#because i was there for. csa reasons.

[comfycozycrossfox]

ahaha. fuck. i ✨will not be processing this well✨

[susiehunsecker-remade]

i've been struggling on how exactly to word this but it's always bothered me how people zone in on roman as the only roy sibling who's experienced sexual abuse based on the subtext of the show when we literally see logan sexually assault and harass shiv on screen. and like. running with the subtext logic it's not like that doesn't exist for kendall and even connor either. it's not even that i don't believe it actually happened for him it's just a matter of paying attention to everyone else

[malkaleh]

Inspired by discussions with my discord friends especially @unseenacademic and @jessbakescakes about how Abbey adopted the staff as her kids as much as Jed and Leo did and probably earlier. TW for abuse discussion.

Sam has never been Josh, the son you worry about. Not really. Oh, there had been moments, Abbey knew that but of all of their unexpected additional children Sam had been one of the easiest.

Maybe that meant they should have paid more attention - the sweet kind level headed (relative to perhaps) ones like Sam, like Donna hiding in plain sight.

They’d had Dr Freeride show up, of course (the fact he was ever even passed through the first year of medical school disgusts Abbey beyond measure). But now, now it’s Sam’s own ghost. And none of them had seen it, had noticed.

She knows of course, that child abusers hide in plain sight. But it’s never been her son, her child.

[chrisemrysfics]

This happens often enough that it is frustrating and I wanted to say something about it: can I just please enjoy a platonic/familial Tony&Peter fanfic without that enjoyment being broken by the author insulting or bashing on Starker shipper?

I love their dynamic in canon, I love them as mentor/mentee, I love them as father/son, and the reason I love Starker ship is first and foremost the idea that love is stronger than all the potential issues they face for a potential relationship. Because that's what it is: not inherent wrong aspects, but potential issues. And "potential" means it doesn't always become a reality. Fics that explore when it isn't necessarily healthy, or legal, aren't fundamentally different than fics exploring violent themes for example. It's about the messiness and complexity of humanity, which in itself is beautiful. And in Starker, its because I love their canon dynamic and I love the idea of their love being stronger than the potential issues, that I can enjoy darker/unhealthy depictions of the ship. And it's all fiction, which is first and foremost about telling a story. And a fictional story is entertainment specifically because we know it's fiction and no real human being were harmed to make that fiction, nor does anyone depicted is an actual real human being being harmed in the events of the fictional story.

And you know what is the irony? Not a single fic I've read for Starker makes explicit or implicit comment of the same type about people who only view them as platonic/familial. When I read fics for the platonic/familial dynamic, sometimes the author in the notes will call Starker shipper "gross", or disgusting, and sometimes there are moments in the fic itself where for the idea of them together is thrown around and the characters react "ew", which sometimes make sense in context, but other times, it honestly doesn't feel like it make sense to have this show up and have this strong feeling of being in there for a more "subtle call out". But not a single fic for Starker does the same thing.

Most Starker shipper, myself included, respect if someone just doesn't see them this way. Most Starker shipper will think carefully about the tags to put, and you know what I did see often? Starker author who feel a need to state that they don't condone the real life version of the stuff that they write. It breaks my heart everytime because it's so obviously because they know what part of the fandom say about them. They can't even enjoy and write what they like without feeling a need to try and express it's just them enjoying fiction. Non-Starker act so offended, but they're the one who put pressure onto the rest of the fandom that is either platonic/familial only but respectful, or Starker too.

And you know what? I'll come out and say it: what I fucking don't condone is harrassing other people, and butting your head into the genuine happiness of others. What I happily condone is respect, choice, consent, genuine love, and a real wish for each other well-being even when it's hard or complex or messy. If two or more people genuinely care for each other, choose each other, respect each other, wants to try, and have enough maturity for their choice and consent to not be blind? That is what matter. I wouldn't want to see a late teen with an adult, because the amount of potential issues is enormous, and most of the time, it won't work out or it isn't healthy. But to pretend there isn't a tiny amount of cases where it does work out is a disservice to any relationship that started where it was really iffy, and yet worked out for them because they truly, genuinely loved each other.

You know what else I'll come out and say it? I'm a fucking survivor of CSA, and it's so damn healing to see people who enjoy things I enjoy without feeling it's only because I'm "broken", to see that it's something natural in our psyche. I was robbed the ability to grow up blind to what sex is, I was robbed my consent, I was made to feel powerless. But I recovered from all of this, a survivor and not a victim anymore, and growing up, I was always more mature than my age, which meant I knew that it is possible for someone to feel more mature than others people their age. If I fell in love with an adult as a teen, I would have known the inherent risks. And I would have been so angry, and hurt, to be dismissed, for others to try and take away my agency again. I wouldn't have wanted, and still don't want, someone to feel, or feel again, the hurt of your agency being violated. On the other end, even as a teen, and still as an adult, I would be just as angry to see a child or a teen that is being abused or who is in a dangerous situation, where their agency is not properly respected. As a teen, and now as an adult, it pisses me off to see the way people in fandom can act for mere fiction, because all I see are people who ignore and dismiss other people agency. All I see is people harassing and violating other people. Because I know what the real life feeling is like, and I can recognize it a miles away when it happens.

No fiction has either violated me. But people? Oh yes, they do. They don't even have to come attack me directly. Everytime I see them attack someone else, or make certain comments in their author note. And I'm so damn lucky I did heal, and recover. Because even though I did, it still feels frustrating and hurtful. I cannot begin to imagine how it feels like for those like me, or similar to me, who are still healing and have to face this over fiction. Who might not even know why it hurt, or only in part.

So yeah, this has angered me enough to come out and say it: watch what you are doing and saying over mere fiction, because chances are, what you are doing is violating other people. Abuse, and violation, aren't always sexual or even physical. Emotional&mental abuse, emotional&mental violation, are just as real. And fiction cannot abuse or violate, because there is no one real inside fiction, there is no power. Only real people can hurt others this way.

I didn't spend years healing and recoving to be walked over by people who either don't undestand, or who do but unknowingly (or worst, knowingly) become the abusers. And you, who enjoy dark fiction of any kind, especially "problematic ships", especially ships like Starker?

Thank you. You're the ones who sees what I see, even when you never experienced what I did, and I hope you never had to. Not the ones who act on supposed moral high grounds, but you, you are the ones who truly understand. I am angry for your sake, because I know what it feels like to be violated in the worst of ways, and I never wish anyone to be violated in any way. So thank you for looking into these topics right in the eyes, and knowing there is nothing wrong with enjoying them. Thank you, especially, to the ones that actually point out when the situation is entirely legal, if not risky, and those who show how such ships can be healthy, for unknowingly recognizing how people like me would have felt if a similar situation had happened in real life. For recognizing where the line is between what is violation, and what isn't.

You're attacked so many times from content exploring darker topics, darker depictions of ships, or ships who aren't inherently dark but have potential issues, so for once, I want you to hear it: thank you.

[sevicia]

Also someone left these tags on that last post and it's pissing me offff like why the fuck are we comparing horror movies to CHILD PORN ???? What do you MEAN "actual horror movies"?? And every horror movie iceberg I've ever seen HAS a title saying stuff like "Distubing horror movies" "Extreme horror movies" "Banned horror movies" so the thought of someone clicking on that and going "There better not be anything upsetting in here!" is so crazy to me. ARE YOU STUPID???? "Can you actually recommend stuff that's genuinely worth watching" Can you kill yourself???

[niru13]

Ah, let me check this one thing on my phone real quick—

*opens tiktok*

*closes tiktok*

*opens reddit*

*closes reddit*

*starts playing tetris*

*remembers I wanted to check when the next episode of the series I’m watching airs*

*closes google*

*opens tiktok*

[butchwink]

if youre an autistic trans woman and you tell someone not to pity you they just walk away from you and call you a toxic creep and a stalker

[truckstoptigers]

what i want to know is why he wants to talk to me again

why he even tried to get in with a friend request

and when I say it like that it sounds so stupid for me to be so scared, but after years of complete radio silence, the fact that he wants to contact me at all is so fucking terrifying

it doesn't matter that he'll never get a reply. to me the fact that he tried is bad enough

[sick-as-a-dog]

anyeays if anyone is keeping up with me defending my sustem on the bs accusations that some proendo asshat keeps makong up about us, this is my warning to NOT hareass him or anything. just block, maybe report (tho knowing tumblr staff theres no point in trying), and move on. please.

[mintykiwi]

who hurt all tomorrows for you :(

):

[beneath-the-willow-tree]

Controversial opinion, perhaps, but Armand is actually more Utena than Anthy to me.

[truckstoptigers]

i remember i'd hear about how my state is one of the most dangerous places in terms of sex trafficking and i would think, what an awful thing. how terrible is it that my state has such an issue with trafficking that it's enough for it to be a well-known, well-documented serious danger/risk area.

and i still didn't think it would ever happen to me.

[s1llyfreakx3]

(intentionally vague vent)

uhhh damn i promised myself i'd never go back like what, 5 times at least? and now i have a session account ;_;

[venting-and-other-anonymous]

!!!ONLINE CSA TW!!!

Said in a joking way because i cope through humour ✨

ok but it's very funny that one of the guys who like online-child-predatored (words ;-;) me had his username as adultRP. Hmmm yes very adult indeed