#because oh my fucking god what are they planning to post next its gonna be vile

[cringefail-clown]

i often forget i follow dakidavekat on twt, so when im scrolling its always a suprise when i get hit in the eyeballs with some of the most disturbing and/or gross shit imaginable. keeps me on my toes

[vaguenotions]

Oh, yes, I just love your unannounced sleepover where you both come back from the bar after carefully avoiding telling me that's where you were going, and also neglecting to tell me when you'd be home! I definitely do not want to knock you on your ass and take a bat to your dome! That would be rude and unnecessary :)

Oh yes, please do start talking about shit amongst yourselves and make me feel isolated and othered in ny own room! These moments are what I live for, of course. Naturally. Who would ever have any issues with this arrangement at all?

[mydearesthrry]

i loveddd the musician reader blurb 🥹🥹 would loveee to see more

a/n: I LOVED WRITING IT THANK U FOR THIS ANON. enjoy my babies <3 i have an fc for musician!yn x har and its gonna be gracie abrams :p

warnings: nonesies, fluff!!

—

“hey, h?” Y/N called from her spot on the sofa, her laptop on her lap as she scrolled through the files for her next project, entitled five seconds flat.

“yeah, baby?” he shouted back, his footsteps soon following his words as he walked through their house, sitting next to Y/N when he arrived. “whats wrong?”

“um, to be honest, i- i don’t even really know. i just think something’s missing from here,” she sighed, running a hand through her hair. “like, i love it so far, but it’s missing something. i think it’s missing it’s ‘overarching love’ song. which is really stupid because this album has so many love songs.”

“not really.” he replied simply, shrugging and looking at her.

“what do you mean? there’s tons!”

“really? like what? go through the tracklist, baby.”

she rolled her eyes, mumbling a ‘fine!’, before pulling up the tracklist. “see! um, all my ghosts, what a shame? kinda?”

“exactly.” he stated, giggling at his wife.

“you’re so annoying. can you help me? please?”

he scoffs playfully, “as if i didn’t produce nearly the entire thing f’you, but sure.”

“okay, so i’m thinking of a poem that i wrote a long time ago called lame, and i wanna work on that. it was right before i told you i loved you.”

after cracking open y/n’s journal and flipping through the pages, they had finally had a song.

“fucking finally, holy shit!” she shouted, clapping as she collapsed on harry who laid sprawled on the couch.

“y’still gotta record it, m’precious wife,” he giggled. “and find a feature. since we decided that’s what we’re doing, f’some reason.”

“fuck my life,” she groaned, twisting in her spot to attach her cheek to his chest, hair fanning out around her and nearly tickling his nose. “why can’t you do it with me?”

“no.”

“harry,”

“no.”

“harry!”

“no, dude!”

“harry,” his wife stressed, holding the ‘y’. “pretty please? i’ll do that thing you like with my mouth?” she offered, knowing he wouldn’t refuse that.

“oh my god, fine! but this is the first and last collab im doing!” he grumbled exasperatedly.

“thank you, oh my god!” she squealed, running over to him and jumping, legs wrapping around his legs and her arms crossing around his neck.

“whatever. better hold up your end of the bargain.” he rolled his eyes, his hypocritical hands coming down to rest on her waist.

she grinned, jumping down from him and placing her hands on his chest. blinking up at him owlishly, she ran her hands down his torso and murmured, “i plan to, handsome. i’ll even start right now.”

———

liked by charles_leclerc, sabrinacarpenter, and 7,662,617 others

yourinstagram: took a tiny break and ended up at long pond with my beautiful producer husband <3. u have to wait to hear what we made there,,, butttt….. HATE TO BE LAME FT HARRY STYLES IS OUT NOWWWWW LOVE YOU LOVE YOU LOVE YOU

pinned yourinstagram: ps our faces when we cant figure out a chord progression 😭😭😭

comments on this post have been limited

charles_leclerc: Already streaming in the Ferrari garage!

> scuderiaferrari: charles_leclerc we can confirm 🫡

> yourinstagram: scuderiaferrari OMGGGGG MI FAMIGLIAAAAAA LOVE U

landonorris: party celebration for the surprise release when???

> yourinstagram: landonorris get podium this weekend and u can celebrate for us 🤗🤗🤗

billieeilish: crying again i love you guys

ynrrysweethearts: EEEEEK

niallhoran: Gnomeo and Juliet back and better than ever!

> harrystyles: Rude.

madisonbeer: ur literally perfect in every way goddd i miss u guys so much

> yourinstagram: madisonbeer we miss u our precious daughter

harrystyles: We’re so cute. I love us.

harrystyles: I love you times infinity. It makes sense that you’ll probably be my first and last feature. H Xxxx

> yourinstagram: first and last but a few more right 🥹🥹

daylightyn: our parents!!!!!

alexandrasaintmleux: my beautiful angel girlllll

> yourinstagram: alex my love i miss u to bits

francisca.cgomes: we miss u on the paddock sweet bby 💞

> yourinstagram: oh my god kika i miss u so much its a problem

——

liked by yourinstagram, niallhoran, and 9,266,166 others

harrystyles: HATE TO BE LAME. OUT NOW.

view all 78,189 comments

yourinstagram: 🤭🤭🤭

yourinstagram: love youuuuuuu so muchsies

> harrystyles: I love you moresies. Xx

yourinstagram: ok look at us being models

yourinstagram: am i hyping u up enough

> harrystyles: yourinstagram Yes. Fueling my ego.

yourinstagram: my precious baby angel sugar cookie muffin pie <3 <3

> harrystyles: You’re insane.

user1: MORESIES??????? WTF

user2: he just said moresies yn is influencing him too much 😭😭😭

> yourinstagram: user2 its my job!!!! 😁😁

user3: they’re both on the writing credits they prob wrote it together 😭😭😭

oscarpiastri: dad!!!!!!!!

> harrystyles: No. ❤️

user4: harry calling yn insane is so funny like hes def heard worse

user5: i love them so bad oh my god

user6: I DIDNT KNOW HARRY AND THE F1 BOYS WERE FRIENDS

> user7: yes!!! yn’s sister was a mechanic for ferrari and is now lando’s race engineer so they all get along really well!

yourinstagram: sorry im back here again WE R SO CUTEEEEEE

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

Hi was just going through the post on “hale” which was searched cause my cat is such a mediating little baby and it was a pic of stiles flirting with Derek and Scott just validating and hyping stiles up, and I wanted to know if you know or can recommend some good Scott himbo fanfics, just him being a dude bro himbo who loves stiles so much, especially with working hard to get Stiles and Derek together.

Thank you!!,! It can included as many himbo as you like!,!!!!

Yeah!

The Matchmaking Alpha (or Two Dumb Love Birds Attack) by NathTE

(1/? I 300 I Teen)

Scott was tired of seeing Stiles and Derek dancing around each other, which made it even more frustrating as he was the one both chose to come to talk about the other.

So, he decided he was going to help them realize, that their supposedly unrequited love, wasn’t that unrequited anyway.

Come Over Here And Make Me by tabbytabbytabby

(1/1 I 1,759 I Teen)

Stiles and Derek get stuck together when Scott and Mason team up and find a way to keep them trapped at Derek's. It works out better than they expected.

For the prompts: “Looks like we’re gonna be stuck here for a while.” and “Come over here and make me.”

McLinski's by StaciNadia

(1/1 I 3,075 I General)

Derek is a coffee snob looking for some good coffee, but what he finds is bad coffee jokes and maybe a whole lot more.

ones you never expected by Marishna

(1/1 I 3,832 I Mature)

A few seconds later Stiles and Derek heard the elevator start its laborious descent to the ground floor.

Stiles kept his head buried in one of the new books he picked up, scanning the passages for any keyword or phrasing that sounded similar to what their allied San Bernadino pack friends were dealing with. Finally, after three long, drawn-out minutes, Derek dropped his pen to the table and pushed back from it.

“They’re gone,” he told Stiles who stuck a piece of paper between the pages to mark his place and shut his book.

“About time! Now, strip,” he ordered.

How To Get Your Idiot Friends Together: A Four Step Process by Scott McCall by reptilianraven

(1/1 I 4,344 I General)

"He laughs at your jokes, man. How blind can you be?"

Stiles makes this face like he ate a lemon or something. "Are we talking about the same guy here? Because Derek Hale has never once laughed at my jokes."

"No, he does the thing where he exhales quickly through his nose. Like when you see something funny on the internet." Scott says and oh my god. "Stiles he thinks you're funny like how things on the internet are funny. I don't get why I have to explain this to you!"

-

In which Scott plays matchmaker because he'd probably go insane if these two idiots can't get their fucking act together.

[slide] by sonic_counselor

(1/1 I 16,506 I Mature)

He’s worked at the movie theater for just over a year now and it’s probably the best job he’s ever had, although that’s not entirely a fair comparison when the only other jobs he’s ever had involved raking leaves for Mrs. Huckabee next door and doing some filing for his dad at the station.

He’s also had a crush on Derek for just over a year, ever since his first day at the theater when their overbearing and probably certifiably insane general manager, Bobby Finstock, had declared he didn’t have time to do Stiles’ induction and had palmed him off on Derek instead because he happened to be walking past the office.

# #

Working at the movie theater alongside his crush is all getting a little too much for Stiles. It's just as well Scott, and his terrible matchmaking plans, are on hand to help out.

[sun-stricken]

Hello. I absolutely love your Fairy Tail head-canons, especially about demon slayer Gray. Feel free to take or leave these little ideas. Always love when you post <3

~

Imagine Team Natsu has to rent a vehicle or something and they require actual legal paperwork like a birth certificate and address or something like that (more than just “guild business! Gonna need this!”). Lucy doesn’t want to rent it because there is no way she’s going to be responsible for the inevitable damage. Erza, being the leader and a good friend volunteers. A few minutes later she comes back out, puzzled.

Erza: “why would they need a birth certificate? Shouldn’t me being present be proof enough of my existence?”

Gray starts snickering in the background. Natsu goes in next but comes out even earlier than Erza, cause at least Erza had a probably legal address at Fairy Hills, Natsu on the other hand lives in a house in the woods.

By the time Wendy goes in the receptionist is exasperated. “Yes I understand you are with Fairy Tail but that isn’t until page three of the paper work. None of you have made it past the first page.”

Gray finds this all very amusing.

Lucy: “Since you find it so amusing why don’t you go register, Gray!?”

Gray: mutters something

Natsu: “What do you mean you’re legally dead?!”

Cause you know, Ur just found a kid (the only survivor) and just decided to keep him. Oh, no official rescue crews didn’t show up until two days later? My kid now :)

The search and rescue teams never found any survivors in Gray’s old town so everyone was pronounced dead. The magic council or whoever is in charge of that stuff is also disorganized enough that no one realized that Gray Fullbuster is both a famous wizard and supposedly dead. So, just, Gray technically being considered legally dead the entire time he was at Fairy Tail.

~

Also, the slayers all going out on a job together(the dragon slayers had to drag Gray). The job turns out to be a trap (surprise!) and the floor just opens up revealing a giant vehicle.

Dark mage: “Ha-ha! I have bested the dragon slayer! The most powerful mages-“spots Gray just chilling, perfectly fine and not motion sick. “what are you doing?” Cause the guy was planning to capture dragon slayer, not whatever a demon slayer was (the dark mage didn’t even know demon slayers were a thing). Gray defeats the dark mage but holds it over Natsu’s head for a week.

After that anytime a large group of dragon slayers takes a job together they take Gray along for “extra security during transportation” or just extra security in general.

I also head-canon that each type of slayer magic has its own unique weakness. Dragon slayers get severely motion sick. God slayers are claustrophobic. Demon slayers cannot handle sweets. If Gray gets even a whiff of cake or any other dessert his gag reflex acts up and he gets really nauseous and other stuff like that. He of course hid it at first (he was afraid Erza would disown him) but eventually everyone learned about the weakness of demon slayers. Natsu teases him about it but never pushes it too far to the point of accidentally making Gray really sick.

Anyways, sorry for the long ask. Feel free to expand on anything. Always love some good slayer bonding head-canons and just Fairy Tail head-canons in general. <3

This was so much fun to make tbh so domt apologize, i love long asks <3 and thank for for what you said ant my posts! theyre fun to make so im glad ppl enjoy them

Oh, you have no idea how often ive though about Gray being legally dead, my personal favorite scenario is him trying to fix it and prove himself alive but cant

“How the fuck would i know my social security number??? i was eight years old! i had no reason to know!!!”

There was no dna or finger-print records of him or his family so he couldn’t prove it that way either. Apparently, declaring someone born or dead is easier than someone ‘resurrected’. To the law Gray of Isvan is dead and although Gray of Fiore bares similarities, they are two different people.

But ALSO to the law Gray of Fiore doesnt exist bc he has no birth certificate. And while hes adamant, he has no real proof beyond his word he is Gray Fullbuster of Isvan.

So basically, According to the law, Both Gray Fullbuster of Isvan and Fiore are dead and never existed, respectively.

tbh this sounds like an identity crisis waiting to happen, but what else is new with him

Erza probably tried to fix it after she was told bc she legally didnt exist for a minute either (never was filed as a real person, she was able to file for a late birth certificate on account that she wasnt claiming to be a ‘separate’ person and also Makarov did it for her) (dont ask why he didnt for Gray, i like plot holes). But quickly realized their situations were very different, him waiting over a decade to check in as a survivor with the proper authorities definitely weakened his case considering he was running around free before he decided he needed a birth certificate.

But hey, as long as he doesn’t need to rent something, or get a license or id, or work somewhere beyond Fairy Tail, or get married, or, god forbid, die again, he should be fine!

i wonder if he would be considered a ‘john doe’ if he actually died again since they have ‘no’ birth records

This also makes games like ‘two truths and a lie’ amazing

“alright so, im legally dead, i legally dont exist, and ive never physically died before” “Gray what the hell do you mean” “Guess the right one and ill tell you” “WHAT THE HELL DOES THIS MEAN THOUGH??”

i love everything to do with the ‘dragon slayers + gray’ dynamic

‘Extra security’ just turns into Gray babysitting a bunch of rambunctious dragons for hours. seriously, get this guy a reward for how he hasnt killed or maimed any of them yet.

Imagine them trying to convince Gray to walk to their destination instead of taking the train

“Its not that far!!” “its fucking 5 hours by train, How long do you think itll take to walk? Why would even you pick this job if you knew how long the ride would be??” … “nobody looked..” “are you actually serious.” … “oh my fucking god”

and thats the story of how one Demon slayer ended up having to babysit 4 very pitiful looking Fairy Tail Dragon slayers on a train. Dude had to drag them off it once it stopped too.

His side career of ‘Dragon Slayer Babysitter’ only gets harder when they realize holy shit! cold compresses can help nausea! and what do they have? a walking cold compress.

Taking a train trip with them just means second hand nausea AND embarrassment, and absolutely no personal space. A dream come true.

At least he gets to hold it over their heads

Tbh i like the irony of Dragon Slayers being motion sick because, yk, dragons can fly, so my hc for side effects for God Slayers and Demon Slayers were along the same lines

God Slayers being wide open space or flying since Gods are like the epitome of freedom? all knowing and have complete reign over everything, But claustrophobia works so much better for that same reason. It would cause extreme panic and rash decisions

And Demon Slayers was the dark because demons are supposed to be these evil creatures who thrive in the dark n stuff? basically it would send a Demon Slayer into a paranoid spiral.

But sweets being a weakness instead is such a silly thing that im gonna take it and run

Gray never cared for sweets in the first place, gave him a stomachache, but now he has to walk away from Erza mid conversation if she decides to indulge, which is almost everyday. She was absolutely heartbroken and devastated when the weakness was revealed, it was such a dramatic reaction one wouod think she was the one with the new weakness

When Gray pokes fun at Natsus motion sickness he’ll go on about how Gray is gonna have the lamest parties since he cant handle even the smell of sweets, especially cake.

A terrible realization for everyone involved with him, on par with when Gray realized he wouldnt be able to have ice cream comfortably again, thats like a staple for ice mages

heart wrenching, truly

[memberment]

GOOD MORNING EVERYONE

So the Trinitarians brain worm is back and Morning Glory is now longer and biting the dust as far as my focus goes.

But like, I genuinely want to talk to anyone who's invested in what's to come as far as part two goes. SO PLEASE. I IMPLORE THE FOUR OF YOU WHO PERPETUALLY TAKE NOTICE OF MY SCREAMS INTO THE VOID.

We're all aware that Trin is a time loop fic. That is confirmed.

BUT THE PROBLEM IS HOW I'M GOING ABOUT DOING THAT. AND I NEED INPUT FROM PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT ME AS FAR AS PLEASES AND SPARKLES GO, YES?

Because like sure I'm writing it and like fuck everything else, let me tell my story. But it's the how of it all like if I'm gonna throw another 200 give or take hours into this I would at least like one person to be having a wonderful time drinking and driving (I have since remembered this is not a common phrase, I do not mean this in a literal sense, it's an expression) with me right?

Part two is going to be 50 chapters, give or take. (Part one is about 37 for reference.)

So the plan for part 2 rn is (ROGUHLY):

(1-10) is the second timeline. There are a lot of importants and I cannot just glaze over it all more than that. But we're also working in a bit of a shorter time period than the original events of the story and introductions do not need to happen again, right?

(11-40)ish would be me running through the next timelines in a set up structure -> what changes -> the results of said changes and then inevitably what sends our looper backwards. It wouldn't be running through all the timelines but the more notable ones in kind of a four chapter structure, I am not fully sold on four, but rough estimate yk.

And then 41-50 would be the finale of part two. It's literally the last timeline in its glory and then the epilogue which kicks off part three.

COULD AT LEAST ONE OF Y'ALL SIT THROUGH THAT OR DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY NOTES AT ALL BECAUSE LIKE

I personally kinda like it but if not a soul is reading this I am throwing myself on the curb with the rest of the garbage LMFAOOO.

I NEED THOUGHTS. OPINIONS. COMMENTS. CONCERNS. ANYTHING.

Anyways, I'm going to work. I have off tomorrow and I broke the ff investment seal for today so insanity and updates will be here tonight and homework will be tomorrow.

HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GOOD DAY <3

(9:30) I am literally falling asleep as I lazily write this angel based on Danse Macabre. Expect all of maybe one more update tonight if the tacos I am abt to receive don't wake me up LMFAO.

Also, I am almost saddened by not having something to post tm. Anyone want an early chapter of something that isn't Genesis/Desolation bc they're both on Monday?????? (I am feeling like a menace rn)

(10:19) tacos and the absolute yap session I just had did wake me up a bit. MAAAYBE might write some more. Idk I slept like three hours last night and went to work I'm kinda dead. But we're at 98.2k!!!!!!🥳

(11:06) okay we made it to 99.6k everything besides the flashback for 31 is done. I'm about to relax and watch something and figure out mechanics of some of this because god this series is A BEAST. Like, I still have six planned chapters left.

Pure insanity. I love it here. I hate it here.

Holy shit wait I just came to the realization that I started this fic exactly one month ago. I have belted out 99.6k for THIS FIC ALONE. (Moreso if we're including future shit that hasn't happened yet)

IN ONE MONTH.

THAT IS FUCKING CRAZY WHAT HTE FUCK LMFAOOOO

I may or may not be cooking we’ll find out in 6-26 business hours

(5:28) So I just had a very interesting past few business hours. I read a fic I've been waiting ever so patiently to finish. That's cool, right. I go for a walk at 4 in the morning because I'm insane. Fantastic. I get home at five and I'm like ohhhh well what do I do now it's not sleep time yet. Oh write I'm supposed to be drawing.

Nope I reread the epilogue of morning glory and realized Tweek's first address is for my morning glory and Craig's last sign off is your morning glory and now I'm ready to throw myself on the curb with the garbage as I sob. Someone call a trusted adult for me thanks.

[atomicladytimetravel]

If It’s Wrong, I Don’t Want to be Right Part 1 - Brat

Summary: After wandering alone for days, you’re taken into Jackson by Tommy and Joel. You butt heads with Joel at first - he’s mean and you’re a brat - but things get spicy later.

A little mean!Joel, female reader, dirty talk but no sex in this part. 20+ year age gap (reader is in her 30s, Joel is in his 50s). I’m gonna say MDNI because this will get explicit later on. 18+ ONLY.

I rewrote the previous story I posted. I like this version better and I’m going to do a series with it. I’m not sure of the word count, I wrote this on my phone.

I wonder where the fuck I am.

You’d been walking for days past dilapidated strip malls and through ghost towns with no names. You searched for any signs of life, but had found none. You had seen abandoned campsites and communities and you searched them, hoping to find food that had been left behind, but to no avail. You ran out of food and water yourself two days ago and you were getting desperate.

You were the lone survivor of a clicker attack that had wiped out the small group you had been traveling with. The gun holstered at your hip was useless, as you’d used all the bullets putting down clickers, and then your friends. You were a skilled fighter, but unfortunately, your friends had not been. Your father had been ex-military and, though you were only ten when the outbreak began, he taught you everything he could to protect yourself.

As the sun began to set, you started looking for a place to bunker down for the night. Traveling alone in the daytime was dangerous enough, especially for a woman. You considered herself lucky that you hadn’t run into anyone else so far.

You settled for a small house that looked relatively intact. You cautiously opened the front door and peered inside, scanning the front room for any danger. Once you were satisfied that the room was clear, you went inside and quietly checked the kitchen and dining room. You scanned the cabinets for food, but came up empty handed. You were getting ready to check the other rooms when a clicker emerged from the last door down the hallway. Then, a second appeared next to it. Your plan was to leave as quietly as possible, but when you took your first step back, your foot crunched on broken glass.

Shit.

The clickers whipped around at the sound and you took off running. The only thing you had to defend herself was the knife given to you by your father years ago. You unsheathed it while you ran. You got lucky and sunk the knife into the head of the first clicker before it could attack. You yanked it out and threw it at the second one, the blade sinking right into its skull. If the clicker had a target on its head, you would’ve hit the bullseye. You pulled the knife from the second clicker and stood with your chest heaving. You were dizzy, weak from a lack of sustenance. You turned and saw two men on horses watching you.

“Nice throw,” one of them said.

“Thanks,” you panted before promptly passing out.

When you awoke, you were lying on a cot in a makeshift infirmary. You sat up and looked around, catching the attention of a woman on the other side of the room.

“You’re awake!” the woman smiled. She poured some water from a pitcher and brought it to you.

“Oh my god, thank you,” you said, taking the glass from her. You drank the entire thing in seconds.

“Where am I?” you asked once the glass was empty.

“You’re in Jackson, Wyoming. A couple of our patrolmen brought you in after you passed out,” she replied. “I’ll be back in a few minutes. Tommy will want to know you’re awake.”

She left the room, returning a few minutes later with a man and another woman.

“Hi, I’m Tommy Miller. This is my wife Maria,” he introduced them. They both smiled warmly. You gave them your name.

“How are you feeling?” Maria asked.

“Weak, but okay,” you responded.

“That was some impressive knife work out there,” Tommy complimented. “What else can you do?”

You shrugged.

“Shoot, hand to hand combat - my dad was ex-military.”

“We’ll have to see what you’ve got once you have your strength back. We could use a good fighter for patrol,” Tommy said.

“You want me to stay?” you asked.

“Only if you want to.”

You only had to consider it for a moment. You had nowhere else to go and no plans.

“That’s very generous and I would love to. Thank you.”

Life in Jackson was infinitely better than the life outside you’d become accustomed to. There was a steady supply of food and water and you had a job - Tommy put you on the patrol rotation as soon as he found out how good of a fighter you were. You made fast friends with a girl named Holly you’d met while volunteering in the community garden.

You’d made several friends, actually. You were the kind of person who was nice until given a reason not to be. If anyone was going to give you a reason not to be, it was Tommy’s older brother Joel. He was standoffish and more than a little rude. Most people in Jackson were intimidated by him, but you weren’t. He got under your skin from time to time, sure, but you could most definitely handle him if you needed to.

Unfortunately, he was as attractive as he was rude. He was ruggedly handsome with salt and pepper hair and deep brown eyes. He had a good twenty years on you, at least, but that didn’t stop the dirty thoughts from crossing your mind.

Admittedly, it was you who started the first argument between yourself and Joel. He had it coming, though. You’d literally just met the man and he had been so rude.

He was sitting alone at the bar in the Tipsy Bison. Tommy took you to meet him once you’d gotten out of the infirmary, considering Joel was the man with him the day they took you in. You’d said hello and smiled at him, but all you got in return was an uninterested glance.

“I said hello,” you asserted.

“Hello,” he scowled, rolling his eyes.

“Joel, don’t be rude,” Tommy sighed.

“Don’t worry about it Tommy,” you said, glaring at Joel. “If this is how he is, I don’t want to talk to him anyway.”

“I’m truly disappointed,” Joel deadpanned as you walked away.

“You should be!” you countered over your shoulder.

The second time was his fault. You were minding your business in the garden when he approached.

“Well, well, if it isn’t The Brat,” he taunted. You wrinkled your nose at him.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Don’t act like one,” he shrugged. You sighed and put down your gardening shears.

“Do you need something, Miller?”

“Wouldn’t be here if I didn’t, would I?”

“Listen, just tell me what you want. I’m not in the mood for your bull shit,” you huffed. He raised an eyebrow. Had he finally met his match?

“Tomatoes,” he grumbled.

“Fine,” you nodded. You gathered some tomatoes in a basket and handed them to him without looking at him

“What kind of customer service is this?” he quipped.

“The kind you get when you get on my fucking nerves,” you sassed. “If that’s it, kindly get the fuck out of here.”

His eyebrows furrowed angrily.

“Don’t tell me what to do, brat,” he argued.

“Oh my god,” you said exasperatedly. “Miller, I have better things to do than argue with you. Do you need something else or are we done here?”

He scowled at you and left without a reply. You were starting to hate him, but you hated yourself even more for thinking about him whenever your hand was between your legs.

Every other interaction with Joel went about the same - he was rude and you were combative. He liked to call you brat and that both infuriated you and turned you on.

Everything came to a head one day after a few months of the back and forth. It was late afternoon, about an hour before you were supposed to report for patrol. You were sitting on your porch reading your favorite book. Tommy was approaching in the distance, but you were so engrossed in the story that you didn’t see him. You also didn’t hear when he called your name the first time. When he called out a little louder, you jumped and looked over at him.

“Sorry,” he chuckled. “Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“No worries,” you laughed. “What’s up Tommy?”

“You’re on patrol with Simpson tonight, right?” he asked. You sighed. If anyone here was as annoying as Joel, it was Paul Simpson. He was obnoxious and didn’t know when to stop talking.

“Supposed to be, unfortunately.”

“Well I’ve got good news and bad news. The good news is that he broke his hand and won’t be able to help tonight,” he said with a grin. Tommy wasn’t Simpson’s biggest fan either.

“Great! So what’s the bad news?”

“Joel is his replacement.”

“Ugh, Tommy why?” you whined.

“Nobody else could do it,” he shrugged. “Listen, I need to go meet Maria. Be a doll and tell me for him, will ya?”

He turned without waiting for an answer. He didn’t want to be the one to tell his brother he had to work on his night off with his least favorite person.

“Hey! He’s your brother!” you called after him.

“Sorry!” he called back over his shoulder.

“This should be fun,” you grumbled to yourself as you marked your place in your book.

You found Joel in the Tipsy Bison, sitting alone at the bar. You sat next to him on one of the barstools and gave him a sarcastic smile when he looked at you.

“What do you want, brat?” he asked gruffly. You rolled your eyes at the name.

“Simpson’s off duty tonight. He broke his hand,” you answered.

“What’s that got to do with me?” he snapped.

“Tommy says you’re his replacement.”

“And why can’t you be his replacement?” he asked, annoyed.

“You’re gonna love this,” you laughed dryly. “I’m already on duty.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” he hissed, his fist slamming on the bar. Several people flinched, but you did not. You glared at him.

“Listen Miller, I know everyone else here is intimidated by you, but you don’t fucking scare me. I don’t know if you just need to get laid or what, but I’m tired of your fucking attitude. You,” you poked your finger into his arm, “are going to learn to talk to me with some god damn respect.”

You pushed the barstool away from the bar and headed for the door. Joel downed the rest of his drink and followed you. Everyone in the bar watched the two of you curiously as you exited.

“I don’t owe you any fucking respect,” Joel spat. “I don’t even know you.”

“Go fuck yourself Miller,” you said without turning around. “And adjust your attitude before patrol.”

You entered your house and slammed the door. Joel barged in behind you and slammed it again.

“Excuse me, this is my - “

He cut you off with a hand to your throat, pushing you against the wall. The action made desire pool in your belly.

“Who do you think you are talking to me like that?” he growled. You smirked at him.

“Are you trying to scare me? I already told you, I’m not afraid of you.”

“Yeah? Even with my hand wrapped around your pretty little throat?” he asked, his face inches from yours.

“My pretty little throat, huh? Sounds less like you want to hurt me and more like you want to fuck me,” you teased. You looked up at him seductively. “What if I told you I’d let you?”

“God damn it,” he mumbled before his lips crashed against yours. He moved his hand from your throat and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling your body to his. You wrapped your arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. It was all tongue and teeth, desperate, like this was something you’d both wanted for a while.

“I see you walking around here in these little cutoff shorts,” he said, reaching down and squeezing your ass. “That ass just begging to be spanked like you deserve.”

“You think about me Joel?” you murmured sultrily. He was almost ashamed to admit how many times he’d jerked himself off thinking about you. Almost.

“Every time I touch my cock, sugar,” he smirked. The thought set your body on fire.

“I like to think about getting you all fired up so you’ll run that little brat mouth,” he said, dragging his thumb across your bottom lip. “Spank you a little and then shove my cock down your throat.” You were practically melting at his words. “I bet you get off on being a brat, huh?”

“Maybe I do,” you responded cheekily. “Is that why you’re such a dick? Cause you get off on me being a brat?”

His hand was still on your ass and he gave it a sharp spank. You squealed and he chuckled.

“Maybe so.”

“You know if you want to fuck, you can just say so. I’ll be your brat whenever you want me to be,” you told him. You popped the top button on his flannel and moved your pointer finger in circles on his chest. “You can use me however you want.”

You undid a few more buttons as you talked and you pressed soft kisses to his chest.

“God damn, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he groaned. He caught sight of the clock you kept on the wall and swore under his breath.

“We only got five minutes sugar. Gonna have to pick this up after patrol.”

“Damn,” you sighed. “Okay. It’s gonna look real weird with you coming out of my house after all this time though.”

“Just yell at me as I go out the door. Slam it. Make it look real convincing,” he said. He walked towards the door; before he opened it, he turned to you with a smirk.

“I’m going to fucking ruin you later.”

“I hope so,” you said, returning his smirk. He opened the door and you put on your best angry face.

“Get the fuck out Miller, and don’t ever barge into my house again!” you yelled.

“Fuck off!” he yelled back. “And don’t fucking be late!”

You slammed the door, a grin spreading across your face.

This will be fun.

[chrisismine22]

Not enough

FIRST POST.

chris and you are"freinds" right?

TW! smut, unprotected sex, p in v, use of toys, masturbating, pet names, language, drinking.

y/n and chris

It was 10 at night and you were exhausted from your meetings. Tomorrow was a big day and you were so exited. You were planning on meeting up with a bunch of your friends for the triplets birthday. You were most exited to see Chris. You and the triplets had been friends since high school but you had connection with Chris. You didn't know what it was but being around him made you feel warm and cozzy. His voice was calming and he was HILARIOUS. You decided to text him before you went to bed.

y/n:Heyyy wyd

Chris: hey y/n im trying to go to sleep rn but u texted me

y/n: shut up bru

Chris: well Nick invited Larray. I thought you would be happy so ya

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

you and Larray were such good friends. His energy made your day. Everyday. Even when he was mad, it was still funny and made you giggle.

y/n:YAYYYYYY

Chris: glad ur happy y/n

well cu tmrw

y/n: byee chrisyyyyy

Chris: dont call me that

y/n: fineee

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Talking to Chris made you so happy no matter the topic. You decided it was best for you to just sleep for now cause u also wanted to buy a new outfit tmrw.

next morning---

Its almost 12. "Shit, i'm gonna be late" You quickly got up from bed and went to change. You threw on some grey sweats and a baby-T. You didn't put on a bra tho cause you thought you were just gonna go to get an outfit. By the time you finished eating it was like 1 so you just decided to stay home. The mall was to far from your house to get new clothes so you just went to fix up you hair and put on some makeup. You were heading upstairs and when your phone started vibrating in your pocket. It was Chris calling.

"Hey Chrisy" you say with a smile cause you knew how he hated that name

"Shut up y/n. Do you want matt and I to pick you up. Nick said hes gonna try to get Tara to come to the party so he wont be coming to pick you up"

"Ya Im just gonna fix my hair and shi but you guys can come in like 20 min"

"ok let me tell Matty"

you giggled at the nickname Chris gave his brother. you just hung up the phone and started your make up.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was about 30 min later and you were sitting on the couch. You didnt chage your clothes cause you would be uncofortable in smth fancy anyways. plus the triplets and u were close so it didnt matter what you wore. You heard a knock at ur door and got up from the couch. It was chris.

"HIIII" you said giving him a hug

"HIIII" he said hugging you back.

"wheres Matt?" you didnt see him because oyu were caught up in looking at Chris' new shirt. It was just a white T but it was right up on his abbs. "God" you thought to yourself

"Matts in the car waiting, ru ready?"

"oh ya sry we can go now" you said as you giggled a bit.

Chris was looking into your eyes but you didn't think anything of it cause you know, we're friends.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was now almost 9pm and the party was going great. Chris decided to get a little drunk which confused you cause he never drank. You were dancing when you felt two large hands on your waist. It was Chris

"Fuck you scared me chris"

"Sry ml"

you gasped at the new nickname. You knew he was drunk for sure

"Chris! get urself together bud" you laughed

His sleepy eyes looked into yours. You gasped again but this time, it was at the feeling in you stomach.

"Im not doing anything baby"

You didnt know what to say. because you liked it. You just decided to ingnore him until he pulled you in.

"Dont ignore me sweethart, I wanna hear your pretty voice again"

His low voice and the names you were given made you throb to you core. You decided it wouldnt be HOriBle.

"ok handsome" you dragged your fingers down his chest. You were drunk but not as drunk as him.

Chris didnt hesitate one bit, pulling you in and smashing his lips against yours. A slight moan escaped your throat at the sudden contact. You bodies were so close you could feel his bulge.

He broke the kiss, pulling you arm toward his room. It took you a second to realize what was going on after his kiss. Hypnotising as his tongue wandered your mouth. He swung open the door and pushed you in the bed.

"Chris what ru doing"

"Dont worry baby,"

You didnt know what to think because you guys were "friends". right?

Chris climbed on the bed, slamming his lips to yours again. You felt one of his hands travel down to your tits.

"Fuck you dont have a bra baby"

"Chris, we cant do this"you hated saying that cause you really did want to do this

"why not sweetheart"he groaned slowly kissing your neck

once again, you ignored him enjoying the plessure of his lips and his hands on you sensitive nipples. You were wet. So wet you couldn't explain.

After a bit of you whimpering and quietly moaning Chris kissed a trail down to your thighs. Before doing anything, he looked up at you for consent. You slowly nodded as he pulled your sweats of. He stared at the puddle formed in your thong.

"wet for me princess"

"Chris pleae--" you were interupted by a moan escaping your mouth as you rubbed slow but strong circles on your clit.

"please what baby, I wanna know what you want my love"

Your back arched at the feeling of his finger caressing your folds. "plea-please touch m--"

"you want me to make you feel good dont you"

you hummed in response loosing the ability to speek has the circles got faster and rough. You loved it so much. The pet names and his deep voice turned you on enough. without warning, Chris shoved two fingers into you. "Chris!" you moaned his name as his long veiny fingers hit your g-spot immediately. "you like that princess" he grinned as his pace sped up, still hitting your g-spot

"mhm" you whimpered as you felt a knot growing in you lower stomach. "Im-- close" you could barely get words out of your mouth because of the pure pleasure u felt. "cum all over my fingers baby" Those words set you off, squirting your liquid all over his finger. You were catching your breath when you looked at chris. his bulge was unbelievable and it turned you on, even after you just came."your such a good girl f'me you know" he praised you as he licked his fingers"taste so good mm" he groaned. Without thinking, you quickly pushed him on his back, desperate for him to be in you. You kissed him desperately as you grinded on his member. he was big, and you loved it. "wtf do you think your doing" he grabbed you hips holding them in place. "please chrisy, i want you daddy" you said whimpering at the loss of friction. That five letter word made him go crazy as he grinded you on him, helping you gain friction. You were a moaning mess and his boxers weren't even off yet. "your such a slut y/n. your my slut" You couldnt listen as you were derperate for his cock. lifting you hips, you slid his boxers down watching his long cock smack his pelvis. He was leaking pre-cum all over his pink tip. You decided to contain yourself for a bit as you palmed his tip slowly."agh fuck it--- feels so good" you knew he loved it from the groans and whimpers but you needed him now. You aligned his gurthy cock with you needy cunt and sank onto him. A pornographic moan escaped you mouth. "o princess your so tight i love it".

At this point you weren't listening to him, instead focused on the feeling of his dick deep inside you. he grabbed your waist only to thrust deeper into you. Both you guys' moans were getting uncontrollable. You could feel Chris' dick throbbing in you which meant he was close.

"fil-fill me up daddy"

The last word pushing hit to the edge. As you felt his warm liquid shoot inside of you the know in your stomach released, causing you to orgasm again. It felt so good. as you rode out you high chris started massaging your clit again. Again, it felt so good. the overstimulate wasnt painful but felt amazing. this time he wanted to be in charge. giving you barely any time to breath, he flipped you over onto your back again.

This time there was no teasing. You felt him slamming right into you. You did feel pain but it felt soooo goood. Your moans turned into screams as his member reached somewhere no one could reach. The squelching noises and your moans turned him on even more. You didnt think it was possible be this desperate for more but you were. He was pounding. All you could do was enjoy as you tits bounced up and down. it was mezmorizing how quiet but how loud he was. His groans made you reach you high faster each time. You were grspimg on the sheets as his cock made you nausuos in a good way. You couldnt get over it. Without saying anything you came all over him screaming his name

'' CHRIS OMFG'' your moans were so loud anyone could hear. As you were way overstimulated, Chris finaly came in you again. "fuck my princess" he moaned

He slowly pulled out as he flopped next to you on the bed.

''Fuckkk y/n your to good. I love you''

''I love you too chris''

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 12 – OTHER MARVEL SHIPS

SAM/BUCKY

just won't do right by glittercake

Pairing: Sam/Bucky Rating: G Words: 7,521 Tags: Jealous Bucky, Idiots in Love, Oblivious Sam

Summary: Sam's eyebrows go up, impressed, and he reaches over to squeeze Torres' shoulder, "This is amazing, kid. Thanks, really." Bucky sits and watches in utter horror as the pink darkens on Torres' cheeks. Oh, he realizes. Oh. Fuck.

Reasons why I love it: Jealous Bucky is just the best. And I love Torres, so having him be the catalyst for some good old Sam-Bucky angsting is fantastic. Sarah is amazing in this too, I love all of their characterizations honestly. This fic is super sweet, and if you haven't already, I hope you check it out for yourself!

Subtlety Not Our Strong Point by copperbadge

Pairing: Sam/Bucky Rating: T Words: 2,944 Tags: Alternate Universe, Engagement, Brunch

Summary: Bucky is not good at proposing, but once he managed, he and Sam were going to let people find out organically. Unfortunately, Tony Stark has never done anything organically in his life.

Reasons why I love it: Whelp, say what you want, but you can't deny it – Bucky's way has its merits. I love this one, Sam and Bucky are so in love, and Tony crashing their plans without even meaning to is fucking hilarious. This fic is really sweet, and I hope you go and check it out for yourself!

show me if you want me (and i will be your friend) by notcaycepollard

Pairing: Sam/Bucky Rating: E Words: 3,027 Tags: Casual Sex, Friends With Benefits, Porn With Feelings

Summary: Bucky's gotta give it to the future for this: they've turned casual sex into a goddamn art. What is a friend with benefits, he types into Google, and spends the next two hours reading about the distinctions between booty calls and friends with benefits and fuck buddies. It’s extremely informative. He’s gonna put it to good use, like, pretty much immediately.

Reasons why I love it: Jesus Christ, this fic is so hot, holy shit. And just as the cherry on top, there are feelings all over it, good, mushy feelings, fuck yes. I love how Bucky ambushes Sam in the beginning and how Sam just goes with it. It's so fun and so sweet and oh my god, you need to read this if you haven't, it's so good!

three words that became hard to say by suzukiblu

Pairing: Sam/Bucky Rating: G Words: 1,924 Tags: Male Friendship, Fluff, Bucky Needs a Hug

Summary: “I wanna step out with Wilson,” Bucky says, audibly traumatized. Steve blinks again, and lowers the shield. “Uh,” he says. “Come again?”

Reasons why I love it: Their voices in this are so perfect, that old-timey forties Brooklyn drawl. I love Steve and Bucky's friendship here, and Steve's need to protect Bucky and keep him happy always is so heartwarming. Plus, Bucky's crush on Sam is the cutest thing ever. I love this fic to bits, and I bet you will too!

what i like about you baby (is how you annoy me daily) by notcaycepollard

Pairing: Sam/Bucky Rating: M Words: 8,951 Tags: Post-Civil War, Bickering, Roommates

Summary: “I’m not sharing my room,” Sam mutters, knowing as he says it that it sounds exactly like he’s a fucking ten year old facing a new sibling. Steve hastily makes what Sam thinks is supposed to be an understanding face. “Of course not,” he says soothingly. “He can bunk in with me, it’s not like we haven’t done it before. It's a twin room, anyway, there's already a spare bed.” Sam guesses a bigger house is out of the question. Whatever; the three of them have spent eight hours crammed in a Mini, it can’t be that bad. It’s not that bad. It’s worse.

Reasons why I love it: Sam and Bucky being asshole roommates while Steve despairs at them from the sidelines is something I never knew I needed. This fic is so fucking good, funny and heartfelt and adorable in turns, with fantastic dialogue and characterization. I love it so much, and I hope you go and read it for yourself, because it's amazing!

[ahsoka-its-all-of-us]

Finally home and I can watch the Bad Batch season finale

So you know what’s gonna happen next

I’m about to scream into the void in a post that is probably gonna be mostly incoherent

Anyway, here goes!

Omega including Crosshair ;-; and then Hunter immediately being on the fence about it 🙄 Like dude just admit you don’t want him back ugh. At least the others overruled him

What mission is Rex on? Is it smooching Ahsoka?

TECH AND PHEE you know I changed my mind about them, I think they’re adorable ;-;

I am understanding the Tech stans more and more, man is hot when he’s in his element 😳

I love that dude at the summit who sort of stands up for the clones

KRENNIC AND PROJECT STARDUST NO OH MY GOD

Wrecker putting his faith in Omega but also straight up asking her if she’s up to instead of just putting her up for the job, god the man truly is the only sane one in the batch huh AND HE’S KICKING THE MOUSE DROID

SAW OH MY GOD DFKNFSLDNFRUGNKS I love how we’re getting more and more insight in his path towards being an extremist

Would this be around the time that his Lasat mercenary killed Kallus’s unit?

Also funny how this plan of his kinda parallels the one in Rebels season 4, but then it was Saw who wanted to follow the kyber crystal to its destination and the Alliance that wanted it destroyed

That was episode 15, now on to 16 👀👀👀

TARKIN GIVING THE DO IT LINE AMAZING

Hey you know who would have been extremely useful on this mission? Crosshair! The squad is not at its strongest without him

TECH NO!!!!!!!!!

Omega is me

You know I am not gonna accept it either. Tech is gonna do a Maul. He has to

So they’re giving up on Crosshair?

And they’re back with Cid? Why? Why not go directly to Pabu? Ofc she would betray them urgh

Fuck okay I said before that the Batch needed to experience loss, but I meant like Hunter or something ;-:

Maybe the clones are paternal because their template was, ever considered that?

NO HEMLOCK DON’T CANONISE IT NO NO NO

He’s lying. He’s got Tech detained too. Tech isn’t dead. I am not accepting this

Love how they both immediately know it’s Echo

Well we all knew this season would end with them having to save Omega

Crosshair ;-;

SEE I KNEW EMERIE WAS A CLONE

also

HUNTER YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE

TECH SACRIFICED HIMSELF TO SAVE HIS BROTHERS INCLUDING CROSSHAIR AND YOU WANNA REPAY THAT BY FUCKING RETIRING?!?!?

GO SAVE CROSSHAIR YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU

[notasapleasure]

WIP ask meme

@stripedroseandsketchpads tagged me in this. And oh my god. If you think there are Too Many Words in the fic I publish, you should see my poor notes app. Here is a sneak peek of its contents. I haven't edited for brevity/those I'm actively working on, these are just all the unfinished files I could find. Some I don't intend to do any more with, others I'd really like to pick up again. The only ones being actively worked on right now are the Andor Saga AU and the first one on the list for Andor.

I put ALL the Lymond I could find in mainly for @oughtaagh who has been leaving the most lovely comments on my Lymond fics that I have totally failed to respond to. I'm sorry! I will cycle back round to Lymond one day, it's inevitable <3

Tagging uh.... @distressednoise, @r0b0tb0y, @faceofpoe, @donnaimmaculata, @batri-jopa, @elwenyere, @notabuddhist and anyone else who wants to say I tagged them! Also sorry if you'd already been tagged, I'm not keeping up with the dash very well at the moment!

Anyway please send me asks/comments/cease and desist orders about these. xxx

ANDOR

C: We decided we were thirsty, and you wanted to go to Cavo's. As yet untitled Brassian alternative scene - what if instead of a great collaborative cover story this was a great collaborative fuck? Almost(?) finished?

Saga AU pt 2. This actually does have a working title of 'The Bear and the Berserk' but this doc is just a short bullet point list of plot things for a specific part of the fic.

Cassian pov. It's a Cassian pov chapter! For...drumroll...the first chapter of the Saga AU pt 2! The rest is going to be back to Brasso FPN. The file actually includes a rough first draft of chapter 2, as well.

"You're up early this morning," Bix says lightly. A follow-up chapter to Only Ever Just One Night started back when I had epic plans for continuing this, bringing in Cinta and Vel and Luthen, whumping the hell out of Brasso, and having Cassian rescue him. This is just one scene of awkward conversation with tea though.

Oh god it developed Plot. Related to the previous chapter - a bullet-pointed list of things that might have happened in this fic I Wil Not Write (not least as I'd rather just see what happens in S2 first anyway).

AND THEN WE DANCED

It was a sunny day in Batumi... Patchy few paragraphs of the next chapter of Inchoate.

Plannnnns (again). Plans for how Inchoate would/will continue.

THE LYMOND CHRONICLES

Canon-verse/other AUs

Multiple pieces of follow-up to The next man with a ladder, Danny/Jerott post-canon: It was dark when they rode into the port town... [Chapter 3, basically done, plus most of Chapter 4 but it devolves into broken paragraphs at the end]. "I'm going to the other bed," Danny said in a voice like someone was standing on his throat... [??? there's loads of this written! This is the file where they Get Down To It] Stitch the scenes together [a few paragraphs in which I hoped to make a logical leap from Chapter 4 to fucking, but seemingly never quite got there].

Lymondar saga draft. Actually two files of the abortive first effort at writing a saga AU. I was trying much harder to write in saga style and playing with lacunae in a way that was fun for me but exceedingly nerdy. I think I found the idea more fun than the execution, too.

St Seb. Remember ages ago when I was writing a post-canon 'Jerott gets shot full of arrows and has to admit his feelings because he thinks he's gonna die' fic? This is the file! Some bullet points and some text, some of which I even posted as Sunday sixes way back when iirc.

Fait prosperer qui n'est à croire vain. Fuck me, there's LOADS of this. Pawn in Frankincense/Ringed Castle AU where Marthe steals Lymond's ride with Kiaya Khatun and persuades her they should take over Russia together. Meanwhile Francis is left with Jerott. Hahaha. It kept getting longer because Francis kept trying to escape and I kept finding ways to drag him back, but the 'and now kiss!!' with the two of them behaving in character was just not coming easily.

Francis Crawford's Holistic Inquisition Agency. I wrote this??? One chapter of a Lymond/Dirk Gently AU, where Francis is obviously Dirk and Jerott is a furious/bemused Todd.

She tried every instrument, she redrew every chart. A few short chapters, never finished, of Marthe wrestling with her role in canon and her fate as assigned by La Dame. A couple more paragraphs of a similar sort of thing in Volos.

Malta. Half-arsed few paragraphs of wondering how Jerott would cope with meeting a fellow Knight being imprisoned for sodomy.

Band AU (my 1980s rock band AU for the series, see also @theartistknownaslymond)

Au of an Au. What if, after the Battle of the Bands at Solway, Jerott went to stay at the Edinburgh townhouse for a while and he and Francis got to collaborating in the shed? There's quite a lot of this and it's quite fluffy.

Out out out! The band celebrate Thatcher's downfall. Happy epilogues for everyone! However it's an epic task trying to do all the characters justice, so I was trying to write it as vignettes to match each song on the playlist. Six-ish are written. And earlier draft with plan for characters intercting is in Ding dong the witch is dead.

Jerott/Marthe - four times it just about worked, one time it really didn't. What it says on the tin? aka you just know Jerott has said 'Francis' instead of Marthe at least once when he comes. Only the beginning of the first time exists in this chapter, but I think I explored the idea elsewhere, whenever I dig up that file...

DWTH missing scene. Jerott/OC missing scene from Don't wake the house. Not finished, probably not going to be finished. I think I have enough Jerott smut on the go.

Workshop. Patchy draft of pre-canon Jerott and GRM 'therapy' session in which GRM learns about Francis Crawford and what a hold he has on the boy he thought of as his own plaything. GRM doesn't like sharing.

F/P. Draft of a fluffy kiss prompt someone (@erinaceina? @notfromcold?) sent for Francis/Philippa. Post-canon pregnant Philippa and worried Francis written when it was too hot in summer. It's probably complete enough to post tbh! hmu if you want it posting.

Jerott behaving badly (again). Somehow this ended up in the 'comfortember' section of the notepad, which...no? Maybe it was intended to be originally, but it grew a life of its own. Post-canon, post split-up with the OC, pre-getting together with Danny. Joining the mile high club and regretting it, then ending up crashing at Joleta's (who he meets coincidentally at the airport, NOT who he's screwing in the airplane loo!!). It's meant to end up cathartic, but didn't get finished :') I'm actually really pleased with what I have - post-canon Joleta is so much fun to write!

Somewhere (Google Drive?? an actual Word doc??) there is also loads and loads and LOADS of Pawn in Frankincense band AU around Baron Morgan's place (the Aga Morat), featuring fucked-up Francis/Morgan, fucked up Marthe/Kiaya, fucked up Francis/Kiaya, and bewildered cold turkey Jerott. There's also some Jerott/Marthe from later on.

Other

Crossover. A sequel to my ATWD fic I will shake mountains, where Merab and Irakli encounter celebrity diners in the restaurant they work in: respected musician Francis Crawford and friends take the boys for a drink and share queer/artistic inspiration/history with them. There's quite a lot written but I couldn't quite manage to finish it off.

St Mary's. Another ATWD/Lymond crossover, placing Merab and Irakli among the mercenaries of St Mary's. Mostly bullet points.

3m. Furious that there was no fic for the film Three Months I decided to jot down a scene I wanted to see afterwards. I wrote four lines and cannot remember what my plan was at all.

[familyvideowithsteve]

Little FYI for Façade readers (spoiler: i'm not posting soon but I offer you a teaser)

I've recently signed my lease for my apartment, I'm finally moving out of my mom's house, I have a lot to do/to plan out so even though I have about half of the next chapter written I'll probably be too busy with said apartment to write and post soon (as I had silently hoped to do).

But, I can offer you this:

He looked, couldn’t see anything until the lightning revealed a piece of wood impaled in her lower abdomen, the size of a small kitchen knife’s handle, his eyes and his eyebrows widened in shock, she could see fear and panic settling on his face.

It’s almost like she could hear his train of thoughts, like, “What am I gonna do if you die then and there?”

She tried putting his hands away to get up, trying to lean on her hands but she failed miserably to hide the pained groaned, “I’m fine, I just— Erh”

“If you fucking tell me you’re fine when you’re clearly not, I’m gonna lose my cool. You’re obviously not fine and I don’t fucking know what to do.”

“Neither do I Eddie, but we have to—” she paused as she flinched, she saw Eddie’s eyes, behind their strict browny shine, they reflected fear, he was afraid, his hands reaching her lower back and her arm, helping her sitting down, breathless, “—we need to find the others, and leave as soon as possible.”

“How? You’ve got a piece of wood inside your abdomen ! You can’t move !”

“We don’t know how bad it—”

“Oh my fucking God ! Are you fucking serious ?!,” He had raised his voice, and involuntarily, he had been given his location just by the strength of his voice to some demobats who had started roaming around the area, silent, hidden in the darkness.

His hand was about to raise up her shirt, curious and apprehensive of her wound, when he heard the most familiar shriek piercing through the sky, his head jerked so fast toward the sound, a red lightning struck at the right time, everything paused, he felt his body break out in cold sweat, a chill running along his spine, goosebumps rising on his arms.

His body had such a visceral reaction to seeing them flying towards them, not it, not one demobat, them, a wave of them just coming at them; his body jumped straight to panic mode.

He turned towards her and rushed to get on his feet to pull her up, ignoring her pained pleas, he heard some movements along the edge of the forest next to them, and he voluntarily decided to ignore it, even though he had the worst intuition ever.

With one hand tightly intertwined in hers, they started walking away, he could hear the wings flapping in the air towards them, he ignored her complaints, pained pleas, he tightened his hand intertwined with hers’, grabbing more of her wrist and started running.

He couldn’t precisely see where they were headed, he only thought that perhaps if they went further into the forest, the bats couldn’t follow them and they didn’t. He counted on the lightning and the colour of the portals to see and know where to not go, but he didn’t think that maybe the portal had lost its colour, perhaps it gained its black, dormant colour back.

Because he certainly didn’t see the ten feet portal they had just fallen into.

No, he certainly didn’t see that coming.

[gemwolfz]

good morning chat (<- it's 12:30 pm) its time for a GEM FROG WATCHPOST (instead of putting it in the bg while i draw because ive accepted i cant draw and read at the same time)

btw my very legal straming site doesnt have episode descriptions and no way im remembering an episode thats been mentioned by number so i have no idea what im getting into. also im setting a timer to truly see how long my autistic ass can stretch a 15 minute episode. ok lets get started :)

okay first of all intro i havent seen yet lets GOOOO. PURURU SIGHTING IN THERE HEY GIRL!! i actually need to watch some eps with pururu in em btw. like hey show her to me. anyway good intro lots of guys spotted :)

^ CATEGORY 5 DORORO EVENT HI. experiencing the horrors as usual i see

i see so this is what we're doing today huh. do you intend to rip my heart out.

im sorry they have a fucking invasion planning chore wheel? thats really funny

OH IT'S THIS ONE HUH. THIS IS WHAT WE'RE DOING HUH (lovingly)

wcdonalds btw. sorry sorry wcdonalds cracks me up every time in any show

^^ his ass did NOT process what was just said!!!

he had it right the first several times cmon man.

hes taking this in stride huh. even in category 5 THE LORE situations the silly grind doesnt stop

why is zeroro resonance so fucking stupid btw. sorry man.

screenshot that speaks for itself man

somehow i dont think "my alien ninja partner is in serious trouble i need to leave immediately" will be counted as an excused absence by your teachers but after scaling a building in a single leap i dont think anybodys gonna question you. i love you koyuki

[this image set broke in the editor but it included keroro and tamama calling zeroro SO MEAN for not explaining his plan to them] frankly i respect keroros unwillingness to treat situations with the proper gravity because i do the same thing king

his ass does not care

he changed his mind something is terribly wrong

okay lets be real here the platoon would NOT have found him there. if he hadn't been able to contact koyuki he'd have been fucked. badly. something something being saved again by the person who showed you the warmth and beauty the planet has to offer

literally yeah the fate of the planet is held by natsumi being able to throw frogs like splat balls. pov youre giroro and the number one person standing between you guys and invasion is decidedly the girl who is constantly personally stopping you from blowing shit up. this is a personal attack

important and relevant but also im sorry "brat" is incredibly funny word choice coming from tamama

no reaction i can put into words. btw this episode is labelled as a filler episode. just so you know. i just think thats funny. haha so silly

aye.......................................... i would be using more reaction images but i have to prioritize screenshots. anyway god.

they were holding their fucking BREATH. his ass could have died!! badly!!! their deep sigh of relief is not as visible as i'd have hoped but you know. you feel me.

there are reactions i am making that are sound effects i cannot put into words sorry. im better at posting silly nonsense im sure you understand. hell, post horse staring at the ocean MAN again

he goes "i'm sorry about that, everyone!" as if it was fucking nothing. DUDE. This is why you caught that trauma-eating brain parasite because you just act like shit was NOTHING DUDE...

........yea...........................

NO EYECATCH OR ANYTHING? YOURE JUST GONNA TAKE US TO THE NEXT EPISODE? OKAY. OKAY THATS FINE. THAT'S FINE.

gem conclusion:

anyway i spent an hour watching this ten minute episode. sorry for maybe a weak reaction post i need to stir this episode in my head like a soup. thank you plates for your recommendation. join me in the rbs later as i may watch episode B and experience whatever tonal whiplash this episode came with

[saltsprite]

ohoho you posted an ask meme

🌀Post the fic summary for a fic you haven't written/published yet. It can be hypothetical or something you really plan on releasing...

❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

🌧️Share something angsty from your WIP.

🌈 Share something soft/fluffy from your WIP.

💧Share something romantic/hot from your WIP, or just something sweet if it's gen.

🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it? 🌪️

Sum up a WIP with a few fic tropes/Ao3 tags.

I should have fucking known LOL <3

🌀Post the fic summary for a fic you haven't written/published yet.

[oleander fools, Red Dead Redemption 2] Charles Smith (having loved and lost one Arthur Morgan) encounters Arthur's past love, Mary Linton, at Arthur's grave. Lonely, they fall into bed in a hotel in the nearest town. The next morning she asks for his hand in a marriage of convenience that turns sweeter.

I'm actually gonna do another one here, because I think these are both galaxy-brain ideas

[tentative title: seedlings, Jedi Survivor, gen fic] Boba Fett, for once in his 23-year-old life, has let a Jedi walk free. On top of that, today's bounty (Caij Vanda, a rival bounty hunter that'd been helping said karking Jedi) won't shut the hell up. Needing a drink before heading into the black, Boba takes Caij's advice to visit Pyloon's Saloon... only to find the same Jedi, again. To get away from him Boba heads to the rooftop gardens-- and there, finds a child who reminds him eerily of himself.

❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.

[untitled WIP, RDR2 Charthur] God, Arthur's stupid.

(yes i do think im funny, yes i will post another snippet because i like to post snippets)

[untitled WIP, Jedi Survivor, Cal/Bode] “Bode?”  Looking up, Bode finds Cal sitting on the cliff’s ledge above him, feet dangling over the edge. BD-1 chirrups something at him from Bode’s shoulder; Cal flashes a smile that doesn’t smell right to Bode. “Greez said I’d find you brooding out here.”  “Oh. Is that how he phrased it.” And— well, he had, but in much the same way as Cal had just smiled at him: The same way a damaged shield generator will cough and sputter before doing its damn job. Bode plants his hands on his hips. “What are you up to, then?”  Cal sniffs, before a crooked, sheepish grin appears. “Brooding.”

🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.

[oleander fools, RDR2] “What’re you lookin’ at?” Charles asks.  Arthur slaps on his dumbest grin, the besotted one he hides until they can be alone. “You, my flower.”  Laughing around a groan, Charles decides to play this one out. If Arthur’s going to open his big dumb mouth to say big dumb things, Charles can at least get some kind of entertainment out of it. “What kind?”  “Oleander.” Arthur’s answer is immediate, confident. Like he’s thought about it. A lot.  Crinkling his nose, Charles frowns. “Small and pink?”  Again, Arthur smiles— but it’s softer, sweeter. Missing his hat, some of his hair falls into his eyes as he dips to take Charles’s hand. He presses his thumbs into the pads and cushions of Charles’s calloused palm. “I handle you wrong, you’ll kill me real quick.” Arthur drops a warm kiss to palm center, then glances up at Charles looking almost shy and oozing boyish charm. “And that’s kinda the entire appeal.”

🌧️Share something angsty from your WIP.

[meet me halfway, Boba Fett/Cobb Vanth] Put your softness in my hands, Cobb had said before, those words so carefully chosen, his aim as true and unwavering as his desire. Nothing comes to mind, now. Nothing but the wretchedly tender truth that chokes him from the inside, clumping in his throat like he swallowed sand. There’s too much to say. He should say it. He needs to say it. There’s no fucking point in saying it now because he waited too long, it might kill him to say it, but he will try. He can try.  “If this all goes tits-up,” Cobb starts, wetting his lips — but Boba stops him, gently bumping a knuckle under his chin.  “Have you so little faith in me?” Boba scoffs, attempting lightheartedness despite the worry and grief already carved into the canyon bedrock of his face. He can't say it.

🌈 Share something soft/fluffy from your WIP.

[faith, freedom (RDR2, Charthur)] As he settles against Arthur’s chest Charles grunts in protest, but Arthur feels him smile. Combs fingers through Charles’s hair, made soft with some oil he’s begun using that smells of vanilla, its gentle perfume warmed and sharpened to a point with tobacco and camp smoke. Arthur breathes deep.

💧Share something romantic/hot from your WIP, or just something sweet if it's gen.

[faith, freedom (RDR2, Charthur)] “Beautiful.”  Charles snorts, ducking his head. “Now who’s sayin’ shit he don’t mean?”  “Aw, Charles,” Arthur tuts. He lets go in favor of running the flat of his nail up the fractal scar along Charles’s cheek. “Ought to know by now, I don’t suffer liars in my bed.”

🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.

[oleander fools] John Marston: ah, the Morgan widows Charles: …one widow J: Aw but you and Arthur were— y’know. So that’d be you and Mary together, I mean. C: no, no, a widow is a woman, widower is the man— J: yeah but it’s a man who died, so you’re his widow too C: DOUBT [x]

☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

idk what pairing, but i know there's a good Hades (game) AU in me somewhere, i KNOW IT. I feel like I can make it work best in SW, using planet names for each region (like... Naboo for Elysium, obvs Mustafar for Asphodel). If it's DinCobb, then Cobb is fighting through the underworld ruled by Boba Fett with Djarin in the Thanatos role. If it's Cal/Bode, then it's Cal fighting through, with Bode maybe posing as a helpful NPC... at first. >:3

🌪️Sum up a WIP with a few fic tropes/Ao3 tags.

Red Dead Redemption 2, Arthur Morgan/Charles Smith, Camping, First Time, Recreational Drug Use, And There Was Only One Tent

[eurydicees]

YOU WROTE 18K BY HAND?? i am so impressed i need to ask what you are writing about. holy shit u are like a god

oh my god ok THANK YOU for asking !!! also in the time since you asked this, i have written another 1,400 words by hand. Anyways. under the cut bc this got. too long.

so this was originally for the 50k big bang project, but it was cancelled so i'm gonna go ahead and talk about it publicly now. SO.

the sparknotes summary: it is an iwaoi post-canon coming of age relationship study !! it's about iwaizumi in california and oikawa in argentina and how they navigate their friendship while long distance. it quite literally walks through every step of their journey from graduation aoba johsai to meeting again at the 2020 olympics....the sheer amount of time i'm covering is why its currently ~88,000 words LMAO.

this fic is literally my little monster. it was supposed to be 30k. then it was supposed to be 50k MAX. it is now 88 thousand words long. anyways though i'm enjoying it.

it's a slow burn get together, but it's also a break up & make up fic. the idea is that they dated in high school and then had to break up bc of the distance--but i think they're probably going to get together in the end. the middle is a whole lot of them growing up and figuring out how they can have a healthy friendship even as adults and dealing with loneliness and adulthood on their own and really coming into themselves as people by the time that they get to the olympics.

i just finished parts two and three, which is iwaizumi's years at university. here are some BANGER lines, if i do say so myself:

after oikawa's visit to california, when he has to leave again:

Oikawa smiles at him, and with that, he takes the handle of his suitcase and walks into the airport. Farther and farther and farther away, until he’s disappeared from sight and Iwaizumi is standing alone again, next to the blinking red hazard lights and the sound of other cars’ wheels on cracked concrete.  He gets back into the car. He doesn’t really want to talk to Rich right now, or any one of his other friends or teammates. He kind of just wants to be alone.  So he turns off the hazard lights and puts the car in drive and then he takes the long way home.

when iwaizumi is talking to his friends about oikawa:

“It’s not a big deal,” he tries. “We’ve both moved on. It wouldn’t have lasted while we’re in different countries anyway.”  He does not mention that Oikawa had asked him to wait. He does not mention that he is—he is waiting, and he doesn’t plan on stopping. He doesn’t plan on breaking that promise to come home.  “Ah,” Em says, subdued.

during a drunken NYE call:

Iwaizumi can hear the flinch in Oikawa’s voice. “You miss me?”  “I’m not saying it again,” Iwaizumi says, and it sounds like it’s supposed to be angry, but it just comes out tired and sad. “Of fucking course I do. You’re—” “I’m what?”  Iwaizumi takes a shuddering breath. “You’re so far away, Tooru. You’re so far away and it makes me—fuck, fuck! I shouldn’t have called. I should—” “No!” Oikawa says it instantly, desperately, cutting off any idea that Iwaizumi should go. Which is good because as much as Iwaizumi wants to escape the embarrassment of this phone call, he doesn’t actually want to hang up. He doesn’t actually want to leave Oikawa now. “Stay. Please. Stay with me.”  Iwaizumi pauses for a moment, swallowing down Oikawa’s words and turning them over in his head before saying anything else. “Okay. I’ll stay.” 

anywayssssssss!!! it's been REALLY fun to write, but it's also like. an insane labor of love. this fic was my project for nanowrimo july of LAST YEAR, and it's my project again this year. isn't that crazy. so so so much has gone into this fic its literally driving me up the wall. it haunts my every waking moment and also my dreams.

but yeah i don't have wifi where i'm living for the summer, so i've been writing everything by hand and then typing it all up when i can use a hotspot on my phone. i also have the most amount of free time in my life than i have , like, EVER had in my non-child life. so i get to spend so much time writing, which has been sooooo fun. i am begging the universe to keep me from being burnt out bc i'm genuinely having the time of my life working on this.

ok phone's about to die gotta go. thank you for asking i want to talk about this SO bad. please feel free to ask me. please enable me i'm begging you

[arcplaysgames]

HUGE fan of Naoto's shadow. The childishness of it, the big chunky ray guys, the jet wings, the racing stripes.

Naoto keeps being told he's so mature for his age, and it's very obvious that it comes from taking every youthful impulse and crushing it down into a little box until it reaches critical mass and explodes.

Also, this fight was pitifully easy lmao. Either I'm overleveled or the game was not prepared for me to bring in Kanji, who hits like a motherfucking truck. Also Yosuke now dodges like 90% of attacks and I have no idea how he's doing that but it's great.

hoooooly shit this is so affecting. gold star performance form the VA. the sniffly loneliness of the shadow is so good. i want to hug them.

KANJI THAT'S SWEET OF YOU BUT HE'S GOT A POINT, OKAY?

Naoto's gender is "detective" basically.

asldkjflskdf OMG THE PERSONA IS SO TINY EEEEEEEEEEEE ITS SO CUTE uwu

I KNEW IT WAS PART OF YOUR PLAN YOU LIL SHIT

also god i really need to contend with how to refer to Naoto. so far i just don't know enough about how they feel about their gender to just swap to "she", and BELIEVE ME, the way the game is doing it is giving me fucking agida, since I am looking through my screencaps and lemme tell you, Naoto doesn't indicate that's cool with them.

So yeah, I think I answered my own question there. Naoto is gonna be "them" in my mental narrative until further notice. Certainly until I know more about how they feel about all this.

I'm just saying, dude, if being a girl is a prison and being a boy is a slow poison, maybe opt out of both? That's what I'd do, pal.

back home, Adachi is drunk???? Why are you here. Why are you drunk? I spoke to him on the way to find Naoto and he didn't seem terribly concerned about the disappearance.

oh so dojima knows too. I wonder what his motivation is for not speaking up. He also, upon our return from Iwatodai, asked Reverie to befriend Naoto and indicated things were rough for them. So he's sympathetic to the ace detective's ideas about the case too.

(man even writing "them" is really hard. this whole situation sucks lmao. thanks persona. I might use they/he? nothing fits right.)

I wish I could record clips because. There is something about this line read that made me stop and just stare at the screen for a bit... Adachi really really does give me Ryoji vibes, as in intense "I cannot trust you" vibes. But I'll get into that some more next post, as I did hit Rank 6 on his SLink, which is apparently the final rank????

ALSO THERE IS A WEIRD MOMENT THAT I LITERALLY CANNOT CATCH WITH A SCREENCAP. While Dojima is in the room, Adachi is doing the swaying drunkenly thing that Yukiko and Rise did too when they were "drunk" at the party. But like the moment Dojima leaves?

He stops swaying.

/lifts eyebrow

WITH THAT, I FINISHED NAOTO'S DUNGEON ON THE FIRST DAY. I gave the fox so much yen and just kept powering thru. SINCE THEN, I HAVE MAXED OUT KANJI AND YUKIKO! And I made a lot of progress on others. I'll summarize that later, it is almost midnight.