#being 17

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Bengiyo's Queer Cinema Syllabus

For those who are not aware, I have decided to run the gauntlet of @bengiyo’s Queer Cinema Syllabus and have officially started Unit 2: Race, Disability, and Class. The films in Unit 2 are: The Way He Looks (2014), Being 17 (2016), Naz and Maalik (2015), The Obituary of Tunde Johnson (2019), Margarita With a Straw (2014), My Beautiful Laundrette (1985), Brother to Brother (2004), and Beautiful Thing (1996)

Today I will be writing about

Naz and Maalik (2015) dir. Jay Dockendorf

[Available on Amazon, Run Time- 1:24, Language: English]

Summary: Two closeted Muslim teens hawk goods across Brooklyn and struggle to come clean about their sexuality, as their secretive behavior leads them unknowingly into the cross-hairs of the War on Terror.

Cast: Kerwin Johnson Jr. as Naz Curtiss Cook Jr. as Maalik

__

Another great film down, and plenty more to go. I very deeply appreciate the authenticity of this film in the way it highlights religion and the shittiness of cops. 

I like that there is a kind of war against the older ways and the newer ways between Naz and Maaling. Naz appears to be much more religious than Maalik, he wears a kufi, he gives alms, he tries to pray five times a day. Not to say that Maalik isn’t religious, but he isn’t as hung up on what is and is not haram, he’s more comfortable in his sexuality, more willing to engage in PDA, but he’s less idealistic about the world. 

I love the hustle and grind we see from these boys, but even more so I love when they spend time alone together. I love how much time we get to see them goofing off, touching shoulders, flirting, racing, just having fun. I love how much time this film dedicates to showing how Naz and Maalik’s relationship works. How it could work. I love that in New York City they have so many shots dedicated to just the two of them, to the peace and quiet and light that follows them when they are together.

I love even more that they fight, that they are messy and complicated, and how much of that is driven not by themselves, but everyone else around them. This film takes place post 9/11, during the War on Terror. For those who are not aware, the War on Terror is/was a global counterterrorism military campaign following 9/11. And like I said, this film does some pretty decent realism, especially when it comes to the portrayal of the FBI agents that spend all day tailing Naz and Maalik because they have been #profiled. 

One of the main conflicts kicks off when an undercover cop tries to sell Naz and Maalik a gun. Maalik, trying to be funny, haggles for the weapon but does not end up buying it. But engaging in a joke like that is enough for this FBI agent to decide they should be followed. At which point, these two FBI agents essentially end up acting as voyeurs to Naz and Maalik’s secret love life. 

The FBI waits until each boy is alone and isolated to question them, and Maalik is completely honest while Naz, scared about his parents finding out about his sexuality, lies about where he had been the night before. Once again, I loved the portrayal of this, of two eighteen-year olds trying to navigate the system that was built to punish them. Not because I’m thrilled they are being harassed, but because I am appreciative of not being subject to propaganda about law enforcement and how “good” they are. 

I liked seeing the dichotomy between Naz and Maalik’s handling of the FBI agent, versus an older Black man handling questioning. How he’s trying his best not to give her any information, how he cites his right to not say anything to her without an attorney present. And in response he is treated with suspicion, the FBI agent tries pressing and pushing for more information, because that’s what cops do. 

And I remain unsurprised when the FBI agent pulls a gun on Naz when he reaches in to his bag. I think there are statements being made when the FBI agent is pissed at Naz and Maalik for “wasting her time” and that the boys are compelled to apologize for the inconvenience, despite the fact they were literally just existing as Black muslims and the FBI agent decided that not buying a gun was enough of a reason to tail them all day.

But it is those outside pressures, the concern that they will be outed, that they will be disowned, that they will lose everything that starts driving a wedge between Naz and Maalik. That Naz’s sister finds out and Naz is scared she’ll tell their parents. Those all start when the FBI starts questioning them, though there are multiple other forces at play.

Now. I think I wrote up a post after I watched Love of Siam, and how fucking furious I was that they ended that film on a separation. But that does not mean I hate separation narratives in queer cinema (I hated the one in LoS because I felt tricked). But Naz and Maalik separating at the end makes sense given their circumstances. There is no winning here. Naz is too kind to slaughter a chicken, Maalik feels compelled to show that he can do it, and Maalik ends up wounded and the chicken ends up dead without either of them laying a hand on it. There are repercussions here, a car accident, an injured person that could have been spared by just killing the chicken. I like that despite the fact that Naz and Maalik do have multiple fights in the film, it is not a fight that breaks them up. 

They both knew this was an inevitability, there aren’t hard feelings about it. It’s sad for both of them, but it happens almost casually. TI did find the ending of the movie very interesting. Because they chose to end it before Naz arrives home. Naz gets on the subway, sad about his separation with Maalik, scared about what is waiting for him at home, and he is stopped by the very same cop that tried to sell him a gun the other day. He is ticketed for riding his bike in the subway, and one of the last lines Naz has in the movie is something like “don’t I know you from somewhere?” 

Because no matter what, he’ll just never catch a fucking break. 

As an aside, I love how frequently homeless people are included in this film and how they are never regarded as scary or terrifying. One guy is mostly quiet and he either stares or sleeps. Another man is loud, rambunctious, and fucking funny. Naz and Maalik talk to a homeless woman, talk to some boys begging for money for medical treatment. I just love when homeless people are humanized, and I am glad that Naz and Maalik spends time focusing their lens on the people society often refuses to look at.

By/For/About Queers

Naz and Maalik is loosely based on an interview director Jay Dockendorf did with a closeted Muslim man that he sublet a room from. Dockendorf used this man’s life story as a jumping off point for his film. And it certainly feels like a film that is made for queer people, the way that it is structured. So ultimately, I think this is a gay trifecta.

Favorite Moment

My favorite moment is near the end of the film. Naz and Maalik have just made out and Naz has rejected the offer to take things further. Naz and Maalik lay in bed together, in just their boxers, and they read each other these shitty little poems that are attached to beanie babies that Naz acquired earlier in the film. I just love gay boys and their plushies, I’m a simple person. And once again considering that Ben created this syllabus to be a wind up to BLs, I think the plushie moment is worth noting because boys and their plushies is a recurring theme in a number of BLs. Teh and Oh have matching monster plushies in I Told Sunset About You. Bai Lang’s entire apartment is covered in plushies in My Tooth Your Love. Chinzilla keeps a plushie of a chinchilla on an alter in the music room in My School President. etc. etc. 

And I love plushies every time because I love seeing moments of softness portrayed on screen.

Favorite Line

“Barack Obama*. It’s crazy. It makes white men smell like black men, so white women will like black men more.”

*fake name of a scented oil

I mean…come on. It’s perfect.

Score

8.5/10

I think the story was pretty good, and there are these incredible bright spots of powerful acting. But the director allowed space for a lot of improv, which in some capacities I think is good. However, it does often result in awkward line deliveries, that tend to take me out of the story because the acting fluctuates so much between brilliant and smooth, to conscious and stilted.

[filmap]

Quand on a 17 ans / Being 17 André Téchiné. 2016

Mountains 1 Crabigles, 31110 Artigue, France See in map

See in imdb

[green-sky-garden]

[bitchardtheseventh]

being a teenager sucks because ure both the most interesting person ever or the most boring and u can't tell which is worse

[soliel-et-lune]

from Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

[missy-kitten]

Not to put a damper on 17 is the worst thing ever.....but I’d argue middle school is the true hell and worse than being 17.

less romanticizing high school more media about how being 17 is the worst human experience imaginable

[inbestigator]

Being 17 

[untitled849]

Being 17 讲的是 rejection。Thomas 拒绝了主角 Damien 的感情，并以暴力相对。大概 Damien 一直不断地继续是因为他相信 Thomas 是喜欢他的，可能是从他们的对视里面找到了一些共同点。我们没有看到 Damien 对暴力的痛苦，只看到他不断地去同样用暴力对待 Thomas。我觉得这里暴力其实是表达了他们对自己性别气质/身份的内化的讨厌和不安，这种感受其实照应的是他们开头画面所显示的外界学校和同侪对于他们性别气质/身份的排挤 – 他们在体育课上被篮球队排斥。而我们知道 Damien 对于 Thomas 是���欢的，他在搏斗的暴力中所表达的愤怒会让我认为他在发泄自己的一些好感和被霸凌、被冷落、被暴打的愤怒和恨。同时很有趣的是，Thomas 在搏斗中对 Damien 是照顾和怜爱的，而此时 Damien 也对于这种情感表达了排斥，因为他认为这是“施舍”，也就是他不相信 Thomas 真的对他有感情。我们可以镜像到 Thomas 的情感 – 他并没有直白体现他为���拒绝 Damien的情感，但是否他可能除了外化为暴力的不安、仇恨以外，也有害怕被“施舍”？在 Damien 在餐桌上醉醺醺地跟他表白之后，Thomas 开始吻 Damien，Damien 表达了被施舍的不满，而 Thomas 则 dismiss 了他的不安，而是告诉他自己对他的喜爱。

这并不是一个有希望的故事，即使在他们初夜之后，Thomas 依然在不适和不安中离开了 Damien。他们的隔阂在于他们的不安、讨厌被肆意投射到对方身上，暴力和拒绝会加深双方的恐惧和距离。结尾出现了 Thomas 在某一天主动去走长长的山路去找 Damien，然后他们相吻。但对我来说，这更像一个遥远的梦幻。

[dirtflunk]

The Original Kin If I Am Being Honest

[leafyeyes417]

Danny is glad he actually made a plan for once. Jazz had been on his back about telling their parents he was Phantom, and he had managed to convince her he had a plan. The only thing that would extend how long it took was the frequency of ghost attacks.

He generally didn’t have much free time, so luckily Clockwork was willing to put him in a time bubble so he could get stuff done, like get enough sleep. But mostly he was training. Sometimes with Wulf to make portals, but other ghosts had come by too.

The power that was giving him the most trouble, and that he needed most for his plan was duplication. It took forever and he still couldn’t have more than 3 versions of himself at one time. How Vlad managed so many he had no idea.

Anyway back to his plan. He got all his stuff that he couldn’t afford to lose hidden away, got copies of all his parents blueprints and files, replaced items that he didn’t feel comfortable letting them keep if worse case scenario came, and a few more miscellaneous things.

He decided not to tell Sam and Tucker what he was doing. Though he did give them a mysterious file that they weren’t able to open yet. It would lead them to him later. But he needed their reactions to be legitimate, even if he hated having to potentially distress them for a bit.

He then sent his duplicate in his place back home while he went to the Ghost Zone to keep learning and keep an eye on things. Hopefully things went well, but he planned to spend a full living realm month here just in case his parents faked taking it well.

————————————————————————

It did not go well. About two weeks after his duplicate told his parents they knocked him out and buried him in a ghost proof coffin. Was he glad he wouldn’t have to experience his worse fears as a lab experiment? Yes. Was he still going to have nightmares of being trapped underground unable to escape? Also yes.

He was glad it was his duplicate though. It was easy for him to undo from a distance and since they had been connected he still had all the memories. He typed in the code for the file he gave his friends before he left. Time to go to Gotham, the one place he was able to wheedle out of Clockwork would be best for him.

[dragonpyre]

It's canon (to me) that Jason Todd has a baby face

Commission info ko-fi

[wen-kexing-apologist]

Bengiyo's Queer Cinema Syllabus

For those who are not aware, I have decided to run the gauntlet of @bengiyo’s Queer Cinema Syllabus and have officially started Unit 2: Race, Disability, and Class. The films in Unit 2 are: The Way He Looks (2014), Being 17 (2016), Naz and Maalik (2015), The Obituary of Tunde Johnson (2019), Margarita With a Straw (2014), My Beautiful Laundrette (1985), Brother to Brother (2004), and Beautiful Thing (1996)

Today I will be writing about

Being 17 (2016) dir.  André Téchiné

[Available on Amazon Prime, Runtime: 1:54, Language- French]

Summary: Damien lives with his mother Marianne, a doctor, while his father is on a tour of duty abroad. He is bullied by Thomas, whose mother is ill. The boys find themselves living together when Marianne invites Thomas to come and stay with them. (from IMDB)

Cast Sandrine Kiberlain as Dr. Marianne Delille Kacey Mottet Klein as Damien Delille Corentin Fila as Thomas Chardoul

___

There is something I desperately love in film and television that I certainly do not talk about enough, and that is when an object or a setting acts as a character within a story (i.e. the Poor Boy shirt in Only Friends or Wilson in Castaway). While I have a background in technical theater and I am a slut for lighting design especially, I have realized over the past few months of writing immense amounts of media analysis that I never really set out in watching a show with a particular technical element in mind to discuss (by which I mean I did not go in to movie with the intention of paying attention to the costume design and discussing it’s significance). But in Being 17 what very quickly became apparent to me was the weather, the landscape, and coming out the other end of this film, the weather felt like a character all on it’s own. 

The film begins and all we see on screen is white, snow covered mountains, minimal dialogue, just the sound of snow crunching beneath feet, sniffles from runny noses, etc. During the entire first trimester of Thomas and Damien’s school year there is snowfall for as far as the eye can see. I recognize this is probably a strange place for me to start in writing up my thoughts on this film, but I am working my way through the Race, Disability, and Class Unit of the syllabus right now, so I think paying attention to setting is vitally important. Especially for this film, because Thomas is Black, Thomas is poor, and Thomas is the adoptive son of a white couple.

Personally, I don’t think the movie does a deep dive in to the subject of race, but that does not mean that conversations about race do not exist in the film. I just see them being placed there more subtly. In the way that the only thing our eye can differentiate in the vast blanket of thick, white snow, is a backlit, black silhouetted figure trudging across the screen. Thomas is the only Black person in his family, Thomas goes to a school with very few people of color, Thomas gets invited to stay with Damien’s family who are also all white. And I loved that in the beginning of this story, when Thomas is reserved, withdrawn, aggressive, and self-isolating that there is almost no place that he can go to escape whiteness. The whiteness at school, the whiteness at home, the whiteness at Damien’s, the whiteness outside. 

And literally just now as I was writing that up I realized that there is one place that Thomas frequents in the movie, especially when there is still snow on the ground, and that is a lake at the top of a mountain, where the water is black.

Anyway, I say all this because the weather in this film is a character to me, a physical manifestation of the feelings between Thomas and Damien. In the first trimester, in the winter, the feelings Thomas has for Damien are ice cold (or at least appear that way). Damien and Thomas are actively hostile to one another, Thomas especially initiates a number of fights between himself and Damien (oh the intricate rituals that allow men to touch the skin of other men). Damien recites poetry in class and Thomas trips him, Thomas can’t solve a math equation and Damien insults him, if they are in the same space for more than thirty seconds blows will be exchanged. 

We learn in the first trimester that Thomas’ mother is sick, that he lives up in the mountains on a farm and travels three hours round trip to get to school, we learn that his mother is pregnant, and that Thomas is a consolation child. I love how much subtlety there is in this film, how much a single line can reveal so much about a character’s behavior. Soon after Thomas learns of his mother’s pregnancy, he is talking with his father about all the failed pregnancies that had happened before Thomas. Thomas asks his father “If she had [birthed a child], I wouldn’t be here?” to which his father, smiling, light hearted, and jokingly says yes. Yes, if Thomas’ mother had had her own biological child, then they would not have adopted Thomas. The line is delivered, the actors react in such a way that an audience might not see the emotional impact, until the scene cuts to Thomas sitting in bed, staring out the window. 

Tom’s mom goes to the hospital, and Dr. Delille suggests that Thomas come and stay with her and Damien for a while. The reasoning is that Thomas is falling behind in school, he has a long commute, he works the farm at night. It is very difficult for him to concentrate on his studies. The Delille family lives closer to the school, they are close to the hospital where Thomas’ mother is staying. Thomas wants to be a vet, he knows that the more his grades slip the slimmer the chance that he can make it to vet school. But he is incredibly resistant to the idea of staying at the Delilie’s, saying he loves the mountains, he wants to be able to help take care of the farm, and despite the fact that these are both generally true for him, you can see and understand exactly why Thomas is pushing so hard to stay at the farm. He has heard mere days ago that a successful pregnancy of his mother’s would have resulted in him never being adopted, and now here is a pregnancy that is seemingly going well, and his parents are suggesting he move away from home and go stay with another family.

I want to make it clear, this is not a conscious or insidious effort on his parents’ part to get rid of Thomas, they genuinely want him to stay at the Delille’s because they believe being closer to school, and having a smart adult around to help with homework questions will help get Thomas’ grades up. But we know that is where Thomas’ mind is wandering because he makes a half-joking comment to Dr. Delille about it: “Finally, a real child,” and to Dr. Delille’s credit, she does not let that comment just skate by, telling Thomas “there are no fake children.” 

Now that Thomas and Damien are living under the same roof and have been forced by Damien’s mom to call a truce to their constant fighting, they are starting to tolerate each other, to get along, to be able to share space. And when they do want to fight, they make a plan. Thomas picks a time and place, and both of them drive in the same car to the middle of the woods to fight each other. Rain falls, and they pause their fight to retreat to a cave for shelter, sharing a cigarette after they just beat the shit out of each other. [It is here where Ben’s voice popped in my head with his commentary on how boys fight, get it out of their system, and then are chilling with each other very soon after they’ve fought. This is a very accurate depiction of that observation from Ben.]

Thomas takes Damien to the lake he hikes to in the middle of the night, and wouldn’t you know it, Thomas and Damien sharing more about themselves, growing closer to become friends, happens at the same time that the snow begins to melt. The warmer months are approaching, and so too is Damien and Thomas’ relationship beginning to warm up. 

With less pressure on him, more time to study, and a shorter commute, Thomas’ grades start to improve, and one of my favorite scenes in the movie is when Thomas’ teacher tells the whole class he got the highest grade, and Thomas is trying to hide his smile. I love that this film takes the time to show that Thomas does actually really care about school. That he cares about his grades. And I think adjacent to that, it adds additional weight to Thomas’ initial refusal to leave his parents due to his fear of being replaced. Damien starts his gay awakening, at which point we get a “I don’t know if I am in to guys or just you” moment.

And it is at that point I remember this whole syllabus is a warm up to BL, which makes me much more tolerant of the passing gay for you trope. (That said, considering the number of posters of men Damien has in his room, I think he is definitely queer). At the place in the story where Damien says this to Tom, there have been zero conversations about Damien’s growing feelings for Thomas. So, props to him for just coming right out and saying it. But with that comment spoken, the summer months are approaching. All the ice has melted, we start moving towards lighter clothing, fewer layers, and well, wouldn’t you know it the boys are getting along.

Where before Thomas would never be caught dead in the same space as Damien, even walking on opposite sides of the street to go back to Damien’s house so it didn’t seem like they were together. Now, they are sitting next to each other in class, they are acknowledging each other’s presence, they are talking and smiling, where everyone can see them. The weather is warm, the ice is gone, and the boys are sharing awkward, quick, exploratory, and messy kisses that bring Thomas’ internalized homophobia to the surface. 

Thomas hits Damien, is expelled from school, is made to return to his home in the mountains, and he stays there until Damien’s father dies, and Thomas’ own father drags his sorry ass out of the house and makes him go to the funeral. Damien’s mom spirals in to a major depressive episode, and Thomas is the first person to drag her out of the house, and to get her outside. He takes her to the mountains, the mountains that he loves, and they get out of the car and they are surrounded by fog. 

Which, again, on the subject of weather being a character, the weather being reflective of the emotional state of the characters. Thomas is a child, taking care of an adult, an adult who has just lost the love of her life, and who cannot see the sunlight through the clouds. Thomas wants to show Dr. Delille something beautiful, but she can’t see it yet. Thomas moves back in to the Delille’s house to help Damien take care of his mother. She steadily improves, the sunlight returns to the mountains and there is greenery as far as the eye can see. Things are bright, and colorful, and rich just in time for Thomas to get cool with his feelings for Damien, and fuck him. 

And, god the sex scene was cringey in the best possible way. The fact that I recoiled at Damien using his spit as lube, and Thomas just inserting his penis in to Damien’s asshole without any prep, I was like, “if you’re gonna show cock and balls, why are you showing such irresponsible- oh yeah, they are literally seventeen year olds having gay sex for the first time” which makes it work quite well for me. 

By/For/About

I would put this somewhere between By and About Queers or By, For, and About Queers I think. Fun Fact though, the title, Being 17 came from a 1870 French poem called ‘Roman’ by Arthur Rimbaud, who was a gay man.

Favorite Moment

My favorite moment is after Damien’s dad’s funeral, Thomas finds Damien practicing on a punching bag. Thomas who at this point has run from his feelings for Damien, head butted Damien after Damien kissed him, and had initially refused to go to the funeral says “I’m with you, for your Dad,” which results in Damien sobbing in to Thomas’ arms. Which is glorious on its own, but to follow it up with them having to pry themselves apart from on another because Dr. Delille has walked outside, to follow her together, and then have to physically manhandle her and bring her back inside their house so she didn’t injure herself was just so expertly done. Full of love and tragedy, and was equal parts beautiful and heartbreaking to witness.

Favorite Line

“They tell me things will get better. I know they’ll get better. I even hope so. But I also know that I won’t have accepted his death then. I’ll just have forgotten he died.”

If I had seen this movie a month ago, it is likely that I would have had a different favorite line. But as it so happens there has been a surprising amount of death happening inside and on the outskirts of my life recently, so these lines just hit different.

Score

9/10, it was a little slow for my tastes and it did not capture me emotionally the way some of the other films I've seen so far have, but it was all very well done, especially considering that it was filmed in 8 weeks.

[obsob]

love is stored in the parallel play

[thebrainrotsreal]

Drew this real quick because I fucking love these two so much ???? Especially Bee. I wish they interacted more so badly. PLEASE.

Also learning how to draw these guys.. slowly.

[therealcallmekd]

Now THAT'S Thinkin' In 3D!

HHEHEHEE HAH FLATLAND FANART BE UPON YE

[magnificent-winged-beast]

November 5th first Aid Kit

I'm recently unemployed, but I only can think It's November 4 and yet, I feel unprepared for tomorrow.