#because the parallels are too damn good y'all
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Wait. Hold on. So when Ellie said she had killed before, was she.... was she referring to Riley? Like fuck, she had that look on her face when Joel tried asking more about it, like she gave him the look/attitude he usually gives her whenever Tess is brought up, yknow?
Also we never really saw what went down at the mall after both Ellie and Riley decided to "lose their minds together", like we obviously know the outcome: Ellie survived because she's somehow immune and Riley... Riley most likely turned. But now, like after Ellie said the random dude wasn't her first kill, my mind goes straight to the mall and the aftermath of that one fateful night.
We know we're gonna get that flashback, it was briefly shown in the trailers. Maybe it'll even weave itself with the narrative of the game (Ellie taking care of injured Joel at the abandoned, snowy mall), but fuck me the fuck up, if we get the missing scene between what happened to Riley and how Ellie ended up being tied to a pipe at the fireflies place..... I'll lose my shit.
Because that was the catalyst for Ellie, like it's her own Tess moment. Joel went on that journey for Tess because she believed Ellie is the answer to how to stop the fungus, she's the cure they've been dreaming of in secret for 20 years. That's what Tess died for and she made sure Joel will take that responsibility for her sake.
And that's exactly what Riley is for Ellie, her death had a bigger meaning, a revelation of sorts. Every person that died around her became a part of that surviour's guilt, a reason why she needs to get to the fireflies' hospital and sacrifice herself for a cure. Riley was the first name on that list, arguably the most important name there, because it was her that made it possible. She took Ellie to the mall, she got the power on, she played around with her, put on the loud music that attracted the infected and... it was her that suggested they'll be poetic and wait it out. Her presence made it all possible! Like I'm not blaming Riley for what happened at the mall, but she was the one who initiated the plot in the game. But again, it's bigger than that. She could have killed Ellie, they both could have ended their lives right there and then. Maybe Riley dragged Ellie's ass to the mall and it's her fault they both got bitten, but y'all she also saved Ellie's life! She's the reason Ellie got to live and realize she's different, that she's immune.
Now imagine all of that guilt that was already presented to us in the game and add the possibility Ellie had to grab Riley's gun and shoot her herself after she turned.
"Back inĀ Boston, back when I was bitten, I wasn't alone. My bestĀ friendĀ was there and she got bit too. We didn't know what to do, so she says, 'let's just wait it out. Y'know, we can be allĀ poeticĀ and just lose our minds together.' I'm still waiting for my turn."
That is the catalyst that started the journey way before Joel even knew what was heading in his way, and if that's the direction the show is going, like letting us actually see Ellie's guilt is as big as Joel's... I'm already strapped in and waiting to launch myself to the sun.
#the last of us#the last of us (show)#ellie williams#joel miller#hm maybe also#joel x ellie#because the parallels are too damn good y'all#text#oof i had a lot to say lol#it was meant to be a short post but my mind kept going and going#i revisited the game and everything is so fresh and painful to me š#anyways yeah when ellie said she killed before i first thought it was a random clicker or soemthing#and then i remembered ellie's first encounter with them (in game canon at least) was the mall#which made me think of riley immediately and... i made the connection :):):)#i connected the dots and now i'm in so much pain lmao#we will get tha mall flashback that's a guarantee based on the trailers#but if we see ellie taking riley's life or even hear the sound of a gunshot... oh boy oh boy!!!#god that show is so good
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ā„ļøReveling in Richonne - TOWL
#35: The Buildup (1.04)
gif cred: @perryabbott
This moment. This moment. This moment. Where to even begin? Let's just start by saying - hottest scene ever. š„ā¤ļøāš„š„ When Richonne get back to that apartment thereās a whole stretch where they donāt do any talking...but yet they still have some very riveting communication šš½...
They seriously tried to send me up into the afterlife with this whole moment, but itās okay, I forgive them and thank them profusely. š
Y'all, I adore the way this pivotal, palpable, and incredible depiction of intimacy plays out. And the mind of Danai to turn both this buildup moment here and the love-making scene into something so deep and layered. Genius. šš½š
Rick and Michonne returning to this level of intimacy with each other for the first time in almost eight years was already going to make it pertinent to the plot and a purposeful development in the story - but for Danai to be of the mindset that she didnāt just want to stop at pertinent but instead communicate something profound and emotionally complex with Richonne's lovemaking moment. She deserves every flower for the thoughtfulness put into this. š
And TOWL in general was Andy and Danai getting to display their talent and chemistry to the max but from this moment on they broke the damn dial with the way they turned the volume all the way up on their talent and chemistry. šš½ š
source: @ririchonne
Genuinely, not even being hyperbolic, what was captured in the following passionate events feels out of this world and so of course when reveling over it I have to be...
This whole buildup moment in the apartment before Richonne heads to the bed is the hottest part for me. š„ The amount of tension and desire that they convey is crazy good. Richonne's hunger for each other is just visceral and it's like you can almost tangibly feel the way they're burning up for each other. ā¤ļøāš„
So Rick and Michonne make it back to the apartment and we know adrenaline rushes really help set the mood for Richonne so the sexual tension in the air is thick immediately.
Theyāre both just breathing hard and then the temp controller chimes in to welcome them home again which I love. š And this time they really are about to come home to each other in a sense.
gif cred: @nat111love
Like Michonne came really close to leaving but now that events have led them right back to each other in this apartment I feel like the thermostat is trying to get Richonne's attention like āhello, yāall are home to each other.ā
Michonne is standing a bit ahead of Rick and looking around...and Rick aināt looking anywhere but at her. Like homeboy is fixated. I feel like even if a dang meteor could be seen plummeting from that big window Rick wouldnāt peel his eyes off Michonne in this moment. š
I think after coming close to losing her several times in the last hour heās a bit more aware of how much he needs to appreciate that sheās here with him.Ā
Michonne lifts up her sleeve a little because I think she can fully sense this hungry man behind her and what's on his mind (and her mind too.šš½)
gif cred: @nat111love
And the temp controller says, āTemperature control malfunctionā and thatās probably because the temperature is already record levels of hot with Richonne's sexual tension permeating the air like this lol. ļæ½ļæ½
Rick slowly approaches her and Michonne slowly turns to him as they get up close and personal. The way Richonne can communicate without words, I feel like a whole lot gets said in their eye contact and kisses during this wordless sequence.Ā
gif cred: @nat111love
Also, I like how this scene parallels when Rick and Michonne were first in front of each other with the PRB earlier in this episode.
During that PRB moment, Rick was looking at Michonne like 'I know what we want to do but we canāt. ' And then now here when they've returned to the apartment heās looking at her like 'I know what we want to do and we must.' They're starving and they canāt resist anymore.
Honestly, whenever Rick is within kissing distance from Michonne he looks like her presence consumes his mind and those inner magnets make it near impossible to not just lean in every time.
Also, I always get reflective of Richonne's overall journey and I just love how Rick and Michonne really went from this to this.
A love story for the ages. š¤©
So Rick looks down, mouth all open, and just again transfixed as he slowly reaches out his hand to touch her. One thing I love about this buildup moment is the slowness of everything. š Like every movement takes its time.
And it makes sense that Rick is moving at a slower pace here because heās trying to see if itās okay to initiate all this after everything they just went through. But while the movement is slow, his heart looks like it's racing rapidly as he becomes pretty much intoxicated by her.
gif cred: @nat111love
...And Michonne canāt resist, yāall. š¤ Like she knows sheās technically supposed to still be mad at Rick after the awful things heās said but it quickly becomes clear that she misses him even more than sheās mad at him.Ā š„²
gif cred: @nat111love
And she misses all of him, including the parts she has yet to reunite withā¦but thatās soon about to change.
gif cred: @nat111love
Rick slowly puts his hand on her arm and she doesnāt pull away. And then Rick looks in her eyes like he hasnāt had a good glass of water in 1000 years and Michonne is the only woman that can quench him. Like the yearning in his look was really something.
gif cred: @nat111love
And then, yāall I thought it was laundry day the way our girl Michonne proceeds to fold. š And of course, she folds. That's her baby and the love of her life and she hasnāt been able to be with him like this in years so...
Before Rick leans in for the first kiss, heās already in the process of winning her over cuz she leans in a little first basically letting him know she does want this. It was giving magnets when she did that. š§²šš½Ā
And her super subtle lean-in is all Rick needs to finally fully lean in and kiss her and I love Richonneās slow single kisses. š So far in TOWL theyāve been understandably ravenously making out and so this moment stands out for how much they let each kiss breathe a little. Itās so good.
gif cred: @nat111love
But also yāall, when I first watched this, knowing this is def building up to their first TOWL sex scene, I was sounding a lot like Nat. Cuz I was looking at Michonne like, āSis...
I just wanted to be sure Michonne was going to be making love with her Rick and not the Sergeant Major who's been saying hurtful things and still hasn't asked anything about RJ.
Plus, I had a feeling Rick still had a little audacity left in his system and wasnāt yet going to agree to go home with her. (And that ended up being correct š)ā¦But look, itās been a long time and so Michonne was like weāll address all that later.Ā š
gif cred: @kimwexlersponytail
So Rick kisses her once and then leans to the other side as Michonne puts her hand on his face, letting Rick know she doesn't want him to stop. They kiss a second time with a little more lingering on that kiss as things slowly but surely ramp up.
When they pull away Michonne looks at him like she maybe has 1% left in her that remembers sheās still supposed to be mad. The other 99% of her just longs for him.
gif cred: @msanonships
And then that 1% disappears into thin air during this next kiss and itās my favorite part. š
Cuz Rick proves that it may have been some years but he still knows his wife and knows what gets her going because, while they donāt fully show it, you can tell that he definitely seems to have reached down to her derriĆØre and thatāll do it for her, honey. š
gif cred: @fishalthor
Cuz when he does that and pulls her in closer to him, he has Michonne inhaling hard and fully leaning into that third hungry kiss. At that moment I was like...annnnd he got her. He got her and she aināt mad no more. It worked like he knew it would. š
Itās also probably his first time even really being able to touch her like that since again those layers of clothing in previous eps were sort of a barrier.
There seems to be a consistent thing set up that her grabbing his hair gets him activated and as her husband, he definitely knows that grabbing her backside gets her activated...and him too lol. I think Michonneās presence in general just gets Rick activated. Every part of her is a feast to him. šš½
gif cred: @msanonships
And that last kiss just felt like they were about as ready to be intimate as they've ever been. After all that pulling each other closer in the previous kisses of this miniseries, this was the moment of them wanting to be as physically connected as possible and now they finally had the space to be.
Interestingly, they film a lot of this kissing moment where you mostly see Michonneās response to Rick. I think thatās because sheās the one having to make the decision right now on whether sheāll let him in after everything he's said and done. And um I think her decision is clear.
gif cred: @msanonships
It's great how Rick is the one person who can make Michonne let go and get fully lost in the moment no matter what else is going on. And you know she has that same effect on Rick too. šš½
I love how locked in they both get with that third kiss and how they turn things up a notch with it.
Those three kisses were communication. And, on top of them both communicating 'I need you and want you bad' in each kiss, the way I interpret the wordless conversation is that the first kiss was like Rick expressing, āIām glad youāre okay and that youāre backā after the whole Michonne walking out and then later getting trapped by that chandelier stuff.
gif cred: @nat111love
Then that second kiss felt like Rick expressing, "I'm sorry" and Michonne receives that unspoken apology even tho when she looks at him there's a part of her that feels like there's still a lot for them to address and resolve.
gif cred: @lousolversons
And then y'all, to me Rick's little reach down with the third kiss was him saying, āCan I make it up to you?ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½ And honey, Michonne's response said she'll definitely let him.
gif cred: @lousolversons
So then they really want to turn it up a notch when Rick proceeds to pick Michonne up. And clearly heās done this before because Michonne is ready for it, and I love the way they just seamlessly transition into this. š
One thing I never questioned is if Rick would feel anxious about loving on Michonne with one hand. I knew that man would be like as long as Iām breathing thatās all I need to find a way.
gif cred: @nat111love
So Rick picks her up with ease and heās basically just like 'alright youāre coming with me' and Michonne is like yes I am lol. And I also adore how even once he picks her up they immediately go right back to passionately kissing. The way these two fervidly desire each other is always š©š½āš³š.
And I, of course, have to reflect on the overall journey once more because I just love that we went from Rick picking Michonne up on Day One of meeting each other as strangers, to now Rick picking Michonne up as husband and wife ready and eager to express their love in a way they haven't been able to in a long time.
gif cred: thewalkingdeadgifs/@msanonships
Seeing Rick and Michonne just get to operate fully in their husband and wife energy here was great to see. šš½ They crave each other deeply and this scene captured that perfectly. ā¤ļøāš„
The way their electrifying kisses slowly ramped up, it was clear that now that Rick and Michonne finally had the chance to reconnect in a way that they hadn't been able to with each other, nor allowed themselves to with anyone else, for several years, there was no way they were gonna just stop at these kisses here.
gif cred: @lousolversons
So yāall, this scene alone was already so hot it could break a temperature controller...but then the steamy sensual vibes continue. And as Richonne is finally intimate for the first time in years, the deep, passionate, and emotional moment is, in every way, a roller coaster ride. š¢ ššš½
#richonne#towl#reveling in richonne#1.04#RIR (35)#the ones who live#twd towl#michonne grimes#rick grimes#rick x michonne#twol#michonne#rick and michonne#twd: the ones who live#twd#richonnefandom
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In Another Universe
#4. F.R.I.E.N.D.S
Synopsis ā When you are just another iteration of Park Jiminās girlfriend in a different universe.
Park Jimin Ć Reader
Genre ā parallel universe (duh)/ kind of fantasy/ strangers to ??/ SMUT/ maybe romance/ angst/ fluff /Infidelity
Warnings ā Language/ SMUT-Breast play/ nipple play/ grinding/nipple orgasms(with grinding)/ INFIDELITY
Word count ā 12k (š)
a/n- Okay I'm a liar. So much for trying to keep the word count under 10k. Sorry for lying. But I love this chapter. Hope you'll love it too. Oh, and the taglists are open. And you can send asks if you want to. I'm curious to know what y'all thinking. Thank you for reading. ā„ļø
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Jimin avoids you. Like you are the plague.
You are so pissed. Like the momma bear he said you were.
You have no memory of how your night at the club ended. Only that you woke up on your bed the next day. With a throbbing head. And a killer hangover. Another week has passed since that day. Your life went from misery to anguish. To an unbearable pain. You are still struggling with your sleeping patterns, your lectures and job. You are running out of your poor excuses. Key is always on your throat. This switching between two worlds still happens, with no answers or solutions. But nothing makes you madder than Park Jimin.
Itās humiliating to be honest. That he avoids you. You donāt know whatās worse. Whether itās that he always managed to disappear before you wake up or itās that youāre worried about that, after everything. He advanced toward you first. He touched you first. He kissed you first. You know why he does what he does. That, however, doesnāt make it a good reason. You canāt find it in you to be unconcerned. You are very concerned. He is a fucking coward.
Fuck him!
You scream loudly. Knowing well that no one is inside this damn apartment. Kick the comforter away. It has only been you for four days now. This is the fifth day you are waking up in this fancy apartment alone. Oh, how you wish you could have the controller of this game. How great it would be if you could start avoiding him too. Why would you care this much? Itās frustrating.
It has taken every ounce of your strength not to destroy something to show your anger. To take a lipstick and write down āYou fucking asshole! Go to hell!ā, in his bathroom mirror. Or to write down a letter using all the vengeful, insulting words you know. Thank God that you have some dignity left in you that you did nothing of the sort. Thank God you managed to come and go without leaving a trace of your existence.
You sigh heavily, watching your reflection in the bathroom mirror. Thereās dark circles under your eyes. Your skin looks dry. Drier than the Sahara. Simply put, you look like shit. Youāll have to find a way to make this work if this isnāt going to stop. If you canāt find answers, you need to find a way to stay alive. You still donāt know if Jimin has talked with Liya. If he did what she said. Where she is all these times you spend here. Because certainly there was no sign of her being at your apartment. Yours and Jiminās assumption was that she might be waking up somewhere that isnāt your apartment. Jimin wasnāt very convinced. Said she would be freaking out the next day if something like that happened.
Oh, how you want to scream at him. This isnāt going anywhere this way. He was adamant of trying to find a way to stop this quickly a few weeks ago. And now he acts like this isnāt a problem at all. What can you do after all? You are in a fancy ass apartment with no communication for fucks sake. Your phone doesnāt work here. Isnāt compatible with wi-fi. You still donāt know if you could try using a SIM card. Itās not like you can go out and find out with no money in your hand. And itās getting damn cold outside.
You have poked your head inside couple of rooms. Found some electronic devices which were either dead or ancient. Found a laptop protected with password and you didnāt try to unlock it. In the end, while you are in this world, you are isolated from the rest of the human race. No internet. No communication. No Jimin. No way of entertaining yourself for the few hours you spend here.
Itās all his fault. Despite all the frustrating fascinations you found with him, you managed to bottle them up and act normal. He destroyed it all. Ruined. And then he has the nerve to avoid you like itās all on you.
You rinse your mouth off. Splash your face with water. Aggressively. Why the fucking hell do you want Jimin to be here. He is annoying anyway. Why are you angry that he ruined your āperfect strangerāsā relationship. Angry that he avoids you. Why do you fucking care? You for yourself have no idea why you are mad. Or at what you are mad. You are a complete mess. Itās just you are mad you can kill a man with a crochet hook.
You pat your face with a dry towel. Itās more slapping than patting. Throw the towel away. Leave the bathroom to head toward kitchen when thereās a sharp pang in your lower stomach, making you stop in the track. Anger dissipates. Replaces with the pain. You close your eyes shut. It comes again. Subsidies. Comes again. Nothing unfamiliar to you. You know what it means when thereās random pains in your body.
You have a messed-up period cycle. You always keep pads and tampons with you. Knew that your monthly pal is near for a probable two days now. There has been slight pains in your pelvic region. Today itās intense, which means your friend has finally arrived. Fuck your life. There is your reason to hate the whole world. No, to hate every single world that exists in every fucking universe. You donāt want to deal with cramps right now. Donāt want to have your period while youāre at someone elseās house. It always sucks. Especially, when you have no pads or any kind or period products with you.
Fuck! You have no pads. You straighten up. Eyes wide. What are you going to do? Use tissues? Maybe you can find Liyaās. You turn around again. Rush to the main bathroom. Start rummaging through bathroom cabinet drawers. One by one. And of course there is none. No pads or tampons. Only things you find are damn period cups. There are couple but youāre not sure which are used ones.
You stand in the middle of the bathroom. Have no idea what you are going to do now. And the pain is slowly becoming unbearable. Of course it is. You have bad cramps. You live your life on pain killers during your periods. You need to get something for your pain before it becomes severe. Before you become a crying mess. You do the best you can. With tissues. Thatās not going to last at all, but you can find something for the pain. Fall asleep as fast as possible. You search through bathroom cabinet drawers again. Through the drawers in the room. In kitchen. Of fucking course, you canāt find anything, again. What are these people? Androids? How could they not have painkillers in their home? How come Liya doesnāt have pads for emergency situations? You found some pills. Yes. But you have no idea what those for are. Not going to risk your life here.
You crouch down next to the fridge. Pain is intense now. You canāt even stand on your own feet. Itās like your uterus is about to fall. You need to think. About a way to solve this problem. Is hard when your mind is clouded with pain. You are scared to sit down on a chair. What if you stain it? Itāll be so embarrassing.
Deep breaths in. Deep breaths out.
You take deep breaths. There is no way you could fall asleep with this kind of pain. You need pads or anything to help with the blood bath happening between your thighs. You need painkillers. And you have no money and youāre not going to steal money from this house. You are in too much pain to do something like that. Thereās only one person you can ask for help. Not that you want to talk to him. He avoids you. Donāt want to appear desperate. Still, the pain is too intense.
There is no communication. You hate that some people decided to rely on smartphones completely. Hate that Jimin and Liya are apparently those kinds of people. Have no landline in their house. You canāt simply bother with trying to unlock locked devices. Your brain isnāt functioning properly at all when you yank the main door open. Reach the only other apartment on this floor. Knock at their door. It opens fast for your relief, revealing a young woman probably on her 30s. She gapes at you. More than surprised.
āUhā¦Iā¦ Iām really sorry but can I make a phone call?ā How stupid this whole ordeal is. What are you doing in front of a strangerās door and asking for a fucking phone. Shouldāve died in your pain. Middle of a blood pool, than this. What were you thinking? The woman raises her eyebrows with her eyes wide. āWell, yeah, but are you okay Liya? You look pale? Why are you here to make a phone call? Whereās Jimin?ā There are so many questions leaving her mouth but the only one that registered on your brain is āare you okay Liyaā.
Shit, you forgot that you look like Liya. Now this might look even more ridiculous in this womanās eye. You donāt even know her name. You are supposed to be Liya and this woman, in that case, is your neighbor. You try to smile. āIāmā¦ fine. I just uh... broke my phone andā¦ā You donāt know what you should say. āIām not okay actually.ā That feel better than trying to find excuses. āI just need to call Jimin, and I donāt remember his number. Phoneās broken and Iā¦ can you please?ā You blurt that out. Whatever happens next, youāll deal with it later. Blood will start running down your legs at this rate.
She stares at you for a minute. And then nods and holds the door for you. Invites you inside and gives you her phone. Thank fuck, she has his number saved. You thank her over and over before dialing his number. Listen to the ringback tone. You absolutely donāt want to do this. Donāt want to talk to Jimin. Ugh, itās better if you could call Lee Seung than Jimin. The woman walks away to give you privacy. You watch her retrieve into a room while biting onto your thumb nail. You are just about to bite your whole finger away when the phone is answered.
āMrs. Lee?ā Jiminās voice reaches your ear through the phone. Thereās concern laced in his voice. He needs to say hello first. You take a deep breath before speaking. Feel like you have telephobia.
āUh hello! Jimin, itās me...ā You donāt know if he can recognize you. He will think you are Liya. āSpring Roll?ā Oh no he doesnāt think you are Liya. Funny how he went from not recognizing your very obvious differences to recognizing your voice apart from Liya. Or he just knows itās your day to be here.
āHey? Are you okay Lil? Whatās happening? Why are you likeā¦ Why are you at Leeās?ā He asks again when you donāt answer. You didnāt realize you hadnāt answered. You scrunch your eyes shut and grit your teeth to endure a sharp cramp. āNo. I mean Iām fine butā¦ Jiminā¦ I need... uhā¦ā It feels embarrassing. āLil? What is it?ā You can hear him shuffle around. Makes you wonder if he is already leaving. Like an obsessed lover in a stupid love story.
āI need umā¦ā
āYes?ā
āI need pads. I need pain killers.ā You finally get that out.
Itās fine. Itās fine.
āSorry but I have no money and thereās no way to contact anyone and it hurts and-ā You start again. Feel the need to explain your situation when he disrupts your rambling.
āOkay.ā A silence. āHey Lil? Itās okay.ā Another silence. He is probably waiting for you to respond. You donāt. So, he speaks again. āIāll come. Go home now.ā With that he hangs up.
Home?
ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
You blink at the stupid door. You had closed it behind you when you left the apartment. And now itās locked. You donāt know the password. A quiet groan escapes your mouth as you slightly bang your forehead on the door. Why does your life always go from bad to worse? Itās not like you can just go back and knock on Leeās door. No, you canāt do that. Itās better to stay here, waiting for Jimin to come. So, you do that. Crouch down again because it hurts bad. Lean your back against the door. Wait... When you are not in pain and can form coherent thoughts, youāll slap yourself and then later kill Jimin- even though he is the one helping you.
ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
It probably took more than thirty fucking minutes for him to come. Tears are rolling down your cheeks, and you are at verge of passing out, when you finally hear the elevator ding. Tissues are failing you and you are about to cry all over again for the embarrassment when your head snaps towards the sound of footsteps. Eyes landing on Jimin. On a black suit again. Like the last time you saw him. He has a grocery bag in his hands. He stops. Eyes on you. Takes a shaky breath in and approaches you like wind. Crouches down beside you.
āFuck. What are you doing here? Are you okay?ā He slightly touches your face. You shake your head. āNo. It hurts. Bad.ā You canāt be embarrassed now.
āFuck Iām sorry it took some time to come Lil. But why are you here? Outside?ā His eyes are wide. Mouth a little agape. Adorable. You clutch your stomach tightly. āI... ha...ve no password. I... donāt kn... know it.ā You manage through gritted teeth. Jimin sighs, closing his eyes for a moment. Lamenting. Looks like he wants to slap himself.
āShit. Shit, Iām sorry Lil. I forgot, likeā¦ā
You interrupt his pointless apologizing with a painful whine. Youāre not his responsibility after all. Itās not like he should be here. Jimin gapes at you, mouth open, for a split second. Nods his head in realization. Surprises you when he suddenly grabs you from your upper arm. Makes sense when he reaches for the lock and enters the password. He holds you steady, so you wonāt fall. He holds you steady, so you wonāt get into your feet on your own. Stops you when you try to. Surprises you again when he cradles you. You yelps first in surprise and then in mortification.
āNo, Jimin. Thereās probably ā¦ā You donāt get to complete that sentence. Not as he enters the house. Kicks the door shut behind you.
āFuck it.ā
ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
āYou fine now?ā Jimin softly asks you as he stares at your huddled figure, laying on your side. He stands next to the bed. You feel fairly fine now compared to earlier. Not completely, though. Pain isnāt going to subside just after you swallow some pills. You nod anyway. You are now perfectly curled up in his guest bed. All clean and tummy full. In his clothes since you said you shouldnāt wear Liyaās clothes all the time without her permission. Ready to sleep with your phone and your clothes pressed to your chest. You learned from your mistakes and evolved through the time youāve been here. Thatās how you learned to dress properly to bed. Even with a bra, despite how much you hate to wear it. From now on, youāll make sure you carry a care package to bed with you. With every essential in there.
āYou sure?ā Jimin asks again, slightly bending down toward you. You crack an eye open to look at him. He is still in his dress shirt. Looks worried. It was ridiculous how you had to assure him again and again that you will not die and are fully capable of showering alone. He is a funny thing. Jimin is. Paradoxical. Complicated. You find him hard to read. āIām fine Jimin. It hurts but Iāll be okay. This shit happens every month.ā You state matter-of-factly. Jimin snorts. Sits on the edge of the bed. āYou sure? Cause you sure did act like it was your first time.ā Thereās a ghost of a smile on his lips. He has been avoiding you for nearly a week and now acts like nothing happened. Pisses you off. You take a breath in to calm yourself down.
āWell, I always take something for my pain and itās not like I always ended up in some strangerās houseā¦You know? With no pads and...ā Your words trail off as you watch Jimin grins now. He is teasing you. Asshole. āOh, fuck you Jimin. It was an emergency. Sorry I bothered you.ā You grumble, trying to hide your face in the pillow. āHey, no Lil, I was just joking and uh... anyway you didnāt bother me. Itās okay to ask for help sometimes. Iām glad you did. If it hurts then it hurts.ā He places his hand on your arm. Makes you shudder. His voice is serious now.
You sneak a peek at him again. He and you need to talk. Talk about what happened last time he was close to you. You need to convince him too. Convince that you were drunk and forget it ever happened. This moment, however, doesnāt feel like the right time. Youāre still in pain and itās always easy to procrastinate. Itās okay to let it slide for this one last time. You and Jimin were on good terms before the club night happened. With playful banters and insults that didnāt actually hurt you both. You were kind of friends. Right? Perfect strangers? Thereās no reason to be hostile or distance when he is the only person you know in this world. You can sweep it under the rug until you take it out again. So, you nod. Mutter a soft thank you.
āI wouldnāt have call you anyway if I had you knowā¦ I justā¦ Fuck.ā You donāt know what you should say.
Jimin smiles. His cheeks puffs out like soft, round loaves of bread. You madly want to squeeze them.
Nope. You donāt.
āItās okay Lil. It was an emergency, like you said. I know you wouldnāt have reached me if it wasnāt. But are you gonna be okay alone? Like do you want me to stay?ā He asks, through his grin. Adorable but is so dramatic. You roll your eyes.
āItās just periods Jimin. I know I was crying but believe me I will not die, I promise.ā
āYou promise?ā
āYes. I promise. Happy? You can go to work now Mr. CEO. You have a business...ā You wince. Grit your teeth. Blow a breath out. āā¦to run, donāt you?ā Complete your sentence finally. Random cursed cramps. Jimin gives you a skeptical glance. Doesnāt say anything when he stands up. You watch him curiously when he rounds the bed and climbs up next to you. This is not good. This, definitely, isnāt good. What is he doing?
āOkayā¦? What are you doing?ā You mumble with wide eyes. āNothing. Just going to make sure you wonāt actually die.ā He says as laying back. Eyes on the celling. You turn to your back too. āSeriously Jimin? This is ridiculous. You can go. Besides, isnāt this weird for you to lay here with me?ā Look at him with your head turned to his face. āI wake up next to you every other day spring roll. And most of the time, you cling to me like a koala.ā He says that very nonchalantly when you choke on your own spit. Do you? You gape at him. Do you really do that? Jiminās bread cheeks are appearing again, however. He is trying so bad not to break into a laugh. You groan annoyingly. āYou little stupidā¦.ā Mumble every curse word you know as you turn your side again. Your back to him. Jimin giggles. Why does he have to be adorable all the time? Why do you have to think he is adorable all the time? And hot. And...
This time you are grateful for the sudden pain that make you reel. It distracts you from Jimin. Even though it makes you whimper quietly and squeeze your tummy. Grit your teeth hard and leave you exhausted when it subsides. You take a deep breath after the pain become bearable. Feel Jimin shifts behind you. Maybe he turns to his side too. Thereās a beat of silence before his voice reaches you again.
āAre you really okay Lil? Does it hurt a bad?ā His voice is too soft for your liking. Makes your heart picks up the speed of pumping blood.
Bad.
You just nod to indicate you are indeed fine when another cramp hits you. He shifts again. Closer to you this time. You are certain. Can feel his warmth on your back now. Makes you tingle all over. This is really bad. And itās worsen when he speaks again.
āWant me to help you? Do something to soothe the pain?ā Jimin whispers. Makes goosebumps appear on your skin. Makes the hair in the nape of your neck stand. You shot your eyes open, staring into dark blue curtains of the room. Heart now beating violently. What does he mean?
āHelp me how?ā Your body has started to react exactly like that time in the club. Funny, since he isnāt touching you this time. You donāt even know what he is insinuating at. He might well be saying that he would tell you a bedtime story and you are already panting. āI... uh...donāt know. Like rub your tummy like. Fuck I donāt know Lil. Anything to help you.ā His voice is still a whisper, and you shudder. Again. Oh, he indefinitely is not going to tell you bedtime stories. Why would he suggest this at all?
The air in the room suddenly feels heavy. You two are going to fuck things up for a second time if you donāt say the right thing.
All you need to say is, āare you crazy? I donāt want you touching me, Park Jimin. Thatās so wrong. Go to hellā. Then why are you nodding.
This is a disaster.
You stiffen when you feel him scoot closer. Not quite in contact with your body but you are sure just a light movement from you, would make your back plastered into his chest. Can feel his breath on your neck. Like the last time. Makes your head spin. Like the last time. Mouth dry and heart about to leap away. Like the last time. And you are poised. Anticipation firing inside you. Excitement bubbling. Not even trying to soothe your dry throat. As if one single moment from you will make him disappear. āWant me to Lil?ā He asks again. Fuck its addicting how his breath fanning your neck when he speaks. You nod again, weakly. āWords Lil. Say you want me to.ā Jimin doesnāt even move a finger. Just stays close to you. This surely doesnāt feel like trying to soothe your pain. Instead, feel like you are doing something immoral. Well, it is immoral. You need to use your words and say you donāt want his help. Shouldnāt let this carry away like the last time.
āYes. Help me Jimin.ā You mutter breathlessly. To hell with it. You donāt know what you are doing. āSoothe the pain you know. Itās okay since you are trying to help.ā Add that part just for the sake of your sanity. To justify the situation. To make it fair and mitigate. You expect Jimin to laugh at that. Snort. Asks you to stop being a bitch and then trying to justify your bitchy actions. If you are bad, then you are bad. He doesnāt. He doesnāt do any of those things. Surprisingly, agrees with you. āYes, Iām just trying to help.ā You are certain he says it to himself more than to you. You nod in agreement anyway. Wait until he do something. Patiently. Holding your breath. Let that breath out with a shiver when he finally snakes his hand over your waist. Palm flat and places on your tummy. Over your (his) hoodie. āLike this?ā Asks again and start to rub gentle circles all over your stomach. You donāt trust your voice. Are afraid youāll moan. All you can do is nod.
Fortunate how he doesnāt ask you to use your word. You think this situation is embarrassing. How you are near moaning when he is just rubbing your stomach. Thereās nothing more but you are becoming pliant. Turning into a mush under his touch. Thatās exactly how it was the last time. Youāre pathetic arenāt you?
You visibly shudder when his breath hits your sensitive skin every time. It feels good. You wonāt lie. Even when you canāt feel his touch properly, it feels damn good. Enough to make you sigh in relief. āAm I doing it right?ā Jimin whispers in your ear. A weak yes escapes your mouth. āDoes it help? Do you want more?ā He scoots closer to you more. Finally press his chest into your back.
Oh God!
You donāt know what you should say. In a world where you are a completely sane person, you would say yes that helps and you donāt want anything more. This world, however, is a world where you are completely insane. So, you say no, for the first question. So, you say yes, for the latter one. Jimin sighs heavily. Almost like he is beyond relieved with your answers. As if he waited for you to say them.
āOkay. Iāll push your hoodie up. Huh? Just want to soothe the pain. That way will be better.ā He waits again until you say yes. Give him the green light to proceed. The thing is, he needs to stop asking because you wonāt say no. You feel like you are high. Your brain is malfunctioning. Bite your bottom lip until the blood draws when he does push the hoodie up, after another one of your weak yesā. Touches your bare tummy. Directly touches your skin for the first time. Without any barriers and you are certain he feels how you tremble.
It's just fingers first. Drawing mindless, yet burning patterns on your hot skin. And then he is pressing those fingers on your skin. Then painfully slowly his entire palm. Touches you properly. Massages your soft muscles. His hand is all over your tummy.
āThis good?ā Asks again. Makes you annoyed.
āYes. Please.ā Fuck why did you say please. What are you begging for. Youāre really glad he doesnāt ask. Just keeps caressing you. Rubbing. Massaging. Touches turning tender every time. Comes even more closer to you. Hides his face in your hair. You weakly whimper when you feel him inhaling. A feathery kiss following. He brings you Impossibly closer to him.
āLil...ā Breathes in your ear.
āHm?ā
āFuck. Just?ā
āWhat?ā Your voice is barely audible.
āCan I? Please?ā His voice is no different. Husky. Breathy. And feels like liquid honey to your ears.
You know what he is asking for. You shouldnāt but you do. This is the only chance for you to do the right thing. At least pretend dumb and stop him.
āYes. Jiminā¦.yes.ā How desperate you sound. The only relief is the shudder you feel on Jiminās body. āThanks fuck.ā Says as his hand starts wandering upwards. Up, up and up. You give up trying to keep your mouth shut. Allow yourself to softly moan when his hand reaches your ribcage. Touches you there properly. Fingers graze the underside of your boobs. But doesnāt go any further. Stops there. Drives you crazy.
No, you shouldnāt ask for it. Shouldnāt beg.
āFuck Jimin. Please.ā
Jimin hides his face in your neck. His grip on you tighten. āPlease what?ā Loves to make you little more miserable than you are. It seems. āPlease what Lil? What do you want?ā Asks again in your ear. You want to go back to your bickering selves and curse the shit out of him. Impossible when he gives you feathery touches under your left boob. So, you give up.
āTouch me. Please fuck touch me.ā Ask for what you want like a good girl. Jimin curses. āTouch you where? I am touching you.ā Says as he squeezes you tightly. You whimper again. This time in complaint. He doesnāt do anything though. Waits patiently for your answer. Well, fuck it!
āTits. My tits Jimin. Please touch them.ā You donāt say those words, you moan them. Jimin kisses your ear at that. āFuck Lil.ā Mumbles in your ear and then his hand goes to where you want it to be. Grabs your left boob in his palm. Grips it hard. Molds. Sighs heavily.
āFuck you are not wearing a bra again?ā Traces his thumb over your hardened nipple. Takes it between his thumb and forefinger, pinch it. Makes you twitch. Do it again and again. āIā¦ J... Jimin. Iā¦ā Your voice is trembling. āItās hot.ā Jimin says mindlessly. Shifts the attention between your two breasts. Molds them so good that you are moaning without you realizing. Makes Jimin press himself firmly against you.
It feels so sudden. Like the time in club. Why do you do this? He and you? Why neither of you can think properly? You are not drunk now. Very sober and still do this.
It's very wrong. Immoral. Unfaithful. Yet, itās happening. And it is so fucking good. Youāve been starving for touch, and you are incapable of refusing one when you finally receive it. Especially, when those touches belongs to someone like Park Jimin. Youāll think about the reasons later. For now, youāll just give up. Let him play. Touch you right. Allow him more access to do it more. Thatās why you slowly start to roll onto your back. To let him touch you more. He helps you. Shits in his place and snakes his hand under your neck. Curls that hand so you become impossibly close to him. Keeps groping your soft mounds. Like he canāt stop doing so.
You look at him for the first time after you started this. Are so happy to see him flushed. Similar to you. Eyes hooded and pupils dilated. Mesmerizing. Comes closer to your face. Breath fanning your lips now. For split second you think heāll kiss you. Disappointingly, he doesn't. Murmurs against your mouth instead.
āThey are so soft. Your tits. Fucking soft. Wanna touch them all the time.ā His lips slightly brush against yours when he mumbles. You moan shamelessly. You were turned on in an inhuman way from the beginning. Now though, you think youāll die. You smell him in. Want to tell him he can just do that. Feel like you are travelling through the clouds. Words fail you. Only breathless whimpers and monas leave your dry mouth.
āWill you show me, Lil?ā Asks again since all you do is gaping. Itās already too late turn around now. You rub your thighs together. Clench around nothing. āPlease? Just want to see.ā Squeezes your left tit so hard that a cry rip through your throat. Back arching. You nod desperately. āYes. Yes. Yes, you can.ā Close your eyes to drown in the head spinning feeling. Only for a moment though. Open them slowly again when you feel Jimin shifts your hoodie up. Revealing your bare skin to him. You are not surprised anymore. Just painfully horny. The way his breathing staggered, makes the sensation double. He pushes the hoodie all the way up. Toward your neck. Gets your tits bare in front of his eyes.
āShit. Fuck Lil.ā Curses some more. Molds your tits some more. Props himself a little bit. You reluctantly raise your head to let his hand go. Leans over you. Grabs your tits with his both hands. Start groping and molding. Sanity is slipping through his fingers as you watch. You and him both are insane now. You keep leaning into his touches. Harsh and pleasurable ministrations. Moan his name.
āShit you are gorgeous.ā
āYou have seen them Jimin.ā
āThis is different. Fuck. I wanna suck them.ā He peeks at you through his lashes. The desperation in his face together with his words are enough to make you cum in your pants. You want to say yes but words arenāt coming out. Especially, when he presses a tender kiss to one of your nipples. Pulls back to look at your face. Then kisses the other one. Doesnāt pull back this time, just stays in his place and inhales. Smells you. āFuck!ā Curses. You want to say yes.
He doesnāt wait for your answer anyway. And you are glad. āWant them in my mouth Lil. Gonna suck them, okay? Gonnaā¦ fuck.ā He gives up entirely. Gives up on talking. Explaining. Dives right into your tits. Takes one hardened bud in his mouth. And you find words. āHoly fuck Jimin... Oh god...ā You nearly cry. Hands reaching his head. Fingers lacing through his blonde locks. You have sensitive nipples but this? His mouth does wonders apparently. His hot tongue swirls around your nipple. Sucks on them. Moans. Sucks your life out of you. Keeps groping the other one. Then takes the other nipple in mouth while squeezing the now free one. Kisses and sucks every inch of skin he can find on your tits. Lightly bites. Leaves your tits wet with his saliva. You like the feeling. Even love it when he starts sucking on your skin harder. Surely giving you marks.
āFuck, you are so sensitive. Think you can cum like this?ā Jimin asks so suddenly that you are beginning to be surprised again. Itās so out of blue. āWhat?ā You ask through your whimpers. āCum Lil. Can you cum while I suck on your tits?ā Asks again. Doesnāt wait for your answer and goes back to his work. Well, you donāt think youāll completely be able to do that. Without a single pressure on your clit or nothing close to your quivering hole. āIām notā¦ suā¦sure. Like I need... Jimin.ā You tug from his hair. He moans. You donāt think he understand what you are trying to say. See, now Jimin will never cease to amaze you. Can read minds. Doesnāt say anything but completely hovers over you. Places one knee between your thighs. Presses. You shudder. Reel. Moan. Watch the way Jimin peeks at you again. One of your tits still in his mouth. Moaning against your nipple. Pops it out. Kisses your wet nipple and bites it lightly. Licks it.
āCāmon, go on. Rub your pussy on my knee.ā Says against your tit before starting to suck on it again.
And of course you do. How are you to refuse such a demanding plea. Press his face more into your chest and start grinding your cunt on his knee. Desperate. Hard. Fast. And he keeps sucking your tits. Soaking them. Encourages you with grunts and groans. Vibrations he cause travel through your body like liquid fire. To your core and makes that knot in your tummy tighten. Tighten with every press of your cunt on his knee. Even though itās through layers of clothing. With his every suck on your tit. And right at a moment when he bites little harsh on your right nipple that knot explodes. Making you cry for him. Your grip on his hair tighten. Nearly rip his hair off when he finally pops your nipple from his mouth. Stares into your flushed face. Smirks. Peppers some light kisses to your abused tits. Makes you flush with embarrassment.
You both take a moment. Jimin is still grabbing and holding your breasts. You are staring into the ceiling. Both of you taking deep breaths. Trying to calm down from your high. Jimin retrieves his hands from your breasts slowly. The stupor you were in breaking down. Shattering into little pieces, so you could see properly. Think properly again. And the very moment, unclouded thoughts occur in your mind, you sit back abruptly. Making Jimin do the same. Both of you inhaling a shaky yet deep breath. Just like that, you two fucked up again. It doesnāt make sense how you lose control. How he loses control.
You want to ask him why? See, now it was only you who reached a high and he didnāt. Does he want the same? Are you willing to give him that? If he doesnāt want that, why did he do that for you? Is this the same kind of situation where he was confused? No, he kept calling you Lil. Not Liya.
You stare at his face. His face is flushed still but calming down. Eyes starting to flash something else which is not desire. Regret perhaps. You want to ask million things.
āDonāt fucking run away Jimin.ā Thatās the only thing that leaves your mouth. He shakes his head at that. Blows a breath out.
āI wonāt. Just sleep. We will talk.ā He says. Thereās no warmth or softness in his voice anymore. His voice isnāt husky or breathy. Just like the last time, he is very serious now. Only that he isnāt stuttering. Nor does he run away like you burn him. Still, he and you are both back on earth now. He stares at you for another hard minute. Then he climbs down from the bed.
āWe will talk Lil. I promise.ā Says before running away. Again.
You fucked up. Again.
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āOkay for real young lady, I donāt buy anything you say.ā Key screeches in your ear as you try to wipe the tables down. End your shift and go home. Key isnāt supposed to be here, and sheās annoying you so much. āWell, I donāt know what I should say to you then my dear best friend. Move out of the way please. I have works to do.ā You nudge her out of your way with your hip. She scoffs. āYou should tell me the truth bitch. Whatās happening in your life? How come you miss so many lectures and where the hell are you going all that time?ā She keeps trailing after you. From one table to another.
āDo you have a secret boyfriend or something? So, you fuck around with him and miss your lectures? Are You fucking crazy? Whoās going to pay for you to repeat the subjectsā¦.ā Her nagging is becoming unbearable, and you are glad Chan interrupts you. āYou gonna fail your subjects?ā He asks with a look thatās torn between pissed and incredulous on his face. You take back the glad part. You groan. Throw the cleaning cloth on your hand onto the table. āNo one boss. No oneās failing their classes. My best friend is just fucking dramatic.ā You point your finger at her.
She gasps. See, dramatic. āDonāt talk to me like that you little brat. Iām worrying my life away here for you.ā Turns to Chan. āSheās been going MIA for some time now. Doesnāt attend lectures. I canāt reach her. And she sometimes doesnāt come to work too. Doesnāt she Chan?ā Starts nagging to him instead of you. Fine by you to be honest. This is the first time in a while you are here at your workplace at the same time with Chan and Key. You guess Chan hasnāt confessed his feelings for Key yet. She would tell you if he did. Surprisingly, you donāt feel much bitter about it now.
You found out that you can talk to Chan normally a few days ago. Without any hard feelings and not wanting to cry nor slap him. And now you are finding out that you can stay in the same room with both of them. It hasnāt been that long since your rejection. Just nearly a month but probably the things happening in your life makes the rest of your life problems insignificant.
āItās only been couple of days. So, itās just fine.ā Chan answers Keyās question with a shrug. Doesnāt sit properly with Key apparently. āOh, cāmonā¦ How thatās not fucking concerning Chan. Itās very irresponsible of an employee to be unattended without prior-ā
āFuck Key. Are you my friend or enemy?ā You interrupt her while sneaking a glance at Chan. He is unbothered. Thereās a grin on his face. As if Key said the most adorable thing right now. Well, if thatās how he always looked at her, then you might have been blind. āThatās fine Key. She is just not an employee. We are kind of friends so, as long as you donāt disappear for like weeks and months thatās fine with me.ā He says finally, looking between you and Key. Key sighs while you nod in assent.
āWell, that makes this situation even more concerning. As a friend of her you need be worried as I am. What if she planning to sell her kidney.ā Key doesnāt want to accept defeat. She has been constantly nagging you lately. Nothing you say is believable anymore. You have said you are sick so many times that Yoon-hee, your favorite professor, told you that you can ask her help if your illness is terminal. They might think youāre dying at this rate. Itās reasonable and very fair that Key is worried. You would be too. Canāt tell her the real reason though.
āIām just fine Key. Please stop worrying. And my kidneys are safe.ā You pat your lower back before reaching for the cleaning cloth again. Look back at her. āI promise. If I really am in a problem, I will tell you. You know that already.ā Say as you start to wipe down the tables. Miss the glance Key and Chan share.
āYou will?ā Key asks, finally accepting the defeat.
āI will.ā You nod without looking at them.
āI meant it when I said we are friends, you know. You can ask for help if you want, my very hard-working employee.ā Chan adds when he isnāt a part of this at all. You and he are not that close friends. You were once infatuated with him, but not anymore. Still, you nod. Say you know.
Itās better you figure things out soon before you fuck up things in this world as well. Now, after you officially ruined things in Jiminās world, you want this switching to end as soon as possible. Youāll find a way. Yes. You will.
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This is the most unproductive Jimin has been in his entire life. He was far better than this when he was a college fuck boy and didnāt give a damn about passing his subjects. Even then he did a better job than staring at his computer screen. Black. It has been exactly fifteen minutes since he sat here in his study. He has work to do, but canāt concentrate. His mind is everywhere. No, thatās a big lie. His mind isnāt everywhere but at two people. Two people who look exactly same but not at the same time.
Why did he allow that to happen. Not once, but twice. Did he really think you were Liya? No. He didnāt. Jimin found a simple answer for his questions after loads of thinking. He really is a fucking asshole. Just like you said. He knew what he was doing but still did. Knew it was wrong but threw morality out the window the moment he felt you. And he fucked up.
The day at the club, when he returned to your booth to find you and that jerk named Jungkook were gone. Gone for a fucking dance. Jimin had felt his guts twist with an unfamiliar rage. He wasnāt or isnāt the jealousy type. Besides, you werenāt his girlfriend or anyone else that mattered to him. Still, he found his legs working on their own as he drifted to the dance floor. Saw you with him. Smiling. Laughing. Felt the same pang he felt when he saw you with Taehyung that day earlier. Saw he turns you around. Touches you. And he wasnāt thinking at all when he started storming toward you. He had a good excuse in his mind. You were supposed to be Liya. Liya will never do that. And only she knows why. It didnāt matter though. What mattered only was that you were breaking the character, and he needed to cover it. Before you ruin everything.
Funny, how he was the one who ruined things afterwards. It was pure bliss when he felt your body against him. Simply, the moment he felt you he started to think with his dick. Itās simple as that. Thatās what happened at both times. He did his best to stay away from you after the club. Doesnāt know why he felt that it was the best decision. That it would solve the problem. He, after all, kind of knew he would fuck up again, if he was to be with you. Just like he thought, he did. Fucked up. And what he did was cheating.
Jimin cringes visibly at his own thoughts. He left that life behind, didnāt he? When he met Liya. When he started his business. He left his playful life behind. He is not Taehyung; he stopped jumping into fire pits just because itās fun. Those stupid decisions people make just because they feel good at the moment, always come back to bite in their asses. Exactly like now. Like Jimin is drowning in misery full of guilt and regret. Guilty toward Liya. Regret toward you. Because even if itās for a little while Jimin knows you. Even if you and he may not have a proper tag on your relationship. It was fine. The relationship you had. It was fine. More than fine actually and he ruined it.
His miserable thoughts got startle out of him, making him jump on his seat when the door of the study room suddenly slammed open. He snaps his head to the door at the same time Liya barges in. Thatās not very like her. She knows how to knock after all. And she looks wearied off. Jimin watches curiously as his girlfriend takes a seat. Slams her bag on the desk. Makes Jimin flinch.
āWhatās going on?ā He asks carefully.
āI missed my meeting with Owen Scott. With the āOwen Scottā. Yesterday. Because I slept through it and the deal ruined Jimin. Can you believe that? I lost this one chance to partner with Scott. My dad is going to kill me.ā Liya vents. Jimin feels like she slaps him. She missed that meeting while, he was fondling with your breasts happily. Has to bite his tongue so he wonāt say something stupid. Oh, the guilt starts to tear his conscience away.
āOh! I mean, thatās bad but reach to him againā¦.?ā He says after carefully deciding thatās the best reply. Liya gives him an incredulous look. āDonāt talk like you donāt know business Jimin. If you missed, you missed. Thereās no going back.ā She slumps her shoulders. Then puts her hand on the desk. Let her head falls down between her hands.
āWho said that to you?ā Jimin doesnāt think Liya is here to talk business. They rarely do that. Live in two different worlds. He wants her to go. This is really uncomfortable. How much of a dick he is. āMy father of course. But thatās not the problem Jimin. I keep sleeping through the days. It happened more than one time, are you aware?ā Liya raises her head back. To give Jimin an accusatory look. Jimin wasnāt in a good mood to begin with. And that mood starts to get worsen when Liya silently, but definitely accuses Jimin. She does that all the time. Even his guilty conscience starts to dissipate at her accusatory look.
āAnd thatās my fault? That you sleep through your meetings?ā He feels like shit when he says that, however. Itās not his fault, to be fair. But still he knows whatās happening yet never tried to explain that to her. Maybe this is his chance to bring that subject up. He promised you he would talk to Liya. But after the club he felt too cowardly to face either of you. For different reasons.
Jimin feels heavy. Bile rising up his throat. He cheated on her. Their relationship might not be the best but still cheating never was something they had both done. Ever. Not even when he canāt remember when they last had sex.
Yes, thatās it. Thatās why he was so out of control with you. Sexually deprived. Never felt the need to find a woman to satiate his needs since he was so busy. That, however, in the end doesnāt change the fact he is human. So doesnāt the fact it was wrong.
āNo. Howās that your fault?ā She questions back. Keeps her gaze on Jiminās face. Makes him uneasy. God, he needs to come clean, doesnāt he? How though? This is a very complicated matter. āNo, I should have woken you up.ā He says timidly in the end. Voice barely a whisper. Liya certainly doesnāt expect that if the way her eyebrows raise is anything. Jimin canāt wake her up even if he wants to. And he doesnāt know what he should do. You and he will have to do something soon. Liya nods slightly. Says that it wasnāt his fault, and she doesnāt expect him to do that. Surely is about to say something else when Jimin beats her to it.
Itās now or never.
āBaby, are you sure you are just sleeping through days?ā The term of endearment feels heavy on his tongue. She looks confuse for a moment. Her perfect brows pull together. āWhat do you mean?ā Asks. āUhā¦ like... are you having weird dreams?ā He praises himself for coming up with that.
āLike what kind of dreams?ā
āI donāt know. Like any kind of dream. Vivid dreams I mean.ā Waits hopefully for her answer. āNoā¦ No, I donāt dream at all, I think. Itās like Iām dead while Iām sleeping.ā Says making Jimin feel even more miserable. How is he ever going to clear this mess. He just nods. āThatās good. I mean at least you are not having any bad dreams.ā Says as he finally turns his computer on. Liya clears her throat again, however. Jimin thought she would leave, but of course that canāt be the reason why she is here. They donāt share their problems. She isnāt here to vent about her issues like she should.
āWell? You are not here to tell me your life sucks, are you?ā Jimin pays his attention back to Liya, lips curling up slightly despite thereās nothing amusing happening. Liya blows a breath out before taking another one in. āNo. Iām here to tell you that I canāt make it to the Hoseokās party. Sorry baby.ā Says without an ounce of regret in her voice or face. Itās Jiminās turn to blow a breath out. He isnāt surprised at all. Nor is he hurt. Itās very expected from Liya. Just tilts his head up. Asks the reason simply.
āI just have to meet Min Jae for this dinner on New Yearās Eve. Iām so sorry but itās so sudden baby. He only called me just this morning-ā
āDonāt fucking lie Liya. You are not least bit sorry, and you never wanted to join me there at Hoseokās at first place.ā Jimin scoffs. There was a time he couldnāt stand Min Jae. The damn celebrity and the heartthrob of Seoul, South Korea. Doesnāt know since when he does not care. Liya flinches at his words. Or voice.
āWatch your tone and words Park Jimin. You donāt get to talk to me like that because youāre jealous. Youāre too old to be jealous.ā Liya says sternly as she stands up.
Jealous?
āIām by no means fucking Jealous baby.ā Jimin emphasizes the word fuck yet tones down his voice. Doesnāt want to fight. Not after he did something wrong. Feels like he has no right to do so. Liya stares at his face. āGood then. Just tell them Iām really sorry I couldnāt make it.ā Takes her bag and walks to the door. Reaches the doorknob but then turns around again. āYou know what Jimin? You should at least pretend youāre disappointed. You donāt look like you care at all.ā Bites on to her bottom lip while waiting for Jiminās answer.
See, now Jimin is wrong for everything he did yet Liya makes his blood boil with her stupid antics. She wants him to beg. All the time. Wants him to be the one who gives hundred percent. He happily did so once. When he thought he would be able to do forever without getting tired but then he did. He is fucking exhausted of that. Ever since that day he finally felt tired he and Liya started to crumble.
So, he scoffs. āYou know what Liya? You should at least pretend that youāre sorry you couldnāt make it. You donāt care at all. And if you think I would beg, sorry Miss. Kim Liya, but Iām just fine by myself.ā
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āSoā¦.ā You start after staring into each otherās faces for a solid five minutes. Itās getting awkward.
āSoā¦ā Jimin repeats you. Just sitting in a desk chair while you sit on the edge of the bed. In his bedroom again. You were so worried about this day to be honest. You partially expected him to start avoiding you despite his words. But he was here when you opened your eyes. And it was you who insisted on having this conversation as the first thing. That way your own nerves will not allow you to sweep the conversation back under the rug, just after you pulled it out. So, here you are. Gaping at your faces with no words leaving your mouths.
āWe need to talk Jimin. You promised we would talk.ā You pout at him. Unintentionally again. Thereās a slight smile ghosting on Jiminās lips, but he doesnāt really smile. āWe are talking.ā He says, gesturing between you. āYou call this talking? I canāt believe you are in a five-year long relationship when this is your idea of talking.ā You say with a huff. āExactly. Thatās why it does work.ā Jimin mutters under his breath. You want to ask what he meant but that would certainly distract your subject of matter. So, you heavily sigh as you get to your feet. Approach him. He looks up at you. Itās not comfortable having this conversation while he looks at you like that. Reminds you of a time he stares at you just the same way through his lashes.
Okay stop!
āDid you talk with Liya bec-ā
āI did and she, apparently doesnāt travel anywhere Lil. She is just sleeping. She thinks she sleeps like she is dead.ā
āThat canāt be though. If Iām here and she disappeared-ā
āI know. But I already told you she canāt be waking up in a strange world since she never said a word about it. She said nothing because she isnāt going through what you are going through.ā Jimin tells as he gets to his feet finally. Towering over you. You like that. āI donāt know whatās happening but she, Liya, doesnāt go anywhere. Or even if she does, she never woken up. She is asleep all these times you are here.ā Explains further. Peers into your eyes. You do the same for a second before tearing your gaze away. This makes it worse. It makes this isnāt on Liya either. She isnāt going anywhere. She is asleep when this shift happens, and you are the only one who is awake. That means it happens while you are asleep. Not her. This is on you. Not her.
It feels hard to breathe again. āWhat do you think will happen if I fall asleep while she is still awake. Will us shift?ā You ask, suddenly. Jimin pulls his brows together. Thinks for a bit. āIām not sure. We havenāt tried that yet, have we? We can try that. I mean you can try falling asleep in middle of the day when she would be clearly awake?ā Suggests. You nod.
āYeah, thatās it. Iāll try that tomorrow.ā Say like you finally found an answer when Jimin softly sighs.
āWhatever we find Lil, will not change anything. Even if this doesnāt happen while she is awake, it will happen again one day or another. Unless of course you two decide to compromise and change your sleeping schedules.ā He says it as a joke, but you beam at him. A wide grin adorning your face. Jiminās face softens at that. Shakes his head. Does that thing he always do when he is frustrated. Searching for answers from the above. Looks at you back and about to take his hands to his face when you sprint into action. Grabbing from his both wrists and surprising you both.
āDonāt do that. It turns you into a tomato.ā You say since you already started it. A soft chuckle escapes Jiminās mouth.
āSeriously?ā Asks. You let his hands go. Say that you are serious, and he nods. Smiles. Almost like in pity. āThat thing wonāt work Lil. The sleep schedule thing. You know itās the same thing, right? Itāll not make any differenceā¦ itās not like one of you can sleep during the day or something. And I donāt think Liya will... anyway itās stupid.ā Jimin talks to you like youāre a child who lost her candy. Your smile falters at that. Of course, you know. Itās really stupid. Then youāre back at a lost.
This time itās you who search for the answers in the white ceiling. Itās you who rub your face frustratingly before you turn your back to Jimin. Let your head fall down again and throw your hands on your hips. Feel like you want to cry all of a sudden. āThen what should we do Jimin? Keep going like this? Forever? Iām oh so fucking tired. I canāt keep doing this. I just want a normal life. And I donāt know how to-ā
āHey. Hey.ā Jimin doesnāt turn you around to face him. Instead, he walks around you to face you. Gently tilt your face to his with your chin. And let go of you immediately afterwards. You pretend that doesnāt do any hurtful things to you. āWe will find answers Lil. We will. I donāt know how, but we will.ā Stares into your eyes. You do the same, let yourself get lost in his amber depths. Did he always have those eyes. Why do you feel warm. Cozy. Melting. Why do you feel like you travel into a forest at twilight. And then he smiles again, softly, making those amber depths disappear in his cheeks. You want to touch him. Cup his cheeks.
Nope. Not again!
You turn your head away from that bewitching gaze. Clear your throat. Take a step back. āSo, what are we going to do until then Park? If it take like forever to find answers, if we turn old? No, I will not live to turn old. Iāll die from the exhaustion.ā You whine. Bottom lip jutting out. Jimin chuckles. āWe will find answers before you get grey hairs and will stop this. And until thenā¦ā Now he gapes at you intensely. No sign of a laugh on his face. You watch gears shift in his head. Takes his time and then gives a single nod. āYes, until then you can at least have your normal life back.ā Clarifies. Yet, nothing is clarified in your head. āWhat normal life? Like? What do you mean Park?ā You pull your eyebrows together.
āLike you wake up in the morning and go to sleep at night, like normal people do. Unless you party hard at some nights. You are going to live a normal life even though thereās nothing normal in your life Spring Roll.ā Jimin is stern. Looks like someone with a plan.
āAre you suggesting that Iām spending a whole day here and a whole day there. Is that so?ā
āYes.ā
āHowās that gonna change anything? What about Liya? You want her to miss an entire day of her life? And what do you plan to tell her when she starts asking you about the previous day? What am I going to say to Key? She is already on my tail. I canāt miss my lectures Jimin. I canāt stay away from my job for a whole day.ā You throw your hands in the air. Jimin surely isnāt someone with a plan. His plan is way stupider than yours.
āOkay slow down.ā Jimin holds a finger in front of you to shut you up. āWell, first, we wonāt do this for long. We will find a way to stop this beforeā¦ I donāt know before uhā¦ like the spring.ā Says proudly when you gape at him in disbelief. Holds two fingers up. āOkay even before that. And second, for Liya, she didnāt remember a thing when you uh... that day at the club. You spent a day here and she was fine-ā
āYou donāt plan on telling her about me at all. Do you park? You just asked her if she is waking up in somewhere strange and when she said she doesnāt you let it at that?ā You donāt appreciate that pathway.
āNo. I didnāt, and Iāll not ask her anything Lil. Because thatās stupid. If she doesnāt know then she is good that way. No need to trouble her when she will not believe me anyway. Andā¦ trust me itās better when she doesnāt remember a whole day and think everything is fine than waking up in a middle of the day and worrying about having a some fucking sleeping disorder.ā Jimin let his hand fall down. Gaze on you. Expectant.
āOkay, so you are saying she is better sleeping a day away. Fine. Then what about me Jimin? What about my life. How-ā
āYou gonna get medical assistance.ā
āIām going to get what?ā
āYou are terribly ill that you need special consideration from your university. And your damn boss will understand that too.ā He looks smug. Proud. Really do look like someone with a plan. You are not convinced, however.
āBut thatās lying.ā You say as trying to imagine how your life will be. Youāll have to lie to everyone. āYou have a better idea Spring Roll?ā He grabs from your shoulders suddenly. āLike you said Lil. You canāt stay awake through nights. You canāt keep giving stupid excuses. So, letās give them something believable. And meanwhile letās find a way.ā Raises one of his eyebrows at you. Well, you have no other ideas let alone better ones. Maybe, just maybe this will work. But then itās not like you can go and tell people you are sick and need special consideration. Expect them to rely on your verbal explanations.
āWell, I need proof to prove Iām sick Park.ā
āLeave that to me. Just give me the details I want.ā He grins. Let you go. Youāre still not hundred percent convinced. Feel skeptical. Yet are willing to see what will happen. So, you nod. Sigh.
āYeah. Letās do this. Itās already fucked up anyway.ā
He nods too. You both nod in unison. One problem is talked through. No answers but there is a plan, that might work. Or not. In that case, thereās only one thing is left to talk through. And for you, that is the scariest part. Makes your legs weak even before you start it. If the way Jimin gulps harsh is anything, you know he feels the same way. Still, youāll have to talk this one too. Especially, since youāll spend days here from now on.
āUm... well, then about what happened the other dayā¦ I... uh...ā You are the one who start it first. Jimin encourages you to keep going with a slight nod and his furrowed brows. āI... I mean... itās like Iām sexually dep-ā
āSexually deprived.ā Jimin finishes for you. You suck in a deep breath. Fall into a deafening silence. Have no idea whether he completed your sentence or said it to you.
āI was sexually deprived Lil. I donāt remember when I last fucked.ā He then lets you know that he indeed did the latter. You are about to ask how, when he gives the answer for that one as well. āYes, I have a girlfriend but we both are so fucking busy. It just happened Lil but-ā
āBut it wonāt happen again.ā You complete it for him this time.
āExactly. And itās not happened because you look like her because, uhā¦ I donāt know, youāre not. And it has everything to do with me being horny as fuck.ā He is not looking at you. Just staring at the bed. As if this is the first time, he sees it. āAnd itās so fucking wrong. Iāll resolve my problems, and I donāt want to think that I used you or something.ā Gets done with bed and looks at you instead. āUgh... this is so frustrating.ā Finally rubs his face. You donāt stop him this time. āI fucking crossed a line Lil. Iām really sorry and it will not happen again.ā Finishes. Now itās your time.
You feel at a loss, however. Feel disappointed. Ridiculous considering you expected this. This is how it should be. Still, thereās a pang in your heart. A tangled ache. A piercing confusion. You force yourself to smile. Pretend that youāre fine. āYeah, I get it. And it wasnāt completely on you Jimin. I said yes and like you, Iām sexually deprived too. And unlike you I donāt have a fucking boyfriend either.ā You finally manage to say while blowing out a breath. This is fine. āSoā¦ that happened because, both of us were horny. Like extremely horny. Thatās it and Iāll resolve my problems as well.ā You agree. Not with the bottom of your heart. Something feel wrong. Extremely. Yet you continue anyway.
āIām sorry too Park.ā Chuckle very awkwardly. Wave your hand in front of you. Youāre not looking at him either. āBut like are we good though?ā Take a sneaky glance at him. Catch the way he bob his head violently. āOf course, we are.ā Affirms and gives you an awkward chuckle of his own.
āGreat!ā You keep forcing yourself to smile.
āGreat...ā He echoes.
āUm... then are we like friends?ā You ask without thinking. What a stupid question. He thinks so too, apparently. Gapes at you. āFriends?ā Inquires tentatively. You just keep peering at his adorable face. Leaves him to do nothing but answer your question.
āYes. Yeah, fuck. Friends. We can be friends likeā¦ uh... yeah friends Lil. We are friends.ā Concludes at last. Takes you by surprise when he is stretching his hand for you to shake.
Oh! It apparently aches.
It was your idea anyway. You take his hand. Shake.
āFriends it is. And we will not do anything that crosses the line again.ā You seal the deal.
āWe wonāt.ā Jimin squeezes your hand. Keeps it in his hold more than necessary and finally let go. And youāre certain this is the most disappointed youāve ever been.
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āLiya wmph be there aā New Yearās Ee?ā Taehyung asks through his mouthful of kimbap. Jimin peers at him over the printed report heās been looking at while eating his lunch. āLiya what?ā Jimin frowns at his friend.
āYah! Donāt talk with your mouth full, moron.ā Jin clicks his tongue at Taehyung. Taehyung sighs but swallows down his food before repeating what he said earlier.
āLiya wonāt be there at New Yearās Eve? Seoyeon told me.ā Even gives further explanation, though nobody asks.
āOh, she wonāt?ā Hoseok perks up too, expectantly looking at Jimin. Jimin hates this. Just shrugs.
āYeah, some dinner plans or something.ā Says as nonchalantly as he can.
āWith who? Youāll be there though, right?ā Hoseok asks again at the moment Jimin is about go back to minding his own business. āOf course, I will. Why wouldnāt I Hobi?ā Jimin gives him a tight-lipped smile, praying he would stop asking questions. He doesnāt, but Taehyung does.
āLiya was really weird that day. Is she okay? Like was her tummy actually hurting that day? Is that why she acted like that?ā Taehyung blinks at Jimin. Jimin blinks at Taehyung. Jin butts in to save him. āWhy would someone act so cheery when their stomach hurts? Thatās fucking stupid Tae.ā He says while searching for a paper serviette. Jimin almost nods in assent when Jin speaks again. āBut she was weird. I mean not that I know her very well...ā He doesnāt get to complete whatever he is saying when Hoseok snorts.
āSorry.ā He mumbles fast. Then point his chopsticks at Jimin. āBut Hyung is right. Fuck dude. You and she have been together for five fucking years, and we knew each other all that time but she is a fucking mystery, you know. I mean no offense...ā Looks carefully at Jimin.
āNone taken.ā Jimin finally gives up trying to review this stupid report and places it back on the table. Hoseok carries on happily. āYeah, but I mean I was so surprised she joined us in a club? And then acted like she likes us so much?ā He raises his eyebrows and tilts his face. Jin after all didnāt butt in to save him.
āRight? Exactly my point.ā Taehyung agrees very enthusiastically for Jiminās displeasure. āShe even danced with that guy. What was his name Hobba? Your friendās friend? With tats and eyebrow piercing?ā He looks at Hoseok while pointing at his own eyebrow. Jimin feels the same unpleasant twist in his guts at the memory.
āWho Jungkook?ā Hoseok asks back when Taehyung snaps his fingers, grinning. āYeah. Jung Kook. She danced with him dude.ā They all are looking at Jimin now. He doesnāt know what to say. Jin again butts in and definitely isnāt saving him.
āAnd then these two almost fucked in the dance floor. Liya? And Park fucking Jimin? I have never seen her somewhat like kiss you in the public Jimin. Was she possessed that day?ā Jin finally has found the serviette he was looking for. Jimin sighs. Hardly. Thereās a headache forming. āShe was just fine, guys. Was in a good mood. Thatās it.ā Says wearily. He really wants his friends to drop this conversation.
āYeah? So, she is back to her sour mood again. Back to dislike us again. To think that we are all bad influence on the-best-future- CEO- Jimin.ā Hoseok says with an edge to his voice. Makes Jimin really uncomfortable. Itās true in a kind of way but not completely. Liya doesnāt think that way, just doesnāt like hanging out with them and thatās her choice. Still, Jimin feels the urge to defend. Defend who, he has no idea. Maybe himself. āShe doesnāt think that way and she... I mean has no problem with you.ā Says and stuffs his mouth with food.
āI think thatās the same thing. I mean we donāt care, itās your personal life, but she really doesn't like us, Jiminie. Thatās why she wonāt come to the party as well.ā Hoseok scoffs. That discomfort Jimin felt is turning into anger now. āReally Hobi? You said you donāt care but you certainly act like you do.ā He puts the chopsticks down. Hoseok does the same. āI donāt. Iām just saying Jimin. No need to get so riled up. If youāre happy then we are happy. The question is, Are you happy?ā Smiles at Jimin but it feels like a smile of pity.
āYeah, yeah, happy boss happy life.ā Taehyung quickly disrupts. Picks a kimbap and brings that to Hoseokās mouth. He gives Taehyung a very judgmental look but eats it anyway. Makes Jimin sigh. He loves his friends. āIām not your boss you fuckers! We are co- fucking owners. And I really donāt want you to think that way. I am happy, guys. I mean cāmon itās just a party and who cares if she canāt make it.ā Tries to laugh but fails.
āYou should care.ā Jin says noncommittally. Doesnāt even look at anyone. But everyone looks at him. āThatās your girlfriend of five years. We are your friends, and we donāt want to suddenly sit back to talk about walking in different paths with whatever we made till now, just because she hates us. Maybe you should care, Jiminie.ā Finally looks at Jimin. Jimin feels a weird sensation his stomach. This is not the first time his friends brought something up like this. Not that they always do but sometimes they just let Jimin knows that he isnāt happy. Fuck them!
āOkay fuck. She will come. Since you all think itās a huge deal that she canāt come, and it defines our relationship. Let me prove it.ā Jimin blurts that out. Looks at everyone. Ignores the way all three of them saying he doesnāt have to prove anything to them.
āShe will come guys. Hobi, count her in.ā
Fuck, why did he say that. How old is he to play silly games. How on earth is he going to make Liya agrees to come.
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Jimin stares out of his floor-to-ceiling office window. Sulking. Regretting his life decisions.
āFuck!ā Mutters to himself and sighs. Why did he say Liya would come? Why did he make a big deal out of it. Maybe he can just let it go. His friends wonāt make it a huge deal if he joins them alone. They wouldnāt now, would they? Jimin groans loudly. Looks up. About to rub his face furiously when the tomato pops up in his head. Canāt help but chuckle. You are always so weirdly interesting.
He needs to block you out of his mind. Think about the problems he has instead of thinking about you. Itās very unintentional, however. Youāll pop up on his mind at most random times. Like now. Jimin puts his hands back. Refrains from making himself looking like a tomato. Wonders if you try sleeping in the day. See, canāt help it. Groans again. Starts pacing around only to stop dead in the track. You feel nauseous when he does that.
Wait what? What the actual fuck? You again?
This might look really ridiculous how he just stands in middle of his office. Mouth agape. Whatās wrong with him? He needs to find a way to get Liya abandon her dinner and join him. Or if it doesnāt work, he will have to find another plan. He just needs to bring his girlfriend to that stupid party. So, his friends will not think his relationship is crumbling. He shouldnāt care. Itās stupid to try to worry about a fake healthy appearance of a relationship. But apparently, he does. And he needs to find a way. Needs to stop thinking about what you like and not.
He looks at the place that gives him answers all the time- the fucking ceiling. He always finds answers there.
A way to bring his girlfriend to the stupid party. Or find another way. Another way.
Wait. Another way? He has another way.
A huge grin breaks out on his face. Of course. Liya will never change her plans for him. He wonāt either. But since he still needs to pretend, all he has to do is bring his girlfriend. Or someone who looks like his girlfriend. There he goes. He lets out a victorious noise. Heās going to ask you. You will agree. Because of course you will.
Besides, you two are friends now. Jimin thinks thatās extremely stupid. Your idea anyway. So, he will make the best of being friends with you. Even though something doesnāt sit right with him when he thinks you are friends now. Thereās a disappointment in his heart. An ache. Still, this is the right thing and right way. He gives himself a few nods. He will ask you to help your friend. Thatās what friends do. This strange ache and longing will go away. And when it does, he will have a good friend.
A friend from a star.
A friend who looks exactly like his girlfriend.
A friend who sounds so sweet when she comes.
A friend who has most beautiful fucking tits.
Still, friends. You said you are now friends. Fucking friends.
F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
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Chapter index
Taglist- @chimmy-licious @smoljimjim @graydolan12
#bts#bts angst#bts smut#bts au#bts fantasy au#bts fluff#bts imagines#bts jimin#park jimin#kim namjoon#jimin#jimin smut#jimin fanfic#jimin scenarios#jimin fluff#jimin fic#jiminie#jimin Ć reader#jimin angst#kim taehyung#kim seokjin#jung hoseok#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts series#smut bts#IAU
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Loser HCs for the Side Order Bosses (Excluding Final Boss)
LET'S GOOO FINALLY DOING THIS FOR MY GOOBERS! (oh, and also Parallel Canon too.) - [SPOILERS! HEADS UP THERE!] - ======================================= Asynchronous Rondo (Rondo / Roro), The Layered Rotator (She/They) "Rondo's probably the quiet one of the crew, usually just humming her small corrupted tunes to herself while in her area and rarely even chats with anyone (in fact, communication is hard for Rondo!). But aside from being the quiet one, she's also the one making sure the others are aligned and one of the sternest of the few (aside from Order) along with being the most intelligent despite her lack of communication skills. None can escape her sight... she's very much eagle-eyed and will know when you're causing a muck. Although aside from that hubbub, she's actually a relatively nice soul as long as you aren't Eight or anyone that they know. She's actually very good with taking care of the Jelletons that lie within her area, who love the corrupted song that she sings. As long as you aren't a threat to her or to the Jelletons... then you can hang around!... just be vigilant of your actions." ======================================== Pinging Marciale (Marci / MarMar), The Elusive Bounder (They/Them) "Marciale's the chaos-maker and the fun one of the crew, rolling around and causing all sorts of mess (even squishing a few of the loc. Not the face of order at all!... Unfortunately, because of such behavior, they're kept on a pretty short leash with good ol' Order and they HATE that, being in their area and sitting around is so boring! At least let them have fun! Usually whenever they get too bored, they sleep it off... but when they have a lot of energy?... different story. Usually, they can hold it off while playing with the Battering Lentos... but even then, it's easy for them to get bored! They absolutely love screwing with Eight and loves trying to turn them into a piece of "p-eight-per" (paper? get it? alri, I'll stop there š„). Even if they lose almost all the time, they have fun with it! But with Order constantly hovering over their non-existant shoulders?... yeah it's gonna be hard to even get a small kick out of what they're supposed to be doing... But don't worry! Marciale will do their best to just have fun with things no matter how boring!" ======================================== Parallel Canon (Any Name / Para [Leader]), The Intensifying Harmony (Any) "This group of Artificial Inklings aren't really that emotional... but they're also a wreck waiting to happen. They're usually seen training with each other to see who's the strongest out of them (usually it's the damned roller), having the Jelletons watch on in awe as they spectacularly duke it out for bragging rights! Although they try their best to improve their strategies, they still come up a bit short with Eight. Their Leader (Shooter), Para, is usually the one who plots out who goes where during their fights. But either way... they seemed to be highly fascinated with Eight and how they battle, seeking to try and mimic their abilities and how they fight with the others following suit. Although no matter how much they learn, train, and fight... they still come up short... considering Eight a true rival... Para is determined to get at least one win in against the octoling... although knowing how advanced their skills are, it will be a difficult task... a task that Para and Co. will try!... but Para just can't shake the feeling that there's something... familiar about Eight... almost as if they've met once before in a distant past..." ======================================== And those are my main lil' doodads for the main bosses for Side Order (minus the big cheese themselves), hopefully y'all like them and that's it! I'mma head on over to my hole again, byeee! c:
#verrin blabs#splatoon 3#asynchronous rondo#pinging marciale#parallel canon#side order#side order spoilers#splatoon#splat3#rinster got that fixation going#what are they gonna do
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stray my stand in thoughts in no particular order (e1-7 spoilers) ~
sorry it's long lmao I have a lot of jumbled thoughts that I need to yell about so this is me screaming into the void
Joe being used as a stand in by ming and tong is very telling
ming honestly doesn't act like a spoiled rich brat. he's occasionally entitled, but he's very polite to staff and he genuinely cares for his sister.
I don't think that ming wants to hurt his sister. he wants tong to choose him instead of his sister so that he can break her heart instead and then ming isn't to blame
idk if ming was ever trying to be subtle to Joe about what he was to him. he flat out told him he was a stand in (just didn't mention for who)
Joe getting a second chance at a maternity figure only to have her immediately fall into major trouble and then health issues has got to be triggering the fuck out of Joe rn
do we find out where Joe 2.0's spirit is at all? and what happened to OG Joe's body??
jfc poom is so pretty I can't focus
ik sol and ming are more than likely gonna become friends at some point but my messy ass would LOVE to see them be bitter bitches to the end with each other
where did ming get the chain....?
it's making me so fucking sad that Joe is falling back into his previous direct footsteps bc of his situation and its literally all he knows to do. same people, same habits, same mannerisms, same career, everything
he has an opportunity to completely rebrand and live his life without being under ming's thumb but he is consciously choosing to stay around him. why? what is so alluring about the person who used and emotionally cheated on you for who knows how long and then drunkenly called you the target of his actual affections????
Joe is not only too humble. I think he genuinely doesn't think he deserves better. this life is all he's ever known and he's never had the stones to try and improve himself and get his own life
his job is literally to be a nameless, faceless body double who does the work for a person who gets to take all the credit
(not that I'm shit talking real stunt doubles. y'all are the core of my fave action movies and ily)
but it says a lot about Joe's character and how passive he is usually and it's so interesting to me that he's the big risk taker when it comes to his stunts but he's too scared to make a move to improve his life or branch out on his own
those inconsiderate little bitches. you can't just add a character willy nilly to an already finished script. it'll throw off the whole movie and that's way more work for the writers
yo that hesitation at Joe not being able to break those mugs???? I felt it physically that was GOOD FUCKING ACTING
sol has never done anything wrong in his life he could murder someone in front of me in cold blood and I would help him cover it up
I would come out to sol i trust him with my party drink I'll go to war for him
damn bro how the hell did Joe get roped into being a stand in for HIMSELF that's some meta shit right there. like how is this not just self harm bc that's what it seems like to me
tharn? that's a new name. will we meet him?
ming's condo being green and gold like Joe's old house I am chewing on fucking concrete
OH THE MIRROR SWIPE THE HARSH REMINDER THAT HE IS IN ANOTHER BODY AND THAT HE IS USING THAT BODY AS A STAND IN FOR HIMSELF AND THAT HE NOT ONLY SOLD HIMSELF TO MING BUT HE SOLD JOE 2.0'S BODY GOD THAT WAS *chefs kiss*
is the backception here that ming is kissing Joe 2.0's back bc it reminds him of OG Joe or because it reminds him of Joe reminding him of tong hmmmmmmmmm either way: seek help babe you have a problem
the juicy juicy parallel of ming waking up to an empty pillow I'm gulping this shit down like water this is my life blood rn thank you for the delicious meal
i am not immune to the mesh shirt
AHA I THINK I JUST MET THARN
Update: I am correct
JOE'S ACCIDENT WAS A SUICIDE ATTEMPT?!?!?!?!? holy fuck bro
I thought I was going to hate ming a lot more when I started this bc I have a lot of manipulation trauma but I kind of.... get him
how old is tharn supposed to be bc he looks 16 and it's unsettling
I knew we couldn't trust that twink
YAS BABE YOU LOSE YOUR SHIT YOU YELL YOU GET MAD YOU TELL PEOPLE TO FUCK OFF YOU KICK THARN OUT OF YOUR ROOM DESERVE TO UNHINGE YOURSELF A BIT
ming is about to step off the edge I can feel it this man is about to overflow and drown everyone around him in his search for Joe
"tOng PlaYed tHe scENe hImsELF" oh so tong has always been a piece of shit got it
shut the fuck up why am I actually getting emotional over ming realizing that his Joe is the one in front of him and that it's been him all along
but on another note I am going to pound him into the cement for interrupting that shoot I hope the footage wasn't ruined by ming's emo ass
the back hug with the clear JOE though and comparing it to their first meeting?? stupendous no notes
up is going in a bubble I am kissing his forehead he acted the fuck outta that last scene MWAH
#my stand in#my stand in the series#ming x joe#joe x ming#up poompat#poom phuripan#sorry i had many things to say and no one else to yell to so on the public internet it is lmao
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"If my only purpose in life is to love a woman as great as you, I will be a very fulfilled man indeed."
Babe. BABE! You cannot drop that line and NOT expect me to burst into tears.
Readmore of Sarah's live takes on the newest Bridgerton season:
Bisexual Benedict Bridgerton supremecy. No seriously, BISEXUAL BENEDICT BRIDGERTON!!!!!!!!! I nearly screamed, y'all
Phillipa Featherington Finch is the most adorable woman on the planet, I will die on that hill, I love her, your honor.
Ngl, I really feel for Cressida. I was really hoping for a Lady Danbury/Cressida runaway parallel, but alas. Also WHAT was with the Mrs. Cowper BEEF with the Bridgertons, damn??? Also Also: what happened to the nature lord from pt1 of the season? Surely he wouldve shifted his attention back to Cressida right?? But no, poof. He gone
The women this season SO FUCKING PRETTY, I CANNOT HANDLE THIS ASFLSKSH KATE, HELLO??? PEN?? ELOISE??? ALICE??? SHOW ME A WOMAN IN THIS SHOW I WOULDN'T SWOON FOR, STARS HAVE MERCY.
Colin needs more color in his wardrobe in the last few episodes, dangnabbit. Blacks and browns are all well and good, but he deserves to slay during his season, especially during the climax ball!!! Give him a colored shirt, a pattered vest, SOMETHING! Also: Show me more FOB Pirate Colin please and thank you
Alice, you go queen! Slide right into society and have them all chasing YOU to come to their brunches. Hell yeah. I just KNOW Danbury is setting the Mondritch's up to slide into her place as the rule breakers/trendsetters of society events
Pen's breasts are spilling out of every dress she wears. Im not saying that's a PROBLEM, I'm just saying as a fellow perfect breasted woman, I know from experience that her dresses are too small around the bust for her body. Theyre not custom made, they were ordered, then tailored to fit her - but wardrobe didn't account for the extra give around the chest, so the dresses are squeezing as tightly across as possible, it CANNOT be comfortable. Very common problem for us short curvatious women. Sexy as hell though, 11/10 very distracting
That settee sex scene?!? The mirror??? The strip tease?!?!? Please have mercy, I'm only human
Francesca and John are so FUCKING ADORABLE I cant help but squeal every time they're together. I too want to go off with a sweet adorable husband to go live in a gorgeous castle in Scotland
Eloise is so pretty, but I just gotta say it, I HATE her wardrobe. It looks neither comfortable, nor very pretty, nor very flattering. Are they purposefully trying to make her look youger to stave off her romance/season? It's the only explanation I can come up with for those atrocious bows at the necklines
Now FRANCESCA'S wardrobe does a PHENOMENAL job of both being very pretty and nailing her characterization compared to the women around her. I LOVE the accented, high necklines.
I loved the inky hands, cool detail to pull out
And just to loop back around once again, BISEXUAL BENEDICT BRIDGERTON!!!!
I audibly said "OH SHIT" when Pen turned away from the print shop to find Colin. 'Whoop, there it is'
Ben's affirmation to Eloise about love not being finite, and the implication that just because Pen and Colin love each other, it doesn't cheapen the relationship El has with each of them individually really got to me man. I cried.
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MORTAL KOMBAT 1 Thoughts Pt2.
[āācontains SPOILERSāā]
Continuation from yesterday
Chapter 6
They keep switching between Bromance and Romance for Kenshi and Johnny. Which one is it now???
I adore Johnny being protective of Kenshi, and Kenshi holding onto him while walking.
The way reptile switched from human to lizard, makes it look like he is not actually shape shifting, merely casting an Illusion to seem human.
Nitara is hot and all, love the design, but....who thought it was a great idea to have Megan Fox voice her? No shade but the voice acting is pretty awful.
Kenshi trying to run in with Sento but is pushed back in a comedical way by Ermac SENT ME. I felt so bad but I couldn't stop laughing.
Sento activating in this fight was pretty cool, I will not lie.
Not Jerrod shouting out for Sindelšš
Chapter 7
I wonder why Liu Kang didn't get fully rid of Krusty Kronika. Just because he is playing god now doesn't mean she's any harmless. But also wasn't Kronika fully destroyed?
Lesbians
Johnny and Kung Lao trying to knock out Quan Chi in the middle of the street while dressed up in those carneval suits was a sight for sore eyes.
NOT THE SIDE KICK PREDICTIONS WITH REPTILE AND KENSHI LITERALLY FLYING IN PLSSS
This entire chapter is full of comedic bits, and I'm here for it. We need more stuff like this.
Chapter 8
I like the implication that some things are inevitable, no matter how you think you shaped things differently.
I enjoy Geras and Liu Kang s friendship a lot.
So Liu didn't intend for Kronika to be alive in this timeline after all.
"Father" Is smoke now Bi-Han and Kuais brother??Was he adopted adopted??
Aight but am I the only one who thinks Smoke looks like Elon Musk? Like, for real,, it's freaking me out.
I know Smoke is voiced by Yuri Lowenthal but I keep hearing Troy Baker.
That manipulative parallel from when Shang Tsung was a Merchant still was very clever
Chapter 9
Okay crazy theory, but what if Kronika isn't Kronika, but Alt Shang Tsung in disguise???
Why am I not surprised by the betrayal. Still having hopes that Bi-Han is just bluffing to save Kuai.
Kuai being out for blood is really entertaining. That melting sword scene was so damn cool too.
Scorpion being affected and literally burned by heat somehow doesn't make sense to me. Especially with Subzero seemingly not being harmed by frost and ice. Also Havik recovered from that melt off really fcking fast. Bowing down to you, king.
Bi-Han literally showing up from behind the cold wind was such an amazing entrance. I was even jumpscared a little.
5bucks that new course is the Shirai Ryu
Chapter 10
If the second timeline the ending to aftermath where Shang Tsung won?? If so, that is the coolest decision NRS has ever made so far.
Li Mei is so pretty. I adore her so much.
Have y'all noticed how weird the run animation in this game is. It's so awkward and looks half-assed.
Mileena is such a good fighter but I hate how much she is being babied. I know it's because of Tarkat, but it's kinda silly.
Lesbians
I am very amazed with the character design improvement in this game. I thought MK11 was already damn pretty, but MK1 really put the icing on top. There are so many fine details in the environment and outfits, I am eating this up like desert.
Will hopefully finish the rest of the game tomorrow though! Last and Final thoughts coming in soon!
#mortal kombat 1#mortal kombat#mk1#mk#li mei#liu kang#johnny cage#kung lao#kenshi takahashi#reptile#syzoth#bi han#kuai liang#sub zero#scorpion#smoke#mileena#kitana#sindel#shang tsung#nitara#ermac#quan chi#tanya#funny thoughts#my thoughts
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I keep forgetting how annoying it is to watch a currently airing show with a large fanbase on tumblr. Stop tagging the ship name with silly complaints that make no sense. How is that fun for anyone who just wants to browse the tag in peace?
"Ugh Luke saying they're acting like a married couple is fanservice." A child? Saying a variation of 'Annabeth and Percy kissing in a tree, k i s s i n g' lmao please be serious. THEY ARE KIDS, teasing each other. Were y'all never teased when you hung out with another kid and your friends noticed y'all were looking a little too friendly? Oh brother.
"They're pushing Grover to the side in favor or percabeth :(" Huh? Did you read the books? Grover (i love) barely does much. If anything the show is giving him way more to do and say. The actor who plays Grover I genuinely think is the best actor out of the three, he's doing a very good job. Any Pan mention, the moment he found Ferdinand, all great scenes.
"It's not a slow burn! They're already too flirty." Once again, children. They have only hugged and even though I'm a lunatic that is reading into everything because I love percabeth... Not a damn thing came out of that hug lmao there was no nervousness, no 'how do I act around her/him now that I've hugged him oh no' type feelings. She was happy he was ALIVE. Simple.
Also the actual actors are finding their footings with each other as each episodes go by so there's a naturally progression happening both on and off screen. The actors also have said again and again they read all the books so they know their characters are endgame and probably are playing into that a bit. Maybe they don't even realize they're doing it because they were TWELVE at time of filming.
I wonder why so many people are so bothered by show-percabeth especially if they're fans of the books. This couple is the IT couple. They are hyped. Their story, what they do and go through for each other is legendary lmao so what exactly is the real issue? Do you not want parallels to happen? Seeds planted, sOME smiling??? Do you not want Annabeths found family brother who witnessed her shove Percy into the ocean just not mention he notices they seem to have gotten closer?
Very peculiar...
#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#percabeth#i have never understood the concept of tagging the ship you're not giving actual critique about but rather plain annoyance#whenever i had antis back when i had the time lmao i would tag anti ship name and tag the show name too#i tagged the show name if i was looking for actual discussion like am i seeing this wrong#but just straight up HATING? I only tagged anti#why tf would i want to interrupt other peoples happy scrolls with my nonsense?#im too grown for this haha so i am not replying to anyone with any rebuttals i am just asking yall to get out the tag#the examples i used above are not constructive#people are in the percabeth tag saying 'FANSERVICE that they smiled at each other already in ep 3*angry face*#'too much percabeth *rolling eye emoji*#okay and that's your opinion but just#get out the damn tag lmao omgg#not in 2024 do yall not know how to tag correctly
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Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?
Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "stormblessed95 "?
I'm stormblessed because of this Ultra badass super sad boy right here.... Kaladin Stormblessed has my entire fucking heart for the rest of my life
Art by Ro
95 for vmin š„°
Some of my favorite fics! In no particular order:
Blame it on my Youth by youreyestheyglow
Paring: Andrew/Neil
Fandom: AFTG
10 years after the end of The King's Men, Andrew and Neil have decided to foster a kid. They have low expectations for themselves--they're not exactly ideal parenting material--but at the very least, the kid will be safe with them. But neither Andrew nor Neil do temporary very well.
Full disclosure: highly character-driven, minimally plot-driven.
TW: If you suffer from paranoia, this is probably not the fic for you. Specifically, Neil has bunches of paranoia regarding being watched, and also being murdered.
Locked fic, so you need an account. Words:Ā 1,520,605 and a WIP too.... Lmao I know....but it's SO GOOD. I'm just.... It's so damn good y'all. Basically just andriel growing and healing together, being so deeply in love, their adult lives and becoming parents and helping those children heal from their traumas too. Just gorgeously beautiful and I love it.
That Isn't Nothing by Taekookschanbaek
Pairing: Andrew/Neil
Fandom: AFTG
A look into the lives of pro exy players Andrew Minyard and Neil Josten. The world says they hate each other, but when Andrew gets transferred to Neil's team, their teammates begin seeing something else between them.
Words: 38,362, don't be thrown by the author name. I KNOW okay. But like damn, the fic is so fucking good. Ive read it multiple times. Its solid story telling with outsider POV and I just eat it up! Protective boyfriends and secret relationships and soft for each other moments. It's so good
The One-Body ProblemĀ byĀ metisket
Pairing: Lan Zhan/Wei Ying
Fandom: MDZS
The good news is that Lan Jingyi has found a mentor, friend, and constant companion through the difficulties in life. The bad news is that thatās because heās been accidentally possessed by the Yiling Patriarch.
This fic is SO GOOD I keep coming back to it all the time. It's got the juniors dynamics, it's got the most wholesome bonding stuff, it's got Jingyi being himself and so loveable. So wholesome. So cute. 10 outta 10 fic honestly. Words: 28,689
Rotten Work by @shanastoryteller
Pairing: Lan Zhan/Wei Ying
Fandom: MDZS
Jin Ling hadnāt thought to keep track of Wei Wuxian. Clearly that had been a mistake.
so good. Just amazing uncle and nephew bonding that gives me literally ALL OF THE FEELS. I read this and then went and read everything else this author has written. Such good storytelling!! And this was just both wholesome and emotional and fun! Amazing fic, truly. Words: 63,907
Stunted, Starving Juvenility by @tomatenmark5
Pairing: Lan Zhan/Wei Ying
Fandom: MDZS
At sixteen Wei Wuxian isāthrough some strange twist of fate, or a nick in the layer between parallel universes, who knowsāout of the blue confronted withĀ thatĀ one incense burner dream one night.
While his curious mind is left unable to stop poking at this new perspective on Lan Wangji, circumstances in the Cloud Recesses begin to change and Wei Wuxian is suddenly presented with life-altering opportunities.
Maybe Gusu isnāt so bad after all?
(Or alternatively: The fic where I get to give Wei Wuxian the academic scholarship he deserves while simultaneously getting him hitched early on.)
Might just be one of my all time favorite fics/stories. It's still technically a WIP but it's soo good. Don't let that stop you. It's so long too. But that's just even more story to love. I can't say enough good things lol words: 742,856 (I know, don't be intimidated though! Lol)
And Time is But a Paper Moon by Sami
Pairing: Lan Zhan/Wei Ying
Fandom: MDZS
"Zewu-Jun. You once told me about a house surrounded by gentians, where you visited once a month, and how Lan Zhan still waited there, even when the door no longer opened."
Xichen feels light-headed. He feels shocked, and angry. He has never told anyone such a thing, but Lan Zhan is giving Xichen a look of utter betrayal.
"You told him?" Lan Zhan whispers. "When?"
Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand. "About twenty years from now."
***
Wei Wuxian starts again from the beginning.
My favorite time travel fix it fic. It's genuinely SO GOOD I love it and I love all the sequel stories that come after it!! Words: 139,032
The File by Denimbeans
Pairing: Percy Jackson/Bucky Barnes
Fandom: PJO, Marvel
When Percy stepped out of the elevator, Hazel wanted to weep. His clothing was tattered, hair matted with blood, and he was covered head to toe in golden dust. But he was alive. It took her a few minutes to realize that he was alone.
Before she died, she'd heard reports on the radio about soldiers who came home. Shellshock, they called it, from being in the trenches, the bombs and the bullets and the dead. Hazel had met soldier, once. A man who'd come home to her little town, missing half his leg and most of his mind. The look in his eyes was hauntingly similar to what she saw on her cousin's face.
Percy was different now. Stronger, maybe. He'd made it through Hell, but not without leaving a piece of him behind.
I honestly didn't know if I'd like this one when I started lol but I loved it. The ANGST WAS SO HEAVY AND SO GOOD. tw for annabeth not making it out of tarturus alive in this fic. PJO and Marvel/Shield mash up and honestly I'm just so down for badass Percy fics. Especially when we see him from another POV where he looks so scary but in his head he is the softest most traumatized boy. Percy is everything to me. Lol and I ship percabeth so hard so this was an outlier fic to me š the blurb there is from the first story, I linked the whole series.
The One Where Nico Has 30 Boyfriends by a_million_stars
Pairing: Nico/Will
Fandom: PJO
āSeriously? Me and Lester?ā Nico looked ready to kill him. āIf you keep speaking to me I think Iām going to throw up.ā
Or, a new friend from college desperately tries to figure out who Nico's secret boyfriend is. He messes up. A lot. If only Nico didn't have so many weirdly close friends from high school.
Just wholesome adorable cuteness with some outsider POV, which y'all should be able to tell I LOVE by now
Mortals, Meet Demigods by MaryaDmitrievnaLikesSundays
Pairing: Annabeth/Percy, Nico/Will
Fandom: PJO
Life isnāt easy for any teenager, but when youāre half-god, the word āeasyā loses all meaning. Nine different mortals start to understand that.
Just cute wholesome outsider POV into the most precious of characters
Like Everything Glows by Annie_vi
Pairing: Jimin/Jungkook
Fandom: BTS
Jeon Jeongguk watches the sun rise and set on the water every day without wondering what may lie far beneath the surface. One nighttime walk along the beach upheaves his entire life, sending his human morals into a tailspin as he questions what his beliefs really are.
The first fic I read by Annie and still my favorite. I think about this story all the time lol. She is one of the very very few people I will read RPS fics from because her storytelling is just so immaculately beautiful. I love the way she writes. Truly. I need her to get published one day
@skygemspeaks retirement AU thread and every single fic it sparked inspiratiom for.
Seriously they linked TONS of them under their post and I read and obsessed over every single one and then went looking for more. Lmfao
Pairing: Yuuri/Victor
Fandom: Yuuri on Ice
Link to their Tumblr post:
Wrapping it up with @pekgna illustrated coffee shop AU that I'm so obsessed with.
Pairing: Shallan/Adolin/Kaladin
Fandom: Stormlight Archive
OT3 when Shallan and Adolin seduce Kaladin, their barista into becoming their boyfriend lol just perfection and adorable and the art is amazing!
Link to the start of the AU on Tumblr here:
Enjoy if you read them, let me know if you like them!!! And always feel free to give me fic recs as well especially if you want to send them to my side blog where I try to keep most of my conversations about books and fics now. My anon asks are on there. I've reblogged a few over there too. @moonofthesurvivor
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š¶ itsssss beeennnn š¶ a hotttt minuuutteeee š¶ sincccee iveeee went insane on here so let's just get into it yeah
Yall already know what it is
jia + the archer x not strong enough
When the trend first like got popular I was like eeehhhh that's not rlly jia
Haha lol
the archer:
'screaming who could ever leave me darling, but who could stay'
the spiderman curse
Or smth idk HAUSHA the canon events and everyone dyinnnggg
And also her own personal life like her parents didn't even stay soooo
Who would (COUGHCOUGHXOUGHOBJEHUHC)
And while jia isn't like uhhh how do I put it
She's not insecure yet she's also deeply insecure at a more ??? deeper level??? Idk how to say it
Like it's more like "I hate the way I have become because of things I cannot control and the way it makes me FFFFUUCCKING LONELLLYYYY"
but in a sadder way HAHSJS idk she copes by ignoring her problems (js like me fr)
So while at the same time she's like yeah I'm just a person I'm good with it š she's also like what, could anyone possibly see in me to stay (side affects of distant parents!!!! Side note: THISNISNT TRAUMA DUMPING IM FINE)
'cause they see right through me'
They as in all the people she's known and don't know
That doesn't make sense gimme a
Like they as in the people of her city, people within the hq probably, people shes acquainted with, friends with, etc etc etc
They as in all people other jia herself sees right through her and fail to see just *her* per se
And it's probably her own fault tbh I mean she kinda like
Masks it so who's damn fault is that girl š¤·š¤· DAMN
But despite them never truly seeing the her that's incredibly lonely, she'd much rather prefer to keep it that way which then rolls onto the topiccc offffff
'can you see right through me'
okay this is kind of personal interpretation and changing the lyrical meaning to fit her lore BUT IDDDCCCCC IM RUNNING THIS SHOOOWWW LET ME BEEEEE
Y'all already know who this is directed at hirjejkejejkejekejejejjejejejks
hob
HEHIIEHHRBBBBDBBBB
Anyways
Like the last one I said she'd much prefer to keep her self under wraps and ignore the problem
But obviously since I'm FUCKING delusional and SOOOO fucking CRIMGEE ofc he's an exception HHHHHRHBBBHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRB&-!-!
And because he's the only one who's ever really gotten underneath that layer
She was
Sooooioioioooooo
Fucking confused by it
And because she's never addressed her issues properly, she's not used to this and so this line would almost be like
She's BEGGING him to just pllleaaase be like the rest
Please just see through her because this kind of thing has never happened before and she's SCCCCARREEDD to care too much and what if he leaves too and what if it's all for naught and what if what if what i
Girl we get it
But anyways the last line was
'I see right through me'
Would obviously be referring to her own denial to see herself by ignoring š§š§ herrr fuckingnnnn problemmmsss and feeelinngggsss š¶š¶ cause hey. Why be sad when u can be glad and very very silly
Anyways the next part
'always an angel never a god'
BITCH
I feel so strongly abt this line rn
Obviously I'm on,
Jjk tok and so I kind of got the train of thought from there but
Always an angel never a god cause she can save as many lives as she tries but she can never save all the lives she cares about
Always an angel never a god cause despite being blessed with a power that gives her the parallel of an angel she can never save her world that will inevitably be destroyed by its own deity that granted her that power (since ig angels work under god/gods and so she'd be that angel working under the deity which would be the god and do you get what I mean)
ALWAYS AN ANGEL NEVER A GOD CAUSE WHILE SHE WANTS TO DO SO MUCH GOOD, YET SHES NEVER A GOD BECAHSE SHE DOESMT HAVE THE BENEVOLENCE OF A GOD CAUSE SHE STILL CARRIES THAT SELFISHNESS OF NEVER WANTING TO BE SPIDERGIRL AND HAVING THAG RESPONSIBILITYAJNNNNWNNENEJDD AUAUAYAUUUUUAHGGEEEUUEUEUEUUEUEUE BREAKS DOWN AND STARTS DISNETNTEGRSTING
yeah okay that's all and this is all just personal interpretation btw so it might not match up to its original meaning but HEY
im gonna go draw them hugging now or smth idk bye bye
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Hey Cin,
So with you recent arc of beginnings (OTW Baby HoJay, The twins exploring teen life, and the start of the Drake OG's beginning to embrace aging I had a perspective about Mercy who as mentioned is not going forward like her son & in-laws. I was thinking some people wild out in their teens to early 30's, some have mid life crisis and start acting out, and then there are some that for life circumstances don't wild out because either that just wasn't them as a person, OR they couldn't because... Life (like getting married very young or becoming a mom very young.) and later feel like they missed out. So when given an opportunity or two they take it. Indya gave her one, but... I wonder if Bishop also presents those opportunities to her? He's younger than her husband was, sexually adventurous, verbally commanding and has a street edge with some danger appeal. He's the exact opposite of her late husband and her own personality as well. This allows her in her mind to fulfill that FOMO, and for better or worse she is familiar with him (as much as he will allow.) But it also allows her to not stray too far from her personal norm due to her love for Jay Jay and her new DIL and grandbaby on the way; though the wine may give her away that she is not sure about her choices.
Kinda like Indya in her early days which cumulated in nights of passing out which may have been indicative of her not being completely on board with her own life choices.
Just a thought from one of you RRC members. :) *inserts imaginary gif of Sia's - Chandelier*
WELL DAMN!!!!
Y'all please drop a hand clap emoji in the replies for the EXCELLENT ANALYSIS and psychological breakdown of the good yet frustrating sis Mercy Carruthers!
First of all, I love how you tied in the wine. The only time we see Mercy drinking is in the middle of the night after demon sexy time. I also love how you paralleled that to Indya's early days of drinking/leaning. I ALSO also love the way you incorporated familiarity, too. Didn't we just hear Indya say she wouldn't have made it this far without her husband? Is that not familiarity? Would she be as accepting of forehead wrinkles without the familiar warmth of her husband's voice? NO, DAMN IT! So what makes Mercy any different than Indya or actual humans who seek out what's familiar for a sense of comfort even if it may not be good for us (or potentially kill us... looking at you, Bishop)?
ANYWAY!!!!!
The Ratchet Reading Roomā¢ never disappoints with the breaking down of the break downs and that's on London bridges falling down!
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Now that I'm thinking about it, why doesn't any of the 7th Division recognize Teru? Shouldn't they be like "hey wasn't this the kid that kicked our asses like 3 years ago, and we should try kidnapping him again?" My headcanon sequence of events:
Claw's 7th Division is established in Seasoning City. There's lot of jostling for power among the Scars, so there's a high turnover rate and things are very disorganized (as if this ever stopped lol)
A Scar hears about this little psychic boy and orders their goons to take him in for brainwashing
Tiny baby 10 year old Hanazawa Teruki beats the shit out of the Claw goons.
Oh what a coincidence, this occurs around the same time as the Ritsu Incidentā¦ because narrative parallels that's why
(This experience with Claw later inspires Teru to become the Urabancho when some delinquents try to bully him during his first year in junior high and he bullies them back, because he wants underlings too damn it. Although it probably just accidentally happened like with Mob and Onigawara)
The Scar loses their standing due to this hilarious failure to obtain a tiny child, and either flees via branch transfer or more likely, dies from the infighting. Claw politics are vicious y'all. But what about the goons? They're probably all dead too.
Except for one. Someone who was smart enough to run away when things got out of hand. Someone who has been with Claw since the beginning, and didn't survive this long without some good instincts. Someone who now viscerally understands the difference between a Natural esper and anyone else. This guy:
It's motherfucking Gen-san everyone
Anyways back to the timeline:
7th Division moves on because they don't actually care about expanding, they only care about their own standing. All the 7th Division Scars we see in canon have no idea who Hanazawa Teruki is. However, they know enough to send actual espers to get any future kids, because the goons are incompetent
7th Division Arc happens, and everyone scatters. Most of the goons return to normal society, but some just showed up at another branch a few weeks later.
World Dom Arc begins
But wait! If the data from the 7th Division never got back to HQ, then how did Claw know who to go after during World Dom? There are two possibilities:
The boring, probably canon one: Shou, knowing that this information was going to his father regardless of him, snitches! However, he then made sure that anyone sent after the targets would be weak.
My more fun headcanon: I don't think Shou would snitch on Teru or Reigen without making sure that they would escape unharmed, and he only had plans for the Kageyama household. But if Shou didn't snitch, then who did? I vote this guy:
The flame guy that Teru sent into a wall!
Probably what happened was that Touichirou sent his most annoying upper echelon Claws to eliminate any potential esper threats in Seasoning City; aka whoever took down the 7th Division. These Claws took one look at Reigen's website, saw his Twitter mentions, and was like lol this guy's a fake. But as a reward for his useful information, Flame guy gets to set fire to Reigen's office. No one had the presence of mind to go after Reigen's apartment despite him being doxxed already.
And the Claw that went after Teru? Well, he's one to hold grudges, and he never forgot the little psychic boy that utterly humiliated him and got him chased out of the 7th Division.
#SIKE#I definitely spent way too long thinking about this#but honestly I don't think canon directly contradicts any of this#nor do I care lol#hanazawa teruki#gen-san#7th division#claw#mp100#mp100 meta#enpr-ss
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Ashes of Memory trailer observations
y'all when i saw the poster for this update with Frederick instead of Norton and heard that the featured Hunter was gonna be BQ instead of Nightmare i was SO disappointed BUT this trailer laid my fears to rest and now i'm SUPER excited for this update because as all my fellow detectives doubtlessly do, i have questions. i also have a few points towards my theory that this (Alice's version of events) is some kind of parallel universe, ALTHOUGH the other theory i have is that "Orpheus"' version is somehow altered due to his memory loss issues and that Alice's version is the correct one.
first off, we have ANOTHER variant of the DeRoss family portrait, making this the fifth variant that i'm aware of to date.
remember from The Journalist's trailer that she has one variant of this portrait in her possession - it's going to be interesting hearing why it's so different.
i'll spare you another rant on the button eyes being significant somehow but also of note is that in the version that Alice has on her nightstand, it shows the same parents along with herself as a little girl, while obviously the version she finds in the Manor shows the parents with Orpheus and two other people. this leads me to another difference i find intriguing, and that is the comparison to the version of this portrait that The Novelist found in his memory of his Game. this one shows himself as a child along with his parents and Mr. and Mrs. Perez, the forest rangers. their faces are obscured along with that of young "Orpheus". now in the newest variant of this portrait, we get to see their faces, though they are now dressed as a farmer and a maid. i'm not sure if this indicates that the individuals pictured here are not the Perezes, or that in this version the Perez family had different roles in the Manor (if so, it will be fascinating to see whether their son did as well).
i thought this bird might be a nightingale which would have been rather poignant but it's not :/ unless it's a fantasy variant for this universe or something. i wanted to identify it to see if it was of some other significance, but the shot is just too blurry to get a positive ID. my closest guesses based off of that crest, the distinct black collar, and the beige to cream underside would be a Crested Tit (although - and forgive my American-ness here for a sec - the silhouette makes it look WAY more like our Blue Jays here in North America, although i doubt a Chinese design team would pick an American bird rather than a Eurasian species).
ON TO THE MOST INTERESTING PART. yes i will be bringing up my argument that Norton isn't a killer for the umpteenth time, and this time i have some damn good evidence. despite the trailer being REAL keen on making it look like he's pursuing the entomologist who's running for her life, further inspection shows that something very different is going on here. firstly, he's not looking ahead of him as if pursuing someone. he's looking behind him, as though he's the one being pursued.
slowing the clip down confirms this. you can also see that his expression looks worried, and it's clear why - he is in fact being pursued, and attacked, by a flock of ravens crows*. i don't think it's too big a leap to infer that he's actually being hunted by Nightmare.
which i feel is confirmed by the subsequent (almost immediately so) appearance of The Man Himself in this incredibly sickass shot
and another metaphorical shot of the moth (having been used as an allegory for Alice herself in the previous in-game event) being destroyed by the raven crow* during Bird DILF's epic entrance.
*i am fully aware they're supposed to be ravens but they're so petite they look much more like crows (ravens are overall much beefier-looking than crows).
so i guess my hopes for this update at this point are 1) more Norton and possibly Bane content, 2) clarification on the whole Perez family and their relationship to the DeRoss family, and 3) Norton's name being cleared once and for all. i also will be appreciating any and all Nightmare content UwU
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dts s2 e6-7
e6 -ALEX EPISODE -every time ive watched this episode and he says his sisters name (zoe) it's startled me. i anticipate it and it surprises me every time -"we are trying to give young people a chance. That's part of the Red Bull philosophy." (Helmut Marko) oh ok. oh OK. OH OK. -i need him biblically. i need him in a way that's concerning for feminism -OK UM so i watched the first half in the morning and the second half after my shift and i was like. im so wiped idk how emotionally i'll even be able to engage -and damn do i truly underestimate my ability to be affected by something i've seen and heard about over and over again. -ok but the parallels between alex's mom talking about being scared as a mom vs daniel's mom talking about the same thing in s1e1 -random cate sighting is crazy i almost forgot how she dated pierre lmao -god i NEED an alex/williams episode next season i miss him on this show soooooo much -its silly but every time i see that clip of anthoine kissing his girlfriend its instant waterworks
e7: -first of all obsessed with seb saying y'all. love him miss him sm -GOD you can just see how charles still has hopes and dreams here he hasnt been crushed and hardened by the ferrari machine yet. what a sweet time for him :/ -sebchal makes me so *gnawing at the bars of my enclosure* -part of me wishes they showed charles' win at monza w/ more charles centric focus? it was such a big deal for him and i think it deserved more. THAT BEING SAID it does set up the sebchal rivalry dynamic well, which is what the documentarians chose to focus on, and for that they did well. -i could say the same for seb's singapore win. it makes sense from a storytelling persepctive to focus on these from the rivalry lense but damn do i know these are iconic wins for both of them and its bittersweet that they don't get their own focus -i'm so confused how charles literally looks straight down the camera lense and says that he was signed with the knowledge that he'd be second to seb, and then gets MAD when they prioritize seb???? like when they prioritize charles seb has ever right to be mad bc that goes against what he was told but charles?????? i know that its bc theyre gonna be super competitive no matter what they're told bc its in their nature but Come Onn -"every world champion has what I term an 'inner bastard', and its the ability to make the tough decision when you have to." i do NOT take will buxton slander on this blog. i love this quote sm and as a baby fan it was big in understanding driver v team politics. it is SUCH an important skill to know when to be a team player and when to be selfish, and the ones who figure it out are the ones who maximize best outcomes. (a good example of this recently imo is carlos in singapore!) -"we'll start by holding hands." when i know its coming and i'm still vibrating gnawing on my enclosure etc etc. brainworms well and alive and fed -GOD rly puts into perspective how charles has been being fucked over by the ferrari engine since Day One -sebastian vettel has the vibes of a restaurant manager who isn't doing the greatest job but he'll never get in trouble because every single waitress is swooning every time he speaks. let me know if this makes sense -with more seb history context: i wonder how much this parallels to the dynamic in rb when daniel joined--and he left the following year. christian talks all about daniel "running from a fight" with max... wonder if thats also, at least in these instances, sebs instinct as a driver in this system. don't take this analysis too serious btw i'm just spitballin
#she speaks#dtsrewatch#i was gonna get episode 7 2night but i am so so sleepy i'm gonna take a midday nap and we'll see what i can do tomorrow!#i've also been Very Busy setting up my sims wedding its very important
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Ok wait wait wait.
The idea abt the horny pill - just hear me out.
Wolveria - master of writing, what if you wrote a mini mini fanfic of your fanfic that either gives the reader or scp049 the pill (or both of them?). I'm not sure which one would be more interesting, but I think we need the idea to come to life now.
#horny
Obviously nothing long but GAH DAMN I need to know what would happen.
(AAAA what if it gets given to the reader and idk the only way to take the effects off is to do the horny and scp 049 knows that? HOW WOULD SCP 049 REACTTT? Or or or it gets given to the scp and scp049 kinda tries to not give in to it but eventually starts making subtle moves on the reader and uses its super lustful eyes? Ok ok stahp it, myself)
If it's not too much to ask of course :< No pressure if u don't do it, I'm sure you have got a lot on your schedule. Hope ur doing well and sorry for the long read ā¤ļø
I do have a lot on my schedule BUT I also love considering scenarios like this. Ones that won't make it into the main fic but are still so good that they should be written somewhere.
I may consider creating an off-shoot fic (and turn Raven's Hymn into a series) that can be like "In Another Universe" type ideas. Because in the SCP universe, there are literally countless other dimensions and parallel universes, right? So these could be glimpses into those other universes, where maybe Reader or 049 gets a horny pill. We don't even have to stop there, I can add more ideas as you guys come up with them. I think that would be very interesting ;)
And if there's a lot of interest, I could make each chapter be its own one shot exploring different situations. I think that would be only fair, because honestly I'm at about 48k words right now in my word doc, and they only just FINALLY hugged.
Y'all this slow burn killing me, and I want to get to some horny just like the rest of you. So this can be our cheat code to getting there x3 If this is something you guys really want, I'll do it.
#the raven's hymn#anon#update#here's my call to action to get feedback from you guys#i love my slow burn but also i kind of want to hurry up and write some 049 smut already
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Discovery Season 1 Episode 9-
Episode 9-
Listen, you never plan to retire or to tell your husband you're going to be able to do whatever he wants after this one last mission/jump. That's when things go wrong.
Time travel or alternate universe? Find out next time!
Episode 10-
Time for a character roundup! on the axes of interesting and likeability...
Lorca- Interesting character if a little cliche, unlikeable. 9/10
Burnham- Interesting character, likeable. 10/10
Saru- Interesting, undecided. 7/10
Tyler- I don't think I like him much. 5/10
Tilly- Not particularly interesting, but likeable and relatable. 10/10
Georgiou- Interesting, likeable, badass, but -1 point for being dead. 99/10
Admiral- Not particularly interesting yet, but has potential. Undecided. 6/10
It's interesting that they have evasive maneuver patterns... It seems like a waste of a good pilot's instincts. The way that the captain has to decide which pattern to use, relay it to the pilot, the pilot has to recall what motions to take for that pattern, and then enact it feels like it would take precious seconds that might be better used in a "It doesn't matter what you do as long as you do something" reaction.
Alternate universe it is!
Michael's hair is always excellent.
Man I knew there was something still shady about Tyler. Fuckin Manchurian Candidate. Dude is not ready to be doing any of what he's trying to do. "I need you to trust me." No. You can't trust yourself, how are you going to expect anyone else to trust you? Tyler and Lorca both, man. Making decisions to protect themselves that can (and certainly will) put others in danger.
Hey Terran Empire, that's the same as the Enterprise's alternate universe.
Hah Tilly's captain. Talk as little as possible. That might be a problem.
And then Lorca does a Scottish voice for the Engineer. :joy: that a Scotty reference?
I like the way they actually show the tech that (as far as i know) got handwaved in other shows. The change of the Discovery's designation by robot, the synthesizing of uniforms and ranks. It makes it feel more scifi vs scifantasy.
Heh they specifically test for Manchurian/brainwashing stuff.
The weird half bob of Tilly's is... interesting.
Damn that was a line... "If you talked to me like that I would cut out your tongue and use it to lick my boots."
OH SHIT. That's not cool! You can't kill the gays.
I don't like the gender neutral 'sir' and I'm not really sure why.
Aww that was the guy I liked? Connor? I didn't recognize him :joy: I didn't actually look at him for long before he died the first time.
lol Tyler and Michael fucking while Lorca gets tortured. Way to make it quick, y'all.
Episode 11
Oh no... they're going to think that Stamets killed him :(
Is that Starfleet assigned/synthesized lingerie or is it Empire? :joy:
Sparing Saru from knowing his counterpart is a slave who waits on her in this universe. :sob:
(I just realized that where Enterprise was bloodless and nobody was Really Dead, I had no hesitation to believe Culbert was dead.)
They changed the way Andorians look (and sound) too?
I don't... I don't know if I don't like this thing with Tyler because he's not convincing? Or if I don't like the arc itself? I'm not sure.
Now that's an interesting moral quandary. The easy route is to let the Terrans execute him- he's a threat and a murderer. But is it 'right'?
UNBURY your gays.
Heh... I called that one. beam him out just in time to beam him aboard the Discovery. Oh nice, she got the chip out too! I didn't see that one coming.
Ha! The Emperor. I kinda figured (how could it not be if Burnham was captain of Shenzou and they wouldn't say who the emperor was), but man what a gut punch for her.
I forget where to put it now, but the Defiant... is that the one that the mirror!Enterprise found in that docking bay? The time fuckery ontop of the parallel universes has my head spinning, especially since I wasn't closely watching ENT.
Episode 12
I didn't like the mirrorverse episodes of Enterprise- they were both too dark for the show they were in and yet not dark enough to be believable.
I do like this arc, though. It feels like it has the right weight and other than the Tyler plot, it feels believable and consistent. The characters are interacting with the world in consistent, believable ways. Maybe it was because in Enterprise, we were watching actors in different characters?
Fixing Stamets and the only way home while also pretending to be a bloodthirsty captain is a lot of pressure for a cadet.
omg. Have my ganglia :joy:
idk why I forgot about what happened to Voq. I guess I assumed he died.
I was trying to figure out why they couldn't pick between turning Klingon into human or overlaying the Klingon personality into Tyler, but I guess I misunderstood. They overlaid TYLER ontop of the Klingon turned human. Man that's complicated.
How weird it must be to hear the man you loved died... from him.
UNBURY THAT GAY.
Ew- a father 'turned more'?
Oh what the fuck. Ok this one I didn't see coming. Wow. I'm impressed. His ruthlessness. His pulling the puppet strings of fate. The light sensitivity. It's rare that I don't have an inkling of a well-designed twist. Well played.
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