#like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like
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omw to play emotional support for my mom disguised as ✨fun family bonding time✨ for the rest of the week <3333 there's something so deeply wrong with me uwu teehee
#and i still havent texted my friend back even tho she texted me a week ago and i told her ill text her back this week when i have the time#and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again#have to pretend im not at the very brink of a serious mental and emotional breakdown. is making me lose my fucking mind#ik she's having a bad time rn and she needs the reassurance and jesus fucking christ i tried i had two long conversations with her#that were allllll about her. only her. not a single word about me. that's fine. this is what people need in such moments right#to just get patted on the head and hugged and told their suffering is real and what happened to them is unfair and just made to feel#that for a moment they're the centre of attention and it is all about them. this is normal. this is why therapy exists.#so i try to give this to her but it is fucking draining. and i NEVER get the same treatment back. like she caught me crying at uni last week#and like yes she'll say some nice things but she'll always find a way to turn the conversation back on the topic of ✨her✨#like we started talking about my therapy and i finally got to actually say a word or two about what im dealing with. but then she goes#'yeah im just trying to figure out what's wrong with me when i listen to you haha like i could never cut myself cause it looks ugly.#ofc it doesnt look ugly on you haha but i could never lol'#like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like#i spent over an hour a few days back sitting with you and listening to your talk about your childhood and validating you and not saying#a word a single fucking word about myself even tho i was also going through it myself but who cares right. and now im the bad guy again#because im not texting back.#i feel like im finally fucking snapping cause at this point im properly fucking angry. IM having a bad time too. IM going through it too.#I have bad coping skills and had a fucked up childhood and traumas in my life TOO and im allowed to just not be able to handle it#i really wanna break something lol maybe therapy's working after all lmao#oh also this is why i dont eat breakfast. i do it once and then feel guilty and suicidal lol normal behaviour#pojebie mnie zaraz przysięgam na boga mam dość kurwa BASTA
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Unhealthy Obsession
a/n hiii angels! sorry for the wait im backkk and i will have the next chapter out soon if you want to be apart of the tag list let me know and i will add you:)) Updated: hi pookies I'm in the car rn traveling to Louisiana from cali so i have alot of time on my hands to try and finish some stories that are in my drafts:) btw dont be shy request stuff:))
tag list: @quicksilversg1rl @pearls4valentine @adamsbubblegumbitch @urhotfathdr
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part one
part two
part three
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tw: 18+ If you don't like smut then please don't read… beyond this there is partying, underage drinking and smoking, adult language, sex, fingering, touching, and kissing.
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part four: time of my life
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You had just walked out the front door just in time for Charlie to be pulling up. You walked over to his car about to get the door when he gets out and walks over to you.
“you look gorgeous.”
you smile “Why thank you Charlie”
“Here lemme get the car door” he opens the door
“thank you” You aren’t used to anyone guys acting like gentlemen considering your father was a dipshit and every guy you’ve dated has been a complete dumb fuck. You get in the car and asure him your all good and he shuts the door. He gets in and looks over at you.
“you do look beautiful y/n” This makes you smile as you look into his blue eyes. Every time you do you get lost in his eyes you glance over every facial feature he is like art perfect.
“thank you Charlie you don’t look too bad yourself,” you said with a smirk he was wearing dark blue jeans a white button-down, and black Converse. You put on your seatbelt and smiled at him. “thank you haha. Okay, are you ready to go?”
“yeah yeah when we get there ill help you set everything up” You smiled he had already started driving “Really? Thank you thank you I wasn't gonna ask you too I didn't wanna make your work cause I mean I invited you as a guest yk?” you giggled “no yeah its okay char of course ill help do you know when Robbie is gonna get there?”
“yeah he should be there around 7:15 ish so we will have just a little time where it's just us” You were looking down at your thighs playing with your ring. You look up at Charlie's hands on the steering wheel. Holy fucking shit he has nice hands I bet he is good with them. You thought to yourself.
Then charlie said “Are you okay? your staring…”
“wait huh oh sorry,” you say trying not to make it awkward knowing you just got caught staring at his hands. You start to say something when you're cut off by his hand finding its way to your thigh. You look and his hand and then at him your cheeks starting to go pink.
He doesn't look at you. All he says is. “well this is what you wanted right? I mean why else would you be staring at him? I bet you imagining more than just this tho right?” he says in a teasing tone. You froze unable to respond. Dear god, you thought charlie walker was this shy nerdy virgin who had never touched a woman where the fuck did this confidence come from.
“I- uhm yeah” you stammer out. You take a deep breath and find some confidence and put your hand on top of his and move it towards your inner thigh a bit. You see him start to blush knowing his boost of confidence was coming to an end and he was getting nervous. It was honestly cute because you knew you were his weakness. But just as you thought he was too nervous to do anything else. He moves his hand up your dress. His hand is resting just below your panties.
When he does this your breath hitches. At this point, it wasn’t a want it was a need you could feel yourself throbbing you needed him to keep going.
Just as you were gonna say anything you guys pull into this dirt parking lot where there is an old barn which is where the sabbathon is taking place. He removes his hands from your thigh and parks. You grab your bag and decide to fix your lipgloss real quick when you're done you see Charlie getting the car door again. “you are so beautiful” he says while admiring you. You get out of the car. “thank you char” He shuts the car door and you turn to face him. You look up at him. You wanted to kiss him. while using the triangle method he put moves your hair out of your face and behind your ear. “can I kiss you?”
Without responding you kiss him. The kiss slowly turning to a make out he has you pinned against the car his hands exploring your body. In between kisses he murmurs “so perfect”. He starts kissing down your neck leaving a few hickies on your neck and collarbone. He bites you a bit on your neck causing you to whimper. His hands travel down your body and up your dress. “Wait,” you say. “is everything okay” he stops kinda scared he did something wrong. “what time did you say Robbie is gonna be here?”
“around 7:1-” his phone rings. It's Robbie he picks it up
“Hello?”
“I'm sorry Charlie is running a little bit late ill probably be there around 7:30”
“it's okay dont worry me and Y/n can set up I don't think people are gonna start showing up till at least 8:30”
“ok ok see you at 7:30 maybe”
-he hangs up the phone-
Charlie turns back towards you and smiles. “well Robbie is running a lil late but do you wanna go inside n set up so we can chill out till people get here?”
“sure” You guys grab a few things out of the car and the chairs are already inside you just had to set them up. Charlie set up the projector and stuff while you set up chairs. When you guys are done you can't wait any longer and throw yourself onto him kissing him hard. he puts his hands on your waist backing you into the wall. This time he doesn't wait to slide his hands into your panties drawing small circles on your clit causing you to whimper but you are trying to stay quiet
“nono I want to hear your pretty noises angel” he kisses you while pumping and curling two fingers in and out of your aching pussy. You moan into the kiss knowing your gonna cum soon. “Charlie” you whimper out “Yes angel?” he says
“m gonna cum” he continues pumping his finger in and out a little harder and touches your clit. You are a whimpering mess. “Shh shh, I know I know” You feel the pressure in your stomach release as you whimper his name and cum all over his hands. taking a few deep breathes you look up at Charlie. “you did so well for me angel” he says
“Now be good open up” You open your mouth and suck his fingers clean. “good girl,” He says while having a hand on your jaw making you look up at him. He Gives you a quick kiss and pulls you into a hug hands around your waist and slightly rubbing your back. “you did so good are you okay?”
“yes I'm okay thank you Charlie I didn’t know you were so good with your hands” you kinda giggle and pull out from the hug. “well I’ve thought abt this situation a lot and I just wanna make you feel good” What you didn’t know is thinking about this happening isn’t the only thing he has done. But we will get to that another time. He checks his phone its 7:45 and robbie isnt here yet but kirby is parking and walks in to you and charlie standing close together looking at his phone and giggling at something. Kirby is jealous but doesn't say anything abt it.
“hiii” you look up to see kirby
“Helloo Kirby” You hug her and she hugs Charlie but not a friend hug you notice but shove it off. “I have drinks in my car and Jill is on her way. Also I few of the football players are picking up a keg”
“Okay cool,” Charlie says smiling at Kirby. You can see the way he looks at her. You wonder if you're just reading too much into things Or if Kirby had a chance with him. Like I know he was just making out with you and fingering you but you honestly thought he wanted her.
It’s hard because Kirby is your friend and you font wanna let a boy come between you guys but Charlie wasn’t just any boy you were falling for him And you couldn’t risk losing him…
#rory culkin#i need him#charlie walker#rory culkin is so fine#husband#charlie walker fanfic#long hair boys#rory is so fine#charlie walker smut#on my knees rn#unhealthy obession
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Cigarettes and Slow Dances
Characters: Steve Harrington, Reader Word Count: 1,481 Warnings: Cuteness, I suppose. Smoking. That’s it really. lol A/N: I finished Stranger Things on Monday, and I really feel like Steve just deserves all the things and the happiness, and love. This popped into my head. It is unbeta’d, so all mistakes are mine, and I’m not even sure it makes sense. haha Although it does make me want to fill in the backstory, so we’ll see. Anyway. This is for @escabell, because our conversation inspired it. I’ll also tag @trexrambling, since I know she binge watched it just as hard as I did, but I won’t tag anyone else since I’m not sure who all is about Stranger Things. Enjoy!
Steve watched as Dustin strutted into the school, and couldn't help but chuckle when he saw him stop in front of the window next to the door and check his hair in the reflection. Dustin may be a little shithead, much like the rest of their rag tag group of friends, but Steve couldn’t help but like the kid.
Dustin disappeared inside and just as Steve shifted the car into gear, he saw Nancy laughing as she dipped punch into someone’s cup. He couldn't see Jonathan, but he knew he was in there. Mike had complained how stupid it was that she was practically a chaperone, and Will had agreed because Jonathan was also going to be there. At least, that's what Dustin had told him on the way over. His heart ached, but she looked happy. In the end, that's what was important.
His eyes dropped to the steering wheel and he stared at his hands for a moment, his knuckles white as he gripped it tightly, and sighed. “This is stupid,” he muttered under his breath. He brought his eyes back up to the road, but noticed another figure; this time, sitting on the curb, alone.
It was Y/N, wrapped up in an ill-fitting coat that was far too big and trying to light a cigarette with trembling hands. He watched as she took a drag and immediately began coughing, waving a hand in front of her to clear out the smoke. He put the car in park and climbed out, then quietly made his way to where she was, his hands jammed in his pockets.
“Those things will kill you, ya know.” She looked up at him and he smiled, and for the first time in days, it was genuine.
“Yea, well...after the past few weeks, what in this town isn’t trying to kill me?”
“Fair enough.” He sat down next to her and held out his hand. She silently handed him the cigarette and he took a slow drag, his eyes slipping shut as he relished the bitter taste of the tobacco. “I haven’t had one in a few weeks, thought maybe I should quit.” He handed it back to her and she tried again. This time, she was able to inhale without choking, and her mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ as she exhaled the smoke.
“Doesn’t look like you’re doing a very good job,” her tone was somewhat flat, but she said it with a smile. Steve suddenly realized just how pretty that smile was.
“Yea, well...I never said I was.” He held his hand out again and she handed him the entire crumpled pack.
“I don’t think I’m going to keep it up. You can have ‘em.” They fell silent, the only sound the crinkle of Steve opening up the cigarette pack, then the click of the lighter as he flicked it to life.
“What are you doing out here, anyway?”
She shrugged, “I dropped off my kid brother. Seems weird for them to be doing something as normal as a Snow Ball, but it’s not like he knows any better. I didn’t feel like going home just yet, feels weird just leaving him.” She wrapped her arms tight around herself and looked up at the sky. “Do you think it’s really over?”
Steve took another drag from his cigarette. “I don’t know,” he said as he exhaled, “I heard Hopper say something about that scientist guy still being alive, I guess El told him she’d heard something from one of his nurses or something. As far as the ….demogorgons, or whatever the hell Dustin and them were calling those things...I don’t know. Hopper said they all died when El closed the gate.”
She sighed, her eyes still on the sky, “But if the upside down is the size of Hawkins...I mean, it’s basically Hawkins, right? How do we know there aren’t more things in there?”
Steve shrugged, “I don’t know, Y/N...I guess we don’t know. But we do know how to handle that weird shit, and I for one have a give ‘em hell attitude, so I’m not too worried about it.”
Muffled music interrupted the otherwise quiet night as someone swung the door open, and though he couldn’t hear the words, Steve could tell that it was a slow song.
“Man, I can remember my first middle school dance, especially that first slow song. It was awkward as hell. I’ll never forget it, I danced with Caroline Miller, the most popular girl in 7th grade. I’m still not sure how I managed it, but she stayed with me the whole song. I’m pretty sure I stepped on her toes more than the floor.” He chuckled to himself, then looked at Y/N from the corner of his eye. She was staring at her hands and picking at the hem of the too long sleeve. “What about you?”
“I...uh...I only went once. I never actually danced, though.” She kept her head down, purposely avoiding Steve’s gaze. “I’ve never actually danced at any of them.”
Steve’s eyes widened in surprise, “Why not?”
“No one ever asked,” she muttered, so quiet that Steve almost didn’t hear her.
Steve frowned, suddenly angry at anyone that would have made her sad before. It occurred to him that he may have, at one point, been the cause of that sadness, and he stood suddenly, “Well, I can’t let that stand.”
She watched him in surprise as he walked over to his car and started it. She heard the static of a radio being turned on, then the rampant flipping of channels until Steve found what he was looking for. He shut the door and the music flowed through his open window. He walked over to Y/N and held his hand out, a smile pulling up the corner of his mouth. “Dance with me?”
She let him take her hand and pull her up from the curb, and he slipped both hands down to her waist.
Sometimes you picture me-- I'm walking too far ahead You're calling to me, I can't hear What you've said-- Then you say--go slow-- I fall behind-- The second hand unwinds
“Why are you being so nice to me?” she asked quietly as they swayed slowly.
Steve looked at her, confusion on his face, “Why wouldn’t I be?”
She shrugged, “I dunno...it’s just, we’ve gone to school together for years and we barely spoke until the whole ‘the world almost ended’ thing. We haven’t really even talked since then.”
If you're lost you can look--and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you--I'll be waiting Time after time
Steve stared at her for a moment as he thought about the past few weeks, and everything that had happened. He glanced over Y/N’s shoulder at Nancy, who was dancing with Dustin, before they disappeared into the crowd.
“Yea, sorry...it’s been...it’s been a long couple of weeks.” He looked back at her to find that she was staring at him. She quickly averted her eyes, and he had the sudden urge to lift her chin back up so he could look her in the eye. “I’ve been meaning to thank you...you know...for saving me. I should have done it sooner.”
She shook her head, “I didn’t really do anything. Anybody could have distracted those demo-dogs.”
This time, he allowed himself to gently tuck his finger under her chin and lifted it so that their eyes met, “Anybody could have, but you were the one that did it. So...thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
After my picture fades and darkness has Turned to gray Watching through windows--you're wondering If I'm OK Secrets stolen from deep inside The drum beats out of time--
They continued to sway back and forth silently. Steve pulled her in closer, hoping that she wouldn’t mind, and his heart sped up when he felt her arms tighten around his neck. Even though looking at Nancy still hurt and probably would for awhile, he was beginning to think that maybe he’d been missing out on something right in front of him. He pulled back a little so that he could look at her again and she tilted her head.
“What?”
“Oh..nothing...I just, umm...do you wanna go grab some food? I have to come back here to get Dustin anyway, so I could drop you off.” She smiled, and Steve thought that he’d like to be the cause of that more often.
“Yea, sure...sounds good.” They walked towards the car and he felt her hand slip into his.
Yea...he could get used to this.
If you're lost you can look--and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you--I'll be waiting Time after time
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