#be nice if we could stop being negative to each other overall
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Hello hello dear, here to give you an explanation.
The strange thing is: this fic appears to be related to the 'Saw' franchise? Which- unless I'm very out of the loop- Mr. Gaiman has nothing to do with. So this doesn't meet the typical criteria of breaking established boundaries, but I recommend not sending him anything like this anyway. It's still something he can't risk opening, regardless of the fandom it pertains to.
Regardless, here, have a bullet point list:
♤ Legal reasons:
If he looks at/reads any headcanons or fanfics, or even fan theories, he could be accused of taking the ideas and using them for himself. This could result in him being sued for taking the ideas. Avoiding fan works as a whole is the only safe way to circumvent this.
♡ Personal reasons:
Look. It's simple. Our minds are wild. They can go anywhere, anyplace, anytime. Now, while he has been fully supportive of the creative process that the worlds he's created have inspired, he does not want to know. Believe me. He doesn't. Do you really want to imagine your favourite character that you've created, or one that embodies some secret part of you, in any other way but the way you've imagined them? I would equate it to watching a movie rendition of a book you've really loved. Sometimes it's a beautiful interpretation, sometimes it's so horrifyingly unlike what you imagined that the character is ruined for you forever. Either way, not everyone wants to see that, preferring to leave it to the power of imagination (insert Gene Wilder reference here).
♧ Time: If you are looking to get yourself published, and are trying to share your work with him to that end, you're barking up the wrong tree, alas. He doesn't have the time to honour everyone's works and he is also not a publisher.
☆ He's asked us not to. Simple as that.
I'm probably missing something, but I hope I covered the basics.
I will say that I come across posts daily that threaten the readers, i.e. 'If you share this can theory/fic, etc. with Neil Gaiman you may wake to find your toes removed' or other equally creative forms of jovial (but serious) threats. It's nice to see the fandoms doing their part, where they can.
Lastly, the amount of kindness and acceptance we get from Mr. Gaiman about the ways we interpret his world is so abundant that I should hope we can take to heart that he is fully accepting of what is talked about and created; as long as he doesn't know about it. It's a simple boundary to impose and the least we can do is respect it.
O.P., I hope this is clear. You may not have known, so I just wanted to explain it. I don't want you to feel attacked by this, so I'm hoping it comes across as mattter-of-factly as possible. We don't need to be hurt any more than our mistakes already hurt us.
Thank you for listening.
P.S. Final note: including this link where he talks about the insanity of the legal world regarding this:
Neil Gaiman. I request that you read a piece of work my friend made. It's called Shock Value and you can find it on Ao3.
Use this link if you don't wanna search for it;
https://archiveofourown.org/works/52654369/chapters/133187092
Please don't send me links to fan fiction. People in the notes will explain why.
#stop sending neil gaiman things he can't read#be nice if we could stop being negative to each other overall#but little victories#this fandom is honestly amazing#we just have to work through some things#and be human to each other#neil gaiman#good omens#surprise showing from the Saw fandom
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i love ur blog fr… one of my least favorite things about the tarot community (not just kpop) is how some people alter or water down their readings (or just aren’t perceptive enough) so that their content is more positive and validating for consumability… and the people who choose to be honest and direct get ate up 😭 divination can be harsh. idk why people are here expecting validation or only positive things. most of these idols are not nice!!
if you want a romantic story and enjoy living in denial, go to ao3!! wattpad or something?? y’all are looking for fanfiction. there are soooo many writing blogs on this site.
and i also have soooo much beef with like, pop culture tarot readings on youtube and tiktok that are clearlyyyyyy not too good in quality, but people eat it up blindly because it tells them things that they like to hear and never anything critical. i have a theory about that being one of the reasons why people assume honest readers have bad intentions or are hating on people. i don’t think people realize just how common it is to read on someone and get the vibe that they’re shitty in some capacity, or not even having to rely on intuition and to be directly told that there is something off about someone. idols aren’t usually any better than the average person, and the average person usually has bad traits. period. some are worse than the average person.
also… i have a problem with how it’s seen as perfectly fine to share the positive traits we’re able to pick up on through tarot, but sharing the negatives is seen as invasive?? like girl either it’s all invasive or none of it lmaooo. you’re okay consuming content that makes you feel like you’d be attractive to someone or reading about what their personality is like, but it’s too much when that same person says that they’d potentially be a bigot or have issues with stuff like anger? that’s when it’s too much??? 😭😭
Thank you so much for stopping by to show love!! I really appreciate your perspective and agree with pretty much everything you’ve said. 🩷
People were shocked by @dreamofmetoday and l’s ideal type readings being so specific and descriptive and we didn’t get why until we tapped in with other peoples readings and realized most are just saying very vague things or just things that EVERYONE is looking for in a partner (for example, kind, sympathetic, loyal) or just things that make it easy to self-insert in general. I think the self-insert aspect is a main reason people put such an emphasis on only focusing on the positive.
I also get asks demanding I tell them how I get such specific and detailed answers when it comes to things like homophobia/race/misogyny whatever, and it’s like, that’s just how it works? Makes me wish more people would get into tarot themselves so they could see.
The “romantic love story” crossover stuff that you mentioned is why I think you’ll often come across readings, and even PACs, on here that are like a wattpad story. like you said, many readers know there’s a large audience for this. For example when it comes to PACs, 3 pile PACs are a very quick and easy way to get followers and likes, but overall don’t exert a lot of energy and limit the amount of people who can actually connect with the PAC but then each pile will be filled with nuance, details and specifics and the reader is able to just say, “take what resonates and leave what doesn’t” to get away with it. How is someone even supposed to know what truly resonates and what doesn’t for a future spouse reading anyway? Not to mention, how can these readers suddenly get so much detail for a random pac and then not in their other readings or personal readings? There’s just a lot of predatory behavior in the tarot community unfortunately (thank you to melody’s anon for helping us label this finally too), and in turn, it creates a huge misunderstanding of what to expect from readings when you know nothing about tarot.
Not saying all 3 pile PACs are bad of course btw, because that would be ridiculous. There are of course situations where the 3 pile format makes sense, but a lot of them on here are just baiting.
In regards to positives being welcomed with open arms and negatives being considered invasive, it’s literally just nonsensical and honestly, a little weird (often the result of fetishization or idolization etc. so to say this under the pretense of high morals is odd… to say the least). I’ve seen people say things like “who are readers to decide what’s a negative?” when that’s literally not the case, it’s not a case of the reader “deciding” anything, I’m literally asking specifically about the negative traits. It makes me wonder what questions other readers are actually asking in the first place to even come to the conclusion that we would assigning these traits ourselves. Or the argument that “humans are multifaceted so we shouldn’t assign them blah blah blah” like… yeah… duh they’re multifaceted, which is why there’s literally a positives section? It just seems like they reach for excuses to defend their main point that the negatives of these men’s personalities just shouldn’t be acknowledged. It almost makes me feel like some people make these blogs to even improve their idols overall image on a smaller scale or have more control of the perception of it.
I really LOVE how you said “it’s either all invasive or none of it is” because that’s something Melody and I talk about together all the time. Their love lives and “kinks” aren’t invasive topics, but everything that could ruin someone’s fantasy about an idol is. In the end, you’re only allowed to post readings that let you daydream about being their best friend, boyfriend or girlfriend with no complications or obstacles I guess lol. Thanks again for sending this ask! It was really cool to unpack this and see that there’s a reader/follower on the same page. 🩷
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Just Saw Deadpool and Wolverine
So I guess I'll start with the negatives:
I don't know if it was because I saw it with my grandma, or if I just wasn't in the mood, but the sex jokes tired me out quickly, which is weird considering stuff I like, such as Viziepop cartoons. It felt like there were way more of them, and some of them, like the one with Wade negotiating how he's going to be pegged, went on a little long. I do admit that part of it could just be that my state of mind won't allow me to enjoy necrophilia jokes.
I feel like Wade didn't really learn anything. Like, we see a memory of Venessa telling him off for being irresponsible and only being as big as himself, but in the end, he's still being selfish. He pushes Wolverine out of the room even though he tells Wade he has nothing to go back to and after that he says it's for the good of everyone. This is self-pity. Even now, he's still mostly thinking about himself. It makes the scene where it looks like he and Venessa might make amends feel silly, which kind of leads into my next point.
It's 2024, I'm 20 and officially out of my teen years. It's the future and I'm too old for this shit. What shit you might ask? Pseudo-gay relationships. If you're going to be gay, go all the way with it. Stop playing Wade's pansexuality as a joke. Just have him and Logan hate fuck, dude. This is already an R-rated movie, so nobody gets to say you're grooming their snot-nosed brats with it.
So what Did I enjoy?:
I can definitely see some people feeling as though it made the movie feel shallow, but I do like the metanarrative with Deadpool being the MCU's final saving grace. I'm sick of Marvel movies dude, and you probably are too. I haven't been excited about a Marvel film since Endgame, Maybe Shang-Chi, but honestly, I don't know if I would've gone to see that on my own.
Even if I don't think it holds any water in the long run, it's nice to see Marvel acknowledge its criticisms and the problems it's created, and I appreciate the end credits not teasing anything.
Also, saying all this, no one is above nostalgia. I lost my shit when I saw Blade. Okay? This movie has not made me excited for Marvel again, but I will absolutely come to the theater if/when? they release a Blade movie. Although, the way that scene was played, it kind of seemed like that wasn't going to happen...
As irritated as I was with the way Wade and Logan's relationship was handled, I still enjoyed it overall. The thing characters do when they sacrifice themselves for each other and won't let the other one go out on their own? I love that shit, I'm a sucker for it.
Also, Dogpool and Peter. That's it.
I still prefer the 2nd movie overall, but I suppose this is a worthy sequel. I'll give it a solid 7/10
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Oh, oh! 😧/📓/🃏 for Angsty John!
😧 What are you worried about with this fic?
So, I started writing this because I've never really written true angst, and I was in a negative headspace bc I was tired and so I wanted to try it. And so I just sat down, and started writing it and as a result, I feel like I'm being mean and I'm not used to it, and it did help, so then I drew it back a little bit. So mostly, at this point I'm worried that it's a bit of an 'easy' fix, I say as if I don't have like 20k moreish to write. Maybe more.
And, it deals with John post canon and what I consider to be him in a depression, but its not something I have experience with and so that's always complicated. Because I know its not a one and done fix, and so I want to make sure that comes across that john might be better, but it's something he's always going to have to watch out for.
📓 Share an out-of-context sentence or fragment from your fic notes
'It was hard to communicate with your wife when you wanted your best friend.'
🃏 Wildcard, dealer's choice: share a snippet, a thought, a concern, a feeling, anything you like!
So, one thing I also wanted to address in this fic was how poorly I think Jennifer was handled in season 5, especially when she turned into nothing more than a trophy, and I am kinda loving her in this, shes coming into her own and a lot sassier and settled. And I like it? Even if a lot of it happens in the background.
And while, overall this story is about John, it's also about everyone else because they all make the decision to save John and just go when he's in trouble. And this bit is from a moment between Rodney and Jennifer as they're getting ready to save John and I just really really like it.
Also, Jennifer and John end up as super bitchy friends to each other and its fine.
Jennifer sighed. “I,” she stopped and shook her head. “Listen. When we were doing all of those dinners and going out, you were so nice, and I was nice as well because we had to be to all of those people, but then as soon as we were beamed back you started yelling at people—”
“—I’m not going to yell at you,” Rodney interrupted.
Jennifer held up a hand, stopping him from talking. “I know, and I appreciate that. I do. But it’s not that you were yelling it’s that suddenly you seemed more like you than you had been.”
Rodney opened his mouth, wanting to argue against the point but Jennifer stopped him with a look he had never seen before outside of the moments when people had been injured and she had been in her element. Directing everything around her so people got the treatment as quickly as they could.
“And the thing is, I want that for me,” Jennifer said, crossing her arms in front of her chest and lifting her chin. “I…look. You’ve met my Dad. He’s got some old-fashioned ideas about everything.”
Rodney nodded slowly, remembering the interrogation her Dad had given him when he had met the man for the first time. If Rodney hadn’t spent the better part of his life working for General’s he would’ve caved under the man’s direct, no-nonsense questions. “What does that have to do…?”
Jennifer shook her head. “I don’t want to get married. I don’t want to give up my career to become a stay-at-home Mom.”
Rodney frowned. “I’d never ask you to do that.”
That got Jennifer to smile and step closer, resting a hand on Rodney’s arm. “I know, and it’s one of the things I love about you. But the problem is I want to focus on my job, especially if I get to keep it on Atlantis. And I want to focus on my research because I really think I have a shot at helping you guys defeat the wraith. I want to do the things that I love, and it’s not fair to either of us to wait around and see if you like the version of me that I also like.”
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hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, clown anon here after a long time of not talking :0) how do you feel with this season? what do you think of it? i just watched derision and hmmmm i'm having mixed feelings about how things are developing
hiiiii clown anon omg it’s been so long!!!!! How are you doing ??
I have mixed feelings too to be honest! I reaaally loved it up till Elation (episode 9 I think? I’m forgetting all the names), but after I’m feeling a bit confused on a few things that are leaving me hungry for more. But I’ve yet to see all the episodes so maybe some stuff are gonna make more sense later
(I’m gonna put the rest undercut cause I don’t want to be too negative for those who don’t care about that, especially because I’m still enjoying watching very much, but I’m still underwhelmed about a few things)
The interactions are super cute and I’m rooting for them so I still love it, but while I had the feeling the lovesquare sides were merging together as expecting till Elation, I feel like the writers are splitting the sides more now if it makes sense? Like Ladynoir and Adrinette are existing more on their own than as a whole right now. Which, I’ve said enough times that I always expected / hoped for them to date post-reveal instead of pre-reveal, so I was already super disappointed by that. Because to me the whole idea with the lovesquare was for them to discover each other fully and all, having all these conflicts with the identities while right now they’re not really…playing much into anything (apart from sending Luka to Brazil lol) between the 2 of them (thought this might change in later episodes & we might not have had the time to see it yet properly)
I feel like a lot of the Adrinette we see now should have developed as friendship last season, especially if they wanted to go with the pre-reveal dating part. I feel like they’ve started some plots only for them to fall short or be dismissed easily (Marinette supposedly falling in love for Chat Noir is completely brushed aside despite the built-up, as if potentially being akumatised and getting back to reason could erase romantic feelings easily which is…weird. Her refusal of getting close to Adrien at the start of the season because of her trauma from loosing the miraculous, while understandably not being a problem anymore in Kwami’s choice since she’s free of her Ladybug responsability, isn’t being addressed anymore when she get it back (unless I’m misremembering which is possible cause I watched the episodes only once while I was traveling dhfhjfd). Then today’s episode explained lots of her struggles with confession, which is great and I really liked that we got all these insights, but it comes a bit late imo - we’ve thought for so long Marinette was scared of rejection, but turns out it’s not exactly quite just that. Then for the whole show they’re telling us how important secret identities are, then the Luka plot with him knowing is just brushed off like it’s nothing and honestly didn’t really add anything to the plot and all, etc etc.& I won’t talk about Kwami’s choice because apart from the Adrinette in the episodes & the wish getting stopped by them as civilians, the rest wasn’t it hahaha)
They’re also now suddenly focusing a lot on side-characters (Zoé???? when again we could have gotten more Nino development instead but anyway), that are taking a lot of the intrigue leave Adrien more in the background than some side-char, or taking the place for some other plots that could have felt less rushed. Not that it’s bad to develop side-characters, but ML hasn’t been great at it so it comes off as them waking up like ‘oh shoot we gotta develop these guys’ on the late.
Anyways I’ve rambled enough as it is hahaha, overall I’m still laughing a lot and having a great time, and it’s nice to see them getting closer and I love that 🥺 and I hope the next episodes will change my mind on a few things, but I can’t say I’m entirely satisfied with the way the lovesquare plot is unfolding. It’s not bad, it’s nice and I enjoy it, but a part of me will always mourn the loss of potential. Things would have been a lot more meaningful if they had dated after the reveal imo but oh well 😅
I don’t know if your mixed feelings were on the same points as me or not clown anon, but here are some of mine!
#ask#clown anon#yeah i opened my askbox again a month or so ago#i thought i should be fine & not risk getting spoilers or leaks in it ahha#especially because i’ve been really quiet lately#ml spoilers#migration spoilers#migration#derision#derision spoilers
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Send 💕 and the mun will say something nice about you, the mun — for me, maybe? 🥺
POSITIVITY MEME!!
NO MAYBES, JUST OF COURSE!! I could gush about you all day, Ladybug!!
I have so many positive thoughts about you, like I can't even think of a negative if I wanted to. Thing is, you're a very good and chill person to be around here with! Not only that, but your muses are always top notch and your writing backs it up perfectly! I always feel like I'm interacting with the actual canon characters! Even your headcanons complete them amazingly! I love your perspectives and thoughts on each character and I wish I could throw you into any fandom 'cause you'd do justice to any character you grew interested in! I can't stress this enough, but being obsessed with the Boys lately and having you around to write about it has helped me so much! Talking about it with you too is so much fun and I'm glad you saw the same potential I did! I'm just as obsessed!
But not only that, your value lies in just who you are as a person. You're considerate, kind, inviting, patient, overall just a delight to be around with. I know I'm not the best rp partner or however you'd call it, but you truly make me feel like I'm special and that I belong here. If it weren't for you, I bet I wouldn't have lasted as long here if at all. I had been so caught up in wanting so many followers and interactions with different people before, that I'd get depressed when I found out my inconsistency pulled people away. You made me realize that I don't need many interactions, even just one good one is enough to be happy and feel fulfilled writing. I always say it, but joining The Quarry rp scene caused me to meet you and I am so fucking happy I joined, because of that. You inspire me not just in rp but out of it. You help me have fun, you spark my creativity with each headcanon, comment, meme, moodboard, song, everything you share, cause I can see you pour your heart and soul into this and you don't need big engagement to love your muses and give your all in every writing.
You do that with anyone, too! You're always willing to give it your all towards other rp partners or rather every rp partner you have! It's amazing and I've seen some awesome interactions around, I wish more people would notice how amazing you are! I know I said lots of engagement is not necessary, but damn, with your talent, I would expect millions of people flocking over you, haha! I won't stop screaming about you, Ladybug! Honestly, you mean a lot to me. You've put me in a positive headspace when it comes to writing here and interacting, you've helped me a whole lot. It's been a year of having you and I am just so delighted. Thank you for not giving up on me despite my shortcomings, I'll keep thanking you immensely for that. I hope this can last for way longer, because I wouldn't want to lose such an amazing friend. And OF COURSE I CONSIDER YOU A HUGE FRIEND OF MINE! Even if we only interact here, you mean a lot to me and I'd love to know you more as time goes by! Love you so very much, Ladybug, hope you never forget that! I'd love to say much more but I'll keep it here, for now! You are great, always and I love you, my beloved, my sacrosanct main!
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Game balance is a pretty common topic and I think about it too sometimes. In the context of single-player games, specifically.
long post.
When it comes to multi-player versus games, things should remain balanced. They won't be, that's how we always end up with all the possible options a player can pick in different tiers, but there should be some striving towards not creating gross disparities.
However, in games where we don't have 2+ humans facing off against each other, I think it's absolutely fine to pretty much throw it out the window. There's really no harm in it and it opens up pathways for creativity to flow. Some things can be very difficult to bring in line with other options, so if a dev is afraid of having an unbalanced option, they might end up discarding something that could've been really interesting.
To stop with vague words, I'll go to my go-to series: Touhou.
In the Touhou games there is hardly a game where you don't have one or two character or shot options that stand out as being noticeably stronger or weaker than the rest.
Sanae in Ten Desires just sucks. Her shot deals no damage and is awkward to get the most out of in boss fights.
Meanwhile Marisa B in Double Dealing Character might just be the most powerful shottype in the series.
There are many such cases, I could keep listing them. Marisa in UFO is kinda terrible overall: A-type has a bad bomb for that game (Master Spark kills your movement and instantly annihilates UFOs, making it ill-suited for playing into the game's gimmick) while B-type has the worst shot (nice idea, but deals negative damage) but a good bomb. She just can't win in that game.
To stick with UFO for a moment longer, Sanae A's homing snakes have a tendency to miss if you make them travel too far. (They still do that even in later games, but only in very specific situations. In UFO it happens kind of a lot.)
Subterranean Animism is also full of off-beat shots. They're all on Marisa, too. Marisa A(lice) has a focused shot when unfocused and a spread shot when focused. Naturally, this is deliberate and I like it, but it is undeniably awkward to use. She's also the only one who loses more Power on death when full than she drops, because Alice gives her 8 Options instead of 4, but only increases Power gains by half or two thirds, I don't exactly remember, so you're always in the hole so to speak. Marisa B(atchouli) has like two useful formations - Fire and Water. Wood is a super-spreadshot that has a 90° dead zone in the front, Metal shoots to the right and left and Earth shoots behind you.
Marisa C(appa) has good damage but no spread (pretty normal for Marisa), but it has a bomb that deals 1 damage. It can't kill any enemy. C sucks for the main game and is godlike in Extra.
On that note, all of Marisa's bombs just suck ass in some way. Alice's and Patchouli's need you to go into melee range. Alice's does have long-range damage, but it's not much and Patchouli's is just a melee blast. Nitori's is a barrier. Barriers are nice, we know that from PCB, but between that and a narrow forward shot, Marisa C struggles to generate initiative during stage portions. You don't have a button that just handles things.
However, what do all of these wonky, sometimes underpowered shottypes in common? They're fun to use. I love messing around with Marisa B's formations, finding the optimal spots to use them. Can you clear the whole game with just Fire and Water formations, treating them as your Focus and NoFocus shots? Yes. But there is room to master it.
While I don't love to play UFO, I think Marisa B might be my favourite shot-type because it's so bad. It feels good to make it work.
Now on the other end of the spectrum there's DDC's Marisa B who is incredibly plain and breaks the game in two. It's just Missile Marisa and her bomb is some dinky circle that slowly travels upwards, deals mediocre damage and has invincibility time that's less than half of its total duration.
It also converts any bullets it erases into P-items. You can generate more resources with this bomb than it uses. It gets stronger the higher you set the difficulty. Marisa B scales with the difficulty. There is no other shottype in the series that does this. Okay, SA Reimu B also does this, but her bomb just converts enemy bullets into friend bullets so it's not anywhere near game breaking.
So what am I getting at here? The games would be worse if every shottype was "balanced", however nebulous the idea of that may be.
If every shot-type had to not suck, we wouldn't have gotten SA Marisa C, which is pretty annoying to use for 90% of the main game. We probably wouldn't have gotten a third of Mountain of Faith's shot-types or TD Sanae either. (nobody seriously plays MoF Reimu C for some notion of that being the most powerful shot-type in that game. It's a close-range type attack that you have to be insane to get the most out of. Just pick Marisa C like everyone else who's too cool to play normal shots.)
I like the wacky stuff. I want more Touhou games with weird shots like we had in MoF, SA, UFO and DDC. I want another Cold Inferno, I want Marisa's piercing lasers back, I want another SA Marisa A who has a focused unfocused shot for really no reason at all. Give me jank. Give me another shot-type that wasn't thought through to the end and accidentally breaks the game in the best way possible. Or just another MoF Marisa B.
Honestly, Mountain of Faith's Marisa B is a great example of where imbalance can hit a peak, because due to a glitch it deals so much damage that until like Stage 6 it clears all spellcards and nonspells so fast that bullets won't even reach you. There's no sense in it at all, but it is funny. It's funny! You can avoid this glitch from triggering; Its activation is somewhat specific. It's not something I want all the time, because that one just ruins the game, but is there any harm in it? No! Nobody is harmed by it. I get to laugh at the glitchy laser and have a good time.
Similarly nobody is harmed by someone having an easier time clearing DDC because they picked Marisa B and I'm not harmed from struggling through UFO on that Marisa B.
The bottomline here is that people shouldn't worry about whether or not a game is "balanced", so long as there's no element where players can abuse imbalanced elements against other players directly. And even then, fighting games have always and still have joke characters that are way weaker than the rest of the cast and it's fine. People love the challenge these things bring with them. They love to pick some crusty guy in a fighting game who has no movement, no options, bad frames or whatever and get the most out of it. It feels good to prevail from a disadvantaged position.
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Love Reading 🫀- August 2023 - Libra
Singles:
Overall energy: 4 Cups
How you will meet: The Star
How they will treat you: Knight of Pentacles rev
Long-term Potential: 4 Wands
Oracle: Decide Your Vibe
You’re probably going to give up on this person before you finally realize it’s the right one. You’re the problem! Maybe. Probably. This is the person of your dreams, but you don’t necessarily trust it, or skip over them a few times like “nah”. There could be one date or interaction where sparks are flying everywhere, but nothing after, it’s like a dead stop. The reason it never goes anywhere is because of (I assume you) getting in your head, assuming the worst, making up reasons why they hate you or aren’t into you, they have someone else, projecting all of these fears and worst case scenarios. But, once someone does decide to speak up, the outcome is beautiful. A stable relationship, possibly living together, releasing all of these fears and worries and realizing it was all your mind playing tricks on you. 2 Cups & 10 Cups, it’s liable to shock the hell out of you, they’re the one 💖
Messages -
Their side:
- I just don’t know what to say.
- Really Tall
Your side:
- Quietly observing 👀
- Younger man/woman
- Meant to Be ❤️
Signs you may be dealing with:
Cancer, Aquarius, Pisces, Virgo, Scorpio & Gemini
Couples:
Overall energy: 9 Swords
Current: 3 Wands
Challenge: Judgement
How they feel about you: 9 Pentacles
How you feel about them: Knight of Swords
Outcome: 4 Cups rev & The Hierophant
You two see the absolute worst in each other, going by the oracles. This is over with, you both know it, but you also both wait for each other to make it better, be romantic and have another beginning, and you’re both terrified of the other person having other options, cheating in the connection, being happy with other people. You both hold that back, and any hurt or heartbreak for the sake of pride and wearing a brave face with each other. Proving a point. Not being vulnerable or “weak”.
They see you as acting single, partying it up with your friends, maybe going out on dates, and it makes them sad, 5 Cups. Deeply sad, focused on what’s lost and feeling extremely negative towards your lack of give a damn. You see them as verbally cutting and harsh towards you, maybe biting your head off, and leaving this behind altogether…maybe literally leaving. Moving somewhere else, or traveling away from you for awhile to get their head on straight. Outcome for mid Sept, a chance is lost to fix the connection, or express any vulnerabilities/feelings with each other due to the actions you both are taking against the other, and your very negative views of each other, though there are deep feelings, I’m also getting there is “no more nice” here. It’s just over. You or they may also decide to move on & commit to someone else very quickly, or take some drastic action, ending this cycle between you for good. For someone, it is possible that “counseling” is introduced as an option to help a relationship, but that won’t be for everyone.
Messages -
Their side:
- Lighter skin tone
- I want the kids, the dogs, the fence, everything!
Your side:
- You fascinate me.
- Sibling Drama
- We don’t want the same things.
Oracles - Tell that little douchebag voice to pipe down.
Their side:
Don’t let anyone control you spiritually or in any other way. You are the master of your chart.
Avoid being pulled in by people who use you and out you down.
Your side: Even if dark-souled entities are in your own family, know that you can divorce yourself from them.
Signs you may be dealing with:
Gemini, Scorpio, Virgo, Pisces, Cancer & Taurus
#Libra tarot reading#love reading#singles reading#couples reading#august 2023#relationship tarot#Libra#tarot
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21.
I dated Eli for about a year and a half. It was fun for a college relationship. He was deeply insecure about a lot of things (he was over 21 years old without a driver’s license because his mom was a crazy neurotic hellbent on keeping him at home forever because she couldn’t stand the thought of not being needed by her kid anymore) and though I tried to be the best girlfriend, I was fucked up and got a lot of things wrong, too. Still, it was good until he made a sorry attempt at a sexual joke (“I wish you’d grab your ankles more!”) and out he went. This abrupt goodbye happened in July of 2015 and I never regretted it. He thought he’d bagged a good thing and I felt I could do much better.
What followed was a sloppy summer fling and then a tightening of my physical boundaries. Once Senior year had begun, I entered the online dating sphere, went on a few dates, got ghosted by a guy I really liked who ended up getting back together with his ex (whom he of course swore up and down to me was crazy and he was beyond over her), and by March of 2016 had given up on boys. The ones around my age all seemed to be immature, uninteresting, or have psychological problems.
Then, serendipitously, I met the man I would later marry at a psychology conference in New York.
From the very start, he was nothing like David. When we first saw each other in that huge conference room full of people, he looked at me and really seemed to see me, not just my physical form but whatever me was on the inside, too. We talked for four hours about music, movies, books, religion. I got his phone number and within a week, we decided to give dating a shot.
Whatever I had thought was love before was a pitiful shell of what I felt for Joseph. It was heady and almost overwhelming in its power. Being so deeply in love with someone is like being possessed or tripping on acid 24/7. I was overcome. It felt so good to connect with someone so deeply, so passionately. We told each other we were not only on the same page, but the same letter of the same word on so many things. Joseph told me I was the female permutation of his soul. We were so in sync and in harmony it was hard to believe it was real.
We married in September of 2017, a year and a half after meeting. Joseph was and is so incredibly amazing as a life partner; he loves me for everything I am. He appreciates my body, sure, but he also loves that I’m a writer, a fellow gamer, a Lord of the Rings fan, a lover of music. He knows my ambitions, interests, desires, and fears almost as intimately as his own. He takes care of me like I never imagined a spouse could. He loves me for me, all of me, not just the fleshy vessel I happen to occupy and what it might be able to do for him.
We do have phenomenal sex, though, in case you’re wondering. I’ve never been eaten out and overall pleasured so much in my entire life.
The seeds David sowed did not stop growing after Joseph entered my life. I never had the desire to reach out to him again, but he still haunted me. On paper, my life was fantastic. Great marriage, stable full time job, owned a house, was physically the fittest I’d ever been, had a couple books published and worked on writing nearly every day. But in my head, I was never good enough. There were always things wrong. I felt attacked by my own thoughts, startled by their harsh negativity. My body, though in the best shape ever, was still nowhere near perfect.
Alcohol became easier to acquire, my drinking easier to hide. Whenever I felt bad, which was more often than not, I drank. It got bad enough that I was drinking at my full time job just to get through the day. Just to cope with living inside my head. It was not a nice place to live. I was not kind to myself. I was not happy, and I couldn’t even articulate why.
It was not until 2020, 3 years into my perfect marriage with alcohol abuse and depressive thought loops in full swing, that it occurred to me David had never been in our relationship for love. That I was a victim of his abuse, something very far from a consenting party.
This was 7 years after I ended it.
10/12/2020
A letter to my oppressor.
I loved you
(Or whatever it is a 15-year-old girl thinks is love).
I trusted you.
I sacrificed sleep
And friends
And time for you.
And you abused my naivete with relish
For years – 4 to be exact –
And all that time I never knew
I was dressed as the victim in this play.
Did you really love me? Or was that just a leverage word
To pry my top off?
To peel open my legs?
I never questioned it, but now
7 years later,
A moment of bitter clarity.
After everything you took from me
I want nothing
Except the apology you owe
Not only me
But my family, then and now.
You tricked me. Ruined me.
Fucked me in more ways
Than one.
And all I want now
is to know –
Are you sorry?
(I never heard you say it.)
Did you know what you were doing
All along? Preying on innocence
In a time of vulnerable isolation?
Spinning stories about a future together
To a gullible girl with stars in her eyes?
From the bottom of your soul,
Trembling at the judgmental feet
Of Old Testament God,
Are you sorry?
Do you think that’s enough to save you
From the gates of Hell?
It was not until now, 2022, 9 years after I cut ties, 24 weeks pregnant with mine and my loving husband's first child, a daughter, did it dawn on me that David had abused me. Taken full advantage of me and abused me. Not by force but coercion and pressure. With “I love yous” and smiley emojis and promises of marriage. Yes, I was a precocious teen, a “wise for her age” fifteen-year-old girl. And it is true I agreed to everything he asked me to do. But he never really had my consent.
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“the things you do for charity”
Pairing: kenma x gn!reader Genre: fluff Summary: kenma's always been a private person, but it was getting increasingly harder to keep his partner off his streams while you live together; so, he decided to join his two loves together for a 24-hour charity stream extravaganza. Word Count: 3,408 Warnings: some swearing, i suppose there are some spoilers from the manga about adult kenma's job? A/N: i'd give my left tit to play some minecraft or mario kart with kenma tbh -Luna
Kenma's career as a popular streamer was one of the many facets of him that shocked you when you’d started dating two years ago. The two of you had first met in an Animal Crossing discord for your city meant for trading and making friends.
After you had gone over to his island to adopt Raymond from him, he let you keep all of your Nook Mile Tickets with the stipulation that you kept in contact with him to "give him updates" about how the cat villager was doing in his new home. His dorky way of trying to flirt with you was what made you pursue him in the first place, and somehow it had led to a very fulfilling relationship.
It was revealed early on that he was a streamer, but he never expanded on it regarding the actual numbers. Curiosity got the best of you one night, and you decided to google him. Besides also learning that he was a YouTuber, you found yourself in awe at the numbers he managed to accumulate across all of his social media.
And if that wasn’t enough, he was also apparently the CEO of his own business.
Once you moved in together around the one-year mark of your relationship, you got to properly witness the amount of work put into streaming and maintaining a social media presence. This also meant that you got to read the wild comments that were left on all of his platforms���and see the occasional surprise nude picture whenever he opened up his DMs around you.
Because of this, Kenma sat you down to have a conversation about your potential appearance on his social media. You both decided by the end of it that his audience would get to know that he was in a committed relationship, but you agreed it would be best to not show your face or reveal any identifying information of yours.
It had been a year since having that conversation, and you’d both stuck to the agreement closely. The most his audience had ever seen of you was your hand whenever you refilled his water bottle for him.
Of course, it was hard sometimes, especially when you had to remain extra quiet around the house and refrain from yelling out a 'baaaabe' whenever you needed something from him, but since he had his own soundproof office, it lessened the room for any accidental error.
Overall, you were content with never showing your face to his audience for the rest of his career. You knew how nasty the internet could get because of their parasocial relationships with influencers and streamers alike, especially when they discovered those influencers and streamers had a partner who wasn't them, even if they knew they never had a chance. You weren't sure your skin was thick enough to deal with rabid angry stans.
Which is why it was so shocking when Kenma decided one day to nix the agreement.
You were in your shared bedroom answering some emails when he came in. He was dressed in a baggy hoodie, sweats, and tied-up hair; his typical look for a stream.
After some time, you noticed that he was still standing in the doorway, not saying anything. When you glanced up at him, you found him awkwardly toying with the strands of hair that had fallen out of his bun, looking down at the ground like he was just waiting for you to notice him.
"Is there something you need, baby?" you asked. "You're just standing there all adorably shy."
"Yeah, so, um, I'm going to be doing a 24-hour stream this weekend to raise money for charity."
"Oh, really? Cool! I guess that means I'll be going to bed alone that night," you joked.
"Yeah, I guess. Um..." He started before scrunching up his face like he was uncomfortable with what he planned to say next.
"What is it? Do you need me to stock up on snacks and energy drinks? Just send me a list. I can pick them up tomorrow."
"No, that's not it. I was thinking of making a stretch goal be you coming on stream so we can play Minecraft or Mario Kart or something...I mean, I totally understand if you don't feel comfortable. I could always replace it with something else. I know they've been wanting to see me dye my hair a bright color and dress up like an e-boy, so--"
"Really!?" you nearly yelled.
"What? That they want me to dress like an e-boy? Yeah, Kuroo said it would–"
"No, I mean..." You tried to fight the confused expression that was growing on your face, but your squinted eyes gave you away. "You really want me on your stream? Like face and all?"
"....Yeah, I really want to be able to share this with you. But don't feel like you have to do it just to make me happy."
It was a large ask when looking at the full picture. Kenma had his fair share of fans and "stans" who lacked boundaries, as seen from a select few who visited your home several times this year, or the handful that found you on social media already just from seeing a glimpse of your college ring on the hand wrapped around Kenma's water bottle.
There could be a chance you could receive direct hate on your social media just because you were a person who dated a popular streamer. You would then be in the public eye with little privacy and have a magnifying glass on all of your actions and words. Anything you did would then reflect on Kenma.
What if you messed something up and then Kenma lost viewers? Would they try to cancel you or him for it?
You backed away from all the negative thoughts before you could spiral and looked at the metaphorical 'pro' column.
If you agreed to appear on his stream, you would no longer have to sneak around your house in fear of being heard or showing up in his face cam. You both wouldn't have to feel guilty playing games off-camera with each other because you knew Kenma could be streaming it instead.
And who knew? Maybe his fans would like you. You had to admit, it would be a nice ego boost knowing that you were accepted by so many people.
And, most importantly: you could physically ask him in person what he wanted for dinner instead of texting him and waiting an hour for a break so he could respond, while you sat in the next room, starving, stuck in an endless cycle of wondering whether you should make a snack or if you should just hold off for dinner.
Maybe this was a good idea.
"Okay,” you decided, “I'll do it."
"Oh... alright. Cool." Kenma was trying his hardest not to show how excited he was that you agreed. When he saw the contemplative look on your face, he was sure you would decide that it'd just be too much work and say no. But hearing you agree made him giddier than he would ever admit to.
Despite the cool and collected façade he thought he was putting on, you saw the smile that threatened to break through and the red tips of his ears. You wondered if he felt the same weight being lifted off his shoulders as you did, knowing that, after this weekend, you'd both be finally out as an official couple to the world.
And, of course, the nausea of having to do all of it live in front of thousands of people. No biggie.
Saturday afternoon came and at 12pm sharp, Kenma began his grueling 24-hour charity stream. The bar had an overall goal of $150,000, and it began filling up at a constant pace right from the start. Donations ranging from $5 to $500 were flowing in rapidly, and you were trying your best not to feel nervous.
You both agreed that if he reached $50,000 within 5 hours, you would join him for an hour or two of Minecraft later that night. Part of you hoped that the donations would slow down and plateau for a bit, but when you saw Kuroo had donated $1000, specifically with the message that he hoped to see you on stream soon, you realized that it was a pipe dream.
So, you had to be your own hype person for now, to get prepared to show your face to thousands of people and not disappoint Kenma.
Whether it was the promise of your face reveal or the people who genuinely adored charity, it took only four hours for Kenma to break $50,000.
When he saw the number update live on stream, the viewers witnessed the most amount of expression Kenma had ever shown: eyes wide as saucers, mouth slightly agape, body frozen. You could see the gears struggling inside his head struggling to turn and comprehend what they all managed to do so early on in the stream.
"Thanks so much, everyone, for being so generous today... I guess this means we'll be having my partner on later tonight," he announced. You watched his chat explode with excitement, his special emotes flying in the chat.
You picked up your phone to shoot Kenma a quick text.
[you]:: hope you're ready to put our minecraft beds together in front of thousands of people 😏
Unsurprisingly, he left you on read. But dating him for this long meant you weren't even a little bit afraid of double or triple texting.
[you]:: maybe we can kiss under the light of an exploding creeper 😫
[you]:: or have a romantic walk through our rainbow sheep while a phantom looms overhead 🥰
It was after the third text when you finally saw him pick up his phone to text you back. You eagerly awaited his response, only to cackle when you read it.
[my sugar daddy]:: im going to replace you with hinata as my partner if you dont stop
Instead of annoying him any further, you set your phone to charge on your nightstand and went into the bathroom to get ready for the stream later.
Once you emerged, you picked up your phone to check the percentage and noticed a text from Kenma stating that he'd have you on at 8pm. You decided to spend the time until then cooking up some dinner for the both of you.
It seemed like time flew by because by the time you were done eating your food, it was 7:45pm. Only fifteen more minutes before you were live in front of all of Kenma's supporters. You refilled your water bottle and sat on the couch, staring at the blank T.V. as you practically dissociated from reality until Kenma came out of his office to retrieve you.
You noticed that he looked just as nervous as you did, despite his face not showing it the way yours did. His shoulders were up to his ears with tension, and his hoodie drawstring was pulled almost all the way through due to him fiddling with it.
He turned briefly to you after he brought you into his office, gesturing to make sure you knew to wait until he gave you the cue. He sat down, unmuted himself, and took down the 'away' screen he had for his audience.
This was it. Everything was going to change in literally ten seconds.
"Well, everyone...please welcome my partner, (Y/N)."
You walked cautiously around his large gaming chair and sat next to him in your modest desk chair that he had rolled into the room for the occasion.
Okay, you thought to yourself, now don't fuck this up.
"Hi, everyone."
Nailed it.
There was a painful moment of silence before the stream finally caught up, and you both heaved a sigh of relief when you saw nothing but declarations of excitement. Amongst the 'AHHHs' and spam of emotes were sweet comments about your appearance and how cute you two looked as a couple. You peeked over at Kenma and saw the ghost of a smile on his lips, elated to know that he was just as relieved as you were.
"Okay, let's start with the gameplay while we answer some questions," he said.
The questions and gameplay started out mild; when did you both start dating, how did you meet, who asked the other out first. They even asked a few simple questions about you specifically, like your favorite anime and your star sign. And while you did see a few bans in the chat after some inappropriate questions –no, you will not tell them the color of your underwear– most were easy and simple enough to answer.
Then they started to get a bit spicier.
"Bokutoslefttit donated $69.69 and asked, 'what is your main pet peeve with Kenma?'" he read, muttering a 'wow' under his breath at the username.
"Ooh, how can I be polite when exposing you?" you pondered while beating a cow to death with your sword. "It's probably how loud he gets whenever he's playing games with his good headphones on."
"I don't get loud," he defended.
"Oh yeah, you do. I've had to come in here several times to tell you to shut up like I'm your mother. I did it literally two days ago when you were playing with Lev."
"... Next question."
You rolled your eyes at his lack of comment but glanced over at the chat to pull up a new question. You stifled a laugh when you read, "Girlboss420 asked 'who has a fatter ass, Kuroo or (Y/N)?'"
"I'm not answering that."
"Come oooon, this is a Q&A. Can't have the Q’s without the A’s."
"Nope."
You were about to start reprimanding him for implying that Kuroo's ass was fatter than yours when you noticed he ran past you with a group of pillagers following closely behind. You turned to head into the house but when you opened the door, you noticed it was blocked off by obsidian.
"You are the absolute worst!" you exclaimed.
You made a break for it, sprinting past the shooting pillagers and around to the front of the house. You made it inside with only 2 hearts to spare. You turned, in real life, to Kenma to see him tight-lipped to avoid smiling about his betrayal.
"I'm moving my bed downstairs for the rest of the stream."
You both carried on with the stream without another incident, turning to the chat every now and again to answer some questions. Kenma even apologized to you by bringing home a horse that was named "I'm sorry."
It was about an hour and a half after you sat down when Kenma decided that he needed a bathroom break. Your heart fell to your ass when you realized that you'd be all alone to entertain his chat. You considered saying that you needed to pee as well, if it meant not having the spotlight on you.
Instead, when he got up to pee, you smiled and asked him to bring you back a snack and a refill. Oh, how the turns have tabled.
In the meantime, you decided to scroll through the chat and some of the donations to pick out another question to answer since Kenma was gone. You were initially looking for a funny or vulgar comment when you saw one that had a completely different vibe.
"Kermithateblog donated $25.00 and asked, 'what's your favorite part about being with Kenma?' Wow, that's a really sweet question. Let me think for a moment."
You paused to reflect on your relationship with Kenma over the two years you’d been together. You'd had your fair share of highs and lows like any other couple, but, in the end, you both learned how to work things out so you were both equally as happy in the relationship.
"So, as you guys know, he's a busy boy with streaming, creating content for YouTube, and also being a CEO of his own company, which all takes up the majority of his time," you began. "But when he finally can shut off his screens and crawls into bed late at night, I know that he's 100% there with me at that moment. He is able to give me his undivided attention and make me feel like his love for me comes above his love for gaming."
You gave a pause, trying not to get too emotional. You rarely got the chance to gush about Kenma because you knew how much he hated having attention on him, so if this was going to be your only opportunity to do so for a while, then you were going to take it.
"What y'all don't know is that he is the biggest baby when it comes to cuddling," you laughed. "He is absolutely the little spoon most of the time, and he loves when I stroke his hair and love on him all night. In a weird way, it makes me feel special and loved knowing that he trusts me enough to be vulnerable with me. I cherish the amount of time we have together because of that."
What you didn't know was that he had come back from refilling your water bottle rather quickly and stood outside the doorway to hear your speech. His heart almost burst when he heard your tender words describing how he made you feel. He knew that you rarely got to hear how much those quiet moments at night meant to him because he was guarded with his feelings.
Which is why he started into the room on a mission.
You smiled as soon as you saw him. "Welcome back, babe, we were just talking about--"
He approached you swiftly and leaned down to press a gentle kiss on your forehead. You hardly even got to bask in the moment before he was pulling away, setting down your water bottle as he sat back down with his controller in hand like he didn't just expose to his audience how much of a softy he really was.
It was in that moment when you realized how glad you were that you’d decided to appear on stream because you'd be able to look back at that clip over and over again to relive the intimate moment.
Noon on Sunday came at last. Kenma would finally be free from the prison of his office. Not to mention he could finally get off his ass and stretch.
Between your official appearance on stream and the sign-off, you popped in a few more times to say hello to the chat when you brought him some snacks and drinks. You stayed up through most of the night, although you accidentally napped for a few hours during the dead of night which gave you a little boost in energy.
In the end, the stream was a monumental success. Kenma had even managed to blow past his goal of $150k and make it to over $200k, which meant that he'd be getting the full e-body makeover for his next week of streams.
By the time Kenma came into your bedroom after freshening up and having a small snack, you were already dead asleep with your laptop propped open to show his now offline stream.
He tip-toed around the bed quietly, closed your laptop, pulled the covers up and over your curled-up body, and slipped in himself. As he settled, he felt you shift and grab at his worn t-shirt, opening your eyes slightly just to confirm that it's him.
He pulled you against his chest tightly, his body finally able to relax. He was sure it wouldn't be too long before he completely fell out.
"That was more fun than I thought it'd be," he heard you utter quietly.
"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." His fingers gently danced across your shoulder blades as you mushed your face into his clean shirt. "I can't believe we raised so much today so quickly."
"I'm so proud of you, baby. You worked so hard on this."
"I also donated $2000 anonymously to speed up the process," he mumbled sheepishly, pressing a gentle kiss on the crown of your head in hopes to lessen the blow of his secret.
It was quiet for a moment, and he wondered if he’d genuinely pissed you off before he felt the vibrations from your laugh against his chest.
"...I can't wait to ruin your hair, e-boy."
Written by: Luna
#kenma x reader#kenma kozume x reader#haikyuu x reader#kenma imagines#haikyuu imagines#kenma x y/n#kenma x you#haikyu x reader#haikyuu!! x reader#hq x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#our writing#kenma fluff#haikyuu fluff#luna writes
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Excluding the comics, did Zuko hurt Azula more than she ever hurt him overall? Coz I've been hearing that argument all over the place a lot lately...
Before I can even begin to explain my point of view on that, we need to take a look at how their dynamic works (and how it changed over the years)
In “Ember Island Players” Zuko says their family was happy - a long, long, LONG time ago. We don’t know how exactly Zuko and Azula acted towards each other, but looking just at that line we could maybe assume they behaved more like normal siblings.
In “Zuko Alone”, that family is already miserable 90% of the time and no one was even disfigured yet. Azula is the typical bratty little sister, and while she says some fucked up shit, she doesn’t really do anything that “evil” towards him - her worst offense would be sounding way too happy while telling Zuko their dad is going to kill him, but she did warn him. Even though she’s not really doing much bad shit to him, she’s not really being nice either, except for a ONE SECOND scene of the two of them playing with each other in the garden (we don’t know who asked who to play, or if their mother told them to play together) and that scene of their mother reading them the letter Iroh sent. Zuko deliberately avoids his sister and even though her teasing is usually pretty mild, he quite clearly takes it all very seriously and personally because their father favors Azula, but ignores him. However, Zuko does act a like a proper older brother once or twice (and basically does Ursa’s job of communicating things to the literal 8-year-old better than she did) by saying things like “How would you feel if cousin Lu Ten wanted dad to die?” or “He’s probably just sad that his only son is gone. Forever” when Azula is being insensitive about the idea/reality of their relatives dying.
In “The Storm” the show has a flashback with Azula seemingly enjoying seeing her Ozai burning Zuko’s face. We don’t really know if that reaction was genuine, a result of fear of the consequences if she didn’t react positively to it, or both, but it’s pretty fair to assume that if Zuko somehow found about that reaction, he’d probably be very hurt - but again, we don’t even know if he is aware this happened. What we DO know is that the trauma of that Agni Kai and of his three years of banishment made Zuko very bitter, angry and frustrated, to the point that he is lashing out at everyone (including Iroh, who we know he cares for) for the smallest of things, and he very clearly resents Azula for being their father’s favorite - to the point that he is angry at her for being “perfect”, instead of being pissed off at his father for his unfair standards (which makes sense considering Ozai basically brainwashed him into believing all of his misery is Azula’s fault)
On “Avatar State” Zuko instantly reacts negatively the second he sees his sister. Since she’s there on a mission to capture him, they spent pretty much the entire season being openly hostile to each other. The ONE TIME Zuko says something that might, maybe, perhaps indicate that, on some level, he believes it isn’t right for them to be at each other’s throats since they’re family is when he goes “Uncle, I know what you’re going to say: she’s my sister, and I should try to get along with her” implying someone tried to give him some sense of obligation to his sister (likely Ursa, considering she did agree with Azula’s “We’re brother and sister, we should spend time together”). Iroh then responds not with a understandable warning for Zuko to be careful since the idea of family quite clearly isn’t stopping Azula from trying to capture them, but instead with the infamous and terrible “No. She’s crazy and needs to go down.” Zuko doesn’t argue at all.
In “Crossroads of Destinity” however, Azula genuinely offers Zuko the chance to go home, he only joins the fight when Aang and Katara are cornering her, and she even gives him some emotional support after the battle is won. Unfortunately, in “The Awakening”, because Zuko doesn’t trust her for many reasons (some less valid than others) he lies to her about there being no chance of the Avatar having survived. Azula recognizes that as a lie, feels threatened, and tells Ozai Zuko was the one to kill Aang, so he will be the one who will be punished if he really is alive.
However, during the rest of his short return to the Fire Nation, Azula is being much, much nicer to her brother than she ever did before, warning him to be careful if he’s going to visit Iroh, asking the guys at the beach if they’re not going to invite both her and Zuko to their party, not letting him sulk on his misery at their old beach house, offering emotional support in the form of arson, answering his question about Sozin’s death, and pointing out to him that OF COURSE he’s welcomed at the war meeting - he’s the freaking prince. She still crosses a few lines every now and again and can still be a little bratty, but mostly she seems to have matured quite a lot, and to have no ill will towards him despite their recent conflict prior to Ba Sing Se. Zuko on the other hand, quite clearly still resents her and doesn’t trust her after all that happened, and his behavior is now the reverse of what it was like in “Zuko Alone” - he doesn’t really go out of his way to avoid her anymore, but never really tries to initiate any interaction with her, and he surely doesn’t offer any guidance, however limited.
On “The Day Of Black Sun” Zuko leaves the Fire Nation without so much as leaving a letter to Azula, and he tells Ozai that she was the one who failed to kill Aang - he does it for the sake of honesty, but the result still is that he carelessly told Ozai something that could make him furious at Azula simply because he didn’t understand that there’s a difference between being his favorite and being safe from his wrath. Since they’re on opposing sides again, they go back to constant fighting. In “The Southern Raiders” Azula attacks Zuko with the explicit intent to kill him, yet when he sees her falling “to her death” he looks a bit conflicted... only to then have a 100% negative reaction when she saves herself. In the finale, while the idea was not his, but Iroh’s, Zuko still does not hesitate for a second once given the mission to kill his sister, and while he shows no mercy, the music makes it all sound like a tragedy. The message is pretty clear: while he might not personally want any harm to come to Azula, Zuko sees her as a problem that needs to be solved - all that changes is what kind of problem she is (his personal rival or yet another soldier of the enemy). He also dismisses Azula when she says that she is sorry things have to end that way (she’s also in “battle mode” so to speak, and he is an obstacle to be dealt with), and she was quite clearly being sarcastic... but that line sounds a lot more genuine than even she had probably meant it to be when you consider the context of it all.
It basically comes down to what would be worse for you personally: someone who will (intentionally) do both good and bad things for you, which can be confusing, disappointing, hurtful, and maybe even make you a little paranoid/overly-defensive, or someone who isn’t really putting in any effort, and thus giving you no expectations, but also being frustrating if YOU are putting in effort in bonding with them, and who will also make dumb (but genuine) mistakes due to being too absorbed in their own problems and not understanding that said mistakes also affect you (which leads to them repeating said mistakes, which can be quite infuriating).
This dynamic is part of why I want Zuko to be the one to help Azula. He was too focused on his own issues to notice that his sister was begging for help AND genuinely trying to connect with him, so now that his life is more stable and he has undeniable proof that Azula’s life was NOT the easy, perfect life their father made him believe she had, it is the perfect time for him to open his eyes and try to correct his mistakes - but now Azula is in a position where she doesn’t trust anybody, especially not the older brother who left her, defeated her, and took her crown after she legitimately tried to help him. It’d lead to conflict, growth, and happiness after the storm is over and they manage to make things work at last, and I fucking live for that kind of story.
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Fave Sprites in each AA Game: AAI1
(Spoilers for Ace Attorney Investigations 1)
So, this game confuses me. On the one hand, I really enjoy the new gameplay format and third-person movement. It also has some of my favorite character designs. But on the other hand, this is the ugliest Ace Attorney game in the whole series. It's also the weakest in terms of actual plot and cases. And I want you all to know that I have never disliked playing an Ace Attorney case (I enjoy 2-3, 4-3, 6-4, etc) but this is the only Ace Attorney game I would consider bad. First of all, I hate the art style they went for. It's a sort of anime-y style that works well for some characters, but then you have Ernest Amano and Zinc Le Blanc. Well, whatever, we're not here to talk about the negatives (I'll leave that for another time) so let's get into the animations I do enjoy.
(Oh, btw I have other posts on the other games, check them out)
Animation 1:
Kay Faraday. Mhmmm.
As a new character, I kind of don't love her inclusion (I personally think that having Ema be the main assistant would have made much more sense and added a better character dynamic).
But design-wise? She rocks. I love her scarf, and her hair, and her bag, etc. I also really appreciate the new "tiny" sprites that showcase larger actions with the whole character's design being shown. They're cute and chibi and great.
This animation in particular is very punchy (pun intended), and it creates a nice loop. I like how she bounces from side to side before stopping to punch with some nice smears on her jabs.
Final verdict: Kay's writing may not be my cup of tea, but I love how energetic and fun her animations are.
Animation 2:
Another "tiny" sprite and another animation that utilizes smear to showcase a fast action. I think that the reason why smears are so common in this game is because they make the whole animation much easier to read on such a small screen and sprite.
Well, the reason why I chose this animation isn't really thanks to the animation quality, but more so just how fucking cool it is. It's just cool to see Lang calmly catch Franziska's whip seconds before it hits him.
As much as I love Franziska, sometimes it's great to see someone stand up to her while she's acting like a spoiled child.
Animation 3:
We have arrived at my favourite character in AAI; Callisto Yew. She's so great. I love her fairly simplistic design, her carefree attitude towards Edgeworth's dramatic personality, etc. Her laughs are always animated wonderfully. Actually let's move on to the next animation and I'll discuss her a bit more there.
Animation 4:
So, animations 3 and 4 are fairly similar from a conceptual level; it is just Callisto laughing. But they're so amazing because you can almost feel and hear her laughter. In the first one she's cackling loudly and trying to stop herself. In the second animation she's completely out of breath and still letting out a few laughs. Overall her animations are sincere and really charming.
Idk if she's an assassin super spy or whatnot. If she kills me don't blame her: she caught ME slipping.
Animation 5:
I'm SORRY. I'm WEAK and I couldn't HELP IT. I had to put Ema on here and how could I NOT choose the iconic DS sprite (I mean, that's definitely a Nintendo DS, right?). This sprite has a special spot in my heart because my childhood DS, that i still use, is the exact same shade of pink <3
Also I love the small detail of the DS screen being reflected on her glasses, causing that to be one of the few animated things in the whole sprite (the other being her arms and fingers).
Honestly, as much as I dislike most of AAI's art design, the highs are VERY high, and I love Callisto and Ema.
Anyways, next time I'll do AAI2, which I really love a LOT. It's gonna be harder to find animations online, because the website I use only has sprite sheets. If you guys know a good website with a lot of AAI2's animations I'd really appreciate it if you'd let me know.
BYE!
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To change the topic: in Telepathy Part 2, there is a rather interesting dynamic filmed, as Jimin assertively tried playing with Jungkook, which he engaged with a little, but then when Jimin wanted to bump heads, I assume as a gesture of exchanging thoughts, Jungkook backed out and landed by Taehyung's side and they stayed like that, resting on each other for minutes.
Looks like Jungkook wanted to balance this over the top approach out, but otherwise no one seemed bothered. I have always considered Jimin more of a wingman in this dynamic.
He probably is like a tamagotchi who would die without attention, but otherwise very much reserved with people who he could have the potential of getting any criticism from. That's why he lets it all out on Jungkook (without any romantic connotations in my eye). I guess he is more empathic towards his ways. Taehyung for example, would tell him to stop being desperate/tactical, as he half-jokingly told Jin at the table for less. But he is not a controlling a-hole to tell Jungkook how to treat him.
Interesting thoughts! I noticed a lot of the same things, including the fact that around the same time that Jungkook put his hand on Taehyung’s shoulder, he reached for Jimin’s as well, but Jimin happened to be leaning over at that moment, so he was out of reach. It just goes to show, in my opinion, that even though we see Jungkook pull away from Jimin a lot (or literally run away from him like he did in this episode lol), it’s still clear that Jungkook loves Jimin and the two of them are close.
I really think that sort of push-and-pull thing that they do is just one of the ways that they play. I feel like Jimin knows he can push Jungkook’s buttons, maybe because Jungkook goes along with it more, as you’ve said, maybe because Jungkook is, culturally speaking, the only member who is younger than him, since Taehyung is considered “same-age.”
Sometimes Jungkook goes along with it more than other times, and who really knows what dictates those changes? It does read as him feeling uncomfortable to me, but in a playful way that I think Jimin is poking at intentionally. As I’ve said, it’s obvious Jungkook isn’t actually uncomfortable, in any real way, with just being around Jimin, and the two are clearly good friends.
I don’t really think it’s fair to say that Jimin would die without attention, though I assume you don’t mean that in a negative way really. I do think he seems to be very extroverted and puts a lot of work into maintaining his relationships within BTS as well as outside of it. It’s hard for me to guess whether Taehyung would tell Jimin off for doing too much in their interactions though, because their natural inclination with each other already seems pretty extreme to me. They’re so cuddly and touchy and goofy that it’s hard to imagine Taehyung thinking Jimin is going overboard.
I think you’ve pointed to a distinction between the different relationships in the maknae line though, because it’s true that Jimin doesn’t tease or push Tae in the same way that he does with Jungkook. What all of that means specifically, we can only make our observations and interpret them through our own lenses.
In any case, I really enjoyed today’s episode so much. I felt so bad for everyone who ended up going somewhere alone, but the dopamine hit every time a new member joined the group was so delightful. When Hobi and Yoongi found each other, I was so happy lol.
And of course, Taekook were adorable. I feel like it’s always nice to see Jungkook reach out to Tae first, and then he was also gazing adoringly at him after their dinner, and my heart fully melted at the look on Tae’s face when Jungkook caught up to the group. Overall a very fun episode, in my opinion!
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a ramble about helium chapter 4 (and dakota’s wonderful characterization)
its 4am, forgive me for any mistakes. i’ve never written anything like this before, aha.
All of these quotes are from Chapter 4 of @heytherestilinski‘s fic Helium!
The way Dakota (the author) fleshes out conflict and allows their painfully realistic characterization to shine is so...perfect. I find myself heavily relating to Dream, George, and even Sapnap at times.
Here are some lines that I didn’t think would stick out to me (but did):
After a quiet moment, to his soaring heart’s approval, George speaks up again.
This entire kitchen scene portrays that feeling of having a conversation with someone who matters to you. Whether it would classify as something important to someone else or not is irrelevant- to you, in that moment, it feels like you’re holding the world. It’s soft, and tender. You don’t want it to fall flat. You don’t want to let it go. (This scene may or may not have encouraged me to say goodnight to a special someone I was thinking of while reading this).
Sapnap dumps the responsibility of the cart back onto Dream. As he walks past him, he says, “You suck at flirting.”
I really enjoyed the stupid banter between Dream and Sapnap at the grocery store. It not only served as some nice comic relief that kept our guard down before the conflict at the end of the chapter, but it’s also something us readers would definitely hear from (and say to) our friends in real life. Good comic relief is something that eases us in naturally and allows us to immerse ourselves and enjoy the moment while maintaining that element of surprise that keeps us interested :)
He turns away from Dream. “I don’t want to talk about this.”
Dream may be less controlled in his emotions and impulses, but he is very open in sharing them. George has more of a filter on everything. Controlled. Not wanting to push Dream (or maybe even himself) off the edge.
“You wanted to this morning,” he says, low.
“Yeah, because we were in your house, not the middle of the grocery store.”
Rejection. Denial. George’s response holds some truth to it, but comes off as a haphazard excuse at the same time. He doesn’t appreciate the way Dream pushes for that direct confrontation and frankness when it comes to approaching their situation (and honestly? Neither would I).
George halts to face him again, with a half-whisper, “Not exactly the best place to ambush me, Dream.”
I like the use of the word ambush here because of the strong negative connotation it implies. It’s as if he’s saying that Dream sought out to make him uncomfortable. As if this was pre-planned and intentional, and not another one one of his silly impulses.
Dream stares at him wildly. “I didn’t ambush you. You brought up your expectations, not me.” His voice grows tight. “Are you seriously still going to act like this?”
We’ve had enough of “Dream, why? Dream, no! Dream, quit being an idiot!” from the readers. This time, he takes that blame and tosses it over to George instead. Conflict grows stronger.
“Like I’m—I’m this stumbling idiot who forces you into every bad situation,” he says. “It’s exhausting, and doesn't make me feel good about myself, and—” He runs a trembling hand through his hair. “It’d be nice if you took some responsibility, for once. That’s all.”
God, I’m so guilty of how George does this to Dream. Taking responsibility isn’t very fun when you feel like the other person is constantly making irrational, immature, and as we’ve established earlier, overall impulsive decisions when it comes to what they say and do. We assume that the other person should be able to understand us- We’ve put up with them for all this time, haven’t we?
Realizing that having a mentality like this is toxic and draining to the other person as well is... difficult. It’s difficult to remember that they’re trying, and that they genuinely care about you too. The very same things that make them irritating are what make them a loving and caring person as well. It takes growth from the both of you to learn and understand each other. And growth takes time.
It’s 4AM at the time I’m writing this, and I’m far too tired to quote the entire phone scene, so I’m going to assume you’ve read it.
A few lines from George:
“Can...can you stay on, for a bit? Can we just talk?”
“Please, Dream.”
“I just want to hear your voice.”
A few lines from Dream:
“George.”
“Stop,” he warned. “Stop that.”
“Don’t say that.” // “What is wrong with you?”
“Fuck, George. Why are you doing this to me?”
The reason Dream brings this up is because it highlights a moment where their general character roles in the fic are switched. In this scenario, it highlights a moment of hypocrisy. George is desperate, and vulnerable. The phone call dialogue showcases him doing something that he knows he shouldn’t be doing. “Can we not talk about this? Can we pretend this phone call didn’t happen?”
Now, plenty of ugly nights and long weeks later, he steps closer to George in the grocery aisle as an unconcerned passerby skirts around their cart and conflict.
I’m not sure why I like this line. It feels like a gentle reminder that in the grand scheme of things, your conflict is small. Insignificant to the rest of the world, mattering to you two and only you two. Makes everything a bit more personal, I guess.
He looms over him, wishing he could melt the bristling anger from his brown eyes, and wishing he had it in himself to be angry, too.
I relate to both sides of this. That gut-wrenching feeling of not being able to find your own anger at someone who is angry at you. The feeling of knowing that your anger is frustrating and hurting someone else, too. Either way, it feels absolutely terrible.
“You called me,” Dream recounts, even though he can tell George remembers it as vividly as he. “You talked to me.” He lets out a short, frustrated breath. “Then you got mad at me the next morning, and iced me out.”
Doing the same thing that you hated the other person for doing, and taking it out on them afterwards. Yeah.
(dakota. dream. can you pls stop calling me out through george i would really really really appreciate it thank u) /hj /lh
“Because you let it happen,” George says, but he looks more vulnerable than before.
blame game here we go againnnnn
Dream stares down at him. “So it’s all on my shoulders,” he reiterates flatly. “It’s all my responsibility, now?”
“Yes,” George spits, his sharpness startling them both. He meets Dream's gaze, unwavering, and recollects himself with a deep breath.
“Yes. Because you made it your responsibility, when you sent me that text.”
George was ready to throw that blame right back into Dream’s face. When I saw that whole scene in Heat Waves, I realized how much I related to George in that particular situation. I knew it would come back, somehow. George wouldn’t be able to let something as huge as that, something that shifted the entire course of their relationship...slide so easily. Even with Dream’s eventual promise to work on himself. The whole time, I was thinking, “He’s too nice. He’s too patient,” and, “I wouldn’t be that nice. I wouldn’t be that patient. Not on the inside, at least.”
And you didn’t fail me. That final jab, although relatable- It hurt.
Now that the screens are off, the distance is gone, and the barriers are thinner than ever before, George’s flaws are becoming more transparent. We start to see other parts of his character that had only been foreshadowed in your previous work. I had no idea how Helium would unfold at the beginning, but I’m now very sure that you did not disappoint.
Seeing how you’ve evolved as a writer in both more subtle and more noticeable ways has been awesome :) I’m excited for the next chapter.
#heat waves#dreamland#helium#im very sorry if this is bad#im no fearwastaken#dnf#dreamnotfound#long post#be warned#i cant believe i did this.#kinda nervous to post#edit: ok wow this did really well#thanks to everyone <3 and dakota omg#helium analysis
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“Scenting” Obey Me Fluff (slightly sexual)
All demon brothers x Female! MC
Introduction: when in Devildom, MC always knew demons were very different from her human self but she never knew they did something called “scenting” until some random demons did it to her, ensuing a very possessive & peeved off demon brothers
MC sat at her desk as she normally would but quieter than usual, compared to her other classes she’d be surrounded by her demons but this was the only class that she had none of them in. Sighing out of boredom, she hunched over her desk as she waited for the bell to ring but was interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. She looked up to meet black eyes that belonged to one of the many demon classmates she had grown used to ignoring.
“Hah! I told you! She finally noticed me!” He cheered cockily at his friends that stood alongside him, each very different from the other. “Jeez, I almost gave up on getting your attention, human,” he winked flirtatiously, which MC just blinked at in an oblivious manner.
“Hey! Just because she noticed you first doesn’t mean she doesn’t see the rest of us either!” The shorter out the bunch yelled out defensively.
“Ah, sorry...? I never realized anyone was trying to get my attention. Could I help you with something?” She questioned, holding a finger to her chin. After multiple lectures from Lucifer and the others but mostly Lucifer she had grown accustomed to not conversing with other demons since she was told they wanted nothing but to eat or hurt her and what idiot was not gonna take that warning? It surprised her that they seemed overall harmless, other than a common spark in the eyes of each of the demons in front of her.
“W-well, it’s not necessarily something you can help with...” a particularly shy-looking demon stepped forward, his black hair covered his eyes like a curtain which he nervously patted at. “W-we have a slight, ahem, fascination with h-humans...particularly y-you,” he trailed off as a taller demon slung an arm around his shoulders.
“Quit beating around the bush! We like you, human! You’re pretty cute!” Said demon announced, winking then continuing to give the shy boy a noogie.
A melodious giggle to their ears erupted from her throat at the slight blushing faces of her previously unknown classmates in front of her. “I’m flattered! I didn’t think I met up to demons’ preferences,” she laughed. MC was happy to be conversing with others for once, not being isolated to just the seven brothers felt as if a weight was lifted off her shoulders which she hadn’t noticed before and the fact that they found her cute was all the better.
“Nah! Attractive up there is still attractive down here! All we really prefer is that our horns don’t get caught up with each other when kissing and since you don’t have any it’s all the better!” The first demon replied cheerily, patting at her head to get the point across as she laughed. “Not to mention, since you’re human, you have a different type of beauty ‘bout you that we’re not too used to,” he continued, boldly leaning close and tipping her chin upward with a finger.
It was MC’s turn to blush. As her cheeks dusted with a slight pink tone, she couldn’t help but giggle at her classmates’ antics. “You guys are a funny bunch. I like y’all!” she commented happily, smiling at the four demons in front of her. It felt strange to not feel afraid of anyone other than her particular seven demons but not in a negative way. Inside she hoped that this would start a domino effect of others wanting to try striking up a conversation with her, the thought made her feel warm inside. The four stepped back in surprise at her revelation, whilst blushing at her cute smile they all shared a look with one another.
“D-do you mind if we, um, s-scent you...” the shy demon stuttered out as he twiddled his fingers nervously, fearing her reply to such an intimate request. Seeing her head cocked to the side, he quickly tried to explain himself. “A-Ah! We don’t want to fully scent you! Just one rub to show our interest in you is all! We would never fully scent without an established relationship! It’s just to show that we’re trying to court you is all! Y-you don’t even have to accept!” He rambled, jumping forward out of how frazzled he was which revealed his two gold eyes from underneath the curtain of pitch black hair.
“Sorry to interrupt, but what is ‘scenting’ exactly?” She questioned, confused at what it was and why there were different types. Realizing she didn’t know what it meant, the shy demon’s legs gave out from embarrassment as the taller demon caught him, his outbursts seemed to be normal to them.
“Oh, right! You’re human so you don’t know!” The shortest realized, putting his fist in to his other hand. “Hmm, long story short it’s what demons do to show our interest in someone,” he shrugged simply, but a sly glint in his eye as well as the smirk that lifted his lips said something else, which MC didn’t quite catch. “Here! I’ll show ya!” He continued before dipped down and nuzzling his neck against hers just once before pulling away with a satsifactory grin as he inhaled.
“Hey, you’re leaving some things out-“ the black-eyed demon spoke up before the shortest cut him off.
“You don’t mind it, right? It’s completely harmless!” He shrugged, holding his hands up and shaking his head innocently. The other three waited quietly in anticipation.
“I-I guess,” MC nodded which four smiled triumphantly at. The black-eyed demon didn’t waste time in following the prior demon’s actions but with a warmer smile before the taller did the same, a flirtatious lift to his lips. That left only the shy demon to scoot hesitantly close before rubbing his neck against hers. Once. Twice. Before being pulled away by the other three.
“Hey! What are ya trying to do? Don’t be going overboard with the scenting, dumbass!” The tallest reprimanded, holding him by the back of his collar.
“I-I’m sorry! I got carried away! I wasn’t going to do anything more! Promise!” He wailed as the three pulled him out the classroom just as the bell rang, not forgetting to wave at her as they left.
“Strange. I wonder what the brothers will have to say.” She thought to herself.
-
Disappointed but not surprised that the brothers each had plans after school, she walked home alone that day. One would think at least one would stay behind for her safety, but she felt that they were beginning to get too used to having her around and often forgot she was human, which was nice she was so included and familiar to them but annoying nonetheless when she didn’t get to see anyone until dinner. Beel and Satan had after school activities, which she understood as well as Lucifer having his own duties to Lord Diavolo but the other four’s excuses were ridiculous to her. Mammon texted her to inform that he was going to be trying to break into Diavolo’s office at school with the full intent to steal any valuables in there, Levi had shut himself in at some newly opened Internet cafe and refused to even do his online classes there, Belphie had disappeared somewhere most likely in a strange spot sleeping, and Asmo was completely focused on waiting in line at a popular cake store since morning just for what he called the “perfect Devilgram post”.
By the time she had gotten home she had completely forgotten about the whole “scenting” thing and decided to take a shower. She had just gotten out when she heard hurried footsteps leading to her door. Acting quickly, she ran to the door and locked it before anyone could enter and see her in all her naked glory. This was met with a deep “oof” as the person hit the door, expecting it to open, and followed it with loud knocks when it didn’t.
“Oi! Why’s the door locked? Who ya got in there? I can smell ‘em!” Mammon’s voice berated as he incessantly banged at the door, awaiting his human’s answer. He stopped briefly to press his nose against the crack of the locked door as he deeply inhaled to pinpoint the foreign scent before starting back up again. “Oiiii! Who’s scent is that? That ain’t any of my brothers or mine!” He yelled.
“Yeah, because it’s mine! I just got out the shower! Are you a bloodhound or somethin’? Am I not allowed to lock the door or would ya rather see me naked?” She yelled back, annoyed at his questions. Obviously she’s going to smell like her body fragrance after coming out the shower, what kind of question is that?
Blushing at her remark, he stopped knocking but still cocked his head to the side out of confusion. He knew her scent so why did it smell different? Shaking his head, he brushed it off as a new body lotion or something among those lines. “I’ve told ya! Demons have got a stronger sense of smell than ya humans! Anyways, I’m on dinner duty and it’ll be done in thirty minutes so I expect ya down here right when it’s done! The Great Mammon’s food shouldn’t be kept waiting, alright?” He stated.
“Yeah, yeah! I’ll be down there when I’m ready to!” She answered angrily, his questioning from earlier and the fact that he abandoned her to try breaking into Diavolo’s office instead taking play.
-
She took her time after that, knowing fully well that dinner was ready and the others were sat waiting for their beloved human that they neglected all day to come down and eat with them. By the time she came down, they had all been seated and Beel was already on his fifth plate which didn’t take him long mind you.
“Ah, better late than never, I suppose,” Lucifer commented teasingly, noting her damp hair as her excuse.
“Hurry up and eat before Beel devours it all!” Mammon ushered at the seat in front of him, he usually sat beside her but the twins had beat him to it since there was only one seat she preferred to sit at.
Taking her usual seat, she began to eat but it wasn’t long before a faint but definitely there foreign scent emanated from her. Reaching Belphie first while Beel was too busy stuffing his face with food. It roused him from his short slumber he decided to take at the dinner table, as he inched forward towards his human’s neck. She jumped when she felt his nose pressed against her nape as he inhaled and pulled away with a disgruntled look on his face.
“Why do you smell like that?” Belphie sneered. At this point, the smell had reached Beel as well and he promptly stopped his feasting to investigate. He followed Belphie’s actions but on the opposite side, deeply inhaling before quickly pulling away with furrowed eyebrows.
“Yeah...you smell like someone else,” Beel growled, surprising her at the tone of his voice. The smell wafted towards the other brothers as well and it wasn’t long before they were all on their feet, surrounding her with quizzical expressions while each taking turns of two to sniff at her exposed neck as she sat red-faced at the attention. She knew she was a bit petty from being neglected earlier but she didn’t expect this much attention at once!
“I knew I smelt something-someone earlier!” Mammon said as he angrily took another whiff, which only peeved him off more.
“How strange,” Satan hummed, a smile on his face that she knew masked his anger all too well. The brothers tried to rack their brains from what the scent could be from before Levi suddenly gasped.
“S-she’s been scented!” He revealed before dipping down yet again to smell. “And by, what seems like, multiple demons!” He continued, an angry flush against his cheeks. All the brothers looked at each other before returning their attention back to MC, who sat looking dazed in her chair.
“Now, now, lets give her space,” Lucifer commanded, waving his hand for his brothers to step away. “Care for an explanation, darling?” He questioned, the glint in his eye and slight furrow of his forehead outing his subdued anger as he felt a crack in his pride that some lowly demon, multiple in fact, had scented his human and she allowed it. He held a threatening but gentle hand on her shoulder as she tried her best to rack her brain to recall why she would smell like someone else. A lightbulb lighting up in her brain when she finally recalled.
“Ah! I talked to four classmates of mine for the first time and they mentioned something about ‘scenting’, I didn’t really understand it and next thing I knew they were doing it so that’s probably why!” She explained, looking up at the brothers with innocent eyes that made their hearts squeeze. So, she didn’t know.
“And what did they tell you about it exactly?” Lucifer questioned further.
“Hmm, they said demons do it to show their interest in someone? Something about courting?” She replied.
“Aw, my poor darling! Taken advantage like that!” Asmo cooed as he threw his arms around her.
“O-oh, did they lie?” She asked sheepishly.
“More like gave ya half-truths!” Mammon answered as he ran a hand through his hair in a frustrated manner. “Satan, explain,” he sighed, waving his hand.
“Well, while what they said was true it was very vague and not all of it. Scenting is when a demon claims one as their own, it’s territorial and tells other demons to back off or else there’s gonna be...problems,” Satan explained in a matter-of-fact manner.
“They mentioned something about not ‘fully’ scenting. What’s that?” She asked.
“Ah, if they did that we’d have their heads,” he chuckled out evilly before resuming his explanation calmly which made her shiver. “Fully scenting is when demons claim one as their mate. It creates a tether between them more romantically intimate than a pact and is stronger smelling than normal scenting. The one who was scented on can also release distress signals when in danger and it’ll alert the other demon almost right away,” he ended.
“A-Ah, so there was more to it,” she laughed weakly, realizing how dumb she was before.
“Hm, yes. Well, it seems that we’ll have to further stake our claim on our human here. Luckily we’re powerful demons, so we can easily break this mediocre scenting,” Lucifer stated before pressing his lips against her neck and harshly sucking, causing a gasp to leak out her lips. He pulled away and smirked at the bright hickey that bloomed on her neck as well as the fading scent that was on her.
“I agree,” Mammon monotoned as he did the same, finding her sweet spot almost instantly as he suckled and kissed on it to leave a deep bruise. “How dare they put their disgusting scent on my human?” He growled against her. She covered her mouth to muffle her voice, but Levi pulled them away.
“I don’t think so,” he tsked, nibbling at her jaw and smirking against her as she gasped at the feeling of his bite on her skin.
“We’ll be covering you with these,” Satan spoke against her, dipping to her clavicle to leave yet another hickey as he circled his tongue around it.
“We’ll put it in places you can’t cover and make it so dark no makeup could make a dent!” Asmo giggled mischievously as he aimed for where her jugular was, causing her to shiver.
Beel licked his lips at the sight of her as he took it upon himself to bite new territory, which was her shoulders. “This is better than when I wanted to eat you when we first met,” he mumbled lowly, lapping at the bite marks he left on her to soothe them.
“Ah, hardly any room for me,” Belphie muttered before taking a bite at the top of her chest, her jumping up as a reaction making him smile smugly.
Oh, how was she was going to avoid prying eyes at school tomorrow?
I’m a whore for scenting so I wanted to give it a go! I think ima make this a series since they didn’t fully scent on her just yet & will probs make a part for each of my bois, Mammon being first of course! Oh and I’m definitely gonna make them smutty because duh probably start off being some fluffy cute cuddles & then progress to absolute ravaging ;) interested?
Oh and what do y’all think of the demons I made up for this story? I kinda like their personalities & antics together idk 🤷🏻♀️
#obey me#demon brothers#obey me shall we date#obey me fandom#obey me x mc#obey me mc#otome game#obey me! shall we date?#obey me fluff#obey me smut#obey me fanfic#obey me fanfiction#lucifer x mc#mammon x mc#leviathan x mc#satan x mc#asmodeus x mc#beelzebub x mc#belphegor x mc#obey me headcanons#all demon brothers x mc#jealousy#claiming#obey me scenting#obey me x reader#swd obey me
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hey so i'm hoping to get some writing advice about creative burnout? like i seem to write in fits and spurts. some months i can churn out a oneshot or chapter everyday and some months i can do one (1) creative thing only. so i'm wondering how to prevent creative burnout and how to just create more smoothly <3 thank you!
Creative Burnout & How To Ward Against It
First, I’d like to preface this all by saying you’re definitely not alone. You probably already know this, but sometimes it’s nice to be reminded.
I know from personal experience that creative burnout can leave you feeling hopeless, detached from yourself—the kind of identity crisis no one needs in 2020.
So buckle in, folks. It’s a dosy.
I. The Symptoms
Not to be the local WebMD page here, but signs of burnout can include:
Procrastination (more than usual)
Dreading writing and feeling stuck or overly perfectionistic when you try
Physical tiredness and/or irritability
Feeling like everything is monotonous
It’s more than just writer’s block. It’s a physical and emotional exhaustion response to something that goes deeper than a simple lack of inspiration. In my experience, and from a bit of research, I’ve found that what your brain is really looking for is dopamine.
Dopamine is essentially your brain’s chemical reward system for doing something interesting or exciting to you. As someone who is diagnosed with ADHD, I have chronically low levels of dopamine, so this is a constant struggle for me—but it is absolutely made worse by creative burnout.
II. The Problem
Studies have shown that the more we do A Thing the less that thing will give us dopamine (unless a component of the activity changes regularly). This is because eventually our brains desensitise to the stimuli provided by the activity, and subsequently, we become disengaged.
But it’s not necessarily The Thing (i.e. writing) that becomes boring. Actually, more than a few factors could be at play here, and the first step to finding a solution is to identify the problem.
1. ENVIRONMENT LACKS EXCITEMENT/CHANGE—
Sometimes, the monotony of everyday life can feed creative burnout. This becomes especially applicable in quarantine when you’re not leaving your house.
What we don’t realise is that even something as small as the variables of driving to and from work, or interacting with passing coworkers, gives us dopamine. So if you have the same routine every day that does not involve any added variables, your brain will begin staunching that dopamine supply.
2. EITHER TOO EASY OR TOO CHALLENGING—
In 1975, Hungarian-American psychologist, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, coined the term “flow”, which refers to a heightened state of creativity and concentration on an activity. Csikszentmihalyi posited that if your skill level is equal to the level of challenge in any given activity, you will experience this state of flow.
The chart below is taken from Csikszentmihalyi’s own study on the subject of flow and motivation. It examines “your skill level” on the x axis in relation to the “challenge level” on the y axis.
Essentially:
Too much challenge + not enough skill = anxiety, worry (which might lead to procrastination and perfectionism)
Too much skill + not enough challenge = boredom, apathy (which might lead to monotony, irritability, and other depression-like symptoms)
Skill level = Challenge level = Flow
3. NOT ENOUGH “ACTIVE” STIMULATION—
When it comes to dopamine seeking, there is a distinct difference between active and passive stimulation in the brain.
Active stimulation is any form of activity that you have to actively engage in. For instance; exercising, doing a crossword puzzle, or reading a book. These kinds of activities not only give you dopamine, they also facilitate critical thinking and problem solving thought processes, which act as catalysts for creativity.
Passive stimulation, on the other hand, comes in the form of television, social media, and YouTube. It’s anything you can consume without having to actively engage. Passive stimulation will indeed give your brain dopamine, however, it won’t activate your creativity.
The problem also lies in the speed at which you receive the dopamine from passive activities. Passive stimulation is so easy to access that the more you consume, the harder it becomes to pick up active stimulation. Your brain expects a hit of dopamine just by picking up a phone or turning on the TV—it becomes addicted to the quick fix of a Netflix binge.
III. The Solutions
Based on the problems mentioned above, I am going to list a few solutions. Keeping in mind that not every solution will work for everyone, these can act as both preventative measures and remedies for someone who is currently burned out.
1. CHANGE UP YOUR ENVIRONMENT/ROUTINE—
Aim to do at least one thing per day that will add “variables” to the monotony. This can be as simple as going on a long walk, dressing up in that bold outfit you always wanted to wear to the office but never did, or sitting at a different workspace in your home.
Anything you can do that’s simple, but might provide an extra variable to your day to spice things up. Note: this shouldn’t be the same thing every day.
2. CHALLENGE YOURSELF MORE—
If you find yourself bored by your work, try challenging yourself more. This could mean setting goals for yourself that go a bit beyond what you’ve been doing.
For example, if you’ve been writing 500 words per day, see if you can beat your own word count every day for the next week. If you’ve been writing mainly fluff pieces, switch it up and do an angst piece. See if you can write a book in a month, or start a blog where you don’t write fiction at all!
Anything you can do to add a little kick to your workload. Note: Beware of challenging yourself too much! This can lead straight back into burnout.
3. CHALLENGE YOURSELF LESS—
If you’re on the flip side of that coin, and find that you are anxious, procrastinating, and perfectionistic when it comes to writing, fret not. Just because you’re experiencing any of these things, doesn’t mean you’re incapable of doing the job with your skillset.
It just means your perception of the job needs to be shifted.
Procrastination, at its heart, is a fear of failure, which results in actively avoiding the negative emotions associated with the task that causes this fear. Perfectionism is a type of procrastination that is a combination of a fear of failure and a fear of success (or, more accurately, other’s critiques of your success) all at once.
Neither have anything to do with your actual skillset, but they have everything to do with your perception of your skillset. Obviously, this is a harder thing to fix, as it has to do with deeply ingrained levels of self-esteem.
What I can offer you is a tactic to trick your mind into thinking you’re capable.
If you have a task, big or small, and you are feeling overwhelmed by it (like you might go curl up in bed and scroll Tumblr), immediately break that task up into smaller tasks. Keep breaking up the smaller tasks until you have the smallest possible part of the bigger task without doing nothing.
Then do that smallest possible thing.
If your goal is to write a 2000 word one shot, a small part of that task is writing half of it. An even smaller part of that task is breaking the one shot up into “scenes” and writing one scene. For instance:
Jude wakes up to a sore throat, a runny nose, and a fever.
She tries to go to work, but Cardan, being the mother hen that he is, threatens to never make her another grilled cheese sandwich (her favourite food) ever again if she doesn’t stay home.
Jude agrees begrudgingly, and Cardan sits her down in front of the TV with a bottle of Gatorade. He leaves to go get medicine from the store.
When Cardan comes back, Jude is worse than before. He makes her soup and saltine crackers and spoon feeds her.
She complains the whole time and, in her feverish state, threatens to never buy him another bottle of wine (his favourite food) ever again if he doesn’t let her feed herself.
Each bullet point represents one “scene” of about 200-400 words each. Obviously, there will be more details that you work out as you write. But with these five smaller scenes, your goal is no longer writing the 2000 word one shot. Your goal is writing the first of the five scenes.
If you complete the smallest possible task, you can stop, and you’ll still feel like you’ve accomplished something because you can cross off that task from your list. But chances are, by the time you cross off one task, you may have inspiration enough to keep going.
4. ENGAGE IN ACTIVE STIMULATION—
Since active stimulation has been proven to turn on the creative “tap”, try incorporating more of these activities into your daily routine:
Exercise: As the resident couch potato, I hate to say that exercising is good for creativity, but it is. Even if it’s just going on a short walk, so long as you’re moving.
Reading: Sometimes you have plenty of ideas, but no words to fit those ideas. Fill your well of words by carving out an hour or two each day for reading a good book.
The Creative Process: In the writing world, the creative process is a process of about 20-30 minutes that the writer partakes in every day before they start writing. This process should be creative, but also have nothing to do with writing. You can try colouring in a colouring book, painting, organising a page in your bullet journal. Anything that is creative but does not make you think about everything you have to do that day. Think of it as creative meditation.
Listen to music: Having APD, I personally can’t listen to music while I write. However, studies have shown that if you listen to at least ten songs per day, it will significantly benefit your dopamine levels and overall mood. If you’re like me and prefer to work in silence, maybe stick on a couple songs during your creative process. If you can manage music and writing together, get out those headphones!
5. KEEP A REGULAR SCHEDULE—
I know this is the most cliche point in the book, but it’s valid. This doesn’t mean do the same thing at the same time every day over and over, because ultimately we’re looking to avoid monotony.
But having pillars of structure to bolster the excitement can definitely work to keep you from slipping into burnout. Going to sleep, waking up, and having your meals at relatively the same time every day are good examples of this.
Feel free to change up the things you do between breakfast and lunch, but make sure you have those pillars of consistency so your brain knows that a break is on the horizon and doesn’t get tired.
6. PACE YOURSELF—
This is particularly difficult for those of us who are coming out of a creative burnout, but I urge you to pay special attention to this one. If we are suddenly hit by inspiration and the writing is flowing and flowing and flowing, eventually we will hit the point of highest dopamine capacity for writing.
Not putting a check on the flood of inspiration coming out of a creative burnout, I’d argue, is actually a guarantee that many of us will experience burnout all over again. It becomes this vicious cycle in which we are trapped.
While it feels great to write non-stop and receive immediate validation for that work, try to limit yourself to how much you’re writing and how immediately you post your writing (if you plan on posting it).
Whenever I finish a one shot or a chapter of something, I like to allow at least one day for editing before I post. This timeframe is important, because it acts as a buffer of rest between writing marathons.
You can take however long you need for the editing process, but definitely make sure you have a set amount of time in place. Otherwise, your brain might not have enough time to come down from what is essentially a writing high, and you will always need to reach greater heights in order to achieve that same level of dopamine.
~~~~
Overall, the most important things to take away from all of this are:
Change up your environment
Keep your brain actively stimulated
Have pillars of structure between which you can run about chaotically to your heart’s content
PACE YOURSELF!
Hope this helped. Happy writing!
-Em 🖤🗡
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#this one was a spiritual one y'all#thanks for the ask babes!#writing#writing tips#writing advice#writeblr#writing tip masterlist#writer#writer's desk#writer's life#writer's problems#writer's block#ao3#fanfiction#creative burnout#asked and answered#em answers#danaanruhn#thank you for 2k!! 🥳💜
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