#kuroo fic

[tetskuro]

kuroo has always been a bit of a prankster, pulling harmless jokes on his friends to get a kick out of their reactions. it's his unique way of showing love. what he didn't realize was that you could match his energy.

"happy birthday, tetsu!" you exclaim. "time to make a wish."

inhaling deeply, he blows at the candle in one strong gust. but when he opens his eyes, the flame is still there.

"what. i thought i.." kuroo trails off and tries again unsuccessfully.

you watch in amusement as a look of confusion settles on his features. little does he know you bought a trick candle for his cake, one that would relight itself no matter how hard he tried to blow.

kuroo is no fool, and he catches on quickly after the second attempt when the flame still persists.

"i can't believe you'd betray me like this," he gasps, feigning shock. "a trick candle? really?"

"it's a symbol of my undying love for you," you profess dramatically though you can hardly keep a straight face.

"hmm then why don't you prove it? i think i deserve compensation for the mental distress you've put me through."

he leans in for a kiss only to be met with a generous dollop of frosting planted on his nose.

"i'm gonna remember what you did," kuroo warns jokingly as you're doubled over in a fit of giggles. "you won't be laughing when it's time for your birthday."

"oh come on, someone's gotta give you payback for all the pranks you've pulled."

before you can react, he smears some frosting on your cheek, and you shriek in surprise. sounds of mirth echo through the kitchen as you chase each other around, cake and candle long abandoned. when kuroo finally captures you and you're catching your breath in his arms, he can't imagine a better way to spend his birthday.

a/n: happy birthday kuroo 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

for more works, check out my masterlist

© tetskuro 2024. please do not repost or modify my work.

[nekomanager]

005. 𝙈𝙄𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙈𝙄𝘿𝙉𝙄𝙂𝙃𝙏 • DREAMS

track list • prev - epilogue

What if the sexy stranger in your dreams and your seductive client at work is actually a ravishing demon determined to love you whatever it takes? Can you break through the delusions before it's too late?

incubus!kuroo, f!reader, creampie, deep pnetration, l-bombs, overstimulation, rough sex, pussyeating, fngering, slightedging, masturbation

here it comes! who would've thought. it took me almost a yr 🤧 this fic bears a lot of memories. I love Kuroo and how thos story unfolds. I hope y'all too. I have smth special in store foe my dear readers too! tha k you for your support and for keeping until the end if this story. 🫶❤️

You were lying in your bed staring at the red collar you gave Mr. Midnight, your cat. Your thumb traced the details of it—the golden bell, the fine leather and every memory of him approaching you before you sleep, welcoming you from work and nuzzling against you when the nights felt too cold.

The old lady said that this item you gave Mr. Midnight was Kuroo’s gateway to your dreams and now that he had returned it, he could never go back anymore.

Her words rang all over your head repetitively.

When an incubus falls in love, his entire being will be tied with his person. He will repel other women and will live, starving, craving for the one he truly and only desires.

If that’s so, then why were you the one feeling this way? Why did it feel like you’re the one who lost a huge part of you now that he’s gone?

His cheeky smile appeared before your sight and his laughter echoed in your ear, making you shiver. How you’d wish it was all true, but they were all recollections of the past you used to have.

You closed your eyes, letting the moment of the night you last saw each other play in your head again. His beguiling smile, captivating scent and warm presence—the firmness of his hold on your hand, tenderness in the way he gazed at you and the honesty in his laughter.

On rewind, you recalled the moment you saw the truth in his eyes. His despair when he begged and your fault when you decided to run away. Tears slid down from your eyes. You went back to the party, threw yourself on him in a big hug and took him away from the crowd. It’s the fantasy of what you could’ve done.

Even if your heart broke each time, you’d still choose to relive your memories again and again, because these memories were what was left of him—these memories were the only proof that, for once, your heart knew how to love and what love was.

Days passed by monotonously. You tried to come back to yourself, picking up the pieces while soothing yourself with thought of him whenever you feel alone.

You strolled by your usual spot, the place where you found Mr. Midnight. Orange and yellow hues cast a beautiful highlight at the little nook.

Kuroo sets you free because he knew he hurt you by not telling you the truth early on and that you might’ve thought that he was only using you as someone to feed on.

The freedom Kuroo gave you was the greatest proof that he loves you.

You’re understanding it clearly now.

Unbuckling the red collar around your wrist, you took a last glance at it. A smile finally surfaced your features as you leave the collar at the spot.

Above it all, your heart was clear, you love Kuroo in all his forms.

And even if the collar was your last remembrance of him, you would sacrifice it as your last and most desperate effort to let him know that even with the freedom he gave you, you’d still choose him.

Walking away, you swallowed the tears in thickly, but they still fell and you’re quick to wipe them away.

Now, it’s all up to fate.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

You woke up each day on autopilot. Go to work, get your job done, eat dinner and fall asleep, but there was no night when you didn’t pretend that Kuroo’s right beside you, holding you tight in your sleep as you hoped you’d see him even just in your dreams again.

“Y/N! We’re having a dinner aren’t you going with us?” your officemate asked, which you replied with a polite dismissive bow.

“I’ll just hop in next time, promise.”  You smiled and they went their way, bidding you good bye.

Sighing, you tightened your hold on your bag as you made your way home, relishing your surroundings. The sunset looked pretty again, you noticed. For whatever reason, you paused from walking this time around, took your phone from your bag and snapped a picture of it.

The dusk blazed in pretty purple and pink—a beautiful ending to another day.

You were admiring your photo when someone bumped hard into you. You looked up at his tall stature...

“S-Sorry!” you said.

The man threw daggers at you and kept walking away.

Asshole. You thought.

Sighing, you slipped your phone back into your bag. However, you completely missed, and the gadget accidentally fell on the ground.

You stooped down to pick it up, but someone beat you to it.

“Oh, thank you murmured.”

Returning the phone in your hand...

His hair was still tousled in disarray, but his eyes showed signs of exhaustion somehow. Regardless, he still looked as attractive as you remembered him. It didn't matter at all! You just can’t believe he’s right in front of you now.

“Kuroo?” you murmured in disbelief, blinking twice.

Your heart was happy and though all you wanted was to engulf him in an embrace you were too overwhelmed to move a bit. Your head was still making sure you’re not dreaming, but even if this was just a dream, you’d still take it.

“Tetsurou,” he said with conviction, extending his hand. “It’s Tetsurou. Allow me to introduce myself properly this time.��

A teary smile formed on your face as you took his invitation. “Tetsurou.”

“Yeah…” He grinned a grin of relief. “Part-time mystical being and corporate officer. Full-time, thinking of you and how you’ve been all this time, it’s keeping me up late at night. I’m losing sleep.”

You chuckled at his usual sense of humor. “I can’t stop thinking about you too.”

Tetsurou stepped closer to you, his hand cupping your cheek. “You look tired. Have you been eating right and resting well? Would you wanna eat somewhere? What’s your favorite food? Is it still salmondon? Wait- Am I...Am I goin’ too fast?”

You shook your head. “Dinner sounds good,” you replied with a prim smile and he returned it with a grin.

You walked side by side. Your hands grazed against each other, both hesitating to hold, until he linked his pinky with yours and your fingers began lacing, entangled together.

Reaching your destination, the scent of scrumptious food simmered in the air while the warm light welcomed the both of you at the nearby restaurant. You were both seated by the window with the view of the Tokyo streets.

“Look at those bags. You haven’t stopped sleeping late at night,” he said, resting his chin on his hand.

“W-Well...about what happened. I’m-”

He took hold of your hand from across the table. “Let’s make things right… this time around.”

Despite all the hurt of the past weeks, his words and smile were reassuring enough, that after what happened, you can begin again and stop living in regrets. You now have the chance to do things differently and you’d make the most of it.

The waiter arrived with your order and Tetsurou lovingly shared a part of his meal with you.

“We eat like normal humans do and our stomach gets filled because of it, but the other method replenishes our energy,” he poured you a glass of water. “It’s what makes immortal and gives us supernatural abilities.

You gaped in wonder. “Just how many years have you lived already?”

“Honestly, can’t count.” He took a bite of his food.

“Oh,” you pressed the chopsticks over your lips. “In books...the women who gets preyed by the-”

“You’re not one of them,” he abruptly cut to make things clear with you.

Your eyes blinked fast in puzzlement. “What…do you mean?”

Shade of red spread across his face, which he gulped down and finally faced you with a serious expression. “Because I love you,” he said then his lips stretched into a serene smile. “Union with the female we love is an exchange of energy and I’m sharing a part of myself, my being with you each time I visit you even if it’s just in your dreams.” Taking a pinch of his food, he popped it into his mouth as he continued, “With other women, it’s just us taking away their energy for sustenance nothing else.”

“Then...” you tiptoed, asking. “How do you know that it’s finally the woman you love?”

“We simply find others repulsive. With you, I can’t even let any other woman touch me. My stomach feels like turning upside down.”

You blushed and took a gulp of your water. “Is it true that you mark…your… your…?”

Tetsurou quirked a brow up. “Yeah, it is. Where are you learning this?”

“On the internet and in shows...”

He flashed a mischievous smirk, “Just what kind of shows are you watching, huh?”

Your face turned beet red. “H-Hey! W-What're you-”

Laughing, he held a hand over his stomach. “You’re so easy to read!”

“I-I’m just curious! I just wanna know you more,” you reasoned out. “There’s a lot of things out ther. I don’t know which one’s real.”

“Go on, just ask me,” he encouraged. His foot was rubbing against your keg so casually. There was no hint of seduction in his features just pure out of habit, however the simple action alone was making  you want to scoot over close to him.

“Have you...ever had a mate, Tetsu?”

He swung his glass of water back and forth. “Nope.”

“Oh...” you mouthed, careful with what you’re going to say next. “So it’s always a different girl?”

“Y-Yeah…” He dry gulped, looking away.

You just got a taste of your food, still figuring out how to process everything.

Taking a deep breath, Tetsurou looked at you straight in the eyes. “You know, I never believed in the love union shit until I met you.”

“So does that mean that whomever you love becomes your...”

“Not really,” he said. His eyes conveyed a different coldness like he didn’t want to answer the question. “It’s a contract, Y/N. When we mark someone it’s gonna be a contract and every contract has its terms and conditions.”

“Terms and conditions?”

He just smiled in confirmation, not giving anything anymore. It’s like he was dodging the question.

“Bill out?” he asked and you nodded in agreement.

You walked out of the restaurant with hands in each other’s. It was complete silence as people passed you by. The nighttime now highlighted the city lights. The moon shone in full. It’s beautiful in white, mesmerizing and bright, illuminating the beauty of the dark night.

Tetsurou pulled your linked hands up, showing to you that he’s wearing the red collar as a bracelet instead.

“Oh!” you smiled. “So you found that out, huh?”

“Yeah, I saw you left it the other day.”

You quirked up a brow. “So you were stalking me?”

Flustered, he stumbled over his words. “Wai- It’s uh...”

You giggled and he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Well, an old lady right here said that the collar is the link between me and you in dreams.”

“Well, yeah, it is. Any item that you have given me.” Tetsurou quirked a brow up. “From an old lady, huh?” he questioned until an answer seemed to form in his head.

You nodded.

He squeezed your hand. “Recently, there’s a story that someone like me fell in love with a mortal but she doesn’t love him back.” You looked up to him as he continued, “Instead, a different woman loved him truly but his affections already belonged to someone else. They said that the lady is still around looking after him even after so many years have passed.”

Come to think of it. You were almost like that too several days ago.

You reached the elevator to your apartment and you tightened your hold on his hand, letting him know that you still didn’t want him to go.

The doors opened and you both stepped in. Tetsurou swallowed thickly as the desire of pulling you then pinning you against the wall was coming in too strong. He wanted to take it slow and show you that he’s being true, but he mussed you a lot and he couldn’t another day without you in his arms.

The doors opened and you stepped out. Having reached your unit, you turned to face him.

“Good night,” you said but your voice gave out so much longing.

“Good night,” he said  with a lot of resistance.

Both of your breathings matched. You gulped and got on your tippy toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. He tilted his head just and his lips were touching your jaw. He flattened his palm on the door of your home, your body pressed against the surface. Your gazes locked intensely.

“1117,” you murmured with anticipation.

Tetsurou clenched his jaw to mask his smirk as he keyed in your door’s passkey.

The singsong chime cut through the thick tension and the moment he pushed the door behind you, all of your inhibitions were thrown away.

He grabbed your face and hungrily his mouth devoured yours – no, you both devoured each other - lips crashing, tongues all tied and saliva spilling down your chins. You were both getting a taste of that sensation you missed for a long time. Finally, it’s just so fucking good to have each other in the flesh.

Your shoes scattered all over the floor with the both of you trying to get a grip on your composure. The heavy passion that reverberated through the two of you was too strong and you were swept away. Tetsu’s hands were all over you while you had one of yours cupping his jaw and the others all tangled up around the strands of his hair.

He slipped a hand under your leg, carrying you in bridal style. You were too lost in his mouth on yours that all you could feel was the fire coursing all over your body and the need, want, hunger to give all of yourself to him and take all of him in.

Your body hit the bed and Tetsu hovered over you. His mouth made its way to your neck, hands grabbed a handful of your tits with the other slipped under your skirt.

You dipped your head back, feeling his deft fingers massage the lips of your pussy. Your mind spiraled in pleasure. You never felt it this good. This was far more amazing than in a dream – the stimulation on your now bare breast and the pressure of him rubbing your clit oh so insanely then he added two fingers in. “Mhmn-” you clenched your teeth. He was pumping in and out like crazy. You raised your hips up, feeling the pleasure building in uncontrollable ways that all you could do was moan and whimper. “Aaaah hah...” Shit. It’s there. Fuck- “Ahh!”

Your juices sprayed all over his hand as your body shook wildly. It was dizzying...satisfyingly dizzying. Your head felt light as you laid down there. Tetsu freed you from your skirt, dragging along with it your panties. His palm roamed your leg, running towards your thigh and you shivered still sensitive from your orgasm. He parted your legs open and looked up at you. With a half-lidded gaze directed at you, he swept his tongue in between his lips.

“You look so delicious,” he said right before digging in. His tongue swiped in between your pussy lips, hitting your clit with light flick. He heard you take in a sharp inhale and felt you tremble a little. A smile etched across his lips. That encouraged him even more. He opened your lips further apart as his tongue explored your folds detail by detail in a quickened pace. “Mhmm...y’taste s’good,” he murmured equally getting drunk in your scent and in your taste. He couldn’t get enough of you and he felt his erection so painfully against his pants. You’re so fucking wet he was practically slurping your juices like an addicting alcohol.

Tetsurou knelt, pushing your thighs down close to your sides. His grip on your flesh would definitely leave a mark. He’s so damn engrossed in eating you out that the room was filled with just the sound of his mouth and tongue on your pussy. It was so dirty and sexy at the same time, that it pushed you towards the edge even faster. Again! Again! You’re getting there- You are!

But he pulled back.

You groaned in frustration, and he chuckled a little. His eyes locked yours down as he pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his perfectly carved abs. You began heaving and oozing even more when he unbuckled his belt and free his hardened cock. Your eyes widened with how huge he was. You could feel your pussy felt desperate.

Teasingly, he was fisting his length. His jaw clenched, veins popping up and he was breathing through gritted teeth. His face was red in restraint. You look so fucking inviting with those lust-filled eyes while you ran your tongue over your lips.

“You want me? You want this cock...” he rubbed the tip over your clit, “...inside you?”

You nodded, rolling your hips to increase the pressure.

He pumped harder and you panted watching Tetsurou with his dick in his hand. His mouth hung open and head swayed back. His low grunts and moans were making you helpless in arousal. You want him. All of him.

“I’m close...I’m close...I’m close...” He repetitively breathed out. Jerking his hips forward he plunged right inside you in a deep forceful shove.

“Tetsu!”

“Y/N!”

His cock was deep inside your core, spilling his warm cum inside and you writhe in orgasm. Your body couldn’t stop shaking yet he was relentless. He began thrusting into you. Now his cum and your juices mixed as a lube for him to fuck your harder and all you could do was dig your fingernails against the skin of his back.

It was crazy. It felt you were coming over and over again. Your head was spiraling in the overwhelming pleasure and the endless desire to feel him more! More! More! Your hips started to match the rhythm of his pelvis. It was rough. He was rough. You were rough. Your skins slapped so hard against each other while you felt your juices spattering with each thrust.

“Ohh- Aaah!” you let out, coming again but he’s still damn hard. He flipped you so your back was against his chest. He swiftly tore your blouse off your body-buttons flying everywhere. His had a handful of your breast as he fucked you slowly from behind. His length was grazing along your slick pussy so torturously.

Unclasping your bra, he watched as your tits jiggle with every movement. He groaned. “You’re so fuckin’ sexy y’know that?” With clenched jaw, he cursed, “So fuckin- sexy!”

He took your elbow while his other hand gripped your waist. Your mouth and eyes popped open as he slammed deep and hard.

“Too much! Tis...too much!” You uttered, going out of your mind.

“Tell me to stop! Go on. Tell me to stop!” Tetsu grunted in almost a yell as if he was daring you and pleading you at the same time.

“No! Don’t! Stop!” Your words came out raggedly along with his hurried and wild movements. “Don’t stop!”

“I will never-” he groaned almost beastly. “Not- when you’re so fucking ready like this!”

You firmly closed your eyes allowing him to fully take control of your body. Your voices echoed around the room with shameful moans and whimpers. There’s something so obscene titillating about how your bodies merge in pleasure.

“Ahh aahh- Tetsu!” You screamed as you came again. Your body weakly gave up on the bed and he watched your used up body as he catches up with his breathing.

He let the beast in him take over again. This night was supposed to be to show how pure and unconditional his feelings were for you. Yet looking at you, with his cum spilling in between the lips of your pussy and handprints all over your body, there’s nothing so pure in what’s happening.

You’re so needy, so fucking filthy and it made him hotter…harder.

Your eyes slightly opened, and they went straight to his still erected cock. You gulped. He saw.

You extended your arms, inviting him in. “Tetsu,” you pleaded and he didn’t think twice. He hovered you, lips quick to find home with yours entangled in a sweet and passionate kiss. Your arms were all around each other. Oh, how you both wished this would moment to never end—just the two of you intertwined and nothing else matters.

Skin to skin, his hand was tenderly massaging your soft breast, while his length rubbed against your slick pussy. Your hips began rocking, seeking for more stimulation and you felt him so hot and ready for another round. Oh, it would feel inside you now. You whimpered in despair and Tetsu chuckled.

“Mhm…so impatient,” he teased.

“Such a meanie.” And your hand travelled to cup one of his ass cheek.

He groaned and grin. “So demanding,” he planted a kiss on your forehead before putting the tip in. He gasped, excitedly anticipating his entrance. It didn’t take long, and you felt just how big and long he was with how much he stretched you and reached you so deep.

Tetsurou began thrusting slowly at first and he hastened when he picked up that you’re catching up with him. You matched his pace, your legs locking him to stay in between. With linked fingers, you both tightened your hold on each other.

“Y/N,” he huffed.

“Tetsu,” you moaned.

“Y/N, Y/N!”

“Tetsu!”

He shifted forward, accessing you even deeper with his balls smacking against your ass.

“I’m close…” he groaned.

“Me too, me tooo!” you cried.

 “Y/N-“ he hissed. “I! fuckin’! love- you-”

“Tetsu-“

Your mouth opened wide as you met your release. Your body shivered wildly and overwhelmingly while he poured all of him inside you. You came hard.

Again. Again and again.

Your love never ends with just that. You were both uncontrollable. You were hungry, trying to get your fill of him, making the most just jn case this was just another dream again. He was fucking you raw You rode him, his face, his dick. He tasted you, licked every inch of you, devoured you. You held each other that night like insatiable beasts.

You came over and over again until you were both overcome with the dawn.

Your body laid limply on top of his. Who knew how long have you been resting like that? You just passed out from rounds and rounds of lovemaking that you couldn’t remember how many times you had done it already.

Tetsu flipped you on your back and began and propped himself on his elbow, watching you rest. You met his gaze and he dipped to kiss your temple until you remembered.

“There’s no...” You asked, wondering why there’s no mark appearing on your belly just like what you have read on the internet.

“I didn’t use my spell on you. I didn’t mark you,” he replied. “The entire night...it’s just you and me. No forces in between.”

“Oh…” you let out and he noticed that questions flooded your head.

“If you want a mark, I can mark you right now,” he said as he sat up to fetch a marker on your bedside table.

You chuckled. “Tetsu!”

“Here it comes!” he proudly announced. The felt tip touched your bare stomach and you wriggled due to the ticklish feeling. “Hold it…hold it.”

“What are you doing?” You took a look at his creation. “What have you done?” What’s supposed to be a winged-heart symbol turned out to be a silly doodle.

Glancing up at you, he traced his finger over his joke of a drawing. “Marking you as my mate is a contract in exchange of your soul and sanity,” he explained. “It works like drugs. You’ll lose your mind, wanting nothing but to provide for me. You’ll live like a slave not a human.” He placed a soft kiss on the spot.

You gulped, afraid of the thought yet you were also concerned about him. “But...what happens? What about you?”

Tetsurou chuckled and kissed your jaw then your lips. “It’s alright. It’s good to be mortal...at last,” he said.

His hand caressed your head as he studied your eyes lovingly. His gaze showed how you were the single best thing that ever happened in his existence; heaven or hell, night or day, there’s no difference nor distance that could separate two people who love each other as long as they keep choosing the other no matter what.

You cupped his cheek, looking back at how everything began. Behind your stray cat, the man of in your dreams and your incessant client...It’s his soul, his heart. “I love you,” you said, eyes sparkling in forming tears.

Brushing the side of your face with the back of his hand, Tetsu smiled down at you. “And I’d rather die than live another lifetime without you.”

As my thank you, an epilogue will be released on the 27th of October 🫶

— 😈  

@tetzoro @moonartemisia @chibishae34 @jadeisthirsting 

@swimmingtimetravelwolf-blog @joy-laufeyson @swithberry @londonstylesxx 

@kuroos--little--kitten @backinmyphase @waxhers 

@osamwah @elmtree12 @creepyicee @dragonxbabe 

@pineapplesneedrights @villsophie 

@pi-crust @lyqiche @trinxt @everyonesroiting @yutzz  

@mahitomycutieee @shidouryusm @reallyperson27 @lawlzichat 

@docosahexaenoic-san @rinatoshi @prickles-the-penguin @soulessien 

@supahumbreon @kittendazzle @simpforyoubitch 

@liquidcatt @nabisonyeo94 @dragonxbabe @misachibi 

@docosahexaenoic-san @lyqiche @sushinwasabi @rinatoshi

@supahumbreon @kittendazzle @kittendazzle

© NEKOMANAGER - All rights reserved. No work shall be reproduced, reposted, modified, translated in any form or by any means.

[jadeoru]

a kiss with kuroo tetsurou is pure bliss. he holds your waist with one hand, and cups your cheek with the other; his lips intertwining with yours as if you're the reason his heart beats. his lips dance around yours with such skill, such devotion and adoration that makes you want to study his choreography; makes you wonder what's going through his mind. the answer is you. if passion was a person, it would be him. that much is clear when he holds you the way he does, as if you're the only thing that matters to him in this world. if he could, he would never pull away from you. he wishes that his lungs were fueled by you - that he could kiss you forever, and never run out of oxygen. he likes to catch you off guard; kissing you when you least expect it. whether that be a peck on the cheek, on your forehead or, his personal favorite, on your lips. he will sneak up on you and smother you with his love, regardless of whether you were in public, or the privacy of your bedroom. he loves sneaking up behind you and wrapping his big arms around your waist, hunching over slightly so that he can kiss you on the lips, and then the nose, and the cheek, before chuckling at your caught-off-guard expression. he can never get enough of the surprised little hmph?! that leaves your mouth every time he does so. his smile widens and he thinks you are the cutest thing in the whole world. he would pluck the sun from the sky for you if you wanted him to. he adores you with every fiber of his being, how could he not kiss you all over when you look at him the way you do?; all dazed and flustered; the same blush creeping onto your cheeks that always seems to be present whenever he's around. and if you tried to tell him to stop? he'd get even worse. trapping you in his strong arms and holding you still in his infamous bear-hug so that he can kiss you even more. he is insatiable when it comes to your lips. one kiss is never enough. neither is 2, or 3, or 5. but let's be honest, you're not complaining in the slightest. "c'mon.. you like this!" he teases, a dopey grin spread out on his face. and you hate to admit it, but he's right.

[theglitterypages]

Haikyu Boys Caught With Their Best Friend's Sister (Featuring Kuro Tetsuro)

Kuro knows how wrong this is but he did everything in his power to not fall for his best friend's sister. It's been a month since he started dating you behind your brother's back, he knows that it's disrespectful and he's risking his friendship with Kenma, knowing how much he adores you. But Kuro waited for so long, and fought his feelings it made his chest tighten whenever he'll see you but can only pretend to see you as a younger sister.

He treasures his friendship with Kenma but the way your skin feels warm and hot against his hands makes his brain malfunction, all he could think is how every inch of you must be worshipped, he breatehs into your skin, gently nipping, and marking the parts that his lips could reach as you arch your back and rake your fingers in his scalp. "T-Tetsu…" you chanted his name like a prayer and Kuro felt the last fiber of control he has in him snap just by hearing your sinful voice call out his name.

He met your eyes, his hand still roaming underneath your shirt as you sigh in pleasure. "Use your words, love. Tell me what you want…" he teased, gently nibbling on your ear and you groaned in frustration, earning a laugh from the man on top of you.

"God, I love you so much YN." he whispered leaning down to kiss you on your lips.

He lets you settle on his lap, his hands still under your shirt as you both try to watch the movie. He's kissing your nape, while his eyes was fixed on the television. "Love…" he breathed, calling your attention. "Why?" you asked, turning to face him.

Kuro took his hands out from under your shirt with a sigh before kissing the tip of your nose, "A-Are you ready to tell Kenma?" he asked, his hands finding yours, massaging it gently before kissing the back of it.

You know how conflicted he must feel, he wouldn't have hide this relationship if not for your request to not let your brother know. You were worried about how Kenma would react and you wouldn't want to be part from Kuro.

"Soon, love. I promise…" you whispered, hugging him, letting him bury his face on your neck.

Kuro held you tightly, even if his chest if filled with worry, he let himself find peace as he holds you in his arms.

But that peace was soon cut off when the doorbell rang and you both were snatched away from your little safe paradise.

Kuro looked at you, waiting for your confirmation of who might be the visitor but the moment you jumped out his arms, Kuro knew who's outside.

"Oh shit, that's my brother. Oh my God, Tetsu you need to hide!"

Kuro didn't have any chance to think when you pushed him towards the bathroom and locked it before you went to open the door to greet your brother.

Kuro pressed his ear agains the door, his jaw clenching as he looked down at the tent on his pants. "Fuck shit." he cussed, he knew it, he knew that it wouldn't be long till his luck ran out but still, he couldn't feel any regret because every stolen moment he had with you was the best of his life, if your relationship might cause a problem with his friendship with Kenma, he would take all the blame.

Kenma walked inside your flat with his usual bored expression, "Is this a bad time?" he asked, examining your flustered look and heavy breaths. Your eyes widened and shook your head, "N-No, I-I was just cleaning and kinda forgot you'll drop off some of my things." it wasn't long since you moved out of your parents' home so you still have some of your stuffs left in there and Kenma volunteered to bring your stuffs so you won't have to do it.

You were just so caught up with Kuro's sinful touch that you forgot that he's coming over tonight.

"Okay…" he handed a bag to you. "Mom said not to bring all of your stuffs, she said she'd like your room there to stay that way." he told you, his eyes scanning your flat as if taking in the details. His eyes carefully scanned your furnitures, his head tilting a little as he tried to take a look of the kitchen, before they went back to meet your eyes.

"Your flat looks way better than last time, you decorated well."

You could only nod your head, usually your brother won't stay for so long to say stuffs like this does he miss you or he's just trying to torment you? "Y-Yeah, I just looked at some Pinterest inspo and stuffs…"

"Cool, hey can I use your bathroom real quick?"

You internally panicked and your instinct kicks in, holding onto your brother's sleeve before he could take another step closer towards your bathroom. "I-I haven't cleaned it yet….it's clogged and I-" Kenma looked down on your hand gripping his sleeve, "You don't know how to fix a clogged toilet? How are you gonna live alone? I'll fix it for you." Kenma removed you hands off his sleeve and walked over to the bathroom, opening the door.

Kuro couldn't hear anything no matter how hard he tries to press his ear against the door, even if he hears some noise, it's all muffled and inaudible, his heart hammers against his chest but he chose to stay calm waiting for you to come and open the door, so when he heard the doorknob click, he sighed in relief but his face went pale when he saw his best friend's face when the door opened.

Kenma was stunned, and there was a dead silence between the three of you. But when he was able to came back to his senses, he looked at Kuro from head to toe, and he saw that he's holding his shirt in his right hand and Kenma looked at him with lazy eyes.

"I knew that you've been hiding a boy for a month now but never in my wildest dreams that I imagined it to be Kuro."

That was the only thing that came out Kenma's mind, in fact, those words were blurted out without any careful thought process, it wasjust him simply stating the fact in front of him, his best friend shirtless hiding in your bathroom, looking flustered as he meet his gaze.

Kenma has suspicions that you are dating someone but he never imagined that it would be Kuro, though he wouldn't deny the way his best friends' gaze lingers on you whenever he thinks that he's not looking. A part of Kenma believed that Kuro wouldn't do anything without consulting him.

He doesn't know what to feel, his best friend and his sister, two of the most important people in his lives hiding like criminals, not trusting that he would understand the situation, as if he'll take it out agains them for falling in love.

He felt a pang of pain in his chest when he came up with that realization. But didn't say anything and wiats for you and Kuro to try and talk for yourselves.

Kuro couldn't utter a word, not when he couldn't decipher the tone laced in Kenma's voice.

"L-Let me explain, I was the one who pursued YN,I fell in love first. I'm the one to blame."

You went to Kuro's side to hold his hand, "But I was the one who wanted to keep it a secret…I was scared and…I don't want you to be mad. I-I love him, Ni-chan." you admitted honestly, squeezing Kuro's hand to tell him that you're in this mess together.

Kenma sighed as he looked at the two of you with his cat like eyes, he didn't like the idea of the two of you hiding just because you both thought that he wouldn't understand but Kenma decided that he'd rather keep it to himself because he couldn't recall a moment where he saw your eyes sparkle the way they do as you look at Kuro and as a big brother, he wouldn't want to put an end to you and his best friend's happiness "Whatever. I'm not against any of this but have some decency to at least cover up your hickeys.." he looked at you intensely, the kind that he gives you when he's about to scold you, "You're still my baby sister…" he told you before looking at Kuro with a glare, "And you're still my best friend."

[quirrrky]

—•✦ 𝙎𝙏𝘼𝙉𝘿𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙉𝙀𝙓𝙏 𝙏𝙊 𝙔𝙊𝙐

KUROO, your business partner and bestfriend, had one birthday wish and that's for you to attend a party as his fiancee, his fake fiancee

3k+ f!reader, friends to lovers, fake dating

ꨄ︎ happy birthday to the male lead of my life! wishing you'd finally show up for real now lmao

“So Kuroo, you’re turning thirty this weekend, right?”  

“No, sir, just twenty-nine.” Kuroo gave a stiff and stony grin. Mr. Onitsuka, the CEO of the sportswear company he was trying to get as a sponsor, happened to be a rigid family man.

“Just twenty-nine...” There’s certainly some hint of disappointment with how it sounded from the older man.  

Kuroo gulped and bit the inside of his cheeks. This deal was his most important thus far. We’re dealing with one of Japan’s prestigious brands. He couldn’t let this opportunity pass, especially that he just recently got promoted as the Sports Ambassador for the Japan Volleyball Association. 

“Well, we can feature our players-” 

“You mean athletes.” Mr. Onitsuka corrected. 

Kuroo gulped and almost banged his head against the nearest wall. Of course, athletes! Not players.  

Not a “player” like...him.  

Who would’ve thought that his singleness was not a good credential for the strictly traditional man in front of him? Everyone who’d see the specimen of a man Kuroo was could tell that he had a high market value among the ladies, which screamed one thing. He must be a player! 

“Yes, that’s right. Athletes...”  

“Look, Kuroo, it’s clear that you had everything well-planned out.” Mr. Onitsuka closed the folder. “But I’m sure you can’t do all this by yourself...” 

“I know someone who could cover this partnership.” Kuroo beamed, excitedly. His face lit up like he had the most brilliant plan out of his pocket. “We’ve been together and conquered a lot by now. I would even bet my life to guarantee you that she is the best!” He pronounced, loud and proud. 

“I never heard about her before.” Mr. Onitsuka's expression changed into something a bit lighter. “So when did the both of you start together?” 

At last! He’s passing the test. Kuroo thought. 

“Oh, me and Y/N? We began working on a project about a year ago and we really hit it off so well. Our chemistry’s just...out of this world.” 

Kuroo’s phone rang with the Star Wars’ Imperial March, a ringtone you personally assigned for yourself. Mr. Onitsuka saw your name and said, signaling for Kuroo to answer the phone, “Your girlfriend.” 

In a slight panic, Kuroo almost juggled the phone in his hand. For a short while, he thought that he was now accepted by Mr. Onitsuka, however there seemed to be a misunderstanding. He wanted to clear it up, but he had to answer you first... 

“H-Hello...” Kuroo gulped. “How’s my girl?” He saw a tinge of disappointment on Mr. Onitsuka's face, and he got agitated, mindlessly spouting things off. “How’s my beautiful...” Of course, he couldn’t say girlfriend. “Bride...” Shit! That's too sudden, so he added. “...to-be.” Bride to-be? 

Oh crap. He ran his mouth without thinking. 

You laughed. “Wait...Are you drunk?” 

“Mhm hmmm...so drunk on you, only on you, babe.” Kuroo winked at Mr. Onitsuka, who was obviously enjoying the show he was putting on. 

“What have you gotten yourself again, Tetsu?” You cracked up and followed, “Hey...listen, I already reserved the bar for your birthday party. It’s all good now.” 

“You’re the best! Wait, love. Just hold on a sec, okay? I’m in the middle of a meeting, but I’ll be there in a heartbeat once this is done.” 

You scrunched your face, laughing. “What’s wrong with you? Are you being hit on by an old lady again?” 

Kuroo chuckled, genuinely. Oh...that smartmouth of yours... 

“Let’s talk about it in a few, alright? See you the soonest, sweetheart. Bye bye, love you.” He hung up and sighed apologetically at Mr. Onitsuka. “Sorry about that. My woman needs me.” 

“Then I suggest you go to her right away. You musn’t keep her waiting.” Mr. Onitsuka said, sounding more relieved to have found out that JVA Sports Ambassador Kuroo Tetsurou was a “committed” man. “If that’d be my wife, I’ll be having an earful by now.” The older man oddly broke his rigid exterior and laughed.  

“I’ll take that advice to heart,” Kuroo affirmed. 

“I’ll be sending the documents with my signature within the week.” Mr. Onitsuka extended his hand and Kuroo shook it. “It was nice meeting you, Kuroo. I’ll see you and your fiancee on your birthday party.” 

Kuroo chuckled, nervously. “Can’t wait, sir.” 

Now, he’s left with convincing you to be his future wife even just for a night.  

⋆ ˚ ꩜ ｡ ⋆୨୧˚

As the new sports ambassador for JVA, Kuroo now carries the image of the sport, well, including its athletes. As much as it’s great to recognize that Volleyball athletes were good-looking, values such as commitment must be reflected as well. Kuroo knew that.  

Though he admittedly had a past of dating around and exploring his options, it wasn’t the deal now. Kuroo wanted to commit but...he wanted to be slow and careful... 

Opening up the door to the restaurant, he immediately spotted you browsing on your phone. He didn’t miss the look of the man seated beside you on one of the bar stools. He sighed. Another one of those bastards... 

Approaching you, Kuroo wrapped an arm around your shoulders and planted a kiss on your forehead. “So, how’s the check-up? Is our little peanut okay? I’m sorry I missed it.” He said, making sure that the man heard.  

You subtly rolled your eyes and answered back, “He just kicked inside me now like he wanted to kick you instead.” 

Kuroo acted animatedly amused. “Sounds like his mother. That’s too early.” Taking the other seat beside you, he swiveled your chair so you’re facing him.  

“Last week you put a ring on me and now it’s a baby.” You snickered. “What’s next, Tetsu? Retirement plan?” 

“Come on. I’m just being the best bestfriend there is. Plus, you have saved my ass a million of times too.” 

Indeed, you didn’t know when it started but you and Kuroo played as each other’s fake partner whenever you’re both being hit on by strangers you didn’t like.  

“Yeah, remind me to pose as your lovesick wife next time.” You joked and Kuroo rubbed his chin. 

“Maybe at my birthday party?” He suggested. 

You took a sip of your juice. “Yeah, sure.” 

“No, seriously, though.” He took your hand and held it firmly. “Mr. Onitsuka...” 

“Oh, Family Guy...” 

“Exactly! I...” He’s now starting to take out his greatest weapon, his sad boy pout and unfortunate doe eyes. 

Oh. “How did you mess up this time?” 

His hold on your hand tightened. “I might’ve made it seem like we’re getting married.” 

That explained the cheesy lovey-dovey petnames a while ago. 

You were speechless. Kuroo’s not the one to lie. He’s always the straightforward guy, so... “How the hell did that...” 

“I don’t know. Man, he’s been grilling me with my life plan, my age and all, that I had a slip-up.” 

Well, you’ve done this countless times before, but his birthday party was a different thing. His friends and some colleagues will be there. You looked at your joined hands and then back at his troubled expression. 

“Y/N, just for my birthday, please...” Kuroo pleaded, “Be my lovesick wife even just for that day.” 

⋆ ˚ ꩜ ｡ ⋆୨୧˚ 

Kuroo leaned on his car as he marveled at you so breathtakingly beautiful in a red dress. Playfully, he whistled. “It might be hard for me to think this is all pretend when you’re doing some serious damage on me with that dress.” 

Equally, you admired how handsome he was in that black sweater, and got lost at the sight of him that you almost trip on your wat to his side. Almost.

“Don’t worry. I’ll keep you in check.” Lightheartedly, you set an alarm in your smartwatch. “You got me until midnight, love.” 

The two of you laughed. 

Today’s the big day. Tetsu’s birthday. And yes, the birthday part did get you to agree to his "proposal". 

In no time, you reached the little bar you rented. It was cozy and had a little dancefloor and disco lights that could make the activities later on at night extra special.

You assisted in arranging a party for him, inviting his close friends and some colleagues. No lies, you’re a little nervous. This was different from the strangers you’d been fooling. 

This is it...  

Kuroo pulled you closer to him, grabbing you by the waist. “You got this, sweetheart.” He brought your hand to his lips. You gave him a prim smile and he opened the door for you.  

You were welcomed by familiar faces which put you at ease, while he had a hand at the small of your back. All the worries you had earlier dissipated. Having Kuroo right next to you like this made you feel more confident.  

Though everyone had their eyes on the two of you, everything about this situation felt natural. The electricity that surrounded you...It was so strong. The chemistry you had the first time you met was glowing in front of everyone right now. You could tell that they looked at you and Kuroo like you’re made for each other.  

“Here comes the future Mr. and Mrs. Kuroo,” Kenma welcomed, mischievously knowing fully well what the both of you were up to.

Lev greeted, “Happy Birthday and Congratulations!”  

“What? I thought you two are already married!” Bokuto remarked, which shocked the both of you. “I mean... ever since you two got along, Kuroo talked about nothing but you. I even got a little sad because I thought I wasn’t invited.” 

Kuroo was just pretending not to be affected by all this, but he’s definitely dying on the inside as Bokuto ratted him out. Slowly, you tilted your head to sneak a glance at your “fiance”. 

“W-What?” he asked. 

You giggled and teased, “I didn’t know I’ve been on your mind a lot.”  

Kuroo just simply scoffed. This was totally not how he planned things to work out.  

Mr. and Mrs. Onitsuka finally arrived at the scene. Kuroo squeezed your hand as if you were going to face the biggest challenge of your life.  

“Kuroo,” The old man called as he patted Kuroo’s shoulder, “Happy Birthday, boy!” 

This was shocking. Mr. Onitsuka went from a scary strict dad to a friendly goofy one. It must be the effect of being with you.  

“Thank you, sir. Ma’am,” Kuroo acknowledged Mrs. Onitsuka’s presence, taking her hand and placing a kiss on her knuckles.  

“Hmm...You sure know your way with the ladies.” The older woman complimented.  

“Gives me headache every now and then,” you said, playfully, which made the old couple laugh.  

“You must be Y/N,” Mr. Onitsuka shook your hand. “Now, I know why you got this boy to settle down.” He patted Kuroo’s chest twice. “You’re such a lucky man to have someone like Y/N right here beside you.” 

“See, even you could tell how bad she got me.” Kuroo glanced at you with an unexplainable softness in his gaze. “So damn bad.” 

The way he looked at you, his smile, his eyes, almost stopped your heartbeat. You felt so little...small? Cute? Weak in the knees? Excuse me. You’re probably smiling like a preschooler having a crush right now, but this felt like a fairytale. Someone must stop you. 

“You both looked so good together I wonder how you fell in love with each other.” Mrs. Onitsuka mused.  

Kuroo confidently replied, “It was love at first sight...” 

You choked up a laughter at his statement. Love at first sight? Crazy.... 

He raised a brow at you with a vexed and hurt expression on his face. 

“Hey, now! It sounds like a Hallmark movie. You can’t blame me,” you reasoned out.  

“But it was the truth!” 

Kuroo took a long and deep inhale. His eyes refused to look back at you as he explained, “When we met for the first time to finalize our partnership for the Volleyball video game project, I really thought you’re beautiful, and as lucky as I am, you’re also smart, funny and someone whom I found comfortable to be myself with.” 

Smiling, you recalled that moment. It wasn’t only him who felt that way that day. “Yeah...that’s...” ...what you felt too. You almost forgot this was all just a pact.  

The two couples found your bickering very amusing, which roused their curiosity even more. “Well...let’s go to the proposal. How did our lady’s man right here propose?” 

“I first asked her to marry me during the successful launch of our first project.” Kuroo shared to spark a memory in you, bashfully rubbing the back of his neck. 

“What?” 

“You really can’t remember?” He complained. 

You explained, “I thought you’re just talking about our next projects to come.” 

He gave you a stare of disbelief like you’re the stupidest, silliest girl alive. 

You paused for a moment, trying to grasp what happened in the past when Mr. Onitsuka cut your musing with a laugh. 

“Those were the days...” Mrs. Onitsuka admiringly commented.  

Mr. Onitsuka sighed. “I guess we’ll leave you two alone then.” 

You and Kuroo bowed your heads as gesture, watching the older couple take their seats.  

A sigh of relief escaped the both of you and you looked at each other chuckling.  

“Let’s go?” Kuroo invited, taking your hand to pull you close to him until he had an arm around your waist. 

You nodded your head, giggling. For the rest of the night, you did nothing but that. He was greeted from time to time, but he’d always return his attention to you. He pulled your chair close to him and playfully fed you with spoonfuls that had your mouth full—ridiculously full that you were swatting his arm almost non-stop.  

You didn’t drink anything alcoholic, but it felt like you were tipsy. You didn’t know where this endless happiness was coming from. It’s that free bubbly feeling that just fizzled out inside you. You were always playful and childlike around Kuroo, but there’s something in this moment that was just different. It was like you were set free–free to express whatever it was you wanted to for a long time.  

Kuroo rubbed your belly, “Looks like our little peanut is getting bigger now.” 

You both laughed at his teasing. “It’s ‘cause you’re feeding me a lot, dummy!”  

“What can I say? I’m just simply being a good provider. Making sure that the love of my life is well-fed and happy.” He boasted and you rolled your eyes.  

Kuroo was so close to you, the warmth of his body surrounding you in full as he had you caged all to himself. Your body moved on its own and you laced your arms around him, burying your face in the crook of his neck. All of a sudden, you didn’t want to let go.  

You didn’t know why, but your heart was about to burst at any moment now. He’s right. You’re... “Happy...” You said with a muted voice. “Birthday, Tetsu.” 

Kuroo embraced you back and even tighter, closing his eyes firmly while he was holding you so close like you’re something that could melt away in his arms at any moment. “I’m happy. I’m very very happy right now, Y/N.” 

He parted a bit, cupping your face with both hands. You searched for his eyes, and he probed yours. Your gaze shifted to his lips while his did the same thing, lingering a little on yours. You swallowed.  

What is this? 

Kuroo bit his lip. His eyelids were getting heavy as he was reaching forward. You had your lips parting a bit, just enough so you’re breathing from the space between.  

What’s happening? What’re you anticipating? 

Slowly, your noses touched. 

Just a little bit more... 

But the speaker close to you started blaring, shocking you both from your little moment and made you laugh instead.  

Kuroo stood up and extended a hand, “Care for a dance?” 

You accepted, taking the dance floor with him. He had his hands on the sides of your waist as you both swayed to the music. Your eyes were not leaving each other’s as you both got lost in the moment, cheeks hurting from the smile that won’t just fade away. 

“Screaming, I testify that we'll survive the test of time they can't deny our love.” The lyrics blazed all over and you let yourselves loose, singing the song together. “They can’t divide us. We’ll survive the test of time. I swear that I’ll be right hereeee!” 

You both burst out laughing at each other with how your voices cracked, failing to hit the high note.  

“I don’t know why it feels like I’m drunk right now,” Kuroo pondered fondly.  

“Drunk on me?” You teased, recalling what he said on the phone last time. 

“Most likely,” he smirked and returned, “You know I didn’t have any alcohol.” 

You laughed. “Yes, because that mouth of yours may run some BS again.” 

“Oh...” He scoffed and rebutted, “You speak as if my mouth is only good at talking.” 

Your quirked a brow up. “What else would it ever be good at?” 

You’re really getting him so bad like this, huh.  

The look in his eyes turned dark and he bit his lip. He stopped dancing, pulled you closer and whispered, “A lot of things.” 

His gaze slickly traveled down your lips thirstily taking in how he wanted them so bad. He grazed back to pin your eyes with a serious stare that showed how he’s already at his limit. You gulped, air got stuck in your chest. You were lost at the sight of his handsome face being accentuated by the colorful lights that you failed to ready yourself when he placed a hand behind your head and brought your lips together. Your eyes automatically closed, arms snaked around his body as he had a hand at the small of your back. Your lips danced, gobbling each other passionately, intensely. You’re taking one another’s breath.  

At that moment, only the two of you existed, intoxicated by each other’s taste and fully consumed by the fire inside you that finally came blazing after a long time being kept hidden. 

Miya Atsumu whistled. “Man, this got me frustrated.” 

“Ugh, get a room.” Oikawa chided, bitterly. 

“Just admit you’re jealous nobody wants to kiss you that way,” Iwaizumi rebutted while Kenma had his phone up, streaming the entire show.  

Your smart watch started alarming, cutting off your kiss. You glanced. It’s already 12 o’clock, which brought you back to reality. This...This was all just an agreement. An odd stabbing pain hit your chest. You looked around and the Onitsukas were nowhere to be found. They must’ve gotten home already. Your heart was knocking loudly in your ear, and you just looked at Kuroo painfully confused. 

All these emotions... 

“Excuse me,” you said, and briskly walked outside the hall.  

Your hands were cold and trembling as you placed them over your lips. It’s done now. You couldn’t run away from it anymore. For so long, you’d been telling yourself it was all just friendship even if you knew that all this time, the person you wanted to be next to you was just him.  

With this heavy feeling in your heart, you knew you wouldn’t be able to handle denying anymore. You love Tetsurou more than just a friend. 

“Y/N!” You heard him called out, and you shut your eyes firm.  

You’d just end up broken if you’d keep on pretending. 

Kuroo held your elbow, and you were swept away when he spun you around so you were facing him. He had you in his arms, with his hands clasped at the small of your back. 

“Tetsu...” You placed a hand on his chest, putting up a boundary. “Mr. and Mrs. Onitsuka went home already.” 

“And so?” He answered, noting that you’re not pushing him away. 

“I-It’s already past 12,” you reasoned out with a shaky voice. 

He bumped his head into yours. “We can have it extended, you know?” His tone was almost begging.  

You chewed on your bottom lip. “What do you mean?” Your heart stammered so hard against your ribcage.  

“The love at first sight, the proposal...they’re all real for me, Y/N.” His voice was staggering that you could feel how nervous and scared he was. Scared of losing you and letting this moment slip away. He might not get another chance. “I slipped up that you’re my bride-to-be because that’s what I’ve been wanting to happen all this time.” He ran the tips of his fingers across your cheek. “I love you, Y/N and should’ve shown you how much a lot earlier”  

“Oh, Tetsu...” you smiled at the brink of tears. “You’re such an idiot!” You lightly smacked his shoulder and scolded, “I thought I’m gonna be single forever because of you, dummy!” 

You both laughed, finally feeling the freedom of having things all let out in the open. 

Leaning close to your face, he teased you with his lips lightly grazing against yours as he spoke. “You’re still not answering me...” he muttered under his breath. “It’s past midnight now. Are we extending?” 

You smiled against his lips and asked, “For how long?”  

Kuroo grinned, pressing your noses together. “Indefinitely.” 

And you answered him with a kiss, knowing that you both won’t have anyone standing next to you aside from each other, indefinitely.  

𝑐𝑒𝑙𝑒𝑏𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 w/ my fellow kuroo babes @mayarii-darling @sookisaurus @tetzoro @shidouryusm @kuroosexuall @jotatetsuken @boosyboo9206 💋

© quirrrky 2023 - All rights reserved. No work shall be reproduced, reposted, modified, translated in any form or by any means.

[kairismess]

pocky challenge with him. (part 2)

kuroo tetsuro. — original chocolate pocky.

kuroo loves seeing your flustered face as you tremble and stare up into his eyes, making his smirk grow as you hesitantly take another bite of the pocky stick. he places his finger under your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes, and takes a big, daring bite forward–until the only distance you two have left is a single nibble between you two.

he teases you, chuckling lowly to himself as he cups the underside of your face with his whole palm, bringing you closer to his own face as he bites ahead. after much teasing, he leaves a small kiss on your lips; it was gentle, it was a kind kiss–a kiss that meant he wanted what you two had to be more than a one time thing; that he's more than serious about wanting to be yours.

++ he nibbles the bits of chocolate coating left on your lips ~

satori tendou. — double chocolate pocky.

tendou enjoys making you smile with the goofy faces he makes when he's so close to kissing you. it's like he takes your mind off the fact that he's so close to you, and instead gives you a reason to show him that gorgeous smile he loves seeing every day.

he does get a bit teasing, though; he soon points out that he's a bite away from you, what'll you do about it? of course, he doesn't expect you to do anything–he just wanted to get a reaction out of you, he wouldn't do anything you didn't want to. but what he wasn't expecting was you to bite the last piece, lean over, and kiss his lips.

guess who's smiling now after all that loving?

akaashi keiji. — green tea pocky.

akaashi only agreed to this so you'd stop pestering him, and he never found it annoying, though–he just wasn't sure about you being so close to him. a million thoughts ran through his mind all at once as you kept biting forward, with him being paralyzed to his seat, not daring to take another bite forward.

he may look calm on the surface, but internally, akaashi was freaking out. he didn't know if he was ready to meet your lips halfway, let alone if you'd like the feeling of his. he didn't want anything to change between you two, because even if he won't ever confess to you his true feelings, at least he can be your friend...

...that kissed you without thinking.

[rewh0re]

—JUST THE TWO OF US ; KUROO TETSUROU

-1.5k words, narration heavy, mainly post timeskip present day setting with reminscence of pre timeskip, mentions of marriage, mentions of moving in, domestic ig (?), kuroo is called dickhead twice, just fluff nothing but fluff and comfort, kuroo turns 29.

a/n: it is kuroo's birthday so you can count on me to deliver a kuroo fic :D pls don't ask why this is so domestic, that's all I wanna be with the guy I love him sm. REBLOGS AND INTERACTIONS ARE APPRECIATED!!

kuroo needs just one more gift from you on his birthday, a gift—your answer—that will change his world, for better or for worse.

Kuroo was grateful for a lot of things in life. He was grateful for his job that sustained his life, he was grateful for all his friends who he spent all his years with and who stood by his side no matter what. He was incredibly grateful for volleyball for training him to be a good leader, honing his teamwork skills, making him more social and interactive and most of all, he was grateful to the sport for leading him to you.

Kuroo remembers all those years ago when you both were but two high schoolers. He remembers how you applied for the position of manager in your first year just so that you could be in a club. He was the one who taught you all there was to learn about the sport and you taught him how to deal with Lev when he was being annoying, amongst many other things. He noticed first hand, the change in your eyes as you slowly grew to love the sport. He remembers the days you tended to all of the Nekoma team members, putting them in their place when they needed to be. He remembers you gently squeezing his shoulder just before he gave his final motivational speech in the nationals prior to his match with karasuno. He remembers how after the match he cried with his head on your shoulder and you told him how proud you were of him, of where he was and what he achieved. He remembers the look of gratitude in your eyes as you told him how proud you were of him for making the trash can battle a reality and he remembers that that's the exact moment he realised that he's fallen in love with you.

Then came graduation filled with tears of melancholia, smiles of pride and joy, throwing of caps high and hugging all the people who helped you get through these three years. Classmates taking pictures to store each other in their memories. Juniors crying because who would now give them the motivation they needed? That's when Kuroo asked you out. He slowly pulled you aside as he led you by your hand to the volleyball gym where the both of you spent the last three years strategising against other teams, planning training camps and what not. For the three years you had known him, that was the first time he seemed to be out of his wits. He stumbled and fumbled and rubbed his eyes and sighed before he finally said in one breath, "I like you. It took me some time to realise, but now I do and I like you and I really do hope you like me back-"

Your soft chuckle interrupted his train of thoughts. You could swear he had never been this confused in his whole life. Then you started laughing and he thought that's it. He thought he was about to face rejection and his heart started breaking, piece by piece.

"It took you so long, you absolute dickhead," was all you said when you finally calmed down and Kuroo stood there, more confused if that was even possible.

"I like you too. It's a shame we're not in the same college but I believe in us. We'll make it work, we always do. Right?" You smiled and it was gentle, filled with deep affection and warmth. So contagious was your smile that his lips stretched into one until he too, was grinning.

He took your face in his hands and touched his forehead with yours, closing his eyes as he let your scent fill him in. He felt your hands close on top of his and he confirmed, "we'll make it work."

Fast forward to some eleven years later. Fast forward to now, in the present where he's there with you by his side. You've become a constant in his life now. You were always there, cheering him up and vice versa. Through aggravating college professors to annoying bosses and coworkers who got on his nerves, you calmed him down. You moved in with him some years into dating. Kuroo was so happy when you accepted the apartment key he got you as a birthday gift with a smile, his usual nerves shaking off the moment you kissed him.

That's not to say your relationship was always smooth sailing, no, it definitely wasn't. You had your fair share of fights with one of you sleeping on the sofa or even leaving the apartment because sometimes a break was all you needed. However, you both always found your way back to each other, back in each other's arms with muttered apologies and silent tears. Whenever you had a fight, he felt his world would tear open. It scared him. But you always came back and he was always grateful and he knew he'd never lose you. He couldn't afford to. You knew the same. To lose him was like losing an integral part of yourself. To lose him would mean to drown yourself in the great blue not knowing how to come up to the surface.

Fighting these hardships, always being there for each other no matter what, letting your love for each other reign victorious over every hurdle is what brought you here today. Today, his 29th birthday. A quaint night where it was only the two of you, your shared giggles and the faint glow of the refrigerator light in the darkness of your apartment as the two of you tried to dance. A tune played in the background, just the two of us by Grover Washington Jr and Bill Withers. Both of you were horrible dancers, stepping on each other's feet. The half eaten cake on the table was long forgotten, empty Chinese takeout containers and chopsticks laid bare. None of that mattered to Kuroo, all that mattered was how in love he was and truly, he must have done something amazing in his past life to have been here with you. You'd given him his gift an hour back when the clock struck twelve to be exact. However, Kuroo was allowed to be a selfish man today. He wanted another gift from you, an important gift that would very much make or break him.

Suddenly the weight of the little velvet box inside his sweatpant pockets felt immense. There is a certain time, a right time for everything, he felt proposing now would be perfect.

So you saw him suddenly breaking away from you as he slowly got down on a knee. Confusion. That was the first reaction that took over your face followed by realisation. Then your slow gasp as your shaky hands went to cover your mouth when he took out the velvet box and opened it.

The ring was absolutely beautiful. A splendid diamond with intrinsic designs.

"I don't think there is a day that goes by where I don't thank my fate for leading me to you. I am a lucky man because I can call you mine," he started. There was a tiny crack in his voice which he tried to hide. You were at a loss for words.

"Ever since that day, eleven years ago now, when you said yes to dating me, I have been so grateful. Grateful for so many things, especially for you. I love you y/n, so very much, I can't put it into words. I was never as good with words as you. However, I do want to say that I want to be a little selfish today. You'll let me be a little selfish right? I want another gift from you. I want you to say yes to my next question ok? Will you do me the honour of marrying me?" By the time he finished his speech, tears of happiness strained your cheeks and you were on your knees, hugging him. Hugging him tight.

"It took you so long you absolute dickhead! Yes! Fuck....yes!" You whispered in his ear between sniffles and you felt his body relax in your hold, the muscles loosening as his arms wrapped around your waist. He sighed in relief as he buried his face in your neck.

You remained like that for a while, just silently crying tears of ecstasy in each other's arms. It felt like a long while before he left a slow kiss on your temple and separated from you to slide the ring on your finger. It looked absolutely gorgeous.

Kuroo was lost in his own thoughts, admiring the ring on your finger with a gentle smile until he felt your free hand on his cheek.

He looked up at you, grabbing your neck in a gentle hold and kissing your forehead before touching it to his own.

"We made it work Tetsu, we made us work," you closed your eyes, basking in the warmth that was Kuroo Tetsurou. Basking in the comfort that your now fiancé brought with him.

"Of Course we did," you felt his lips against yours. "We always do."

[veenxys]

「Making out with Haikyuu boys」

⤷ Bokuto

he loves messy kisses where he can show all his love and need for you. runs his hands over you, from your thighs up and down your back. he loves to bite your bottom lip just to see a reaction from you. he likes to control the direction of the kiss, sometimes even taking your hands and putting them around his neck, or just pulling you into his lap.

⤷ Kuroo

he likes to tease you; it starts with soft, sweet kisses and quickly turns into deep, passionate kisses. he likes to pull away just to see you searching his lips, needing him. he likes to put you on his lap so that you are impossibly close; you feel the heat of his body as he kisses you passionately, squeezing and stroking your body as if that’s the last thing he’s going to do. he also likes to bite and suck your bottom lip and smile against you when you gasp against him.

⤷ Atsumu

you held his cheek so gently and leaned in, placing a tender kiss on his lips, looking at him passionately and giving him a sweet smile, and that’s what drove him crazy. he feels his heart racing and butterflies appear in his stomach. he would then pull you back to sit on his lap and he would kiss you again and again and again until you were pulling away breathlessly. smiling at each other, he puts his hand in your hair and caresses the back of your neck with one hand while the other glides down your body before pulling you into a passionate kiss again.

⤷ Osamu

one of his main goals is to get a reaction from you. he knows your every weak spot and every thing you love him to do and he will do anything just to hear you moan or gasp against him. he loves to kiss your neck or jaw, run his hands over your body, pull you against him so you can feel him… he knows how to leave you on cloud nine.

⤷ Oikawa

he likes to get between your legs while giving you a few teasing kisses everywhere but your mouth, just so he can see you ask him for what you both want. he knows your weaknesses and likes to use them against you just to see your reaction and teasingly say “do you like that, love?” “do you want me to do it again?” he manages to stay in charge only for a while because you are his weak point and, when he least expects it, he is completely surrendered and obsessed with you; needing your touch and your taste more than anything.

⤷ Nishinoya

loves it when he can kiss you against a wall, leaning in and pecking your lips sweetly before you wrap your legs around his waist and pull him closer, biting his bottom lip. always pulls back to gently brush some hair from your face with a loving, teasing look in his eyes.

⤷ Kenma

his kisses and caresses start off shy but affectionate; leaving light kisses on your lips, stroking your thigh with his thumb before finally kissing you again with more passion. his lips are soft against yours, sweet in a way that makes you wish this moment would never pass. he takes your cheek in his hand and strokes it gently with his thumb. he likes to leave kisses on your jaw and neck and hide his face in your neck and smile because, like you, he never wants this moment to end.

⤷ Suna

lazy making out with him is a favorite. you could be lying in bed together, watching a movie when he starts spraying kisses all over your cheek/neck. soon the movie is forgotten as all your attention is focused on his lips and the way his hands touch you so needy and loving. your hand is on his cheek while you kiss him deeply but slowly.

⤷ Sakusa

loves to kiss your neck. his lips would run down from your lips to your jaw, then your neck, his tongue peeking out to lick the skin teasingly, sometimes nipping at it. soft whispers of “you are so beautiful” between kisses, little sighs when he leaves hickeys on your skin. he always smiles and buries his face in your neck afterwards, just enjoying the warmth of your body.

⤷ Hinata

his intentions in the beginning were innocent; just a sweet kiss on your lips and a squeeze on your waist as a show of affection. but when he least expects it, he’s on top of you on the couch; you sliding your arms around his neck as you deepen the kiss. him running his hands over your body, leaving light grips and soft caresses as he moves his body against yours, making you gasp against him. his lips moving in a slow, passionate rhythm as he likes to take his time making out.

[missmeinyourbones]

CARVE YOUR NAME INTO MY BEDPOST

cw: AFAB!reader, fingering and oral sex, reader referred to as ‘brave girl’ once, first time hookup vibes when you are nervous and excited and curious and blushing WOOOO, kuroo is service dom king core, slight religious themes if you squint

Kuroo has wanted you for as long as he can remember, since before he even knew what wanting felt like. 

You’d met back in your high school days, and between your quick wits and his know-it-all persona, the dynamic was magnetic. It was always so natural with you, even with his heart beating a mile a minute and his palms sweating against the denim of his jeans. 

The two of you were always a special kind of exception for one another. Friends, always, but with something more buzzing beneath the surface. The constant craving for something out of reach, something thought to be intangible. 

He’s felt it since the very moment he laid eyes on you, but he’d told himself you didn’t—and with that, he left his pride heavy, but intact, in his throat. 

Which is why he can’t believe he’s actually here—with you splayed out across his bed like an angel of temptation in the garden of Eden. Your skin is softer than he ever imagined, your tiny whines more angelic than any prayer he could've hummed in church. 

Your lips are plump and raw from his ruthless assault on them, and he admires the way they curve and whimper around his name. 

He stares at the wet patch dolloped on your panties in awe. Experimental, as if you’re unreal in his palms, he lets his pointed finger gently apply pressure to the soaked spot. When you buck your hips eagerly and mewl at the mere brush of his finger, he grins from ear to ear.

“You always this sensitive?” Kuroo whispers, more so thinking out loud in wonder than meaning to humiliate you. 

The heat from your core rises up to your chest in embarrassment.

“No,” you whimper, hiding your face from his own in the softness his pillow. It smells just like him.  

He hums to himself, before repeating the action with a bit more conviction. Less unsure but still erring on the side of caution, Kuroo presses his finger to your bud. In no hurry at all and wanting to savor the moment, he begins to rub a firm, teasing circle to your clit. 

He wants to drown in the way you gasp against the subtle movement—how you curl your toes against his sheets and wiggle your hips in time with his slow touches. So reactive, he gawks. 

“No one’s taken care of you in a while, huh?”

Again, Kuroo’s words aren't meant to humiliate you. He’s curious, always has been—especially when it comes to you. He can tell from the urgency of your hips and the desperation in your moans that you need this just as much as he does. 

Stubborn as always, you take a deep breath before you shakily respond, “I—I can take care of myself.”

Kuroo laughs at your determination, his brave girl.

He knows you can take care of yourself—in fact, he’d be a bold-faced liar if he said he hadn't imagined it before. Your measly fingers buried in your cunt as deep as they can go. You whining and thrashing to meet their pathetic thrusts. But it’s just not enough. You can’t bend and weave the way he can, can’t reach the spots his fingers do with ease. 

“I know you can,” he coos at your resilience, before removing your panties with a slow drag, “but you deserve to relax, too.”

You shiver at the sudden cold air on your wet heat and Kuroo is salivating at this point. You’re completely spread out for him, in his room atop his bed, waiting for him to touch you—to make you feel good. 

And he plans on it, he has something to prove. 

You feel his hot breath at your center as he places tender kisses around where you want him most. His tongue is hot on your thighs, his lips inching closer and closer to your dripping center. You’re positive he can see you clenching around absolutely nothing.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this,” he practically whimpers once his tongue flickers against your clit. A tiny taste of what he’s waited years to have. 

“How many times I’ve thought about this,” he indulges himself with a hefty lick to your sweet spot.  

Your hands cover your face from the intimacy of the moment. You groan as you tighten your thighs around his head in a flustered embarrassment.

“Stop talking,” he hears you bashfully whine. 

Instantly, his large hands are cupping your thighs, spreading them back open and holding them in place for his access. 

“Hey, relax.”

His stern words contrastingly feel like honey as he reattaches his mouth to your pussy. He allows his slick tongue to prod slightly at the opening of your cunt, once, twice, three times, before returning his attention to your puffy bundle of nerves. He swells in pride at your whimpers and cries, before realizing that he wants them louder.

“So tense all the time,” he hums against your cunt, brushing a slender finger between your dripping folds. “Let me take care of you.” 

Your back arches at the sudden intrusion. His finger just barely dips into your warmth, as if he’s testing the waters—and with the way your hips are bucking against the palm of his hand, he’s soothed to know that you’re enjoying this. 

He forces your hips down with his free hand, all without stopping his gentle assault on your clit and teasing actions to your fluttering hole.

“Don’t want a single thought in that pretty little head of yours,” he encourages your moans, swallowing you whole as his finger fully dips inside of you. Your head falls back in a heavenly moan, and you feel Kuroo smile between your legs.

His finger begins moving at a steady pace, and you eventually grant him permission to slip a second one in when you whimper out a pathetic, “More.” 

As Kuroo’s smooth actions persist over time, you feel the coil in you burning closer and closer to its end. 

The only noises in the room are ones of primal need, crude and devilish. Your hiccups and begs of his name on your tongue. His own silky moans purring against your core. The sloshing sound of his fingers massaging your folds with intent, and the spit from his tongue and your slick as he laps you dry. 

Sensing your peak close on his tongue, he presses a palm to your lower stomach, pinning you down and limiting your ability to run from his touch. He watches you thrash and shake beneath his continuous assault on your cunt, the pleasure becoming too much for you to handle. 

“Just feel me, yeah?” he encourages you, removing his mouth from between your legs and allowing himself the privilege of looking up at you. Your head thrown back, hair sweaty and sticking to your forehead. Your chest heaves with every moan that bubbles from your throat and your skin begs for him to kiss it. 

With a few final thrusts and prods against your spongey spot, you cum around Kuroo’s two fingers. Hard. Harder than you could ever make yourself cum—than anyone could, you know to be true.

But, you don't tell your best friend that. 

Kuroos talks you through your high, allowing his fingers to slow but continue riding your orgasm to its peak sensitivity.

“There it is,” he coos, admiring your weak attempts to claw at his wrist and stop your body from shaking.

When you finally begin to relax and the overstimulation becomes too much to bare, Kuroo removes himself from between your legs. He brings his lips to your own, and you taste yourself on his mouth. Though you're in a haze and borderline delirious, it's hot and heavy and feels a lot like love between teeth and tongue. 

He readjusts himself so he’s by your side, allowing you to collapse on his shoulder and sleepily attempt to catch your breath. At the sudden realization of where you are and what just happened, you barely lift your head to look up at Kuroo. 

Your eyes find his dopey ones boring back at you, awestruck and borderline heart-shaped, before your sight travels down to his length throbbing at his crotch.

“You’re—” you weakly go to point out his hardness before he giddily interrupts you. 

“On cloud nine? Yeah,” he finishes your sentence with pride. 

“I can...” you move again to sit up, wincing at the soreness in your core in an attempt to reach for his cock to stroke. But Kuroo catches your wrist gently in his hand, before ushering your head back onto his shoulder. 

“You’re exhausted,” he reminds you in a soft tone, voice devoid of any hardship or pressure. His fingers dance along your hairline, smoothing over your skin as he places a few delicate kisses to the crown of your head. 

“And if I’ve waited this long to do that,” he breathily jokes into your hair, “then I can wait a little bit longer for my turn.”

[thelittlewriter]

Bad Day

Pairing : Kuroo x Reader

Scenario : You suddenly start to put some distance between you and your boyfriend. Did you simply have a bad day ? Or is it something more ?

The bed was painfully large. He hated that you weren't with him. You had been sleeping in the guest room for almost a week now. Nowhere how hard he tried, he couldn't fix it. There was nothing to fix. Everything had been fine until one day.

"I'm gonna sleep in the guest room tonight," you suddenly said.

His heart skipped a beat when he heard that.

"Did I do something wrong ?"

You shook your head as you said :

"I just need some time alone. I'll be back soon."

You hadn't since then. Nothing really changed between the two of you. You had been spending time together, as usual. And yet, he couldn't help but notice your tone and your eyes. You looked tired. Sad. He wondered what went wrong, why your change seemed to be sudden. It couldn't be. This sort of uneasiness didn't appear in just one day. He had missed the signs. He didn't pay enough attention. And now, he was not what you needed. Worse, you needed to be away from him. It was so bad that you couldn't sleep in the same bed.

He walked to the guest room. The door was closed but the light was still on. He knocked. You didn't answer.

"Y/N ?"

You didn't say anything. He heard your steps going toward the door but he didn't say anything. Maybe you didn't want to talk.

You opened the door. Your eyes met his and you smiled. It didn't reached your ears like usual and your eyes weren't as bright as before.

"Is there something wrong ?" you asked.

You thought you could fool him. You wanted to. You were going to be fine. Not now, but soon. You didn't know exactly when but you wanted him to still be there when you would. That was why you didn't want him to see you sad.

"Tell me what's wrong, Y/N."

His eyes were just like yours. The one you were seeing you were seeing when you looked in the mirror.

Exhausted, worried.

You couldn't keep doing that to him. You took him by the hand and led him to the bed. You took a deep breath. It wasn't easy to admit.

"I don't know what's wrong with me."

He gently caressed your hand, encouraging you to continue.

"You make me happy but I'm sad and I don't know why."

Your vision became blurry and your voice was shaking. You never said that to anybody. It was sometimes like this. Like you were empty.

"I feel empty and I don't know how to fix it."

You sobbed as he took you in his arms.

"I don't want you to think that you did anything wrong. It'll pass, I promise."

He held you tighter. He heard you sniff as you forced yourself to stop crying.

"I'm fine, I just had a bad day."

He felt you shaking in his arms. You looked so fragile, like you were about to break into pieces. You were not fine. You needed help. It wasn't just a bad day.

"It's not true, Y/N, and you know it."

You started to cry again. You could hide it but you couldn't stop it.

"And I'll be here even if you're not fine. Even if it's not just a bad day."

You were holding his shirt so tight that he thought you were going to tear it.

"I don't want you to think that I'm not the person you fell in love with anymore. I wanna stay funny and happy."

His heart ached. He wondered how long you had been keeping your sadness from him. He wondered if he had ever known you happy.

"I love you no matter what and I want you to know that I'll be here even if you're not ok. You don't have to hide this from me."

You stated silent for a moment, your body still shaking. Suddenly, he heard you take a deep breath.

"I'm not ok," he heard you say. "I need help."

You looked up to him, with red and puffy eyes.

"Can you help me ?"

He kissed your forehead and answered :

"Always."

Hey ! I feel like I've been away for a while... I started writing this when I wasn't feeling good (take care of your mental health because once it's here it's never really gone). Anyway, I hope you liked it ! Have a good day !

[nekoramen]

content;

kuroo tetsuro. semi-angst, comedy, semi-fluff. best friends au, unrequited love / yearning (kuroo's pov), post-college au. mentions of bokuto x reader. 2,110 words.

warnings: brief mentions of alcohol + drinking, swearing

might be ooc; i like goofy men and kuroo is goofy

please watch 'how to lose a guy in 10 days' if you haven't already!!

it's assumed that kuroo, reader, and bokuto are all friends

"kuroo. give. it."

kuroo smirks, holding your remote just out of reach with those long, gangly limbs of his. he pushes and play-slaps at you as you try (weakly) to take it back. "dude, we have literally watched 'how to lose a guy in 10 days' for the last ten movie nights in a row now. how are you not tired of it yet."

you roll your eyes. "first of all, it's only been nine times. second," you eye him, "you are not depriving me of my man matthew mcconaughey. not tonight."

this. is. war. to be fair, he started it and you were just taking the necessary measures.

you lunge at him and your fingers find his sides. you dig and tickle him without remorse. he gasps between laughs as he tries to escape you, writhing and retreating until he was cornered and pressed against the couch arm.

"stop, stop, please! okay, okay," he wheezes and goes limp against the arm in defeat. you relent with a cackle. in the few seconds you take to pluck the remote from him though, there's a few things he lingers on:

you, hovering above him with your knees planted on either side of him, body almost pressed against his. you're warm.

that wide, dorky grin of yours. the absurd frenzy in your eyes when you get competitive and a little childish.

the brush of your hand over his. it's tingly.

the flips in his stomach and the tightening of his chest when you've pulled away.

kuroo swats at the thoughts. they keep creeping up from your persistence to watch this god-forsaken movie combined with his love for antics but nope. nope. nope. stop it. head empty please.

he doesn't think further on it anyways (as least not too hard) because 'how to lose a guy in 10 days' is playing (yet again) and to be honest, it's so fucking good. not that he'd ever make you privy to that thought; partially because he doesn't want to admit that he actually likes it after the countless times you'd badgered him to watch it while he refused and hated on it for no good reason. (he gave in on your birthday. no regrets.)

mostly, though, it's because he quite likes the routine. he steals the remote, you fight for it, you... fuck. stop. don't think about it.

"tetsu," you whisper.

"hm?" he snaps his head towards you, eager to escape his brain. you're silent, brows furrowed and poor lip gnawed at ruthlessly. he slowly leans towards you, stone-faced.

a blink, two, and he drawls out in his raspiest voice, "why… so... serious?"

you splutter out a laugh and he grins. it's wonderful, your laugh. it’s wind-chimes on a clear spring day, the crash of a cool summer sea on his skin, sunrays filtering through a cloudy sky. his gaze lingers on you, but you soon turn away back to the screen.

"____. i know your husband is very handsome, but are you okay?" he gently pokes your shoulder. "you seem down. don't wanna talk about it with your bestie?"

you cringe but he pulls another chuckle from you. your bestie, dependable as ever, can always put a smile on your face, you'll give him that. even if he's annoying 99.999999% of the time.

you beckon to your cat charlie from his post and he trots over, his grand fluffiness and all promptly plopping into your lap. you pet him a few, gentle purrs as your reward.

finally, you face kuroo again. "i'm gonna do it," you squeak out.

kuroo hums. "do what?"

"it. that." you nod towards the screen. kuroo blinks back at you.

"i'm... gonna ask him out. bokuto."

you blink at kuroo. he blinks back. matthew (ben) gets up from his stadium seat yet again for a soda.

"you're gonna ask him out... like you said you would the last ten times?"

"charlie." you point to kuroo. "attack."

"meow."

you just had to get the 0.00000001% saint of a cat.

"i really will this time though," you sigh. even you can’t convince yourself of it.

"it's okay to be nervous. you're great and i'm sure he'd be so freaking happy to go out with you." he smiles at you. "you can do this. you got this." he knows you won't do it, but he knows proper bestie behavior.

you stare ahead but he can see you biting back a grin.

"okay," you finally mutter and turn to him, shoulders untensed. "thanks, tetsu. i think i really can do it."

"of course." you both concentrate back on the movie for some time until he leans back over. "i know this is your favorite comfort movie, but did you choose it specifically to try and manifest andie?”

you tense.

"you gonna channel her? all her charm and confidence? oh god… the craziness...? yours isn't fake though. poor bokuto doesn’t know what’s coming," he teases.

you punch his arm but you can’t hide your sheepish smile. "stop perceiving me."

+++++

it's another three fridays until you and kuroo have another movie night. such is the life of a new college grad, working overtime and grabbing drinks with coworkers until your respective projects finally die down a bit and you can both find some time.

"kirin secured!" kuroo calls out as he bustles into your apartment. it’s been too long since he’s been here. since he’s seen you. "i don't know how you like this stuff. beer is fucking disgusting. soju is where it's at."

"first of all, don't yuck my yum. second, fried chicken is literally the best but i still got you your favorite beef skewers without complaining when, frankly, you're wrong and it should be fried chicken tonight."

"you're literally complaining."

you stick your tongue out at him.

kuroo sets out the food on the coffee table in front of the tv as you lay out pillows and blankets for some royally cozy floor seating. once the both of you sink into the sea of softness, you hand him the remote.

his brows surpass his hairline. "you don't wanna choose?" he asks.

you shake your head, grinning wide. "you've put up with me for so many movie nights in a row, i can let you have this one time."

"wow. how generous of you." he snickers. maybe he can finally blow off the dust that had been collecting on his to-watch list.

"so, what’s got you celebrating? did you get a good performance review?" he asks as he endlessly scrolls through the list on his phone.

"mmm..."

he looks up. you still don that big, dorky smile. "what? what is it?"

unable to take it anymore, you abruptly grab his shoulders. "i did it."

he responds with a blank stare.

"oh my god." you roll your eyes. "i did it! i fucking did it, kuroo!" you shake him violently. "i did it!"

"you have to realize i can't read your mind," he says, his head nearly snapping off.

"i asked bokuto out on a date!"

he clasps his hands over yours. you stop shaking him. "...really?" he says slowly, quietly.

"yes!" you exclaim. "and get this—he said yes! like, immediately! he seemed so excited about it too! god, i, i can't even believe i did it, well to be honest i had a couple drinks that day with my team but i called him and he came and i just did it and he said he was literally thinking about asking me out too but he kept chickening out and he was so sweet and helped make plans while he drove me home and he made sure i got inside before leaving and—"

"that's... that's great." he pats your hands.

but all too sudden for his heart, especially after your spiel, he’s tugged into into a crushing hug.

“thank you, tetsu,” you murmur. you pull back a bit and somehow you’re not the least fazed by the closeness of your faces. “i couldn’t have done this without you. for real. your words helped me find the courage, you know?”

kuroo’s heart dissolves in the pit of his stomach, but he still manages a smile. “of course. and i meant every word.”

he turns back to his list, letting his smile fade but you add, “god, i’m so excited for tomorrow.”

he eyes you. “tomorrow… is your date tomorrow?”

you’re practically vibrating in your seat and you happily pull off a cube of meat from your skewer. “yep!” you say between chews.

kuroo forces the corners of his mouth to curve upward again. just a little bit longer. “that’s great!” he cheers and sets down his phone. he picks up the remote and quickly clicks through a well-known path before pressing play.

“how to lose a guy in 10 days?” you say incredulously, wide-eyed and head tilted.

he nods. “yep.” you’re still staring in his peripheral. “i just need it,” he relents with a sigh.

“you… need it?”

he looks pointedly at you for a few seconds before slowly turning back to the screen. “matthew mcconaughey.”

+++++

curse bestie behavior.

he shouldn’t be here. not when you’re getting ready for your date, not when you’re grinning ear to ear thinking about said date, not when he’s nauseated thinking about you grinning ear to ear thinking about said date. no.

your singing floats softly from your bedroom to kuroo in the living room. he sighs, gazing out your window to the neighborhood while cradling charlie. it’s a beautiful sunny day. disgusting.

he holds charlie up facing him. “i can do it. i can do it. right? you believe in me, don’t you, charlie?”

“meow.”

“thank you. i appreciate it.”

there’s a creak of a door behind him, and he turns. you’re stunning. he glances at the floor because he’s sure his heart has leapt out of his chest but no, somehow it’s still stuttering in there. you look so magnificent. and most noticeably, happy.

“good?” you ask, fidgeting with your fingers.

“of course! you look great,” he replies with a tight smile.

“thanks," you reply, beaming and far too giddy to note how quickly the corners of kuroo's mouth droop.

he watches you pace around, gathering your things and alternating between checking your appearance in your camera and your text messages.

"____."

"hm?"

he opens his mouth but you fill his sight with that poor gnawed lip, worry creasing your brows, and your tremor from all the capped anxiety and excitement.

he closes his mouth and walks over to you, passing you charlie and placing his hands firmly on your shoulders.

"don't worry," he says, confident and assured. "you'll be fine. he'll have such a good time with you and i'm sure you will too." he gives your shoulders a light squeeze. "i'm sure of it."

you breathe out a heavy sigh. leaning forward, you lightly tap your forehead on his shoulder. "honestly i think i'm gonna throw up, but that helped a lot. thanks, kuroo. seriously."

you pet charlie, visibly more relaxed from kuroo's words, and he's able to give you his first sincere smile today. he wants to savor this, you and him, you being any bit happier because of him. he soaks up the sight of you for another beat before opening his mouth again.

but a ping of your phone jolts you. you thrust charlie back into kuroo's arms, grabbing your things and quickly glancing at your phone before rushing to the door.

"wish me luck!" you exclaim with a frantic wave of your hand before you disappear from sight.

kuroo deflates and looks down at charlie. round green orbs blink back.

"you're right," kuroo nods. "i'm gonna do it."

he bolts for the door and steps out, eyes locking onto your figure, a bounce in your every step.

"____!"

you halt and glance back. you're beaming from ear to ear, maybe the biggest smile he's ever seen on you. it's blinding. several feet behind you, he sees bokuto leaning against the passenger door of his car. he's grinning as per usual, and seeing kuroo, he gives an enthusiastic wave.

"what's up?" you call back.

kuroo stares at you for a moment, lip between his teeth and chest rising and falling several beats too quickly.

finally, he simply raises charlie above his head, simba-style.

"charlie says 'have fun,'" he musters weakly, accompanied by a small wiggle of your furry companion.

you giggle and wave back at the pair before bouncing over to bokuto.

kuroo hurries back inside, closing the door and leaning back against it. he sinks his face into charlie's unending fluff, releasing a huge sigh.

"fuck," he says, muffled.

"meow."

fuck indeed.

[nekomanager]

004. 𝙈𝙄𝙎𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙈𝙄𝘿𝙉𝙄𝙂𝙃𝙏 • DELUSIONS

track list • prev - next

What if the sexy stranger in your dreams and your seductive client at work is actually a ravishing demon determined to love you whatever it takes? Can you break through the delusions before it's too late?

incubus!kuroo, f!reader, deep pnetration, l-bombs, overstimulation, rough sex

I've been gone for so long up to the point when I thought that I'd be leaving this app and even this fic but here I am. The ending and even this chapter have changed so much from my original outline but I guess my hiatus turned them even better as I drew a lot of my emotions from the time I was away and put 'em all into writing this. Next chapter's the finale as planned, my sweethearts. Enjoy the rollercoaster! mwah mwah 💋

You drew a deep sigh. Finally, the event will be tomorrow, and you’d be wrapping up this project. You’re supposed to be relieved, but you couldn’t help but feel a stab of bitterness. 

You doublechecked all the crossed-out items in your list to see if they’re complete. Everything was all set up. In fact, you already prepared the Press Release ahead of time so it would be easy for you to seed it to the media once the party is over.  

“Good job!” Kuroo said as he went near, standing right behind you. 

You glanced up at him, carefully tracing the outline of his features—the softness of his lips, the perfect sculpt of his nose and the intensity of his eyes. He blinked, slowly, and returned your stare with his gaze softening as each millisecond dropped.  

What’s this longing building inside your chest? Will the end of this project be a goodbye for the both of you? 

Before you could even get deeper, he gave you a small smile. “Thank you for everything. There could be no one else.” 

You closed your fists, biting back your emotions. You shouldn’t be feeling this way.  

Kuroo softly smiled, which put you quite at ease. Slipping his hand in his pocket, he pulled out a small box and opened it.  

“That’s-” Your eyes widened at the sight of a gold necklace with a heart pendant.  

“For everything we spent together,” he said as he carefully laced the jewelry around your neck. He spun you a little and took a good look at you. His gaze was tender and so was the satisfaction on his face when he said, “Perfect.” 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 

Warmth and undeniable comfort surrounded you as your arms were around his strong frame. He laid you down on the bed with a hand cupping the back of your neck.  

You peered deeply into his eyes as he firmly held your gaze, marveling at how lucky he was to have you at this very moment. He placed a kiss on your forehead, your eyelid, nose and paused for a sensuous peck on your lips. Not stopping, he sucked on the skin of your neck until his lips reached the heart pendant, giving it a tender kiss. 

His palm travelled to your breast and revered your supple flesh, bringing your nipple to his mouth, his tongue doing its magic. His other hand skimmed through your bare skin and parted your legs. He immediately found your sweet spot as if he had your body ingrained in his memory. Oh, you’re so ready for him.   

You heaved and wriggled beneath him. His middle finger teasing your clit prompted your hips to grind against his touch, feeling the sensation building and wanting more at the same time.  

“Be patient,” he whispered in your ear, and you felt him smile at your neediness. You couldn’t help but desperately whine a little in response.  

Chuckling lightly, he caressed the top of your head and pinched your cheek. “Oh, how could I resist you.” 

Taking your cue, he inserted two of his fingers in and your anticipating pussy welcomed him in so easily. He began stroking your insides and your back arched in satisfaction. Your mouth was agape and you moaned while he watched closely as your immodest expression kept making his cock harder and harder, wanting its own taste of your sopping cunt.  

You reached out for his cock, but he stopped you by the wrist.  

“I didn’t know you want me that badly,” he teased, smirking before slipping his tongue to play with yours. He sucked you relentlessly, drinking you in. The intensity of his mouth on yours matched the sweet torture of his fingers, increasing the passion as he was already feeling your thighs shaking. 

“Aahh...hah hmmn-” you whimpered. Your head dipping deeper into the pillow as you felt the rush approaching.  

“That’s it, my pretty girl...” he chanted as your hips started buckling.  

You felt the chills running across your skin. You’re getting there. You’re getting there! You’re- “Mhmn!” You let out a pained whine as he pulled out his fingers right when you’re about to cum.  

He teased you further by rubbing the pads of his three fingers over the wet lips of your pussy.  

Fuck! It was painfully making you crave him more. You want him inside you, to fill up with his dick. “Please...”  

“Please, what?” he asked, mischievously. “This one?” You felt his tip against the surface of your needy cunt. You quivered. Automatically, desperately, stupidly, you locked him in, bringing your legs around his torso.  

He responded with a kiss and held you close, feeling your trembling body encaged in his arms. You were so lost in endless want when he began running the length of his hard member against your pussy, glazing his cock with your juices.  

“Haah I – haah I want...” you managed to let out. 

“What do you want?” His gaze probed you, almost hypnotically.  

“I want...y-!” Your eyes almost crossed when he slammed the entirety of his long cock straight into your pussy, making you cum all of a sudden.  

Your body was shaking strong, yet it was just the beginning. He thrust into you through and through that you shed tears of pleasure with the overwhelming sensation. How can you even keep up with him! He’s ramming into you mercilessly like there’s no tomorrow.  

And damn, you sure looked so dirtily beautiful as your tits bounced like crazy everytime he’s hitting you deep and that motivated him to drive you even crazier. He pressed your legs further and closer to both sides of your face, putting you in a mating press. His body weight kept you in place when he took your hands and laced your fingers with his.  

His eyes were pinning you down so intensely, conveying so much lust, passion and affection.  

“Y/N...Y/N...Y/N...” He panted your name with every shove, not letting go of your gaze. His grip on your entwined hands tightened as he quickened his pace and deepened his thrusts. “I love you...I love you. Fuck! I love you.” 

Your heart felt like bursting with so much emotion that your arms flew to wrap around him. He held you tightly and buried his face in the crook of your neck while his hips rocked in a frenzy. His consistent deep and ragged strokes were now about to get you to your peak, but all that mattered in that moment was having each other this close, this uninhibited, this free. 

Shivers ran down your spine and he’s quick to devour your pleasure, sealing your lips with his as he fed your pussy with his cum. You trembled beneath him completely lost in the intensity.  

You both caught on your breaths. And now, your vision was getting cloudy. Propping himself with his elbow, he lovingly caressed your head like how he usually did.  

He gave you a sweet smile, while you tried not to close your eyes and fall asleep, wanting to spend more time with him, but drowsiness was getting the best of you. Before you lose it, however, you heard him whisper, “See you later.” 

Your eyes opened, still heaving from your dream. You woke up in confusion but there’s a part of you that still wanted to remain dreaming.  

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 

It was a big relief that the event was set up perfectly. This was testament to all your hardwork, and you couldn’t wait but have Kuroo see this. You glanced at your phone. The guests were now populating the venue still there was no word from him.  

Passing by a wall mirror, you tried looking your best for tonight, and no, it wasn’t because of him! You blushed, focusing on the heart pendant he gave you, however your attention was taken when a familiar figure arrives.  

Your world stopped when you turned around and saw Kuroo.  

He was approaching with one hand in his pocket and confident strides, donning a black coat and pants with a grey dress shirt underneath. His hair was messily tousled, yet he looked so devilishly attractive. The lights were casting a magical play of red and purple over his ungodly features. His hazel orbs found you and his lips slowly stretched to a sultry smirk. Your throat went dry just by the way he locked eyes with you. You clenched your thighs together and drew in a deep breath. Kuroo was danger and desire converged into one, a man so magnetizing he’s almost a sin.  

Words got stuck in your chest as he came face-to-face with you while you got nothing to say. He leaned close to you and whispered in a low and raspy voice, “You look edible tonight.” 

You blushed. “W-What?” 

He grinned, cheekily. “You’re adorable.” 

“Oh...” You took deep breaths, panicking about what to say. “You...same.” Realizing what you just blurted out, you snapped and pulled yourself together. “I-I mean! You look the same.” 

Kuroo gave out a laugh that came from his belly. He offered you his arm and you were shy to hold onto, which, by the way, was so sturdy and strong you felt so weak and little around him. His scent was equally making you melt. It's smoky, leathery, and musky vetiver it’s intoxicating.  

“You’re wearing the necklace I gave you.”  

“O-of course,” you replied quite nervously. His eyes dragged from your face right to your cleavage where the pendant was completely undressing you with just his stare and all you could do was put a hand over yourself.  

And the bastard chuckled, you knew. You knew him so well.  

The evening went by with you socializing and networking together, but time didn’t pass without his subtle touches like featherly brushing his fingertips across your bare arms, calling your attention by lightly scratching your elbow and placing his hand at the small of your back just above your ass.  

There’s something about tonight that he’s pursuing you openly and assertively while you were letting him and doing nothing to repel him. Perhaps, it’s because you knew that you could have a chance of something...something beyond this.  

Your reverie was interrupted when he suddenly dipped close to your face and inhaled your scent. “You smell sweet.” 

“It’s vanilla.” 

“Are you?” he retorted.  

Heat crawled all over your face, knowing what he meant. You rolled your eyes at him and crossed your arms. “Don’t get me started.” 

Kuroo let out a hearty laugh, which elicited the same for you. In that moment, everything slowed down in his perspective. The crinkles in the corners of your eyes as you smiled and the genuine happiness in your laughter were gripping something inside his chest.  

Oh, how can one woman make him feel all these conflicting emotions at once. How he held so much affection for you yet felt so pained at the walls you’re putting down for him. 

“Are you okay?” You asked, full of concern. 

Kuroo ran a hand through his hair and exhaled exasperatedly. “Nothing- Nothing. It’s...” He calmed himself down. “It’s nothing.”  

“Are you sure?” 

He smiled and a slow melodious song began playing in the background, catching his attention. “May I dance with you?” 

You accepted his invitation. Despite the tension that surrounded the both of you tonight, this one was entirely different. It was romantic how he was swaying you with one of his hands respectfully rested on the small of your back, while the other was holding yours in a classic posture. 

Your eyes were attached to each other, while your heartbeats matched the tempo of the song. All this felt like a fantasy, so pure, so tender and so surreal. It felt like a dream how your chest was filled with happiness and warmth.  

How can one man make you feel so many emotions? Was it really possible for dark desire and deep devotion to exist altogether like how the serene moon finds its rest cloaked in the darkness of the midnight sky? 

“Y/N...” Kuroo uttered with a gentle look in his eyes. “I...” 

He gulped. He was not dumb. Your feelings for him were escalating, strong and true. Damn, how much he wanted to hold you close right now. Devour your lips and kiss you endlessly, but seeing how you gazed so lovingly at him, he couldn’t bear not baring who he really is to you. 

“Thank you,” you said before he could even continue. “I’m honestly super happy today.” 

Guilt was eating him alive. Everything might have started obscurely, but right now, what he was feeling for you was clear, definite and never-changing. Was it really too late? Could he somehow turn back time and change the way things kicked off?  

Kuroo stopped swaying and loosened his hold on you. 

Taking in his crestfallen expression, you asked, “Are you alright?” You saw his broad shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath. “What’s the problem? What’s happening?” 

What’s happening? He loves you! That’s what’s happening.  

How could he tell you? Would you even understand...that for the hundred, no, thousand years he existed, this was the first and only time he could ever think of the same woman over and over again. Would you even believe that the love he had for you was as much as the years he lived? 

Would you see right through his feelings for you, or would he remain as a beast? 

“Kuroo,” your voice pleading as you called on him.  

He pinched close his eyes. 

It’s painful. It’s painful how that one thing that keeps you by his side was also the one that could make you run away.  

He couldn’t bear to see the look in your eyes—that look of disdain because you’d see him as a monster, but he loves you and he couldn’t...He just couldn’t let you suffer perplexed and forever live in an illusion. 

“Do you...do you really want to know?” He asked almost choking in each syllable, with eyes searing deep into yours.  

“What do y-” You were stuck in his stare as his hazel gaze lifted all the fog and haze in your mind. Suddenly, everything was clear. “W-Wai- This is-” Your hands shook cold. “It’s you...All this time it’s you?” Your lips trembled. “M-My cat...the one in my dreams...It’s true? You’re an...” 

You searched his expression and, as much as hurt was evident in his features, he didn’t deny a thing.  

You brought your shaking hand over your mouth as tears began to involuntarily fall from your eyes. “All this time...you were lying to me.” 

Seeing your pain, Kuroo couldn’t help but step forward to explain. “Y/N, I...”  

You stepped back and raised a hand up. “I’m sorry. I just- I just can’t-”  

And all Kuroo could do was stand frozen as he watched you run away.  

The old lady was right all along and you couldn’t believe it. Maybe the signs were there but you refused to see them. 

Did all that matter now? 

You quickly got inside the cab you hailed. Staring outside the window, you recalled every detail of the moments you spent with him. Now, you didn’t know which one was true and which was just a fantasy.  

Incubus or not it didn’t matter anymore.  

Tears kept falling down your cheek.  

Regardless of the truth, you knew that one thing’s for real. You felt so much for him than you ever noticed. Did he even love you at all? All those times you spent did they even mean something to him? Or were you just another woman he can feed on? 

Your head spun in questions.  

Finally at your home, you immediately fell onto your bed and hugged yourself. All this time, he’s all a dream you’re meant to wake up to. 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 

With your body feeling heavy, you couldn’t even bring yourself to get up. A black hole seemed to exist inside your heart. You felt light taps against your shoulder.  

A smile finally made its way to your face.  

You caressed his head as he purred lovingly into your touch. His fur resembled the darkness of the night, but his existence brought warmth into your life.  

He bumped his forehead onto yours and nuzzled affectionately. You caged him in your arms, and he curled up close to you, accompanying you to a peaceful slumber. 

“I love you...I’m setting you free.” 

A soft yet gentle whisper breezed through your ear that woke you up. It felt like a big part of you was taken and torn apart. 

Your fingers traced the outline of the heart pendant of the necklace Kuroo gave you.  

He didn’t appear in your dream like the usual. As much as you tried hard to deny, you...love him in all forms. 

You recalled the hurt in his eyes when he revealed the truth to you last night. It was genuine and it seemed like he, too, was holding off so many emotions he wished to convey. 

Maybe you reacted too fast? Maybe you could’ve let him explain? Maybe you shouldn’t have run away last night? 

Of course, it was never easy to say that he was an otherworldly being. Anyone would be overwhelmed.  

You messed up! 

In an instant, you bolted out of bed. Though you looked so much in disarray, you hurried and prepared for work. You’d be having a post-event meeting today. Maybe you could still make up for everything and set things right, give him a chance. Maybe you could still fix things. 

Running out of breath, you almost ran to your office building. You were so anxious as the elevator was too slow for your liking. Once the doors opened, you briskly walked to your office. 

You released the breath you’d been holding for so long as you saw him, talking to your boss with his back facing at you. You reached out a hand to tap him on his shoulder but he turned around too quick.  

“Oh, you must be Ms. Y/N. It’s a shame Kuroo-san couldn’t make it today, so he sent me instead,” he said as you felt all the life in you drained away.  

In your anticipation, you didn’t even notice the stark difference between the man in front of you and Kuroo. You truly wanted it to be him. You did, but it wasn’t.  

“By the way, he wanted me to give you this,” he handed you a box and you opened it right away.  

It was the collar you gave Mister Midnight. He...He returned it.  

Your head spiraled in disbelief. Your knees felt like melting as you slumped on the nearest chair behind you. Your eyes were filled with triggering tears as you couldn’t help the regret and disappointment to wash over you.    

What if you didn’t run away? What if you had let him explain? What if things didn’t happen this way? 

“Y/N, are you alright?” Your boss asked and you couldn’t even bring yourself to respond and just gave him a look of despair.

"Excuse me. "

You gathered all your strength to stand up, walking out of your office. Everything was caving in on you. It was dizzying and you struggled to walk home. 

He was gone. 

The cat who kept you company in your loneliest days, the man in your dreams who cradled you and kissed you gently when you’re too tired from all the responsibilities and Kuroo who made the silliest joke just to get you laughing amidst the difficulties. 

All gone just like a passing season. 

In your mind played all the memories you had together. If there was a time in your life that you’d go back just to relive again, you would definitely return to the moments you spent with him. You would live that moment, that life all over again, even if it’s just once.  

But things don’t work that way.  

You stopped by the corner where your silly cat first found you. You remembered so well how the streetlamp shed a perfect spotlight on him. Still holding onto the collar he returned to you, your fingers lingered tenderly on the material, recalling all the memories.  

“It’s done.” You instantly shifted your focus. It was the old lady and she was looking at the collar in your hand. “The bond...It’s broken.” 

Uncontrollably, a tear fell down your cheek as you recalled... 

I love you. I’m setting you free. 

TAG LIST: Get tagged on the last chapter. Leave a 😈emoji on the reply section or on my ASK.

— 😈  

@tetzoro @moonartemisia @chibishae34 @jadeisthirsting 

@swimmingtimetravelwolf-blog @joy-laufeyson @swithberry @londonstylesxx 

@kuroos--little--kitten @backinmyphase @waxhers 

@osamwah @elmtree12 @creepyicee @dragonxbabe 

@pineapplesneedrights @villsophie 

@pi-crust @lyqiche @trinxt @everyonesroiting @yutzz  

@mahitomycutieee @shidouryusm @reallyperson27 @lawlzichat 

@docosahexaenoic-san @rinatoshi @prickles-the-penguin @soulessien 

@supahumbreon @kittendazzle @simpforyoubitch 

© NEKOMANAGER - All rights reserved. No work shall be reproduced, reposted, modified, translated in any form or by any means.

[thedancefloorsilly]

𐐪♡︎₊˚ warmth :: kuroo x gn! reader

a short fluff. no warnings needed <3 just cuteness. wc: 496

"kuroo?” you asked, letting your eyes wander from the soft clouds to your friends relaxed face.

he turned toward you, “hm? got something on your mind?”

silence took over, and suddenly words felt like concrete on your lips. your eyes flicked back toward the bright blue sky, with an embarrassed smile being your only response.

“oh c’mon! what is it, _____?” kuroo turned, resting his head onto his elbow to get a good look at you. his tone was playful, but you were aware that if you hadn’t told him soon, kuroo would only persist.

a giggle slipped out from your lips, “I— uh..”.

he was grinning with you, “’I uh’ what?”

“you’re not funny.”

“then why’re you smiling?”

it was so easy to roll your eyes at him, but even if you didn’t have the words to spell it out, you loved him for it anyway. 

you sighed to yourself, a hint of color decorating your cheeks as you closed your eyes, “I...” it took you a moment to try and string together the right words, but even then, your thoughts were blurred out from the adrenaline, “i’m... i’m really glad that we’re here together.”

really? that was the best you could’ve said??

with your eyes still closed you didn’t want to imagine how kuroo would react, what he would think or what he would say. rather than anticipate a response, you found ease in your surroundings. In that short second before kuroo answered, you took in the silent wind caressing your skin, and the grass prickling from underneath.

And also kuroo’s warm hand slowly grasping yours.

wait, what? 

you raised a brow, widening your eyes to see a tender smile on his face as he holds your hand. your face begin to heat up, and you’re unable to look away from his captivating expression.  

“i like you too, if that’s what you were gonna say.”

...

“How’d you kno-”

“how’d you expect me not, too?” he says jokingly, “you’ve had that cute nervous smile this whole time we’ve been together.”

whatever thought previously swimming through your mind vanished, and your face sunk in to a bashful grin.

“Heh, see. There it is again,” kuroo smirks, “Now, are you gonna keep looking at me like that, or are you gonna say what i’ve been desperately wanting to hear?”

You gave a quiet chuckle, “Gee, hasty much?”

He then shakes his head, “If only you knew how patient i’ve been”.

Moving your body closer to his, you lock into each other’s gaze, “I really like you.”

A warm expression takes over his face, while kuroo’s eyes then soften. the world felt quiet, and as composed as he might have looked throughout this entire exchange, and quieter would led you to hear the messy beatings of his heart.

in a brief movement, kuroo then takes the hand you have grasped in his, and plants a soft, kiss onto the back of it.

“And i’ve always liked you”.

[tsukishumai]

Love Galore

pairing: kuroo tetsuro x f!reader x bokuto koutsro

chapter summary: an introspective view of the story's events from the beginning — through the eyes of Akaashi Keiji

wc: 19.2k+ [jfc i really am so sorry]

a/n: thank you to those that have stuck by me and this story, despite my hiatus. i truly appreciate every single person that's ever read a single word of LG, or left lovely messages/comments, from the bottom of my heart, thank you so much. i worked on this chapter, little by little every day, and i promise i never stopped thinking about you guys. i kept thinking it was done, but apparently i had a lot to say haha. this still isn't the end, but please enjoy the chapter, i've worked really hard on it and i hope you like it :) your love and support mean the world to me, xoxo

Masterlist

chapter 14 ✧ souffle pancakes

Akaashi doesn’t say much, but he sees it all. 

It was a habit that he’s had for as long as he could remember, practically born with. Practically second nature, it seems, for him to keep a keen and sharp eye on his surroundings, making mental notes until it’s all piled up and cluttered into his brain. He’s been called many things in his short life. Observant. Perspective. Attentive. Psychic. Genius. Creepy. 

Akaashi prefers to just be called Keiji. 

Most of the time, he thinks it’s a blessing.  

When he was younger, he’d impress all the old ladies in his neighborhood with his mindless comments.

Have you lost weight?

That’s a new jacket isn’t it, oba-san?

Oh, that must be a different perfume you’re wearing today.

Comments that sounded adorable coming from a child, when all the others in his age range could barely notice if they were even wearing matching shoes. 

Sometimes, he’s thankful. It was what got him so far in the sport he loved, after all. His ability to see things others usually just brush to the side — how an opponent grits his teeth and flexes his jaw right before he jumps up for the spike, or the directions their eyes tend to flicker to right before they pass the ball. How the twitch of their lip meant anger and annoyance, or the restless running around the court showing impatience. 

Akaashi sees it all – each bit of information sorted into the compartments in his mind, saving it for when he needs to make his move. This wasn’t something inherent – it was a skill he only learned with time, through trials and errors until his mind became a well-oiled machine. Eventually, it’d become difficult for anyone to escape the sharpness of Akaashi’s eyes, and it’s a skill he’s always used to his own benefit. 

If that player’s angry, it will be easy to bait him. If he’s impatient, then it’s just a matter of time before he makes a mistake. And Akaashi will be right there waiting. 

It was easily applicable outside of the court as well.

In the hallways of school, he’d learned to ignore the giggles and whispers in his wake. Making friends was simple, almost effortless. An off-handed comment about someone’s new haircut, bringing his classmates snacks and drinks as if he had just accidentally bought too much at the convenience store – not a single person thinking twice at the fact that he’d miraculously gotten all their favorites. 

Akaashi was the guy that would notice if you were wearing different nail polish, or if the charms on your backpack were different, would note if you’ve started a new sport or were talking about that new drama just a little bit more often – and he’d say a something that could be compliment, with only a few words at best, but it was enough for you to note that he was paying attention. 

In his second year of junior high, he’d even become quite the hot topic among the girls in his class, because somehow he could always tell who had a crush on who. They’d flock around his desk like vultures, picking at whatever bits and scraps they could get from his carcass until he had no choice but to throw them a bone. 

If you get this bread for Yagi-kun, he’ll really like it. 

Arakawa-san told me he likes girls with short hair. 

Toku-san studies in the library on Wednesdays, you should bring him a drink.

The boys would try to act like they’re not interested in the commotion that always seemed to surround Akaashi. Gossip? That’s for the girls – not something for boys to partake in. But it was only a matter of time before they’d come running to Akaashi for a “psychic reading”, never wanting to admit that all they really wanted was a bit of guidance. 

They’d come running back to him, tittering and snickering whenever his advice would work. Suddenly, he was seen as a genius, a guru – as much as any preteen boy could actually be.

It was easy, really – a person’s body language can often tell you much more than words could ever manage to say, and Akaashi had always been an avid reader. He’d try to tell them as much, try to teach his friends what to look for and where, but alas the ability had still been dubbed a ‘gift’.

But sometimes, it can be a curse. 

For a long while, there were only two kinds of people in Akaashi’s life: those that wanted to use him for his talents, and those that seemed to resent him for it. 

It was actually comical how fast it is for some to turn their backs. Flipping around on him like a switch, taking all the brightness with them and leaving Akaashi alone in the dark. 

He had learned – the hard way – that most people actually quite hated the notion of being perceived. It strikes them with a sense of anxiety that was unfamiliar – not exactly fear, but something akin to uneasiness. The constant feeling of eyes on your back was enough to drive anyone crazy, even more so when you’re meant to be somewhere safe. 

It’s not as if Akaashi was doing it on purpose. Sometimes, he wasn’t even aware he was doing anything at all. He wasn’t watching anyone specifically, but was it his fault if certain things caught his attention? Was it wrong for him to be observant of his surroundings? His classmates were part of his environment, it was only natural for them to be part of his observations as well. It was nothing personal, it was just a habit.

It was difficult to explain as such when a boy from his class called him a stalker for knowing he was in the soccer club, because how else could Akaashi have known? He hardly knew Akaashi. Even though Akaashi pointed out the grass stains on his socks and the pair of cleats peeking out of his bag, the boy still threatened Akaashi to stay far away. 

It was even harder for him to calm the angry girl from two classes over – the one that happened to always eat at the lunch table next to his in the cafeteria. He froze when she stormed up to him, tossing a baby blue hair clip on his table. Steam was billowing out from her eyes, saying she’d only ever spoken a grand total of six words to him, so how the hell does he know her favorite color? Never mind the fact that her earrings, her phone case, her jacket, her thermos, and her bento are all that same color. It was an educated guess, one that was clearly correct if her angry reaction was enough to go by. 

It was frustrating, honestly. Did she even know how pathetic his own classmate looked, sniffing around Akaashi and asking how he should approach the cute girl from class 2-C? Was it really wrong for Akaashi to suggest getting her a hair clip in the same color? What difference did it make whether he figured out random stuff about her or not? 

But the scowl she threw in his direction had almost successfully masked the panic that swept through her eyes. But Akaashi had seen it. 

She was afraid. Of him.

She had called him names then, names he had heard before. Weirdo. Stalker. Creep. Names that never bothered him in the past, but coupled with the look of fright on this girl's face – whose favorite color he knew, but name remained foreign – all of it sounded much harsher than he ever remembered. Especially when she dumped the rest of her milk on the top of his head. 

After that incident, there was a sort of shift in public opinion on Akaashi. The whispers that followed him down the hall no longer mingled with soft giggles and smiles. They were whispers behind narrowed eyes and scowling faces, disapproving frowns upon any lips that would say his name.

Some friends stood by his side, half-heartedly defending him in a way that told him they didn’t actually care – they just wanted to stay on his good side. Nosy busybodies that only shielded him from the wary stares so they could keep asking him for his advice on whether he thought Dairiki-kun like girls with bangs or without.

It was one of the few times Akaashi had really, truly felt pathetic. His life was sitting in the sweaty palms of his peers, and a single wrong move will have him crushed by their grubby little fingers. It was infuriating, suffocating – having to think twice, thrice, four times before Akaashi could even say a single word. 

But they had already decided on the box they would put Akaashi in, and he could do nothing more than sit still. Sit still and ignore the sneers and scowls from people that he used to call friends. Stay quiet when the boys of his class would shove him around the halls calling him freak. Look the other way when he’d come back to his desk and his things were destroyed. Ignore the pang in his chest when he ate his lunches alone in the library. 

At the turn of his adolescence – his first year of high school – Akaashi decided that things needed to change. 

Fukurodani Academy was a different setting – different classes, different halls, different people.

He would be a different Akaashi Keiji. No longer putting himself out there, or offering his observations to anyone who would listen. He would just keep to himself, and not let anyone close enough to contain him again.

Then he met Bokuto Kotaro. 

The boy was simplistic in nature. Kind and bright, with a horde of people that always followed him around wherever he went. Dozens of eyes constantly tracked his every move without fail, and Bokuto happened to be the type of person that thrived in such an environment. Though, despite being interested in the same sport, Akaashi never felt the need to become a part of his entourage. He was exactly the kind of guy Akaashi wanted – needed –  to avoid. 

But some things are simply not up to him. Each morning, he managed to mask the slight surprise on his face each time he walked into the volleyball team’s gym, and found that Bokuto was already there. And had probably been there for who knows how long. When Akaashi joined this team, he fully expected to always be the first to show up, and last to leave the gym each day, just as it was at his previous school. 

Yet, there Bokuto was, every morning without fail, nothing but his grunts and the echoes of the ball spiking on the ground filling the gym. Every morning, he’d greet Akaashi with too much energy, the corners of his lips never dropping despite the fact that Akaashi never responded with anything other than a silent nod. 

For a little while, that was all they had. A silent agreement to work together on the sport they loved, to be a team on the court, and strictly teammates off of it. Nothing more, nothing less. Bokuto continued being his charming self, scoring victories and basking in adoration as he was wont to do. Akaashi stood content to the side, satisfied with the joy of knowing his serves were in the capable hands of such an ace. 

Akaashi should have known that it was only a matter of time until Bokuto would flip everything around. 

They had been alone in the gym for at least an hour at that time, while the rest of Fukurodani Volleyball Club had gone home at an actual reasonable hour. The sun was already slipping past the horizon, taking with it the last tendrils of the day’s light. Bokuto had begged Akaashi to stay a little longer and help with his spikes, as usual. And Akaashi was quick to agree, as usual. 

What was unusual was the way Bokuto kept glancing at Akaashi from the corner of his eye, and Akaashi wanted to laugh at Bokuto’s pathetic excuse of being discreet.

“What is it?” Akaashi asked, uncharacteristically breaking the silence. 

Bokuto jumped, startled that Akaashi noticed him watching. It took a second for Bokuto to gather himself, absentmindedly bouncing the volleyball on the gleaming gym floor, face scrunched in a way that Akaashi had only seen while Bokuto was on the court.

“I wanted to ask you something,” Bokuto opened with those words, bouncing the ball one last time before catching it tightly in his hands. Akaashi’s silence was the only indicator of an agreement, and Bokuto took this as his cue to continue. 

“Why do you hold back?” 

There were many things Akaashi thought Bokuto might have asked. This one wasn’t even really on the list. Akaashi had forgotten what it felt like to be caught so off guard, unable to do anything but stand stupidly as his mind buffered. Bokuto’s pupils moved imperceptibly quickly, raking themselves all over Akaashi. 

“I’m not sure what you mean,” Akaashi replied carefully, his shoulders rigid, nervously clasping his hands in front of him.

Bokuto frowned a little deeper, resting the volleyball now between his arm and his hip. “You don’t have to lie, Akaashi. I can tell you’re not… I see how you watch everything, but you always catch yourself before doing anything. It’s like you’re scared or… or – I don’t know! But you are, you’re holding back! I can just tell.”

It took all of Akaashi’s willpower not to let his jaw hang loose, only allowing himself to blink slowly. He dug through his mind, searching through every crevice for any memory of someone being able to read him like this. He went out of his way to be invisible, yet the overly cheerful, happy go lucky, sunshine ace of the volleyball team had somehow managed to still see right through him. 

“So why?” Bokuto prodded again, and his tone could easily be confused as haughty, but Akaashi knew better. Akaashi continues to study Bokuto, the poor boy fidgeting under Akaashi’s frigid stare. But he doesn’t move, doesn’t back away. His weight shifted from one foot to the other, but he still waited for an answer

“It’s a long story,” Akaashi said quietly, turning around to walk towards the volleyball cart. 

He hoped that would be the end of it, that Bokuto would take the hint and leave him alone. But before he could take more than three steps toward the cart, it clattered loudly and rolled away with the momentum of the volleyball that just landed into it from across the gym. 

Akaashi turns back to Bokuto, a single eyebrow raised incredulously at Bokuto’s now empty hands. A corner of Bokuto’s mouth lifts devilishly, and he offers Akaashi nothing but a shrug of his shoulders.

“I’ve got a bit of time,” Bokuto rests his hands on his hips, shifting all his weight onto one leg. Akaashi wanted to laugh, wanted to cry, and wanted to ask Bokuto why he even cared. He was happy with how things were right now, and there was no need for him to do anything drastic. 

Even as the thought passed through his mind, Akaashi could feel no truth behind it. And one look at Bokuto told him that he was not winning this round. He crossed his arms in front of his chest, and heaved out a sigh.

“If I don’t hold myself back, then people tend to get intimidated,” Akaashi offered, and that was as much as he was willing to expand on at this moment. “And when people are scared of you… that’s when you find out how nasty they can actually be.” 

“So what? You’re scared?” Bokuto asked, and Akaashi scoffed because of course he wouldn’t understand. Everyone loved Bokuto, and even those that didn’t still held some sort of respect for him. He was the ace of the volleyball team, and he was the school’s heartthrob. What the hell would he know about being shunned and isolated?

Akaashi opened his mouth to say something snarky, the words burning up his throat and on to the tip of his tongue. Except when his lips parted, it wasn’t his voice that came out.

“If you hold yourself back because of random, faceless people, then aren’t you letting them win?” Bokuto interrupted Akaashi before he could speak, as if he knew that if he let the setter say whatever he was about to say, then the conversation would take a dive into the worst. “I hate losing, Akaashi.”

“What does me losing have anything to do with you?” Akaashi asked.

“Because we’re partners now. I got your back, and if you lose, I lose,” Bokuto smiled this time, and Akaashi’s chest felt a little bit lighter, “Like I said, I hate losing. So don’t make me into a loser, okay? Or it’s gonna be a problem.”

Bokuto brushes past Akaashi as he finishes speaking, hands resting on the back of his head as he walks the distance across the gym and to the volleyball cart. Akaashi’s eyes followed him in awe, a sudden fluttering in his heart and stomach as the ace digs out a new volleyball and bounces it twice onto the hardwood floors.

“We’ve only done eighty serves,” Bokuto changes the topic seamlessly, continuing on as if he hadn’t rendered Akaashi speechless, “We gotta do at least twenty more before Yamiji-san comes back to kick us out.” 

Akaashi felt his feet move, his arms positioning themselves to receive, his body running around the gym until sweat dripped on the floor all around him. But his thoughts were elsewhere, plagued with memories of a past that had apparently silenced him into a pathetic existence. He’d thought this path would be better, make him feel like he belonged.

Maybe for a while, he convinced himself that it did, satisfied with existing as a shadow on the wall. He hadn’t anticipated Fukurodani's golden-eyed Adonis to shatter the illusion with so much ease, Akaashi wonders how he ever fooled himself into believing it in the first place. 

They didn’t say a single word to each other for the rest of their practice. Or on the walk home. Or at morning practice the next day. Bokuto didn’t speak to Akaashi until the middle of their afternoon practice, when Akaashi had received every single one of Konoha’s spikes and gave Bokuto elegant, risky serves that had everyone on the other side of the net scrambling on their feet. 

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Bokuto exclaimed while pumping his fist, giving Akaashi a pat on the back that made the setter jerk forward two steps, “Keep that up, Akaashi!”

Akaashi rubbed the back of his neck, tilting his head slightly to the side. That’s when he noticed the thumbs up Bokuto had thrown you from across the court, and the relieved smile you returned as you flipped the numbers on the scoreboard. You and Bokuto held each other’s gazes for a moment longer, and Akaashi felt like he’d eavesdropped on an entire conversation. 

You shivered slightly when Bokuto broke away, as if Akaashi’s icy stare washed over your entire body. Then you turned your head unnaturally quick and met Akaashi’s stare dead on, making him jolt. You offered him a small wave and half a grin, but before he could respond, Bokuto was dragging him back into the game. 

After practice, Akaashi found Bokuto waiting for him by the gates of the school. He flew into an immediate tirade about the bad grade he got on his exam, and how the cafeteria ran out of katsu before he could get there. You showed up in the middle of Bokuro’s story, and the three of you started walking in sync towards the direction of Akaashi’s house, your voice mingling with Bokuto’s as you offered your own tidbits of the day. Akaashi didn’t question how you both knew where he lived, or why he was suddenly flanked by the two chattiest students in Fukurodani. But if Akaashi had known that was how it would all begin, then he might have cherished that moment a little bit more. 

He never really spoke to you during his initial months in the club, which isn’t saying much as he didn’t speak to anyone. You were nice enough – always asked him how he was doing, berating the older ones whenever they’d give him a hard time, giving him reassuring smiles whenever he got scolded for messing up. The perfect example of a manager; your only fault being the nonsensical hearts in your eyes whenever they happened to land on Bokuto. 

You tried to hide it desperately, but there was no hiding the affection in your smiles whenever they were directed toward Bokuto. It was obvious, painfully so, and it bewildered Akaashi that Bokuto still had not noticed. He can at least assume Yukie and Kaori knew, if the worried glances they threw at each other behind your back were of any indication. But if they or anyone else on the team were aware of your feelings, they respected your efforts enough to keep their thoughts to themselves. 

He couldn’t blame you, not in the slightest. Not when Akaashi’s own heart skipped a beat or two during the night of that initial confrontation, and suddenly he himself was enamored by the ace – wanted to give him the best serves, set up the best plays, win him all the games. When Bokuto was on the court, then it was natural law of the universe for Akaashi to use every skill in his arsenal to make sure he shines. Akaashi did not choose for it to be this way, it simply is.

Perhaps that was how it was for you as well, Akaashi thought. Sometimes, the most painful part about love is having no choice, the complete loss of control. Akaashi could see it; the groan after each stolen glance, shaking him off when his hug made your face too hot,  how you would slap your cheeks whenever you caught yourself staring, like a desperate attempt to break yourself out of some wretched spell.

If Akaashi was being honest, he hated seeing you that way. It didn’t take long for you to become someone precious to him, maybe even quicker than it took for Bokuto. Bokuto infuriated Akaashi as easily as he amazed him, each day a toss up on whether he admired him or wanted to strangle him.

But you brought Akaashi comfort, and a sense of understanding he’d never experienced from a friend. Sure, technically it was your job to assist the team, but he could tell that everything you did truly came from your heart. You were kind and selfless, the type of person that would give someone the very shirt off your back but still spit venom at anyone that spoke ill of your friends. 

To have you in his corner, Akaashi couldn’t even begin to explain how much it saved him. He’d been drowning in the middle of an ocean, nearly overpowered by turbulent waves when Bokuto had given him a boat, and you’d given him an oar. As long as he remained with the two of you, then Akaashi thought he could get himself through it all. 

So whenever he would watch you watch Bokuto flex his muscles to the girls cheering in the stands during a game, watch you gripping your clipboard so hard your knuckles turned white, he may feel... a little bit more than annoyed. And whenever Bokuto would then openly flirt with some of those girls after the game, Akaashi could admit that he might even feel a little bit upset.

Because how could he not see the way you look at him, how you smile when he says your name, how you trail after him like a lovesick puppy? At this point, Akaashi’s been friends with the two of you for months, won and lost countless games, gone to training camps, spent more time with each other than with your own families. And the entire time, Akaashi had to work very hard to act like he didn’t notice your feelings. How could Bokuto still be so ignorant? 

It really bothered him a lot more than he cared to admit, and it surprised him. Akaashi never expected to care about you the way he does, but there it was. Maybe it was this comfortable closeness between you that propelled Akaashi to act so boldly, in a way he couldn’t bring himself to in a long time. 

At the end of one of these unsavory games, while Bokuto busied himself with trying to get the number of a cheerleader in the stand, Akaashi scanned the court for a second, stopping only when his eyes landed on you. You were comparing your notes with the coach, and Akaashi waited until you finished speaking and Yamiji-san stalked off to scold someone else before he approached. 

“Keiji! There you are, I wanted to talk to about your receives in the first set, you –”

“Are you ever going to tell him?” Akaashi asked, not even registering what you were saying. You might have been irritated at his interruption if you hadn’t been confused by the seemingly random question he just threw at your face.

“What? Tell who what?” 

“Bokuto,” Akaashi crossed his arms and straightened his back, “Are you ever going to tell him how you feel?”

You blinked at him once, the only indication that you heard what Akaashi said. He stood facing you, and the seconds seemed to stretch as you did nothing but stare back. The cacophony of sounds that usually bounced along the walls of the gym suddenly sounded muffled and dull. Your lips twitched slightly before they spread into a rehearsed grin, your face slipping easily into a mask of casual indifference.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Keiji,” you answered him softly, shaking your head. 

“Come on, Y/N,” Akaashi groaned, “You know exactly –”

“No, I really don’t,” you said almost pleadingly, your eyes darting around the gym, a mixture of sadness and relief in them when you see Bokuto still showing off to the girls that descended from the bleachers. You look back at Akaashi, brows furrowed as you said, “I don’t know what would make you even think that. Bokuto’s my best friend – that’s it. God, Akaashi, you should really be careful about what you say. If someone heard you, they might have gotten the wrong idea.”

You shot him another hard look – almost a glare, and one that he could read very well, that told him you knew he knew you were lying, that said please, just play along – before you made an excuse of gathering up all the other players for the bus back to school. 

Akaashi’s feet felt stuck to the ground, an achingly familiar helplessness sluicing through him as you walked away. He couldn’t even bring himself to move until Bokuto threw an arm around his shoulder to drag him out, finally done with his flirting and ready to go home. 

You were already seated on the bus when Bokuto and Akaashi finally deigned to board. The seat beside you was occupied by a chattering Yukie, who refused to move despite Bokuto’s complaints of always being the one that sits next to you. You laughed sheepishly and yelled claims of ‘manager bonding’ and doing everything you could to avoid meeting Akaashi’s eye. 

That was the tone of your relationship for the next few weeks. An awkward tension that no one else seemed to notice but you and him. You didn’t treat him any differently – you still greeted him with a smile, walked home together everyday, still messed with him during practice. You still asked him about his day, and told him about yours and Akaashi almost could have convinced himself that nothing was wrong. 

But everything you did started to feel like an act. Disingenuous, like a robot following a set program. You stopped sitting next to Bokuto at lunch, started walking to classes with your other friends instead. Your eyes started flicking to Akaashi whenever you felt you laughed too loudly at Bokuto’s jokes, and you latched yourself to the other players, throwing everyone off kilter. 

You were going out of your way to prove a point that only Akaashi could understand, and even when Bokuto himself had pointed out your strange behavior, you simply brushed him off. There was a sense of insecurity that Akaashi knew he instilled in your actions, and it brought a twinge of regret that he never wanted to feel when it came to you. 

Akaashi had been pouring over how to remedy the situation for days when an olive branch came in the form of Bokuto’s new girlfriend. 

She was a girl from another school, and he met her after one of their games. She came over to their side of the court and congratulated Bokuto for thoroughly defeating her team. She was very pretty and he liked her smile, so Bokuto had asked her out, and she was very quick to say yes. She was waiting for him one day after practicing, standing patiently at the entrance gates with a bag of homemade cookies in her hand. 

Bokuto was so excited as he ran out of the gym to meet her, sparing one minute to ask Akaashi to let you know where he’d gone. Akaashi supposed it was a little comforting to know that Bokuto genuinely cared about you, even if it was encased with his own selfishness. 

Akaashi waited until the rest of the volleyball club had emptied the gym before he made his way into the equipment room. He could hear your sniffling before he even opened the door, his heart slowly crumbling when he walked in on you crouched behind the volleyball cart. 

You sat on the floor, hugging your knees to your chest. Your forehead rested against your knees, and your quiet sobs filled the tiny room. You didn’t bother to look up as Akaashi approached, and fought his own tears as your shoulders shook with every breath. 

He kneeled in front of you quietly, silently debating with himself before he placed a tender hand on your shoulder. You continued to cry, taking uneven, shaky breaths. You didn’t move from your position, and Akaashi briefly wondered if you’d even registered his presence. 

“Did he leave?” You asked suddenly, voice thick and hoarse.

“Yes,” Akaashi answered. 

Slowly, you lifted your head to face him. Your eyes were puffed and swollen, eyes rimmed with red and cheeks stained with tears. Snot dribbled down your nose disgracefully, and there was a sorry attempt on your part to wipe away the evidence of your heartbreak. The sleeves you’d worn your heart on were now soaked with salty tears, and you couldn’t control the tremble of your lips. 

Akaashi didn’t know what else to do other than wrap his arms around you. The position was awkward and he’s pretty sure he’d actually never hugged you before. He felt you stiffen for a second, almost making him pull back. But then you buried your face into the crook of his neck and cried. Akaashi could feel his shirt begin to soak, but he pulled you tighter against him. 

He had no idea how long he held you for, but he stayed there in that smelly old equipment room and he held you until his knees ached and you had no more tears left to give. 

Neither of you spoke once you were done, giving him a sad smile as you pulled away. He didn’t offer one back, but he helped you up to your feet and kept an arm around your shoulder as you both walked out silently. Akaashi knew there was nothing he could say to soothe the pain, and you didn’t look like you wanted to say a single word about it anyway. 

He simply walked home with you as usual, taking the long way around to ensure you both end up walking by your favorite takoyaki stand. He spent the money he was saving in his wallet for a rainy day, and bought you all the food you could eat. He had even gotten your favorite popsicle from the convenience store by your house, and though you still remained silent, he was happy to see you eat everything he gave you. 

By the time Akaashi dropped you off at your front door, the tears were long gone and the moon was high in the sky. You turned to Akaashi, nervously fiddling with your fingers as you tried to find the words. Akaashi smiled to himself, and reached out to pat his hand lightly on the top of your head.

“It’ll be okay,” he said, hoping you’d believe him. The lonely smile you gave him tells him you don’t, but you hug each other one last time anyway before saying your goodbyes.

Akaashi remembered the first time you and Bokuto successfully broke through his brick walls. Broke might have been too gentle of a word for it though – smashed through might be better. It was at the start of his second season with Fukurodani, and he was still riding the high of an amazing first year. He was ready for an even better year, ready to try out his new skills at the first practice match Yamiji-san had arranged with a school the team had never played with before. 

Then a familiar voice called his name from the other side of the court. A few familiar faces from a life he was desperate to forget peered at him through the net, chuckling and laughing and asking him where the hell he’s been for the past year? Akaashi froze – completely and pathetically froze. It was only after six missed serves and accidentally smacking Bokuto in the back of the head with a ball did Yamiji-san finally tire of his antics and benched him for the rest of the game. 

Akaashi ran to the locker rooms as soon as practice was over. He didn’t acknowledge his old classmates, didn’t even pretend to be polite or engage in empty pleasantries. Instead, he hid in one of the shower stalls until the rest of the team left and he was absolutely sure there would be no one left to see him leave. 

But when he exited the stall, there you were. Standing next to Bokuto in a locker room he was absolutely sure you weren’t allowed to be in, with your hands on your hip and brows etched in concern. The two of you cornered him, and barricaded him until he fessed up about what the hell just happened on that court. Akaashi was a resilient man, but even he could do nothing against you two. 

So he told you everything – from his ‘guru’ days to the milk dumping incident to the isolation and bullying – everything. He didn’t stop speaking for what felt like hours, but neither you nor Bokuto interrupted him once, allowing him to regurgitate everything he’d been holding in for years. 

When he was done, he wasn’t sure what he expected. Pity, or sympathy or something like that. But, no. Instead, when he looked at the faces of his two best friends, all he saw was anger. Clenched fists, tight jaws, fire burning in eyes – anger. And it made him happy. Whatever happened in his past didn’t matter, because here, he had two people who were willing to get angry on his behalf. 

He thought he couldn’t get any closer to you than he was at that moment. But he was wrong.

Walking away from your doorstep, Akaashi knew the bond between the two of you was solidified after this – having already seen each other at your worst, taking turns being each other’s salvation. You become more than his friend, you were his sister. Sister in pain, sister in darkness, sister in light. There wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for you, and you for him. 

Thinking back, the sobbing was probably a bit of an overreaction. A little dramatic considering Bokuto had broken up with that girl not even three weeks later. He was crying and moaning about it for about ten minutes until you promised to take him to his favorite yakiniku spot, and he never thought about that girl again. 

Things would go back to normal for a little while – the three of you acting as reckless teenagers do when they had free reign over the streets of Tokyo. Sitting in cafes sharing one drink for four hours, getting scolded by the coach for staying in the gym too long, laughing and arguing over the most ridiculous reasons that Bokuto turned emo. 

Until Bokuto meets his next girlfriend. Then your heart breaks into a million pieces, and Akaashi tries to hold you together. Then Bokuto breaks up with his girlfriend, and comes running back with crocodile tears in his eyes. You’d catch him again with open arms, and things are alright for a little while until the ugly cycle starts over again. 

Akaashi tried not to let himself wonder why you allowed yourself to accept this – allow Bokuto to put you through it over and over again. He told himself that he didn’t really care, it wasn’t any of his business. Whether you told Bokuto your true feelings or not was your prerogative, and Akaashi wouldn’t do anything but respect your decisions. Even if the decision seemed borderline masochistic. 

Akaashi is forced to simply brush off his irritation at his best friend, because Bokuto was so painfully unaware of what he’d been doing. And if Bokuto was too stupid to see what was right in front of his eyes, then Akaashi was not interested in being the one to enlighten him. 

Ultimately, Akaashi does what he does best – keep his mouth shut and his thoughts to himself. He would listen to every single complaint Bokuto would have about his girlfriends, but he never dared offer his own opinions. He allowed you to drag him to whatever random activity would keep your mind off your own issues, but he never outwardly acknowledged the hurt you always tried to hide. 

And as horrible it is to say, the girls never lasted very long. A month, maybe two at the most. Hardly enough time for Akaashi to memorize any names, as cruel as that sounded. Soon enough, they would complain about his training schedule, or whine about how he hangs out with his friends a bit too much, and that was all it took for Bokuto to cut it off. Bokuto’s priorities always remained the same, and that at least was something Akaashi happily gave him credit for. 

By the time college rolled around, you had even started dating. No one else had ever successfully managed to ensnare your attention for more than five minutes, but Akaashi appreciated seeing you try. Though he admits it was rather amusing to see Bokuto so fervently talk shit about any person you had even a remote interest in, and maybe a little bit more than satisfying to see Bokuto finally be the one on the other side. 

Bokuto, surprisingly, never actually brought any of his girlfriends around. He talked about them, and on occasion, he would invite them to some of his games, but that was it. It was odd, because Bokuto had always struck Akaashi as the type that wanted his partner cheering for him at every opportunity they could get, and would want to hear their voice screaming his name from the stands. But on the rare occasion he actually allowed any of them to come watch him, Bokuto was quick to usher them out of the gym before anyone could even introduce themselves.

It bewildered Akaashi to no end. Was it because he was ashamed?Akaashi’s met at least two girlfriends, and Bokuto’s gone on double dates with Konoha and Washio. Was he hiding his girlfriends from you?

Did he finally get a taste of his own medicine when he saw you kiss that guy in your psych class? Was Bokuto trying to spare you the pain? Akaashi didn’t really want to think of the implications if that statement were true. 

Well, out of sight, out of mind was a set up that worked for him very well.

And more importantly, it worked well enough for you. Worked for Bokuto as well, apparently. He didn’t want to see any of your flings, and you were better off not seeing any of his. A nauseating song and dance that only the two of you knew the steps for. Neither of you were willing to be each other's partner, satisfied to let the opportunity suspend in the air between you, yet never reaching out to take it. 

But hey, if you’re fine with it, then Akaashi could work with this. He could live with this.

That was until Hikari came along. 

Akaashi was honestly a little surprised – Hikari wasn’t typically the type of woman that Bokuto would tangle himself with. That wasn’t to say anything about her looks, or her personality – she was very much Bokuto’s type. But she had already been an essential part of at least one aspect of his life before they started dating, and it was unusual for Bokuto to allow a relationship to transpire with someone so close – the manager of his team, at that. Bokuto always dated outside the proximity of his circle; someone that went to another school, or one that he met at the gym, or sat next to him in one of his classes. 

Never anyone too close. Never anyone that would matter if he lost them. 

But apparently, Hikari was a woman on a mission. Akaashi knew it from the first time he met her, could see it in the wolfish gleam in her eyes as she watched Bokuto from across the room.

He was a little taken aback, but not all that shocked when you came home from that party, practically giving him a heart attack when you burst through the front door and stormed directly to the couch. You didn’t spare him a glance before you face planted onto the cushions, buried your face into the decorative pillows he’d spent two hours picking, and let out the most ungodly scream he’d ever heard. 

You didn’t have to tell him what happened; Akaashi could easily guess. 

“What’s wrong with you?” he still asked slowly, afraid any sudden movements might cause you to lunge. 

“I wish I knew,” your voice was muffled, not bothering to lift your head from the pillow. 

A nagging voice in his head told him he should have stayed at that party, to be your emotional support at the very least if nothing else. He mentally kicked himself, glaring at the laptop he sat in front of, and the blinking document of his unfinished part in the group project he was meant to present to his group mates in the morning. As if the assignment was responsible for his failure. 

You’d be safe if he left, he reasoned with himself. The volleyball team was full of idiots, but they were all good guys. Besides, Bokuto was there and there wasn’t a single chance in hell anything bad would happen to you while he was around. And if Bokuto was too drunk, then Kuroo at least would make sure you all got home safely.  He’d even set himself up on the dining room table so he could see you walk through the front door with his own two eyes. 

Because he had fully expected you to walk through those doors with Bokuto in tow like you’ve done dozens of times, and the fact that you arrived in the dead of night alone was enough to make Akaashi’s blood pressure rise. 

He stood from his chair and walked the few short steps to the fridge. He opened the freezer door, pushing through packets of frozen meat until he found the cream puff flavored ice cream that you had to special order online. He grabs the pint and two spoons before he makes his way to the couch. 

You didn’t move when he pushed your leg to the side, sitting on the opposite side of the sofa. You didn’t move when he nudged your calves with his knuckles and asked you to sit up before you suffocated. So he just leaned back, tossing the lid of the ice cream pint onto the coffee table before digging in. 

It’d been two bites of ice cream and one minute later when you slowly maneuver yourself to sit up. Akaashi tried to pretend not to notice you, but it was impossible when you snatched the extra spoon and the entire pint out of his hand in one fluid motion.

“Jesus, watch out for my fingers,” he mumbled, smirking at the glare you shot his way. But you only held the fake contempt until the first spoon of your favorite dessert hit your lips – then you were sighing and leaning your head against Akaashi’s shoulder.

He patted a hand on your knee, reaching over for a scoop of ice cream and chuckling when you blocked his spoon with yours. You tried to hide the ice cream from him, but his arms were long, and he easily snatched the pint back. 

“Hey!” you cried out, and Akaashi quickly conceded before you really took out a finger. 

“How’d you get home?” Akaashi asked, lifting his feet to rest them on the coffee table and leaning his head against yours.

“Kuroo walked me home,” you replied quietly.

“Good.”

Neither of you said another word as you let the quiet of the evening envelope you, not a single sound save for the occasional clashing of spoons when you both reached for another bite. He could feel you slowly ease beside him, the tension in your body melting away with each passing minute.

When the ice cream was finished, the empty pint decorated your table, along with two spoons haphazardly tossed, surrounded by splotches of melted cream that was sure to be a pain to clean. Your breathing was steady, and the time on the clock read ‘Akaashi is going to be exhausted in the morning’. 

He didn’t care, though. You hadn’t moved or spoken in a while now, and Akaashi was convinced you were already asleep. He already prepared himself to spend the night on the couch, your head on his shoulder and his body twisted in a way that was sure to make his back ache the next day. 

He was just seconds away from giving into sleep’s lovely tug when you broke the silence. 

“I saw him with…” you said, fiddling with the hem of your shirt and clearing your throat, “It was Hikari.”

Akaashi sighed, reaching a hand up to pat your head. 

“Are you okay?” he asked again, a pitiful question that he’s repeated to you countless times.

He waited for your usual answer – vehement denial that anything could be possibly wrong, an airy dismissal of his concerns, and a change in conversation so effortless, it almost makes Akaashi forget what he was saying to you in the first place.

This time, though – this time, a weighted silence followed his question, and you looped an arm around his, hugging him firmly.

“Not really,” you admitted softly. 

It was the first time Akaashi had ever heard you confess your heartache. It was always something that was unspoken, and seeing your crumpled face made Akaashi regret ever keeping things that way. He turned fully to wrap himself around you gently, and you gave yourself to his embrace. He’d only heard a sniffle or two, but he could feel the moisture slowly seeping into his t-shirt. It was a feeling that was achingly familiar. 

“Come on, now. Didn’t we say crying over boys was… I think your words were ‘so fucking embarrassing’,” Akaashi mumbled into your hair, smiling when he felt you chuckle against him. His stomach turned at the inadequacy of his words, but he had no idea what else to offer, so he simply offered himself. “I’m here for you, okay? Always.”

You pulled back for a moment to give him a watery smile. Akaashi wiped at your tear stained cheeks.

“Literally, your snot is dripping down to your mouth, and it’s disgusting.” 

Your laughter warmed Akaashi’s cheeks, smacking him on the shoulder before you stood up. You said nothing else as you stalked off into the darkness of your bedroom, not bothering to turn on any lights before shutting the door. 

A myriad of emotions swirled through Akaashi as he remained seated on the couch. Was there more that he could have said? Could have done? If he had stayed at the party, would he have been able to stop this from happening? Was it even any of his business to stop it? 

But Akaashi knows himself, and knows he would have said nothing if he saw Bokuto sneak away with Hikari. He would have done nothing except perhaps usher you to the other side of the house, using whatever means to keep you distracted. Even if he was there, all he could have done was spare you the knowledge of it – at least for one night. 

He couldn’t help but feel as if he failed you then – to be a good friend, a brother. Or maybe he’s failed you for years. You’d never see it that way, could never even fathom the notion of his failure, and somehow that thought bothers Akaashi more. 

Akaashi stood up and stalked to his own room. He shut the door and collapsed onto his bed, hatred pumping from his heart through his veins as he drifted off to sleep. 

It was that lingering hate he could still feel churning in his gut when he awoke the next morning that spurred him out of bed and scurrying into the living room. He had every intention of starting the day as a new man – one who didn’t allow his cowardice consume him, didn’t place the comfort of his wellbeing over the needs of those he loved. 

Those were the thoughts that ran through his mind, but his momentum halted instantly when he rounded the corner of the hallway, and saw you standing in the genkan. You looked like you had just rolled out of bed yourself, eyes swollen and still wearing the clothes from last night. Your hand rested on the doorknob, the front door wide open.

You turned to him as he approached, and gave him an almost pleading look. Akaashi only had to wonder why you were distressed for two seconds before Bokuto barrelled through the doorway, way too loudly and looking much too bright for the hour. 

Akaashi has seen this dance before. He’s seen it so many times, the sequence of it already playing out in his mind like a familiar melody. Bokuto comes in with a plan that sounded equal parts ridiculous and exhausting, dragging you out without even asking. Akkashi scoffed as you tried and failed to ward off Bokuto with pathetic excuses, but as usual he was having none of it. And both you and Akaashi knew better than to think you could win against Bokuto Kotaro. 

He stood aside while you flurried around the apartment like a blizzard storm, fighting the frown at how Bokuto stood in the foyer with his hands on his hips, a satisfied and smug look on his face. Bokuto turned to Akaashi as if he’d just noticed him for the first time, slapping him on the shoulder before asking, “Akaashi! Why do I feel like I didn’t even see you at all last night?”

It was an effort not to lift a hand and smack Bokuto in the back of the head right then and there. But thankfully, you came rushing out of your bedroom, hastily grabbing a pair of shoes from the genkan. You shot him one last apologetic glance, and you were out the door before he could even bid you goodbye. 

And there he stood – alone in the foyer of his own apartment, feeling like nothing more than a fly on the wall. 

A glance at the clock was the only thing that could have set him in motion, already running ten minutes later than he wanted to start his day. From the tornado named Bokuto that just passed, and the flurry in which Akaashi himself now dashed around, it seemed the apartment was destined to be chaotic. 

He was impatiently tapping his fingers on the kitchen counter, glaring at his coffee machine as if his sheer will would somehow make the brew drip faster, when there was another knock on the door. 

The day was already filled with chaos, but apparently also surprises, because the last person he expected to see on the other side of the threshold was Kuroo Tetsuro. 

The two boys blinked at each other for a second, Kuroo looking just as confused as Akaashi as to why he came to visit in the first place. Kuroo shifted his weight from one foot to the other with his hands tucked in his front pockets, offered Akaashi a nervous smile and a lukewarm attempt at small talk before finally asking if you were still asleep inside. 

Akaashi sighed as he delivered the unfortunate news that not only were you already awake, but were currently being dragged no doubt halfway across the city by none other than Kuroo’s very own roommate. 

“Do you guys not communicate or something,” Akaashi asked blandly, and Kuroo just shrugged.

“He wasn’t there when I got home last night, and he wasn’t there when I woke up this morning. What do you want from me?” 

Akaashi rolled his eyes, but he still widened the door for Kuroo to slip through, who only smiled at him sheepishly as he entered the apartment. Akaashi asked if he wanted some coffee, and Kuroo graciously accepted, slipping back into the easy, laid-back attitude that he’d always been known to wear. 

Content to leave Kuroo to his own devices, Akaashi darted back into his room to quickly change. When he emerged eight minutes later, fully clothed and his backpack dangling from his shoulder, Kuroo was filling up his thermos with coffee while Akaashi’s already sat waiting for him at the counter. 

Akaashi nodded his head in thanks, Kuroo handing him his cup as the two walked out of the apartment in tandem. He didn't say anything when Kuroo remained in step with him, chattering about his classes as they embarked on the twenty minute walk to campus. Didn’t even consider that it was a weekend, and Kuroo likely didn’t even have to head in this direction so early at all. 

Kuroo stayed with Akaashi as far as the library entrance, the latter almost entering the building before he finally had the frame of mind to wonder, “Wait, so why’d you stop by the apartment today?” Akaashi looked over his shoulder and adjusted his bag a bit higher, “Sorry, I was too distracted by… everything. Did you need something?”

Kuroo chuckled almost guiltily, a crooked smile on his lips. He rubbed at the back of his neck, looking everywhere but at Akaashi as if he was debating whether he wanted to tell him the truth. 

“Oh, ha,” Kuroo breathed out, shaking his head slightly, “No, I was just – I mean, y/n looked pretty out of it last night. And I was about to,” Kuroo cleared his throat and adjusted his shirt, “I was heading to that cafe – you know, the one in front of that seven eleven? – and I thought I’d check in to see if she was alive.”

Akaashi’s eyes softened in understanding, pressing his lips into a thin line and nodding his head once as he turned to face Kuroo fully and offered him half a smile.

“Thanks for taking her home last night, by the way,” said Akaashi, “She’s lucky you were still at the party.”

Kuroo let out a breathy laugh and shook his head. He takes a strap of his own backpack off his shoulder and flips it to the front, holding it against his chest as he hastily pulls open the zipper.

“Yeah, it was just good timing,” Kuroo replied while he continued to dig through his backpack. He eventually pulls out a few red packets and hands them to Akaashi, “Here. It’s red ginseng. I’m not sure how long you’re planning to be here, but it should help you get through the day.” 

Akaashi examined the red packets in his hand, almost pouting with appreciation to Kuroo. But when he lifted his head, Kuroo was already walking across the courtyard.

“Make sure to give one of those to y/n when you see her!” He yelled over his shoulder, waving at Akaashi one last time before taking off. 

Akaashi did eat the red ginseng, and it did help him get through the seven hours he had spent in the library that day. And he never thought twice about Kuroo’s impromptu visit to his apartment that morning, nor did he think twice about being escorted to the library despite the cafe Kuroo mentioned being on the complete opposite side of campus. 

Because that was just Kuroo – Akaashi had never known him to be any other way. The very definition of all bark no bite, the kind of man that would tease you relentlessly for a stain on your pants, then take you to a store to buy you a new pair. 

Though Kuroo may have been closer to Bokuto, Akaashi had a tremendous amount of respect for the man, and would probably even go so far as to say Kuroo was also one of his closest friends. 

And when Hikari started to prove herself a new fixture, and Bokuto’s absence became more frequent, Akaashi was appreciative of Kuroo’s steady presence – still showing up to the study sessions, and coming over to watch volleyball games on Akaashi’s “much nicer TV”, and grabbing hot ramen and a cold beer after a particularly stressful test. 

He was acting as the Kuroo Tetsuro he’d always been, and it was that semblance of normalcy that Kuroo effortlessly provided, without anyone asking him to, nor any expectations from anyone else – like a lighthouse in the middle of a raging storm, Akaashi knows it was Kuroo that brought them safely to harbor. 

Because Akaashi was waiting for it. Ever since that day you had come home from your outing with Bokuto, dragging your feet through the door, looking like someone had just ripped the world out from beneath your feet, he had been waiting. For the other shoe to drop, for the inevitable descent into madness - at least your version of it. 

He felt prepared for it in a way, felt ready. He was no longer going to pretend to believe your fake smiles and reassurances that you were fine while you locked yourself in your room days at a time, and he wasn’t going to let you throw yourself so hard into your studies that you forget to eat. 

Akaashi felt things would be different this time around. He’d make sure of it. So he waited for the moment your mask would fall, and prepared himself to catch the pieces.

But the moment never came. 

Don’t misunderstand. It’s not as if Akaashi wanted to see you have a mental breakdown for the eighth time in as many years, and he certainly didn’t want to watch you retreat into a shell of yourself as you attempt to reconcile your new reality with your broken fantasies. 

Akaashi can see it in your face sometimes, even though you try your hardest to hide it. The exhaustion beneath your red-rimmed eyes, the very slight downturn of your lips when you thought no one was paying attention, and the tiredness in your slumped shoulders, as if you’ve been carrying a mountain on your shoulders. 

Still, you always made sure to take care of everybody, and you did it for so long. Akaashi didn’t want to admit to being part of the guilty party, but he had just been as willing to take everything you gave, and believed when you said you needed nothing in return. 

It was shameful, and a little bit more than selfish, but a small part of him wanted this chance. To prove himself a worthy friend, that he could take care of the people that mattered to him the most. He almost hated himself for it, for using your suffering as an opening, but he wanted to make up for all the lost opportunities, for the pain his silence might have caused. 

It was his turn to take care of you, and he was ready to do a damn good job.

Except, you were fine. 

He was thankful, if not a little thrown off by the lack of a depressive episode. But thankful, nonetheless. 

More than thankful, though, he was curious. Bokuto was becoming increasingly absent, flaking on plans and ignoring phone calls. Akaashi had never seen him be so serious about a girl, and even he was feeling annoyed about being left in the proverbial dust. Akaashi had imagined you’d be a little more… upset.

He hadn’t noticed any particular changes. Your routine hardly deviated, aside from the occasional dinners or drinks at the bar with him and Kuroo – if you were not in class you were at work, if you weren’t at work you were home, and if you weren’t home you were in class. For a short while, Akaashi felt like he had been living with a ghost, just going through the motions until the sun set and rose again for the new day. 

Sometimes, though, he’d find you on the balcony, sitting on the matching chairs Bokuto’s sisters bought for you when the two of you had first moved in. A mug of coffee or tea would be in your hands, the liquid looking as if it had long gone cold. You wouldn’t acknowledge Akaashi whenever he’d step outside to join you. Say nothing as he sits in the vacant seat beside you, staring only out into the blinking lights of the city. 

When you were this way, Akaashi knew better than to try and bother you to speak. Your mind was eons away, in a world where Akaashi had never been and would never get to see. So he settled himself to sit beside you silently, until you were ready to climb back down from wherever you wandered off to.   

But even those days became few and far in between. 

It was something that confused him, like he’d been following a trail of crumbs laid before him, yet had no idea where it would lead him to. 

That was, until he walked up to Study room 201 for the usual Tuesday evening session. On a normal day he would simply barge into the room without a thought as to who was already in there or if they were in the middle of anything important. But there was a tug in his chest that halted him in front of the narrow, rectangular window cut-out of the sliding door. He was still as he peeked through the glass, and something clicked so loudly in his brain, his eardrums nearly burst. 

Because Study Room 201 was already a mess of textbooks and papers, prohibited snacks and drinks littered the conference table, and Kuroo Tetsuro was sitting next to you. 

You were leaning over as you read something on his laptop screen, and Kuroo slightly leaned back to give you some room. Your eyes were roving over the screen quickly, faster than any normal person should be reading. Then you frowned at something, your finger pointing at certain spots as you explained his mistakes. 

It seemed like you were ripping into Kuroo’s essay or project or whatever it was he was having you read over, your mouth running off into a seemingly endless tangent of all the things he could have done differently. If it was Akaashi in that situation, his head would probably feel so hot from how irritating your voice surely would have sounded in his ears. He might have shoved you away altogether. 

Yet, there was Kuroo Tetsuro, sitting in the seat Akaashi had only ever seen one other person sit in, staring at you as he tried but failed desperately to hide the smile on his face. You turned just as Kuroo’s smile bubbled into a chuckle, and you smacked your pen so hard on his head, Akaashi was afraid he might start bleeding. 

Kuroo’s chuckle turned into complete laughter, loud and obnoxious and infectious, it was only a matter of seconds until you dissolved into a fit of giggles yourself. 

Neither of you paid him much attention when Akaashi finally decided to open the door. In fact, it seemed as if you hadn’t noticed him at all, despite nearly slamming the door in his haste to enter. Akaashi settled into the seat across from you, as he’s always done, and a small part of him wondered if Kuroo might move back into his usual seat beside him now that Akaashi has entered the picture.

He didn’t. He simply smiled at Akaashi and asked him if he’d like a turn to criticize his work. Of course, Akaashi agreed and thoroughly enjoyed tearing down Kuroo’s perfectly good thesis if only because it made both of you laugh. 

Akaashi felt incredibly stupid for not seeing it before, and now that he has, he doesn’t understand how he could have possibly missed it. He stared at the man beside you now, sneaking grapes onto your laptop to get you to eat and wordlessly walking down the hall to fill your water bottle and filling in the seat Akaashi never braved to fill, and the revelations pour over him like a waterfall, loud and rumbling and serene all at once. 

He’s glad it was Kuroo. 

It was a little painful, though. Not a heartbreak, nor a pang of jealousy, but there was an ache that took hold in his body all the same. And he hated that selfish part of him that was hurt – wishing it was him that could have helped you heal.

But it wasn’t him, and he’s glad it was Kuroo. 

Whatever sort of pain or shame or guilt that he was torturing himself with was quickly eased away by the sound of your muffled laughter through the apartment walls during late night phone calls, the color that was beginning to return to your cheeks, and the light that had finally returned in your eyes.

In those following months, you stopped locking yourself in your room, stopped losing yourself in the city lights on that cold, empty balcony. And more than once has Akaashi come home to find you and Kuroo splayed across the living room, either giggling over something playing on the TV screen with beer cans littered across his coffee table, or sitting beside each other in comfortable silence while you both worked or studied.

One way or another, Akaashi would get roped into whatever it was you were doing with Kuroo. And he’ll complain, berate you two for wasting his time on nonsense and tomfoolery, but it was those moments that provided him with a sharp clarity, like he finally has all the pieces he needed for this puzzle. 

Akaashi may have been just a man on the outside looking in, but the picture that Kuroo had built with you – for you – was more beautiful and warm than Akaashi had ever thought to imagine. And whether you realized it or not, you now went about your days with a permanent smile on your lips and a lightness in the air about you that Akaashi had not felt in years. 

It had filled him with something he didn’t even know he had been missing, as if his lungs were finally taking their first gulp of air after so long underwater. The brightness you started to exude felt as warm and refreshing as summer’s first rays of sun, and Akaashi finally lets himself relax. 

Because Kuroo – that son of a bitch, Akaashi could kiss him in the mouth – he had taken the pieces of you that were scattered across the dirty floor, and he’s put together every single shard until you were nearly whole again. He had breathed an entirely new life into you, a mosaic of all the things you thought you couldn’t handle, brought back to make you stronger. You were almost unrecognizable. 

But people don’t change so easily, and some habits are ingrained into your bones. Akaashi could already see the beginnings of it. The self-doubt, the fear, overthinking your every word and action. Often, Akaashi felt as if he could hear your thoughts from across the room, his throat constricting as they wrapped around him like a noose. 

He didn’t want things to be the same, he told himself. Things were going to be different this time. He’d said it like a mantra over and over again, and now was the time for him to put his money where his mouth was. 

And one day, Akaashi was in the kitchen making his usual cup of coffee, you came bouncing – no, literally, you were bouncing – out of your room with just about the goofiest smile he’d ever seen on your face, and it was all the push he needed to step over the line.

He allowed himself that bit of courage, something he’d spent years shoving to the back of his mind, smothered by his own hands.

“Excited for your date?”

“It’s not a date!”

“Would it be so bad if it was?I mean look at you, you’re smiling like an idiot.” 

For one, glorious, precious second, Akaashi thought that things would finally work out. The gears started spinning your head, and even though you glared at him, Akaashi could already see a sparkle in your eye, and a hint of smile you tried to hide.

“You know what, Keiji, I’m getting sick of you –”

And it only took three knocks for everything to come toppling down. 

The not-so-serendipitous entrance of Bokuto Koutaro was usually accepted with open arms, and an exasperated sigh that wasn’t actually exasperated but a little excited to see what he’s got planned for the day.

But that day, the sight of his streaked hair made Akaashi’s stomach drop to the floor, and hearing the way he spoke to you only made Akaashi see red. 

He almost didn’t register the slam of his front door, the blood roaring in his ears too loudly for him to hear your heated exchange. He couldn’t even bring himself to feel sorry for his best friend, pouting like a child whose favorite toy was just ripped from his hand. 

Akaashi knew, deep down somewhere in a dusty corner of his heart, that Bokuto didn’t mean any harm. He might have even thought he came here with the best of intentions, that maybe he was trying to be a good friend. And maybe that’s what irritates Akaashi even more, the complete lack of self-awareness, and the obliviousness to those around him – perfectly content with staying inside his own Bokuto-powered bubble. 

Irritated, yes. Still, Akaashi couldn’t bring himself to be truly vexed. Not when Bokuto looked just as confused and distraught. Akaashi didn't know what he was thinking, or perhaps he wasn’t even thinking at all, but he couldn’t stop himself. But the worst part of it was, he didn’t want to. Because you were finally letting yourself be happy, and he wasn’t going to let Bokuto ruin it. 

“She’s finally moving on. You shouldn’t do anything to mess that up.”

“Just leave it alone, Bokuto-san. Before anyone gets hurt.”

By the time he was finished, the flames of anger Akaashi felt just moments prior had completely died, and he was left with nothing but a taste of smoke and ash on his tongue. He spoke the words a lot more calmly than he felt, a familiar sense of sympathy creeping over his heart yet again.

Because the look on Bokuto’s face was one Akaashi had seen before, but never on him. A mix of shock and confusion, topped off with a hint of anguish and regret. It looked sad enough on you, but on Bokuto, it was heartbreaking.

So he truly didn’t know. Akaashi’s not sure if it made him feel better or worse. He just knew he was finished with this game, and although he couldn’t really understand the gravity of what he’d just done, he didn’t regret it. When Bokuto silently nodded and left his apartment, he felt only relief.

There was an eerie calm that settled in the wake of Bokuto’s departure. You came back from your date-not-date with Kuroo in infinitely better spirits than when you left, back to skipping around the apartment while humming a tune only you could hear, and the morning’s debacle was already long forgotten. 

Kuroo, unsurprisingly, became quite determined to attach himself to your hip, with a new sense of comfort and a different sort of tension that Akaashi didn’t feel like addressing. It seemed the encounter with Bokuto had added fuel to more than one fire, and if Kuroo was trying to hide his feelings before, he wasn’t bothering to do so now. Akaashi’s caught the way Kuroo looks at you more than once, and it’s even given him butterflies more than he cared to admit. 

Bokuto eventually apologized, and he’d even started bringing Hikari around more. She really was a sweet girl, clearly putting in the effort to get to know Bokuto’s friends. She even desperately tried to ignore Bokuto’s longing looks at a certain blossoming couple, and Akaashi wished he had the capacity to care just a little bit more about the poor girl Bokuto dragged into the tangled web of his heart. 

Alas, he was too busy preparing for the storm.

Akaashi had always been an overthinker. It’s in his nature, something inherent in him that he could never shake no matter how hard he tried. Or it could be the result of his younger days hiding behind his fear, maybe it was something he never actually got over. Akaashi doesn’t know. He doesn’t think he knows much of anything these days. 

His useless mind was only searching for ways he could have prevented this. If he pushed you about your feelings earlier, would you have ended up with Bokuto instead of Kuroo? Would it have been the two of you laughing and dancing, pouring honey in each others’ ear in a crowded room like no one was watching? 

If not for Akaashi, would Bokuto have ever even realized you were in love with him? Were it not for him, would it have eaten away at Bokuto’s very heart until he attacked his own best friend? Akaashi should have kept his mouth shut. If he did, then maybe you might have actually allowed yourself to enjoy being with Kuroo, to let him romance you in the way he’s been aching to do, to let yourself fall in the way you’ve been afraid to for so long. 

And if he did, then maybe he wouldn’t have found Bokuto’s white-knuckled fists gripping Kuroo’s shirt in the middle of a stunned crowd, drenched in sticky alcohol and hair in disarray while you were crying in the corner. Hikari wouldn’t have been sobbing in the back of a dirty taxi, fighting the bile rising in her throat from the betrayal of the one meant to love her most.

He wouldn’t have had to drag you home, too stunned into silence to fight him. He was thankful for that, because he knows that if you had seen the look on Kuroo’s face as everyone he loved left him soaked, eyes stinging, and alone… Akaashi would have deserved that punch you’d throw in his face. 

There were a plethora of things he wished he said, things he could have done. They played through his mind like an endless reel of maybes and what ifs and would haves over and over again as if determined to drive him insane.

He’s not sure what to do now. He’s not sure if he should even do anything. He was tired, he hadn't eaten in at least twenty seven hours, and when he looked in the mirror that morning, he cringed at the deep purple color that encircled his eyes. 

The coffee maker beeped loudly, and Akaashi mindlessly grabbed his mug from the cabinet. His eyes were unfocused, relying on his muscle memory to grab the oat milk creamer from the fridge and mixing in his preferred amount of sugar. 

The morning was calm, a stark contrast from the evening before, and Akaashi’s been awake for a lot longer than he’d care to admit. He stirred his spoon in circles, watching the whorls of milk blend into inky water. This was his fourth cup. Four times he’s brewed a fresh pot, hoping to have one ready for you once you step out of your room. Four times the coffee had turned cold, and he watched it swirl against the steel of his sink as he poured it down the drain. Four times he’s walked to the counter to brew a fresh pot again. 

He winced when he took a sip, coffee burning his tongue, like one last insult to his injuries. By now, he’s already used up more than half the bag of coffee beans you brought home from work just the other day. He hated being wasteful. He hated drinking more than one cup before he could even eat his breakfast. He hated waiting for you alone with nothing but the sugar granules littering his dining table to keep him company. 

He hated the silence in his apartment. He hated the 53 missed calls on his phone from Kuroo and Bokuto. He hated that he was the one who sent Bokuto into a downward spiral. He hated every single face that did nothing but gawked with their phones out while two men – who had never so much as raised their voices at each other  – looked like they were two seconds away from ripping each other's throat out.  

He hated everything.

But he would still do it all over again. Let the fire he had unknowingly started burn their slate clean. If it means peace, if it means freedom from the cage they built around themselves… then he’d do it all over again, for his friends. 

And once it grows cold, Akaashi will brew another pitcher of coffee. He will make himself another cup. 

And he will sit in this chair, and he will wait until he sees you walking out that door. 

The sun was nearing its peak when you finally woke up. 

You cursed yourself for forgetting to draw all your curtains last night, and you squinted against the harsh rays of sun now beating down on your face.

It was an effort to open your eyes. There was crust lining your waterline, stinging your lashes when you tried to flutter them open. Your lids still felt heavy and swollen, and you barely won the battle of keeping them open. 

Your head was throbbing, so loudly that it was the only thing you could hear. You dig into your temples with the heel of your palm, groaning as you positioned yourself to sit up. You run your hands along the rumpled sheets until your fingers hit something hard. You dig through a little more, closing your eyes and bracing yourself as you grab your phone. 

Dead. Only a black screen stared back, no matter how many times you pressed the buttons. You tossed the phone back on the mattress just as you flopped yourself back down, the both of you landing on the sheets like a useless brick.

You should probably charge the damn thing, but you couldn’t bring yourself to disturb the morning’s peace just yet. You doubt you’d find another moment of it the second you get out of this bed. 

Instead, you bury your fingers into your own hair, twisting your body around until your face is buried in your pillow, and you fight the urge to scream into it, too worried that the extra strain might actually cause you to hurl your guts out.  

Not yet. 

You burrowed even deeper into your sheets, wrapping the blankets around yourself until you were nothing more than a cocoon of self-preservation. Because you weren’t ready to face it. The betrayal you were unknowingly the center of, the years of friendship that was splintered in a matter of seconds, the broken hearts of the people you cherished the most. You weren’t ready to face any of it. Not yet.

As if the cowardly admission was some sort of key, memories began to flood through wide open gates in your head, soaking you all over again with sticky alcohol and salty tears. You tried to push it back, tried to cover yourself, like holding an umbrella in a hurricane. But the waves of memory overpowered you, knocking you off your feet each time you remembered Kuroo’s wide-eyed, vacant look as he watched Akaashi haul you away. 

Kuroo. 

Tetsuro.

Even a mere whisper of his name still sends shocks through your nerves, makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand straight. The thought of him consumed you so easily, so wholly, like he was a blanket of calm that smothered all your raging thoughts until there was only him. Everything about him made you so dizzy, light headed and out of breath.

Every time you hear his voice, so rich and creamy, it coats all over you like something luxurious on your skin. Forcing yourself to pretend that you’re not breathing in his scent whenever he’s near, pretend that cedar and smoke and warm amber don’t haunt your dreams – it was a tremendous effort on your part to keep yourself sane, to keep yourself from free-falling into the rabbit hole that was Kuroo Tetsuro. 

But last night… You could have dreamt all you wanted about what it would be like to have him look at you with shaky breaths and dilated pupils and ask if he could kiss you, and it still wouldn’t have amounted to anything close to actually having him in front of you. It made you want to laugh almost as much as it made you want to cry, because of course Kuroo Tetsuro could make reality surpass fantasy. 

You wished the memories could have stopped there, that your night ended with the only kiss that has ever made you feel like you were in the clouds.

But fate was almost as cruel as life. 

It was difficult to explain how it felt, for everything to finally click into place while also spiraling into confusion. 

You understood with painful clarity why Hikari hated you, why she acted like you were a pebble in her shoe, and looked at you as if your very existence was an eyesore. You remembered that fight with Bokuto, and the tension that never went away even after the two of you reconciled – all the times Bokuto’s mood would plummet at the mere mention Kuroo, each time you ignored the frustrated glances he threw towards the both of you, hoping you were simply imagining things.

Because what reason could Bokuto possibly have to act that way? You thought about it over and over, and could never come up with an adequate conclusion. 

Now, your willful ignorance has finally come to pay its retribution, a sort of cosmic joke that you were sure some powers above found absolutely hilarious – because Bokuto Kotaro was in love with you. In love. With you. Has been, apparently, for … you didn’t even want to think of how long, couldn’t comprehend the implication of his confession.

A confession that you vividly remember praying for, words that your heart has longed for and ached to hear. Cried for in the silent void of your bedroom, hoped for in your fractured soul, because for so long, you waited, even just for a sliver for a chance for Bokuto to actually see you as more than a friend, more than just the overbearing manager who followed him to college. 

It almost kills you to know that he was waiting for the same thing. 

For a moment, you envisioned it. The life you could have had with Bokuto – walking around campus tucked beneath his arm, registering for classes that fit each other’s schedule, wearing his jersey when you watch his games. Maybe you would have joined the team as a manager, and there wouldn’t have been a second you wouldn’t spend together. Bokuto probably wouldn’t have even waited for the first year to end before convincing you to move in with him. The apartment would have been small, but he wouldn’t ever miss a single dinner together. 

Every morning, you’d wake up to an empty bedroom, but by the time you prepared two steaming mugs of coffee, Bokuto would have already returned from his morning run. He’d kiss you and embrace you, and you’d get ready for the day together, leave your home together, and come home together.

Grief is peppered through every thought like weeds, mourning for the time lost and each memory that never happened. It would have been a beautiful life together. It would have been filled with love, laughter, and happiness so bright, just imagining it made your eyes burn. 

The smell of fresh coffee permeated through the musty, stale air of your bedroom. You could almost see the trail of the scent wafting through the open seams of your door, snaking through the smog until it wrapped around you like a warm embrace. It beckoned you like a familiar friend, so enticing that it actually spurred you to sit back up. 

Suddenly, you felt your stomach grumble and the dryness in your mouth felt like ash, as if the smell of arabica beans was that first fallen domino that had all your issues tumbling into each other. You ignored the rush of nausea churning in your stomach that had nothing to do with the amount of alcohol you drank last night, and swung your legs over the side of your bed, feet absently shuffling against the wooden floor until they found your slippers. 

You stifled a groan as you stood, and dragged your feet across the room slowly. You snatched the thin robe you kept hung over your computer chair, and wrapped it tightly around your body, taking a deep breath as you closed your fingers around the door knob and twisted it open. 

You nearly choked on the wave of aroma that rushed at you so fast, you might have thought you were stepping into an actual roastery instead of your own living room. You half expected to see Akaashi standing over a heated pan, vigorously stirring beans until they turned brown – or however the hell one would roast coffee, you seriously had no idea. 

Instead, you found him standing in front of the coffee maker you bought for him two Christmases ago, hands on his hips and foot tapping on the floor. The machine was bubbling and hissing as the coffee dripped slowly into the pot, and the counter was an abhorrent mess that you’ve quite literally never seen Akaashi make in the entire time you’ve lived with him. 

“Did you open up some sort of… cafe in our apartment that I wasn’t aware of,” You tried to keep your voice light and playful, but the words scratched at your throat, and they came out sounding tired and rough.

Akaashi could have broken his neck with the speed he turned around, shooting an arm out to catch himself on the counter when his momentum threatened to hurtle his body too far. He regarded you with wide, tired eyes, coffee staining his shirt in four different places, and you had a strange feeling that if you reached up and tried to run your fingers through his hair, you would find a bird’s egg nestled somewhere deep within. He looked – and you were putting this nicely – like absolute shit. 

You tried to smile, and his gaze immediately softened, lips coming together into a tight line. And you regretted any previous thoughts you might have had about the malnourished vibe he was putting down., because the pathetic way he looked at you definitely said that you looked about a million times worse. 

“I thought I’d give it a try,” he said softly, crossing his arms as he leaned against the counter, “It can’t be that hard, can it? Especially with an experienced barista in the vicinity.”

You clicked your tongue, and gave Akaashi a mocking glare, “You wouldn’t be able to afford my skills and services.”

Akaashi brought a finger up to his lip in faux-thought, and you felt your heart flutter when he opened his arms wide, “I can pay with warm, comforting, and gentle embraces?”

You shook your head, and your slippers slapped against the wooden floor as you hurriedly made your way across the room and crashed into Akaashi’s arms.

“Can’t you be normal and just call it a hug?” Your voice was muffled against his chest, “Who the hell calls it an embrace these days?”

He pulled you against him even tighter, “Literary geniuses, that’s who.”

A chuckle softly escaped from your lips and vibrated against Akaashi’s chest, and it felt like a tether had been snapped. Even more giggles tumbled out, and the fact that Akaashi was not laughing somehow made it even more funnier – made what funnier, you actually had no idea, though at this point you could hear how unhinged your laughter actually sounded. But you couldn’t hold it back, and you laughed until your belly ached, and tears formed on the corners of your eyes. 

You laughed until the laughter felt like acid burning up your throat, and the tightness of it made it difficult to breathe. The tears that pooled in your eyes now flowed freely down your cheeks, and there was no stopping it then, not when you choked out a sob, clutched at the fabric of Akaashi’s shirt and cried. While Akaashi rested one hand on the back of your head, and stroked small circles around your back with the other, you wept and you cried. Cried and cried and cried. 

Whatever restraint you’d been keeping against your heart was undone by the strength of Akaashi’s arms around you, and knowing that he was there to hold you together… it was enough to have you falling apart.

You don’t know how long the two of you stood in that kitchen for. It could have been a few minutes. It could have been a few hours. Akaashi didn’t falter, didn’t move a single inch. Through each shuddering sob, every heaving gasp for air, Akaashi had stayed. He waited until the shaking subsided, and your breathing evened out, and there was not a single tear left to cry. 

You weren’t sure how much time had passed before you peeled yourself away from his embrace, wiping your entire face with the sleeve of your robe. You backed another step, and Akaashi met your swollen, red eyes with his own sunken, tired ones. He tried to smile at you, and tried extremely hard to seem like he wasn’t uncomfortable in his soaked shirt.

“Go change out of that thing,” you said by way of apology, cringing at the mess you’d left behind, “Please.”

For a second, you thought Akaashi might have argued with you. But then his eyes switched from you to the hallway then back again, before he nodded and darted to the direction of his bedroom. You breathed out a laugh and walked to the counter, grabbing a towel from beside the sink and wiping away the coffee grounds that dirtied your usually-immaculate kitchen. 

You were sweeping up the stray flecks that littered the floor when Akaashi came barrelling back into the kitchen. Before he said a single word, he snatched the broom violently from your hand.

“Hey, I was –”

You couldn’t finish your sentence, not when Akaashi practically shoves you into a seat at the dining table. 

“Stay,” he pointed a finger at you, and you quickly swallowed back the snarky comment you were prepared to throw out. Your eyes just silently followed Akaashi as he fussed around the kitchen, mopping the rest of the floor and shaking his head at you when he realized you’d already cleaned the counters. 

He grabbed your favorite mug – drying on the dish rack like it had just been washed after use – then turned to make you a cup of coffee. But when he touched the top of his fingers to the glass body of the pitcher, he frowned. Deeply. 

“What’s wrong?” you asked.

“The coffee got cold again,” he grumbled, making you shoot out of your seat and scramble towards him when he yanked the decanter off the hot plate and headed to the sink.

“Stop!” you practically screeched, just barely making it in time to grip his wrist before he could fully pour the contents down the drain. “What the hell are you doing?” 

Akaashi just stared. “It’s cold now.”

“So?!” you looked at him like the roles have now been completely reversed, “We can just microwave it or something. You don’t need to throw the whole thing out.” You tried to pry the pitcher out of Akaashi’s hand, but he clutched on tightly.

“I wanted you to have fresh coffee,” he said simply, and you gaped. You looked at him for a second longer before your eyes flick back to the counter that you just cleaned up, and realization washed over you like a gentle shower. 

“Did you –�� you paused for a second, unsure of how you were going to deal with this situation, “Have you been making a new pot of coffee each time it went cold?” 

Akaashi opened his mouth as if to speak, but quickly clamped his lips down to press them into a thin line. You managed to grab the pitcher from Akaashi with no resistance, and rushed to place it back into its proper place on the machine. In your peripherals, you could see a crinkled bag, folded in half and tucked in a corner behind the coffee maker. 

“Is that…” you mumbled to yourself before quickly snatching the nearly empty bag from its hiding place, “Keiji!”

He winced slightly when you presented him with the evidence, coffee beans flying astray when you shake the bag in Akaashi’s face.

“I just got this bag, Keiji!” you groaned, lamenting the gallons of your favorite roast undoubtedly swirling through the drainpipes of Tokyo by now. You peeked into the bag, frowning when you saw that only about a fourth of the bag had been saved, “Now I have to wait until next month for the cafe to give me a free one.”

“I wanted you to have –”

“Fresh coffee. I got it,”  you sighed, placing two hands on each of Akaashi’s shoulders. Again, he showed no resistance when  you pushed him backwards and sat him on your empty chair. He opened his mouth to argue when you grabbed two mugs and poured in the cold coffee, but the glare you shot him was enough to make him shut it. You ignored his searing gaze as it trailed after your every movement, ignored it burning holes in your back while you microwaved the two mugs of coffee, ignored the burn in your throat at the pathetic way he watched you place one mug in front of him, and held the other as you took the empty seat across from him.

You gestured silently to the mug of coffee.

“Drink,” you ordered, and the word made Akaashi instantly grab the handle, “There’s only room for one mental breakdown in this apartment at a time. And I call dibs for today, okay?”

Akaashi couldn’t stop the laughter that broke free, and you couldn’t help but smile at the exasperated way he shook his head. When the two of you lifted your mugs, your eyes met for just a moment, and the smile you shared with your best friend might have been enough to heal your heart. 

Then, you took a sip of the coffee, and the moment the dark liquid hit your tongue, you had to fight the cringe, and pretend that the way he burnt this batch didn’t break your heart all over again.

“That’s…” you begin, searching for the words. You coughed instead of finishing your sentence.

Akaashi simply sighed. He reached a hand in his pocket, and pulled out his phone.

“What are you doing?” you asked, watching him slowly slide his fingers up and down the screen. 

He gives you a pointed look. “What’s it look like? I’m getting breakfast delivered.”

The sun looked just about ready to set by the time you and Akaashi decided to settle down. Empty take out boxes were piled in the proper compartments of the trash bin, and neither of you have bothered to clean up the crumbs all over the table. 

Breakfast had passed by silently, the both of you just content to be in each other’s presence, still sniffling as you shoved entire forkfuls of souffle pancakes from your favorite bakery. You shrieked with delight when you recognized the logo on the bag Akaashi retrieved from the delivery man. You didn’t even scold him for the insane delivery fee he probably had to pay for them to bring it all the way here. 

You just crushed him in a tight hug and accepted his kindness with a kiss on the cheek. He sighed in the way you imagined an older brother would about his annoying little sister, despite you being an entire year older. It made you chuckle, especially when he let you break his very strict “no eating in the living room” rule. 

If Akaashi had any questions or concerns about the events that transpired last night, he mercifully kept them all to himself. After breakfast, he dug out the kotatsu blanket from the storage closet, and – after screeching to Akaashi that he was banned from making any beverages for at least a month – you brewed some of his favorite green tea.

You laid under that kotatsu with Akaashi for hours, sipping on tea that had long turned lukewarm, talking about things that were of neither importance or relevance. You wasted away the entire day, it seemed, if the setting sun and ombre skies out the windows were of any indication. 

Akaashi sat across from you, his back leaning against the foot of the couch. The kotatsu blanket reached up to his waist, and his head lolled lazily to the side as he scrolled mindlessly through his phone. You’d long thrown propriety out the window, though it never is in the room when you’re with Akaashi. You managed to snuggle yourself completely under the kotatsu table, the blanket skirt covering your body while using your seat cushion as a pillow. 

Akaashi had gone through tremendous effort to make this day feel as casual as last week’s Sunday morning. You had a niggling feeling that if you let him, then Akaashi would be very content in keeping you inside this bubble of safety and comfort that he’s curated specifically for you. He’d keep the problems that were waiting past these four walls at bay for as long as he possibly could. This, you knew without a shred of doubt. 

It was a kindness that you held closely to your heart. One that you knew was the type of kindness that didn’t boast, but wrapped itself around you gently and held you against its chest. The longer you looked at Akaashi, rubbing his finger against his nose and eyes glued to the screen, the more your heart swelled with that affection he generously poured into your cup. 

And you knew that because he’s loved you enough to create this bubble, you had to love him enough to pop yourself both out of it. 

“Keiji,” your voice felt hoarse from the silence, the words scratching at your throat, “Was I really that blind?”

Akaashi stilled almost imperceptibly, if you hadn’t known him for years, you probably would have missed it. He clicks the button on the side of his phone, and he gently places the black device on the table. He shuffles to move his seat cushion from beneath him and tosses it to the side, settling himself beneath the blanket before laying down to face you. 

“You weren’t blind, y/n.”

He said it so gently, probably worried that if he spoke any louder, then you would shatter. It softens your heart as much as it sends a spike of irritation through you.

“Dumb, then? Oblivious? Stupid? Naive? Either way you spin it, it still comes down to my faults, my…” your voice cracks, the traitorous thing, and you stopped to clear your throat, “What word would you use, then, Keiji?”

“Young. Afraid. Hurt,” He says with a lot more force and clarity than you expected, each word striking directly into your heart, “A whole lot of other words before stupid, actually. An entire dictionary’s worth.”

You wanted to wipe that look off his face, really. Eyes misting his usual blue to a foggy gray, and failing to stop his wretched mouth from quivering. How many more people in your life were you going to hurt? You felt pathetic.

You stay silent for a moment before starting, “Bokuto… he must have also been in a lot of pain,” you sighed, turning to supine and training your eyes to the popcorned ceiling, “Everything’s so… fucked up. And it’s all because of me and my stupid ignorance and –”

“Please, stop saying that,” Akaashi groaned loudly, balling a fist into his own hair. 

Exasperation floods through you like a tidal wave, it crashes through you viciously and your body shoots itself up into a sitting position before you could even think. You couldn’t hold back the glare at Akaashi before asking him with a bite, “Well, what do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know,” Akaashi answers with a growl, maneuvering himself up to face you, his fists landing helplessly on the table, “but please, stop saying stuff like that, not when–” Akaashi sighed, bring two fingers up to pinch the bridge of his nose, “I knew about everything for… a long time.”

You shrugged carelessly as you replied, “Well, yeah. I know I never actually told you, but I thought you figured it out after… the equipment room incident.”

Akaashi pursed his lips together. “Oh, I did. But I wasn’t talking about just you.”

Your eyebrows lifted, opting to stay silent. Akaashi nibbled at his bottom lip in hesitancy, allowing him the time to process through whatever he clearly wanted to say. You brace yourself when you see him taking a slow, deep breath.

“With you, it was… so fucking obvious. And it wasn’t just because you followed him around, or laughed obnoxiously loud at his dumb jokes. If anybody looked at you for longer than five seconds, they’d see it on your face – clear as day. You looked at him like… I don’t know. Like he made all the flowers bloom, or painted the sunset with your favorite colors or something poetic like that.”

“That sounded pretty poetic to me,” you laugh, though it sounded hollow and despondent in its attempt to hide the gut punch Akaashi’s words delivered. Akaashi smiled ruefully, but he continued. 

“My point is – you never had to tell me. I knew it. You knew it. We all knew it. Your feelings were never the big secret you thought it was. Bokuto might have been the only person in this world that never picked up on it. And actually, there was a point in time when I genuinely thought he was ignoring them on purpose. Fuck, maybe he did. I never really figured it out. I don’t really think he ever did either. Because with Bokuto…”

Akaashi took the deep breath you’ve been holding the entire time he spoke, and he looked directly at you this time as he spoke.

“I knew he loved you. He loved you, maybe a bit more than he knew what to do with. God, if you only saw how he’d glare at any guy that tried to even look at you. They were ridiculous – hilariously vicious. He always did it behind your back, but it was about as subtle as a flashing neon sign. I don’t know how you never caught him.You followed him around, sure, but he made sure he kept you by his side, never letting you stray too far from him. Because if you weren’t next to him, then he was… lost. It’s stupid but– yeah, I think I knew he loved you, even before he knew it himself. And I could have told him. Should have told him. It would have been easy, quick – ‘Bokuto, Y/N is in love with you’. And he would have gone running. Well, nevermind. It might have taken him a couple days, but when it hit him… I don’t think anything in the world could have stopped him.”

Silver streaks on Akaashi’s face matched the warm tears that trickled down your own, and you tried to catch his gaze but at this point, he stared fixedly down at his lap. 

“Keiji…” you called out to him, somehow wrangling his name through the tightness of your throat, because you need him to look at you. Needed him to see that you didn’t blame him, would never even think to. But he doesn’t meet your eyes. Instead, he barrels on. 

“But I didn’t. Obviously. I kept my mouth shut, and just watched you two bumble around like idiots. It was, believe it or not, torturous for me. For the longest time, I kept my nose out of your business, because I know what it’s like to… Ahh,” He bows his head, and covers his eyes with the palm of his hand. It took a moment before he wiped his hand away and continued, “I did try once, though. With you. And I felt so completely iced out afterwards, I remembered exactly why I kept out of it for so long.”

He must have sensed the rebuttal at the tip of your tongue, but he interrupts you before you could even start.

“I’m not telling you this to make you feel guilty. I’m telling you this because… I was afraid too. I was scared that if I had kept pushing, then you would have pulled away from me completely. I was scared that Bokuto would think I was overstepping my boundaries. I was scared that it would work out, and the two of you would phase me out of your lives. I was scared it wouldn’t work out, and everything would be…”

His voice trailed off, so you softly finished for him, “Fucked up?”

He finally, finally looked at you then. You reached across the table and held his hand in yours. You felt him stiffen for a second before turning his hand and curling his own fingers around yours. A giggle of relief spills from your lips, and it elicits a chuckle from Akaashi, and the sound blooms within you.

“You guys are my best friends,” Akaashi said, his grip on you tightening just a fraction, “And I saw what you were putting each other through. I was watching it all happen in front of my own eyes. I should have done something more, right? If I had tried harder with you, if I just talked to Bokuto, if I bothered even just a little bit more to get over my shit and helped my friends…  Then this never would have happened. And Kuroo… God, Kuroo. He didn’t need me to do a damn thing, he just loved you but still I managed to fuck things up for him and –”

“Shut up!”

Akaashi started a little at your sudden outburst, but it achieved the desired effect. He blinked at you once, then twice. You almost felt a twinge of guilt at your lack of patience, considering all that Akaashi was beginning to unpack in front of you. But weren’t you the one that called dibs on the mental breakdown today? If he thought you were just going to sit there and listen to his blasphemy, then he’s sorely mistaken.

“Don’t you even try to blame any of it on yourself, Keiji,” you spat out, irritated, “How could you even say something so convoluted? How could you even think such a –”

“It’s true, isn’t it?” Akaashi interrupts you fervently, as if desperate to get you to listen to him, “I let my fears hold me back, instead of facing it for the people that mattered to me. I’m just a coward.”

“No, Keiji. You’re not a coward. You…” You let out a heavy breath, all the sharpness in your tone now softening at Akaashi’s deep set frown, “Do you even have any idea how much you saved me? Even though things were… unspoken between us, I knew you understood me. Without me ever having to say a single word, you understood me. And you never judged me or tried to tell me I was wrong. You just… you just held my hand. No matter what happened, good or bad, if I looked to my side, I knew I would see you there. Do you think you’re the only person that notices the little things? I felt your support, and I felt your love. Even when you didn’t say it out loud.”

“But–”

“No more buts, I really don’t want to hear it. You weren’t the one responsible for us,” your eyes were hard, providing no room for arguments, “You were just a kid. What could you have even done? You saw how stubborn I was being! Do you really think I would have listened? You were young, and afraid, and didn’t know any –”

Too late. The words flew out of your mouth quickly, you didn’t even think twice about it. Your guard was down, and you knew that was the most dangerous thing around Akaashi Keiji. Because too slowly did you realize the trap he laid out in front of you. And as the words slipped past your lips, you realized you were already too late. Akaashi was already looking at you with that smug grin.

“It’s not the same, and you know it.”

“No, it’s not,” He chuckled at you as if you weren’t staring daggers at his soul right now, “But if you can afford me that much grace, then I think you owe the same to yourself. Everyone makes mistakes. You won’t meet a single person that doesn’t have any regrets. But you can’t let those feelings define you. Only improve you. I know you’re feeling… a lot of shit right now that I probably can’t even begin to process. But it’s what you do with those feelings that matter.” He propped an elbow on the table, and rested his chin in the palm of his halls. “Are you gonna let it keep you down?”

You felt a little stunned, and though Akaashi’s words were simple, you could feel them find their mark. Hot tears pricked at the corner of your eyes yet again, and you didn’t look away from Akaashi as you let them fall. Still, you crossed your arms indignantly and pouted. “I can’t help but feel like I fell for some dirty trick.”

Akaashi laughed this time, waving his hand to beckon you closer to him. You begrudgingly moved from your spot, ignoring the ache in all your joints from your lack of movement, and crawled to sit beside Akaashi. He lifted the kotatsu skirt for you to settle under before wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “Dirty trick or not, as long as it gets the point across.”

“I understand, Keiji. I do, but still,” you sighed, leaning your head against his shoulder, “It’s difficult not to feel foolish.”

“I know,” Akaashi said as he laid his cheek against your crown, “I know. Fools in love, right?”

You didn’t know what to say, so you chose not to say anything. The lull in conversation allowed you the time to process his words, closing your eyes to feel everything you’d been avoiding the entire day. With a deep inhale, and a slow exhale, you silently search for the strength to let it all go. 

A buzz on the table catches your attention. Akaashi makes a point to ignore the notification, even more so when it buzzes again. 

The sight of his phone only served to remind you of your own, sitting dead and silent somewhere in the corner of your room for the entire day, of the calls that went straight to voicemail, of the messages that are unanswered – of the two men on the other side of line, waiting to see which way their world is about turn. 

“Have you heard from…” 

Akaashi lets out a snort through his nose. “Oh, yes, I have. I’m probably dead for ignoring all the calls and texts. But I needed to make sure you were alright before I answered anything.”

You chuckle, moving out of Akaashi’s one-armed embrace and sitting up to face him fully. “I love you, Keiji. I’d pick you if you were in love with me too, you know. What do you say? Wanna throw a towel in the ring?”

Akaashi laughed, loud and brash and genuine, and for the first time that day, you actually believed that everything will be alright. “I love you too, y/n. But I’d rather die.”

You nudged him hard with your elbow before standing up, leaving Akaashi to rub the sore spot while you stretched out your sore limbs. “I guess it’s time to stop hiding now, right?”

“Yeah…” Akaashi trails off, and you wait for him to ask the question you could see had been brewing in his mind for hours, “What are you gonna do?”

The question shoots a pang of loneliness through you. Because no matter what decision you make, everything will change. Your friendships will not walk away unscathed, and there will never be going back to the way things were. This was irrefutable, and that thought alone should terrify you, should make you want to scramble back on your knees and beg the gods to turn back time. Yet, it doesn’t. 

No, instead you’re filled with a sense of clarity that you’re not sure you’ve ever felt before. It pained you to know that you’ll hurt the people that matter to you the most, but not as much as it would pain you to know that you weren’t being true to yourself. 

It was time for you to choose your own happiness.

“Nothing’s changed for me, Keiji. I’ve always known what I was gonna do. Whether this truth came out or stayed hidden forever… my answer is going to be the same.” You smiled sadly as you spoke to Akaashi, and he offered nothing but an understanding nod, “From now on, for me, it’s always going to be him.”

✧: @kawaii-angelanne @boosyboo9206 @theglitterypages @rntrsuna @vinsmouke @chi-anpan @jinadamsel @kowalsqq @arcorjoan @galaxyfloater3

prev ✧next

[uzuikyo]

random texts/posts with boyfriend!kuroo & his teammates

kuroo tetsuro x f!reader

established relationship, profanities

👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾

👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾👾��👾

© uzuikyo. all rights reserved.

[tetsunova]

you don’t don’t know when you fell for him.

maybe it was the time when he surprised you, as you walked through the door. he danced around by himself to ‘fly me to the moon’ playing on the vinyl and didn’t stop when he took notice of you. instead he danced his way to you with the warmest smile you’ve seen on his face and offered you his hand. maybe it was that look of love in his eyes when you both danced that made you fall deep, and fall fast.

or maybe it was when he suddenly stopped talking about his day when he noticed how vigilantly you were listening. when you wondered why he kissed and called you beautiful; and that dammed pretty smile of his followed after which he continued talking about his day. maybe that fluttering in your stomach was a sign that your heart knew.

it could’ve also been the first time you woke up next to him in bed as he lay there stomach down and half of his back was covered by the sheets. the way the sun shimmered on the honey kissed skin made him look so handsome you could melt. he was at peace, and that was rare. with all the school work, he was stressed although he didn’t show it. but that’s the beauty of kuroo tetsuro.

as absurd as it is, the possibility of falling because of his stupid chemistry puns can’t be ruled out. regardless of one being worse than the other, you realised you wouldn’t mind listening to them for the next two years, or five, or maybe the rest of your life.

and, let’s be honest, who can resist that flat ass and thick thighs??? i mean have you seen how *censored*

of course there’s arguments, no relationships perfect it’s really surprising to you how he handles it calmly and apologises when he knows he’s wrong. he’s had his fair share of failed past relationships, specifically his family so he learnt from them, which is so so admirable. maybe that’s why you can’t stay mad at him for too long, he always makes it up to you.

but most of all, does it really matter? he’s yours. yours to call a best friend, yours to call a partner, (and a roaster too at times) and he’s yours to call home. no body else’s. you get to see him at his best and you get to see him at his worst- be there for him just as he is there for you. he’d stay up for you till 3 am to help you out for the test the next day, he’d make you soup if you were sick, get you chocolate if you were having a bad day and every goofy charming thing that makes kuroo tersuro, kuroo tetsuro.

tags: @ri-days @just-that-bi-girl @bokubear @yatsurinamikaze @sakusaww @mxtchalilies @meromelo @rinslove @suckerforsugawara @rae-main @passionateuchiha

masterlist