#beacuse god already know just how many other things I have to do

[chaoticfandomgirly]

I think you're exaggerating it just a little. I mean, I'm really happy to do it on my own. In fact I wrote the whole research paper after reading countless other researches. I don't condone to be reliable upon it at all. But, there was a small part that I couldn't find any research on. And I think that the fake references are mostly belonging to chatgpt because since then there are proper programs that provides the link to the research papers that it's citing. So, more often than not, I double check the source. And, as for writing, I like to write on my own too.

(via the author, at the Ex Bird place)

[lenaromanov]

Hi again gods and goddesses 🤭

So,I just wanted to talk about the little changes that keep happening in my reality.

The most amazing thing about learning(or remembering, beacuse we forget or are programmed to believe other things) that we are gods,little gods,ok,but we were created in the image of the mf creator of the entire universe,this one and any other that I believe exists! This is big.

Is so gross that from the moment we are born people try to convince us otherwise. They say we are lesser,sinners,helpless. That because of our skin color,place of birth,social standing,etc,etc,we can't have it,we can't do it,we have to suck it up and accept things as they are just like anybody else.

And the biggest blasfemy,they say we are separated from the creator,god,the universe,whatever you call It.

FUCK THAT.

Really. I was created by the universe itself. I'm an immortal councioness. I literally created a matrix for myself to experience life in the 3d!

I'm powerful. We all are.

And I'm actually so happy to learn manifestation because I changed from the inside to the outside. I used to have panic attacks for example and now they are gone. I'm tried to kill myself once and I used to feel so fucking depressed,so down,like I was a piece of dog shit on the floor 😅. I honestly think that until finding my way to manifestation I've never experienced real peace and content. I know it sound crazy,but I had a pretty hard childhood and teen years,but I'm revising it because why not? I DESERVE to have a good childhood,good parents,good things happening to me in that timeline.

So I'm really grateful for all the teachers I found on the internet,for neville and florence and abraham,and many others.

I also wanted to say to that before your big manifestation comes little funny things start to happen,and I don't believe in coincidences.

It can be as little as thinking about a music and the radio plays it right away or your playlist rolls it. Thinking about numbers and seeing then everywhere.

I guess in July I was going back home from grocery shopping and I was thinking that I really wanted to see a friend of mine,her son died and I wanted to see her and see how she was doing,so I decide to pass in from of her house on my way home. She's almost never home because she runs a business,but guess who was just getting home when I got to the street where she lives?

Things like that. Neville says that there are no signs BEFORE manifesting,the signs FOLLOWS, so if you're seeing the signs your manifestation already is here.The fact that it's not in the 3d means nothing. It will show up.

And that's it I guess.

Just some thoughts.

I know this week will be amazing for all of us

🥰

[epistaxia]

♡ Eddie Munson random headcanons ♡

Random headcanons - in some of them the reader is mentioned and it can be read as gender neutral, romantic or platonic. (No use of Y/N)

Contents and warnings: nothing really :) maybe a little bity if fluff. (664 words)

A/N: i’ve been collecting these in my journal in the past few days, beacuse yes, sometimes i write by hand about a man in my journal like an infatuated 19th century woman! Some are quite long, more like short drabbles. (English is not my first language so be kind :))

Eddie loves when his friends and partner give him drawings or little notes. He acts cool when he gets them, because they're often for the d&d campaign or they’re simple christmas cards, but then reads them when he’s alone in his room, smiling to himself. He keeps them in a shoebox and hangs up on his walls the drawings he likes most. (OMG if he ever met Will! !! Aaaahhh)

THRIFT KING. He spends the money he makes by dealing on music gear, so he has a limited budget for stuff like clothes. He's been doing it for a while now so he has a precise itinerary of thrift stores around Hawkins, fidelity cards, and all. He even once did that thing of hiding a jacket he wanted between other clothes and came back the next day with enough money to buy it. When he comes back, he puts on a little fashion show for you and explains in detail how he’s going to modify the clothes to match his style. (We’ve all seen those pictures of Joseph Quinn trying the different versions of the costume. That's the vibe. Chaos basically. )

Every Christmas and birthday he gets his uncle a new hat and has been since he was in elementary school. It turned into a tradition and now uncle Wayne proudly displays his collection in the trailer living room (you can actually see them in the show in the background and in that backstage tour of the van)

When he’s having a tough day, he goes to skull rock with his walkman and/or a book. He likes the walk from and to his house the most, it’s an opportunity to clear his mind and spend some time alone. He's been doing it for a few years and more than once he had to go back home because the spot was already taken by a couple. He didn’t know him personally yet, but at least twice the rock was occupied by Steve and the girl he was going out with at that time.

He read in a magazine that some metal band members use women’s perfume as an act of rebellion and provocation. So, he bought one and wears it, hoping that if anyone smells it they think it rubbed off a girl he was with, instead of making fun of him.

Asks you to help him collect bottle caps, can tabs and safety pins to make diy pins. He always makes an extra few to give you as a thank you.

Kind of an arsonist, out of curiosity though. He just has to set fire to different small objects and materials. He knows they will just burn but what if this time something else happens, doesn’t even think about how the something else might be something dangerous, like a small explosion or toxic fumes.

He has an ever-changing, but very detailed list of tattoos and piercings to get in the future. Yes, it includes at least one nipple piercing and a tramp stamp. He says it's not a tramp stamp, but the position and design say otherwise.

His weirdly specific childhood interest was Norse mythology. He still remembers some very specific events and details and adapts them to put in the D&D campaigns. Just imagine the joy of little Eddie learning there was a god of mischief!? It took him a while to spell mischief correctly but he got there.

When you spend the night at his and have breakfast together, he insists on doing stupid stuff, and you have to go along even if you’re still waking up. You have to throw him cheerios, because it’s fundamental to know how many he can catch with his mouth at 9 in the morning on a Friday. And you have to pour him maple syrup on the pancakes, and also directly in his mouth still full of cereals, because he doesn’t want to get his fingers sticky.

Eddie hates the feeling of stepping on anything like sand, grass or rocks barefoot, so when you go to Lovers' lake, he jumps on strangers' towels on his way to and from the water.

[kiwikipedia]

So its moon knight time again and I think I should start with a disclaimer that I’ve never read the comics so I really only am using the show and mythology as my refrence

Anyways.

As per my last post, I mentioned that I was odd that instead of Anubis, it was Taweret who was there to greet Marc and Steven in limbo/the after life. I had maybe hoped for a bit more or maybe Marc to realize something was weird— or maybe even just a complete erasure of Anubis. But that wasn’t the case.

We see the Scales are designed to be like Anubis, meaning that Anubis was the Arbiter originally. But now it’s fallen to Taweret to do so.

I won’t go over everything again, but we do get confirmation that Taweret is ‘new’ at the whole judgment thing— she really isn’t sure what she’s doing, to the point where she has notecards on everything. Meaning she likely hasn’t been the Arbiter for some time. To really look into why I think more on why Taweret and not Anubis again, we sorta have to go backwards to another theory I have.

We’ve already gone over the gods associted with death, and again I do find it odd that Osiris was still so flippant about everything. 

Which brings up a theory that perhaps the Osiris we see isn’t actually the ‘real’ Osiris— either by Corruption, or something else.

Big Name Gods (gods like Ra, Osiris, Ptah, Toth, the ones who deal with creation of life and balance) wouldnt be so careless about all of this. 

And Osiris, being a god of death, would have no reason to not go extra lengths to keep the world in balance if someone was trying to bring back something that was already deemed corrupted— as Ammit was deemed that. There is a lot of emphisis on balance and peace, from what I can tell, but you know who doesn’t really care about that shit?

Set.

Now, in myths Set is the brother of Osiris, and Set kills Osiris— there’s a number of possible reasons why, one of which was because he was furious because his wife, Nephthys, had conceived a child, named Anubis, by Osiris, others are because of jelousy, etc. 

Some other shit happens, Set and Osiris’ son— Horus— fight for the throne of the gods, and somewhere along the line, Osiris comes back to life through the help of a bunch of other gods including Anubis, but what if it wasnt just that?

Set, in myths, would go to great lengths to protect Ra. In fact, before the Osiris Myth, Set had a positive role where he accompanied Ra on his barque to repel Apep, the serpent of Chaos.

I might have said this before, but, I do also think something happened to Ra— we don’t see Ra when the gods met, which makes little sense to me considering how the actual, principal ennead was the Great Ennead of Heliopolis. This was headed by the sun god and creator Re/Ra or Re-Atum, followed by Shu and Tefnut, Geb and Nut, and Osiris, Isis, Seth or Set, and Nephthys. Notice how Osiris and Tefnut are the only gods who are actually part of the Ennead of Heliopolis who appear in the summoning of the gods. 

Now, I do feel as if the faith of people has some sort of impact on the gods— as the people pulled away from Ra and towards Osiris, Osiris could have usurped Ra’s power. Depending on how many gods followed Osiris, he could have had him sealed away, or possibly killed him. Osiris’ wife already tried to kill him once so that Horus could bolster his royal authority, who is to say that Osiris wouldn’t try the same thing?

Whatever the case is, what happened to Ra caused Set's spiral into a being of Chaos— Set was not always seen as an Evil God, just like how Ammit was not always seen as an Evil Being either.

So, what if instead of Osiris being resurrected, but it was Set assuming Osiris' form? I did go back and look at the wall of imprisoned gods again, beacuse of course I did, and compared some of them to other statues. One of them looks a lot like Osiris. Osiris got sealed away post death so he could not be resurrected or at least not fully and when Anubis ‘killed’ Set, Set fully assumed the shell of Osiris’ corpse.  

Of course, After doing so— Set as Osiris could then systematically started to remove all the competent death gods for the sake of chaos— perhaps as revenge for Ra. Death and life are a balance, after all, and if he starts to remove one, he throws the other off.

Anubis, perhaps, was first. Both because of him being a cornerstone of the Afterlife and, almost because of revenge. Again, Anubis might not be Set’s son. Set seals Anubis away because of a duel reason, and because Anubis is gone now Ma'at and Toth have to focus on the under world instead of their usual duties. 

Take Thoth away and Ma'at has to run the whole show and shes under suspicion because Thoth is her husband— and vice versa.

That allows for Set to start whispering things to Ammit, for her to start being manipulated, to start sowing chaos. And perhaps it wasn’t exactly in his plans to get Ammit sealed away as well, but whichever one of the judgement gods remains can’t just rule the underworld alone— they have other domains, after all.

And, if Set can put a god who has zero experience into the underworld, cases that require a delicate hand would be brushed off. The whole no exceptions rule like this case, for example. 

Anubis, I believe, would likely see that something is wrong— and honestly, there's probably a procedure for DID souls that is a different from what Taweret is doing. Not only that but the whole incomplete thing I feel is like a "One can survive or all can survive" and Anubis would notices that there's one heart missing without fail. 

Taweret’s inexperience with actual judgement when it comes to souls that arent as straight forwards like Marc and Steven’s case, would allow for improper blanace even in the underworld. And, it would allow for obsticles that would make things difficult to be claimed before anything could get settled as Taweret would have no idea how to hold off the process like I’m assuming Anubis might be able to. 

TL;DR:

We know now that Taweret is inexperienced and likely hasn’t been the Arbiter of the Dead for very long in comparison to the other gods of judgement. 

The lack of proper judgement and her being in place could be a choice made by Set, who could possibly be in control of or acting as Osiris due to myths and how strange it is that Osiris, a literal god of death, is not really doing much in regards to things that would be happening in his domain.

Granted, this is all just insane ramblings and theories, me stringing up pins and yarn because I just think that it is intersting. Hopefully the final episode clears shit up too

[sevlyn]

[ID: Many Reddit posts documenting user CountryMamaLynn’s experience of helping her gay son and kicking out her homophobic husband. ]

[Image 1:

My son came out NEED ADVICE

If this post seems a little messy it’s because I'm typing this out quick.

Yall This is a new account I made just now beacuse i need to vent and I'm not sure where else to post this and my family follow my real account.

My son 15 just came out yesterday as gay to my husband and my husband kicked him out well I was at work! I got a panicked phone call from my baby telling me everything and let me tell yall I was pissed I left work early and drove over to my house where I saw my baby boy sitting on the curb with his clothes and shit all across the damn lawn and a screaming as if now soon to be ex husband who is not the man I thought I married!!! I gave that bastard a piece of my mind and told him that if he cant be a man and support his son then he can kiss my ass and find someone else to pay his bills. I shoved my boys stuff in the back of my truck and went to hotel that I'm in right now cause my parents cant pick us up till Monday so we can stay with them. I dont know much about this whole gay thing so what can I do to make my kid fell excepted????

EDIT I took y'alls advice I pay for the house so that mother fucker will be out in a few days and my son will be back in his home. I bought my son a bunch of pride stuff! Apparently hes had a boyfriend for around 7 months now and I'm getting to meet him over facetime tomorrow and I'm so excited!!!! I'm doing everything I can to make him feel loved. Out of everything that's happened the most heart breaking thing was my son saying "I'm sorry I'm crying mom I just need to be strong" I told him that he doesn't need to be strong he needs to be loved and that I'll do anything I can to make him feel that way. God this is the hardest thing in my life and I'm trying so hard yall all I can do is make sure he knows this isnt his fault. Thanks for the support I'll keep ya updated if I can.]

[Image 2:

Meeting my baby boys bf tomorrow !!!!!

I'm sooo excited y'all, were meeting over facetime and I'm so happy I'm knitting my son a rainbow blanket and aaaaaa its turning out perfect!!!]

[Image 3:

C: get fucked mark

(Below the heading, an image with the lady screaming at cat meme. Text overlaying the lady says, “My ex husband trying to kick my son out for being gay”. Text overlaying the cat says, “My son and I kicking him out cause I own the house”. The cat is wearing a rainbow cap and rainbow shirt.)]

[Image 4:

Update yall Mark's reaction (read the previous posts if you're confused)

(Incase you dont know this is the after math of me kicking out my now ex husband after he tried to kick out my baby boy for being gay while I was at work.)

I called him and very "Kindly reminded" him who owns the house and pays the bills and he was screaming about how "You need me woman, you cant just kick me out whore" and asked to meet in person. So I did but I dont trust him so I brought my adorable camo baseball bat just in case things went south so we met up in front of the house and he was hooting and hollering about how "I was already screwing a different woman so I dont need you!" And obviously this upset me but then I remembered that I dont have to put up with this crap so I told him it's time to haul ass before i make him and he started crying like a baby begging me to let him stay and saying " you'll never find another man like me" and I told him that is the whole point of me leaving him. So he finally left after hours crying like a bitch and now my son and I have lots of extra space!]

[Image 5:

HAY Y'ALL Mama Lynn update

I was talking to my son who if you haven't seen my other posts came out recently, and found out I might not be just a straight ally!

I assumed all straight ladys were also just as attracted to other ladys as they were men and I never really thought about it till now but turns out I might be bi??? Is that the right word?? Thanks for all the love n support!!]

[Image in rikusqueenofhearts’ post: Reaction image of middle-aged lady holding a cupcake saying, “Good for her.”]

[normal-thoughts-official]

Ur take on a malec beauty and the beast au please

ugh you got me in a difficult position here because on the one hand, i do love the idea of a beauty and the beast malec au. i just think the idea of a socially isolated person who thinks themself/is perceived as monstruous and who has locked away their heart and doesn't believe they could ever be loved fits magnus like a glove. but on the other hand, i don't want to make magnus, a brown character, animalistic, for obvious reasons. and i can't really think of a way to make him monstruous that doesn't fall into animalization/beastification (both racist tropes) or ableist tropes

so i'm thinking... maybe the spell is just that people are repulsed by him/fear him automatically? like it just creates this horrible almost impossible to ignore repulsive/fear/"fight or flight activating" aura around him for absolutely no reason and makes ppl be repulsed and/or hate him. even if it doesn't change his appearance at all. it's not really a changing or shifting spell, more like a spell of hatred

which like.... i know doesn't sound like anything poc/queer people don't already go through but there is a main difference which is that it makes it impossible to find a community. like even other brown and queer people look at him and feel this... huge disgust and even fear and might even hide and so the isolation is absolutely total and it fucking hurts. and besides it is one thing (a very bad thing) to walk around and have to be on constant alert because you never know if someone is going to be violent, and have to deal with occasional comments and disgusted reactions... it's another to consistently have like, children screaming and people cowering 100% of the time without exception, you know? he's basically living the life ppl with social anxiety think they live and he has nowhere to turn to, no one who understands or who's more likely to actually want to talk to him because of his differences. there's no one to lean on. even the people who love him aren't immune to it, even if of course they are not turning their backs on him

so anyway here are my thoughts: this was totally done by camille lol beacuse the whole backstory about being mean to an elderly lady doesn't fit magnus anyway and also i just like sprinkling camille angst where i can. so after magnus finally got himself free of her and her stupid claws she hexxed him back into isolation. both as punishment (a kinda "if you don't want me, then you have no one" logic) and just to make him more vulnerable because again, abusers want you alone and isolated and away from a support network so you are more dependant on them and more likely to buy into their thwarped logic if they can immerse you in it. so she's just trying to manipulate him into getting back with her, because she wants him and most of all his power

and basically you know the drill, if he doesn't find anyone who will love him romantically until the rose withers yada yada he will die. and again she just wants to make the spell so it constantly drives home how alone he is and how he can't find anyone who will love him (except for her), and make it so he's more and more likely to come back to her as time goes by because then the spell will be broken

(sidenote: camille obviously doesn't actually love him, because anyone who does that to someone doesn't love them. but as the one who cast the spell, she can lift it whenever she wants. so all she has to do is kiss him and lift the spell and be like "see, magnus? who else would love you like this, but me? even after all these years?". and honestly if it had come to that magnus would know she was lying because there is no way this is love, none. but anyway it doesn't come to that, that's just what her plan is)

anyway it still doesn't work because magnus is done and he won't get back to her, and he particularly doesn't want to get back with her after, you know, all this trashfire. and he just sets his jaw and is like "fine" and accepts that he will live however long he still has with his friends and people he loves and away from her, basically

and like gosh sidenote but this would have been so painful for his friends. camille very deliberately made it romantic love because she knows magnus has so many fucking people who love him, but him and the immortal squad have found family dynamics, not romantic ones. so there is nothing they can do even though their love for magnus is just... so real and pure and they hate to see him like this, hate to know that right when he finally got rid of her she made sure he still couldn't go out in the world. especially since magnus has always been so damn sociable, loved to be surrounded by people and to meet them and care for them. but here he is, walking as hidden as he can and with his head down avoiding eye contact because he knows the horror is there and some children run away screaming when they see him

and i just picture this desperate little scene with raphael in particular where he's just like.... "i'll try to kiss you. we have to try" and magnus is all, "my boy, you don't even like kissing, and she was very adamant that it had to be romantic" and raphael is almost in tears like "but i do love you, goddamn it! i should be able to undo this spell" and it's so sweet that he's trying and willing to be in this really awkward position where he kisses (yikes) magnus (which is just weird especially since magnus is kind of a father figure to him) because he's just... so desperate to have him free of her, finally, once and for all, you know?

but obviously it doesn't work, not even with dot, who had a kinda fling with him in the past but doesn't really feel Romantic Love™ for him even though she does love him, it's just... not what the spell requires. and it's unfair as hell and there are lots of tears but just the fact that magnus falls asleep surrounded in a teary cuddle pile after some of the absolute worst kisses of his life because his friends/family love him enough to put themselves in such an uncomfortable position in the hopes of making him free, is enough to make him feel a little better. and the fact that they are still there for him and obviously still love him so fiercely even though looking at him now literally evokes fight or flight instincts in them is already more than anything camille could ever give him. if anything, she's proven how loved magnus is

and that helps him get through it that day and is something he tries to hold unto in the worst days, but still, it's hard and it just... sucks. it's tiring to go out in the street and always have people staring at you and to see the horror in their faces and be so isolated and never really know what might happen, if he will be attacked or harrassed or what exactly will happen. so he isolates himself more and more and soon the only people who ever see him or visit him are his friends. and fuck, do they hate seeing him like this

things settle in a weird kind of way. magnus is still living his life and working as a wizard and etc and in a way the spell even helps him have some more credibility because you know, isolated scary person is kinda what ppl expect from wizards. but he avoids having contact at all costs and mostly sends the potions they request and stuff their way, and the only ppl he sees are his friends unless he absolutely can't avoid going outside. and he's fucking miserable. and every once in a while camille will come back to be like "so, magnus, are you ready to stop with this little tantrum of yours and come back to me now? how is the rose doing, by the way?" because god forbid he catches a break

also it turns out that magnus' adoptive streak becomes even stronger because he is 1- extra lonely; and 2- empathizing more than ever with the outcasts. don't get me wrong, he always has, he's a fucking brown, bi trans man for fuck's sake. we all see ourselves in the stray dogs and lonely people one way or another. but now this is turned up to a thousand, so, you know

so he has one (1) extra kind of contact in his life which is basically with stray animals (particularly cats cuz u know, this is magnus) that he finds around in need of help. they can all leave if they want, but a lot of them stay, particularly the black cats, disabled animals, and others that have a particularly hostile environment outside. you know

(not me again with my very specific hcs about deaf pitbulls who fall in love with my faves but LOOK pitbulls are very sweet and caring animals who don't deserve the fame of monsters that they have and if the idea of one being best friend's with magnus and them having a loving and caring relationship doesn't appeal to you then idk what the fuck to tell you)

this of course doesn't help his image cuz this guy is just going there and collecting black cats and snakes and has a huge pitbull around with him at all times but it's not like it can get any worse so magnus doesn't care, and besides, he can't just leave them out to die in the cold and harrassment of middle ages white ppl who think black cats are the worst possible thing but rats carrying deadly diseases are fine (and look, i know rats are also animals that get a lot of shit and persecution, but like, seriously, clean the streets)

and every once in a while there will be a person in need too, like a homeless person in need of a place to stay or some sick person who has been abandoned or something of the sort, so magnus brings them in as well and cares for them as well as he can, but also tries to maintain minimal contact because he's been burned too many times, okay

so like, cue alec! i know in the original BATB belle ended up with the beast to save her father's life but fuck that. i lowkey consider making it "izzy ran away from home so alec comes after her and they both end up staying with magnus" but i think i like it better if it's just alec who decided to leave. like he's done with the abuse both towards him and his sister and he wants to be able to live his life even if he's gonna have to start over in some other village all alone. anywhere but here and all that

and of course alec used to be plenty rich and he has a lot of skills that help him pass by - he's a good archer and hunter, he's a good leader and organizer so he could do wonders for a failing business, he's smart and cunning - but he also has, like, 2 gold coins to his name. maybe some more from stuff he took from home and sold, but still

initially he is living at a tavern and i guess i'm making simon, raphael, and maia tavern owners again! i don't even care anymore, it suits them. rapha is the cook and the three of them run the business and simon also makes musical appearances during dinners every once in a while, and they are living the happy queer polyamorous life of their dreams. we have no choice but to stan

anyway alec is staying with them and he becomes friends with i think maia in particular since, you know, she is the one with the most contact with the customers since rapha is in the kitchen and simon is up the stage most of the time. plus they are both the same brand of bastard and they have an easy understanding between them that just works

and look! simon, raphael, and maia are 3 trans, non-christian/non-white (unnecessary addendum: the concept of whiteness didn't exist until around the 17th century, but whiteness as a concept came basically as a substitute for christianity [link to source], so i'm counting the fact that simon is jewish and raphael and maia are not culturally european as equivalent to non-whiteness in this context) people, so it's not like they would ever kick a gay man running from an abusive home out. but you know what they also are? magnus' friends. and after a while of talking to him maia thinks he is trustworthy enough for them to send magnus' way, because magnus needs as many friends as possible. plus, he wouldn't kick a person in need out, so unlike with them magnus can't really push this newcomer away so he'd have more company. plus, the possibility that he might fall in love with magnus and undo the stupid spell is there, i'm just saying! i'm not saying it WILL happen but why not give it a fucking shot?

raphael in particular is of course super protective of magnus and he swears to god that if this guy gives him half a bad look raphael will end him, which earns him some pats on the shoulder for his troubles and "rapha, we don't want magnus to be hurt either"s. maia says that she's been assessing him for quite a while now and she's pretty positive that he won't be terrible to magnus, but if she's wrong, she'll kill him personally too. and rapha trusts maia. how could he not? she's maia

so, they send alec magnus' way. "i'm sorry alec, but we are struggling to make ends meet *hides gigantic gold stash* and the tavern is packed *raphael upstairs stomps at maximum speed to make it seem like their 13 empty rooms upstairs actually have people* and we really need your room to give to this customer *simon in a wig* BUT we have a friend who we're sure will give you shelter if you ask, it's not very far away, and once we have a free room we will let you know". and alec is just like, okay, because he's been staying there for free or considerably less than the usual fee/in exchange for some stuff he hunts for quite a while now, and they are nice, so it's not like he can complain

and they don't tell him about the spell exactly because it is not their story to tell but they do let him know what to expect re: magnus' vibes and say it's a spell. and alec's like ok i guess. alec's very practical, he doesn't really care, and it's not like it's the guy's fault anyway. which is exactly why maia is sending alec there

so they send magnus a heads up ("magnus this guy is HOMELESS and we are SOOOOO packed can you please give him shelter for a little while thx xoxo"). alec arrives there a while later carrying like 3 prime rabbits he has hunted as a thank you gift because he hates being dependant on people but it's not like jobs abound in the middle ages, and he is actually a little embarrassed to go in and ask this guy he doesn't know for shelter but he IS kinda desperate. for now

anyway he is standing there with his 3 rabbits debating whether or not to knock on the door and magnus just opens it magically like "i know you're there, dear, just come in" so alec does and awkwardly presents him the rabbits and shit and is all "thanks for letting me stay, uh. i can help you with food and taking care of the house and stuff" even though, you know, magnus has magic and doesn't need it

(and magnus appreciates it deeply, because it is tiring to do it all magically on his own but most non-magical people don't even consider that)

and like... it is very awkward at first because magnus does NOT trust at all and he mostly just wants to keep away from anyone who can... look at him. but they ARE living together (oh my god they were roommates!! just kidding they each have their own room but you get it) so it's inevitable. but like magnus' insecurity makes him keep to himself for long times and makes things awkward, kinda like how the initial days with the beast and belle the beast was rude and kinda shitty except magnus is not shitty, just... private

and maybe the subject even comes up like "thanks for the meal alec. i'll go eat it in my room" "i mean, you could eat here if you want" "and ruin your appetite? no thank you" and alec is just like "*shrug* it won't ruin my appetite. unless you are my parents, the concept of failure, or some girl wanting me to marry her, i don't think there's a lot the spell can do to make me scared. besides, you literally have a kitten on top of your head right now and you refuse to remove it and are using a spell to keep her from jostling when you move" "her name is Fluffy, and she is sleeping!" "right, my bad" "wait did you say the concept of failure?" "yea"

it's not that the spell doesn't work on alec; it does, just like it works on his friends. but he is willing to go beyond that initial repulsive reaction that he knows is illogical anyway (and alec is the kind of guy who is just like "if my feelings aren't logical, i don't listen to them" which in this case is useful lmao). and the thing is that once you get to know magnus there is nothing about him that is scary, and the feeling just becomes completely ignorable, because humans are nothing if not adaptable. but most people don't want to go through the trouble to try, and magnus himself doesn't want to let himself be vulnerable enough to give them a chance because there IS a great chance that he will be met with some level of aggression, even if it's an unintentional microaggression

and eventually they grow closer and build trust. i think this happens particularly when camille steps in for one of her regularly schedule shoving-it-in-magnus'-face visits and alec is just like. "hey why don't you just use magic to keep her away?" and magnus realizes that he never even THOUGHT of that and like, jesus, how much has he been unconsciously torturing himself? so he does it, and he ends up telling alec about the story of the spell, which might be the first time he's told someone that didn't know him before the spell was cast

(alec: "so she's basically just killing you slowly?" magnus: "don't be silly, alexander. torturing me first is the most important part". and he sounds self deprecating and almost resigned and god alec feels murderous)

ohh but wait bonus: magnus says that she will only undo the spell if he gets back with her, he doesn't mention that it technically can be undone by romantic love or whatever bullshit's going on because he doesn't believe it can happen anyway, so, who cares

anyway! time goes by. fun fact: alec and magnus get along really fucking well. magnus is so so smart and knowledgeable and he shows alec many of his inventions that never got to see the light of day or that were stolen by someone else who wasn't cursed and took all the credit. he also fascinates alec with his magic, but mostly with his personality. there's something just endlessly endearing about this guy who is so fucking proud of his puns and so so nice and gentle to every creature he encounters, be it a kitten or a pitbull, who's letting alec stay with him for no reason other than that alec needs it

and alec is so goddamn appreciative of it because like he IS and we stan! and he's always trying to give back to magnus which is kind of a rarity, but most of all he's also extremely funny beneath the whole no-bullshit attitude, he's caring and fierce and resourceful and strong (so's magnus) and they click so well. they can also talk about their similar experiences with like, abuse and trauma without making it super heavy and they're just,,, so supportive of each other. so like yeah surprise surprise they fall in love

but they don't really say anything because (on magnus' part) that's just fucking ridiculous, he's a monster; and (on alec's part) he will put magnus is a way too uncomfortable position if magnus doesn't like him that way and they will just... be living together. and magnus will feel like he has to compensate to alec somehow and alec doesn't want that. it's just complicated when one of them is dependant on the other, and besides, alec has had very little to offer magnus so far

(no, he has no idea how much his company means to magnus and has brighted his depressed ass life. he is stupid)

sometimes magnus' friends visit and they're always just so happy for him, to see how he's hanging out more and let someone into his life after so long. it earns him a lot of forehead kisses and "i'm so happy to see you like this". and over time he starts to invite them over more as well as just open up back to the people in his life :')

angsty but also kind of fluffy sidenote: i picture that every time they kiss his forehead or cheek or whatever they linger for a little while and then open their eyes slowly and sigh like "i had been hoping that it would work this time. magnus, you know i love you, right?" and magnus is all like "i know just from you saying that, darling. it's just not how the spell works" and aaa

and like to be extra clear im not saying that alec fixes him or romantic love heals him or whatever, just that having let someone in, someone who didn't know him before the spell, and have them completely accept him and realize how much he had been missing out re: touch and human contact helps him realize how much he misses his friends and how pushing them away is stupid when they've never been anything if not supportive of him. they don't care that he's cursed. and obviously magnus was already on the way to that if he even managed to let alec in anyway

anyway! dramatic healing scene. LOOK. usually i'd be all for "they don't change back actually because people don't have to look beautiful to be lovable". like the original BATB disappointed me sooo badly because i had just been hoping that he'd stay the same way and still be loved. but in this case it's not that magnus doesn't look beautiful! it's that the spell has made him be hated by people for no reason other than existing. and breaking the spell is not changing magnus himself, it's changing that hatred. so, yeah. i'm not saying it's a deep metaphor or anything, just, you know daudhasdja it's different from the usual monster thing

and i'm torn here because on the one hand i LOVE the drama of the original BATB where everyone decides to gather to kill the beast and belle saves him and shit, but idk if it fits with the vibe ive been building here. no actually @ me shut the fuck up. you know how i mentioned that they kick camille out with magic finally? i actually had no intentions of following through with this in any way but like of COURSE she would be absolutely pissed out of her mind and want to get back in some way, we already know she's vindictive. so i'm gonna use that. this is what neil gailman meant when he said that writing is just making a rough draft and then writing it again but like it's on purpose this time

anyway! so after they yeet her camille is obviously furious and fuming and it might have finally dawned on her that magnus will NOT fucking cave and she is losing power over him, not gaining it. so she decides to play a last card and get him to almost die so he kind of HAS to take her bid, you know? so she makes up some shit about how magnus has kidnapped the lightwood heir and she's only now hearing about it, and no one else is safe and yada yada. and she has "proof" because alec IS indeed there and again the spell just helps everyone easily agree with her that magnus is That Kind Of Guy or whatever, and middle ages ppl weren't exactly waiting for a good enough reason to grab their pitchforks. and they don't even KNOW about the spell, really. all they know is that he's very powerful, secluded, and they all fear and almost hate him just from one look

so camille makes up some bullshit story about how he made a deal with the devil to become extra powerful, and that the source of his powers is the rose, so they have to get rid of the rose to kill him. (sidenote: i never understood why the hell the rose was never used as a weakness against the beast. like was he keeping it super guarded and safe just for the fucking shits?) so they devise an attack so someone can sneak up and get the rose, and camille makes up some bullshit story about how they have to destroy the rose a specific way so it takes longer and she has time to manipulate magnus before he dies. man, it's easy to be a villain when your target is secluded

anyway! big attack at magnus' house. magnus' friends don't hear about it until it's too late because camille knows exactly who they are and warned them that they were on "the witch's" side. alec is maybe away hunting when it happens? camille obviously has magic in this AU so she can check for that information. maybe she even says that she will be the one responsible for finding the lightwood heir so there is minimal risk of him revealing that she lied lmao

oh no, violence! they battle and yada yada. catarina is probably the first one to realize what is happening because i figure she, madzie, and dot are the ones who live closest to magnus'. they send fire messages and get ragnor, simon, maia, raphael, and meliorn to help. oh yeah, and alec i genuinely forgot trust me to forget about romance in a romance-focused au. but alec is the only one of them without any magical resources and he's far away and on foot, so he's gonna be the last to get there, which camille had been counting on

but alec or no alec, they can keep the attackers at bay because they're all powerful and smart and shit and a lot of them have magic as opposed to the mundanes who don't, but of course that's mostly because they are holding off on attacking and the invasion is mostly a distraction because their PLAN is to use the rose. and camille tells them all to leave once the petal puckering starts so she can "protect them from any lashouts" (have her big villain speech). and it's not like any of magnus' friends is gonna leave to go after them when magnus is dying, bUT they also won't attack camille because she's his only hope. and they won't be able to get to stop the rose plucking in time because that's in another room and while she made it slower than something that the person can use to kill him in a second it's also not slow enough for them to get there on time (maybe there's a spell against magic use near where magnus keeps the rose? just for extra safety, so the ones with magic can't portal there or whatever)

anyway. big villain speech. magnus screams in pain every time a new petal is plucked. his friends are either running to the rose thing desperately or trying to get camille to stop this madness, she's going to kill him for fuck's sake. i don't know which chooses to do what so you can figure that out i guess. and for that extra drama, right when the last petal was going to be plucked, wee woo alec lightwood arrives! and he went straight for the rose because magnus had told him about it and he figured that there was a good chance the attackers might go for it. so he shoots the person's leg or something and gets them away from the rose and yay, day saved! mostly. because now there is only one petal left to fall before magnus dies, so at the very least, his lifespan has been shortened considerably. also, he is still in pain

i'm torn about what happens to camille then. on the one hand, i love killing camille! bonding activities for the whole family. on the other, she kinda is the only one who can save him now. they all know magnus won't want to get back with her, but hey, it's not like camille wants a relationship! she wants magnus to be her asset. a relationship was just the best way to get him to do that she had initially. but magnus doesn't want to cave and be dependant of her, so, you know. but maybe they can try to convince her to stop this fucking madness, god knows how

so okay yeah no camille-killing yet because they don't want to jeopardize magnus' safety, so she just leaves convinced that either way, she wins, and this might be the best possible scenario actually because magnus will have lots of times to think it over and be real desperate and come to her and strike a deal. so, yay her! she just needs to lie to the mundanes that the mission was successful or whatever, and it's not like that's gonna be hard because magnus won't want to be seen there again, so

we are all running to check up on magnus now. he's kinda like, on the ground coughing blood, but he'll live for as long as the last rose doesn't fall. still, they all settle on trying to help him, getting him in bed, tending to his wounds, etc. and thinking about what the fuck they are all going to do now. so you have raphael and maia making magnus soup, simon running his mouth as he throws around ideas on how they can fix this, ragnor, cat, dot, and madzie (who is here now that the danger is over ofc) checking and rechecking magnus' vitals for the billionth time and trying to figure out how much time they have, meliorn using their fae powers to stop his pain. and madzie is all snuggled in bed with magnus holding his hand and asking if he wants her to tell him a bedtime story, and magnus just... feels cared for and loved

alec meanwhile i think would tell what ACTUALLY happened to the person who was doing the rose thing - i actually have thought about it and think it might make sense for it to be luke. just because i love him and it kinda fits the whole "initially sided with shadowhunters, lately became a downworlder" thing. and like luke genuinely believed he was saving a person/people so alec brings him in too and magnus is all "catarina, dear, can you help heal his leg? i would, but i don't think i have enough magic right now" because he is the sweetest man immediately wanting to help the guy who almost killed him. and luke is in awe

(and alec brings him on purpose, too, because he knows that anyone who actually talks to magnus for a little while will see what an amazing person he is. and he hopes that luke, as a mundane, can tell the others that and turn them against camille)

and after that, of course, alec sits down by magnus' side and Does Not Leave. he's just there holding his hand and talking to him and magnus' friends, who are all also kind of. sitting there, trying to snuggle up in a gigantic pile of like 10 ppl to cuddle close to magnus and make sure he feels loved and cared for and that they know he is real. madzie gets special privileges in that sense because she's smaller and also a kid, so she gets to be kinda snuggled up with him. so alec has to be content with holding magnus' hand lmao (which he is, he's just happy that he's alive and okay. and he has a whole plan to get camille to undo the spell, mostly involving getting the mundanes against her and telling her that she is only safe for as long as magnus lives, because once he dies, she will have a bunch of ppl who will hunt her down to the faces of the earth to make her pay for what she did to him. the only reason they didn't do that yet is because she can still save magnus' live, so is she really going to let him die knowing that she will be next?)

so alec takes his hand and tells magnus that they will fix this, he promises, and give a little kiss on magnus' hand. just a little peck, no deep intentions, but magnus gasps a little because he feels something, and his eyes water a little bit because he's so touch starved and tired and hurt and alec kissed his hand and he can feel this kind of ache inside him, somehow a good ache, but he just can't explain it. and so alec notices his watery eyes and he very tenderly wipes his tears away and tells him that they're all on his side, will always be, and kisses him on the forehead. and this kiss? this kiss is full of adoration and love and purpose, and magnus gasps and the wounds that hadn't been healed suddenly mend together, and the petals that had fallen go back to the rose before it disappears in a beautiful flash of light, and suddenly magnus' magic is back full force and he just looks at himself for a second, and everyone erupts into joy because holy shit, the spell is broken

and alec is so confused because again! he didn't kNOW about the whole true love's kiss thing or he would have asked magnus to let him kiss him as soon as he learnt about his feelings, because even if magnus didn't feel the same way, alec could undo the spell. and he's like "why the hell didn't you tell me?? we could have fixed this months ago" and magnus is like "i didn't think it would make a difference. wait, you're in love with me? have been for months?" and alec is like "first of all, yes. second of all, i have nothing else to say, i just said 'first of all' because i was so indignant"

and magnus laughs and jumps on him and kisses him on the mouth this time and they are both smiling and laughing into it and so so happy. and raphael is kind of just peppering kisses on maia's face too, like, "you were right, he undid the spell, thank you" and maia was never sure that this would happen but she will take the credit actually please and thank you

and they all live happily ever after and kill camille together the end i guess. god this post was so long i'm so sorry

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Treasure of the Golden Sun: Three Ducks of the Condor or Now with More Racism!

Hello all you happy people! And welcome back to my look at Ducktales: Treasure of the Golden Suns!, the pilot episodes that started it all. This look was one of my patreon stretch goals. To explain them in case some of you aren’t familiar with patreon it’s essentially like a kickstarter stretch goal: every milestone I reach in my monthly earnings means a crop of reviews for you guys, with this being 10 and my review of the movie, and the goofy movies in two weeks and September respectively, being the 15 dollar one. So if you want reviews of the OTHER Ducktales mini series Time Is Money and Super DuckTales, then hop on aboard and help me reach my 20 dollar goal so I can keep making these reviews for a living and give you all more. Said goal also includes a Darkwing Duck review eveyr month AND a review of teh Danny Phantom special The ULtimate Enemy so hop on board HERE AT MY PATREON.  Patrons also get exclusive reviews, access to my discord server (Though if anyone would be more intrersted in me making that public let me know), and to pick a short each time I do a birthday special for a character from Looney Tunes, Disney and Beyond. And next month is my boy Donald’s so since you all already sat out goofy NOW is the time. 

So now my very necessary plug is out of the way, i’m very poor, we can get to the review proper:

When last we left off Scrooge and the Boys went on their first proper adventure together, heading to Central America to follow the map from the first episode and running into Dr.Claw  El Capitan and his new best buddy Glomgold. Mild racisim, moonsoons and much better pacing ensued. 

So join me under the cut as my boy Donald returns, some iconic characters are introduced in Webby, Launchpad and Beakly, though this series only made one of them iconic to be fair, and we get some more mild racisim because fuck my life. Onward to the cut! 

So yeah as I’ve mentioned a few times now this episode had a content warning.. which was fair as there is some pretty cringy stuff in here but it had the side effect of me holding my breath until the racisim came up and whapped me in the face. So i’m keeping that tension up for you guys so I don’t have to suffer alone. 

We open at the Mansion. Scrooge is trying to find a governess for the boys, but they keep scaring off all the clients because they don’t like the idea. And for once.. i’m on Scrooge’s side here. Yes I know there’s a sterotype of rich people hiring a nanny to not have to parent. and it’s sadly often true and it’d SEEM like Scrooge is doing that.. but really he just wants the boys to be safe. He’s fully grown to care for them and just wants someone cheap and responsible to look after them while he’s busy and clearly still makes time for them. As someone who is a former nanny, albeit for someone working class, I get that as much as you WANT to spend every moment with your kid you often can’t. I say all this because SO MANY kids movies and shows villianize parents for not spending time with their kid when their clearly just working to support them. There are nuanced exceptions to this and refreshingly Craig of the Creek has outright avoided this: JP’s mom is gone almost all the time due to working as an airline pilot, but while he clearly misses her he never resents her or guilts her over it, he understands sh’es supporting him and goes out of his way to make sure his friends can meet her. It’s really swee.t And while again I get it, this guys a billionare, most examples aren’t, Scrooge still really CAN’T stop working: He has more money than god and like most bilionares REALLY should give most of it to charity or to help with programs instead of hoarding it in a massive bin.. but he’s also got tons of companies, factories, investments... people COUNTING on him to make sure these are working correctly and keep their jobs. So yeah i’ts nice that the show isn’t demonizing scrooge for this or dosen’t even consider it: he’s getting help beacuse he needs it, that’s what’s important. 

So while the boys widdle down the nannies, Scrooge talks to a renowned coin collector. He does show off his collection to the guy, but his main goal is naturally to show him the coin from last time. Turns out that naturally for a five part episode the treasure they lost last time was just a fraction of the real thing and the real titular treasure is a mythical horde even Scrooge, who normally has proved something out of myth is very real 5 times before breakfast, didn’t think existed. 

Something I do love about this five parter is how every treasure hunt has ended up being important each piece of the puzzle leading to the next like any good treasure hunt. As for where this one leads the collector HAS heard of only one other coin like it, up in the Andes Mountains in a mysterious fortress whose mountain habitat and being a fortress makes it hard to get to and the owner is apparently a real piece of work.. but Scrooge isn’t afraid of a little hard work and is ready to go after it.. he just has to find a Nanny first. 

And he does as there’s only one left: Mrs. Beakley, who we FINALLY meet after two episodes. Yeah for some weird reasont his episode choose to cram the rest of the major main and supporting cast into one episode.. it still works, they all still get great introductions it’s just weird to me when you have five episodes to not say introduce Launchpad last time. 

But regardless as I said it’s a good intro.. despite the boys wilding a lasso and a snake.

 Beakly is unphased and even dosen’t remotely fall for them trying to say she got the wrong name. And while Scrooge is a little impressed, he’s even more when she states she’ll work for free... with one condition: Free room and board for her and her grandaughter, Webby, who has been there the whole time and looking cute as a button. Scrooge is unsure but one minute of Webby being adorable later and he’s agreed. She can’t eat much right? He also hopes she’ll help the boys not be douchebags, unaware that their inherent poorly written sexisim means that was never going to work. And why yes I will call it out eveyr time it happens because it happens every time they have an episode together and only gets worse. 

He goes to Gyro for help and Classic Gyro.. is utterly delightful. While I clearly have issues with Classic Scrooge, whose a greedy poorly aged asshat and the boys, who are sterotypes of male children, Gyro? He’s nice, friendlya nd eccentric, using a delightfully wakcky pogo hat thing to think and takes only a mintue to figure out how to solve a seemingly unsolvable problem and only needs a few hours to build his cool looking bird ship, using bird legs to offset the hard to sort out landing conditions. But since it’s a fancy bitch, it needs a pilot and i’m sure we all know where this is going...but since Carol Danver sis busy he has to go with Launchpad. 

Launchpad’s intro is great, cheerful as he does a job testing a plane and naturally crashes it, and when thought dead walks out seconds later unharmed and jolly as ever. Scrooge is naturally terrified of the prospect of flying with him but dosen’t really have another choice “I hope my insurance is paid up.” Scrooge it’s you.. of course it isn't. 

So with that our hero bids a farewell to the boys and ends up unteitonally coming off MASSIVELY unlikeable. No really he leaves them behind for their saftey despite needing help... and then upon finding out Donald is going to be on leave soon in the andes, and just assumes that YOU KNOW, he’d LIKE to go on a dangerous exausting adventure instead of actually get some rest after working in the goddamn navy and STILL dosen’t take the kids along despite having a very tearjerking farewell IN FRONT OF HIM that happened at most a month ago. Granted i’m suprised Donald is getting leave this soon.. but since I genuinely like to look into this sort of thing and the last time I didn’t I was correctly reminded Gulliver’s Travels was a satire.. and found out someone HAD actually watched the Jack Black movie. I only vaugely remember a trailer.. I thinkn it was a trailer? Maybe it was the middle part of a juinor novelzation where htey have all the photos? I really don’t know. I know almost every pokemon on sight but not where I saw pictures of a forgetable jack black movie, what a shock. 

So long story short I DID google it. Here’s what I got

So given clealry more time has passed than we’ve seen on screen, enough time COULD have passed for Donald’s three day pass to kick in. So credit to the crew for actually thinking that out. They still get all the blame though for not only not seeing how bad not taking the kids to see the uncle whose like a father to them a month after he left when he CLEARLY can is bad, but how worse it is that the first break donald gets ina  month.. is spent helping scrooge against his will on a life or death treasure hunt. 

And I get WHY they wanted to try out having Donald on an adventure: he was in most of the carl barks material.... but I also dont’ get it as Launchpad was deisgned entirely to fill in for Donald when needed, we’re only three episodes into the series and this gives the wrong impression Donald will guest star a lot more. In practice while he still did get a meaty 8 episodes on the show including this one, 2 of which were cameos and the pilot only dosne’t count because of the exnteded slapstick sequence, and dosen’t appear at all after season 1, likely because Fenton’s introduction made him reduntant as he was an even more blatant Donald stand-in. It just feels weird to shove him into the pilot movie when we should be focusing on our main cast, epsecially with so many getting intorduced this episode. It woudl’ve made more sense for Gyro to be the third man instead and it woud’ve elmaited Scrooge’s uttelry horrible actions here of depriving his nephews of their surrogate father. 

So Uncle Dickstick leaves with Launchpad to go abduct donald.... and tha’ts not me being funny, that’s what actually happens. Donald is singing out on leave.. with his superior... weirdly doing paper work outside on the flight deck. 

And is angry at Donald because of him taking pictures and stuff and threatens him if he’s not back exactly in time... because look he’s on a boat with a bunch of sweaty men but as the most superior officer he can’t enjoy that so he has to get off SOMEHOW and ruining donald’s life just happens ot be a thing for him. 

So yeah Scrooge straight up naps Donald via claw and Donald is angry, wondering, as you’d expect “What’s the big idea”.. and once Scrooge clairfies he did it.. still asks that because what the fuck. And the episode treats this as comical, as it does Launchpad not understanding Donald.. and don’t get me wrong you CAN make a good “I can’t understand Donald Duck” joke, the 2017 series made PLENTY. But said series also spoiled me as they did it with far more effort, while also still showing just how much it would suck to have everyone around you struggle to hear what you say and never listen to you. They actually cared abotu Donald’s well being where as this one thinks “Gee you knwo what would go great iwth a hard month’s naval work? MORE WORK HELPING YOUR UNCLE GET RICHER FOR NO PERSONAL BENIFIT AFTER HE KIDNAPS YOU”. 

So our heroes.. and scrooge, head to Andes and find the temple and it’s here “Sigh” we met our antagonist. A Conquestador Douche who DOES have a name and it is on the wiki.. but is so generic and unlikeble I’m just going to keep calling him conquestador douche, whose introduced waving his sun coin around while the natives all bow to him because of the coin.

Welcome to the racisim! Admitely it’s not as bad as Treasure of the Lost Lamp, that’s a high bar to clear, but ti’s still not great to have the racist cliche of “character conquers a civilization because of they belivie he’s a messenger for their “silly” god”. And the saddest part is not that I didn’t notice this trope and how bad it was as a kid watching shows like this... but that as an ADULT about 4 years ago when I watched this episode how racist it and this trope in general was didn’t register to me at all. That.. really bothers me that it took me this long to pick up on things like this and i’m sorry for it. 

That’s honestly WHY we need these warnings and WHY i’m so hard on this racisim: it wasn’t necessary, it could’ve been removed and you clearly just didn’t care or didn’t realize it was racist. And even acceptable for the time dosen’t work for anymore: I learned recently that the creators of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, both white, hired black writers..and actually LISTENED, looking to them for personal stories and to check them if one of the white staff wrote something that wasn’t true to the black experience. I know that sounds like the bare minimum but this was the early 90′s, that kind of thinking wasn’t hte norm like it is in most writer’s rooms now.. and sadly not ALL writer’s rooms. Not only that but just today I ran into a MST3K skit that lampooned this kind of bullshit from not long after this episode. People clearly knew better, the writers of this episode just didn’t’t care

 So yeah, I get this was a kids show in the 80′s, I get the writing staff being almost all white.. but they still coudl’ve avoided cliche sterotypes and done something diffrent. It was was still wiithin white people like myselves power to actually think about something other htan themselves and we did not. So i’m never going to stop holding my own people accountable for just how BADLY we’ve fucked up in ways great and small because it still hasn’t stopped , likely never will so I won’t. 

But yeah.... the tribe here are portrayed as ignorant, mindless dumbasses who blindly follow tradition and a clearly corrupt leader. It’s patronizingly stupid to assume just because a belief system is diffrent than yours a person will belieive anything. Religion CAN make people act stupid, the fact many people are homophobic simply because the bible, a centuries old document written and distrbuted by humans that could of been altered by people with a clear homophobic agenda, says they should be. But there’s the very clear very gross implication here that any god but the christian god is invalid and simplifies wonderful and well thought out myths and beliviefs from various cultures into “well they belivie in da sun god because of the shiny coin”. It’s gross, i’m glad it’s stopped and it’s VERY telling that the closest Ducktales 2017 came to this was the most dangerous game night which while a tad cringe inducing at least showed the tribe it used was clever, disposed the person they mistook for a god after it was clear he wasn’t one , and were wholly sympathetic. 

Naturally Conquistadouche orders the tribe to attack Scrooge and it works briefly , though Scrogoe prepares to take on the ENTIRE villiage.. and given this is Scrooge and on this blog we’ve seen him take on an entire town before, and that was a more inexpericed less bastardly scrooge yeah their fucked, and only escape death because the coin falls out of scrooge’s coat when he tries to help donald who naturally injures himself trying to help. 

And since as per white dumbass racist logic, the villiagers thought Conquistadipshit was a messenger of the gods because of his coin, they think the same of Scrooge, this causes them to stop and bow instead and protect scrooge when Conquistadumbass tries to attack our heroes. Their given a room for the night naturally. 

Conquistadick demands they give him the coin and leave, but Scrooge has none of that: he has no reason to leave and has all the leverage so he instead demands to know wha’ts going on. 

Turns out Conquisineart is the decdendant of one of the crew from the ship Scrooge found: their captain rain off with it, leaving two of his men behind, though both had the map to the rest of the treasure and split it: one left for the Arctic, the other stayed and did the whole racist god bit. And somehow despite all the time passing Conquistadoodoohead still has his half and Scrooge aranges a trade for the coin. And why yes their is the obvious problem of “what if Conquistascoobydoo say tells them he’s the true god and attacks scrooge like he ends up doing in the climax”. And Scrooge’s plan.. is to have the plane ready and to run to it, despite Launchpad not being a mechanic and saying as much. Instead of you know... stealing the guy’s coin while he’s asleep or something or just having launchpad, whose bigger and stronger and donald whose not bigger but is also stronger hold the guy while Scrooge steals his sun coin, then simply walks to the plane with the map, the coins and all the leverage. at worst the guy tries to do the same scheme without any coins and as the end of the episode shows, that wouldn’t have worked. He was stupid. Oh and the cherry on  top of this shit sundae is scrooge objects to the guys tyranical rule.. but is okay with letting it keep going if he gets his coin and DOnlad, whose there for the deal, never call shim on it. 

We then get a bit of Launchpad being forced off a cliff to ride a giant Condor...

Look this episode is filled with racisit sterotypes, a generic villian and Scrogoe being awful. I’ll take a fun sequence of Launchpad riding a condor, with Donald providing an assit with his camera  by blinding the beast so Launchpad can ride him properly giving them more leverage now Launchpad is popular. And a deadline to fix things by tommorow. 

The next day Launchapd and Donald have defied logic and their own tendency to screw up and fixed the bird, while Scrooge makes the deal.. and naturally it goes EXACTLY how you’d expect and Scrooge runs, though our real heroes get thigns running. 

That’s when the people arrive on condors to persue, a fight insues yoru standard hero stuff.. not bad but given the racist context I can’t really enjoy it like Launchpad flying a condor.. which had some mild racisim in them making him do that as a ritual clearly deisgned to kill him but i’llt ake mild over pretty damn obvious. Eventually douchebag looses his coins, his ctizens abndon him. Happy end. 

So with the map Scrooge decides to do the logical thing.... have launchpad drop him in the middle of the ocean in a raft and steer there

Launchpad takes Donald home in time and his superior is mad he dosen’t give him a proper salute.. even though he CLEARLY just got home and is diisorented from a crash. Launchpad makes a quip and this episode mercifully ends. 

Final Thoughts:

This episode starts out okay.. but quickly goes downhill fast and steep. There are massive bits of racisim, massive leaps in logic, and massive amoutns of scrooge being a dick.. not his WORST in this series but it’s still bad. It’s just not very good. It’s the second worst episode of Ducktales i’ve seen, only held up by my boys Donald and Launchpad. This was miserable.

Next Time on Treasure of the Golden Suns: Our heroes head to the arctic for another offensive episode to rescue scrooge from his own stupidity.  Next Time on this Blog: We return to Green Eggs and Ham and hop on a train as our raging bitchcanoe mother and daughter duo meat our ambigiouslyg ay duo at last. 

See you at the next rainbow.

[miss-choco-chips]

The dangers of sugar coating

Dick tries to give his little brother nice things (and fucks up), Tim is paranoid (and too tired to think clearly), and Damian thinks they might actually be a good team (while they plot Santa Claus’ downfall).

(Beacuse @animemangasoul and I decided we’ve been too rough with Tim lately, so I tried to give him some batfamily fluff. Somewhere along the way I fucked up and ended with this. No edit, pure crack)

-----.------

-Before I tell you anything, you need to promise me you won’t get mad.

The Bruce of ten years ago, new to parenting and oblivious to its dangers, would have done his best to emulate any ‘How to be a good Dad- guide for new, utterly lost fathers’ book. Now, though, tired after raising Dick to semi-adulthood and still hurting over Jason’s… Jason, he knew better. Life had toughtened him up.

So he didn’t raise his eyes from his newspaper, and gave into the urge of sipping his coffee before humming under his breath. Not even the slightest show of acceptance over those terms.

If Dick was asking that, instead of hiding whatever this was or dealing with it himself, it meant the situation was either out of his control, bound to make its way to Bruce eventually, or both. 

Probably both.

-Come on, B, just promise you won’t get all passive aggressive bitch on me. I did it for the greater good...

Another hum.

However, Dick has spent the same amount of time learning under his guide than he had raising him, so the younger was bound to develop some of his own tactics.

-...and I did it because Tim obviously needed it, so…

Warning bells ringing in his mind, Bruce gave up and shoot Dick a look. He didn’t seem overly guilty, so whatever this was, it probably wasn’t irreversible. But he was also shifting his weight from one leg to the other nervously, so… there was a catch here.

-What did you do?

-You didn’t promise.

-I won’t take your allowance away, but I may yell. It depends on how convincingly you make your case -compromise, he had learned after many, many mistakes, was as good a plan as any. 

-Deal -then, quickly, like ripping off a bandaid:- I might have made Tim slightly more neurotic than he was. On accident.

The bells turned into firefighter’s sirens. 

-What did you do?

They have had the fifteen year old living in the mannor for a few weeks at most. They couldn't possibly have already broken him, right?

Right?

Dick winced, but sat down by Bruce’s left (the side closest to the dining room’s window), which meant this was the only issue, but a hard to explain one.

-You see… We were talking, bonding over childhood memories and stuff, and… you know how christmas is just around the corner, and I asked him about Santa. I mean, obviously he doesn’t believe in that now, but the thing is, he never did.

-He’s too smart for that -growled Bruce, impatiente to get to the point and figure out just how much damage control would he be doing.

-No, his parents were too shitty. They were never there on Christmas, so no gifts under the tree unless he put them there himself, and whenever that happened, it was because his parents sent them and he wrapped them himself. Also no surprises, because he was the one asking for specific stuff. And I got a little sad, because how can a kid never believe in Santa? Like, come on. It’s part of the concept of childhood innocence. So...

Bruce waited a few beats, but Dick didn’t follow up. See, this was the moment where his parenting books would suggest waiting until the kid was good and ready for sharing his thoughts. But, since this was his younger child at stake here, he couldn't allow himself the luxury of letting a single second go.

-And? -he prompted, as gently as he could, trying not to spook Dick into abandoning ship.

-And I sort of… convinced him that Santa was real. Like, a full out super powered meta whose purpose in life was to bring joy to all of us. I texted Barbara and she planted some old looking reports on the batcomputer about it, to give credibility to the lie. I even drew parallels with Batman being thought of as a myth outside of Gotham to support the ‘Santa is real, people just don’t believe in him’ thing. And, after some hours of convincing and with Babs’ help, he bought it. So now, if Tim approaches you about it, you better back me up, because otherwise you would be ruining the last vestige of innocence Tim might still keep. Downside, though, Tim is now holed up in his bedroom searching the deep web for any Santa related info he can get his nerdy little paws on.

Silence in the room. Dick blurted out a goodbye and jumped out of the window. Bruce didn’t get up to check if he had landed safely on the other side. He probably had. 

Tired, he looked down at his coffee. Black, just like he needed it now.

He should have stopped at zero children.

----.----

Cassie watched, with no small amount of unholy glee, as Tim thoroughly convinced both Kon and Bart of Santa’s existence. One a clone with little social understanding and the other from a very dark future, they were unsurprisingly easy to convince.

This was the kind of hilarious shit that made being in a superhero team worth it. All the life and death situations were balanced out by this kind of drama-like absurdity.

Even better was Tim’s completely fucked up perspective on the matter.

-So you’re saying Santa is not only real, but a deranged psychopath? Who’s probably both a pedofile and a mind controlling scumbag? -Kon tilted his head, both confused and esceptic.

Cassie did her utmost best to keep a straight face while nodding along, as if everything Tim had laid down in front of them made perfect sense. 

-I thought it was stupid, too. But Dick showed me evidence, old reports, both handwritten and digital, and I found footage of Santa sneaking into the Manor when he was still young, deeply buried in the Batcomputer mainframe.

-Couldn’t that video be, you know… made up? -Bart asked, frown unusual on him firmly in place.

-If it was anywhere else? Sure. But this is The Batcomputer we’re talking about. Why would Batman have that kind of thing there? It was too heavily protected to be placed there as decoy for anyone hacking, not like they could ever get over Oracle’s firewalls. Besides, what reason would Batman have to invent this? I’m fifteen, I don’t need the ‘Santa fantasy’. The only believable answer is that Santa is real and very dangerous, and some people have taken his name for capitalism’s sake and made a holiday out of that and some religious backing, to get more people roped up into it. The true mastermind is obviously hiding somewhere out there, and the Christmas propaganda is merely a means to get funding for his devious plots.

Both metas hummed thoughtfully, Superboy even crossing his arms as he examined the pile of photos and papers Tim had laid out in front of them. Bart was nodding, hand cupping his jaw. The looked dead serious.

Cassie wanted to excuse herself to use the toilet (lead lidden because this was Gotham, specifically Tim’s secret place, so of course it was super-proof) so she could laugh her ass off, but the temptation of seeing this trainwreck to its fiery end was too strong. 

It was taking up all of her amazonian training to keep her straight face, though. Diana would be so proud.

-I even searched the deep web for Santa related crimes, and looked up his name in disturbing forums. You wouldn't believe what some people, serial killers and rapists both, do using Christmas as a theme. I couldn't sort through it all, it was that sick.

Kon looked utterly disturbed- So what do we do now? Christmas is just around the corner!

Bart got up and started pacing back and forth- We need to hunt this dude down. Christmas is about goodness and family! We can’t let this, this… psychopath ruin it! Think about the children of the world!!

Oh god, this was getting even better.

-But how? The man sounds like a velocist of some kind, I mean, running and leaving gifts everywhere in the world in the span of a few hours? How are we even gonna catch him?

-Maybe if we dress up as Elves? -Cassie couldn't stop herself from suggesting, voice choked in her effort to be serious, but most likely interpreted by the boys as clogged up on rage- From what Tim wrote here -she raised a paper from the pile, hand shaking- it looks like they are his mind-controlled slaves. If he thinks we ran from his captivity, he might take us to the North Pole with him to brainwash us again… Oh, but I probably shouldn't dress up, so you know, I can be back up if he manages to catch you three…

-That’s a great idea! -Bart’s skinny arms wrapped themselves around her neck, and she took the chance to hide her face in his mane of hair, corners of her mouth twitching up.

-Should I also record it? -she asks, almost begging- In case people don’t believe us later, when we have to explain why we imprisoned Santa.

-Yes, I think that might be wise -Tim conceded, eyes scanning his papers again.

Thank the gods. That tape was going to be Cassie’s most precious treasure forever.

-I think he has a way of controlling people’s minds too. Like, parents and stuff. And then he makes them be the ones to give his children gifts in his name, as a way of gaining their trust. Sick fucker.

-So you think it’s a kinky thing for him?

-Kon, he literally categorizes kids as ‘good’ or ‘naughty’. 

-You are right, we need to stop this bastard.

Cassie loved her boys so, so much. She also owed Dick Grayson the biggest high five.

----.----

Red Hood was just lighting up a cigarette when he saw Red Robin making his way to his rooftop. Cursing, he dropped the entire thing and kicked it away. The brat knew Jason smoked, but Dick had been on his ass lately about being a good brother, and he still felt kinda bad about trying to kill the kid twice, so he was actually trying to set a good example. 

Besides, out of the two possible little brothers to take under his wing, he certainly drew the lucky ticket, because while Dickie had gotten stranded with the pompous brat, Jason had the all around good kid circling his radar more often than not. Like, Tim had broken him out of prison, a little after Jason had done his best to end his life; he couldn't get more forgiving and nice than that. It certainly beat making a murder League child let go of his katana on a nightly basis.

-I need your help.

He blinked. While they certainly had worked cases together in the past, they were always preluded by some kind of smalltalk,  little banter, at least a ‘hello’. Not this straight to the point bullshit.

He had the urge to take out his guns, to protect them both of any threat following Red Robin here. He refrained.

-What’s the matter, babybird? What’s wrong?

Tim looked almost frazzled. The cowl was hanging around his neck, just a domino preserving his identity, and his hair was a knotted mess. Disveleshed was too little a word for his state.

-We need to make a plan to catch Santa Claus before Christmas this year. His reign of terror must end. It’s still not too late.

Yeah, okay, he might need that cigarette after all, to hell with Dick’s bitching. Besides, how bad of a influence could that be, when this kid was obviously already on some kind of drugs? Like, Santa? Really?

-What… do you mean?

What followed was an hour long rant on the dangers of a super powered, evil version of the myth that Tim had somehow cooked up on his mind.

Was this real? The kid looked far too distraught for a joke.

-… Does Nightwing know about this? -whatever ‘this’ was- Bats?

Tim shook his hands frantically. Jason was legit getting worried.

-N was the one who told me about Santa -there, he knew this smelled like a Golden Boy trademark fuck up-, but he seems to be under his spell. Bruce as well. They tried to convince me he is some kind of good-hearted samaritan. Jason -he stated, breaking the no names during patrol rule, a show of just how deep into the rabbit hole he was- you wouldn't  believe what I found on the deepweb. Joker’s yearly special seems tame in comparison.

That, Jason could believe. But he was also fairly sure you could type about any word in the darkest side of the net, and find half a dozen kinky or deranged things that matched. Santa-temed crimes? More likely than anyone would believe. Real life Santa doing the deed? Not so much.

Tim had been too young when Dick lied to his face, most likely. And nowadays, the young vigilante was running on three hours of sleep on a good week. And it wasn’t even too far fetched to believe, on their line of business, specially when dealing with metas and supervillains day in and day out.

Still…

-Kid, I don’t know how to tell you this, but… Santa isn’t real -he told him, slowly, hands raised as if to touch his shoulders but not daring to actually make contact. Tim looked so manic he might actually nerve strike him.

The icy blue eyes were hidden under his mask, but Jason knew from the way he tensed that Tim was terrified.

-He got to you, too -he whispered, almost too softly for him to hear. Then, without giving Jason the chance to inquire further, he turned tail and disappeared into the night.

....

He really needed that cigarette.

----.----

When Drake told the family he was taking Damian under his wing for a case, everyone seemed so happy he couldn't just shoot the other man down. Besides, reluctant as he was to admit it, Red Robin was the superior detective in the entirety of the team, so there would be rewards for taking the blow to his pride and working with him.

He expected to be directed through some easy case, maybe a little puzzling but not too challenging. Or be sidelined while Drake worked through things, so he could learn by example.

This, though, this he hadn’t foresaw.

This case was way more serious.

-How come Father has allowed this depravancy to continue?! -exclaimed Damian, hands gripping the sheets of information tightly- This ‘Santa’s’ influence has been permitted to cement on too many people already! And it keeps growing!

-I know. Fuck, I know. But I can’t get anyone to help me. My team knows, but sadly we aren’t enough. Bruce and Dick don’t believe me, and neither does any other hero I contacted on the matter. It’s just like when B was missing in time; they either think I’m crazy, or try to sugarcoat things, like they would with a baby.

Damian snorted, disbelieving. Whatever his opinion might be on his predecessor, he at least knew to trust his insight in a case. Grandfather himself had recognized his genius on that field.

They were on Drake’s perch, his center of operations outside of Batman’s influence. He would never admit it out loud, but if Damian ever needed his own batcave, it would be just like this one. 

Now, the long table in front of him was completely covered in information, case reports, photos taken from live footage, deepweb forums’ conversations, history books…

-And you say this… monster, targets children?

-I mean, he brainwashes the parents too, but that seems like a plot to both increase his economic funds and to gain the children’s trust.

-How are you so sure they are his objective?

-The parents tell their children Santa is ‘always observing them’, and ask if they ‘have been good’ that year. If they aren’t perceived as obedient, Santa leaves them coal, which incentives them to do their best to change that by next year’s christmas. 

-Maybe the coal and gifts have mind control devices, or some magic?

-My thoughts exactly.

Damian frowns even deeper. He’s glad Drake is taking his detective training seriously, but if father himself is being deceived, he wonders what can the two of them (plus Drake’s team) do.

-What about Todd? Red Hood is proclaimed as Saint Protector of Children in Crime Alley, after all. He certainly has opinions about this ‘Santa’ person. 

Timothy shakes his head- He got Jason too. I suspect he’s been under his control ever since he was a child at the manor. 

-So, we are alone in this.

-Essentially, yes. Thankfully, not everyone celebrates christmas. Some religions flat out forbid it, so we won’t have as much ground to cover when we lay out a trap. We could choose a close by location and plan around it. 

He nods, back straight with purpose. He -and Drake, he supposes- would be freeing Father and Grayson, along with the rest of the victims, from this madman’s control. Maybe even Todd, if he has the time.

-I’m with you on this endeavor, Drake.

-Good. Remember we need to act natural in front of the family. If Santa catches wind of what we’re doing, he might focus his efforts in getting to us. 

Damian wants to say to let him come, he would show him why it's a bad idea to mess with his family. But Drake is, admittedly, the superior detective, and it seems he’s been working on this for a long time now. Damian will defer to his judgement this one time.

Drake’s superior knowledge and Damian’s unrivaled training might be what’s needed to orchestrate this ‘Santa’s’ downfall.

They will be a good team, he thinks.

[moony4pads]

Simon definitely would know how to cook bc he has a single working mother so definitely would need to help around the house and its already been established that he sees himself as one of the caretakers in his family and want to help out. (Also beacuse literally every normal kid has to cook for there parents sometimes, and helps there parents with the cooking) But he probably sees it as a chore- not something he would ever complain about bc there's no need to stress his mum out and he's fine with doing it- but also not something he particularly enjoys. I also don't think that when he does cook he would be slaving away behind the stove for hours creating a masterpiece or anything, he probably just whips up a quick, not super interesting, but overall pretty average dinner after school (something like the spagatti with *gags* ketchup we see them eating in season 1), so that Linda can put her feet up after a long day at work.

Wilhelm on the other hand has never had to cook in his life, and now that he's abdicated he is really excited that he can now do normal things (Sara has definitely complained about how happy Wille is while doing the dishes "he wont stop humming its driving me up the wall", but Simon is just pleased his boyfriend gets to have all the experiences that he missed out on growing up.) So Wille is super excited to try cooking he bought like 1000 different recipie books after he abdicated and Simon even bought him a frog apron when he saw how hyped up Wille was.

The problem is Wille is STRUGGLING to intrepret the recipies, see he wasn't allowed in the palace kitchens, so he never had the experiences of ranting to your parents about god knows what- while they cook and asking questions about everything they do bc ur 5 that the rest of us did, and since he never grew up watching people cook he never got the chance to subconsciously pick up on how to do it! So at first he would be so confused at the terms his recipie books were using, and would scour the web trying to find out "what the fuck simmer means!" stressing that his attempt to make Simon the perfect dinner would fail again (and it did), and even when he gets Simon to explain the terms you know Wille's Autistic ass doesn't understand the relative concepts he uses "What does until brown mean Simon?? There are many shades of brown like technically that chicken I tried to make you yesterday was just a really dark brown... and that was inedible." "Well I cant remeber the exact colour of potatos of the top ofmy head so how do i know if I'll know it when i see it" "And you just said that if you cook things on a really high heat it can burn on the outside with the inside not being cooked through so how do I know if my potatoes are cooked through??? *hyperventilating bc not understanding is making him panic and he keeps on forgetting that this is actually a very low stakes situation*" (Simon had to cuddle him for half an hour and agree to help him make cooking index cards with photos on to calm him down)

And so Willes first hundred recipes are burned or undercooked messes, and Simon has to comfort him after and quickly make something simple for dinner. But Wille is a man on a mission, more specifically a mission to be able to make the delicious Venezuelan dishes that Simons abuela always made and that Simon always misses (bc he and his mother never have the time or energy to make) and he will not be dettered. And after months of failed attempts he learns from his mistakes and learned that due to his total lack of skills and prior knowledge even a simple roast was to advanced to start, and he would have beter luck starting with recipe books designed for kids because they introduce concepts well and build up difficulty... he improves! And once he managed to get that feel for it he gets beter and beter and pretty soon is pretty great at cooking (bc he already had the patience and the dedication and now he has the skill) and even expirementing with recipies!

Which Simon loves bc Wille cooking is the cutest thing ever (he stims comfortably like no one is watching and is so giddy with happiness when anything turns out well) and now he doesn't have to worry about putting out any fires, and while Simon and Linda would just cook to have something to eat Wille cooks to have an expirence while eating (basically it's delicious.) And Wille loves it because this is is something he enjoys so much and he knows he would never have been able to do this all if he hadn't abdicated!

And it even helps him connect with Simon's family, bc after Wille cooked Linda's favorite meal for her for her birthday (which he perfected after shyly asking Simon for his abuela's number so he could get tips) and he saw her wipe away a tear, he knew there was no way she had lingering anger towards him for everything that went down. And Linda, Salice and Wilmon go to vist there family in Venezuela (a trip that Simon reluctantly agreed to let Wilhelm help pay for after realising how much his mother missed her home country), and Simon's abuela LOVES Wilhelm, and they spend most of there days just cooking side by side and chatting. And Simon gets a little emotional seeing his boyfriend -whose own mother was cold and distant growing up- finally have a warm affectionate mother figure in his life who loves him unconditionally, shares his intrests and celebrates him for who he is. And Simons abuela threatens to not let Wille leave and pretty soon they have a triweekly video call with her and and and

So yeah basically I think Simon can cook but isn't at all passionate about it, but Wille loves to cook for him after he learns, I am so normal about them I swear

Pls someone write this as a fic now bc I just spent FAR to long thinking and writing about this for nothing

who is the cook of the two??

👨‍🍳

[longing-and-heartache-and-lust]

the drug, the dark, the light, the flame, Ch.XVI.ii

[previous] [next] [Ao3]

The last chapter of my work for this year’s @geraskierbigbang in collaboration with my favourite @gen-syz-art as my artist 💕 I cannot belive this is almost over

_____________________

Jaskier’s blue eyes cut so deep into him, they reach his heart.

Geralt’s first instinct is to hold his hand out, almost as if to show that he’s unarmed, that his words are not meant to hurt.

Jaskier looks at him for a few silent, endless moments, not a hint of sleep left in his eyes, and there are so many emotions in his scent that Geralt can’t pick them apart.

Finally, very slowly, he asks:

“Are you sure?”

Geralt nods, throwing the blankets off and getting out of bed, offering Jaskier a hand.

“Come,” he says softly. “Look for yourself.”

Not immediately, but Jaskier places his hand in Geralt’s, his fingers trembling slightly. Geralt squeezes them a little harder, reassuring and warm.

In the silence of the early morning, he can hear Jaskier’s heart beating in his chest, fast and hard, like a trapped bird. His chest rises and falls heavily, like he’s holding back panic, and though Geralt desperately wants to do something about it, calm him down, he knows that right now the only thing he can do is wait.

They make their way to the tall standing mirror in the far end of the room - an exact replica of the one that broke a few weeks before - and Jaskier stops in front of it, looking at his reflection for a long, drawn-out moment before turning around to look over his shoulder.  

Where there used to be a glowing mark in-between his shoulder blades, his skin is now clear.

Jaskier looks at himself for a very long moment, not even breathing, his blue eyes welled up with tears that he stubbornly holds back, and then he’s taking his hand away from Geralt’s and reaching for his warm dressing gown.

He throws it on, tightening the belt with unsteady hands, and, before Geralt can stop him, runs out of the room.

Geralt curses under his breath, reaching for his own discarded clothes, and dresses up as quickly as he possibly can, thankful to all the gods he knows that the long years spent in training at Kaer Morhen taught him to do so in record time.

It barely takes him a minute.

As he runs out the door, he can hear Jaskier’s retreating steps somewhere on the first floor. The staircase seems even more endless than usual, a five-story descent making Geralt slow down, and when he finally catches up with Jaskier, he’s already outside.  

He’s barefoot, but standing in front of the gates, he doesn’t seem to notice the snow under his feet.

Jaskier’s breath is heavy, and Geralt holds back from touching him, unsure if the bard’s even aware of his presence.

He pushes on one of the arches of the gates, and it opens soundlessly, leaving an imprint in the fresh snow.  

There’s just one step between Jaskier and his freedom, and Geralt doesn’t have to be a witcher to know that he’s scared to take it.

“Jask,” he calls softly, coming closer and carefully putting a hand on his shoulder. “Do you want me to go out first? So you can hold my hand?”

Slowly, almost like he’s still dreaming, Jaskier meets his eyes and nods.

His dressing gown slips from one shoulder, revealing the fair, flawless skin underneath, and Geralt wants to reach out to fix it, but he knows that right now every touch is overwhelming for Jaskier, so he makes himself hold back.

Stepping behind the gates feels like stepping over a threshold, even for him, and when he extends his arm towards Jaskier, offering him his hand, the bard hesitates, eyes downcast.

“I’ve tried so many times,” he says quietly, barely above a whisper. “I stopped last year. Almost made myself forget. And now that I’m back here again-- if it doesn’t work, I feel like I’m going to break down.”

Geralt finds it hard to take in a breath, but he makes himself do it, regardless.

“Jaskier,” he says, keeping his voice soft and comforting. “Your mark is gone. You told me yourself that it was the seal of the curse, and that once it was broken, the mark was going to disappear. Just take my hand. Trust me.”

In the pale morning light, Jaskier’s eyes are two bottomless lakes, welled up with tears.

Very slowly, cautiously, he raises his hand and places it in Geralt’s before closing his eyes and taking a step beyond the gates.

***

Geralt isn’t sure what exactly he was expecting.

A flash of light, a burst of energy, perhaps.

Maybe he was expecting the invisible wall to shatter and fall into pieces, like glass.

But when Jaskier steps beyond the gates and into his arms, nothing disrupts the still morning air.

The barrier of the curse is gone, like it had never existed.

For a long moment, it’s quiet, not even a birdsong to cut through that silence. Until, finally, Jaskier takes in a shuddering breath, and presses himself to Geralt, holding onto his shoulders so tight that there are going to be bruises in an hour or two.

Geralt holds him, close, as he shakes.

“It’s broken,” he says softly, touching his lips to Jaskier’s tousled hair. “You’re no longer bound to the mansion.”

And that is when it happens.

Jaskier looks up at him, tears shining in his impossibly blue eyes, and breaks away, taking three unsteady steps towards the forest before falling onto his knees and doubling over, hiding his face in his hands as his walls finally crack, and he breaks down, crying.

Geralt’s heart rips apart in his chest at the sight, at the choked, stifled sobs, and he crosses the distance between them quickly, reaching out to touch, but before he can the warmth of Jaskier’s skin against his fingertips, there is a blinding flash, and a wave of energy so strong that it knocks him off his feet, into the snow.

His medallion hums violently against his chest, and even through the haze of shock in his head, Geralt immediately knows exactly what it is.

He feels it, with his entire being.

Magic.

Jaskier’s magic.

Geralt's head swims with it, the ringing in his ears relentless, and he has to drag a hand over his face for the dark spots in front of his eyes to dissappear.

Around the bard, there is no more snow.

Instead, where he kneels, his head still in his hands, the ground is bright with fresh grass, countless yellow buttercups peppered all over it, like Jaskier is the Sun itself.

The shockwave goes through the forest around them, across the quiet gardens of the mansion, and long past them, making the treetops whisper in a rustling echo, the windows jolting in their frames and then steadying again.

Geralt’s own thoughts come back to him:

Magic like this is too strong to rely on the curse, it starts in his blood.

Jaskier doesn’t seem to even notice it, his chest still constricting with sobs, and it’s only when Geralt finally makes it through the barrier of his magic and touches him gently on the shoulder that the bard’s head snaps up and he blinks, as though waking up from a troubled sleep.

He looks around himself, tears still shining in his eyes, and, still trembling, runs the tips of his fingers gently over one of the buttercups, as if to check if it's real.

His touch leaves an imprint of gold on the delicate petals.

“I still feel it,” he whispers, looking at his hands as his magic slithers around them in shifting lights of gold and blue. “And it’s so strong-- As strong as it had been yesterday, at midnight. How can it still be so strong, Geralt? How can I still have it?”

There’s a panicked edge to his voice, and Geralt drops to his knees next to him, pulling Jaskier into his arms and holding him there, safe and warm against his chest.

His own heart is beating too fast for a witcher, and all the unanswered questions make him feel lightheaded and overwhelmed, but right now, the only thing that matters is Jaskier.

He's trembling all over, and Geralt knows that it's not beacuse of the cold.

“You’ve always had it,” Geralt says softly, the magic affecting him, making his skin burn with the intensity of it. It’s a heady, intoxicating feeling. “It’s in your blood. Has been since you were born, or from a very young age, one that you can’t even remember. I've seen magic like this before, though only a few times, and the sourse is always the same.”

Jaskier listens to him, going quiet, and Geralt can feel his pulse slowly - very slowly - get back to its normal rhythm.  

After a few long moments, Geralt gathers enough courage to ask:

“Do you know if anyone else in your family has magic? Or at least some hints of it? These things can skip a generation sometimes. It could've been your grandmother, women are more likely to pass it on to future generations.”

Jaskier shakes his head, barely enough to notice and, after a moment, says:

“When you asked me whether or not I’m a prince, there was one thing that you were right about even then: I’m a bastard. My father has always loved me as his own son, and raised me as his heir, but I’m not his. I don’t know who’s blood flows in my veins.”

With those words, everything comes together.

The childhood spent at court, the Academy, the taste for art and knowledge, the magic - all of it.

And that same thought, the one that had been with Geralt for the past six months - an illegitimate prince, hidden from the world.

Just not the human world.

Power like that can only flow through the veins of those strong enough to control it. Can only be held in blood as cultivated and carefully shaped as the finest of wines.

Royal blood.

Geralt sucks in a breath, suppressing a thrill that goes through him, and holds Jaskier closer, just breathing him in without saying anything. Here, in his arms, he’s safe, and there is no need for any other words.

If Jaskier doesn't know who's blood flows in his veins, then the only person who does is his mother. Whether it was forbidden love that had left her with a child and a broken heart, or a pre-discussed arrangement, the one thing that was certain is that twenty six years ago, her path had crossed with a fae - or perhaps an elf - of royal blood, most likely a King, and he had given her a son.

A son that had to be protected from his own people, for they never would have accepted a human woman into the royal family, and her child would've been hated, if not killed.

Now that the curse was broken, there was a chance that she remembered Jaskier again.

And remembered his biological father.

Geralt takes in another deep, steadying breath, running his fingers through Jaskier's hair and murmuring sweet comforting words against his dark, tousled hair.

If Jaskier decides to go though with this, there are going to be dozens, hundreds of questions they’ll have to find the answers to, but all of that will come later.

Right now, they both can just breathe.

"It's cold out here," Geralt whispers after a few long minutes, too aware that Jaskier is wearing nothing but a dressing gown, his feet bare. "Let's go back insine, my love. Back to bed. Would you like that?"

Jaskier looks up at him from under his long lashes, and, after a long moment, nods, bracing his hand against Geralt's shoulder to stand up.

"I feel like I need about twelve more hours of sleep," he smiles, tiredly. "Will you stay with me?"

Geralt gets up and reaches out to hold his hand, both to make sure Jaskier keeps his balance and to ground him.

"Of course," he says. "I'll stay for as long as you need me to."

[weloveharrypotter]

Rebellion Pt. 6

Pairing: Molly Weasley ii x Percy Weasley

Summary: Molly had hit her rebellious years. But Percy is noticing how much different her rebellion is compared to what he read about. He’s trying to figure out what’s wrong with his daughter, whilst also trying to handle her acting out. (Molly is 15 and Lucy is 11. There mother left when they were young.)

Warning: cussing, breakdown, yelling, angst, sadness?

It had been a couple months since Molly stormed out of the burrow. Percy has tried to contact her multiple times, but Molly never responded.

In fact the second she saw who sent them, they were thrown out. Molly even skipped a couple of family weekends.

Molly was drawing on herself as the door knocked. She put a cap on the marker and got up.

Molly headed to the door and opened it to see James standing on the other side with a letter.

“Hey.” Molly said.

“Hey, you dad sent me two letters. One telling me to make sure you read this one, and then this one.” He said holding the letter out.

Molly roller her eyes and grabbed it. She went to close the door but James stopped it from closing.

“What?” Molly asked.

“I have to make sure you read it.” James answered.

Molly huffed and opened the letter.

Dear, Molly

I know you are angry with me, and I have no idea why. I want to know. That’s why you will come to the family weekend this week. You must come or I will pick you up from school myself the following day. We need to talk weather you like it or not.

Sincerely, Dad

Molly closed the letter and put it back in.

“What’s it say.” James asked.

“I’m going to the family weekend.” Y/n explained and closed the door.

Molly threw the letter away and laid on her bed, letting her mind roam around.

—————————

All of the kids were back at the burrow for a weekend. Molly had avoid as many people as possible.

She leaned against the wall watching her family interact.

Percy walked up and leaned against the wall next to her. He looked down at his daughter who was clearly not happy to be here.

“We’ll talk after dinner.” Percy said.

He stayed for a moment to get a response. He quickly realized that he wasn’t getting one, so he pushed himself up and than walked away.

—————————

Everyone was sat down eating. Despite there being conversation, the tension between Percy and Molly was intense and noticeable.

Molly didn’t eat much, mostly just pushing a few things around, and Percy took notice of that.

Molly remained quiet thinking about what was soon to come, and so did Percy.

—————————

It was after dinner and soon enough, Percy was going to exuse both molly and him.

That’s when Lucy ran up to her dad worh a paper in her hand.

“Dad look! I got a 100% on my test!” Lucy said excitedly.

“Good job Lucy. I’m proud of you.” Percy said.

Molly stood still as she heard her father say that.

Percy told Lucy he was proud of her.

Molly hadn’t heard him say that to her in years. Molly could feel tear swel up, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold them back.

She ducked down the hall and past a few family members who asked what was wrong.

She walked into a bathroom, and closed the door behind her. She leaned against the wall and sat down.

She brought her legs in and put her elbows on her knees, and covered her face, letting her self melt down.

The door opened and it revealed James. His heart melted as he saw the state his cousin was in.

James immediately got to the floor and pulled Molly close to him. He hugged her and cradled her.

That brought the attention of her Uncles Ron and Harry.

They looked at each other than back to Molly. They both kneeled down.

Harry rubbed his nieces back comfortingly.

“What’s wrong, Molly?” Ron asked.

Molly shook her head as she leaned into James more.

That’s when familiar footsteps walked toward the bathroom where they were.

Percy look to see what the commotion was and his heart broke when he saw his daughter breaking down.

Percy walked through Ron and Harry, but Molly noticed him, and stood up. She rushed out wiping her tears.

Molly almost got out of the house when her father grabbed her.

Molly turned around and shoved him off.

“Fuck off!” She yelled through tears.

“Molly what’s wrong?” Percy asked concerned.

“Oh you don’t care.” Molly said.

“Of course I do, what made you think I don’t.” Percy asked.

“Beacuse you don’t love me!” Molly screamed.

Percy’s face dropped to one of shock and confusion.

“Oh don’t give me that look! It’s always ‘I’m so proud of you Lucy’ and ‘I love you lucy’. But fuck me, right!? Because I don’t matter. It’s been years since I heard you say that to me. And you know what, dad!? After a while it get old having to hear ‘oh you should be more like Lucy.’ Guess what dad I’m not her! I’m not Lucy, ok! I’m me! I’m Molly, and I’m so sorry that that’s not good enough for you. I’m so sorry that I’m not like your perfect little angel.” Molly said breaking down.

“I can’t sit here and listen to it any longer. I get it you love her more, but stop dragging her out here to just rub that in, Beacuse I can’t do it anymore, I can’t. I’m so tired. So I’ll leave you and your favorite, to be happy, ok?” Molly said before she ran out.

The family was quiet shocked and stunned. Percy didn’t know that’s how she felt and god did he regret so many things.

He could believe he made her feel unloved, and he can’t believe Molly thought she wasn’t good enough.

I pulled on his coat and ran after her after his shock passed.

But it was too late. Molly had already ran, and she was no where to find.

————————

Thanks for reading y’all. Hope you enjoyed this new part. ❤️❤️

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XXVII)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

Missing You

(7x09/7x12/7x14/7x15)

Hello my friends! I bring to you another volume from this series of metas.

Today is Edlund time!!! So we'll have a lot of Destiel here and Dean missing Cas badly, and being miserable for him too. Thank you Edlund.

I want to say thank you to my friend @agusvedder , she made the gifs for this meta and discussed with me the episodes.

Let's start this...

Edlund put order and re-direct the storyline

When episode 7x09 How to Win Friends and Influence Monsters started, I saw order and direction for the first time in many episodes. Edlund wrote a STOP sign on the road, and writes things as it should be.

1) He takes the Hallucifer storyline again.

2) He explains DEAN IS IN BAD SHAPE AND IS SUICIDAL BECAUSE HE MISS CASTIEL.

These two VITAL points, will be imprescindible for the second half of the season, and I guess the decision of getting back Misha Collins had been taken already, and they had to change things because COMING BACK TO WHAT THE SHOW WAS JUST THE TWO BROTHERS and playing A LOT with Wincest was lowering the rating.

Dean misses Cas

In this episode, we had people eating food with that substance Leviathans had put on corn syrup, and everyone was like intoxicated with it, acting like zombies. Dean was in the first stage, so he began to act weird.

Sam and Bobby noticed this, they pointed this to him, and Dean talks in self defense, but is very, very interesting the thing he mentioned first of all... Remember they were with their defense mechanism lowered, so his brain acted like a drink or a child, without strains, so... Look what Dean said...

"The best I felt in months..."

Okay, let's stop here... Dean is stoned so his words are the very truth coming out from his most repressed feelings... He had been depressed and suicidal the last months... He was feeling really bad, sad, hopeless... Why??? Because he killed Sammy's friend? That Kitsune woman?? No. Beacuse of Castiel! (Thanks Edlund)

Cas? Black goo? I don't even care anymore. 

Right there! 👆 He mentioned Cas, Black Goo, the way Cas died, Castiel is in his mind the whole time. Is Cas the reason why he's in bad shape. He misses Cas. Badly.

Then, after this, Bobby attacks again, because he's seeing in Dean this suicidal behavior that worries him a lot. Knowing loosing Cas was the thing that marked Dean deeply Bobby tries to talk with him again...

BOBBY: I want to talk about your new party line.

DEAN: Party? What are you talking about? I don't even vote.

BOBBY: "The world's a suicide case. We save it, it just steals more pills"?

DEAN: Bobby, I'm here, okay? I'm on the case. What's the problem?

And as always... Dean is avoiding the topic again...

I'm on the case, I'm concentrated on this, don't put my head in thinking about that again.

BOBBY: I've seen a lot of hunters live and die. You're starting to talk like one of the dead ones, Dean.

DEAN: No, I'm talking the way a person talks when they've had it, when they can't figure out why they used to think all this mattered.

BOBBY: Oh, you poor, sorry... You're not a person.

Okay, here... Dean talks in third person, but what he says is legit, it comes from the bottom of his heart. But Bobby wants more from him. And because he is honest, Bobby is afraid Dean is trying to kill himself by doing the kamikaze thing. So he needs Dean to confront his lost and work on it.

BOBBY: Come on, now. You tried to hang it up and be a person with Lisa and Ben. And now here you are with a mean old coot and a van full of guns. That ain't person behavior, son. You're a hunter, meaning you're whatever the job you're doing today. Now, you get a case of the Anne Sextons, something's gonna come up behind you and rip your fool head off.

What Bobby is trying to say here is YOU WERE A PERSON ONCE, NOW YOU'RE A CRAZY SUICIDAL GUY. He mentions Lisa and Ben because that's the idea of a normal life a person that came out from the hunter life wants. And that's what Sam, Bobby even Cas thought Dean wanted for himself.

This is heartbreaking, Bobby is desperate, because Dean doesn't take his words seriously. He even use words wrong by the end of the speech. But Dean gets the message.

Dean was a person once. He had faith, he had his best friend, he had a thing not so Platonic growing in his heart for him, he trusted him, he was his savior. But he betrayed him, and when they were about to solve things, Cas was gone.

Of course he's depressed and suicidal... Because he not just lost Cas, but everything he represented in Dean's heart and soul.

During the episode, we discover the monster committed suicide... As a parallel with as in the river.

In episode 7x13 The Slice Girls, Sam talks about Dean's behavior too...

SAM: You know what? Bobby was right. Your head's not in it, man. When Cas died, you were wobbly, but now...

DEAN: Now what? Oh, what, you're dealing with it so perfect? Yeah, news flash, pal – you're just as screwed up as I am! You're just... bigger.

(...)

SAM: Look... Dean, the thing is, tonight... It almost got you killed. Now, I don't care how you deal. I really, really don't. But just don't – don't get killed.

Okay, they're having finally the conversation, because now Bobby is dead, and everything is out of control. But is interesting the word Sam choose to describe Dean's shape after Castiel's death... "Wobbly" like loosing stability. He had just lost his strengths, Cas, and that's sad but beautiful at the same time.

And I can't forget episode 7x14 Plucky Pennywhistle Magic Maneuverism where Dean wanted so so badly his rainbow toy... Exquisite.

Two Destiel dark mirrors

Then we have two blatant Destiel's mirror in episode 7x12 and 7x15.

Let's began with 7x12 Time after Time, after time.

In this one, Dean traveled accidentally back in time with Elliot Ness who's a hunter too, to kill Chronos.

And we had at the beginning of the episode a very bi-Dean scene very well known by the fandom, remember Dean checking out a soldier in uniform in the street? Yeah.

But we'll, back to Chronos, when they were about to hunt him, he said a very interesting thing...

CHRONOS: Lila, I'm sorry, but, you just – everything I said to you is true –

DEAN: Oh, he might have left out a few details. He tell you he's a monster who jumps through time?

CHRONOS: [shouting at DEAN] I'm a God! [speaking to LILA] Look, I'm not a monster. Listen. I'm the opposite.

Chronos is trying to convince Lila, his lover, about his true identity, but pay attention to his words... Is a recall to what Dean and Cas had to live when CAS was on the dark side. Even the word God is a reminder of Godstiel.

Let's continue...

ELIOT NESS: Well, don't forget to tell her about all the people you murdered along the way, boy scout.

LILA: What?

CHRONOS: It's not like that. I do it for you, Lila.

LILA: I don't understand.

Okay are we again on that cabin with CAS trapped in the fire?

The word boy scout it talks about a good, kind and nice person that make things to help others. So we could call that Cas too, because he thought he was doing what he was doing for the greatest cause.

Now... Chronos says those words to Lila "I do it for you." And that's to put a finger on our wounds, people... Yes the same phrase Cas repeated to Dean.

Let's leave Chronos right here, and continue with episode 7x15 Repo Man (Edlund's).

I want to point here, this one was a blatant mirror, written so exquisitely by Edlund, and choosing each word, to make us see how Dean was feeling about loosing Cas... Pay attention...

JEFFREY: Did you ever think that maybe I loved being possessed? Did you? 

Now, the word connection here, as a mirror of the profound bond between Dean and Cas. Dean loved it.

Castiel saved Dean from Hell, we can say he liberated Dean from perdition. Then, he gave him faith, a purpose in his life. A new and true mission.

Again... Cas was his faith, his strengths. He changed Dean's life for ever.

Okay, isn't this a description of what Dean is feeling now? Jeffrey is describing Dean's behavior and cause of his depression by describing his own experience with the demon. And is beautiful, because this is previous to Castiel's return in episode 17. Like a premonition, a preparation.

Yes, my friends, Edlund is emphasizing DEAN IS IN BAD SHAPE, SAD, DEPRESSED, SUICIDAL, FOR CASTIEL.

After this, Jeffrey can summon the demon, but he possesed another body, and not him. And he gets jealous, well, this is kind of hilarious because when Dean found Emmanuel, he was married with his female version, but, it felt kind of a cheating, isn't? Okay, we could say... This is a foreshadow to that. 🤣

To Conclude:

These episodes written by Edlund showed us Dean was in bad shape because of Cas. Drawing a couple of Strong's points like Dean being stoned and talking without strains about his feelings and Cas and Bobby talking with him because he sensed his suicidal behavior.

There was two dark Destiel mirrors, but the one that was a blatant and heartbreaking was Jeffrey and his demon. We could say each word Jeffrey said, it was Dean talking about his lost connection with Castiel.

These episode were a preparation to Misha's return in episode 17.

I hope you enjoy this Chronicles! See you in the next one!

Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73

If you want to be tagged, please let me know.

If you want to read the previous season 7 chronicle, here's the link. Vol XXV and vol. XXVI.

Buenos Aires September 4th 2019 8:24 PM

[mbti-notes]

I wanted to know, please, if the time we ~spend~ being in the grip is a waste? beacuse I have to be honest it's been 4 yers since I've started to develop my aux and I have been failing since I've started, I already sent you a lot of texts and you r always telling me that I am not getting it right to develop my aux. I wanted to know if it`s normal to take that long/ to fail again and again AND for the love of god, what can I do to accelarate? What can I do to spped up he process? thank you! enfp

It seems that you don’t understand the process of function development. If you frequently suffer from inferior grip, then your dominant function is quite unhealthy, which makes it next to impossible to develop your auxiliary function. When Ne is unhealthy to extremes, you aren’t able to explore ideas and possibilities with an open and objective mind, thus you aren’t able to envision positive paths forward. And how can Fi-aux make good judgments/choices when there are no good options available other than desperation or pessimism? You are in self-pity rather than examining your problem, so there’s not much I can say. It sounds like you’re unhappy, and instead of facing up to that unhappiness and making the appropriate changes, you keep trying to ignore, suppress, or sidestep it, which only makes it worse over time. This is the opposite of Fi development.

WRT self-development, learning well requires:

1) knowing the proper way of doing things: Do you know and respect the proper process/procedure of achieving a goal (Si)? Do you follow instructions well (Si)? Do you think that things should always be easy if you just “believe” hard enough (unhealthy Ne)? Do you think that the rules of success shouldn’t apply to you because you always convince yourself that you know what’s best despite no evidence that you do (delusional Ne-Te)? Are you impatient and believe that you can take shortcuts or skirt the rules without suffering negative consequences (Te loop)? Do you pursue success for the right reasons, or do you merely want it to distract from self-loathing (Te loop)? Do you take care of your health (Si) and give yourself the work-leisure balance needed for maintaining your energy and motivation levels (Fi)? Do you have effective methods of managing the stress of challenging work or do you always push yourself too hard (Fi-Te)?

2) making mistakes and learning from them: Do you assess your mistakes honestly and directly, to discover the actual cause of what went wrong (Te)? Are you willing to completely change your attitude and approach when it obviously gets you bad results (Te)? Do you respect the hurt that you’ve experienced from past mistakes and use the memory of it to guide your decision making towards better health and well-being (Fi-Si)? Are you willing to make difficult choices and exercise self-control in resisting temptations whenever it is necessary to protect your well-being (Fi-Si)? Do you waste time whining, blaming, rehashing, ruminating, or beating yourself up for failing rather than simply feeling your hurt, licking your wounds, learning the lesson, and moving on (Si grip)? Do you make excuses for failure or bad decision making (Te loop)?

The learning process isn’t linear because it’s hard to break old habits. It’s hard to break a mental habit when you don’t even know it exists, when you don’t understand how it works, when you don’t know what triggers it, and when you can’t admit that it grants you egotistical benefits you don’t want to give up (e.g. People procrastinate when they get “gratification” by doing something more fun than the work - they want the fun-in-the-moment more than achieving the future goal). Have you done the self-reflection that is necessary to understand what your bad habit is and break it? You need a certain level of self-awareness to know what causes a negative pattern, and sometimes the only way to obtain that self-awareness is to make repeated mistakes that bring the pattern out into the light of day for everyone to see. To break an old pattern requires learning a NEW lesson, a NEW way of thinking, or a NEW method of doing things that replaces the old way. Unfortunately, many people have to repeat the mistake as many times as necessary until they finally learn that changing to a new way is necessary. That’s why cognitive dysfunction is often a slow and gradual descent to rock bottom as some people require the jolt of hitting a rock bottom to finally get themselves on track. In that sense, being in the loop/grip is never a “waste” because it’s a necessary part your learning process. But you cannot accept this reality, so you suffer for your wishing thinking that reality “should” be otherwise.

The fact that you ask me how to “accelerate” means that your attitude is all wrong. You’re not approaching the problem seriously by telling me the exact steps you’ve taken to “develop Fi”, you’re not patiently reviewing your Fi missteps with a fine-toothed comb, you’re not taking time to appreciate any progress that you’ve made, rather, you’re issuing self-condemnations, throwing your hands up in the air, and begging for miracles. This blog is not for venting; it’s for reflection. You’re looking for easy answers and I don’t have any, so stop asking me for them unless you enjoy disappointment. When you only care about “end results”, you’re never fully present in your life, and worst of all, you won’t find the right path because you’ll settle for ANY path as long as you imagine it’s “faster” for you -> Te loop. When you’re constantly looking for escape or shortcuts, it’s easy to get yourself lost, because your attention is always scattered from all the scanning about, and your focus is actually just on avoiding your negative emotions, as opposed to appreciating the bumpy process of learning and growing into a better person. Face up to your negative emotions, listen to what they are trying to tell you.

[magicshoppurple]

The 25 Journal Prompts For Self-reflection (now answered)

1. Two words/phrases that make me laugh

I hate snakeu. I don't know, it's just an army thing. But it kind of makes me laugh everythime i think about it.

2. My life in 7 years

In 7 years, I'm gonna be 27. So i want my life to be happy. Been to Venice already, to South Korea, Japan. Met BTS, GOT7, and Ed Sheeran. Pursuing my career as a writer. No boyfriend. Built my parents a good house. Bought a farm land. Bought 2 boats, one for fishing the other for touring. Have a car. Lots of books. Written many stories. Living with pets.

3. What do i need to get off my chest today

A good cup of coffee, i guess. With a pen in hand and a paper to write on. Just like the good old times.

4. How can i simplify my life in little ways

An island girl, living an island life. Pet lover and writer with a heart.

5. What advice should i give myself right now

Don't let love take your dreams away.

6. How can i make time for things that bring me joy

Just wake up early and do some stuffs. A lot of time in the morning. Pure silence. No distractions.

7. What makes me happy

This may vary all the time. But this time, what makes me really happy is that i passed the civil service exam that i lost hope for and went on a ten-day vacation with my mom and sister.

8. Ten interesting facts about myself

1. I love music.

2. I love Kpop.

3. I love reading.

4. I love watching Kdramas till 3 am.

5. I write blogs about stuffs that inspire me

6. I love animals.

7. I love history.

8. I love movies.

9. I love adventure.

10. I can swim.

9. Five fears that i have

1. Physical darkness

2. Psychological darkness

3. People that cannot be trusted

4. Forgotten dreams

5. Unknown future

10. What am i thankful for

Right now, i am thankful that i just came back from our vacation safely.

11. Five things i would like to do more

1. Writing

2. Reading

3. Going out to see the sunrise

4. Playing with my pets outside

5. Helping my mother doing the house chores

12. Things i love about this time of my life

About this time of my life, i think i love my newly bought blue notebook, the chinese movie i just watched earlier, the ferero nutella that my uncle just gave us, the kdrama Touch Your Heart that makes my heart really flattered, Lee Dong Wook and Yoo In Na. I also love being back home and seeing jungkook, chimchim, tofu, kalderen, kabo, and smeagol. And, the couch i am lying on right now. Also, the feeling that i got inspired to write again.

13. How do i relax

Most times, it'd be lying on the cough watching tv. Other times, It'd be sleeping on the hammock while listening to music. Or reading in our cottage with a cup of coffee in hand. And sometimes, it's playing with my dogs at the beach, running wild with the wind in my face.

14. What do i feel strongly about

I feel strongly about being an ARMY. Because its not that easy. Beacuse it's really gotten into me. Beacuse i love BTS, and it will insult me if anyone makes bad comments about them. They're my idol and i live looking at them as my inspiration.

15. What are my priorities in life

My number one priority is to find a job so that i could help my parents already. Number two is to suppprt my sister's study. Number three is to travel. Number four is to be a writer. And the list just goes on.

16. Five things to do less often

1. Being lazy

2. Not doing anything

3. Being pessimistic

4. Getting scared

5. Getting worried

17. What were my highs and lows this week?

My highs this week are when i passed that civil service exam and that 10-day vacation. About the exam, i never thought i could really pass it because i didn't even finished it. I lost hope already but miracles do happen. I got my miracle, thanks God. And about the vacation. Well, it's been a good one. I get to meet cousins and relatives i haven't seen before or in a long time.

And my lows this week is the realization that i may be losing my dreams one day because i grow up or fall in love. It makes me sad to even think about it.

18. Write a letter to my teenage self

Since i haven't been a teenager for a year now, I'm missing that self already. To my teenage self, you haven't been so reckless. Don't spend your time crying over guys and getting depressed about the me now. I'm truly fine. Worry about your self. Go out, enjoy, read your favorite books, write, and get inspired. And also, study well. But not hard. You shouldn't have a boyfriend, but it happens anyway. It's okay. Just don't get suffocated on love. Your feelings will fade anyway, trust me. Lmao 😂😂

Just love yourself more.

19. What do i need to be content

That i have what i need right now - a food to eat, a family to come home to, pets to cuddle, books to read, songs to listen, notebooks to write on, a cellphone to do stuffs i love, and many more.

20. Name three things i do well

1. Writing

2. Crafting

3. Reading

21. What are my biggest goals

To travel with my family. To meet BTS. To build a dream house. To publish even just one book. To know Japanese/Korean language. Above all that, TO BE HAPPY.

22. What do i love about myself

I love that i am continuously learning to love myself. That i am no longer in the impression of trying to chase some guy. That I'm not in love. That guys can no longer make a fool of me.

23. One way i would like to grow next year

My character. That's been a little bit off the track lately. I hate that i am not good to people. That anyone could annoy me so easily.

24. What would i be doing if money wasn't an object

To travel, perhaps. If by object means not an issue, then I'd probably be gone somewhere in the world and never coming back.

25. What's on my mind right now

The chinese movie called suddenly 17. It's about dreams dissappearing because the main character grow up. Or somewhere along the way, she gave it up for the man she love who only broke her heart after ten years of their relationship.

THAT MOVIE JUST MADE ME REALIZE THAT I WOULD NEVER EVER GIVE UP MY DREAMS FOR SOMEONE ELSE.

||05.31.19

[astoria00]

Salem and Cinder's connection is deeper than we think

So, in another post I talked about the possibility of Salem having shared some of her magic with Cinder to keep her alive. Now, I don't want to entirely debunk my other theory, but maybe what Salem shared with Cinder wasn't so much her magic, but a part of her aura/soul. And having a part of someone who is literally immortal attached to them...tends to keep one alive as well.

The show even offers us possible facts that could strengthen this theory. So for the sake of this argument I will go through them chronologically, starting by vol 3 episode 7, our very first Cinder flashback episode.

Besides Cinder's semblance (yes, I still attribute those explosions to her semblance), which resembles Salem's own signil eerily enough on certain occasions and which she could use way before obtaining the Fall Maiden's power, there is a short little dialogue I want to point out:

“The huntsman severed the connection before it was complete.

Yes...it's an emptiness. It burns...like hunger... I like it.

Yes...I will claim what is ours.

Thank you.“

That whole scene was, of course, a black screen scene and for a while I had just assumed Cinder would talk to Salem via a scroll or this seer grimm, but let's be real. Salem doesn't strike me as someone who owns a scroll and Cinder was definitely not talking to Watts or Tyrian here. A seer grimm might be possible, but...it depends on where Cinder was staying at that time and how many of these type of grimm Salem even has. So yes, it's still possible for this to be a one-sided phone call of sorts, but it could also be our first clue for Cinder's and Salem's connection. This whole conversation could have been telepathic...in a sense.

But let's look at another scene. In vol 3 episode 10, we see Emerald, Mercury and Cinder on the rooftop with the latter telling Mercury to focus on the Atleasian knights. When he states he will, Cinder adds this little tidbit.

“Good, continue the broadcast until the end.

(Ground/rooftop shaking)

And do not miss what happens next.“

This is of course referring to the giant grimm dragon breaking from the mountain. Now, Salem could have told Cinder about it and how to get it to emerge, but this shaking could have been anything really. Maybe one of the elephant grimm trampled over a house and it crashed into another, or an explosion caused a little quake in its aftermath. So Cinder knowing exactly what the shaking meant was pretty...specific and well timed.

But it gets even more interesting in vol 3 episode 12 when the grimm dragon first lands on Beacon tower:

“Shh...this is your home now.“

Now, first of all, the dragon seems to know exactly where it has to go. It could be beacuse Salem ordered it to...but why would it look so grimmly at Cinder then, when he first spots her? Why would Cinder need to calm it down? And more importantly, Cinder CAN calm it down! Sure, she could have just said it because she felt like it, or she thought it could help, but the dragon literally reacted to her words, its growl even softened somewhat. And who else have we seen talking to grimm like this? Salem!

So what does all of this have to do with Cinder and Salem's soulbound connection? Well...let's first try to find out HOW they talk to grimm.

In all honesty, I haven't seen other people in Remnant who attempted to talk to grimm, nor were they mentioned (well maybe Merlot did, but we're not counting him XD). And how would they even understand one? They are soulless creatures, but...they are drawn to negative emotions. Which means they have a 'higher' empathic sense of sorts. We also know they are somewhat intelligent. So maybe Salem is able to communicate with them via that sense. Yes, we have seen her directly talk to some of them, but talking helps us visualize or feel certain things, so this might have been for her own or Cinder's benefit. And we should also keep in mind that the seer grimm gave his report...via his clicking noises...so...the trick behind that 'language' could be interpreting certain feelings and pictures that are send via that sense.

We haven't seen Ozpin being able to do the same, so it could be an ability Salem aquired after jumping into the fountain of the god of darkness.

Now, if Cinder is being able to communicate with grimm as well and Salem is the only other being in Remnant who is known to have this ability, it certainly could allude that it got shared when Salem attached a part of her soul to Cinder.

Also, if we look further at her fight with Pyrrha, the grimm dragon tries to help her somewhat and not once did Cinder look surprised by that. Not when it suddwnly flew away, nor when it changed its course to speed up back at them to crash into the dome of the tower.

So why did I talk about how communication with a grimm might work? Because I believe Cinder and Salem to be able to communicate on the same level, via that empathic sense.

But let's take a look at vol 4 where we actually see both of them interacting.

We have vol 4 episode 3 where Salem gives Cinder a 'control your new arm' lesson. What exactly is she saying there again?

“Do you feel it?

Don't fight it, girl.

It can sense your trepidation.

You must make it dread you!“

Trepidation...alright... How do you know that, Salem? Cinder doesn't look frightened at that scene at all, a bit uncomfortable and probably in pain, but I wouldn't have said she was afraid. So not only 'it' was able to sense Cinder's trepidation, Salem could as well it seemed. And if we watch a bit longer we get the whole :

“Did you kill Ozpin?“

A question Cinder has to answer all by herself, even though she clearly can't really talk at the moment. And why was that important for Salem? Because Cinder literally wouldn't be able to lie to Salem's face if they're in fact connected like this and it would also explain why Salem looked so pleased after she gets her answer. She doesn't question it, she simply believes her when she says yes. Furthermore, there is this moment where Salem raises her voice and slams her hands on the table...but Cinder doesn't even flinch, as if she already felt something like this would happen.

Speaking about lies. In vol 4 episode 11 we have another instance of...interesting phrasing from Salem:

“Enough!

I thought you were the girl that wanted power.

Did you lie to me?

Then stop holding back!“

Stop holding back? Well, to me it certainly looked like Cinder gave it her all, no holding back, just being tired because she clearly pushed herself very hard, so I ask again...how did Salem know that? She would only be able to make that point if she either already witnessed Cinder handling her powers and knows she can do better, which didn't seem to be the case with how frustrated Cinder got at the end, or like with her trepidation in ep 3, Salem was just able to feel it. Something else that stood out to me in that scene was Cinder's reaction to Salem's: Did you lie to me? She flinches. Not when Salem says it's 'Enough', not when she throws Cinder's desire for power back at her, no, she flinches when she is accused of lying. And if we go with their connection theory...she literally wouldn't be able to pull that off, because Salem would know it immediately...somewhat like a lie detector. So Salem asking her this, was kinda a dig at her that she couldn't.

If we keep focusing on Cinder here when Tyrian comes back and begs for forgiveness, she only looks at him for maybe a split second, before her attention is solely on Salem again. And Cinder seems to look almost uneasy....lost of sorts? But why would she? Tyrian is the one getting focused on by Salem for now. He is the one in trouble. So could it be, that Cinder actually picks up on Salem's 'emotions' again, as she may have in ep 3? If they do have this bond, then it probably goes both ways. So Cinder might get some puzzling or worrisome readings from Salem in that scene, and we know from vol 6 just how much Salem can repress her anger...well until she doesn't, but still XD

Another scene that might strengthen this theory happens in vol 5 episode 2, when Lionheart tells his report to Salem. After she gives her orders to all of them and ends the 'call' she immediately looks over to Cinder, as if she knows right away that something is troubling her.

“You are free to speak your mind.“

She even sounds somewhat amused and as we have already seen, this isn't the first time Salem is awefully intuned to Cinder's feelings.

There are a few other small things that I have found throughout the series, but these are the most interesting ones I think, so let me talk about how I even got this idea in the first place and let's jump straight into vol 6 now.

After we got our first episode with Cinder it was clear that she had woken up a month after the attack at Haven. And she immediately seemed to know what to do. Sure, a lot of people were saying she couldn't very well go back to Salem empty handed, and although I'm not really agreeing with that, even if that is the truth, what stops Cinder to contact Hazel and get where Ruby and co. are from him? Or Emerald and Mercury? What stops her from reaching out to them? Her scroll seems to work just fine. Is she aware of Salem wanting her to “toil in her isolation“?

When we got episode 4, Salem is indeed aware of Cinder being alive. A lot of people seem to believe the reason for that is Cinder's grimm arm. Personally I don't agree with that. Yes, Salem is the master of all grimm and can control them, but firstly, we don't know how much at once and at what length she can do that. Secondly, she probably is not able to connect to a soulless creature, not even mentioning having the ability to keep tabs on them. 'Talking' and controlling them? Sure. But being outright able to feel when one of them evaporates? That would mean she would be able to keep tabs on all the grimm over the world...and I don't think that's the case.

So Salem attaching a part of her own aura/soul to the girl she definitely needs to survive against all odds and keep somewhat control over her, does sound plausible to me. It would certainly explain her leniency towards the Fall Maiden and why she is not even questioning her loyalty once. It is hard to betray someone who you're directly tied to after all.

But then again, that's just me theorizing again. I could be proven wrong next episode, but hey, analyzing these things is fun XD

[ispast-blog]

Last Promise - taekook!gang fanfiction

CHAPTER II

"U-uh guys what are you doing here?"Jimin nervous as a little kid asked and quickly put his shirt on.

"Shouldn't we be the one asking you that?" Taehyung went to the living room and stared at Seoul.

"It doesn't matter you can clearly see what happened between us and that's all it is." Yoongi replied to him, it sounded like a lie.

He said that what he and Jimin have between each other is just sex. Yoongi looked unbothered by that, emotionless just like always but Jimin looked kinda hurt, even if he tried to hide it.

He looked hurt and it showed all over his face. The way his big soft pink lips turned a little down by this, the way his eyes looked at that moment.

Jimin was hurt but Taehyung and Yoongi didin't care.

Taehyung knows that Namjoon cares beacuse he is a good man. He still couldn't say anything after that, he couldn't ask Jimin if he is okay, at least not now. They have business to discuss.

"Okay hyung and Jimin but that's not what we are here for, someone has done us dirty and is 100% planning on doing it again." Taehyung was the one to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Who,how,when and why didin't you just call me. Jesus we are living in 2019 not 70s." Yoongi seated himself on the kitchen counter while Jimin stayed quiet, probably still hurt by the remark earlier.

"We don't know who exactly at least not yet, but they messed with us. The new drugs which were worth $5 million won are stolen and the only thing we have left from that place is a shoe that Hoseok is working on. Four of our clubs in China destroyed. They killed our biggest costumers and the fun fact about this is that they all fucking did it at the same time, not a second late during midnight." The more Taehyung thought and talked about this the worse it gets.

He heard Jimin let out a quiet small suprised gasp, almost unnoticeable. Jimin is really pure and sweet, Taehyung wonders how can people like him and Hoseok end in this awful place.

"They what now? It sounds like a start to something, what do we do? No, what can me and Jimin do to help?" At that Jimin's head snapped at Yoongi probably suprised at man for mentioning him.

"You and Jimin have a flight to China, me and Taehyung wanted to go but we will stay in Seoul beacuse something might happen again and beacuse Taehyung has more work to do than us." Just when Namjoon said that he remembered he had many stupid meetings that he doesn't want to think about or even attend. "You will check the places where clubs used to be along with Taehyung's men, Bring anything to Hoseok it doesn't matter if it is suspicious or not just bring something so he could look into it. Yoongi you can try to hack the security cameras but i don't think that is possible. They destroyed the one in the hideout where drugs used to be." Jimin looked like he was listening to everything carefully while Yoongi was looking bored as always.

"Okay you two know what you have to do, I will send you a text about the details since you wouldn't remember and beacuse you yourself said this ain't no 70s" Taehyung turned around from watching the city and headed to the doors with Namjoon following him.

"Okay g'bye hyung Namjoon and Taehyung." Sweet Jimin said.

"Goodbye Jimin, we will talk later 'kay? Taehyung has a soft spot for Jimin how couldn't he have a soft spot for him. He made sure to remember to talk to him about Yoongi later when this mess calms down.

Typical Yoongi didin't even say goodbye to them but how could he blame him, they came here uninvited.

They had a last destination and that was Kim Seokjin. Taehyung can't stand the man for some reason but still he bears with him, him and Namjoon got into his car again. Namjoon started the drive with radio playing some kpop song Taehyung couldn't stand, it was horrible.

He looked out of the window, looking at a colourful aesthetic sky who he really liked and wasted another twenty minutes of his life.

The car and thank god the radio stopped, Namjoon got out of the car again waiting for him to join.

"You know Taehyung something is wrong with me, I can't tell if you either didin't want to ask or you didin't want to disturb me or just didin't care." Namjoon leaned against his car, preparing himself for a deep conversation they didin't have in a long time.

Taehyung knew that something was up with him, he should have felt bad for not asking, he didin't want to say anything during this mess." Yeah hyung I know something happened and I'm going to be honest with you I didin't want to ask, not at the moment when all of this is happening. Tell me, are you okay Joon?" They have been friends for a long time and Taehyung doesn't mind calling him nicknames even if he didin't use it for a long time now and Namjoon looked slightly taken away by that. He didin't care he was tired to be caring if he is acting soft or not.

"Okay, me and Jin aren't in a good place, not after his sister died and that happened months ago. He blames me for it even if it wasn't my fault but that shit gets me, we were close friends for years. I could rely on him anytime I wanted, I trusted him and now that we have to see him I don't know, I feel weird." How didin't he see that before, Taehyung gave himself a mental slap in the face for being so blind.

"I don't fucking know what to say hyung, it's yours to resolve that and I suck at giving someone an advice but trust me I appreciate you telling me this. We are here to discuss business so keep it professional." Taehyung was already heading to the elevator that lead to Seokjin's business building.

Namjoon followed and kept up with him

"Thank you and you know that damn well I will keep it professional." Namjoon smiled with that dimpled smile of his that makes boys and girls melt.

They didin't have to even ring the bell once when they saw Seokjin already opening the door. "Good thing Yoongi said that I'm getting a visit otherwise I wouldn't let you in. You know it is not that hard to text or call someone." Seokjin looked dead, wait he didin't, he might look like he got no sleep for ten years but he still glowed and looked gorgeous as always.

"Did he manage to tell you what happened?" Namjoon replied looking professional just like always. Taehyung didin't miss the fact that Namjoon probably felt weird beacuse he haven't seen the black haired man in months.

"Yes stolen drugs and destroyed clubs."

Seokjin opened the door more, giving them the sign to come in.

"Yes and two killed costumers, we obviously need your help." Taehyung simply said, looking around Jin's place nothing changed, it just felt colder it used to be warm in here.

"Of course you come around when you need help but it is my job so what do I have to do now?" Seokjin gave an attitude probably disliking the fact he has to be in the same room as Namjoon.

"We need you to go to China with Jimin and Yoongi but we also need you to look at club files from there, who visited in the last month and anything suspicious and the last thing we need you to look at the files of Seoul airplane travels of the last month focus on the ones from China to Seoul or from Seoul to China. And you will look up the cases of our ex dead costumers" Namjoon avoided as much eye contact as possible. Both of them were being silly and childish.

"Oh my god sounds so fun, can't wait!" The sarcasm was dripping trough Seokjin's mouth but he has to do his job and he himself knows he will do it. Nobody forced him to do this for a living, he wanted to do this himself.

Taehyung still can't stand Seokjin so he already said his goodbye's. "Bye Jin and have fun in China!" Sarcasm was dripping from his own mouth too.

Him and Namjoon finally could head home, after a such a long day and the fact that this will be a two hour drive or more makes him sick.

They drived in silence, comfortable one and thank god there was no radio today.

When he got in his own place it was dark already, the lights of the city under him shining bright. The dark and lights that haunt him, he already knows he ain't getting any sleep, he doesn't bother showering or changing his clotges he will do that tomorrow or in couple of hours. He decided to do his paperwork that was waiting for him all day long.

After what felt forever but still were just five hours his phone rang, He looked and saw who was calling him and it was Hoseok he picked up the phone immediately.

"Taehyung we found the owner of the shoe."

As soon as Hoseok said that, Taehyung was already on his feet putting his clothes on slowly, he already put his shoes on. How ironic, he answered to Hoseok "Who is it, do we know who is the person, what did it say?" He skipped right into questions.

"You and Namjoon better hurry up, it won't say a word and it is just quite." And the line went silent Hoseok sounded worried on the other side before he hung up.

Taehyung called Namjoon to inform him about the shoe person. "Namjoon meet me there,the shoes person is found, Hoseok is a genius. The person won't speak but we will make him or even her. I don't care how much it will take to speak but it will speak." Taehyung moved from his second floor to first one and was already heading to the elevator to take him to the another painful day.

He felt tired, as always.

"God damn okay got it, do you need me to pick you up?" Namjoon was rush talking in the moment, maybe scared beacuse it has been a long time since he tortured someone. On the other side he is Kim Namjoon so he wasn't scared more like nervousness was taking over his body. It was diffrent for Taehyung, he needs answers and he will get them and him being the sadist he is, he will enjoy causing someone pain.

It just the way he is,

he regrets it later,

that regret he has isn't enough to make him stop.

"No, I will drive myself for the first time in ten years." He almost thought Namjoon is going to argue over this because no way in hell is Taehyung capable of driving if he is tired, Namjoon was probably thinking he was going to fall asleep while driving he isn't that dumb and he is excited, he feels adrenaline pumping in his veins.

Taehyung unlocked his garage, revealing the ten expensive cars who he never knew the names of, he just got in one and started driving. It has been so long since Taehyung felt freedom, he felt good beacuse there was no one breathing down his neck, not even Namjoon was bothering him, that won't last long but he can still enjoy while he is at it.

The freedom, it will go away beacuse he has things to take care of, he has this shoe-person to take care of.

He almost forgot, the twenty minute long drive was taking his life away, he hates spending his life on such things. Driving in his car, not like he has an interesting life he just hates car rides. The street-lights looked aesthetic, they were poison but still effectivelybeautiful.

Taehyung loves aesthetic things as he mentioned before.

After admiring the night lights, darkness came as he turned to the empty rocky road. They can't have their hideout place in the city as obvious that is, they have to find a place the blue men wouldn't find, as like police can catch them Taehyung would love to see them try.

He arrived, at his destination. There was nothing special or unique here at this place, it is an abounded old building. A building where a lot of money worth drugs were stolen, a building where there stood a shoe and now a building where stood a person involved in this. He was last to join judging by the number of cars and by Namjoon standing in front of him, waiting for him as always. Namjoon is loyal to him and the feeling in mutual, he could always trust Namjoon and Namjoon could always trust him.

"Hoseok is inside, let's go" Namjoon didin't bother saying hello or hi, not that it mattered they are not that type of persons to greet after all they see each other almost everyday. The ground seemed moist and wet under his feet, the cause must be rain. The mud was disgusting and Taehyung hated every inch of it. They began walking opening the door, loud cracking noise filled the empty space. The door made a lot of noise and that is how everyone's eyes were on them, finally waiting for the ones who are always waited.

It was quiet, poor silence surrounding the cold and empty space.

Taehyung looked and looked at a boy, he looked at a owner of the shoe. Brown hair, big innocent eyes, small pink lips and those earings of his caught his attention. He looked younger than him or around his age, he also looked as tall as him and had a well built body. But Taehyung noticed that the boy doesn't look scared, he looks small even if he is not, he looks inoccent even if he probably is not. He was the one who has something to do with people who are making his reputation look bad, he helped and Taehyung doesn't care if he has to hurt him, he will. Those eyes and flushed cheeks won't get in a way, the only thing that might get in the way is that the unknown guy looks aesthetic.

Taehyung never met a person that gave him an aesthetic vibe, but now looking at him he had a long simple black shirt and basic jeans. What made him aesthetic was surely a lightning in this room but looking at other people he shined compared to them and Taehyung doesn't know what to do with that information. It was his face, it looked nice to look at, pleasing to look at, satisfying to look at.

Taehyung likes aesthetic things, but he will maybe have to destroy that aesthetic look of the boy's face, maybe even after he would look like a piece of art but just a fucked up one.

"What's your name?" Taehyung with slow steady steps moved closer to this rare type of person. He pulled his sleeves up and was ready to paint red if necessary. He observed the guy and he needed a name and he better give him one. The guy didin't answer no he didin't even look up at him, just ignored his existence and Taehyung hates that the most.

"Are you going to answer my question?" Taehyung walked around him, who is tied to the chair. He can read people and he can see that he isn't scared of Kim Taehyung, he is nervous and that is a big difference. Taehyung wants him to be scared of him, he wants to paint his face all red with his fist so the younger one could be scared. He was making that all easier and easier for him, he didin't even budge or look up from the dirty ground.

"Listen now and fucking look at me when I'm speaking." Taehyung took his chin in his hands, hard enough so it hurt and that made him look at Taehyung, the shoe owner still didin't look scared he looked more nervous and just a tiny bit mad as he saw him send him a small glare. Taehyung is intimidating indeed and he will do this right. In a even lower tone Taehyung continued with his empty threats. "If you don't tag along you will be dead for good and let me tell you no one will give a single fuck so don't be useless and answer the question!" The brown haired looked not taken back by that, he for sure knows who Taehyung is but isn't scared of him. But after looking at him for five more seconds he finally cracked something out.

"Jeon Jungkook as that file says that your friend has in his arms" he pointed at Hoseok and Taehyung really did see a picture of the boy in front of him and there must be many informations, Taehyung couldn't give less fucks about.

"Oh no no no, I already knew that but I just need answers from you, I need you to speak not the documents, that is boring don't you think?" Again they made their eyes connect. Jungkook's big,dark,inoccent eyes pierced trough his brown and confident ones. Eyes observed everything, Taehyung didin't dare to break eye contact. Waiting for Jungkook to start answering his questions. After what felt like seconds but were minutes.

Jungkook started to talk. Body calm while eyes not. Taehyung finds it funny how he can read him by his eyes and not body language, he can see trough them like open doors. "Fine, I will answer but only the questions I feel comfortable with. You obviously think I'm guilty, that is why everyone in this room is looking-observing me like some left over food for a wolf. Untie me and then I will talk, right now you are treating me like an animal." He spoke with that small lips and voice of his, again body calm, eyes wild. Hoseok wanted to refuse, not trusting the kid. "Untie him, he can't do any harm, not to me and not to you no need to overreact." As Taehyung's lips left those words out, Namjoon went to untie him from the chair. Taehyung observed the boy, him standing up, his black oversized shirt made him look even smaller, even if he was a tall man. Taehyung knows he felt small and that's why he looked small too. "Now I will talk, what do you want?" Taehyung then jumped right in, confidence filling the room just the way he walked closer and closer to the big dark orbs.

"What do we want? Huh what do you think we want Jungkook?" It was the first time he said his name out loud falling of his lips perfectly, he usually never remembers names of people who he doesn't care about or just doesn't want to know the name of them. "Tell us everything you know, It is your own fault after all that you can't keep your shoes on your own feet. What a weak move was that. Tell me now, what were you doing here last night at a building where my drugs used to be? You left a huge mark behind, a fucking shoe and that means you were in the rush. Again on the other hand it was really easy to find you, one day to be specific and it looks like you aren't under their protection. Now talk I have plenty of time a whole night and a day that is soon to come."

Jungkook's eyes and body language were giving him away, he wasn't scared he was uncomfortable and now looked smaller as ever. Taehyung knew he hit the sweet spot,quite proud of himself.

"I-i can't tell you everything, You are right about all of those things but you have to understand please." He looked small, Jungkook looked real small at this moment to the point he was stuttering but Taehyung needed answers, he needed the truth.

"Jungkook we are real fucked up at this moment and we need you to speak. Tell us, it will be easier this way" Taehyung will try it in a nice way and if he disobeys he will paint, he will paint his face red, he will paint his beautiful face red.

"Fine, I will tell you what I can." Jungkook looked confident again, he got himself back together. Taehyung knew it was all a mask, his biggest fears hidden behind it. He wasn't just nervous he was also scared for the first time. Taehyung knew it will be hard to get something out of him. He wants to do it in a nice way and not a hard one. Maybe he doesn't want to paint red, not on him, not today. Jungkook's eyes looked big, they looked scared. He can see everything trough his eyes. Yes, his voice wasn't stuttering anymore, his body didin't gave him away, his face calm. Those are the things you look at while trying to figure the person out, trying to see their emotions and feelings. You look at their body language, when they speak you observe it. It would give them away immediately, it gives most of the people away but not Jungkook. What gives him away are his eyes, it takes a certain someone to see what he is showing and feeling trough his eyes and Taehyung is that certain someone. He looked around to only see Hoseok and Namjoon look clueless. They are smart but they didin't notice Jungkook's eyes pleading for help and survival. Maybe he wanted to live but Taehyung has a feeling he isn't afraid of dying perhaps he is afraid of what comes after that just like Taehyung himself. He knows his place belongs to hell either way, everything is almost considered as a sin and he had done many and he keeps on doing them.

"Okay, Jungkook tell us what we need to know, tell us what is useful for us. You don't need to and you won't tell us anything personal. What you need to tell us is what happened here, last night. You need and you will help us, if you answer now we won't get the answers out of you in a hard way and by that I mean we won't hurt you." Taehyung looked in his eyes, he looked at his eyes deeper than the ocean itself and Jungkook's eyes gave it away, as always. He looks like a small child. Scared,nervous and small, so fucking small.

"I-i was here, ooh god I don't know how to tell you this. I was here because I had nowhere else to fucking go. I ran away but that doesn't concern you. It has nothing to do with this, s-so I ran away and I swear to god it had nothing to do with this. I didin't know this was a gang hideout place and then I saw them. I saw people dressed all in black, they saw me and I fucking panicked I didin't know what to do, how could I known? That's how I lost my shoe, I tried to escape and it worked. They had to go so that's why I was left alive. But I overheard their conversation." Everyone was patiently listening to him, for the next thing he was going to say. Jungkook then continued. "They said something as: This will be a huge move, we all strike at midnight and we can't mess this up i overhead them saying that they need to make boss happy, and if everything goes by plan that Kim Taehyung will reach his downfall. I-i also think they will attack you again somehow." It looked like Jungkook was done with his talking but Taehyung knew it was far from that, he knew that Namjoon and Hoseok will get every possible detail out of him. It is going to be a very long night.

Taehyung walked closer to Jungkook, having no intentions or maybe so. He wanted to be closer to to the boy so no maybe so he had an intention. "How old are you kiddo?" He looked at those big brown eyes which made him look like a child. "As I said before there is that file over there, where you can know everything you want to about me."