#because idk if there are enough hours in the day and i have a strict sleep schedule

[unrestrainedbalderdash]

Local person has to take a break from binging podcast because it's soon teatime and it'll be ready in less than the episode time, 234 dead 2354 injured

[lemonflavoreddishsoap]

CAN I REQUEST LA SQUADRA WITH AN S/O WHO HAS A SWEET TOOTH?? (like they would be late at night just eating something sweet and they would get caught because of the candy wrappers making noise)

I cannot handle much sweetness in my food but for some reason i love writing about characters who have sweet tooths???? idk why. very cute request idea :3

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La Squadra with an S/O with a sweet tooth

Formaggio

He learns about this trait of yours when the two of you get a crap ton of sweet treats together, only for him to find 90% of it gone within a day. He's not pleased, the way he complains about it you'd think it was the cat crying if you weren't watching him.

He isn't actually mad, obviously. I mean, in all honesty he was probably overestimating how many sweets he can handle, but...but the betrayal!!

Great new information now, because you're getting a new treat for your stash practically every day! He'll even come home with some incredibly bizarre sounding treat for either you to keep or for you to watch him eat.

Illuso

Illuso learns when he finds you stuffing your face sometime around midnight. He plucks the sweet from your hands and holds it over your head (if you're shorter than him). "Having a snack right now? If you were planning to stay up for some sweets, you should've let me join you." He doesn't let you stay up for much longer though, just enough for your sugar buzz to end before dragging you to bed.

He's absolutely the kind of fellow to just steal some treats right out of your hand/bag. Make sure you aren't standing around any mirrors as you happily snack, unless you WANT to be jump-scared by an arm suddenly emerging from the wall.

He's picky with sweets, too, so not only is staying cautious keeping you safe from theft, but also from criticism. If you decide to start subtly eating more of his favourite sweets to avoid this, it definitely won't go unnoticed.

Prosciutto

He became aware of your sweet tooth before you ever told him, and before any kind of eating-candy-late-at-night incident. He probably realises by the first time he's brought to your place. Whether it be a dedicated snack-y area somewhere in your kitchen or a few too many colourful wrappers in a trash bin, he takes note of the detail.

Prosciutto stays up pretty late, so it should've been expected that he would run into you digging into some chocolate "secretly" like a raccoon chowing down on some garbage. He stares at you, just a bit surprised that you'd decide to eat something so sugary in the middle of the night.

He doesn't mind your affinity for sweets and sometimes likes to indulge you by buying you fancy little candies and chocolates he thinks you'd enjoy, but he is strict about when you can eat them (no messing up your appetite or sleep!) it makes him seem like a parent but he just wants his partner feeling alright.

Pesci

Shuffling through the kitchen with the lights off was an obvious challenge for you, but flicking on the light's would've been a surefire way to get caught at this late hour. Well, unfortunately that worry is thrown out the window as you end up crashing into something that...yelps?

So, yeah! You discover each other's sweet tooths and bad habits in that same moment. Your best survival strategy is to team up, becoming the Late Night Delicacy Duo - Pesci feels bad about his secret snacks but having you indulge in it with him makes it go from shameful to fun.

His favourite sweets are hard candies, but he'll have a try of anything the two of you manage to scavenge!

Melone

Dude. It's fucking Melone. You don't need to get caught doing jackshit, he tastes the sweet on your fucking lips and figures it out from there. He can tell your favourite chocolate brand just based on your body language or something.

Sounds weird but hey! At least you've got a partner who knows what you like incredibly well, and you often find your preferred treats either in his hands when the two of you are going out or laying on your bed when you return home. He's always right on the money.

He's far from a sweets person himself, save for a few exceptions (namely cake), so he has absolutely no qualms with you having any treats he ends up receiving. Probably likes feeding you a bit. Not in a kink way or anything but like, listen, I think it'd be nice to have his gloved hand gently place chocolates in my mouth while he watches with those beautiful eyes. No don't leave no listen please-

Ghiaccio

He's grumpy enough when he wakes up in the morning, why would you even risk waking him up in the middle of the night? No matter now, because he's ripped the sweet from your hand, tucked it into a cupboard, just nearly slammed the door shut, and is dragging you back to bed.

But as long as you aren't snacking late at night, he's fine with it. He can be a tiny bit strict about it though; doesn't want you overdoing how many sweets you eat, and he does not like trying other people's food so don't ask him.

Just as with most things about you, he loves the trait subtly. His love for this one lies in how he glances at you when the waiter asks if the two of you want dessert after your meal, or the way he taps your arm if the two of you pass a colourful candy store mid-stroll.

Risotto

He likes licorice doesn't he. He does, doesn't he. Look me in the eyes, don't you see what i see hes a LICORICE LIKER

"I really hope your body goes through sugar well. That crash will not be pretty," is a very stupid thing to get jumpscared by, but in your defence you were MINDING your OWN BUSINESS and it's TWO AM- DOES THIS MAN SLEEP!???

Pleaseee ask him to share sweet treats with you, this man doesn't let himself have as many treats as he probably wants to. Beyond just the intimacy of sharing a moment together, you get to see him smile at the flavors. and isn't that what life is just all about.

Honestly if you're really really really in love with candy, he may get or make one one of those candy/chocolate bouquets, y'know the ones?

[yuri-is-online]

List of characters that i think smoke a lil weed:

Riddle. He needs to chill the fuck out. I don't think he'd be able to handle smoking though, physically or mentally, so like. Trey should maybe slip him a strawberry tart with some ganja in it

Cater. Let him find the will the live and spiritually high five Morgan freeman or smth idk

Ace and Deuce. Another day, another heart attack cause Yuu got into a situation again

Trey. Partially because we both know damn well how stressed he is on a daily, but mostly because I just want the strict "Rule Following Dorm" to just be chalk full of stoners. Never let them know your next move! 🤙

Ruggie. He deserves it. Weirdly enough, he actually preforms better at his jobs when he's high as balls (this is based on one of my brother's. He can't drive for shit but he can smoke a blunt and then suddenly he turns into a chauffeur???)

Jade. I don't think he would need it or even really feel a desire to do it; he just wanted to know what it felt like the first time he did it, but then Yuu shotgunned him once and now he's much more willing to smoke. Probably makes the best food ever when he's high

Jamil. Look me in my eye and tell me he doesn't need Marijuana like a white mom needs a live laugh love sign. You cant. He can't do it too much though cause whenever he gets high he ends up just. Melting into his floor and stares at the ceiling for the next few hours and he can't do shit.

Kalim. He wants to be included. Also I think he would be a crier cause Lord knows he needs a good sob

Epel. He'll do just about anything if he thinks it'll make him cooler, and in his mind, weed is pretty cool. It is significantly less cool when he starts coughing like he's trying to puke out his organs though.

Vil. I don't really know why, he just would. He wouldn't smoke it though. Probably just eat an edible, and not the normal ones like a brownie or a cookie or some type of sweet, nah. He's going for the peanut butter. "Vil why is your peanut butter green?" "It's made with pistachios" "Ok but why are your eyes so red" "it's windy out here". He's so good at lying through his teeth when it comes to this but come on! He needs a break! Let him do this or he's gonna bite neiges head off!

I dont think Rook would. I don't why for this either, it's just the vibes. Rook is staying sober.

Idia tried it once to see what the hype was about and started choking. He's one if those people who isn't affected by Marijuana so he didn't really do it again. Until those cotton candy vapes came out and then he tried it again.

Lilia. I don't think I have to explain this.

Yuu. They were the one that got everyone else smoking. The probably grow it in their garden and tell people it's mint (also inspired by my brother). They're stressed constantly and making out with their boyfriend doesn't always take that stress away, so why not make out with their boyfriend, but high.

Honorable mention: Sam! He's just cool like that.

Honorable mention: Chen'ya! Cause I feel like he would.

I know nothing about smoking weed because the smell makes me kind of sick so I will take your word for it that this list is accurate. I do know a decent bit about drinking vodka straight from the bottle so allow me to give you my list of people who I think would do that:

Crewel- i think he's a cocktail guy but sometimes he just doesn't have the patience. He also has a big bottle of absinthe for emergencies. It's been getting a work out with all the overblots this year.

Lilia- used to back when he was traveling the world, nowadays he prefers not to so he can set a good example for Silver. Probably sticks to weed since it's more natural

Floyd- I feel like he makes those toxic jungle juice mixes that you can't tell the alcohol content of for "funzies" but then refuses to drink it himself and just drinks it from the bottle.

Epel- again he thinks it makes him look cool. He hates vodka because as a proud citizen of Harveston he strikes me as more of a cider guy but he still assumes he looked cool.

Sebek- he did it on a dare and he hated every second of it.

Ruggie- he does the thing where he gets cheap vodka and puts it through a brita filter to make it better.

Leona- he is too lazy to get himself something better. Do you think he smokes weed or sticks to catnip? And if you asked him that how loud do you think he would laugh before trying to beat your ass?

Yuu- at all times they look like this to me:

[prettyboykatsuki]

fang stop i was JUST thinking abt him ☹️☹️

in my head i’m really thinking about where you’ve been seeing each other for a very small amount of time. and barou doesn’t date unless he sees a future with someone but he also has enough tact to pace things out and you’re both pretty young

and like. you honestly don’t know if he would be a good dad. he is an excellent partner but fatherhood is a different thing so you’re mentally preparing yourself for the worst outcome.

his first question is if you want the baby. you are the most important thing. and then when you say yes he’s like. alright. when do you want to get married.

the whole thing is very efficient to a point it seems unromantic but logistically it’s just that barou doesn’t want the press to call you names and they can’t if you have a ring on your finger

so you get married in a month, and then you have your baby - and it’s a boy. barou very obviously wanted girls so u r once again nervous. he’s very silent and sober during the whole thing, and then you wake up in the middle of the night mumbling to your kid about cleaning the house when he’s older and u know it’s gonna be fine

barou is an exceptionally good father. he’s attentive and a little strict with your son but also supports him wholeheartedly in a way that is deeply tender. he raises him to be kind of chivalrous and i think your son goes through a rebellion thing in his teen years and it’s the first time you’ve seen him cry in years

you have two girls too i think - and barou spoils them to hell but so does their brother. barou is head of house but everything that goes by him goes through you first.

he’s just a really good dad in a weird way. he’s self absorbed but his kids are like extensions of him so he has high standards and a high view of them. i don’t think there’s a point in your children’s life they believe they are incapable of something because he just instill so much independence and confidence in them

and i think he’s actually closest with your son. they bicker jokingly but you’ve seen them spend hours outside talking about this and that and your son calls him something fond. pops or old man kr something

also mother’s day is a massive ordeal until you’re dead ahsjfns.

idk. he has a really specifically traditional way of raising children but at the same time perceives them to be of such high stature simply because they’re your kids. he is so so good to them

[necrotic-nephilim]

jaybrusteph. steph and bruce fuck on jason's grave, jason and bruce fuck on stephanie's grave, steph and jason fucking on bruce's grave. threesome where stephanie gets 2 cocks up her ass. they keeo her tied up in a secret part of the cave fir a week with a vibrator on her clit at low vibration and a fuck machine pounding her ass. they share her for another week straight and by the end of it she's mentally checked out and her face id smeared with mascara and cum. maybe they bring cass over once, and all of steph's holes are occupied at the same time. i want her to keep cumming so hard she walks with a limp for a month. she goes on patrol with a butt plug holding in both of their loads. remote controlled vibrators. just the kinkiest shit possible with these 3. any time bruce and jason fight, they take it out on steph. they both try to fuck her mouth and she chips a tooth and dislocates her jaw but they keep going

i've been thinking about this for *days*. bc idk how you intended this anon, but to me it reads as *delightful* non-con and *super* fucked up with grooming vibes. like in my head, i picture it as Bruce dealt with enough problems when Jason came back from death and he *really* doesn't feel like doing a repeat. so when Steph comes back, even if Babs gives her blessing for Steph to be Batgirl, Bruce doesn't trust it and he definitely doesn't like the idea of Steph wearing a Bat. he's been down this road before and this time, he's not making the same mistakes.

so he tells her she's allowed to be Batgirl but this time, there are more Rules. maybe he had a thing with her when she was Robin but Bruce feels like he obviously wasn't strict enough so, he sets new rules this time around. and Steph has no choice but to agree bc she wants to be Batgirl, she feels like she needs to prove herself again.

i love the idea of the mindbreak the first few weeks, too. esp if there are aphrodisiacs or some kind of drugs involved to keep her in a haze where it's all she can think about until she rlly just. breaks. and is okay with it and has no concept how fucked up it is. Bruce invites Jason just because he'll try anything to pacify Jason at this point, and maybe he had a fucked up thing with Jason already and they needed a sub as a buffer.

i also think it's fun if patrolling and missions are the one place Steph has an escape from all the sexual control. so she really leans into being Batgirl bc it's all she has so when they start making her wear plugs and vibrators out it breaks her a little bit. even as Batgirl, her life will revolve around pleasing Jason and Bruce. and Bruce is telling her that she has no idea how much she's helping with this, he's showing her numbers about how Red Hood has been much less lethal since this all started to really get in her head about how this is a duty and it's a favor that she's doing for Bruce and he's so thankful for it, he almost convinces her that she agreed to this somewhere along the way. so she agrees and is submissive when Jason is getting rougher and rougher with her until joints are dislocating and she's crying and doesn't even have the words to ask for it to stop so she can get a breather.

also like the idea of Bruce and Jason arguing while Steph is on a patrol and it's Jason who finds Steph first and without any sort of warning forces some kind of aphrodisiac drug into her mouth and makes her swallow, calmly telling her she has about an hour before it'll kick in so she better wrap up whatever she's doing and hope she gets to Jason's base so he doesn't have to find her and fuck her wherever she ends up when it kicks in-

and all the bruises and injuries she gets from the sex are explained away by vigilante work. i'm also really into the idea of like, gradual body modification without her awareness or consent. constantly having her on muscle relaxers so it's easier to fuck her without prep. adjusting parts of her body with supplements to their likings until she realizes she doesn't really recognize herself in the mirror. her nose has been broken by sex so many times it stoped healing right. her hips are a different size and she has to wear a plug most of the time bc she's usually so loose. just like. Complete Bodily Control over her, yk? and by the time she realizes how fucked up it is, she's in way too deep.

and pulling Cass into it is *really* fun bc Cass is someone she trusts. so if Cass is okay with this, leaning into it and fucking her mouth with a strap while stroking her hair, then it must be okay. bc it's Cass. and maybe Cass is also fucked up, maybe Cass is just trying to provide Steph comfort in a situation she can't get Steph out of. both are good options esp if Steph doesn't know which it is. she never knows if ppl just don't care enough to notice what she's going through or if Bruce and Jason are doing such a good job of hiding it all that they can't see it. and she gets so Stolkholm'd by the end of it there's no escape she even wants. bc it's not like she can go back to normal. it's not like she could come from regular sex that doesn't hurt to the point she cries anymore. so she just. accepts it.

but yk that's just my hurt/no comfort braincell being evil. bc i am evil and i love the psychology of being sexually broken as much as i love the sexual aspect of it. i think it makes it so much crunchier and realistic if there's this haunting acceptance that isn't necessarily a "oh she loves it now" but more of a "she knows escaping will make her feel worse" sort of thing. like she sees Bruce and Jason arguing and just starts to brace for it instead of trying to break them up. it's good food.

[hisui-dreamer]

I saw the recent request from skinny lector, I loved it, I felt identified, idk if it's not much, I could request the same but with my favs lilia, jamil, vil and rook, when skinny lector fem would like to be more voluptuous (like more curves kdjsj) but because of her metabolism she can't gain weight and this frustrates her :(( , tenks ૮꒰ ˶• ༝ •˶꒱ა ♡

his unwavering support

Characters: Lilia, Jamil, Vil, Rook

Synopsis: Your body's metabolism can be frustrating, but at least he's right here to support you.

Tags: body image issues, comfort, fluff, bot proofread

Word count: 813

Notes: as always, i hope everyone can be happy and comfortable in their own skin and body!

Part 1 ✧ Masterlist

he thinks it's a human thing, but he's very supportive nonetheless

he finds you perfect in all ways, and really it's your spirit that has captivated him

but he'd encourage you to be what you want to be

this old fae is just happy to see you happy

and he's extra ready to help you by making sure you're eating enough nutrients of course!

he's raised silver, and now he'll take good care of you too!

but the recipes always seen rather lacking...

no worries, he'll just add more nutrients!

don't pay heed to the ominous smell and colour, it's totally not edible!

yeahh maybe you shouldn't let him make food for you

still he'll be all the more willing to support you

he'll pop in at random hours of the day to see if you're hungry, and thankfully he'll give you ready made snacks

just, for your sake, don't eat his cooking

"Beastie! There you are." Lilia rushes up to you with a basket in hand. "I have prepared a dish for us to share. Please, do give it a try. I promise it's not as bad as it looks," he beams, but the less than pleasant smell is more than enough for you to doubt his words.

Jamil is very understanding and supportive of your insecurities

he truly loves you for who you are, and he couldn't be more grateful that you love him

but he understands that's just how insecurities work and he'd try his best to help you

he's a great listener, so he's always here to lend you an ear if you feel the need to rant

ever the practical and mindful thinker, he'd also offer practical advice on, life habits, diets, and even self-confidence tips

if you like his cooking, he's all the more willing to cook for you

always extends an invitation to you to kalim's banquets

and he makes sure to save a portion for you to eat later, so when you eventually get hungry, he can easily heat it up and serve it to you

keeps snacks on him at all times just in case you're suddenly hungry

all in all, he’s very accommodating and he’ll adapt to your every need

"Ya amar, is the food to your liking?" Jamil asks, reaching over with a napkin to gently wipe your cheek of sauce. At your nod, he smiles contentedly. "I'm glad, take your time and eat slowly, there's plently more left." He says as he starts eating his own plate.

he understands what it feels like to want to change yoruself

he himself has worked incredibly hard to achieve his own desired physique

but definitely emphasizes self-acceptance and confidence regardless of physical appearance

he'll love you regardless for who you are, even better when you're happy and confident in your own skin

he'll encourage you to work hard towards your goals

makes use of his knowledge on diets and nutrition, high protein smoothies!

once you've set yourself realistic goals, he'll be there every step of the way to make sure you're not slacking off

beware, he's a strict coach once he's invested

when he sees you in school, he'll chastise you on eating your meals and staying hydrated properly

you will not hurt your body to pursue your ideals, absolutely not on his watch

he'll sprinkle in bits of affection here and there to keep you motivated, so keep at it!

"Darling, I don't want you to feel like you have to change yourself. You are perfect just the way you are," Vil says, before laying a sweet peck on your forehead. "No one else would ever be worthy of being my lover, please know that." His breath tickles your forehead.

Rook finds beauty in anything and everything, but he can't deny he has a bias towards you

he'll genuinely be confused, but he's careful about asking you to elaborate your insecurities

he would never want to hurt your feelings

he definitely he waxes poetry about your beauty

he can be a little bit dramatic, but he means well

but man, he could go on for days about how your smile sends butterflies to his stomach

it's kind of a, he won't shut up about it so you'll have to accept his compliments

all the while, he’ll still support you whenever you need though

he understands that this is what you want, and he’ll be there for you every step of the way

literally

stalking showing up randomly throughout the day to make sure his beloved is doing well

your huntsman is… very devoted

"Mon chou, you are beautiful just the way you are. Beauty is not just about shape or size. It's the inner essence that makes a person shine. I am fascinated by everything that you are, and I hope that you can find the same joy within yourself. Je suis là pour toi, toujours."

Part 1 ✧ Masterlist

if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!

[bluemoonsunrise]

Demons and Savages

pairing: tsu’tey and human!avatar driver (fem presenting)

content warnings: graphic language, violence, alien vs human differences, awkward friendship?, tension, angst, vulgarity. (also, i don’t like to capitalize sentences on tumbler :3)

word count: …idk :D

pov: 2nd person so you can add yourself in. for writing/plot purposes, your character is named eris ramsey. i’ll use the name sparingly but i can’t take myself seriously writing y/n— so please just work with me here. i promise it’ll be worth it. (i hope)

< previous chapter

———🌌———

SUMMARY: earth was dying and your sister was, too, but cancer killed her faster than humans were killing earth. when she passed, she not only left behind an empty apartment full of memories but a billion dollar avatar without a driver. in a desperate attempt to not waste that money, the program she had spent the last five years preparing to join recruited you— her twin. of course, you agreed. there was nothing left on earth for you. there was nothing left on earth for anyone— that’s why people like your sister were sent off to pandora.

when your sister had spoken of pandora, it seemed like a dream.

the RDA promised it would be like a safari adventure.

truth was that pandora is beautiful. beautiful and unlike anything else across the whole of the universe. it is breathtaking— and that’s because what chases you through the forest hunts with the intent to kill; so you best run like hell even if your lungs are on fire. beasts and monsters of all kinds lurk out of sight waiting for the right moment to kill you dead— but none are as dangerous as him.

the blue shadow with the bow.

chapter two

— cowboy —

you should have linked to your avatar body sooner. the morning had nearly passed by the time you opened your eyes and stirred in your hammock. when you rose, he was waiting.

he had been waiting.

for hours.

anger made him look volatile. his tail flicked behind him as he watched you climb out from your hammock. you nearly tripped over your own feet trying to rub the daze of shifting into this larger, still-stiff body from your eyes.

“i’m sorry…” you said as you approached. you dipped your head and signed, ‘i see you’ to him. when his demeanor did not change, you swallowed around the lump in your throat. “really, i’m sorry. i don’t have much control over when i can and can’t be connected to my body.”

tsu’tey flicked his head and you knew to start marching.

he was kind enough to have saved you breakfast. dried fruits and nuts. you picked at them within the pouch he stored them in as you walked through the forest together. you offered him some as an attempt at making peace. to your surprise, he took a handful and poured them into his mouth. it was silent as you walked.

well, not for very long.

you had a bad habit of blabbering when tension arose— and you could feel the negativity radiating off him like the old story of chernobyl you knew about.

“how long have you been up for?” you asked, shooting a glance his way.

tsu’tey popped more pieces of dried fruit into his mouth and grunted. “sunrise.”

guilt made your stomach hurt.

“i really am sorry. i hope you understand that there is a strict schedule i follow. if i don’t, i risk killing myself. water? food? sleep? it’s all stuff my real body needs, too.” you said.

“i am not angry you are late, skxawng. i care not for what you do. im angry my day revolves around you. why i must be the one to teach you is not something i am happy with. i have other tasks i would rather see to. hunting. training warriors who are soon to pass their iknimaya.” tsu’tey said gruffly, not bothering to look at you.

your expression soured and you scowled at him. “you can teach me to be a warrior, too.”

“ha,” tsu’tey laughed. a real laugh. it lit up his face and made his ears perk up. he looked at you and shook his head. “you really are a skxawng.”

“eywa may have given me a sign not to shoot you down with my bow but it changes nothing. i see what you truly are, demon, even with all your practiced knowledge.”

“you are not real.”

you could only stare at him. your throat went dry. your heart shuddered in your chest. your voice was no where to be found— but what could ever be said to that?

nothing. because he was right.

“then why bother with all this?”

tsu’tey turned, stopping dead in his tracks. his tail flicked. “what?”

“why did you save me from the nantang?” you asked outright. you swallowed the fruit you had in your mouth with trouble and tried to keep your chin up. “if you know what i am, why bother saving me? you could’ve let me get torn apart. it wouldn’t have been you who killed me. no blame on you. why did you save me?”

tsu’tey let his shoulders drop. when he met your eyes, he looked at you. into you.

“eywa did not want you dead,” he said. his voice was too soft. he sounded like an entirely different person. a hopeless believer. “the atokirina landed on my arrowhead before it floated down to you. it kept me from firing that shot. it was a sign. you were to live.”

“when it floated around you, i knew what the great mother expected of me when the nantang attacked you.” tsu’tey said as he approached.

you stiffened as he stood in front of you. you had to tilt your head back to see him clearly. “and what…what is it that she expected?”

you winced when he grabbed your hand even though it didn’t hurt. not in the slightest. he touched your extra finger. he fought a scowl, his face twitching. he looked into your eyes and — for a second time — he was staring into you.

“i am to protect you…” tsu’tey muttered. he almost rolled his eyes as a heavy sigh escaped him. “it has been decided by eywa and by the tsahik. eywa is greater than my feelings. the great mother is greater than our differences. demon or not, you have been chosen for something and it is my job to make sure you don’t kill yourself, skxawng.”

“i— i’ve been chosen for something? what?” you asked, grasping his hand. you needed answers. you needed to know all that he knew.

tsu’tey pulled his hand from yours and shook it at his side as if it burned. his scowl returned with vengeance. it twisted his face in a way that was all too familiar. you almost preferred his scowl. you expected his harshness. you had no idea what to make of his gentler voice and softened features.

“i do not know.” tsu’tey said. his voice was tight in his throat. his tail flicked behind him. “i am not capable of interpreting eywa’s will. i am only a warrior.”

“and i can make you one, too, if that is what you wish to be.”

you looked up at him. your ears and tail betrayed you. your tail wouldn’t stay still and your ears stood at attention. excitement tickled your belly.

“really?” you asked, almost bracing yourself for a sudden change in his heart.

tsu’tey grunted and looked away. “it serves as a better use of my time teach you how to fight and hunt rather than help you string beads and teach you how to sing.”

“and if i choose to be a singer?” you asked, raising one of your eyebrows.

“then there are many songs for you to learn, demon,” tsu’tey said with a shake of his head. “but you will learn to ride pa’li. that is essential.”

if he hadn’t tried it so intently then maybe you would’ve missed it. perhaps more subconsciously to him, he tried to raise only one of his hairless eyebrows. it had you biting your lip as to not smile.

you nodded once, placing your hands on your hips. “let’s get started then.”

he took you to the riverbank. the sun was warm. insects buzzed by your head and skimmed across the surface of the water. fish leapt out from the river to catch them. direhorses ate the sweet vegetation that grew by the waterside.

“damn,” you whispered as tsu’tey guided one of the massive direhorses towards you. you took a step back as it stomped one of its feet when he tugged it to halt. “no saddle?”

“you have legs.” he said with a glance towards your thighs. “you will use them to hold on.”

“i don’t know if you know this, buddy, but this body has only ever been in use like four times now. i’m going to fall off.” you said.

“then you get back on.” tsu’tey said with a single flick of his head toward the direhorse.

you swallowed a bit of your pride as he grunted for you to get a move on. you had to raise your arm up high to reach its back. the leather of its skin was tough. it was a tall, powerful creature you knew would buck you off within a second.

“now, demon.” tsu’tey hissed.

“alright, alright…” you cringed a bit and tried your best to steel your spine. with you best foot forward, you tried to swing yourself up.

“bad try.” tsu’tey shook his head and nudged you out of the way. “watch how i do.”

he wrapped his arm around the tendril that hung down by the direhorses neck. with a quickness you wouldn’t be able to replicate anytime soon, he swung himself up onto the direhorses back.

you rolled your eyes. “you should’ve told me to grab that from the beginning.”

“again.” tsu’tey said as he slid down off the direhorses back. he ignored your comment. “this time, do like i did.”

you exhaled a sharp, fast breath. annoyance pinned your ears back. reaching up, you hooked an arm around one of the tendrils just as he had. with all the strength you could, you tried to pull yourself up.

that just pissed off the direhorse and it stomped it’s feet, huffing and snorting.

“you need to swing.” tsu’tey said. he tapped his stomach. “strong belly and swing your legs up. do not use your arms to pull until your belly is tight and you’ve swung your legs.”

“watch.” he nudged you out of the way.

this time, you really watched his form. you watched the way he grasped the tether as a stationary point but swung himself up. he had taken two steps to build momentum. two steps, swing up, mount.

easy enough, yeah?

“momentum. momentum.” you muttered yourself as you grasped the direhorses tether again.

you took a breath and felt it. your core tightened as you geared up to take those steps and swing yourself up. step, step, swing— except you choked. when your leg didn’t quite get up over the side, you bailed entirely and nearly fell flat on your face.

he grabbed your arm and kept you steady.

your ears fell flat as you met his eyes. you could see the scowl threaten to curl on his lips. you braced yourself for harsh words and hisses.

“better.” he said.

your ears perked up.

“swinging yourself with great force is the only way to mount pa’li. you must take larger steps to make that swing.” tsu’tey said.

you nodded. “yeah, i need more momentum.”

“momen…what?” he narrowed his eyes and titled his head.

“momentum,” you said again, clearer this time. you demonstrated the swing you needed to do with your hands. “momentum. the swing. you get it?”

“momentum.” tsu’tey said, watching your lips as your mouth formed the word. his accent was so thick it seemed to get in the way of his tongue. “yes, it is that. you just make more momentum.”

“but how? i mean, i tried doing the same amount of steps as you but it’s the height that’s throwing me off.” you said, looking up at the direhorse.

“pa’li is tall but you are tall, too. try to step, jump, swing.” tsu’tey said. he crossed his arms against his chest and watched.

you shook out the tension in your shoulders. step, jump, swing. his brows pinched together as he watched you take a few steps back. you gave yourself a running start and jumped, pushing yourself up with your arms.

his hands curled around your waist and he pulled you off before you could swing yourself on.

“hey!” you exclaimed, struggling in his grasp.

“wrong.” he placed you down and turned you toward him. “in order to ride, you must make tsaheylu. a bond. in order to make that bond, you must hold the tether. first step, you must hold the tether.”

“jumping on pa’li like that is a waste of time. it is not faster. bad habit. break it. do not do it again.” he instructed.

“alright, alright…” you said softly, holding up your hands.

“strong belly, demon.” he reminded you.

“yeah, i got it. thanks.”

you huffed under your breath as you wrapped your arm around the tether. standing back nearer towards its face, you would be able to run and swing yourself up— and that’s exactly what you tried to do. you ran, kept your core tight, swung your leg up, and mounted the direhorse.

“hey!” you gasped, pupils blown wide as you look down at him. “i did it!”

he was fighting a grin whilst stood at your side. patting the direhorses neck, he kept the beast calm. he looked up at you and nodded once. you could see in his eyes what he did not say.

well done, demon.

“again.” tsu’tey said, pulling you off the direhorse.

“woah!” you hooked your arms around his neck and fell into his arms. as he set you on your feet, you looked up at him. “you are so handsy.”

“i don’t know what that means.” he said as he let you go. his lip curled and he stared down his nose at you.

he thought you were insulting him.

“handsy. y’know, touchy.” you said. for show, you glided your hand along his chest and gripped his bicep in the other. “you touch me a lot.”

tsu’tey huffed and nudged your hands away. “if i don’t touch, you will hurt yourself. i’m making sure you do not injure yourself, skxawng.”

“skxawng. you keep calling me that. what does it mean?” you asked with annoyance lacing your voice. judging by the way he called you demon, you knew it couldn’t be good.

“means you are slow.” tsu’tey said. he flicked your forehead. “in here, you are slow.”

your eyes widened and your mouth popped open. “you’re calling me a moron!”

tsu’tey bared his teeth in a sharp smile. “you act like one.”

“you are such a jackass.” you huffed under your breath.

ignoring the way he chuckled, you once again tried to mount the direhorse. you didn’t keep your core tight enough. you stumble and it bumped you with its hip. the poor thing must’ve been annoyed with you by this point. you were annoyed with yourself— annoyed with him most of all.

on the second try, you swung yourself up onto the direhorses back. tsu’tey came to your side. he nodded at you as you met his eyes. you’d gotten the hang of it. with more practice you’d be able to do it with ease.

“now it is time for you to make tsaheylu.” he said.

tsaheylu. the bond. you knew of it. you’d read about it in grace augustine’s book before they shipped you out to pandora. it was how all living things on pandora connected to one and other. it is how all living things connected to eywa.

“take your kuru and make tsaheylu.” tsu’tey said, guiding the direhorses tether up toward you.

you reached behind your head and pulled your braid over your shoulder. queue. kuru. so many names for it. but there was only one name for the bond you were about to make.

the white spindles twisted and extended at the end of your braid. so did the direhorses at the end of its tether-like queue. as you guided your kuru forward, pinkish-white spindles linked and overlapped as you made tsaheylu.

your pupils blew and your body went rigid. you could hear mighty breath and a strong beating heart. you could feel legs that were not your own.

tsu’tey placed his hand on your thigh. you looked down at him, unaware that you were panting. he nodded once. calm. collected.

“breathe,” tsu’tey said lowly. he ran his hand across your thigh, up your waist, to your belly. “deep. slow. feel her breath and match it.”

you closed your eyes and focused on the way the direhorse inhaled and exhaled. it was much harder to do when his hand was on your belly.

his hand was warm…

in and out.

you focused on that and that alone.

breathing in deep and letting it all out.

“feel her strong legs.” tsu’tey said.

those you could feel without having to try. as she stepped back and forth, you could feel the power within them. fast. faster than horses on earth ever could’ve been. this direhorse had more legs than them. a larger set of lungs. a larger heart.

“when you are ready, think ‘run.’” tsu’tey said as he stepped back.

“run?” you repeated.

the direhorse ran— and you fell straight into the mud.

a soft groan escaped you. the whole left side of your face was mud caked. his shadow blocked out the sun and you heard him sigh.

“a mistake every first rider makes.” tsu’tey said as you pushed yourself up. “you will try again. this time, you will hold on.”

“thanks for the advice.” you huffed, hitting him with your muddy shoulder as you walked by.

mounting the direhorse became easier each time you did it— and you did it over and over again because you could not stay on the creatures back for long. you fell into the mud each and every time you willed the direhorse to run.

tsu’tey brought you to the riverbed not only because it is where the direhorses liked to graze but because the mud cushioned your falls.

“you are not holding on.” tsu’tey said as he pulled you up from the mud.

“i am!” you exclaimed. your frustration was reaching its boiling point and you pulled your arm from his grasp. “how much tighter do i have to grip the damn tethers it has?”

“you are not holding on here.” tsu’tey said, smacking your thigh.

you scowled at him and swatted at his hand. “don’t.”

“you must squeeze your legs, skxawng.” tsu’tey said with a shake of his head. “you cannot stay in place on the back of pa’li if you do not squeeze your thighs.”

“fine. fine.” you huffed and turned away. “i get it. tight core. squeeze my legs.”

“try.”

you looked back at him as he grabbed your waist. your eyes widened as he tugged you towards him. your jaw dropped as he wedged his leg in between your thighs.

“what the fuck are you doing?!” you cursed at him, pushing your arm into his chest.

“squeeze.” tsu’tey commanded.

you laughed in his face. “oh, you’re funny.”

“do as i say, skxawng.”

you had to grit your teeth. chest to chest with him, you had little options. everything he had instructed you to do so far and every correction he made had not led you astray. it bruised your pride to do as you were told.

you squeezed your thighs together, squishing his thigh between your legs. you looked anywhere but at him. he did the same as his hands framed your waist. he rocked his leg from side to side.

“pa’li are fast and they are strong. you must be strong, too, to ride. your legs will tire but falling hurts more.” tsu’tey said softly. he looked down between you both. “you must squeeze harder. i am able to move my leg back and forth without you. squeeze until you are moving as i move.”

looking down, you squeezed your thighs together tighter. you had to grit your teeth. as he moved his leg side to side, yours were glued to him. squeezing his thigh, you moved as he moved. when he dipped to the left, you had no choice but to follow. when he tried to move his thigh upward, the tension in your legs gave the right amount of resistance so that he could not throw you off.

“do you see now?” tsu’tey asked as he met your eyes. he tried to buck his thigh again and could not. not with you squeezing him so tight. “tsaheylu makes you one with pa’li in the mind. you must make yourself one with pa’li like this. strong core. strong legs. strong hips.”

“i get it,” you said softly, ignoring the burn in your face and the tickle in your belly that came with being so close to him.

tsu’tey tapped your thigh and you let him go. he took a step back and flicked his head. “try again. don’t fall this time, demon.”

you dipped your head.

mounting the direhorse, you were quick to make the bond. feel her breath. feel her heart. feel her legs. you wrapped the tethers around your arms and kept a firm grip. at the same time, you squeezed your legs tight around the direhorses sides.

“run,” you thought.

and the direhorse heard you.

with legs that sounded like thunder as they hit the ground, the direhorse ran. you kept your grip tight and your thighs clenched even tighter. gritting your teeth, you held on as the wind whipped across your face. the direhorse ran a lap around the riverbed as it had been trained to do— and you only fell off at the end when you simply could not hold on any longer.

you spit out the mud that had gotten in your mouth. pushing yourself up, you saw him grinning. a soft sigh escaped you. such sweet relief it was to see something other than a scowl after giving it the best shot you had all day.

“we are finished for today.” tsu’tey said as you neared. he picked a twig out of your hair. “you did better than i thought you would. tomorrow it will be easier. clean yourself up in the river.”

the cold river water embraced you like a lover and soothed the ache in your muscles. it washed away the mud caked onto your skin and the sweat that beaded on your hairline and dripped down your back.

you could feel his gaze linger on you as you washed.

and you ignored the way it made you feel.

— 🌌 —

the next day was by no means easier.

nor way the day after that.

or the day after that.

bruises made your blue skin purple. they littered your thighs. your arms. your back. you took the falls like a champ when they happened, but crawling in and out of your hammock each day could not be done without a groan.

until it did get easier.

you could mount your direhorse with ease. mitsia was her name. each time you made tsaheylu, the more your bond deepened. she grew accustomed to you. she did not jostle as much. she did not run so recklessly. she would greet you each morning with a bump of her nose.

you could ride longer and longer each day— and one day you stopped falling all together. leaving the riverbank behind, you rode with tsu’tey through the forest. learning to hold on as mitsia leapt over fallen logs was not as difficult as you imagined it would be. keeping your core tight and your legs secure, you moved as she moved. it became second nature.

it became second nature, too, to compete with tsu’tey as you mastered the art of riding.

“c’mon, cowboy! you’re eating my dust!” you laughed over your shoulder as the two of you raced back to home tree.

he smirked.

racing through the forest, you stole glances at each other as the direhorses below you ran. mitsia and karuk — tsu’tey’s pa’li — had grown accustomed to each other, too. like their riders, they competed to get home first. mitsia’s heart pounded and her breath came hard as fast as she tried to out run karuk.

the male direhorse was older and his legs were longer. when tsu’tey crouched and tucked himself downward to be more aerodynamic, the race was already won.

“i will beat you tomorrow, jackass.” you said as you swung yourself off mitsia. you gave her a gentle pat before joining beside tsu’tey.

“no, not tomorrow. we are finished training with pa’li. you have mastered riding.” tsu’tey said with a glance your way. as you walked inside home tree, the smell of pandoran barbecue made your stomach grumble.

“what’s next then?” you asked.

“you have yet to decide if being a hunter is what you want. tomorrow, you rest and decide.” tsu’tey said.

you watched as he departed. instead of heading up the center column, he made his way towards the olo’eyktan. he bowed his head and signed ‘i see you’ before sitting down beside him. you knew what they were discussing. each day, tsu’tey gave a report about how you were fairing to the olo’eyktan.

you cleaned yourself up before dinner. re-doing some of the braids in your hair, you thought about what tsu’tey had said.

you had yet to decide on what you truly want to be.

you knew you didn’t want to be a singer. you didn’t have the confidence it took to preform. you enjoyed riding and you enjoyed being in the forest, but you didn’t know if you had what it took to be a powerful hunter.

on earth, you hadn’t done more than wait on costumers and clean up messes that they left behind. hunters didn’t scrape gum off the undersides of tables or have to clean matted grease off deep fryers. they were masters with a bow and quick with a knife.

each day that you went to bed and woke up back in the link-pod, you felt less and less uncertain.

uncertain about what you wanted.

uncertain about who you were.

surrounded by scientists, you were not as smart as them. you could help grace log her findings but you couldn’t offer anything more than clicking buttons on the computer. you weren’t fluent in navi like norm. you weren’t as physically capable as jake was when he was in his avatar body.

jake was military.

norm was a scholar.

grace was a scientist.

you were just the replacement for a dead genius.

a blank slate.

that thought stuck with you like a nagging itch as you climbed the center column of home tree and made your way to your usual eating spot. the more you tried to ignore it, the worse it became.

you were a blank slate in a world ripe with opportunity and that had to mean something.

you had few skills.

that meant you could learn hundreds of new ones.

you had poor navi.

that gave you room to improve with those who spoke it fluently and hadn’t learned it out of a book.

you had no muscle.

that meant you could only grow stronger.

in a program full of bright minds and strong spirits, only one of you sat in home tree— and only one of you had been chosen by eywa.

it had not been grace.

It had not been norm.

it had not been jake.

it had been you. you had a purpose on pandora. a purpose that surpassed what you knew about tree roots or how many pull-ups you could do.

if you wanted to be a hunter— you would learn.

and he would each you how. just like he taught you to ride a direhorse in nine days.

“what is it that you had called me today, demon?” tsu’tey asked as he sat across from you. “when we raced through the forest.”

you couldn’t help but smile. “a cowboy.”

“cowboy…” he picked up a bug from the pile on his leaf and cracked the shell with his teeth. he pulled out the soft meaty inside and ate it. “what does that mean? cowboy.”

“a cowboy is a man who rides a horse and deals with herding animals. they wear hats and boots. on earth, cowboys were seen most in the western part of america.” you said as you picked at the food. you hadn’t gotten used to bugs yet. it was their many, many legs that creeped you out.

when he didn’t respond right away, you looked up. it was clear to see that most — if not all — of what you said had been lost to his ears. again, you smiled.

“on earth, cowboys rode pa’li. they were like hunters, except they kept the animals close together in herds. in a big group that they would move from place to place.” you said, choosing your words more carefully.

“they were also like warriors, too. the word is vigilante. it means that they took the law into their own hands and punished those who broke it.”

“is there no olo’eyktan to answer to?” tsu’tey asked, his invisible brows knitting together.

“no,” you said with a small laugh. carefully, you bit into a bug and chewed. it didn’t taste bad. it was good. smoky in flavor— but the legs still gave you the heebie-jeebies. “on earth, instead of clans there are countries. millions and millions of people live in a single country alone. and there are hundreds of countries.”

“millions of people…” tsu’tey looked around the crowded dinner place and then back at you. “and that is more than navi here in home tree?”

“so many more. unimaginable.” you said with a shake of your head. you popped the shell of another bug and tried to explain it as easy to understand as you could. “let’s use you as an example. you know everyone in your clan, yes?”

“yes.” he nodded.

“right. in a country on earth, you’d never be able to meet every person who lives in that country. there are too many people. it would be like if all the clans from sea to sea across the land we’re on now were one clan.” you tried to explain.

to your delight, he seemed to understand. his eyes were wider than they usually were. he let out a soft breath and shook his head, “and these cowboys…were there a lot of them?”

“in the past, yes. where i lived and in the time i lived, no. there aren’t enough animals on earth for cowboys to be useful. there are no more great plaines, either. no horses to ride. it’s all metal and machines.” you said with a small frown.

“is there no great mother on earth, too?” tsu’tey asked.

you shrugged. “if there was one then she died long before i was born.”

tsu’tey frowned. you could see the sympathy he held for you. his face was so expressive for someone so rough around the edges.

“how did you come here?” tsu’tey asked. the question was careful. it was as if he presented it to you in the palms of his hands and braced himself for rejection.

that was exactly what you gave him.

“i want to be a hunter.” you said outright. you pushed aside your leaf still full of food. you were no longer hungry. as you met his eyes, you nodded once. “i want to be a warrior like you and i want you to teach me.”

tsu’tey sat back. he narrowed his eyes at you and took in the whole of you. his eyes trailed from your head to your crossed legs. the bruises that decorated your body had yet to fade. being a hunter was a lot harder than being a direhorse rider. being a warrior was more dangerous than both.

“tomorrow you shall rest. that is decided. it is needed. the day after, i will teach you how to use a bow.” tsu’tey said.

heat rose to your face and your tail swayed wildly behind you. so wildly that you reached back to grab it. he hadn’t said no. he hadn’t laughed. he hadn’t called you a moron.

he would teach you.

he would mold you into a fierce warrior and a bountiful hunter because no student was better to teach than one who was a blank canvas.

“why do you look like that?” tsu’tey asked with a small scowl.

“huh? uh…” you were quick to let go of your tail. your ears pinned and you looked anywhere but at him. “i don’t know…i think im just surprised that you’re agreeing to let me become what you are. a warrior. a hunter. i figured you would’ve told me to start warming up my singing voice.”

tsu’tey laughed. a low, grunt-like laugh came out of his nose. as he picked apart a green-shelled bug, he smiled. “i told you once before, skxawng. if you want to be a hunter, i will make you a hunter. i don’t like singing. i would dislike you more if you had chosen to sing over shoot a bow.”

you couldn’t help but smile. “right…”

“you learn fast.” tsu’tey said without looking at you, “you are determined, too. you proved me wrong when you got back on mitsia after you kept falling off. i thought you would quit.”

“my only doubt left of you is that your body will give out on you.” he met your eyes and shook his head. “you are not true navi. it will be a very great test of your strength, demon, but if you are willing then i will teach you.”

“i am.” you said with a slow nod of your head. you looked into his eyes and kept your chin up. “i made my choice. i want to learn all that you know.”

tsu’tey seemed to savor your words. more than that, he savored the look in your eyes. he saw into you. he saw your resolve. it was as hard as steel.

on earth, you had been nothing.

on pandora, you would be exceptional.

“it is decided then.” tsu’tey said.

you smiled to yourself. you couldn’t help it. looking above, you took in as much detail of home tree as you could but there was only one picture in your mind.

his face.

over the last nine days, you had done well to keep up with him. so much so that you refused to quit even when you took a particularly bad fall off mitsia. you couldn’t let him know that it hurt. pride kept you stubborn— but the desire to see him proud burned hotter and hotter each time you tried.

tsu’tey was a good teacher. he was handsy and harsh, but he was the only person capable of teaching you. he could handle your stubbornness as well as you could handle his. while he scolded you and smacked you on the back of the head when you would do incredibly stupid and dangerous things, he was quick to congratulate and reward you, too.

not all his edges were rough.

most. but not all.

“here,” tsu’tey said. he tossed you a pouch as you climbed down into your hammock.

“what is this?” you asked.

sitting on your knees, you opened the pouch. dumping it into your hand, a palm-size carving of a direhorses fell out.

it was mitsia.

when you looked up to thank him, he was gone. the flap to his hanging hut closed as he disappeared inside.

you bit back a smile as you laid down in your hammock. holding up the carving, you admired the craftsmanship. for the last three days, you would wake to him sitting on the branch beside your hammock. he had been whittling something. wood chips would be piled beside him. he would be quick to tuck away his work and sheath his knife as you awoke.

in the morning hours you were not here, he carved as he watched you sleep without dreaming.

you kept the carving of your direhorse close to your chest as you laid back. closing you eyes, you wished to dream. in this body, you wanted to dream of thundering hooves and tsutey’s sharp smile.

the whirr of the link-pod greeted you. the hatch opened and the bright, white lights of the lab made your eyes burn. home tree at this hour was dark and quiet. the avatar lab was always busy. pushing yourself out of the pod, you rolled out the stiffness in your shoulders.

“long day again, huh?” norm turned in his chair as you passed by. he was studying slides under one of the microscopes. “what did he have you doing this time?”

“hey, no talking until after she logs.” grace said without bothering to look away from the computer she typed at. “detail the day while it’s fresh in your mind.”

“yeah, yeah…” you mumbled as you made your way over to a chair in the corner.

the blinking red light told you the tiny camera was recording you. that and the fact that you could see your face displayed on the screen as the time ticked by. you gave your name, your badge number, and the date before detailing the events of today. you hated logging. you hated sitting at that desk and recalling everything you’d done.

you hated it because it made you miss him.

the feeling was new to you. it crept up on you like a cold. each hour spent outside of your avatar had you growing sicker and sicker with the feeling.

the feeling of longing that came with wanting to be in home tree. wanting to wake up— really wake up in your hammock. being up early enough to eat breakfast with the clan.

with him.

you liked to argue with him. you could see the slight smile on your lips each time you spoke about him in your video logs. you hated that you smiled— but you couldn’t help it. apart from jake, tsu’tey was the only person you felt you had any kind of rapport with. he could be mean and calloused— but he was also the only person on this giant blue moon who spent any meaningful time with you.

jake kept you company at breakfast and dinner. he played card games with you before bed. he was easy to talk about human life to. you expressed your grief to him— as hard as it was — because he understood. he lost his brother like you had lost your sister. he, too, felt like an imposter in the avatar labs.

the bond you two shared was solid.

he could make you smile. he could make you laugh. he could make you cry. he could make you feel as though you did belong here in the RDA. he was a comforting presence that you hadn’t known you needed after the death of your sister had left a hole in your heart.

jake didn’t fill the hole— but he did a damn good job of making it hurt less.

tsu’tey was not your friend.

unlike jake, tsu’tey refused to be labeled as such— and yet he acted like one. he was a strict teacher. that much could not be denied. he worked you to the point of bruises…but at the same time, he consoled every hurt. he checked every bump. he tended to every scratch.

he may not have known you like jake knew you, but he spent the most time with you. he spent hours and hours alongside you. his days started and ended with you. teaching you. correcting you. yelling at you. bickering with you. teasing you. smiling at you.

jake knew your story.

he knew your heartache.

he knew your fears.

tsu’tey knew your hopes.

he knew your strength.

he knew your hunger for life.

in so many ways you couldn’t quite put into words, tsu’tey was the only one to know you. what you were. what you were capable of. what drove you. what focused you. what lit a fire under your ass. what strength you had in your heart.

on earth, you had been nothing. just another person on a dying planet. you had no plans because there were no plans to have. you had no money. not enough to be comfortable. not enough to find happiness. you had no family. sickness and poverty had withered them all away. with the death of your sister, you may as well have died, too.

on pandora, you had the chance to be anything you wanted to be. a warrior. a hunter. a singer. a scientist. a gardener. a solider. there were so many things you could be— yet you hardly knew who you were.

each day you got into that link-pod, it was a constant battle of which one was real.

which you was real?

you knew the version of you that could no longer exist. the girl from earth had died when her sister passed— and whoever emerged from the smog keeping you wilted was new. she was a stranger to everyone around her.

including you.

which is why you chose to be strong. if you could be anything on pandora, you would be strong. you would be brave. you would be kind.

who you chose to be was a mirror of the first person to look into your eyes and see you.

tsu’tey knew you better than anyone in this lab ever could because he watched you find yourself more and more within the forests of pandora.

you liked the sun. it felt good on your skin. you liked to swim in the river. it felt good to be weightless. you liked to ride and you liked to run. you liked to laugh. you liked to learn. you liked to try and try again when you failed.

while the avatar drivers you had been separated from on your first ground excursion worked on understanding the forest around them on a cellular, scientific level— you worked on understanding the forest on a personal level.

you scraped your knees on the forest floor. you climbed the towering trees. you formed tsaheylu with pa’li. you had been blessed by the atokirina.

grace saw the forest through the lens of a microscope while you saw the forest through his eyes.

“tsu’tey told me as we rode today that all energy is only borrowed. it is through that energy gifted by eywa that we are blessed to live long, fulfilling lives. when we die, we return that energy to her.” you said, rubbing your hand along your jaw. “i wonder if that applies to us demons…”

you smiled at the camera. “well, that’s about all. the same old same old. horses and riding. riding and horses. tsu’tey said that tomorrow is my rest day. i wonder what kind of trouble i’ll get myself into on a day like that.”

when the red light turned off, you sighed. rubbing your face, all you wanted was to go to bed but you couldn’t. you needed to eat and drink something. even though you had such recent memories of eating dinner in home tree that tricked your mind into thinking you were full— your stomach growled and gnawed at itself.

“hey, hot-shot.” you said as you sat down in the mess hall beside jake. he was already halfway done with his dinner.

“hey there, forest girl.” jake said with a grin. “you’re back pretty late again. get thrown off your horse at all today?”

“nah. i’ve got that horse-riding shit on lock down.” you said as you took a bite of your dinner. the food tasted weird. it always did. you tried your best to ignore it. “how was your day?”

“boring. all i do is stand around while grace and norm scurry around the woods together and put dirt into jars. i dunno how tommy found any of this shit interesting. i mean, pandora is awesome but the science work i see grace and norm do is like watching paint dry.” jake said with a sigh.

you laughed and frowned at him. “i wish you could come to home tree and spend a day with me and tsu’tey. i don’t think he’d like you very much, but at least it would be something for you to do. it would be like basic training but navi style.”

“i wish i could, too. im jealous that you get to spend your days running around in the woods while im stuck with the know-it-all’s. but i live vicariously through you in your stories.”

“is it fun?” jake asked. he smiled. “yknow, riding those big ass horses?”

you smiled, too. “so much fun. you’d love it. you’d be good at it. i bet you’d master it faster than me.”

jake offered to stay with you while you finished your dinner even though he’d finished first. you enjoyed his company. sitting together, you talked mindlessly about hobbies the two of you had. on earth, jake had liked to go to bars and gamble while you had liked to come home from work and rot in front of the tv. no matter what was on, you would watch it. any show. any movie. it didn’t matter what it was because all it was was an escape from the shithole you lived in and the dying world outside your window.

“excuse me, miss ramsey?”

you looked over your shoulder as your name was called. a solider dressed in camo stood with his arms behind his back.

“yeah?” you asked, raising one of your eyebrows.

“if you could follow me please, colonel quaritch wants to speak with you.”

you met jake’s eyes in time to see his brows raise. with a small flick of his head, he silently told you to get going. you got up form where you were sitting, cleared away your mess, and followed behind the solider. as you walked, you saw the corporal insignia on his uniform.

“in here.” the corporal said, pushing open a set of double doors. “sit tight. he’ll be here shortly.”

the doors shut with an eery silence as the corporal left you alone. you’d been in this room once before. on your first day at hell’s gate, you’d been brought here and given a briefing. the lights were off. only moonlight spilled in through the massive windows. slowly, you took a seat on one of the cold metal chair.

minutes ticked by in silence.

it was so silent that it was deafening. it was the kind of quiet that was loud. you could hear every little sound. your breath. muffled footsteps from the floor above. faint grumbling from machines outside.

you knew what this was.

you had seen enough old detective movies to know that you were put in a room by yourself to induce worry. worry led to overthinking. overthinking led to over-talking. over-talking made it hard to lie.

the doors swinging open made you jump.

“sorry to make you wait,” colonel miles quaritch said as he strode into the room. “the dangers on this god forsaken planet never seem to cease.”

you nodded as he approached. he turned a chair around and sat backwards on it beside you. he smelled of gun powder and alcohol. it burned your nose. the scar on his face had made you uneasy from the moment you saw him for the first time. you wonder what did it. nantang? palulukan? something worse?

“i read your file, miss ramsey.” the colonel said as he folded his hands against the back of his chair. “im sorry to hear about your sister’s passing.”

“thank you.” you said softly. too softly.

“what luck the avatar program has in seeming to recruit scientists who have twins, huh? you and corporal sully are two miracles for this place. without you two, the RDA would’ve lost more billions than they could afford to make back.”

unsure of what to say, you tried your best to smile. as the colonel looked into your eyes, you found it hard to keep that smile. there was something about him that made you feel small. his eye were empty. they were cold. you felt like a rabbit who’d caught the attention of a wolf.

“i watched a couple of your video logs. you got separated from your team and you’ve been taken in by the natives, yes?” the colonel asked.

you nodded once. “yes…”

“as head of security, it’s my job to make sure my people are safe. you’re one of my people, miss ramsey, which means that avatar body you control is, too. to be honest with you, i’d say you’re now one of the most essential people in this hell hole.”

“i have a job for you, missy. i want you to gather intel about the natives for me and record it in your video logs. find out how they operate. find out what it would take to make peace with them.”

your stomach sank.

peace was still being sought.

you were so wrapped up in day to day life in home tree that you forgot that the relationship between the navi and the RDA was unfriendly in every sense of the world.

it made you feel queasy to remember your first night in the forest. sweat pooled in your palms as you recalled seeing him for the first time. those glowing eyes. that bow half-drawn, aiming for your chest.

tsu’tey had every intention of killing you.

and he would’ve if eywa hadn’t stopped him.

the colonel leaned in and asked in a low voice, “do you think you can do that for me?”

“yes, sir.” you whispered. slowly, you nodded. the only thing you could do was nod. “of course.”

“that’s good.” the colonel said with a smile. he tapped his hands on the metal of his chair as his smile grew and grew. “that’s real good, miss ramsey. you’re going to be a great deal of help to me and you’ll be making the lives of everyone here all the safer. besides, it’ll be easier to answer to me than it is to answer to dr. augustine.”

you smiled, too. you forced your lips to show your teeth and you dipped your head. “ah, she’s not so bad…but i will say i’m more keen on tactical work than computers.”

“i like to hear that.” the colonel said. “have you given any thought to enlisting? it could benefit you a lot here in hell’s gate.”

“truthfully, no. i’m not really sure what role it is i play here and i’m not too sure if i’ll pick one at all. i’m here to fill my sisters shoes in any way that i can. right now, it seems my job is to keep learning.” you said.

the colonel seemed to roll your words between the tips of his fingers. “knowledge is power— and i need all the knowledge i can get my hands on. study the natives as close as they’ve been studying you and in time, you won’t need to fill any shoes that aren’t your own.”

“your sister may have been selected to aide dr. augustine in her studies so that she can write a second book that no one will bother to read— but you? you’ve been chosen by me to ensure the security of the men and women on this base. to me, that is far more important than what you can see under a microscope.” the colonel said.

“i understand, sir.” you said with another dip of your head. “i’ll make sure to detail my findings in my logs.”

“good.” the colonel said as he stood. “you have a good rest of your night, miss ramsey. we will be in touch.”

as he walked passed you, your heart returned to its place in your chest and not lodged up into the back of your throat. you uncurled your hands from fists and rubbed them up and down your thighs to wipe away the sweat. you felt as though you could breathe.

“oh and miss ramsey?”

“yes?” you asked, turning your head.

the colonel stopped by the door and said, “make sure not to tell any of your scientist friends about this little arrangement. grace augustine gets very unhappy knowing i’ve stuck my nose into her program.”

“sure,” you said softly. “no problem.”

the colonel left without another word.

you nearly crumbled into a pile of ashes. curling over the table, you rested your face against the cold metal. your heart was racing in your chest. it was hard to breathe around the pressure on your shoulders and the tightness in your throat.

what the hell are you doing, you idiot?

you had no answer for yourself.

covering your head with your arms, anxiety burned your belly. it put a sour taste in your mouth.

you were now on the colonels radar.

he expected information out of you. he expected answers— unlike grace who expected results.

in bed, you could hardly sleep. tossing and turning, you couldn’t lay still. it felt like there were ants in your sheets. each time you felt comfortable, tsu’tey scowl flashed in your mind.

what you were going to do was wrong.

you knew in the core of your being that spying on the clan and handing over your findings to the RDA was wrong.

but what choice did you have?

you had chosen to be a warrior— and yet you had been chosen to be a spy.

you buried your face into your pillow and tried your best to ignore the way shame made you feel.

it brought you shame to know that each time you’d log the events of the day, miles quaritch would watch your recordings and use them to his advantage. and the worst part was that you couldn’t just spew bullshit. you had been tasked with learning how they operated. learning how they functioned not just as a people but as a united force. if you didn’t make the right reports with the right kind of information, what would happen to you?

you had no idea.

you did know, though, that you’d never be allowed to touch a link-pod again.

the avatar body you’d grown to love would lay a husk until it died. you’d be ripped from the forest like a weed out of the ground. you’d never be able to feel mitsia’s heart. you’d never be able to sit in home tree and listen to the people sing.

you’d never get to see tsu’tey again.

he tolerated you because you looked like him. blue, tall, and freckled with bioluminescence, your avatar did it’s job of seeming normal enough to even the mightiest warrior. even if he’d never admit it, over the last nine days you had become familiar. he wasn’t very fond of you and he was definitely not your friend— but at the very least, you were familiar to him.

he would shoot you dead if he saw you standing before him as the alien you truly were.

that was something you couldn’t risk.

your admiration for him and your hunger to learn from him was not something you could let slip away— so you would do what the colonel asked of you.

in order to run through the forest and bicker with him, you’d do as miles quaritch asked. and you would do so carefully. cautiously. as gently as you could— because you did not want was to lose the freedom you’d been given. you didn’t want to lose the life you had just begun to lead. you didn’t want to be trapped inside metal walls and crowded by machines and pollution any longer.

and the last thing you ever wanted to do was hurt him.

eywa had given tsu’tey a sign protect you. when the atokirina landed on his bow, it had been a duty gifted to him. he protected you from the nantang— from himself. and he would continue to protect you from anything that tried to harm you.

tsu’tey had given you a purpose. when he carried you to home tree and took on the burden of becoming your teacher, he’d given you a second chance at life.

it was now your turn to protect him.

from the RDA.

from the colonel.

and maybe even from yourself.

thanks for reading :)

[vacantgodling]

I figured I should send you an ask instead of spamming your notifications: I saw the word "cyberwestern" and almost lost my entire mind. Graves and Dove are so interesting. Can I get an infodump on the project? What inspired it and how it's coming along, etc. The more details you can give on What Their Fucking Problem Is, the better. Thank you :>

honestly i am totally down with notif spam so if you still want to after i talk your ear off, HAVE AT IT :DD

so i did kinda do a mini info dump centering around graves like 20 minutes ago -> here but i figure a more... organized answer should be in order!

inspiration

what inspired the graves we dug is currently hard for me to remember. i think i mainly just wanted cowboy ocs? and one of my friends (@/nonsensical-pendulum) has an oc named 'graves' and the name sort of got stuck in my head because i thought it was Cool. and then, for once (this is a rarity for me) the title came pretty quickly after the graves we dug. and i didn't know what it was about for a bit, just that there were cowboys, a mc named graves, and they were digging holes... apparently. and then slowly from there things started to fall into place. unlike a lot of my other wips i feel like tgwd has a bit of a hard to pinpoint starting point, but i also think that's bc a lot of the stuff i had relating to its origins began on the blog i used to have in 2021, but then i deleted it entirely so all of that is lost now LOL

when it came to making it a cyberwestern itself, honestly i saw some cyberwestern style art with cowboys in citypop color schemes and i was like YEAHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHH. so i thought it'd be cool to go cyber instead of a traditional western lol.

how its going

so i'mma be straight up, tgwd is on my secondary wips bracket. if you look at my big ol wip list here it kinda breaks it all down, but those on my secondary list are ones where i enjoy working on them but they just don't have the same level of brainrot status as those at the top of my mind--namely paramour and btaf have taken those spots in the past couple of years. so usually how it goes with any of my secondary wips is i'll just be vibing, suddenly think about an aspect of it, think about it for a bit and then perhaps have a bit of a frenzy where i build on it, and then i end up deflecting back to my major ideals lol. so rn (at least for the past hour) i've been thinking about tgwd and getting asks is kinda an excuse to keep focus and work on it. i'll probably end up defecting back to my usual haunts in a few days.

THIS BEING SAID i have written some things for it which i shall get into momentarily

but what's going on?

so basically here's a mini timeline/play by play of what's happening that leads up to the beginning of the wip

firstly, the land is kind of a perpetual night; the sun on this world (haven't decided if its another planet or smthn yet) is pretty dim and so cities and fluorescent lights are the main lightsources of the world. there is also an 'artificial moon' but tbh idk what that means rn.

GRAVES in his early 20s leaves the ranch where he grew up to make a life for himself in the closest city called Rapture. Rapture is a city of glitz and glamor, run by crime lords and greed. he ends up entering "the organization" (it doesn't have a name yet) as an armed hire and gets hired out on different hits by different vendors to do their bidding (which is usually taking out their grudges on other crime lords. the organization has a strict neutrality policy that most everyone respects--if you have enough money for a hit, it'll be done, or you better hire some better guards).

to aid in the ever growing violence in the city, somehow someway the organization develops a special ops unit for their largest jobs, which includes an injection of a serum which manifests certain abilities in their best agents. graves, and his new acquaintance TOMB become some of the first to experience the serum, and this ends with graves gaining a black glow around his feet and an ability to walk silently and through solid objects, and tomb gaining an ability where his mouth glows orange (i haven't decided what it is, but i do know unlike graves or dove, he can't turn his ability off).

the two do solo jobs for awhile, until the organization decides that they need mentors to train new recruits that use the serum and this is how graves ends up meeting DOVE--a former opera star who's ability glows green centered around his eyes. they sort of hit it off immediately, and though tomb warns graves about getting too attached but graves can't really help it. he and dove get. attached.

a few years like this go by, and then the organization gets a huge hit--to take place at one of the biggest centers of crime, a club modeled like an old state building called The Rome, towards the epicenter of Rapture. the organization puts its best agents: graves and tomb, and their two rapidly trustworthy mentees: dove and dawn (tomb's mentee). the situation quickly goes south when their plot for assassination is discovered, and in an effort to save the mission, graves makes well--a grave mistake, and ends up trying to take down the target. unfortunately, the shot misses and ends up hitting dove instead. an explosion goes off afterward, and tomb and graves barely escape with their lives. dawn and dove are presumed dead.

while tomb compartmentalizes and continues on with his work, graves breaks down. and in his grief, he decides to defect from the organization without getting permission first. (after the mission at the rome, graves and dove did get permission to retire, but since the job wasn't done they aren't allowed to leave) since he was also pretty high up, he also has trade secrets and they couldn't just let him go and be a loose canon like that. its easier that if he's not going to comply, that he be dead--and so they send the one person who can catch him after him: tomb. tomb's taking his time, but he's also doing what has to be done.

the whole thing however turns upside down again when dove comes "back" from the grave. he's alive! very much not dead! and from what i'm comfortable sharing at the moment is yes, he was harmed by what happened but he's still very much alive and is ready to make good on their promise: to retire. and if he has to drag graves into making it happen then so be it.

what's written thus far

the official chapter 1 -> the start of the rapture

beginning of chapter 2 -> you're supposed to be dead

i want what you want (or they try talking about it, doesn't work, sleep together to create more problems instead)

do you trust me? (or, dove lets out some of his aggression at a very kicked puppy graves LMAO)

and yeah -- i think that's the most info i got right now! there's a lot of stuff i got to figure out an outline as well. BUT yeah i hope this was helpful :3c

[0cto0tter]

Heyyy :D I just wanna quickly say I love your content!! It's amazing!! I was wondering if I could get some Peso x Shellington headcannons?

Thank you so much ^^

And I'M BACK BABY!!!

Sorry for the absence, I was in highschool, which I've GRADUATED FROM! Ignore that I graduated early June, I'm working on college stuff too.

So, I'm back to work here >:3

•─────✦─────•

• At first, Peso thought Shellington was constantly in the med bay because of how accident prone he is

• Shellington mirrors Peso's stims, Peso mirrors Shellington's stims. They stim loop for HOURS

• Shellington would use "I want to learn first aid" as an excuse to spend more time with Peso without being hurt

• Alternatively, Peso would use "I want to learn more about this creature so I can provide better care" as an excuse to spend more time with Shellington with Shellington being hurt

• Dashi and Kwazii are the ones that ultimately got them together

• It was obvious to every that they were both pining after each other. Really obvious. Even Barnacles caught on. Do better.

• Catch these two info dumping at 3am, Peso half asleep and still talking while Shellington is vibrating in place waiting for their turn again

• Peso did Shellington's top surgery. It's canon, I was the bandage roll on the top shelf

• Shellington likes to bite, Peso preens (canon to their real life uhhhhh... alternates, animals, idk, o forgot the word)

• Shellington doesn't understand a single bit of Spanish. Peso always compliments him and says loving phrases in Spanish to them

• Family reunions are chaotic

• While Shellington has a small family, Peso's is big enough to fill a convention building with people still waiting outside

• Picture a baby penguin pointing at Shellington and saying, "Mama! Look at this weird penguin! He's got a lot of fuzzy feathers!" While Peso is trying not to laugh in the background

• Peso is the honorary 2nd father/older brother to the Vegimals now, I don't make the rules

• They have mini dates in the Gup E. Tweak has a strict "Don't let Shellington touch the wheel" with that gup

•─────✦─────•

I'm back, expect a few posts today/in the next few days on both this account and my side accounts

[ladysomething]

honey, I'm homeee!

1. maddie I physically cannot wait for the untitled fic because it seems like it's gonna be good. (let's be honest, if it's yours, is gonna be good. weekly dose of me sending you love 😘)

2. the snippet made me feel a little bit like acting insane, you know?

3. I just now remembered that I, in fact, did not send my ask/rant/yapping session about last chapter. tumblr hates me I think. but, it's coming right up, because we're about to re- read. I do remember that I wanted to hit someone with a pan or something like that. although that happens quite often. regardless of whose face would be on the flat surface of the pan.

+1. brother asks: I do not want to jinx anyone, of course, but can you ask Lady if she believes in the ao3 writer curse and if she has ever experienced or something like it? he's been investigating, next thing you know, he'll be sending you asks himself. /jk

+2. my roommie also, has been investigating. though to a bigger level. he has turned our living room into a giant base of operations. we even have this funny whiteboard with the red thread and a damn lot of random drabbles he makes in the middle of the night only about your fic. If I could I would send you a picture but, as stated beforehand, tumblr hates me. so I can't. yes, he does have a job. a serious, strict and well-paid one at that. his question is: how did Max found Kelly? did he knew her from before, was she in the paddock before? was the recontratripletetrahijueputa carepicha malnacido desgraciado (idk if there's a translation for that insult, so we'll settle for wretch motherfucker) that hurt her was from there? and when will we see more of that Mercedes guy?

have a nice day sweetie! I'll come back in a while with our report. 🫡

blesssss! I won't respond to your first few because I have another ask waiting for me about the new fic, so I'll talk about all that there!!

so for the other stuff:

+1. serious answer: no I don't believe, because if somebody is writing long enough, then obviously something big will happen in their life! non-serious answer ... it's a thing. literally last night I posted the ao3 an hour after our brand new puppy was rushed to the vet after swallowing a bee and going into anaphylactic shock. I posted it to make myself feel better while waiting for news about whether she was going to live. so yes!!! its a thing!!! and well ... you could say I've experienced it, but tbh my life is literally just drama - writing fic - drama - writing fic. so like. ya know.

+2. I WANT TO SEE THE BASE OF OPERATIONS SO BADLY. DM ME??? DISCORD DM ME??? IDC!!

for his questions - can't tell you how Max found Kelly. it will be revealed soon!

can't tell you if he knew her before ... also about to be revealed!

can't tell you where her abuser is from - where about to find out who it is.

I CAN tell you that we will see of the Mercedes guy, his proper purpose will be served within the next ten or so chapters. probably less.

[skye707]

SKYE! HOW would a date go with each of the Riddlers? I feel like ZY would sabotage the others any chance he could get. Hopefully this wasn’t already asked.

Who would have thought this is what my blog would become? Fulfilling people's desire to know how their favorite Riddler who go about romancing on a date.

I could not be prouder of myself.

Unburied - It’s pretty casual, I’m not gonna lie. He’s the most laidback of the Riddlers, and he’s not going out of his way to be strange. Something simple, like a lunch date, to feel out the situation. No fear for your life with this one.

ZY - Aw man, he’s got a date?? Better start the night off right by being twenty minutes fashionably late. While you’re on the date, though, I hope you’re not shy. He’s taking every opportunity he can to show you off to the waitstaff, bartender, other patrons of wherever you may be. “Yeah, aren’t they super hot? Only the best for Mr. Eddie Nygma.” Oh, shoot, yeah you’re paying, right?

Dano - Red. The entire time. There is not a moment he is not visibly embarrassed. Not by you! By the notion that other people can see that this little weirdo is on a date with this being of pure light for some fucking reason beyond his comprehension. Maybe stick to something secluded and personal.

YJ - This dude is falling over himself to ensure that every detail goes perfectly. He’s got an absolutely adorable day of activities planned. Ice cream shops, walks in the park, an evening of fireworks (idk how he managed to find that this time of the year but whatever). Like, this is the kind of date that a little kid dreams of having with their first love.

Gotham - Okay, where YJ’s perfectly planned date is cute and fun, this guy’s date is regimented and meticulous. It’s not that it isn’t a great time, he put a lot of thought into what you would enjoy together, but he’s very strict that “we have to leave at this time because otherwise we won’t be able to catch the sunset at this location at precisely 7:43 pm”. If you’re cool with that, then it’s gonna be great!

BTAA - Quite possibly the most romantic date you will ever go on in your life. He has evaluated the statistics and logic of every situation that may arise and is prepared for anything. He calls in some favors and has a Michelin Star restaurant air drop your favorite meal to be enjoyed on the deck of this yacht he just stole. Lots of compliments, both for you and himself, he’s such a sweetheart when he wants to be.

Arkham - It’s a date in the privacy of his little lair, but that doesn’t make it any less special. He covered the entire ceiling with stringed lights in the shape of question marks. Dinner is takeout from his favorite restaurant (the one thing he failed to acknowledge was what your preference was in terms of a meal). After that, with a flourish of his little dirty hands, he’ll get some music playing and set up chairs so you and he can watch the Batman fail another one of his stupendous traps. Yes, Mr. Nygma sir sure knows how to meticulously structure a good time.

BTAS - He’s shy! So very shy! When he’s the Riddler, he can do whatever he pleases, but when presenting himself as Eddie Nygma, he’s a little less confident. He’s sparing no expense to make this a memorable occasion for the both of you, but it’s easy to see that he’s just as nervous as you probably are.

Telltale - His idea of a “date” is going to a nice restaurant together. Which is great, but don’t expect any great lengths to be taken to make it romantic. Is it not enough that he would give up hours of his precious time to converse with you? Maybe that’s just his love language though: giving the time of day.

[mychlapci]

Prowl saying they should get rid of them? Nooo, the moment he suggests that Ratchet looks ready to throw hands, and if he didnt have an armful of bitlets he’d 100% beat the living daylights out of Prowl.

Maybe they switch every week once the second litter is old enough to spend more then a couple hours away from Megatron. Ratchet has the younger litter on the first week, everyone ends up loving the little guys- yet when they cry its just….sirens🚨. Extremely. Loud. Ambulance. Sirens. and then him and Megatron swap every sunday. The autobots trying to deal with demanding little brats once Ratchet has to parent the older bitties for the week, they bite, hiss and throw whatever their stubby arms can pick up, they’re strong for such tiny creatures, clearly their mix of genetics is the reason. But then they act like utter sweethearts for Ratchet so he doesnt believe any of the autobots saying his children are little twats because his sire-coding tells him they’re all trying to get his bitlets in trouble, tiny devils with bright blue optics and innocent-sounding giggles- innocent to Ratchet anyway.

They learn VERY quickly that Prowl shows the most emotion toward their shenanigans and he’s usually the one they annoy the most. Escaping whoever’s care their under when Ratchet has something important to and they escape JUST to annoy Prowl until he bluescreens or just drives off. I’d say something about lockdown / prowl but idk if it’d make sense but imagine prowl comes back from one of his little drives, those drives can last 4-5 days depending on how stressed he is, and he comes back pregnant. Anyway.

So naturally everyone fawns over the younger sparklings when its their turn to be round, Chubby cheeks with bright red optics is just too cute for even the most stubborn Autobots to ignore, so they get cuddles by everyone, ignoring that they carry the crazy warlord genes is hard, Even prowl interacts with these bitlets instead of the older hellspawns.

I really wanna draw the devil spawns, but like..I get so stressed drawing plus i almost broke my neck on some ice ;-;

SIDE RANT. Uh. Not really a rant I personally want to say that Burnt Ice anon seems to have a big brain thats really wrinkly because whatever they send gives the tingles, we need to make their ideas canon. 👍

- Chase anon, again im soo sorry i feel feral rn ;-;

I always enjoy the thought of grumpy, strict Ratchet being an absolute softie when it comes to his own bitlets. The older sparklings spent more time with Megatron so they're a little more hissy than the younger ones, which were born after Ratchet told everyone and therefore have been spending a little more time with him, and the autobots in general. But he loves all of them all the same. Oh, the older bitlets bit Prowl? No, they wouldn't do that! They're his bitlets, after all, and they've been raised with some manners, thank you very much! if they bit you, it was probably your own damn fault. He just coddles them so much that everyone is in complete disbelief that Ratchet even has that amount of kindness in him. 

Prowl eventually getting used to the younger bitlets because they're pretty sweet, all things considered, but the older ones he wishes would stay with Megatron. They're violent and they seem to only ever want to bite him. Of course, genocidal maniac genes carry on to all of the bitties, it's only a matter of time before the younger ones start causing trouble... Not to mention… Ratchet's pretty big and boxy. Megatron is twice as big and twice as boxy, so you know the bitlets are big, fat, and strong as hell. Menaces, the lot of them. 

Btw now i also kind of wanna draw the megaratch babies… i wish i had the time for it. and the art skills. oh well

[urmanipulatorytendencies]

enha as twenty first century american teenager stereotypes (up until 2024)

I LIV LAF LUV playing association with enhypen because they're my interesting little stinka-butts who, in my opinion, are so frozen in this whole kpop ordeal and i need them BROKEN FREEEE

Hybe, babes, let them explore the real world and interact with idols and people who don't gaf about their latest random single release and just wanna vibe w them I BEG

+ Yang Jungwon aka "Maicah"

Maicah Jungwon Yang is the middle man of your class. He's involved, he's energetic with the dude-bros, and he's on the JV basketball team. He only has okay grades but is somehow on Student Council. He's friends with a ton of the Varsity boys, and he's got lots of cool friends. Jungwon is super bubbly but he's really put together. His rl engagement in school and enha leadership compels me to think he's responsible enough to be in Student Council but bros also just an athlete. He'd also probs be on the track team as a 100m sprinter or smth. He'd definitely have a lot of friends but he might have a surprisingly unconventional bestie. Maicah wears the same two pairs of nike sweats along with Yeezy slides and a black hoodie. If it's cold, Maicah brings a Spiderman blanket to school.

+ Lee Heeseung aka "Ethan"

Ethan is the ultimate trend maxxer of whatever Bay Area high school you have imagined. He wears string earphones, never sporting shorts, and always has a damn beanie on. Absolutely not in sports-- is THE arts student. He's on the junior group of horn instruments in band, probably plays the trumpet, and isn't all that great but he's a fast learner. Hee would be top 30 in his class, but would most likely prioritize his rising Sound Cloud presence post-Grad. Doesn't date but he has a lot of younger friends, flirts with girls two years younger than him but also maintains a homoerotic friendship with his childhood friend in college who's like a year older than him.

+ Park Jay aka "Jay"-- DUH

Jay is the batman. He's farms or surfs (depending on what region you imagine we're in the context of) by day, and is in a garage band by night. He has a super duper close knit friend group of equally spunky guys. Has absolutely no female friends-- not out of misogyny or anything but bro is just such a dude idk. He's pretty smart, def a AP Chem warrior but stinks at stem. His focal point is the school guitar group. He probably gets his community service hours working with the lunch ladies. Jay is charismatic and super sweet-- but he probably deals with anger issues and was def that kid in behavior management during elementary. Despite his emo TM status-- Jay wears the fluck out of his chino + Sperrys combo.

+ Sim Jaeyun aka "Jake"-- DUH

He is the captain of the Varsity Soccer team. Jake is popular as a mf; has a big friend group, dates around, is loved by the teachers, and most of the school appreciates his mega vibes. Think Jeremiah from The Summer I Turned Pretty. Jake probably gets zesty allegations cause he wears lots of jewelry and paints his nails but he doesn't mind cause trust-- he's pulling every female bro-lover in the COUNTY. He's super duper competitive and is a strict captain, which is the only reason why someone'd have a problem with him...but he makes up for it by being a beast on the field. He's also on Honor Roll, cranking his Class with a 4.6 GPA and Salutatorian status. He's a chronic overstayer at school with him being in sports and academic clubs year round. Jake probably has some weird connections with Parker which throw people off like Junior year. Chronic Croc wearer. Bro's committing to Notre Dame for Soccer.

+ Park Sunghoon aka "Parker"

The hottest loser on campus fr fr. He's well known for being the numba one hallway crush but bro has no school friends so everyone kinda just assumes he's a little bit of a bitch (in the best way possible). He never stays longer than he has to but he's a hard worker and the history teacher loves his compassion for AP Gov.. He's a club Volleyball player outside of school but he's not in school athletics (he's got connections to the Athletics Dir. tho). He's always at school early to use the weight room and he's an avid lean pump master poster on IG. Hoon was super isolated as a kid so I imagine that Parker would probably have a hard time being social with just normal kids (Parker's homeschooled in elementary for the plot). He was probably chubby in middle school and then had a gigantourous glow up freshman-sophomore year: 6'0, lean muscle, "clean guy" aesthetic. Guys def wanna be him but they're jelly cause their girlfriends are obsessed. Closet gay but no one knows until a random IG story during college where he takes a pic w his boyfriend or something idk. Wears Jordan 4s.

+ Kim Sunoo aka "Sonny"

The typical friendly gay bestie minus the obnoxious Netflixed exaggerations (i.e. loud and super sassy). Just think about the token feminine gay guy at your school-- he probably has a group of girl friends, is kinda introverted lwk, wears either super outdated 2018 IG fashion or is the most fabulous Hollister warrior. He definitely has a weird situationship with one of the popular guys-- top athlete, unlikely to be friends with him but is anyways...you know the shabang. Sonny's pretty witty, pretty scholarly-- excels in stem but has a soft spot for English. He probably listens to Ariana Grande and is a Olivia Rodrigo die-hard. Sonny probably bakes, too. Overall, he's on the low but anyone knows that unprovoked, that mf is loud sometimes. Will not hesitate to beat a bitch up too.

+ Nishimura Ri ki aka "Nico"

The skater boi TM, bahaha. Just kidding, but fr, I think American Ri ki would skateboard. Like-- in an East Coast way not a West Coast way if you catch my drift. He's a New Yorker at heart-- going to a crowded arts school somewhere idk. He's constantly outdoing himself with the fits-- the girls love it. He's can be shy but has a knack for being a trouble maker-- probably went to special group as a kid, the guy with ADHD (not that that's a big deal but ik we all got that one guy in class that's hyper to no end, n to me, that's ri ki). Nico's got a couple friends, plays basketball in his free time, and his specialty is, of course, dance. He leads the department by a long shot so everyone either loves him or hates him. Nico isn't afraid to be flamboyant or outgoing (as Ri ki is competitive and a little bit of a diva) but can come off a little high strung sometimes.

[gayamulet]

Art drawling

Its sort of wild how art came to a screeching halt as soon as I got a full time job. And yeah, there's a bunch of corresponding factors- a physically demanding full time job crammed into 4 days, that I'm older and so, working with less energy, sleeping a lot more (seriously wtf), and compartmentalizing time much more. Freestanding time & energy is less and has to be planned out and those times left open for the chance to 'do art' in whatever capacity I can do not equate to 100% output success rates like day job hours. I can go in with a 'fuck yeah, art night!' frame of mind and come out pretty unfulfilled (again, with the awareness that fulfillment is not the goal).

And of course recognizing that many more mundane tasks fulfill a bigger chunk of that makemakemake drive- meal prep, cleaning (ugh), plant care, yard care, mending work clothes, etc. And you know, the more annoying factor. A lot of that creative energy also gets fulfilled by mundane tasks at work- animal care, walking, cleaning (yes that includes complicated dogshit catastrophes), training, behavior data collection & entry. I come out of it of course physically tired because it is hard messy work, but it also just has me choosing/seeking artistic outlets less, and not feeling too bad about it introspectively. Its make-drive going someplace useful, through whatever framework my brain has established as useful, idk.

All this brings me to my actual point of frustration with art-making, that when I have time and there is a bit of planning involved (I have exactly one con art show and local tiny art market to work toward this summer) and I sit down and I casually think about what I'd like, for me, for these events with no pressure and, again, for me, that

I just don't want to make myself anything. That it already exists, that there are endless iterations of whatever visual landscape I'm riffing through at any given time, that it doesn't need physical manifestation, that it no longer serves me creatively, that I don't care. I can dangle a glittery new process (ink, linocut, etc) like a its-about-the-process carrot in front of me, but suddenly I don't like carrots. And it feels, less born of a dead creative drive, and more like...an extension of what I don't want from other people- junk. That I do not want to generate more junk for myself. Does this make sense? I think it sounds more heartless than I mean for it to. Like unless there is very defined intention, then I don't need it? I cannot think of a way to explain it that doesn't sound protestant as fuck. Maybe I've hit some critical mass of art intake overload thanks to the internet, maybe this is just what creativity looks like now. Tho, there's enough of a useful task involved that freelance artwork is still hopping along- much more slowly than before for all the regular reasons listed above- but otherwise its fine. I still get that pleasant little brain buzz.

I get these surges of frustration, that I've fallen off from working toward some ultra-personalized visual landscape goal like I used to, that once I do I'll be perceived as human again, or something. Like this is still some pinnacle of artistic merit, in some mythical corner of my brain. But those surges are much less frequent than they used to be, and fizzle out quickly. And idk. Art isn't going anywhere in my life, but where it comes from and how I'm making and shaping things is changing again. I guess?

*I DO, however, wanna make more cardboard masks. So bad.

**I know I kept this in a pretty strict work vs art vacuum, without acknowledging other uses of time, including other hobbies which of course also accounts for creative/emotional outlet but you know what I'm gonna stop here before you guys figure out I'm actually a robot

[mariyekos]

OH I KEEP FORGETTING TO POST ABOUT THESE THINGS WHEN THEY HAPPEN BUT MY STATIC GOT A WEEK 2 CLEAR OF M4S!! I got to Enrage week 1 but pf was really inconsistent and spending 5 hours getting to your prog point twice was both soul crushing and time consuming to the point I gave up on the week 1 clear so it is what it is.

This does make me more confident about FRU, even if I know this tier was super easy. There are a few people I think might be interested in doing it together but idk how many will join us, especially given gearing in this game sucks and we potentially have double caster which may or may not be reasonable. Right now the ones I'm thinking *might* be interested are a tank, me on healer, a melee, a phys ranged, and two casters, but again idk if they will really want to do it on release (especially the tank) given how TOP went (i.e. 5 months of effort to disband halfway through P5 because a clear didn't seem like it was in the books). But if we do FRU I think we'd have a 3 month hard limit and be much more strict about the skill level, so we could maybe do it.

The upside of FRU will be that unlike TOP, I WON'T be raiding TEA/a second ultimate at the same time so if I feel like I'm lagging behind I will have more time to PF to try to improve. If we do FRU a few people might be interested in raising 4 days a week too, but we'll see. It's hard to schedule things when we're in different timezones. Especially since one person will be back to being 5 hours ahead of me starting a few weeks after FRU will drop, I think. I really do want to do FRU... M4S didn't really hit the spot in terms of hard content, and I'd like to do something that really challenges me again. Especially since AST isn't nearly as fun to play anymore with the Dawntrail changes. It's a lot mote braindead. I miss EW AST. And ShB AST. Dawntrail AST just doesn't require enough quick thinking.

[f0point5]

I think one of the other things people overlook with dating an F1 driver (or most professional athletes) is how kinda boring and regimented their day to day is. Like yeah they do take private jets and party on yachts BUT they’re also going to bed at 10 pm every night and eating strict meal plans and training for hours a day (especially with sim work). I’ve worked with athletes before and they really live a train, play, eat, sleep routine 80% of the time. If not 90% of the time depending on how long their season is and how out of shape they can afford to get weight/endurance wise.

Dating someone like Mick or another reserve driver would be a way more enjoyable life than an active F1 driver bc they don’t have to travel to every race or watch their routines quite as much but obviously there’s pay differences there (for most of them outside of Mick) bc Drugovich/Vesti/Lawson aren’t making enough to live the lifestyle most girls would expect/want with an athlete

Yeah I can’t stand the diet thing. I avoid fit guys because of this honestly I can’t be around a man who’s counting calories it gives me such an intense ick

Idk Laila seems happy with Mick 🤷‍♀️ but then yeah I think your average reserve driver is not doing the numbers a proper wag would expect. They tend to have more “normie” gfs anyway