#because i put in the years of work
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greyaugust · 6 months ago
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my photos app showed me a picture of my apartment from eight years ago and it's absolutely wild that eight years ago i had no hot water and i was getting drunk on cheap wine almost every night and now here i am painting murals on every wall of my apartment that i own this is so wild
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tahopo · 4 months ago
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we truly regressed when people started buying into the genderbending is inherently transphobic thing. yeah that twelve year old being inquisitive and having fun on deviantart was your enemy all along.
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wilteddreamsofbaldursgate · 9 months ago
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Overindulgent father Astarion who tells his children they’re allergic to any kind of jewellery that isn’t made of the highest grade Dwarven crafted gold. 
It’s not even because Astarion might have a certain aversion to silver, no, he just raises his children to have standards, thank you very much. 
And it doesn’t end with shiny things, oh no… 
The Ancunín brood is known to be dressed in perfectly woven cotton, silk and soft leather clothes, no matter the occasion.
They’re seen playing with expensive toys, reading artfully illustrated books that certainly belong behind thick glass, not in children’s sticky hands. 
There’s even talk that one of the children is not as naturally inclined to music as his parents claim him to be, surely his lyre must be enchanted—the instrument certainly looks extravagant enough! 
And then there’s always this air of effortless haughtiness surrounding the Ancunín children whenever their nannies and servants are parading them through town as if they were perfect little dolls; objects to show off the wealth their parents acquired in quite the mysterious ways. 
So, it’s no secret that Astarion and Tav are pampering their children—some might say they’re even spoiling them rotten. 
And maybe they are, especially Astarion.
But he doesn’t see why he should raise them any other way, nor does he want to.  
When it comes to his children, Astarion has his own standards, and as long as Tav agrees with him nothing really matters. 
Because, these people, they don’t know anything about the Ancuníns. 
They don’t know that it’s not unusual for Astarion to wash out dirt and mud and strawberry stains from comically small finery, leaving behind only the memories of a day spent playing in the garden, chasing after ducks, picking flowers, lazing in the sun…
That any holes and tears the children’s clothes might suffer are quickly mended, making them look as good as new in no time. 
Nor do they know that Astarion doesn’t mind fashioning a brand new dress to match that of a favourite doll, either. Or to embroider a pretty vest with the likeness of that stray cat the children seem to adore, although their father would rather they don’t touch the mangy animal. 
No, those people know nothing at all...
“Not tired!” Astarion’s youngest cries; the vehement denial of her father’s earlier accusation is cut short by a telltale yawn.
The room still smells of fragrant lavender oil and peaches even when the bath water has already grown tepid, just one or two degrees above what Astarion would consider too cold to be enjoyable. 
Amused, he raises an eyebrow at the protesting toddler before he lifts her out of the copper bathtub with little effort. 
By now, he knows every step of this game.
“Tut-tut, my dear child, what did mama and I say?” Astarion kneels, quickly wrapping a soft towel around the child to keep her warm. “We only tell lies outside of this house.”
Unfazed by her father’s gentle scolding, the girl crosses her arms that haven’t yet lost their puppy fat across her chest, reminding Astarion a little too much of a very displeased Tav. 
Suppressing a sigh, he leans back to consider the pouting child, wondering what could possibly be upsetting her this time—the list is growing longer by the day, after all. 
“What’s the matter, dear?” Astarion asks gently, hoping it’s something easily fixable as it’s growing rather late. 
“Want apple!”
Decades ago, Astarion might’ve rolled his eyes—he knows exactly which stupid apple the child wants, it’s been haunting him all day—but once he started to treat his children’s problems as if they were his own, his life has grown somewhat easier. 
“Why, let’s get an apple on our way to bed, then. Would that be alright, Your Highness?” 
The girl promptly nods her head, allowing Astarion to pat her hair dry before dressing her in a clean night dress. 
She rests her cheek against her father’s shoulder as he carries her first to the kitchen to grab a fragrant apple and a knife, then to her bedroom where they settle on the cosy window seat, just like they do every night.
Soft moonlight is pouring through the windows; the child giggles at the way the knife’s blade is catching the silver light as Astarion peels and cuts the apple into even pieces.
“Here you go,” he finally says, giving the slice of apple one last examining look before surrendering it to the impatient little hands reaching for it. “A sweet treat for my little sweet. Doesn’t it taste so much better when we don’t eat it off the floor, darling?” And when it’s not crawling with ants…
The appeased toddler nibbles at the juicy fruit as Astarion carefully combs through her still-damp curls. 
Her hair’s getting long, he notices, knowing that taking care of it will become more time-consuming each day. 
Once, Astarion would’ve thought this task tedious, brushing out hair that’s not his own, oiling and braiding it for no other reason than knowing his children enjoy him doing it. 
But that’s why he loves doing it in the first place, he supposes.
Astarion can tell by his toddler’s heartbeat that sleep is about to claim her. 
The half-eaten slice of apple is still clutched in her little fist as he cradles the child to his chest, slowly rising from the window seat to put her to bed. 
He’s just about to lay the child down that the fruit drops to the floor, his daughter’s tiny hand clutching at his shirt instead.
“Thank you, papa,” she mumbles, more asleep than awake.
Astarion pauses.
He breathes in the clean, yet unique scent of the little girl that is forever engraved in his brain, the same way he knows under which exact constellation she was born. When she took her first steps, what her first word was. Soon, he will have to memorise her favourite colour, and what she likes to eat when dirty apples won’t be that appealing anymore. 
By now, Astarion knows this game by heart, knows that with every year that passes, he has something new to learn about his children.
And sometimes he wonders what it’s like to grow up with clean bed sheets and full bellies. Sleep filled with naught but warmth and happy memories. Ever open doors and tears that are dried by tender kisses. Living in a house where mistakes and anger are welcomed, safe. 
He wonders what it’s like for his children to know that their father’s love comes without conditions. Not now and not ever. 
Sitting down on the bed, Astarion holds his youngest a little closer to his chest, unwilling to let go of her, yet. 
He’s often accused of spoiling his children when most people can only just grasp the very surface of his love for them, the bare minimum of what he feels for his one and only, precious family. 
These baseless accusations are as unimportant to Astarion as the people voicing them.
He’s raising his children to have standards, wants them to take their father’s love for granted, to accept nothing less but pure devotion.
It’s the only way Astarion knows how to love them, the only way that comes most naturally to him. 
Astarion looks down at his little girl, now fast asleep, a gentle smile tugging at her lips. 
After all these years—all these children—he’s still in awe watching them sleep in his arms as if no harm in the world could ever befall them.
And it won’t—not if Astarion can help it. 
“No, thank you, my heart,” he whispers, pressing a kiss against the crown of the toddler’s head. 
When it comes to his children, Astarion holds himself to the highest standard.
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hellenhighwater · 3 months ago
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Hellen, how do you know how to do so many things? I know how to do a few things but I look at your stuff and every time I'm like "damn. I wish I could do that"
oh, I just do them.
It's after 1:30 am, so you get the existential answer. The fun thing about personhood is you get to just be whatever. You can't necessarily do whatever--money and laws are things, unfortunately, and you only get so much control over the opportunities available to you. But you can sort of just throw yourself down on the anvil of life and hammer yourself into whatever shape you want. Ideally the process of it drives out some flaws as you go, but sometimes also you take an impurity and make yourself stronger with it.
I am, still, a person who is terrified of failure; of incorrectness; of being wrong. And there is nothing to do with fear except shatter it with blunt force, and so I line myself up against failure again and again and again. I will try. I must; or the fear of failure wins, and I must keep trying after I fail or I have failed utterly. I fear failure, and therefore I take it as a challenge. I must do what I think I cannot. And you know what? More often than not, I can.
I have a weird and wandering skillset because I make myself try things, knowing full well that I will remember for decades every time someone saw me be less than instantly successful, because the only way I know to get better is to batter down the dross of my own fear. That's the deal. I'm not doing anything that nobody has done before. I know it's all possible. I just have to be the sort of person that does it. And it gets easier every time. If the question is can it be done and the answer is yes, then the next question is can I be the one to do it, and the answer is I want to be.
Every time I fail my way over and over to eventual success, trying again the next time is less scary; every time I have a broader base of skills to carry to the next challenge. I'm not unusually talented, just stubborn as hell, and I've lived long enough on I have to do what scares me that honestly, not that much scares me anymore.
If you keep failing long enough, it turns out that you just get really good at problem solving, and figuring out unconventional ways to reach your goals. It's not about a special secret concoction of skills, it's about persistence, and hammering away until you've taken a mess and made it into something you think is worth keeping. It's not easy, but it is simple.
Also I have incredibly strong unmedicated ADHD. But I sort of assume that's glaringly obvious.
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gros-chat-fait · 11 months ago
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Just six normal teens hanging out in the woods. --
100th post and final drawing of the year. Happy holidays and new year, everyone <3!
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bixels · 7 months ago
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The idea that uni protesters are "elitist ivy-league rich kids larping as revolutionaries" on Twitter and Reddit and even here is so fucking funny to me if you actually know anything about the student bodies at these unis. Take it from someone who's going to one of the biggest private unis in the US, 80% of the peers I know are either from the suburbs or an apartment somewhere in America, children of immigrants, or here on a student visa. I've heard about one-percenter students, but I've never met one in person. Like, don't get me wrong, the institution as a whole is still very privileged and white. I've talked with friends and classmates about feeling weird or dissonant being here and coming from such a different background. But in my art program, I see BIPOC, disabled, queer, lower-income students and faculty trying to deconstruct and tear that down and make space every day. So to take a cursory glance at a crowd of student protesters in coalitions that are led by BIPOC & 1st/2nd-gen immigrant students and HQ'd in ethnic housings and student organizations and say, "ah. children of the elite." Get real.
#also idk how to tell you this but even if it were true. wealthy children potentially sacrificing their educational careers to protest is#a good thing actually. idk how to tell you that caring about people from other nations is good#personal#“this war has nothing to do with most students cuz nobody's getting drafted” idk how to explain to you that we should be angry#that our tuitions of 10s of thousands of dollars that we pay every year for an education is being used to fund a genocidal campaign#also the implication that if you go to a uni institution you are automatically privileged by participation no matter your bg#i didn't /want/ to go to this school. i was supposed to go to a school with an art/animation program. but i realized my immigrant#parents have been working their whole lives to get me here. and turning the opportunity down would be a disservice to their sacrifice#this is getting into convos of “what 2nd gen kids owe their parents” which is different for everyone but. yeah#i just get pissed off at seeing people misrepresenting student bodies as “wealthy” and “privileged” and “elite” when it's such a blatant li#i remember a year ago a friend told me they can't fly home to hong kong for winter break because the plane tickets are too expensive#so they have to find temporary housing around the area#last quarter for a film doc class my film partner made a doc on a small group of marxist grad students from india discussing praxis#during a rally a few months ago in response to police presence the coalition invited palestinian students to speak about their experiences#and lead songs and read poems they wrote. these are STUDENTS. are they elitist too?#this is not to disregard my own personal privilege either.#this whole narrative's just to rationalize a lack of empathy to me. seeing a 19yo student get shot by a rubber bullet and your first#reaction is “HAW! HAW! bet richy rich didn't see THAT coming when she put on her terrorist hood!”#newsflash. these big uni campuses are HAUNTED by the violence of past protests and revolutions and police brutality. we know.#why do you think these coalitions have been making reinforced barricades at record speed
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non-un-topo · 5 months ago
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To the next adventure...
Image description and details under cut
I.D.
[A drawing of Nicky, Joe, Quynh, and Andy from The Old Guard. They are all in profile, walking in a straight line facing the sun. They are dressed in medieval clothing and armour, and each carry their own weapons and bags. Nicky has his sword, a crossbow, a quiver of bolts, a dagger at his belt and another strapped to his ankle. Joe is holding his sword, a bag, and a coin purse. Quynh's bow is over her back, and her quiver is at her hip. Two daggers are strapped to her belt, one of them matching Nicky's. Andy is holding her axe, two bags, and a dagger. They each have serene expressions and closed eyes, as if they're not in a hurry. In the background, the seasons change from winter to spring, summer, fall. There is an old tree behind them, and its branches change with the seasons.]
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heartorbit · 7 months ago
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the star you've longed for
#PLEASE WATCH REVUE STARLIGHT!!!!!!💥💥💥💥💥#project sekai#revue starlight#pjsk#emu otori#nene kusanagi#emunene#prsk#proseka#yuri win. i make my fav pairing fight tothe death#HAPPY EMUNENE WEEK LOOOOOL#Can i be hinestni think this sucks it took way too long cause i forgot how to draw for a week#im seeing demons and stuff. i feel more normal now. Also you may recall emu has a big hammer for revstar#thats the bottom of it the gem thing all the weapons have hers is sharp#i remember seeing meta post abt how mahiru has a blunt weapon because she never actually aimed for the lead role#rather she only wanted to be by karen's side. so her weapon wasnt capable of cutting anything in the first place#Fastforward to the movie and well LOLLLLL#though i think its funny in the movie her mace is still mostly used for i timidation againstbhikari.. bc again shes not winning for a lead#revue starlight youre neat. maybe i like revstar.#<- has been insane for 4+ years#Needed their pose to be smth where nenes weapon isnt visible because I DONT KNOW WHAT WEAPON TO GIVE HER. OOMFS HELP. I NEED A NENE WEAPON.#i thought some sort of polearm/spear/halberd etc something with range but that can be ambitious#but i feel like smth with that much footwork needed doesnt suit her.. And she cant hsve a sniper i dont think thatwould fucking work#aruru gets pistols in the revue but aruru also is Ummm well shes uhhh. [screaming] [car crash]#throwing knives would be funny wouldnt it. Put that gamer aim to use#idk if the emunene week tag is on here but i'll donit anyways#emuneneweek2024#EDIT: i have decided nene gets a rapier. its awesome. thanks for coming#tsukasa has his giant flag and i dont want to budge on that. im thinking about giving rui the throwing knives since he juggles.#it would be funny. saki + rui knife juggling
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3584-tropical-fish · 13 days ago
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Not that anyone asked but looking at a.) the fact that Carpenter says that it’s clay being torn from the riverbank by the floodwaters of the White Gull and b.) The Hjulström Curve:
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We can determine that the flow velocity of the White Gull River in TSV45 was approximately 150-300 cm/s.
What does this mean? Absolutely nothing, I’m going to be so honest. I just find this amusing
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peachcott · 2 years ago
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[ aa ] reflecting / witnessed
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unriding · 6 days ago
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me n moze say good morning to the world !!! ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
art by @rabbbitseason of course <3
#🐦‍⬛🐕 .#<-#hehe i took inspo from kai’s rb of my mb:>#MY FIRST MOEVIE COMM#this is queued#im asleep (at least i should be by the time this is posted) but it’s a mystery as to how i will fall asleep knowing i would have to#close my eyes and not actively stare at this for the rest of my life#full factory reset i really don’t know what i would even say to this 🥹 im just#things i would do for bitti : anything! i cannot think of something i wouldn’t do for her#i gave her the most cursed ref known to mankind and she came up with this im so 🥹 thank you so much … your art blows me away every time ….#i may pass out seeing him in your style … the way you did his hands and he’s so big#this is me -> ໒꒰���ི o̴̶̷̤ ̯o̴̶̷̤ ꒱ྀི১ at this HSJDNCN aaaaaa 🥹#i will also state the very obvious and say that bitti is such a pleasure to work with ajsnxnkck ….. please im on my knees#when i saw this- my stomach literally flipped inside out and my ears were ringing .. and my heart was beating a million beats per second#if bitti’s comms were open for eternity & i won the lottery- i would commission so many mozes ….. the world would be full of bitti’s mozes.#^ though that sounds terrible for bitti … im so sorry#i swear that won’t happen i would never do that to you#he is sooooo yum in your style (severe & outrageous understatement)#but what i can do is stare at this all day#THANK YOU BITTI UEUEJJSJS 🥹🥹🥹 I HOPE UR PILLOWS R ALWAYS COLD !!!#not even aventurine’s shield can protect me from the 100000000 damage i took from this /pos#such a shield doesn’t exist in the hsr realm or the real world !!!#evie.ss#IM KIND OF ANGRY THAT I KNOW THERES NOTHING I CAN SAY TO EXPRESS HOW I FEEL !!!!! WHAT COULD I SAY >:#WHAT AN ODD FEELING WHERE I AM reduced to my knees but from positive emotions alone …#im so dizzy /pos let me stop here this is already so long omg 🥹#edit: dude /gn my screen time is gonna skyrocket because im still staring with such a dopey smile on my face ahsndnxkc gosh im happy :’) th#thank you so much bitti …. this means so much to me#i literally can not put into words how much this has made my entire year :’)) im so soft im so happy
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sergle · 8 months ago
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When I talk about something bad I've experienced, Baked In to my experience as A Woman, I am not "making my little cousins feel like shit for being women", because I am talking in a space with, allegedly, adults. I am not bringing my problems to children in the first place. That said, I don't HAVE to make my baby cousin feel bad, because she's already experienced sexual harassment in her life, and she's only 8, and doesn't even understand what any of it means yet. And everyone in her family can try to instill confidence in her, and never talk about our bodies in a negative way. But she can still feel like she's too chubby, because she still goes to school, and talks to other kids and their parents, and still sees ads, and still watches tv. We can be positive, but we can't fix the root of the problem. And I don't HAVE to tell trans women that "pain is a rite of passage", because that's not a Rule being enforced (by me), because I've already sat and listened to my friend complain about constantly shaving as a Baseline necessity and how it hurts her skin and she has to put makeup onto fresh cuts on her face because going out without a full face of properly feminine makeup would make her life worse, and being anything less than thin and lithe makes her "less feminine", and ALL the things that can make her "more feminine" are behind a paywall. And I can try to make her feel better, and I can hear her experiencing the tenfold version of problems I relate to, but I can't fix the root cause of her problems by just telling her not to complain. Forcing happiness as a core personality trait for women is not the Girlboss Feminist move that you think it is, and no amount of gender euphoria in the world will make you immune to systemic oppression.
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mossy-paws · 24 days ago
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Get in the fucking biograft, Shuriken. (EVANGELION/PHIGHTING!)
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(og screenshot’s/cover under text!) Why hello there to my tumblr followers, it’s been a awhile /silly
ANYWAYS!!! Guess who recently finished the EVA franchise minus the rebuilds and has been in a horrible chokehold over it, this anime ruined my life but hey at least its intro theme is nice……
Well, I wanted to draw some stuff for it! All together these pieces took exactly 48 hours and 20 minutes… with the cover-piece taking ~35(?) of those hours. These were… very, VERY time costly safe to say LOL,,, I am super, SUPER proud of how the cover came out though, everything on it was drawn, colored, rendered, edited, whatever, BY HAND stroke by stroke (as you can see below)
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The text, the lineart, the shadows, the colors, the snowflakes on the bio and Shuri, EVERYTHING was done by hand, it was horribly time costly but it did come out very, VERY well in the end I would say (fun fact! I also didn’t originally have the textless version of the cover, and I had to trace all of the lineart for bio’s tophalf by just guessing what line when where and what the hell was going on /silly)
this was a very, very hard project to do all together, but it was also a really nice learning experience too, I’m happy i did it that’s for sure :3!
(og screenies + cover)
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woosh-floosh · 1 year ago
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HOLY SHIT FIRST BONSLY CARD IN 16 YEARS!!
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AND IT'S NOT SHOWING HOLE THIS TIME!!
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shadyhouse · 1 month ago
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if anyone is able to help me out i'd appreciate it, im still broke as hell. this month has been really difficult for me. i worked a total of 5 days all month and my bank account is in the negatives again after paying bills and getting some living essentials. i dont know how im going to pay my rent like this. i applied to a financial relief fund from a local trans advocacy group but it's going to be a few weeks until anything comes from that. if you have literally anything to spare it would help me out a lot 😭🙏 i feel bad ive been asking for help so often and i know everyone is struggling, im working on getting my life back in order but everything fucking sucks and is difficult right now :( even just spreading this is a huge help
pp: paypal.me/bewearrr vnm: tobias_leviathan
thank you 💕💕
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spacedlexi · 11 months ago
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"sounds nice... having a partner"
#the walking dead game#twdg#violentine#clementine twdg#violet twdg#MAANN when clem says this in s3 JUST WAIT BBY#people who say clemvi has no basis like ep2 isnt just them working as a team for 2 and a half hours regardless of player choice#like be fr#clem telling louis that violet patching up the back wall is ok because she needed something to keep herself busy. married behavior#vi asking clem to help check in on everyone while she deals with the wall. their shared smile when she comes back outside :)#and then they sit in the leadership spot together overlooking the yard and everything theyve planned together coming to fruition :)#sorry i just think their romance set up in eps 1 and 2 is obvious as FUCK and im tired of (Some) people pretending it isnt#'i havent seen her warm up to someone in a long time' brody literally tells clem that vi seems to like her after its been 24 hours#after shes been a block of ice for a whole year. and clem just melted those walls down immediately while they fought walkers together#violet is so devoted to clem post ep1 its embarrassing for her#'i saw she had you pinned and i- shit i got So crazy...' sorry if you dont think shes in love with clem idk what to tell you#'i'll tear that boat apart before we leave without you' i know you would girlie!!!#the animators went CRAAZAYAYAYAY the way they look at each other... their little smiles at each other....even before the belltower#the way clem looks at her while they dance.... the way she puts her head down on her shoulder so contentedly....#and then she keeps her head on violets shoulder as she pulls away so clems chin gets dragged with it like she doesnt want to let go#'so you never forget that night' 'i never will' they are DISGUSTINGLY in love with each other it makes me physically ill#its 2024 and im still hearing 'i just didnt see it :/'. lazerbeams you#spaced art 2024
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