#because i wanted to make something i would actually be able to read if i found it at a library. altho the audio book IS gonna be bomb

[frooogscream]

I am LITERALLY DYSLEXIC and I one hundred percent stand by “If you can’t write unassisted by AI, fuck you!”, and as a dyslexic person am beating you with hammers!

Cause how dare you use people like me as an excuse for your art-stealing resource-guzzling regurgitated soulless slop!

How dare you steel the opportunity to find joy in writing from kids and teenagers who struggle with dyslexia like me or because of other issues, by making them believe that they will never be able to do it and don’t need to because there’s a computer to think for them! I loved writing as a teenager, I filled notebooks upon notebooks with poems and essays on my newest hyperfixation, I always was top of the class when it came to creative writing and now as an adult even my spelling isn’t atrocious anymore! And do you know how I did that?- Because I fucking LOVED STORIES, I read 3-5 books a week despite taking longer than other kids, I wrote those fanfics despite every second word being marked red by spellcheck. And lo and behold I got better at it! You don’t have to be the fasted or the best at the beginning (you don’t EVER need to become the best at it but be assured you will get better), you don’t need to be able to do things without assistance like a correction software or speech to text (that is actually assistance instead of doing the work for you), it dosnt even matter if you have a significant disadvantage due to some form of disability/learning disorder.

If you genuinely WANT to create art or study a topic or write an interesting think piece, you can ALWAYS do that to the best of your abilities! And even if you genuinely think it sucks, it is already better than anything generative AI frankensteined together because it contains your original idea, something new that has never existed before. And you yourself have gone through the experience of creating it, you will know that you are capable of doing this and that is the best feeling in the world. And the next time you do it it will already be a little more easy. Even if we are talking about “bothersome” acts of creation that you genuinely don’t want to do like university papers/homework: at this point it is easier and faster for me to just sit down and write an essay exactly the way I want it, then it would be to type in a prompt so neatly specified that it approximately generates what I want and then having to manually correct all the details that don’t work for me. You can be FASTER AND BETTER at the task then a computer and you’ll have that ability for the rest of your life to rely on, isn’t that neat and way more effective?

If I -a bitch with ‘can’t write can’t read’-disorder can become a prolific bookworm and “weird kid who sits in the corner and writes gothic poems during recess”, then YOU have no fucking excuse to let your creative brain be replaced by a fucking machine!

Hey, you reblogged that AI post and I was surprised to see something so mean on your blog. "If you cant write unassisted, fuck you, youre a disgrace to the community." Is that really something you want on your blog?

Just in case this isn't a spam message:

Posting AI-generated content to a platform intended to be an archive for writers is not appropriate use of the platform. On a platform intended for human creation, it is rude and inappropriate to clog search results with AI-produced content which often plagiarizes the work of human authors.

Use of generative AI is also horrible for our environment, leading to massive waste of fossil fuel energy and water. We should not be doing damage to our planet for the sake of generating (robot-produced, often plagiarized) fiction, especially when the joy of fiction comes from the creation and emotion of real people.

Rather than giving a prompt to a generative AI, people should consider attempting to write their own work, or asking another writer from the fandom if they would be interested in writing it. Anyone who is capable of typing a prompt into ChatGPT is capable of writing a story. The first attempts may not be amazing, but that is true of any skill, and anyone can improve with time and practice - and while ChatGPT may give you big returns in your time, it doesn't give you practice, growth, or creativity, which is where the joy of writing should come from.

[reasonsforhope]

"Kat Abughazaleh, a 26-year-old running for Congress in Illinois’ 9th congressional district, isn’t shy about her belief that politicians need to do things differently.

“We have a representation problem,” the first line of the “About” page on her website reads.

“As in, about half of Congress are millionaires and people born before the Moon landing. And that's part of the reason we're in this mess: Our leaders are out of touch.”

A journalist, social media influencer, and political commentator that GQ called “a lefty,” with a mission to revitalize the Democratic party, Abughazaleh built a following online before she launched her campaign in March of 2025. 

But now, she’s leveraging her platform — and campaign dollars — to help people in her community before ballots are even filled in.

“My congressional campaign is feeding people right now,” she starts in a recent TikTok video. 

“Part of the reason I decided to run was because I saw how much money gets wasted in politics, and I thought, ‘What if we spent it differently?’”

She adds that the campaign is focused on “direct action and mutual aid,” emphasizing that she wanted her run for office to be “dual-purpose,” in which she can get her message out and help people in the process. 

It’s a stark pivot from the traditional way of campaigning in the United States, which often includes pricey fundraising galas, attack ads, big billboards, and perhaps the most criticized and unpopular feature: massive donations from private businesses and interest groups. 

Abughazaleh has publicly congratulated the former incumbent of this seat — 80-year-old Rep. Jan Schakowsky, who has held the title since 1999, the year Abughazaleh was born — for her “decades of service.” 

Rep. Schakowsky will not seek reelection, but Abughazaleh called for others to run, hoping to participate in the “first competitive Democratic primary in the District since 1998.”

Abughazaleh has also shared that the average donation her campaign receives is $31. And according to GQ, 1,000 people signed up to volunteer for her campaign within a week of her initial announcement.

And while that volunteering does include marketing, canvassing, and getting the word out, it mostly adds up to actual on-the-ground volunteer work to help people in the local community.

“Our kick-off event, for instance, didn’t charge $500 a plate,” Abughazaleh shared in her TikTok. “People just had to bring a box of pads or tampons, which were donated to Chicago’s period collective. By the end of the night, we had gathered over 5,600 period products, which went to people who can’t afford them.”

Most recently, the campaign hosted a food drive for a local community fridge program.

“We asked folks to come out and donate food in exchange for a campaign yard or window sign,” Abughazaleh said. “And by the end of the day, we were able to fully stock the empty pantry and fill the fridge with frozen meals, produce, and eggs. That’s feeding people right now.”

“Don’t worry, we checked to make sure this is legal," she added. "And it is."

The campaign has also launched a High School Public Serve Grant program that encourages local youth to submit ideas for how to make the community better, and Abughazaleh’s campaign will support it with money, materials, volunteers, and her online platform...

“Something you’ll rarely see is concrete help in their communities during the campaign,” she said. “And frankly, to me, that just seems stupid. Not only do you get to help people — supposedly what you’re running to do — but it also shows what you’re about, instead of just providing lip service.” ...

“If every campaign adopted this model, then we wouldn’t be wasting money every single cycle. Every city, town, and village across America would be improved by their election process, and I think it would also get people more involved,” she said.

“We have local folks who have never voted in an election, but they joined our volunteer Discord server because they want to help, they feel like they have something to vote for.”

For those who might be inspired enough to run for office with this model, she says: Full steam ahead.

“Frankly, I would love it if other campaigns took our model. Use it, pretend it’s yours, I don’t care!” she wrapped up her TikTok. 

“Pair with organizations in your community that have been doing the work, talk with local experts, and try to spearhead any initiatives you can to show your values and help your constituents. It’s really that easy.”

-via GoodGoodGood, May 14, 2025

[shoutsofmybones]

Do you have any recommendations on how to proceed or start to make a psychosis plan? Maybe especially for religious people?

I do! This post will be lengthy, but if you want to be prepared for the real possibility of psychosis, I think it's all important.

First of all, something that I believe ALL people should have, regardless of their risk factors, is a psychiatric advance directive (PAD). Think of it as a living will, but specifically for mental health treatment. In the USA, in many places it is legally binding, and protects you from coercive or forceful psychiatric treatment, particularly treatments that you might be pressured to consent to while you're vulnerable.

Second, talk to someone you trust (a family member, close friend, or life partner) about how you would like them to respond in the case of a psychiatric emergency. Designate at least one person to take point on helping you receive treatment in a psychiatric emergency. Psychosis not only makes it difficult to make decisions for yourself, but it also makes other people (including mental healthcare professionals) not trust or respect the decisions you do make. Find someone who you trust to treat you with respect.

Third, do research ahead of time about the psychosis programs in your area! If there's a First Episode program nearby, then make sure you know how to get in touch with them. These programs can really make a difference, and in about a third of cases they're able to help patients never have a psychotic episode again. However, a lot of primary care doctors and even therapists don't know about them, or don't think to refer you to them. If you have designated someone to help you in case of psychosis, ask them to fight like hell for you to get into the First Episode program. It's life changing.

For a religious person, I really recommend making a personal creed or list of beliefs you hold, and keeping it close and accessible. I have one on my phone. It helps to know what you believe, because psychosis, particularly religious psychosis, can really get that mixed up. An extremely common symptom of psychosis is confusion, and in religious psychosis that can make your religious beliefs get confused as well, and that can be really difficult. Also, it's just fun and comforting to have a creed, I actually just recommend that whether or not you're making a psychosis plan.

Another rec for religious people: identify prayers you find calming and comforting and write them down. I like finding prayers from the saints. Specifically avoid anything that invites mysticism. I know there are a lot of mystics on this site but I'm actually very serious, mysticism is very close to psychosis in the brain and it can be a trigger for increased symptoms. This definitely includes the Jesus prayer.

Above all, I think the best preparation for psychosis is working on the stigma you probably have absorbed regarding psychosis and its effects. Even in neurodiversity affirming spaces, there can be a lot of stigmatizing language used about people with psychosis! You should read personal accounts of psychosis and recovery. Talk to people who are in psychosis, or have been in psychosis, about their lives and experiences. In my country, there is currently a rise in psychotic episodes and conditions due to use of certain substances, and yet there remains a huge stigma against talking about it. Make sure you learn and internalize that psychosis is not life-ruining, it does not define a person, and it doesn't make someone "one of the bad ones." Psychosis is just another facet of the human condition, and it's not by definition the worst case scenario. If you do end up experience psychosis, you are still valuable, still worthy, and still loved! Always keep that in mind.

This post is kind of long, but I hope it's helpful. I feel very passionately about this topic because I have been in a treatment program for psychosis for several years, and through that I have met a lot of people who wish they had made a plan ahead of time. Best of luck to you!

[mimiaguilar-bansheebender]

When Jinshi finally presents MaoMao as his bride (he’s too invested to leave her as just a concubine) i would love that some more time has passed and she has had time to prove herself as a great physician’s assistant (maybe the first girl doctor a girl can dream).

Also i think it would be hilarious if the 3 princesses prepared her for the presentation and with all the makeup and a tad more grown up she looks even more like Fengxian and Lakan is a happy tearful fox cause his beautiful and intelligent wife lives on in their daughter 🥲

Also! Read my rambles about what i think the best ending for the series would be:

i think the best ending would be something like yeah they're still solving mysteries and being consulted till the end of their days. Like sure, she might get kidnapped/hurt once or twice every couple of years, but also people now know she is LaKan's daughter and KaZuigetsu's favourite so the instances have reduced significantly.

I also think that MaoMao is super necessary for Jinshi cause he would def be at an early grave without her. she needs to balance him and whack him in the head for him to take breaks and take care of himself; alternatively she also needs him to stop her from playing with smth like quicksilver, so they're even.

they can't have a happily ever after. it is not realistic with the times and with the life they lead. they can only have a fulfilling life next to each other, supporting the work they both do because they both know how much value what the other one does actually has. A key part of their partnership is that they definitely admire each other in that point! They're both extremely hardworking individuals with amazing gifts that have had to develop masks for their own safety, but they're also inherently very good people that will run themselves ragged for other and the greater good, to imagine them riding into the sunset and getting a cabin to bake bread and live lovey dovey lives would be a disservice to them.

So imagine my surprise when the author said they want to give an ending that portrayed a (life goes on) vibe and people rioted on reddit (???) like thay is such a weird thing. How can you read on and on a again about MaoMao getting happy and liking the palace life (specifically the impact and help she can provide) to the point she wanted to beg not to be fired WAAAAY at the beginning; or about Jinshi running himself ragged to the point of extreme exhaustion, weight loss and passing out from sheer fatigue, just trying to fix and help the nation. To read them all reminiscence after wards like, we were dumb dumbs but we helped a lot of people, cue happy faces and think; yeah they def need to ride into the sunset! (like ???) These babies thrive of the work they do, to cut them off is to make them feel like their worth is diminished.

Is not that they like being recognized by their work, but they like the value their work gives their life and more importantly; they like to actively make the country and the palace a better place.

So when the time comes for the light novels to finish the only thing i wanna see is LaKan being a happy mess, cause his baby girl made it.

She is what Fengxian's life should've looked like in the best scenario. Had circumstances been different for them both, he would've come back and been able to buy her out and then she would've been the menace she was meant to be as the La Lady. But again, the time and the life they both led did not allow for that. Am i saying that they would've a fairytale life if he had been able to buy her? No! Let's remember most people either fear him or want him out of the way, they is no way to guarantee no one would've plotted against her or against baby MaoMao. They had a Happy-ish ending, where she knew she had been loved and he would never look at anyone but her, but she was already weak, sick and did not live long.

So MaoMao climbing ranks as rapidly as she did (let's remember she started out as a mere servant girl and Jinshi has been pushing to even the field since he made her take that first exam) LaKan will just see a small what if. Cause to him, Fengxian lives through their baby, she is every bit as cunning and beautiful, and while they were robbed of time and a better outcome by the times and his blindness, their baby just might make it.

He will make sure she can have a happier life than him or her Mom had, because the circumstances of their romance robbed her of a happy childhood, but also made her the woman she is today.

[charliegyrth]

Speedos - 2 of 2

The Off-Season Continues

Read Part 1 here.

“How was the pool?” Micah asked when I stepped in the door.

“Refreshing.”

He raised an eyebrow. He knew I was lying. I wasn’t gone very long, and my hair was dry. He didn’t ask me what happened, though. (If he had, I definitely wouldn't have told him about how my jiggling body had given me an embarrassing erection in front of everybody.)

I collapsed onto the couch and turned on the TV. A bag of chips was waiting on the table in front of me. I knew I shouldn’t, but I grabbed it and ripped it open.

Micah sat next to me. “Are you excited about next Thursday?”

“What’s next Thursday?” I asked. Then it hit me. “Oh. It’s Thanksgiving already!”

Last year, we went to my parents’ house, so this year we were visiting Micah’s mom. I was excited.

“I asked Mom what we should bring, and she said to surprise her. So what do you think? Out of everything I’ve cooked for us, what’s your favorite?”

“Your scalloped potatoes,” I said automatically. My sudden answer surprised me. I looked down at the potato chips in my hand. And I saw the snack cakes on the table. And I saw the curve of my belly under my shirt. Slowly, I looked back up at Micah and said, “I need to lose weight.”

“What? Where’d that come from?”

I hated how surprised he sounded. Acting all innocent, as if he had nothing to do with all this new fat. “It came from you!”

“Is that what you think?” Still playing dumb.

“You’re telling me that you haven’t noticed this?” I grabbed my stomach roll and wobbled it up and down. Never in my life would I have thought I’d be able to freaking wobble myself like that.

“I have,” he said, placing his hand on my shoulder. “But I’m not… I mean… Do you think I’m trying to make you fat?”

“Aren’t you?”

He flinched at the accusation. “Of course not. I’m trying to make you happy. Months ago, when I saw you scarf down that speedo cake, I knew how much you’d been depriving yourself, and how much you wanted to eat. I give you food because you like it, because it makes you happy.”

“But…”

“You’re eating potato chips right now. Is that my fault?”

“No,” I admitted. I’d grabbed those myself. “But you hid my speedo!”

“What? I put it in the closet. Isn’t that where it's supposed to go?”

I breathed out a long sigh. I’d misinterpreted everything. Micah was giving me food to keep me happy, not to make me fat. “Sorry.”

He squeezed my shoulder. “Don’t be. I can see how you’d think that. I’ll stop cooking so much, if that’s what you want.”

“That’s what I want.”

“Okay. But just know, I think you’re the most handsome man I’ve ever met. And that’ll always be true, no matter what size you are.” To prove he meant it, he placed his hands on my rounded stomach and kissed me.

“I love you, Micah.”

He slid on top of me, running his fingers through my hair. The bag of potato chips fell to the ground.

“This afternoon, I’ll get rid of all your snacks. Though that might be hard, with the holiday season and all.”

Oh. He had a point.

“Actually,” I said between kisses, “maybe I can start my diet in January. What do you say?”

“If that’s what you want.” He pulled off my shirt and gave my flab a single, loving kiss.

***

I woke up at eleven, my head throbbing from all the champagne. Today was January 1, the official end to the holiday season. Classes wouldn’t resume until the 8th, so I’d have a week to really focus on my health.

The last few months had been absolutely wonderful. Thanksgiving with Micah’s family was a nonstop parade of laughter, games, and food. Tons of food. (His mom was an even better cook than Micah, and that’s saying something.) Then we did our finals (all good) and spent Christmas break in a rental house over in Solvang, this really cute tourist-trap town that transformed itself into a winter wonderland.

I was so glad that I didn’t start my diet yet, because I would’ve been miserable. Everywhere we went, I was surrounded by cookies and pastries, and each one was better than the last. Micah constantly asked if I wanted something, and I constantly said yes.

I was finally allowing myself to give in to the season, something I’d never really done before. I was just so happy all the time, and Micah was happy because I was happy. It was… It was wonderful.

But today was the day I’d start getting my life back on track. I trudged into the bathroom to take stock of my reflection (something I’d avoided for months). I wasn’t surprised by my reflection, but it did sadden me. I had a definite belly now. I had moobs. My hips were massive. I’d grown rolls along my sides, and another one just under my chest. My face was rounder (not by a lot) and I had zero muscle definition now. Literally anywhere.

I did not look like a competitive swimmer.

I trudged into the living room, where Micah was watching the news. I’d grown accustomed to waking up to another one of Micah’s delicious breakfasts, but nothing was waiting for me this time.

“Morning, babe,” he said from the couch. “There’s oatmeal in the pantry if you want.”

That used to be my go-to breakfast, but now it sounded so insubstantial. The last few months hadn’t just changed my body; they’d changed my hunger, too. It would take a while to get back to normal.

I plodded to the kitchen and microwaved a bowl of plain oatmeal. I leaned against the counter and took one bite.

Awful. No taste at all.

So I added a few sprinkles of sugar. That helped a little, but it still wasn’t enough. I added a little more. And a little more. Soon, the bowl was more sugar than oatmeal, but at least it was palatable. It took me less than a minute to eat the whole thing. I looked around for a chocolate chip cookie, but the jar was empty. Micah had cleared out all our sweets, just as I’d asked him to.

I trudged back into the living room, ignoring the loud rumbles from my stomach.

“Nate? You okay?”

I sat next to him, trying (and failing) to hide my sour expression.

He asked me another question, but I was too hungry and petulant to pay attention. That’s when he nudged me in the side, sending a wave through my belly fat. “Nate. Come on. You’re not gonna do this to me again, are you?”

“Do what?”

Instead of answering me, he grabbed his phone from the table and snapped my photo. Then he made me look at the image.

The picture made my face look even fatter than I’d realized. My double chin was on full display. “Yeah. That’s what I look like now.”

“And this is what you looked like yesterday.” He swiped to another photo, showing me at the New Year’s party grinning from ear-to-ear.

The pictures were like night and day. I was fat in both, but I looked so much happier in the second one.

“If you want to lose weight,” Micah said, “go for it. But don’t be miserable. It’s off-season.”

“Okay,” I said. I still had months to get back into shape. I could go slowly. I could still indulge a little.

Micah smiled. “Thank you. And in case you’re wondering, I didn’t get rid of our Christmas cookies. I just stuck them in the back of the pantry.”

I jumped to my feet.

***

Micah was scrolling through his phone when I waddled through the front door with a bag in my hands. It was from BXL, the plus-size clothing store. “Hey, Micah! Look what I bought!”

He ran over and dug through the bag, expecting that I’d gotten him a present. I didn’t.

“A speedo?” He held up the huge, blue fabric. “But… you said you decided not to compete this year.”

“Obviously,” I said, slapping my hanging gut. I couldn’t make it across the pool if my life depended on it. Besides, the season started months ago. “But I’d like to go swimming again. It’s time.”

“Okay?” he said, a bit confused. I hadn’t been in a pool since I broke the school record last September. I can’t even remember the last time I even mentioned swimming.

“So? What do you say? Would you like to go for a dip?”

“I’d love to.”

An hour later, we arrived at the community pool on the other side of town. (I had lost access to the university’s pool after I quit the team. And while a part of me really wanted all my old teammates to see me now, it was probably for the best.)

Micah stripped off his shirt, revealing his pale, freckled stomach. He’d softened up a little in the last few months (either from my influence or from the constant supply of snacks around the house), and I thought his starter belly looked really cute.

He sat on the pool chair next to me so I could lather him with sunscreen. “When we get in there, I think we should race.”

“You know I’m a champion swimmer, right? I’ll beat you hands down.”

That made us both laugh.

Then, after I rubbed him down, he turned around and stripped off my shirt. All my new rolls flopped out.

“Good thing you bought the extra-large bottle of sunscreen,” I joked.

He took special care to reach into all my creases. When he got to my moobs, he looked me in the eyes and asked, “Do you miss it?”

“Do I miss being hungry and moody for half the year? Not at all.”

It took him a while to rub down all my extra flesh. I think he was just savoring the moment. When he was done, he gave me an encouraging pat on my gut and said, “Okay, big guy. Let’s swim.”

I stood up and peeled off my shorts, revealing my new speedo. There weren’t a lot of people at the pool, but everyone who was there glanced over at me. I tried to ignore their judgmental looks, because I didn’t want to get hard. Besides, it didn’t matter what they thought. The only person I cared about was standing right in front of me.

“How do I look?” I stepped back so he could get a better view of my 260-pound body.

“You know how hot you are. Do I even need to say it?”

He was right. I knew I was beautiful. I knew that this was the body that made me happy. Sure, I would’ve preferred a more solid gut instead of the hanging apron I’d grown, but whatever. More softness meant more parts for Micah to play with. And yeah, the stretchmarks on my love handles weren’t my favorite, but they were already starting to fade.

I used to be a gorgeous swimmer. I used to be lean, and sleek, and powerful. Now, I was so much more.

“Is the speedo okay?”

He laughed. “Nate, I can barely see it.”

I guess that was for the best. Now, if all my jiggling got me hard again, people were less likely to notice.

Micah and I walked to the pool, and together, we jumped into the deep end.

The End

Thanks so much to Anonymous for the suggestion. There's nothing hotter than a fat swimmer bulging out of his clothes.

[obsidianpen]

I saw your comment on BG being a dark romance versus NG not really being able to claim the label, and it occurred to me I think that's part of what I like about NG? I'm also in the same camp of readers who argued that NG was less emotionally distressing than H&H, so make of that what you will.

The short version of this is just that I'm not really a fan of the dark romance genre (no shade to people who are, it's just not for me) and I like NG because I fundamentally agree that it's not actually a dark romance, at its core.

The longer version of this is that I would argue NG is not a romance, full stop. Does it have romantic leads? Yes. Does the plot center itself around their interactions and developing relationship? Yes. Is it a romance?

I would argue not, and for one key reason:

Harry doesn't like Voldemort.

Harry may manipulate or seduce, may challenge or cajole, but all of this is really a means to an end. He has some scant fondness for Voldemort, kind of, in select circumstances, but the reality is that if you gave him a "make Voldemort stop existing with no major consequences" button, he would smash that thing before you could even blink. He might not want to kill Voldemort, but Harry's closeness to him right now is primarily practical.

Voldemort, by contrast and against all his better judgement, genuinely likes Harry. He craves his approval and attention, and would likely be absolutely gutted to think too hard about how mercenary Harry's relationship with him truly is.

I say this as someone who's sitting on the sidelines with popcorn, rooting against all odds that somehow these two will work... something... out. But there's not actually a foundation of mutual interest upon which a romance novel is typically built.

For this reason, I'd argue that NG is probably closer in genre to dystopian fantasy. The dystopia is told through the relationship of Harry and Voldemort, pushing the societal ills of the Wizarding World into pretty glaring view for the audience, but that doesn't actually make their relationship romantic (in the modern sense of the word).

I was pretty conflicted on whether or not NG followed the hallmark of Austenian romance, whereby loving someone fundamentally changes your perception of the world, and I think my answer on this is that it is certainly changing Voldemort's, but not Harry's. Voldemort is busy having the foundations of his world shook every time Harry walks in the room; Harry, meanwhile, doesn't have the freedom to even think his own emotions privately. Under those conditions, love, for Harry, is a freedom he simply can't afford.

The one-sidedness of Voldemort's affections doesn't produce a romance from an audience perspective -- it highlights the disturbing disparities in the Wizarding World's "glorious" new dystopia.

Maybe I'm wrong, because I am due for a re-read, but overall I think that NG intentionally sacrifices a lot of its traditional romantic tropes to further a complex narrative of power, justice, and mercy (on both the individual level and the societal) and I think as a book, it's come out the stronger for it.

I think you are pretty spot on - but I am SO overdue for a reread myself at this point lmao I am not fine tuned on the details at all myself. I want to say Harry’s feelings are a little - a lot? - more nuanced and confusing than that. I’d say he does kind of like Voldemort. Sometimes. For fleeting moments. It’s more that he fundamentally loathes what he stands for, what he’s done, and what he’s doing, and simultaneously finds him physically attractive (now - he went hard with that monster comment), and well that whole soul bond and having an intimate relationship sure makes things messy af huh. God I need to read whatever the fuck I wrote

[hellothisisangle]

Relationship Analysis

Prefacing this by admitting I had to rewrite a good chunk of River’s side of things. He’s notoriously underdeveloped (a little like another character from a different game I’ve played recently- sound familiar?) The actual relationship jump is marked with an arrow a bit below, here’s some backstory

↓

V would never willingly work with a cop. They’ve been disillusioned enough by the system and the people who enforce it to build their life on chaos and middle fingers. But the job that lead to River was backed by the kind of money that made V bite their tongue, swallow the “ACAB”, and resist the urge to spit on the guy’s polished boots. Doesn’t mean there wasn’t more than a few off-color statements thrown out there though. River barely rolled his eyes, didn’t instigate. He was a model lawmen, like something out of a movie. Actually, too much like a movie. Because when the preliminary investigation of the Peralez’s case [I FOUGHT THE LAW] came to a close and River’s superiors told him to stop pursuing, V could tell this was another one of those NCPD cover-up situations.

“Exactly what I expect from donut munchers. Good thing my client is an independent contract,” V snidely remarked.

“I’ll take this to the top if I have to,” River said with conviction.

So, so virtuous. Then, another distraught call came from the Peralezes [DREAM ON]. They’d had a suspicious break in, needed a professional to look into it. V shows up, and who’s already on-site, all badge-and-honor attitude? River fucking Ward. Again. Definitely not because the NCPD told him to, so what- Out of the goodness of his heart?

“You make it sound like it’s something to be ashamed of,” River sighed.

(…) “Not something you come across in this city,” V pointed out. “And especially not in cops.”

Somehow, V is able to get more information, why River is really doing this. He’s not a stranger to home invasions, lived it first hand, lost both his parents. He doesn’t want to see another family torn apart. River is starting to seem more like a person than a one-dimensional neon sign that reads, ‘I believe in the law’. If there’s anyone who could get V to even remotely reconsider the idea that not every badge is a pig, it just might be River.

They managed to track down the Peralez’s boogeymen together, although the case involved more victims than just the affluent family who hired them, and seems to somehow be related to a power with ties to the NCPD. River immediately wants to go full whistleblower. He’s talking protective custody, full exposure. V raises an eyebrow. It isn’t only the Peralezes being monitored- strings all across Night City are being pulled. And if River wants to trigger a massacre just to save the few people in front of them, that blood’s on him. On the other hand, if the Peralezes fork over however much they think their lives are worth, V isn’t complaining- V could give a shit about politicians. River, ever the believer, insists he’ll take the information back to the station- see if he can’t orchestrate protection for everyone. Noble, but stupid, V thinks.

Afterwards, V gets a call from a mysterious number- a scrambled voice telling them to detour from this trail they’re following. V attempts to check in with the Peralezes- the line has gone cold. V then contacts River, who sounds a little different over the holo, kind of forced. He requests to meet in person. Chubby Buffalo’s BBQ in The Glen. V already got their pay, they wanted to wipe their hands of this whole thing, but curiosity got the better of them. And what does River have to say? He got canned. Tossed out by a system he believed in. V? They laugh. Double over. Find it darkly poetic. The guy who walked the line, booted the second it became inconvenient.

River doesn’t think it’s so funny. His parents’ murderer that was never brought to justice, the Peralezes, the countless other investigations swept under the rug…

“So what’ll you do about it?” V asks.

“Become a PI,” River replies.

Fitting. Suits him better. He already owns the long leather trench. Some time later, V and River accomplish [THE HUNT] together. River is offered a position back on the force. To V’s surprise they turn it down.

↓

V is convinced to work a few private cases with River, split the profits, and the more they’re side by side, the more they notice the little details. A familiar broad frame. A voice too caring. A laugh a little too loud. Awkward. Earnest. The kind of man who tries to look away when V leans too close, but can’t help but blush and stiffen. V sees echos they’re not sure what to make of. They push River- how about bending a rule here and there? You ever use handcuffs for something off the books? And River gives. Slowly but surely. He thinks dipping his toe in the darkness to be with V isn’t so terrible. However, V isn’t a toe-dip. They’re a deep-dive into the black. River starts falling, answering texts too quickly, giving in too fast, can’t say “no” to V.

V teases him that his code of ethics had a weak spine. Internally, it catches them off guard. Maybe this is how people act when they really care about another person, without expecting something in return and all that. It’s not like V would know. And the look River has when V says something absolutely filthy with a straight face is kind of irresistible.

V thought they’d enjoy ruining him, pushing him past his limits just to say, “I told you so.” All the while, River’s still polite, still checks, asks, holds back before doing anything impulsive. Makes V want to unravel him completely, to see a raw side. But when it started happening for real, it didn’t feel as good as they imagined. Turns out River likes a grip on his wrists and V isn’t sure they’re in any position to be the one in control. The one to say “love me” when they could be gone tomorrow. Under normal circumstances, V wouldn’t mind stringing someone along. With River, he’s just too genuine. Maybe they like him because he somehow still sees something good in V, or maybe it’s because V’s scared no one else will as much as River. Not even themselves.

[sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth]

i ADORE glasses sam (per my bio)

but do you have any headcanons about sam’s glasses?

i think they are the cutest things but aren’t mentioned (or seen) aside from the hellhound thing. but i like to believe they are real !!

Ah yes. Sam with glasses.

For anyone who needs a little reminder:

Kinda crazy we only got them wearing glasses so few times in the show (and I don't even want to talk about that episode where Sam drinks the milkshake and goes crazy, cause that shit haunts me), considering they're constantly dressing up to hide their identities. Glasses seem like a helpful tool. Plus big old mustaches of course. 😄

I'm gonna be honest - I would buy him a slightly different pair. Any of these. I think he'd look absolutely delicious in any of those styles. What do you think?

And I haven't really thought much about Sam having glasses, which is why it took me a bit to answers this ask. But here's what I got after thinking about it for a little bit:

Weakness, or anything that could be interpreted as such, is a big no no in the Winchester household, as little as there is one. Scrape your knee? Walk it off. Watch a scary movie and can't sleep? Get it together. Feel the bottomless despair of this half life they all live, this endless state of being in-between, feel it so much it makes your bones shake? Deal with it. So when Sam's teacher sits him at the front of the class and asks him, after the bell rings and the other students are filtering out, if he's ever taken an eye test? Sam knows it's not something he will share that evening around the dinner table. Hell, they don't even have a dinner table right now. Just two beds and a couch. He walks home, stares off into the distance. At least he's not far-sighted. If he couldn't read anymore, or have trouble with it, Sam doesn't know what he would do then. But looking at stuff that's far away? He'll get his driver's licence soon, but it's not like his dad will ever let him drive the car. He's been able to work with it so far, so surely it won't be a problem, right? He sniffs, pulls his backpack higher. Not like there's much of a future to see anyway, his fifteen-year-old brain offers unhelpfully. So Sam never gets glasses. He just squints a little more. He gets some while he's at Stanford. A cheap pair that he's pretty sure doesn't have the right lens strength. It doesn't matter. He sits far back in the lecture hall, the numbers and letters seeming almost too sharp. He has to take them off when he walks back to the dorm, because they make him feel like he's walking on a rope, high above a circus crowd.

When Dean gets him and they leave Stanford, they end up somewhere among his things. When he finds them again, there's a big scratch in the right glass. He doesn't get them fixed for a long time. He's not wearing them, so why should he? He's not sure when or where he loses them. By the time he notices, they might have been gone for months, years even. He shrugs it off, even though he feels a weird nostalgia at the loss. And then when he and Dean hunt that hellhound, he puts on a pair again for the first time in he doesn't know how long. They're scorched with holy fire, so he and Dean can see the hell mutt. He can't help but chuckle when he puts them on, despite the entire situation being pretty dire. Dean puts on a pair too, and Sam immediately sees he picked the nicer ones. It's fine. Just for one night, he can pretend. It's actually pretty fun.

[tcoaal]

Should've sent this yesterday but ever felt like Renee ever felt guilty or remorse for anything she did to the kids? At all?

happy belated mother's day Renee wish the kids had killed you worse! anyways... that's an interesting question because like, it feels like you could make an argument for that based on two separate scenes but I'm much more inclined to believe she doesn't and that Renee was largely more uncomfortable when faced with the reality "I'm murdering my children for money" more than actual guilt or remorse for doing it. i used to think maybe she did when i first only played Chapter 1 but not anymore

so first in chapter 1 Renee seems to have some regret or hesitation about what she's doing, and then again in the 3a flashbacks she seems to have some hesitation to the point of having to ask if there's truly no chance the kids are going to live for assurance to go through with it

but also Renee's response when she's lead to believe the kids definitely died in a fire and they're 100% in the clear was to buy steaks and wine to have a celebration dinner. Renee's flashbacks shows her viewing her kids solely as Embarrassment and Disappointment in her internal narration. nothing about her actions after believing them to be dead hints at any kind of actual remorse in any capacity, only joy

Renee is a Tar Soul To-Be and i think these scenes are more like... Renee being uncomfortable with being confronted with the reality of what she's doing more than feeling guilty about it. something Nemlei talked about in that Q&A regarding Renee's original plan is noting that there are some similarities between them, and I think Insincere Catholic Guilt is definitely one of them. teen Andrew laments that he would turn himself if it would bring back Nina but justifies because it won't there's no reason to, there's a really great post about it here and I think Renee is kind of the same. this was still presumably early enough she could've gotten her kids out quicker, but the Surgeon says there's no way her kids are gonna make it. she knows the parasites aren't real. but this grand conspiracy with forces stronger than them has taken root... if her kids are going to die no matter what, shouldn't she get something, a compensation for the 22 years she spent on these hellions? it's going to happen no matter what, even if she warns them, they'll probably prevent them from leaving right?

that's just how i read these scenes. i think if Renee felt actual genuine remorse she would've probably like, more calmly accepted her fate in chapter 2, you know? like, ha. i tried to kill my own kids. of course they're going to kill me and their father. i had this coming. of course the situation was fucked beyond belief, but that's my personal take. if Renee had been a full Tar Soul i doubt she would've been uncomfortable facing the reality of it though. what Renee really wants is both justification for her actions and to be able to turn a blind eye to the reality of what it cost

you could say that maybe she was written to be harsher than initially intended when the early game was still out before chapter 2 and some aspects of her changed just a little bit, but i doubt Nemlei would've done that and i think her character has been pretty consistent. i suppose you could also argue the first scene isn't reliable as it was solely from Ashley's POV and Ashley shows throughout the game (and especially in 3A) she has an odd relationship with wanting her mother's attention despite hating her and that this might've been more being shown from her perspective alone and that Renee was harsher, but unless Burial shows Ashley misremembering things from the past with her own rose-tinted filter i find it really unlikely. everything in this paragraph is purely just wild mass guessing speculation

tl;dr: no i think she's just uncomfortable being confronted with the reality of her actions like Andrew usually is because she also wants to believe she's a normal person in normal society

[iojg]

Alright, let us get to work! I both dread these chains of long winded posts and love them, and this one is more so in particular -- I really enjoy what we are talking about, but I see here a great potential for talking past one each other. I sincerely hope we will be able to bypass that threat. To that end, I will do the "quoting a part of message and then answering" thing, but I will try not to split our conversation into several different topics we pursue in parallel. To achieve that, I will not quote you chronotopically, instead using quotes to sorta subtitle the parts of my whole argument. I also want to assure you that despite me not quoting large swaths of your post, I've read it in full multiple times before starting to write this, and I'll likely reread it after writing this sentence still. Without further delay,

It's What My Character Would Do

Firstly, I'd like to say that, as far as I understand, you don't hold any animosity towards the hypothetical quoted player here, despite the stated infamy. Rather I believe we both agree that it is a matter of mismanaged expectation between the player and the GM: the first wants to advocate for her character, the second wants to tell her story, which she prepped. I want then to *go on the record* and state that I will from this point speak mainly about games in which "saying what your character does" is the crux of the game -- in my preferred style of game this is THE fun part. Now, I will say something that I believe will underscore the whole matter of our disagreement, and which will be, essentially, my thesis: I believe that there is a kind of prep damaging to this play, and a kind of prep conductive to it, all while there is a kind of improv that is damaging and a kind that is conductive too. I don't believe that the important line lies between prep or no prep here at all.

When that decision was made - right now, or in last night's prep - doesn't matter. What matters is when it's spoken into reality in front of the other players.

Now, I think you are missing something rather important right here. I think the missed part is the most important thing about SIS (I would myself just say "fiction", but I enjoy your partiality to that anachronism, so let's stick to it!) and that it is *how it is managed*. That is, who, how and when gets to decide what is part of SIS and what isn't. I think this social situation surrounding SIS is the most important and meaningful because it is way more uncontroversially real than its interior. Whether GM gets to make up that there is a village in a middle of play is a matter social relations between real people, just as in general who gets to speak when and about what exactly.

The work of a really well-prepared GM who's really good at running a pre-planned game will be largely indistinguishable from the work of a really good 0-prep GM who has instead learned to build the game on the fly. ... However, the accepted default is an extremely high-prep approach, and that high-prep approach often leads to negative outcomes... That's what I'm pushing back against, right?

For my money, actually, there is nearly zero distinction between the two in practice, as far the social situation is concerned, because what is happening there in both cases is that GM assumes a role of some sort of entertaining storyteller by taking control of the story, and making it go wherever she likes. In the first case, she predetermines the matter before play. In the second case, she decides where the story goes on the fly. But the sitch is basically the same if you squint a bit: the important part is that *she decides*.

The kind of play I enjoy, the story does not go where GM wants, the story follows established fiction (contains of SIS). Counter-intuitively, I think GM deciding what's the most fun thing to happen would be is the most ruinous thing to fun here, because it is completely unsupportive of my favourite "It's What My Character Would Do!" style of play, because it relies upon there being emergent consequences for character action. Otherwise, what is happening is quantum ogre sans prep: whatever the characters do, GM makes *whatever is fun* happen. The fact that she doesn't know before the game isn't what's important, what's important is that she *decides*. And to clarify, the problem is not that she doesn't take into account what is fun for the players or not, that's besides the point. The story made up by GM on the fly for the players' tastes is still a story made up by GM. No *finding out* is happening.

Just as you, I imagine here the most extreme scenario possible. You can obviously, for example, establish the situation in full during the first 20 minutes of play, agreeing that what will be collectively made up there is what the game is about. Or, more radically, you can improv it during the first few sessions of play, and then gradually shift to explore it, the way Apocalypse World plays out when done close to text. But if your desired style of play is not GM's story, the shift must occur at some point, and it might just occur between prep and first session.

Now, another important thing is that spreading the GM role around doesn't really help. I will not elaborate at this time, because the whole reply is starting to tire me out, but such measure just basically shifts the problem to game being shared by several storytellers. Still not playing to find out by my definition.

At this moment, I have my attention span killing my ability to write further. I hope it's not too insulting how I practically ignored your second part of the post, but I hope you can see that if I do so at that time the conversation will get really unwieldy. If it's not too much to ask, please tell me if I really need to address some concern of yours before you can honestly reply to me, and I will do so. Again, sorry for not being thorough, and for not ending my response properly!

writing intricate backstories is the playerside equivallent of the gm prep burden

[fyreflys]

If Katniss in district 13  had to interact with Lou Lou like body doubles of her and Peeta what impact would it have on her perceptions of hijacked Peeta in the sense of Hijacked Peeta being closer to the original Peeta then the body doubles?

Okay I’ve read this several times and think I understand what it’s asking? (I could be wrong)

In other words: What would Katniss’s reaction be if she met body doubles of her & Peeta in district 13? And how would her feelings on Hijacked Peeta change as a result?

So. I think Katniss would be shocked and horrified. And also probably terrified, because this means she can easily be replaced if she doesn’t act how Coin wants her to. However I’m not sure people like Boggs, Plutarch, or Haymitch (especially Haymitch) would allow Coin to do something like that. They would be like “hell no!”

As for how she’d feel about Peeta. I think she’d be more upset; the real Peeta seems to hate her, and the fake Peeta isn’t anything like Peeta. I think it might draw them together more, in a way. I don’t think Katniss would be able to see the fake Peeta as anything other than a poor tortured soul who she has no connection with. I could see her reaching out to be nice to the doubles, like how Haymitch and Maysilee & Wyatt did with Lou Lou, but I think she’d be too freaked out to form an actual relationship with him. As soon as they got the real Peeta back, she’d be quick to try and make amends with him I think, because she wants the real thing.

[azaharinflames]

If we don't get something for BuckTommy in the finale than I feel it would be healthier for me to just put down the show.

I don't know if I'll be able to do it but I do think maybe it's better for me to just leave the show to the Buddies. They have their army, their journos are their generals, and they will never stop, never relent, even if the show never gives them what they want.

With all my heart I believe the very best they will ever get is some one-sided confession from Buck at the very last episode of the series. Maybe on his deathbed. But those are wilfully blind will not see.

And the show will probably never shut them down properly. It got close in the last few episodes, and maybe it can still pull the trigger in the finale and send them spiralling off into the void. Here's hoping. But if they don't, then I don't see how this to and fro can continue for me.

I can't watch with their fandom as a bugbear on my back. I want to talk and read about the show but there is literally no space where they aren't being generally awful.

They really are close to breaking down the last of my resistance. I want to stay out of obstinance, because I know that it's exactly their goal to destroy people's hope, but it's just so hard.

Really need Tommy to be in the finale in a real way or else the relationship dropped. I can hold on to hope if there's something tangible to hold on to. I can throw away all hope and just hang around as an unrepentant hater of the show, or leave entirely. But this liminal space where the show can't make up it's mind is torturous.

They either need to give me something or tell me to fuck off so I can actually have an emotional reaction.

Sorry that this ended up being a stream of consciousness.

don’t worry, nonnie, it made sense. and i have to agree and share the sentiment. and i’m happy you can vent here <3

I don’t necessarily share the part of buddie with you. mostly because i refuse to think about them or give them that power, tbh. though i will agree that they are not getting buddie canon, and atp, and especially after last episode, that’s painfully obvious.

so. does it matter if the ‘journos’ are on their side? if bts sometimes posts them? if they’re sent together to do promo (which i will argue it’s not a ‘gift’ to them but them doing promo)? the show is clearly telling them something, as much as we can argue that they still give them small things. if you watch the show it’s rather obvious how they feel about them. therefore leaving to me is not giving them a victory. it’s knowing that it wouldn’t even be a battle to be had, because we exist in two different realms.

that being said. i am waiting on 818 to fully determine what i do with this show.

and to be quite honest, this is not entirely about bucktommy. partly, it is, because i would hate to feel like i’ve been dragged along for this long without a proper reason to - because to bring back tommy after 806 and keep him around for the whole season when there was no reason for it, if they just want him to suddenly disappear is cruel. and it would definitely put me off the show, if anything just because i wouldn’t want my time to be wasted like that.

but it is more than that to me. it would be wasted time, but also it would be watching a show that is hit after hit to my favorite character, with no pay-off or any type of joy. it would be rewarding the behaviors around buck, even, and showing that the way they treated him was right. and i’m simply not okay with that, and i wouldn’t be okay with watching the show if that happened.

ultimately, it would be me being tired of seeing a show that goes nowhere, because that’s how it would feel. and knowing when to stop if it doesn’t bring me joy anymore.

not to say 818 will be bad. i don’t think it will be. but just. in a hypothetical case, i agree.

[sparkletastic-cookiedough]

The worst part about polling is that I’m rarely able to answer simple questions with simple answers. Hence why I wrote an entire essay about your question instead.

This post has some vague spoilers for Yellowjackets Season 1, but it’s honestly so vague I’d struggle to call it a spoiler. I list a few examples of media where people die, but I do it in such vague terms that nothing is actually said.

My reaction to death in media really depends. A lot of my favorite fics are all very comedic, and would use an unexpected death as a source for a lot of jokes. Macabre humor, very Addams family style. I wouldn’t care much, and the character might even come back as a ghost later in the story.

I don’t think that’s quite what you’re asking about.

Death is a complicated thing when it comes to writing. It’s the ultimate tragedy, it’s the ending of a character’s journey.

Written poorly, death feels arbitrary. It feels like something that happened because the author ran out of ideas.

(I have to confess to using death to cut a story short, but that was for a class project that had a due date. I simply couldn’t spend another fifty hours working on the project, there wasn’t time for that).

Used well, death feels purposeful. It can wreck you emotionally. A death can be the entire point of the work, written into fate from the moment the characters were first on the page.

Sometimes, though, a death isn’t the best option for dramatic effect. There are many tales of tragedy or horror that end on fates far worse than death. Orpheus doesn’t die at the end of Hadestown, but I am still wrecked by his fate. Some of the most haunting episodes of Twilight Zone end in a purgatory of endless suffering.

When it comes to Ao3, I don’t usually go for longer works that focus on slow-burn drama. That’s not my cup of tea. For my beloved handful of longer dramatic pieces I am subscribed to, the death of a major supporting character would be a step of growth for the main character. I’d be intrigued on how the author intends to write through the process of grief.

It feels almost instinctual for a writer to place a death at the end of a story- death can be more interesting placed at the beginning or somewhere in the middle. Does a characters death mark raising stakes (Yellowjackets S1E10 does this really well, but it’s also a plot point in most slasher horror films.)? Perhaps it’s the inciting incident for a revenge plot (I’m pretty sure this is the plot of John Wick, but I haven’t seen it). Perhaps it’s the death of the home they once knew, giving them no choice but to journey in a different direction (Star Wars, Lion King). Perhaps the death of a companion is the consequence of a main characters foolishness, a permanent reminder to not make the same mistakes again (this is in a book about wizards, I just can’t remember what it’s called right now. It’s also Yellowjackets S1E10). That last one is a bit delicate. The entire point is that the death is preventable, which might be aggravating for people.

Naturally, some people may not like media that features death. Some people might not like intense dramatic stakes. I’m one of these people sometimes. After a long day at work, I don’t want the emotional stress of being absolutely wrecked by tragedy.

If I’m in that mood, I don’t seek out content that would come near featuring death. I read fluffy comedies. It would be a massive tone shift to have a death played seriously in any sort of fluffy comedy piece- imagine if Phineas and Ferb had Candice die. That would break the plot. The piece would probably have to shift forever, no longer able to continue like those deaths didn’t happen. It would take a lot of good writing to return to a fluffy comedy after a death. It’s possible- the Simpsons has had multiple deaths- but it would be nearly impossible if it’s a major character (which is why they can’t kill off Homer Simpson).

No one is paying you to write fanfiction. You don’t have to conform to any sort of expectations. If you want to kill off every character to make a point, then do it. Who cares what your audience thinks? You’re making art. Sometimes the purpose isnt just to make people happy. Sometimes, characters have to die. Sacrifice your characters for the art.

[giantkillerjack]

Me: hm, I want something to put on the TV as background noise... Huh. Looks like YouTube is recommending something called The Last Unicorn. That's perfect, it's probably some old shitty animation that has aged poorly! I can watch it ironically!

Me, 2 hours later as the credits roll: *crying, cheering, buying the book, composing the songs*

Me, 2 weeks later: So I have compiled all of the quotes from the book that I think could make good tattoos, and also, HOW HAVE I NEVER LEARNED ABOUT HOW THE LAST UNICORN FUCKING SLAPS??? This gay-ass little fairytale fed my soul! Watered my crops! Transed my gender! Can't believe I heard of this story from youtube recommendations, of all places!!

[icewindandboringhorror]

Apparently I can meet my goal of roughly 400,000 words in 6 months if I just somehow write at least 2,200 words a day ghbjh... Almost 2,500 today... huzzah...