#because you didn't care about it
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Books of 2024: KILLING FLOOR by Lee Child.
This isn't a genre I typically read; HOWEVER!: my dream agent was on an episode of the Writing Excuses podcast about beginnings, and they said this one is Very Good, so I borrowed my dad's paperback copy to give it a whirl.
I'm low-key hoping this will help me sort out some Genre Issues™ I suspect I'm having with a writing project, too, which is a nice added bonus! Excited to see how this goes.
#books#books of 2024#killing floor#lee child#jack reacher#i think i used to read more stuff Like This in high school??#because it's my dad's big genre and he'd let me borrow books lmao#but i think i drifted away from it because i found out there was other weirder shit going on in different genre corners#and i love weird funny fucked up shit#no shade on the thriller genre it's just not something i've read much of lately!#this will be Good For Me haha#and yeah okay dongwon and MRK talking about it made me more likely to pick it up than my dad at this stage of my life#but he still had a copy so now i have a copy (borrowed) :)#don't get me started on the 'does this mean we can reopen book borrowing' convo he wants to have tho#like no sir you wrecked my paperback LOCKE LAMORA and i'm still salty about it#because you didn't care about it#and you think storing books in our dank-ass basement is taking care of them and it's NOT#we have different standards of care and you don't meet mine#and you eat in bed all the time and i don't want your greasy ass hands on my books >:(#so i don't FEEL like it's hypocrisy not to want to share#but did i look at HPB and B&N for copies of this because of that?? yes yes i did.#i did not find a used copy i was willing to pay $4 for#and i sure as hell wasn't gonna pay $10 for it new so.....#borrowed here#library was my next stop but. he found it.#ANYWAY#i'm gonna log off and go read past the first page i think#(oh sidenote the Genre Issues are:#aw#lucius
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no way she's alive ?? yea those mental health breaks because social media makes people suck are wild huh
#star wars#clone wars#star wars fanart#ahsoka tano#captain rex#anyway i bring you this a) because i'm going back to my tcw roots of late and b) because i miss them terribly#as you can see because i can't handle reality i put her in the novel design#cause wdym they split up after order 66 haha what no that didn't happen you're crazy#read it however you want idc ^^)b any interpretation of their dynamic is the best one i think#yea anyway in this amount of time i've gotten a lot better at anatomy and i don't really care about social media anymore#but i have like nowhere to put my art now so *shrug*#star wars the clone wars#artists on tumblr#i've wanted to do one of those post-type drawings and i am .-+ too lazy +-. to color it sooo#signature got cropped sigh. whatever#if you see a mistake no you don't. you know the drill#also i finally watched bad batch season 3 around christmastime and hewiutgeh.#singlehandedly took the show from a 4 to a 10 for me so thx dave filoni we love u as always >>>#lowk kinda missed it here *gazes fondly at the bot spam and screaming and cursing in my feed*#btw i have never used instagram in my life so if this is formatted wrong it's your fault. bye#someone tell me whether or not i should tag this as rxsk because i am very much debating#does tumblr even like them anymore ?? i know ao3 does they're still going crazy over there (>1k works God bless)#“bro's first post back and she's yapping her head off” cmon you know me by now anyway can we talk about season 7 ahsoka#i find no fault in her. she is perfect. she is the greatest version of any star wars character ever at all#no i will not be thinking about whether or not anyone told her about fives. no i will not be thinking about whether or not anyone told echo#ok that's enough bye i'll wait for this to get four notes at most and three of them being comments screaming at me#one more thing uhh suspend your disbelief since anakin liked the post. rots didn't happen and everything is fine !!#my art
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Basically, my philosophy around disability fakers is: I would rather a thousand people fake a disability than have one disabled person suffer without care, aids, compassion, or any help.
#disability#disability advocacy#and there's a difference not many people seem to recognize between faking and realizing you don't have [x] problem...#...such as realizing you don't have [x] disorder because it is instead [y] disorder...#...or you haven't completely understood your care needs/your symptoms/what helps you...#...and some people see ANY change in your understanding of your disability as proof of maliciously faking...#...when i suppose in my personal experience people don't *maliciously* fake disability...#...i'm not saying it could never happen but that i don't think it's the *only* thing motivating people called fakers#i just think (like most everything) this is complex and nuanced because it's a *human* experience#like for me personally i /know/ i still have a lot to learn about my disabilities...#...like... i realized recently that my hands shouldn't be in AGONY when warm water is ran over them when it's SLIGHTLY cold inside or out...#...and i realized that i likely have a Noticable limb difference that needs checking out. does this sound like i'm faking...#...or that maybe i just didn't really explore my own needs and body because of a variety of factors?#i can assure you it is because i haven't really thought before about how i deserved to understand how to best help myself
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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.
We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.
Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.
He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?
I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?
#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim#time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its#slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis#he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing#hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an#thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit#in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t#talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap#not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire#idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing
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12 Months of 12 - September
#Bit late this month because I was Quite Unwell#I was going to skip September but I thought no. I've come this far#and now I'm glad I didn't because I think this is my strongest month of 12 Months of 12 so far#doctor who fanart#twelfth doctor#clara oswald#whouffaldi#doctor who series 9#twelveclara#dont want to talk about the light source#I thought this up while listening to Bahama Mama by Alphonso Johnson#I usually think of them when I listen to it#also the Gallifreyan on the monitor is a scaled down version of my banner#it says 'do you think I care for you so little betraying me would make a difference'#at least it does if I did it right#i slaved away for hours on this now tell me you like it#12 months of 12
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Jesus man, relax.
#this was in response to me saying “lunar new year” on the rarity art#personal#delete later#what in insane nonproblem to get this angry about#i asked my parents (taiwanese immigrants) about this and they said we use either but prefer lunar new year#because it's inclusive to koreans and vietnamese people who celebrate on the same day#lunar new year is an umbrella term same as “happy holidays.” this person is basically getting mad i said happy holidays instead of#merry christmas.#my family and i identify more as taiwanese than chinese so. we're not gonna say chinese new year much anyways#i sent this to my mom btw and she replied with basically “die mad i guess.” love you ma#this literally doesn't matter anyways i could have said “chinese new year” to caption that post and it wouldn't have mattered#the only reason i didn't is because i plan on drawing another art including carol (coco pommel) who's korean and celebrates the same day#like. most people in china/taiwan don't care they just say “happy new year” cuz it's the fuckin new year. someone saying lunar new year is#not erasure it's not flattening asian identities into a monolith. it's just an umbrella term.#anyways happy lunar new year happy chinese new year happy tet happy spring festival happy seollal#like i cannot stress enough to you guys that these holidays are on the exact same day and celebrate basically the same exact thing.#this is not an issue.
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Prosecutors' honest reactions.
#Made this months ago and just remembered it.#don't argue with me about Godot he is way too misogynistic to admit he might like dick too#Payne is probably straight but he can't make an argument to save his life#and regardless of what you think Manfred's is he'd be more upset by the bad spelling and grammar than anything else#and i didn't use any prosecutors after game four because A) i wanted to use 2d sprites#and B) I don't really care for the mainline games after AA:AJ#phoenix wright#winston payne#godot#franziska von karma#klavier gavin#manfred von karma#miles edgeworth#wrightworth#narumitsu#ace attorney#ur gay meme
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First impressions!!
A quick doodle idea I had where Axel brings Aim to his parents to properly introduce him. Axel gets called out-
Axel belongs to me.
Aim belongs to @zu-is-here
#undertale au#utmv#sanscest#oc#doodle#what if#errorink ship child#axel#ink sans#error sans#aim!sans#aimel#post dark cream#errorink#i imagine Axel being surprised and embarrased by Error being hostile and protective because he usually never cared about his love life#unlike his sisters lol#“i thought you didnt care!”#“i didn't care because you didnt have KIDS with any before.”#also Ink is that embarrassing parent that loves to make Axel feel flustered because they like to accidentally reveal secrets or do stuff#like excitedly show off Axels baby pictures
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Choi Han, for a test from a god, is sent to an unknown land with "Cale."
Choi Han, upon arrival, realizes something is strange about this Cale. He's got a similar appearance to his own Cale but the eyes are sharper, with a witty bite to his tongue and a quick sneer always at the ready.
He's clearly confused and distressed about being in a strange place with a strange person but he does his best to not let it show. His hand reaches for a bottle of alcohol that isn't there.
Choi Han thinks that this Cale isn't like his Cale at all.
Choi Han has a hunch that this Cale is the one from before Kim Rok Soo's possession. It makes sense. So he isn't his Cale.
However, though Choi Han wants to become cold to this stranger version of Cale, when he looks into those red-brown eyes and sees fear, he draws back. It's an instinctual feeling that he gets, right as Cale is spitting more vile words to cover up the trembling in his hands, that he doesn't want to see even a terrible Cale be afraid of him.
This doesn't stop them from arguing. Through towns, forests, deserts, they both learn on an intimate level that they would never, ever get along. Cale is too loud, too threatening, and Choi Han can't resist from debating with this strange Cale about morals, of all things. They argue constantly.
Though they argue, Choi Han can't help himself from sometimes mistaking this Cale for his own. He tells himself it's because they look alike.
They're both in the midst of an argument when a noble-like individual approaches them with cloying words, which seek to lure them inside of the noble's home. Choi Han is suspicious, but before he has the chance to decline, Cale steps in front of Choi Han and demands to speak to the noble who wants to see them.
The noble-like individual turns out to be the servant of a more powerful man, something that Cale saw through immediately.
Choi Han is stunned.
How did this, this trashy Cale with no moral upstanding, clock the intentions of a person so quickly and accurately?
He asks him directly. Cale shrugs. Choi Han believes he's mistaken when Cale's eyes flicker with calculating intent. They don't discuss it further.
Little moments like these keep occurring. Cale does something impressive, Choi Han inquires, and Cale downplays it with a sneer or an insult and refuses to speak about it again. It's weird and strange but it's familiar. Extremely so. Not the insulting, and the sneer is too odd to be his own Cale's face, but it's familiar in the sense that they both underestimate themselves. They both refuse to acknowledge what lies under the surface of their visage.
This Cale is a strange individual. He swears and laughs and grins, he's too calm about their situation, and it's difficult to get through to him when he makes up his mind about something. But the strangest thing is that all of these things remind Choi Han of his Cale.
Finally, it all comes down to a final battle. One more fight and both himself and this Cale can go back to where they belong. Choi Han is ready.
Cale receives a power from a book before the battle and it's unlike anything Choi Han has ever seen. But the coughing up of blood makes him have Cale swear to never use it. Cale swears.
Choi Han makes Cale promise to stay on the sideline and not approach. Cale easily agrees.
They get to the last stage, the last time they'll see each other again, and the villain of this world is too powerful. It's as if he weren't meant for them to fight. It's as if he were made so that they struggle.
Choi Han swings his blade to block a blow that he knows he can't block, knows might end him, and he thinks about how he can't possibly die right now and leave this Cale behind... but he's too weak.
He wonders what his Cale would do in this moment, when everything seems hopeless and nothing is working.
Cale steps in front of him and uses his power to its fullest extent.
White light is shining everywhere, blinding Choi Han who keeps his burning eyes open, desperately keeps his eyes on the Cale that's bleeding from his mouth and his nose and his eyes and his skin is starting to crack, crack like he is about to turn into dust and disappear.
Cale turns to look at Choi Han.
"Ah. I was worried it wouldn't be enough to take out the villain." His eyes stained with blood curl up in a smile. A ball of dread sits in Choi Han's stomach. "I'm glad. I'm really, really..." eyes drifting closed, his body begins to shatter further and further. "Happy for you, Choi Han."
This is why they felt familiar.
It's with a cry of grief and anger, anger at himself, that Choi Han reaches out to hold Cale, hold onto even a piece of him.
Cale's eye, the only one left as he is disintegrating, widens.
Choi Han grasps a fragment that's about to vanish from Cale's chest, somewhere next to his heart, and this piece doesn't break, doesn't disappear from Choi Han's hand. It stays solid and firm and real-
And it's all that Choi Han is left with when the gods test ends.
Choi Han wakes up, surrounded by his family, with a red, glass marble in his hand. He holds it to his chest. It hurts.
It hurts.
#Choi Han#original cale henituse#og cale henituse#tcf#lcf#totcf#lotcf#lout of the counts family#trash of the count’s family spoilers#fanfiction#fic writing#not a reblog#I thought about Choi Han and og!Cale#they would never get along. Cale would be too inviting of the anger and frustration of Choi Han and he'd embrace it with a bruised face just#like he did that day they would've first met#but og!Cale and krs!Cale are actually pretty similar in a lot of ways. and I bet they're similar in this kind of way too#how could Cale the trash live and let Choi Han the good die after all? that's not how the story goes#so he uses the book to defeat the villain and let Choi Han live. but even he knows that he's going to die#he doesn't think that Choi Han cares about him#his vile words and spitting on the face of those who dare to look at him is not something that people can love or accept. its why he does it#because he knew it would help Basen. if he made himself unlikeable. unloveable. he had to be trash to protect him and he has to be trash#to protect that#but Choi Han looks at him. who is disappearing. and he reaches out to save him#and isn't Cale's surprise the most heartbreaking thing? he can't be loved. not by someone he just met. but Choi Han looked at him#and he didn't want to let him disappear. like there was something about him worth keeping#that's why his heart shard remains intact. because that's his heart. which wants to be kept. which doesn't want to disappear.#anyway what's up guys been a while#how's the angst?#have you ever truly thought about og Cale and how he searched for ways to become unloveable and then did his best to become it?#and he believed it was true. did he even love himself? I like to think he learned to.
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Prompt 81
Danny blinked at the small children Ellie was holding the hand of, looking quite proud of herself. The small children- between ten and twelve so somewhere similar to Ellie’s age- who both practically stank of magic and Gods.
He took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose even as Dan cackled while opening the door more to let them inside. “Alright, what’s your name, kids?”
“B-billy…um, Billy Batson...” “‘m Percy! Percy Jackson.”
“Nice to meet you two- any idea where in your family you have a god or two, because one of you definitely smells like Zeus and I’m pretty sure Poseidon and I am not dealing with either of my half-brothers.”
#prompts#dcxdp#dpxpj#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#billy batson#Danny was adopted by Clockwork who is the origin behind Kronos#Oh they're both orphans? No one to take care of them?#Goddamnit Clockwork you made sure Ellie found them didn't you#Liminals are hidden from monsters thanks to feeling like them & the dead#CW: If they won't take care of their kids then I'll give the lil demigods to my favorite son :)#The JL finding out Billy is a child: You need a guardian- how could we let this happen#Billy: Actually my older sister has looked 12 for the last 100 years and my younger brother looks 20 so that's very human-ist of you#Percy peering out at some camp people who are trying to see if he's home: MA There's some weird ass cats outside!#Percy: Am I allowed to throw the pool at them 'cause they aren't taking no for an answer#Danny teaching the kids how to use powers: Alright and now we're going to your other dad and moms to learn magic#Danny: And how to shoot a gun in Val's case because I will forget gun safety#Everlasting Quartet#Phantastic Four#“Hey Marvel how do you know that info about Dr Fate he looks so pissed??”#“Oh one of my parents know him and they don't get along so now we always take the chance to call him a lil Bitch but politely”#Percy: Billy if you can summon lightning and I can control water can we combine them#Billy: One way to find out- hey Daaaaan#Camp people trying to find Percy: Wtf wtf wtf#The pantheon: WHAT DO YOU MEAN KRONOS HAD ANOTHER CHILD?! WHERE?! HOW!?#Clockwork: Look at my Favorite Child who doesn't Fuck with the Timeline or are Raging Hypocrites & takes care of his kids#Clockwork curled up with Danny & new grandchildren in his chest like a mother crocodile: Everything is as it should be :)#Marvel: Look at my lil brother isn't he adorable he's a year younger than me but takes more after our other mom#Percy: Hi Mr Aquaman I can control water & talk to fish and was wondering if you have any tips#“Marvel we're going to die-” “No we're not lemme call my big brother- if he can destroy the timeline he can fix it” “If he What”
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2x02 // 3x01 // 3x03 // 3x13 // 4x12
Team huddle!
#so funny that there are no team huddles in s1 because they didn't plan back then#And then for most of s4 MK is in denial that there should be a plan beyond ''get my friends!''#lmk#lego monkie kid#plan man#one day I'll make my post of every time they mention the word ''plan''#that'll be a long one#''How could you lead us into this fight without a real plan?'' ''We've basically winged it without a real plan!''#yeah#4x12 did so much for me personally#Me pre s4: oh yeah it looks like MK took on the role of planning especially after Wukong failed to do so#And even further back MK focused on developing this skill after 1x10 when he was worried about winging it with his friends on the line#''What's the plan monkie man?'' ''I don't know. Wing it?'' ''Yeah! Sounds great!'' ''No! I didn't mean you guys too!''#s4 special: Hold my beer#Me: REALLY????? YOU'RE BRINGING THIS TO THE FOREFRONT FOR MK???#no one else may care but lmk writers just know. I do#I care
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C1E60 || C3E88
#critical role#criticalroleedit#vex'ahlia#imogen temult#laura bailey#gifs#*#*cr#*parallel#cr1#cr3#vex'ahlia cr#syldor vessar#liliana temult#r: vex x imogen#angst tag#*meta#cr meta#47m c1e60#3h12m c3e88#laura bailey said it's all about the blood of you mixed into the blood of me whether i like it or not and what does that mean#because it certainly doesn't seem to mean that you love me.#and how can i love you when you were supposed to raise me and protect me and care for me and you didn't#how can i love you when you were supposed to teach me what love is and instead you only taught me hate and loneliness#and why is there a part of me that still desperately hopes that you do love me? that you could bring yourself to love me?#and then the part that makes me go even more batshit crazy: THEY HAVE /MET/ EACH OTHER. THESE TWO WOMEN HAVE M E T#*SCREAMS FOR SEVEN THOUSAND HOURS STRAIGHT*
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My Viva gijinka design ✨🌟🌠 isn't she fantamazing!
#dreamworks trolls#trolls#my art#trolls viva#viva#trolls human design#trolls gijinka#since tbt references to 90s-2000s music and band aesthetic#i headcanon tat Viva was a total y2k fashionista girly#and when she and the rest that got separated and isolated themselves#stayed with te fashion sense for 2 decades so i wanted to incorporate that in her human design#which i think thats why her fashion coices in te fun fair surprise is rather questionable to other#but se doesn't care#as long what she wears makes her hapy who cares#my resononing for the cargo pants#we see that Viva is very much paranoid and scared of going outside which reminded me of Agoraphobia#and for for good reason#so she adopted millitary strategies to ensure the putt putt course was heavely protected from any threats of bergen adfrom the outside wor#funfact! at first i kinda felt weird about Viva#i didn't hate her relax#just strange#then i realized because she was hoenstly roobed of her childhood and safety and ad to grow up fast wile also trying not to beack down think#they wouldn't abandon them right? no troll left behind RIGHT?!#anyways Viva is such an itresting character and im lucky that other people too find her fascinating to draw and write about her cuz you kno#anywho got to finish this cause is starting to drag on and i going back to college soon so yeah#trolls band together
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the affection radiating from hans is palpable here isn't it
#kingdom come deliverance#kcd2#hans capon#henry of skalitz#and yeah i know this is a general cutscene that plays even if you didn't romance hans#but you know. contextualized it works. so i'm going to say this anyway#and also. romantic or not. the actor did such a beautiful job at conveying tone and expressions with hans#you ever stop and think that hans here didn't know if henry was going to come back alive#and because of the setting they're in hans couldn't run and hug or kiss him or anything#so the result is this gaze filled with so much love and longing#sighs#romance or not these two care so much about each other#and it radiates from the screen#kcd spoilers
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Incorrect, the fact that Biden has dropped out and a candidate with history of supporting medicare for all and being more receptive to a ceasefire in the I/P conflict has made me go from "I cannot morally support the Democratic nominee" to "I am voting for the Democratic nominee despite the fact she isn't perfect in every respect." I'm really happy this played out. The Dems for the most part abandoned the old Obama platform and it feels like its possible an actual progressive agenda could come to pass in my lifetime.
Kamala 2024!
If you weren't going to vote Democratic in this election before Biden dropped out you're a dorkass loser who does not care about any of the issues you're yammering about here and also a fundamentally bad person, and I hope you get run over by a bus.
But you got one thing right in all of this gibberish, Kamala 2024.
#personal#answered#anonymous#i mean let's be clear here no president is gonna attempt to be progressive ever again within my lifetime#because joe biden tried to do like 25% of that and got ZERO fucking credit#he did so much on healthcare on reform on loans on so many social issues and for all his litany of failings on i/p#he has been distinctly harsher on netanyahu than a good chunk of dems and certainly the entire republican party#for the first time since i was four we are not involved in any wars as americans and that is thanks to joe biden#but the thing is that he gets no credit for any of it!#him pulling out of afghanistan caused his approvals to tank in a way that never recovered#and leftists gave him FUCK ALL for it#they gave him nothing they just continued whining that even tho he cancelled a bajillion in student loans#he didn't actually cancel a QUADRILLION dollars so both parties are the same and voting is the most arduous task known to man#no democrat who is running is going to forget that catering to leftist/progressive policies gets them zero leeway with those supporters#that it not only tanks numbers but you still get constant haranguing about it anyway#so they're not gonna do it#we are gonna get fuckall for at least a good fifty years#and anything we get will be utterly in SPITE of people like you anon it will happen in spite of everything you've done#mostly because of people like me and mine who understand that voting is the bare minimum#and that for the democratic process to work the way you want it to you need to participate and not pitch a fucking fit#like a four year old who was told they can't go to disney this weekend#like i know you ratfuckers are happy this played out because this is all a game to you and you don't actually care#but that's why i've got zero faith in you people and why i'm glad it's my kind of folks#actual die hard democrats who have always been hardliners for supporting democrats in every possible election#who are picking up the slack and donating to harris and supporting her agenda#which is the exact same as biden's because she's his vice president and they share they same platform#because that's what they were both running on! twice!#anyway fuck you please feel free to find a necktie and test how tall your doorframe is
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woke up from a dead sleep last night realizing I could make soroku flavored pitch pearl and no one could stop me
edit: you know what? I'm feral and I won't apologize. more under the cut bc this is my house
I slammed this out all at once so I apologize for the quality but I'm having EMOTIONS
so imagine. bc of the way Danny was quickly resuscitated, his ghost only barely started forming. With the excess blast of ectoplasm from the portal being created, that little whisp was given form even after Danny's soul returned to his body.
except this ghost (Phantom) slowly comes into consciousness while trapped in Danny's body. they're separate entities sharing one body, but Phantom doesn't really have a sense of self right away. he pieces together vague fragments of Danny's memory to get a basic understanding of the world, and is mostly just observing like a backseat passenger.
Phantom starts reflexively protecting Danny, his powers and instincts bleeding through when his emotions are high. Danny doesn't really transform, and his personality doesn't totally shift that much at first because Phantom’s mind isn't complex yet. but as time goes on, and Danny has tense conversations with ghosts, Phantom realizes that's what he is. he's a ghost, somehow trapped in his old body. and even now, this early on, he already feels separate. he doesn't have all the memories Danny has.
this slowly turns into horror. into rage. sorrow, mourning a life he never got and will never get to have. forever trapped behind the eyes of someone else, never able to interact with the world. Phantom's rage eventually boils over until it allows him short bursts of taking over Danny's body. it starts out small–a stray hand moving without his consent, knees locking up, ghost abilities going awry. Danny can start feeling emotions that don't belong to him. get vague impressions, almost hears a voice inside him.
and eventually, Phantom is able to fully take over. this is when Danny “transforms". at first, Danny blacks out because his consciousness isn't used to being shoved into the back seat. but eventually, he's awake for these “episodes", trapped in the back of his mind while Phantom controls his body. this only happens when ghost stuff is happening, when Phantom feels threatened enough. he's not protecting Danny, he's protecting himself. Phantom knows instinctively that if Danny dies, he dies too. he's not a normal ghost, he wouldn't be freed. he'd simply disappear.
at one point after a fight, Phantom can feel Danny struggling to take back control. and he talks to Danny for the first time, acknowledges he's there. asks how it's fair that Danny is the one that gets to exist. but Phantom is tired and weak, he slips back into the passenger seat.
over the next few days, he's able to start talking to Danny even while he's not driving. though he's not chatty, it's only when necessary. and Danny knows, can feel it across the link between them–Phantom hates him. the ghost he created is desperate to find a way to take over completely. and as time goes on, Danny realizes with horror that it might actually be possible for Phantom to do that. he grows stronger every day, can stay transformed longer, controls Danny's body with much more ease.
it's only through a chance meeting with Frostbite that Danny and Phantom fully learn what happened to them. Danny feels sympathetic towards Phantom now. this isn't a malevolent ghost, it's a person who was never given the chance to live. who's trapped. who has to watch someone else live a life they're just as deserving of.
and Phantom feels that emotion from Danny. is so shocked by it, he doesn't know how to handle it at first. it takes him a while to contemplate, to talk to other ghosts like Frostbite. until one day, Phantom realizes… he feels sympathy for Danny, too.
neither of them asked for this. both of them deserve to live. Danny didn't do anything wrong. they're both villains to each other's story. and if anything… doesn't Phantom owe his life to Danny in the first place?
Phantom takes over less often. Danny doesn't feel hatred from him anymore. anger, yes–but not aimed at him. in fact, Phantom starts controlling their body in little ways in order to protect Danny from things that aren't even dangerous. just to avoid pain that would only affect the human tethered to him.
it isn't long before they're separated, either thanks to another ghost or Danny's parents. they're thrown apart in the middle of a horrific fight, and when Danny sees Phantom's equally shocked expression, he's terrified.
this ghost that hated him for so long–at best, Phantom would leave him defenseless. at worst, surely some part of Phantom still wants to kill him for stealing away his chance for autonomy.
and yet, when fire rains down on them, Phantom risks it all to grab Danny and get them both to safety. they're still both shaken and stunned this is even happening, but Phantom is able to nervously be like shit shit shit okay stay here don't go anywhere or I can't protect you, okay?
after the fight is over and dust settles, Phantom offers Danny his hand. they stare at each other and god if this isn't the weirdest thing. like, uh, okay, what now? they decide to go see Frostbite, who confirms that they're fully separate now. they ask if there's any chance of merging again and Frostbite assures it's impossible.
Phantom asks, even if I overshadowed Danny? or stay real close? yes, it's nothing to worry about. they leave, and back in the quiet of Danny's room, they talk. Phantom isn't sure what to do. now that opportunity is in front of him, he feels paralyzed. Danny does his best to let Phantom know that… they might be separate now, but if he ever wants help or even just a friendly ear, he's here for him.
Phantom is quiet for a while. then says maybe he just needs to rest first. he'll think about it tomorrow. they're both exhausted and injured. Phantom asks quietly… if he could rest in Danny for the night.
Danny's shocked, and–really confused. Phantom blushes and is like I don't know what my haunt is yet, I don't know where to go, but I know… you're kind of my home. now that I know I can leave whenever I want, it's not something bad anymore. I miss feeling your heart next to my core, just a little bit.
and Danny is just as surprised when Phantom overshadows him, then quietly nestles into the passenger seat again. he didn't realize how he got used to feeling Phantom with him. it's a feedback loop of contentedness, and Danny sleeps easily. (they also find out while sharing a body, Danny gets to reap the benefits of Phantom's supernatural healing)
anyway that's all I got for now thank u for coming to my ted talk
#I'll be honest. it has interested me. I've read fics. I'm just more interested in other stuff for dp#but the prospect of pitch pearl 'enemies to friends also maybe they kiss about it' has me sweating nervously#the struggle and angst of defining yourself against your progenitor. the defiant sorrowful anger funneled into misplaced hatred#only to slowly realize your progenitor is a sweet person who didn't condemn you. they even fight for you to have your own agency#so once you finally have your own body you'll do anything to protect that person you've come to truly care about#and because you shared a body for so long. because you had the same origin. you know them as well as you know yourself#you're not incomplete but you still hold half of each other#HAHA WOW anyway I'm in danger :)#don't. don't look at me#should i even tag this. yeah okay#Danny Phantom#pitch pearl
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