his familiar scent.

 “If you want to thank me properly, you should take off your shirt. Well actually it’s my shirt.”

 ....

 “Shut up Tetsuro or I’ll tell Kenma."

[canyouhearthelight]

The Miys, Ch. 149

So, I was super busy on my normal queueing day and wasn’t able to set this up. And by ‘super busy’ I mean ‘doing laundry, weeding flower beds, and taking several naps’, bc I have upwards of 24 niblings and a super-full time job that make me exhausted.

I’m not kidding, I recently told @baelpenrose “I had a birthday party to go to, yes it’s the third Saturday in a row, don’t worry about keeping track because there are SO MANY”. 

What doesn’t make me exhausted? Y’all. The likes, the comments, the reblogs, the ‘hey, this person reads my stuff AND Bael’s stuff’ ( @feral-possums-in-the-bog, @drbibliophile, looking at you in a very loving way). Also the speedrunners... all of you who have ever, at any point, found this fic and decided to read every single chapter as quickly as possible ( and have or haven’t shamed me for needing to update the masterpost or page links), you keep me going like nothing else. I, too, like a good binge read, so I know I’ve done something worth... something... when someone else binges like that.

“So the Ark is semi-organic?” I glanced over and resisted the urge to trail my fingers along the walls of the corridor.

“That would be the closest Terran approximation, yes,” they confirmed. “It is not sentient in any form, but all exposed surfaces, for example, are grown in-place of a material native to our home planet.”

“So cool,” I whispered. “Is there a benefit to that, aside from being more sustainable?”

Noah rubbed two liw alongside their sensory organs, and let out a soft buzz - essentially rubbing their face with a sigh. “It is very rare for any species that achieves sentience to reach a level of technology that allows for faster than light travel without what you refer to as sustainability being included in every aspect of their culture.”

“Oh.” I felt ashamed and focused on my feet for a few steps, paying close attention to the feeling of the deck plating through my soles, any uneven textures that I came across turning into canyons of perception.

“In the case of the material coating the surfaces of the Ark,” Noah continued, clearly picking up on my discomfort, “it serves a largely hygienic function, much as Else currently provides.”

“So, that’s what Xio was referring to when she said that Hujylsogox ships largely decontaminate themselves?”

“Indeed. Where my species absorbs impurities from the air and any surfaces we come in contact with, the lining of the corridors, rooms, and vents can purify the rest within a Galactic week.” That worked out to eleven and two-third days as we currently measured them on the Ark, or fourteen and a half days on Earth. “Biofiltration is a very common way to sanitize spaces that often house multiple species to avoid destructive interactions, although the coating we use is known to be the most efficient organic solution.”

Surrendering, I ran my fingers over the wall.  Even knowing that it was grown, it still felt like sandstone under my touch. “If it is so efficient, why don’t the Ekomari use it on their ships?”

Their fingers on both vomu clacked as they tapped them together. “In absence of another organism to ingest the larger particulates, sypo is what you would consider to be too efficient.”

“Feathers clog it up?”

“Like you would not believe,” they hummed deeply - a groan, clear as day. “It actually ends up starving the sypo.”

Unbidden, my mind’s eye flashed back to the nightmares that Else had shown me early on: large flakes of the walls falling away and littering the corridor floors. “So, that was a very real thing?” There didn’t seem to be any reason to clarify, given how clearly the images had blared in my head.

“Correct. We believe that Else understood the nature of the material and was trying to show you what was happening in a way they thought you would understand.” A heavy liw gently patted my shoulder. “They meant well, even if they did not realize that it would backfire.”

I was about to ask what the Ekomari use in place of sypo as a biofilter, but my databand signaled me. Judging by the fact that it chimed, flashed, and vibrated against the bones in my wrist, this was incredibly urgent. “I’m sorry, Noah, one mom - ah, fuck…” Pinching the bridge of my nose, I mentally braced myself for what I knew would be coming in the next several days.

“Wisdom, you are distressed.”

“Departmental notification from Pranav and Zach that they will be doing system security testing over the next week. Which means Derek will be doing his best to hack into our systems and take them out, while Pranav and Zach take notes of vulnerabilities and then fix them afterward.”

The face-rubbing sigh was back. “They are not including basic ship functions in this testing, correct?”

I shook my head, relieved that I could at least provide that assurance. “Negative. Only the systems that humans will be replicating on our own once we are on Von.”

“This is still terribly inconvenient. These tests increase tension across the Ark to quite difficult levels to be around.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. It’s mostly from what happened Before, at least for the older members of the crew.  I mean, we got a Global Parliament out of it, but… there were a scary few years before we got there. And then the End happened, and the hack felt like some kind of warning looking back.”

Noah buzzed thoughtfully. “You are speaking of the gap in data we found when we were trying to download your planetary database.”

A part of me wanted to laugh at the fact that Miys continued to refer to the internet as a ‘planetary database’, but the topic was so upsetting that any kind of joy felt obscene right then. “It was… another terrorist attack, honestly.  They weren’t unusual, as terrifying as that is - I mean, you admitted yourself that not all of us were worth saving.  There was a petrochemical hack maybe five years before this one, and the attacks had been ramping up slowly even before that.  But this one.”  I shook my head trying to clear the thoughts from my head. “What we were told is that this group knew we would never take action against climate change, something about how the rich corporate would never take it seriously until they had to actually live in the nature they were destroying.”

“You are doubtful of this.” Noah’s statement was far from being a question.

Couldn’t blame him, since I didn’t believe half of what we had been told, or maybe that it was only half the story. “I wasn’t old enough to remember, but it is a recorded fact that there were actual people on Earth who had more wealth than any single country on the planet, and one was particularly known for building his fortune on the backs of employees who were worked to death or nearly to death.  It’s hard to believe that had nothing to do with it, you know.”

“If being reminded of this event causes such distress among your people, why run so many tests?”

“The hack killed people, Noah. It destroyed entire small countries, caused a lot of violence and wars. The ultra-rich may have been the targets, but the casualties were mostly people who never knew what was happening.  We want to make sure it can’t happen again.  That’s why we warn everyone what’s going on, so they know it’s not the same thing, but still do the testing.”

More clattering of vomu signaled Noah thinking again. “Your global economy depended strongly on the concept of wealth and the concept of money.  But with the current economic model you exercise, such a data security breach would not impact it.”

I shrugged. “We still worry. Not to mention the fact that, at some point, someone may try. We can try all we want to avoid the catalyst of the original events, but some of our better qualities can be just as terrible with just a twist.  Curiosity, confidence, and justice and easily turn into pride, vindictiveness, and prying. Which can lead to blackmail. And that’s just one example. Still sure we’re worth it?”

Another thoughtful buzz with some mild clicking. “I have seen your people endeavor to save a species that could have destroyed you.  I have seen you, specifically, mourn someone who deliberately attempted to end not only your life but the lives of the entire Ark.  There is much evidence to give us faith in your compassion.”

All I could do was shake my head. “I’ll try to have faith in your faith,” I murmured with a weak smile.

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[jenomark]

➔Pairing: Taeyong x Reader ➔Other Members/ Characters: Ten | Johnny  ➔Genre: Smut (w/ plot!) ➔Warnings: Weight is mentioned a lot | Self-esteem & Self-worth issues | Could be triggering for people with weight issues | Fingering | Vaginal sex | Oral (M) ➔Word count: 4,321

➔Summary: For many reasons, you haven’t had sex in a long time. Though you love yourself and your bigger body, you’re always aware that other people might not. After a bad night with someone who didn’t want to be seen in public with you, your best friend Ten offers to set you up with his friend Taeyong. 

*This is very body positive, but it does deal with a lot of negative things that are very close to reality for most people. I tried to portray things as accurately as I can, given my own experiences. I know not everyone’s experience is like mine. It’s a very honest outlook on having a one-night-stand or FWB relationship while being a bigger girl. 

  Mr. No Name. He hit all the right notes and strokes. He was attractive and mildly interesting. More importantly, he said he didn’t care what you looked like, or that it had been awhile since you’d had sex. His clothes flew off mid-air, and you watched them land here and there. Mistakes never landed in one spot, you thought. They peppered your life like seasoning, and even so, life had been tasteless, as of late. You still found yourself craving the morsel that would poison you.

“Can you give me a moment?” you asked.

  Nameless stretched across your bed like a God, his arms draped out in what he must have pretended was satin. IKEA might have felt honored. When he spoke, he told you to hurry back quickly. He said he didn’t have that much time, but you suspected he was the type to fuck and leave. 

  “Okay.” you said.

  You left your bedroom, not really thinking that you’d just left a stranger to rummage through your personal belongings. You went into the bathroom and turned off all the lights. You didn’t want to look at your body stuffed into the lingerie you carefully picked out for the occasion. You didn’t want to know what he saw when he looked at you. You hated that you were that girl, but old habits die hard, or rather, they come back from the dead and pick you apart until you’re just bone.

  Sex. It never mattered much to you. You would consume it when it came, just a notch above feeling grateful that someone would stick themselves inside of you. You didn’t know if it didn’t matter because it didn’t, or because you couldn’t fathom caring so much about someone that didn’t care for you back. It was easier to skip the hurt altogether and go straight for the parts where you ate the ice cream without the excuse.

“Get a grip.” you told yourself in the darkness.

  It had been awhile since you’d had sex because, despite being happy in your own skin, you were still terrified of someone seeing you naked. It was hell to explain how fulfilled you felt as your own person until a man looked at you and diminished your worth by calling you the most unfuckable person in the room. It was so easy for someone to tear down years of hard work and self-reflection for a two second shame fest by a stranger in a passing car, yelling about your weight, or what you should and shouldn’t be eating. And, yes, you hated that you cared what people thought of you, even after all this time.

 Enter: Mr. No Name. You called him that because he gave you an alias to call him by, and the fake name didn’t sit well with you. You wanted to ask him why he didn’t want you to know him, but deep down, you already knew. No one wants to be seen with the fat girl. You knew you were completely right when you asked him for coffee, and he looked as if you’d asked him to march around town with a parade float tied to his leg. Not everyone would look at the straight-sized man and the plus-sized girl and think negatively, but there would always be people who were still looking. Maybe you didn’t want to be seen as much as he didn’t want to be seen. Maybe you were also the problem.

 Still, you were horny and touch starved. After all, all you wanted from him was sex. That was the agreement. And you loathed yourself for briefly wanting more, for looking at him and his desire for you, and thinking that it could extend beyond the bedroom. Silly you for wanting what some people had. You had to forgive your own poor self-esteem and hope that others would, too.

 When you went back to your bedroom, he had passed out on your pillow. He was hugging the other one, his naked body smooth against the fabric. In his sleep, the prospect of him didn’t seem as scary as you thought. You wouldn’t hold it against him. You woke him and told him to put his clothes back on. 

“So what?” he said. “Things don’t work out. It wasn’t meant to be.”

  You looked over at Ten and felt that he was completely missing the point. It was your fault. You were never honest about how you felt because you didn’t want to bring attention to it. He knew your lingering insecurities as well as anyone, but there were things he could never truly understand. Last thing you wanted was for someone to pity you, or worse, think you’re just making it all up in your head. 

“I want sex,” you said. “I think I’m drying up down there.”

“Dating apps.” Ten said, as if his genius idea would save you. 

“Absolutely not.”

“You have to start somewhere.”

“I’m not a fetish,” you said. “Dating apps make me realize why I don’t date in the first place.”

“If you wait for things to happen organically, you might miss out,” Ten said. “Do people still do newspaper ads?”

“Are newspapers even a thing?” you asked.

  You and Ten looked at each other and shrugged. There were so many things you understood about each other. You sat down and wiped sweat from your forehead. You were supposed to be cleaning your apartment. There was something about deep cleaning that soothed you. And Ten was supposed to be helping, but he was sipping his hot tea and playing around on his phone.

“Can I be honest with you?” you asked.

  It felt like now or never. He didn’t need to know everything, just a little bit where you were coming from. There were sirens going off in your head telling you not to say anything to him. Your big mouth couldn’t stop once you were dead set on something.

“Always,” he said, putting his phone down. “Is this about the date?”

You nodded. “It’s about me, too. I’m..I don’t love the body I’m in..sometimes..other times, I love her. She gets me from point A to B. She makes me feel sexy. Forget what makes you healthy and what doesn’t. I don’t listen to anyone else but my doctor. All I know is that I love myself, from my ridiculous long second toe, to my double chin. All of it. And I think that scares people away, and I think I let them scare me away, too.”

“Was he that bad?” he asked.

“He didn’t want to be seen with me. Before we entered my apartment, he asked if anyone knew he was there,” you said. “ I would have cried if I was any other person. You know, I’m not even mad that he was like that. At this point, I expect that more than I don’t. I’m mad that, for one moment in time, I really expected him to be different. He kept saying how much he loved my body, and I didn’t get fetish feelings from him. I thought, “Wow, he could really be the one. He could be the fuck buddy of a lifetime.” Despite fucking it up in so many other ways, he made me feel like a person. I felt wanted.”

“He sounds like a dick.” Ten said.

Slowly, you nodded in agreement. At the same time, you and Ten sipped your drinks, lost in thought. 

Then, as if he remembered something important, Ten tilted his head and said, “I know a man.”

“That’s great,” you said, dryly. “I know a lot of men, too.”

‘“No,” he said, slapping the table. “I have a friend.”

  You raised your eyebrows. You thought about being sarcastic, but Ten wasn’t paying attention. It was no fun if he didn’t play back. He was excited by his own thought process, the wheels in his head spinning. 

“You just want sex!” he said.

“Correct.”

“With someone who will be seen with you in public,” he continued. “So they don’t kill your lady boner. I know a friend who will do that for you.”

“No.” you said, flatly.

“Why not?”

“I’m not a charity case,” you said. “I don’t want a man to fuck me just because he feels bad.”

“This guy isn’t like that.”

  You wanted to say that all guys were like that, but that way of thinking didn’t help anyone. It wasn’t true. You knew there were men out there who were what you wanted, you just didn’t know why they were halfway around the world. You thought of Ten’s friends, which were also your friends, by default.

“Which friend?” you asked. “All of them are with someone. Besides, I wouldn’t have sex with any of them. It would be too weird.”

“You don’t know him.”

“But I know all of your friends.”

“Not this one,” Ten said. “He’s in my art class. You’ll love him. Come to Saturday’s class. I’ll introduce you.”

  They say fat girls shouldn’t wear overalls. You looked at your tummy in the reflection of a car and pressed your hands against it. Your thighs looked like they were bulging in the little shorts. You shook your head to rid yourself of the thought demons that tried to make you think you were anything less than sexy. Whenever it came to the opinion of men, unfortunately, they liked to show up and rear their ugly heads. You looked adorable in your overalls, and you’d look smokin’ hot out of them.

 You weren’t good at art, so you didn’t know how to dress up, or how to behave. You showed up and stood by a bunch of people smoking cigarettes and gossiping. You thought the atmosphere would be more like the movies, and you thanked yourself you didn’t show up in some ridiculous scarf and a beret. 

“You’re earlier than I am,” Ten said, hugging you from behind. “That’s not something I can get used to. You look like an art ho.”

“What is an art ho?” you asked.

  Self-consciously, your eyes started going towards your reflection. Ten took your arm and led you inside, past the smokers, and right through a door into a cool and brightly lit studio. Ten came every week, and you could see why. The place had a cheery vibe, and everyone around you was smiling and sitting down at an easel. There was food in the corner of the room and all of these prints on the wall that you could look at for hours.

“So,” you said, sitting down. “We just...paint things?”

“Yes, “Ten said. “We get a theme for the day. No rules. No stress or worries. It doesn’t matter what it looks like. All that matters is that you have fun.”

“That’s easy for you to say, you’re a great artist.” 

Ten blushed. “I try my best.”

  Taking your place and watching everyone slowly trickle into the class, you noticed how attractive everyone was. You didn’t know what Ten’s friend looked like. You didn’t even know his name. You imagined him in your head, building him up like a clay figure. He had eyes and a nose, he was tall and resembled a beautiful marble statue. You looked around the room and realized there were mostly couples, their eyes finding each other wherever they went. Your eyes kept swimming around the room, too, even as the class began. And that’s when you saw him.

“Whoa.” you said underneath your breath.

  He was beautiful. He was tall, like you imagined. So much of his broad shouldered body peeked out from behind his easel. He had black hair, which he swept back from his forehead. He had a smile permanently fixed to his face, and the warmest brown eyes you had ever seen. You physically gulped before nudging Ten.

“Who is that?” you asked. 

Ten smirked. “That’s Johnny. All the girls love him.”

  You were all the girls. You couldn’t stop staring at him. You wondered if painting him would be too creepy. As class began, you tried focusing on the project at hand, but your eyes kept going back to him.

“I need to get laid, “ you whispered. “I need to get laid so badly.”

“Will you relax,” Ten whispered back. “I don’t need you climaxing in front of my class. I think that’s frowned upon.”

  You forgot about Johnny as best as you could and painted the sexiest fruit bowl of your life. You were proud, tired, and most of all, itching at the chance to talk to Johnny. You were thankful for Ten in that moment, so thankful that you could have kissed him. But, your attention was not on Ten. You were thinking about Johnny’s big body slamming you down onto your bed and fucking the still life out of you.

“I want you to meet him now.” Ten said. 

  You stood fast, your knee knocking into the easel. Several people looked your way because of the loud noise. You waved and tried to shake off the embarrassment. Johnny stood too, his face a model of perfection. He was so happy that it was infectious.

“He’s a little too attractive.” you said. 

“Johnny?” Ten asked. “I guess so.”

  Ten ushered you forward. As you were getting ready to extend your hand out to Johnny, Ten kept pushing until you were in front of the easel at the end. A man stood up and wiped his hands on his jeans.

“Hello, “ he said. “I’m Taeyong.”

  You were speechless. You cursed yourself for automatically thinking it was Johnny. The look on your face must have said it all, because Ten needed to cover for you. He told Taeyong your name after fixing you with the longest side-eye in human history.

“Taeyong,” you said. “Right. I’m sorry. I’m just...so..in love with your painting.”

  You looked at his painting. It was chaotic. The fruit were different colors and they were all smashed, the seeds ripped out, and the juices flowing. He had more paint on his hands and arms than what was on the canvas. 

“This?” he asked. “Thank you. Painting gives me energy.”

  Ten put his hand on your shoulder and said he was going to clean up his station. You couldn’t recover from the initial embarrassment, so you offered to go help him.

“It’s okay if you don’t like what you see,” Taeyong said. “I understand.”

  Ten gave you one last “I will fuck you up if you ruin this for yourself” glance before disappearing. Everything in you felt apologetic towards Taeyong. It wasn’t even about him. 

“It’s not you.” you said.

Taeyong laughed. “That’s usually how the saying goes.”

“No!” you said. “Really, it’s not you. You’re wonderful.”

  And you meant it. Though he was different from Johnny and different from what you expected, Taeyong was very handsome. In your mind, you didn’t judge the way he looked because you didn’t want him to do the same to you. You knew how it felt too well, which is why it hurt you that he was feeling that way.

“Can I be honest?” you said. “I think I fucked this up. Ten didn’t tell me anything about you, and I thought you were someone else.”

“Ahh,” Taeyong said. “Imagine the disappointment.”

  You could feel yourself growing dizzy.  You took a seat in the chair next to Taeyong. When you stood, you were a little taller than him. When you sat, your body felt massive in front of his smaller frame. You looked into his face, into his eyes which didn’t look as upset as they should have been.

“I’m an idiot,” you said. “All these years wanting people to censor themselves for me, and I end up doing it to someone else. Can we start over?”

Taeyong sat. He placed his hands between his thighs and nodded. The way he moved was so cute that you couldn’t help but smile.

“Taeyong,” you said. “Would you like to come home with me?”

“Y-e-eesss.” he said, drawing the world out cutely.

  You found yourself back in your bedroom, in a role that seemed too familiar. You were starting to feel scared that Taeyong only came back because of some fat fetish. He had been seen with you in public, had even reached for your hand on the walk back to your apartment, but fear had a way of resurfacing in intimate spaces. 

“This is nice,” Taeyong said, gesturing up at the painting above your bed. “I draw on my walls, but this is much more sophisticated.”

  You couldn’t seem to talk. Your mouth was dry. You asked him if he wanted a drink so that you could have one to loosen up. He said he didn’t drink much because his neck got all splotchy and red. You skipped the drink and disappeared into the bathroom, like a coward.

“We’re here again,” you said to yourself. “Just fuck him al-”

  There was a knock at the bathroom door. You turned on the lights and opened it slowly to see Taeyong standing there. 

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“I’m good.”

“It’s just that,” he said. “You’re talking to yourself. I talk to myself sometimes, too. Do you want to do this another time?”

  He looked so sweet that something in you just toppled over the edge. You didn’t say no. You didn’t say yes. You crossed the threshold and kissed him, grabbing the back of his head. The kiss itself was so soft and tame that you kept trying to make it more aggressive. Taeyong released his lips from yours and rubbed his mouth. He laughed nervously and looked down at the floor. His lips were red and swollen, his eyes more lustful than before when he finally looked back up at you. He stepped forward and kissed you, pressing his body up against yours. Normally, feeling someone's tummy against yours would make you retreat, but you were so lost in the moment that you didn’t notice. 

“Bedroom?” Taeyong asked.

“Yes.”

  It was Taeyong who guided you to your own bedroom. Your eyes went straight to the painting above your bed. There was a new appreciation for it. When you looked back to Taeyong, he was looking at you like he was looking at art: admiring, questioning.

“You’re nervous,” he asked. “Why?”

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone.” you said.

  You and Taeyong sat on the edge of your bed. You were itching to kiss him, but you felt that the questions on the tip of his tongue would get in the way.

“Being nervous is okay,” he said. “But I want you to know that I’ll take my time and make it enjoyable for you.”

  He leaned in to kiss you, his hand pushing your hair out of the way so that he could rest it on your cheek. Your hand was on his thigh. Things started escalating, like you were both trying to one-up the other. Taeyong’s hand was on your breast, trying to figure out the machinations of the overalls. You were rubbing his leg a little too much. He had to ask you to stop or he'd explode. You laid back on the bed and let him hover above your body. Your thighs felt extra jiggly when his hands caressed you. You felt yourself clamming up, and Taeyong sensed it and stopped.

“I’m not entirely comfortable with my body sometimes.” you admitted. 

“Do you want to stop?” Taeyong asked. “We can watch movies or play board games?”

“Board games?” you asked.

He shrugged. “I like games.”

 You wanted to laugh. Taeyong was much different from Mr. No Name. Being with him felt less like a performance. It was like you were being intimate with a friend, only intimacy looked a lot like awkwardness. 

“I don’t want to stop,” you said. “Do you?”

“No.” Taeyong said.

  He sloped down to kiss you. His hand continued moving up your thigh and into your shorts. Having someone's fingers inside of you after not having anything for so long felt like an epiphany. You moaned and stopped kissing Taeyong. Not because you wanted to stop exploring his mouth, but because you couldn’t contain your excitement. You opened your legs and let him finger you, his skinny and long fingers jerking in and out of you with zeal. 

“Don’t stop,” you moaned. “Don’t stop.”

  You came around his fingers quickly, your hand reaching out to grab his wrist. He delicately kissed the side of your neck, double chin and all. You took a minute to catch your breath, but Taeyong was all over you. He unhooked your overalls. He lifted up your shirt to reveal your stomach. Checking to see if it was okay with you first, he kissed your soft flesh. You moved further up the bed so that his face was down below. He helped you remove the outfit, and you finished it off, sitting up on your bed naked and fighting the urge to cover yourself.

“Don’t tell me I’m beautiful,” you said. “Don’t say anything at all about my body. Tell me about yours.”

  Taeyong smiled in understanding. He yanked his shirt over his head and pointed at his scar. The pink jagged line was shiny. You yearned to place your lips against it. 

“A scar,” he said. He brought his hands up his body, his ribs noticeable. Seductively, he brought his hand back down until his fingers caught on his zipper. It didn’t take much for Taeyong’s baggy pants to fall to the ground. He slipped off his briefs to reveal his soft cock. “Can I show you my body?”

“Yes.”

  He was going to come to you, but you scooted to the edge of the bed. You didn’t love the way your body looked while you were sitting, but your attention was saved by Taeyong’s cock. You took over, working him in your hands, and watching as he came to life. You leaned down to suck him, enjoying how he whimpered from the warmth of your mouth. You stopped momentarily to kiss his scar before you were back at it, drawing him closer and closer. Before he could spill, you let him go and climbed back onto the bed on all fours, your ass facing him. The position was easiest for you. You didn’t have to look at men when they fucked you, your fat moving rabidly, and your mind wondering how distracted they were by your body. You waited for him to come to you and thrust his cock into you from behind, but Taeyong didn’t. 

“I want you on top,” he said. “I want to see you.”

  You watched Taeyong lay on your bed, his body just below the painting. He was relaxing in a bunch of pillows, and he was smiling. If you went on top of him, his small frame seemed like it would disappear underneath you. The thought of your thick thighs rubbing against him made you queasy. Yet, there was something so sexy about him wanting you that carried you forward. It was an interesting situation. 

“Are you sure?” you asked.

Taeyong lifted his arms behind his head. “Ride me.”

  You gripped his thighs and climbed on top of him. You were hyper aware of your body touching his. You lifted your ass up and tried to situate yourself. As you did, Taeyong’s hands were all over you. He poked and prodded you, smoothing his fingers over your skin and exploring everything there was to see and not see. At first, you froze in place. You had never had anyone feel your body like that, like a painter painting a canvas. You could feel his brush strokes as you closed your eyes, his fingers moving over your nipples, and the way he touched you when he went between your legs. 

  Lowering yourself down onto his cock, you had to slowly let him in. Every inch was felt, moving inside of you so intensely that every time you moved back up just a little, you wanted to lurch forward in pleasure. Taeyong held your waist and kept his hands there as you rocked over him slowly. 

“I forgot how good this felt.” you said.

  You hadn’t ridden someone since university. It was the second time ever, and the first time with someone you could actually see yourself liking. You tried pushing the L-word thoughts out of your head. You and Taeyong were only having sex, not dating. 

“Faster.” Taeyong said, the words coming out of his mouth surprising him.

  You rode him faster, trying not to think too hard about the way your body bounced, or how it looked. He touched you as you fucked him, his hands getting increasingly more desperate. The way he looked up at you made you feel bold. You pressed down on his chest and started fucking yourself on his cock with a new pace, your body slamming down on him hard. The sounds of your bodies slapping together was loud, and at one point, you slowed down because you were scared you were hurting him.

“No,” he moaned. “Keep going.”

  You fucked him until you came, throwing your head back and riding the wave. Taeyong watched you with awe, even when you didn’t stop moving. You wanted him to come, wanted to finish him off the way he deserved.

“Give it to me,” you said, fucking him. “I want it, Taeyong. Come for me.”

  You pushed your breasts against his chest and kissed him. The moan that broke free from his lips was loud and whiny. You kissed his neck and kept taking his cock until he came, his body stiffening before relaxing. You let him stay inside of you long after he had come, his fingertips drawing love hearts on your skin.

“I was thinking,” Taeyong said. “Tomorrow we should get that drink.”

[catxsnow]

if you don't have too many of the halloween number requests in - can you do 10 with dick ? 🥺

10."Stop touching me" "...that wasn't me"

This was longer than it was supposed to be but ya know... that’ll happen. 

Dick Grayson wasn't afraid of anything.

Even from a young age he had no fears. Gravity-defying flips and trick up with his parents in front of large crowds than the eye could see. Train hopping, leaping from person to person and out running monsters before he even knew what a monster truly was. Becoming Robin? That only defied his fears even more.

Dick lived his life with his head held high and a smile on his face no matter the circumstance. He lived for defying the odds and proving that there was nothing that could stop him. That was something that only got greater and greater as he got older and so more of the true evils the world had to offer.

And there was nothing you loved to do more than prove him wrong.

Dick had to have gotten scared in his life. Sure, there were times that he thought that he wasn't going to make it out alive but he had never truly been scared. It was frustrating that he wouldn't make a single movement when scared while there were times that you screamed out in fright.

It didn't matter. This was the year that you were going to get him absolutely petrified. You wanted to hear him scream in fear. There had been so many times that he had laughed at your 'insensible' fear. This time, it was time for him to be scared.

Unfortunately, that meant for you that you had to sit though several hours of the scariest movies of all time. Dick didn't think anything of it, you guys often watched scary movies together that time of the year. Usually, it was him that would suggest it but he never said no if you did. These were the times that he got to enjoy you cuddling up against him and hiding into his chest.

It was a horrible experience for you. Sitting through those scenes were terrible, even when Dick promised to keep you safe if there were ever such an occurrence. His arm was tightly wrapped around you, making it easy to cower into him when scenes became too scary. He'd kiss the top of your head while stifling a laugh.

As soon as the second movie ended, you had enough - and you wanted to put your plan into action.

Dick slept on the opposite side of the bed - something that happened quite often when he ran hot at night. As much as he enjoyed cuddling you, it was impossible to sleep on hotter nights. He kissed you a final time, whispering that he loved you before curling up. You laid flat on your back, waiting for everything to fall into place.

"Babe," Dick grumbled not even twenty minutes later. "Stop touching me. You know I'm ticklish there." You could feel him shuffle around on his side of the bed, trying to slap away the hands that touched his bare sides.

"That wasn't me," You informed, completely on your side of the bed. Dick flipped around again, reaching for your hands that were in fact no where near him. He jolted against as a distinct cold palm pressed flat over his heart. This time, he jumped up and turned the night light on. "What's wrong babe?"

"Nothing," Dick surveyed the room. "I thought I just felt something. Come here," he turned the light off again and pulled you against his chest. Your hands were clearly trapped between yourself and him, unable to do anything - not that you needed to. Dick held you closer than before, and you could feel the bump of his heart.

This time, he felt the cold hand trail up his spine and a icy breeze against his neck. Dick shot up again, this time he knew for sure that there was something that touched him. You looked confused at him as he turned the light back on. His hair was disheveled from the flipping around and he looked worried.

"Did those movies get to you, babe?" You asked, reaching out for his hand. Your touch was warm, nothing like the freezing cold one he felt only moments ago. Dick ran a hand down his face and tried to shake off the feeling that there was someone - or something - was in the room with you.

"No," he shook his head. "Just cold."

It took all your effort not to break out in laughter. Everything was going perfectly. Dick was unsettled - something that didn't happen very often. If ever. Now, after just a few simple touches and the idea of paranormal horror filling his mind, he was rattled. This was better than anything you could imagine.

Dick turned the light off once more and slid down on the bed. His arm was tucked behind his bed and the other around you as you cuddled into his side. His heart rate was far more erratic than it was before and you were sure that his eyes were wide open, trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

Fake, quiet snores past your lips. It was believable enough that Dick truly thought you asleep. He 'woke' you when an ear splitting scream rattled into him. He jumped up so fast that you nearly fell off the bed. This time he was standing up, frantically searching your room for whatever the hell was in there.

"What the fuck, Dick?" You groaned, pretending to wipe sleep out of your eyes. The light above your bed was flicking on and he was rummaging through everything in the room.

"Did you not hear that scream?" He looked at you with wide eyes. Of course you had - probably everyone of your neighbors had as well. However, you feigned confused and shook your head. "What? It sounded like a child screaming. How did you not hear that?"

"There was no scream, Dick," You shook your head. "Babe come back to bed, I'm sure it's just the movies getting you worked up. There's nothing here besides me and you."

"No, no there was definitely a scream," Dick argued. he continued to ransack your room until reaching the closet. His hand hovered over the handle as if he was scared to open it. A grin was on your face - knowing exactly what was about to happen. Finally, he gripped the handle and whipped the door open.

And there it was. Dick's most perfect, horrified scream.

HIs voice went high-pitched and he fell backwards at the fright. Dick crawled away from the closet and towards your bed. It was at that point that you couldn't hold your laughter any longer. He looked at you as if you were crazy.

It was M'gann that came out of the closet - well a version of her. She had morphed herself into being the same kind of horrific ghost from the movie you had just watched. However, she too couldn't stop her laughter, and changed back to herself. Dick suddenly understood everything. You had planned this.

Watching the movies to get him deep in though. Getting M'gann to turn invisible to get him worked up through ghostly touches. The scream. Hiding in the closet, knowing damn well that he would search it. You had pranked him, damn well too.

Dick felt as if his heart was going to pound out of his chest. He sat up on the edge of your bed and sighed in defeat. You wrapped your arms around him from behind and kissed his cheek. "Sorry, babe. I had to! I've never seen you scared before and let me tell you - it was worth it.

"M'gann that was awesome!" You grinned at her. "Thank you, so much."

"Hey, it was fun for me too. Sorry, Dick," She giggled a final time before giving her goodbyes. Dick fell back into your bed. After everything that he's faced in life, how did something like that give him the scare of his life? And how did he not know that you were this sneaky?

"You're cruel," He pouted. You kissed his lips as an apology. Dick grabbed your hips and kept you hovering above him. He deepened your kiss, needing your touch to calm his heart - and excite it in a new way that he was far more comfortable with. Then, he spoke between kisses, "awful. Mean. How do I put up with you?"

"You love me."

"That I do."

[catboymingi]

papa, où t’es?

navi/masterlist

pairing: mingi x reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 4.2k

warnings: language, emotional neglect

a/n: europeans hear this song and they go crazy. it’s me, i’m europeans

the entire world knows how to makes babies but no one knows how to make daddies, or stay: five times he didn’t and one time he did

stay.

//

the five times he didn’t:

one:

you’d both been so excited during the entire pregnancy, you’d been doing all the preparations together, you were happier than you’d ever been when you’d found out that you were pregnant, even though it hadn’t been planned. you weren’t ready yet, maybe, but you worked to be as ready as you could during those seven months you had after you’d found out, and you were convinced mingi was going to be the world’s best father, because he’d acted like it when you both were waiting for your little mini-me to be born.

but then the day of labour came, and you were screaming and crying and clinging to his hand because it hurt so fucking much, and though he’d watched videos of people giving birth to prepare himself the real thing was different, but he stayed with you anyway. he didn’t like it, the moment wasn’t among his happiest yet because it felt overwhelming and scary and you were crying so much because it hurt and you seemed so in pain and he had never been good at seeing you be in pain, never. still, he did it, he stayed and he held your hand and he got over himself and you couldn’t have been happier to have him there, and you were exhausted and just wanted him and your little daughter in your arms as soon as you were cleaned up and she was cleaned up, you wanted your little family all together.

but you didn’t get that. he left you as soon as the nurses had placed her little body on your chest, unable to look at the scene in front of him, entirely overwhelmed, and it hurt. it took away from the joy of the situation, because the one you’d wanted to share it with the most had left you, had walked out instead of taking a genuine look at his firstborn, at his child, at the little mini-him. he wasn’t even there when you told the doctors her name.

//

two:

mingi had tried his best to be there for you the following weeks, you and your daughter, he really did try to be the father and the husband you deserved. it was hard, of course it was, having a child was hard when you hadn’t been prepared, when you’d been forced to prepare for it suddenly, but it was worth it, to you it was worth the puked-on clothes, the smell of poop lingering, the crying and the sleepless nights. it was all worth it, because you had a family with him, you had a family with the man you loved, with the man you’d promised to love until your last breath, until death do us part, with the man and the child you loved more than anything else in this world. you’d chosen these people as your family, and they made you happy.

they had made you happy. a few weeks after her birth, a few weeks after you’d brought her home, when she was still screaming every single night and made it so hard to sleep, you had tried to wake mingi, to wake your love, so he could sing for her, something she loved - she loved her daddy’s voice more than she loved yours, and mingi had always sung for her when you’d asked him to or when he’d felt like she might appreciate it. but this night he didn’t wake up when you tried to make him, when she was crying and you were telling him to please help you, he just kept sleeping and you were worried until you saw those things in his ears. the ear plugs that you didn’t even know he had. and maybe if he’d asked you the night before you wouldn’t have minded, because this was hard, this was exhausting and he deserved the sleep, but he hadn’t asked. he hadn’t even told you. he’d just put the ear plugs in the night before without you noticing, and then he’d slept the entire night, leaving you to deal with your crying daughter and with the heartbreak by yourself.

//

three:

things didn’t get better from there on. as much as you hoped they would, as much as you liked to pretend they would, they never did, he never changed his behaviour. he continued to leave when you needed him the most.

but the most scarring experience up to that point was maybe your birthday, when you’d wanted to celebrate with him and your now seven months old daughter, when you’d wanted to celebrate this special day as a family, because that was what you were even if it didn’t always feel like it.

it was your birthday, yet you’d been the one to plan it all, set it all up, you’d been the one to organise a small party for the three of you, with a cake you’d baked while you had to watch your daughter by yourself, sparkling juice and toys for her to play so you could maybe have a few moments of silence with your love. it was your birthday, and you wanted to spend it with your family more than you wanted anything else.

he came back from work, exhausted, kissing you quickly as he made his way into the kitchen, and by the expression on his face when he saw the festive set-up you could tell he had forgotten. and you shouldn’t be angry at him, shouldn’t be as angry as you were, but you couldn’t help it. you couldn’t help feeling hurt and betrayed, feeling neglected because these past seven months he’d continuously left you alone, he’d continuously made you feel like he didn’t care about the family that wasn’t just yours but also his, about the family that he’d been so excited about before he actually got it. you didn’t know why it was, but he didn’t act like he loved you anymore. and now he’d forgotten your birthday, your literal birthday, and he just looked at you with that guilty expression while tears were starting to build up in your eyes, and then he went to the bedroom and closed the door behind him. he’d left you again, and both the kitchen and your heart felt emptier than ever.

//

four:

by your daughter’s first birthday five months later you’d given up on getting him to be there for you. you felt like a single mother, in all honesty, with the only difference that there was someone bringing home the money and someone in bed next to you, though that someone barely ever touched you anymore, not after you’d rejected him when he’d tried a few days after that horrible birthday. you were living next to each other, no longer with each other, and it broke your heart on the daily.

and then it was her birthday and you understood that he couldn’t stay home from work, that was okay, that wasn’t why you were upset. you were upset because he had the same expression on his face that you knew all too well when he came home, an overwhelmed expression, an expression that had you know right there that he wouldn’t stay the entire day. and if he couldn’t, you didn’t want him there at all.

your daughter’s grandparents were there, and when you asked them to take care of her for a moment while you talked to mingi they did, because they too had noticed that your relationship wasn’t how it should be, that he wasn’t acting the way he should, and in their opinion you should have left him months ago. but you didn’t want to, one year after he first left you you still hoped that he’d get over himself, that he’d change his behaviour and be if not a husband for you then a father for your daughter. but his expression told you that he wouldn’t be, not today, at least. so you talked to him.

“mingi”, you started when the door closed behind you, leaving both of you outside on the grass of your lawn that he’d tended to better than your relationship, “don’t go in.”

“why not?”, seeming genuinely surprised that you didn’t want him to ruin his daughter’s first birthday.

“if you can’t promise you’ll still be there to tuck her into bed tonight, don’t go in. let me tell her daddy needed to work today and that he’ll come with a big gift when she’s in bed, let me tell her that daddy wishes he could be there but sadly he has to earn the money to buy her a big gift. let me lie to her so that you won’t break her heart, mingi. because by now she’s old enough to notice that daddy is never there, that it’s just her and mommy, and that daddy doesn’t seem to want his family anymore.”

you were crying now, the hurt from the past year making its way out through tears streaming from your eyes that he wished he could wipe away, that he’d have wiped away if he hadn’t been so overwhelmed again, if he hadn’t felt like you didn’t even want him to try anymore.

“if you can’t be there when we go to bed tonight, don’t go in at all. don’t break her heart the way you’re breaking mine”, and because he was too scared to hurt you he left you, again, left you to cry on the porch as you watched him go until you were calm enough to continue pretending this was normal and he wasn’t entirely neglecting his family, his wife and his daughter.

//

five:

things still didn’t feel the same, not since you’d told him to leave on her birthday. it was obvious that he wouldn’t be there, and it had been more than a year now, more than a year of you having to do everything by yourself, of you being a single parent in every way except for financially. you’d taken to sleeping on the couch the past few nights, hoping your daughter wouldn’t notice your crying because you hid in the shower as you did so, closing the door to her room and hiding from your life the way mingi continued to do on the daily. there were barely any good days, barely any days where he deserved the title of a father, and your daughter was blabbering but barely talked about her daddy, because her daddy was never there.

you’d come to a conclusion, a conclusion that hurt your heart, but one that had to be reached sooner or later. you were going to kick mingi out, you were going to end this relationship, because while it had been so perfect in the beginning it hadn’t been the same since the birth of your gem, and if he couldn’t be a father when you’d made the decision to keep her together then he couldn’t be the husband you wanted.

so, today you weren’t crying your eyes out in the shower, you were crying your eyes out in the bedroom as you packed his bags.

“love, what are you doing?”, he asked you, completely overwhelmed with the situation, a state he’d found himself in way too often but that he’d never cared to do anything about, as it seemed to you, that he’d never known what to do about, as he knew it was.

“what does it look like? i’m packing your bags. you’re moving out.”

“don’t do this”, he begged, but this time it was you who was deaf to his pleading.

“if you want to keep the house, give me the time to find something new for my child and me.”

you didn’t even care to say “our child” anymore, because it hadn’t felt like she was his child right from the beginning, when he’d left you alone with her.

“you stay here, just- please, don’t make me leave. you’re my everything.”

you laughed at that, a bitter scoffing sound, because it certainly didn’t feel like you were anything at all for him other than a burden he had to return to every night.

“you’ve had enough time to show that, and you didn’t. don’t ask me to sleep in the same bed with you again when you haven’t even told me you love me in months. when you haven’t told your daughter that she means anything to you in months. i can’t do this to her, mingi, even if i wanted you to stay. i can’t have her deal with the fact that her daddy lives here but never cares enough to spend his time with her. it’s better if you’re not here at all. you have to understand that”, and you meant it. maybe you could deal with the pain of him not being there, but your daughter was noticing that her daddy was never around, and it was easier to explain his complete absence than it was to explain why he couldn’t seem to stand spending time with her for more than ten minutes.

“i’m sorry”, though he couldn’t argue with what you’d said. he hadn’t been acting right, he knew that, he just didn’t know what to do about it. and now he’d fucked up, he’d lost his family, the most important people in his life. he’d lost everything that he’d ever wanted, everything he’d promised himself he’d protect with his life. now it was him your hearts needed to be protected from.

“if you manage to get your shit together, you can come back. but don’t contact us until then. and if you don’t want to pay either, i’ll have to see you in court, but tell me now so i know to ask people for support until it’s settled. and now leave.”

“i’ll pay”, he promised, “and if you ever need more, tell me. i’ll give you all i can. if you get your own account, let me know and i’ll transfer it there. i won’t let you miss anything.”

this much you believed him, because he wasn’t a bad person, he was just a bad father. but at least you knew he wouldn’t let you starve, and you knew you wouldn’t have to fight him in court just to not end up on the streets. for this you were grateful, if not for much more.

“just leave, mingi”, you told him again, done with packing his bags, and he did, head hanging low, leaving the only people he’d ever really loved like this behind because he couldn’t be what they needed and what they deserved.

//

the one time he did:

you hadn’t expected to hear from mingi again. you honestly hadn’t. he hadn’t contacted you in roughly three months now, much like you’d asked of him, and you’d started building a life for yourself. your daughter went to kindergarten now, though maybe it was a little early since she was only one and a half years old, but you didn’t want to forever be financially dependent on mingi, so you’d started looking for a job yourself while you waited for the confirmation of a kindergarten spot. it had worked out, and now you were working part-time, earning enough to tell mingi that you didn’t need as much anymore, though his payments hadn’t decreased in amount. he didn’t want you to have to miss out on anything else, it was already bad enough that you had to miss out on a husband and a father for your daughter.

today, it was your anniversary, the second anniversary of your wedding, the second year of your marriage was starting in exactly thirty-three minutes, and you’d taken the day off to cry your eyes out as you looked at your dress because you still remembered how happy you’d felt when you’d said yes to him, and now everything was so bad, everything hurt so much and you were alone with your daughter and without the man you still loved so much, the man part of you still hoped would appear any moment to just make it all up to you.

and as if he’d heard your thoughts the doorbell rang, even though mingi still had a key. it was because of this that you tried to wipe the tears as well as you could, not expecting it to be him; not expecting him to remember your anniversary, if you were entirely honest. so you opened the door, and there he stood, wearing a suit that wasn’t his wedding suit - that one was still in your closet - but surprisingly similar, an unidentifiable expression on his face, flowers in one hand and a small bag in the other, a bag that clinked suspiciously as he moved, and the little toy store logo gave away that he’d bought toys for your daughter.

“i’m sorry”, he started, giving you the flowers and then fiddling with the handle of the plastic bag.

“come in”, because you didn’t want to leave him standing outside with a suit, looking so very out of place, and because part of you wanted to hear what he had to say.

“thank you”, taking his shoes off as soon as he was inside, and then handing you the little bag of toys, too.

“i don’t know what you’ve bought since i left, but i remember she didn’t have those yet when i last saw her.”

you were surprised by this - it had been three months, yet he remembered what toys your daughter owned? you hadn’t expected him to know she even owned any at all, except maybe because they made her shut up sometimes, something he seemed to love more than spending time with her.

“what do you want?”, voice hoarse from crying, and he knew what he wanted. he wanted to hold you and make it right.

“i want to apologise. i want to stay. i want to tell you that i’m really trying now, that i started therapy and that i realised that i just made things worse by always running away, when i just wanted to make them better. i was scared i wouldn’t be good enough, i was scared i’d end up hurting either of you, and i didn’t realise that nothing i could’ve done would’ve hurt as much as avoiding you. i want to tell you that i get why you kicked me out, and that i get it if you kick me out again, but that i’m doing all i can to be a good father and a good husband and that i just want to make you happy again. i don’t want you to be sad, not because of me, not if i can help it.”

it was a lot to take in at once, and you focused on the biggest thing he’d told you just now.

“you started therapy? when?”

“as soon as you kicked me out i looked for a therapist. that was kind of what i needed, i think. to realise that i’m not doing anything right the way i’m doing things, and that i need help. that i can’t keep running from my family just because i’m overwhelmed and scared i’m not good enough. so now i’m in therapy, roughly a month of weekly meetings.”

you nodded, taking in the new information. you hadn’t realised that had been how he’d felt, that he was scared of not being good enough. that he’d cared too much, in a way. you’d assumed he hadn’t cared enough to try harder.

“you never told me about this. that you felt this way, i never knew.”

“i know, and i’m sorry about that, too, and about not showing you how much i love you.”

love, not loved, you noticed, and it made your heart skip a beat.

“i just felt like i had to be strong, i shouldn’t be having these doubts because you were handling it all so well and things were so much harder on you. i wasn’t even there half of the time because of work, so why is it so much harder for me than for you? i felt like i was failing, and like you’d think so too if i told you. and then you didn’t want me to touch you anymore, so i felt like you didn’t want me anymore. and at that point it became impossible to talk about anything. i’m sorry.”

“i did want you to touch me”, you corrected him, “just not only in the dark of our room late at night when you’d just fuck me and leave me alone again the next morning. i wanted to be held, i wanted to feel loved, not just desired. i wanted to feel like how i feel means something to you, but to me it felt like it was your way of pretending nothing was wrong. so i didn’t want that, but i would’ve given everything for a kiss, or a hug, or for you to hold my hand, or-”

now you were crying, much like you’d been minutes before he’d arrived, and now that you’d told him you’d wished he’d held you he felt like maybe he could make up for even a bit of the pain he’d caused if he held you now, if he showed you that he wouldn’t leave you alone with your pain this time.

“i’m so sorry”, he whispered against you, and again, “i’m so sorry.”

“just make it okay again”, you begged him, because that was what you wanted more than anything else. you wanted your little family to be a family again, mommy, daddy and the little gem. you’d do anything if only you could get that again.

“i’ll make it okay if you let me. promise, i won’t leave you again if you don’t want me to.”

“don’t ever leave again”, sobbing against his suit but he didn’t mind, he just wanted to be with you more than anything else. wanted to be with his family just as much as his family wanted him there.

“i won’t, not if i don’t have to”, holding you tightly as he tried to fight his own tears, but it was impossible when you were shaking in his arms because you were so scared he was going to break his promise. he couldn’t help crying.

“i love you”, he told you, sobs shaking his big body as much as your smaller one, “i love you and i never stopped, i love you and i’m sorry, i love you.”

“kiss me”, begging again, looking up at him with your tear-filled eyes, scared he wasn’t going to do it. scared it had all been empty words.

but he did, placed his lips on yours in a salty but soft kiss, holding you like his life depended on it. and in a way, it did. in a way, you were his life, you and his daughter, his little family. you were his everything.

and in that moment the clock hit 11:11, the time for wishes, the time you’d chosen to get married because marrying each other was your wishes come true, and now, with him there, your wishes were coming true again, and the silly little alarm he still had on his phone from your first anniversary, a much less loving one, was ringing, showing you that he’d never given up on you even after so many months.

and then you broke the kiss, just a few seconds after, both to turn off the alarm and because you had to laugh, but it was okay. it was how it was supposed to be.

“where’s the gem?”, he asked when you’d both stopped laughing, and you told him she was in kindergarten, something he could technically have guessed himself because you’d kept him up to date with her kindergarten and your job developments, but in this moment his brain didn’t exactly work well.

“can we pick her up together?”, the very first time he’d asked to do something together with the two of you, at least after those first weeks where he’d still been trying.

“please”, and you left hand in hand, as it was supposed to be.

and everything was how it was supposed to be when your daughter spotted mingi waiting for her at the door, ignoring you in favour of the man she hadn’t seen in ages because he’d had to work far, far away, the excuse you’d made up because you couldn’t have told her that you’d kicked daddy out because he didn’t care enough.

“daddy!”, screaming happily as she ran into his arms with her short little stubby legs, and he picked her up the way you’d longed for him to hold her for months.

“daddy is back home”, he told her, kissing her little face and making her giggle. you could tell he was hesitant, he was scared to pick her up, but he did it anyway, looking at you to see if he was doing it right or if you needed to correct the way he was holding her or anything. but you didn’t.

“and daddy is going to stay, right? no work far, far away?”, you asked your husband, trying to mask the fear in your voice and your expression with an expectant tone, but he could tell. of course he could tell.

“daddy is going to stay”, he promised, like he’d promised you so many times before, even though he’d never been able to keep it.

this time, though, he stayed.

[kaito-is-baby]

Um, can I have the sdr2 boys (if it's not too much) with an s/o that thinks they may be cheating, but they're actually trying to propose? Like they're busy all the time. Hopefully this isn't too much for you, I know you do dr1 a lot. You're one of my favorite imagine writers!

Awww Thank you so so much!!! I do DR1 a lot but I also love my DR2 and DRV3 babies so don't be afraid to request them. Okay, let's go to the imagine

I made Kazuichi, Fiyuhiko and Komaeda so so long so the rest are a little bit simple but I still find them cute, sorry for that

SDR2 BOYS PROPOSING TO THEIR S/O WHO THINKS THEY ARE CHEATING

Hajime Hinata

•He's been really distant lately

•Sneaking out whenever someone calls him

•Making up excuses to not assist to your dates...

•You don't want to think about it but you do

•It really seems like he is cheating

•And you are very sad now

•He tries to convince you to go with him to the beach

•On a date!

•You don't really want to go but you accept and try to talk to him about it

•"Hajime... is there something you are hiding me?"

•"What? No, not at all"

•You choose to trust him and forget about the issue

•Even if you are a little tense

•When nights falls you want to make him a little surprise and go tot he sand to write I love you on it

•And as you walk backwards you crash against something

•You turn around and it's your boyfriend

•In one knee and showing you a ring

•Oh, and you really though he was cheating on you

•He would never! He loves you enough to ask you to spend all your life with him!

•He gives you a long speech about all you two have been through

•And you can't really focus on it because you are too excited

•"S/O I love you, truly and forever, will you marry me?"

•You don't give him any answer, you just jump onto his arms and no words are needed

Nagito Komaeda

•He tried, he really tried so hard to make it cute

•But you know how his luck works

•The first thing he tried was to buy your favourite book and hide a ring on it

•As a reference for that love for books you two shared

•He took you out to a very fancy restaurant

•And you two had a great night

•And then he wanted to give you a gift, the book

•You opened it and no special reaction was given

•Of course you liked it but it wasn’t the reaction he expected

•Well, of course, you didn't know he was proposing

•Because there was no ring at all, it was lost

•He understood it pretty fast and tried another thing

•He tried to propose at the lake after a romantic day on there you two alone

•But a fish ate the ring

•And he tried to propose with fireworks

•But he ended up a little burned

• You started to doubt him, you knew he was hiding you something and all of those weird dates didn’t help, you liked him beiing extra romantic but he had been busy all week and at the end of every single date he looked quite... dissapointed?

• You know Komaeda would never cheat on you, he adores you 

• But it looked like he was cheating definetly

•Luckily, before you went absolutely mad or he killed himself trying to propose, he gave up

•"Look, S/O, I've been trying, really but it looks like my luck isn't on our side for this" he gave you his usual tender smile that smile that made you feel calm whenever you saw it "I love you and all of the bad luck from this world is worth it if it means I can spend my life with you forever, I know it is selfish to want someone as great and hopeful as you all for me and even more if there is no ring-"

• Oh, god, he wasn’t cheating, he was trying to propose all along!

•You cut him with a passionate kiss before he starts degrading himself

•"I want to marry you, Komaeda, I want to marry you because you are the greatest person I've ever met and I don't care about your luck, the ring or whatever you think of yourself, I want to spend my life with you"

•And after a long long kiss Komaeda finally says something

•"Yeah, I am definetely the lucky student, that's how I managed to find someone like you"

Kazuichi Souda

• Kazuichi had been working on his repair shop all week

• And you hadn’t seen him a lot in the past month

• But what made you more anxious was the fact that he hadn’t told you about waat he was working in

• He would usually spend hours talking about his inventions

• And you adored to listen to him because he loked too happy while doing it

• But this time he was keeping it a secret

• And you were a little bothered

• You didn’t want to admit it because Kazuichi was the most caring and attent guy you had ever met

• And he loved you deeply

• But he was also easily distrated by other people

• You knew he would never cheat on you

• But sometimes you were specially sensitive about it if he had been delusioning too much lately

• And that along with the lack of communication issue made you paranoid

• But then Kazuichi called you and planned a date for the next day

• You had to go to his repair shop and so he would bring you somewhere

• You went to his repair shop the next day 

• And the wall was projecting something

• He was trying to fix a projector all this time?

• You see then what is being projected

• It shows all of your relationship

• How you two met, how he felt in love with you, your first dates, your first problems, the moment when you two started to be really in love with each other, the tragedy, the killing game... absolutely everything

• And when you were on the verge of tears the projector started to sho things that hadn’t happened 

• Yet

• Like you dressing for your edding, a big family house,, picures of you to on it

• Cookig, cuddling, playing videogames, talking about his machines... all with matching rings in both your hands

• Some kids maybe?

• And it ends with two elders you on that house, spending all your life together

• And when you turn around and finaly see him he is in one knee giving you a ring

• And you were thinking you had lost him... you had been such an idiot

• He doesn’t really propose because he just can’t talk

• And you can't either, being honest

• You finaly manage to spit out a “yes” between all of your tears

• And then he is hugging you

• With sucb strentgh yuo breath, he is just way too nervious

• Your poor boy is shaking and his heart razes at lighting speed

• And once he calms down he whispers lots of “thank you”s to your ear

• I mean, he is so thankful for having you on his life... expect a lot of spoiling for the next few weeks

Gundham Tanaka

• Let’s be honest you have always been a little jealous of Sonia

• They were always so... close

• And he had been spending his time in her bedroom more than usual

• Canceling your dates to go see her

• To the point when you started to think that his Devas were sleeping in Sonia’s bedroom

• And you were paranoid

• And that was too much

• You were about to lose it when the Devas came to your room

• Carrying a little box with them

• You took it in your hands and opened it 

• To find a beautiful, pure black ring 

• It was a rather scary ring, you could almost see hell inside it

• But that was your boyfriend style and you loved it!

• You knew what this meant

• He wasn’t cheating with Sonia, she was helping him and the Devas prepare all of this

• “S/O my dear” It was your boyfriend behind you “there is no one as powerful and valuable as you in this world, and having you by my side has made my power increase" He took your hand in his "would you be the spouse of Tanaka the forbidden?”

• “Yes, yes, yes, of course I will!”

• He kissed your hand before putting the ring in your finger

• “I swear I will make you the happiest person alive, my queen/king of darkness” 

Fuyuhiko Kuuzuryu

•He asks Peko for help

•And after all your little talks Fuyuhiko knows what he is going to do

•Peko isn't either but she is your friend and can ask you something discreetly to find put what would make you happy

•He isn't the best with this things

•On the next summer festival, during the fireworks he will ask you to marry him

•You said you used to love the fireworks as a child and that Fuyuhiko was always handsome on his yukata

•He was fully prepared to make your week amazing and romantic and end it with the fireworks and the proposition

•Well, you said more things but those were the most important for him

•And you weren't suspecting a thing thanks to Peko

•But then things went wrong

•The Kuzuryuu clan enemies attacked

•And he didn't want you to know

•And a lot of yakuza's business had place during the festival

•And he couldn't attend it with you

•He was mysterious, angrier than usual and failed you on the festival

•And you realized then that Peko had been covering him all this time but he had been very distant

•And then those thoughts about him cheating appeared

•Nah, he would never cheat

•He was too sweet to do it, right?

•RIGHT?

•Peko accompanied you all night long

•It was to keep you save but you thought it was to make you forget about your boyfriend abandoning you on your favourite festival

•When the fireworks ended and you arrived at home all that you wanted to do was cry on your bed

•But then Fuyuhiko was there

•With a little box of fireworks on his hands

•"I'm late, I know, but those fucking morons- I... It took me longer than I thought to fix some problems but I'm here"

•"Problems? What kind of problems?"

•"Yakuza's problems"

•"You should have told me"

•"I didn't want to ruin your night and... I brought fireworks"

•You would like to be angry but you imagined Fuyuhiko with all of his bad temper and anger issues searching for a place to buy fireworks just to cheer you up and you couldn't help but to smile and thanks the world for sending you this wholesome boy

•You went to kiss your boyfriend and watched his special fireworks together when he pulled out a little box of pants

•He was not only worrying about not worrying you and making you enjoy the festival, he was also trying to propose to you

•He was definitely the best boyfriend you could have asked for

•And now he was going to be your husband!!!

Nekomaru Nidai

•He was untraceable all the time

•You offered him to do something and he was too busy

•He wasn't even going to the gym

•Something was wrong here

•And you suspected the worse

•Some days passed by and he kept being ilocalizable and you kept overthinking it all

•Until he asked you to go on a walk with him

•A mountain walk of course because it is Nidai, remember?

•And when you were about to ask him if he didn't love you anymore he disappeared

•And the next thing you saw was a plane on the sky writting with its fume

•It said 'S/O will you marry me'

•And behind you your boyfriend arrived in paracaidas

•With a ring in a box in his hands

•Man, he'd put as many passion onto this as he did usually

•And he almost make you lose your head!

•You run to him and hugged him

•And he spinned you around in his arms

•"I will take that as a yes" he said with his characteristically loud laugh

•That laugh that you loved so much

•And now you would hear it FOREVER!!!

Teruteru Hanamura

•He takes you out to the best restaurant on town

•Your house

•With him as the cook your dinner room will be the best restaurant you had ever been to

•He tries to decorate it as romantic as possible

•But being him it looks more like an acenary from an... adult movie

•You called him and no responses

•But still when you arrive home you love it!

•He has been so distant lately

•And with his constant comments to the people around you it was easy for you to think he would cheat on you

•But no, he was planning this surprise right?

•Yeah, sure it was that

•Your boyfriend's dishes were spectacular

•But your favourite plate was the dessert without any doubt

•And no, Teruteru wasn't the dessert even if he joked about it

•It was a beautiful pink an white cake

•And inside of it a ring

•"S/O, I had never met somebody like you, in you I found another family and I want to be with you forever, will you marry me?"

•"Of course yes babe!!" Is the only thing you say before kissing him

Byakuya Twogami (ultimate imposter)

•They didn't really know how to propose to you

•They had never had nobody that loved them for who they were

•They never had nobody who knew them at all

•Except you

•And they wanted to spend the rest of their life with you

•But how? They dressed up as joyero to ask the costumers about their ideas

•But then you saw them and another person (who were just they digused) and started to think he was cheating on you

•You know where dies he gets all inspiration from

•You eventhough it so much that you decided to ask them once they were at home

•"Oh, S/O, baby" they laughed "I wanted to make it special but it will only make it worse" he se puso sober una rodilla and you already knew what he was doing

•And you were so so happy

•"Yeees!" You answered before they could even ask the question

•You just jump over them tirandola al suelo and hugging then

•You were so so very happy and so were them

[kyouxa]

Diabolik lovers Chaos Lineage: Kino (Story 07)

In terms of the gameplay: The black choices lead up to a bad ending, the white choices lead up to a good ending. Please no reposting onto other sites, ask me before translating this into another language too!

Monologue

A few days have passed since I witnessed the clandestine meeting between Shu-san and Ruki-kun.

Ever since then, the atmosphere inside the Scarlet mansion turned even more awkward.

But as I walked down the corridor with Kino-kun today, in order to get rid of the awkward feeling, I heard a loud voice coming from the living room.

When I hurryingly opened the door to the living room, I saw Yuma-kun’s threatening attitude while Shu-san simply turned away from facing him.

Place: Scarlet mansion — Living room

Yui: What on earth is going on here!?

….. !

Yuma: Reiji told us not to say anything to you in order to prevent things from escalating. But I can’t keep on tolerating this anymore!

Tell me, aren’t you hiding something from us!?

Shu: I’ve got nothing particular to hide.

*Yuma grabs Shu*

Yuma: Huh!? You have nothing to hide, huh!? Do you even understand what you’re doing right now!?

Shu: ...Let me go.

*Yuma backs off*

Yuma: Ah, yeah. Guess I’ll have to make things clear if you continue to keep up that attitude.

We clearly saw how you disappeared and then secretly met up with that bastard Ruki back then!

Shu: …..

Yui: Yuma-kun… !

(Ever since that happened, I also wanted Shu-san to explain his suspicious behavior. But on the other side, I also felt as if I shouldn’t bother him with it)

(I knew that if I tried to get in contact with him about this topic, everything would slowly start to collapse…)

Yuma: Give us an honest confession already!

Shu: Haa… how annoying. You’d have to tell me about something too then though.

I’m talking about the fact that you’ve gone out to meet up with that chap Azusa behind our backs as well.

Yuma: ...Hah?

Yui: Eh…

(...How did Shu-san know about Yuma-kun and Azusa-kun meeting up and talking with each other?)

(Up until now, I simply thought this was just another one of Kino-kun’s made-up stories…)

Kino: ...Fufu…

Yui: (No way… !)

Yuma: Who said that I met up with Azusa? At least I know nothing about this shit! So don’t you dare spouting bullshit like that!

*Yuma hits Shu*

Shu: Ngh…

Yuma: C’mon, let’s handle this! If you seriously have the nerve to say shit like that, come at me and fight!

Shu: Fine with me… Nn!

*they start fighting*

Yui: S-Stop…

(Both of them started fist fighting each other… I have to stop them immediately!)

Kino-kun, let’s stop them together—

Kino: Hahahaha! How amusing!

Yui: ...Eh!?

Kino: Even though they were so close to each other, this is how it ended after all? Laughable.

Yui: A-Are you seriously laughing about this!? We have to stop them, now!

Kino: Heh? Why would I try to stop them when it just started to get all funny and interesting?

Yui: Ngh… this is interesting to you… ?

(Kino-kun’s eyes… I can clearly see he’s enjoying this. He’s literally enjoying this from the bottom of his heart)

(H-Honestly… seeing his smiling face in this sort of situation... it’s scary…)

Yuma: Asshole… I’m so done with you, bastard… !

*they continue to fight*

Shu: ...Nn…

Kino: They really started to fight each other, almost like real idiots.

Yui: K… Kino… kun… ?

Reiji: What exactly are you doing, both of you!?

Yui: (Ngh, Reiji-san!)

(Now that he’s here… they’ll obviously have to stop with their fight)

Reiji: Did you truly think I would not hear you speaking this boisterous… ? Explain what this fuss is about.

Shu: ...It was just an ordinary argument.

Yuma: Bullshit. This only happened because you had the nerve to— !

Reiji: Yuma, did you confront Shu about the matter which happened a week ago? Did I not forbid you to speak about this mischief?

Yuma: Ngh… but! Are you seriously just gonna stand by and do nothing about him!?

Reiji: …I did believe in this simply being a matter of time,

But now that this matter has taken place, it will certainly be impossible to ignore it.

Shu. As you heard, we are aware of the clandestine meeting you had with Ruki the other day.

You clearly had a clandestine meeting with the enemy side. Could you please explain the motive you had for what you have done?

Shu: Hah… do you think I’m a spy among the family or something? Don’t be stupid.

Reiji: If you continue to hesitate answering my question, even if it is against your will, I will send you to the dungeon.

Yui: That’s... !

Yuma: Hey! You’ve got a reason for doing that, right? Right!? Say something, we’re siblings after all!

Shu: ...There’s no need to tell you.

If I already look suspicious to you, why don’t you doubt me on your own accord too?

*Shu leaves*

Yuma: Hey, wait!

Yui: Shu-san…

Yuma: Fuck… what’s up with him? I don’t get him at all…

Why does he say nothing about all of this!?

Is there really something that he can’t tell us about… ?

Yui: (There suddenly started to spread small cracks between everyone, after just a small tap like that)

(I didn’t want any of this to happen in the first place. Then why did it come this far?)

Kino: Seems as if Shu wants to be alone for now. Fufu, pathetic, isn’t it? Don’t you think so too, Eve?

Yui: Kino… kun…

(There’s no way — but, yet…)

Place: Scarlet mansion — Kino’s bedroom

Yui: (Everyone returned to their rooms by now… and I had no choice but to come along)

(I’m now once again being oppressed by Kino-kun)

Kino: Hey, you. Is there something you wanna say to me?

Yui: ...Nn

(There’s no point in hiding it anyway. Let’s be daring and ask Kino-kun about it if he already wants us to)

Choices

1) Ask about Shu-san’s statement (white)♡♡♡

2) Why did you laugh earlier? (black)

— Ask about Shu-san’s statement♡

Yui: The story you told us about Yuma-kun and Azusa-kun having a secret meeting...

That wasn’t just another one of your beloved made-up stories, was it? Only Kou-kun and I were aware of this after all.

No, it may have been reported from him to the whole Violet mansion, but I don’t think it would’ve leaked out to other places this quick.

If that’s it, then how did Shu-san know… ?

Kino: Well, what do you think?

Yui: To be honest… I don’t want to doubt you, Kino-kun...

...But, were you the one telling him about this?

— Why did you laugh earlier?

Yui: Why did you laugh earlier? While we witnessed the situation escalate, you looked as if you enjoyed yourself.

Kino: Because it was interesting. Both of them started to doubt each other in an instant. Ahh, everyone would’ve laughed at that.

Yui: Such… are those really your true feelings, Kino-kun?

Was all of this until now just for you to enjoy yourself while being able to see everyone’s trust break!?

end Choices

Kino: Hmph… Hahahaha!

Yui: ….. !? Kino-kun… ?

Kino: You seriously just noticed that? Well, now that you’ve noticed it yourself, it’s too late to hide it now anyway.

Now that you’re this far already, I might as well tell you about it.

On the other day, I was the responsible one for Shu and Ruki to meet up.

Yui: Eh!?

Kino: I wrote a letter to Shu, while I pretended it to be from Ruki. And then, both of them encountered each other in the forest.

As I expected, I influenced Shu with it. The fact that Yuma and Azusa did have a secret meeting, all of those details… they were written down in that letter.

Yui: That means… Shu-san was lured into the forest by the fake letter you created… and you did all of that just for the sake of Yuma-kun doubting him?

There’s no way Ruki-kun would head into the forest for that—

Kino: Exactly, and that’s why I called him in the same way. That’s also why both of them ended up meeting by ’coincidence’ in the forest.

Even if they wanted to exchange information with each other, don’t you think it would’ve ended in a mismatched conversation?

Yui: That’s...

Kino: Reiji also got way too careless about his important-looking these days.

Because of the distrust he now bears on his shoulders, it’s easier for me to manipulate him too!

Yui: Such… why are you doing this sort of heartless thing to them!?

Kino: Because I want to enjoy myself. Being able to see my fellow siblings destroying the families trust, it’s the best.

Yui: Ngh...

(So these are Kino-kun’s true feelings… and even though I’ve been together with him all around, it didn’t concern me)

(He only tried to get in contact with various people, to exacerbate distrust between and within each family, only for his own advantage…)

(He… he never even thought of trying to help me—)

Kino: You’re white as a sheet, y’know? If you put on a face like this, you make me wanna do even crueler things to you.

I might as well inform you about something then. I’ll be the next successor to receive Karlheinz’s power.

Yui: Karlheinz-sama’s… ?

Kino: Yeah. The throne will belong to me.

Therefore I’ll obviously take advantage of the opportunity to have all those hindrancing Sakamaki’s kill each other… just like fellow siblings, right?

Yui: Kill each other… ? Is this your true goal?

From the very beginning, your intentions were to have everyone go against one another and then have them kill each other!?

Kino: That’s right. I’ve been aiming for this goal for way too many years already. And for some unknown reason I was then brought to this place where I can finally finish my doing...

—So this is a great opportunity for me, don’t you think?

Yui: I kept believing in you all this time… I kept believing in you being my only cooperative worker in this situation...

Kino: Hahahaha! You’re really beyond naive, aren’t you?

Yui: (He’s laughing… he must really enjoy himself. His evil doings really ended up scattering the whole atmosphere)

(What I’m seeing right now, that’s the real Kino-kun. He only plays with everyone like toys, for the sake of killing the entire Sakamaki family—)

(...And this is supposed to be the one I choose as my cooperative worker… ?)

I-I won’t let you do this… I’ll never let you do this sort of heartless thing to everyone…

Kino: I’m the only one who’s worth inheriting his powers. So don’t do anything unnecessary to get in my way, understood?

Yui: No, I won‘t let you do whatever you want to any longer... !

If I’d just tell everyone about the plan you have, I‘m sure they’d gradually try to cooperate with me!

Kino: Heh... really? Then I’ll make sure to teach you about what’s gonna happen to you if you say anything about this matter to them.

*Kino grabs Yui*

Yui: Kyaaa!? What are you doing... !?

Kino: Because you said these cheeky things, I’ll make you, as my toy, realize the mistakes you’re about to make with that.

Yui: N-No, stop that… !

*Yui struggles*

Yui: (..... ! I can’t move! It’s different from usual… !

(I can’t move a single inch... and I can’t get up from bed anymore either!)

Kino: Until you finally become obedient, I guess I’ll have to keep my company with you all night long then. Ah, don’t worry.

I’ll not torment you immediately, I’ll do it slowly so that you won’t have to faint on me right away.

Yui: Ngh… !

Kino: But first of all, let me hear your voice. You wouldn’t want me to eat too much anyway now, would you? ...Nn… Nn...

Yui: Nn… Agh… !

(His fangs, they’re way too zealous… like this, he’ll create a wound… and on top of that I’m merely paper in his eyes right now…)

Kino: Everytime I trace the wound with my tongue, blood comes out. I should have you memorize this… right… ?

Does the pledge allegiance still weigh on your mind? I won’t let that get in my way either, you know.

Yui: How can you say something like this…

Kino: That’s just how I think. But I’m actually wondering if I should bite down on your clavicle next. That would surely be intensely painful, but you can endure that.  

Ngh! Nn...

Yui: Ah… Ahh… Nn...

(He’s digging his fangs… way too deep into my body…)

Kino: Fufu… your hands are shaking. Does it really hurt that much?

Yui: Ah… Kino-kun… stop… my hands...

Kino: You’re a really bad one. This obviously makes me wanna strike back. C’mon, what were the words of our vow?

Yui: (I won’t say it… for the Sakamakis’… no...)

(For everyone’s sake, I won’t let him do anything cruel to them…)

Kino: It’s still useless. Well, I wonder if this would make things get less boring in the end. It’s not too bad to enjoy myself with your poor-look either.

I’m looking forward to the moment your heart completely breaks. Hey, why don’t you lift each of your fingers to have my fangs pierce them?

Yui: Ngh… s-stop...

Kino: Fufu… you say you hate it, and yet I can clearly smell your blood getting richer. In reality, you want more of it no matter how many times I suck it.

All of your blood… I only want you to give it to me.

My whole power is based on the fine quality your blood bears within it… so don’t share it with anybody else.

*Kino backs off*

Yui: (...Ah, Kino-kun… ?)

Kino: Don’t worry. You as Eve are pretty important. You’re necessary for me to get closer to the throne.

Even if I end up sucking your blood like this, I’ll make sure not to kill you at the end.

Therefore, I’ll continue to treat you as politely as I can. But...

If my plans were to be crushed by your hands, you better be prepared for anything that might happen at that moment.

I’ll torment your hands way more than that, I’ll make sure to do it so death would feel way better than that.

Yui: ...Nn

Monologue

Kino-kun’s eyes drew a happy crescent moon as he enjoyed himself.

But behind those eyes, in his inner part, he wasn’t laughing at all. Yeah, there’s something hidden within there that’s too dark to be seen.

He also pierced through my skin with his fangs many times, over and over again while he threatened me in my ear. Until this moment, the fear, pain and confusion he caused me didn’t leave me.

And yet I don’t want to abandon everyone like this either. But I know that I’m unable to cooperate with Kino-kun again.

Even so, the terror that he gradually carved into my body really ended up breaking my mind and heart completely.

Place: Scarlet mansion — Kino’s bedroom

Yui: Please... I won’t tell anyone, so... forgive me...

Kino: ...Kuku, Hahahahaha!

Monologue

Because I finally obeyed him as if I was his employee, he once again started to happily laugh from the bottom of his heart.

While I listened to him doing so, I quietly let my tears run down while consciousnessly trying to distance myself from him—

[princessdong]

Prologue: Breaking In

Masterlist

You had always loved the thrill of the unknown. The thrill of getting where no one has gone because of fear. Jiu called it the thrill of getting yourself killed.

But nevertheless, Jiu was a good friend above everything, and maybe it was the sole reason why she was accompanying you in this strange tradition of getting into haunted places of Korea. Up until then you had been in at least four hospitals, a restaurant, two amusement parks, three houses and a school, having started with the whole idea when you were sixteen.

This time you were getting into one of the most ancient houses of the Jeju Island. Rumors about that place were diverse, as people said that the house was built by the Joseon dynasty, and one of the sons of the emperor lived there along her wife, and them being murdered in that very same house in the middle of the uprisings. Other people said that it actually belonged to a Park family that lived there on the 18th century, and one of them killed everyone. There was a small rumors about a vampiress being the only one living there for a long time.

You didn't care, a haunted house was a haunted house, and it was enough for you to want to get in.

Jiu didn't want to go in, she wanted to be cozy on her home, watching horror movies, but she was dragged once again to somewhere else. The plan was the same as always, to sleep in the place, or at least stay there. Jiu never slept, not even a single time since she decided to tag along with you. So, while you made sure to carry the gear to break in, and sleep in the house, she carried unhealthy amounts of coffee, and food.

You knew that the house was different from any other you had been before, as the door opened fairly easy, like it was opened from inside. The lights functioned perfectly, and most of them were on, except those in the second floor. The kitchen was in perfect condition, and the fridge was totally fine, except the fact that it had no food.

“Are you sure this is the right place?” Jiu asked, getting inside the kitchen.

“Yeah, I made sure of it... Like three times. Maybe someone got in before? Or, who knows, the ghost” You joked, not minding that for once the place was in good shape.

“What if there's someone living here? Like, in the abandoned place, and that's why it only looks creepy on the outside?” Jiu questioned, and you sat on the counter, already feeling comfortable with the place.

The action seemed to only unsettle your best friend more, as quickly walked to you and grabbed your hands, pulling you to your feet, and quickly walking to the living room, which wasn't too far away from the main door.

“Are you scared, Kim Minji? Who would've thought that this friendly house would scare you more than a place that's falling apart.” You teased, not being able to see her distressed face.

“That's exactly the point, you big idiot! An abandoned house should be falling apart both inside and outside!” She let go of your hands and turned around. “This place has been abandoned for who knows for how long, and it stills looks like any other house on the inside! That's not normal!”

Seeing her at the verge of tears, you decided to do something. After all, the last thing you wanted was to get your best friend becoming a crying, distressed mess.

“I have an idea. You go out, Jeju is a beautiful place, and I'm sure you would like to visit under better circumstances. I'll go searching around for any living or strange creature that could make this place unpleasant” You assured her, looking into her eyes, grabbing both of her hands, caressing them with your thumbs “And when I give you the signal, you decide if you wanna come back or not. Deal?”

She looked at you, obviously thinking about it. As tempting as it was, she couldn't let you be at this place so strange all alone.

“No. I'm staying. But... Could you, you know, at least go upstairs to make sure there's no one here? I don't wanna get sued. Or killed”

You chuckled, and nodded, putting your backpack on the floor.

“I'll do so. Can we sleep on one of the bedrooms if we find that there's no one, and they're okay?” You asked in return.

“First you gotta get up and make sure there's no one.”

With that, you let go of her hands, taking your phone from the backpack, and put it on one of the pockets of you sweatshirt.

“Remember, wait for the signal to go upstairs, or run.”

You walked to the stairs, with long confident steps, and once you got to the stairs, you switched on the lights.

The second floor was just as perfect as it was downstairs, and although it was certainly creepy, you tried to think into a reasonable explanation for it.

There were five doors on each side of the hallway, and you quickly found out that the first one was a bathroom. It was as big as your bedroom, and it was as luxurious as it could be a bathroom from a palace, but other than that, there was nothing strange. The one in front of it was a bedroom. It had far less luxury than it was the bathroom, but it still had something that made you feel like you had to be a countess to be allowed to sleep in there.

You kept opening rooms, finding bedrooms that varied on luxury, and a bathroom that was as imponent as the first one. By now you only had two doors left, as one of them was the one who signaled the end of the corridor, and the other was the last door on the left. You decided to open first the one in the left, only to find yourself greeted by different types of instruments. There were violins, guitars, a flute, and many others. But, apart from that, nothing out of the common.

Quickly closing the door, you decided to go for the last door.

Inside of that door, was a bedroom worth of being occupied by a Queen. You were even sure that any queen would envy that place. It had a chandelier, a bedroom where at least five people could get in, and still there would be room for each of them to sleep freely. A huge closet was also there, and there was another door, which you could only think of as yet another bathroom. But other than the blinding amount of gold and silver in that bedroom, there was nothing out of the ordinary. At least, that's what you thought, until you turned around to get out of the room, finding that the door that you had left opened was now closed.

But you were forgetful, so you wouldn't deny that there was some possibility that you didn't realized that you had closed the door, and it wasn't until you felt a gush of wind and you were pinned with your back against said door, with a pair of dark brown eyes looking deep into your soul that something was off. You wanted to scream, but a hand flew to your mouth, and the grip on your hips only tightened.

“You little pestering human... You broke into my house, and looked into every single room like you had the right to. And you brought another like you into the house.”

Her voice was sweet like honey to your ears, despite it being full of anger, and coming out low, almost as a growl.

“It's an abandoned house! Or I thought it was! I wouldn't come if I would've known that-”

“And now you can't just go out, because that other human would be suspicious” She interrupted you, thinking out loud. “I guess I could use you both as bloodbags... No, I wouldn't, even though it's tempting.”

With that, she let you go, although not moving from her place, and you weren't sure of what to do.

“You must stay the night with the other pestering human, only to make her believe that no one lives here. No one can know about me, you can't tell.” She ordered, and you looked at her, confused.

“Why wouldn't I? There's someone living here, everyone thought that there was a”

“A ghost? A vampire? Well, they're not wrong with that” She interrupted you once again.

You looked at her, furrowing you eyebrows, and then a smile broke into your face. There it was, Jiu had made you a prank, or tried to scare you to get to stop getting into haunted places.

“Ah, yeah, I see. You really got me, that much I'll admit. You could really become an actress.”

The woman in front of you frowned, looking confused.

“Excuse me?”

“You want me to believe that you're a ghost? Or a vampire?” You scoffed “I'm not dumb, vampires don't-”

Before you could finish the sentence, she had you lifted by the throat, looking at you with now red eyes, veins under them, and fangs coming out from under her upper lips. She smiled, and it was when those fangs looked even more scary.

“Does this look real enough for you, darling?” She sneered, and you tried to say anything, but the grip on your throat didn't let you. “Listen up, you're only staying to not raise suspicions, but once the sun goes up, you and the other goes away. You're not allowed to sleep in my room, or any other room that isn't the first one. Is that understood?”

You could only nod, as you couldn't speak, and she let you go. You started breathing properly again, looking at her dead in the eye. You could've staked her, or slapped her, or even scream at her, but you didn't do anything. However, she could see the fury in your eyes, but it didn't stopped her to keep looking at you with her stoic face.

You were to get out, you even opened the door, but you stopped.

“Who are you?” You asked, looking at her once again.

“A vampiress” She answered.

“I asked who are you. Not what.”

“Joy.”

Knowing that you wouldn't get anything else from her, you nodded, and then closed the door.

You walked downstairs, still thinking of your encounter, when you got hit by Jiu, who thought you were someone coming for her. And it was then when you realized that you had completely forgotten about the signal.

“Fuck, Jiu, I'm really sorry, I got too caught up with looking around and forgot it."

“I could've died! You scared me!” She shouted, and it was then that you realized that you shouldn't tell her about Joy.

“Don't worry, there's no one here, it's just another boring place”

[captain-yeet]

It’s A Little Awkward (Demetri Volturi x Fem Vampire!Reader)

Requested by @like-rain-or-confetti

Summary: You met your mate the moment you opened your eyes to your new immortal un-life. He wasn’t what you expected, and with pent up frustration at a life you didn’t ask for exploding you ran from him. Circumstances cause the two of you to reunite unexpectedly.

Word count: 2.1k

Warnings: call me Avatar A A N G S T, baby. And repressed romantic feelings.

Life sucked and then you died, and woke up again. New. Strong. Too strong. Everything grated your senses and all you knew was fear.

Soaked from head to toe from a heavy flow of rain from above, you remember laying in a damp alleyway feeling... blank. It took a moment to even remember your name. The next thing you remembered were teeth in your shoulder. Fear clouded all your senses until someone hovered over you.

A man whose face brought you a sense of comfort unknown to you.

He helped you to your feet and shortly after you left with him. The calmness he brought to you was almost unnerving, with how foreign it was to your new body. You learned his name was Demetri, and when he whisked you away from the scary alleyway to the city of Volterra to his masters you learned another thing; soulmates existed. Or rather, the vampire equivalent of soulmates.

Joy filled your being at the prospect - a life partner! Someone to be there for you always. And Demetri was perfect.

Come your first feeding time, however, the joy turned into horror, and horror led to punishment by your new master’s orders via a piercing stare from a young blonde teen and even more crushing, disappointment from your mate. So what did you do?

Panic, and smash through one of the Volturi castle’s many windows in the dead of night, sprinting through the streets and to the countryside as fast as you could.

You’d been a nomad for six months now, travelling aimlessly around the world, going wherever you wanted. The Eiffel Tower? You climbed it for fun at 3 am once. The Grand Canyon? Been there, saw that, ate a tourist who catcalled you.

Nothing held you back anymore. 

Your new immortal life would be one that didn’t feel fear ever again. If you wanted to explore? You would do so. If you wanted to run away from crazy Italian vampires who liked to mind torture you? You sure as shit did just that.

One thing stayed on your mind though; Demetri.

God, you hated how things left off with him. After Jane’s punishment session was over you stormed up to your shared quarters with Demetri and the row you two had practically shook the castle walls. He couldn’t understand why you were so adverse to feeding the way he did, you couldn’t understand why he would see it as horrible.

 “You’re literally rounding up innocent people to die, Dem,” you had hissed, baring your teeth as you did so, anger fueled by your newborn instincts.

 “People no one would miss,” he snapped back dismissively, rolling his eyes at your reaction. “We do our homework, cara mia.”

 “Oh my god!?” You walked away from him to stare out the window, hands in your hair gripping the roots in frustration. “That does not make it okay? And don’t get me started on the pit where you dispose of the bodes...”

Demetri sighed from behind you. “You’re a vampire now Y/N. Feeling bad for your diet is a habit you can’t afford to have anymore. It’s how you will survive.”

A violent snarl ripped through your throat, startling yourself and him. “It’s not that! I don’t mind the whole hunting humans thing. It’s your coven’s methods that I find completely messed up.”

 “Our coven,” he corrected you.

You stared at each other in silence. After a few minutes went by, Demetri shook his head. 

 “I have to go sort some things now, collect yourself before I return, love.”

That. That response triggered your furious, panicked escape from Volterra. And here you were, standing on some random cliff in the wilderness of the Pacific North-West, regretting ever speaking to him that way.

Granted, you felt justified in your feelings. And he was being insensitive. Regardless, the mate’s pull still held strong and you wondered as you stared off at the rising sun if it felt as strong still for him too.

 “Hey, there you are,” a silky sweet voice called to you from behind.

Turning around, your dark red eyes locked with the golden ones of Rosalie Hale. A newfound friend of yours. 

She waltz forward and took your hand in hers, a comforting grip. “Come now, training is about to begin.”

Training, right. With a huff, you let the blonde lead you through the forest.

You found yourself allied with Rosalie and her coven for a bizarre reason. Apparently, some Romanian vampires had lost the plot and wanted to claim one of their own as their shared mate. A hybrid. And they wanted to make their own with her.

And they had gathered an army to do so.

At first you thought it was a load of steaming horse shit. When you entered the area, Rosalie and the patriarch of her coven, Carlisle, confronted you, asking you who you were. After proving you were just a random passing through they told you of their situation and asked a favour of you; “Come and see why we want to protect this particular coven member. I assure you, once you meet her, you’ll understand.”

You agreed. You followed. And then you saw her.

A pretty young teenager, with red cheeks and soft chocolate brown eyes who barely spoke apart from her strange form of thought projection and excited hand flapping when she goofed off with her family.

She was just a kid. A fucking kid.

And now, here you were, gathered with the Cullens, some smelly shapeshifter folks from a local rez and many strange vampires. You were willing to fight for what you felt was right - and hey, if a couple of creepy Romanians had to die, then so be it.

 Jasper and Carlisle stood before the group with serious expressions.

 “We have some news,” Carlisle began, “and while we know this will no doubt upset you all, we ask that you keep calm.”

 “The Volturi are coming,” Jasper deadpanned.

Your heart, if it could beat still, jumped. Your old coven, your mate, were coming. A question burst to your lips before you could stop it. “How soon?” 

Jasper eyed you with a curious glint in his eye, sensing your emotions. “Within the next couple of hours.”

So soon! You began to feel panic rise in your chest.

A hand clamped itself firmly on your shoulder. You looked and saw Emmett and Rosalie has flitted to your side, expressions of concern on their faces. It surprised you to no end just how kind they were to you even after they found out you were mated to a Volturi guard. From what you’d heard they had every right to not like you, but instead they welcomed you. Accepted you.

 “We know Y/N,” Emmett said softly, “we have your back, no need to worry about your ex.”

 “If he has any brains he’ll come to his senses when he sees you,” Rosalie added, leaning into Emmett’s side. “Or the time apart will have given him much time to think on his actions.”

It pained you to watch the two lovebirds find comfort in each other’s touch. Your mind traveled back to when you and Demetri first began to get to know each other; he was a great comfort to you. Gentle, none of his touches were rough or hurt you. Just the pure, sweet feeling of feeling safe and loved.

The hours droned on for you, and sure enough, your old coven appeared in full force.

The masters led a group of what looked like their best fighters, just from the colours of their cloaks. You vaguely understood the colour-coding of the ranks of guards in the coven. Two black cloaks stood out to you; the tall hulking mass that was Felix on one side of the masters, who caught you in his sight. His eyes widened and he looked to his right, where on the opposite side of the masters was your mate.

Demetri stared at you looking like a bus has slammed into him, lips parting in shock.

 “Welcome!” Carlisle called out to the Volturi.

 “Ah, Carlisle,” came Aro’s smooth reply. He floated to Carlisle and took his hand in his, reading the memories greedily. “What an interesting time for us all. Fighting on the same side!”

 “They harbour traitors in their midst!” Caius snapped, his eyes locked on you with a death glare.

You shrank as everyone’s eyes came onto you. You didn’t know where to look so you simply kept your eyes to the ground.

 “Y/N, what a surprise!” Aro cooed, ignoring his fellow leader’s cry of annoyance at his response. “I’m sure you and Demetri have much to catch up on.”

Lifting your head, your gaze shifted to your mate, whose stare had not let up at all. No, he stared at you with such an intensity that it sent a shiver down your spine.

Luckily for you, the attention on you and Demetri faded as Jasper began going over battle plans against the Romanians. The day went on quickly yet somehow slowly at the same time; sparring training took place and that went smoothly. But Demetri’s presence made the day drone on longer.

You needed to speak with him.

As the sun began to set, a day’s worth of training and going over battle plans done and dusted, you seeked out the cliff Rosalie had found you at earlier. The scenery up there was beautiful and it gave you some peace of mind. 

You sat at the edge with your hand raised, watching your skin glitter and shine luminously as you turned your wrist. You didn’t flinch when the wind whipped your face as someone appeared at your side, standing next to you.

 “It’s a nice view up here,” Demetri said quietly.

You hummed in agreement. “It really is.”

He shifted, and took a seat beside you. You turned your head to look at him. Your love had not ceased to look utterly handsome in the time you’d been apart. A sadness lingered in his eyes, the kind of sadness that had implanted itself into one’s being after a time of great grief. But he gave you a small smile. “I want to apologise to you, Y/N.”

Tilting your head to the side, you shifted your body toward him, showing him you were listening.

 “I was harsh on you. You had just been turned and you weren’t comfortable with how we - how I fed. And I tried to force my beliefs on you, which I should not have. And the thing with Jane -”

Sighing, you squeezed your eyes shut, flinching at the memory.

 “I am so sorry I stood by and let that happen to you.” You felt his hand encase itself around one of yours with the lightest of touches, hesitant. “What happened between us hasn’t changed how I feel about you in the slightest.”

That made you open your eyes. Snapping your head back up with hopeful, wide eyes, you scanned his face for any sign of a lie; there wasn’t any. “It’s been so painful being apart,” you whimpered. “I don’t regret leaving the Volturi at all but shit, I hate how we left things. How I left you, the one person who made me feel safe and secure.”

Raising your hand to his face, you hovered over his cheek, the hunger you had for him growing rapidly. Would he still let you touch him in such a way?

Answering your doubtful thoughts, he brought your hand to his face, holding it there. Turning his head slightly he pressed his lips to your hand. “I miss you. Let us work something out, please. I’ll buy us a house away from the Volturi, I’ll do anything.” A shaky sob made his body shudder and his gaze turned pleading, begging you. “I can’t live without you.”

That was all it took. Your body moved before you could respond with words and you took his face in your hands and kissed him desperately, sealing your fates together. You’d fought against your feelings long enough; the months apart hurt more than anything you’d ever experienced - even rivaling the thirst of blood - and now you needed Demetri more than anything.

He grinned against your lips, laughing breathlessly. “I’ll take that as a good sign?”

Giggling, you pulled back to smile at him. “I have never felt more sure about anything.”

His hand intertwining with your, you nestled into his side and watched the sun set. For the first time in a while, you felt secure again. As long as you had Demetri by your side, you were ready to finally make something of your second life.

[xihaveaplanxx]

The Storm (Pt 2 of 2)

“Dutch, do you want to go to Mcdonalds with us?” Hosea asked his friend. He and Arthur were going to stop by and get a few burgers and fries and a McFlurry since it’s what Reverend Swanson wanted. He was going to come in later as he was busy at the church. Overly so. It was almost time for the annual Christmas play and he and Sebastian Vael were losing their minds trying to get the kids prepared and what not. Rehearsals were almost getting violent apparently. “Dutch?” Hosea poked at him and Dutch just looked at him before shaking his head no and taking his papers into his room, slamming the door. “It’s been a few months. It’s getting scary now. What? Is he just not going to talk anymore ever again?”

“He talks at work, I’m sure.”

“No he doesn’t. He writes everything down and hands it out to everyone. She really messed him up. Jenny’s friend really messed him up, badly.”

“I haven’t even seen Dreama in some time.”

“I think Jenny mentioned she was taken before the mage council.”

“She was taken before the council?”

“Yes. Apparently she did something to that Burger King manager and she is in trouble. It was only a matter of time. I always told Erandur since she was young, to instill values in her. Not give in to all she wanted. To actually tell her no and look at how she is. I mean I adore the girl, I do but she’s not all there. Clearly. I don’t wanna be the one to say it but Anders made it worse. She’s only acting out because she can’t have him, because she can’t have something she wants. A tantrum that could end in deaths if she’s not stopped.”

“You really think it’s so bad, Hosea?”

“Look at Dutch, Arthur. It really is that bad.”

At Erandur’s house/Teldryn’s pov

“Dreama, you can’t stay locked away forever.”

“Sure I can. I have no interest in leaving this room, not ever. You and Dad told Solas about what I did to Cullen as if he fucking matters. Now I have to report to fucking Solas at least once a week and he is measuring my magical reserves to make sure I’m not over using it.  I am so fucking angry. If you just let me fucking be with Anders this wouldn’t happen but no, you guys hate him and in favor of fucking Dutch. I heard you both saying you kind of like him. He’s a nobody! He’s worthless. I hate everything!”

“You know for 30, you are mighty dramatic. Quite the child.” I sighed. “I always told Erandur to be careful with how he raised you and I see his willingness to not accept sometimes you can get off the rails is affecting you even now.  You know Dutch really likes you or likes you. He doesn’t even talk anymore because you hurt him so bad but I know you don’t care. You are too immature to care and far too deep inside of your mind over Anders to care for who you hurt.”

“Fuck off.”

“Child.” I shook my head. “Being this way won’t get Anders out of jail. He’s being watched by strong mages now. They won’t let him out. It must hurt you to know he is going to be locked away forever but if you want to waste your life hanging up on him, you go right ahead and keep hurting people who wanna be there for you. Won’t be long before you push away John or Dorian or even Jenny. You at least should apologize to Dutch for hurting him.”

“He can fuck off.”

“Fine.” I gave up. Trying to reason with her. She was still a child. I didn’t want to blame Erandur but....this was all him. Even when he got Anders rearrested, he still was thinking how to coddle Dreama and tell her it was okay and it wasn’t her fault. Though she was the one who got him broken out of jail, she was the one who bribed Geralt to let him out. She was the one who lied with this man in the first place but no, Erandur coddled her even now. I feel we need to get him in check before coping with her but it just seems everything was too late.  I left from her room door and headed downstairs. Valdimar had finished cleaning up and was watching Maury...again. I never understood why he loved it so much but he was very interested in baby momma drama and trying to figure out why people would much rather broadcast the fact they don't know the father of their baby rather than addressing it privately.  “Valdimar, I see you finished the housework. Thank you. You know even if you are the house steward, we can help you with the cleaning. You are more like a friend living here if anything.”

“It is my job to keep the house protected and clean. I know I don’t have to do much , but I like to. I like to keep things in order so I can feel like I’m doing something other than getting fat and watching MAury.”

“You aren’t remotely fat. Watching Maury though.....”

“This lady tested 20 men and none were the father. How do you let it get that bad?”

“That..wow...”

“Oh looks like number 21 isn’t the father either” He said as we watched a guy break into a dance as this girl ran to the back practically screaming. “Maker. How do you allow that to happen? 21 men...that’s.....”

“You’d think you’d stop coming to the show after five men but allowing yourself to keep coming back...I’d figure it’s just attention.”

“I don’t know if this is the type of attention I’d want.”

“Not many would.” I patted his arm. “Dreama is being a brat.”

“Don’t let Erandur hear that.” Valdimar lowered the volume on the tv “But she is. She’s been nothing but mean even to me. I made her her favorite meal and she tossed the plate at me.”

“She’s an adult. There is no reason for us to stand by this behavior. I have an idea. Erandur won’t like it but it’s for her own good.”

“What is your idea?”

“Well she doesn’t pay for anything ever. She barely works. If she wants to do what she wants, she can do it not here.”

“You can’t toss her out. She is you guy's daughter....”

“I’m doing it because I care. Erandur doesn’t have the fucking balls to stand up to the monster he created so I will. He might hate me for it and he’ll talk shit about me for it but I’m doing it for her own good. He won’t see it at first, hell he might not ever see it but it’s just how it has to be.”

Two hours later

“Are you seriously throwing me out? I’m telling Dad.”

“You don’t do anything but be immature and it’s time you are on your own. You have your job. You’ll be fine. You have fanboys right, ask them to let you live with them.”

“I....you know, you were always my least favorite dad.”

“I wish that hurt me but after being married to Erandur, nothing you say can hurt me. I’m sure you’ll be fine. You want to do what you want, if you aren’t here you can do what you want. Hell go be with Anders if you want to. I don’t care. You won’t be doing it here so go do what you want.”

“Dad will be upset about this.”

“And I’ll deal with him when he comes in but you need to go. There are tons of apartments and I know you can afford one. Even better, I’ve been saving up money from the military, I’ll get you a place. I’ll pay the first month's rent. How’s that?”

“Really?”

“Yes. Maybe it’s harsh to just toss you out on your ass though you deserve it.”

“You know what, no. Keep your money. I’ll be fine on my own. I’ll pack up my shit and get the rest when I find a place. For what it’s worth, if you and dad fight again, I hope he leaves you for good. He deserved better.”

“You’d say that, you are mad.” I shook my head. “You can never hurt me, little girl.” I looked over at her. “Besides, I know you wet the bed til you were about 12. With that kind of information among other  things....nothing a child like you can say will truly ever hurt me.”

Outside Hosea’s house/Dutch’s pov

I didn’t expect to see her. It had been some time since we spoke, since I spoke in general and yet here she was. She had a suitcase and she looked angry. I was a betting man yes and I can bet she got tossed out by Teldryn. Erandur wouldn’t do such a thing but Teldryn he would and frankly I didn’t blame him. I could also bet that she wanted to stay here. Probably hoping the others weren’t here  in hopes I’d just say yes to her.  That’s unfortunate to assume.  She came up the stairs and knocked on the door. I guess I’d break that vow of silence but I knew nothing I said would be what she wanted to hear. I opened the door and she glared at me, already annoyed. I guess I took too long to answer the door. Oh poor thing. Poorly demanding possibly evil things. Hosea got on me for hanging around Micah , should have warned me of her as well. She’s worse than him in ways I can’t even word.

“Hi.”

“Dutch! I’m so glad to see you”

“Oh, are you?”

“Yes! Teldryn tossed me out and I need somewhere to stay and I want to stay here with you and Arthur and Hosea and Reverend Swanson.”

“Well John did move out to live with his boyfriend but....I’m sorry, you can’t stay here.”

“Why?”

“Why?  Did you really ask me why after what you did to me?”

“Oh come on, you can not think I’d actually like you. Please Dutch, I have morals.”

“Oh yes, morals that made you go after Anders. The same morals that say you flirt with Micah because you wanted his knife. He’s a weak, terrible man, course he gave you it but I saw you that day. I did. I never told anyone because I mean who would want to admit they were like that with him but you were. You are just....too old to be like this . I never wanted to say that to someone but you are. You are legit a child in an adult body. Throw fits when you can’t get what you want, manipulate people and for what?”

“You are an asshole, Dutch.”

“Oh you’d know all about being an asshole.” 

“You are legit mad that I don’t like you. For no reason.”

“No, I'm mad that you used me and got what you wanted and discarded me. You knew I loved you but you didn’t care. You never care. You just want to climb on people and dump them off. It’s the fate of anyone but Anders but he’s locked up forever now isn’t he? How unfortunate for you.”

“I hate you, Dutch.”

“I think I might hate you more.” He looked at her. “How about you just don’t bother me anymore. I won’t bother you, you don’t need to bother me. How’s that? We’ll just go on like we've never met.”

“But where will I go? I need somewhere to stay”

“Why is that my issue? You don’t give a fuck about me....I am not required to care about you....not anymore.”