#because she's the emotional centre
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omw to play emotional support for my mom disguised as ✨fun family bonding time✨ for the rest of the week <3333 there's something so deeply wrong with me uwu teehee
#and i still havent texted my friend back even tho she texted me a week ago and i told her ill text her back this week when i have the time#and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again#have to pretend im not at the very brink of a serious mental and emotional breakdown. is making me lose my fucking mind#ik she's having a bad time rn and she needs the reassurance and jesus fucking christ i tried i had two long conversations with her#that were allllll about her. only her. not a single word about me. that's fine. this is what people need in such moments right#to just get patted on the head and hugged and told their suffering is real and what happened to them is unfair and just made to feel#that for a moment they're the centre of attention and it is all about them. this is normal. this is why therapy exists.#so i try to give this to her but it is fucking draining. and i NEVER get the same treatment back. like she caught me crying at uni last week#and like yes she'll say some nice things but she'll always find a way to turn the conversation back on the topic of ✨her✨#like we started talking about my therapy and i finally got to actually say a word or two about what im dealing with. but then she goes#'yeah im just trying to figure out what's wrong with me when i listen to you haha like i could never cut myself cause it looks ugly.#ofc it doesnt look ugly on you haha but i could never lol'#like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like#i spent over an hour a few days back sitting with you and listening to your talk about your childhood and validating you and not saying#a word a single fucking word about myself even tho i was also going through it myself but who cares right. and now im the bad guy again#because im not texting back.#i feel like im finally fucking snapping cause at this point im properly fucking angry. IM having a bad time too. IM going through it too.#I have bad coping skills and had a fucked up childhood and traumas in my life TOO and im allowed to just not be able to handle it#i really wanna break something lol maybe therapy's working after all lmao#oh also this is why i dont eat breakfast. i do it once and then feel guilty and suicidal lol normal behaviour#pojebie mnie zaraz przysięgam na boga mam dość kurwa BASTA
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i’ve been personality-typing op characters just to get a rough framework for how i understand the way they think & conceptualize things & why before doing like real character analysis after a reread. i’ve also been using personality database as a dartboard & i have many disagreements.
controversial opinions in the tag for those interested lol.
#for context i don’t really buy into this stuff like it’s not my thing outside of using it as a creative tool#it’s similar to astrology in that it’s fun & like no hate to people who use it it’s just a bit boxy for my taste when applied as like.#a genuine scientific theory about human behaviour. so i’m new to this.#that said they’re wrong WRONG I TELL YOU!#first & foremost neither vivi nor koala are enneagram 2 you’re just a misogynist.#vivi is the most 9w1 to 9w1 you just see a woman who doesn’t like violence & assign her passivity & a need for love at the center of her#character when that is not the case!#& the whole point of Koala’s arc is that she no longer feels the need to hide her emotions or people please to be accepted! she isn’t chasi#that! she is a type 1 fuck the entire world her entire life is centred around her desire to free the fishmen as a revolutionary ideologue.#jinbe 🤝 koala 1w9#also sabo is Entp 8w7 & i will not explain. this man gives no fucks about security HOW IS HE A SIX#his entire thing is literally about autonomy & thus control. he shows no ongoing need to find or even necessarily build security.#he’s concerned with the ability of the people (& himself!! reread his backstory please!!!) to control their own lives & live with complete#agency. like okay if ace is the part of luffy that doesn’t want to be alone sabo is the part that wants to be free. you get it?#speaking of ace isfp ftw. just because he’s cool thoughtful & occasionally strategic doesn’t mean he’s entx or xntp. please rexamine.#as the singular correct commenter on his page said his fi LITERALLY got him killed.#i’m lowkey a little iffy on whether he’s a 6 or a 2 but i’m right about the briggs test.#also ace is very ichigo kurosaki coded
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hey god if you've created someone for me can you introduce me to them sooner? i kinda need them now
#like i know i know im sad and hurt but in my heart even the worst breakup friendship or otherwise can kill my hope#like i know this is gods plan for me this is my arc but god it's getting worse and harder everyday#i thought nothing could be worse than yesterday but i hadn't lived today them#then*#i need to talk to someone so bad oh god sl yesterday i had the exam right#and like i don't even know what happened i thought i was going to fail even after giving my 2000% studying#for like 10 hours a day for 15 days for this one exam#and i was panicking and shivering so bad that my heart felt like it would fly out of my chest it was beating so hard#and so fast it didn't even beat like that when i climb too many stairs#and i tried to deep breathe but nothing worked it was so scary like yeah i get stressed sometimes#but this was another level so scary i was nauseous too#and then i clicked submit and i got 82!!!#when i was so sure i was gonna fail because i was only sure about 54 marks answers and the passing was 50#and i got really happy and relieved and then i realized. oh. i don't have anyone to tell#like yeah i told my dad and he was like oh cool ofcourse you did very good#because he doesn't GET it that im not smart anymore and 10th cbse is not an accurate measure of intelligence#he wasn't even happy or surprised he was like well nice obviously#and that's it. i didn't have anyone else to tell#granted i hadn't even told anyone i was giving the exam. i mean i say anyone as if im swimming in friends#only have one. two if u stretch. and i didn't say. cause like idk doesn't really seems like anyone cares#and aah stupid emotional me before the exam i was feeling sad and trying not to panic (??? why??) and CRY in the car because i was thinking#that how my mom always drops me to exam centres and we talk i play music and when im getting out she says all the best beta#and the beta. wow i typed this and immediately have tears in my eyes now. i don't even understand why but#idk i made it up to be a little tradition in my head and i really wanted to call my mom and say mom pls can u say all the best#to me now bc i think ill fuck it up and im really scared and maybe if u give your blessing it'd be okay. but then i thought how embarrassin#it wld be if i failed. bc we don't have any kind of rship my mom and me. and then when she heard i passed from dad she didn't even call me#or anything. thank god i didn't do all that drama but fucking hell. this is all just for me right nobody cares not my parents#and it's too difficult im crumbling under the pressuee but i have to grit my teeth and do it or ill never be able to get out of this house#and i know ill find people when i do get out. but in the meantime. please god ji just one person idc who girl boy friend or love ANYONE#ik it's weak & ik i shld be enough on my own. but pls i just CAN'T.they dont even have to put up with me they just have to care a bit
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ceasing all luke castellan arguments by pointing out rick was inconsistent while writing him and i 100% believe he forgot luke was like 22 when he died
#REFUSE to believe he woukd have had annabeth and grover killed in som#okay maybe grover but not annabeth#rick severely underutilised the broken trio. and i sat this despite them being basically the centre of the series' climax#well. annabeth and luke at least. BECAUSE RICKY DROPPED A STATUE ON THALIA#i get it we're stuck in percy's head and that limits the perspective#pero por el amor the dios. the broken trio could have been So Much More#luke could have been so much more#annabeth is already the emotional centre of the series. but she barely has a relationship with thalia and luke.... well#rick can't pick between cartoonishly evil luke and misunderstood hero luke#and maybe it's percy's pov. but sigh#pjo#luke castellan#IF ANYONE STARTS DRAMA IN MY NOTES I'M BLOCKING YOU#.txt
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kozue changing deepness' choreography to centre tsuzuri as a self fulfilling prophecy. intentionally diminishing her own role and admitting defeat that no matter all of her effort she still could not lessen the gap between them such that if they were to share the spotlight equally it would hinder them. that she was a hindrance. and then making it to nationals using that formation that she had decided upon only last minute confirming her belief that it was Due to the attention she forced upon tsuzuri, that it was the correct decision to make because it worked, and that she was essentially a non factor. tsuzuri would have made it anyway, because shes a genius. but kozue doesnt Know if the original formation would have been enough because she was too scared to try. they had to break up after this because the decision went against both of their wishes: tsuzuri's to be a school idol, that is, to create art With somebody, and kozue's to win love live on her own merits
#like if they had competed at nationals and won using the tsuzuri centre choreography it would have been a hollow victory for kozue#she didnt earn it. her efforts had no impact on the result. the relationship wasnt working for either of them so they had to withdraw#gemitus#kozue is simultaneously drawn towards tsuzuri because of her talent but is jealous that its so effortless.#and i think the conflicting emotions eat her up
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All she really needs to do is smirk at him and he's just done. Done with everything. He is Regency era Jon Snow.
Honest question, I've been rethinking the whole "Colin has done the same with Penelope Featherington" speech Anthony gave to Daphne and his mother in season 1 and the fact that when Colin talked to his brothers in 3x05 both Ben and Anthony were ilke "I didn't have a clue" and like... do we think Anthony spent the evening rethinking every single interaction he has ever witnessed between Colin and Pen and every single instance where he let things slide because "oh that's just eloise's friend?" and just banging his head against a wall as Kate laughs her ass off??
#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington#colin x penelope#polin#anthony bridgerton#do we think he just goes#what the fuck was THAT colin?#everytime he is presented with evidence that Colin has been flaunting propriety with Pen?#and he's like#I SHOULD HAVE MADE YOU MARRY HER THREE YEARS AGO!#and do we think he despairs his own blindness?#he must be grateful Pen is lady whistledown because if it were anyone else...#the amount of scandals those two would have been at the centre of#improprer letter writing and all#when he asked “Did you compromise the young lady?”#the lady in question was penelope#not marina#kathani sharma#kanthony#married life#she only has to smirk no laugh needed#anthony bridgerton is the ultimate blind to emotions boy#jon snow#jonathan bailey#simone ashley
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I don’t feel like a whole person when I’m at work. Just not being able to speak and respond freely is so draining. Or taking abuse or low key agitation from the people I work for/with. This job does not suit me all that well, even if I’m good at it.
#side note#I’m so proud I had enough spoons to run errands after work#I pretty much never do#I even folded some laundry when I got home#I’ve kind of crashed now though#experiencing emotional crash too which sucks#today the person I worked with saw me put on a mask when we entered the shppping centre#and she proceeded to complain the entire time we were there and asked me to remove it like five times#and told me I looked funny (bad) like four times#and said so much shit to try and convince me to take it up#and I just had to suck it up because I was working with her#until I had enough and politely said that I’d prefer not to talk about masks anymore#and then she Kept going#like I’m fine but it’s just an example of lowkey agitation I have to deal with#yesterday I got yelled at for being five minutes late cause of parking#and though she apologised afterwards those moments really do add up#and I have several long back to back shifts without a chance to destress between them#this weekend is high fare which always ALWAYS exacerbates my pain#yeah I don’t feel like a person with my own agency#whilst I support other people to have their own agency#isn’t that silly
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↳ Index [Day 31 - Werewolves]
Pairing: Alpha Dom!Jungkook x f. Omega sub!Reader
Genre: childhood best friends to enemies to lovers!AU, werewolf!AU
Warnings: Kook is kinda cold at first, it is implied that OC gets sold into a forced marriage where she will be tortured and assaulted (not to Kook but a villain character hahaha), yeah...her future is not looking good, or is it?, Koo might have a plan :----)
Kinks: the trope of "just the tip" and "we shouldn't be doing this", yeah besties i went there, sex in a shed in the forest, sex by the bonfire, nudity, naked cuddling for warmth *wink wink*, he is bigger and stronger than her, size & muscle & strength kink, he pins her down, fuck i'm literally so small when it comes to him like bro please i have so many thots, hahah sorry i'm really into him haahah, he pins her wrists & puts his hand over her mouth to silence her, huge werwolf dick, knotting, multiple orgasms for both, "just the tip" in spooning position, clit massages, rough penetrative sex in pronebone & doggy style, he has her in a headlock at one point, breeding for the sake of scent marking her, so much fucking cum oh lord, dirty talk, he has fangs, he bites her shoulder, he growls, what if i was weak?? what then??, tears, eye contact, this is emotional & has plot and i wanna write more about them, cuddly & safe aftercare, the plot in this is so good omfg
Wordcount: 11.5k
a/n: Click here if you wanna see his dick. I have zero (0) Z E R O knowledge of the workings of the omegaverse. i know that there’s alphas and betas and omegas but that’s it. and that there is heat and knots and slick and scenting(?) but how the dynamics work or what ABO each means? no clue. so if this is inaccurate, bear with me and let's see it as my interpretation of werwolves instead. Okay? Okay. Jjssjjs i also added this idea to the mix ps: i actually don't wanna talk about this, i need to recover first BRO GOODBYE this was kinktober 2024 besties FJJDF what a way to end it tbfh
The storm caught you by surprise. You wouldn’t particularly mind it if it wasn’t for the company you have to keep.��
Jeon Jungkook. A stubborn, self-centred peacock of a man who thinks he is something just because he is the son of the alpha.
Now, to perhaps understand the situation a little better, one might need what the literary world calls backstory.
You lived in a small mountain town far away from any big human city. The town was surrounded by high walls and visitors rarely found their way to it. It was wanted by the townspeople because you weren’t particularly human. Most humans would call you demons, but you like to call yourselves werewolves. You lived in a pack and the town was your lair.
You can be human but also turn into a wolf by choice. Some choose to keep some of their wolfish features such as their golden eyes or sharp fangs, while others looked entirely human when they walked on two legs.
Jeon Jungkook was the son of the pack alpha and therefore heir of the title. His mother was an alpha as well, which naturally gave him the alpha gen. He was stronger and faster than the other wolves in the pack and he had control over his body during the full moon. He never hid his fangs and showed his golden eyes whenever he was provoked. He earned his pack tattoos when he was twelve after killing three enemy wolves and when he turned eighteen, he earned the pack piercings after fulfilling the maturity rituals within a day. Something only his father managed to do before him.
Ever since that day, Jungkook became even more obnoxious and unlikable than he already was.
You weren’t so lucky. Born as an omega into a normal family with normal siblings in a normal house, your life has been pretty…normal. You are the same age as Jungkook, which naturally made you go to the same classes from elementary to high school. And throughout your academic career, you never learned to like him.
He was an alpha while you were an omega. You were the only one like this from your family, but they never treated you differently. You were a beloved and cherished family member and therefore lived a normal life until your older brother made a mistake and you had to carry the consequences.
He killed the promised omega wife of the enemy’s alpha’s son. The warring alpha wanted to slaughter the entire town at first, but Jungkook’s father persuaded him to take revenge another way. Take one of the village’s omegas and marry her to his son. “She will be complacent and quiet. Once she is married, she will be your property. You can take out your anger on her.” So Jungkook’s father told him and the enemy alpha agreed happily. One night later, you were dragged from your home with no way to escape your future. You were born this way, it wasn’t your fault and now it would be your death sentence. You cursed your brother that night who begged to be taken in your stead. You told him to choke on it. It was the last thing you said to him and probably will ever say to him. You already started to regret it.
Jungkook was ordered to make sure that you would arrive at the enemy village safe and sound. It has been three days ever since that night and all your hatred for anyone and anything has been directed solely at him.
“The rain’s annoying me. Let’s take shelter”, Jungkook says dryly.
“No.”
Jungkook glares at you.
“Yes”, he hisses, grabbing your arm by your elbow to drag you to a shed nearby. “I’m not gonna walk in the rain. Besides, it’s late. We need to rest.”
“Let go of me”, you protest, stumbling after him. There isn’t much that you can do. He is stronger and bigger and because of his status, he naturally has almost instinctive control over your actions. You could fight against these instincts, but it’s a lot easier not to.
“Would you rather get sick in the rain?”
“Maybe, yes. Maybe I’ll get sick enough to die. At least like this, I won’t be sold into torture”, you spit, ripping yourself free from his grasp. Again, all your hatred and anger is directed towards him, so it is easy to fight your instincts right now.
Jungkook gawks at you in surprise.
“I mean it”, you insist.
He frowns. He steps close and lifts you off the ground, throwing you over his shoulder.
“Hey! Let me down, you fuck!” you yell, flashing your fangs and kicking around you.
Jungkook merely shoulders you better and walks, frowning deeply.
“You brought this onto yourself.”
“I hate you. I fucking hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do. You big, smelling piece of shit.”
Jungkook kicks the shed open and drops you. You stumble in surprise, but catch yourself pretty quickly. You and he are mere inches away, sharing air. The constant lighting cutting the sky illuminates your angry faces. You and Jungkook have your golden eyes out and show off your fangs. Your bodies are steaming as your increased body heats dry the water.
“I’m gonna let it slip because we were classmates, but insult me again and I will make you be quiet. Understood?” he gnarls.
You step closer, making him taste your words.
“Go kiss my ass.”
You turn your back to him and stomp further into the shed.
The shed wasn’t much bigger than ten square meters. There were tools on each wall and some tools scattered around the ground. Clearly it was meant as storage for woodworkers. One corner had neat stacks of wood and on a table, some blankets were stacked in case some of the workers needed to stay the night.
“Great. That’s luxury, isn’t it?” you grumble.
The door slams closed behind you, making you flinch. You don’t look however, wanting to appear stronger than you feel. In truth, you are scared and alone and heartbroken. You are frightened. You are sad. You are afraid. You are helpless and hopeless. And you are only a little bit angry. As you walked, you couldn’t stop crying. You were happy for the rain because it masked the constant tears running down your face and you were happy for the loud thunder masking your sobs.
You are being sold like property to a man who will torture you for sports. All you want is to be home and to be held and to have someone pay for your fucking therapy because, goddamn, you are going to need a hell lot of therapy if you should survive this.
Jungkook is the last person you want to be with right now. He lacks empathy and kindness and has a tendency to impulsive anger. You are waiting for him to hurt you after slamming the door, frozen on the spot.
But it doesn’t come. Instead, he swerves past you to get firewood. You can only watch him, frozen like a scared little girl despite having long moved past your second decade on this cruel earth.
Jungkook uses his claws to ignite the fire by scratching them over a stone. He blows into the amber until it forms flames, then he stands up. He hooks his fingers in his shirt and takes it off.
You gasp and look away. You don’t know what he is going to do but it scares you. Is he going to test you out now? Make sure that the alpha is going to get a good delivery?
“Relax. I need to dry my clothes and I can’t do that on my body. I’ll catch a cold otherwise.”
“Oh.”
Jungkook scoffs and starts unbuckling his belt. You watch his tattooed fingers work. He is wearing heavy silver rings on them. Yep, your people can handle silver without pain. It’s only a myth that it hurts you. Just as garlic being lethal for vampires is a myth. Humans like to tell these tales to sleep better at night.
Jungkook begins taking off his pants, meeting your gawking eyes.
“Stop staring and bring the blankets instead.”
“Oh, uhm. Sorry.”
You instinctively obey.
“Make a bed by the fire. Away from the door.”
You obey again.
Afterwards you lift your head, having to gasp and stare. What? Stare? Why can’t you look away?
He is completely naked, currently hanging up his clothes on a chair. You should want to look away but you can’t. His body is sculpted, his muscles well defined. He currently has his back turned to you. It is so big and broad, contrasting against his small waist. Shit, his legs and butt are so big and sculpted in comparison to it. His back is covered scars. Slashes, bite marks, cuts. Some seem to have dug very deep when fresh.
“Just spit it out”, Jungkook hisses, rolling his shoulders which makes his back muscles shift and flex.
“What?”
“I can feel you staring. Just say what you wanna say.”
“Your back. It’s covered in scars.”
Jungkook touches his own back, tracing the scars he can reach.
“I guess it is.”
“Who did this to you?”
“Too many people to count.”
“What happened to them?”
“The fact that I’m still here and they’re not, should be answer enough. Shouldn’t it?”
You gulp.
Jungkook turns.
You gulp even harder. Look away! You know that no matter how hard you beg your eyes, they won’t look away. It is like they are enchanted.
His pecs are big, clearly sculpted and strong. His stomach is defined, carrying scars as well. But what truly catches your eyes is his cock. Sitting under a dark, masculine bush of pubes, it glistens in the shine of the fire. It is big, even soft, a little tanner than the rest of his skin and sitting against a pair of big, plumb balls made for breeding. So this is what the cock of an alpha looks like. The effect it has on you is embarrassing. You feel slick build up in your holes and saliva collect in your mouth.
“Quit your staring. It’s like you’ve never seen a dick before.”
You shake out of your trance, looking away in embarrassment. Your face feels on fire. Holy fuck, what is wrong with you?
“You have seen dick before, right? Weren’t you and Tae a thing in high school?” he talks as he gets under the blanket.
“Uh, yeah, uh. We were.”
“And knowing Tae, he fucked you. Didn’t he?”
You turn away in embarrassment, rubbing the side of your neck. Of course he did, but Jungkook doesn’t need to know that.
He figures it out instantly however, glancing at your middle when you aren’t looking. Just for a second, nothing more.
“So stop being weird about it”, he says and lies down.
You shrink. Jungkook studies you. You are trembling in your wet, cold clothes. He pities you.
“Get naked and hang your clothes up to dry”, he orders.
You want to move in obedience at first, but then stop. You are too scared to obey instinctively.
“No. Close your eyes.”
Jungkook groans and closes his eyes.
“You’re so stuck up. You should practice being naked in front of other people. I heard that Alpha Urquard likes for his pack to watch wedding nights.”
You bite down tears. Great. Not only will you be assaulted, it will happen in front of god knows how many people. What if you just throw yourself onto one of the sharp tools? It would be a bitch way to go, but it’s better than what will happen to you.
You ogle the pitchfork. Maybe you could do it. Maybe.
“Hey!”
You snap out of it. You whip around, meeting Jungkook’s eyes.
“Hurry up and come here.”
“What?”
“Come here. It’s better than over there.”
You ogle the pitchfork then his darkened face. Did he figure you out?
“I’m not gonna repeat myself. Get out of your wet clothes and come to me.”
“Ple-please close your eyes.”
Jungkook sighs in defeat and obeys. With shaking fingers, you get naked. With trembling knees, you walk to his side. With weak muscles, you get under the blanket next to him. There is only one blanket and you try your fucking hardest not to touch his body in any kind of way. He left you the spot closer by the fire so you were warmer and he could oversee the door.
Jungkook, who senses your presence, opens his eyes. He studies your face, then your body. You have the blanket pulled up to your neck, shivering uncontrollably. Even now, you seem plagued by the cold.
He furrows his brows in distaste and closes the distance. He manages to put his arm around you before your quiet beg freezes him.
“Please don’t hurt me.”
He moves away, studying you in shock. Your eyes are squeezed shut, your fingers are trembling as you grasp the blanket.
“Why would I hurt you?”
The honest confusion in his voice forces you to open your eyes.
The fire casts deep shadows into his face as much as it illuminates other parts of it. His wet hair is drying slowly, sticking to his wrinkled forehead. He is furrowing his brows which explains the wrinkles.
“Why would I hurt you?” he repeats his question with more urgency.
“I don’t know.”
“I was ordered to make sure that you arrive unharmed to Urquard. The last thing I’ll do is hurt you.”
“Please don’t.”
“Please don’t?”
“Don’t make sure that I arrive safely.”
Jungkook blinks in surprise. Such vulnerability isn’t what he expected from the once feisty, rude woman of before. You are tiny in fear, trembling uncontrollably and begging him with greyed, hopeless eyes.
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re gonna be an alpha’s wife. That’s every omega’s dream”, he snarls, sounding weirdly jealous.
You burst into tears instantly, turning your back to him as you curl into a small ball. You wail loudly, unable to pretend any longer. You don’t want to be married off. You don’t want it.
“No, uh… stop crying. I, I’m ordering you to stop crying”, he panics, hissing his words which only makes you cry harder.
He stares for a while, fumbling with his words. In the end he doesn’t know what to say, turning off his brain to speak from his heart instead.
“Don’t cry, it’s gonna be okay”, he says softly, rubbing your shoulder.
His touch is tender and soothing. You sob despite it or perhaps because of it. It feels so weird to receive because it is nice.
“Hey, it’s okay”, he tells you, draping his arm over you. Like this, your bodies are touching under the blanket. He feels so warm against your skin. “It’s gonna be okay.”
“It’s not gonna be okay. I’m being sold like a pig to a man who likes to watch his daughters in law get raped in front of the entire pack and who will use every second of his life to torture me.” You shrink into yourself. “I just wanna die. I’m so scared.”
“Hey no, don’t say that. Don’t be scared, I’m here.”
“I heard that Urquard killed his first wife by ramming a medal hook into her stomach and hanging her like this. All because she couldn’t give him a child with the alpha gen. Please just kill me, please.”
“I’m not gonna kill you, ___.”
The last time Jungkook said your name, you and he were both eleven and played adventurers in the forest. He celebrated his twelfth birthday two weeks later and another two weeks later, he killed those three wolves and got his tattoos. He stopped playing with you and stopped saying your name. Quite frankly, he stopped playing with any children since that day, saying stuff like “a man wouldn’t play stupid stuff” or “my father says that it’s weak to play” and he became quiet and distant. Maybe he became sadder as well and lonelier.
Your name from his tongue after almost fifteen years forces you to turn in his arms. For just a second, the same innocent and playful boy looks back at you before you blink and come back to reality. His features and eyes are still the same shape and colour but he seemed to have grown into them. His left cheek carries a scar these days and his brows are furrowed more than they are relaxed.
“I’m not gonna kill you, ___. And I’m not gonna let you kill yourself either.”
“So you would rather see me sold to a monster?” You squeeze out tears of anger and frustration. “I hate you so much. You sadistic, heartless piece of shit.”
Jungkook frowns deeper.
“You alphas are all the same. You think just because you are stronger than the rest of us, you can push us around like cattle. We aren’t cattle. We are people, we live normal and good lives. We are nothing special but that’s good. We’re boring and mundane but we love deeply. Unlike you disgusting, selfish alphas who see us as nothing but merchandise.”
“Are you done now?”
“I’ve only started. You are heartless, selfish, self-absorbed, apathetic and a snob. At the spot where your heart once was, a rotten piece of coal is sitting and when you talk, plants die out of spite.”
“Anything else you like to add?”
“You are the worst person to ever exist. You are elitist and stubborn and way too obsessed with status. And you…” Your eyes fill with tears. “...you broke my heart before I even knew what heartbreak was.”
Jungkook’s eyes darken in an unfamiliar emotion. Guilt? Regret? More anger?
“We did everything together until one day, you decided that I wasn’t good enough anymore. For fuck’s sake, we were twelve and you acted like I was embarrassing for doing stuff kids our age were allowed to do.”
“You think that I had a choice?” He finally speaks up and you get a feeling that it was your turn to listen. “I stopped being a kid in my father’s eyes the day I killed those wolves. I didn’t wanna push you away, but father made me.”
“What?”
“I became his heir that day, I sealed my fucking fate. I had to stop playing a-and doing kid’s stuff. He forced me to train day in and out. I had to be the perfect man. I was twelve, for fuck’s sake. I was a fucking kid who wanted to play adventurers in the forest with, with his….with his best friend.”
The silence which follows after his confession is deafening. Fifteen years of hating him. Fifteen years of thinking that he hated you. And all this time, he only acted like this because his father made him. You meet his emotional eyes, feeling emotional yourself.
“I was your best friend?” you whisper.
He nods his head, biting down on his lower lip to stop it from trembling.
“I miss you, ___”, he presses out.
You feel lost for words. You are so shaken in fact that you can’t even find it in you to cry. Fifteen years. Fifteen years of hating him for what he did and wishing for an apology you thought would never come and here it is. His confession. His apology.
“It’s been fifteen years and I still do. I miss you and I’m sorry.” He cups your face, wiping away the remnants of tears. “I’m so sorry.”
You stare. And stare. And stare.
“Please say something”, he whispers.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Just anything, please.”
“You’re the most selfish piece of shit I have ever seen.”
Jungkook’s face falls in shock. His eyes show how much your words hurt him.
“Why tell me your stupid apology now? Why confess to me now? Knowing that I will be sold into a life of sex slavery and torture?” You hit his chest. “Why tell me now when you literally deliver me to my fucking death? You piece of shit, you’re selfish and cruel and I want you dead.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do. You and your entire family and the rest of the pack. Die. All of you just die.”
You hit him with more vigour. More and more and more.
“Enough”, he stops you, pinning your wrists into the ground and with it, rendering you helpless, “stop hitting me, please.”
You spit at his face.
Jungkook flinches back. He sits up and wipes it away.
“What the fuck? You spat at me. Why would you do that?”
“Go to hell and shove your sappy confession up your sadistic ass”, you hiss. You feel no ounce of remorse for what you did.
Jungkook wipes your spit into the blanket and moves quickly. He puts your wrists together and pins them above your head. Before you can spit again, he puts his other hand over your mouth, rending your legs useless as well by slinging one of his muscular legs over yours.
There is no fabric between your bodies. You are skin against skin. Raw and naked and hot. You can feel his dick against you and you know that he can feel your tits against his arm. You are rendered useless, vulnerable to whatever he plans to do to you now that spat at him. You are scared, but you are also droopy. It is that same droopiness you felt when you looked at his naked body. Except stronger and more unbearable. You are hotter and there is slick gathering in your holes. You can barely breathe, but maybe this is because of his hand over your mouth.
“Stop fighting me and listen”, Jungkook talks with his lips close to your face. You can’t stop staring at them. You fight him while your mind goes droopy at the sight of his lips moving. “You can either go to your new life or listen. Are you gonna listen?”
You nod your head.
“Good. I’m gonna pull my hand away now and you won’t spit at my face again. Promise?”
You nod hesitantly.
“Good. I trust your word.”
He pulls his hand away, keeping his arm around you. It lies exactly over your tits, rubbing against your nipples. You know for a fact that he is able to feel it. You curl your fingers, trying so hard not to get affected by his closeness. Or to make a sound for that matter.
“I said this stuff to you because I wanna make it right between us. Your brother fucked up, but what Urquard did in retaliation is crazy and what father allowed is insane. If you want me to, I won’t bring you to him.”
“What? But…your father promised.”
“I don’t care. It’s barbaric that omega trading is still a thing. You are right, you are people not cattle.”
“If he finds out that you refuse, he will disown you.”
“I have a plan for that.”
“Urquard will kill you.”
“That’s why I have a plan.”
“What plan?”
“It’s gonna sound insane.”
“Just tell me please. I don’t wanna be sold.”
“The only way I can free you of this pact is if you get marked by another alpha. You’re unclaimed right now, but if you were to be marked by an alpha other than Urquard’s son, then the pact would be invalid.”
“What do you mean with marked?”
He hesitates.
“Tell me.”
“An alpha would have to put his dick into you.”
“So assault? I would have to be assaulted?”
“Not if you wanted it.”
“Huh?”
“Not if it’s with someone you trust. Someone who’s gonna be careful and gentle and who’s gonna make it nice for you.”
“And who should that be? Last time I checked, I’m not really friends with many…”
Your eyes meet Jungkook’s. He seems shy all of a sudden.
“Oh.”
You gasp for air.
“Oh.”
“I know it’s crazy. I thought of other ways. I’ve been plotting ever since we left town. That’s why I volunteered. To give us time, to give me time to think of something. I thought of lots of stuff, but they all ended in hypothetical death or enslavement of our pack. The only peaceful option was this.”
“You volunteered to bring me?”
He nods his head, “anyone else would have been too scared of or too loyal to my dad. I know you’re scared, but I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.”
“And you thought of this?”
“It’s the only way. We kill Urquard and his sons? Their pack comes after us. We run away? Their pack is gonna punish our pack. We kill everyone? Impossible we’d die and destine our pack to agony. It’s only death and pain u-unless you get marked by an alpha.”
“But I would have to be with you afterwards.”
“Only if you want to. We can pretend, make everyone think that it’s real. You wouldn’t have to be with me ever again.”
“Oh my god, this is insane.”
“I know. I’m sorry. The choice is yours. I promise.”
You study his face. You are still trapped under him, sharing heat. Skin against skin. arm against chest and cock against hip. He is semi hard by now, smearing slick on your skin. The fact that he is affected by this - by you - doesn’t make it easier to stay calm. You are glad for his leg over yours because it forces your legs to be closed and therefore hide the masses of slick having accumulated by now. His hair is still damp, hanging into his face messily. His fingers feel so strong and protective around your wrists. You swear that each time he breathes out and you inhale it, you feel high. You are so attracted to him right now.
Truth be told, you always thought that he was handsome beyond comparison. He has a mesmerizing aura and a captivating smile. His physique is your dream physique and his face often caught your attention in a crowd. You were utterly and insanely attracted to him which made your hatred for him grow deeper. He betrayed you, but he is still haunting your thoughts. It was unbearable until right now.
“I’m scared. I never did it with an alpha before”, you confess, suddenly feeling so vulnerable.
And Jungkook takes that vulnerability, cradling it in his safe palm just as he cradles your cheek the same way. His eyes softened, his voice did too.
“Don’t be scared. I’ll be gentle. I promise”, he almost whispers the words, tracing your brow and temple between cradling your cheek.
“I don’t know you like that.”
“Neither do I you. It’s gonna be a one time thing.”
“I’m scared. I’ve been scared ever since all of this started.”
“Don’t be. I’m here. I won’t let them touch you.”
“But you’ll touch me?” you ask in a whisper, lifting the inner corners of your brows.
Jungkook has a hard time staying calm when you look at him with such puppy eyes.
“If you let me, I will.”
You exhale shakily, squirming under him.
“I’m scared.”
He lets go of your wrists to cradle your other cheek. You lean into the touch, barely wanting to keep your eyes open. Your arms stay in their submissive position naturally.
“Just the tip. That’s all it takes. Just the tip for a few seconds so you take on my scent and then it’ll be over”, he says.
“Just the tip?”
“Yes, just the tip. Nothing more. I promise.”
You are going to do something which you thought never to do. But if it saves your life, you would do anything. Even something as crazy as allow Jungkook to stick his tip into you.
“Okay. Just the tip.”
Jungkook exhales shakily, moving closer for a kiss like it was instinct before he stops himself. You shudder, craving nothing more than what he denies both of you.
“We shouldn’t be doing this”, he breathes.
“What?”
“Kiss.” He lets the word dance over your lips, running his thumb under your lips as his eyes stare. “We shouldn’t.”
“No, we shouldn’t”, you whimper, chasing him.
Moments of craving and yearning where both of you try so hard to kiss the other. But you shouldn’t. Just the tip, nothing more.
“Roll to your side, please”, Jungkook breaks the electric silence, guiding you with his hand on your shoulder until your back faces his chest.
You can see the fire and the rest of the shed like this, but not Jungkook.
“Why like this?”
“If I look at your face, I’ll stick it in completely. I can’t do this to you.”
“Oh.”
Jungkook closes the distance, connecting his hand with your hip. He guides it up your body, travelling along your waist and arm. His touch leaves goosebumps where it goes. His palm is slightly calloused from fighting but incredibly tender in how it touches you. You feel yourself breathe heavier and heavier the longer he touches you.
He reaches your shoulder, closing the last of the distance by lowering his lips to your back.
“Ah”, you let out quietly, tensing up. Your eyes are widened comically big, staring into the bright flames. He is kissing your naked skin. What the fuck.
Jungkook’s eyes are closed in contrast. His head is foggy, but he tries to fight these feelings. You smell so good that it is very difficult to do so.
His hand is still on your shoulder at first but moves to your waist when he guides his kisses to said shoulder.
“Oh god”, you whisper, sighing afterwards.
Jungkook feels droopy from the sound, digging his fingers into the softness of your side. He shouldn’t be doing this. Just the tip. That’s what he said. And yet here he is, kissing your soft skin as if it was his right to do so. He shouldn’t be doing this, but he can’t stop. He traces and holds your side and stomach, telling himself that he only does it to relax you. He kisses every inch of your exposed back and shoulder, telling himself that he only does it to calm you down. When in truth he does all of this because he wants to make it nice for you. And maybe he wants to be a source of tenderness after what you had to go through.
Lies. These are still lies. He fucking does this because he wants to. He fucking does it because he wants to know how it is to touch you. Taehyung talked when you and he were high school sweethearts. Oh, Taehyung talked and Jungkook had to listen and secretly seethe with jealousy. It should be him, he thought back then, he would know how to treat you right.
You had no idea of these thoughts. You still haven’t as you lie here next to the warm fire while Jungkook touches you oh so carefully. You don’t know if you’re allowed to close your eyes. Just the tip, you agreed on. Can you close your eyes for that?
But it feels so good. His lips are soft, while his piercings are hard in contrast. His touch is currently dancing up the middle of your torso slowly. You fight the shivers wanting to run through you.
You lose the fight a moment later when he pulls you against his strong chest and kisses your neck.
You whimper, trembling like crazy. You arch into him, craning your neck to give him more of it. Your heart skips beats under his lips. Jungkook grips the blanket to stop his hand from cradling your tits.
“Fuck, I shouldn’t be doing this”, he presses out under his breath, mouthing at your neck hungrily. “I shouldn’t….do…this.”
He drags his lips to your jawline and sucks. Your eyes close.
You mewl, rolling your hips back into him. His cock slides between your legs, rubbing between your puffy folds. He trembles in shock, gripping your hip to stop your wiggles.
“Don’t do this. Don’t act like this when it is supposed to mean nothing.”
“I’m sorry, I can’t help it.”
“Mhhm I know. You can’t, but I can. I won’t do it again, I’m sorry.”
You swallow your begs, not wanting to appear weak or desperate. It is so difficult not to beg when you have his cock between your legs. Hugged by your folds and exchanging slick. He feels hot and his veins are pulsing desperately. You have never before felt so stupidly horny than you do right now. Quite frankly, he might be forcing you to go into impromptu heat if he keeps being like this.
“Just the tip, yeah? Just the tip”, he whispers as he puts his arm under your head so you have something comfortable to rest on. You practically melt into him, biting back tears. You are being held and it feels so good. So safe and warm.
He kisses your neck and cheek, whispering his words.
“Are you comfortable? Are you ready?”
“Yeah”, you sigh, pushing your hips back.
Jungkook slides his other hand between your bodies, using it to align his cock with your dripping entrance. Just the tip, he reminds himself, nothing more. Don’t be greedy, keep calm. This doesn’t mean anything.
“Last chance”, he says, wanting to stall time so he can calm down.
“I trust you.”
Jungkook bites back his moan, having to take a deep breath before he can act. You are messing him up without knowing. With a racing pulse, he applies pressure on your puffy cunt and slips inside.
You squeak, shaking against your will. You convulse around him, gasping repeatedly. He went in so easily, despite his size.
Jungkook growls, “fuck, holy fuck”, he gets out and bruises your hip as he grips it for support. It takes everything inside him not to push it all the way in. Jungkook genuinely has a hard time not to moan. You are so wet.
Judging from your tremors and the way you fight for air, it is just as difficult for you.
“Only a few more second”, he forces his voice to sound as normal as possible. He wants to fuck you, but knows that he shouldn’t.
“Mh-hm”, you squeak out, nodding your head. You want him to fuck you.
Jungkook closes his hand to a fist, growing his claws to dig them into his own palm. The pain keeps him from acting up. He wouldn’t be able to handle it otherwise.
Jungkook always hoped that he would marry you one day. There it is. It’s out there. Jungkook had feelings for you for decades. In his dreams, you marry him and he can spend the rest of his days spoiling you rotten. He would be your protector against any danger, your best friend to laugh with, your remedy for your heats and the lover you can be yourself with.
Being with you like this is everything he ever wished for. You are so soft and warm around him, your slick is so wet. He knows that, deeper inside, it would be so much more. You'd be so warm, so soft. Jungkook gulps down his desire for more, otherwise he would do things he would regret.
“I think it should be good”, he presses out. He can’t do it anymore. One more second and he would push in all the way. He can’t do this to you. You trust him and he can’t abuse this trust.
“Really?”
You turn your head, looking up at him in droopy devotion. Jungkook whimpers, instantly cradling your cheek. He furrows his brows, throbbing inside you. He fights the urge to kiss you, to rest his forehead against yours, to bury himself deep inside you.
“Please don’t look at me.”
“Jungkook.”
His name hasn’t rolled off your tongue ever since he left you at the playground. It almost brings tears to his eyes, forcing his arm around you tighter.
“I can’t do this”, he drops his forehead against yours “I think I remembered that I need to put in all of it. It’s not gonna work otherwise.”
He is lying, because he can’t accept the truth yet. That he is selfish and totally addicted to you.
“Please do.”
“No. No we shouldn’t be doing this”, he fights it still, shaking his head which makes his nose rub against yours.
“Please”, your words tickle his lips, “save me. Whatever it takes, save me.”
“Urgh”, he growls through gritted teeth.
“Please.”
Jungkook lifts his head. He wants to look into your eyes as he does it. He wants to see the utter bliss in your eyes as he turns your relationship status from ex childhood best friends to two adults reunited.
He rolls his hips, feeding your warmth his length inch by inch. Your brows furrow and lift, your lids flutter, your mouth falls open.
“A-ah”, you squeak out.
“Shhh, it’s okay. I’m here. I’m all here”, he whispers. He closes his arm around you, cradling you in a gentle headlock.
You close your fingers around his lower arm, spilling tears from your eyes.
“Does it hurt?”
You shake your head.
“But?”
“So…filled out. So big.”
“I know. I’m big, but you’re taking me so well.”
You whimper. Jungkook feels so insanely protective over you right now.
“Yes, you are. Taking me so well”, he insists, brushing the back of his hand down your cheek.
Jungkook continues until he bottoms out. He shudders, choking down a whimper. You feel so good. He never ever felt like this before. It feels like coming home which is insane because he was never with you like this.
“___”, your name comes out of him against his will.
“Jungkook”, you answer him, clenching around him.
“Stay still, please.”
“Okay”, you whimper, looking at his lips.
The pull is magnetic. Jungkook draws closer with parted lips, you meet him with parted lips. Once you kiss, it will be over for you and him. There will be no coming back from this.
“No”, he croaks, putting his hand over your mouth. The headlock tightens like this, giving you such a sense of being protected that your walls clench against your will.
“We shouldn’t kiss. Never”, he rasps weakly, mouthing at his own hand right where your lips lie beneath. You close your eyes, trying to move your lips under his hand. It is starting to feel cruel to be denied his kiss. Especially when memories of your past come back to you.
You remember that it was a group of eight kids and you were doing “dares” to see who is the coolest. Taehyung was dared to prank call his mom and he actually did. He pretended to be a grown up insurance clerk and once he hung up, you really thought that he managed to prank his mom (he didn’t hide his phone number and had a childlike voice). Jimin, another friend, was dared to climb a tree. Which he did and he was sooo cool for it. They were silly, childish dares who did no harm but made you feel so cool. Then it came to you and you were dared to kiss Jungkook. Which you did. In a childlike, innocent way but which made you and him feel so grown up for a moment.
The memory is haunting you right now, making you want to redo it in a grown up, mature way. You open your eyes, meeting Jungkook’s gaze. Judging from the foggy desperation in them, he is haunted by the same memory.
“Please get out of my head”, he gets out.
You whimper his name behind his hand. Jungkook furrows his brows, grinding his teeth.
“No please. Stop it”, he croaks, squeezing his eyes shut.
You want to fight it as well, of course you do. You swore to hate him forever and now you want nothing else than his kiss. You want to fight it, but your hands move against your will. They rest themselves over Jungkook’s hand and try to dig between your face and his palm.
He growls, huffing out air. The only thing keeping your hips from joining the impossible fight is his hand on it. Shit, now he is concentrating on down below. Your puffy walls around him, so soft and warm. Being inside you, Jungkook swears he will never be cold again. Or maybe he will be, maybe he will never find warmth again once this stops, once he has to slip out and pretend that it meant nothing.
What will happen afterwards? He is so needy and he knows that you are too. What will happen? Are you going to lie next to each other, wet and needy and force your bodies to calm down? Or maybe he will need to excuse himself to outside, fuck his own fist as the loud thunder masks his desperate moans while inside the shed you most definitely would touch yourself as well?
Jungkook was so lost in his haunted thoughts that he realises too late that you managed to tug his hand away. Your lips brush his’.
Jungkook moans from the bottom of his heart, going in for more at first. He even rolls his hips into you. Like instinct. Like it is meant to happen.
“No”, he pushes you away, slips out, breaks the moment. “We shouldn’t be doing this. Not that far.”
You sob, shrinking into yourself.
“Please”, you whimper your words, staring at him with desperate, sad eyes. You lift your hips, begging him silently.
“I won’t be able to stop if I do it again. I can’t do this to you.”
“Please”, you beg.
“Do you even know what an alpha does when he fucks? I won’t be able to stop until I bred you. I-I’ll knot you and, and you won’t be able to get me out until I’m soft again.”
“I know.”
“This could take hours. You will feel out of control and vulnerable.”
“You said that you will protect me. That I-I’m safe with you.”
“___”, he chokes out and crawls to you. He picks you up in his strong arms, holding you against his chest. His heart is racing like crazy against your back. “Stop me. I beg you. I can’t pretend any longer that this means nothing to me. You have to stop this.”
You reach up and twist his hair, pulling him down to you.
“We shouldn’t-”
You silence him with a kiss.
Jungkook trembles, resting his weight against you as the kiss renders his body useless for a moment. You are kissing him. You stopped this stupid farce for you and him. You sealed your fates. Jungkook knows that it won’t be the same after tonight. He will never fucking give you up.
He breaks the kiss, but stay close.
“You shouldn’t have done this.”
“Please. More.”
“Are you even hearing me?” he hisses.
“Yes. Please, more.”
“Fuck, we really shouldn’t, but maybe I…I have to move it a few times? To really mark you?”
“Yes, sounds good, mark me please. I don’t wanna be sold.”
“I-I’ll do it just for that. To make sure.”
“Yes. Okay”, you sigh and melt into him, lifting your leg.
Jungkook slides his hand under it instantly.
“Let me do it. Relax.”
You let your muscles relax, allowing him to carry your leg’s weight. He does it so easily, tracing your hairline with his fingertips as he looks down at you. He moves his hips so his cock would slip between your folds, working you up to what was coming by grinding back and forth. He really drags out the movements, sending trembles through your legs each time his thick tip rubs your swollen clit.
He exhales shakily, whispering his thoughts.
“You’re so wet. I have never felt slick so warm and, and wet before.”
You look up at him with shy, nervous puppy eyes, making him want to protect you forever.
“Is it bad?”
“No, fuck no”, he puts his arm around your chest, pulling you up to him until he can rest his forehead against yours. “It’s perfect, baby.”
“Baby?”
“I…” he drops you, hips stilling in shock. He doesn’t know what to say. Anything he could say feels like too little of an apology.
You however increase the lethalness of your puppy eyes, reaching down to try and move his hips again.
“Please. More.”
“We’re only doing this to save you, right?” He asks, picking up a rhythm again. It is the same as before but way more arousing because he purposefully makes sure that his tip slips into you every now and then. He starts off with just a little poke, increasing the inches more and more. But it stays just the tip, for now, don’t be mistaken. If he slips inside it should happen accidentally. He likes to tell himself if it happens like this, it will mean that it wasn’t his fault.
“Yes, only to save me” you lull your words, getting droopier and droopier. Each time he has his tip inside you, it feels so good. Before he slips out and you feel sad, until of course he drags his cock over your clit instead.
You can’t do this for long anymore and Jungkook seems to share your feelings. The tip he buries in you starts to go way past your entrance and it seems to stay longer inside. His golden eyes never break contact, his fingers rub your arm as he holds you so close.
He slips into you again. So deep.
“Mhhhhm” he lets out in a rumble, furrowing his brows.
You whimper, lifting your brows.
Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. He won’t be able to escape like this.
Deeper.
He bottoms out.
You moan, eyelids fluttering and lips chasing his kiss.
He shakes his head, talking as he falls into the kiss.
“We really shouldn’t be doing this.”
You kiss and Jungkook’s cock doesn’t leave you again. It stays buried deep inside you, reshaping your walls as his hips move. Slowly for now, daring not to be too rough with you. Because being rough makes it real. Maybe if he keeps his movements tiny enough, it will still count as being nothing of importance.
Because that’s what this is, right? Something that doesn’t mean anything, something that won’t change who you and he are. This is what those needy, hungry tongue kisses mean, this is what the desperate touches mean, this is what the exchanging of warm slick means. Nothing. Because if those things meant something, it would force Jungkook to admit that he is doing This for himself. Of course he does it to save you, but if it meant something, he would have to admit that he is also doing this for himself.
But it doesn’t mean anything, right? Right?
You break the kiss for air, looking up at him submissively and droopy.
“It feels so good”, you whisper.
“Close your eyes, please.”
You obey and Jungkook has to come to the realisation that it makes no difference. This fucking means something. Holy fuck, he is done for.
“Maybe I have to make you cum?”
“What?” you ask, eyes still closed.
“I think I need to make you cum once. Then you’ll be marked.”
“Please do. I trust you.”
Trust. He thought that he would never earn it again and yet here he is. With your weakened, trembling body in his hold as you trust him to take good care of you.
“Mhhm shit”, he presses out, biting down on his own tongue to calm himself. Be tender with her, he thinks, you swore to be a gentle alpha so fucking get it together.
He moves you into another position, draping your leg over his hip so you wouldn’t have to use your muscles. You are so open and spread like this, allowing his big cock entrance. He slides his hand to your clit and takes it between his thumb and middle finger to massage it.
“A-ha”, you let out, arching your back and lifting your hips.
��Ssssh, relax. I’m here.”
“Please, deeper.”
Jungkook buries his cock deep inside you and stays there, circling his hips. He is so big and long that he stimulates both your g-spot and your cervix. He is so gentle that it doesn’t hurt. It just feels so good that your fangs grow against your will and you leak masses of new slick.
“Like this? Am I making it nice for you?”
“So nice”, you mewl, nodding your head vigorously.
Jungkook is gazing at you as it happens. He watches every change of expression on your face, fighting the urge to call you beautiful. Because that’s what you are. Beautiful. You would deserve to know but he is scared of the consequences. It would mean the fluttering of his heart is real.
“Is so nice”, you sigh, writhing happily. It breaks him.
“You’re beautiful”, he says, moaning softly when you tighten and arch your back. So you liked it. His cock throbs inside you, leaking into you needily. “Yeah that’s right, you’re beautiful. So fucking beautiful. Taking me so well, feeling so good on my cock.”
“Ah, aaaah”, your moans are so loud, your pussy so fucking wet and your clit so swollen.
Jungkook fucks you gently, massaging your spot of pleasure with his long, skilled fingers. He can feel your heartbeat in your back, as much as he can feel you rub against his nipples.
The blanket over your bodies is so hot, making you and him sweat wherever you are touching. He can’t deny it anymore that this is real, that this means something. This means fucking everything to him.
“You’re such a good omega, taking me so well.”
“You’re making me cum”, you croak, grasping his arm for support, “please, can I cum?”
“Yes, baby. You can. Cum for me.”
“Jungkook”, you gasp, ripping your eyes open to stare in shock as his gentle touches bring you over the edge.
Your eyes flicker golden, you moan silently with an open mouth.
“That’s it, cum for your alpha. Let me mark you, that’s it.”
He has a hard time saying these words to you. His thoughts are running wild. This is the face you make when you have an orgasm. Never in his wildest dreams could he have imagined this to be a face he gets to see. And it’s so beautiful that he treads the moment your high stops and he has to pull out. He doesn’t want to pull out. He needs more of you. He needs you like fucking crazy.
“More please”, and then your beg releases him. You are down from your high, yet still so hungry for more. You feel so fulfilled with him that you don’t want this to stop.
“What?” he croaks.
“More please, more.”
“If I do this, I won’t stop until I cum too.”
“I know.”
“Maybe you’re right. Maybe I have to cum inside you to mark you?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
The pretend continues. The fucking charades that this is only to save you from your fate, that you and he aren’t doing this because it feels so good to both of you.
“Please Jungkook, fuck me properly.”
“Are you sure?” he almost squeaks the words because he has such a hard time controlling his urges.
“Yes. Please.”
“Holy fuck. ___ urgh.”
Your needy beg does the rest. His animalistic instincts take over.
Jungkook growls, grabbing you roughly to flip you onto your stomach and therefore pin you down. He straddles you from behind. His right hand slips to the back of your head, his left hand has a possessive grip on your hip. His legs cage in your legs, keeping them squeezed together as he drills his thick cock into your pussy. You are so tight like this, jerking him off in such a maddening way.
You scream up as you didn’t expect him to take on such a punishing pace instantly, but you aren’t complaining. It feels so good to take him. He fucks you so well. His cock is so filling, making you feel whole.
“I’m not holding back now. For you, just for you. Is this good for you? Do you like this?”, he growls through gritted fangs, shifting his eyes between your face and his cock.
“Yeaa”, you sob, clawing at the ground helplessly. You were aware that Jungkook has been an adult for years, but this is still changing how you see him. Whenever you thought of him, you saw that twelve year old boy calling you immature for playing. That boy is gone as if he never existed. Jungkook is a fucking adult and he is rewriting the image in your mind one heavy stroke at a time.
“You should have never seen me like this. Fuck, this shouldn’t happen”, Jungkook spits, high on your body. He is embarrassed by his actions, but can’t stop them. “But I can’t stop. Holy fuck, I need you so fucking bad.” He needs to fuck you. You are so small and weak right now, so goddamn vulnerable. Once so unclaimed until he took you.
You are his.
Jungkook growls, pinning you harder into the ground.
You are his.
You reach behind yourself because his hand on your head hurts. He grabs your wrist instantly, using it to pin your arm against your back. You wail up, kicking the ground as best as possible as you writhe in your imprisonment.
“I’m sorry. You shouldn’t see me like this. Not you. I’m sorry.”
He apologises, knowing that he won’t be able to stop until you are claimed. The thought makes him crazy. He is claiming you. The girl who was his first kiss, his best friend who always came to him when she needed help, the woman who counts on him to protect her from her fate and the wife he always hoped to have one day. And he is claiming her. He is marking her, making you his for anyone to smell.
Jungkook drills you harder. He pulls out all the way to his tip just to thrust into you sloppily. He does it over and over again, reminding your dripping pussy of his size with each possessive thrust.
And you take it with grateful sobs, existing only for him right now. You would never recover if he stopped right now. You need him to finish what he started even if it ruins you in the process.
“We really shouldn’t be doing this, fuck, this shouldn’t happen”, Jungkook gets out, gawking at where he buries himself in you.
Your slick is slowly taking on a milky colour from the intense friction. It sticks to his veiny shaft and his dark pubes, smearing all over your ass and his thighs as well.
If this shouldn’t happen, why does it feel so good? If this shouldn’t happen, why does it look so hot? If this shouldn’t happen, why does he not want to stop?
Jungkook scrunches his face in anger. He lets go of your arm so he can grip your hips with both hands. He pulls them up until you are kneeling. Your face is still buried in the ground, your back is arched.
You shake and convulse instantly, sobbing in embarrassment because the open position of your legs forces your slick to run out of you.
“Holy fuck”, he gets out, staring at it with blown out pupils, “holy fuck, ___.”
“I’m sorry, please don’t judge me”, you beg, trying so hard to keep it inside with clenches around his cock.
“Never. Holy fuck, I could never.”
“I’m so embarrassed.”
“Don’t be. Relax, baby. Don’t fight it”, he says, knowing that you and he shouldn’t be doing this.
You obey instinctively. You relax around him, releasing the slick you so desperately wanted to hide from him. It begins squirting out of you messily and audibly, marking him yours.
“Yes”, he growls and begins pulling your hips onto his cock possessively, thrusting into you at the same time. He does it with one hand because the other he slips between your legs to pinch your clit. Gently of course, keeping her between two fingers to massage her in circular motions.
“Let me help you.”
You wail and shake, releasing more and more of your pretty slick. It runs down your thighs, covers his legs, smears all over your ass and his stomach.
“Relax, that’s it. My pretty omega shouldn’t keep it inside. It’s not good for you.”
“Jungkook, I can’t do this”, you sob.
“I know. We can’t do this, we never should have.”
“No”, you wail, “no. I have to cum again.”
“Whenever you want to. Your alpha’s right here, baby.”
“Jungkook!” you scream, breaking apart as if you never orgasmed before. It feels so good.
“Holy fuck baby, ah!” Jungkook yelps, hips stuttering in shock, “you feel so good, what the fuck ah! Ah! I can’t control myself. Baby!”
Jungkook growls and lays himself over you. He holds you up with one hand around you, biting down on your shoulder as his body breaks. You sob from the pain of the bite, loving every second of it.
And then it hits you.
His seed.
His thick, hot seed.
It shoots out of him with such strength that you feel punched in the gut. The effect is instant. You lose control over yourself. Quite literally, you lose control. You can still talk, using it to scream his name as you orgasm in a way you have never experienced before.
The first one was intense but familiar. This right now? You didn’t even know that your body could feel this way. It is truly, seriously, religious. It is as if you finally found your purpose in life. And in a sense you did. You found your alpha. He finally claimed you properly. You are his’. You aren’t unclaimed anymore. Nobody ever educated on this, so you have no idea that these religious, soul fulfilling feelings mean that you changed forever, but you don’t mind right now. You are just riding on these feelings, screaming his name and milking him dry.
Jungkook whimpers. He truly, honestly whimpers from the bottom of his heart, collapsing on top of you. He knocks you into the ground like that, burying you under his weight but he couldn’t stop it from happening.
He never experienced this feeling either. He had sex with people, but it never felt like This before. He orgasmed in them but it never felt like this. It feels as if his seed finally has purpose. That’s how it feels. Like his efforts and all the rutting he is doing has fucking purpose.
And then it happens. Something that he was only told could happen to him, finally happens to him. His knot swells. He actually fucking grows a knot and has to writhe on top of you, burying his nose deep in your hair as he sobs your name.
You sob as well, insides suddenly feeling like bursting. His knot is so big and thick that it should feel like an intruder but it doesn’t. It feels like the best drug ever. You didn’t even know that you could stretch this far. The amount of stimulation it gives you as it rubs against your walls is otherworldly, making you chase one orgasm after the other.
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. Ah! ___!” Jungkook yelps, having to orgasm again as your tight walls stimulate his knot. The amount of sensitivity he feels on it is insane.
His hands slide together with yours, holding them tightly as he pins them into the ground. His tears fall into your hair, your own tears soak the blanket.
“I can’t stop”, you get out, shaking in fear, “I can’t stop cumming!”
“Me neither.”
“I’m scared. I’m so scared”, you sob, riding on the unfamiliar, scary sensations.
“Don’t be scared, I’m here. I’m here”, he talks you through it, shaking beyond saving.
You aren’t even moving much. There are no thrusts, no sloppy wiggles. Just and you and him, actually stuck together because of his knot while he pumps one cumshot after the other into you. There is no movement and yet it feels better than the most passionate rutting session you each had. No movement and yet you are fulfilled beyond comparison. Is this how it feels to find your mate? Is this what it is?
Did “we shouldn’t be doing this” turn into the finding of your other half? Was “we shouldn’t be doing this” fate’s way of protecting you from what will happen once you gave in? Or was there ever a “we shouldn’t be doing this” strong enough that could have prevented you from doing this?
Whatever it might be, it is too late to think about the what ifs now. The reality is that you and he can’t stop climaxing, lost in the most addicting and intense pleasure you and he ever found yourselves in. It is never ending. When he climaxes, you have to too which sets him off again, triggering your need to as well. It is a vicious, never ending, orgasmic cycle.
“This feels so good”, he croaks out, writhing on top of you, “does it feel-”
“Yes! Yes! Oh god please Kook not again. Kook!”
“Kook”, Jungkook repeats the nickname in a whimper, curling his toes as another orgasm hits him as well. He never thought to hear this name from you again. He can’t handle it any other way than filling you with more of him.
There is so much of him inside you by now, having no way to escape because of his knot that your body reacts in the only way it knows how to survive. It opens up for his seed to go deeper. It trickles into the deepest parts of your sex organs, warming you from the inside out. It is like he is alive inside you, feeding you with the strongest drug you ever took. You think that you black out for a moment. You are still aware of what is happening to you, but it is hidden behind a thick layer of blurriness.
“Eh”, you let out, falling into the darkness gladly. It feels so good to do. There is something because you are aware of your orgasm, but there is also nothing. It is as if you are standing next to your body, watching it shake and tremble as he makes a home inside you.
And then there is nothing. Truly nothing. No more orgasmic pleasure, no more watching yourself. Just darkness.
“___? Hey, ___? Holy fuck, what’s wrong with you? ___, open your eyes please”, Jungkook’s distraught voice comes closer and closer, his hand on your face becomes clearer and clearer, “please ___, open your eyes, please. Oh god, what have I done? I should never have done this. I- Oh god ___ please, I’m sorry. Wake up, please.”
He shakes your head gently. It brings you back to reality. Your body regains the ability to feel.
“Jungkook”, you whimper, opening your eyes. You writhe instantly, throbbing around his knot happily.
“___ hey. Holy fuck, thank god. Hey”, he says, dropping his forehead against your temple and kissing the side of your face desperately, “I’m so glad that you’re back. I thought that I killed you.”
“No, just made me black out.”
“Why? Does it hurt? Are you in lots of pain?”
“No, just haven’t felt so good before. Ever. Kook, I”, you suddenly have to whimper your words, “I feel your cum inside my uterus. It’s so warm and alive and….right.”
“It is?” He whimpers as well, feeling weakened in emotion.
You nod your head. Jungkook sobs quietly, using the hold he has on your hand to guide your arm under your body and against your chest. Like this, he rolls your bodies to their sides, instantly cradling you against his chest while his trembling lips kiss any part of you that he can reach.
Your face, your neck, your shoulder, your arm, your back and the bite mark he left, your face again. Over and over he kisses each inch of you, whispering your name every now and then as if he is trying to make sure that he remembers who made him feel like this. As if he is trying to make his brain memorise who it was who made him experience his first knot.
He is still swollen, keeping everything inside you safely. It is still so intense, but suddenly it feels more emotionally intense than physically. Enough time must have passed for the fire to reduce the logs by lot. And all of a sudden you and he don’t feel the uncontrollable need to orgasm anymore. You still want to be close, moving your hips in emotionally needy wiggles in hopes of keeping his knot alive for as long as possible, but it is not to chase another orgasm. You want this to last because it feels so safe.
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. I don’t want this to end”, Jungkook confesses, holding you protectively.
“Me neither. I feel so safe like this.”
“Holy fuck, ___. What did we do?” he presses out, kissing your cheek over and over again.
“I don’t know.”
“I never knotted before. I never felt like this. Holy fuck, ___.”
“What is gonna happen to us now?”
“I don’t know. All I know is that I can’t let you go again. Ever. I don’t wanna fucking share you. Never. I’m trying so hard not to tell you that you’re mine ‘cause I promised you that this would never happen again.”
“Please don’t.”
“What?”
You turn your head, leaning deeper into his embrace. Like this, you feel his racing heart against your shoulder and you are entirely protected in his arms. His knotted cock throbs inside you as your eyes meet. The same playful, gentle boy of the past looks back at you, except that his once boyish features are mature and aged up. A gentle, adoring man stares back at you and you can’t seem to find your way out of his galaxy eyes.
“Please don’t promise me that this won’t happen again.” You cradle his cheek. “Don’t hold back on telling me that I’m yours.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying. You’re high from my cum, these aren’t your real feelings.”
“Why shouldn’t they be?”
“___, we-”
You put your thumb on his lips.
“We shouldn’t have done this, I know. You kept telling me as we kept doing this.”
Jungkook gives up in a sigh, having to chuckle afterwards. You giggle, cupping his cheek again.
“Just the tip. That’s what we agreed on. Just the tip”, he says.
You clench around his knot, touching your bloated stomach. You instantly guide his hand to it, wanting him to feel what he did to you. He purrs deeply, biting down on his lower lip. You grin goofily.
“Just the tip indeed.”
He laughs softly. You snicker and stub his nose with your own.
“This is the messiest and deepest tip I have ever given”, he jokes, making you laugh.
“Oh god, this was funny.”
“Mhm, I’m pretty funny”, he says and nuzzles his nose into your neck to tickle you gently.
You squeak and giggle, feeling happy beyond comparison. Jungkook ends his loving attack with kisses to your ear.
You sigh, melting into the affection. You and he lace fingers, using the position to melt closer.
Your droopy eyes stare into the flames while Jungkook relaxes you with soft kisses all over your neck, shoulder and back.
The thunderstorm stopped outside. It is already a little brighter. Fuck, so you were really trapped in this orgasmic state for a few hours. It felt as if so little time passed as it was happening.
“What is gonna happen now?” you whisper.
“Now? We’re gonna cuddle and I’ll be kissing you until you’re asleep.”
“I mean after that. Do we have to show Urquard that I’m claimed?”
“I guess. I haven’t thought that far into the future yet. But yes, he will probably want proof that you’re marked.”
“I’m scared. Do I have to get naked in front of him? And his pack? Will he put something in me to get a scent?”
“He can try if he wants to die.” Jungkook pulls you closer possessively. “You’re under my protection now. Okay? You won’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with and I’ll hunt down anyone who dares to overstep your boundaries. Even Urquard and his pack.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. I promise you.”
You close your eyes, spilling tears.
“Thank you.”
You never thought it possible to have your dreams fulfilled by Jungkook and yet here you are. You are being held and comforted by Jungkook and it feels like home.
“Don’t thank me. You’re mine. My darling ___ to keep safe. You have my body to protect you and my heart to find a home in.”
There is deep rooted honesty in his words, but you are suddenly too sleepy to ask him what he meant by them. There will still be another time. This wasn’t just a one time thing after all.
#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook fanfiction#jungkook scenario#jungkook oneshot#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#dom!jungkook#werewolf!jungkook#alpha!jungkook#bts smut#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts scenario#bts oneshot#bts x reader#bts x you#dom!bts#bangtan smut#bangtan fanfic#bangtan fanfiction#bangtan oneshot#bangtan scenario#bangtan x reader#bangtan x you#dom!bangtan#fanfic: kinktober24#fanfic: werewolf universe
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Leo’s Little Love : ̗̀➛ Charles LeClerc
summary: the birth of your daughter was supposed to be the happiest moment for you and charles, but both of you forgot about leo too
Your little family had almost been complete for quite some time. You, Charles and Leo. The perfect trio. Why fix something that isn’t broke? Why add to the chaos of your crazy lives? Well, because you both couldn’t wait to become parents.
It never was meant to be so soon, neither you or Charles had planned to fall pregnant quite so suddenly but your life had always been mayhem, and pregnancy was just another cog to add to the wheel of things that you needed to juggle together.
It had been touch and go for quite some time as your baby’s arrival loomed. With just two weeks to go Charles had never been happier to see the start of the summer break which meant at last he could be glued to your side and be there just in case anything happened.
Being at home was something that Charles very quickly got used to, laid out on the sofa with you tucked into his side. Charles didn’t always get his own way though, with Leo snuggled just underneath your bump to block Charles holding onto it.
“I wonder how he’s going to be.”
Your attention was pulled from your book when Charles spoke, following his gaze down to where Leo laid, snoring lightly with his eyes tight shut.
“What do you mean?” You asked him.
“I’m just thinking about when the baby arrives, do you think Leo will respond well to not being the centre of our attention anymore?” Charles questioned.
Your eyes flickered between Charles and Leo and your bump as you pondered Charles’ question. Truthfully, it was something that you had never quite thought about before, but if there was one word that you’d use to describe Leo, it was definitely needy.
“I think he’ll enjoy having someone else to be around,” you spoke after a few moments.
“He’ll definitely love an extra body to cuddle up to.”
It was almost as if he knew that you were talking about him, as Leo’s head lifted up and his wide eyes looked at you both as if to remind you that he could hear everything.
“You know, I’ve got a feeling that Leo and this baby might just end up being the best of friends, I definitely think we’re going to have trouble on our hands.”
Ever since that conversation you pictured how your family, or especially Leo, would adapt to the baby, counting down the days until all those dream scenarios became a reality.
And just a couple of weeks later your little girl arrived. It was tougher than you could have ever imagined, but with Charles not leaving your side for the many hours that you were in labour for, your family was soon complete. Charles was an emotional mess beside you, but through his tears he knew that he’d just experienced the best moments of his entire life.
You might’ve been a little bit bias, but your baby girl was the definition of perfect. Straight away you were drawn to her bright eyes, a striking resemblance to Charles’. They captured your attention, just like Charles’ had done many years ago when the two of you first met.
And as Charles held her for the first time and you got your first look at the two of them side by side, you knew you had a daddy’s girl on your hands. She was instantly besotted, settled and comfortable in Charles’ strong hold, almost as if you were the one who was intruding on the moment between your husband and your child despite being the one to bring her into the world.
“It’s a good job we’ve got Leo otherwise I think I’d be outnumbered at home with you two,” you joked as Charles made himself comfortable.
You knew deep down though you wouldn’t have Leo for long, as the two of you arrived home with your daughter. It had been a couple of days since he got to see you and Charles, unaware that a new arrival was waiting on the other side of the door to greet him too.
Together you took things slowly as you returned to your apartment, Charles took Leo into your bedroom whilst you settled in the living room with your daughter. Once you were sure that she was settled you called through to Charles who poked his head out from behind the bedroom door.
“Are you absolutely sure about doing this now?” Charles nervously asked you.
“Charles, we’re going to have to do it sooner or later. We might as well get it over with whilst they’re both pretty settled.”
He trusted you more than anyone, and so Charles decided to open the bedroom door and allow Leo to come out. It was as if nothing was going on as if strolled through the apartment, that was until his eye was caught by the carrier that sat on your living room floor. Charles came over and sat beside you, his hand on your thigh as Leo began to inspect.
Leo had a little sniff around the carrier as he familiarised with the something new that had entered his home. After giving him a moment you reached into the carrier and lifted your daughter out, holding her just in front of where Leo was.
It took a little while for Leo to stop fussing over your daughter, looking up at you and Charles. His eyes told the two of you that he approved of your little girl, walking away from her once he was happy with what was going on.
“See, I told you there was nothing to worry about.”
Your words were truer than ever though that night as Charles laid on your bed with his daughter laid just beside him. You walked through after taking an overdue shower, surprised to see that there was another addition to your bed. They say that three is a crowd, but not in this case.
Your heart felt like it could burst as your daughter laid between Charles on her left, and Leo on her right, his head almost touching hers as if to reassure her that he was right beside her too.
Charles’ eyes knew exactly where you were looking. You were supposed to be annoyed that your side of the bed had been stolen, but instead it was a memory that you wanted to snapshot for the rest of your life.
You were sure that you had never seen anything so beautiful in your life, Leo had made sure your daughter was well protected and surrounded by love. Even Charles couldn’t get as close to her as Leo was, firmly establishing himself as her number one.
Just like you, Charles couldn’t fault the scene that was unfolding in front of you though. Things had gone better than either of you could have ever imagined, all of the concerns that Charles had had long been forgotten now that your family of four were all home together.
“Why do I feel like we’re never going to be allowed near our daughter ever again?” Charles laughed across at you.
“I think out of the three of us, she’s definitely Leo’s love before she’s ours,” you added, unable to wipe the smile from your face. “I think they’re going to be the best of friends.”
Charles hummed in agreement with you, tilting his head down to watch them both once again. If he could pause time forever, he absolutely would. It was all that he had ever dreamt of, and so much more.
“We’ve got the two most beautiful children in the world.”
˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗
#f1#f1 imagine#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 reaction#formula one#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc x reader#formula one x you#formula x reader#formula 1 drabble#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula 1 fic#formula 1 fanfic#f1 drabble#f1 fluff#f1 x you
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𝔖𝔬𝔪𝔢 𝔖𝔢𝔡𝔲𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔳𝔢 𝔓𝔩𝔞𝔠𝔢𝔪𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔰
Lilith aspecting Moon
This is a very powerful placement for women specifically. The moon, which is your emotions, connected to the unconscious self, habits, comfort and femininity is connected to the point in your chart that is powerful and dark, a part fuelled by pain, and all about transmutation. These woman often have a very intriguing essence about them. Strong and seductive. It's like you are playing with fire. She enjoys being a little off putting and knows exactly how to be enticing yet intimidating all in one.
Neptune/Venus/Pluto in the 3rd House
The third house is often overlooked when people are speaking on seduction and sex appeal in astrology. People are so focused on visual they miss a key point. Seduction includes all the senses. Someone being beautiful doesn't necessarily mean they are seductive. It's the way someone moves, speaks, the things they say and don't say, how they hold themselves along with present themselves. It's subtle.
This brings me to why the third house comes into play. It inductees how we communicate. As mentioned words can be very seductive. Having planets like Neptune and Venus will give someone a sweet and sensual demeanour when talking. Neptune is very receptive and often these people are incredible at being able to asses the needs of the person they are taking to, it's a very intuitive placement. Neptune is also all about fantasy. Playing into a role you project onto them.
Pluto in the third's seductive tactics are centred around power snd control. Manipulation if you will - not always in the worst sense. They are good at digging for information getting to the base of the persons psyche that they are speaking to. Once again it's about understanding the people around them. You can see how Neptune and Pluto have this in common but the way they use this is different.
Scorpio Rising
I feel like you guys know this one has to be mentioned. And I am sure I have written about this before. However I feel it's important to explain why this rising sign specifically holds such seductive energy. I often hear people talk about their eyes, which is very true. But it goes much deeper than just appearance. Scorpio naturally rules over the 8th house, a house that is very deep and dark. It's shrouded by mystery and taboo, along with being a sexually charged house. Now think about all of these themes being brought into the 1st house. Being at the forefront of someones being in not only the way they look, but they way they carry themselves and interact with the world around them. It's very provocative energy.
But there is more. Though people may assume that because of this scorpios may give off an overt sexual energy, its not quite as obvious one one may think. Whilst there is this air of sex appeal around them, this often doesn't come from being so open and bold about these things, but rather from holding a little something back. As we know scorpio is about the things below the surface, secrets, privacy. This creates a dynamic where people can sense this energy, however they must peel back the layers and investigate more to truly see what these people are like. This can create a push and pull, a little bit of an enigma. It piques the intrigue of people and encourages the chase.
Mercury quintile/Bi-quintile Mars, Pluto or Neptune & Lilith in some cases
Very similar to the previously mentioned third house, Mercury rules over communication, along wit the way we think and process things. Having a quintile or Bi-quintile aspecting mercury it shows us that someone has a particular skill around communication. I have already explained why having Pluto and Neptune connected to areas of your chart dealing with communication creates seduction.
I also included Mars, as Mars is a planet of strategy. Often working towards a goal these people like to win, and are very good at 'winning people over' in conversation. Mars is more of a dominant planet so domination is a tactic often used by these people. Sometimes being commanded is sexy. These people speak strongly which is sexy.
The reason why I put Lilith as a case by case aspect is because as we know, Lilith often states as a place of wounding in a natal chart. It's only after someone has healed those wounds and understood the source of power that that area of their chart is with Lilith sitting there that they can truly start to embody and experience this. Though I will say having Lilith in a quintile or Bi-quintile is often easier. When developed Lilith is a very untamed energy, a little wild and unpredictable. Two traits that are extremely enticing.
Thank you all for reading my loves,
Pureastrowisdom x
Also a quick notice - I have a TikTok account under the name of
.plutonian.priestess
I would love if you would go and follow me on there too where I can post more image based content and eventually go into video style content too.
I am thinking of putting a face to my name and my account as I want you guys to see the person behind my work
#astrology blog#astro notes#astrology#astro observations#astro community#astroblr#natal chart#astro tumblr#lilith asteroid#lilith astrology#scorpio rising#mercury aspects#mercury astrology#third house astrology#3rd house#pluto in astrology#lilith aspects#moon aspects
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𝐓𝐲𝐩𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐬 | (𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 2)
➳❥ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬: Kuchiki Byakuya, Hitsugaya Toshiro, Shuhei Hisagi, Aizen Sosuke, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, Coyote Starrk
𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: Part 1 | Part 3
𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐠𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
◈ Kuchiki Byakuya — Subtle Gentleman Simp
˚₊‧꒰ა You have his entire heart and soul the moment he decides to pursue you. There’s no such thing as doubt when it comes to his affections, he is secure with his feelings towards you and will accept no criticism.
˚₊‧꒰ა He will gift you poems he personally stayed up all night writing because you’re the only person worth losing sleep over. His gestures and signs of affection will be subtle but meaningful, and he always prefers to present his gifts to you in person to observe your reactions.
˚₊‧꒰ა “Allow me to assist you. It would be my honour.” The door opened, chairs pulled out, carpet rolled, an arm out for you to take—you name it and Byakuya will see to it that it is possible. His gestures will reflect his elegant and noble upbringing. He might present you with a beautifully arranged bouquet or a new kimono made from the finest cloth.
˚₊‧꒰ა Never speaks about your relationship with others, it remains private. What transpires between you two is your business, so you will never have to hear rumours or whispers floating around. It is one of his many ways of displaying his protectiveness.
˚₊‧꒰ა When it comes to verbally expressing his love, there’s no denying that his words are raw and filled with passion and devotion. You were his everything and the centre of his life. He prefers to express them during private moments when you are invited to his estate and having tea or lunch. “You are important to me. I hope you know that.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Prefers to keep his duties as a shinigami private, not wanting to worry you with his activities that nearly cost him his life or rendered him immobile. The look on your face when you worry or tear up is something Byakuya doesn’t like at all. He believes tears or worry should never be of your concern, you should be happy and smiling always.
˚₊‧꒰ა To Byakuya, if someone were to let him know that he was a simp, he would simply shake his head, denying the terms and claiming that he was merely doing what anyone should when in love with another. Probably one of the rare times he has openly expressed his emotions.
◈ Hitsugaya Toshiro — Tsundere Simp
˚₊‧꒰ა Even with his tsundere personality, he’s mature and it shows in how he cares for you in subtle ways. He might bring you lunch because he enjoys your company but doesn’t want to outrightly say it, so he would probably resort to a lie. “It’s not like I care or anything, but I noticed you forgot your lunch, so I brought you something.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Get flustered when Matsumoto brings up his feelings, whether you’re around or not. Often, he can be found stammering and blushing like crazy, threatening to turn the entire division into an icy tundra if she didn’t shut up.
˚₊‧꒰ა Protective yet constantly in denial but downplaying his actions. “Stay behind me. It’s not because I’m worried about you, it’s just my job.” Yeah, sure right. That’s his famous excuse anytime he doesn’t want to get busted, or he did get busted.
˚₊‧꒰ა If you were ever in the same room with him, he would S T A R E at you from across the room once you weren’t aware, and if Matsumoto noticed and called him out, the entire room becomes an icy blizzard. If there’s a window, he might jump out instead.
˚₊‧꒰ა Ah yes, the jealous little icicle doesn’t appreciate when you talk about the time or activity you do with others. The entire time he’s wondering if to pay that person a visit and turn them into a popsicle. Instead, he grumbles, “Why are you spending so much time with them? That’s distracting.” As if spending time with him won’t be the same…
˚₊‧꒰ა Receive his sweet acts of kindness with a teaspoon of grumpiness to hide his embarrassment. Would offer you something and look away to hide his blush. If you tease him, he will mutter about not getting the wrong idea. At the same time, he will dish out compliments with a side of teasing to mask his softness.
◈ Shuhei Hisagi — Shy Simp
˚₊‧꒰ა If ever you need someone to spend some quality time with in peace, Hisagi is your guy. With him, the quietness isn’t awkward at all since it prevents him from saying or doing anything awkward yet enjoying your presence.
˚₊‧꒰ა He’s a bit shy and humble about his feelings, often downplaying his actions and blushing when complimented. He’ll dart his eyes around, looking anywhere but you as the redness in his face grows intensely. “It’s nothing, really. I just wanted to help.”
˚₊‧꒰ა As shy as Hisagi is, he is undeniably supportive and encouraging. Quiet yet meaningful words of encouragement, never letting anyone else say otherwise and will stand up for you. The sweetest cheerleader ever.
˚₊‧꒰ა You get the opportunity to be first in line when listening to him play his newest pieces. He would hesitate to ask if you wanted to listen, but the gleam of excitement in your eyes would melt away his fear. He would happily sit for hours playing his guitar for you.
˚₊‧꒰ა He thinks about you quite often and makes the effort to spend time with you during his breaks, be it lunch, having tea, sparring with you, or even walking you back to your room. You would also receive a few tokens from him aside from a new song, like a new obi of your favourite colour.
˚₊‧꒰ა He goes weak when you make the first move to hold his hand or trace his tattoos. Any form of physical affection makes his knees buckle, and to make it even better, call him by a nickname you made for your personal use.
˚₊‧꒰ა He’s so caring and sweet, such a cutie pie. Always looking out for your safety and well-being. If you’re scared of the dark, he won’t make fun. If you prefer your food to be a certain temperature, he’ll understand. If you have allergies, say no more.
◈ Aizen Sosuke — Manipulative and Obsessive Simp (obvious ain’t it)
˚₊‧꒰ა This man gives such a yandere aura when it comes to how obsessed he is with you and will rarely overtly act as a ‘simp’ in the traditional sense, instead positioning himself as a figure who is ‘above’ such displays, all the while secretly swooning over you.
˚₊‧꒰ა He’s always watching—not in a creepy stalkerish vibes—and carefully studying you, making mental notes. If you catch him staring, he’ll give you this bemused smile as though you’re missing the obvious.
˚₊‧꒰ა It feels as though he’s always hypnotising you each time he speaks—he’s not even purposefully doing so, it’s just Aizen, a natural at swooning anyone with his voice and charm. His words always ensnare your thoughts and sometimes hold an unsettling level of devotion. “You intrigue me, more than anyone I’ve ever met. I find it difficult to pull away from you. Not that I want to.”
˚₊‧꒰ა “Interesting I find you here on one of my evening walks. Perhaps share this time with me?” As if he didn’t coincidentally plan the encounter, and the majority of the others, to pass them off as accidents. Nothing is random with this man.
˚₊‧꒰ა Listen, this man lives to make you flustered and then act smug about it—he knows what he’s doing. Like what is the reason for standing chest to chest, hand cupping your chin, tilting your head upwards to meet his eyes, lips inches apart, just to tell you, “I’ll be heading out today, be safe.” (so we weren’t going to kiss ⚆_⚆)
˚₊‧꒰ა If you show any form of affection or interest in him, he’d pretend to be nonchalant, but his mind is racing with a thousand schemes to deepen the connection and ensure that you never stray. “I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. After all, I have a way of making people see things my way. But it is nice to be noticed in such a way.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Please, don’t go talking to another person and showing interest or letting them show interest (for the sake of that person). His jealousy is SO subtle but unnerving. You could feel the lasers from his eyes melting that person a thousand times over—it’s impossible to miss.
˚₊‧꒰ა “You belong with me, don’t you? I’ve always known it.” You are a part of his plan as his equal. It’s one of his ways of ensuring that you are well-protected and looked after. As twisted as his feelings might be, he has the obsessive need to have you by his side.
◈ Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez — Aggressively Seductive Simp
˚₊‧꒰ა He’s aggressive from start to end with his compliments and actions, but they’re seductive. He’ll mess up your hair, lightly push you around/manhandle to show his affections. “You’re tougher than you look. I like that.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Tends to come off as emotionally constipated because in a way he is. Knows that he’s interested in you but isn’t one for those things humans call love and doesn’t know how to properly express it. He does have his unexpected softness, like giving you a coat or blanket if you’re cold. “Here, take this. It’s not like I care or anything.”
˚₊‧꒰ა His concerns come off as aggressive but toned down. “Don’t hurt yourself brat!” “Are you crazy? Do you have a death wish or something?” “If you touch me, I’ll fight you!” “Let’s fight to see who’s stronger!” That last one was only because he wanted to be close to you.
˚₊‧꒰ა He bites. He bites but will purr if you stroke his hair and then jerks away because you caught him slipping. Silently judges but loves the attention he receives.
˚₊‧꒰ა Loves to stand behind you and whisper in your ear with his deep ass voice but holds you by your waist so you can’t escape his grasp. He gets off on watching as you shiver. The compliments are worth making your knees buckle because they aren’t for the faint–hearted. “I don’t do this for just anyone, so consider yourself special.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Loves to admire you in your attire and asks you to do a twirl so he can see every inch of you. Grimmjow will also place his hands on your waist and make you face the mirror to stare at your beauty. Bites and licks his lips when he looks you up and down.
˚₊‧꒰ა Grimmjow’s eyes are always locked on your figure no matter where you are. You can feel his eyes roaming your body—he likes to say it’s for protection reasons. Hates to admit the truth whenever he's called out, but he’s also a jealous kitty—ready to fight any and everyone.
˚₊‧꒰ა Goes to find you every time he leaves for a mission and when he returns, he holds you close and breathes in your scent. He’ll bury his nose into your hair and press your body close to his, murmuring about how he missed your smell and you’re his.
◈ Coyote Starrk — Laid-back Simp
˚₊‧꒰ა His form of affection would be so relaxed and casual—there’s no need for him to rush or display his interest in any grand forms of affection. A pat on your head, a gentle arm around your waist or him resting his chin on your head, as he pulls you in close.
˚₊‧꒰ა Cherishes you and your company once he realised that you weren’t vaporising anytime you stood beside him and often invites you to join him for a nap or to relax. He likes the warmth you bring. “It’s nice having you around. Makes things less…lonely.”
˚₊‧꒰ა Would keep you safe from any hollows and the other Arrancar who decided to harm you. Not wanting to get into any conflicts, but only because you were important to him, he would get serious.
˚₊‧꒰ა Starrk has a way of giving you…unenthusiastic compliments though they mean well and are sincere. It’s just that his tone of delivery is nonchalant and his expression mimics boredom, however his eyes are soft.
˚₊‧꒰ა He’s not one to hover, preferring his silence and alone time, yet he always lets you know that if you ever need him, don’t hesitate to come find him and let him know. He’s always around.
˚₊‧꒰ა You have to deal with Lilinette too often whenever you’re around him. The constant teasing and poking about how soft Starrk was, or how you had him wrapped around your finger, earned her a scolding from him. She enjoys setting you two up in awkward situations just to get a laugh out of it.
˚₊‧꒰ა Occasionally, you will see his seriousness making an appearance. Mostly after a near confrontation with another hollow and you almost being severely wounded, or an argument, he would express his care and concern. “I may not show it often, but I care about you.”
©satsugacafé 2024: no permission to repost, plagiarise, copy, or translate my work onto any other platform or this one.
#˚₊‧꒰ა satsugacafé ໒꒱ ‧₊˚#kuchiki byakuya x reader#hitsugaya toshiro x reader#shuhei hisahi x reader#hisagi x reader#aizen sosuke x reader#aizen x reader#grimmjow jaegerjaquez x reader#grimmjow x reader#coyote starrk x reader#starrk x reader#hitsugaya toshiro headcanons#kuchiki byakuya headcanons#shuhei hisagi headcanons#aizen sosuke headcanons#grimmjow headcanons#coyote starrk headcanons#bleach x reader#bleach headcanons#bleach imagines#bleach x you#bleach x y/n#bleach
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jade if I’m not too late and requests are still open, can you write bombshell!reader and spence’s first kiss? secretly I think it would be funny if the team saw a hickey on her neck or something that she didn’t expect but oh how I love how soft she is for spence
ty for your request ♡ fem, 1.2k
"It's classic, comfortable anger-excitation," you say, hitting the flat of your ballpoint pen against your fingertip, a repetitive tap. "But his geographical profile is everywhere. No one place is untouched, but if he's as practised as we think he is, he'd kill away from home."
"Then he's not practised, he's an expert," Hotch says in the seat beside you. "He knows to divert our attention."
Your tapping increases. Spencer takes a few steps back and puts his hand over yours. You glance up at him. He mimes a deep breath for you to copy. You do it without complaint.
You're so focused on being perfect that sometimes you forget to breathe. You're very good at being perfect, in Spencer's opinion, perfect hair, perfect face, perfect frenetic hands. And you're doubly perfect at whatever this is, smiling at him with an unquantifiable emotion in what's probably the prettiest set of eyes on planet Earth.
Spencer puts your pen on your notebook and goes back to his board. The locations of each murder are tacked into a map. You weren't kidding when you said everywhere.
You're in one of the poorest places in America, and the police station reflects that. There's no conference room for you guys to work undisturbed, and the beat cops and deputy alike can hear and see everything you're doing. Most have the manners to leave you alone, but you're you; you tend to draw attention.
You've taken up the pen again, clicking and unclicking incessantly. It's an annoying sound but you're not aware that you're doing it, too determined on cracking the case before anything worse happens. Your team knows to ignore you, or even to disarm you. Emily snags the pen from your hand with a friendly laugh. "Jesus, you're tightly wound today."
"Mm," you murmur, struggling to pull yourself from your notes. A few more seconds and you look up with a blinding smile, "That's because Spencer skimped on my neck massage last night."
"Come on, pretty boy," Morgan says, though his heart isn't truly in it, "I thought you knew better."
Spencer shakes his head. You and Spencer had very separate hotel rooms and no sensual touching occurred, but he loves how happy this running joke makes you, so he stays quiet.
"He knows everything," you say, backtracking, "That's why he's gonna make me a cup of coffee. He knows exactly how I like it."
He leaves to make you a cup of coffee, but he was heading that way anyway for his own. He's thinking to himself that coffee is a bad idea and that he wishes he was better at saying no to you when you follow him in, your arms already open as you close the two or three steps to his chest and hug him over the shoulders.
"You didn't say anything when you left," you worry, your embrace overwhelming, sweet and soft and with a loving squeeze to round it off. "I wasn't being bossy, was I?"
You can be, but not this time. "Shut up, you know I'll make you a cup of coffee whenever you want it."
"That so?" you ask.
There's an excess energy you haven't managed to kick today racing through you. He can see the restlessness in your smile, no matter how glitzy.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
Spencer's poorly kept secret is that he's obsessed with you. You dote on him, you tease him, you torture him, but Spencer wants all of it and more. He likes being the centre of your attention, loves how your fond flirtation has changed to plain affection, and he would do anything you asked him to if it meant you were gonna kiss his cheek at the end. He thinks you're beautiful and electric and a thousand yards out of his league, and he thinks you're the nicest woman they ever made under all your bravado because not once have you encouraged that line of thought —you like him for him. You don't want him to change. You don't need anything from him he can't give to you.
His simple question transforms you, your glossy lips perking immediately into a smile. "Why wouldn't I be okay?"
"You seem tense. I've never given a massage before, but I can actually try," he offers.
Your hand cups his cheek, your voice aglow with a saccharine quality, "You're lovely, that's why. Maybe I'll take you up on it later–"
"It's not like–"
You'd been attempting a sweet thank you, and Spencer was brushing it off, but somewhere in the middle of it you'd gone up on tiptoes to kiss his cheek. Spencer —idiot, uncoordinated, inexperienced, is going to hate himself later Spencer— turned away from your touch to argue with you, directing your lips against his.
Soft, sticky, pretty lips pressed to his.
You set back on your heels quickly. Your eyes are wide, beautiful but flared in shock, a sheepishness tugging your brows together as you say, "I'm so sorry."
"It's my fault," he says quickly, braceleting your wrist in his hand, "I'm sorry–"
You both lean back in for a second kiss at the same time. Spencer's head angled down and your chin tipped ever so slightly upward, you close your eyes as he closes his, completely silent. It's not often you're quiet. Spencer doesn't mean to, but he kisses too hard, too much, forcing your hand from his cheek as he grabs you either side of the head to keep you in his reach.
Your breath comes out in a huff that lights his nerve endings on fire, the barest hint of your voice tacked to it like a sigh of relief, like you're taking the edge off in the circle of his arms. Spencer's hand slides behind your head to hook you in, your lips parting at the seam from the pressure. You feel the heat of him and respond with vigour, your hand a nagging demand at the small of his back, pulling him closer, closer, as his other hand trails down your arm.
Your elbow bumps the coffee mugs, it really is his fault, and you spring away from him like you think you've been caught. Smiling, a kid with her hand in the cookie jar, you throw your gaze around the room to check you're still alone before stepping forward to laugh against his mouth.
That's a good sound. A great reaction. You have more patience than Spencer, dotting kisses thick with lip gloss up into his top lip, your mouth just open enough for him to feel faint.
"It was really an accident," he says between shorter, kinder kisses.
"I know," you murmur, words smushed. You steal a last rather frantic one before you stop, breathing funny, hands smoothing down the hair you'd mussed initially with sorry tenderness. "Was that okay?"
He puts his hand on your hip, refusing to gratify what feels like a silly question with a response when you can't not know he's been wanting to kiss you for weeks. Maybe months. "Are you sure you're fine?"
You smile at him like you know something he doesn't. "I'm sure, Spence. I think I just needed to do that."
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds#criminal minds fic#criminal minds x reader
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lucky three — sjy & psh
bf!jake x fem!bodied yn x bf!sunghoon
warnings: established poly relationships, mlm ( 1 kiss sorry 🧌 ), kisses? idk just fluff mostly (98%) , maybe petnames?? not proofread, anything else lmk!
synopsis: on a rainy afternoon, you and your boyfriends realise how lucky the three of you are to have found each other
wc: 1.4k
a/n: idk guys its just my bday… its been raining for the past two days and i badly need this to happen to me + what aj wrote in her guess who fic 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 read it now.
jake’s arm drapes lazily around your shoulders, while sunghoon’s head rests comfortably on your lap. the three of you fit together as if you have been carved out from the same piece of clay. nothing ever feels incomplete when you are all together.
"tell me again why we decided to stay in today?" jake asks, his voice low but with a playful lilt as he tilts his head toward you. he traces lazy patterns with his fingers along your arm, the touch sending electric warmth through your skin. he is always tactile — always touching, as if afraid you will slip through his fingers.
"because it's raining, and i love the sound of it," you reply softly, your hand brushing through sunghoon’s raven-black hair. he closes his eyes, his lips tugging upward slightly, clearly enjoying the soothing motion of your fingers. sunghoon is quieter — thoughtful; his affection comes in soft waves, almost unnoticeable until you are pulled under and engulfed by the depth of his love.
"you love the rain, but jake hates it," sunghoon finally speaks, his eyes still closed. his voice deep, resonating through the quiet atmosphere of the room.
" i don’t hate it. i just don’t love it like she does," jake teases back, glancing at sunghoon before turning his gaze to you. his eyes, always full of light, sparkle with a mischievous glint.
it has been like this for a while now — your lives intertwined so naturally. your relationship feels like a melody, each of you three contributing with a different note and yet when you’re together, you create the perfect harmony. sunghoon brings calmness and stability, a quiet strength. jake is the warmth, the laughter, the chaos and you’re the centre, grounding them both in a way they never realise they need.
you shift slightly, pulling your legs under you and leaning back into jake’s chest. you sigh, contentment washing over your face like the rain outside.
"you know," you say softly, "i don’t think I've ever been this happy."
jake's fingers stop their movement as he leans down to press a soft kiss against your temple. "that’s because you’ve got both of us," he whispers against your skin, his breath warm.
sunghoon opens his eyes at this, a small smirk playing on his lips. "he’s not wrong," he says, shifting so that he can sit up and face you. his eyes meet yours, dark and intense, but filled with so much love it nearly takes your breath away. "you’re our everything."
you feel a lump form in your throat at his words. it’s moments like this — when they are so open, so raw with their emotions — that remind you just how deep your connection goes. the world outside doesn’t understand it;
some people judge, others whisper behind your backs. but none of that matters when it is just the three of you, like now, tangled in each other’s arms, completely content with the love you have found.
"i still remember the first time we told you," jake says suddenly, a soft laugh escaping his lips. "i thought for sure you’d reject the idea."
"reject you? never," you respond, shaking your head "you know i could never say no to either of you."
sunghoon raises an eyebrow, playful skepticism in his eyes. "you hesitated, though. for a second."
"i didn’t hesitate," you insist, but there is a teasing tone in your voice. "i was just…surprised, that’s all. it’s not every day you realise two guys you love are willing to share a relationship with each other and with you."
"and you never looked back," jake adds with a grin, his eyes filled with pride. "you belong with us."
sunghoon’s hand finds yours, gently pulling it into his lap, thumb tracing the back of your hand. his touch is always soothing, like an anchor in a storm. "we belong with you, too," he corrects, his voice tender.
your relationship is unconventional — some would even say complicated. but it isn’t for you. for you, sunghoon and jake it’s something as natural as breathing. there are no jealousy-fueled fights, no insecurities you haven’t already talked through. communication has always been your greatest strength. yes, it isn’t always easy, but you make it work because none of you can imagine life any other way.
"you two are everything to me," you say softly, looking between them. "i mean it. i don’t care what anyone else says."
jake's hand tightens on your shoulder, pulling you even closer, his lips brushing against your ear. "we’re yours. always."
sunghoon nods, his expression soft but serious. "we’re in this for the long haul, yn. you know that, right?"
"i know," you whisper, your heart swelling with emotion. "and i wouldn’t have it any other way."
the rain outside seems to slow, softening into a light drizzle as if mirroring the quiet calm that has settled over the room. jake’s eyes meet sunghoon’s, a silent understanding passing between them before jake speaks.
jake’s voice is barely above a whisper, but it carries all the weight of the moment. “come here,” he says, his fingers lightly tilting your chin to face him.
shift slightly, your heart racing with a mix of anticipation and love that bubbles beneath the surface. the connection between the three of you is palpable, the air thick with unspoken emotions. jake’s lips brush against yours in the softest of kisses — tender, almost hesitant. it’s sweet, gentle and yet it sends shivers down your spine, the kind that makes you melt into him even further.
sunghoon watches quietly, his dark eyes studying the two of you with a calm intensity. there’s no jealousy, only a quiet reverence for the love you share. after a moment, he reaches out, his hand resting on the side of your face, guiding you toward him. his lips meet yours next, the kiss deeper, slower. where jake’s kiss was light and playful, sunghoon’s is grounding — steady, like him. his thumb caresses your cheek as he pulls back, resting his forehead against yours for a moment, both of you breathing in sync.
"you’re so beautiful," sunghoon murmurs, his voice deep and quiet.
jake presses a kiss to your shoulder before leaning back into the couch, watching the two of you with a soft smile. “i could stay like this forever,” he says, his voice breaking the quiet but only adding to the warmth surrounding all three of you. “just the three of us, like this.”
you let out a soft laugh, leaning into the warmth of jake’s chest and resting a hand on sunghoon’s knee. “we really do fit together, don’t we?”
sunghoon nods in agreement, his fingers running absentmindedly along the hem of your shirt, a comforting gesture. “perfectly,” he says softly, almost as if he’s still amazed by how seamlessly you all connect.
jake chuckles, his hand slipping down to intertwine with yours. “we’re like puzzle pieces. weird, unconventional puzzle pieces, but we fit.” his grin widens, eyes sparkling mischievously. “and no one else can figure it out but us.”
the three of you share a soft laugh, the kind that fills the room with a warmth even the rain can’t dampen. outside, the storm has softened to a gentle drizzle, the rhythmic patter of raindrops on the window creating a peaceful lullaby.
sunghoon leans in again, this time pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before turning to jake. there’s a pause, an unspoken invitation hanging between them before jake smiles and leans forward. their kiss is unhurried, filled with a mutual tenderness and understanding that never fails to make your heart swell. when they part it’s with a soft sigh, their foreheads resting together for just a moment longer.
you watch them, feeling a deep sense of contentment settle in your chest, you’ve never felt more at peace, more loved than in moments like these — wrapped in the arms of the two people who mean the world to you.
“let’s stay like this a little longer,” you suggest quietly, not ready to break the spell of the lazy afternoon.
jake chuckles softly, pulling you closer to him. “i’m not going anywhere.”
sunghoon hums in agreement, his thumb still tracing soothing circles on the back of your hand. “we’re right where we’re supposed to be.”
and with that, the three of you settle back into the quiet comfort of each other’s embrace, the rain outside fading into the background as your world becomes nothing but the love and warmth that you share.
it’s moments like these that remind you just how lucky you are — to have found not just one, but two souls that complete you in ways you never thought possible.
#— 💭 mars ; written work#enhypen poly#enhypen jakehoon#enhypen fic#enhypen fluff#enhypen scenarios#enhypen imagines#enhypen x reader#enhypen sunghoon fic#sunghoon soft thoughts#sunghoon soft hours#sunghoon fluff#sunghoon x reader#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon scenarios#sunghoon fic#jake scenarios#jake fluff#jake imagines#jake x reader#sim jake fluff#jake sim fic#jakehoon#enhypen soft hours#jake soft thoughts#jake soft hours#sim jake soft
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bkg jerking off over you while you sit there and look pretty🫶🏾
☆༉ — KATSUKI BAKUGOU. expressive.
about. bakugou never gets good at controlling how his emotions sit on his face — especially when he’s close to a well earned release.
warnings. minors, ageless and blank blogs do not interact! smut, vaginal sex, squirting, pulling out as a contraceptive method (don’t do this), male masturbation, cumplay, breeding kink, mentions of pregnancy, slight overstimulation, fem!reader, pro hero!bakugou.
i imagine that bakugou never really gets good at controlling his facial expressions. usually, it’s super easy to tell when he’s pissed, because he has his fangs bared and his thick, dark eyebrows pinch together at the centre of his forehead. when he’s sad, he’s either unconsciously frowning or pouting — which isn’t an uncommon sight if you think about it. when he’s happy or calm, there’s a light that reflects in his ruby framed eyes to the point where they shine across a room, his soft lips upturned into a small smirk with not a trace of doubt laid across his face.
you think, however, that katsuki is most beautiful when his body is hung over yours and he’s about to cum.
“you cummin’ baby? y’ gonna make a mess on my cock. milk your cock f’me?” you love how strained the blonde’s voice gets when he’s close, caught in the ridges of this throat and pierced by the occasional high pitched whine here and there. katsuki always makes sure that you get there before him, fumbling with your swollen clit nestled between your soaked puffy folds — using the tips of his fingers to catch whatever viscous track of juices slips out of you and around his throbbing girth before he rubs it back into the little nub.
the air feels like it been sucked out from his lungs when your wet pussy selfishly sucks him in, clenching down on every ridge as if she doesn’t want to let go. your eyes disappear into the darkness of your skull, mouth lewdly hanging open wide enough for bakugou to spit into it. he immediately licks into your mouth afterwards, languidly rolling his hips into you with vicious wet smacks to the same tune.
he roughs you up with spit swapping kisses, hardly giving you any room to breathe. you cry and gasp into bakugou’s open mouth, sucking on his tongue and filling him with your salacious siren’s song that only gets higher and higher with each step you take towards orgasm. he follows each movement of your mouth like he’s after the pied piper, chasing the heat of your tongue against his while his rough hands work you into a mating press — legs thrown over his shoulder and cock so deep inside you, you can practically feel him in your throat.
his lips feel like heaven, pillowy and plush as they move with yours expertly, knowing just how to kiss you — eliciting a bright fire in your lower tummy that sets you ablaze from the inside out. squeezing around every blue, pulsating vein that twists its way around bakugou’s fat, milky shaft, you take what your given and squealing as it hammers into your g-spot over and over and over again until your mind blanks he’s claimed rule over your every thought like a barbarian fighting over land.
“k-kats! daddy — ‘m gonna,” you drool the words across his open mouth like an erotic flash flood, your sanity dwindling into nothing and your resolve crumbling — he works into your sopping heat, stretching you open, pounding away at that embarrassingly creamy cunt, just brushing at your cervix. poor you, you can’t help but sob at the unruly rhythm, your mount licking and unlocking to accommodate for the curve of katsuki’s dick that fills you up just right.
it’s not long before your body fails you, and you’re cumming right then and there. white flashes behind your eyes and drowns out your vision, a scream of your lover’s name loudly rips through you while your release trickles out of you unexpectedly.
“shit, that’s it. all over me, all fuckin’ over me.” bakugou punctuates each of his breathless words with a sharp thrust into the depths of your squelching insides, watching the way you gush and stream around him and onto the bec with a hung jaw and drool seeping out of the corners of his mouth. once you’re spent and fucked beyond, he pulls out slowly — both of you mewling at the cool air on your hot and raw sexes.
now, you both know that pulling out isn’t an effective method of contraception — but you’re both young and dumb and kid on believe in fate. but it doesn’t make it any less hot when katsuki pumps his dick over you to get off.
your boyfriend wastes no time in grabbing hold of his cock — sticky and glazed in everything you had to offer him, dripping with precum that helps guide the slick movements of his palm along his pretty shaft. you’re so pretty, covered in love bites and sweat and cum, lying there with big dizzy doe eyes — of course it’s going to rile him up. katsuki fucks his fist with an insatiable wanton, squeezing the base where you’ve left a foamy ring if your cream on him, to stave off his orgasm just so he can look at you a little longer.
“show me your pussy baby, wanna see how much i’ve ruined you.” he heaves through the fog of desire carried in the vibrato. it shakes when you peel your doughy thighs apart — stuck together by clear ropes of your gooey release
“i want you to cum for me, baby.”
bakugou presses his nose into your shin, a light blush dusting the bridge of it along with his cheeks. “i know, sweetness. ‘m gonna — fuck. g-gonna give it to you.” he stutters out, running a thumb through the seedy slit of his cockhead. you feel like you could cum again just from watching bakugou get off to the vision of you — his lips drag along your inner shin as well causing warm breath to coast along your salt-licked skin until you’re shivering through your aftershocks in anticipation. so you dip your fingers between your legs to spread your ravaged folds, circling your abused hole to give him a good look at the damage he’s done to you.
“please katsuki,” you gasp, teasing him just a little by playing with yourself to the same pace that bakugou jerks off with .
the blonde chokes back a pathetic sob, letting go of his achingly hot and heavy dick to let it thud against his tummy. he’s always been blessed, the sight of katsuki’s length is mouthwatering enough as it is — but seeing it bright red and shining under the yellow light, covered in a thin layer of white to show how turned on he is, is reward enough for you.
he’s so wet and heavy, oozing at every opportunity he gets — smearing a trail of precum along his manuka honey skin. “you drive me fuckin’ insane, my baby’s tryna kill me,” bakugou slurs over the drool collecting in his mouth, spitting down onto himself which only adds to the lewdness of the situation. “wheredya want it, hah?” dewy sounds of bakugou fucking his own, soiled palm mask his shaky breath, his hips ramming forward and never letting up on their urgent rhythm. “you want me to paint that pussy, white?” leaning forward, he taps his red-hot tip against your overstimulated sex — nearly busting.
“you like that? so fuckin’ naughty, maybe you wanna get all knocked up ‘n filled up by me,” he goads, pressing his cock head against your entrance before going back to jerking off — bat the way your whole body joints from the idea of ‘accidentally’ being bred.
“or do you want me to fuck that angel mouth of yours, get a taste of me?” he speeds up, chasing that innate desire to cum, throwing his head back while a needy groan escapes from the cage in his chest. “m-maybe i should cum on those pretty tits, maybe your face. show you how much i love you. how would you like that, baby?”
his sinful suggestions lull a weak moan out of you as you rut upward, letting katsuki push his slick cock through the remainders of your release still trapped between your folds. shaking hips, you hear the blonde hiss at your warmth around him while he pumps himself harder and faster, losing pieces of himself to you. leaking all over you.
“let me have it, katsuki. cum for me, wherever you want.” you command him wistfully, following through when his colourful curses turn to airy and dreamy moans — hot spurts of viscous seed shooting from his tip over your quivering mound and soft tummy, claiming your body as katsuki’s prize. you’re in love with the way his face twists, his crimson eyes wet enough to reflect their colour like a kaleidoscope, his pink lips bitten until cherry red and wet with his own tears and sweat, his soft blonde hair matted to the sweat that pearls against his forehead.
katsuki looks like an angel when he cums.
“fuckin’… holy shit, i fuckin’ love you so much.” bakugou cries as he cums, collapsing over you smaller-than-his frame as the aftershocks wrack through him. you push your fingers through his sweaty locks to bring him back down, soothing the static ringing in his ears as the rest of his orgasm smears against your inner thigh. “y’so pretty baby, jus’ go fuckin’ insane watchin’ you cum hard f’me like that.” he breathes, lashes fluttering against your neck.
kissing the side of his head, you hum in content. “i could say the same about you, lover boy.” pushing at his muscular shoulder, you giggle. “now let’s get cleaned up, unless you were serious about getting me knocked up.”
“s-shit,” laughing rasping, bakugou rolls off of you and nestles himself into your side. “don’t say shit like that. you already got me so fucked up.”
“you and i both know we could go again, hot shot.” you grin as bright as ever — tempting your boyfriend into another round. “best two out of three?”
“i fuckin’ love you,”
“i love you too.”
꒰ end. — all rights reserved © tteokdoroki 2023. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.
#bakugou x reader#bakugou smut#bakugou thirst#bakugo smut#bakugo x reader#bakugo x you#bakugo thirst#bakugou x you#bakugou drabble#bakugou imagine#bakugo drabble#bakugou katsuki smut#bnha smut#bnha x reader#mha smut#✧ ₊˚੭ — writing#tteokdoroki#✧ ₊˚✉️੭ — new notification#✧ ₊˚💬੭ — unknown messenger#angelshubnetwork
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like she used to
alexia putellas x sister
i have been writing this for ages and it has just sat in my documents folder since january. i don't usually post stuff i write so this will probably get taken down at some point. i've written 13k words so far but this is just the first 4k.
~~~~~~
I hadn't expected to get the call up, not at all really. But Mapi tore her meniscus and apparently the first team found themselves in need of a backup centre back and I was the best option from the B team. It's a compliment, really. Mami is very proud of me and she is excited for me and my sister to play together in a few weeks, even though she is still recovering from her surgery and I will probably not make it off the bench. I am only 15 and 10 months, usually they wait until you are at least 16 and a bit before you can play.
But, I don't really know how to feel. Thankfully Alexia won't be in training with me for now and I try to avoid thinking about what will happen when she eventually gets better and I have to face her again.
Alexia is my older sister by a lot. There's a 14 year age gap between us and I used to completely and utterly idolise her. She and Alba were two superheroes, always by my side when I needed them. I put them on a pedestal like they were the greatest human beings to ever walk the planet. To me back then, they were.
I was only four when my father died. All I remember from that time was the big black invisible sheet that hung outside his study and the dark and scary emotions that swallowed our house whole. Alba and Alexia would argue about who got to cuddle me at night and I was so unaware what was happening that I would happily agree, wiping away their tears when it all got too much.
The death of our father made our family unit stronger. Mami, Ale, Alba and Elena - it was all any of us needed and we supported each other in whatever ways we could.
Mami had to pick up more shifts at her job, so she couldn't pick me up from school. Alexia had just got her license so she would come in a break during training and pick me up in her training gear.
Alexia didn't have time to drop me off at home so I would sit and watch the training with whoever wanted to give me company when they were injured.
Most days, Alba would come and pick me up and take me on the bus all the way home. She would play cartoons on the TV as she sat at the table and did school work. Some days, when she had the time she would sit with me and watch Alexia's training and we'd all go home together. Alba used to say she enjoyed the training. Looking back, I think she just wanted a free ride home and an excuse to not do her homework.
As I grew up, everything just worked. Alexia and Alba were still living at home as a support to Mami and everything was perfect. My sisters were my idols, my Mami was my shining star. She still is. She would do anything for her daughters, as long as it meant we were all happy.
That is why it has been so hard for her over the past two years.
I have not been happy, not really. My football has been thriving, I have represented my country in the under 17 age group and I am a consistent starter in the Barcelona B team. I spent two years in La Masia before they sent me to the B team last year and I have only been improving since. Everything is going well. Mami says I have had a better start to my career than Alexia did.
Maybe that is why Alexia hates me. Maybe Mami is just saying that to make me feel better about it.
Alexia and I, despite the 14 year age gap, were always inseparable - for the first 12 years of my life. She was at every single school event, football game, she picked me up from trainings when she could and would train me herself in the garden. We shared a common passion that Alba was not interested in at all - we both love football, we eat, sleep and breath it. Football is everything. She was the one who gave me that mentality.
"Football is life, Lena, you are lucky you are so good because now you also get to live football and hermanita, it is the most incredible thing."
She had whispered that to me when I was 11. We were sat on the beach, a place we visited frequently throughout my childhood, both of us staring out at the reflection of the moon on the sea. Alba was fast asleep, her head in Alexia's lap as she snored lightly, completely oblivious to our conversation.
It all fell apart over three years ago, although I don't have the first clue as to why.
It was not an explicit event that ruined everything, more my older sister growing up and flying the nest that was so secure and established over years and years of shared success, happiness, failure and grief. She moved out of home long before that, but her split with Jenni upset her, I think, a great deal. I wouldn't know because she didn't really tell me anything - that was strictly Alba's business.
I didn't even know they had broken up until 5 months after it actually happened.
"Mami, why does Jenni never come over any more?"
It was an innocent and normal question, but the look on my mother's face told me everything. Everything about Jenni and everything about my sister.
I think that was the first knock. She hadn't done anything wrong but I had loved Jenni and Jenni had loved me. I would have thought that she would have told me they broke up. Maybe she didn't want to, maybe she just forgot. She does a lot of that these days.
Before she and Jenni broke up, she still came to all of my games. She never missed one game before I transferred to La Masia and would insist on taking me out to ice cream after every one. She would tease me for not scoring like she does, even though I play as a centre back.
"You need some training from Mapi, she is a centre back and has the most lethal free kick, hermanita! She is the best defender I have played with, but don't tell her I said that. I think you will grow up to be better than her."
She was excited that day, I had made a few good saves and I think that was the first time she really saw that I had the potential to be great.
I remember the first game she was late to. I noticed immediately but we both pretended she was on time - she only made it to the last 10 minutes but I put it down as traffic or being caught up at training. She was busy, it takes a lot to be La Reina.
I remember the first game she missed entirely. She wasn't there at the beginning and she wasn't there at the end. I was 13 and I didn't have a phone yet so I couldn't call Mami and ask her to come pick me up because Alexia was too busy. I told myself it was because she was too busy. I didn't want to say she had forgotten because that was too hard for me to handle.
I remember vividly sitting outside the stadium as the sun set. My coach had asked where my sister was, I was a bit stuck with what to say but I managed to convince her I was fine and she could go home.
Alba came and picked me up after work that night. It was dark and she looked sad but when I asked if she was ok, she just shrugged her shoulders and said everything would be fine.
I found out from Mami a few weeks later that Alba was sad because I had never once been forgotten anywhere. Alba saw that as the destruction of our strong family. I suppose she was not wrong.
Alexia never said anything about that game but she was at the next. She didn't take me out for ice cream after, instead patting my head and telling me she would drop me off at Mami's work.
"I have things to do, Elena, I am very busy. Hopefully soon Mami will let you catch the bus on your own. Maybe Alba can take you soon so you know the correct routes."
Her words hurt more than I could admit to myself, I told myself to stop being pathetic. Mami asked why I was crying when I walked into her office. I told her I had played terribly and she comforted me. I think she knew I was lying. I think that is why she had tears in her eyes when she released me from her grip-like hold.
Since that day, Alexia has been to 3 of my games. She went to one more of my old club games but she was sat beside Alba, her eyes glued to her phone the entire match. I was so unfocused that the ball deflected off my face and we conceded. I was taken off with a bleeding nose but when I looked up in the stands, my sister was still staring at her phone. Alba had run down the stairs and was by my side when I entered the little sick bay.
I cried then too. Most people thought it was because of the bleeding nose or the conceded goal. Alba knew that wasn't the real reason.
The penultimate game she watched was the final of the under 15s Catalonia cup. I don't know what she did during the game because Mami told me not to look up. She said she didn't want me to get distracted but I think she meant to say she didn't want me to get hurt.
I think I still idolised Alexia at that point in time. She was still my older sister and she was still the best player in the world. She still had weekly dinners at home, although she wouldn't sit next to me and sneakily take all the food I didn't want off my plate anymore. She stopped staying to watch a movie after dinner even though my favourite part of the week was falling asleep in her lap as her hands combed softly through my hair.
I remember when I was accepted into La Masia, Mami held a nice big dinner. It was right in the middle of covid so it was technically illegal, but we had a lot of my family over. Mami invited a few of the Barcelona girls as well and Mapi and Leila reminded me of what it used to be like before Alexia stopped loving me.
The reminder of the before was more painful than I liked to admit, and the night ended when the tears that had been burning in the back of my eyes finally spilled out as I was talking to Mapi.
She immediately pulled me into her arms and asked what was wrong and I struggled to find a lie that would be believable.
I settled on saying I was upset about everything changing - which I suppose was true.
I remember Alexia looking mortified and breaking eye contact as soon as I looked at her. She told me off that evening when Mami was in the shower and Alba was talking to someone else. She told me I needed to be grateful for everything I have been given and that she paved the way for me.
It was even worse when she said I would never achieve the things she has. She said it was because I didn't have the mentality that she did, that I had it all so easy.
It hurt the most when she told me she was disappointed in the person I was.
"I hope we never share a shirt, Elena, because the day you play in the first Barcelona team is the day that we have run out of players. It will mean that football players are week and female footballers can not be weak. You do not have it in you to be like me, to do what I have done to get to where I am."
The venom in her voice sent a cold shiver down my spine and I felt like I had been stabbed. I didn't cry that time. I waited until I was in my bedroom to sob my heart out.
The last time she ever watched me play was the next day, but she didn't have an option not to. I played terribly, my first game as a La Masia student, my sisters words repeating over and over in my head.
That was really what tipped the relationship I once shared with Alexia on its head. The pedestal I had put her on was destroyed and suddenly she was just another player. I barely saw her as my sister any more. She couldn't love me, you wouldn't be able to hurt someone you love so much.
I have barely seen her since. She still comes to our family dinners on Thursday nights - she still very much loves Alba and our Mami. But I tell Mami that I have training with Barcelona B late on Thursdays. It finishes at 6 and dinner starts at 7, but I just organise to go to my friends' houses for dinner instead.
Sometimes we both have dinner together at home, but it is awkward and I hate it. I think she has probably forgotten about what she said to me in June of 2021, but I don't think I will ever be able to.
She doesn't like me, but it's ok because I have learnt to accept that. But I will never not love my sister because she was once everything to me.
~~~~~~
"Pequena Putellas!" Patri's excited shriek is what welcomes me into the dressing room on my first day. She tackles me into a hug and squeezes me tight. "It has been such a long time, mi favorita!"
The last time I saw Patri was only last year at the champions league final. I had sat with my whole family but I went to the bathroom when everyone else went and spoke to the players. I don't think Patri would have seen me.
I can only smile as she continues.
"I remember you as the little 8 year old who would sit and watch our training sessions after school! I was so confused by you when I first arrived here, you know. I remember the first time Ale let you play a game with us and you were so good!"
"Nobody doubted that you would be on this team one day!" A new voice entered the conversation.
"Marta!" I hugged the brunette closely. She was always one of my favourites.
"I am proud of you, pequena putellas."
Her words are familiar as I have heard them out of my mothers voice time and time again my whole life. But they seem foreign coming from Marta and it is an unwanted reminder of my sister. I don't know why - maybe it is because I have always associated this Barcelona team with her. I don't remember the last time she said she was proud of me.
I don't remember the last time she said anything to me, really.
"Gracias, Marta, I have missed you." I bury my head into her neck and she holds me closer.
"You have not been around as much since you transferred to La Masia. I wanted to come and watch but Ale never extended an invitation and I didn't want to overstep." I shake my heads at her words and she frowns.
"Alexia doesn't have time for my games, she hasn't for a while. It takes a lot to be La Reina."
Marta's frown deepens at my words and the attention of a few spanish players is captured. I should have spoken quieter, I forgot how many people in here speak catalan.
"It is ok, she is very supportive, but she just can't come to my games. She makes it up in other ways." I am lying through my teeth but Marta will never know.
"I am sure, she must be very proud of you, being selected in this team for the first time, it is a big deal, you are very young."
All I can do is nod, my energy is all being put into holding back my own tears. I don't know if Mami told her. I don't know if Alexia even knows that I was selected.
"Get changed now, I am sure Jona will want to talk to you before the session, especially with the game tomorrow."
I nod again as Marta pats me on the back and walk over to the cubby that says my name. It feels a bit surreal, really.
I never really thought I would see my name on a Barcelona cubby, accompanied by my new number that I chose in the meeting a few days ago. It was always a dream, but I never thought it was achievable. Alexia always seemed like a superstar, a superhuman of sorts and I would never reach that kind of level.
But here I am in the team that I always wanted to be in - in no way am I anywhere near my sisters level but I am on my way to being like her. I just wish she cared. I wish she was proud of me like Marta is.
Her cubby sits across from me and I try to tear my eyes from it but it sits and stares right back at me. I feel like an intruder in Alexia's space, this is not for me, she would not want me to be here.
I tie my laces quickly after that and head out onto the pitches to begin training.
I have trained with the first team twice before, but the Barcelona Bs were always slightly seperate and we could keep our distance from the first players. Jonatan is a familiar face and I feel comfortable as he smiles and me and motions for me to follow the others to the gym.
It is weird, being promoted within my own club. I am not so much a new signing, but a replacement - I am not good enough to be in the first team but they had no other options when Mapi injured herself.
I used to worry that people would say I only get opportunities because my last name is Putellas. When my sister told me I was weak all those years ago, that idea sort of cemented in my head, I suppose.
I never told my Mami what her daughter said to me because it would upset her. I told Alba half of it when she found me crying in my room a few days later but made her promise to not tell anyone. She couldn't say anything to Mami, Alexia, anyone at all because it would only make Alexia think I was weaker.
She was furious and tried to tell me it was untrue but it had already been said. I believed Alexia's word more than anyone else. To me, she was a superhuman.
But when I spoke to Jonatan a few days ago he made me feel like I was wanted within this squad. He made it clear that he wants me to integrate completely into the squad in the next few years and that he can see me playing soon even though I am only 15.
I told him I didn't want anything special because of my surname.
He told me that he chose me because of my first name.
"Elena Putellas," he said with a grin, "you may be as good as her, but you are not your sister. This is a professional environment. As long as you perform, which I know you will, nobody will care what your name is."
It was a big boost to my confidence.
Aitana Bonmati caught up to me quickly as I walked to the gym.
"You are big now." I chuckled but did not look over, I didn't need to really. "But not that big. You are only 15, si?"
"Yes, I am 15."
I met Aitana when she first joined the club. She always used to say that she would steal me and take me home with her because she thought I was adorable. It is strange that I am now sort of in the same team as her.
She started playing for the first team when I was 8. I was older then, I played my own football and liked staying with Alexia so I could kick a ball around with her teammates when they were done.
Aitana was one of the few who would stay every time I was there. When Alexia didn't want to wait she would drive me home herself, all the way to the other side of Barcelona. We would always stop for ice cream on the way home.
"I have not seen you in too long, Lena. I have missed you a lot but you have been doing very well in the B team. I am very proud and I take credit for your abilities." She spoke in such a dead pan voice but it was somehow still filled with emotion.
"I have missed you too, ABC." It was a nickname I gave her the first time she drove me home. I had been learning about the alphabet in English class and had the little song stuck in my head when she told me her full name. I used to sing her initials in the tune of the song but it quickly merged to me just saying the three letters.
"I have been to a few of your games, you know?"
I look at her in confusion, I have never seen her there. She just nods.
"Alexia never invited any of us but she was never at the ones I went to so I would sit in the stands with a hat and glasses so people wouldn't recognise me, but I was there. I went to your La Masia games as well. You have become a phenomenal player, Lena."
She has always spoken with such sincerity. I have missed her a lot.
"Maybe you can drop me off at home again tonight? I have missed you."
She chuckles and pulls me into a side hug.
"I was waiting for you to ask, little Lena. Oh you are not so little any more!"
I chuckle as well and let my head fall onto her shoulder as we enter the gym. My eyes scan the room, looking at all of the players on their equipment, nerves quickly settling inside me.
"Don't worry, it's all easy." Aitana seems to read my mind. "Just come with me and I will show you how to do everything. It will become second nature in the next few days."
The gym session went quickly as I was taught all the different exercises. I was familiar with most of them, having done a very similar program in the past with the B team.
We went out onto the field to do some drills and I played well. Jonatan was impressed and so were the first players. My teammates? Maybe, not quite, I don't think. I still haven't been in a team list, so I suppose I'll be their teammate when that eventually happens.
It wasn't until we reached the ice cream shop that Aitana started asking me all the awkward questions. I should have seen it coming.
"Why do you never come to our games anymore, Lena?" I was very grateful for the scoops of gelato in my hands. Eating it delayed my response as I tried to come up with something to say. I shrug as I eat.
I can not say it is because I do not get along with Alexia. It is too hard for me to say now, even after all these years.
"I'm not sure. I suppose I got busy with my own training and school. I have been to a few but I usually go home with Alba pretty quickly after they finish." It is only half a lie but she just shrugs, apparently not believing my words.
"And why is it that I am driving you home from your first ever first team training? I thought Alexia would have wanted to." I anticipated a question like this but that does not mean I wanted her to actually ask it.
"Alexia is busy." I hope that Aitana understands I don't want to talk about it. I haven't spoken about my broken relationship with my sister to anyone. I think she can sense something is wrong though, because she puts her spoon back into her ice cream and grabs my arm so I am staring right at her.
"If you ever want to talk, I am right here, Lena. I know you don't like people knowing what is going on inside that crazy head of yours but it is good to release your feelings."
She definitely knows something is wrong so I appreciate her not pushing.
"I have outlets, I play football, I play the piano, I am ok, aitana, I really am."
She eyed me as if to say she didn't believe me but dropped the topic anyway.
"When did you get so good?"
chapter II
#woso fanfics#woso#woso imagine#alexia putellas#putellas!reader#alexia putellas x reader#barca femeni#fcb femeni#alexia putellas imagine
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You think you know someone. [Fred Weasley x Reader]
Title: You think you know someone.
Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader
Timeline: OOTP- canon and timelines altered for purposes of the story. Some bits have been exaggerated for artistic purposes. Based more on the films than the books. Reader joins DA but what if instead of Cho ratting them out, it’s you?
Summary: You had everything during your time at Hogwarts- good friends, Fred Weasley as your boyfriend and a promising future, until Dolores Umbridge turns up.
Warnings: This one turned out a little dark. Mentions of injury, torture, bullying, wounds, blood. Umbridge is a bitch. Snape is a bully. Use of unforgivable curses. Punishment. Kissing, pranks, swearing. Dumbledore’s Army and resistant forces. Brief mentions of Voldemort and probable war. Pet names: baby, sweetheart, princess. Not beta read. Happy ending I promise.
Word count: 9.3k (I feel like I’ve written a novel here)
This work is gifted to @kellyxo1 thanks to the wonderful request that I couldn’t turn down! I’m sorry it’s taken me a while to get this out but it’s been a complete labour of love and I hope you like it!💕
You knew Dolores Umbridge was trouble the moment you spotted her in the Great Hall, her gaudy pink outfit and matching pink cheeks made her stick out like a sore thumb amongst the classic, muted colour pallet you knew to be Hogwarts. Her smile unnerved you, the cold expression in her eyes never once matching the infallible twisted, sadistic smile that so often painted her face. Everything about her rang alarm bells in your mind.
Fred and George had been sitting either side of you at the banquet table in the Great Hall as she took centre stage and delivered her speech about being very good friends, as ominous and foreboding as it seemed.
"That's likely," the twins had mumbled, resting their heads on their hands, elbows on the table as a small act of rebellion against the airs and graces she clearly put on. You'd subconsciously scooted closer to Fred when she stood, reaching for his spare hand under the table that he'd offered you, sensing a little of your discomfort. Fred was always acutely aware of your emotions, able to read you like a book, you supposed it was a natural consequence of being together for so long.
You'd met on the first day of Hogwarts when you'd stepped into the train compartment he shared with George, locked eyes and the rest was history. You'd been dating since your second year, both of you unable to deny the childlike crushes and stolen glances of your attraction and as you grew up, you grew together. Now you were in your last year, with big plans ahead of Fred and George's business which you'd planned to help them with initially and bigger promises of moving in together in the flat above the shop. The natural progression of a happy relationship and an exciting prospect that kept you motivated to finish school on a high.
The atmosphere at Hogwarts was different this year: understandably tense and foreboding, not just because of Cedric's death and the rumoured return of Voldemort but of the disquiet around Harry's claims and the propagandistic reporting from the Daily Prophet refuting Harry's claims. It seemed everyone was divided into wether they believed Harry or if they believed what they were reading in the media. It was evident that the ministry had worked hard to deny and deflect Harry'a claims, disparaging and slandering him publicly. Of course the arrival of a certain Pink adorned dementor didn't help things, especially when she, as new defense against the dark arts teacher, did away with the old curriculum and removed any defensive, practical teaching in favour of simple theory- which would be of no use in real life situations, of which you were all undoubtedly facing. Then the educational decrees began where she was appointed Hogwarts' high inquisitor and sought to change anything she was as unsatisfactory, backed by the ministry, which seemed to propel the whole school further and further away from what it should be teaching and how it should be preparing it's students for what was inevitably happening.
"She can't do this! It's ridiculous, George is fuming, never mind Fred," you overheard Ginny say as you were about to take a seat for dinner but quickly stopped as you gave her a questioning look, not knowing what she meant, her eyes focusing in on your frozen form.
"What?"
"You haven't seen the new decree?" She asks curiously, placing down her fork onto the plate. You shook your head briefly before walking quickly out of the hall, dinner be damned to examine the wall of decrees, trying to fix your eyes onto the new plaque on the wall.
Educational Decree No. 30: All Weasley products will be banned immediately.
You rushed upstairs to the common room, split in two minds about wether they would be there or on the quidditch pitch, trying to expel their frustrations... until you remembered that broom flying had been outlawed unless part of a lesson or during Quidditch games, as few and far between as they were coming due to the constant cancelling.
When you found them in their dorm, George was pacing the room, kicking the wooden frame of his bed after every circuit whilst Fred sat perched on his own bed, face downcast and eyes filled with anger.
You knew it wouldn't stop them, nothing ever did, but the business they forged from nothing had suffered for a while as students were afraid of the repercussions of being searched and found with their products.
"Can't sell my products, can't fly a broom, can't even kiss my own girlfriend unless I find a way to snog her from six inches away!" Fred had been furious and rightly so but there seemed to be no hope in sight.
It seemed no one was unaffected by the drastic measures Umbridge was taking and you were all facing the consequences of the increasing restrictions, in multiple ways. You'd been given detention for the stupidest things, including casting a spell to undo the jinx Malfoy had placed on Neville one afternoon, another leg lock jinx that you'd fixed for him, received another for the muggle book in your possessions and another for deigning to be within six inches of George. The punishment was cruel and twisted but you'd hidden it from Fred, knowing how protective he was and how he'd act out to retaliate against her which would only land him in worse trouble. She seemed to focus on you in particular, for whatever reason you weren't sure but she hardly hid her distaste for you publicly. Fred said it was because of your connection to him and George but you weren't sure, it seemed more personal than that.
It had been Hermione's brilliant idea to forge a sort of rebellion in order to actually learn the practical side of defence and you'd been eager to sign up after attending the first meeting at the Hog's Head in Hogsmeade, knowing that you had to arm yourself in whatever way you could, the feeling of unease at the current climate always looming overhead. You'd been pleasantly surprised by the turn out, seeing many familiar faces as you'd walked hand in hand with Fred into the small, freezing cold room as you waited for Harry, Ron and Hermione. Cho, Luna, Neville, Ginny, Michael and so many others from Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff had turned out to fight for the cause and as you looked around the room of friends and familiars, it was evident that this could work.
You'd signed the parchment Hermione had brought with no hesitation, lining up between Fred and Ginny, clearly marking your name under his in the pencil provided. As you walked back to the castle in a group, Fred's arm around you and his hat in your head to keep the cold away from your ears, you felt determined and inspired to make this work. You'd just need to find somewhere to practice away from the prying eyes of the inquisitor.
Then came Educational Decree No.68: All student organisations are henceforth be disbanded. Any student in noncompliance will be expelled.
This time, you weren't angered or afraid of the newly instated restriction but instead felt empowered to rebel. Neville, in a feat of brilliance, had discovered the room of requirement one Saturday afternoon as he made his way down the seventh floor corridor. It was perfect, exactly what was needed, and you'd all wasted no time in putting the room to good use.
Within just two weeks, you'd mastered disarming spells, stunning spells, hexes, jinxes and defensive charms that you'd never thought you could do. Ginny had proven herself to be incredibly skilled and you'd stood watching in amazement as two magpies flying around the room, both coming from your boyfriend and his twin. The twins had taken to placing bets, mostly against Ron, all of you in good spirits about finally being able to do magic again. You and Fred took full advantage of being shielded away from the eyes of Hogwarts and had taken to lingering in the room after the sessions so you could be close to each other, to kiss freely and be intimate again. It had seemed so long, so cruel to have to keep away from him, at least in public and as you watched him master spells so effortlessly and looking so deliciously hot as he did it, often with messy hair and rolled up sleeves, it was exactly what you needed to relieve yourself of the building frustrations.
Fun and laughter had once again returned to Hogwarts, though shielded from the regulating eyes, it was just like before. The twins had even taken to pranking again, no longer concerned by the changes, including giving Filch laced chocolates which made him erupt with giant, puss-filled boils on his face when he got too close to the scent of your secret gatherings.
Educational decree No. 82: All students will submit to questioning about suspected illicit activities.
Umbridge had began to gather students for an inquisitorial squad which would earn them credit for joining, most notably the Slytherin students that weaselled their way into Umbridge's good books. Most probably by being pure bloods. They took great pleasure in pulling up the younger students in particular for punishment or questioning and abused their powers frequently.
Then you returned to school after winter break and the news of the Azkaban breakout happened, constant storms were forecasted, Umbridge's cruel regime heightened. Everything felt so restrictive, so unnecessary, so twisted. The only place you found solace was during DA meetings when you could be yourself, free to act and perform as you wanted surrounded by your friends and boyfriend. Always alert at the imposing threat, knowing Filch was on to you all and the rest of the inquisitorial squad which only fuelled you to keep discreet.
It had been a regular day of classes until your DADA lesson where you'd been required by the toad to write an essay on the benefits of conversational reasoning as opposed to practical magic to handle disputes with half breeds and lower class species, such as centaurs. You'd almost immediately refused to write such things, particularly due to the disgusting terms used to class different species but also due to the ridiculous concept.
"I am teaching you verified way of effective communication, in which you do not have to use your wand," she defends with a sickeningly fake smirk.
"Or our brains by taking away our autonomy," you'd argued, not even under your breath.
"Are you questioning my methods of teaching miss y/l/n? By all means if you think you can do better I should like to see you try."
"Can't be hard, Professor Quirrel did a better job and he shared a head and a singular brain cell with Voldemort."
A murmur of concealed laughter burst from the students around you and for a singular moment you felt the victory of it, empowered even.
"Detention!" She's utterly outraged, her face turning a dangerous shade of fuchsia. You could feel the eyes on you, most notably your boyfriend and his twin from across the room but you didn't care. Since returning to school you'd been torn away from Fred, unable to be anywhere near each other and certainly not in a group with your friends as it would break at least three decrees. You were frustrated and had hit breaking point, anger simmering in you but why you didn't know. You'd completely had enough.
"It's a date Dolores," you said sarcastically with the sickliest smile you could muster. More snickers erupted around you and even a clap that sounded suspiciously like it came from the direction of your future brother in law.
"My office, now!" She screams, pointing with her pink tipped finger towards the door. You grabbed your stuff from the desk and walked out without a single look in anyone's direction. On your way to her office, you pulled the special coin from your pocket and checked over the date and time to check you had it right. There was a DA meeting later that evening and you'd hoped this would be over quickly so that you could still attend.
Only, that never happened. Instead you'd been tortured for hours in the cruelest of ways, repeatedly questioned over your involvement with the alleged group and had been forced to drink truth serum until the words had slipped out of your mouth. You'd had no control over it, no way of resisting any longer and with great shame, you'd told her about the room of requirement, completely unable to stop the words from coming out.
The inquisitorial squad was on you in mere moments, as soon as Umbridge had signalled them from outside the door and Malfoy's grubby hands were pulling your weak and exhausted body from the chair before you could even register the intrusion. The things you'd been through, the pain and the anguish, it was nothing compared to the fear you felt at the DA being discovered; you could only pray that you'd held out long enough so that the meeting was over.
"Where is it?!" Umbridge screamed into your face when you wouldn't disclose the exact location of the room of requirement, having already inadvertently let slip that the room was your meeting place. You gave her your darkest look, no longer feeling controlled by whatever she had obviously put in your tea. When she didn't get an answer, her hand struck you hard right across the cheek but you hardly flinched, hardly feeling the pain anymore.
"I know the way Ma'am," Filch said, his saggy face appearing around the corner creepily, his features twisting into a vulgar, perverse smile. You could hardly look at Umbridge's face as it twisted into a pleased, twisted grin as she fixed her jacket and allowed Filch to lead her. Malfoy grabbed hold of your robes tighter in his fist and you were dragged along with them until you reached the seventh floor.
You felt sick to your stomach, wanting to scream and cry, resist in anyway you could as you fought against Malfoy's hold but you were physically tired and weak. Crabbe had grabbed hold of the other side of you, your thrashing too much for Malfoy to hold down by himself and his hands were much tougher against your skin, no doubt leaving bruises in their wake. When the door to the room of requirement didn't appear, you felt hopeful that she'd realise you were lying, even if that meant horrendous consequences for you. There was no way of warning them, nothing you could do to allow them to flee, you'd have to watch as they were all caught redhanded. They'd think you ratted them out, your friends, the love of your life. You knew it was exactly what Umbridge wanted, to turn everyone against you- and she was undoubtedly going to get it.
"Bombarda Maxima," her eerily calm and squeaky voice rang out as she pointed her want at the wall. Your scream mixed in with the large bang as a giant hole was created in the wall, depris and dust flying everywhere.
When the dust cloud cleared, you were dragged off from the side viciously by Malfoy and Crabbe until you were presented in front of the Army- your friends. You didn't want to look up from your spot on the floor, still fighting against their holds on you but something made you look up. And then you met his eyes.
Fred had never looked at you that way, ever. The looks of love and adoration you'd become accustomed to over the years, the playfulness and the intimate looks, it was all gone. The look in his eyes would haunt you forever, the coldness, betrayal and the resentment and it was explicitly clear what his expression told you.
He believed that you ratted them out, believed that you could ever do that to him, to them all.
You had to look away, desperate to see any hope that someone believed you, that someone sympathised with the torment you'd endured but as your eyes travelled across to George, you stopped short. He looked furious with you, disgusted and despite everything you'd been through in the past few hours, you'd receive no sympathy or chance to explain yourself to the people you loved.
You were dragged away as Umbridge dealt with the Army, bestowing threats and punishments upon them that you couldn't hear. You no longer fought against the holds of the Slytherins but instead went willingly, feeling guilty, shame and simply dirty for your role in all of this, even if it wasn't your fault.
Members of the ministry arrived not too long after, having been alerted prior to the discovery of the DA. You couldn't look at Kingsley, much too distraught to see his look of disgust at you, no doubt planning to tell the Order what you'd done. Harry was ushered in not long after having been caught in the skirmish. His newfound hatred of you seemed to radiate off him as he stood beside you and this alone made you want to scream and cry out of frustration, tears welling in your eyes that you wouldn't allow to spill.
The final straw was when Percy walked in, without so much as a glimmer of recognition towards you and took over from Malfoy to restrain you and Harry, keeping the shoulder of your robe balled up in his hand. The minister ordered him to dispatch an owl to the Daily Prophet and he diligently nodded, trying to manoeuvre you along with him.
"Get off me Weatherby," you demanded viciously, fighting against his hold and managing to break free, only to be stopped as you all looked on in amazement as Dumbledore disappeared out of sight in a magnificent display.
You'd hoped after that, you'd be able to get Harry alone, to explain yourself to him, to tell him what had happened but he'd completely avoided you, blanked you entirely. You hardly blamed him but you needed to explain, to clear your name. Umbridge then commanded Harry to join her in the hall where the punishment was being conducted, all of the DA together.
You'd been permitted to return to your dorm after the meeting had finished but you stood outside of the hall doors, desperate to see Fred and explain yourself, hoping he could bring you at least an ounce of comfort. Your head was pounding from the pain earlier and the marks on your arms were throbbing, sore and weeping though you fought not to look at them, knowing the pain would only be worse when you saw what was tormenting you. You couldn't go to Madame pomfrey, Umbridge had made that very clear and so you suffered in complete silence until you could reach out for your friends.
You lingered outside of the door for what felt like hours, the anxiety and the nerves you felt seemingly freezing time. When the doors opened, the members of the DA began pouring out with soured looks on their faces which only heightened when they caught sight of you. It was never hard to spot Fred and George amongst a crowd, their towering height easily distinguishable amongst a sea of people.
The look on everyone's face was near identical, the disgust and the resentment evident in their eyes as they spotted you but none clearer than the twins. George looked like he detested you, his face scrunched into a look of utter distaste, eyes glaring into you as he walked past without a care. Fred looked away, ignoring your presence completely as he glided past you without muttering a single word, his face stone cold and void of expression.
"Freddie, please," you said weakly and emotionally, with tears in your eyes, turning around in the spot as he walked past you. But nothing, he didn't turn, didn't react, simply walked away without so much as a single glance.
"Harry," you implored, taking a step towards him but he too blanked you again, pushing past you and walking quickly up the steps to avoid you.
You stood alone in the cold and empty corridor, feeling more isolated and alone than you ever had and finally allowed yourself to cry. Silent tears fell down your cheeks, shoulders sagging as you cried for everything you had undoubtedly lost, for the treatment you'd received and for the pain you still felt in your head and arms. Finding a spot in a hidden corner, you finally allowed yourself to pull up the sleeve of your robe and look upon the damage that Umbridge had inflicted with her sadistic quill. It was horrendous, an onslaught of slurs and vicious words etched into your body, no doubt intentionally done to leave the scars as a permanent reminder.
You sobbed your heart out in that little nook between two cold, stone pillars as you tried desperately to heal the marks but no spell was strong enough even to numb it in your weakened state.
You eventually made your way to Gryffindor tower, stepping through the portrait and finding the common room practically deserted. You sighed and walked up the stone steps to your dorm, only to find that the door had been shut and your blanket and pillow had been thrown outside of it, a clear sign you were not welcome even within your own dorm. You were painfully exhausted and wanted nothing more than to curl up in your bed and cry into your pillow until you eventually passed out. But you didn't even deserve that.
With a heavy sigh, you collected your blanket and pillow and trudged down the steps back towards the common room, eyes blurry through a mixture of tiredness and tears. You stopped short the second you crossed the last step, seeing Fred and George step in through the portrait hole, your stomach flipping nervously as you anticipated a barrage of insults or horrible pranks, their allegiance turning from you now.
"Fred, Freddie please," you begged, dropping your makeshift bedding to walk towards him, trying to reach out for him. You paused as you saw the redness on the back of his left hand, a clearly fresh punishment, 'I must not break rules'. George intercepts immediately and barges past you, blocking you from getting to Fred as he turns his twin away from you.
"You think you know someone," George mutters as he gently nudges Fred up the stairs, sending you a vicious glare before he walks up after him, once again leaving you alone. Fred didn't even spare a single glance at you, not even to recoil away.
You curled up in a corner armchair as soon as the tears appeared, pathetically dragging the blanket over you and cried until you fell asleep in the uncomfortable chair.
The two weeks that followed were the absolute worst weeks of your life. Umbridge had stripped you of everything you loved in one fell swoop, turned everyone against you and left the place you called home feeling miserable and lonely. You deserved it, you knew that, having ratted them out. You'd antagonised her and now had to live through then consequences, as cruel and twisted as they were.
The glares from everyone you had once called friends hadn't stopped, especially from George, which hurt the most. Fred had outright ignored any effort you'd made to reach out to him, no matter how desperate you'd sounded or how hard you'd tried to make him understand. He didn't care. He believed the lie.
The first week you'd tried to take your meals with the rest of the Gryffindors but it was made abundantly clear to you that you were not permitted nor welcome to join your friends and had been cruelly banished to the end of the table, beside the first years. The second week you'd stopped attending meals at all, not able to push through the shame and embarrassment of being cast away, exiled from your group. Lessons were monotonous and any down time was utterly excruciating as you were left enclosed with the other Gryffindors, namely your ex boyfriend, though no one would make any contact with you. You'd tried to sleep in your dorm but the girls had done nearly everything to prevent you from actually sleeping, talking loudly, setting off whizzbangs inside your curtains and had even transfigured your blanket a few times to varying degrees of horrid things. At the end of the night when you were certain everyone was asleep, usually very late, you'd creep down to the common room and huddle into your uncomfortable chair to sleep, only to be woken mere hours later when the first of the easy risers woke up. Your life was hell.
"There's just something I don't understand," Hermione says as they all stand on the bridge, the golden trio, Ginny and the Twins, all wrapped up in warm clothes and sweaters as they discuss the changes put into place since Umbridge had taken over as Headmistress. Naturally, the conversation had diverted to you, something Fred was entirely displeased about. The group turn to Hermione after her words, intrigued by the change in tone. She took a deep breath, closing her eyes before opening them again, as if building the strength to say her next sentence.
"I jinxed the enrolment parchment, for Dumbledore's Army," she admits, not quite meeting the gaze of the group around her. "It was purely a preventative measure, incase we were betrayed by one of our own. The person who disclosed any secrets would be jinxed to break out in spots, to spell out 'sneak' across their forehead, so we knew who the betrayer was. Y/N didn't have that, she never even had a single spot."
"Blimey Hermione," Ron says a little breathlessly, disbelieving she'd have actually gone that far.
"I know," she says a little defensively, "I just can't work out how she got around it!"
"Maybe she wrote her name wrong? Did she know about the jinx?" Harry suggests but Hermione shook her head, at the very same time that Ginny replied.
"I was behind her, I saw her write her name. It was right."
"Maybe the jinx didn't work?" Harry suggests carefully but stops himself when he receives a forceful glare from Hermione at the very notion of her failure.
"What does it matter? She dobbed us in wether or not she's covered in spots!" Ron says rather harshly, leaning against the wooden bannister.
Fred can't listen anymore, completely overwhelmed by the conversation and the thought of you betraying them. He turns and walks off back towards the castle without so much as a word to the others, not even his twin, and ignores their calls of his name as they watch him fade into the distance.
Spotting you sitting alone in the corner of the room when he returns to the common room, he frowns to himself. He'd known you since the moment you stepped on the Hogwarts express and had loved you for nearly just as long. It was wrong to see you sat alone, so sad and without the usual spark you naturally emitted. Everyone had always been drawn to you, your humour and wit, your dazzling smile, the fact you made everyone aroun you feel comfortable and valued. Too many boys had been drawn to you for his liking but you'd never even given them the time of day, never once wavering in your loyalty to him or ever made him doubt that it was him you wanted. You'd spent years supporting him, helping him and George develop their products, cheering for him loudly at every Quidditch game and had wormed your way into the hearts of every single one of his family members. Secretly, it crushed him to see you so lonely and tired, even if he still felt the sting of your betrayal.
It didn't add up, though he wouldn't disclose this to any of the more angered members of the group, why you would do such a thing. You'd been excited to start the DA, had joined in enthusiastically, kept the secret for so long and most of all you completely despised Umbridge. He couldn't deny that he still loved you, even though he was conflicted with his feelings now, he still held out hope that this would all go away, that there was a reasonable explanation but his anger wouldn't allow him to listen. It killed him to push you away, wanting nothing more than for things to return to normal but he felt a deep sense of betrayal that he couldn't shift.
"Fred?" He heard from behind him, pulling him out of his musings making him realise that he'd been staring at you all this time as he turned towards the person addressing him. Her name was Emery Atkinson, a Gryffindor from the year below that he'd never really acknowledged or spent much time with.
"Yeah?" He replies politely though he couldn't escape the edge of irritation after being pulled away from his thoughts. He watches as the girl giggles as soon as he acknowledges her and tucks a strand of blonde hair behind her ear.
"Oh good I got the right twin!" She giggles, ignorant to the blank look she received from Fred. "I was wondering if you had some canary creams I could buy? My brother loves them and it's his birthday soon. Your inventions are so clever, I don't know how you and George find the time between your studies and Quidditch, it must be exhausting. You're so good as Quidditch, I always cheer you on. Plus your girlfriend, but I heard that you weren't together anymore right?"
Truthfully, Fred had only registered the first half of her speech, tuning out after Canary Creams but his attention had been drawn back at the mention of you. He can't help but feel that little stab of sadness at the mention of you, especially someone referring to you as his girlfriend, or Ex rather. In the back of his mind he wonders if you heard that, from your short distance away, he hoped not.
"I still can't believe it, why would she do that? If I was with you I wouldn't even dream of ruining it." She sounds faux-scandalised and quite frankly, rather bitchy as he reaches out to touch the sleeve of his sweater. Fred doesn't humour her and instead takes half a step back subtly, reaching to scratch the back of his head as a discreet way of getting her off.
"Er, yeah I think we have some creams leftover, I'll send George over with some later, alright?"
"Not you?" She says with a sad little face, trying out her best puppy dog eyes that have absolutely no affect on him.
"George deals with the confectionery," he says a little too quickly; which is a complete lie. "Sorry, I've got somewhere to be but I'll let him know you're interested in buying."
He breaks away, giving her a forced but polite smile and a brief, parting wave but it's awkward and he's inwardly cringing as soon as he puts his hand down. Turning to where you had been sat in the chair, he notices you've disappeared and he is instantly overcome with a wave of guilt. You'd heard it all.
—
The next few days passed in blur for Fred, his mind wandering between what he was doing and thoughts of you, like he couldn't concentrate for more than a minute. He felt so conflicted within himself, made worse by the time spent apart from you, the longing beginning to set in. He'd never really been apart from you for very long, at most only a few weeks during the summer holidays and even then you'd have sent numerous letters by now, keeping in contact as much as you could until you were back beside each other. Now it was just torture, having you so close but so far away and the knowledge that he was the one that had pushed you away only furthered his guilt and internal conflict.
Fred was in a terrible mood, battling his thoughts, surviving on very little sleep and now the threat of her sadistic punishment was the icing on the cake of a really crap day when he and George had been forced to Umbridge's office. Harry had been caught trying to use the floo, to alert the order or escape and had been caught red handed by Umbridge. Each member of the DA had been frogmarched into the office, shoved and restrained by members of the inquisitorial squad and each member looked as uneasy as the next. His stomach turned when he saw Ginny held down by Goyle and he fought to get out of Graham Montegue's hold but it was useless when Umbridge mindlessly cast a spell to subdue him.
Harry was sat in the chair in the centre of the room, the first to be questioned with Umbridge hovering dangerously close to him, her temper boiling over as she speaks frantically in his face.
"You were going to Dumbledore weren't you?" She says, leaning down threateningly in front of Harry.
"No," Harry responds.
"Liar!" She screams back and in a move that shocks each member of the DA, she pulls back her hand and slaps Harry hard around the face, the harsh sound echoing through the otherwise silent room.
She pauses for a moment, simply glaring at Harry until her face twists into a sick, twisted grin as she straightens up and composes herself, each movement carefully thought out as she turns her back to him.
"Very well, you give me no choice Potter," she says with an even cadence, her tone dangerously low. "As this is an issue of Ministry security, you leave me with... no alternative, unless Professor Snape arrives within moments."
Fred feels like he can hardly breathe, the tension and unease in the air so thick that the room feels like it's getting smaller by the second. The unpredictability of the woman before them was alarming, the dangerous undertone of her voice despite her light and breezy tone was almost scarier than his worst nightmare.
"The cruciatus curse ought to loosen your tongue," she says, adjusting her pink jacket.
"That's illegal," Hermione states in outrage but Umbridge hardly flinches. Instead, she reaches out for the photo frame of the minister on her desk and pauses briefly to look at it before turning it over and lying it down flat on the desk, so that Fudge could not see her next move. She straightens herself and extends her wand, only to stop when Snape appears by the door, his eyes fixed to her outstretched wand that was pointed directly at Harry.
"You sent for me Headmistress?"
"Snape, yes," she says, taking a step back and everyone in the room exhales, relaxing only slightly. "The time has come for answers, wether he wants to give them to me or not," she says, her eyes flicking to Harry only briefly.
"Might I suggest against the cruciatus curse this time headmistress," he says evenly and carefully, "the consequences of such an audience might be... disagreeable. In fact I would hesitate in conducting any of the prior disciplinary methods in this instance.""
This time? She'd used the cruciatus curse before? And on a student? Prior disciplinary methods? Fred thinks, did he mean the quill?
"Very well," she says after a moment of pondering, her arm falling to her side as she relents, eyes wandering over the all too familiar Quill that sits proudly on her desk before her gaze shifts back to Snape. "Have you brought the veritaserum?"
"I'm afraid you've used up all my stores, the last of it interrogating Miss y/l/n."
Snape carries on speaking but Fred doesn't hear a single word, blood rushing to his ears as his heart pounds. He feels like he's received a stray bludger straight to the chest, his stomach dropping with fresh shame, sadness and overwhelming guilt.
Suddenly it all made sense. She'd tortured you into giving out the information- the cruciatus curse, veritaserum, what else had she done to you?
He couldn't help but let out a dry sob at the information, sensing everyone's eyes on him at the news. He struggled against the holds with everything in him, needing to fix what he'd broken.
He'd believed them, so quickly, believed that you could have betrayed them like that. The pain you must have felt, the loneliness and the guilt and then after your whole ordeal he had cast you aside, pushed you away and never given you a single chance to explain.
He eventually turned to look at George who looked utterly broken by the news, his regretful inner thoughts so evident upon his face. Each member of the DA looked a mixture of guilty, sheepish and sad, realising how wrong they'd been about you and what they'd done to someone who had once been their friend, someone who had suffered so much for all of them.
The meeting seemed to go abhorrently slowly until Umbridge left with Harry and Hermione on a sort of mission based upon a quickly constructed lie and Fred didn't waste a single moment before turning around on the spot and punching Graham Montegue straight in the face as soon as Umbridge had left. Seizing the momentary upper hand, the remaining members of the DA turned on the inquisitorial squad and fired an array of jinxes and spells at them in order to get away.
"Fred, Go!" George had urged whilst stunning Crabbe, allowing Ginny to step free. Malfoy fought back but he was quickly matched by Angelina who covered for Fred, blocking the exit.
"Go, she needs you!" Angelina shouted as she sent a jinx flying towards Cassius Warrington's smug face.
Fred didn't hang about and immediately ran out of the office and towards the common room where he was praying you'd be. It was quiet on the main staircases, perhaps it seemed much quieter because of the lack of portraits and bare walls but even to the few people Fred passed, he offered no explanation nor cared about what they thought. He needed to find you.
"Y/n!" He said bursting through the portrait hole and scanning the common room for you, checking the chair you'd so often occupied but found nothing except a couple of bewildered faces at his strange outburst.
"Y/n?" He called again, walking up the stairs towards the dormitories but received no reply. In his haste, he accidentally misstepped as he climbed up to the girls dorm and nearly triggered the blocking slide to appease but fortunately managed to regain his balance and stress carefully over the path he'd taken so many times before, the secret message in the steps that allowed him to breach the rules.
He threw open your dormitory door and stopped blankly when he found nothing. Your bed looked like it hadn't been slept in, there was hardly any of your things around the bed and the room. Had he come to the wrong room?
"Fred?" Your voice said shyly from behind him and he whipped around to see you looking up at him hesitantly from near the door, holding a few things in your arms and your robe tied tightly around your chest.
"Y/n," he says with a sigh of relief, moving forwards quickly to reach out to you but once again stopping short as he noticed you visibly flinch at his sudden movement. Suddenly the overwhelming agony of guilt and regret hit him anew and he vowed to slow down, hoping not to scare you away.
"I'm so sorry," he said, voice breaking slightly as he looked at your tired, sullen face and those wide, scared eyes. He'd never seen you look so broken and it killed him.
"I didn't, I don't ," he stutters, dropping to sit on the side of your bed. "You haven't been sleeping here have you?"
There's a minor pause and he wonders if you're actually going to reply to him, if he even deserves it, until you step forward and place your things down onto the bedside table. He watches in silence, noting the large book and a few packaged bandages that slip onto the table as you gingerly take a seat beside him, your feet no longer touching the floor.
"Kind of hard to when you're banished by the rest of your dorm," you reply quietly. He can't detect the tone of your voice, expecting it to be sarcastic or unhappy but it actually sounds flat and completely void of emotion.
"The chair," he realises, "you've been sleeping in that chair?" He's slightly bewildered and profoundly ashamed now, not having clicked until now that you'd been there early in a morning and late in the night, much later than you'd ever typically stayed up before. You shrug and turn your attention away, though you're yet to actually meet his eyes.
He drags a deep breath in through his teeth, resisting the urge to hang his head low on his shoulders.
"Y/n, I am so sorry, I, I don't even have words," he says, stumbling over his words- something so uncharacteristic for him that it briefly startles you. "You didn't deserve this, even if you had told Umbridge about us, no one deserves this. We were all so shocked that it could be you, of all people. We never stopped to think of why," he pauses again, steadying himself. "Snape admitted what she did to you, she tried to use it on Harry but he stopped him."
"But the quill was broken? How could she use it on Harry?" You say, finally looking up with a look of complete confusion.
"What quill?" Fred asks, completely lost himself, "the black quills? I meant the cruciatus curse, she, I mean she, on you, didn't she?"
Your silence says everything and he has to close his eyes and steady his breathing at your silent confirmation.
"What quill?" Fred feels a little bolder now and reaches for you but you pull your arm back and place it in your lap, trying not to wince as you catch the healing scars. "This one?"
He holds out his hand and shows you the faint markings from his punishment, 'I must not break rules' barely visible now. He frowns when you shake your head but don't offer any other explanation. He's frustrated that he's not getting anywhere but it's internal and he knows it's not your fault, he just wishes he could help, or go back in time and fix everything.
"Tell me, please," he says, keeping his eyes locked in the side of your face, trying to urge you to look at him. "What happened in that detention?"
"It doesn't matter," you say quickly, hopping down off the bed and stepping over to your trunk to get a fresh shirt from the laundry pile, knowing it would need changing. "I've got to shower."
You go to turn away but Fred lunges for you and grabs your arm to stop you from leaving, making you cry out in pain as soon as his fingers make contact with the tender skin. As soon as the shock wears off, he frowns, looking down at your arm before looking up to your face, seeing tears falling down your cheeks.
"Please baby, please just tell me," he says, voice breaking as his own tears well up in his eyes.
"She told you about the veritaserum?" You ask, assuming anyway and Fred nods. "Then you know what you need to know."
"No, I don't," he says quickly, trying to think of ways to stop you leaving without hurting you. "She used an unforgivable curse on you! Gave you truth serum, you cried when I touched your arm and you have bandages on your bedside table, please just tell me what happened!"
"Fine," you say, pulling your arm back. "You want to know? She tried to force it out of me, tried to get me to drink the stupid tea but I wouldn't. When that didn't work she pulled out that little stupid quill and wrote anything she wanted all over me. You wanted to know about the bandages? Fine," you said viciously, clawing at the fastening of your robe. Underneath was your once crisp, white shirt that had a considerable amount of red blood staining the sleeve. You didn't stop undressing, all but ripping the buttons away as you fought to show Fred what was underneath.
Bandages littered your forearms, with blood oozing out the sides. Fred's frozen as he looks at the bandages on your body, sick to his stomach already.
"Did you know Snape is a skilled occlumens? I didn't, I do now. So after she was playing with that sadistic little quill, writing whatever she wanted into my skin, he enters my mind and shows me every single fear I've ever had, every nightmare. But I didn't say a word, not a single fucking word. Do you know what it's like to have visions forced into your own mind of your boyfriend dying in front of you repeatedly, over and over until you start to go mad? All whilst your skin is slashed open just to get you to talk? Only it didn't work, so she dropped the quill and picked up her wand. I've never felt closer to death in my life but still so far away from it. But I wouldn't talk. So she forced veritaserum in my mouth and I couldn't stop it, she got what she wanted no matter what I'd fought for. And the best part? They don't heal, not truly. Nothing I do stops it, like a constant reminder of what happened."
"Princess," Fred chokes out, tears streaming down his cheeks, fighting to hold back his sobs at your words.
"No, not princess," you say sternly, emotions all falling from your face. "Not anymore."
"Please, I want to make this right, anything I can do, I want to support you," he says, nearly begging. "I have to make this right, I can't lose you."
"No."
Your voice is harsh and stern, your face expressionless again. "You believed them so easily, you all did. You believed I could do that to you, without hesitation. You didn't let me explain, never even looked at me because you were so certain that I could have done it. I've been exiled, banished and forgotten by all of you I called friends without a single thought. So you and your stupid brother and the rest of Dumbledore's friggin army can go fuck yourselves, it's not my fight anymore."
Fred flinches as the door slams shut behind you and he's left to sob openly, his devastation consuming him. Eventually when he returns to his own dorm, George says nothing upon seeing his twin's stricken face and his curtains fully closing around the bed.
The next morning, Fred has already left the dorm by the time George wakes up and doesn't see him at all around the common room or the hall, though he's not surprised. But when he doesn't show to his lessons, George worries and goes in search for his twin with increasing worry. Eventually, he finds him in the library, pouring over an array of books from the restricted section, most of them about healing spells and anatomy.
"Freddie?"
When Fred looks up with red rimmed eyes and an intense look in his eyes, it's clear to George that Fred hadn't slept. "Whatever it is, let me help."
One week. It took one week of endlessly pouring over book after book until they finally found options.
It's early morning on a Saturday when Fred creeps down to the common room was before the sun has risen, seeing you hunched over in your chair. Angelina had told him that they'd apologised profusely to you and had accepted you back with open arms back to the dormitory but you'd simply walked away and carried on sleeping by the fire, not yet willing to forgive them for the treatment you'd endured.
"Y/n, y/n, wake up," he says quietly, carefully touching your shoulder, trying to avoid anywhere that he had seen bandaged.
"Freddie?" You ask sleepily and his heart soars with hope at the noise, the familiarity of it abs the softness of your voice so heartwarming.
"I have something to show you, me and George," he says lightly, waiting for you to wake up.
"Told you both to get fucked," you mumble, squashing any hope he had, but he perseveres.
"Just this once prince-y/n, please," he says quietly. You open your eyes, seeing him still dressed in his pyjamas, pleading with his eyes and looking so vulnerable that you relent and agree to whatever he had planned. Throwing back the blanket, you surprise a groan at the stiffness in your neck and diligently follow him back up the stairs towards his dorm, accepting his hand as he guides you. Your hand fits perfectly into his, just as it always had.
"Where's Lee?" You say as you walk into the dorm room, seeing only George who gives you a small but timid smile.
"Bunking with Ron," Fred says somewhat vaguely, gesturing for you to sit on his bed. The room looks exactly as you remember albeit slightly less dishevelled than you'd experienced previously, but you don't mention anything. Fred takes a seat beside you and George moves forward, grabbing a book from the chair beside his bed.
"We don't know if this will work," George says.
"But it's better than nothing," Fred finishes, gingerly reaching out for your hand.
"What?"
"The wounds," George says gently, "Fred told me, we just want to make them better. Might not get rid of them completely but it's worth a shot."
"Found this in an old healing book, it's a counter curse for wound healing by curse," Fred says, taking the book from George to show you. "Figured Umbridge's quill must have been cursed so this might work. Please let us help."
All it takes is a nod from you, albeit slightly hesitant but truthfully there was no one you trusted more than the twins, before at least.
You could hardly look them in the eyes as you pulled away the bandages, the vile words etched into your skin by her personal sadistic quill. You heard George inhale at the deepest cut along your inner right forearm but didn't react, knowing it would be shocking to anyone.
"Take my hand, if it hurts too much all you have to do is squeeze and we'll stop, okay baby?"
Biting down on your lip to stifle your cries, you hold Fred's hand tightly as George begins to cast the counter-curse, each of you watching on with rapt attention and slight amazement as the cuts begin to slowly knit together. It was working.
You whimper as he works over the deepest, the same one Fred had accidentally caught the week before and Fred's hand squeezes yours automatically for support.
"You're doing so well sweetheart, it'll be over soon I promise," he says quietly in your ear, comforting you in anyway he could.
After the last cut is sealed, George immediately drops down to sit onto his bed, his concentration and energy depleted from focusing so hard. You can't believe it as you look down at your arms, no longer seeing blood and only able to see the faintest of marks and redness where the wounds had once been. Only then do tears begin to fall from your eyes as you launch yourself towards Fred, throwing your arms around him in appreciation. He steadies himself after a moment of being caught off guard and holds you tightly against him, shushing you gently as you cry. His arms wrap around you so perfectly, so protectively and his smell comforts you like to no other, exactly as you remember.
"You did so well, so well, it's okay baby," he coos into your ear. You pull apart slowly and immediately walk over to George, pulling him into a hug though it's a lot less intimate.
"Thank you both so much," you sniffle.
"You're welcome," they answer at the same time, making you smile.
"We've missed you," George says after a moment. "I'm so sorry for what you went through and for what I said. I should have known it wasn't your fault, you've been my best friend for so long and I'm so ashamed of myself for how easily I believed her over you, that should never have happened."
"And you know how sorry I am," Fred says, walking over to you and kneeling down until he's directly in front of you.
"You're the best thing that has ever happened to me and I was an idiot for ever thinking it was you. I know things can't ever go back to how they were before, but I love you so much that I can't lose you. Seeing you hurting almost broke me and I know that you might need time or never see me again but you need to know exactly how I still feel about you."
"It's not just you," you say in reply, heaving out a long breathe, "I pushed people away."
"We deserved it," George says.
"Baby," Fred says gently, getting your attention. "I don't know how to fix this or how to make things better, but I'll do anything. I was an idiot, a complete git but I'll spent the rest of my life trying to make it up to you. Please say this isn't ruined."
For the first time since the incident, you allow yourself to feel hopeful that things could get better, that Fred could love you again. Sat surrounded by the two people you loved most in the world, you finally felt the love and protection you'd been needing since that awful night.
"I want that," you say quietly, picking at the blanket under your fingers, "I just want things to just go back to normal." You raise your eyes up to Fred's to see him smiling back at you, clearly pleased with your words.
"Well, let's start with this then," he says with a mischievous smirk, leaning towards you painfully slowly as if he's giving you plenty of time to say no or push him away. His soft lips press against yours gently and you can't help but feel a warmth spread all over your body, almost like you were defrosting and returning back to you're usual self. His hand reaches up to cup the side of your jaw and you're certain you can feel a fear hit your cheek, though it doesn't come from you.
The next morning, you walk hand in hand with Fred into the great hall for breakfast and sit right back at the centre of the table with your friends. You assume Fred or George had threatened them not to say anything as everyone around you acts normal, pretending the previous weeks didn't exist, though one by one they all apologised to you, most notably Ron and Harry. Ginny thought you were badass for everything you'd been through, not relenting even though you'd been tortured into eventually revealing the secret. Hermione had apologised so eloquently and thoroughly that you both ended up crying in the common room as she explained about the jinxed parchment and how she'd held out hope that it hadn't been you.
Each person made it up to you in anyway they could, admitting their mistakes and regrets and though you would probably never forget, you chose to forgive.
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