#because snarry can be funny

[consistentsquash]

HP Rec Fest - Day 16

Fest - @hprecfest Theme - A fic that made you laugh

Snarry is complicated/messy/angsty. But also funny! Lots of Snarry fics are really funny deconstructions of some super popular tropes during the eras they got written. Today I got ten Snarry fics that made me laugh. Nobody asked me for a list but I made one anyway because Snarry!!!

D for Defender by Amand_r. Bat Snape forever <3

There's a man stalking the Wizarding world. Or a bat. Maybe a Man-Bat. Severus is probably having an affair, Harry's tired all the time, oh, and those drunks out in East Anglia are complaining about the green lights. Again.

The GL, Oder Der Giftige Lautsprecher, nicht wahr? by Rakina. Snape is a dick shaped plant. Literally.

This looked something like a round gourd, bulbous and flushed red. As Harry stared at it he realised the gourd's shape was alarmingly testicular, and the dusting of dark bristles over its surface did nothing to lessen the resemblance.

Better Homes and Dungeons by abstractconcept. Relationship problems because Snape and Harry of course are awful at communication.

“He’s bored with me,” Snape said despondently. “Naturally,” Draco replied, draining his gin and tonic. “You don’t throttle him nearly enough.” He poured himself another glass. “Learn to keep your relationship more exciting. Break out the whips more often.”

Sheer Dumb Luck by rexluscus. Of course the best solution to win the war is screwing Snape. Literally. Also in other ways.

For once, Harry and Voldemort want the same thing, and they want it from Snape.

Fall into Charybdis by Nimori. Dirtybadhotwrong. Also funny!

"Of course." Harry waited until the floo whooshed, then rounded on Snape. "What are you playing at, you greasy prick?" "I think you should call me Dad," Snape said, examining his nails.

Protosnape by suitesamba. Snarry authors also write non dirtybadhotwrong. Sorry if my recs gave you the wrong impression at any point. This one is wholesome and funny!

When WWW decides to add Headmaster Snape to their Wizarding Heroes Action Figure line, Harry begins a correspondence with Snape’s cousin to iron out the details of the prototype. Albert Prince Jr. has some very specific ideas, and Harry soon finds himself counting buttons and measuring cauldron bottoms in a bid to get the action figure to market, and to find out a bit more about this mysterious cousin.

Great Liars, Great Magicians by LoupGarou. BACK TO THE DIRTYBADHOTWRONG.

Dumbledore forces Harry to bond with Snape, who demands an heir, but when Harry announces his pregnancy, Snape doesn't believe him. The road to hell may be paved with good intentions, but the path to love is strewn with sex, lies, and manipulations.

A Tolerable End to an Unfortunate Situation by who_la_hoop. Of course Snape doesn't stay dead. Of course he is a problem.

When a dead, naked Snape enters the Great Hall – resurrected from the dead and out for Harry Potter's blood – it's the start of a whole new set of problems for the reluctant hero of the wizarding world.

Pink Slip by Cluegirl. Voldemort wins and ofc Harry is tortured. Really tortured :D

It is a long-held tradition for the children of one's enemies to be fostered in one's own household in order to enforce both sides' adherence to a treaty of peace. Harry doesn't find much comfort in the peace that has been bought with his freedom, but he's just a Fosterling in the house of Malfoy -- his only avenue of complaint lay with his Welfare Overseer, one Severus Snape.

Unexpected by Seeker. Snape gets deaged and everybody exploits that. Really exploits him :D

Thirty years as a Death Eater cum double agent and it came down to this.

Recs I made for this fest

[gender-trash]

incredibly funny how a bunch of people interpreted “ao3 was almost certainly scraped as part of the gpt training dataset because it’s a big easily accessible body of english language text, so you can prompt gpt with surprisingly vague stuff and it will autocomplete with snarry underage or wangxian a/b/o” as “elon musk Personally is Currently scraping ao3 and training an ai to plagiarize fic, going to go lock ALL my works on ao3 IMMEDIATELY”

its. its already in the dataset. how do you think these things work. “locking my works to registered users only until after the scraping stops!” my dude the ao3 team just needs to like add a robots.txt and check the useragent and stuff to prevent this from happening in the future*, and theyre already on it, but not only is the existing body of work presumably In the Dataset, the model has ALREADY BEEN TRAINED. that omelet isnt going to get unscrambled

(*im assuming that everyone gathering datasets for large language models is being reasonably Polite about it bc these are both very simple to circumvent — if this assumption is false then ao3 might need to graduate to Offensive Measures but also we would definitely need to bully the culprits off of hacker news)

anyway im not taking any Stance one way or the other on the “ai art debate” (other than maybe “none of you know what the hell you’re talking about”) but we’re definitely going to see a whole new world of copyright claims against the big art models and ml researchers developing new tools for “removing” stuff from a trained model, and i for one think that it will be SO entertaining to watch

[flymetosnarryland]

GTFO.

Did anyone miss Muggle London like I did? 🙃

This series as a part of "Infraction" has grown incredibly. It helped me understand a lot about things I want to write and made me think about "Infraction" as... well, my first real baby, lol. I wrote one Snarry, "Oblivion" already, but I take that story as testing the waters. I tried to know Harry and Severus, placing them in situation close to, eh, something that happened to me in a way. It means a lot to me and I'm proud of myself that I managed to write a fic from the start to the end.

"Infraction" on the other hand... this one is going to be really FAT piece of work and I'm excited over the moon about it. First chapter and the first part of second already landed on Ao3, but when am I going to finish the next part of it? (If anyone is interested at all, because I personally don't touch unfinished pieces, knowing how it works 🤣)

Well, to be honest, I decided to not rush it. Not because I don't know what to write. The main outline of the story has 40k+ words. It appeared that planning a series of murders is not so easy 😂 especially when the politics are part of it (I mean, Merlin... that's the last thing I thought I will EVER write, lol) and on top of that I have some complicated relationships (or, I suppose, a cherry on molten chocolate cake 🤤). Which makes me shiver and scream, that much I want to jump into writing it again. But the more I am thinking about the plot and fitting everything I need into it (of course writing it down), the more I'm surprised that I am able to figure out something that seems damn complex to me and my three brain cells 😂 I want to be proud of this story. I want it to be... maybe not perfect, but as good as I can see, it can be. And I enjoy the idea of growing as hobby writer. It makes me really happy. Also it's my first serious CRIME story. I know I said before that I always wanted to write crime. I always thought though it's out of my range, you know, I'm too dumb to bring something interesting that other people could possibly like as I do. But with this story I'm trying new things (like bringing Marauders to life), I'm thinking in advance, I'm on both sides: the detective and the serial killer and... GOSH. I really think it will have sense and be worth to waste some time on reading it, lol!

Also there is Snarry AUctoberfest on the way and, you know, I decided I'll try to write something for the fest for the first time! (It's my year of many first times and I really like it!) Funny thing, it appears that my fic for the fest will be a little test to what I want to do with "Infraction." When it occured to me (don't ask how it happen, but the idea I've had in mind turned 180 degree and I couldn't help it! Had to just go for it 😂) I was stunned. But in the same way it's a great opportunity to try new things, see how it will go and how it will work before I'll jump back to my baby.

If anyone checked "Infraction", please don't be mad or sad or... disappointed or angry (?), that I'm not updating it yet. This fic is absolutely my main focus and I'm tinkering and working on it. As for everything, I need time (and probably cut some other projects while I will write it; so less drawing going to be main part of the writing process 🙃 I suppose in the last quarter of the year; except if I'll have my holiday from work!)

Ah, dang. I wrote a lot here, I suppose? Less shite than messy personal stuff, but still something I guess, I wanted to share? Even if I think it's pointless and worthless, because who cares, lol. I'm learning, trying to share, I think. I should, as I wasn't doing it at all and it suppose to help me to... leave the shell of person that other people think I am. Because I grew to be someone irl that I'm really tired of being. Of pretending to be. How stupid it all sounds it's beyond me and I still deny to admit it.

[sitp-recs]

HP Rec Fest, Day 23

I can’t say soulmate AUs are among the things I read the most but every now and then I feel a soft yearning for that trope and I’m always open to new angsty interesting takes on it. I know this is a great comfort trope for many readers so I really wanted to do is justice at @hprecfest. I’m reccing two of my favourite authors, and I just realized that’s two Snarry recs in a row (you’d think I read this ship every other day which is def not the case as I’m very picky - I can picture Writ laughing at this 😂). Incidentally, both fics are 9k which means everyone will have two nice short treats to check before the Christmas Eve chaos. Oh, I’ve also recced a Rarry soulmate fic here, highly recommend it as well. Enjoy!

Day 23) a soulmate fic:

Drarry

swallow your words by @candybarrnerd (E, 9k)

The truth is, not many things are known about the magic that is behind soulmarks. They'll turn up when they want and not before. The truth is, you don't get a choice in your soulmark. The truth is, not everyone is okay with that.

what I really adore about this fic is that… they’re already there, right from the start. they fall for each other before Harry’s mark shows up (and of course it’s their first words to each other 🥺) and the lowkey angst comes from their sudden appearance and Draco’s not-so-receptive initial reaction to them. I say lowkey angst because the fic opens with such a gorgeous, intimate and tender lovemaking scene it’s impossible to believe they’re not already head over heels for each other - but learning that there’s someone “destined” for you out there brings implications and complications that Draco’s not yet ready to face. I love this take on the trope because that immediate panic and resistance to the whole soulmate concept is so relatable and raises a great question about predetermined x freely chosen love which I think it’s a fascinating and very mature discussion involving this trope.

Rare pair

A Universe of Searching Souls by @writcraft (Harry/Snape, E, 9k)

When the small, innocuous mark on Harry’s hip begins to cause him discomfort, he decides to go and visit the person who has a similar mark of their own. He’s fairly certain there must be some mistake, because the universe wouldn’t be daft enough to give Harry and Severus matching soul bond marks. Would it?

god help me, I’m so weak for Writ’s Snarry. this 9k fic actually feels longer thanks to the brilliant format and Harry’s compelling pov. I love the narrative style that highlights the passage of time through short (then not so short) vignettes covering Harry’s teenage and early adult years. he’s so lovely, earnest and tentative, a sharp contrast to this Snape who’s as insufferable and difficult - and therefore, perfect - as ever. I just reread this last night and am still howling at “I refuse to dismantle my wards for your stupid convenience Potter, you might as well stay the night” 😂 if you’ve read Writ’s other works you know their chemistry is deliciously addictive, charming and funny and full of blatant UST; the way Snape gets so easily undone by Harry’s eager honesty always gets me. for such a short story this is a masterclass in anticipation, and when they finally get there it’s hot af but also calm, intimate, familiar. definitely a must read!

[cailynwrites]

Harry Potter Rec Fest Day 26 - an ending you can't stop thinking about

Thinking about a fic after you finish reading it is, I believe, one of the highest compliments an author can be paid. I read/listen to a lot of fic, but here are a few for @hprecfest Day 26 that stick out in my memory.

the dogfather by @nonasuch Pairing: none Word count: 47,681 Rating: T

Fix-its are, of course, always refreshing, but this one stuck out to me particularly. It's funny, and sweet, and moves quickly, but it perfectly captures how much harm could have been prevented if a few small things had changed. I don't want to spoil anything, but imagine if canon were less than 50K words ...

The Inconvenient Death(s) of Harry Potter by @nv-md Pairing: Draco x Harry Word count: 33,105 Rating: E

Harry and Draco have spent the decade since the War avoiding each other, even as they’re forced to work together at the Ministry and their friend groups begin to alarmingly overlap. But what happens when Harry meets a tragic end (in a manner of speaking) and Draco’s the only one who can save him? Or Harry won’t stop dying, Draco’s had too much coffee, and there’s more than enough time for them to make a mess of each other’s lives.

I'm partial to time loops because I love Prisoner of Azkaban and Doctor Who. I think it shows a certain kind of creativity to be able to imagine the same basic events in a variety of different ways and bring them to a satisfying conclusion. This story ups the ante by having Draco try to prevent Harry's death.

Connecting Lines, Connecting Crimes by @sleepstxtic Pairing: Draco x Harry Word count: 15,216 Rating: M

I already piled on @xanthippe74's rec of this fic here, but I simply can't stop gushing about this story. Suffice it to say, this work is so clever in the way it uses magic to demonstrate the power imbalance between so-called "developed" and "developing" nations, especially with regard to the environment. Have I piqued your interest yet?

************************************************************************

And finally, a couple of little self-recs ...

The Warmth at Our Backs by @malpal132 - a Podfic (Spotify) Pairing: Draco x Hermione Word count: 5,915 Length: 42:24 Rating: M

This fic was written and recorded for @etl-echo-audiobooks's Winter WonderFics Fest last year. It's a little dark and a lot wonderful. It has an excellent sexy mirror scene, and the plot is something I don't see often enough: Draco actually needing to save Hermione from something (herself and her quest for knowledge).

Shapes in the Deep by @ac1d6urn and taxonomic with podfic by me Pairing: Harry x Severus Word count: 20,068 Length: 2:10:14 Rating: E

I was so pleased to participate in the @snarrybang 2023 with these creative people. It's creepy and Lovecraftian, but also funny and weird. It's based on the video game Dredge, which I haven't played and which seems too scary for me. But it's a great setting for this different kind of Snarry. Technically, it's not the ending that I can't stop thinking about, but the climax right before; I still get shivers.

[danpuff-ao3]

Hi Danni! If you could rec just one Snarry fic to convert someone curious , what would it be? :)

Ooh! That's a tough one! Let's see...🤔

If I knew the person and their preferences, I could better narrow it down to their taste. For example: how do they feel about underage works? Or student/teacher? What level of angst are they comfortable with? Etcetera. In fact, when I was drafting a rec list for @sitp-recs I DMed her to check first. (I meant the list to be a surprise, but I wanted to feel confident I was giving her good choices, so alas!)

But for a blind rec...where there's no time/opportunity to get a feel for what parameters to work within...making sure I had a "safe" choice that was both well written and enjoyable, but also does service to my OTP (at least in my mind.) Because for me, I won't feel like I've properly converted someone unless a story feels truly Snarry to my soul (just for me personally!) So stories where I feel the characters are done justice and their dynamic is the intense emotional mess that makes it so delicious...🥰 What gives someone a good feel for the ship and its potential...

I think the best answer for that has to be Rapture by mia_ugly. Which is (rightfully) recced all the dang time! It's truly a classic. What's funny is, despite its popularity and all the high praise, I put off reading it for the longest time! Time travel isn't usually my thing. But when I finally sat down with it, I couldn't put it down! And then I was mad I'd waited so long to read it!!

It is truly the most gorgeous romance. It will absolutely touch your heart. It's beautifully written. The people and emotions all feel so very real.

...and me being me I can never just give one answer. 😉 So I'd be tempted to slip in The Beating of This Fragile Heart by @writcraft if I knew the person was as much of a time-travel skeptic as me. It's such a lovely love story and packed with fluff and angst. For those I knew could handle a bit more intensity, and a bit more raw and rough characterizations, I'd suggest When the Rose and the Fire Are One by @perverse-idyll. For those who could handle more questionable subject matter and a darker story, I'd suggest In Between Days by atrata.

For me personally, those more intense and dark stories are more likely to sell me on any given thing 😂 But I do truly think Rapture is a story for everyone and I think if Rapture doesn't get you, I don't know what will! I know for a fact that Rapture has pulled many people into the Snarry life!

[perverse-idyll]

Your fanfiction works have moved me to tears, and so I'm wondering: has there been any HP fanfictions that have moved you to tears? Whether happy, sad, frustrating, beautiful or even funny?

Anon, that is such a lovely, lovely thing to say. Thank you so much. Readers' generosity is truly a gift.

But what has moved me to tears? I'm afraid long-term exhaustion has scrambled my memory, and I recall moments rather than entire stories that stir me. I'm not usually a crier; it's more the sensation of being stretched emotionally to the limit, in a grateful, painful, exhilarating way. So keeping that in mind, here's the best I can do. Maybe some of my friends, if they see this post, will chime in.

Rapture by mia_ugly. One of the most heartfelt Snarry fics ever written, but it was the breaking of the fourth wall that tipped me over the edge. That's somewhat tarnished now because it's harder to believe JKR once understood the spirit of compassion or love, but fortunately Mia's fic overflows with both.

Night-blooming heartsease by julad. Snape/Neville. Written long before the end of the series, so Snape is a little different than we see him now. Marvelous from start to finish.

A Matter of Intent by Florahart. Snarry, sort of. Snape is just so fucking brave here. It hurts.

Always Hungry by melora98, Snarry, again sort of. Sorry, I'm tossing you a bunch of oldies here. But this one hurt because Snape knew what he was doing. It makes me clutch my heart. He knew what would happen to him. And then his message to Harry - well, you'll see.

Morior Animus by Vain. Snarry, sort of. I hurt for both of them. An excruciatingly quiet and devastating little fic.

The Boy Who Lived by Delphi. Contains Snape/Dumbledore. Brief, beautiful, and the ending touched a chord in me that vibrated for a long time.

Father to the Man by Delphi. Snape/Filch. This fic is many things, but there's one section that makes me ache. And the ending is a rare example of the kind of hope that corresponds to a sweet pain. An "if only" sort of wistfulness.

Penultimate Acts by pasi. Snape gen. There's a moment toward the end that makes me dig my nails into my palms. It's a fleeting acknowledgement of how little chance Snape ever had to experience ordinary, I might almost say innocent, happiness. But it's the sort of moment that might not strike someone else the same way.

That's all I can summon up right now, barring the ones that twist the knife because they conform to Snape's canon death, such as Arrisha's The Syntax of Things, or fics whose entire premise is a tearjerker, like Cybele's If You Are Prepared.

I hope something in this list gives you what you're looking for, or even the same feeling it gave me. I know I'm leaving out a lot of glorious fics that deserve to be here, but if you don't mind other readers filling in the gaps, maybe they can dig up a few more treasures. ❤️

[suitesamba]

Secret Snarry Swap 2022 Recs

The fial Secrety Snarry Swap posted in December anonymously and author reveals went up a couple weeks ago. I had some clear favorites in this one, and had a fest entry of my own which I’ve incldued. 

Foolish Wand Waving by NecromanticNoir  19,092 words Explicit

The fest opened with this one, which hit nearly all the tropes. Mind the warnings as you proceed and if you dont know anything about OnlyFans (I was in that category and watched a Documentary about it after reading this!) hang on to your seats. It’s funny, surprising, and despitre being a non-magical AU, full of magic. Excellent writing and story-crafting, and I especially enjoyed the dialogue. 

Summary:  Harry Potter has an OnlyFans. Severus, only knowing it's a platform where you can post videos and people pay you, makes an educational one for 'Potions'. He is quite shocked when, in a bout of curiosity, he subscribes to Harry - and hears his own voice in the background of... rather different content.

Friends of Dorothy by Writcraft    22,000 words Explicit

Another excellent fic by this always satisfying author. It’s very Harry-Severus centrc, though it features a couple of really good original characters.  My comment:  “Perfect. Excellent writing and has all the elements I love in a good snarry - great OCs, good dialogue, believable character growth and that simmering connection between Harry and Severus. Couldn't put this one down.”

Summary:  When Harry Potter sees Severus Snape on a date with another wizard it sets him on a journey of self-discovery that leads to the Friends of Dorothy Detective Agency and a Niffler called Toto.

Pipe Dreams by Nesting Hedwig  12,874 words, Teen and up

This one brought back visions of my dad on his back under the bathroom sink trying vaiently to fix the leacky pipes.  And if THAT’s not a reason to read a fic, what is? 

Another well-writen, original fic which is very Harry/Severus centric and is really their re-introduction to each other. Leaves us with a lot of promise and hope. 

Summary:  Just before closing time on Christmas Eve, Harry Potter stopped to pick up an order from the village plumbing supply shop. The last person he ever expected to meet in one of the aisles was Severus Snape.

The Private Collection of S. Snape by PinaNaponi  6336 words  Explicit

A 5X fic in which Severus spends a lot of time watching Harry have sex and then finally gets to have sex with Harry.  The story is well-constructed, the sex is hot and the pacing good. As always, mind the warnings.

Summary:  Severus likes to watch. Potter doesn't seem to mind. Or: Five times Severus witnesses Potter get railed, and the one time he finally gets to do the railing.

Stasis by Avioleta  12,206 words  Explicit

Avioleta is one of my favorite authors, and she once again produced a story that pulled me in. The story takes place at Grimmauld Place just after the war, with Harry coming and going on Auror business and Severus whiling away the hours until he can return to Hogwarts and definitely not thinking about Harry. Excellent writing, as always.

My comment:   Achingly, amazingly perfect. I loved reading every word of this fic -it felt so intimate, so personal. Sparse and full at the same time. Gorgeous.

Summary:  After the war, Severus Snape recuperates at Grimmauld Place.

And finally - my entry:

Spy Glass by Suitesamba  18,135 words  Explicit

I wrote this one because I couldn’t get the prompt out of my head:  Severus's new job in insurance results in him having to trail Quidditch player!Harry around to assess the international Seeker for Harry's insurance renewal.

This one is all about the humor, with Severus masquerading as a female reporter, some “boy and his broom” innuendo, unlicensed sex therapy, Quidditch god Harry and a bit of fun with George and Angelina.

Summary:  England wants to insure star Seeker Harry Potter and his fabulous broom. Enter Severus Snape, wizarding investigator extraordinaire, ready to calculate risk and assess value. Tailing Harry Potter turns out to be the job of his dreams, though he wishes it could be done without the disguise. A tale of a man’s obsession, another man’s obsession, and a heartwarming ending where everyone ultimately gets what they want – or what they need.

[turanga4]

ship game Snarry

KILL IT.

KILL IT WITH FIRE.

Oopsie, sorry, lost my manners there for a moment.

Thank you for lovely and compelling Ask Item, which I shall answer calmly and with impressive restraint.

Yeah, that's a Don't Ship It.

Why not? I'm a teacher myself, and for that reason, I do not personally ship any kind of romantic relationship between professors who knew their partners as kids and kids who knew their partners as professors, even if the relationship begins when both parties are of age. The power differential is just too great: perhaps because I genuinely feel strongly that romantic/erotic love is not the absolute only and highest love two unrelated people can share, I really do struggle to envision a scenario in which a romantic/erotic connection is the healthiest pinnacle of what a student and a teacher can be for one another. And that's even BEFORE you throw in elements of "Hey, funny story, one of the main reasons I was a jerk to you for several years was that I INITIALLY very much wished to bone your mom." I admit, there are probably things I do not fully understand, and I don't intend to seem uncharitable or imply that people who creatively ship these two characters are in fact flawed humans who do bad things in the actual world (I would vehemently disagree with such an assertion). But yeah, it's a nope, for me.

What would make me like it? Changes to both characters--their fundamental selves and their stations in life--that would render them entirely different characters, so nah.

Anything positive to say about it? There are things I truly appreciate about the canon relationship that the two characters do have--the bravery, tenacity, and absolute loneliness of Snape's commitment, however flawed in execution, towards Harry, and Harry's immediate empathetic response to Snape as he died in front of him: as the narrator, Harry himself expresses that he has no idea WHY he acts as he does, but when Snape grabs him and "pull(s) him close", he doesn't recoil, and when Snape says "look at me", he complies at once. I've also read some compelling fan fics with the premise of Snape acting more directly to protect and mentor Harry: two that come to mind are Tension's Empathy: The Wanderer's Curse by yarrowmirth and Cantus Dimindium Argenteum by mogu2mochi.

[moinsbienquekaworu]

2023 edition under the readmore! It's been almost a year but I didn't want to wait like, 4 days to post this exactly on the aniversary haha. I hope I make this a tradition it's very fun. Once again, don't like don't look, I'm going to talk about what I ship and there's still stuff most people don't like, on top of me being a nerd about stats. This is your fair warning, leave now while you still can, I was considerate with my readmore.

First, you can tell I actually learnt how to use spreadsheets, look at how beautiful this is <3 I changed the colours to make them somewhat relevant to the folder, though it didn't always work out super well.

The interesting stuff is that I added two folders, James Bond and Venom, which is normal and we knew that (I knew it because I've been going insane about these two things, you knew it because if you're reading this you like me and you've seen me going insane about these things on here recently). What's surprising is the absolutely batshit crazy quantity of Venom fic in that folder. I think I missed one that's hanging out in the misc folder but 142?? I've been reading fic for that fandom since the 8th of may! This is what happens when you download every fic you read til the end. A little insane. I'm having fun with it though so y'know. Compared to that the 57 James Bond/00Q fics are a little sad, especially if you take into account there's ~twice as much 00Q as there is Symbrock on AO3. In any case, those are the newcomers!

You can also tell Obikin still has a death grip on me, +132 fics is really impressive! That doubled the size of the Obikin folder! The SW folder also doubled but it's less impressive when you start out at 20 fics lol/ I sorted some of it and a fair part of that +20 is me scouring the Quiobiani tag haha. What I've also been reading is smut, it seems, though +46 is reasonable for a whole year. I think that folder is the one that's going to be growing at a steady but constant rate, because I always end up in the mood for some smut at some point or another. The OFMD influx is me falling back into it and getting into Steddy Hands for my presentation on queerbaiting and how OFMD is great.

I think it's funny that even though I've been reading a lot of other stuff Snarry is STILL on top of that list too. Like you can really tell who had an impact on my life with those numbers. A little sad that Obikin is most likely going to get ahead of it really soon though :( I mean I love Obikin, I didn't buy the zine for nothing (can't wait for it to arrive oh god) but Snarry was my adolescence! These two mean a lot to me even if I'm rarely in the mood for them now! Obikin rewired my brain but Snarry is like. The foundations of my person. Who would I be without them.

Anyway those were the stats, in a year I read at least 500 fics, and once I'm done here I will be going right back to work scouring the Symbrock tag. I really really want to record the length and tags to have actual stats (ie x number of omegaverse, x number of soulmate fic, how many words I read, etc) but it would be SO SO LONG and time consuming so I will not. Sucks though it would be great. See you next year!

And I did the stats! I'm absurdly proud of my little digital fanfic library but it's basically a history of the fanfic I've been reading since I discovered fandom, so I'm putting the graph and more explanations under the readmore, in case you don't care/don't want to see which weird ships I like/used to like (since I won't be tagging the post because I don't want that in the general tags). Proceed at your own risk!

Okay! So. First off, I've had that collection for almost five years now I'd say, I don't have the oldest dates but that's when I started discovering fandom. I started downloading fics to be able to read on my phone even when I didn't have an internet connection (and downloading fics from FFNet wasn't the easiest), and then when I started using AO3 I thought I'd get the fics I liked in case they disappeared or something. They're all epubs and I can make annotations in my ereader app, which is also pretty cool (my 'copies' of Cambiare Podentes or Pacify are full of notes from multiple rereadings throughout the years and that's very fun) In total I have 1311, which is a respectable number I think.

All the smaller folders - anything 15 fics or less - are mostly old fandoms for which I never read a lot of fic. There are separate Harry Potter and Star Wars folders because those are for gen fics and the ship folders are for, well, ship fics. Fandoms like Sherlock, OFMD or Gravity Falls don't have separate ship folders because they're either 90% ship or gen fics, and a folder for a few gen/ship fics would be useless. The 'originales' folders are original fic, with a PWP variant because sometimes you want to peruse the SFW folder and not the smut one or vice-versa. The older folders are probably the Drarry or Snarry ones, as well as the Sherlock and the Originales ones, because they're the ones with fics in french in them and I stopped reading fic in french years ago to pivot entirely to english.

As for analysing this: I knew what the results would look like, because 1) it's my collection I know what I read and download and 2) I regularly sort the fics I download in those folders, and every time I check the numbers just as a curiosity, but there still was a surprise or two. Notably, the OFMD folder compared to the Obikin folder, because I started reading OFMD fics literally less than a month ago (may 11 to be precise) but I've been reading Obikin fics for close to a year now. Also now that I'm thinking about it my numbers are wrong I know I put a gen fic in the Obikin folder and I didn't go back to put it in its proper folder yet, so it really is the same number of fics, which I wasn't expecting. I also keep thinking the Gravity Falls and Drarry folders are going to be bigger, but no, they're not (especially not the Drarry one, I stopped shipping that and reading fic for it years ago when I got into Snarry) Obviously this makes my OTPs clear, they're the ones I have more fics for (the Sherlock folder is mostly Johnlock and the OFMD one is mostly Blackbonnet, of course). I do find it funny I have more original smut fics than Tomarry and Harrymort combined, but that makes sense too. I gotta say, I have no idea what all the HP gen fics are, because that's a fandom I read mostly ship fics for and almost nothing else, so I don't know where those came from, as opposed to the SW ones (it's because I like fluffy Jedi bonding stuff). The Snarry folder wins - well, everything, but more specifically on top of having the most fics in it, I know without needing to check that it's the one with the most words in it, because it's the one with the most longfics in it: if you just count Pacify and Cambiare Podentes that's already a good million two hundred words, and then there's the fics I have doubles of, all the longfics...

By the way this is the wrong place to put it but I find it fascinating how different fandoms write different formats: I can give you like, 2-3 Obikin long chaptered fics, same with Kylux (most of which I didn't read because they weren't my style, sorry that one aviator Kylux and Lex Talionis I just can't) but for Johnlock or Snarry I could give you a list and still forget some I've read. I don't know if it's the size of the fandom or the age or something but that's fascinating. If that wasn't so long a process and it was useful, I'd write down all the fics I have, their titles and wordcount and fandom, that could be really interesting... but only for me because that would be pretty biased. I mean, I tend to gravitate towards longfics and that's the fics I'm more likely to download, so yeah.

Anyway I think that was a nice ramble, if someone read all this I love you, when's the marriage?

[consistentsquash]

5 Meta recs for Friday!

Happy Friday!!! <3 I read some really good meta on one of my fav author's writing process yesterday. So Meta Recs Friday! :D

My Writing Process by @squibstress

My name is Squibstress, and I am an unrepentant pantser.

This post is super poignant and really funny. It really shows fandom esp writing fic can be a lonely hobby and a social hobby at the same time. Also it's a super insightful look at not just the writing process because it's also about how the author thinks about the readers/reading experience.

I love, love, love the thoughtfulness Squibstress has for making reading more accessible. This is something you really only get in fandom. This extra attention to detail because it's a community and fandom is a garden <3 Personally I use a screen reader a lot and I can really tell the difference between fics which are going the extra mile for accessibiity on that.

Also TIL one of my fav authors is a pantser :D

Snarry-a-thon Recs by @danpuff-ao3

This is an incredible rec lists effort. Danpuff is making rec lists for Snarry-a-thon one of the longest running HP slash fests ever <3 Normally I don't have rec lists for meta posts but I feel this is such a brilliant meta level list. It's an amazing look at HP slash fandom evolution and also Snarry evolution. Insane levels of genres/tropes/characterization coverage! If you want to get a big picture Snarry fandom fic history this is the rec list for you!!

About Laugh and Forget (1) by @saehaerys

I am a big sucker for meta esp for fic meta for my fav fics. Laugh and Forget is a really dirtyhotbadwrong and super intense House of the Dragon/ASOIAF darkfic. PforPheobe's writing gives me serious Master and Margarita vibes because of that combo of darkness/humor/intense emotion. I have a Big Crush on their writing. Like I am not even a het incest reader but they sold me with their super dark emotional stories.

A bit under a year ago, one day in February, I had a horrible idea that Jaehaerys had coveted Saera and in his terrible covetousness he messed it all up, sending her away for cold repentance, and she fled from his face in mischief and utter disillusionment of their bond. It became increasingly unbearable for me to regard this passage of faux history.

I love fics written by authors with 100% commitment and love with their biggest Canon Feelings/Character Feelings inside it. This fic totally has that vibe. Really raw and super emotional.

The Lightning Struck Tower: “It is My Mercy, Not Yours That Matters Now” by @ashesandhackles

I really love the canon analysis meta from AshesandHackles. Honestly I am not a big reader of HP meta because it's a pretty old fandom and I feel like I don't really see a lot of value in meta at this point. But Ashesandhackles is brilliant at analysis and I feel like I just find new things to love about my fav characters and their parallels when I am reading their meta.

Harry recognises the flaw in the ending chapters of Deathly Hallows, and wins the Elder wand with an Expelliarmus too. Interestingly, it’s a spell Harry learnt by observing Snape in Duelling Club with Lockhart.

This one has incredible, incredible analysis of Snape, Harry and their relationships with Dumbledore. This is definitely not a shipping meta but I feel it's like 10x more powerful than a shipping meta because it just uses the canon to show the similarities/difference between the characters.

Re: Metrics by eldritcher

This is a funny and poignant personal post on writing stats/fandom stats.

Participating in fandom while refusing to buy into fandom's current metrics is a difficult position to take, because it's led to edgy questions now and then re: what keeps me in fandom since my metrics are pathetic (not my wording; my cousin deems anything below five-hundred kudos pathetic). 

Artists/authors have a lot of emotional connection with stats for lots of valid reasons. I feel bad when my fav authors are worried about stats but also I totally get it. Eldritcher is pretty idgaf about stats except comments because they love being super chatty and meta on comments. But also it's totally impossible to ignore other stats sometimes. The meta has an interesting point. If you are somebody who cares a lot about your progress, then you got to measure something. But like what's the right thing to measure?

[makeitp1nk]

PROCRASTINATE IN P1NK

Y’all I’m three weeks behind on hw so today I read a shitton of fic instead of catching up. I’ve been screaming about a couple of these throughout the day but I want to consolidated & attempt to form a coherent thought b/c I’ve been in all caps amazeface mode all day. Here it goes -- 

Unresting Death - Anon, Part of Blackcest Fest 

One of my favorite *themes* in *anything* is the inability to distinguish reality from fantasy. I *love* horror. I’m known to go to the theater to watch horror flicks by myself without issue, but throw me a Haunting @ Hill House Mind Fuck™️ and I won’t sleep for days. & psychologically fucked characters, ahem Hannibal, love them. The end of the this fic had me screaming. 

For Sale by Owner: Rose Weasley-Granger’s Virginity - @vukovich

This fic is part of FUCK HIS DAD fest. What’s funny is that it reminded me of that Bible verse -- “He is the stone which was rejected by you, the builders, but which became the chief corner stone.” Except it’s Rose and she fucked his dad. Watching her become the chief ass corner stone is glorious. Especially because she’s the thirstiest character you’ve ever read. The pining is also magnificent, as well as the characterizations of the extended family. Molly Weasley takes the cake, and the little ritual she shows Rose is just empowering as all hell. And don’t even get me started on the fabulous one-liners in this fic. Just go read it, kids.

The Best Kept Secrets - @danni-the-puff

I’ve screamed about this fic incoherently in three separate posts, so this is my attempt at being a sane person. I hate Hinny with a passion (no judgement if it’s your ship, it’s just not mine). Yet I read this Hinny because I figured it wasn’t endgame. Though the writing had me doubting it at times, the journey that the characters go through in the process to endgame Snarry is beautifully handled. There’s so much growth, and so many tough lessons learned that only *one* character gets to profit off of lol (well maybe two... ) Also, I don’t read cheating in fics, it hurts my little heart. But this fucking fic was incredible. The cheating wasn’t gratuitous, it was handled in a way where you condemn it but it’s not bitter/sour if that makes sense. It’s a sad face instead of a gut-punch, which is what infidelity usually feels like for me. Anywayyyyy the emotional complexity in this fic is next level. It has so much heart, and it’s hot as fuck. Looking back, my heart feels so good at having met these characters and how things turned out for them. You walk away having fallen in love with them all and happy with where they landed. Highly highly highly recommend.

Extra Credit - Other Things I Read This Week Because I Enjoy The Anxiety of Working On a Deadline, Apparently

After (I’ll Never Let You Go) - @famoustruth

I don’t usually read T or G fics 😉, but the premise pulled me in and I fell in love. The characterization is spot-on, it’s so well written you can *see* it and *feel* it. Overall, it’s sweet like candy and you’ll love it.

Keep Swinging Your Bat My Way - @veelawings

Dron Call Me Daddy Fest entry by Veelawings. Need I say more? I’ve been waiting for some sort of post to go around about this fic on Tumblr so I can scream about it but I haven’t seen it. So here I am, being the change I want to see in the world. This fic is fire. Ron is fire. It’s less than 1K of locker room sex perfection that is v much worth your time. 

Crawl Back Into Your Open Arms - @academicdisasterfic​

Grab the tissues, y’all. This fic resonated with me on a visceral level as someone who fell for “projects” back in the day. (I just cringed typing that sentence) So Part 5 was just gorgeous to me, I just *ached* for Draco. There’s this sentence where he says he’s a bad person when he’s in love, and I felt that deep in my bones. I knew Rooney would give me that happy ending but still bawled my eyes out when I got it. There’s so much heart in this fic, can’t recommend it enough.

Look at all the coherent sentences I wrote!!!!! If you read this far, high five!!!! I’m gonna go do my hw now 😘 maybe

[lumosatnight]

HP Rare Pair Fest Recs <3

The @hprarepairfest has ended for 2022 😢 and, oh goodness, was there some great fics. SO MANY great fics. Here are some of my favorites. You can check out the rest of the AO3 collection HERE.

Light & Fluffy (funny, feel-good, & sweet)

Unique Armature by @banana-ge-ge & brightened [Sirius Black/Severus Snape, E, 5.4k] ♥ You ever wanted a fic about mutual tattoos and boys being dumb? Well, look no further! Snark and banter and Sirius being Sirius. PLUS ART!

Summer Respite by @nightfalltwen [Hermione Granger/Viktor Krum, T, 5.6k] ♥ Hermione goes to visit Viktor in Bulgaria after the war. Great characters, great setting, and great fic overall!

Welcome to the Family by @danni-the-puff [Lucius Malfoy/Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger/Narcissa Malfoy, M, 4.6k] ♥ Draco's parents are swingers and Draco is about to find out in the most embarrassing way possible. Just 4k words of me snickering at Draco's dramatics.

Nicely Toasted (angst with fluff)

What would you like? by @orange-peony [Teddy Lupin/James Sirius Potter, E, 14.1] ♥ Explores Teddy's insecurities as a metamorphmagus and his hidden feelings for a certain roommate. Sweet and lonely and sexy, the perfect combo.

The Cost of Survival by @vdoshu [Barty Crouch Jr./Peter Pettigrew, M, 11.1k] ♥ A look into Peter's path to the Death Eaters through a relationship with Barty. Their relationship and characterization is just amazing! You really get to understand Peter's motivations, even if you don't agree with them.

Lovingly Named by @m0srael [Minerva McGonagall/Mrs. Norris, E, 11.9k] ♥ Mrs. Norris is actually a beautiful witch with a blood malediction. Story follows her relationship with Minerva and Minerva's quest to cure her. Gorgeous and moving with a HEA.

Slightly Charred (might make you cry but worth it)

Shades of Dawn by @corvuscrowned [Lavender Brown/Ginny Weasley, E, 2.6k] ♥ Werewolf!Lavender, bisexual!Ginny, hot smut, and well-written angst. A beautiful read with such heart-wrenching imagery that you'll feel like you're in the middle of it all.

Faintly Touched, Just Breathed on By Light by mouldy_voldy [Hermione Granger/Theodore Nott, M, 15.8k] ♥ Secret relationships, sixth year, angst and tragedy. A stunning look at a budding relationship and then watching it all fall apart. Definitely a tear-jerker, but so good. (Warnings: MCD, grief/mourning)

Flaming Hot 🔥🔥🔥 (gonna make you sweat 🥵)

Take Me, Big Daddy by @greenmegsnoham [Rubeus Hagrid/Gilderoy Lockhart, E, 4.1k] ♥ Gilderoy just wants some big dick and Hagrid happens to have just that. Gilderoy's flirting and the sex, OH MY GOD. Size kink, daddy kink, shame kink. *passes out from overheating* (Warnings: VERY rough sex)

Our Love (He's a Changed Man) by @maraudersaffair [Harry Potter/Severus Snape/Percy Weasley, E, 3.6k] ♥ Snarry as Hogwarts Professors in an established relationship. They want to bring Percy into the fold and it's as hot as it sounds while also being surprisingly sweet. As in it's HOT AS HELL.

Note: click to expand for the darker fics with possibly triggering content

Burnt Beyond Repair (proceed with caution 👀)

An O in Potions by @diandrastrikesback [Gilderoy Lockhart/Severus Snape, E, 2.6k] ♥ Gilderoy wants an O and Professor Snape is going to give it to him. This is just so in character for Gilderoy. A creepy, sexy, hilarious read. (Warnings: Rape/non-con elements, memory alteration, blackmailing)

Note: and because I STILL can't help myself, here's my fic for the fest! I'm really proud of this one!! It might make you cry though, so be warned.

Self-Rec (by me @lumosatnight | lumosatnight)

Your Cigarette Smell [Sirius Black/Narcissa Malfoy, E, 9.7k] ♥ Sirius and Narcissa slide into an intensely sexual relationship soon after Sirius leaves Hogwarts. But what is the cost of love in the middle of a growing war? Angst and porn. (Warnings: rough sex, infidelity, MCD)

[fanficmaverickpodcast]

10,000 points to @consistentsquash for being the first person to bring this to my attention OMG! I'm gonna go ahead and leave that typo there because it's so damn funny. I'm laughing so hard right now because Snape The Nightcracker sounds like the comic book caped crusader of my dreams. I'm gonna need one of ya'll to write a fic about that STAT please. Can his cape be blue? Please?

For the uninitiated, please note that Perverse_Idyll and Rinsbane's delightful Snarry fic is actually and properly called 'The Nutcracker's Delight.'

My bad, ya'll! Keep on rollin'!

The latest episode of The FanFic Maverick podcast is out! The show is available through the link above and also on Apple Podcast, Google Podcast, Spotify, and iHeartRadio.

ChaosBlue and @danpuff-ao3 combine forces in this episode and let loose on all things Snarry, including reviews on two holiday themed Snarry fics: 'The Nutcracker's Delight' and 'The Christmas Prince.'

Link to 'The Nightcracker's Delight' is here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/517881

Link to 'The Christmas Prince' is here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27780880

I'll be taking a break from episode drops for the rest of December, but FFM will be back in January of 2023. See ya then!

[hp-fanfic-archive]

an introductory rec list (that no one asked for) to some of my favorite ships: snarry [5/10]

First fic I read for the pairing: Because I Love You, You Idiot by TheMightyFlynn [115k,E] Veela!Fic. Both Snape and Harry have Veela blood and are bonded. From Snape's POV as he tries to work out why Harry isn't reacting the way he should be to their bond. [stumbled onto this fic while looking for other creature fics when i was first really getting into hp fanfic and it does kinda slap, i’ll be honest. it also intrigued me into not immediately skipping over snarry fics when i saw them and now… well… the pairing is a fav.]

Fic that really sold me on the pairing: Immortal Claim by ladyofsilverdawn [16k,E] Harry needs Snape's cooperation to solve a case, but navigating vampiric culture and Snape's powerful allure proves more challenging than he anticipates. [artist!sev and vampire!sev??? sign me the fuck up. that and the excellent writing and the tension between harry and sev make for an excellent fic which really hooked me on the ship.]

Absolute favorite fic(s) for the pairing: The Fifth Act by oliver.snape [111k,M] After coming to an understanding during the Horcrux hunt, Snape and Harry spend the next year reclaiming what they never had in their lives while playing their roles in the war. HP/SS though not rushed , with a happy ending with some humour throughout. [not only is this fic extremely well-written but it’s funny as hell. the plot is interesting and the concept of severus and harry ending up as housemates after the war is iconic. 11/10] Double-Sided Coin by thecookiemomma [62k,E] Another prophecy throws Harry into a relationship he never would have picked for himself. (warning for underage) [this is one of my favorite fics like ever. bonding fic with a side of magical theory, terms of endearment, a little bit non-traditional soulmate elements, interesting plot elements, it’s all there. i’ve read this fic literally more times than possibly any other fic.] The Worst Cook in Essex by Snarry5evr [6k,T] Harry loves to cook. Severus doesn’t think he’s all that great at it. [this fic is absolutely hilarious and i live for it. the domesticity, harry’s entire plan, their relationship, it’s all so well written and also hilarious but not in an excessive crack kind of way.]

Most recent fic I’ve read for the pairing: Dead Man's Bones by Lilredwulfe [5k,M] Harry wakes one day to find his magic has changed. He seeks help at Hogwarts, but quickly comes to the realization something is amiss. [i’ve read my fair share of creature fics and this one is a little unusual and i like that. i also liked the writing style a lot.]

Favorite AU(s) I’ve read for the pairing: Very Canon Divergent + Roadtrip AU: Dance In The Dark Of Night by Kaatje [112k,M] An undercover mission leads to love, life and the defeat of the Dark Lord. Road Movie set in Scotland following graduation. Inspired by The Lord Of The Rings. (warnings for: suicidal thoughts, previous rape/non-con, graphic depictions of violence, self-harm, child abuse) [it’s very au (i think it had been written before the hp series was finished) but it’s very very good and i love the concept so much.]

WIP(s) I really love for the pairing: Evernight by LilRinnieB [318k,E] It's Harry's seventh year at Hogwarts and the new strategy in the war against Voldemort is "Fight darkness with darkness." Harry goes through a series of changes that has him questioning everything he thought he ever knew about magic, darkness, destiny ... and a certain snarky Potions professor. 

[oh my god the plot in this is so intricate and well-written and i adore all the OCs and the relationships are well-written and the dynamics and progressions are perfect and i have truly never been sadder to see a fic unfinished (BUT that hasn’t stopped me from reading it several times).]

Longest fic I’ve read for the pairing: Evernight by LilRinnieB [318k,E] (WIP) It's Harry's seventh year at Hogwarts and the new strategy in the war against Voldemort is "Fight darkness with darkness." Harry goes through a series of changes that has him questioning everything he thought he ever knew about magic, darkness, destiny ... and a certain snarky Potions professor. 

Fic(s) with some of my favorite tropes: Soulmates: This Fever Called Living by KiroAngel [3k,G] Severus was never lucky in love or, really, lucky in any capacity. When his lack of luck follows him around in the form of the of an outlined Soul Mark, well, at least luck decides to keep it interesting. And maybe, just maybe, his luck will one day polarize. [it’s a little bit introspective and i love the writing style.] Bed Sharing: Heatwave by DobbyRocksSocks  [1k,T] A heatwave has hit Scotland, and Professor Potter can't sleep because of the temperature. Can Headmaster Snape help? [first of all, so much of DobbyRocksSocks’s stuff is adorable. Second of all, love me some cute get together and bed sharing.]

[p-and-p-admin]

Interview given to The Severus Snape and Hermione Granger Shipping Fan Group.  (sharing here Admin approved)

https://www.facebook.com/groups/199718373383293/

Hello Oracle Obscured and welcome to Behind the Quill, thank-you for letting us get to know you a little better.

Many readers will know you already and if they don’t I encourage them to look your works up including Teaching Miss Granger and How I learned to love teachers’ meetings

Okay, let’s jump right in.

What's the story behind your pen name?

Hmmm ... that’s kind of a weird answer for me. I wanted to choose a name that didn’t immediately indicate whether I was male or female. I’d noticed a certain freedom afforded to authors of indistinguishable gender. With no societal construct about the “nature” of the creator, the story stood on its own, without prejudice or conditioned expectations.

I brainstormed about six or seven names and then picked the one that appealed to me most. I’ve always felt drawn to the idea of oracles (those who see beyond). And I definitely felt obscured in that department. (Hell, at the time, my whole life felt obscured.)

Which Harry Potter character do you identify with the most?

I don’t know if I do. I guess if I had to pick, I’d say Hermione, as I have a tendency to be an obsessive perfectionist when it comes to work/studying. I like to be organized and plan things out. And I can be quite demanding and harsh with myself when I feel like I’m not measuring up to my own insane ideals.

But I took that openpsychometrics.org statistical quiz a while back, where you answer like a bazillion comparison questions (I did the longer version), and my highest HP match was Remus Lupin (83%). Yeah, I can see that.

Luna is my favorite character, but I don’t know if I identify with her more than anyone else.

Do you have a favourite genre to read? (not in fic, just in general)

It used to be horror/suspense, but ... I don’t know ... I’m just not as into it anymore. Maybe it’s because the real world is horrifying enough without adding fictional monsters to the mix.

Now I mostly read classics.

Do you have a favourite "classic" novel?

To Kill a Mockingbird.

At what age did you start writing?

Just writing stories in general? Maybe second grade. It wasn’t a passion or anything, just something I was pretty good at. I only really did it at school, though, not so much at home. I read A LOT growing up, so I naturally imagined that I might be an author one day. I tried to write a book when I was about 13 or 14, but less than one chapter in, I decided it was too hard. (I was NOT a Hermione growing up. Planning and perseverance were not my style.)

I took a massive break from thinking after high school (the smorgasbord of medications I was on didn’t like me using my brain too much, and my plans for college went out the window when my depression become unmanageable). I didn’t really start writing again until I was about twenty-seven. That was when I found fanfiction. I consider that when I really started writing.

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

I found fanfiction while looking for erotica. Needless to say I discovered the motherlode, and I was hooked. Over the years, I’d written bits and pieces of my own sexy scenarios (which is what you do when you grow up without the internet and you have to depend on your imagination for all your kink requirements), but I’d never really thought about taking someone else’s “story world” and using it as my setting. For a little over a year I read/devoured all the HP fanfiction I could, and then I realized I could take all the fantasies in my head and play them out with my favorite characters.

The first story I wrote was a funny/smutty Ginny/Draco thing, and it was HORRIBLE. The story and the sex were fine, but the writing was a nightmare. I submitted it to The Restricted Section, which was the only site I knew at the time, and they vetted their stories, so I had to get approved. They wrote me back saying it needed work and I should get a beta. So I went on the forum and found one (which was rather brave of me now that I think back). The person who helped me must’ve had the patience of a saint, because he/she(?) never said a damn thing about all the mistakes and shitty-ness. Suggestions and corrections were made, and I changed some of the pronouns to names so it wouldn’t sound so repetitive. The next time I submitted it, they accepted, and I got a decent response for a first-time writer (like three or four nice reviews). No one seemed to hate it, and the reviewers said the sex was hot, so I tried again, hoping to do better.

That’s when I wrote the first chapter of Teaching Miss Granger. It started out as just a oneshot. And it got a much better response. I wanted to write more, but I became extremely depressed and lethargic, and I didn’t really do anything for the next six or seven years. (I mean nothing. Unless you consider watching every episode of Law & Order CI and SVU ten times over to be an accomplishment.)

I came back to it years later, intending to add a few chapters to TMG where they have sex, but ... it just sort of evolved into the monster that it is. I worked on it pretty much every day for about a year. I’d never stuck with ANYTHING that long in my entire life.

What's the best theme you've ever come across in a fic? Is it a theme represented in your own works?

I would say love or “the power of love” is probably my favorite theme. But that includes synonyms for love as well. (Like wholeness, which is the theme of Quartet.)

What fandoms are you involved in other than Harry Potter?

None. I like other fandoms, but I don’t write for them, and I don’t usually read their fanfiction.

If you could make one change to canon, what would it be? Do you have a favourite piece of fanon?

I’ve never really thought about changing cannon. I mean, I change it to suit my fictional purposes (like Snape lives etc.), but I wouldn’t want to change canon for real. The deaths in HP serve a purpose, and while I find many of those deaths heartbreaking, that’s kind of the point. Hatred is bleak and destructive, and good people don’t survive wars simply because they’re good; bad things happen to good people all the time. As for changing something about the individual characters, I can’t get behind that either. The reasons people do things are multifaceted and complex and they’re colored by a lifetime of experiences I will never know or understand, so I don’t feel I can really judge. I can’t say I understand all the choices I’ve made in my own life, and there’ve been plenty of times where I had no choice at all. I can’t hold others to more rigorous standards than I myself can meet. We all have our shortcomings. (And that’s cool. Without them, there would be no growth or diversity.)

Do I have a favorite piece of fanon? Hmmm ... probably Head Boy and Head girl rooming together or having private rooms.

Oh! And uniforms.

Do you listen to music when you write or do you prefer quiet?

I used to listen to really quiet classical music while wearing headphones. Every little sound in the house distracts me, and I have to block it out. But lately I’ve just been running this old box fan that drowns out the noise.

What are your favourite fanfictions of all time?

Crap, I don’t know if I can choose. (Plus I feel like I’ve forgotten a lot of what I’ve read.)

My friend Desert Sea is my fav Hermione/Severus writer. Out of her stories, the ones I like best are In Their Hands and At the Headmaster’s Discretion.

After a brief search of my accounts, I’ll go with:

Do Not Go Gentle by senlinyu

Another Dream by dragoon811

The Last Twenty-Four Hours of Severus Snape by CryingCinderella

Pretty much everything by Aurette

Pet Project by Caeria

Post Tenebras, Lux by Loten

All the SS/HG stuff from snapeslittleblackbuttons

There’s a Teddy Radiator story that I like a lot, but I can’t remember the name of it. (Or what it’s about.) (Yes, very helpful, I know.)

And in a category all it’s own is Farmer Granger and the Most Glorious Cock by MyWitch. (Seriously, I read this like once a month and it makes me laugh every time.)

I read a lot of Drarry too. Drarry stories I love:

Everything by bixgrl1, but especially Balance Imperfect and In Evidence of Magical Theory

Everything by lq_traintracks (even the non-Drarry stuff). The writing is amazing.

I love all the advent stories by Saras_girl.

I like all the Drarry stories I’ve read by Faithwood.

I really like RZZMG’s writing. (No particular story or pairing.)

And I just rediscovered a story I found in 2007 (the first m/m fic I ever read). It’s a Snarry, which I know isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but it was excellent. Snape: the Home Fries Nazi by pir8fancier

Are you a plotter or a pantser? How does that affect your writing process?

I enjoy a bit of both. My oneshots are all pantsed. TMG was totally pantsed. But Getting Personal and Quartet were both plotted and planned. For GP I did sort of a chapter by chapter synopsis before starting my rough draft, and for Q I went into even more detail—EVERYTHING was planned out ahead of time. The only thing that changed during the first draft was I ended up combining some of the chapters.

How does plotting affect my writing process compared to pantsing? It streamlines it. In a oneshot there’s not much to streamline; the basic story (or general idea) is all you really need. There’s not enough story to get muddled. But when I’m writing something longer, with multiple chapters, I find it’s better to know where the story is going. How deeply I go into that planning can vary. Sometimes there’s just a basic outline of the major plot points and then I fly by the seat of my pants from there. Sometimes I write out a very rough synopsis (sort of like a short and loose first draft) and then start writing as if it’s my second draft. Things inevitably get changed once I really start writing, so the planning isn’t set in stone by any means, but when I plan, the story goes in the general direction I intend without veering too far off course and there aren’t any plot holes. After I wrote TMG (with no planning) I saw that there was A LOT I could have cut or combined without affecting anything important. I learned a little more with each story I wrote, and when I got to Q, there was a lot of complicated ideas that I wanted to incorporate, and there were so many characters (and character arcs) going on that I had to plan extensively to make sure everything fit together. If I hadn’t worked it out ahead of time, it would’ve been like throwing a heap of puzzle pieces on the table but not being given a reference picture to know what it was I was working toward.

What is your writing genre of choice?

I have no idea. Plotty sex? Erotic dramady? Some of it is just straight up PWP, but I usually like to have something meaningful in there too.

Which of your stories are you most proud of? Why?

Usually the answer is whatever I’ve most recently written, as it’s the most likely to represent my current “best.” In terms of writing, I’ll go with A Brush with Magic, but Quartet is probably my best storytelling. A lot went into that (symbolism, planning, obsessive re-writes) and it holds a good deal of personal meaning to me. So, I guess I’ll go with Q due to the time and effort involved.

Did it unfold as you imagined it or did you find the unexpected cropped up as you wrote? What did you learn from writing it?

The unexpected always crops up (even with all my planning), and it’s the unexpected that makes the magic.

While I had many insights into my own nature while writing Quartet, in the end I think it taught me to trust/listen to myself more.

Later, however, it brought me a very different message. While writing it, I felt a lot of tension and anxiety; I wanted to “do it right” and present my story in the best light. But after some time away, I realized I’d been so worried because I felt as if that story represented me, as if it defined me. And the pressure of being judged worthy or unworthy had been eating me alive.

But I don’t feel that way anymore. Now it’s like I wrote all my stories in another lifetime. While they all might be a snapshot of a fraction of my mind, nothing I create ever says a damn thing about who or what I truly am. Since letting go of that, I’ve found a sense of freedom around writing. I still like to express things as clearly and beautifully as I can, but it’s more a celebration of words than a search for acceptance.

How personal is the story to you, and do you think that made it harder or easier to write?

Quartet was extremely personal to me when I wrote it, and in a lot of ways I think that made it easier to write. When I have to go strictly by imagination, I feel as if I’m missing some depth of understanding (like I’m getting the surface-level stuff, but missing the nuance). When I write from experience, it has an entirely different quality. Richer. More intimate. It’s work to write what I don’t know, but it’s easy to write the truth.

Posting, however, is an entirely different story. Other people don’t always want the truth, and if you feel like your story is an extension of you, it can hurt to have any part of it rejected.

What books or authors have influenced you? How do you think that shows in your writing?

I think everything I’ve ever read or seen has influenced me. In terms of writing, I guess I’d say I’m inspired by beauty in all its forms. When I first started reading fanfiction, I just searched for the kinks I liked; it was all about the sex (with bonus points for having a decent plot). Then one day I read an extremely well-written PWP (I don’t remember what), and the way the author described the sex was so unlike anything I had ever read, it totally blew my mind. It was art. Exquisite art. And before that, I didn’t know sex could be art. That author didn’t just recount the characters’ actions, they painted a word masterpiece—they turned porn into poetry. THAT was what I wanted in my life. And I didn’t know it until that moment.

Books/authors that stick with me:

The Harry Potter series (obviously).

Shel Silverstein (Love the poetry, but The Giving Tree is one of my favorite books of all time.)

Dr. Seuss (Always.)

Judy Blume (I still have my copy of Are You There God it’s Me Margaret from when I was, like, 10. Tiger Eyes is my favorite of hers.)

R.L. Stine (I got hooked prior to the creation of the Goosebumps series, but I had EVERY Fear Street Book he wrote when I was in middle school.)

Weekend by Christopher Pike (This was the first YA thriller I ever read. *Sigh* memories. I still have my original copy, and I still read it every once in a while. The characters and plot are great.)

Stephen King (Carrie is my fav.)

Anne Rice (I’ve read all the vampire and witch books, but The Witching Hour is the only one I’ve read multiple times. Blackwood Farm is my next favorite.)

To Kill a Mockingbird

Charles Dickens (David Copperfield is my fav.)

Jane Austen (I can’t pick between Pride & Prejudice and Sense & Sensibility.)

Thomas Harris (Brilliant writing, and Hannibal might be one of the most intriguing anti-heros ever.)

Stieg Larsson (Another brilliant writer with a brilliant character.)

The Giver by Lois Lowry (I haven’t read the rest of the trilogy. And I haven’t seen the movie. I refuse to besmirch my childhood love with Hollywood’s interpretation.)

Bridge to Terabithia (This book devastated me as a child.)

Gillian Flynn (Sharp Objects is my fav.)

Liane Moriarty (I like all of her books, especially Big Little Lies. The way she plays with the timeline is masterful.)

Frank Herbert’s Dune. (I grew up on this. It’s my dad’s all-time favorite book. And, yes, we’re looking forward to the new movie.)

Margaret Atwood (The Handmaid’s Tale is horrifyingly wonderful. And Atwood herself is fascinating. Watch her Masterclass if you get the chance.)

Steinbeck’s East of Eden (This might be my second favorite book.)

The Lucifer Effect by Phillip Zimbardo (This isn’t fiction, but it was the first book that really affected the way I see the world.)

Eisler’s The Chalice and the Blade (Also not fiction. If you’re interested in the divine feminine and a more egalitarian society, this is the book for you.)

Loving What Is by Byron Katie (The only self-help book that’s ever actually helped me.)

Daphne Du Maurier (I love Rebecca, but she also has a story called “The Blue Lenses” that isn’t really intended to be scary, but it freaked me the fuck out.)

The Secret History by Donna Tartt (Gorgeous writing, and the plot left me seriously disturbed.)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey (Gah! I love this. The writing and the story and the characters and EVERYTHING!)

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury (I Bradbury’s writing style, but the plot of F451 is pure horror for any book hoarder lover.)

The Lord of the Flies by William Golding (This might be my third favorite book ever. No, wait, I might like it better than East of Eden. I can’t choose!)

The Diary of Anne Frank (How in the hell could anyone read this and not be affected by it?)

Do people in your everyday life know you write fanfiction?

No. This is my own private world, and I like it that way.

How true for you is the notion of "writing for yourself"?

Very. I write what I want to read. There are certain adjustments I make when I write for other people as opposed to what I do when writing strictly for myself, but nothing major. I refuse to write things I have no interest in, and I don’t write to make people happy. I write to please myself. (But it’s nice when what pleases me pleases others. It’s wonderful to share that connection.)

How important is it for you to interact with your audience? How do you engage with them? Just at the point of publishing? Through social media?

I like hearing from my readers. I don’t have a lot of time to interact, but I like talking to my audience and listening to their insights. I try to reply to all the comments I get on AO3 (it’s just too hard on FFN). And when I have free time (which isn’t often) I check my FB groups to see what’s going on. To me, the interaction kind of completes the creative cycle; it helps me set the story free and allow it to be. It really belongs to the reader once I’ve published, and it’s nice to see the ripples creativity creates.

What is the best advice you've received about writing?

Unless it’s absolutely necessary, stop using the word “was.” Completely changed my writing.

What do you do when you hit writer's block?

It doesn’t really happen that much, as I usually know where I’m going with my story, but there can be glitches between scenes or times when I can’t find the words for something (like ending a chapter). When that happens, I usually just leave it and come back later—I can’t force it if it won’t come.

If I really need to get it done for some reason, I read what I have over and over, adding a little bit more each time, trying out words that “sound right” and building what I need bit by bit. What I come up with isn’t always right or what I want, but at least I have something to work with. Sometimes seeing what’s wrong makes what you want more obvious.

Has anything in real life trickled down into your writing?

Yeah, just about everything Sex, depression, anxiety, personal growth, likes/dislikes, insights, interests, philosophy, all my little neuroses. Every once in a while I’ll even include some dialogue from real life.

Do you have any stories in the works? Can you give us a teaser?

I’m juggling about five long stories right now (plus a couple oneshots). And I haven’t worked on any of them in ages. I don’t know what’s going on with me; I’m just not in the mood. I don’t want to say what they are, as I might never finish them. (Two are Drarry and three are Sevmione. One is a compilation of oneshots. Four of them are completely planned out and just need to be written. The unplanned Drarry was always just meant to be for myself and I doubt I’ll ever release it.)

Any words of encouragement to other writers?

Yes. Enjoy the whole writing/creative process as much as possible. Try not to beat yourself up, and don’t try to force yourself to be better. You will naturally get better the more you write. Change is inevitable; allow it to happen. Read books about writing, and read good writers. Notice what brings you the most pleasure when you read and tap into that same pleasure when you write. Play with words and ideas just for fun. Watch and see what appears. There is no perfect.

If you’re writing about sex (because I get asked about that a lot), write what turns YOU on. Don’t try to be sexy. Don’t try to write what you think other people want to hear. Don’t worry about what other people think (at least in the first draft). If they don’t like it they can go read something else. But if YOU like it, it will shine through in your writing, and that will have a bigger impact on your reader than any activity you describe. Also, the physicality is only a fraction of the sexual experience. Don’t turn your sex scenes into a play-by-play. You’re not really writing about what the characters are doing so much as how what they’re doing affects them. It’s a personal experience, and the more personal you make it (the more honest and vulnerable you are as a writer) the more satisfying the story will be for your reader. Wise words! Thank-you so much for speaking with us today Oracle Obscured.