#because people can't just be normal and have fun

[alarajrogers]

If you want to make your whole identity about the shortage of serotonin in your neurological system, well, that's an interesting choice. But if not... depression is a malfunction that blocks your brain from doing what it is supposed to do, what your identity and self would otherwise dictate that it do. Medication doesn't change you, who you are, unless you identify as a person who can't do any of the things you want to do because you can't really want them, you don't have the energy to do them, or they don't make you happy the way they should.

Here is a vastly oversimplified description of one of our current theories of how depression works. There's some evidence that maybe this isn't quite how it goes, but we've been operating on this paradigm since the 90's and it's helped millions of people, so lets go with it for now.

There are three neurotransmitters that most antidepressants work on. You've got many others, but these are the ones they make most depression medication to affect, so we';ll talk about them. Vastly oversimplified: dopamine regulates desire and motivation, norepinephrine regulates energy flow, and serotonin regulates happiness, satisfaction, contentment... probably involved in other moods as well, but for this model, we're talking about happiness. (Not pleasure. That's dopamine and endorphins and oxytocin and I think maybe vasopressin. Just happiness.)

Let's say you're a normal person, no mood disorders, no dysregulation disorders, you don't have ADHD, you don't have fatigue, everything works great. You're not hungry and you're not tired, and you see something you want, or that you want to do. So here's what happens.

First, neurons recognize that that's something you want, based on the gestalt of all your memories and experiences and genetics -- who you are. This is a kind of wanting, but it's more like a precursor to the want most of us feel most of the time that we want things. It's more of a "hey, wouldn't it be nice if" feeling than a full desire. That comes next, though honestly, this is all happening too fast for you to perceive the stages.

Your neurons that recognize you want something release dopamine. Dopamine is the substrate of want. It is willpower and motivation. It's also cravings when levels get too high.

Now you feel the want. It's not a "hey, it would be cool if..." It's "I want that." It sounds like fun. Or it sounds like it would make you happy. You feel this desire. Maybe you see a basketball hoop and you really wanna shoot hoops. Maybe it's a video game icon and you really wanna play that game. Maybe it's triggered by a fleeting memory of riding a roller coaster and you really want to go to an amusement park. Maybe it's something that will objectively make your life better, like, you really want a clean kitchen. You don't want to clean the kitchen but you want the end result very badly.

Next, or maybe at the same time, your brain releases norepinephrine. Norepi controls energy flow -- where the energy resources of your body are going -- and in this case, it's directing energy to your brain and muscles so that you have the energy to do the thing. Remember, in this model, you're well-fed and well-rested and not sick, so there's no good reason for you not to have this energy.

So you have the energy, you do the thing... and you get the reward. Serotonin makes you feel happy and content. You did the thing, it felt good. Maybe a little dopamine to make you want to do it again, but right now, you are satisfied.

Now, I want you to imagine a comedy sketch where a guy is really hungry at a formal dinner where he's waiting for the food. And the servers lay a plate in front of him, and it's great, he's about to eat, it looks good, he's starving... and then the bussers take his plate away and throw it out before he has a chance to eat it.

Funny, in a comedy sketch. Absolutely devastating, if it happens in your brain.

Because there's a mechanism in your brain called reuptake, and it removes neurotransmitters you're done using. And if you didn't make enough of those neurotransmitters in the first place, or if reuptake is malfunctioning and triggering too early, then the busser is coming by and taking away your serotonin or your dopamine before you were done with it, and now you don't have any.

So you see the thing you want. But no dopamine releases to make you feel the want, so you are unmotivated to do it. Or, you have motivation, but you don't have enough norepi to have the energy to do it. Or, you had motivation and energy so you did it... but it didn't make you happy. There's no serotonin. Nothing will make you happy.

Reuptake inhibitors -- most of them working on serotonin, so they are SSRIs, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, but my medication in particular is a DNRI, a dopamine and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor, and there are other combos as well -- prevent the busser from taking your meal before you're done eating it. They ensure that there is sufficient available neurotransmitter for whatever emotion your brain is trying to trigger.

Let me repeat: your brain, full of your experiences and your genes and your memories, is trying to trigger an emotion based on all those things. The gestalt of you, the identity that you are, should be feeling an emotion. That emotion is caused by a neurotransmitter that the you of you is trying to summon. And if it's not there... you will not feel the emotion that your brain has decided you feel. This is interference with the operation of you. This is the process of you being cut off before it can run to natural completion. This is your emotion, based on who you are, being squashed because the chemicals that make you feel the emotion aren't there.

An SSRI cannot make you happy, but it can make it possible for you to be happy if your brain thinks you should be happy. A DNRI cannot make you want something, but it can make it possible for you to feel motivation and energy to do the thing you wanted to do. These medications do not change who you are. They cannot. They don't give you artifical serotonin or dopamine. To the best of my knowledge, this isn't biologically possible yet without sticking electrodes in your brain. That's science fiction. What they do is make sure that the available pool of neurotransmitters your brain draws from to make you feel the emotions that your brain thinks you should feel contain enough neurotransmitters to actually do the job.

The idea that antidepressants change who you are in any way whatsoever is absolute bullshit and needs to die in a fire. Antidepressants work to prevent a brain malfunction that causes interference with the emotions you should be feeling, based on who you are.

They can indeed have side effects. Paxil is known to cause sexual problems, and in teenagers has sometimes triggered the strength and motivation to carry out a suicide plan before it has improved mood enough to remove the desire to die. Prozac made me "anti-depressed"; it made me flat, no strong emotions at all. But there are many, many such medications. My depression manifested more as fatigue and lack of motivation, with the unhappiness coming from the feeling that I can't make myself do anything I want to do, so they gave me a DNRI and I've been on it for 22 years. The first week I took it, it made me a little high, full of energy and driven and needing less sleep, like a stimulant, but that wore off pretty fast and left me closer to normal than I'd been in the four years previous. Other people I know have had good luck with Zoloft or Cymbalta. They all operate in slightly different ways and affect different brain systems variably. Odds are, if you are depressed, one of them will work for you. And it won't change who you are. It will make it possible for you to be more like who you are than you can be with unmedicated depression.

(They are not perfect. I fight with the black dog a lot. They also don't block depressive, negative feelings when the trigger is real and very strong. I was just out of work for six months and over that time period spent most of my time playing video games and surfing Tumblr as my anxiety about my lack of money grew and my lack of energy or motivation deepened. I struggled to look for work as it got worse, which made me even more anxious because I knew, logically, if I didn't find work things would get even worse, but it started to feel so pointless and I felt helpless. So I didn't write, I didn't clean my house, I did look for work but maybe I could have looked harder, I didn't train my skills as much as I wanted... and now I have a job and my energy and motivation are back. If your situation warrants feelings of depression, no prescription can save you. Antidepressant medication is about allowing you to feel what you should be feeling. If what you should be feeling, rationally, is anxiety and unhappiness, they aren't gonna change that.)

90s movies: Psychopharmacology is as good as a lobotomy. If you take pills to treat your mental illness it will literally murder your imaginary friends and you will become a boring, lotus-eating conformist drone.

Me after taking my meds: drives the scenic route home to see if there are any geese on the pond and does a little dance in line at the grocery store and comes home to throw everything​ in my fridge into a stew pot because I can finally taste food again while singing songs at my birds in which I replace all the instances of "she" with "Cheese" and doing a Dolly Parton impression on the phone to my sister

[witherby]

If Mouse got traits from everyone, did anybody got traits from Mouse?

Oh, what a cute question! Let's say yes!

Dick learned to relax his standards for himself. Mouse isn't a vigilante, they don't have perfect grades, and they always take breaks or communicate when they simply can't or don't want to do something. Dick has started giving himself the same leniencies — he'll actually rest when he's sick instead of powering through it, he'll forgive himself for mistakes he's made, and if he simply doesn't want to do something, he won't. He's learning through Mouse to stop chasing perfectionism.

Jason picked up on Mouse's penchant for sleeping in. They like being in bed and being lazy. The world will still be there when they decide to grace the rest of the manor with their presence, so Jason adopts the same attitude. The perpetual bags under his eyes disappear in six months and his rage induced by the Pit becomes ten times more manageable. He and Mouse kickstart a mandatory Family Nap Time when it seems like everybody is running on empty.

Tim starts learning how to take things at face value. This family often has problems saying things outright, except for Mouse, who says what they mean and means what they say. If they're hungry, they're going to verbalize it. If they're disinterested in something, they're going to verbalize it. If they feel sick, they're going to verbalize it. No, Tim, they aren't actively starving to death or disinterested in a topic because they secretly hate you or seconds from dying of a plague. Please quit overanalyzing every little situation.

Damian grows a funny bone. He spent so long trying to shrug off the title of "youngest Wayne" and "baby bat" that he became almost grizzled about it. He's overly "no-nonsense" and acts more mature than he sometimes feels for the sake of being treated seriously, which costs him the leniency that comes with a normal childhood. Mouse's carefree mannerisms and easy optimism, as well as taking over the title of the baby of the family, allows Damian to let loose a little bit. Now he's more accepting of his desires to goof off and play games for the sake of having fun instead of being productive.

Alfred got the full Grandfather experience from Flittermouse. He's so used to being in a family of hyper-independent people that he didn't realize he wanted to feel needed. Because he knows that Bruce and Dick and Jason and Tim and Damian are perfectly fine without him. They don't need him to cook, or clean, or tend to their wounds, or help them with anything, really. They want him around, though, because they love him and he all of them, which is enough for him.

But a baby? Babies need to be tended to. They need attention. They need care. They need to be fed and clothed and cuddled and doted on. And Alfred didn't realize how much he missed doting on little Bruce when he was a child until he was gifted the chance to do it again with Mouse.

Hal learns how to be a parent with Mouse. He develops patience so, so quickly, because you have no choice when you're taking care of a brand new human who's never human'd before. He also secretly uses parenting tricks he's learned raising you on some of the planets he's called to oversee and communicate with diplomatically. Gentle parenting a whole race of K'inleons into avoiding war with another planet was not on his bucket list but damn was it effective. And, like Jason, he learns to stop and rest with Mouse, too. Maybe he doesn't need to pick up extra missions as a Lantern and stay up late patrolling his sector of the universe after doing a check just hours before. Maybe he can just stay on Earth and rest and be Hal.

Bruce would've picked up Mouse's easy capacity to love if they didn't already learn that from him. Bruce's one, fundamental trait is his optimism and capacity to believe in second chances. But Mouse does teach him to communicate more effectively with his loved ones. He slowly but surely gets over his fear that muttering the words "I love you" will not end in that person's death. He allows himself to display his vulnerabilities and admit when he's tired or wounded, instead of soldiering on after the battle is won.

[inawickedlittletown]

Decided to rewatch S8 and I made it to 8x06.

Ugh. This episode.

This is the first time I'm rewatching it since it aired and I couldn't make myself rewatch it before, but I'm watching it now and gah the writing.

Under a cut because this got long...

I'm not even too bothered by the anniversary dinner. The woman approaching them is whatever in the long run...Buck is awkward but it's very Buck to be like that so that doesn't bother me. Tommy's reaction to it also not a problem. Buck acting like he doesn't know his boyfriend is gay? Writers WTF. This is the type of conversation that would be normal a few dates in not 6 months in. It's actually very reminiscent of stuff from their first date.

It's the way they didn't know how to bring up Abby and so gave us this convoluted way to bring it about and it's very clear to me on a rewatch that they're trying to make sure the casual heterosexual audience understands things. Like they want to reestablish that we know for sure that Tommy is gay and Buck is still attracted to women but also lets not use the word bisexual. And oh the shock value of it because take out the Abby of it all and the break up still works the same way...they did the Abby thing just for the hell of it.

It's bad writing.

The next thing that makes me cringe is Buck's scene with Maddie and Josh. In the past we've seen Maddie listen to Buck and maybe poke fun at him a little but always in a kind way and then she gives him advice.

Maddie in this scene is acting so strange (actually Maddie this whole episode is not acting quite herself). I know some people have an issue with Josh's speech about Glee but tbh I don't think it's that bad and I didn't the first time I watched it. I think he has good motives in saying it. My issue is with Maddie.

Her joke about Abby turning men gay, the way she explains to Josh that Buck slept with Tommy's fiance changing the facts entirely just to mess with Buck, the way that she just very clearly thinks Buck is being dramatic and ridiculous. She just doesn't take Buck seriously at all and when Buck calls her out on it she turns it around on him because as she says she doesn't think there's a problem. But it's not about if there is a problem with them having both dated Abby, it's how Buck feels about it that he needs advice on.

Josh for all that I do think he is helpful, he also does not know Tommy and shouldn't speak to what Tommy experienced. Buck voices his concerns that he thought he knew who Tommy was but now he's finding out that Tommy lied and hurt Abby and it's thrown him because he's having to meld those two versions of Tommy.

Buck doesn't think that Tommy will do the same to him and Tommy doesn't. He doesn't lie to Buck or string him along. He's actually very honest with him and that honesty contributes to the break up. Yet another way in which we see that Tommy has changed from who he used to be.

The thing is that Josh doesn't know Tommy and admits as much but he gives Buck some broad thing about glee and what the world was like before it and after but he's basing it on his own experiences and the queer experience is not a shared trauma...and he puts in Buck's mind that he can't judge Tommy and also that he should thank him. Buck clearly internalizes this. He also I think it suddenly forced to think about what he wants from a future with Tommy and he jumps at wanting to live with him.

Now onto the actual break up.

The whole scene is actually good. They're cute together and silly and flirty and even after the Abby thing is revealed to Tommy nothing has fallen apart. It's all kinda good and their conversation is actually great. When Buck says he admires him, Tommy seems to like that...or at least he takes it how Buck intends it.

This is where it falls apart. And considering I refused to watch this again until now I didn't really think about it like this until now.

Yes I think Tommy had his eyes opened a little bit with everything Buck said...but Tommy also could have ended the conversation at the point where Buck tells him he admires him and they could have gone to the movies and just continued their date night. Why? Because Tommy already sorta knows this and it's what's he's expected from it...he already knows this is Buck's first relationship with a man and that as such Buck must feel some gratitude for what Tommy has given him and he's clearly in his mind already decided that it will end eventually because as he tells Buck first is not last (Tommy, who hurt you?).

But then Buck asks Tommy to move in. And Tommy can't.

It's one thing for him to date the baby bi guy...for him to get feelings for him that maybe go deep but that are manageable. He can handle that...but moving in together? For Buck to dangle that to him and offer him a future when Tommy doesn't expect that Buck will be able to deliver it? That's where Tommy just can't because he knows it will hurt when they break up...but if they live together and form deeper attachments and routines and they become intrinsically a part of each other's lives in a home they share then that's not heartbreak he's prepared to face. It's heartbreak he knows he won't survive.

I actually don't see the break up as bad writing. Everything else surrounding it absolutely is, but that scene is heartbreaking because they both want the same exact thing but Buck couldn't reassure Tommy that he really did want for them to be together...he didn't even tell him he loved him...and Tommy needs more from Buck to be secure in thinking that in this instance first could also be the last.

I think we learn so much about Tommy in this episode and I wish we had been able to dive in deeper.

This episode still hurts. Tommy's face when he says "Buck" hurts. The way Buck is left behind hurts.

The writing is a mixed bag of bad with some alright moments. It also leaves so much open. I remember that night being optimistic because it is so clearly a storyline left open to be continued. Some interviews turned that optimism right around but without that there is no real reason for any of us to think that this is finished.

Do I think it was a bad idea to break them up? Absolutely. Do I think there are other forms of tension for them to explore? Yes. Do I think they will manage to give this story and Buck and Tommy a happier ending? I have no idea, but I hope so.

Buck himself calls his relationship with Tommy the most transformative since Abby. He misses Tommy so much he spends the next couple of episodes baking and wanting to reach out. We also know that Tommy wants to reach back out too. These are indications that it isn't over and I just hope that they stick to being a little cliche and following the romcom trope right through to the end where they get back together.

I guess that's where I am going into 8b. Hopeful, but not holding my breath and well aware that fanfic exists and so much of the scenarios we want for our blorbos will only ever be possible there. Oh, and I'll be shipping Buck with Tommy because that is definitely not changing no matter what the show does.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

The Miraculous fandom has some of the most creative people I know in it. I mean this, positive sense.

However that same talent becomes a problem when people cannot distinguish between a narrative beat and their own post-hoc justification.

The second is useful now and again when any sort of media misses a beat or takes a leap. ML fans carry the narrative on their backs.

It's telling that you have so many fanworks out there that are equally or more valid readings of the canon when they were published that have been completely obliterated by future development.

I'm not talking the wild takes. I'm not talking ML suddenly turning shonen, or coffee shop AU. I'm not even talking 'Adrien gets equal screen time.' Just 'with what we know, what comes next?' type fanfiction.

It's like canon is deliberately trying to dodge anything remotely predictable... but narrative beats are predictable for a reason. They work. They're good storytelling. A twist can be good storytelling, but only if it is better in every way then the not-twist.

You combine the shock-at-all-costs mentality with ML fandoms devotion and creativity and you get leaps of logic that would make a crypto seller blush. It ends up going downright unhealthy places at times.

I know their hearts are in the right place. I know they just care about the show they've sunk time and self into, but there are times you have to step back.

It doesn't mean you have to give up or turn away from the media. You just need to be willing to admit 'This episode/throughline/season/beat sucked'.

Then you hope it gets better.

Not doing this now and then is engaging in cult behavior.

(Post that spawned this ask)

I fully agree. People liking "bad" media doesn't bother me. What gets under my skin is people defending bad media. I'm in a book club and we all own that we like books that are objectively bad. We don't defend them as good, we just like the good parts enough to drown out the bad stuff. That's normal and fine. You don't have to limit yourself to perfect and pure art if such a thing even exists. I can name flaws in most of the things I like, I just think the good far outweighs the bad.

Miraculous is not some deep and complicated show that requires you to watch every episode. The writers have flat out said it is supposed to make sense even if you miss seemingly vital episodes. This means that trying to go the deep and nuanced route to explain the flaws doesn't work. This is a show for young children. It is supposed to be easy to follow. If it's not, then it has failed at its job! Little kids have no expectations to subvert. Shows like Miraculous are supposed to teach them how stories work so they can go on and watch more complex stuff when they're older. (For us adults, shows like Miraculous are supposed to be cute escapism that lets us feel like kids again.) If no one can possibly predict where a story is going next at a high level, then it's probably a bad story.

To be clear, I don't mean that every plot beat should be obvious. It's just that the longer a story goes, the more obvious things should feel as all the little elements of the story build and come together. This allows the audience to get excited about what's going to happen next and keeps them engaged. Stories where literally anything can happen no matter how little sense it makes aren't fun because you can't get invested in anything. I'll take a predictable ending over an impossible one any day.

A perfect example is the season three final. That final was all about Gabriel winning because he knew Chloe's identity. This is spelled out in the episode and the episode setup.

Miraculer set up:

Gabriel: Chloé Bourgeois must become Queen Bee again! Nathalie: Are you still considering making her an ally? I'm afraid Ladybug has grown reluctant to giving Chloé the Bee Miraculous. She's being very careful. Gabriel: Then I will get Chloé to force Ladybug to give it to her. All I need is for her to lose all hope in Ladybug. To become angry enough so I can akumatize her. (smirks evilly)

Ladybug: I'm sorry, Chloé. I should've told you this a long time ago. I might never be able to let you be Queen Bee again. Queen Bee: What? But I did everything you asked me to. Ladybug: I know. But this is for your own safety. It's too dangerous for you and your loved ones because Hawk Moth knows that you're Queen Bee.

Final pay off:

Hawk Moth: Try it and see for yourself. You're Ladybug's greatest fan. You've helped her, you've trusted her. And what has she done for you in return? Chloé: (gets angry) Nothing! She couldn't care less about me! I'm done with her. She's irrelevant, utterly irrelevant! (reaches out to grap the Miraculous, stops) I want you to de-akumatize has my parents first! Hawk Moth: Whatever you say, my queen. (Chloé takes the comb and puts it in her hair, releasing Pollen)

Since the final also includes every other temp hero being outed this should mean that season four will go on to have Ladybug and Chat Noir starting from scratch, but is that what happens?

Nope! The mass identity reveal means nothing and everything is fine to keep going as is. Chloé's identity reveal being a problem was a one-off fluke we don't need to think about.

There is no justification for that. You can decide that you're willing to let the flaw slide and keep watching, but there is no way to make this a good choice for the story. It was the start of the secret identities holding less and less weight to the point where a lot of people no longer care about the love square reveal because it's been so incredibly cheapened. Marinette keeping her identity from Chat Noir no longer makes sense when it was once pretty reasonable.

[jave-harness]

Listen. Orteil. (imagine me sitting down like a youth pastor here) I don't normally disagree with you. I am a die-hard Cookie Clicker fan. I played NeverEnding Legacy to the fullest in spring of 2024. I got a couple thousand clicks into Nested once. But please for the love of gog keep that idea far far far far FAR away from Spore.

Let's consider EA's track record. Our closest example, Spore itself, was a cash grab. Or rather, turned into a cash grab. I do believe at one point it was an idea that had some merit (even if such is naivety). It was definitely good at one point.

But they took the vision that was had for Spore, and ruined it. And I can practically 100% guarantee that they would've done that for whatever idea you have for having five different fucking games for one continuous story.

Not to mention, who knows where which game is released. They probably wouldn't allow porting saves across multiple devices or services. Say they released the games on CD from, uhh, 2008-2011. 2013 if I'm being generous. Porting that to other game services like Steam or Origin (or the modern EA App) would've been absolutely disastrous. Linking your EA account to the Steam port is already the personal hell of the average Spore enjoyer. I don't know about the EA App, though, since I've only ever used the Steam port. Nevertheless...

I assume you say this because you wanted to skip the tribal stage specifically. Don't worry. Everybody has that feeling. But I would say allowing the player to skip any stage removes the vital linearity of the full game. You can't just go from being a creature to being the main designer of multiple cities, including the military leader of all of them as well. The tribal stage acts as a valley to understand the click-to-task, arrange buildings, war prep, and gift giving mechanics of the civilization stage while also being fun on its own (IMHO).

My personal proposition is to give up on all other stages entirely and just give us a fucking space game. The space stage takes up like 90% of the gameplay and is (")objectively(") better than all of them because it gives actual character to the creatures (which gives potential to be expanded on in Galactic Adventures and I would daresay widens the audience a little because when I was like 7 and playing Spore I loved being mean to the other empires). Plus, if they just focused on the space stage (what the game was actually about), the game just would've been better because they would've had more time and budget to work on something people might actually like.

Anyway. Crazy ramble over. Apologies. I just get so passionate about this subjects. Do not come near my Spore-kitten again.

Spore shouldn't have been 1 game with 5 different gameplay segments it should've been 5 separate games that each let you load your save from the previous one.

[songsofadelaide]

"And now I'm running with my dress unbuttoned, screaming 'But Daddy I love him!'. I'm having his baby— No, I'm not, but you should see your faces. I'm telling him to floor it through the fences... No, I'm not coming to my senses. I know he's crazy but he's the one I want."

Continuation of this piece.

Growing up with a supermodel mother meant it was only a matter of time before he was thrust into the spotlight as well. Satoru knew that much from the moment he was able to think for himself. He wasn't the daughter his mother pined for, but she loved him so, so much because he was just as pretty as she always hoped for. She only stopped working a short while after giving birth before launching herself head-on to more and more modelling gigs until her previous natural rhythm returned.

And when his mother started bringing him along to her stints like a little pet puppy to be fawned over, he learned to weaponize his pretty blue eyes so similar to hers and won the hearts of the photography crew— all just by playfully batting his feathery lashes at them.

Sometimes he regrets playing into his mother's hands like that, but like any other kid who loved seeing their mother happy, he easily agreed to every simple gig she booked for him. It started small at first— posing with her for magazine photoshoots until they became full-blown endorsements for kids' milk, toys, children's clothes... and eventually, the runway, too. Articles have been written about him even before he had a better grasp at reading, hailing him as the son of modelling royalty.

Sometimes he dreamed of a more normal life for himself. A life where his mother retired from modelling early and married into a quiet family. Her best friend did just that exactly and was completely happy with her life at present...

But no, his mother married into a wealthy family of old money and thought it was only fitting since she was a well-sought-after treasure. How narcissistic, Satoru can't help but think to himself at times. For someone whose only redeeming factor was her physical appearance— which declined in age— his mother was incredibly self-absorbed. Sometimes he wonders if he will grow up to be just like her.

He hopes not.

Because there were nights he and his mother were simply normal people, not supermodels on top of the world. She was just his mother, not supermodel Arisu Gojo. On those nights, his mother was allowed a bit more sweet wine than what was usually allowed. On those nights, he was just a kid playing house with the child of his mother's best friend in the entire world. On those nights, there was you, his only friend outside the modelling world and entertainment industry, and you were his favorite, too, just like how his mother adored yours.

Oh, Satoru adored you, all right. He realized as he grew older that he was incredibly similar to his mother in terms of being spoiled rotten. He grew into his image as the nation's sweetheart, an affable public figure who charmed everyone he encountered, but reared a whole other person whenever his family had its regular wine and dines with yours. He would march into your room like it was the most natural thing and demand you drop whatever it was you were doing because Satoru the star was in the house(!).

And surprisingly, you agreed with everything he said because you liked him just as much. Just as you were his favorite friend, he was yours.

You somewhat felt sorry for him since he didn't have the conventional childhood like you did, but seeing him having the time of his life on print ads and TV commercials, you thought he had fun on his own terms, too. At school, you would hear your female classmates gush at how perfect the nation's sweetheart was, and it instilled in you a sick sense of twisted pride at knowing him personally— who he was behind the glamorous scenes— and how terribly spoiled he was by your family.

When your classmates at school once asked what you thought about him, you played it cool by saying, "He's okay, I guess..." Only for that "okay" guy to be in your bedroom that very night asking for head pats because "the photoshoots are turning into a real drag!".

Your classmates didn't have to know the whole thing.

As you two grew older, the time you spent together grew less and less. Words even fewer. Until it all came to a head when you turned sixteen and Satoru pushed you away so hard that you held back tears. He didn't know what came over him back then, but he stopped coming over to your room afterwards. You figured he had already outgrown the setup. You two were teenagers now, for pity's sake. You would've accepted that as fact if he spoke about it, but his vanishing act left you perplexed.

Only he didn't vanish. He was everywhere— on the cover of popular teen magazines, that soda commercial on TV, fronting promotional material for high-end clothing and expensive mobile phones on social media... He's the son of modelling royalty, after all. For the last three years, he accepted project after project after project and still went on those shared family dinners like nothing happened between you two.

But there was something. He knew his old man meant well when he spoke about propriety between the two of you, but he didn't just like you as a friend at this point. Those dinners weren't complete for him without seeing your face, regardless of whether or not you hated him for leaving you so puzzled. So when you stopped showing up or heading down later than usual, he knew he had to do something.

"...ask Toru to call her downstairs! I haven't seen that girl for quite some time now! Has she been..."

"...with university lately. There's this boy, too. Her classmate, I think..."

The older women's conversation faded in his head the moment your mother mentioned a boy— a classmate— and just how close the two of you have grown while you were in university. Good grief. He couldn't handle it. He couldn't.

You were supposed to be his.

He made his way to your room upstairs, ready to speak about how the last three years were torment— About how his father's bullshit called him out because it was clear to the old man that his son looked at his friend differently now—

Then he heard them. The faintest of whimpers from your bedroom. And if he was right in his head, his name left your lips, too.

He wasn't going to let go of this.

You opened your bedroom door with your face still flushed and your clothes all rumpled, and you nearly shut him out in panic if he didn't wedge his foot in your door. "Wait a moment. I've been meaning to talk to you about something."

He stepped in, only because you allowed him to, and the sound of your door locking behind you was muted as you busily smoothed out your clothes.

"What do you want to talk about, Satoru?"

Ouch. You used to call him Toru with the sweetest voice. The way you said his name now made his heart clench uncomfortably, almost like it physically hurt him.

"I missed you."

???

"The hell are you saying? After... after that... Are you serious right now? You ignored me for the last three years and come back with that?" You raised your voice at him, but only enough for the two of you to hear. "You can't come back here and tell me you missed me because the last time you were here, you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me. Friends don't leave friends wondering... what the hell did I ever do to you?"

"For the record, I don't see you as a friend," he stated point-blank, holding your gaze with the intensity of a lightning bolt that struck a pole of electricity, setting everything around it on fire. "I mean... You always were, but I think I've made it clear lots of times that I see you as more."

More than a friend? Were you hearing him right? Satoru— Ridiculously handsome, gorgeous, stunning— the nation's sweetheart and every girl's object of affection— saw you as more than a friend?

Here he was standing before you, six feet of good-looking, silvery hair and feather-like lashes, fumbling for words and grasping for an apology to give that's far too late, but maybe it arrived just on time for you. You never hated him, anyway. How could you?

When you yearned for him just as much.

"I'm sorry. I was so scared that it would be the last, so I just... I don't know. My reasons are shit. But that was my mistake, especially when you started pulling away from me. I—"

"If you're really sorry..." You said as you took a bold step toward him, obviously catching him off guard as you closed the distance between you. "Then prove it."

You're going to take what's yours. Without so much of an effort, too, by the way he willingly opened his arms to receive you the moment you walked right in.

Needless to say, Satoru breaks the internet by posting a sweet photo with his non-showbiz girlfriend.

His fans lose their shit the moment it was posted, everyone trying to verify its veracity and authenticity. His agency and PR team wrestled to regain control of his favorite social media account, where he's posted photo after photo with you, one of which was captioned, "Since '06.". The internet sleuths attempt to trough through the mystery of your identity and where the hell you came from after all these years. Articles were written about your relationship, the speculations about your identity ranging from realistic to outright stupid.

Analysis videos were discussing his behavior around his fellow models, which started circulating on the internet, detailed how he always kept an acceptable and respectful distance from them. They all concluded that it was because of his unknown girlfriend.

Your university classmates were equally baffled that your unassuming person had that kind of relationship with the nation's sweetheart, but that was all. You were immune to the occasional murmured assumption about who you were and didn't really care what they thought. Many of them just wanted to get their degree and get things done and you agreed with that, too.

For Satoru, the cherry on top was his mother posting on her social media account, doubling down on his decision to publicize his relationship, which she excitedly and readily accepted because she loved you as her own, too. She posted an old photograph featuring her holding her then three-year-old son peering into the crib of a baby girl— and in that photograph was a face familiar to many of his mother's fans.

Your mother had a pretty good following in her youth, too, but when she chose the quiet life, she left all of it behind— and when you asked her about it, she said she did what she wanted and she wouldn't change a thing— imploring you to do the same thing, too.

"Oh, so you think the world is a much better place with me in it?" Satoru asked you teasingly, head on your lap as he absentmindedly scrolled through his social media.

"I think you should shut up," you retorted, tugging at his hair ever so slightly. "Your fans still haven't forgiven you, you know."

"The real ones will know that you make me happy. Let the fake ones can keep on barking," he shrugged at your statement. "And the real ones know by now that you were always meant to be in my world."

"Because Aunt Arisu begged my mother to give you a playmate," you chuckled at his statement. "So much for playmates."

"What? Isn't this better?"

You smiled to yourself, humming as you ran your fingers through his hair, like time was never lost to you two.

Yes. Yes, it is.

[jagiellonczyk]

Disclaimer: Please don't take this as a serious theory. I'm just having fun guessing what the next Severance episode title could indicate while being aware that I'm most likely wrong as Severance tends to surprise us with every new episode.

The next episode is called "Sweet Vitriol," also known as diethyl ether. In the 19th century, it was used as a recreational drug at organized parties called "ether frolics" (doesn't that word ring a bell? It's one of the tempers, and it's also Drummond's tattoo.). You could inhale it or drink it. During these gatherings, people often experienced minor injuries but did not feel pain; therefore, they did not react when something painful happened. Because of this discovery, ether became a common anaesthetic. But not only that, it was also used to cope with life's various challenges, both mundane and difficult (example).

Do you know who was born in the 19th century? Kier Eagan.

Do you remember where he worked? An ether factory.

Look, I don't know if Kier himself was addicted to ether, but he did say he had a "twin brother" who was presented to us as a symbol of hedonism. What was his name? Dieter. It kinda sounds like diethyl ether, doesn't it?

Kier also served as a military doctor in his twenties, and that's when he got the idea of creating and selling his own medical salves. If Kier founded Lumon in 1865, that means he treated soldiers during the American Civil War, in which anaesthesia played an important role as it was something new at that time. I am not saying he did, but he definitely could have experimented on those soldiers in some way.

And then I found this interesting quote by Hunter S. Thompson:

This is the main advantage of ether: it makes you behave like the village drunkard in some early Irish novel... total loss of all basic motor skills: Blurred vision, no balance, numb tongue - severance of all connection between the body and the brain. Which is interesting, because the brain continues to function more or less normally... you can actually watch yourself behaving in the terrible way, but you can't control it.

But what if you could control it? What if one could perform actions without experiencing pain or retaining any memory of those actions? Wouldn't it be convenient to visit the dentist without any recollection of the appointment? What if you could fly, despite your fear of airplanes? What if you could cope with life's various challenges with ease? Imagine a microchip enabling this... sounds good? Well, given the technological limitations of that era, Kier would have to leave this mission to his children...

Please take this with a grain of salt. I went down a rabbit hole and thought I'd share my thoughts. It's possible that none of it is accurate.

[fadelbison]

Now that you mentioned it please the first thing I thought when I saw First as Kant was that they would push him into a straight series especially with him previously being in multiple het shows. I at least saw 2 reactors thinking c4c was het show before khao was introduced. But First with all his new antics is definitely helping their cp to become more popular too especially in the thai side. They are both good actors and they have pretty good role selection and already having a stable fandom would do them wonders in the industry

I would say even three years ago pushing First into straight roles when he looks like this:

was not only going to be GMMs playbook but also their moral imperative. Because this was the pipeline they shoved every BL actor that could into. Gain a following using BL get funneled into straight shows now to get legitimacy as an actor. Three years ago, if First wasn't being shoved into this pipeline I'd say something was very very wrong the way it clearly was with Earth.

And well everything is in flux isn't it? GMMTV 2025 is an unprecedentedly queer roster for GMMTV in addition to a sharp increase in shows now marketed towards young working adults rather than youth. That pipeline no longer even makes sense for them.

GMMTV now has a whole roster of well established actors which I don't think they really thought was going to happen for them back in 2016 when SOTUS was released 😅 and especially not when Singto peaced out then did a bunch of critically acclaimed shows as though to highlight how vapid the creative direction within GMMTV was.

They've also made a great many missteps with branded pairings. The GMMTV three pillars (or four wtv your world view is) was a hot mess. TayNew couldn't hack it, Singto left, Krist vehemently doing straight shows to not let the CP thing give him a mental breakdown (again) and Bright and Win were mA they certainly were, weren't they? These pillars stayed pillars I think through the sheer willpower of Offgun Fun Night and Jennie Panhan's unparalleled ability to pretend nothing is amiss 🤣

GMMTV appears to be trying to hone in more and more on what makes their actors already popular rather than box them into things and make costly mistakes like they even recently did with OhmNanon and PerthChimon where they let Chimon take all that pressure of being Perth's new beau without ever considering the fact that Chimon had 0 interests in playing The Woman.

They've seemed to have taken all pressure off their actors in 2025 and I am curious to see if that trend will continue. Nanon wants a straight script? We squeeze one out for him. SkyNani undecided on being a CP? Great they get to play dark soulmates which good for them giving skynani a parameter to work with that can go from literally barely just gay to just so gay depending on the weather conditions.

C4C is going to strengthen FKs Japanese fanbase for sure, while I am assuming they are expecting the western one to remain largely unaffected. The Thai market I don't understand. First can sure as hell pass as straight now but so could Force and Book the last however many years and delightfully neither of them has given a rats ass about it, even when Bright and Win left, the straight BL boy niche once vacated was actually never filled.

In fact, the pillars are now back and supremely active but they are just extremely gay about it. Somehow TayNew were like this is going to be on our terms and their terms were a romance coded bromance and a polycule with off gun, Krist who everyone believed would NOT enjoy fanservice now has more boyfriends than ever before. I love that gay people can't be normal about anything.

There's a straight passing BL actor vacuum in GMMTV sure - does skynani not convince you that the market LOVES this genre of BL actor? And it's coincided with a point where GMMTVs artistic direction is in fact moving towards slightly older audiences. Suddenly, everything that made First second fiddle in the het shows of his youth, sets him apart as a lead NOW: he's a sweet and goofy guy aka The Ideal Husband.

I am just really curious to see over this next year whether First will make any attempts to fill the straight BL actor niche and how desperately (sponsor money) GMM will try to make him do so. The 70: 30 split agreement between FK was specifically designed to deal with this scenario, I am locked and loaded to see it finally tested.

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Gosh looks like today needs more Kakashi positivity

Kakashi's first lesson to his students is 'fuck the rules if your friends are in danger/need your help

Kakashi actively wins multiple fights on his own and even holds his own against Kakuzu and Hidan without using the MS. Cannonly (Manga only) Kakashi wins against Zabuza (twice), the seven deadly swordsmen, multiple enemies in the war arc. Kakashi is also portrayed as more of a leader than a direct fighter, excelling most when he can lead a team to victory (like in the Kaguya fight).

Obito's eye is a GIFT to him. It doesn't matter if he 'shouldn't have it' or any other reason people come up with for him being crap for using it. He is the only character we see with a Sharingan (that is none Uchiha or even Uchiha in the vast majority of cases) who was 100% gifted the eye and told to use it. He uses it to honor the memory of a friend he lost.

Kakashi is the only character we see actively stand up to the system from inside the system. He's the one who stands up to Danzo to save Yamato. He's the one who turns his back on the 'New Hokage' (Danzo) and takes Naruto out of the village during a time when ALL shinobi are supposed to be restricted to inside of the village. He's the one who ignores Hiruzen's order's and plan in order to go save Yamato. He turns his back on Tsunade giving him an S-Ranked missiong to go after two of his students.

Kakashi taught each of his students something in the short amount of time we actually got to see him in teaching mode. He helps Sasuke improve his taijutsu so much that Gai is impressed by his improvements in the short span of a month. He teaches Sasuke his Chidori. He teaches Sakura the Qi release. He teaches Naruto how to make use of his shadow clones to learn faster (something Naruto uses both to create his rasenshuriken in such a short span of time and which he again uses later to learn sage mode.). That's not even touching on the obvious moments of teaching them about teamwork and chakra control (with the tree climbing)

Kakashi cared about all of his students. When he saw Itachi he assumed he was there for Sasuke, and when he found out he was there for Naruto he was just as ready to fight to protect his students. He carries Naruto on his back after he exhausted himself and gives Naruto a head pat. Seeing a bit of himself in Sasuke does not mean he ignored any of his students. While other teachers were hyper-focused on one student, Kakashi at least recognized he was only one person and when he needed to hyper-focus on Sasuke he still made sure that Naruto had someone to train him in chakra control as that was his weakest point.

Kakashi is the Hokage that made genuine changes to the system. He's the one who made a no-kill order for the shinobi of Konoha. He's the one who redirected Konoha's system away from shinobi toward a more economic system. It was during his reign that Konoha became an economic giant and grew exponentially in size.

Kakashi also became stronger after losing the Sharingan. The Sharingan was a gift from Obito that directly hurt him because he didn't have any magical fixes to keep him from getting chakra exhausted. the chakra was constantly being drained from him by the Sharingan, making him chronically fatigued just by existing with Obito's gift.

Kakashi's purple lightning is a stronger move than his chidori and does not require the sharingan. He's also capable of turning pieces of his mud wall jutsu to glass to deflect electricity before returning it to mud so that it is not left as an extremely fragile material that would shatter under most other attacks. this is a feat that was thought to be impossible even by the person who originally suggested it.

His chakra pool is so much bigger that he held a mud wall for three days and released it when he was ready to go on the attack

he defeated 50 jonin rank missing nin shinobi with a frying pan and some really well-used genjutsu

he's always learning and growing. Kakashi in OG Naruto was one of Konoha's strongest ninja and he STILL trained to get stronger after Naruto left because he knew he needed to. The same Kakashi who made the mistake of looking directly into Itachi's eye in their first fight then turned around and tricked Itachi into wasting a MS move on a shadow clone.

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

The world if people stopped applying their understanding of "conservatism" and "religion/christianity" through a very modern, deeply American view onto Death Note (a manga from the Early-mid 2000s which is very much set in the cultural and societal context of early-mid 2000s Japan and all that entails):

[kitnita]

jason robertson postgame   —   DAL vs CHI   —  12.29.24

[how do you feel about your individual game lately? seems like you might’ve been trending in the right direction — how do you feel like you’ve been playing recently?] yeah, i think, um … i mean, i think december’s been trending in the right way. um, definitely feeling better, feeling better. um — thirty-five games in … you wanna try to get on a roll here. and what’s exciting is we have a whole new year coming soon, so. um, yeah, i can move on and try to build off of it and get excited for the new year.  [what’s the process been like coming back from the surgery? it’s something you’ve never had to do before, right?] yeah, i mean (brief unintelligible mumble) it’s been, you know, five — i don’t know, five months since the surgery, so, it’s been a long time, but, i mean (shrugs) still, without an off-season it’s definitely (laughs) definitely — still, you still don’t feel great without an off-season, and trying to adapt, and then you’re trying to play catch-up, and then you’re trying to forget about the catching up, and try to focus on a new page, so — i’m happy that december’s been trending in the right direction, and i’ll try to turn the page going into the new year.

[the-haven-keepers-collective]

My first attempt at writing that's vaguely like poetry: from a dragon

I am not what you think.

I walk around, awkward limbs and flighty mannerisms, and you think I’m strange. You have no idea how strange you would think I am if you only saw what was underneath.

Underneath, I am a creature of the ocean. Something that could never pass as human, and no longer wants to. Saltwater rushes through my veins in secret, silent to everyone but me. To me, it’s a roaring sound of the waves that I have never seen except for within my soul. It yearns to dissolve into the ocean like it could long ago, but for now those days are over and I am hidden underneath skin and muscle.

Underneath, there are wings; fins; antlers. They ache to tear from my back, through my skull. Nonetheless, they stay hidden for me, safe in the silence. Protected like I protected my kin in a lifetime so close to the surface and yet unreachable. Wrapped in a form that no longer coils around them like a serpent, but keeps them hidden from predators well enough I suppose.

I suppose.

I accept my form reluctantly and do what I can to make it mine. I shape it to feel better when I discover my gender, and when I can’t shape it to fit my true self I cover it in things that feel a little more like home. A little more draconic. A little more like the ocean that I never have seen, but feel homesick for anyway.

I do find joy in being in this body, at least. Out there, there are others. Angels working minimum wage, dragons sitting on a park bench, wolves buying groceries. We hide, but we do so to be free. We walk through crowds, and no one notices our scales and fur and feathers. But we do. We see each other, even if from miles away, and we see what’s underneath.

And underneath, none of us are what you think.

(Tags for side commentary/context)

[spotaus]

Hello guys! Today I'm posting a super self-indulgent lil drabble based on @ancientschampionau 's RealAge AU! (This is non-canon!! Just a silly concept!!)

This is 90% just me playing around with the idea of the boys story from the perspective of a random monster who lives in town! Light is a flame elemental who runs a small garden of their own, but mostly works for Grillby in his restaurant. They don't know nearly *half* of the gang's story, but they're fascinated by what they do learn over the course of a few weeks.

Uhhh. No proof-reading or anything here since it's just me being silly- Thank you Ancients for not minding me butting my grubby lil hands in and doin a goofy with it!

...

   The day wasn't too busy. At least, it was never too busy in town, but sometimes it got busy in the little restaurant that they called their home away from home. Grillby's was the go-to spot for everyone in town, and some nights they'd have to bring out extra chairs just to seat everyone. Those nights were always the most charming, hearing all the familiar voices of their neighbors rise and fall like waves as they recounted their weeks.

   Of course, Light liked unbusy nights just like this one too. Nights when they only had a few customers getting a drink or a late-night snack before they went home and hit the hay.

   Right now there were just a few regulars who Light recognized. A bird monster, and a dog specifically were sat not far from them on the otherside of the counter. Light was awful with names, but knew that these two were here every night. ...And they knew the two always had some sort of drama they were eager to share. Grillby was less inclined to let them spread rumors in his earshot, but Light was always curious and willing to humor them.

   "Ladies!" Light greeted the pair as they sidled up to the space before them, only the counter separating them. "How're you two doing tonight?"

   Both monsters looked up at the excitable greeting, and they both seemed to perk up a bit at Light's presence.

   "Oh, we're doing just swell, dear." The dog monster replied eagerly, her smile growing a bit. Light didn't miss how their flames reflected and highlighted the Grey that was growing around her muzzle. "We were worried we'd be stuck with your spoil-sport boss all night!" She teased then.

   Light knew everyone was fond of Grillby. He was just likable like that. So when the bird laughed a bit, Light joined in.

   "Hardly! Couldn't imagine a nice night like this without a good chance to hear the tea." Light assured them, which made them perk up even a bit more, "What do you have for me tonight?"

   The ladies looked between eachother, before the bird monster made a little sing-songy whistle. It drew Light's full attention.

   "We have a few newcomers to town!" She chimed, and the dog monster nodded her head in agreement. "They're staying with Sans at the moment. At least, that's what my son says he overheard!" She added. "That boy overheard a phone-call that nice Papyrus boy took from his brother, and it sounded sudden!" She sounded proud.

   Light had to admit, they were surprised. Normally the ladies would tell them of a new batch of sheep brought in or a baby foal being born. On the more exciting days it'd be a scandal having to do with some young strapping man coming to town, but often that just ended up being the plot of a movie they'd watched that day.

   Hearing names, though? Sans and Papyrus lived a little ways away, but Light knew of them. Hell, everyone in town knew them. The ladies had never tried to make a fake story about them, and Light was interested. New people staying in town with the brothers? Light had moved in from the city a few years back and they remembered being lucky they knew people here. If these newcomers were real, they were lucky to have the brothers to watch out for them.

   "New folks you say? Have they been into town at all?" They asked curiously.

   The two ladies shook their heads a bit, "No. Sounded like they just moved a few days ago." The bird monster answered.

   The dog monster leaned forward, "I heard from the grocery that Sans was definitely buying a few extra things, though. Seems like they'll be staying a while." She deduced.

   Light wasn't quite sure how right the ladies were, and they could tell they were going to try and dive into a guessing game that would most likely end up more insulting than insightful, so Light laughed a bit.

   "Well, we'll just have to do our best to make them feel at home, right ladies?" They insisted a bit pointedly, and recieved nods of agreement that Light hoped were genuine.

 

   They sighed, glancing around, already losing their focus as the women started thinking of exactly how many visitors there were, how they knew Sans, why they'd moved. The whole nine yards. And, admittedly, they too were curious. Light imagined they were probably just old friends stopping by to see the town before they headed on their way again.

   It felt like hardly a minute had passed when they felt a hand pat their shoulder. It jolted them from their thoughts, and they realized that Grillby was back. They didn't need him to say anything to know it was getting close to closing time, and they scurried back towards the kitchen so they could start cleaning up for the night. And among their chores, the thoughts of newcomers in town faded, overlapped by just how many dishes they had piled up.... curse their laziness.

.

.

.

   It'd been a month or two since the ladies in the restaurant had brought up Sans' new house-mates. At first Light had been sure they were temporary, but the assumptions of them staying seemed to be true. Light had heard just about every update on them directly from the ladies, anytime Grillby gave them the chance to ask.

   Apparently it was five new skeleton monsters, all of them staying with Sans. Or, Crop. They were calling him Crop now, something about skeleton naming conventions. Four of them were adult guys, and from what Light had been told, they were a bit imposing. The fifth, though? A babybones. From what they'd heard, it was a little boy that the four adults had showed up with. That kid seemed to be their pride and joy, and maybe even what brought them to stay with Crop.

   Light had seen a few of them out in town a few times, just in passing. The one with the hole in his skull was the first one they'd spotted out in the wild, helping Crop with errands. Then there was the one with the dark magic leaking from his sockets. His soul being on display was a bold choice, but Light hadn't had much time to oogle him, as he'd just been walking out of the market as Light was walking in.

   They heard a rumor about the one that always seemed serious, a red scar under one of his sockets, but Light hadn't had the opportunity to spot him yet, and they'd seen the babybones across the street once, tucked in the arms of the one who always seemed to wear a hood.

   Light really didn't like to pry into people's private lives, but there was just so much talk swirling around that it was hard to not get at least a hint of new news daily. Like, when they were shopping for a new shirt (they ripped their old one trying to climb up a tree and grab a piece of their laundry that had escaped the drying rack) they heard the shop-owner talking about how adorable the new little family in town was to the person in-line before them. When they were hanging out with some pals, their buddy said the hooded one had fixed his janky-ass cash register in just a few minutes. That thing had been broken longer than Light was in-town! And just lately they'd heard that Gerson was giving all of them high-praises.

   Of course, it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. No one knew where they came from, and they didn't tell either. Some people were weary, monsters with injuries like those? With the tired looks on their faces when they weren't really thinking about it? Monsters like that surely spelled trouble... but Light wasn't there to judge. They felt like an outside observer just piecing things together haphazardly as new information was thrown their way.

   ...and then they broke their lights.

   Okay, in their defense it wasn't actually the lights themselves. Something in the wiring had fucked up while they were at work, and they came back to a pitch-black farmhouse and a shitty housemate who'd scared the hell out of them by jumping out from under the table as they passed by.

  

   N, their awful (or Funny, as she'd put it) housemate had apparently gotten back from her own work and found the house like that, and she'd changed out all the lightbulbs before sunset. But, they didn't keep matches. Or lanterns, really. And she didn't know where to find the flashlight or her phone in the pitch black, so she'd decided waiting in the dark for her walking-torch of a friend to return was the best plan.

   And, apparently, N had somewhere to be in the morning, but she'd already phoned in an electrician to come figure out where things had gone wrong and fix it by the time Light was awake to find the note she'd left about it. Joyous day, Light loved those electricians. Not.

.

   One dreamless sleep and a tired morning. Light was in the kitchen, dressed in their work uniform and tiredly shoving a piece of fresh cantaloupe in their mouth, when their door knocker banged against the wood of the front door.

   Weird, the electricians always dragged their feet. One glance at their phone revealed that this one was only a few minutes behind schedule.

   They wandered to the door, gulping down their hasty breakfast before swinging the door open, and-

   That was not a big city electrician. That was, in fact, the new guy in town with the hood that fixed Gerson's, like, entire house. Wow. Light wasn't expecting him, N could've at least warned them!

   "Oh, good morning!" They unwittingly shifted gears, turning up their energy levels a bit, as to be welcoming. "I'm guessing my friend N called you about our electricity issue?" They questioned, holding the door open.

   It felt like they towered over the skeleton. They couldn't see his eyelights from under his hood, but he seemed tired and slouched. Unenthused to be here at the very least, and at the most he seemed deeply offended by having to stand on Light's rickety old porch. His vibe check was not passing.

   "Mm, yeah. Something about the wiring." He confirmed, seemingly begrudgingly. His voice was a little... quiet? That could've just been Light, though. They were used to the loud hollers of country-folk these days.

   Light sighed in exasperation. "Yep! I'm sure she probably told you all about it, but the entire lighting set-up went dark yesterday while we were both at work." They agreed, stepping to move out of the entrance to their house, "Come on in, I'm sure you'll know better than either of us did."

   The guy slipped in past them with a slight hum of confirmation, and Light noticed the toolbox clutched in one of his hands.

   They trailed him after closing the door, and watched as he honed in on the nearest light-switch. Unsurprisingly he toggled it, clicking the switch on. Off. On. Off again.

   Something felt a bit surreal. Light was convinced this guy and the other folks Crop was hosting were something like a urban legend, or a celebrity. They'd never been so close to them, and maybe it was a bit silly of them that they'd thought the guys were so imposing. I mean, this guy was in their house, and in just a few minutes he reminded Light more of a wet cat than anything the rumors about him or his friends had conjured up.

   He seemed tired, and he did everything with this off-putting systematicness. He'd seemed fine with Light trailing him through the house, pointing out where the wiring went and connected and which switches did what. It'd just given them more of a chance to observe him.

  

   In hindsight that was a little weird, but Light wasn't exactly the most normal monster in the world, so whatever.

   But truly. This guy seemed small, and a bit thin compared to the others they'd seen from afar. He was ultra quiet, probably the quietest person in town, and even though Light never saw his eyelights, it constantly felt like they were the one being scrutinized, and not the other way around.

   And, just like that, the skeleton had hummed and begun unscrewing a lightswitch plate just outside of N's room. Light watched curiously as he peeled the old cover back from the switch, and he poked at something with a nod to himself.

   "The wires here are frayed, messed up the circuit." He voiced, and his words made Light jump a bit. The only sound for at least 15 minutes had been their steps and the crackling of Light's flames.

   "Oh, seriously?" They asked meekly, seeing as he was already pulling some stuff out of his tool kit. Wires, it looked like. Maybe electrical tape too?

   "Yeah. Rat probably chewed through it." Was all he responded with, and Light was once again left in that silent gap as they watched him work. And he was skilled, that was for sure. Light had half expected him to dismiss them so he could fuck around for an hour to waste their time like the city electricians used to, but in about 5 minutes flat he had the wires attached, and in a few more minutes the cover was screwed back in place.

   A simple flick of the switch had the hall lights on in a split second. The shadow that fell on his skull darkened, but Light was too busy being impressed by his handiwork.

   "Holy shit, they don't even flicker anymore!" They said in mild amazement, missing as the skeleton packed his supplies back up and seemed already prepared to go.

   He led the charge back to the door, double-checking each light as they went, but they all worked better than ever now.

  

   "Here, your pay!" Light suddenly broke their silence, digging into their pocket before producing a roll of cash that N had left behind. "Thank you for the help, man." They added, though they swallowed their need to offer him a cup of coffee or a quick snack. It seemed to them he wasn't compelled by the need for a classic southern-farewell.

   He plucked the cash from theur hand, slipping it into a pocket on just jacket with a mumbled 'No problem.' before he was already on his way back out the door.

   Thirty minutes or so, that was really all it had taken. He was like a spectre, in and out in near complete silence. Not abrasive, but not friendly... cautious? Yeah. In hindsight he did seem cautious.

   Light decided in that moment that they'd be asking Grillby to give that man and his friends a discount the next time they stopped in.

.

.

.

   They were really moving into Gerson's old farm. Light hadn't seen that one coming in the slightest, but when Dani had driven past them with a load of lumber in her truck, with another few following her, Light had realized they were heavily out of the loop.

   Luckily for them, their boss knew what was going on already, and he was already telling them before they got two steps in the door with the latest crate of their supplies.

   "A delivery?" Light questioned the fire monster as he heated the crate out of Light's grasp. Light was young and spry, but Grillby was miraculously strong.

   They eyed him curiously, eyes skimming his flames, listening to the crackling pops that danced away from him. Was he really...?

   "Gerson's old place? Those guys really moved in there?" They questioned, though they knew that Grillby wasn't one for gossip. He was dead serious when he said he needed them to run an order out to the place.

   Apparently, Ellie had insisted Grillby contribute to their little gathering, celebrating the new neighbors and helping them settle in for good. Of course, he'd obliged, but he didn't want to leave the restaurant unattended for too long. So, Light would be taking the orders that way instead.

   "Alright, okay!" They laughed a bit as Grillby nudged them using the crate in his arms. All the supplies were stacked out back, and it seemed all the food was ready in the kitchen.

   Light gathered the food carefully, stacking it securely in their passenger's seat as Grillby kept moving in and out of the building, each time with another load of supplies.

   And then they were off. With only a slight detour past their own place, they made it no problem to the place they were meant to be.

   ...Luckily, the crowd wasn't big, and it wasn't hard to find a place to park on the driveway. Light could see a small group gathered in front of the building, and found that a few more were already on their way back to theur trucks. The Sun wasn't quite setting, but Light hoped they hadn't taken too long.

  

   Swinging out of the driver's side, they rounded to the passengers and gathered the food along their arms... having four sure did help them with the load.

   They kicked the door of their truck shut and moved as hurriedly as they could towards a familiar bunny monster. She and her partner were the only reason they were out here.

   "Food delivery, still warm!" Light called out when they got close enough that it felt appropriate. Only once a few faces had turned did they grin and continue, "Fresh from Grillby's, he sends his regards to our new neighbors!"

   One of the few of the group that was gathered was that skeleton with the magic leaking from his eyes. Light had, once, wondered whether they were tears but had since dismissed that idea. He always wore a wicked grin whenever they crossed paths.

   It was that skeleton and Ellie who approached them, breaking off from the little group who'd seemingly been helping out. Though, Light suspected by now that it might've become a social hour as the sun kept dipping lower.

   "Huh, today is just full of pleasant surprises," the skeleton voiced as he got within rang to stop and stand before Light, "And to think this is just in time for dinner. Now Horror won't have to cook!" He... seemed to be thinking aloud.

   Ellie came up beside him, smiling at Light, "Oh I was worried that stubborn monster wouldn't send anything at all!" She voiced, "Thank you, Light, for bringing all this up here." She was already moving forward, and Light let her scoop one of the covered plates off their arm.

   "It's no trouble at all. Least I can do to return the help is ferry some food to you hard-workers." They replied easily, though they didn't miss how the skeleton was looking at them now.

   I mean, he'd been looking before, but now Light felt that same weird feeling of being watched as they had at their house. A glance revealed that the skeleton had an eyebrow quirked at them.

   "Return the help?" He questioned idly.

   Oh, right, "Yeah! Your hooded friend was a big help to me a few weeks back. Fixed up my house's entire lighting circuit in a fraction of the time the city folks usually take." They said honestly, "But, based on what I've heard I'm probably not the first one to say that." They laughed a bit.

   The skeleton seemed to relax a little. When had he even tensed? Light hadn't noticed there was any tension in his form until his shoulders slumped a bit.

   "Ohhhh, right. Geez, Dust's met half this town and doesn't tell us anything." He mused. Light just tried to file away that the hooded one was Dust. "Well, speaking of Dust, he's probably already inside with the others." He said then, tilting his head towards Ellie, "You mind fielding the rest of these guys? Meet us back inside for dinner?"

   Ellie assured this guy that she could handle it and passed off the plate she'd taken to him.

   Light wasn't exactly informed on what was happening, but the skeleton just nodded for Light to follow him, and they did.

   They passed the last few folks catching up and cleaning in the lawn before climbing some steps onto a porch. Then the skeleton swung the door open, and Light slipped in behind him easily. It felt like any other delivery to any other residents of the town. Familiar and practiced, even though they'd never even gone past the drive on this old property.

   Inside the house was a bit barren, and pretty quiet, but that serenity only lasted for a few seconds before there was a call from the skeleton who led them inside.

   "Guess who brought back the grub?" He called, recieving various voices hissing the name 'Killer' in various levels of frustration to his calling.

   Light traveled into a separate area, a kitchen/dining room it seemed, following Killer with the meal, and they suddenly understood why they had so much.

   Sat and stood in the space were the other three skeletons who'd moved in, along with Crop, Straw, and Dani. It felt like a family-reunion of sorts. The skeletons all seemed to be leveling Killer with frustrated and exasperated looks as he sauntered inside and set his one plate on the table before him.

   "Killer, you gotta be more careful, Night was trying to get in a nap." Scolded one of them quietly, the one with the red scar under his eye.

   And stood in the doorway, Light spotted exactly what he was talking about. Killer moved quick to approach the hooded skeleton, Dust, and Light initially missed what was curled up in Dust's lap. No, not what. Who.

   There, tiredly blinking up towards the approaching Killer, was the babybones. He looked so comfy tucked in Dust's arms, and Light didn't envy him when Killer leaned and gently poked at one of his cheeks. "Sorry tiny boss, but we've got dinner to eat." He seemed to quietly amend as the little guy seemed unphased by the prodding.

   Light had been a bit shell-shocked. Maybe it was the kid being so cute? Maybe it was exhaustion from a long day? Most likely it was just that they felt like a bit of an intruder on a nice family meal. Like there was an invisible wall separating them from the fondness permeating in the room.

   Of course, that wasn't the case, and their arms were still keeping a few plates Wirth of food warm as they stood idly by. Watching as the room seemed to grow warmer at the presence of the babybones reawakening.

   "Oh, Light! Should've known Grillby wouldn't come himself." They were jolted out of their thoughts by Crop. He acknowledged them, which brought a lot of eyes directly onto them. They hoped their flames didn't burn brighter in embarrassment.

   They took a few steps inside, which brought them to just before an open seat at the table. "Great to see you again, Crop! You know how he is anymore about leaving the place un-manned." They voiced, trying to shake the gazes they could feel digging into them as they expertly laid the plates across the dinner table, sliding a few down the way with a practiced arm. "Besides, I would've been bummed if I hadn't gotten to greet the newly-moved in folks properly!"

   They stepped back once the food was all arranged, but finally took a moment to meet the stares watching them. Killer seemed unbothered, already moving to sit. Dust would've likely been uninterested, but Light could see how the little one was staring at them. And the other two? The big one was alright. He didn't seem to mind once Crop had greeted them, but the one with the scar still seemed weary.

   "Of course, I'll get out of your guys' hair so you can eat, but I heard people were bringing gifts, and my farm's not in season right now, so I had to improvise a bit." They said with a nervous grin as they popped open their inventory. A moment later, a simple black vase settled in their hands, and the room was lit up just a bit more.

   They hadn't expected the surprised hum of surprise from one of the skeletons.

   "Are those flowers, but on fire?" He asked, and Light caught that it was the one with the scar. They hoped that meant they could woo him a bit and make things less awkward.

   "Basically!" The agreed. "Flame flowers, they're my speciality item I grow in my garden. They'll keep burning as long as you leave them in the sun and don't water them." They explained, before holding the little bundle of them out above the table. "They're non-flammable and the flames don't get hotter than an average spring day. The vase is stone too, better for them to last longer." They almost got lost in a rant about how exactly the plant worked, but reigned it in as they realized just how long they'd been talking.

   "Mm, they seem pretty neat. Thank you." Came the voice of the one with the hole in his skull. "Would ya mind setting them on the counter there?" He gestured towards the counter behind them, and as they turned to place them, they realized Dani had begun talking about something. Maybe them, even? But they'd overstayed their welcome.

   Dani or Ellie would get the plants back to them to get back to Grillby's, they knew that much.

   They passed Ellie on their way out, only exchanging quick pleasantries before they split ways. The lawn was dark now, vacant besides Light's glow against the grass abd trees, abd their truck was the last one, parked a few paces from Crop and Dani's trucks.

   They stopped by the restaurant to check in on Grillby, but he dismissed them for the night, so they simply went home. But, those guys... something about them was oddly familiar. Or, oddly unfamiliar? They couldn't place it, not with words, but all that really mattered was that they seemed to really have found a home here, just like Light had.

   The town, with its many faults and troubles, seemed to attract the strangest people to call it home. That's what it was meant for though, right? This town looked out for its own. Maybe that was why it felt so right to have those five skeletons now living up on that previously vacant plot after so long.

[fag4dykestobin]

i, like, read steddie fics, is the thing. and i like some of them even. but the only thought that gets me through my daily perusal of the steve&robin tag on ao3 is "i hope eddie munson explodes into gore and is erased from existence and everyone forgets about him forever" on repeat

[anglerflsh]

very rushed comic because I'm rotating them in my head. Adam voice "I sillified myself too close to the sun"

[eddiemunsonsmum]

Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.

*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*

No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.