#being like 😭😭😭😭 GOD DAMN IT JOHN
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This is just always so funny to me
#the way flans is like we were free to do it because we didnt have any PESKY roommates to worry about telling us NO....#whole time the roommate was just linnell.#seriously though flans was insane for this#i love the image of linnell trying to desperately to reach him by dialing their own fucking song service and being unable to get through an#being like 😭😭😭😭 GOD DAMN IT JOHN#and its like what if like. his parents wanted to call him#but you know what it really was so worth it he was literally so right#i stand with him. i understand why he was soooo excited and couldnt wait to do it and dgaf if it literally made him unreachable#tp
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#have been an anxious lil piece of shit since my mother walked past/then in my room bc she smelled something-#this was yesterday btw .. first thing she said was 'u dont vape do u?' and i was like 'no' *queue john mulaney voice: like a liar*#ok well technically only on occasion like if i dont have w**d#anyway she steps into my room and starts fuckin sniffing around and goes 'it smells like .. weed 😐' and just looked at me and guys ..#i am the WORST but my mothers brother aka my gay uncle got kicked out when they were younger bc he smoked too and my mother has grown to#not be fond of it since . so BASICALLY i lightly gaslit her and was like 'mom. seriously ? 🙄'#bc we joke about it on occasion like she went to denver and came back with a fuckin pot that says 'a little pot from colorado' meant for#weed and in my head im like 😭 bro i could actually use this 😭#so thats how we joke but obviously for me its genuinely funny bc of the irony but anyway .#my anxiety was so high after that bc i literally had my pen on me and i just left the situation and started petting my dog and filled up my#waterbottle trying to think of what the fuck i was going to do next but that was literally the end of that#(at least for now but i dont even want to jinx it)#to be proactive tho bc newsflash i do smoke! i got smart as shit and wrapped my smell proof combo bag to make it look like a gift for my#my friends when i go back to school so she wont think anything of it#and then put my pen old battery and vape in a box hidden away so i can still access them if i need but god DAMN#i was def just being stupid tho bc i forget when im at home i cant be so lax and rip the shit out of my pen with my door closed and no fan#anymore like 😐 u dumb fuck i was smarter at 16 with this shit#anyway. its definitely on me and im just mad at myself for it and hope it doesnt come up again/that she isnt overly paranoid with me like i#am with myself rn#also just for some more background my mom and i have never been super close but im really close with my dad but i love with my mom ? so#after this semester not just bc of this situation but i might be like. ive never had a room at dads and id like to at least for summer#and go from there. they just moved and its so cozy and id love to make my room mine over there for once even if it means moving in for abit#but the one thing that would absolutely break my heart is that my dog lives with my mom and its not like i couldnt still see her but i feel#like id feel guilty/like im abandoning her or something :'(#idk if anyone read this far pls lmk ur thoughts#oh and i work right by my moms so its not like i couldnt still visit her but it would break my heart#kylas thoughts#drugs /
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Imagine slapping their asses 🙏🙏
•Dutch; immediately pissed off, depends on who slapped his ass, he might push his cigar into their arm or something out of anger. Will grumble if it's his partner and shoo them away, smokes enough cigarettes after that to take away ten years on his life (it definitely made a camp deafening sound when they slapped it)
•Arthur; the most shocked face ever, just has to stand there for a minute to figure out whatever the fuck just happened. Will stumble over his words, before glaring at the person and chest bump them a few times, but secretly he's nearly popping a boner 💔💔
•John; eye twitches, trying to hold back grabbing his revolver and threatening the person. Says something sarcastic and crosses his arms like the dumb child he is. Will definitely be so damn embarrassed that he flushes as red as Sean's hair. Definitely blabs about it to Abigail later and gets huffy when she laughs
•Hosea; jumps a foot in the air and his body bends like a banana 😭 he's not mad, he'd never get mad, but he is a bit embarrassed about that. He sighs softly, tells a little story about his youth and how he would be able to handle it when he was younger as he rubbed his sore ass, then says he's too old for all that 🫶🫶
•Javier; yells out the loudest Spanish he's ever said, nearly falls forward from the shock of it as both hands go to cover his ass. Can't see it since he pulls his poncho up over his entire face, but he is burning bright red and thinking about it for the rest of the month. Will never trust being around the person again, will side eye them and cover his ass with anything if he's around them again 😢
•Bill; Two different ways this could go. One, he's drunk as a bitch and he hurls a beer bottle them and starts cursing and chasing them all over yelling about how he's no queer, even if it was a woman that slapped his ass, or he will just glare and threaten them a little bit and try to intimidate them if by god he's not drunk
•Kieran; actually stands up straight for once instead of being like a shrimp literally 24/7. Looks like a bug when you pick up a rock, eyes all wide and face flushed even pinker than it usually already naturally is. Definitely looks spaced out the rest of the day, probably can't stop thinking about it for sure
•Sean; gasps and is completely over dramatic, falling and pulling whoever slapped his ass down with him. Definitely tells everyone that the person slapped his ass, and he sounds strangely proud about it too..
•Lenny; poor boy doesn't know what to do, he's stuttering and gripping at his favorite book that he was reading, glancing around as he tried to say something. Might quirk a smile after a while, but it's whenever that person isn't around (he's so embarrassed don't do it again he can't handle it 💔)
•Micah; immediately cracks up and dares the person to slap his ass again, sticking it out slightly. He then promptly slaps that person's ass twenty times harder than they slapped his. It becomes a little game between the two whenever they see each other
•Charles; the absolute politest, might get a bit grumbly. 'oh my' is the first words outta his mouth 😭 will ask them why they did that and if it was supposed to be funny. He's like a mother in this sense, but also can't stop grinning since he actually liked it ❤️
#headcannons#rdr2#rdr#rdr1#red dead redemption two#red dead redemption 2#arthur morgan#arthur morgan x male reader#male reader#smut#kieran red dead redemption#kieran rdr2#rdr kieran#kieran duffy x reader#kieran duffy#charles smith#arthur morgan x reader#red dead redemption arthur#hosea matthews#dutch van der linde x reader#micah bell#rdr2 micah#bill williamson#bill williamson x reader#john marston x reader#john marston#lenny summers#sean macguire#javier escuella smut#javier escuella headcanons
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Any version of Soap in any position of power would be soooo disgusting, calling IT Security reader at all times of the day and telling her that the speaker on his computer doesn’t work, while he’s clearly streaming some porno in the background 😭😭😭
You get it Lumi, he's a sick freak :) You also sent this while I happen to be working through 1k requests so bonus short for you <3
Back Chat
Words: 1k
CWs: non-con groping, just all around gross awful Soap
Sergeant John MacTavish was the reason you had poured over your contract for any get out clause that didn't cost you a fortune. You came up with nothing. The military had paid for a high end training course for you on the provision that if you left the role within 2 years then you had to pay every penny back.
Plus this job paid well and the benefits were great. You didn't even mind having gruff military personnel seeing fit to give you a bollocking over the phone because you would be following procedure whether they liked it or not and they could file a damn ticket if they wanted their issue looked at. Generally they were an OK bunch at heart, but rough around the edges and used to recruits eager to please them. When they realised your lack of any rank also excused you from being ordered around by anyone but your actual boss they usually mellowed out.
Of course you had made the mistake of chewing out one such gruff man after he called in a temper demanding that his laptop be fixed as a priority. Not even his work laptop, no he wanted his personal laptop fixed.
“Look MacTavish was it?”
“Sergeant MacTavish tae you.”
“No it isn't. I am not one of your soldiers. I work in IT for the military, your laptop is not military property so I'm not touching it. Use your big boy Sergeant wage and buy a new one.”
“Listen here ye wee bitch-”
You hung up on him and got on with your day right up until he physically showed up at your office on base. You handled IT for multiple bases, you had not considered that the person you had chewed out would actually work on this one. Oops.
He was a big motherfucker as well. Handsome. Crazy scary dog energy. Definitely not your usual soldier with his lack of uniform (unless jeans and a t-shirt that was so tight he was liable to tear out of it was uniform these days) and out of regulation haircut. You scrambled to try and stand but he was already looming over you in your chair, leaving you no space to do so as he settled his hands on the armrests and leaned over you to get into your face.
“I'll need tae settle for you then hen. Better make it good.”
“Excuse me?”
“The lassie on my laptop begs tae get it up the arse. Is a good girl for a thick cock pounding her tight cunt. Even when she's fucked oot her nut and ruined she still gags around a man down her throat and swallows like a proper bitch.”
You were flooded with fear and arousal. Nobody had ever spoken to you like that and you weren't entirely sure he was joking. He wouldn't actually do anything to you right? He was just being a dick because he wanted his laptop fixed. Just trying to intimidate you.
“And I bet she gets paid a lot more than me MacTavish, back off.”
Oh no. There was a feral gleam in his eye and a rabid grin that showed those sharp incisors. He clearly relished your response.
“Then I'll need to buy ye with, what was it? Right. My big boy Sergeant wage.”
He leaned in close and took a deep breath. Christ he was sniffing your currently greasy and messy hair. You hadn't showered in like 2 days, you were fucking IT, it wasn't like people usually came to physically see you in your little den.
“...I'll fix your fucking laptop oh my God just bring it by.”
“Atta girl” he all but panted into your ear before tugging at the lobe with his teeth and then fully tounging at your ear hole.
The sensation was truly the most awful thing you had ever felt. Your skin crawled and your body shivered uncomfortably as you tried to push him away from you. He chuckled and you choked on your own saliva as he firmly smacked your pussy before pulling away.
“I'll bring it right doon.”
You were left completely gobsmacked in your little office, your body hopped up on adrenaline and your cunt throbbing from the spank it had gotten and from the sick part of your mind that found the whole thing depraved and disgusting but sort of titillating.
When he brought the laptop back he hovered behind you while you worked on it, making you sweat. It was an easy enough fix and you sighed in relief and carefully avoided eye contact when you told him it was fixed.
“Ye’ll check it over, cannae be sending me away with a half done job.”
“You can see that it's working.”
He leant over, arms surrounding you so he could scroll over to open a video file. It was of a woman being railed hard from behind, drooling into the pillow and babbling for more. The wet squelch was disgusting, the man spitting down on her and smacking her already red ass.
“Speakers are fucked.”
You squirmed in your seat.
“I can hear it just fine.”
“Aye? What are ye hearing then?”
You remained silent, eyes fixed on the wall instead of on the screen. At least you were silent until he drew a yelp from you by groping one of your tits.
“Told ye, if ye cannae prove that it's fixed I'll need to settle for you. Bit shorter, softer and dirtier than my lassie mind, so got tae give it yer full effort.”
“I-It's working!”
“Prove it, what ye hearing?”
He made you replicate the whole script from each broken moan to the begging to the degrading. He was only satisfied when the whole video had run its course, by which time he had a hand on either tit, rough with how he groped and tugged.
“See now? Wisnae so hard to follow a Sergeant's orders was it?”
“No” you mumbled, crying out when he gripped your nipples through your shirt and twisted. “No Sergeant!”
He let go then, closing the lid of the laptop and standing with it to leave.
“Got an LT having trouble with his phone, he's naw as friendly as me though so best limit the back chat soldier.”
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Price x Ftm!lieutenant!Reader general dating hcs pls and tyy
Dating headcanons W/ John Price.
Warning: SFW AND NSFW mentioned, clingy price, mentions of killing someone, slightly possessive Price, switch Price and switch reader.
SFW
Before you and Price started dating, the two of you are already close friends, you two joined the military together and trained together back then before you guys are in your current ranks.
He is very sweet to you and supports you being a trans person.
He found out you were trans waaaayyyy back then, and the way he reacts was kinda random..
"Wait.. so your one of those transformers robots????" He looked at you dumbfounded as he scanned the surgery scars on your chest.
He was very confused.. but still supports you!
When someone was being toxic to you he WILL and not hesitate to unalive them.
He loves you too much see😭
He'll give them the coldest death stared making their bones quiver in fear.
He will cuddle you, and be hella clingy.
Imagine.
You both at the halls of the base and he's just hugging you, not caring if anyone is watching.
He would call you to his office to just hold you and have you sit on his lap.
Hell, every once i a while he'll make you skip training just to have you there with him..
He will never let you out of his sight.
NEVER.
You're his sunshine afterall, his Marshmellow to the hot cocoa, his sauce to the spaghetti, his peach to the eggplant (okay thats just weird..)
When you're both at home, he wouldn't let you go out to buy groceries and insisted that he should be the one buying.
He's just scared because he overthinks that someone will kidnap you.
He doesn't even care if you know self-defense 💀
When both of you go out on a date he'll take you out to the beautiful restaurants ever, but he rather keep it simply
He'll even buy you beautiful clothes to match your date.
One time both of you went to a Chinese sea food restaurant that serves raw and fresh sea food.
He bought himself those tentacles cus he wanna try them out.
End up sticking to his face.
Both of you gotta go to the doctor cus the tentacles suction wont let go.
He was traumatized and both of you never went to those fresh sea food restaurant.
NSFW
After ever date there should a spicy intimate time with him.
He would bend you over when you both in your car or at your house.
Just somewhere private where both of you could fuck.
He loves dominating you, but sometimes he also likes it when you're the one dominating him
He likes it when you overstimulate him till he's a whining mess when you're taking the lead.
You just loos so sexy ontop him while riding his cock while calling him a good boy.
It makes his cock twitch when you do that.
And the way you moan just sends him over the edge.
But when he's the one in control he would bend you over doggy style and hit your prostate head on with his tip.
He absolutely loves when you moan out his name.
Its just so cute.
He likes raw sex.
He wanna make sure to mark your insides aswell your body to show who you belong.
He loves it when your cunt squeezed his cock.
He'll call you a good boy for that.
When both of you are more on the romantic side he'll be gentle and loving with you.
He'll caressed your body and worship you.
He loves touching your scars btw.
He thinks its fascinating.
"God baby.. you're so damn beautiful.. such a handsome boy eh?.." He softly praised against your ear as he touched your scars.
He grunted when your cunt tightened around him.
"You're getting so tight around me baby boy.. such a good boy huh?"
Yeh...
He sometimes think about having a child with you sometimes.
This man has an extreme breeding kink...
Sometimes he'll rub your lower belly while he's fucking you cunt, whispering praises while he day dream of getting you pregnant.
He's glad you have a cunt ngl.
He could just impregnate you anytime..
But you're still a soldier and you still wanna keep the job so he respects that.
He'll wait when he's allowed to Impregnate you.
But he wont stop fucking you raw.
Sooo you have no choice but to go on birth control🤷.
#cod x male reader#x male reader#bottom male reader#cod x ftm reader#cod x male reader smut#ftm reader#x ftm reader#ftm sub#ftm bottom#price x male reader smut#price x male reader#john price x male reader#captain price#price x reader
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can we have a headcannon of y/n (female) thats throwing dark humour around everytime and have 141 + Rudy, Alejandro nd konig react to her lmao 🤣
Can we have that? 💜 Thank you
Girl. Literally me. (I give my coworkers whiplash but they dish it pretty good too lmao)
Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley:
Might actually get a decent laugh out of him, we’ve all heard his horrendous hilarious jokes, so we all know he can dish it, but can he take it? Depends on the type of humor
If it’s self-depreciating, probably not. Doesn’t really get it? Like he does but he sees you too positively for the humor to click.
Unalive jokes? Definitely not. Hates hearing it from you even if you’re laughing about it, so if you want to make them, you better be cheeky about it (“Head down, sergeant you’ll get spotted.” “Aw sweet, you think so?” You don’t have to be near him or even see him to feel his glare)
Jokes about your traumas? Not super keen on it but if you’re at a point in your life that you feel ok enough to laugh about it, he’s not one to take wind out of your sails (“Damn, this drink hits harder than my dad.” “Sweetheart. Please.”
But if your jokes are similar to his, then your chances of getting a laugh out of him went up exponentially (he thinks he’s so god damn funny and he’s right. king.)
“How do you turn a salad into a Cesar salad?”
“How?”
“Stab it 23 times.” Soap audibly groaned,
“That’s my girl.”
All in all, you’ll get a deep sigh with pinching the bridge of his nose for every joke you make, and maybe you’ll get a pretty laugh from him (god I bet his laugh is so nice 😭)
John ‘Soap’ MacTavish:
(laughs nervously) what the fuck?
He’s heard Ghost’s jokes firsthand, so the dark humor isn’t new to him. He might even laugh with you and crack a few of his own
Honestly, as long you’re having a laugh he’s not really that worried (still a little worried tho)
He trusts that if you’re feeling particularly bad about something, you’d talk to him about it and he’s here for that
He kind of enjoys the theatre of it, the dramatic reactions to something so seemingly mundane,
“So when are you gonna take me out?”
“To dinner? We just ate, bonnie.”
“… not what I meant but I love where your heads at.”
“Not in a million years.” He laughs kissing your temple and squeezing you against him
“So you’re saying there’s a chance? It’s just a matter of when, got it. Thanks babe, I owe you”
John Price:
He’s not thrilled about it but he’s worked with Ghost so he’s somewhat built a tolerance
He knows you sometimes use dark humor as a coping mechanism but he’ll tease you saying you should come with a warning label
He’s definitely choked at hearing some of the things come out of your mouth, at least the jokes relating to your own traumas, those always give him whiplash
He finds your situational dark humor much funnier than anything you might say that involves you being harmed, even if it is a joke that’s kind a nightmare scenario for him
Those will definitely get a chuckle out of him, just please stop making jokes about yourself, he loves you a little too much to stomach them
“What does my dad have in common with Nemo?” He refuses to answer, he knows, he fucking knows
“They both can’t be found.”
God damn it, sweetheart
Kyle ‘Gaz’ Gerrick:
He’ll join you for sure lmao
He’ll see you sparring on the mats with Soap and he sees you land a particularly rough kick that he managed to block
“Damn babe, that was clean. Now do it right here.” He’s pointing at his temple, you laugh and throw your sweaty towel at him
You’re out on recon and you’re making your way towards the targeted area,
“I’d be terrible if I was discovered, sure hope there aren’t any snipers to take me out. That’d be awful.”
Price groaned even as Kyle stifled a chuckle,
“Come on, love, we’re a bit too good to let that happen to you.”
“That’s the real tragedy, honestly.”
“Enough, you two.”
König:
He thinks you’re funny but low key a little worried at how easily the jokes come to you
But if you’re laughing and having a good time, then so is he!
Sometimes you really do say some crazy things and he doesn’t know whether to laugh or to hug you
He likes the jokes that have nothing to do with you much better, you’d be sitting at a briefing in the far corner when you lean in and whisper quietly,
“Köni, what’s red and bad for your teeth?”
“Hm?”
“A brick.”
He stifles a laugh and shakes his head, you can see the corners of his eyes crinkle as he tries to hide the smile.
Alejandro Vargas:
Honestly, he kind of gives me the vibe of “telling a joke becomes receiving a lecture”
Like you’ll make a joke and look at him and he’s deadpanned,
“Mi amor, that’s no laughing matter.” And then he goes into a full lecture about why what you said was out of pocket and a little hurtful
It’s not that he doesn’t understand the humor he’s just concerned
But, he prefers the goofier jokes I feel like,
“An apple a day keeps the doctor away, or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.”
“Mensa.” He pushes your shoulder playfully with a laugh.
Dumb jokes like that get a good laugh out of him, just don’t make them about you please he loves you so much and he will lecture you
Rodolfo Parra:
Mortified in Spanish
“Mi vida, please don’t make those jokes.”
They break his poor little heart :( he loves you so much it makes him sad to hear make such harsh jokes about yourself or even see such awful things
He sighs every time he hears one of your jokes and gives this look 🥺
He doesn’t like that you joke about yourself or the things that have happened to you like that
He understands that humor is sometimes a coping mechanism, but he’d much rather talk through the things you’re joking about
He just cares about you so god damn MUCH
But if they’re nonsensical, then he’ll chuckle quietly,
“You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving.”
“What? Amor you definitely-”
“You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.”
“Dios mío, amor.” He chuckles.
#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#soap mactavish x reader#john soap mactavish x reader#john soap mctavish x reader#soap mctavish x reader#soap x reader#john price x reader#captain john price x reader#captain price x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#kyle garrick x reader#gaz x reader#könig x reader#konig x reader#alejandro vargas x reader#alejandro x reader#rodolfo rudy parra x reader#rodolfo parra x reader#rudolfo parra x reader#cod x reader#mw2 x reader#cod mw2#cod mwii#cod headcanons
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MAKING A BIG OL POST OF EVERYTHING I GOTTA SAY ABOUT THE NEW SPOOKY MONTH BECAUSE HOLY SHITTTT THERES A LOT
‼️‼️SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY‼️‼️
THE THIEVES ARE BACK WOOOOOOOO!! IVE MISSED THEM SM
also eepy lila
while gathering images for this ive noticed that the "pile of dexter" as im calling it is staring at the thieves the whole time they're in the attic (specifically fat thief)
is he somehow still alive???? just possessing a pile of dead doll????????
so cool to see the big ass spider get some actual relevance!! def gonna be important next episode for sure
ROSS'S DAD!!!!!!!!
also jaune is so pretty with her hair down like omggg... love to see her being such a supportive friend to lila as well
"are you throwing away dad's stuff mom?" WAAAAAA MY POOR BABYYY IM GONNA CRYYY
HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN HI KEVIN
theyre so me
DEXTERRRRJRJRJRHSHSHDBBDBSB!!+!!!!!(!!
"this cat looks sick im taking it to the vet" BULLSHIT i know what you are. ����️👁️
DEXTER'S MOM!?!?????!?!?!?!?!!!??? i had no idea she would ever show up like wow i did not expect to see her at all
poor little babies and their lack of parents
ok sorry ik im joking here but MAN this scene made me feel bad 😭😭😭
THE FUCK.
pretty sure this dude is the same guy as the "costume bob" in the last episode??? i felt bad for him last time but here he seems like kind of a pathetic and weird ass man ngl lol
RADFORRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!(!!(;+;!;(;;(;??;(;;!!(+!!++!(++!
HES SUCH A GOD DAMN SILLY NERD MAN LIKEEEEE "he even sounds like he does in the movies!!!!!!" BROOOO I LOVE HIMMMMMMMMMM DJJDGWHDHSHFH
he is EXACTLY how i pictured he would be!! my brain is not gonna shut up about him for the next few days i just know it HAHAHAH
also my caramelpopcorn (thats their ship name right?? or was it candycorn??? i forgor lol) heart is completely full, i loved actually seeing him and kevin canonically interact, they are perfect <3
HES IN THE CANDY CLUB OUTFIRTBD RJSHNF EBDJFBSBDJC EJDUFBEBW DKXN SCUEBFNFBRJSJCJCHDB!!!!(!!!!!;+;(;!!(+!!
"im... uh... like an uncle!!" "i just wanna help the children..." BROO??? feeling kinda bad for frank rn, these are like the only kids he genuinely cares about and hes being turned away from em
ik hes a shady guy but STILL
GREGOR LOOKS SO GOOFY DOING THE DANCE JDBDHSHFHD LIKE WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE THATTTTT
also i made this gif myself yall better like it
aaaaaaaaaand dexter's mom is dead.
like son like mother i guess 💀
love how ignacio's door has small little boards on it from when they bashed it with a hammer HAHAHHA
also, looking at the inside of ignacio's house, is that john's family on the little table there???
one of the images in the arg gives a better look at this, but i had no idea it was in IGNACIO'S HOUSE of all places. why does he have that??? and right by the gun too.... what is this silly cult man planning......
(the arg image in question if yall were wondering)
"we understand you" "we're here for you dude" "thank you guys, i just wish things weren't so..." HATZGANG FRIENDSHIP WAAAAA!!!!!
also ROY HAS BEEN THROUGH SHIT MY POOR GUYYYY i wanna hug him mannnn 🥺
IMAGE LIMIT IS KILLING ME SO IM GONNA REBLOG THIS WITH MORE SHIT TO SAY BECAUSE I AM NOT DONE MANNN‼️‼️‼️‼️
#spooky month#sr pelo spooky month#spooky month spoilers#skid#pump#skid and pump#lila spooky month#lila#fat thief#thin thief#kevin#kevin spooky month#dexter erotoph#radford#radford spooky month#father gregor#frank#frank spooky month#jaune#ross's dad#ross's dad spooky month#ignacio#hatzgang#roy spooky month#ross spooky month#robert spooky month#roy#ross#robert
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You giving 141 + König aftercare. GN READER!
Cw: implied pegging, mentions of overstimulation
Kyle “gaz” Garrick
God damn he is sensitive 😭
He lays there for a few minutes about to fall asleep while you wipe him him up he insists on cleanup he doesn’t want jizz or lube to stain his linen (he also just wants to be taken care of)
He’s so smug while you clean him up he just lays there half awake absolutely wrecked with a little smug smile
Afterwards he tiredly cuddles you and tells you how much he enjoyed himself (and then will complain for weeks about how sore he is)
John price
Is also pretty sensitive but hey this is VERY new for him he’s not really used to bottoming but he’s pretty open minded for you
He doesn’t like to admit it but he likes when you take care of him he’d shoot himself in the foot before admitting he likes being the center of your attention
The only way you can still get him to blush is when your cleaning him up
John “soap” mactavish
He is the most shameless out of all of them
Arches his back and moans like your groping his very soul especially during clean up (he acts like a cat in heat 💀)
He really likes when you take the time to clean him up after sex it makes him feel very loved (and little turned on)
Simon “ghost” Riley
He is so emotionally exhausted after sex but usually he can handle it but when he’s bottoming he feels so much more vulnerable
He tries to stay calm but his eyes start to sting and he has to take a second to gather himself :((
He’s still working to be more emotionally open with you and it’s difficult for him to tell you how he’s feeling so most the time he keeps it to himself he just can’t put it into words
But after something so big like this he can’t help but pour out how happy he feels that he’s found someone like you
König
He is so overstimulated but he’s so happy even if he’s shaky and sensitive “liebling! Careful!” he likes when you take your time and if he feels like your rushing he’ll act like it hurts so you’ll slow down
His legs are so shaky and he will be sore for a while and he knows it so he uses it to his advantage (he makes you do everything for him)
He’s such a brat 🙄
((✿: I did the reverse of these hcs of them taking care of you if your interested also gaz is so fun to write hes so cute// if you requested stuff yesterday I’ll try to get to it promise 🙏😭))
#simon ghost riley x reader#cod x reader#simon riley x you#könig x reader#john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#cod headcanons#141 headcanons
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We need more sub top gale fics omggggg i need it so bad😭😭😭
SUB TOP GALE???? ANON YOU CANT JUST DROP THAT BOMB AND EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY OH MY GODDDDD
sub top Gale..... sub top Gale oh my God sub top Gale... I'm spiralling anon what have you done to me
Gale who always wants to please, to put a smile on John's face, to make him feel good and have him bucking his hips up in pleasure, grip the sheets while he keens high in his throat
but he also wants to be bossed around, told what to do, wants to go so numb that he doesn't even need to think, wants to be used as a toy almost, and John obliges him perfectly
BUT Gale is also a fucking brat, whenever John is ordering him around he'll be like "oh yeah? or what?" and the fight makes the fall even better, because at some point John will snap and just be rough with him, tie him down or gag him or put nipple clamps on him, telling him he's been bad, he's only good for being John's toy, huh? but God does he have a mouth on him, toys don't talk do they? and Gale whines and nods while John grinds down on him, looking up at him like John hung the damn stars
will do anything for him, would spend hours on his knees while John runs a hand through his hair, calling him good and so damn pretty, tucks his thumb into Gales mouth and hooks his jaw open, spits in his mouth and makes Gale swallow, and Gale does so so well, always wants to please John, could never dream of doing anything wrong (of course, this is after he drops, he's a big piece of shit when he wants to put up a fight)
anon I fear you broke me with this ask I'm spiralling this is one of the tastiest and juiciest things I've ever thought of
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SUPERNATURAL SEASON 15 - THE BITTER END - SERIES FINALE
We finally made it here.
Ooooooooh boy. 😬
The opening for THE series finale felt out of place to me.
You’re gonna waste minutes on this really?
How about a discussion about how they beat God, like they actually managed the impossible - 2 dudes just take the fight to the OG master & creator of the universe and won that shit with some plan they pulled outta their asses. Their surrogate child went on to become the next primordial being to reign over the universe. But no, we’re not gonna even talk about any of that.
Coulda done a million different things even with the COVID restrictions (the two actors in a room across a table, do whatever to keep them safe) but whatever 🤦🏾♀️
So after God comes vampires w/ masks? Really SPN?
The minute Dean slammed the Impala’s trunk shut after sundown made me nervous (that would be the last time he’s with his Impala, the last time he ever sees her w/ his own eyes 🥺😭)
Out of all the folks to pull outta the SPN peanut gallery you pick that random chick from 1x19?! Jenny?! Just to kill her off anyway (so I spoke too soon, vampJenny is the official last female to die on this show)
Ah…the nail of imminent demise
That final shot of Sam & Dean was toooo fucking intimate.
Suddenly the Wincest people aren’t so crazy. Why are y’all encouraging this?! Dude, they’re brothers!?! #brothersnotlovers. They could’ve done it like the end of Pearl Harbor where they got Ben Affleck crying over Josh Harnett’s body in the crash. Gimme weepy Sam, that Oscar moment. Dean died sooo young 🥺😒 younger than Mary (I know she was technically in her thirties but TBH she was 64/65), bobby, Rufus, Ellen & John. This is why we can’t have nice things😔
Cas is gonna be so saaaad. He always fought so hard for Dean's sake, only for the guy to die so young…it’s an insult - an outrage really. Dean fought so hard for so long only for him to say - it was always gonna end this way?! 😡
He didn’t have to make it to old age (though he deserved to) but don’t let him die like this. All accepting so soon after resolving the meta plot 😔 there were things Dean probably wanted to do and now, he’ll never get his chance. He could’ve settled down with someone (it wouldn’t have been Cas since he got killed off already but shit I would’ve settled for Dean to settle with anyone for a minute, like Sam did) - also would’ve been nice to hear from Jody or Donna and others one last time but hey fuck the side characters 🤣 (oh COVID the scapegoat that keeps on giving - it’s like the showrunners forgot the convenience of modern technology).
So Chuck definitely won - he's no longer burdened by having to deal w/ the universe and one of the Winchesters died anyway. Not exactly as planned but they never broke free, not really. I totally subscribe to this theory. Especially since it’s alluded to that Dean Jr - Sam’s son - is a hunter also at the time of Sam’s death by old age (we think��I’m just saying that’s an awful not of tubes and stuff for the old man, maybe just to monitor his heart rate/health - eh)
The Sam wig is bad but eh - doesn’t bother me - we’re talking about a CW show wrapping up a project, it’s not the end of the world people, the plot is what matter s and the plot here is a fucking shit show my lord. It’s not the first show to suffer a shit ending to a show that captivated worldwide audiences but damn this is a bummer.
Especially since it’s alluded to that Dean Jr - Sam’s son - is a hunter also at the time of Sam’s death by old age (we think…I’m just saying that’s an awful not of tubes and stuff for the old man, maybe just to monitor his heart rate/health - eh) But yay for Sam apparently - couldn’t think of a better name for your son than Dean Jr.? It only makes sense to make the kid a junior if it was Dean’s actual kid, like Dean would’ve been Dean Sr. And his boy would’ve been Dean Jr. or Dean W. The II. And and hello there women whose face we don’t get to see (really committing to limiting women’s presence in the show - again probably blaming in on COVID but if you have a literal baby with this giant man, you can chance a woman being there in an actual camera shot where we can see her face 🙄) Back to Dean - again cuz of COVID? I guess - we don’t get to see him reunite with anyone (not his MOM even?) except Bobby for like 1 second and then he’s just driving around in his car. No roadhouse, no fishing, nothing but sitting in his car, alone killing time until Sam inevitably returns to him.
Oh what a shame…
So that happened I guess. SPN was something else, for better or worse. Probably never gonna get a show like that again. They tried it with the Winchesters spin off about a supposed alternate universe MaryxJohn thing and friends but honestly if its not about the Winchesters brothers or Destiel who cares 🤣 they pretty much wrapped up Sam & Dean’s stories thanks to this finale but Dean (per the Winchesters flop) could be brought back into the fray somehow if they wanted - but hey that’s what fanfiction’s for 😁
Well SPN it’s been interesting…sort of.
On that note…
I wanna thank the fans of the show, your hot takes, memes and general fervor over this show/story is what finally made me watch it all. Cuz I remember the TV spots from back in the day, cruising the CW channel on weeknights after school. I was too busy watching other shows to give SPN a chance while it aired. So thank you 🙏🏽
#supernatural#dean winchester#sam winchester#castiel#brothersnotlovers#the winchester family#the winchester brothers#rip adam#deancas#destiel#jack kline#chuck shurley#chuck won theory#chuck won#spn finale#spn final season#supernatural season 15#spnfandom
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bridgerton season 3 episode 4 screaming thoughts (unedited)
AW DEBLING THAT WAS SO CUTE 😭 colin step it up jeez
lol she likes that window cuz she can see the bridgerton house from there
oh ben is back at it again
CUTIE POMERANIAN
me and the queen thinking same thoughts cuz?????? how the hell brimsley reading all that from back there
i just know the queen is gonna hate the bridgertons when franny doesnt pick the marquis
HYACINTH 🤣🤣🤣
JOHN FCKING STIRLING JOHN STIRLING IS IN THE HOUSE YALL ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
VIOLET IS SO FUNNY WITH HER LOOKS LIKE SHE CAN JUST TELL RIGHT AWAY
wait theyre so funny 😭😭😭😭 not them literally sitting in silence
alice is gorgeous i cant wrap my head around their family storyline when shes onscreen
OMG IS THIS WHERE THEY’LL PLAY JEALOUS
eloise 😭 read the room 😭
o god colin
oh :((((((((((( oh lol nvm :>>>>>> theyre in agreement
hes so cute 🥹🥹🥹
hElp why am i rooting for debling COLIN DO BETTER !!!!!!! DAMN U COLIN what is it with him and 3somes
franny is so cute 🥹🥹🥹
pausing the ep to say that the visitor for cressida is def eloise
yep i was right
boys rly are boys at any period of time *sigh*
colin get out of there buddy … is he gonna wank it out
look okay portia does have a point but but but 🥺 love
did kate and anthony seriously go on an extended honeymoon 🙃 shes gonna be pregnant when they get back
violet knows what she’s doing and i love her for that
its the hairstyle of the queen the went viral
oh alice ur so beautiful
idk about this violet storyline 🥺 between me and her i feel like im the one who’s not over edmund 😭😭
i want eloise cressida and pen to be just friends and for cressida to say sorry to pen and grovel
LORD KILMARTIN BACK IN THE HOUSE i love him 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
philippa really selling the pregnant thingy 😭😭😭 o are they both pregnant
SNOW ON THE BEACH !!!!!!!!!!
eloise is back
O GOD COLIN ‼️
debling is connecting the dots
okay so colin, honey, listen. you will only resolve this if u like propose like rn
portia pls love ur daughter
AW IT WAS SHEET MUSIC??? 🥹🥹🥹���
COLIN YES GO COLIN wait he ran after the carriage 🤭🤭
wait did they not play jealous at all yet? or have i missed it
COLIN SAY IT SAY ITTTTTTTTTTTTT
CARRIAGE SCENE PLS ‼️🤞🤞🤞
despite being the writer of the bridgerton family, and yes he is good with words, he has yet to have like a distinct monologue or line that becomes the pinnacle of the season
YES PENELOPE YES SPEAK UR TRUTH AND GET UR MAN
omg omg omg omg omg
i forgot what song title it is but omg its the pitch perfect song 😭
OH HES GOING FOR IT
seggs scenes are so awkward for me lmao
okay wait i love this
AHHHHHHHHH
oh no now he has to find out shes lady whistledown
OMG HE SAID THE THING HE SAID THE THING
#bridgerton#anthony bridgerton#kate sharma#kathony#kate sheffield#benedict bridgerton#daphne bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#gregory bridgerton#francesca bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#colin x penelope#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#polin
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bad liar / mason mount
request: heyy! can i request something like where the reader and mason mount are in a secret relationship and one time mason accidently called a woman by your name while hanging out with his teammates? thank you x
author's note: this is like the oldest request i have rn 😭 sorry that it took this long. hope you like it!! feedback is always appreciated, tysm<3
word count: 1k
you had never talked about keeping it secret in the first place, but it felt good to keep your relationship between you, close to your chest and away from judging stares and evil whispers behind your back. the fear that they could label you as unprofessional due to how you two had met in the first place -being part of the staff at the national team, and mason being a player- sure creeped in the back of your mind from time to time, making you doubt about everything you two had built during the year you had been together. but mason, being the incredible understanding and loving person that he was, always assured you that you two weren't doing anything wrong, and that your job was safe.
still, only your families knew about you two: not even his teammates at chelsea, and certainly not his mates from the national team.
you were certain that no one suspected anything yet, but you also knew that your boyfriend was like a little kid trying to hide what he got you for your birthday: he can't keep his mouth shut, even if his life depended on it, and ended up spilling everything as soon as someone questions about it. but he had been committed, gladly, to your request: when we tell the world, it had to be in your terms. and you had to congratulate him for how well he was holding up, lasting a year with no hints or slip ups.
at least, until tonight.
he spoke, in a joyful tone, maybe a bit taken by the alcohol already. "thanks, y/n- i mean, sasha". he had tried to thank jack's missus, for passing him the snack bowl, when your name spilled from his mouth before he could catch it. in that second, he sobered up instantly and prayed that everyone at the couch was too busy watching the game jack had practically begged to watch, to even heard his lapsus. his prayers went unanswered, he realised, when he saw his teammates' faces, shocked in recognition at hearing your name exit his lips.
"wait, what? did you say y/n?," jack inquired.
"what?" mason tried to act nonchalant, knowing damn well that he never could hide the smile that adorned his lips when he lied. it was even worse that the fact made him remember you, how you always tease him about how he's such a bad liar, which again, made it even harder for him to appear innocent.
"y/n, as in our physio at england camp, y/n?" john reassessed again, providing context for those who hadn't quite understood what was the matter with the name that had exited their teammate' lips.
"you're hearing things" the chelsea player tried to downplay the situation, gulping a big sip of his beer, which he had noticed that he was holding onto the bottle with excessive force, as his fingers were turning white. "i think john heard just right," assured his best friend with a growing smirk on his face. he had picked about it the last time they were at camp, but mason had denied it every time, so he dropped it. until now.
"shut up, declan" the boy grumbled, already annoyed at the topic, but mostly at him, knowing that there was no way that they would drop it if he didn't admit that, yeah, he had accidentally called your name.
"well, she's pretty cute if you ask me" said conor, coming to the living room again after he had gone away to do god knows what. mason's patience was running low, and even more with the flirty tone his teammate at both his club and the national team had used. of course, he didn't know that you were already taken, but it had made his blood boil nonetheless. "if you don't shut your mouth now, gallagher…", mason said, with a threatening tone.
"oi, getting jealous now, aren't we?" stones joked, and he noticed that, in the heat of the moment, he had gotten neck-deep into the entire thing, and couldn't back down now. at least not without accepting defeat, which he was reluctant to do. he knew you wouldn't get mad at him if he told his teammates, but he still felt bad for doing so without talking to you about it first.
jack's eyes, now bright with the spark of mischief in them, pushed the subject further, wanting to hear his friend say what he had been thinking since the topic was first brought up. "is there something that we should know, masey boy? do you have a girl that you didn't told us about?," he continued with the banter, encouraged by the cheers the boys were shouting. along them were some of their girlfriends, like sasha, who slapped her boyfriend to try and stop him from embarrassing mason further.
"absolutely not. we're just colleagues," he was too quick to answer, feeling how his throat was drying alarmingly fast. he took another sip of his beer -that was already getting too hot for his liking-, which elicited a weird frown to grow on his face. "then call her right now and we'll see how she responds," suggested declan, and he immediately choked with his drink when he processed what his friend was asking of him.
"what does make you think that i have her numb-" he was interrupted when his phone, that was placed on the coffee table in front of him lightened up, showing his lockscreen with the notification that had prompted his screen to turn on in the first place.
message by y/n 🤍
thankfully, something had happened in the game which made all the boys focus on the tv screen rather than his friend who had rushed into the coffee table to pick up and hide the electronic device deep on his pockets. but john, who was seated next to him, got to see who had messaged mason and understood perfectly why he had reacted the way he did. he patted him on the back, before getting close to his ear to mutter "i personally don't have my colleague's contact saved with her name and a white heart emoji, but you do you, brother," with a mischievous smile on his face.
safe to say, the next time that the boys had to join the national team for international duty, your interactions with mason were closely watched. the fleeting glances and the lasting soft touches shared by you two only made their assumptions more real for them.
it was only a matter of time.
#mason mount x you#mason mount imagine#mason mount x reader#mason mount x y/n#football imagine#football x y/n#football x reader#football x you
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it's that time of the month again guys!
Malevolent part 47 The Hand live notes!!!
AMAZON AD👹 ANOTHER AD ANOTHER AD ANOTHER AD CAN WE JUST START THE EPISODE
FINALLY!!! um whats happening
are their asses still wandering aimlessly
six hours bruh 💀
a cage :/???
a what
a crime! no doubt!🤓
HAHA HE HAS THE PLAGUE i said yesterday That man probably has every disease by now
hes gonna die so bad guys hes a sick victorian child
ohhh john please carry me to the garden so i may see- um Hear the flowers one last time🤒
his sickness😟 i cant believe our actions have consequences
theyre ganging up on yorick😭
HAHA hes fine Physically me asf
"indescribable horrors" that doesnt stop john from describing every horror in immense detail
"we both have" im sorry john did you get stabbed like eight times🙄 this aint about you
💀he folded💀
HAHA so he wasnt lying damn😭 I KNEW IT blud was so ready to kill more children
john defending his comfort character
😟Sold Your Soul😟
"i offered myself to it" gayass
this speech goes so hard actually
NEW MUSIC NEW MUSIC
omg it sounds more hopeful now :((
aw he thanked arthur :)
god damn it yorick🙄
WHAT does the corpse have the hand
i mean they did pinky promise
HIS EYE 😦😦
loose enough to pry with ur fingers😨
yorick is building frankensteins monster i fear
MALEVOLENCE MENTIONED NO WAY NO WAYYYYYY NORWAY IS THIS WHY THE SHOW IS NAMED THIS
can yorick lie is that a thing😟😟😟
come on arthur you were a boyscout u can climb this easily
"the pole is wood" just like mine haha🙏🙏🙏🙏
theyre gonna start a forest fire😶
just throw something at it guys idk
omg a pin‼️ throw something at it!!
"excellent hypothesis my king🤓" "JOHN👹" "right!!🤓"
THEYRE GONNA THROW A ROCK YEAAAAA💥💥💥💥
hows he gonna throw when hes blind
why is he so good at throwing wtf
i guess we cant stay here throwing rocks for the entire episode
ALEXANDER :333
EUHGHH😟😟😟😟😟
DONT THROW ROCKS AT BIRDS THATS HOW THE HORRORS HAPPEN
maybe alexander isnt evil n hes just trying to protect us idk🤕
"i was never much for athletics" we can tell
theres gotta be a theme this season and its gotta be Children or Childhood or something
"if they could see me now" mmmm
WHAT IS THAAATT HUHHH
😨😨😨😨
WHAT IS THATTTTTTT WHAGAAT
maybe its just a freaky bird
hes so good at falling down holes
WHAT HAHA WE CANT RN😭😭
😦ERM? YORICK???????
KELLIN MENTIONED big day for gay people 🙏🙏
so was yorick always evil orrrr coz he said My King instead of john and yorick has called him john before
guys i think alexander might be the Not Evil one here
hand of malevolence would go so hard as like a window decoration
ur telling me john knew what a Hand of Malevolence was and didnt link it to the dark world
NOOO DUMBASS
ummm 😟 whats all this then
YORICK :3333 HIIII :3
what 😀
"john" :3
HAHA what is going on bruh
OMG WHAGT 😃😃😃 thats banger
"thank you i think"
:(( aw alexander IS evil :((((((
she? 🤕
OHHH IS IT LILITH IS IT LILITH PLS LILITH PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
lilith and kayne are having a custody battle over them funny as hell
OHHH she was in the portal
TEEHEE WE'RE HER FAVORITE :33
dont confront her i feel
but theyre BOTH terrible at lying🤕
they're cooked i fear
hes DYING😟😟😟😟😟😟
An Owl Being Strange
flies are insects darling
they finally appreciate yorick :)
john we dont have time for this omg
HAHA silly asf
they have a safeword now
harlan's really making us work for it like im gonna forget this if they dont point it out
the candle has been running out for hours fr
nooo :( r we approaching the ending
how do we still have like 15 minutes left
HAHA this is so funny theyre roleplaying
theyre yes-and'ing like theatre kids
i mean i bet she noticed yall were gone for a solid 15 minutes
so is the king in yellow just not a threat anymore like did we defeat him i forgot
are we in an alternate universe then
i know far too much!🤓☝️
arthur caught the decima virus i fear
STOP COUGHING im so worried
arthur needs his vaccines fr
is he gonna faint
"and if i am sick-" "you are😐"
OH the ring
hes really gonna go over there and spread his plague around 🙄
i feel like arthur wont even make it to the castle🤒
he coughs like a dad
"lean on me" maybe if you had a physical form😐
oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck
we just have to wing it i guess
its WHAT😨
what is going on man 😟
UM😦🤕
WHAAT THATS IT? wtf
#malevolent#malevolent podcast#arthur lester#john doe#john doe malevolent#malevolentpod#malevolent 47#arthur lester malevolent
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“Yoooo we got people watching us, John!”
“Oh…Great…”
“We have what?”
_____
Welcome to the second “John and Mary” ask blog! This one, the time is around when they were in high school, so obviously no Ryder yet (although you could technically send asks about him…for fun…). Here’s some info about some of the characters! More characters will come if people ask for them.
John Emerson- 16, sophomore; Kinda popular guy if I do say…Although he’s popular in the way that everyone is either SUPER nice to him (fake) or scared of him. He’s told people that he’s interested in becoming a cop, and most people tried to get on his good side so they “don’t get in trouble”…He tells them that’s not exactly how that works, but he’s given up at this point. At least he gets to avoid the bullying part of high school. He looks super scary and intimidating (which, he is…) but he’s also really cool and he’ll try to help a person out if they’re having a problem. (Ex: Driving a person home because they missed the bus, he lets people vent to him if he has the time, etc.) He overworks himself a LOT. He has a lot of freedom, but that’s only because his parents. Don’t. Really…care? He guesses that he wasn’t planned, and his parents weren’t really interested in taking care of him after he got to the age where he could take care of himself. Bro is a people pleaser, someone please tell him he’s doing a great job…
Mary Winters- 15, sophomore; She has a late birthday, but everyone assumes that she’s really smart because she’s a year younger than them (She’s a few months younger than John). She IS pretty smart, book wise. People and world wise…Not so much. She’s usually quiet, and focuses on her work. She isn’t picked on much. Nobody really knows she’s there half the time. Where John’s parents were neglecting, hers was controlling. She can’t do much of anything without their permission and supervision. God forbid she goes outside without telling them, she’ll get an earful about it later. All she knows is school, home, and that’s basically it. It seems like her parents don’t want her to…grow up. She doesn’t question it though, after all, it’s all she’s known. She gets absolutely petrified if a boy asks her out (joke or not), her parents would probably ground her if she said yes. She’s not even allowed to go out to eat without her parents being there…Give my girl some damn freedom PLEASE. 😭 (Don’t worry, John does eventually).
Altair Sterling- 14, freshman; He’s the new boy of the group. As a freshman, he used to get RELENTLESSLY bullied, before John took notice of it and people started backing off. He doesn’t really know a lot of people yet, but he’s already taken a liking to John, almost too much. He doesn’t understand it, but he gets abnormally happy when Emerson calls him over from across the hall after school lets out. They get to hang out? He wants to hang out with him? Hell yeah! He mostly likes his math and English classes, but he also likes psychology and space. He plans to become a sort of psychologist, maybe a therapist. He listens a lot…Maybe that’s a good career for him? Ah, he doesn’t know…It’s too early to start planning…But he wants to!
Andrew Barrett- 15, sophomore; He kinda acts like he’s an overly confident person, but he’s actually really insecure, it doesn’t help that he also gets bullied because of his weight. “Andrew, my guy, you don’t look that bad. You’re not unhealthy, you’re fine. Don’t listen to them-“ “Do you think I can do a cartwheel from this end of the classroom to the other when the teacher leaves to go to the bathroom?” “…God fucking damnit, Barrett…” He tries to tease and jokingly pick on John every chance he gets, and tells him ridiculous things that make a man want to throw something. It’s a surprise that John hasn’t kicked him down yet. He is a bro, however. If you need something, he’ll probably go to John because “Emerson knows all” and he’ll fix it for you. If he tries to help? He’ll probably ruin it or make things worse. He’s not one for liking any core subject, but he does like art class a lot. This is his second year taking an art class (it’s art 2, he’s not retaking-). He wants to become some sort of artist, but he doesn’t know which one yet; he likes painting and he doodles a lot in his notes, so maybe a painter?
Now, teacher names! Only the important ones, because 11th and 12th aren’t important.
Mrs. Littrell- 9th and 10th grade English teacher, she’s honestly really good at her job. Everyone loves her.
Mrs. J.- 10th grade math teacher, she’s overly happy, but she brightens her students days with her extraness, they love her (John hates her in the sense of “it’s too damn early for aLL THIS NOISE-“)
Mr. Carroll- 9th grade math teacher, literally so chill, but he also makes sure to get the quota for the day “listen guys, I don’t want to do this either, but I like my job, soooooo….”
Mrs. Kathrine- 9th and 10th grade science teacher, she has two sciences that she teaches: Biology, and Earth and Space. She gives the kids mental health days where “hey, if you have late work, turn it in RIGHT N O W, or it’s half credit for the rest of the year, win or lose, your choice.” She’s that teacher that has all the snacks and literally EVERYTHING a student would ever need stashed in her classroom closet.
Mr. Beach- 9th grade “US history 1” and 10th “US history 2” teacher, he’s similar to Mr. Carroll, but he’s more joking about it. “Oh, you don’t want to work today? Too bad, so sad, *hits his long ruler on the desk* DO IT.” He also taps the ruler on the top of his student’s heads when he’s teaching at the board, because bro is BORED and the reactions he gets are funny. Mary tries to duck away from the ruler, while John grabs it and tries to bonk him in the head with it. He’s lucky Mr. Beach doesn’t like to write people up. He’s strangely interested in all the wars. He also has a rubber duck collection up at the top of his cabinets, his students sacrifices their rubber ducks to him because he’s a cool teacher. Also he claims that he’s married to a woman, but LITERALLY EVERYONE thinks he’s a little gay. “Listen, Mr. Beach said he has a spouse, NOT a wife, plus he doesn’t have kids! HE’S A FA-“ “ANDREW BARRETT IF YOU DON’T SHUT THE FUCK UP-“
Mr. Lawrence- Psychology teacher, he’s THE sarcastic teacher but in the funniest way possible. He turns every complaint and weird comment thrown his way into a salty response. He hates presentations, he doesn’t want to grade them, so he gives the students a puzzle sheet and “claims” that it’s a grade for it. He grades SO SLOWLY. Literally every quarter, there’s at least one student BEGGING HIM to hurry up and grade. “Sorry guys, sports was crazy last weekend-“ “MR. LAWRENCE PLEASE MY PARENTS ARE GOING TO GROUND ME IF I DON’T GET AN A IN THIS CLASS- ITS A C- IT WOULD BE AN A IF YOU’D HURRY THE FRICK UP-“
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I do believe that’s about it! Please no overly NSFW asks, we don’t do that here. However if it’s a “your mom” joke or something similar to that kind of suggestive, go ahead. They’ll probably make a remark back!
Important tags!
#johnask
#maryask
#altairask
#andrewask
#littrellask
#jask
#carrollask
#kathrineask
#beachask
#lawrenceask
And of course the characters that will be tagged in the post relating to the ask, but I don’t want to type that.
Please note that there’s obviously mentions of child neglect, discrimination, child abuse (…someone gets a little beat at home) and slightly suggestive language (it’s not THAT but y’know…Guys…being silly and joking around…)
Some asks will be drawn, some will be written!
Thank you, and here’s my main account if you need it@stanleyvampire14 -mod
#lotf#lord of the flies#lotf oc#john Emerson#Mary winters#Altair sterling#Andrew Barrett#/im too lazy to tag all the teachers#/please ask about Ryder that’d be so funny lmao ‘who is RYDER?’#I like Altair already#he’s a little guy
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What are some songs that make you really nostalgic?
Well, I could go on for a long time with this, so get ready for some serious yapping.
Don't You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia This came out when I was 21, and I used to listen to this ALL THE TIME. I'm talking maybe 10 times a day, for a few months. It's associated with a lot of good times in my life.
I NEED U - BTS This was more recent, I was 24 when it came out, but not only is it one I also associate with good times, the sad side of it is amplified by the death of my great aunt about two weeks afterwards. I'm not a very emotional guy at all, but to this day the original video can make me sob like a little kid.
Dancing With a Stranger - Sam Smith & Normani Ah, 2020. A year like no other. Covid spread to Korea pretty quick, so it was here when this song was released. Whole cities were locked down, including mine, so I would throw this banger on at least once or twice again. It does make me nostalgic, but let's be honest, who actually misses 2020?
TASTE - Stray Kids PLEASE, this song is SO DAMN GOOD This was much more recent, and it was released right after I turned 32. It reminds me of life back in Gwangju. Also the production on it is top notch, it's a fantastic song.
LA DI DA - EVERGLOW Ah yes, another 2020 song. Unfortunately, lockdown restrictions didn't relax majorly until 2022, so I had plenty of time to listen to this and its album counterparts in my spare time. Also, Yuehua, WHERE'S OUR FULL LENGTH ALBUM FROM EVERGLOW FOR GOD'S SAKE
The whole album of Return of the Girl - EVERGLOW December 2021. Still on lockdown. Thanks, China. All jokes aside, this was the closest thing we've gotten to a full length album and in my opinion one of the better ones, and brings back plenty of memories from Christmas 2021 with my entire extended family in America. I'll add that trying to leave South Korea during 2021 lockdown was an excruciatingly drawn out process. Thanks, China.
Sit Next to Me - Foster the People A true classic. When I used to visit my brother at his apartment (across half the goddamn country), they would always have this on in the pool hall. Good times.
Immortals - Fall Out Boy Of course, we all remember this song from Big Hero 6, but I can proudly say I was here for this song before then, which was only a month before the movie. Regardless, it's a great song and brings back those memories from being 24.
Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen Moving back a good while before I was around, this song was incredible. I heard it all the time growing up.
Burning Love - Elvis Presley Moving back even further, this is probably my favorite Elvis song. As mentioned in a previous post, my dad was a pretty big Elvis fan, so I grew up hearing his music.
Sweet Home Alabama - Lynyrd Skynyrd Ignoring all the memes, it's a great song and one of my favorite rock songs. Alabama accents kill me bro 🤣
Slow Dancing In a Burning Room - John Mayer This song is AMAZING dude
Scarborough Fair/Canticle - Simon & Garfunkel Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme
Levanter - Stray Kids Incredible song, and also reminds me of Gwangju.
Bad Boys - Theme from the show "Cops" I watched this show a lot back in the 90s and early 2000s, and because of that I worked as an officer for a few years before turning my career path elsewhere.
Sultans of Swing - Dire Straits My dad used to listen to this all the time when I was growing up, so it brings back some memories.
I'm going to leave it here. Some of these I put in here make me feel so old 😭
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Pizza Autism: the novella
Pizza Tower autism and/or ADHD headcanons go go go!!!!
warning there is. So much under the cut. I go off about everyone's tism
Peppino:
-Middle aged man autism. Ohh my god this guy is so autism we're starting off strong
-Most of his stims are physical and are probably. Not the most healthy (biting, banging wrists together, hair pulling etc)
-He has arfid frfr! Despite being a chef he's very careful about what he eats, however most italian foods are safe foods for him.
-Struggle showing empathy, even if he feels it. Yall saw how he reacted to Gerome mourning John he was out of his depth 😭
Gustavo:
-gnome autism.
-poor dude can't understand sarcasm to save his life. Also really bad at comprehending deeper meanings and stuff... Honestly me too Gustavo. Me too.
-actually gets overstimulated really easily. he grew up in a place similar to the gnome forest in the tower, where the air was always somewhat humid. If there's a dehumidifier running anywhere he can practically sense it and will immediately get upset bc he is too dry 💔
-His stims are mainly vocal (i.e. "I'm going to kill you") but he also likes to bounce on the balls of his feet and rock back and forth!
Mr Stick:
-French autism
-Hes not actually a huge asshole all the time, SURE he can be blunt and come off as rude but most of the time the mean persona is a mask. His really close friends know he's just a weird dude
-(stole this idea from Olympe) He is a routine lover!! Has his entire day planned out as soon as he wakes up. If you get in the way of his routine you will be turned into an ambiguous ball of meat. He was SOOOO pissed off when he got stuck in the tower bc it's wasn't in his routine so he robbed the whole damn place out of malice
-Innapropriate reactions to sensetive situations. If he had to comfort someone it would be Joever for him.
-Represses most stims because he thinks he's embarrassing. When in private though he'll spend ages examining textures and smelling paper (I do this all the time it's so fun). Occasionally when he's tired or comfortable he'll let out a high pitched squeak that noone can believe came from that middle aged man.
-I could go on with more. I love talking about this cunt.
Pepperman:
-Capsicum autism.
-Also has inappropriate reactions to things. Has no vocal control either half of the time he doesn't realize he's yelling
-Has a habit of chewing on/wanting to taste everything. Ate several wardrobes worth of Polly pocket clothes as a kid probs. Has to physically stop himself from giving his art supplies a taste. Occasionally eats an eraser still.
-If someone reorganizes his shit they WILL be killed this dude knows exactly where everything he needs is he has his own fucked up system
-Mainly uses stim toys. Has a collection of high end custom made ones but is too afraid of wearing them out so he chews on a toy dog bone instead and it's mangled to BITS
Vigilante:
-Cheese autism.
-This dude has know idea what autism actually is. He knows he's different compared to a lot of people, but he's never had the right word for it.
-Strong sense of justice. If something is wrong he WILL set it right. He got super upset when he realized Peppino wasn't actually an outlaw and he had tried to kill an innocent dude
-HATES HATES HATES processed foods. says he can taste the chemicals.
-Doesnt really stim in public. He'll tap his boot or spin the barrel of his gun if he gets really overstimulated but he much prefers to just pet some of his farm animals until he feels better
Noise:
-Rat autism!!
-This dude constantly needs to be overstimulated he loves it. If things are too quiet he gets super upset and starts bouncing off the walls and shit
-HATES the texture of carbonated drinks but forces himself to drink them because the flavour is worth it.
-Hes has like, three masks on at all times. There's the feral showbiz fella we all know and love, then beneath that is a more controlled businessman type, and beneath THAT is another, slightly less feral rat man.
-goes semi verbal sometimes. Everything just gets tangled up in his mind and he can't spit out the words he wants. He hates it when this happens during a show.
Noisette:
-Bunny autism!!!
-classic weirdgirl type. Would totally read warrior cats and roleplay as a cat on the playground as a kid.
-Also really bad with understanding emotions. You have to tell her specifically if she's upset you or something otherwise she just will not realize.
-makes a lot of vocal stims. Mainly just little beeps and stuff (I like to think she'd make that one jerma substitute teacher noise. Does anyone know what I'm talking about) Also loves to rock back and forth!!
-Has texture issues. She personally disposed of all the Sherpa fleece in the tower.
Fake peppino:
-autism supreme.
-like fr this dude is just the embodiment of autism. it eats vaccines to get more autistic/j
-cant understand when it's making someone upset. Actually, similar to Noisette, is bad at perceiving negative emotions overall.
-mirrors a lot. I mean that's like an integral part of their character. They mainly take after Peppino but will start acting like someone if he's around them long enough.
-melts into a puddle when overstimulated. Honestly? I wish I could do that too.
-Mainly mirrors stims from friends. It freaked everyone out when they started repeating Gustavo's catchphrase.
Pizzahead:
-PIZZA AUTISM!!!
-horrible moral compass this dude will do anything she wants and genuinely won't see what's wrong with it. Case in point the whole of pizza tower
-used to mask her true silly self a lot to be considered more 'normal' but decided normal ppl were boring as hell and dropped the charade
-arfid haver!! Loves pastries and breads and stuff, basically refuses to eat anything else. Has a personal vendetta against cantaloupe and has vowed to destroy it all bc he hates it soooo much
-taps his foot as a stim!! Also likes to jump around and the like, will rapidly shake their fists if incredibly excited
Gerome:
-Rock autism
-This guy loves his own company. Sure, he'll happily be social, but drops the mask as soon as he's alone. Just likes to be alone!
-Also not big on touch. The only person who's allowed to lay a finger on him is John, if anyone else just like. pats him on the back he will freeze up.
-loves being a janitor because the job is mostly repetitive. He cleans each floor in his own order, he has it all sorted out!
-loves bath bombs and stuff. Really likes the smells and just the fizz and the way they crumble in his fingers. Sometimes he'll just throw one in the sink and watch it for ages
-makes this weird clicking noise in the back of his throat as a stim. It's a rather unsettling noise but it's really the only way he stims in public. When alone he likes to feel textures of different things
John:
-hivemind autism!
-I feel bad for this dude man imagine having your being spread out through several different pocket dimensions and all of them have different textures and shot this poor bugger must've been overstimulated for years
-very blunt. Says what he wants with no remorse. Also doesn't have any volume control so often doesn't realize he's yelling
-I imagine when he was resurrected and was no longer a hivemind he had to take a long time alone just being himself. Duuuude imagine having to mask for YEARS because you were never ever alone I would lose my fucking marbles
-opposite of his brother, he doesn't understand personal space. Will often accidentally get I'm ppls faces because he doesn't realize how close he is to them. This also makes him somewhat clumsy and he has a habit of running into things
-Mainly has facial/expression stims. Will pull a big ol' grimace if something goes wrong and grin like an idiot when happy (see: when he got revived)
#Oh god. Tagging time.#pizza tower#peppino spaghetti#gustavo pizza tower#mr stick#MR STIIIIIIICK#pepperman#the vigilante#the noise#Noisette#Fake peppino#Pizzahead#gerome pizza tower#pillar john#Autism
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