#been a bit unwell about them recently
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The lyrics here are from IFHY by Tyler the creator and Cellophane by FKA twigs (though it could just as easily be the muppets version lol)
#maccadams#idw tarantulas#idw prowl#taraprowl#prowl x tarantulas#been a bit unwell about them recently#they are so toxic#its truly something to behold#my art#doodle dump
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It's been over a decade but Clear's moles are still to this day peak character design. He's an robot guy appearing the exact same as his brothers – except for those moles. They're so good. And being right next to Clear's mouth they're in such a tenderly kissable spot. If I was put into Aoba's place my favorite activity would be gently cupping clear's face and kissing his moles and forehead and the tip of his nose and i think i lost the plot here but i just think clear's neat and pretty and i miss him
#im having emotions about him. i have 2 posts of clear and aoba in my drafts waiting until im stable#enough about him to write them down#one of them does require me to replay his re:connect route though#anyways i think moles are peak character design always#when i was in elementary school the other class in my grade had this guy who i thought was the most beautiful boy#to have ever lived and he had so many moles on his face and he was so beautiful and they just added to it#i saw him at a gricery store recently and he was still beautiful#also a jump scare bc i always forget a LOT of ppl from my hometown end up living in the city i live in now#bc its the closest big city to it#anyways. i love clear so much. ive been thinking about him recently. hes so. wahh#also im thinking about what i love to call the aoba proximity image#which is when the whole gang is at the bottom of the oval tower#and it shows everyones personalities and relationship towards aoba so well it makes me a bit unwell#leevi talks
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Under The Weather
Zayne came to visit you when you were unwell, and turned out, you were not the only one who needed special care.
── .✦ Zayne x Female Reader|MC
♡︎. Tags: fluff, sweet, soft domestic fluff, tender loving care, established relationship, sickness, seasonal flu and usage of medication.
♡︎. Word count: ~1k
── .✦ Masterlist ♡ Request a fic - currently closed.
In a dreaming state, you woke up at midday. The doorbell rang, and you had to force yourself to move your painful, fatigued body.
Zayne was waiting for you outside. At that moment, you immediately recalled something really important.
You had stood Zayne up.
That Saturday morning was supposed to be your date at the cinema with Zayne. But in the early morning, you had a fever and ultimately fell asleep. You turned to look at the wall clock inside the room and felt even more guilty.
Zayne, though, remained silent. Just by looking at your current state, he could tell why you did not show up at the cinema. The first thing he did after entering your flat was take your temperature.
“S-Sorry, Zayne…” You mumbled while he got you some medication. “But… How was the movie?”
"I don't know." His voice echoed from the kitchen, where he was pouring a cup of water.
“Huh?… Didn't you watch it?”
Zayne appeared in front of you. In one hand he carried a few pills, and in the other a glass of warm water. He spread both of them in front of you, bending down slightly to be within your reach on the sofa.
“I bought two tickets. If I only used one, the remaining would feel very lonely.”
Despite your feeble grin, it seemed as though a bit more life had been infused into the flower that was your heart.
“Sorry that I made you wait…” You replied after taking the medication. All of a sudden, you could picture Zayne sitting by himself at the cinema, two tickets in hand, soft drinks and popcorn beside him. You were filled with guilt. You felt so guilty. “You can just call me next time, if something like this happens again.”
“I did make a call.”
"Huh? I don't remember receiving any call..."
You quickly found the phone on the table and turned it on. There were dozens of calls and messages from Zayne with no response. You must have fallen deep asleep, as you did not know anything.
Zayne lowered himself in front of you with one knee bent on the floor. He looked up at you, his hand gently ruffled your hair.
“"It's fortunate that you didn't get yourself into any trouble scarier than a fever.”
You grinned. Zayne treated you with gentleness as always. Even when you had stood him up, he did not get angry and came to your place to take care of you. All of a sudden, you were dying to kiss him. Yet when you softly closed your eyes and leaned towards his direction, your nose started to itch, causing you to sneeze violently and collapsing into Zayne instead.
He held you in his arms, caressing your soft hair. Just as you were about to sneeze again, Zayne snatched up a tissue from the table and carefully put it to your nose. Your hair was disheveled and your whole face reddened. You were still in your jammies with snowmen on them. You were so embarrassed to let him see you looking that unkempt. Zayne, though, only gave you a soft stroke on the face, saying that you should rest some more. He would take care of lunch. You drifted off into another dream right after Zayne carried you back to the bedroom.
When you woke up, he had finished preparing porridge and a light meal. Since you still wanted to make it up to Zayne for that movie both of you had missed that morning, you suggested another one at home. You curled up on the sofa, leaning against him. Remembering what he had mentioned during the meal earlier that there had been a seasonal flu epidemic in Linkon recently, you quickly rose up and moved far away from him, all the way to the other side of the sofa. Zayne rolled his eyes at you, wondering why you were acting so strange.
“I don't want to give Doctor Zayne my flu…” You clarified.
Zayne smiled, shaking his head slightly. He gradually moved towards you until you were both sitting side by side like earlier.
“I have a strong immune system. I am capable of taking care of you in every way without becoming sick."
Undoubtedly, you took Zayne's word for it and allowed him to look after you for the next few days. However, by the time you recovered, he was the one to get sick.
“I thought Doctor Zayne was so confident about his immune system.” While taking his temperature, you could not resist teasing him more.
Zayne lay on the bed without responding. His nose tip was red from excessive sneezing, and his body was heated from a fever. You took the opportunity to poke his cheek several times. His face reddened even more, and he appeared uneasy while lying still. Doctor Zayne seldom became so submissive and tolerated your bothering him to this extent.
You assisted him in taking his medication and urge him to get more rest.
“You should… go home… I'll be fine again tomorrow…” Zayne said.
"I'm not leaving. You caught the flu from me, didn't you? It is now my responsibility to take care of you until you fully recover!"
Zayne met your determined gaze. He smiled softly.
“Heal me then, Doc-tor.”
You leaned down, about to kiss him, but Zayne quickly put a hand on his lips to stop you.
“That is... not something we can do right now…”
You grimaced before giving his knuckles a tender kiss.
"So you have to make it up to me later once you get better, Doctor Zayne," you said.
#love and deepspace#fanfic#fanfiction#oracleofstars#heart hunters series#zayne#rei#li shen#doctor zayne#dr zayne#zayne x you#zayne x mc#zayne x reader#lnds#lnds zayne#lnds x reader#lnds x you#lnds fanfic#lnds fluff#lads x you#lads x reader#lads x mc#lads zayne#l&ds zayne#l&ds x reader#l&ds x you#l&ds fluff#l&ds fic#lads fanfic#lads fluff
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ballad of lovebirds and puppy dogs | lando norris social media au
pairing: lando norris x fem actress!reader
face claim: rachel zegler
everyone is a hunger games fan, even if you say you're not a hunger games fan you are. this includes lando norris.
based on this request: could you please do a lando norris smau with rachel zegler as the fc!! where the ballad of songbirds and snakes recently came out, twitter could be freaking out over it, and then someone spots her with lando or something!! take it from there queen that’s just my like base plot‼️‼️ - @inejghafawifesblog
MASTERLIST | BUY ME A KO-FI?
yourusername
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liked by tomblyth, landonorris and 1,231,866 others
tagged: tomblyth
yourusername: kinda have a movie coming out, have yall seen it?
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user1: ANNOUNCE RELATIONSHIP NOW
user2: friendships can exist between men and women you know?
user3: look at her holding his arm though that shit ain't platonic
hunterschafer: my favourite girl in the whole world
yourusername: that's crazy because you're my favourite girl in the whole world too
hunterschafer: crazy when that happens huh
tomblyth: does that mean i'm your favourite man in the whole world
yourusername: my lawyer said i can't answer this question
tomblyth: god you get a boyfriend and all of a sudden i don't mean shit
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tomblyth: does our frolicks in the woods mean nothing to you?
user4: WE SAW THAT GRANDPA
user5: sooooo. there is a man.
user6: and it's not tom :( so disappointing their chemistry was insane
user7: babe that's called acting
user8: lando norris in the likes i knew my man had TASTE
user9: i knew there was a reason i liked that man
f1gossipandtea
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liked by user13, user14 and 12,309 others
tagged: yourusername, landonorris
f1gossipandtea: lando norris was spotted multiple times out in monaco with y/n y/ln !! this comes after his appearance at the premiere of her new film the ballad of songbirds and snakes. do you think they're a cute couple?
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user15: try not to say parents challenge (impossible)
user16: has someone looked into my brain and pulled out my dream threesome and made them a couple
user17: i need them to give me a chance for real
user18: i am defo anti-paparazzi but thank you for these absolute gems xx
user19: those motherfuckers must've been camped out cause literally got the whole itinerary
user20: this feels like such a random couple but after watching the BTS of tbosas they defo have very similar personalities
user21: i did a lil bit of sleuthing and tom has posts of him at races? so do we think he suggested lando? or showed him to y/n?
user22: i also had a wee look and y/n follows basically all of the grid and a couple of the retired drivers so that tells me she likes the sport? like if she just liked lando surely she'd only follow him and maybe some of his friends?
user23: so like my vision is y/n y/ln either performing or singing the national anthem at one of the american races
user24: someone get this gal in the fia stat
user25: who is this girl? she's too irrelevant for lando ...
user26: and who are YOU? he's not going to pick you girly
user27: she's in the top film in the world for weeks now ... let's not be silly
landonorris
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liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 1,833,209 others
tagged: yourusername
landonorris: what the paps didn't get ...
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user28: screaming, crying, throwing up i did not know i needed this so much
user29: i am so unwell this is so cute
user30: i was so on the y/n and tom train but i am happy to say it has been hijacked by lando
yourusername: paps didn't get our good angles :(
landonorris: i'd like to keep the best angles to ourselves
yourusername: no for real, for MY eyes only
maxfewtrell: god you people are obnoxious...
landonorris: you literally told me to stop complaining about being lonely and now i'm being attacked 🤨
maxfewtrell: NOT LIKE THIS THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE
yourusername: fuck them kids
landonorris: what y/n said
danielricciardo: free enchante promotion, y/n you're invited to my wedding
yourusername: the girlfriend effect x enchante goes crazy tbf
landonorris: are you saying i didn't dress well?
yourusername: you either didn't dress well or can't pack for shit you came to GEORGIA IN THE SUMMER WITH A SUITCASE FULL OF HOODIES
landonorris: but that's my brand :(
georgerussell63: the twitch quartet formally announce our disappointment about finding out about this relationship via @f1gossipandtea, we expect a big apology and perhaps and visit from tom
tomblyth: i am THERE
yourusername: eh i think that's on lando .... but real question is who follows @f1gossipandtea
georgerussell63: me duh, i need to check for potential GDPA incidents
alexalbon: i also follow it 👍 no real reason i just like the drama thanks @charles_leclerc and @carlossainz55
yourusername: LMAO
charles_leclerc: i am disappointed in you lando. ALEX WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN
carlossainz55: ???
landonorris: lol would you have even believed me ?
georgerussell63: no
alexalbon: no
charles_leclerc: no
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liked by hunterschafer, landonorris and 1,339,309 others
tagged: landonorris
yourusername: some cheeky behind the scenes pics, including lando demanding to be pampered while i was in hair and make up
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user31: i hope lando can fight (i have brass knuckles on, sorry not sorry)
landonorris: UMMMM ???
yourusername: soz babe they're just passionate
user32: HE WAS ON SET? HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING?
landonorris: how dare you !! the makeup girlies LOVE ME
yourusername: sure, if that's what you wanna believe
landonorris: they liked me better than you they said so :p
yourusername: they were just being nice i told them you're fragile
landonorris: i am NOT FRAGILE I AM SOFT THERE IS A DIFFERENCE
user33: okay now i get them 100%
maxverstappen1: so this is why you didn't play fifa with me 🤨
oscarpiastri: so this is why you abandoned me at the airport 🤨
danielricciardo: so this is why you blocked me after i called you seven times in a row it was an emergency you ASSHOLE 🤨
carlossainz55: so this is why you've ditched golf dates the last couple months 🤨
alexalbon: so this is why you didn't come to watch tbosas with me and lily 🤨
georgerussell63: so this is why the GDPA chat was muted on your phone 🤨
yourusername: i ain't reading alla that, i'm happy for you or i'm sorry that happened, i'll see you all in the parking lot at the vegas gp
landonorris: ...sorry?
user34: Y/N IS GOING TO THE VEGAS GP?
maxfewtrell: actually could you have him more often?
landonorris: AHAHAHAA :(
yourusername: gladly :)
landonorris: :)
f1
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tagged: landonorris
f1: lando's new helmet for vegas... we wonder where this inspiration came from?
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user38: IS THAT A BALLAD OF SONGBIRDS AND SNAKES HELMET
user39: maybe men do deserve rights
landonorris: the ballad of songbirds and snakes is out in cinemas everywhere now !!
yourusername: i knew they should've given you a cameo
landonorris: THERE WAS A CHANCE OF THAT?
yourusername: no, but it would've been funny tho
landonorris: don't get me excited like that :(
danielricciardo: maybe you could have a cameo in snow white, you are what the kids call a short king... sorry
yourusername: LMAO
landonorris: can we stop bullying me on my special post :(
yourusername: sorry babe, i love you and i love your helmet, thank you xxx
landonorris: THANK YOU :)))))
maxverstappen1: so you're telling me i sat through whatever the fuck that opening ceremony was when you could've had y/n perform the whole time?
yourusername: new agent incoming?
landonorris: I KNEW YOU WATCHED THE FILM
maxverstappen1: i am a supportive friend?
landonorris: you didn't even know her?
maxverstappen1: i saw you at the premiere, went through your instagram, saw you only followed her, put two and two together, went to see the film because we're friends by proxy now 👍
yourusername: i am scared and impressed
landonorris: fine... that's kinda cute
user40: okay soz i love this relationship and all the friendships starting
user41: okay but @yourusername who is winning the games
yourusername: fernando or valterri they scare me
fernandoalo_oficial: compliment!
valterribottas: i'll take it
landonorris
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liked by maxfewtrell, yourusername and 1,723,990 others
tagged: yourusername
landonorris: i wanted to impress her :( she's a lot better at her day job
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user46: (i'm glad he's okay) lando really was the 'this one is for you babe' and misses meme this weekend
landonorris: not wrong
yourusername: GET OFF YOUR PHONE AND STOP TALKING DOWN TO YOURSELF
user47: currently picturing y/n whisper yelling positive affirmations at lando
yourusername: yes !! baby boy is way too hard on himself and NOT on my watch
landonorris: :)))
yourusername: you did so well this weekend, i loved watching you do what you love - don't be too hard on yourself !!
landonorris: i just wanted to do your helmet proud :(
yourusername: i am more than proud
landonorris: can you sing to me in your country accent again?
yourusername: of course
maxverstappen1: is this a kink?
landonorris: 1. no it's not a kink 2. ASK ME IF I'M OKAY BEFORE YOU TRY TO KINK SHAME ME
maxverstappen1: you're actually spelling even better maybe a concussion was what you needed
yourusername: TOO SOON MAX
maxverstappen1: did you just send me a picture of lando pouting
yourusername: yes ! say sorry now !!!!!
maxverstappen1: fine. i'm sorry lando. i'm glad you aren't hurt and that you don't have a country accent fetish
user48: are these the new terror trio?
yourusername
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liked by alexalbon, landonorris and 1,552,589 others
tagged: landonorris
yourusername: don't listen to this bozo, he's the most talented boy in the world
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user49: THEY HAVE A CHILD?
user50: that's a dog...
yourusername: just because i didn't birth him, doesn't mean mr. fluffy isn't my biological child
landonorris: i'm not a step dad i'm the dad who stepped up 🆙
tomblyth: tom blyth erasure
yourusername: boo you whore
tomblyth: ermmm EXCUSE ME?
yourusername: lando appreciation post must be mean to all other men, sorry !!
tomblyth: understandable, continue.
landonorris: the most talented??? coming from you??? this is high praise
yourusername: and you BETTER take it
landonorris: yes ma'am
maxverstappen1: is this another kink?
landonorris: MAX?
maxverstappen1: it's winter break i'm bored and you have a GIRLFRIEND so i can't terrorise you in person :(
yourusername: attempt to kink shame us one more time and i'm sending mr fluffy at your ankles
yourusername: fuck it i'll send ankle biter yuki in as well
yukitsunoda0511: i'll do it
yourusername: @landonorris i see why he's your favourite now
landonorris: yuki-san!! can we give mr. fluffy a brother?
yukitsunoda0511: i love you guys but i see you way too much as it is
yourusername: harsh crowd
landonorris: at least you have me?
yourusername: TRUE
user51: my life pre and post y/nxlando was so vastly different - i love them
note: thank you for the request !! i have been swamped with work... and recovering from my birthday weekend. i hope you enjoyed it!! i love the hunger games and i can't wait to see tbosas !!
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#lando norris insta au#lando norris x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris#the ballad of songbirds and snakes
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The Water's Embrace ch. 7
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Summary: You and Silco talk about recent events happening within your friend group before one simple act has everything exploding in your faces.
Content: female reader, gendered terms, pre-season 1 arcane, young Vander, young Silco, young Sevika, young reader, young Felicia, young Connol, Nadia & Nikolai are Viktor's parents, silco POV, fear of rejection/ruining friendship, rejection, reader has water manipulation, smoking, slight Arcane season 2/League of Legends spoiler (Janna, Felicia & Connol)
Word Count: 5.9K
Tag List: @miffysoo , @teriyakiitae
A/N: So.....that series finale.....how we feeling about it? I'm feeling unwell SOB. Anywayy here is the next chapter and I hope you all enjoy!!
↞ to The Water's Cold Embrace Masterlist | Request Rules | Blog Navigation ↠
Three years later
“Felicia’s pregnant!” You gaped at Silco from where he sat on the edge of the small pool of water you swam in. It was a pool located in the cave you once called home, though nothing but a rotting, makeshift bed remained of that past. Even Janna had left this place.
You had noticed she hadn’t been around much for a year. A long time for her to be away at sea…if she was even out at sea at all.
To say her disappearance didn’t worry you would be a lie. She may be an emotionless wind spirit but she was still the thing that had raised you. You still found love for her in your heart.
You ducked under the surface of the inky black waters, swimming forward till you popped up at the edge of the pool. Silco unbent his legs from his chest only to criss cross them, making it easier to lean closer to you and your utter shock.
“Shocking, right?” Silco's seafoam eyes tracked you as you placed your arms on the stone floor beside him.
“Shocking is quite the understatement.” You let your feet kick aimlessly through the waters, enjoying the feel against your skin. It’d been too long since you’d been swimming like this. “She--with who? Connol?” Silco nodded.
“It would seem.”
“Damn… damn .” Silco nodded in agreement. “What--I mean--I’m happy for her.” Silco raised an eyebrow at you.
“Are you?” He teased.
“ Yes .” You huffed back. “I’m just…worried.” Silco again nodded.
“Yes…as am I.” You scooted closer to him then. “She made us promise to make Zaun a reality for her child.”
“And it will become reality.” You confirmed only for Silco to sigh deeply.
“It’s been years .” He murmured. “We’ve continued to let Piltover stomp all over us. We are no closer to freedom let alone Zuan.”
“You’re giving up?” Silco leveled you with a fierce look.
“Hardly. I’m just tired of waiting and waiting for the “right moment”.” You hesitated before placing your hand on his knee, rubbing your thumb over the fabric. Silco’s eyes tracked the touch before they found yours again.
“I know we’ve all been patient for a long while, but I think we need to be patient a bit longer. Especially now that Felicia is expecting.” Your mind went down a dark train of thought. Of the reality that pregnancies down here so rarely made it to full term. To the reality that, even if her child was born safe and sound, it could kill her. To the reality of just how little food there truly was to go around and how babies were such fragile things that had a tendency to die before they reached the age of one. “We don’t want to stress her more than I’m sure she is now.”
Silco nodded, eyes darkening in those very same thoughts you had just had. He placed his hand over yours, turning it so that it would rest in his palm.
“Do you--” Silco began but seemed to think better of it. You gave his hand a squeeze, pulling yourself further on land to peer more closely into his eyes.
“Do I…? Come on, don’t hold back on me now.” Silco looked over your face slowly. A slowness he had been doing a lot more recently. Not that you minded. You quite liked his attention but it still didn’t help you in your mission to keep your feelings for him smothered.
“Do you wish for children?” You blinked up at him. And blinked again. And again.
“Me? Have…a kid?” Silco shrugged.
“Just curious. We’ve never talked about such things before.” A pinkish hue began to spread over his cheeks. A pinkish color you had missed seeing on him.
“Well, I’ve never really thought about it before. I…really didn’t think I’d make it this far in my life.” Silco smoothed his thumb over the back of your hand in a comforting manner that had you fluttering your feet in the water a bit more. “And not to mention I would be a horrid mother.” Silco scoffed.
“Hardly. You are great with kids.”
“What kids have you seen me interact with?”
“Those kids you helped get away from those enforcers.” You thought back to that day which had happened a year ago. All because a few of them had stolen something for some Topside douchebag. It seemed to give those enforcers some grand idea to not only ruin a perfectly nice day, but to invade the stream and connecting lake kids went to swim around in and use unnecessary force to find the little thieves.
You had been working when it started. Had only showed up because you had been… called there by some tug you still didn’t know what it was. Some tug that felt too much like magic. You’d gotten there just in time to find enforcers trying to drown some of them, others getting dragged away and beaten up, and others trembling in fear looking like they were praying to some god that you knew wouldn’t show up to help them.
You just assumed it had something to do with your magic and their connection to the waters the enforcers were using to try to harm the children with, so you stepped in and ended it.
Of course, you didn’t tell any of your friends that.
Not even Silco, who knew of your magic and who you practically told everything to.
You just told them you had left work early because you were feeling unwell and stumbled upon the scene by accident.
You tried to call out to Janna afterward to see if she knew what that--that calling had been but she had never shown and was nowhere to be found. It was then you first figured out she was missing. Had been missing for a while before.
“They don’t count.” You quickly said.
“Why?”
“Because I hardly even spoke to them,” A lie. They had tried to talk your ear off afterward about your magic, but Silco didn’t need to know that. “And because I said so.” Silco huffed.
“Fine. It doesn’t matter because I’ve seen you interact with Viktor and you do so very well.” You chuckled, a smile blooming at the thought of that kid.
“Viktor is a sweet thing. Only reason I’m good with him. Most kids are like you and I were. Bad-mouthed little ankle biters.” A smile pulled at Silco’s lips.
“I suppose you're right.” You both huffed and chuckled at the thought of your younger years.
“What about you?” You asked as your amusement died out. “Do you want a kid?” Silco fell quiet for a long while. You saw a thousand and one thoughts rush behind his seafoam eyes.
“You have.” You beamed, pulling your hand from his only so you could plant it on the ground, pulling yourself further upward, now at eye level with the very much blushing Silco. “Oh tell me about it, pretty please.” Silco almost seemed to lean away from your eagerness, eyes scanning and scanning over your face as if he couldn’t get enough of it.
“There’s--nothing to tell.” You rolled your eyes on a groan.
“I told you what my opinion on the matter was.”
“Your opinion was hardly a true answer.” You huffed.
“Fine. No. I don’t think I will have kids. There. Now tell me what you’ve thought of.” A heaviness filled his eyes. A heaviness you’d also been seeing him show more and more often. Always when watching you. Always when you said something to him. You thought maybe you had upset him somehow but he was always quick to speak and shove the look away.
“I’ve just thought about it since Felicia’s going to have her own.”
“And…?” You egged him on.
“And I don’t think it could ever become a reality.” You watched him closely. Watched that heaviness flicker through his eyes again.
What was he thinking about? What was he feeling to make his eyes look like that?
“But you would want one? In an ideal world. In Zaun?” Silco watched you just as closely back.
“I…suppose.” You grinned up at him, legs kicking upward and making the water splash about.
“I think you would be a good father.” Silco rolled his eyes.
“Are you just saying that because I said it about you?” You shook your head.
“Nope. You also are good with Viktor.” Silco gave a small huff in amusement.
“Well, Viktor is the ideal child. Very sweet. Doesn’t steal flasks from random strangers off the street and explode them before their very eyes.” Your grin only grew wider as he spoke of your very first meeting.
“Well, I also don’t think he would beat other children up and then refuse help for his boo-boos.” Silco narrowed his eyes, leaning ever closer to you.
“I didn’t get any boo-boos and I won those fights fair and square.”
“And I did go through all that trouble to replace your flask with a much nicer one.” You responded, bringing a finger up to tap at the flask which sat in a pocket on the inside lining of his jacket.
“It is very nice.” You smirked.
“You’re very welcome.” Silco gave another small laugh, lips relaxing into an easy smile. His seafoam eyes started up their scanning of your face all over again. A scan that made your heart beat painfully against the cage you had trapped it in to ward it against whatever deeper feelings you had for him.
Your breath lodged itself in your throat when he brought his hand up to brush away a droplet of water from your cheek. And then to do it again closer to your lips.
You--you didn’t know what to do. Didn’t know whether to pull even closer so that your noses might brush or jump back into the inky waters to disappear from view.
But what you did know is you liked the touch. You wanted it to keep going on and on despite your struggle to fight back your feelings.
Silco said your name softly in question and you thought shit was this--was he going to lean in closer?
“Are you…are you human?” The question took you off guard. Made quickly reel back all those feelings you had stupidly let slip from your iron hold of them.
“What kind of a question is that?” You huffed, letting your body dip back into the waters, your hands the only thing still holding you to the surface. “Of course I am.” But Silco continued to watch you too carefully. “Why did you even ask me that?”
“Because…you feel different somehow.” Silco shrugged like you weren’t talking about the one topic you avoided speaking of like the plague.
“Are you trying to piss me off?” Silco sighed your name.
“I’m serious. Magic is rare.”
“You know I don’t like talking about it.” You fully let go of the pool edge then, making to disappear like you had first thought until Silco’s hand shot downward, grabbing hold of your wrist. The action nearly had your heart stopping in your chest.
“You once told me you trusted me enough to tell me those things. That you wanted me to know.” That pink cross over his cheeks once more, burning brighter than before. “It's…just me.”
Even when you wished to forget about your feelings for him, even when you wished to not talk of your magic, you knew you couldn’t deny him.
Not ever.
It was a flaw. Something that should have been corrected a long time ago but was left to fester and grow within you like a fungus.
“I…know I was born. Only humans are born, right?”
“Magic is mysterious.” You huffed.
“You don’t need to tell me that.” You thought of Janna. Of all the things she had told you in your youth.
You thought of that calling . Of how those kids had been praying for help before you had arrived.
“Maybe…maybe I am but I’m…not?” Silco blinked at you, looking just as confused as you felt. “You remember I told you how my guardian found me, yes?” Silco nodded.
“When you were small. In the water.” You nodded back at him.
“She’s…well she’s not human.” Silco's eyes sparked at this.
“Truly?”
“Annoyingly so. Her “human” body isn’t even human. It’s more elven and even then you can tell she’s other.” Silco gently pulled you back towards the edge of the pool as you spoke and you let him without any fuss. “She spends most of her time as The Winds. She’s old. Came here when The Gray first came to be.”
“Winds… your guardian is--she’s real?” Of course, he knew of Janna. Most miners did. She uses most of her energy trying to keep them safe from the choking smog that seeped through the tunnels they were forced to work in; it was only natural for them to appreciate her, even when some didn’t believe.
“Yes, but she’s a lot more irritating than you all give her credit for.” Silco chuckled then.
“She took you in because of your magic?” You nodded.
“She says our magic was what led her to me. I don’t know much else besides that.” You answered, worrying your lip between your teeth. “You said I feel different? Like in a bad way?”
“What? No. Like--other. Like…you’ve always given me the feel of the sea, even when I’ve never been sailing out on it. Like if I were to close my eyes right now, you might melt into the very waters you are in.” He paused for a moment, eyes flickering over your features once more. Something like…worry? Nervousness growing at what he was about to say. “When you hold me, I feel as if I am in the water's embrace.”
“And…is that a bad feeling? Feeling like water has hold of you--like it might drag you under?” You asked, voice coming out low as if scared of the answer.
“No. Never.” He spoke quickly. “I find…peace.” Your heart beat just a bit faster then.
“You don’t let me hug you often. How can I believe you?” You asked, partially teasing so that you could try to regain some semblance of control over yourself. You thought, almost hoped , he would tease you back, but what you hadn’t expected was him to stand and begin pulling his jacket off. “W-what are you doing?” Your eyes flew wide as he kicked his shoes off, leaving him in his patched-up socks.
Your eyes only grew wider when he pulled his shirt off. The first grayish-white layer came off, followed quickly by his bright red shirt, giving you a full view of that thin, yet undoubtedly strong body he typically kept hidden beneath it all.
You weren’t completely unfamiliar with seeing him shirtless. You had once lived at The Last Drop and the boys had a tendency to sleep in nothing but their boxers.
But it didn’t matter because you hadn’t seen him in such a way in years . And you couldn’t help yourself as you looked over every inch of exposed skin. Drank in every scar, bruise, and lean plain he was made up of. Drank in that blush that grew richer and spread down the sides of his neck.
Couldn’t help but feel yourself grow restless at the sight of him.
“Silco, what are--what are you doing? ” You repeated, not knowing what else to say in that moment.
“I can’t swim.” And before you could ask another question or shout at him to stop, he was cannonballing into your pool. You panicked at his warning, diving instantly after him.
It didn’t take you long to find him, your magic helping you feel for him in the darkness. You quickly grabbed and yanked him back to the surface, where he gave a gasp for air.
“What the fuck!” You hissed, struggling a bit to keep both of you above the surface. To ease the struggle you commanded the waters to flow beneath him to keep him up. But he didn’t seem at all bothered by this, because the sound of his laughter filled your ears.
Laugher that had your annoyance dissipating nearly all at once.
“Since when can you not swim?” You shouted as you began to swim him across the small pool till your feet found the sandy bottom in the shallows. You watched him move a bit of his long hair that had fallen out of his bun behind his ear as he found his footing.
A loose bit of hair your fingers itched in their want to move for him.
“Since forever.” He spoke between his dying laughter.
“Well get ready 'cause I’m going to teach you. Ridiculous.” You huffed with a playful shake of your head. You knew he was stubborn and hesitant to ask for anything for himself but this was something you could have taught him a long time ago.
You had taught Sevika to swim so she wouldn’t be so nervous to sail on your Boss’ ship. Taught Vander and even helped teach Viktor, despite his leg.
Swimming was essential. It could make the difference between life and death. Especially since your friend group was always messing around on the docks.
You went to pull your arm away from where you had it wrapped around his waist, but Silco grabbed your forearm, stopping you. Your skin began to burn so hot you thought it might evaporate the water clinging to it.
“If you insist.” His voice came out softer than you would have thought it would.
Why was--you were again confused.
Confused about him jumping into your pool and about why he was trying to be so…so close to you all of a sudden.
“Yeah. I do.” You playfully snapped back. Silco’s lips pulled into an easy smile, his fingers drawing lazy circles over your skin that was making your brain buzz loudly . Making you feel all fidgety on the inside.
Making you suddenly remember he was shirtless. That you were practically shirtless except for the ratty sports bra you typically wore to swim.
“But…why?” Silco’s seafoam eyes glanced towards your lips as you spoke.
“To show you.” He simply said. Words that only further confused you.
“I--show me what?” Silco chuckled, bringing his other hand up to brush more water off your cheek. To hold it. To make your mind switch off and leave you only able to think about him touching your face and arm. At how close he was.
“To show you that I don’t think anything about you is a bad thing.” Your lips parted on the slightest shuddering inhale. “That I would willingly slip away in your waters because I would be surrounded by you. Because it's you.”
“Silco--I--” You didn’t know what to say. What to do . Could hardly even think past the pounding in your ears. Not when he was coming closer .
How was he getting that close?
Why ?
“I don’t--I don’t know what to say to that.” You managed to breathe out, eyes flickering from his thin lips to his seafoam eyes which were full of that--that heavy look again.
A look that, now that you were so close, made you think it was longing .
Longing for--for you?
“You don’t have to say anything if you don’t wish.” You swallowed the growing dryness in your mouth back, only for your lips to all but gasp back open when you felt the tip of his nose brush against yours.
“What…what are you doing?” You whispered, fingertips digging lightly into the skin of his side as if to ground yourself. To make sure that this was real. That this wasn’t some messed up dream.
“Showing you.” He whispered right back, breath ghosting over your lips.
He inched closer ever slowly. So slow as if to give you a moment to say something more. To push him away. To stop him.
Lips brush against your lips, sending a shock through your spine. A tingling warmth that stuck to your lips and pressed closer till he was kissing you.
This…this was happening.
It was finally happening after years of pining after him. After dreaming of this very moment.
It was-- intoxicating .
Driving you to seek more to sate that drug-like addiction his lips were poured into you. A rough yet gentle hand moved over your skin to find rest on your back. A hand that guided you ever closer .
And yet--yet even though you finally had it, your brain began shouting at you.
Why?
Why now?
Why when he had never once tried before?
Why on some random Wednesday?
Why when just last Wednesday you had seen him with another girl? A girl Benzo had laughingly congratulated him on finally winning over.
Why when he had been pining after someone else?
Why, why, why?
You shoved abruptly away, water sloshing at your legs as if to try and soothe your hurt.
“Are--” Silco started, breath heavy on his lips from the recent lack of it. “Are you alright?” He sounded almost--nervous. Anxious as you continued to place distance between you and him.
Game .
He likes to play the game. You’ve seen it multiple times before.
He’s bored. He got bored and wanted a challenge. Or maybe he thought he could win the game against you easily?
You didn’t want to play. Not when you truly had feelings for him. Not when playing would only get your feelings hurt.
Your eyes burned as you started out of the water, grabbing for your bag which held your overlayers.
“I should get back.” You somehow managed to get out past your tightening throat.
“Back? Get back where?” The sound of the water moving alerted you to Silco’s exiting the pool. You quickly tugged the dress you had packed on over your soaked skin and clothes.
“I--uh--Sevika. She’s waiting for me.” You pressed your fingers into your right eyelid, trying to rub away that burning.
“Sevika--wait a moment.” But you didn’t wait. You slung your tote over your shoulder and started for the cave mouth. “Wait--” Silco grabbed your wrist in his hand, fingers feeling even colder thanks to the chill air and their dampness from the water. “I--are you not going to look at me?” You ran your free hand over your mouth to keep him from hearing your elevated and shaky breath. “I didn’t mean--I’m sorry if I overstepped. I just--well I thought…” His voice died out then, leaving his words hanging in the air.
“It’s okay.” You schooled your face as best you could into that of its normal easy-going features before you turned to face him. His face was in that same calm it usually sat but his eyes--his eyes were raging like a stormy sea. So many emotions flashing through those eyes you could hardly even pick up on one of them.
“No. No, it’s not. I--I overstepped. I can see I’ve upset you.” You shook your head, all but yanking a smile to your lips.
“It’s okay. Really. I just--I have to get going.” Silco watched you for a moment longer. A moment when that heaviness returned to wrestle with the rest of those emotions in his eyes.
“I--why do I feel like you are?” He asked softly. And just as softly you pulled your wrist from his hand. A hand whose fingers dragged along your own as if to weakly try to keep you there.
“I’m fine.” You held your hand to your chest as if his touch had burned you. As if to keep your heart shielded. “I’ll…I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” Silco watched you as you began to back away again.
“Okay.” You gave him one last, all too forced smile before rushing from the cave. A rush that grew into a run as your eyes blurred and your mind screamed at you for letting him get so close. Screamed at you for being such a coward.
Silco stood in that dank cave for a while. Just staring at the exit which you had rushed out of. Just thinking and thinking and thinking about what had gone wrong? About why the hell he had tried to kiss you in the first place when you didn’t want to.
He thought you wanted to. He thought he finally saw that you might want to…with him .
He was wrong.
Very much wrong and now he had upset you.
Very much so.
Silco pulled his clothes back on and made his way out of your childhood home.
Why had he done that?
It was so stupid. So, so stu--
Gods but he had wanted to. Had wanted to ever since you had saved him from that gang on the docks when you were teens. Had wanted to ever since you had told him you wouldn’t tell Vander of his failure and meant it.
He’d chased many girls before. Had caught many of them too, but you-- you …he didn’t want to chase them like he wanted to chase you. You who he would risk drowning in the sea if it meant he could be by your side.
But…you didn’t want that. Obviously, you didn’t want that. He was just trying to figure out why he had been so stupid in his thinking you might want to chase him back.
The Last Drop was rather packed for a Wednesday night. Though, he guessed it made sense, wanting to have a little fun and drink your sorrows away when cave-ins had started to become more frequent. When enforcers were marching through the streets looking for blood anywhere they could get it.
Silco glanced towards the table he and his friends usually occupied and instantly regarded doing so. Regretted it because Sevika sat there, blunt between her lips as she smirked triumphantly at an easy win against Connol and Felicia.
You were nowhere in sight. He scanned over the entirety of the bar to make sure of it.
“Did she come find you?” Silco couldn’t have stopped his feet and mouth from moving even if he had wanted to. Sevika hardly glanced up at him as Connol began to deal out more cards for a new game.
“Who?” A frustrated hiss shot from Silco’s grit teeth at Sevika’s words, hand all but slamming down on the table before her. Sevika blinked slowly at this. Blink slowly, leaning back in her seat to look at him near bored.
“Who else would I be looking for?” Sevika pulled her blunt from her lips, blowing a line of smoke into his face he only narrowed his gaze at.
“I don’t know, Silco. You go lookin’ around for lots of girls.” Silco gruffed, pulling away from the table.
You hadn’t come to find her. You would be by her side trying and failing to win the game if you had.
He couldn’t help the small hurt that flashed through his chest at the lie you had given him. At your…your rejection of him.
His eyes snagged on Felicia then, who was giving Silco an almost knowing smile. Caught on her pink painted fingernails running through Connol’s short cropped hair.
A small touch. One Silco ached to feel from you.
“You okay?” Felicia asked, pulling Silco from his hurt-filled thoughts.
“I’m fine.” Felicia hummed, looking like she didn’t believe him at all.
“You two got into a fight huh?” Silco narrowed his eyes down at his friend.
“Hardly.” She gave another hum, keeping that amused disbelief plastered on her face.
“Really? She is the only one who gets you all fussy like this.” Normally, Silco would laugh and play along but--but not now. Not tonight.
“Keep your nose out of it. It’s none of your concern.” Silco snapped too harshly. A harshness Felicia only shrugged at but one that pulled Connol’s rust-colored eyes to look up at him.
“No need to take it out on Felicia, yeah?” He spoke calmly. A calm that carried a very loud warning to back off within it.
“You heard the guy. Nothing to take out. She’s not bothering him. He’s unbothered.” Sevika chimed in, only making Silco’s mood worse. Felicia rolled her eyes, patting Connol’s shoulder as she started to stand.
“Let’s talk, Silco.” Felicia nodded towards the bar.
“There is nothing to talk about.” He tried to keep the bite from his voice, but it slashed through his words regardless. “There was no fight. There was nothing. Nothing--”
You came through the doors then, dripping water everywhere. More water than you had left the cave with.
He knew instantly you must have run to the docks and dove into the waters there.
“Here we go,” Sevika muttered, only adding fuel to the fire burning in Silco’s belly.
You caught sight of him and almost paled . Like you thought he wouldn’t be here. Of course, he would be here. He lived here.
“Go for a swim?” Silco couldn’t stop the words from spilling from his lips as you came closer.
“Uh--yeah.” You spoke as you came to a stop before him and the table.
“You said you needed to go find Sevika.” You glanced Sevika’s way like she might give you an answer. An answer Silco knew she wouldn’t provide just by the sound of her shuffling cards.
“I can’t go swim?”
“You had just come from a swim.” He could see your frustration beginning to boil in your eyes. Could see he was toeing a very dangerous line and he knew he shouldn’t be this--this hurt. Knew he was only lashing out to lash out but he just couldn’t stop himself.
Why couldn’t he stop?
Why couldn’t he just walk away ?
“What does it matter to you?” You quickly questioned back.
“It matters because you lied .” He responded just as fast. You rolled your eyes at him.
“I’m not in the mood for this.” You huffed, but Silco wasn’t done.
“If you lied about such a simple thing as going to see a friend, then how do I know you aren’t lying about other things?” Stop . He needed to stop but his hurt was too strong. Was awakening his anger which he had been trying to keep under control ever since he was a kid.
“What--” You have a huff in your own anger. “If I lied then you lied.”
“There was no lie.” You watched him for a long moment. A moment that had your own hurt flash through your eyes. A hurt he had seen flashing through them when you had left earlier.
“I am not in the mood for your game, Silco. Never have been.” You all but hissed at him. Game? What game? He didn’t know what you were talking about. “But there are plenty here that might want to give it a go.” Silco pulled closer so that he could lean down to catch your eyes fully.
He thought of your lips. Of how soft they had felt against his. How they held a bit of salt from the waters you both had just swam through. How you had kissed him back .
Why had you kissed him back? Why did you run away?
“And what is that supposed to mean?” You bore your dagger-sharp anger right back into his eyes.
“It means go find someone to fuck and leave me be.” Silco felt those daggers skewer right through him at your words.
“Maybe I will.” Again that hurt flashed through your eyes. Hurt you quickly masked with anger.
“Go do it then.” You shot back.
“Fine.” Silco shrugged.
“Fine.” You mimicked. Neither of you moved. Not until Vander’s voice filled the space between you.
“What’s goin’ on you two?” You were the first to look away. He watched your eyes shift when they fell onto Vander. Soften.
Oh , it made his blood boil. Made his fists clenched so tight his fingernails dug into his palms.
“I was just leaving.” You pulled a half smile to your lips that had Vander sighing.
“You just got here, sweethea--”
“Don’t call her that.” Silco snapped before he could even think. Vander turned his cool, gray eyes onto him then, a frown pulling deeply at his lips.
A finger was shoved into Silco’s chest, a small pain blooming there. It was you and you looked very much over his poor behavior.
“He can call me whatever the fuck he wants to call me.” You bit, pressing your finger harder into him. “You don’t get any say in that.”
“Oh yes, I--”
“ Enough ,” Vander commanded, cutting Silco off from saying anything further. “What the hell’s got you two like this now?”
“Nothing!” You and Silco both hissed. You both turned to find the other's eye again.
Hurt . That’s all he saw in your eyes.
Gods Silco was an ass. Gods Silco had messed up.
“Nothing happened.” You spoke in a too- quiet voice. Said it like you were speaking directly to Silco. Your finger fell away from his chest then. He wanted to grab your wrist to keep it there, but his body couldn’t seem to move. “I just came to say hi. I’m…busy.” Vander sighed through his nose at your words, but nodded.
“Alright, sweetheart.” The nickname had always grated at Silco’s nerves, but it shredded at them tonight.
Silco watched you walk back through the bar. Watched you slam open the doors and let them slam shut behind you.
He almost ran after you. He should have run after you but…he was still too angry. Too hurt. Too stubborn .
Felicia gave Connol another loving pat on the shoulder before rushing after you herself, not sparing him a single glance as she left. Sevika grumbled at this, throwing the cards back into the table.
“What happened?” Vander asked again, voice more stern then it had been with you around. Silco waved him off.
“You heard her. Nothing.” He made to walk past Vander to head to his room, but his brother grabbed his arm and pulled him to a stop.
“You two butt heads a lot. Enough I can see this was different.” Silco yanked his arm from Vander’s hold on a scoff.
“Leave out of it.”
“You made a move on her?” Silco leveled Vander with a look that had made many before turn tails and beat it. But not him. Not his brother.
The worst part was that Vander had always hit the nail on the head when it came to Silco’s feelings for you.
“Just talk to her. Tell her what you're feeling . ” Vander had told Silco many many times over the span of time they’d known you. Silco had always brushed his brother off. Always denied his feelings for you. But Vander was no fool. He knew.
“Nothing happened.” Silco insisted, though his voice having lost a bit of its bite was a sure give away that something did .
“I hope to the gods you meant it. She’s our family . Not someone you can have your fun with and leave.” He let go of Silco’s arm then.
He wanted to hiss sharp words at his brother. Wanted to use the man as his own personal punching bag, but Silco’s feet were moving before they even caught up with his brain.
They brought him up the stairs, down the small hallways, and up onto the roof where he fit a cigarette between his lips and watched as you marched off back through the dark streets.
His lips itched to call out for you to come and have a smoke with him. To come sit with him and talk about anything .
But again, he didn’t. Just watched and willed the heavy smoke filling his lungs to ease the onslaught of thoughts and feelings rushing through him.
Nothing.
There has always been nothing.
Though it didn’t hurt any less, knowing he could never have you.
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Poly! MoonBerryCake x Reader Pt. 9
AN: How have we come this far omg- Anyway, I recently hit 100 followers!!! SO I wanted to thank you all so much for your support on this journey! It's been such an amazing ride and I've loved every second. Being a part of this fandom is so fun, even if it's a jail sometimes (Looking at you Tiktok) and I just- I hope to repay the joy you guys have all given me.
This is a request! BUT I combined two requests because I had a really good idea for it! Twisted! Reader makes an appearance again!
Now, I know y'all love Teagan, and I do too! But their mains pmo so for the sake of the story they're the villain for now. Unless you main them, you're cool. This is just based on my experience and since I can't draw them pregnant this is what I need to do.
Part One -> Part Two -> Part Three -> Part Four -> Part Five -> Part Six -> Part Six 1/2 -> Part Seven -> Part Eight
Warning: Teagan gets a bad rep here, some physical violence (People get slapped), and Sl*t shaming (Reader doesn't let that shit slide though).
☁ You were ecstatic. That much was plain to see. You were practically jumping off the walls as you ran from toon to toon, each asking them the same, excited question. "Aren't you excited?!"
☁ The other three could only watch in exasperated awe as you cheered and bounced from foot to foot, trinkets bouncing off your hip. You were like a kid on Christmas, waiting at the elevator for the others willing to do a run to show up.
☁ You had finally, finally, gotten the all clear to return to distracting, even if the other three lowkey dreaded it, and were practically vibrating to return to your work.
☁ You had agreed to start at a normal run, no hunt for Dandy's twisted, and with all three of them with no pleading, which eased them just a bit. They'd be there should worst comes to worst and monitor how you were doing. If at any point you were unwell, they'd pull you from the run and work back up to what you normally were used to doing.
☁ You took what you could get in all honesty, just excited to be back, catching Pebble when he excitedly yipped up at you, his little tail wagging wildly. He was coming along as a back up. Just in case.
☁ Admittedly, the other three dragged their feet when it came to entering the elevator, even as you ran circles around them, yanking and pulling at them, urging them to hurry up.
☁ Pushing against Sprout, you groaned as he let his weight fall back, giving some grand show as to how "Gravity was increasing!", making you screech at him.
☁ You did surprise him when instead of crumbling under his weight, you stayed upright, pushing him up straight with a call for him to "Stop dragging your clown feet!"
☁ It was the four of you, Pebble, Teagan, Shelly and Glisten. Shelly too was excited as this would be her own first run as well, her own tail wagging happily behind her as you and her cheered in excitement. It was an adorable sight, really, there was a fond eye roll as the lever was pulled and the elevator brought you all to the first floor.
☁ While Sprout was trying to find common ground with Teagan about the tape situation, which she was being rather flippant about, Cosmo had cornered you with Astro's help, ticking off a number of things the keep in mind with your return to the field. You nodded along, even if they were sure you weren't listening as much as you tried to portray.
☁ "Additionally," Astro spoke up after Cosmo stopped to take a breath, the sudden glum loon on his face making you perk your attention up as you turned to him. "Your twisted is bound to be more active. We've noticed that more recently someone was turned, the more likely their twisted is to show up. If you need to, take a floor, let Pebble do it."
☁ His eyes shined with a domineering spirit you very rarely saw in the celestial, making you swallow tightly as you nodded. "I will."
☁ His eyes scanned your own before a star shard was ruffling your fur, making you yelp as you swatted at it. It made Astro chuckle as Cosmo tried not to laugh, making you squeal out a number of curses at the cake roll and celestial. The elevator opens just as the star shard retreats and Astro's gentle hand cups your cheek, pressing a hand to your lips. "Stay safe, starlight."
☁ "I will." You nod, standing and smoothing yourself out. Cosmo doesn't let you go far, wrapping his arms around you and smacking a hearty kiss onto your lips. "Just remember who's bed you sleep in, Pudding! Don't get hurt!"
☁ The unsaid threat makes a shiver spin down your spine as you turn, even if the happy fuzzies from the affections make your entire body buzz. You glance around for the final individual, making your way over to where Sprout looks ready to tear his leaves out.
☁ Teagen carried on anyway, passing you even as Glisten warned her to give you a minute. You let her go though, knowing that if they could last as long as they did without you, they'd last a few more minutes. You focused on Sprout, who took a long, deep breath before giving you a soft, tired smile. "Go get 'em, bud." He hums, setting his hands on your hips as you hold his cheeks to press a kiss to his lips. You nod happily before taking off at last, ears pricked for the twisteds.
☁ You find them quick enough, with Pebble staying nearby just in case. He's chasing his tail, you note, finishing another circle around the large boxes near broken. It seems to be a easy enough first floor, tranquil and calm with a number of fallbacks. It makes things fall into place that much easier as the machines are completed one by one.
☁ From there, floor by floor is completed each one a more welcomed reprieve than the last. There are some tensions, you note, as Sprout grows increasingly frustrated with Teagan, bringing up his concerns several times- more of you piping in as you went. Alas, she remained flippant, scoffing at each of you as if exhausted by your mere presence.
☁ You weren't sure if something had happened during your time as a twisted and subsequent recovery, but you knew Teagan always had some sort of...attitude. You tried to remain as accommodating as possible, but sometimes you just couldn't please everyone.
☁ When the elevator door opened and footsteps echoed in the hall, you tilted your head at the sound, not recognizing them right away. Looking behind you, you frowned at the faces you were faced with. Oh.
☁ "Pebble," You say, breaking the tense silence. "Stay close, buddy. I doubt this twisted is gonna like us very much." Not that any of them did, but still.
☁ You waved at your boys, who evidently didn't look thrilled at the prospect but let you go, nodding slowly as you began to take off. Your Twisted spotted you almost immediately and you felt your blood run cold at the sight.
☁ Their side oozed ichor, eyes beady and red and locked right onto you. It made you swallow as you picked up the pace, looking back at the sound of their hands hitting the floor. The development made your eyes widen as they took off much faster, claws outreached and ready to strike.
☁ You nearly tripped over your own feet, Pebble looking ready to jump in as he whines only for you to quickly recover, taking off to where you knew a good distracting spot was. You picked up a twisted Coal as well, which Pebble took so you could focus on the other twisted, even if he stayed nearby- which you appreciated.
☁ A part of you knew that he would though, as you have grown rather close with the pet rock, who slept in your bed with Blu more often than not these days. (Thats right y'all. Blu and Pebble friendship. Pebble sleeps in your bed. Coal sleeps on the floor.)
☁ So you continue, making sure you were distracting around a metal shelf, that managed to hold strong against your twisted's charging. It clanged everytime it rocked against the shelf, but you continued your little song and dance with the twisted. It was like distracting Goob or Scraps.
☁ Still, seeing your own face look like that makes your gut churn bitterly at the thought of being that at any point in time. You regret turning greatly, but if that was the only way to save Vee, you'd do it again in a heartbeat.
☁ You almost debate zoning out like you used to do, but that hope is quickly dashed at the sound of an air horn. It makes you skid to a stop as the Twisted you immediately turns tail to the other direction.
☁ You try yelling and using your ability to get them back, but they've already focused on someone else and you can't get them back until you get between them and the toon they're locked onto. Which, with your twisted, is a challenge.
☁ Anger boils in your gut as you take off once more, Pebble debating leaving the other twisted or following you. You call out a command for him to stay, which he does with a whine.
☁ You can't even help the growl of anger that slips out as you spot Teagan running, the version of you hot on her trail. You take off after her, even if your joints make their distaste known. This would be the final floor for you, you decided a while ago, promising to power through this one in the very least.
☁ You're not sure where Teagan is going, but you can't catch up. You're low on Stamina and without Astro nearby, you unfortunately just have to hope that Teagan has a trick up her sleeve.
☁ Speaking of Astro, you're practically gutted as you follow Teagan around a corner, the teacup making a beeline for the machine he was working on. You yell out for him to be aware, but have no real worry as even you've missed him a few times. He looks up, noting the situation with a nod, only to immediately gape as Teagan throws down a smoke bomb and the Twisted version of you locks onto him instead.
☁ He's trapped in a corner even as you take off once more, the version of you pouncing. It's claws dig into Astro's shoulders, making him cry out as you reactivate your ability. The twisted version of you immediately turns to you, screeching, but you pay it no mind, running in the opposite direction. Anger positively boils in your stomach as you curse and snap, acting more like a beacon than any airhorn could.
☁ You call for Pebble, making the rock run over, barking to call your Twisted's attention to him as you turned back to Astro. He was standing now, if a little woozy as you ran up to him.
☁ "Oh my GOD- I am so, so sorry. I tried catching up, but I couldn't and I didn't know you were here-" You began to babble, reaching into your inventory bag to grab...anything that could help really. You come up empty, but not for long as you see Sprout jogging down the nearby hall. You call to him and he whips his head over, eyes widening as he sees the ichor on your hands, dashing over.
☁ "We told you to be careful-" He's mid-scold when you stop him, shaking your head. "It wasn't me! Astro was hit!"
☁ Sprout pauses, face immediately taking a new tone. "Astro?" He turns and sees the claw marks on his shoulders, staining his blanket as the celestial groans. "Oh shit- Okay, yeah, let's get you to elevator, honey bun." Sprout bends down to scoop up the other main, making him groan. He goes to tell you to follow, not having the mental capacity to track both you and an injured partner, but you're following anyway.
☁ "I don't have any meds." You mutter forlorn, immediately looking defeated. Sprout frowns at that, giving a sigh. "I don't have enough tapes. I told Teagan there would be enough for both of us, but does she listen? No."
☁ "I'm sor-" Astro begins to groan, but you cut him off with a barked "Don't." Sprout raises a brow at your sudden temper, never knowing you to be one to act so...aggresively? You've always been a happy go-lucky angel of a being, never failing to light up the room with a smile.
☁ But to see you? Snarling with anger and sharp teeth on display, leftover from your time as a newly turned twisted? It makes his skin bristle. "What happened?"
☁ "That airhorn?" You practically spit. "Teagan blew it. Took the twisted from me and led them right to Astro! Then smoke bombed and let him take the hit!" You're seething and Sprout blinks in surprise at this, looking down at Astro. The Celestial's eyes are wide, looking between you and Sprout himself, as if uncertain how to go from there.
☁ Sprout wasn't sure either, simply taking you both to the elevator. Glisten and Cosmo are already there, hiding behind a box. Just as Sprout's about to call to Glisten the directions to the last machine, it goes off and the Elevator opens.
☁ Sprout quickly ducks inside, calling Cosmo over. The cake roll immediately gets to work, digging into his inventory for a first aid kit, getting to work on Astro's wounds. The celestial pouts, but sits, having seen first hand what Cosmo's glare is like when you dared disobeying.
☁ Admittedly, Sprout's still watching you. You're standing at the brink of the elevator, positively livid, but waiting. Like a predator would wait for its prey. You're poised, muscles tight and ready to strike the first chance you loosen your iron clad will just the tiniest bit.
☁ If nothing else, he's excited. To see you? The peachy keen, bushy-tailed, absolutely beaming beacon of hope and sunshines and rainbows and everything nice in the world absolutely let lose? Oh he's buzzing. Even if it's quelled a bit as Astro squeezes his hand, cursing at the sudden infectant on his wound.
☁ Glisten himself steps inside, with Shelly jogging in soon after. Pebble makes his appearance with a yip, immediately running to Astro's side with a wag in his tail, even if he whines at the main.
☁ Then, you're prey arrives. She's panting as she turns the corner, the elevator slamming down behind her as she bends down to lay her hands on her knees.
☁ Everyone is watching you, and your boys are sure you know it. Sprout swears on his life that your eyes flash red as you stalk over to her, growling as you do with a sneer on your lips.
☁ "Where were you so-called-distractors?!" Teagan snaps, turning to you with an indignant scowl on her face. "I nearly got hit!"
☁ "Oh. did you?" The snarl on your face falls for a second, replaced with a grin so sweet even Cosmo avoids looking over too long, cleaning the last of Astro's wound before pressing a bandage to it and a parting kiss. It makes Astro grin before he's gently pressing his own peck to Cosmo's head, immediately turning his attention back to you.
☁ Astro debates stopping you, but figures she's more than earned it with the attitude she's been giving Sprout all day.
☁ "That's funny." You continue, stepping close enough that every step forward makes Teagan take one back before she's pressed against a wall. Faster than any of them can react, your hand snaps out, claws digging into the metal of the wall, and this time Sprout's sure there's a flicker of red. "Because you know who did get hurt? Huh? After someone blew an airhorn? Then led the twisted right to him? Then smokebombed to ensure they saw him? Because I do."
☁ Teagan tries looking for an escape, but you're domineering in every aspect of the word. You're not even focused on them and Sprout wants to bow his head in shame.
☁ It's in your stance, the tone of your voice and your general aura around you. You're enraged and everyone in the elevator knows it.
☁ Everyone, but apparently Teagan. After realizing she doesn't have one, she rolls her shoulder and stands straight, getting in your face despite the snarl on your features. "If he would've moved, it wouldn't have happened! He's as much to blame. In fact, if anyone is to blame, it's you!"
☁ Pebble barks at this angrily, running up to your side, but he's momentarily ignored as whatever patience you had snapped. "MY FAULT?! You blew an airhorn for no reason. We had it under control. You've been a selfish, greedy bitch this entire time with no regards for anyone but yourself! You refuse to share tapes with Sprout, constantly get in mine and Pebble's way and damn near took a medkit from Cosmo! You're snotty at the best of times and too righteous for what I know you've done at the worst. I get your family system has a metric fuck-ton of drama going on, most of it self-inflicted by the way, but that does not give you the excuse to take that out on us, especially not my family."
☁ Teagan gapes as the elevator moves to return to the Lobby, Glisten standing by the lever with a grimace on his face as he stared at Teagan. Shelly is avoiding looking at either you or Teagan, making sure Astro is okay while Cosmo finishes up. Pebble is dashing between you and Sprout, whimpering up a storm.
☁ Sprout himself is watching carefully, torn between stepping between you two and letting you handle yourself. You're on a thin fuse and it's been snipped from her accusations. But Teagan has been a pain for awhile, the drama between her and Rodger reaching several boiling points which she takes out on the rest of the toons. It makes Sprout snarl to himself at the thought, keeping to his spot beside the other two. Astro, at least, looks thoroughly entertained and Cosmo seems neutral about the whole ordeal.
☁ There's a crack in the elevator and Sprout's immediately looking over. Your head is snapped to the left, cheek already looking swollen as Teagen's raised hand quivers. There are tears in her eyes, but she's just as angry as you're slowly looking.
☁ Sprout steps forward to intervene, but Astro's tail swipes against his knees, pulling his attention to the celestial, who shakes his head. So Sprout stills an watches as you move your jaw.
☁ "You have no idea what I've been through! You have no right to mention that! It's not my fault you- you sell yourself out! You're cheap and a dime-a-dozen toon! You should stay in your lane before I force you back into it!" Teagan snaps, clenching her hands.
☁ You look back at her, almost stunned but you quickly recover. "Let me make this one thing explicitly clear to you." You begin, tone chilling the air in the elevator. "Everyone knows what happened between you and Rodger. How? We've heard your screaming matches for weeks. Either break-up or don't. Just figure it the fuck out, if nothing else but Toodle's sake. Second," You hold up a second finger, eyes narrowing. "If you think for one ounce of a second that your relationship is anything comparable to mine, I have some bad news for you. There is nothing even remotely similar between our relationships. Ours is healthy, but you wouldn't know anything about that now would you. And third," You pause.
☁ Then there's another crack and Teagan is backed against the wall. "If you ever lay your hands on me again, I'll feed you to a twisted." You glower just as the elevator opens. You look at it then at your boys, grinning like normal.
☁ "C'mon, lets get Astro to bed. He's injured so he loses rights to complain about getting babied."
☁ "I do not!"
☁ Sprout's already laughing as he carries Astro to your room, Cosmo coming up behind you with an arm around your waist. He waits until you're out of earshot of the others before nudging you. "That was pretty hot, you know, pudding."
☁ You flush before laughing, pushing him away by his face. "Yeah, yeah, keep it to yourself. Don't you have a celestial to heal?"
☁ Cosmo snickers, pressing a kiss to your lips under the guise of healing you just as Pebble runs up to join you guys, beating you to your own room where he sits with Blueberry cake against Astro.
☁ Pebble isn't sure what really went on, but watching you laugh again makes it all seem alright.
☁ Even if it was at the expense of Teagan.
☁ She seemed like a cat lady anyway.
#dandy's world x reader#dandys world x reader#astro dandys world#astro novalite#dandy's world astro novalite x reader#cosmo doesn't have a last name#astro x reader#cosmo x reader#dandy's world cosmo#sprout seedly x reader#dandy's world sprout seedly#sprout seedly#dandys world sprout#sprout x reader#dandy's world cosmo x reader#moonberrycake x reader#moonberrycake
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Uhm your last ask abt fairy reader in price’s humidor and I can’t resist
Price having his fairy warm his cigars for him between her legs
Maybe she can make fairy sparks to light his cigar (gives it the same kinda kick as the honey cause it’s got distilled magic in it). Or maybe he makes her strain to flick his table lighter. Maybe he scares her with it, holding her while threatening to burn the bottoms of her feet while she squirms.
Maybe he switches to cigarillos or hand rolled options sometimes— cause with the right finesse, those can fit in her tiny fairy cunt, her honey soaking into the paper.
And in a world where people milk fairy honey? There’s probably all kinds of tools and substances they sell to get fairies aroused fast, but price has a bit too much pride, likes to do things the slow, old fashioned way.
Nikolai who keeps his fairy leashed because he can’t bear to clip her wings. To much empathy for flying creatures— he cannot rob you of that. Or maybe he’s had her long enough to not worry— she’s fully tamed and trained. She’ll lick the powdered sugar from his fingers if he has a donut for breakfast. Price’s fairy is terrified of Nik’s— will she be like that some day? Acting like she’s in love with her tormentor?? She’s even more scared when Nik offers to train her as a favor.
And she gets this funny feeling in her belly when price laughs and politely declines. Says he likes her just the way she is.
(And if we’re talking hardcore objectification. I imagine Soap’s careless. He’s been through more than one fairy in his day. No big deal— Ghost’ll just find him another. Misfits have a knack for finding them)
I’m going a little crazzzyyy
-🦷
[reference - no longer my most recent ask, i'm slow]
i raise you: price training her how to properly hug his cock by making her work herself over his cigars. i also raise you price training his fairy to spark when he flicks her head as if she's a lighter like a fucking dog.
him dipping cigarillos in her cunt is making me severely unwell. can just see him running out of flavor half way through, patting down his pockets like she's a misplaced lighter just to freshen up his dart even as it's still smoking
okay. not particularly related to what you're talking about, but the jewelry bit added at the end of that fic was def inspired by art i found which i'm unfortunately not gonna link just cause i saw it on a repost site and i'm not sure where to find the original art cause I don't have any social media. but! the artist very clearly had a line in which they depicted fairy girls being turned into jewelry and the main link piece would often be a specialized plug their size attached to a chain which would obv be linked to the actual jewelry. i don't really have anywhere i'm going with this I just thought you should know that.
hm. i can picture nik's fairy having just as much empathy for him straight from the gate. like what do you mean this human knows what the world looks like from above better than he does from his actual (significant) level? she's easy to train because she lets herself be trained, at least a little, but price's fairy doesn't know that!! she's scared as hell to be made into some docile little creature, but price would never allow it. she'll never admit she's grateful for him but she is when he tells nik he can handle it, when he stuffs her into his pocket so she can't quite hear when he says he likes her just the way she is, teeth marks on his finger tips and all
(also also. im not normal about burning so i won't go too crazy BUT. i will say when he's training her to bahave like a lighter, he def holds the heated metal of the guard against her ☹️)
#gouge answers#fairy!reader#🦷 anon#unlucky foot chat#sorry to self promote so much tn but im saying its fine cause of the huge influx of new followers#yall should know ehat youre in for
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Hii!! I’m currently back in my jjba phase (specifically part 4) and I was wondering if you could do relationship headcanons with Josuke? If not then you can totally ignore this!! Hope you have a great day/nice :D
Hello new Anon. You my friend has impeccable taste. Josuke is my baby girl and I adore him. You didn’t specify what the reader she be like so I took some liberties and made them a stand user, I just think it’s neat.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/44c3ce2c886f5b559e5d3a5afae36e24/00df8ee35598db9c-ac/s540x810/1e1d6a7f972fb7e25fa670b81c53430da6bde002.jpg)
Look at my pouty boy. I love him.
Josuke relationships headcannons
This man wears his heart in his sleeve and I love him for it.
He’s not one to shy away from talking to people if he really wants to, but I feel like you probably met him through Koichi. Either a childhood friend or you met in class but it wasn’t hard for you to befriend him. One afternoon after some studying together he took you with him to a cafe to grab some food and that’s where Okuyasu and Josuke bombarded him at the table. And that’s when they met you.
He loved sitting beside you at the cafe as you finished your food before begrudgingly saying goodbye to everyone and heading home. He’d never admit it, but he wish you wouldn’t have left, give him a chance to get to know you at least! Oh well.
But then, you bumped into him again, running from some trouble. Just like him you were a stand user, so it wasn’t uncommon to get in trouble for things that weren’t your fault. Your stand had a bit of a mind of its own so often got you into trouble.
After that day, when he met your stand, you two became very close. If your stand is strong then he introduces you to Jotaro, bragging about how he’s his nephew and that he always asks him for help with his work. Cut to him begging Jotaro for you to join them constantly.
Anyways, onto more relationship based headcannons.
My man loves it when you play video games with him. When you come over to study he usually tries to distract you to get you to join him and play but please make him study. His mom would appreciate you motivating him to study.
After the studying is done, he loves sitting back and watching a movie with you, wrapping his arms around you and not letting go.
He loves to kiss your forehead whenever you meet up for the first time each day. He’s a very affectionate person, most definitely getting you flowers every Valentine’s Day, chocolates are unavoidable as well. Don’t reject his love he’ll probably cry once he’s alone.
Yours and his stand are often seen holding hands, just like you do with him. It’s especially funny to the rest of your friends when your stand is crushed in his hugs and you sort of just keel over wherever you’re stood. Even Josuke thinks it’s funny but then remembers it probably hurts and tries to help you.
All in all he’s a 10/10 boyfriend.
Sorry this one took so long. I’ve been feeling very unwell recently and be stressed with college. Anyways hope you enjoy what I have here Anon.
#x reader#jjba x y/n#jjba josuke#jjba x reader#jjba x you#josuke x reader#josuke higashikata#jojo josuke#jojo’s bizzare adventure x reader#jojo bizarre adventure
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May I ask for angsty Gortash headcanons now too *does grabby hands*
1. He never mourned Durge properly. Rather, he did not have the time to. Dire times.
2. He looked for Durge in Tav when he offered that alliance but never really filled that void.
3. He's insecure with his upbringing. He's not a real noble. So he turns those insecurities into his masterpieces, in a fucked up sense. His atrocities. He genuinely believes hes doing the right thing.
4. Durge is the only one in his mind when he dies. If Durge is the one who kills him, he's a little more at peace.
5. He truly did love and care for Durge the only way he knew how. The feeling is genuine and mutual.
6. He can never let his parents go. He can't ever have them killed. They still haunt him. That's also why he dislikes the idea of Durge being so obedient to his own father, but he understands the fear. The devotion. He is a bit jealous of the love, even though it's not really a good kind of love.
7. I dont like the idea that Gortash learned to fuck in the house of hope through haarlep because he would have been ten years old and uh,,, you know... But I do like the idea that he observed, and haarlep knew young Gortash was watching, and it gave him a sort of indifferent view of sex. He sleeps around for benefits and kept an open mind regarding sex, that it can be a weapon. A tool. And he got so much of what he wanted from that. It didnt make him feel dirty or bad, but just indifferent. Like it's something he'll do not for pleasure but for duty. Nothing too intense like with Astarion. Just indifference. It wasnt until Durge that he felt an actual desire. Intense, obsessive desire. And hes figured out so many kinks with Durge lol.
I just really like the hc that he's not as sexually rabid and is actually tame about it but has the most insane unwell sex with Durge.
8. Burn scars. I recently discovered this hc from my favourite artist and i think it's so good. Some people also talk about a disability with his walking cane and I think of it a lot.
9. He's a schedule freak. He is strict with his sleep. With his meetings. With his meals. Just an obsessive guy who focuses on the littlest of details. He cant go too much because it genuinely makes him want to throw up. He has an image to maintain and hes thorough with it. He doesnt like noises during meetings. Very meticulous. Durge is freedom to him. Or just a different kind of obsession honestly.
10. There was a point in time where he planned to overthrow Bane and Bhaal to free him and durge. So they can be together. It all fell apart when durge died. It wasnt just orin's fault. It was partly his. He lost focus and vision when he lost durge, hence why it became such a mess.
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Very very urgent emergency request! Just stumbled upon your blog after that fluffy Howl fic of yours; couldn't resist sticking around for more of your fantastic headcanons.
I recently experienced something truly awful a few days ago.. While enjoying a party with my friends, the atmosphere suddenly shifted, and I began feeling unwell. Since then, there's been a blank space in my memory. The following day, upon waking up in our shared apartment, I discovered that I must have experienced a sex*** abuse. I'm currently terrified, in pain, and enduring ongoing bleeding from my private area. Trust has become a challenge, and I'm overwhelmed, wishing I could just disappear. Unsure of what steps to take, I find myself reaching out for comfort of any, any kind.. May I humbly request comfort from Dabi, Bakugo, Enji, Todoroki, and Kaminari, along with their girlfriends, who have navigated similar challenges?
If this plea is too much, please feel free to disregard it. I deeply appreciate your writings, as they bring immense comfort to many.
Oh, my dear Anon...
I am so sorry to hear that something like this happened to you. I can only imagine what you feel right now.
Please, if you feel like you need to talk to someone, feel free to drop into my messages and let's chat a little!
I hope those headcanon will bring you at least a little bit of comfort.
Mha men & sexually abused s/o
Dabi
- Dabi is burning with anger. Of course he isn't mad at you, he is mad at the person who even dared to violate you this way.
- He should stay with you but he leaves. Of course he couldn't stay. Touya doesn't leave you because of the disgust or hate. No. He is going for a hunt! It doesn't matter if it's one or a few people... All police could find were few bodies burned beyond recognition.
- Touya returns to your shared apartment, sheds his coat and is all yours from now on. He doesn't speak a word about what happened unless you feel the need to talk about it. He won't press but will listen when you need to throw it all out.
- He knows some doctors that aren't sketchy but at the same time they won't call the police or anything like this.
- Even if you are scared, Touya pushes you to get checked. He of course stays with you to provide comfort and show you that you are safe with him. Touya knows you are suffering mentally but he doesn't want the physical suffering to continue if there is a way to stop/heal it.
- Back at home Touya stays near you. He wishes he could be glued to you but he understands you need some space.
- When you tell him you need any kind of closeness - he is there immediately, wrapping you in his embrace, holding you as close as possible.
- It takes you a bit of a time to open up to him. You tell him everything; and he listens to it without a word.
When you start to cry he just squeezes you harder until you calm down. Once this happens, Touya starts to tell you, "I'm sorry, doll. I am sorry I wasn't there to protect you but from now on... I will always be near. No one will ever hurt you again. I love you and I'll make sure to help you however I can."
- And he really does it. Since that unfortunate day, Touya does everything to make you feel safe and to help you heal; both mentally and physically.
He doesn't push your boundaries but helps you carefully move them as you heal and again open yourself up to him.
Touya never healed himself from his past so seeing you getting better even after such a scary situation makes this villain smile.
Bakugo
- He is pissed but he won't show it openly. You went through enough stress already and his anger wouldn't help someone in your position so he stops himself from yelling.
- Bakugo doesn't immediately push you to talk. He is more concerned about your health so his first step is to convince you to visit a proper specialist. He doesn't want you to be in pain or to suffer.
When you finally agree to visit the doctor, you are going there with your blond guard dog because Katsuki isn't leaving your side. He will even fight the doctor if it means staying by your side through the visit.
- Back at home, Bakugo is completely different than normal. He is calm and quiet around you.
- If he decides to give you a kiss, hug or simply get close to you he'll ask for your permission beforehand. Just to be sure you are comfortable with him and his touch.
- If you are on any medications he makes sure you take them, it's for your own good afterall.
- Katsuki makes sure to provide comfort in every way possible. He cooks or orders your favorite comfort food so the two of you can enjoy some tasty food together.
- When you feel comfortable enough to open up about what happened, Katsuki just pulls you into a tight hug. "It's okay now. You're safe and I'll make sure to get the bastard that hurt you. I'll make him pay."
- And he really does. Whenever you are asleep or busy with something, Bakugo is on his phone or computer, working his ass off to find the person that did it. He is going to make sure whoever did this will pay the appropriate price for hurting you.
- Whenever you need it, he is ready to hold you close while gently caressing your hair and back. He will talk even about the most silly thing just to see you smile just a little bit. Staying quiet is also something he is ready to do, spending time in silence isn't a problem for him.
Enji
- Enji isn't home very often so it's easy for you to hide it all and just choke yourself with this traumatizing experience.
- When he is actually back, he quickly notices the changes in your behavior. You were like a candle light; warm and happy and now? You resembled an extinguished candle... Cold and sad looking.
- It annoys him because he is really trying for you but suddenly you are all distanced for no reason! Not only in everyday life but also in bed.
- Enji finally confronts you, demanding answers from you! He is your lover, so how dare you ignore him?! Of course he is not gentle about it.
- As you reach your breaking point and admit to what happened at the party you went to, he is shocked that something like this happened to you.
- He is not a master of comfort so at the beginning he isn't sure what to do but in the end Enji pulls you into a tight hug. "Forgive me for being so harsh on you. I'll do better."
- This is a promise he actually keeps up with! Enji is trying his best to understand your needs and boundaries now.
- He pays more attention to you, building up the trust again to show you that you can still trust him and nothing has changed between the two of you.
- Enji loves to hold you close and just comfort you when you feel bad. He enjoys cuddling your smaller frame, making sure that you feel protected.
- If you think he will leave it just like that and do nothing about it you are really wrong. He is a Number One hero and whoever dares to hurt you, now has to deal with him. Enji uses all of his contacts and influence to find that bastard.
- He makes sure you are feeling safe and loved again.
Shoto
- Poor guy is deeply confused when one day you go completely quiet. He is worried if you made it home after the party.
- After receiving no information from you, Shoto goes to your place to check on you. Just to be sure you are okay.
- The state he found you in was heartbreaking. His beautiful girlfriend, his little ray of sunshine suddenly being in distress and bad mental shape.
- He approaches you carefully, asking questions to find out what happened.
- When you reveal what happened the night before, he is shocked. How could someone even do this to another person?
- Of course Shoto doesn't judge you. It was beyond your control and he understands but he slowly talks you into going to the right authorities.
- Shoto goes with you everywhere to make you feel good and safe. He won't allow anyone to get too close to you.
- Back at home he is mostly quiet, letting you decide if you feel like talking or doing anything together.
- When you tell him yes, Shoto is all over you. He wants you close to show you all the love he has for you.
- His favorite thing to do is to simply hold your hand. It gives him this feeling of intimacy and shows him you still trust him.
- Shoto's second favorite thing is holding you right before falling asleep. You look so cute and despite what happened, he is happy you are with him. "My love. I am so lucky to have you and I promise you that I won't let anyone hurt you ever again."
- Like every hero he won't let it slide. Shoto will make sure that whoever did this pays for your pain.
Kaminari
- When he finds out, he is terrified and blames himself for this. He had to go with you but a sudden shift in schedulge made him go to work while you went to the party.
- He really doesn't know what to do BUT he quickly gathers himself. You need him and he is there to serve.
- Just like others he accompanies you at the doctor and during the talk with authorities.
- Back at home Denki is really careful around you. Always asking if you need anything, making sure you are okay with stuff he does. He never leaves you alone unless you request him to do so.
- He buys your favorite snack and even tries to bake something you like. Even if he isn't the best at it, he'll try his best for you!
- You feel like watching some silly movie or show? He is there with you!
- Or maybe you feel like just laying down and listening to some music? This dude made a playlist from all your favorite songs!
- Denki is ready to do everything to make you comfortable. Your smile is the most beautiful thing in the world and he is going to work hard for it to appear again upon your pretty lips.
- Even if he blames himself for your harm, he'll never tell you about this but instead he will do EVERYTHING he can to make you feel good again. "We'll make it work, yeah? I won't leave your side and we are going to work through it together." He always assures you with a big bright smile.
- Whoever dared to put hands on you can't sleep peacefully. Kaminari, with the help of his friends, will hunt this bastard down and bring him to justice.
#my hero academia#mha#my hero academia headcanons#mha headcanons#boku no hero academia#bnha#bnha headcanons#bakugo x reader#dabi x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#bakugo headcanons#mha bakugou#touya todoroki x reader#mha dabi#enji todoroki x reader#endeavor x reader#denki x reader#denki kaminari#denki kaminari x reader#shoto x reader#todoroki x reader#todoroki shoto
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French Poetry & Chocolate. - Regulus Black X Reader
A/N: First request woo! anyway. enjoy! (Requested) She/her pronouns for the reader as requested. Though I typically use they/them for my writing.
Anonymous asked:
A Regulus black x Slytherin reader where they are best friends and the reader gets her period and he helps and comforts her? No worries if not!
The Slytherin common room was only this quiet on weekends when most students were out socializing, and partying. Though for y/n, they'd spent most of the day in bed in her room, curled up in bed with a comforting novel her best friend had brought from home.
Y/n was busy, nose buried in this novel, too engulfed in fiction to even notice that Regulus was standing in the doorway. He knocked on the door that was open gently to alert y/n of his presence.
"Hello," Regulus said, moseying about with his hands in his pockets after setting his satchel down near the dresser. Y/n was a bit embarrassed, her hair was a bit messy, and she was wearing comfortable clothes, even her room was a bit messy in the absence of her roommates. "Hi," Y/n said, gesturing for Regulus to sit at the end of her bed. he followed suit, taking note that Y/n looked unwell.
they had been best friends since before their first year, so they had seen the best and the worst of one another over the years. It didn't bother Regulus, but it did raise some concerns.
"I haven't seen you out and about today, So I thought I'd check in." Y/n leaned up, shrugging slightly. "Yeah, I haven't been feeling well," she admitted.
Regulus frowned. "I can take you to the hospital wing now if its-"
He was promptly cut off. "no, no reg, I'm fine really. I just started my period. That's why I haven't felt well today."
Regulus nodded, sitting there. for a boy who reads so much, this was probably one of the only topics he didn't have any knowledge about. "Well if I can help in any way do let me know." Regulus wasn't sure of what to say. He only grew up with a brother, and his mother kept herself incredibly private. So it was no wonder the poor boy found himself useless. Y/n chuckled slightly. "I do appreciate it. I've been reading this."
Y/n turned the novel over to show him the cover. It was a dramatic fiction novel about two muggles. something regulus had recommended. "Oh, how are you liking it?" his eyes lit up, he was excited that y/n liked the book he had suggested to her and brought around.
"Oh, I think it's lovely." Y/n went on. "It's been keeping me on the edge of my seat. Who would have thought muggle fiction would be so interesting?" Y/n chuckled slightly.
"Well if you're interested I could read you some of my favorite poetry, I have another book with me today," Regulus said.
Y/n's eyes lit up, "that would be awesome." she said, patting the edge other side of her bed for Regulus to sit by her. The boy grabbed his satchel, rummaging through its contents. "I actually also have this." Regulus pulled out a small black velvet box, handing it to Y/n as he sat next to her with a small poetry book. Y/n reached over, gently opening the box to reveal some very fancy and decadent chocolates. "my mother sometimes gives them as gifts to people she wants to impress, they are very delicious- but, very sweet."
Seeing that y/n was excited, despite not feeling well made Regulus feel content. "Thank you reg, seriously." the two shared a glance, and the boy pushed his dark curls out of his face clearing his throat.
As he began reading, settled beside him, head resting on his arm as she tried the small chocolate truffles he had offered, instantly feeling a lot better than she had been all morning.
Regulus began reading his poetry, it was all in French, but he translated for her. A French poet, Charles Baudelaire was one he had been reading recently.
Always be drunk. That's it! The great imperative! In order not to feel Time's horrid fardel bruise your shoulders, grinding you into the earth, Get drunk and stay that way. On what? On wine, poetry, virtue, whatever. But get drunk. And if you sometimes happen to wake up on the porches of a palace, in the green grass of a ditch, in the dismal loneliness of your own room, your drunkenness gone or disappearing, ask the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock, ask everything that flees, everything that groans or rolls or sings, everything that speaks, ask what time it is; and the wind, the wave, the star, the bird, the clock will answer you: "Time to get drunk! Don't be martyred slaves of Time, Get drunk! Stay drunk! On wine, virtue, poetry, whatever!"
As Regulus spoke the words, he peeked over at y/n who was sleepily listening. By the time he was halfway through another poem, Y/n was fast asleep, and Regulus was content.
#reader insert#hp x reader#x reader#hp#slytherin x reader#slytherin boys#regulus black x y/n#regulus black x female reader#regulus black x reader#regulus black x you#regulus black#regulus deserved better#james x regulus#sirius and regulus#james loves regulus
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An Updated ‘Reasons Why I Ship Hiorin’ — Because It’s Been Ages Since I Made The First One And I’ve Had More Thoughts (and we got more moments!)
Aka: can you tell this ship makes me mentally unwell?
Hi again! It’s been a while. I did make one of these long posts a while back outlining why I choose to ship hiorin even though they’ve barely interacted and on the surface don’t look like they’d make sense at all. Since then, hiorin has gained quite a few shippers in the fandom and I keep thinking about the ship, especially with the Bastard Munchen vs PXG game FINALLY giving us some new crumbs. Unsurprisingly, ever since making the first post I’ve also had a lot more ideas about the dynamic, its potential, some more connections between them that I never touched on before, etc… and rather than editing the other post I thought it would be easier to just make a new one.
Some stuff I go over here might be familiar from the first post. I want this to be a kind of hub for any and all of my hiorin interpretations, analysis, trivia, headcanons, ‘theories’ (which I don’t think will be canon but the narrative potential for them is through the roof) and anything else I think is relevant to the ship. Feel free to jump around and read whatever is most interesting for you. Hiorin is a ship that, for me, is built on mountains of untapped potential. I just want to bring that potential to light all in one place.
Note: for this post I’ll only use information that has been written by Kaneshiro, drawn by Nomura or Sanomiya, or has otherwise been green-lit by Kaneshiro as canon. Merch collabs, voice actor QnAs, the PWC game etc… for me do not count as canon and I won’t use them. Also, the 10-image limit is biting my ass so my formatting for certain bits might be a bit all over the place. Apologies.
So without further ado. Let’s start! Enjoy the yap sesh!
Part 1 — The Manga Canon
Hiorin get their (very sparse and brief) interactions mostly from the Third Selection Arc (chapters 87-108) and the U20 arc (chapters 109-151). We’re also recently getting some new moments in the BM vs PXG match (chapters 250-present).
First off: the tryouts. It’s implied here that Hiori and Rin have never met, as Hiori notices Isagi’s response to Rin and asks if Isagi knows who Rin is. Rin also doesn’t acknowledge Hiori in any way here, so we can presume they’re strangers (although some shippers like to headcanon that they met during the first selection).
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2b521213df01a8c37c688d9c281fb0ea/9984c348cc0a5f68-a9/s540x810/7603bea362c5f92b68f4b840bcd8cd816fed75c5.jpg)
That being said during the match, after Isagi has been thoroughly shut down by Karasu, Rin turns his attention to Hiori as a teammate to help him get the ball up the field. Rin has never seen Hiori play before (as far as we know). They’ve never even talked. They’re barely getting familiar with each other’s play styles. And yet, they immediately link up to form a clean back and forth that optimises Rin’s play style. In fact, this duo helps Rin score 1 goal, and it would have helped Rin score 2 had Shidou not rudely interrupted the second.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7dc5441e297bbc8925c57522c5e9c120/9984c348cc0a5f68-b3/s540x810/30401480ee6235022d50ce263e41f94a357523c8.jpg)
It’s so deadly that Otoya has to intervene specifically to break them up, so that they can no longer continue their one-two passes up the field and threaten to go for another goal. (Also notice in this page below how as soon as the kickoff happens, Hiori is already running into position in the background. He understands what Rin wants to do).
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/335c6aa204dfde4e04f2e0a6719c8c79/9984c348cc0a5f68-70/s540x810/1efa442e4f96c5849c73f57906dcf67b16bc3df4.jpg)
Not only did Hiori and Rin naturally form a link-up, but Hiori was also fully capable of keeping up with Rin, something Nanase admitted he struggled with during this match and even Isagi was struggling with as well, since later on we see Isagi fail to intercept one of Hiori’s passes due to not being able to reach it in time (which presumably Rin would have been able to were he in Isagi’s position). So, from what we see of Hiori and Rin in this match, they’re on a similar wavelength in terms of skills, field vision and gameplay, and are naturally able to link up even as strangers. I’ll note here that neither of them were playing at full power — Hiori was playing on 0 motivation, and Rin was still utilising his Puppeteer play style instead of his Destroyer. More on this later in the ‘Headcanons’ section.
After the Tryouts, we next see them interact in the U20 match. We start with a brief callback to their tryouts link up in chapter 132, where Rin passes to Hiori. Hiori is acting as a relay between Isagi and Rin, which in my opinion would be a good way to utilise him after the NEL. Whether or not that’s how Kaneshiro chooses to use him in the future is anyone’s guess though.
The next big moment comes in chapter 140, after Shidou has kicked Rin in the face and the game has briefly paused. I think this is by far the most ‘iconic’ hiorin moment. While Isagi is analysing the previous play and Karasu is arguing with the ref, Hiori is the only one who actually checks on Rin. Even Bachira and Reo were right next to Rin and neither of them go to him. Hiori was further down the field but he moved to help Rin first. Not only is he gentle with and worried for Rin, but by some miracle Rin actually accepts his help! It feels almost out of character, given how angry Rin is for the rest of the match, but for this very brief moment he lets Hiori help him up and reassures him that he’s ‘fine’ (yeah sure buddy…).
For many this is the main ‘ooooooh’ moment with hiorin. But what if I told you it actually happens a second time this match? After Aiku goes rogue in chapter 142 and tries to score a goal, Rin ends up slide-tackling him to prevent it. And once again, if you look in the background of the panels following the interception in chapter 143, who is it helping Rin stand? It’s Hiori. And this time they actually hold hands!
The final hiorin moment in the U20 match comes soon after this in chapter 144, when Rin is about to enter his Destroyer mode. When Rin enters Destroyer mode, Hiori is in possession of the ball and so Rin steals it from him in a completely unpredictable move that had everyone stunned.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/45c492ef54d3e6e91313dd5cd25c667a/9984c348cc0a5f68-df/s540x810/c2d7d5fd4054528fdc1fcf0df2edd2ba90516d93.jpg)
The U20 match moments, for many of us hiorin shippers, felt like the last time we’d ever see them properly interact. I at least had zero hopes for PXG. But oh boy was I wrong! Kaneshiro might not realise the dynamic he’s setting up with this duo but I’m gonna milk every interaction for what they’re worth! And so with that, I’ll bring you to the BM vs PXG match (note: currently still ongoing, so I’ll update this section as we get more moments). Since the U20 match, we’ve had some changes. The biggest one is Hiori’s personality. After going through his arc in Ubers, Hiori has become more outspoken and confident, playing into his ‘Ultra-Sadist’ style and being more than happy to speak his mind. He’s more argumentative and can whip up a good piece of trash talk (my gamer boy fr!). We see this on full display in chapter 251 when he completely shuts down Rin’s goal opportunity because Rin was too focussed on Isagi to see the bigger picture of the match. Hiori turns around, points at Rin, and tells him “if ya want a goal… come at me with an unpredictable script!”
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a3691efc1f33d8ffef8d82a0b29cb973/9984c348cc0a5f68-6a/s540x810/bb4abf4a98baedb8fa2f77472830e8faf0753ba9.jpg)
Notice here how he isn’t simply putting Rin down for not being able to score. Hiori may be taunting Rin, perhaps getting over-confident, but he does still technically give Rin helpful advice. In a previous panel he explains how he was able to read Rin because Rin was too focussed on Isagi, and in combination with Hiori’s ‘unpredictable script’ line it forms some rather blunt and rude but nevertheless useful advice. Hiori is telling Rin exactly how to get past him and what Rin needs to do to improve. Notice the focus on unpredictability. I personally think this is a line foreshadowing Rin’s Destroyer mode, even if Hiori himself is unaware of it. Even if it’s not foreshadowing, Hiori’s advice is reasonable and Rin should listen to it.
The next moment we have of them together is from chapter 259, where Hiori is aided by Raichi to block Rin in a 2-person press, causing Rin to lose the ball. From a purely indulgent, shipping perspective, notice how Hiori’s and Rin’s legs are touching, their hands are on each other’s chests and they’re looking at each other. Raichi is just there lol.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/78787437dcf78a2e245c820e096f6f97/9984c348cc0a5f68-44/s540x810/e9bd223c90c75495d300d086d1fcce0b43eac761.jpg)
Next we have chapter 270, where Rin has started to awaken his Destroyer and is barrelling his way through BM’s various players. Hiori is one of the players Rin gets past with ease. Rin gets past him with a rainbow flick, to which Hiori acknowledges Rin awakening by saying ‘he is good’. Note here that he is the only player on BM’s side to get actual dialogue in response to Rin overpowering them.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/dffe3b6ab00a3065b72d9f3e9df49360/9984c348cc0a5f68-2e/s1280x1920/9f4a34172abd601737a1fd56df4ba0db089b7388.jpg)
And as of right now, the latest interaction comes from chapter 273. Rin has entered Destroyer mode and has completely overwhelmed Hiori. Isagi actually says in this chapter that Rin has become someone he can’t analyse, a completely unreadable beast of a player. I think this means the ‘unpredictable script’ Hiori spoke of truly is the Destroyer, and Rin has finally been able to get past Hiori with it.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/dc7f3630033c86d7c96fa004646fd17d/9984c348cc0a5f68-6e/s540x810/8ec1700fc8161ac5c62b45820d9f770a920738e9.jpg)
This may be it for their canon interactions, however it’s far from all the canon information we have about them that’s interesting for the dynamic. A big part of the hiorin ship is about looking at their individual information and drawing together similarities and/or parallels. While on the surface they seem very different, almost opposites, digging a little deeper reveals a lot of small coincidences about them that build up to make you realise that they’re a lot more similar than you might initially think.
Part 2 — Where Hiori and Rin Align
Analytical players. Both of them are capable of deeply analytical play styles that utilises field vision and high levels of technical skills. This way of playing doesn’t rely on brute strength or pure intimidation to get through the opponents’ defence, rather analysis, playing with and overcoming their opponents with strategy and out-playing their opponents with sheer levels of skill. This similarity is likely what led to them to be able to so easily link up when they first met. Rin is however also capable of being the Destroyer, which leads me to my second point below.
Sadism. Both are known sadists. Rin’s Destroyer mode is particularly sadistic, aiming to destroy in every way to the point where he will give up goal opportunities to destroy even more. In general, he revels in being at the top, destroying others under him. He’s open with his insults and destroys chaotically, looking for breaks in his opponents’ defence and completely tearing them down until there’s no hope of his opponents winning. Meanwhile Hiori is a self-proclaimed “ultra-sadist”. After his arc, he enjoys watching his opponents scramble to try and keep up with him only to be destroyed by his top-tier plays, especially in a ‘best play’ scenario with his chosen striker of the moment. He’s also not loyal to any one striker and will leave them behind if they’re not playing up to his standards or goal vision. Hiori’s sadism also manifests as him teasing his friends, as we see in chapter 241 when he jokingly teases Isagi for getting shipped with Kaiser by BLTV fans.
Sae connections. Rin’s connections to Sae are obvious, since they’re brothers and Sae is the cornerstone of Rin’s character arc. Hiori also has connections to Sae though. He’s been compared to Sae twice in-universe, once by Sendou in chapter 129 who said his passes had the same level of skill as Sae’s, and once by Yukimiya in chapter 241 who thinks Hiori’s ultra-sadist mindset is similar to Sae’s. In the Egoist Bible 2, Hiori states that he admires Sae as a player when answering the question ‘who has the best crossing skills’.
Replacements. In Rin’s light novel, he tells Sae that once Sae is gone, he’ll “find a replacement”. In chapter 239, Hiori tells Isagi that he won’t just be loyal to Isagi and will happily replace him with another striker should they be in a better position for Hiori’s vision.
They’re both gamers. Obviously we know Hiori is one. That’s been a big part of his character ever since we first met him. In his Egoist Bible profile, he states that he plays many genres, from JRPGs to rhythm games. However, Rin also plays video games, specifically horror games. We get this info from both the Egoist Bible and his prequel light novel, where it explains that he plays horror games to de-stress at night: (chapter 2) “… even games, should be chilling and scary. Playing horror games alone at night is quite thrilling”.
Horror, gore and zombies. As well as playing horror games to de-stress, it’s explained in the Egoist Bible and Rin’s light novel that he watches horror movies for the same reason: (chapter 2) “When he’s done, he watches a horror movie and then goes to bed. This is his daily routine. For some reason, since Sae has been gone, he only watches horror movies. Movies, videos …”. The light novel slightly expands on this to specify that he enjoys splatter films, as well as showing an illustration of him watching rather a gory zombie movie: (chapter 4) “Lately, he's been into splatter films. The one where a killer comes out with an electric saw and a big-ass ax, then blood splatters all over the place. The one where a killer chases you no matter how hard you try to escape, and if you get caught, you end up being dismembered. His heart is pounding, but he’s not the type to show on his face, so Rin watching the slaughter scene without any expression on his face is much more horrifying”. Likewise, Hiori is shown in chapter 206 playing a zombie shooter in which he imagines the zombies becoming his parents and he violently kills them. We see his inner monologue of this in his prequel light novel, showing the depths of how much he wants them to suffer: (chapter 6) “Before he knew it, in his imagination, his parents became zombies. His father and mother are coming towards him, laughing. He shoots without hesitation. Bang! Headshot. The bullet that entered the father's jaw blew off the back of his head. Bang! Bang! His mother's eyeballs pop out and there's a hole in her chest. He aims for vital spots with rapid fire, but they don't fall easily because they're zombies”. His Egoist Bible also confirms that he plays Dead By Daylight, which is a multiplayer horror game. Bonus point: Hiori’s favourite movie, Ready Player One, features an important series of scenes where the main characters have to explore a replica of the hotel from The Shining. The Shining is Rin’s favourite movie.
Solitude. Rin is ranked as the most anti-social member of Blue Lock in the Egoist Bible. He says he “doesn’t have time for lukewarm conversations” (although I do think on some level he longs for approval and love from someone, given how much he craves his brother’s attention). He is also one of the only characters who genuinely has no friends in Blue Lock. He tolerated Bachira for a time and trained Nanase begrudgingly, but no one is very close with him at all. Now, at a glance Hiori might seem far more social. He has a lot of friends and seems to enjoy hanging out with them. However, in his Egoist Bible entry it was revealed that his ideal type in a romantic partner is “someone who can leave me alone”. The wording he used — 放置し合えるん — seems to imply a reciprocal nature of this ‘leaving alone’, ie ‘you leave me alone, I’ll leave you alone’. Now tell me that arrangement wouldn’t work perfectly for Rin? Hiori is also shown in chapter 172 (which is before his character arc) spending time alone in the BM dorms while the others are out training. Furthermore, in Karasu’s ‘a day in Blue Lock’ in The Egoist Bible 2, he states that he and Hiori were in the communal bath together but did not talk or interact, and this was fine. While Hiori can enjoy socialising, he also needs plenty of time to himself to the point where it becomes a deal-breaker in a relationship for him.
Fetish. Hiori’s fetish according to the Egoist Bible is ‘fractured girl fetish’ and seems to refer to seeing injuries bandaged up (given that the actress he uses as an example wears a cast on her arm in the movie he’s referencing). Out of all the characters in Blue Lock, Rin is the one we’ve seen get injured multiple times, and in chapter 271 it was confirmed that this is a part of his nature. This was a part of him that was disapproved of by his parents and classmates, so Hiori actually liking it would be a massive relief.
Ochazuke (tea on rice). Rin’s favourite food according to the Egoist Bible is ochazuke, specifically taichazuke. In the Episode Rin extra chapter we see him going to enjoy some taichazuke at a traditional restaurant because he was hungry for ochazuke. When Hiori was asked in the Egoist Bible 2 what his favourite accompaniment for rice is, he replied that it’s the ochazuke brand Nagatanien.
Stripes. Rin’s casual outfits for both the Shibuya collab (designed by Nomura) and Episode Rin feature a striped/ribbed pattern. Likewise, Hiori’s casual pyjamas, childhood design and one of Nomura’s coaster designs feature him wearing striped clothing.
Egoist Bible rankings. In the Egoist Bible 2, they were ranked first and second most likely to have psychic powers. Hiori was also voted the best listener, meanwhile Rin was voted the worst.
Eyelashes. Both of them have long lashes. That’s kinda it for this one lol.
Water connections. Hiori’s favourite season is the rainy season and he has been referred to as ‘water coloured’ in the manga due to his hair colour (it means ‘cyan’ in Japanese — see point 14). Rin’s aura is water and he is regularly connected to the sea in his hometown of Kamakura.
Name kanji (yes, I’m in this deep). In Rin’s surname, the kanji 糸 means ‘thread/yarn’. In Hiori’s surname, the kanji 織 means ‘weaver’. Both of them have kanji relating to weaving, likely in relation to both Rin’s Puppeteer play style (and Sae’s insane control of the midfield), and Hiori’s way of ‘weaving’ together a best play through his skills (and his parents ‘weaving’ his life for him rather than letting him control it himself). To get even more conspiracy theorist-y, when Charles meets Hiori he calls Hiori “水色お兄さん” — literally ‘water-coloured big brother’, likely in relation to his hair colour because 水色 can also mean ‘cyan’. To keep it on the topic of water though, whose aura is made of water? That’s right. Rin’s! (yes I know this is really grasping at straws but I did say this post was for EVERYTHING hiorin).
A wild one here — dates. The exact age gap between Hiori and Rin is 9 months 9 days. 09/09 is Rin’s birthday.
Part 3 — Family Relationships: Love, Expectations and Abandonment
Rin and Hiori both have relationships with particular members of their family that are similar and also unique among the rest of the cast. For Rin, it’s his relationship with Sae. For Hiori, it’s his relationship with his parents.
To begin with Hiori, his parents only wanted a child who could fulfil their dream of being number one in the world at a particular sport. They held this expectation of him throughout his whole life, pretending to genuinely care about and love him when in reality all they wanted was for him to be the best. If he tried to step out of line, they’d become monstrous, as seen in his light novel: (chapter 2) “Can I take a day off from soccer tomorrow and go play with my friends?” As soon as he said this, the smiles disappeared from his parents’ faces. His mother looked very surprised, and then she made the scariest face he's ever seen. “......!” He doesn’t remember what she said. He just remembers that he was scolded terribly. After that, he was hugged tightly. “Hiori, you are born to be the best at soccer.” “You can play with other kids anytime you want.” “But if you don’t do soccer properly from now on, you will never be the best.” His mother was desperate. His father was behind her, looking sadly at Hiori. “Please, Hiori, trust us and play soccer.” Hiori felt that he had done something very wrong. … What should I do? I said something bad. I'm sorry. The air was stifling, as if he had been locked in a room full of needles. He felt like he would get hurt if he moved, so all Hiori could do was nod.” We also see the extent of this in chapter 206, when Hiori overhears his parents threatening to get a divorce if he isn’t the best. This makes him realise that if he doesn’t fulfil their expectations, his parents don’t want him. In essence, they would abandon him, letting their family fall apart and blaming it all on him.
With Rin, it’s a bit more complicated. His relationship with his older brother Sae is still pretty up in the air as to what really happened from Sae’s perspective. We need to distinguish between what actually happened (which is difficult to determine as of right now) and what Rin interpreted as happening. From his perspective, he has a moment in chapter 125 where he thinks Sae pretended to love him while they were growing up, only using him as a stepping stone to get to the world stage. After that had been achieved, Rin presumes was abandoned. This is unlikely true though (even if it’s tricky to discern for now). This is where I cry on deaf ears for a Sae light novel or spin-off chapter, anything to get his side of the story. My current PERSONAL interpretation of canon is that Sae still loves Rin, however he knows that Rin’s desire to be the world’s best as a duo is impossible, and his way of trying to ween Rin off such a dream was to sever their relationship, he just went about it in perhaps the worst way possible. No matter what really happened though, I’m more interested in what Rin interpreted from being abandoned, which is a mix of hatred and confusion but also still a desire for recognition.
This to me reads as very similar to what Hiori’s relationship with his parents used to be before his arc. Hiori hated his parents. He wished death upon them. And yet, despite that he kept fighting for what they wanted, fulfilling their expectations because he was so afraid that if he didn’t, all the blame would be placed on him for their family falling apart. Rin’s situation is sort of a dark mirror to Hiori’s, where instead of just fearing that abandonment, Rin was abandoned, with all the blame being placed on him by Sae. And just like Hiori, until his own awakening took place he himself was fighting for Sae’s approval again, trying to find any way he can to fulfil Sae’s expectations. We see this in the way Rin chose Isagi to be his rival after the U20 match not because of anything in particular that Isagi has done, but because Sae acknowledged Isagi. We see Rin’s desire for love in the way he travelled to Tokyo in the Episode Rin extra chapter to possibly watch Sae’s match, even though they’d already fallen out by that point. We even saw this limitation as recently as chapter 273, where Rin gives up a goal opportunity because, to him, Sae wouldn’t approve of it. His awakening has hopefully gone in a similar direction to Hiori’s, where he is now learning to play for himself.
Rin and Hiori both strove for love from their families and are now in the process of breaking from this mindset and fight only for themselves. This complicated relationship with love, expectations and abandonment is what draws me to a lot of hiorin’s potential. They both exist along a trajectory of breaking free from their families’ expectations, with Hiori having decided to not try to appease his family anymore and Rin having just started to unlock the true depths of his destruction without the need for Sae.
Part 4 — Headcanons: Some Fun Ideas
Anything from this point on is pure headcanon, taking into account all the canon information listed in the previous sections. This is NOT ‘speculation’. I genuinely don’t think any of this will be canon. Kaneshiro hasn’t consciously laid the groundwork for Rin and Hiori to interact but he has done so by accident and all the pieces are in place. This section is all about some fun ideas I’ve had about hiorin, mostly trying to use canon as a strong basis so that they make sense. These can range from canon-adjacent to domestic AU material, it’s a whole mix really. I’ll probably come back to this bit every now and again to update it with new ideas I have, so keep an eye out for that.
A shared understanding. Since they’re both familiar with what they perceive to be feelings of false love from family members, it creates a situation where they can understand why they act the way they do better than anyone else. I hc that this would help them to more naturally form link-ups on the field, since they’d be in tune with each other’s mental states as well as general play styles. Off-field they’d be able to recognise when something has ticked the other off or resurfaced some unpleasant memories. I don’t think they’d really be ones to talk about their family traumas to each other openly, but they’d have an understanding of the things they do find out and wouldn’t think the other is overreacting, especially Hiori understanding Rin. Hiori was voted the best listener, so while Rin likely would not open up much, if at all, Hiori would always be willing to listen to him. While I think it’s good that Rin has friends like Nanase who he can be more chilled out with, I personally prefer the idea that his partner is someone who can actually understand the depths of his issues and sit with him in the eye of the storm until it passes, rather than trying to just ‘fix’ him without being able to understand him properly.
Touch-starved and both slow to physical affection. Since they’re both introverted and Rin is emotionally constipated as hell, they aren’t really a couple that would be very into PDA. Not even hand-holding. But it doesn’t really matter for them. They’re both not very used to that sort of physical comfort especially in the presence of others. However, while I think in general Rin might be a bit more reluctant to initiate intimacy than Hiori, I do think he’d still be more inclined to initiate hugs. Why Rin of all people? Because he grew up with a sibling. And he was a younger sibling at that. On some level he would have received attention from Sae while their relationship was still good, even if only a little bit. Hiori on the other hand grew up an only child in a household where hugs and doting were used as a tool to manipulate him. He’d likely not be used to the idea of hugs as a genuine show of affection. But Rin’s hugs are always genuine and often given out sparingly and tentatively, after a lot of hesitation. They’re both slow to physical affection but they’d find a way to navigate their wants and needs together, taking their time.
All-nighter horror dates. Be it playing co-op horror games or binging horror movies in the dark, I think they’d both prefer that as a date night over going out to a restaurant. It’s an activity they can both have fun with as a shared interest, just the two of them, alone at home with no need to even leave the house. They can let themselves get more passionate and competitive (and sadistic) while playing horror games too. I particularly think they would play Dead By Daylight together a lot, with Hiori maining a killer since he said that’s what he would play in the Egoist Bible 2.0 and Rin playing a survivor since that allows him to fight for his life until death, something he strives for in life.
Owl eyes. According to the Egoist Bible, Rin’s favourite animal is owls (a lot of Nomura’s Rin drawings also feature owls, he has a plushie of an owl in chapter 270 and he wears a ‘fukurou’ (owl) bag in the Episode Rin extra chapter). It is also a fandom-wide thing to say that Hiori has giant eyes. While most people compare Hiori’s eyes to bugs, I’d like to offer comparing them to owl eyes — giant, round, staring into your soul maybe a bit too much. Hiori has owl eyes and Rin loves owls, so I headcanon that Rin would love Hiori’s large, curious eyes more than anyone.
Yoga together. While we only have canonical confirmation that Rin both regularly does yoga and is good at it, I hc that Hiori would also be quite good at it due to his parents likely drilling him with intense schedules and being helicopter parents about his health. Yoga would likely fall into it somewhere as a cool-down activity and a good way to exercise on rainy days. While Hiori initially wouldn’t find yoga fun to do with Rin due to his negative associations with it, I feel like over time it could be a nice bonding activity for the two of them. It requires minimal talking if they’re doing their own routines, and as long as Hiori isn’t messing up the moves I think Rin would tolerate the two of them existing in the same space. At the very least, Hiori wouldn’t try to one-up Rin with moves he can’t do and topple onto Rin as a result (looking at you, Isagi…). They wouldn’t do couples yoga though, just their own thing in the same space.
Sharing food. In the Twitter QnAs, it states that Hiori’s favourite food is salt-grilled saury (saury shiyoyaki) “including the bitter bits”. His least favourite food is cotton candy because “it’s just sugar”. Therefore, I hc that he tends to enjoy bitter food while disliking sweet food. In contrast, we know that Rin quite likes sweet food because he used to eat ice cream with Sae on the way home from practice, plus in the Episode Rin extra chapter he enjoys most blanc at a dessert cafe. Because of this difference in tastes, I like to hc Hiori giving any sweet food Blue Lock offers in their meals to Rin. Likewise, if the main meal Rin is given is ever burnt or charred too much for his liking, he gives the charred bits to Hiori since he knows Hiori will eat them so the food won’t be wasted.
Tea and coffee. As an addendum to the previous hc, I think Hiori would be a coffee drinker and Rin would be a tea drinker. This is because coffee tends to be more bitter, especially ones without sugar like espressos, so I can see Hiori preferring them to tea. There’s also the idea that ochazuke is made with tea, which is a bonus for Rin liking tea over coffee.
Cooking. Last food-related one I promise! While Hiori likely has a ton of technical knowledge about nutrition, dieting, calorie counting etc… due to his mother’s frenzied control of his diet growing up, I headcanon that he doesn’t actually have a clue how to cook. Once again, this is because of his parents being overprotective and worrying that he’d injure himself with a kitchen knife or burn himself on the stovetop. So he has zero clue about where to start in the kitchen. On the flip-side, while Rin isn’t the best cook in the world I reckon he’d have somewhat of an idea of how to cook the basics, plus he likely also has knowledge of dieting and nutrition for the sake of his own health. So while they’d both have things to learn in the kitchen, it would be Rin doing more of the actual cooking while Hiori decides what meals to eat to optimise their health and training.
A joint-aura that’s a blizzard — in the event that they ever were to team up on the field, I think that the aura they’d give off together should be a blizzard. It makes sense to me for them to have this because Hiori has ice associations with the kanji 氷 in his surname, which means ‘ice’, and in chapter 239 when he gives his monologue about finding a reason to play, a metaphorical key appears with a snowflake on it to symbolise his newfound resolve. Rin’s connections to snow are less positive though, since it was snowing the day that Sae abandoned him. I think making their joint aura a blizzard could symbolise both Hiori’s ultra-sadist resolve to play, and Rin finally being able to move on from Sae to associate the snow with his sadistic determination. A snowstorm joint-aura would also emphasise the pair of them having a sadistic, destructive take-down of their opponents.
Hurt/comfort. Given Hiori’s fetish and Rin’s predisposition to violence and injury, I love the idea of Hiori being the one to bandage Rin up when he gets hurt. From the U20 match we know that Hiori’s first instinct is to ask Rin if he’s alright and help him, but since his fetish is for this sort of thing I highly doubt he would scold Rin, chastise him or tell him to try his best not to get hurt anymore. Rather, he would accept Rin the way he is, tend to his injuries without pity or complaint, and Rin would be able to have someone be there for him who doesn’t look down on him for being destructive. We see in Rin’s flashback chapters during PXG that he was nervous about getting scolded by his parents, which is why I think Hiori’s acceptance would be so important to him.
Hiori has a type. His canon type is already ‘someone who will leave me alone’ as I previously discussed in section 2. However, I do like to semi-jokingly say that his type is also ‘dark-haired, analytical guys with an attitude who are really good at football’. Obviously this is meant to refer mostly to Isagi and Karasu (we’ve all seen the heart-eyes you give them, Hiori!), but it is amusing to me that the description also fits Rin perfectly.
Part 5 — Transformative Works I Recommend For New Shippers
These are just some of my favourite fanfics all linked together in one place. I’ll start with a shameless plug of my own fic:
14 Days To NOT Fall In Love (but guess who did anyway)
Summary: This annoyingly mandated break of Ego's was only fourteen days long. That would never be enough time for Rin to fall for this aggravatingly sweet, understanding, level-headed, cyan-haired gamer boy... Okay, maybe he'd need to exercise SOME restraint. Aka: how Rin and Hiori become mutually pining idiots after the U-20 match through a combination of video games, late night discord calls and learning that perhaps they're not all that different after all.
(Chapters: 10 , Word Count: 67088 , Rating: T)
And now for my personal favourites I think new shippers will enjoy, in no particular order (if any of the authors see this and have tumblrs you want me to tag, lmk!):
catch us in the morning by transrightssokka (kellallyourfriends)
Summary: Hiori looks down and brings his hand up to his mouth, hiding a faint smile. “You don’t wanna go home, do you?” “No shit, I don’t,” Rin says. He’d rather sleep on the sidewalk than spend the next two weeks with Sae. Hiori is silent for a minute. His pretty eyes flick to his feet. Up to the back of the seat in front of them. Over to Rin. “So.” “So?” Rin says. Hiori lowers his voice. “So, what if we didn’t?”
(Chapters: 3 , Word Count: 27206 , Rated: M)
Even When It’s Starless by saturnshots
Summary: Everyone’s had an imaginary friend or two — it’s not often they change the course of your life, but who says being imaginary could stop them from bringing your dreams come true?
(Chapters: 1 , Word Count: 2838 , Rating: G)
sine wave by starstruckdove
Summary: Rin discovers Bachira’s “super secret surprise” sooner than he’d thought. There’s a new boy standing next to Ego at practice, and Rin knows he’s new because each of his unfortunate teammates have made their presence (loudly and raucously) known in his life. The boy has a nice face–wide eyes and soft mouth, all rounded corners instead of sharp edges. His hair is a shocking shade of blue and Rin finds it almost familiar. “This is your new manager,” Ego says with about as much energy as a dead battery.
(Chapters: 1 , Word Count: 8990 , Rated: T)
Daydreaming by em_hiorin
Summary: Hiori can’t seem to concentrate during practice, as a certain Itoshi has been plaguing his mind.
(Chapters: 1 , Word Count: 1560 , Rating: G)
My family thinks we’re dating. by akiangelsolos
Summary: “Oh, I see.” His mother hummed, placing her silver fork down on the table. “You must be upset, Hiori hasn’t come over in a while. You have to be lonely without your boyfriend around.” “I’m not lonely-” Rin shot his eyes at his mom, “What did you just say?”
(Chapters: 2 , Word Count: 5486 , Rating: G)
In Your Perfect Eyes by kodzuma
Summary: Rin and Hiori share a quiet evening at Rin's house.
(Chapters: 1 , Word Count: 1384 , Rating: G)
Part 6 — Wow, You Made It This Far? Congratulations And Thank You!
If you’ve made it this far, then I am both immensely thankful and I applaud you. Seriously, thank you for putting up with my insane, delusional brainrot over this silly rarepair that has barely any canon backing to speak of. Hopefully if anything, you now understand why people are starting to take interest in the ship (or at least why I enjoy it). And if you’re a shipper now, welcome to the club! You will now have to watch Hiori and Rin never affect each other’s development, never interact in any meaningful capacity and you’ll be eternally bitter about it 👍. For any aspiring fic writers, I hope this can be a nice hub of info for all of you if you want to consult the hiorin ‘dynamic’ (i say in quotations because let’s face it, I made up like 95% of the dynamic based on analysis and a canon dynamic doesn’t actually exist). Also, bear in mind that in the off chance we do get some more moments, I plan to update this post. So you may end up being subject to even more brainrot in the future.
Until that day comes though, I can only thank you once again. Hiorin is my otp and no matter how much Kaneshiro doesn’t make it come to fruition, he will have to try incredibly hard to make me stop shipping them. The dynamic can change. They can become more and more ‘incompatible’. I don’t care. If hiorin has no shippers, I have passed on from this world.
#blue lock#bllk#hiorin#hiori yo#itoshi rin#blue lock hiori#blue lock rin#FINALLY this post is finished!!!#I’ve been working on it for weeks#it’s mostly for myself ngl#just a nice place to compile all my screaming into one clump#might as well share it with the world yk?#I hope it makes even a modicum of sense to any unsuspecting readers who don’t ship it#rinhio#rnho
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Wheels of misfortune (a Nightmare angst fic)
Based on these two posts by @unknownchoatic :)
I don't know ANYTHING about disability as I am not disabled myself, so please excuse the inaccuracies and misinterpretations :')
Also English isn't my first language so there might be grammatical errors :')
I'll proof read later
Tw: paralysis (???), mention of bullying, self hatred
It was late, the moon was high in the sky and everyone in the castle was sleeping. Everyone but Nightmare. He was wide awake, laying on his bed looking at the ceiling. He had been feeling quite unwell these past few days, he wasn't sick, but he could feel his body being heavy, especially his legs. There had been a fight with his brother recently, but he didn't recall being hurt, he came back tired because of the positivity, sure, but he wasn't hurt, so why was he feeling that way ?
He sat on the edge of his bed, sighing, and pushed on his arms to get up, feeling his legs shake under his weight. He looked at his private bathroom door at the back of his room, for a moment it seemed to be so far away from him that he thought of getting back on the bed. He shook his head, what was he thinking ? It was barely a few meters away.
He made a step forward, grabbed the wall for support when he tripped on the rug, it was the first time he ever tripped on this rug, and slowly made his way to the bathroom. He was exhausted, his back hurt, it had always hurt since he acquired his tentacles, but recently the pain had became a lot more overwhelming, and even when he didn't summon them, like now, it still hurt, even if the tentacles weren't there. He never summoned them when he was at home, he didn't want to bump into things. He knelt in front of the bathtub and opened the faucet, watching the warm water run for a while before starting to get undressed, sitting on the floor. He looked at himself in the mirror, inspecting his bones in search for any cracks, maybe he had been hurt after all, maybe he just didn't notice, but everything was fine, there was no injuries.
When the tub was full he closed the faucet, grabbed some essential oils bottle to put some drops in the bath, and finally got in, sighing in relief as he felt the warm water sooth the pain away. He closed his eye, relaxing a bit, he focused on the different emotions in the castle and only felt peace and contentment. Good. That meant his boys weren't having any bad dreams, they were sleeping peacefully. He would always make sure they were okay, they were all that he had, they were his family, he would always protect them, no matter what.
He relaxed in the tub for a good hour before getting up, the water was cold now. He grabbed a towel to wrap himself in and got out of the tub, letting the water drain in the pipes. After only two steps he grabbed the sink for support, his legs were shaking badly. He muttered a curse under his breath, bending over to grab a short and a t-shirt for the night which he struggled to put on before getting out of the bathroom.
He flopped on his bed and crawled under the covers, maybe tomorrow he will feel better, he just needed to sleep a little...
When the sun shone through the curtains Nightmare let out an annoyed growl, he was still feeling so heavy, his back still hurt and his legs... weren't hurting... he didn't feel anything in his legs... His eye shot open as he sat up straight, throwing the covers aside. His legs were still there. Of course his legs were still there, how stupid could he be, thinking they would have disappeared ? He tried to sit on the edge of his bed, but nothing happened, he didn't move...
- What the f#ck... ?
He muttered, stress starting to settle in his soul as he tried in vain to move his legs. His breath fastened slightly, he brushed his hand against his tibia, he could barely feel it, he tried again on the other leg, rubbed his feet, his femur, his knees, but he didn't feel the touch, he was just... numb.
He grabbed the nightstand in a hurry pulling himself out of bed by force, his soul was beating too fast for him to remain calm. He fell, taking a lamp with him in his fall, it shattered on impact, he tried to get up again, to hold onto the nightstand and push on his arms to get up, to stand on his legs, but they didn't move and he fell again, his breath was erratic. What was happening ? What was happening to him ? Why couldn't he move his legs ? Why couldn't he get up ? Was that a nightmare ? Was he gonna wake up soon ? His arms hurt, it wasn't a nightmare.
- HORROR !!!
He yelled on the top of his magic lungs without thinking about it, feeling tears forming in his eye. Was he going to die ?
His door shot open, a very panicked Horror hasted in his room, for his boss to scream like that, something bad surely happened. His red eye quickly scanned the room before he spot Nightmare on the ground next to a broken lamp.
- I can't move them.. ! I can't.. !
Nightmare struggled to say, shocking on his tears, he couldn't form any coherent sentence, clearly having a panic attack. Horror rushed to him, he had never seen Nightmare in such a state...
- It's okay boss, I'll carry you to your bed.. ! Don't move.. !
He tried to reassure him as he gently but rapidly took him in his arms to lift him off the ground, sitting him on the bed and sitting next to him. Nightmare clung onto his henchman's jacket, burying his face against his chest, praying that it was in fact a bad dream. Horror held him in his arms, not understanding what was going on, all he knew was that his boss needed comfort so he would give him that. He gently rubbed his back, letting Nightmare cry against him.
- It's okay boss.. I'm here..
He gently soothed, feeling the little body of the black skeleton shaking like a leaf against him. When Nightmare finally managed to catch his breath and cease his crying, which took a few minutes, he looked up, still shaking slightly, only to see that his two remaining henchmen were in his room too, worried by all the noise, Dust looked like he just woke up, still in his pajamas. He didn't like that. He didn't like worrying his teammates, he was supposed to protect them, not make them worry. Killer was the first to speak.
- What happened ?
Nightmare took a few seconds to answer, he still didn't want to believe it himself, but the proof was that he was still trying to make his legs move without success.
- I can't feel my legs...
He answered with a weak voice, a voice he hated more than anything, a voice that reminded him of just how pathetic he could be, just like when he was a kid.
- What do you mean you can't feel your legs ?
Dust asked, a little confused.
- I can't feel them.. ! I can't feel any touch, I can't move them, I can't stand up, I.. !
- Shhht, calm down, take a deep breath..
Horror cut him, feeling him tense again. Nightmare pressed himself against the bigger skeleton, as much as he hated showing such vulnerability, he really needed comfort right now...
Killer frowned, looking at him almost accusingly.
- I told you to get a check up, you were hurting too much for it to be normal.
- You're not helping.
Dust scolded him. Nightmare was already in a bad state, no need to point at what he should have done, he already knew it.
- Horror, go make him something to eat, I'll help him get dressed, Killer try to see if you can find something in an AU to help him walk.
Dust commanded, he was the most responsible out of the three, he was kinda the second in command when Nightmare couldn't assume his leader role, like now. Killer scowled, he didn't like receiving orders from someone other than Nightmare, but for now he clearly couldn't think straight and they needed to help him, so he obliged and teleported in an AU to steal something.
Nightmare first tightened his grip on Horror's jacket when he felt him move but quickly let him go when Dust took his place. He watched as the big skeleton left his room.
- You feel like going to the bathroom or you want me to bring you your clothes here ?
Nightmare looked at Dust, he almost expected mockery, but Dust was genuine, he sincerely wanted to help. The goopy skeleton shook his head.
- Bring it please..
Dust nodded and went to the bathroom looking for his boss's clothes. Nightmare looked at him go, confused, he trusted them of course, but deep inside he was always so scared that they might leave him if he became too weak, that they might laugh at him for showing vulnerability like they laughed at him. The villagers. They would always mock him, make him feel weak and pathetic, he hated that, he hated that feeling, he wanted to be strong, to fight back, but he just couldn't, they were stronger than him, always.
Dust came back, clothes in hand.
- You need help ?
Nightmare was cut in his sad memories. He looked up at him.
- No, thank you..
- I'll turn around while you change, if you need help just ask.
Nightmare nodded, grabbing the clothes. He waited for Dust to turn his back before taking off his t-shirt, putting on a sweater and his jacket, then he stopped, looking at his legs. He tried to move them. Nothing happened. How was he going to take off his short and put on his sweatpants ? He looked up at Dust again, maybe he could ask him... ? No. No he wouldn't ask him. Dust wasn't a nurse, he was his henchman, it wasn't his job to get him dressed. He could do it himself, no need to bother him. He crawled on the middle of his bed and tried to push on his arms just enough to lift his pelvis off the mattress and slide off his short.
- You sure you don't need help ?
Dust asked, hearing the noise of the bedsheets.
- Yes.
Nightmare blushed, he was in his underwear, Dust couldn't turn around now ! He sat up again, tried to move his legs, failed, and manually lifted his knees in front of his ribcage to slide his feet in the leg holes of the sweatpants. He didn't even feel the cotton of the pants against his legs, it was like he was dressing the air and not himself, it didn't feel right. He then did the same thing he did to take off his short: lifted his pelvis as much as he could to pull the pants up. All that just for a pair of pants... what a waste of time. If only he had listened to Killer when he told him that it wasn't normal for his back to hurt this much, but he was just too stubborn to admit that the pain was barely bearable. To admit being weak.
- I'm done...
- Yeah ?
Dust turned around again, pleased to see that the goopy skeleton managed to dress himself alone, not that he wouldn't have helped, but it would have been awkward for both of them. He got closer to him and knelt in front of the bed, turning his back again.
- Put your arms around my shoulders, I'll carry you to the kitchen.
Nightmare looked at him, hesitantly getting closer to the edge of the bed.
- You're sure... ?
- You still can't move your legs, can you ?
No, he couldn't. He tried again and he still couldn't.
- Come one, you know Horror doesn't like it when we make the food wait.
Horror had strict rules with food, such as: no waste, two meals a day minimum, everyone eats together, and when the food is ready no one should be late or else it would be cold. Nightmare didn't want to upset the bigger skeleton so he reluctantly wrapped his arms around Dust's shoulders and watched him grab his legs to wrap them around his waist. Good thing he didn't have his tentacles summoned, he was much lighter and easy to carry without them.
It felt wrong. It felt so wrong to be carried like that, like a baby who couldn't move by himself. It was pathetic. He was pathetic. He just wanted to dissappear right now, to go to sleep and not wake up until all of his problems were gone.
Dust sat him on a chair, in front of the kitchen table. Horror had already put a plate in front of him: pancakes, he also had a cup of hot cocoa.
- Thanks...
Sometimes he felt like he didn't deserve them, he didn't deserve their love, their kindness, he deserved nothing... but he was so damn glad he had them because he loved them oh so dearly...
Killer teleported back in the kitchen, a wheelchair next to him. Nightmare looked at it. He didn't like it. He didn't want to sit in a wheelchair. He didn't want that, it was too... too much, too drastic, he didn't want that, he didn't want to just give up on his legs just yet. He felt his eye tingle. He didn't want to cry either, not again. He blinked to chase the tingling sensation away.
- I don't want that thing.
- It's the most suitable for you right now.
Killer countered. Nightmare frowned, blinking again.
- Why didn't you bring a cane ? Or at least crutches ?
- Because you need to at least be able to stand up to use those and you obviously can't.
Killer didn't have any filters when he talked, that was one of the side effects of not being able to feel fully, he was brutally honest because he didn't care if he hurt someone with the truth, it was always better than lying.
Nightmare blinked. One time. Two times. When he spoke his voice was shaking.
- I don't want a wheelchair.
- You don't really have another option right now.
- Killer.
Horror stopped him, seeing how Nightmare's hands had begun to shake.
- It will be temporary, just the time we find another solution.
He tried to reassure him. Nightmare looked at him, he doubted there would be another solution.
- You won't have to go outside with it, no one has to see you.
Nightmare didn't want anyone else to see him like that anyway.
- I'm gonna put you on it, okay ?
Horror said as he got closer to him. His breath fastened when the bigger skeleton lifted him from the chair to help him settle on the wheelchair. He felt his soul clench, his ribcage burn and his cheeks tingle again. He tried to move his legs, to show he didn't need this wheelchair, that he could still walk... nothing happened.
Dust left the kitchen to get dressed.
Horror took the empty plate and cup to wash them.
Killer went to the living room, feeling he wouldn't be of any help in the kitchen.
Nightmare didn't move.
He tried to move his legs.
Nothing happened.
He looked down.
A tear fell on his hand.
Was this going to be his life now ? Was he gonna spend the rest of eternity on a f#cking wheelchair ? It was ridiculous. He was the king of nightmares, the guardian of negativity ! And he just couldn't walk ? He could alter the balance of the whole multiverse but he couldn't move his legs ? The villagers would have loved to hear that. He felt so useless right now.
He stayed in the kitchen all morning, unable to bring himself to push on the wheels.
The week passed slowly, it was like he was in a fog all day, trying to move his legs, failing, trying again, failing again. His boys helped him as much as they could, grabbing things that were to high for him to reach, helping him with the stairs... he felt numb. All over. He couldn't bring himself to face the mirror, he didn't want to see his reflection, he didn't want to see these wheels.
He was in the library, he wanted to clear his thoughts, think of something else. He looked at the books, the one he wanted was on a shelf, a little high, he couldn't reach it when sitting down. He didn't want to call. He wanted to grab his book himself. He didn't want to be dependant.
He sat on the edge of the wheelchair, grabbing the shelf in front of him and pulling on his arms to lift his body, using the shelves as a sort of climbing hold. He stretched his free arm to the maximum and managed to grab the book. The wheelchair rolled back. He lost his grip on the shelf.
Horror heard a loud noise coming from the library, and he knew that the only ones to go to that room were Dust and Nightmare, and Dust was currently in the living room. He rushed, worried. What had Nightmare done ? Did he hurt himself ? When he entered it didn't take long for him to spot Nightmare on the ground, a book in hand and the wheelchair two meters away. The pieces assembled quickly. He sighed, coming to his side to help him sit on the chair again.
- Why didn't you call us ?
- I can do it myself.
- Was falling part of the plan ?
Nightmare's grip tightened on his book, he was looking at the ground. He felt so dumb. He felt like such a burden everyday, he wanted to do something himself, but of course he failed to do that too.
- Nightmare...
He looked up, Horror rarely called him by his name.
- Don't be scared to ask for help, we're here for you...
He knew he was being genuine when he said that.
- I don't want to bother you...
His voice was barely a whisper. He didn't like always calling for help, always monopolizing them, being so dependent on them, it just didn't feel right to him...
- You don't bother us. You never bothered us and you will never bother us. Okay ? We care about you, we're happy to help. You're not a burden to us. Don't forget that.
Nightmare felt his eye tingle again, but this time, he only felt warmth in his soul, hearing these words felt good... really good...
- You want me to make a pie for tonight ?
Horror changed the subject. Nightmare looked at him a little longer before nodding, making Horror smile.
- Okay, and if you need help, call us, will you ?
He nodded again. Horror gently pat his skull before leaving the library.
Nightmare was lucky to have them, he knew that, and as much as he hated his condition, at least, he wasn't alone...
- end -
#original post#fanfiction#fanfic#undertale fanfic#dreamtale fanfic#dreamtale fanfiction#disability#disable#disabled Nightmare#disabled nightmare sans#nightmare sans#dreamtale#dreamtale nightmare#nightmare angst#nightmare sans angst#bad sans#bad sanses#bad sanses gang#nightmare's gang#mtt#murder time trio#dust sans#horror sans#killer sans#dreamtale angst#disabled au
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Hi, its Patrick speaking.
Michael somehow locked up both of the camera creeps in the bathroom. I guess they were freaking him out while he was repairing the door or some shit? The footage is pretty much useless, which is a bit irritating…but I’ve transcribed the audio for you all here. I think its crucial to provide the full word-for-word conversation.
----
> welp…the hole has been patched. i will have to replace the entire door eventually but um, this will work for right now.
> …
> uh…
> ......
> habit?
> …YES?
> are you...upset about what i said earlier?
> WHAT? NO NO…IM FINE. > don’t even worry about it.
> …you’re lying.
> no i’m not—
> habit…i may be mentally unwell, but im not stupid. i know that look in your eyes. i know that tone in your voice. ive seen it all before - i was practically raised on the sadness of my institutionalized peers.
> IS THAT HOW YOU SEE THE HABIT? AS ONE OF THOSE PATHETIC FUCKING CRAZY HUMANS?
> ah…i wouldnt describe them that harshly but i mean, basically yeah? > they are just people with problems man…many of whom have done some fucked up things, patrick and myself included. mostly though, they are kinda just…sad. Because they keep fucking up, or getting fucked up, and they dont know how to stop it. evidently you are not much different from them or myself in that way
> so uh— i just wanna say that i’m sorry for my behavior. i was being a jackass and it was uncalled for. i wanted to believe you deserved that and much worse but…i dunno. spewing blind hatred like that doesnt sit right with me.
> ….... > no. don’t apologize.
> what? why not?
> nothing you said was inaccurate nor unjustified, michael. why be sorry about that?
> because, uh…you apologized to me first? an' well, thats unlike you. at least, its unlike whatever i thought of you before today. maybe patrick is onto something…and maybe i was little too quick to judgment.
> HA…ARE YOU SURE YOURE NOT STUPID? I’VE DESTROYED MORE THAN JUST YOUR DOOR. I KILLED—
> i know. i know. and i dunno if i’ll ever truly forgive you for taking my brother away…but like. i also can recognize the value of an apology. it’s a good start, if you really mean it.
> …
> do you mean it, habit? are you actually sorry?
> I HAVE NOTHING TO GAIN FROM LYING TO YOU.
> sure– unless you think appeasing me is what will keep yourself from being kicked out and left to die alone
[HABIT laughs]
> I’D BE A MORON TO SINCERELY BELIEVE THAT. YOU AND PATRICK HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BAR ME FROM THIS PLACE, AT ANY TIME, FOR ANY REASON. I ACCEPT THAT. I WOULD DESERVE IT. AND ONE WAY OR ANOTHER…I WILL DIE WITH ALL OF MY REGRETS RIGHT BESIDE ME.
> I APOLOGIZED BECAUSE, WELL…I BELIEVE YOU DESERVE ONE, WHILE I STILL HAVE THE TIME TO GIVE IT. ONE LESS REGRET TO TAKE TO THE GRAVE, EH? > there is no other reason.
> you believe i deserve an apology, huh...
> ERRR…YEAH. > I CANT PRETEND LIKE I FULLY UNDERSTAND ALL THE WAYS IN WHICH MY ACTIONS HAVE AFFECTED YOU…BUT UM...
> YOU LOST SOMEONE DEEPLY IMPORTANT TO YOU. I HAVE LOST SOMEONE RECENTLY TOO. AND UH, IT…HURTS. IT HURTS AND IM THE ONLY MONSTER TO BLAME. > IF THE PAIN I LIVE WITH NOW IS EVEN REMOTELY CLOSE TO WHAT I’VE DONE TO YOU…THEN YES…i am sorry.
> I KNOW THAT WILL NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH AND WONT FIX A DAMN THING...SO THROW ME OUT, IF YOU MUST. I WILL GO WITHOUT QUESTION.
> …
> …
> …
> …WELL?
> ...... . . . . . .........
> MICHAEL?
> …ugh…uh, hey…habit.
> ERR— PATRICK?
> heh…you got it…
> sorry im…still a bit fuzzy upstairs at the moment.
> UM. OKAY. SIT DOWN THEN?
[I flopped into the couch next to Habit, kinda bracing against him to ground myself.]
> SO UM– > IS MICHAEL ALRIGHT?
> Michael…? Oh right. > He’s fine.
> …THAT'S ALL? JUST FINE?
> Ugh– dude my head is killing me right now, gimme a break…
> OH. SORRY.
> Its– its okay, Habit. This is nothing out of the ordinary, really…it happens pretty often when I come around.
> AH…
> Anyways, ummmm…yeah! > Michael is fine. Processing everything, but he's fine. I won't go into more detail though…it's not really my place to talk about his feelings about you, after all. He will come back to say what he needs to when he is ready.
> AND IF HE IS NEVER READY…? IF HE WANTS ME GONE?
> Luckily for you, Mikey doesn't have the only say in that matter. You still have me, Habs – and I want you to be here.
> ................
----
Habit didn't say anything else after that, so thats when I decided to get up and let the creeps out of the bathroom. Now I'm in the kitchen; finishing up this post and waiting for this batch of cookies to bake. I'm just trying to give Hab's brain a moment to catch up with itself, y'know? You know. Whatever. Hopefully the sweets will lighten the mood. I promise I wont eat them all this time, heh.
It also appears that I have missed some interesting bits of insight while out of the house today, so I will check back in later once I am better informed and Habit has gotten a few dozen cookies in his stomach.
[ask] >>
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Okay, not to defend Gotham War or anything, but I think I'm talking myself into liking what I see it's trying to do. Starting with some great tags on this post:
#i get why people are hating on it i really really do. trust me#but TO BE FAIR... zdarsky has been making it overwhelmingly clear that bruce is SERIOUSLY unwell right now#like it's been nonstop Horrors for him for like. over a dozen issues straight. with no rest or time to process. and he doesn't have alfred#who was a HUGE part of his support system not to mention the finances etc etc#iirc there's even a panel that pretty much outright states that this is more of an issue of control than morality#and that includes the choosing sides thing like the batkids seem more concerned w how bruce is going off the fucking rails than#just the moral aspects#anyway (via @clownprince)
#Batman#Bruce Wayne#REAL#REAL REAL REAL#LIKE. Zur En Arrh is a LITERAL Defense Mechanism going Malignant at this point#Not only that but throughout Zdarsky's run there's been allusions to illnesses and Bruce Not Having A Good Time#Not Having a Good Time and Not Having Time At All to take stock of the sheer What The Fuck-ery that's been going on recently#Because it's been a CONSTANT steam of What The Fuck-ery nonstop#And the Worse is yet to come if one considers the future issues synopsis and the ''I am a Gun'' story by Zdarsky#(At most I'm a little bit concerned over how Zdarsky will try to wrap this up‚ but that's a normal concern especially about Comics)#(Especially Batman Comics considering how often Editorial likes to... do things) (via @kaosvrow)
I agree with so much of the criticism of Gotham War, especially that the arguments for or against Selina's plans are absolute garbage by characters who should be making better arguments and that the other characters are being used as bobbleheads instead of actually giving them their canon personalities--and, okay, I will also point out that in the VERY FIRST ISSUE, Selina's plan gets someone killed and so I'm willing to extend some grace that the story isn't trying to push forward that either way is actually right, I honestly don't think it's about that. I think it's a story about Bruce Wayne's mental state, because Zdarsky's been building this up for awhile now, like the issue immediately prior to Knight Terrors? Shows us Bruce's mental state is ALREADY absolute TRASH right then:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c84374eebd919ba2a4f9b2ca46c908a2/fdac7042163782a5-09/s540x810/6b407a7fe0987e2a604b787f523496d3f78ea45f.jpg)
Zur-En-Arrh was already leaking through the seams of his mind, he was already feeling the impending doom of everything he cared about being burned away, that his mind literally couldn't watch his kids being happy and together and getting along without feeling like it was all burning to ash.
And then Knight Terrors happened, which was one more thing digging hard, boney fingers into his trauma, and he handled it pretty well in the moment, but it's such a giant, non-stop pile of stress on a mind that is already damaged to hell and back because of his trauma.
Further, the very first issue of the Gotham War storyline? The very first panel, the one that sets up the stage of what's going to happen, makes a very clear point about how this is about Bruce fracturing:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/89b4155adc4fa151aeeacc3aad526351/fdac7042163782a5-d5/s540x810/43fd44209e2db65d44444198b1d8f7bf6937cfa9.jpg)
And then on the very next page, Zur-En-Arrh is literally stalking at the bars of the cage around Bruce's mind.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6ad1bc41a20b8e4c344f6b7e9a7cdd2e/fdac7042163782a5-05/s540x810/7d148ae1ece58b7d90fd8d2cced9914fec654bb6.jpg)
And then Bruce wakes up and it's immediately more establishing just how worried everyone is about him because so much has been piled on lately:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/45c480ee7907929cd2362a64df55fe84/fdac7042163782a5-2f/s540x810/98e1a9d718bd1ac48f7b35e6865ec4b57793c2cd.jpg)
Bruce hides his missing hand from his family, just like he's trying to hide how scraped thin he is right now, and goes out on patrol.
Where his internal monologue is all about how defensive he feels lately, how he feels like the years are catching up to him, how nothing feels right but this, making it clear that Bruce is hanging onto Batman with a death grip because it's the only thing that feels stable to him right now.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8f7b14f493c39260ff2ec898dc04028a/fdac7042163782a5-95/s640x960/ee5f8fbcbb4e65ce31e940f68946ac4dfdb01405.jpg)
And all of this is in the first TEN PAGES of the first issue, this is our set-up, this is our foundation, this is what we're being given to understand what this story is about. Then Batman #137 happens and it's literally ALL ABOUT BRUCE'S MENTAL SPACE, that Selina's plan is the catalyst, not the driving point behind all of it. Again, I'm in 100% agreement that the Batkids are acting like cardboard cutouts because you will never get me to believe that they didn't notice crime going down or that they wouldn't be pointing out that Gotham's wealthy are just going to start making their security lethal in response or that the Court of Owls won't step in, that this is not a long term solution to giving these people lives beyond crime, or even that a lot of them should be agreeing with Bruce, that they don't get to decide who is an acceptable victim. But the story isn't really about changing up the way comics deal with crime, it's about even the Batkids are framing it in terms of how it's about Bruce. Jason is really the only one who seems onboard with trying out Selina's plan, but even his confrontation with Bruce isn't really about that, it's about all their baggage, their fight immediately becomes about how angry Jason is at the way Bruce has treated him. This fight isn't happening because Jason's a true believer in Selina's plan, it's happening because he's angry at Bruce and Bruce is in a shitty mental place, after all the non-stop horrors AND feeling like he's been betrayed by the kids who he thought understood that people being victims wasn't acceptable, and so he lashes out at Jason.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4b8c793887ed00394cb51d244cee4995/fdac7042163782a5-12/s540x810/6c1fbe066f7797d8f1c9e85e22683cc1d18cc750.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cc8030d6cd06365a553ae8f26b447c7e/fdac7042163782a5-f0/s540x810/3c1adf407a576b5f8df52f89a84b281676eebe53.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ddd4163e0a0b82fb074772e11eba460c/fdac7042163782a5-19/s540x810/b7b2398d006dfd9aa50a2176ab5833e434a372ee.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/caab0dcdc902c264327da7e7f773ef1f/fdac7042163782a5-24/s540x810/b1427e141ba253bdba02d89fb8cd1aedbba74408.jpg)
When they fight, it's not because they're siding against Bruce, it's because he's become unstable and dangerous. The why of it doesn't matter, it's not about that.
(And I'm actually okay with the way that fight happened because I can buy that, for example, Cass might be holding back against him, she's a stronger fighter than he is, but he's being ruthless because of the state he's in, while she might be feeling more cautious.) When they fight, it's not because they're siding against Bruce, it's because he's become unstable and dangerous. The why of it doesn't matter, it's not about that. Even further, when Bruce fights against his kids, he's wrong and biased, especially in the fight with Dick, who he thinks has a sloppy offensive and doesn't know darkness like he does--to which Dick just immediately cracks him in the face because, yeah, Dick Grayson does know darkness and Bruce isn't as untouchable as he's trying to make himself seem (because being Batman is all he has right now).
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8798df6acc69c08a4a962db6eea2d10c/fdac7042163782a5-6c/s540x810/c6e5df4605766bde2b050acd89424dacf543fadc.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/59f13a04db7ab443ae1cb40164026fb1/fdac7042163782a5-73/s540x810/59cab7a111eb53510363c85950500b91ed32c90a.jpg)
I think it's important that it's Dick who defies his expectations here, because this story is building off context of what happened between Selina and Bruce, that they were truly together for awhile, they were about to get married--Selina mentions that it the first issue, it's a major thorn in that conversation when she throws out how she doesn't believe that Gotham needs Batman anymore, it needs her.
She's giving him what he said he always wanted, she's giving him the thing that kept them apart, he should be happy, should they head to the church now? Saying that he won't because he wants to be Batman more than he wants to solve the city's problems.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/671f7e18406f3aa38be3fd23aa314b41/fdac7042163782a5-4e/s540x810/bb46312c050e37a97e933482b9dbe950b00f65f2.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/802d5a8a768459fe69a98382660ab757/fdac7042163782a5-a1/s540x810/3f94090b4fd45676e09da85e064c7762e523aca5.jpg)
The failed wedding between them is important in part because of what Selina's saying here, illustrating that both of them are bringing a lot of baggage to the table but also because of what else happened during that storyline, why the context is so important. Because that storyline dovetailed into one about Bane wanting to take over Gotham and he needed Batman unstable and distracted, which was working after Selina left him at the altar, he was a mess. But you know what was saving him at the time, bringing him back from the ledge? THIS KID:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d36b69b9d0bf951637a617194c9c4c4e/fdac7042163782a5-7e/s540x810/1c1e956cf20112c2aee43e0b084daa9e7abc2fef.jpg)
Dick was the one poking and prodding at Bruce with jokes and warmth and care and it was working. He actually got Bruce to cry in front of him, to release some actual genuine emotion!
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/6705fd31b42fe4e59512a257c8ab887e/fdac7042163782a5-24/s540x810/610d56a641d663ec59a7251d200a51d30628906c.jpg)
Dick makes Bruce more emotionally stable, to the point that Bane had to hire KGBeast to shoot Dick in the head just because he was so good at stabilizing Bruce--this is also why Dick's the one who says he'll go talk Bruce down off his moral ledge in Batman #137.
So, it's Dick that has to be the one to defy his expectations in the fight, has to be the one who breaks through Bruce's offense and knocks him down in what feels like a betrayal even when it isn't, because this isn't a story about who's right and who's wrong, it's a story about Bruce isolating himself because he's mentally fractured to hell and back, because he's not trusting his kids, he's still hurt by Selina leaving him, he's still grieving Alfred's death, he's run ragged physically and emotionally and mentally by a series of exhausting horrors piled on him, he's lost his family's fortune, he's not even living in his own family home anymore. (I focus on Dick here as an illustration of tying this back to previous examples of Bruce crumbling and important context that the storyline is drawing on, but Gotham War isn't really specifically about Bruce and Dick's relationship, but more about Bruce's relationship with all his kids, like Tim and Jason and Damian all have equally important moments. But it's a very direct example of how his children are a huge part of his support system and draw him back from the ledge of being just Batman and back into being Bruce.) That's why the issue ends with Bruce getting the papers telling him that the bank sold Wayne Manor to Vandal Savage, because it's one more thing that's stripping Bruce Wayne away from the character, and leaving him with nothing but Batman and Zur-En-Arrh. Gotham War isn't actually a story about a war for Gotham. It's a story about Bruce Wayne going out of control and everything is written to serve that. The characters' fights are catalyzed by Selina's plans, but they quickly become about Bruce's relationship with the characters. The narrative makes heavy-handed points about Bruce feeling like he's losing his grip, that he's hallucinating and talking to himself, that he is extremely mentally unwell right now. Everything Zdarsky's been writing (like especially the "I Am a Gun" storyline right before Knight Terrors) has been building up to fracturing Bruce Wayne.
#lumi.txt#dc#batfam#bruce wayne#dick grayson#selina kyle#gotham war#long post#feral gremlin length post
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Am I the asshole for not noticing I hurt my friend's feelings?
I (24F) had a somewhat close friend (24F) whom I've known since highschool but only got closer to recently. I've had a friend crush on her forever and apparently she did too. We share a lot of interests and we're both neurodivergent (I'm diagnosed with adhd, and we're almost certain she has autism). We also sort of bonded over a shared trauma -- basically we got two-timed several years ago by a really abusive asshole.
Anyway something happened a couple of months ago and I feel our friendship has gone downhill since then. It was multiple occasions really: what would happen is that I would say something impulsively, and she would misinterpret it and get sensitive about it, we talk it out, I apologize, and we move on. But one time it was a bit too much that i burst into tears while texting her because I felt I really hurt her and I felt that all my friendships will go downhill because whenever I get comfortable with someone I just completely lose my filter and end up hurting them. What happened that day was that we were hanging out and a guy apparently told her something sexist but I didn't hear him. She came to me to complain and I sort of brushed it off because from the way she said it happened it just seemed he was vaguely pointing out something but I later understood that I was just wrong. Then her dress had a tiny hole which I pointed out to her in front of my boyfriend rather impulsively and she got really upset about that. Later on I was telling her about a book I'd read that had great autism representation that didn't have the character just be -- and here I did the dinosaur arms thing (no offense whatsoever to people who do that; I know full well it's a common thing, I was just saying the character had more to him than just that). The problem is that she didn't hear the part where I was talking about a book character because we were changing tables in a crowded cafe and I was just talking non-stop because that's what I do and she thought I just did the dinosaur arms out of nowhere and got offended but didn't say so except over text later and just looked unwell for the rest of the next half hour before she suddenly excused herself and left. That day she texted me about all of these things and we talked it out and I pretended that I was not literally having a meltdown all while apologizing (but not before I tried to plead my case a bit). This all happened on the same day, but before that there were other occasions too. One time she would be talking about something, then I change the subject, then she'd say I know you didn't mean to but I wanted you to give a reply to what I just said. Another time we had a particularly bad exam which I did okay on, but she was telling about how she botched it. I couldn't tell from her face how serious it was and I gave her what i thought was a sympathetic smile (which she later told me was a weird smile) because I really didn't know what to say and then turned away to look for my boyfriend to check on him as well. She told me that day that she felt that I brushed her off when she was having a difficult time and didn't console her enough.
It's just multiple things that made me feel that I need to be more on guard around her for her sake. She moved to another city recently and even before that we were texting less and less. I even asked her if she was upset about the cafe day and she said no since I apologized and we talked it out, but I could feel something in our relationship changed. It just felt like such a shame because I felt a great connection between us and I have massive difficulties when it comes to making friends. She was sort of my last friend that I felt close to aside from my boyfriend, and now I can't help thinking that the problem has always been me.
Sorry if the post was too long and sorry for the sob story lol
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