#bcs If he didn’t he probably would’ve stabbed himself in the heart

[starrysymphonies]

I finished Trials of Apollo and I’m still not over it

[reveniemus]

8 or 21 or 31 for the hug prompts. love your new look 😉💖

thank you!! i am obsessed with this photoshoot 😭😭 also i hope you enjoy some angst i guess?? bc i write that now???

geraskier in angst major, no. 1

pairing: gen with lite!geraskier rating: teen warnings: implied torture, mild descriptions of injuries jaskier is not having a good time

on ao3

Never say never, his mother had always said, and yet, Jaskier had foolishly done just that. He thought he was never going to feel anything worse than the heartache of what happened on the mountain, and yet, this moment was a very strong contender. It was such an obvious thing too, and Jaskier knew if Geralt had been there, he would’ve tutted at him for being so oblivious to the fact that the men giving him the eye were not, in fact, looking for a one night tumble.

Then again, if Geralt had been there, Jaskier wouldn’t have been flouncing about in a crowded tavern in plain view of some Nilfgaardian soldiers out of uniform. He would’ve been curled up in a bedroll on the forest floor, eating rabbit or deer and scribbling in his notebook while Geralt sharpened his swords.

“Bard’s tougher than he looks, huh?” he hears one of the guards say after he’s taken yet another beating. “That’s the third one today and he’s still conscious, somehow.”

“Barely. I bet if he got another one today, he’d tell us everything,” his companion says, and Jaskier’s body involuntarily winces at the thought of another beating so soon to his last one.

“Think the captain will let us? It’s not like we’re getting anywhere with the other prisoners,” the first one says, and he must lean against the bars because the scraping sound of metal against metal rings in Jaskier’s ears.

“Most likely. We haven’t tried branding yet,” the second voice answers, the gleeful tone to his voice making Jaskier’s stomach curl. Thankfully, it sounds like they’re finally, finally walking away and Jaskier lets himself relax when the sounds of their conversation dissipate.

He takes a deep breath and even that small, miniscule amount of movement makes his body ache. Jaskier tries to remember the things Geralt used to say about managing pain. The first step was to take inventory of his body to figure out what was wrong. It’s hard to do on his side, so Jaskier shifts, his face scrunching up as he lays on his back. It isn’t comfortable and the movement makes his bones feel like they’re on fire. How is it possible to feel this much pain and survive?

Okay, he can do this. He can take inventory of his body, just like Geralt used to.

Deep breath.

Something aches on his calf, near his ankle. Twisting it shoots pain up his leg, and Jasker bites down on his bottom lip to stop from making a noise. He can’t let the soldiers know he’s conscious enough to make noise.

Deep breath.

There’s a cut on his right upper thigh. He doesn’t know when he acquired it. This last beating? The one before? It’s not actively bleeding anymore, which is good. He thinks it means they didn’t hit anything major.

Deep breath.

A stabbing pain shoots up his left arm. Fuck. He hopes it’s not a break, because the implications of it makes his heart ache. Then again, he doesn’t know when he’ll see his lute again, so maybe it doesn’t really matter.

Deep breath.

His abdomen feels heavy. Is this what internal bleeding feels like? He should’ve asked Geralt how to know if you’re bleeding internally. Jaskier thinks he’d be colder if he were bleeding internally, or number.

Deep breath.

Jaskier’s head is pounding — not enough to distract from the rest of his pain, but just enough that his thoughts are verging on disjointed. Geralt would yell at him for not being able to focus.

Deep breath.

That definitely means there’s a head injury though. Jaskier remembers when Geralt had fought two fiends and they’d knocked him around. He had insisted that Jaskier not let him sleep, that it would make a head injury worse. Jaskier isn’t sure what worse means when the main part of your body that keeps things running is already hurt, but he thinks it means he shouldn’t sleep.

Deep breath.

If he’s asleep, though, he won’t feel the pain of his injuries. Jaskier closes his eyes, knowing Geralt would hit him for genuinely contemplating falling asleep while he’s got a definitive head injury.

Deep — Jaskier is jolted out of his breathing routine by a loud clanging noise, followed by thumps and screams and the sound of running. He pushes himself up onto his elbows, grimacing with the motion, to peer past the bars of his cell.

He should move back, maybe hide in the shadows and hope that whoever is attacking the prison will leave him alone. If he can have time to heal, he can get out of here and find … who? Geralt made it very clear he didn’t want Jaskier around, and it wasn’t like Jaskier could go around and find his old acquaintances. Anyone who was associated with him could be in danger because of his association with the White Wolf.

Maybe he could turn this prison into his home after whoever is out there finishes off the Nilfgaardians. Jaskier lays back down, closing his eyes and taking deep, slow breaths as the noises of fighting seem to get closer. If he lies here, maybe they’ll think this cell is empty of viable prisoners and they’ll keep going.

“Fuck,” he hears a voice grunt before the door to his cell opens. The voice seems familiar, but Jaskier can feel himself slipping in and out of consciousness and his already-vaguely-disjointed thoughts connect even less and less. “Please don’t be dead,” the voice says, and Jaskier vaguely feels a warm body next to him. The immediacy of the movement makes him flinch, and he hears another curse from the voice.

Familiarity blooms inside him, and he winces. His mind is playing tricks on him, it seems, maybe the Nilfgaardians decided an illusion would be more useful than a branding. Jaskier tries to curl into himself, but the pain that courses through him makes him scream.

“Jaskier, please, don’t move,” the voice whispers, gruff and gentle, and Jaskier whimpers as a hand brushes back his hair.

“Please, I don’t know anything, I swear,” he pleads, fighting back tears.

“It’s okay, Jask, you’re safe,” the voice murmurs, and Jaskier whines. The illusion feels so real it makes his heart ache, reminds him of the moments he clung to when Geralt’s fingers would barely brush over his skin when they were making camp, or when Jaskier made a stupid decision that got him hurt.

Suddenly, Jaskier is being tugged up, and he’s shocked into looking up. His eyes widen when he sees a shock of long white hair and amber eyes, a soft whisper escaping his lips.

“Yes, it’s me. We have to keep moving,” Geralt says, and Jaskier feels arms on his waist as he somehow gets on his feet. “Can you stand?” he asks, his eyes glittering with concern in a way that makes Jaskier’s head spin.

“You’re here,” he whispers, leaning back a little as Geralt’s hand moves from his waist. It’s not far, he can feel the heat of it against the ragged remains of his chemise, and Jaskier feels more light headed than he has in weeks.

“Careful,” the witcher murmurs, catching Jaskier’s arm as he sways on the spot. “I’ve got you, Julek.” His arm wraps around Jaskier’s waist and he brings him closer.

Jaskier inhales Geralt’s scent, a mix of leather and horse that’s difficult to duplicate, much less recreate in an illusion, and ignoring the sharp ache in his lungs at the movement. He’s probably got a broken rib, he realizes, as he involuntarily leans into Geralt more. “You’re here,” he repeats, his eyes fluttering.

“I am, but don’t fall asleep on me yet. You’ve got a nasty head wound,” Geralt says, his voice gruff and stern and the familiar tendrils of it makes Jaskier’s heart warm.

“Y’know, even if this was a dream, it’s a nice dream. I hoped this would be my last,” Jaskier whispers, like it’s a secret, as he leans into Geralt, wrapping an arm around the witcher’s waist. He has no balance, so he feels the sway of his body as he tries to recalibrate his center of gravity.

“It’s not a dream, and it sure as hell won’t be your last one.” Geralt’s response is angry, almost aggressive, and Jaskier thinks maybe he’s far too out of it to be affected by that. “Yen’s outside with a portal waiting for me to get you out of here,” he continues, tightening his grip around Jaskier’s waist and moving out of the cell.

Jaskier makes a soft noise, burying his face in Geralt’s neck as the witcher half-carries him out of the keep. “You came for me,” he mumbles, voice slurring as darkness starts to take a hold of his consciousness.

“I always will,” Geralt whispers. Or maybe it’s just a part of Jaskier’s dream. “You’re not dreaming, Jaskier, and I need you to stay awake.”

Did he say that aloud? Oh. Did that mean he was definitely dreaming or definitely not? Jaskier is about to say something else, he thinks, but putting words together has become very difficult. What a useless wordsmith he is, isn’t he? Not able to put words together! What a sorry excuse of a bard.

“What’s he babbling about?” a sultry feminine voice asks, and Jaskier’s body jerks, the pain shooting from his possibly-twisted ankle as he tries to run off. “Bard, what are you doing? Has he been doing this the whole time?”

“Hm,” Geralt grunts, shifting to hoist Jaskier towards the shimmering portal that’s just outside of his fuzzy eyeline.

“Why didn’t you Axii him like one of your horses?” Yennefer asks, her voice coming closer as Jaskier’s arm lifts and loops over someone’s neck. A lilac and gooseberries someone.

Geralt lets out a grunt that, if he were in the right state of mind, Jaskier would be able to translate, but for now, he knows there’s an underlying layer of softness to it that he wants to hold close to his heart.

“Oh, you stupid witcher,” Yennefer mumbles before Jaskier feels chaos surrounding him. It’s the last thing he consciously notes for himself before his vision goes black and his mind goes empty.

[noritoshiikamo]

game over

pairing: noritoshi kamo + fem!oc genre: angst tags//warning: established relationship, wild gojo appeared // blood, character death, emotion distress, mention of shibuya  note: the obligatory trio of mine: not well edited, lowercase intended, english isnt my first language im sorry if i murder it. note that i put descriptions of the characters i write so it would be easier for me, you’re free to imagine the character the way you seem fits! okay listen imma be honest i dont like this part that much dhhdbdjksncjddiem and im sorry if it sucks bcs istg i cant compete to part 1 and 2 of it so IM SORRY tagging @unabashednightmarepizza @sassyeahhhh @dok-ja @sukirichi [bold means i cant tag u idky :( lemme know if wanna be tagged in the next part] read the first part | second part | third part | bonus

few years ago;

“you’re fucking ridiculous!”

“you’re injured, how the fuck is it me that’s being unreasonable?”

she contemplated stabbing him straight to his chest. “i’m fine, leave me alone,” she hissed, holding on to her arm as she tried to limp away. second year jujutsu student noritoshi kamo wondered how the hell one could be this stubborn. with blood caked up on the side of her face, lips busted and bruising in the corner, not to mention the broken arm and probably twisted ankle, he could not understand how one could be this reckless and stupid, it’s almost ridiculous.

but here she is standing in front of him.

“you could’ve let me handle it,” he said, coldly.

she never turned that fast in her life; her limping leg suddenly worked fine as she hauled her ass, throwing both fists to his chest. the force put was enough to threw him back a few steps, he caught her wrists holding her from falling down. “stop acting like i’m so fragile. i can exorcist the curse just fine. you make me hate you so much,” she spitted, pure rage etched on her face, “just because i’m a girl, because i’m your girl, i’m weak. please, i am as good as you are, kamo.”

their faces were so close, he could count the freckles spread on her nose and cheeks. he loves her eyes the very first time he caught glimpse of it; one is a dull brown while the other looks like it carries the secret of the bright blue sea. this time, the eyes he loves looked hopeless, lack of the burning spirit she carried with tears threatening to spill. letting go of a wrist, his trembling hand brushed the hair coated with the blood back, carefully not to hurt her. “i never said you are bad,” he clarified, fingers busy brushing the hair back. his sudden reaction surprised her, and her body betrayed her thoughts as she eased in his arms.

he tilted her chin, his head was panicking as he realised that his brain was no longer controlling his movement as he leaned down and kissed her.

she tasted like blood.

she winced, pain aching on the swollen part and he apologized so quietly as he deepened the kiss. “nori-” her voice croaked as she swallowed his moans. he hummed, satisfied by the kiss. their foreheads rest against each other, the tip of their noses touched as they struggled to catch breath.

“stop being stupid. let me help you okay?”

“okay.”

slipping his arm under hers, he helped her walk, leading them out of the abandoned building they managed to exorcist. nothing major, a couple of pestering level three and four curses that them both handled well but their supervisor missed to tell them about the hiding level two curse that took them by surprise. she had become the curse’s main target.

if she would’ve just listened to him and stay close. he sighed.

“ouch, ouch,” she cried, clutching on her left leg, forcing him to stop. impatient, he slipped his hand under her knees, lifting her up in his arms. she apologized profusely, embarrassed to be such a burden to him. he brushed it off immediately.

“did you call them? told them that we are done?”

she gasped, “wait, i thought they’ll wait for us.”

he huffed, “you’re not that important, y/n. give them a call, please. i want to go home.”

kicking the door open, the moonlight shone on them as he carried her down to the bottom stairs. settling her down on the steps, he sat beside her, letting a long sigh. he watched as she took the call, letting them know that she was slightly injured, and they need to go back asap. she was visibly tired, and he was the same too.

he couldn’t help but to sigh at the way the moonlight enveloped her. he had loved her from the very first moment he caught his eyes on her; she caught him staring, called him out publicly and ignored all his advances. it took him a lot to court her. she’s a gojo, she can have anything and everything with the sky is the limit.

but one thing money could never buy is affection.

it started with little stuffs; noritoshi waiting for her with her lunch readied every day. it annoyed her but momo (who was secretly rooting for him) forced her to just do it. “it’s just a lunch,” momo said sheepishly. noritoshi would have them paired all the time for the missions. she’d accepted it with open heart. noritoshi would also teach her how to weld a bow and shoot arrows. she promised that she would go out on date with him if he taught her.

by the end of their first year, they became inseparable.

the idea of being apart from her hurts him physically and mentally. she took a sharp breath when he laced his fingers between her own, quickly telling the other person on the phone that she was okay. “it was just noritoshi,” she replied with a small laugh. their hands fit each other; his skin contrasted her slightly tanned skin. while his hands were rough from welding the bow and he kept his nail short and clean, hers were slightly softer with her nails painted prettily. this month she had her nails painted in pastel. all the girls’ day out with momo and mai had proven its importance. he was happy to provide her with his black card despite her discontent.

“analysing my hands now?”

he smiled slightly, “it looks very pretty. i guess i got my money worth. are they coming?”

she leaned on his shoulder, his own wrapped around her as she closed her eyes, “they are around the corner. i would definitely need another round this week,” she teased. kissing her forehead gently, he didn’t mind that his uniform was stained with her blood; he was glad that she’s safe.

“i’ll happily take you there.”

few years later;

noritoshi kamo almost lost his mind. the stadium was half destroyed, huge craters on the pitch with the sight of his wife nowhere to be found. he looked up to the black pitch curtain encasing the stadium area from the sky, a curse escaped his lips.

“where the fuck are you?” he grunted, scanning the area.

she is gone, his stubborn little wife. she could’ve just wait but annoyed that their dinner date was interrupted and eager because this was their first mission together as a married couple; she escaped his supervision. as they were dealing with minor curses outside, she decided to head on forward, leaving him to deal with whatever is left. he beat himself inside for letting her come, he could easily do this himself and send her home safely, but she blinked her eyes and he was weak. she always has her way with him.

his step stopped when he realised there was a shadow ahead.

“she’s pretty,” the thing said.

his blood ran cold, “what did you do to my wife?”

the curse let out a laugh. it was sinister enough to send chills down his spine. especially when he realised the head it was stepping on was his wife. her eyes were fluttering back and forth, struggling to stay awake. a howl shocked him, shivers down his spine at the painful whimpers her shikigami making. cursed spirits were devouring it alive, overwhelming it and chewing every part of its body. his wife was too weak to dispel the shikigami; it’s dangerous as the devoured wolf shikigami will drain her cursed energy by a second.

all shikigami linked directly to the owner; everything inflected to the wolf, she could feel it too.

he needed a plan.

hidden in his wedding ring was a retractable knife. he rarely carries blood bags anymore as his power solidified itself. the older he got, the better he was at using and controlling a small steady flow of his own blood straight from the tap. with a clap of his hands, the knife cut his hand enough to send blood shooting like bullets. the blood hit the curses straight to its cores, died out instantly on impact, but the shikigami was beyond salvageable. it let out one last howl, one last goodbye before dropping to the ground, half of his snout gone. she will be devastated, it’s her only shikigami she managed to tame at such a young age, but at least it has stopped the shikigami from stripping his wife’s cursed energy to its core.

the fire burning in his eyes only made the curse laughed. he kicked her body away, spurting blood out of her mouth. she was halfway close to death’s doorstep.

“i will fucking murder you,” he hissed.

“my blood is my power. it’s supposed to rot human, stripping its meat from the bone like acid. however,” the curse nudged her body, “your wife didn’t. humour me, did your blood tainted hers? tell me, i’m curious how.”

“are you going to chit chat because i don’t have whole day.” his blood dripped on the pitch.

the curse grinned, shrugging his shoulder. he kneeled, running his bloody fingers on her cheeks leaving trails of flowers pattern that dissipated immediately, “i’m not here to fight. i’m here to serve a warning,” he looked up to the tensed sorcerer, “for gojo satoru. tell him, we’ll be waiting for him in shibuya.” noritoshi’s face scrunched in confusion.

“we have no business with the gojos.”

“but she is. she could change her name, married you, but it doesn’t erase the fact that she carried gojo’s blood in her vein. she’s the bridge to your two clans. i’m just killing two birds with one stone. ruin the kamo clan’s relationship with gojos and hurt gojo satoru. all thanks to her,” the curse turned his back on him, his laugh echoed as he walked away. the dark curtain disappeared slowly as the ground rumbled. a perfect chance for noritoshi to strike if it wasn’t because of the cursed spirit’s words gluing him to his spot, “oh, kamo, i believe a congratulation is overdue. let me know when’s the baby is due, i would love to drop by personally.”

the pillar holding on to the roof collapsed sending wave of dust all over the place. noritoshi covered his face, coughing as he sucked some in, removing his coat as a shield. the cursed spirit was no where to be found.

“the place is going to collapse! i’ll get the curse, you go get her!”

a voice echoed and he caught a glimpse of blond hair running past him and noritoshi didn’t think twice as he sprinted around the cracks and holes. who was that voice or who was the curse, he couldn’t give a single fuck, he just wants his wife back. he was shaking when he got to her, arms immediately scooped her up in his arms. her chest was raising slowly, blood dripping on the side of her lips as she struggled to exhale.

“you’re going to be okay,”

he told her, but he wasn’t sure if he will ever be.

-

“can you turn down the stupid light, it’s hurting my eyes.”

the voice laughed melodiously, the light moved to the other eye repeating the same thing.

“as you can see, she’s awake, slightly weak, but she should be okay.”

another voice interrupted, “are you sure?” she gasped, excited to hear a familiar voice. “nori?” she called out, unable to open her eyes, relying strictly to her hearing as she reached her shaky hands out for him. “her senses might be slightly off, just let her do it herself,” the woman’s voice noted, and she felt annoyed. how dare you underestimate me, her mind scoffed.

“my senses are fine. see?” she claimed as she held noritoshi’s hand up. he smiled, gently rubbing her hand with encouragement. “thanks, shoko, we are fine.”

“i’ll leave you be then. call me if you need anything.”

she listened to the clacking of shoko’s heels, followed by the door opening and slamming shut. she jumped, but he held her hand tighter, reassuring her that it’s alright. “so why can’t i see?” she asked, confident that they are alone now. she felt the bed sunk a little on the left side, “you were high on anesthesia, i’m surprise you could even move your jaw to speak.” she felt a finger brushed her hair aside, breath loomed on her face and she could feel her own face reddening up.

“are you going to kiss me or are you just going to tease me?” his heart swell up, despite her shaky voice almost made him laugh.

“do you trust me?” his hand cupped her cheek gently.

she nodded eagerly, “always.”

“good.”

his kiss hit her like a waft of fresh air. every kiss felt like a first kiss to her that she couldn’t help to react so eagerly to it. his tongue slipped through her defense, overwhelming her taste buds with such strong taste of iron. it didn’t stop her. she knew what he was doing from start. he peeked a little, didn’t stop a second from kissing her as he watched his blood marking appeared on her face. her hands went up around her neck pulling him closer and he obeyed, deepening the kiss.

heal; his mind commanded.

after a while, she pulled back, being the one to break apart from the kiss first, her chest raising up and down as she struggled to catch her breath. her eyes were wide open now, fluttering lazily as she leaned back on the propped-up pillow. he wiped the corner of his lips, eyes on her as he watched the open wound on her face and arms slowly closed leaving the fresh healed red marks behind. he relaxed when he heard a thank you coming from her, as she checked her healed arms.

“i’m disappointed with you,” he finally broke the silence.

“really?” she frowned. he always does this thing where he will immediately go into lecture mood every time she does something that pisses him off. it’s almost like a game to her as she waited for him to explode, “right now? not even going to wait until i’m discharged. this is a new record, toshi. like shoko said, i’m fine.” he shook his head, “it doesn’t make it right. you always disobeyed me. ignored my orders, going about with your goddamn big head, you could’ve been killed.”

she rolled her eyes, noritoshi is being noritoshi, what a drama queen, she mentally rolled her eyes, “but i’m not,” she pushed her hair back, twisting it easily into a simple loose knot, “i told you, i am not weak.”

“your shikigami was destroyed, your blood was poisoned, 70 percent was already circulating to every part of your vein, i had to beg for the higher up to help purify your blood,” her smile died down. this game no longer feels fun for her. noritoshi was really mad this time. “you think it’s fun and all game but game over, y/n. you need to stop doing this. if you can’t do it for me, do it for yourself.”

“leave me alone, nori, if you just going to nag, please i don’t want to hear it. i’m tired.”

it made him angry that she was taking his word lightly. running his hand in his messy hair, he felt like hauling his head to the wall.

“you don’t understand-”

she slammed her hand on the bed, interrupting his words, “no YOU don’t understand me, i’m tired of you babying me. i’m an adult, i am your wife, stop treating me like a fucking child! we have been married for months, but god you’re suffocating me.”

“i will when you stop endangering yourself. i will stop treating your like a child when you stop acting like one. you’re pregnant, for the love of god!” he threw his hand on the wall. the wall cracked from the force. “i’m what?” she felt the world stopped spinning. she was hundred percent sure that her ears and head were deceiving her. he removed his hand from the hole he made on the wall, his body shaking from the amount of anger building up.

“noritoshi, answer me! what do you mean- i’m not pregnant, i had my period this month.”

“you are,” he shrugged. he felt something hit him in the back; looking down he saw the fluffy white pillow sitting by his feet.

he pointed to the bedside table where a sonogram perched up against a tissue box. she was about to lose her mind. “this is not funny, if this is your mean way of fucking me up because i won’t listen to you then this is just fucking cruel.”

he marched towards him, his hand went down on his chin, forcing her eyes on him, “until you stop playing your stupid games, until you stop treating your life like it’s nothing, until you consider my feelings and my worries, as your husband is valid, i do not exist in your life,” tears fell down her cheeks, “like you, i’m tired too.

“nori i-“

he left her before she could say a word. she broke into sob; her chest was pounding so hard that the blood pressure monitor was beeping. the door burst opened but it was not the face she wanted to see. she was immediately hysterical. satoru managed to hold her wrist down before she ripped the tubes and needles off her arms. “no, no, i want nori. where is he!” she screamed as satoru held her down. “you need to calm down, it’s not good for the baby,” satoru cooed, but she was not having it. he turned to shoko, “her cursed energy is skyrocketing, she’s going hysterical, do something!”

“let me go!”

shoko held out a syringe, “hold her down.”

she screamed, thrashing so rough that she almost slipped out of the strongest sorcerer’s hands. she managed to get a needle out before she felt another sharp pain on her back. shoko pulled the empty needle out and they retreated away as she fell on her butt backward. she was reduced to a babbling mess, her eyes drooped as she struggled to fight the waves of sleepiness hitting her one after another.

“tell him i’m sorry,” she croaked out, before everything turned completely dark.

the blood pressure monitor returned back to normal.

three days later;

“are you still going to ignore her? it’s been 3 days.”

“she needs to learn her place.”

gojo satoru disagreed. he eyed the head of the clan, shaking his head before standing up. he thought he could convince noritoshi kamo to visit his wife, but the man was as stubborn as- huh, her.

“i think she have learned enough, she’s miserable. you’re miserable.”

the man glared at the blonde man child, raising the cup of tea up for a sip. the tea doesn’t taste as good as the way she made it. he left her for 3 days and he found himself struggling to do everything alone. 

he, noritoshi kamo, 23 years old and the head of the kamo family, could not make a cup of fucking tea.

she always said that the best way to make tea depends on how long you let it steep. “too early and you won’t get the right amount of flavour,” she explained, her back facing him as he watched from the counter as she loomed over the stove, “but if you steep it way too long you going to burn the tea leaves and it will make everything taste bitter.” she turned around, a huge smile on her face that made his heart skipped a beat.

he frowned; the tea tasted bitter.

“she’s pregnant, she’s supposed to be crazy. you are supposed to be the wise one. she is going to carry your child for 9 long months, i can’t explain to you how long that’s going to be but she is allowed to be crazy.”

he dropped the cup on the floor when gojo’s hand grabbed him by his collar, pulling him up from his chair.

“now please, see your goddamn wife before i deck you in the mouth.”

“i will.”

satisfied with his answer, gojo’s demeanor changed and he was again the man child they all know of him. noritoshi could no longer focus on the report in front of him; not when his mind is full of her and only her.

would she forgive him? he wasn’t sure.

but he would spend his lifetime making up to her and the baby if that’s necessary.

[fvrxdrm]

Last Night (Leon Kennedy x Reader)

Pairing: Infinite Darkness!Leon x GN!Reader

Warning(s): Implied sex

This is about a dream I had a few nights ago. I added a few things at the end bc the ending in my dream didn’t make sense but I’ll explain it later at the end notes.

*****

“Ugh! She’s a fucking headache!”

The coolness of the air conditioning in the briefing room dried up the remaining sweat on your back and forehead and your hands went disgustingly sticky with the clamminess clinging into your palm. Fatigued and dozy you were, you were sure you were going to pass out right there in your seat.

You, along with your partner, Leon, were tasked to save Ashley Graham again, this time in a more urban part of Italy. When the president told you about her getting kidnapped again, you legit rolled your eyes and Leon nudged your side when he saw the subtle gesture you displayed. Had Leon had the audacity to disrespect people who had higher power than him in his line of work, he would’ve flipped the president off and took the both of you to a nearby bar. He wasn’t like that though, much to your dismay. He still had that “mama’s boy” attitude in him even when he left some of it during his “rookie day” or night or something.

You were close to rioting that time. They were going to send you to that fucking mission again with only the two of you and hand you both shitty-ass pistols with ten fucking bullets. Who the fuck does that? Wouldn’t you send the whole team if you, the president of the United fucking States, had a daughter that’s been kidnapped? Also, why the fuck didn’t they enhance the fucking security level? Hello? Parenting 101?

Leon crashed onto the couch beside you, making you bounce a bit, before shaking his hair from the grease and dampness his locks held. “Agreed. I might’ve lost my ears right there…again,” he grunted as he stretched his arms above his head and managed to pop a few joints in the process. “Wanna grab a few drinks after this?”

With your head leaned against the back of the couch, you turned to look at your friend with jaded eyes and a lazy smile. You nodded in response and slapped a hand on his thigh. “Sure.”

*****

You may or may not have had one too many drinks and danced around like a fucking worm on crack. Leon had one of his arms wrapped around your waist and a glass of whiskey in his free hand as he ground against your skirt-clad ass while you responded back with the same enthusiasm as him. Both of you were drunk, that’s for sure. Not only with pure intoxication, but also with a sinful desire; something you two unknowingly shared on nights where fingers worked their magic to bring you both to a blissful high. You knew they weren’t enough to satisfy your wants, but they were enough to calm your racing thoughts temporarily instead of committing to a one-time thing and bringing awkwardness in the atmosphere, at least you thought it would’ve been a one-time thing.

Leon whispered naughty things into your ear, things he wouldn’t have said had he been conscious enough to stop himself from making a move, and boldly dipped a finger in your skirt and rubbed your pussy through your underwear. He was going to make love to you, he said, and he would make sure that you would be his. You bit your lip as you moaned at his words. He was hot and you would gladly let him fuck you anytime, anywhere. And so, you agreed.

*****

Ring. Ring. Ring.

The provoking sound of your phone pulled you away from your dream. Your fantasy was so close to getting to the good part. Leon was about to fucking kiss you and then somebody decided to fucking wake you up! You sighed. If somebody woke you up this early then you guessed it was really important. So, despite being piqued and groggy from the sudden sound, you picked your phone up from the night stand beside your bed, not even thinking about how different your room looked, and checked the time before answering the call. “Hello?” You spoke, your voice raspy and your throat feeling like a thousand knives were stabbed into it. You also took note of how your head felt like you were banging it against the wall with so much speed and vigor and attempted to ease it down with a simple massage but to no avail.

“Morning, Y/N!”, the voice from the other line boomed, causing your agonizing condition to aggravate even more.

Ashley

You groaned at the contrasting enthusiasm the girl had and you had to slam the phone on the mattress to ground yourself and keep you from dying. “Can you keep your voice down? I have a headache right now and it would be much appreciated if you could calm down,” you said after bringing your device back to your ear.

“Oh, sorry. I was just going to ask if you could meet me in the church later? I wanted to talk to you about something while we get everything set for my wedding tomorrow. I tried calling Leon, but he wouldn’t answer. Can you do me a favor of telling him about it too?”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll call him.”

“Thanks, Y/N! I’ll see you later,” she said. The call ended with a series of beeps and you slammed your phone on the bed again with your eyes shut tight in irritation.

I cannot deal with that girl again. Especially now that I’m hungover… But who am I to deny the president’s fucking daughter…?

You sighed.

Welp, time to call Leon.

You raised your phone up parallel to your face and was about to press Leon’s saved contact name when you suddenly felt an arm wrap around your torso. Your heart pounded. With eyes opened wide and brain waking up from its slumber in an instant, you slowly turned your head towards your left and almost screamed at what you saw…or rather who you saw.

Leon.

His chest was exposed to the warmth of the morning air, hair strands clamped together by oil and sweat that was starting to form on his skin. He was still deep in his slumber and you noticed how the round bulge tucked in his eyelids moved around as if he was exploring something in his dream.

Never had you and Leon shared a bed together. Those times where he would come over to your place for a drink? He would always insist that he could just crash into your couch in order to avoid invading your privacy.

You panicked at the situation you were in. You grabbed the hem of your blanket and yanked it up to check if anything did happen, and surprise, surprise; something did. You were both naked and you felt something drying up down there. You also started taking notice of how your vagina felt sore from probably getting pounded and fucked silly last night-

Oh, right! Last night.

You vaguely remembered how Leon touched your body while you two were getting drunk. You two were getting a bit too flirty and began groping each other here and there, getting more and more suggestive as minutes passed, pie-eyed and unconscious with how you were treating each other as more than friends.

Every corner and every wall your eyes passed was becoming a void of something dark, something you became anxious of. What happened would forever change your friendship and your relationship with him for sure. Hell, you weren’t even sure if he was going to stay by your side starting from when he wakes up in a few minutes. And as much as you wanted to go back and prevent that from happening, you couldn’t, and you had to face the music whether you liked or not.

*****

Sure enough, when you woke Leon up, everything was awkward. No words were exchange from when you prepared for the day, breakfast, and until Leon drove you both to the location Ashley had told you to go to. The silence rose hysteria in both of your minds. You were going fucking crazy. You were fidgety when you sat beside Leon in the passenger seat and the man would bounce his leg up and down when you hit a red light. You both were trying to avoid taking a glance at each other, but those inevitable moments that you did, you would forcefully smile at each other and then gaze back out the window again. That was the cycle you lived on for a few hours and you decided to let it stay like that until one of you broke the atmosphere.

You waited inside the church as you were told. It was only the two of you inside but you acted like a handful of people were sitting beside you with the amount of space that was left unfilled between you. You were biting your lip and focusing on the pillars and stones that made up the building until you couldn’t process anything that was happening anymore and stood up, studying the interior as you roamed. “Hey,” you heard somebody whisper behind you. You looked down to your wrist when you felt something warm and saw a fairly large hand loosely gripping onto it before looking up to see Leon’s eyes gazing into yours. You nearly got lost in them but thankfully, he spoke before you got stuck into your own stupor. “I just wanna say… I’m sorry. I-it’s not gonna change everything that happened but I don’t want to break what we have. I value you and our friendship too much for me to let it go. I don’t think we can forget about last night but if it makes you feel better…I-I-“

“Can we talk about this outside? I don’t think it’s appropriate for us to talk about it here,” you chuckled. Leon nodded in agreement before leading you out to where a garden caught your attention. “Listen Leon, I know we can’t just pretend nothing happened but… I don’t wanna let go of this either. I value this as much as you do and it would be crazy stupid for me just to just hate you for something we weren’t even conscious about or something,” you said. You both laughed in relief as the weight on your shoulders dissipated into thin air before you placed a gentle palm on his cheek. Again, no words were shared but this time, no anxiety was present. Instead, you felt like this was an intimate moment only the two of you shared. Something was being written in the stars and you saw every word the gods wrote in the eyes of the person in front of you both.

As cheesy as it sounded, you two felt like magnets were pulling you towards each other, physically and mentally, and in a matter of seconds, you found your lips being pressed against Leon’s.

It was like you were recreating what happened last night without even knowing the details, except this was slower, more sensual, and certainly more emotional, and you couldn’t help the tears that flowed freely against your cheeks.

“Come on, let’s ditch Ashley. Maybe we could relive what happened last night?”

*****

Okay, so in my dream, Ashley’s not getting married and she didn’t call me. Instead, what happened was after the bar scene, Leon and I got teleported in front of the altar and just fucking talked. And then we walked outside and what happened in the end of this fic happened in my dream. Lol.

I rushed this bc I’m tired.

[puppy-phum]

some heihua for the soul

so the update for Binding isn’t happening today bc my brain is complete mush after trying to aggressively finish my thesis yesterday and i decided to give my brain two days off bc of that. also, i promised @ashenwren some time to beta read the ending part (which they already did but! now i need some time with it myself) so i am leaving everybody to wait until saturday. 

meanwhile, i am offering yall a sneak peek/first look at my heihua fic which is very loosely tied to my pingxie. basically, this is just me playing around with hei xiazi as a character and his and xiao hua’s dynamic’s more... tender side. 

i know that @jockvillagersonly and ashen have already read this which has been amazing so thank you for your love ♥ but take this again ^^ also thanks to @cross-d-a for listening to me ramble about heihua and sharing this idea with me. and thank you to @i-am-just-a-kiddo​ who i’m doing all of this for ♥ you are the best parent-in-law for these two and this fandom!

It’s a bad week for him. 

First, it’s the girl he finds while raiding a warehouse full of smuggled weapons and possibly, most likely, drugs. She’s maybe twelve, eyes wide and hair messy, bones poking her skin where Hei Xiazi can see her elbows flashing under her short sleeves. There are bruises around her wrists and burn marks on the inside of her arms. She doesn’t speak but she doesn’t have to, all of her screaming of experiences worthy of a hundred years instead of a dozen. 

She presses her face into her hands when Hei Xiazi fires his gun, and he feels something come loose inside of him at the broken, aborted noise she makes that rings louder than the shot itself. 

Hei Xiazi carries her kicking and screaming out of the warehouse, leaving behind the slowly ending gun fight and the smell of gasoline. She only goes silent once Hei Xiazi puts her down, flinching bodily away from him but not going far. She hovers, fingers slowly curling around the hem of his long jacket while they wait, shoulders hunching against the cold. Hei Xiazi offers her his jacket with a smile, buys her a sandwich which she then throws up, and helps her into a hospital once they’re safe to leave. 

No one else stays behind with her. All the other people they found from that warehouse scattered as soon as the fight began and only she remained, lost in the thought of having to leave the premises that had become her world. She has no family, no house, no money. Hei Xiazi watches her leave with the social workers, bones of her wrists like twigs threatening to snap even after some proper meals and eyes so big they seem to swallow the light around her. She still hasn’t said a word. Hei Xiazi doubts she ever will. 

Her pale face looks like a ghost as she turns to give Hei Xiazi one last glance over her shoulder, and that’s what she becomes to him once he goes home and puts that warehouse out of his mind. It’s hard and he feels himself haunted, and whatever it was that got loose in his chest rattles like the tail of a snake. 

Then, he hears about Su Wan. Hears about the mission that went south with the three youngsters. Hears about Su Wan getting hurt. 

It isn’t anything new in their line of business to get hurt, to even die. When he first met the boy in the desert, he predicted he would find him six feet under after only a day. There was too much softness in Su Wan, too much trust, too much naivete. He had a big brain and clever ideas but his core was gooey, leaking out in way too telling bursts, leaving nothing hidden. 

Su Wan had reminded Hei Xiazi of young Wu Xie. Even his floundering with his knife had reminded him of Wu Xie. Even his adaptability had been annoyingly similar to Wu Xie’s, and Hei Xiazi had questioned his taste in students. At least the boy had paid better. At least the boy hadn’t been wishing to die. 

He had not expected, after knowing all of that, to experience such fear when he first heard that Su Wan had gotten himself stabbed and had almost bled out in a cave, with only Li Cu and Yang Hao to look after himself and a saving bed of a hospital hours away. His hands had shook, making it impossible to hold anything while trying to breathe, and he had quickly been reminded of the little girl, torn open and going a bit feral just because she didn’t know what to do.

It was a surprisingly new thing to care. As surprising as the fact that he still knew of such things.

“I thought I had taught you better, kid,” he says as he goes to the hospital, in the middle of the night of all things, having to cover Su Wan’s mouth so that he doesn’t scream and wake up the better half of the city. The boy’s eyes are wide and heartbeat rapid under his fingers where he can feel it pulsing against Su Wan’s jaw. Then the boy is scrambling at his fingers to speak from between them. He pulls his hand away. 

“Hei-ye!” the boy whispers fervently, like an anchor casted in water. “I thought you were out of the country!”  

“I was until yesterday when I heard that you got stabbed,” he explains, voice leaning more towards mockery than any actual care. Su Wan knows what that means. The boy knows more than anyone else has ever known about a person like Hei Xiazi. It’s a strange thing but Hei Xiazi has come to almost like it. 

“I’m fine!” the boy chirps, lighting up like a lightbulb. Hei Xiazi helps him sit in his bed, snatching a chair for himself from the corner, and then evaluates the damage. Su Wan is smiling while a thick roll of bandages circle his stomach. There are at least thirty stitches there, curving along his side. Some more adorn his bicep where he tried to evade another blade. A darkening bruise is making his cheek swell, casting an extra shadow under his chin. 

Hei Xiazi sighs and closes his eyes when Su Wan starts to tell the story, his voice a soft whisper made even softer with lingering sleep. The beep of the machines tell Hei Xiazi the boy is alive. The painful thrum of his own heart tells him he’s alive too. 

Su Wan falls asleep holding onto Hei Xiazi’s sleeve. He cannot remember how the boy got the leather between his fingers but prying his hold away is like bending steel. It feels impossible and burns equal amounts. 

Finally, he slips back into the cold night. 

He doesn’t go to his apartment, the one he’s currently occupying, his few belongings strewn across the floor and nothing making the place feel like his. Even after years and years and years, some part of him still feels sick at the thought of emptiness. He’s tried his hardest to carve his bones empty and chest clean but after each year spent alone or with someone or wanting, he realizes it’s a battle he cannot win. There’s something terribly strong under his ribs. It refuses to die even before his curse of immortality and the knowledge that goes beyond his comprehension. It refuses to die even when facing the cold, cruel world. 

The walls surrounding the Xie Manor are high but not high enough to keep him at bay. If they were, he would’ve never come here. He would’ve never returned, not after he once left. 

Climbing up the wall of the manor to the third floor makes his lungs burn, but then he’s pushing the window open already, stepping silently onto the polished floor. 

“Xiazi,” a familiar voice says, not even pretending to sound sleepy. “It’s three in the morning. Is it really a suitable time to be visiting the head of Xie family?”

Hei Xiazi smiles, shrugging off his leather jacket and placing it onto the back of a chair beside him. The air in the room feels chilly with the window open but he likes to hear the noises from outside and he likes the line of silver painted onto the floor and across the luxurious double bed. He likes that he can pretend his vision is so clear just because of the moon. 

“Hua’er-ye,” he says back, voice like honey because he loves to tease this man and loves how the tone makes his perfect eyebrows pinch. “Are you sure this isn’t a dream?”

“I would dream you naked at least, not dripping mud all over my floors.”

“As you wish,” he says and reaches for his own belt before moving closer to the bed, toeing his shoes off on the first two steps.

Xie Yuchen is warm but firm when Hei Xiazi meets his body, crashing into his lips and then slipping hands down his silk covered spine. He hums, hiding his laugh. He’s always loved the absolute brilliance and practicality and strength of this man but under all that, Xie Yuchen is a little spoiled. A rich family head. A powerful man with more money than Hei Xiazi could possibly imagine. He’s never tried, not really caring. For all his acting, he’s never gone for Xie Yuchen for his money. 

He takes care of helping Xie Yuchen out of his expensive pajamas, kissing him wet and shivering after each uncovered piece of skin. There is something beautiful about Xie Yuchen in the stark light of the moon, eyes burning bright and the line of his throat like an invitation. Hei Xiazi wishes he could tell him that, sometimes, but he’s preferred to seal his lips. His poetry would not suit the ears of Xie Yuchen. 

He’s never been one for pretty words, crude and almost barbaric instead, tongue made out of barbwire and mind of a strategic plan. Between them, all those edges exist in harmony, and so he’s never felt the need for anything more, enjoying the simplicity of just being. 

Ironically, as the sun is already rising, coloring the horizon with its colorless light, he still descends into words. It’s like something is pulling them out of his chest, and when there’s a force outside of his control beneath his ribs, he cannot do anything but unravel upon Xie Yuchen’s white satin sheets.

“There was this girl,” he says, looking into the still remaining dark – or as dark as anything can be for his eyes, that comfort taken from him ages ago. “I saved her from a warehouse a couple of days ago. She didn’t speak, couldn’t eat because she’d been kept hungry for so long. There were burn marks on her arms, probably from cigarettes or a lighter. They told me she was thirteen. She didn’t look like she was thirteen.”

Xie Yuchen’s hands are on his back, brushing lightly against his shoulder blades, drawing something there. His heartbeat is steady under Hei Xiazi’s cheek and his skin burns, burns, burns. He remembers how he had looked at that girl in the eyes and seen himself there. 

“I remember,” he says quietly, closing his eyes, “feeling the same burn on my skin. I have no memories of when or why but I know there were cigarettes. I know her pain. I know the scars.”

“Were you a child back then?” Xie Yuchen asks, his body a strong, sturdy thing against him. A rock. A mountain. He never thought he would feel lost in this world but there is something about himself in every child he’s ever saved, in all of their wide, fearful eyes, in all of their screams, their desperate fight, their bared teeth and messy heads of hair. There’s something about him in all of their thrumming, wild panic, like a bird under their skin; in their desperation to get away, to find a place to belong, to find safety and food and trust. To heal a body that has not been their own or has felt like an enemy or a liability or a curse. 

He cannot remember the time he was a child, cannot remember the time before he went blind and began to see too much, cannot remember being anything but this eternal man on the outskirts of the world. He cannot remember ever having a family or feeling the absence of it. 

But then, there’s this echo in his mind. It rings back from the eyes of every child he’s ever tried to help. He thinks, maybe, he still knows how he lost. 

“I only remember being burned,” he says. “I only remember the pain and being afraid. And isn’t that a stupid thing to remember when it could be so many things?” He laughs, as much as it can be a laugh when something twists inside of his chest, bringing tightly together that something that was let loose. He chokes on it, feeling his voice die down. Xie Yuchen turns beside him so that they both lie on their sides, looking at each other. The line of the moon falls over Xie Yuchen’s hips and almost lands on Hei Xiazi’s waiting hand. 

“Bad things linger,” Xie Yuchen says with a certainty of a man who knows this to be true. During the years, Hei Xiazi has learned a couple of the bad things that happened to this proud man. “But you are turning them into something good.”

“And how much does it change to save a couple of children?” he huffs, tired of the heart that cannot leave him at peace.  

“For them, everything.”

[suganovakawa]

hi! i found ur blog through saudade and was like!! this the good kush! and earlier i was scrolling through ur blog and saw the jealous hcs and suga's was so accurate 😭 i can totally see him being all smiley and passive aggressive like 'do you want something haha? >:)' anyways! can i request reader being sad and doubting their relationship with noya and tanaka (separate) bc they always talk abt kiyoko and how beautiful she is and how they feel abt her? thank u so much, pls take care of urself!!!

the potential this one has OMG yes i am on it 🥺 u better be taking care of yourself too , anonnie !!!

𝐈𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐂𝐄𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 .

karasuno boys remind you that you’re always going to be number one in their eyes, no matter what !

— check out my masterlist !!

we all know kiyoko is a goddess , but it’d be nice if your boyfriend could give you some of that love too , y’know ? let’s see how these two make up for giving kiyoko too much attention .

a / n : YALL . THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 500 FOLLOWERS THATS SO HARD FOR MY BRAIN TO REGISTERSJFJJDJFJD AHHHHH ILY GUYS SO MUCH 🥺💞💘💓💓💘💞💘💞

also yuu’s came out really really long so do be prepared for that — ryu’s isn’t as long because he praises kiyoko the same way yuu does , so there’s no need to repeat everything fjjdndjsjd

— ask to be part of my gen taglist !

taglist : @yams046 @janellion @avylee

yuu nishinoya

yuu has bunches of love to go around , believe me

but sometimes , it really doesn’t seem that way , y’know ?

you knew even before your relationship with the guardian deity that he was a simp for kiyoko ; how he also fell for you was even a surprise for you

but noya definitely does try and show you that you that you have a special place in his heart , even if he gawks over the team manager at times

but when his appreciation for kiyoko gets out of hand , oh it really gets out of hand

the first time it happened , you were completely shattered — however , you weren’t sure how to even handle a situation like that

everyday of just — “ kiyoko ” this , “ shimizu ” that . . . it was a never ending cycle of yuu going on and on about how the karasuno team manager was just so perfect at everything she does , that she was the paragon of beauty and so forth

and while you held no grudge against kiyoko — hell , she made it very clear that she had absolutely no interest in yuu . like , multiple times — seeing him gush over her so much made you feel self conscious in yourself

you were his significant other , weren’t you ?

so why wasn’t he treating you that way ?

it came to a point where you just didn't say anything the moment yuu brought up kiyoko . there was no point in trying to stop him or changing the subject , because once he was on a roll ; he was on a mf roll

god , even the first years could see that noya was giving kiyoko more attention than you

the only one besides noya who didn't notice this was tanaka , who was just as smitten over kiyoko as the libero was

and everyday , it was the same old topic ; didn't they have anything else to talk about ?

" DUUUUUDE . YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT HAPPENED . "

" WHAT , BRO ? "

" KIYOKO PICKED UP MY PENCIL FOR ME WHEN I DROPPED IT IN FRONT OF HER TODAY . I AM NEVER USING ANOTHER PENCIL AGAIN . "

" DAMN , YOU'RE SO LUCKY ! I NEED TO GET HER TO DO THAT FOR ME TOO "

and your snapping point : yuu choosing to help kiyoko clean stuff up instead of walking you home after practice

was this his way of breaking up with you ? whatever it was , you couldn't handle it anymore . just seeing yuu give so much of his time to kiyoko was heartbreaking for you ; you even began to question if you really were a significant other figure to nishinoya

you stopped showing up to practice

and shortly after , you avoided and ignored the second year as a whole

it took about less than two days for noya to realize that you weren’t around for him

and even worse — you seemed to have no interest in talking to him when he did try and approach you

uh oh , he really messed up now

he approached the third years with his head hung low , wanted advice on how to talk to you again

and they were willing to help , of course ; but not before giving him absolute hell for not noticing his own actions sooner

it took three tries to get you to talk to noya again

daichi approached you first after class , wanting you to come back to practice again ; you politely told him no , and before he could press on further , you hastily turned heel and walked away

second attempt was suga and asahi , suga was more straightforward with his attempt at bringing you back , while the other was just there mainly for support ; he explained that noya felt apologetic and wanted to make it up to you , but you countered with “ if he really was sorry , he’d come himself . not make you do it for him . ” and you left

third time’s a charm — kiyoko was the final person to confront you

you were still upset , and she understood that completely — she explained that even with noya’s , ehem , worship over her , he still cares about you deeply ; he just gets overly excited and doesn’t know how to control it

and she added that there was no practice due to ukai being out that day , but yuu was still waiting for you in the gym

you finally gave in , walking slowly to see kiyoko’s words speak for themselves — there he was , sitting against the wall with his eyes staring intently at the ground

“ yuu . . . ”

his head popped upwards the moment he heard your voice , scrambling to his feet to sprint to you as fast as his two legs could take him

before you could say anything else , he jumped forward and pulled you into the biggest hug he could offer ; shakily , you hugged back with the same intensity , burying your face in him as he just continued to squeeze you as if you’d disappear if he dared let go

he began to blubber all sorts of apologies — about how stupid of a boyfriend he was , that he should’ve noticed he was hurting your feelings sooner , that he shouldn’t have been fawning over kiyoko

he would’ve continued , but you shut his mouth with a finger , smiling softly as you shook your head

“ it’s okay , i forgive you . it just . . . hurt my feelings , is all . i know you like kiyoko a lot , so i didn’t want to — ”

“ no , y/n . you’re my s.o. , i shouldn’t have been like that . you’re my priority , not kiyoko . she used to be , but not anymore . i know that now , and that will never happen again , i promise . ”

and believe me , his redemption went all out

he'd walk you to and from school , catch up with you after every class , walk you to lunch , compliment your clothes and remind you of how much he appreciates you having in his life - kiyoko basically became nonexistent to him after that

tanaka didn't seem to mind - now he had the manager all to himself KDKSKKD

once in a while he gets caught up again , but this time he's more wary of your feelings ; if he sees that your mood has changed even a little bit , he'll ask you if he's too much , and then he'll forget about kiyoko again

yuu definitely has a long way to go until he's a perfect boyfriend , but he'll dedicate himself to make sure you know that you're irreplaceable in his eyes

ryuunosuke tanaka

something tells me ryu would definitely be more attentive than yuu , but he's still a total simp for shimizu

the moment you stop coming to practice , oh he notices right away

i imagine it going the same way as noya — him just talking everyone’s ears off about kiyoko’s a goddess , that she deserves all the best things in the world . . . all while you’re right there next to him

it’s a stab in the heart , to put it lightly ; you can only take so much before it just downright hurts

you’ve tried to talk to tanaka about it — he’ll brush you off with a “ hey babe ! ” with a quick kiss to the forehead / cheek before running off to practice again

so naturally , you felt defeated , and could only defend yourself — your heart — by not going to practice anymore , as well as just avoiding him as a whole

oh boy , did tanaka feel like an absolute failure of a boyfriend

“ y/n was here at school today . . . why didn’t they show up for practice ? they’re usually here , helping set up the net before standing next to kiyoko ”

tsukishima will probably be the one to retort back to him — you are his senpai , and he noticed how dejected you were , the more ryuunosuke ignored you for the team manager

“ oh , y/n decided not to show up today . someone decided they were gonna be a better boyfriend , and not fawn and drool over someone else like a dweeb . ” tsukishima was a jerk , yes , but he hated that tanaka was just so blatantly ignorant to you ; you didn’t deserve that at all and he knew that

“ WHAT ? Y/N WOULD NEVER — ” his voice dropped as his eyes widened in realization , “ oh my god , i’ve been neglecting my own s.o. for kiyoko . . . ”

it was an awkward silence , the third years didn’t know if they should berate him or comfort him of his realization , the second years were feeling awkward AF ( especially yuu ) for not telling him sooner , and the rest of the first years weren’t exactly very well-versed in the romance department so they had absolutely no advice for the wing spiker

even ukai was confused that you weren’t there as he walked in “ where’s y/n ? they said they’d help me with — ”

a bunch of people giving him the “ NO NO NO NO NO ” signal as he finally lays eyes on ryu , keishin understanding that something must’ve happened

tanaka was not doing well that practice , too side tracked and too upset with himself to focus properly

it came to the point where daichi had to pull him aside , and give him a stern talking to

“ listen here , tanaka . i know you now understand how stupid you were in being so overly obsessive over kiyoko with y/n always standing right there , and simply , you are the one who needs to make things right with them . you should wait until tomorrow though , so you have time with them . they’re not the type of person to hate so easily , especially if it’s you . have this be a valuable lesson , and i hope you remember how important of a person y/n is , to us , and to you . ”

tanaka had a whole epiphany with daichi’s speech — damn right , you were his . so why did he need to simp over kiyoko , when he had an amazing s.o. already by his side ?

with the team’s permission , tanaka requested to miss practice the next day — he promised he’d make up for it the following day , he just wanted to spend more time with you and make up for what he did

it wasn’t easy for him , coming to grips with his own foolishness as he approached you after class

“ y/n . . . i want to take you somewhere after school , if that’s fine ? ”

though you were hesitant in responding , you didn’t have the nerve to look away , nor run . “ but ryu , don’t you have practice today ? ”

he smiled sheepishly and shrugged , “ i got permission from the others to skip it today , i just have to work even harder to make up for it . ” taking you by the hand , he pulled you closer to him “ besides , nothing is more important to me than treating my beloved s.o. to something special , especially after how poorly i treated you for the past few days ”

TANAKA IS GENTLEMAN MATERIAL OKAY , I STAND BY THIS ; A WHOLE CLOSETED GENTLEMAN BUT NO ONE WILL EVER GIVE THIS MAN A CHANCE none of y’all are ready for that conversation yet

but like woah , what happened to ryu ? going from kiyoko simp to this . . . it flustered you to the MAX

“ but in all seriousness y/n , i’m really sorry for how i acted . i shouldn’t have been paying so much attention to kiyoko like how i used to , now that i’m lucky enough to have you in my life . i want to try and make it up to you , starting with this badass cute date i’ve got planned for the two of us ! ”

you can’t help but smile as tanaka drags you out of the school , you’ve already forgiven him for just this precious moment alone

“ badass and cute aren’t words you’d use at the same time to describe something , ryu — ”

“ well , they are now ! ”

even kiyoko will be surprised at how he’s hardly even fazed by her at after today’s events ; ryuunosuke is a changed man , for you

you’ve got one of the biggest simps in haikyuu as your boyfriend , be prepared for how this mf is going to SPOIL . YOU .

[konaizumi]

A Tale of a Thousand Stars ep 8 thoughts/reaction

did i watch this episode secretly on my phone while i was in class bc i couldn’t stand waiting a whole hour to watch the new ep? maybe

tian visiting torfun’s memorial to leave flowers and tell her that he’s going to pha pun dao was sweet

also him and phupha missing each other again was just a really nice scene and phupha wondering who left her flowers

i have decided to forgive dr nam for last episode (the snooping not the flirting thing) bc i know he was just concerned about his friend and he didn’t intend for phupha to have that kind of reaction, but he still should’ve confronted tian directly before telling phupha

the way tian is looking at longtae in the beginning, seeing how supportive he’s being and knowing that he’s probably about to lose longtae as well

god this scene was so painful to watch, just knowing what was coming

but the editing that combines tian’s speech with phupha reading through the notebook

also, thank you to the writers for confirming that the tian/torfun similarities are bc he’s been reading the notebook and not because torfun’s spirit is possessing him, i didn’t think they would do that but nice to have confirmation

poor tian really did go there with the best intentions

oof, when the music goes silent when phupha interrupts his speech

also, i said this last week, but it should’ve been the rangers responsibility to tell everyone torfun had died and the fact that they didn’t only added to tian’s burden and the animosity aimed at him, and it annoyed me the way the rangers (perhaps unintentionally) let tian take on the full blame and didn’t admit that they had known about torfun’s death from the start

god and the way tian’s heart break is visible on his face as soon as phupha interrupts/confronts him and he realizes that phupha won’t be on his side

and mix’s acting in this scene (and the entire episode) is just so good, you can see the way he’s desperately trying to keep in together and not completely break down, and his heartbreak when he realizes he’s all alone

also, i made a longer post about how i understand phupha’s reaction, I think it’s pretty natural and that he’s not overreacting, however, i do wish he hadn’t confronted tian so publicly like that 

just everything about this scene is just so good in the most painful way, especially the sad orchestral version of the theme song

now i think this ep is too sad for me to say it’s my favorite, but from a narrative/cinematography perspective it is my favorite, it was just really well done

i was really hoping the kids would have a bigger role this ep and begin the forgiveness process for the rest of the village, so i was excited when Meejoo came but then p’aof decided to stab me directly in the heart when she asked what death is

(also im sorry but how old are these kids that she doesn’t know what the word death is?)

(also given that everything that happens in this ep happens within like a 30 hour period, i still hold hope for the kids forgiving next ep once they have some time to process)

at least they didn’t make me watch the scene where tian had to explain what death was, that would’ve killed me

i understand the villager’s reactions too, and i do kind of wish tian would just stay home and give them some time to grieve and process before trying to interact with them–i don’t blame tian for keeping the truth from them this long, but he does need to respect the pain they’re going through

also this scene with phupha really fucked me up, the way phupha remains stone faced even though he’s clearly in a lot of pain

“i wish i could return it to her” one of the things about this story that really fucks me up is that you can’t have both torfun and tian--torfun had to die for tian to live, and if torfun had lived then tian would have died and all the characters are in a way stuck with this moral dilemma of “choosing” between tian and torfun, even if the decision was already made for them, and tian has had to deal with this problem since the beginning and made his choice a long time ago that he would have preferred that torfun had lived instead of him bc he feels like she had more to live for and left behind more than he would’ve

also the scene is so much more painful knowing that just that morning phupha had finally said out loud that he wanted tian to stay

and i was really ton this scene between understanding phupha’s reaction and where he’s coming from but also being like “please stop talking to my son like that, he feels bad enough as is”

i have often had the emotion of “i want to walk through the screen so i can give this character a hug” and i have literally never felt it stronger than this episode of atots

also thank you to dr nam who told phupha not that he was wrong for his actions, but that he should’ve confronted tian differently, also for figuring out that tian wasn’t the driver

the fact that tian just walked through the tea field so he knows that either khama was lying to him or that longtae saw him in the field and hid from him

poor longtae tho, thought he knew what was coming then was hit with “im responsible for her death”

you know what? i didn’t realize khama would have such a recurring role from the first episode, but i really like him--he’s trying to do his best for the village and that isn’t always easy and he’s the first to try to think about tian’s perspective even when it’s clearly difficult for him

also i love khaotung, he does a really good job as longtae, and as much as i loved him as chonlatee, i prefer him in more mature roles like longtae or fong

did dr nam really think phupha would keep letting tian stay in his room?

it came as a surprise to likely no one but i am glad to have definitve confirmation that tian was in fact not driving the car

against my wishes, tul did not show up this episode to give tian a hug so i hope he’s in the next ep to provide some much needed emotional support

tian’s involvement in torfun’s death is also complicated because to say he had no responsibility in it would be wrong but to say he had full responsibility wouldn’t be right either, there was so much of the situation that was just due to chance, as it the case in any accident, so i appreciate the nuance of the narrative in that tian does take responsibility (even if he takes too much) but other characters like longtae argue that it’s not his fault, bc it’s easy from an outside perspective to say it’s not tian’s fault but it would be much harder to be in tian’s position and not feel responsible that his actions lead to torfun’s death

longtae is truly best boi

tian saying he’s okay with just longtae understanding him is so sad but at the same time it’s good that he’s not trying to force other people to understand or forgive him

now i really want to know what torfun’s wish is bc you know it’s going to be all meaningful and thematically relevant

istg if i had a fucking nickel for every time tian has tried to give me a heart attack

i spent the entirety of part 4 yelling at tian to just stop being stupid

like i get it, you don’t feel like you have the time to waste to go find phupha, but still

also im worried that maybe the reason he was so adamant about doing it himself and not finding phupha was because he didn’t feel like he could go to phupha or that phupha might not believe him

tian please just listen to longtae being the voice of reason

or at least send longtae back to the village to go get phupha if you’re this determined

as soon as he pulled out his phone i fucking knew the flash would go off bc tian can’t be smart without also being dumb

pls don’t hit my son he has a weak heart

longtae running away like “i didn’t sign up for this shit”

pls stop hitting my son

i was wondering how tian’s dad would become involved in the story again and tian name dropping him to escape being killed by poachers was not it

but sakda was clearly scared when tian first said the name so obvi they’re connected and i’m assuming the person who called tian’s dad was either sakda or one of the other men there which means that tian’s dad is doing illegal shit (surprise surprise)

tian i know you’re stressed but pls let rang provide first aid

that montage at the end tho really hit me

also the parallels between this scene and the one when tian fainted in the field, it’s literally the exact same scene but the roles are reversed

also the fucking post credits scene, the emotional whiplash, the pain from knowing phupha said this stuff literally hours before everything went wrong

the way i squealed when phupha said i do (and throught the rest of the scene), it was literally the sweetest thing, it might be my favorite phutian moment so far

so for the last two episodes, im assuming that tian’s dad coming to get him and the dad being involved in illegal stuff will be the main external conflict, i wouldn’t be surprised if next ep ended with the dad showing up and demanding to take tian back

also the next ep preview, khama telling tian to forgive himself, im weak

this episode just made me feel so much, the story is just so complex and nuanced, and the characters are real and messy, and pls more bl in the future that aren’t afraid to tell more serious stories (as much as i love the romcom style of most bls i would love some more variety)

[wetalkinboutbooks]

New Year, New Review 🤩

A Sky Beyond the Storm by Sabaa Tahir

Summary: The long-imprisoned jinn are on the attack, wreaking bloody havoc in villages and cities alike. But for the Nightbringer, vengeance on his human foes is just the beginning.

At his side, Commandant Keris Veturia declares herself Empress, and calls for the heads of any and all who defy her rule. At the top of the list? The Blood Shrike and her remaining family.

Laia of Serra, now allied with the Blood Shrike, struggles to recover from the loss of the two people most important to her. Determined to stop the approaching apocalypse, she throws herself into the destruction of the Nightbringer. In the process, she awakens an ancient power that could lead her to victory--or to an unimaginable doom.

And deep in the Waiting Place, the Soul Catcher seeks only to forget the life--and love--he left behind. Yet doing so means ignoring the trail of murder left by the Nightbringer and his jinn. To uphold his oath and protect the human world from the supernatural, the Soul Catcher must look beyond the borders of his own land. He must take on a mission that could save--or destroy--all that he knows. (Taken from Goodreads)

Our Ratings:  

 → Geena:  ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

 → Kae: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Overall: The final instalment of the Ember Quartet had us crying in the metaphorical club. It’s exciting, terrifying, and probably the horniest book in the series and we loved it!

~Spoiler-full discussion below~

The Good:

→ Elias and Laia

Geena: In the final instalment of the Ember quartet, Sabaa deprives us of an Elias POV and slaps us with the Soulcatcher instead… He’s very much an ‘emotions are bad’ type of dude, the opposite of Elias who always had so many… but both of them are so angsty? The Soulcatcher really likes to beat up trees when his memories from when he was Elias resurface which was so emo to me. Despite being possessed by Mauth he is also such a coward, especially around Laia, because Elias’ feelings for Laia scare him and every single time he is like *running emoji*. We were surprised that Sabaa let him remain the soulcatcher for so long, every chapter I was like ‘Okay, maybe this is where Elias breaks through…’ but no.. Elias remained buried UNTIL their night in the cabin… the Soulcatcher was like ‘k I’m out’ but ONLY for ONE NIGHT and that still makes me scream.. The Soulcatcher was like ‘you kids are too horny for me, I’m gonna take a nap for a bit and let Elias take over bc Jesus.’ 

Despite it all, the Soulcatcher’s chapters were enjoyable albeit painful because this man was so duty bound, like even Elias wasn’t that dedicated when he was a Mask. But near the end, when we finally get the chapter that starts with Elias…. Ngl I cried a little, and immediately wanted to reread the whole series (I feel like Sabaa did this on purpose to torture us). I want to fight Sabaa though, like she did an amazing job showing how Elias’ conscious and the Soulcatcher’s conscious were constantly fighting one another, and how Elias’ memories of the people he loved ultimately fuelled the Soulcatcher’s actions… even though the Soulcatcher was like ‘I’m doing this for the ghosts’ like okay… no ghost told you to keep protecting and kissing Laia but you still did it…  

Kae: Okay, so Geena summed up my boy Ilyaas pretty damn well. Also, we LOVE HIS ETHNIC NAME IN THIS HOUSE. But um, YES. Elias was a sad boy ™ the whole time while fighting his emotions and ultimately losing. It was so PAINFUL as a reader, seeing all of  his chapters except the ONE say ‘Soulcatcher’. But when it finally said ELIAS again, I too, started to cry. Because he was BACK. 

You can all thank the power of Laia’s determination to seduce Elias back to himself, because our girl was NOT giving up. She said ‘you gonna get this coochie, dammit’ and in the cabin, Elias was like ‘well i’ll be damned. I sure as hell am. I am BACK BAYBEEEEE’

Geena: Sabaa Tahir said horny rights like ksjdnfdsjknfsdk

Kae: AUFVAHLHVKJ. BUT YES. In the end, love won. And so did sex because everyone was doin it or TRYING to do it. I guess when the world is ending, you only get one last time to uhh…. Have a good time. So they made sure they did lmao 

Now, let’s get into Laia. 

Laia. My sweet little cupcake. My mug of tea with too much honey. This girl has been through literal hell and back, and yet, she kept going. She NEVER gave up. Laia woke up in book 4 like ‘Today i will commit crimes. Helene and I crave violence’ and they both just started kicking ASS and I LOVED THAT. I was really happy to see the progression of Laia and Helen’s friendship and how they genuinely grew to like one another and see each other as besties. They both deserved a girl friend and I’m glad they found a friendship within each other. 

Laia is the bravest character in this damn book. She went from poor scholar, to slave, to hero and she was brave because she had to be. Laia is strong and took on their entire world. She had help, but she did a lot of it alone and that takes some real guts. She is the most genuine, sweetest, bravest girl and I love her. <3 

Laia also single handedly brought the Ilyaas back from his Soulcatcher shit. During this whole book she was just like ‘You know what? I think I’mma go mess with Elias’ emo ass today to see if I can get him to kiss me or something’ THEN SHE PROCEEDED TO SHOW UP AT THIS MANS HOUSE (realm or whatever) BUTTASS NEKKID. And he saw her and immediately flew the hell out of there it was TOO MUCH and he LIKED IT but couldn’t admit it. 

Geena: You know what I love about that whole scene was like earlier she was like ‘He’s a lost cause idc’ and then Darin was like ‘Elias wouldn’t give up on you if that happened’ and Laia was like ‘you’re right, he would show up stark naked and try to seduce me back to my body’ and she did just that...

Kae: SHE DID. SHE SHOWED UP AND SHOWED OUT! Like, her entire mission was to bring Elias back while also planning on taking down the Nightbringer. But she was straight up like ‘okay but not before i get my man back through SEDUCTION’. Ugh, the mango scene?  Superb. 

Geena: Laia is hands down one of my favourite book characters to exist. Her journey from the first book being a scared girl with a missing brother, to being the face of a revolution… like the GROWTH. Like Kae mentioned, she and Helene end up as BESTIIEESSSS, and I was surprised at how natural they seemed. Because we went from them hating each other to close friends, but despite not seeing their development, it came off so natural? So, I loved that! 

Kae covered Laia’s character pretty thoroughly, she was both a horndog and a bad bitch. Like this girl has pretended to be a Slave for the Commandment to travelling a desert by herself and facing off a squad of Jinn… In retrospect, Laia is a unique case, she’s allowed to be kind and caring and doesn’t have to be a fighter type to be strong. She’s not the chosen one, which this book made clear, it could’ve been anyone to fight the Nightbringer… but only Laia was strong enough to love him AND defy him. And I just love her a lot… she was very much an anime protagonist with the power of love, family, and friendship… anyways I love her and that’s all I have to say

→ Helene 

Geena: The way I ended up liking and rooting for Helene this book? Came out of left field. To be honest, in previous books I didn’t feel much for her other than ‘stop chasing after Elias and Laia pls.’ But this book I wanted her to win, especially with the fight against the germanic-esque invaders. She goes through substantial development, no longer seeing Scholars as slaves and taking their opinions seriously.. Like Laia, Musa, and Darin were all a part of her crew. A stark difference from Book 1 Helene, who thought Scholars only had one role in the world and that was slaves. 

Helene… like Laia… really has the Ember equivalent of hot girl summer with Harper… all the time she spends denying it she is like *jumps on him the chance she gets*. The bath scene… Helene’s power was turning her tortuer into her MAN… But also Sabaa said that ‘yes she has changed, but she has to repent for her sins’ and that’s why Helene is basically left alone at the end (save for Laia, Elias, and Musa). 

Kae: So not gonna lie, I never actually disliked Helene. I saw her as the flawed character she was in the beginning. During her cat and mouse chase with Elias and Laia in the beginning, she would piss me OFF because like, that’s your BEST FRIEEEEEND. JUST STAAAAHP. But also, it was him or her and her family's death, so I get it. But I always saw potential in her to be better. And thank GOODNESS she went through all that character development. Because she was a damn menace in the beginning. 

Also like Geena mentioned; Helly and Harper finally hooking up? I swear the heavens opened up in that moment because EVERYONE could feel their tension. LIKE JUST DO IT ALREADY. You can’t fight love, baybeeee

Watching Helly grow as a person was really rewarding as a reader. Like Geena said, she went from hating scholars to being like ‘hmm, maybe my opinions are shitty?’ and straight up changed.  I also feel for her because she lost her ENTIRE family and like, honestly? I would’ve given up. BUT SHE DIDN’T. She’s a literal fighter, bred for this shit. So she FOUGHT. And I was really scared she was gonna get murked because y’all know Keris’ tiny evil ass doesn’t have a chill button. And when they were fighting? I was like LAWD PLS DON’T  TAKE HELLY. But instead he took Harper *upside down smiley face* SO THAT WAS FUCKED UP AND I WASN’T READY FOR IT. But a piece of me knew it was coming. 

The Bad:   

→ Darin and Harper

Geena: As Kae mentioned… Harper kicked the can in this book :’( His eventual fall came from loving and caring for Helene too much, which left him open and gave Keris the chance to stab him. Harper was basically Helene’s heart outside her body, and when he went down so did Helene. I had had a feeling when Book 3 ended that Harper wouldn’t make it, but I WASN’T HAPPY ABOUT BEING RIGHT FOR ONCE… Harper had finally met his brother (Elias) and hadn’t even had a chance to meet the real Elias and talk to him about their father or other sibling stuff. LIKE OF ALL CHARACTER DEATHS… AND THERE WAS A LOT… The other one that came out of left field was fucking Darin of Serra… DARIN… THE ONE DUDE WE SPENT TWO WHOLE BOOKS SAVING… DEAD WITH A SNAP OF HIS NECK!! I WAS SO MAD

LIKE SABAA HAD US THINKING HE WAS GONNA BE SAFE, SHE GAVE HIM A LIL GIRLFRIEND AND EVERYTHING BUT THEN SHE GOES.. AND KILLS HIM?? JUST LIKE THAT?? Then we had to read the scenes where Elias helps both Darin and Harper pass over into the afterlife and I was just *cries angrily* 

Kae: Well, THAT was sad. Have you ever just like, felt your heart break into a million tiny irreparable pieces? That’s how I felt when Darin and Harper died. Because like, they were both trying to save the women they loved. Darin to Laia, (foolishly so against the Nightbringer) but I would do it for my little sister too. And Harper with Helene against evilass Keris. Dude, that shit just sucked. It hurt to read. It hurt to imagine the girls feeling the pain of their deaths. They were both such good men. And DARIIIN. 

Darin didn’t have to go out like that, man. It was such a harsh death. No last words. It was just over and his body was just gone. I wish Laia would’ve been able to talk with him at The Waiting Place at least one last time. But it is what it is. I hated to see both of them go. Especially since Darin pretty much sparked this whole series. 

Sure, Laia, Helene, and Elias were the main characters. But Darin was the spark that started the fire. And he didn’t even get to see it’s flames extinguished. 

Geena: He was the ember in the ashes… literally like Sabaa uses that for Elias and Laia but it applies to Darin the most

Kae: LITCHRALLY gonna get teary eyed over here. Our boys deserved better :( 

Conclusion 

Geena: This was not at all a disappointing end to the series we’ve followed closely for so long. The different plot points and character arcs were tied up nicely, and Sabaa Tahir showed us once again why she’s one of the best fantasy writers on this side of the Milky Way. We didn’t even bother including a ‘The Ugly’ section because we loved it too much ksfmsd. The only qualm I’d have with the end was the empire remaining, Helene recognized the Scholars as equals but centuries of pain isn’t easily forgotten you know? SO THAT’S WHY I THINK WE DESERVE A SEQUEL SERIES… BUT I DIGRESS… OVERALL, I loved this book and the ending for all the characters ESPECIALLY FOR OUR GIRL LAIA <3

Kae: YES. I AGREE 100% WITH GEENA. It was such a beautiful end to the series. Sabaa is  GENIUS and her storytelling is phenomenal. I loved every little surprise she’s hidden in all of the books. ESPECIALLY WITH COOK BEING ALIVE? I DIDN’T SEE THAT SHIT COMING AT ALL. LIKE HOLY SHIT? So Laia had some remaining family afterall, and I think that’s very sweet. I’m really sad to see the series be over with and Geena and I are both *~HOPIIIING~* for an epilogue or some little crumbs or SOMETHING with the gang and how their lives ended up into middle adulthood or something. 

Geena: I would literally take a single paragraph… Ms. Tahir…. Blease…

Kae: But yes, in conclusion, Laia has a heart of gold and we LOVE HER. She’s brave and strong and smart, and was the only one out of THOUSANDS to stick for herself and defy the Nightbringer, and save the whole world. Helene has come a long way and she developed beautifully as a character. And Elias. Ohhh, Ilyaas. His continued self sacrifice and bravery and love still helped him live in the end and I think that’s beautiful. 

[thompsborn]

fic where harley is a doctor that works w helen cho that sees peter often because of how much he gets hurt from being spider-man? and they fall in love bc they r already smitten for each other bc why wouldn't they be

i didn’t know how much i needed an au like this until you sent it omg

[read on ao3]

—

He’s in the middle of taking a sip of coffee when the alarm goes off.

“Mister Keener,” Friday says, as he’s cursing over the hot coffee that’s soaking into the front of his shirt. Thankfully, it’s not hot enough to actually burn him, but that doesn’t make it any less unpleasant. “Your assistance is needed in the Medical Wing.”

Harley frowns. “What time is it?”

“Four fifty eight in the morning, Mister Keener.”

“Jesus, really?” Harley sets his mug down and turns his arm over to look at his watch. His brows shoot up towards his hairline, surprised. “Wow. Okay. Didn’t realize it was... Jesus. Alright.”

Friday sounds almost amused when she tells him, “Doctor Cho is insisting you hurry.”

Harley sighs. “Yeah, okay. On my way.”

At this time of the night, the only medical staff on hand are the ones who live close by—like Helen, who has an apartment less than a two minute walk away—and those who live on site, like Harley, who’s had his own floor in the tower since he was fifteen and told Tony over a phone call that he was thinking about coming to New York once he was done with high school. Because of this, Harley isn’t all that surprised to find that it’s only him and Helen that show up in the MedBay—if anything, it’s what he expected.

And he should have expected who, exactly, they’re treating in the middle of the night, but he still finds himself mildly surprised when he comes face to face with Peter’s sheepish grin.

“Of course it’s you,” Harley says, standing at the foot of the hospital bed with his arms crossed over his chest. “Who else would be waking me up like this?”

“Don’t lie to me,” Peter says, sheepish grin turning a bit snarky. “You weren’t asleep.”

Harley purses his lips. “I could’ve been.”

Peter rolls his eyes, but doesn’t get the chance to respond before Helen is hovering by his side, snapping her gloves into place and instructing, “Friday, give me the run down.“

“Mister Parker has several second degree burns along his left leg and left arm,” Friday responds. “His right wrist is broken, and there appears to be a laceration along his abdomen.”

Harley winces in sympathy. “Rough night?”

Peter tries to shrug, but the movement makes his features twist up in a flash of pain. His voice comes out a bit strained when he says, “You could say that. There was—house fire. Not fun.”

“Get everyone out?” Harley asks, if only to provide a slight distraction as Helen assesses the broken wrist, likely checking to see if it needs to be reset or if it’ll be able to heal properly as it is. Peter tries for a grin.

“All of ‘em. Even the kids pet turtle.”

Harley pats Peter’s right knee, careful to remember that it’s his left leg with the burns. “Job well done, Spider-Man.”

“Harley,” Helen says, grabbing his attention. She’s apparently deemed Peter’s wrist not a main concern and is already peeling Peter’s suit off of him. Harley snaps into focus instantly, listening intently as Helen tells him, “I need you to take care of the laceration while I get started on the burns. When that’s done, we need to get that wrist in a cast until it heals.”

Peter pouts. “A cast? Really?”

Helen looks at him sharply. “Last time we didn’t put you in a cast, you managed to re-break your arm before it could heal. Twice.”

Peter’s pout vanishes with a meek chuckle. “It was an accident?” he offers.

“You, Peter Parker,” Helen says, averting her attention back to his burns as she speaks, “are somehow my best and my worst patient of all time. And I’m Tony Stark’s doctor, too, so that says a whole lot about you.”

“Hey—” Peter cuts off with a hiss as Harley starts to disinfect the large cut on his side. Harley offers an apologetic half smile that Peter waves away with another wince and a wobbly sort of grin. “I’m not worse than Mr. Stark.”

Helen hums, high pitched and teasing.

“I’m not,” Peter insists. “I’m not!”

“Believe what you want,” Helen tells him.

Peter huffs. “Why are you being mean to me? Aren’t doctors supposed to be nice to their patients? Isn’t that, like, a thing?”

Harley snorts when Helen says, “Next time, don’t wake me up at four in the morning with second degree burns and a broken wrist, and maybe then I’ll be nicer to you, hm?”

—

The thing is, Harley didn’t plan on this.

As in, growing up, he was sure that what he wanted was to be a mechanic. He loved to build, take apart, recreate, understand. It’s all he ever did. Hell, when Tony Frickin’ Stark broke into his garage, the guy ended up making Harley his own mechanic heaven to say thanks for helping him out.

And Harley still loves all of that, to be fair—he spends a lot of his free time tinkering in Tony’s lab now, helping him out with whatever the man’s working on and often working on his own fun little projects on the side—but it’s not his main drive. It’s not the center of his world.

He thinks it started when he saved Tony.

In a way, anyway—he had only been twelve at the time, and it’s not like twelve year olds are exactly apt on having life changing realizations that change the course of their future. Still, he was a twelve year old that saved Tony Stark’s life, and there was some kind of thrill, almost. It was hard to explain then, and Harley isn’t sure if he could put it into words now, but the feeling had made his fingers feel all tingly and his heart thud heavily in his chest. It was similar to when he built his first successful bot and it came whirring to life, only the feeling was intensified.

He felt like he was doing what he was supposed to be doing. He knew he wanted to save lives.

“You’re getting better,” Helen tells him, after Harley’s helped the medical team with bandaging up the members of the Avengers that just returned from a mission. None of the wounds had been major, mostly just scrapes and bruises, but it’s the most amount of people Harley has helped treat at once, which is a big step.

Harley shrugs, drying off his hands, having just finished washing them. “You’re a good teacher.”

Helen chuckles at that. “How are your classes?”

“Good,” Harley answers, nodding his head. “Kinda boring. I know most of it already, thanks to all the training you’ve given me, but that‘s not really new. I knew everything they taught me in high school, too.”

“You sound like Peter when you say that,” Helen muses, an amused quirk to her brow.

Harley rolls his eyes. “Y’know, people keep saying that, but I only see him when he’s bleeding out and that doesn’t make it feel like we’re all that similar.”

“Oh, you’re similar, alright,” Helen says, laughing a bit. “You’re both genius kids who bust your asses off to save people’s lives.”

Wrinkling his nose, Harley says, “But I don’t do it in spandex. Key difference there, doc.”

Helen holds her hands up in some kind of surrender. “Just saying, you two are alike.”

“I’ll make sure to tell him you said that next time he breaks his leg,” Harley quips.

“Sorry to interrupt,” Friday interjects, “but Spider-Man is reportedly injured and heading to the tower now. ETA of six and a half minutes.”

Harley rolls his eyes up to the ceiling with an exasperated sigh. Helen can only laugh.

—

“Ow. Ow, ow—oh, Jesus, that’s—ow—!”

“Sorry,” Harley says, only averting his eyes for a second to flash Peter an apologetic look before focusing back on the stitches he’s giving him.

Peter curses, slamming his left fist into his own thigh as Harley pushes the needle through. “This sucks,” he complains, clenching his jaw and grinding his teeth. “This is—why is this worse than getting stabbed? Why do I prefer getting stabbed over this? This blows.”

“You need to stop moving,” Harley tells him.

Making an indignant sort of noise, Peter asks, “How the hell am I—I can’t stop moving! This hurts, man, like—like, really fuckin’ hurts!”

“Moving makes it worse, dipshit,” Harley retorts, fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

“You know what else makes it worse?” Peter glares at the wall. “Not having pain killers.”

Harley does roll his eyes now. “Not my job. I just give you the drugs, I don’t make them.”

“I know, but Mr. Stark isn’t here for me to bitch at, so I’m complaining to you about it instead.”

Harley can’t help the way that he snorts at that, finishing off the last of the stitches as he does so. “I usually don’t like to listen to someone complain while I’m working.”

“Sucks to suck,” Peter replies. “Are you done?”

“Yep.” Harley leans back, taking off his gloves and tossing them into the trash. “Any other injuries? Stab wounds? Broken bones?”

Peter hums, tilting his head from side to side. “I don’t think so. Friday?”

“All clear, Mr. Parker.”

Harley frowns. “The fact that you had to ask worries me.”

Peter shrugs. “I get hurt a lot. Kinda used to it.”

“Still,” Harley says. “That’s concerning. Like, you still feel pain, right? You would know if you were hurt somewhere else, wouldn’t you?”

“Oh, trust me, I feel pain,” Peter snorts. “But some things just... don’t matter? Like... I dunno, but if it’s not serious, it’s like my brain filters it out on it’s own to focus on other things. Which, probably, y’know, not good, but, like, oh well.”

“Definitely not good,” Harley murmurs, frowning to himself as he squints around the room for a moment. “Well, if you have nothing else, then you’re good to go. And, honestly, thank god that’s all you have, ‘cause this is the first time I’ve done anything without Helen around and anything more than stitches would’ve had me flipping shit and fucking it all up.”

Peter lets out a light laugh, pulling his shirt down, over the gash that Harley just finished stitching. “You wouldn’t fuck it up,” he says, sounding light and humorous yet entirely serious, too. “You’re, like, really good at your job, Harley.”

Harley scrunches his nose up on his face. “Ew. Don’t be nice to me. It’s gross.”

Peter laughs again, a little bit louder, though the way it makes his stomach jump has him wincing when it pulls at his stitches. “I’m serious!” he insists. “Like, I know you’re still a med student and stuff, but Helen is probably the best person to be training you, so you’re, like, more qualified than most normal doctors. You have the experience that most people still in med school don’t have. I mean, you patch up the freakin’ Avengers, Harley! You gotta be good at this to do that!”

“I help patch up the Avengers,” Harley corrects. “The only person I’ve ever fixed up by myself is you, thanks to your insane ability to always get hurt.”

“It’s a talent,” Peter shrugs. “And hey, I bet it keeps you entertained.”

Harley snorts. “Entertained is not the right word for it, Spidey. Impressed, maybe, by just how much trouble you’re capable of getting yourself into.”

Peter grins. “Gotta impress people somehow, right?”

—

Harley wouldn’t call it bonding.

Because it’s not. It’s not bonding. It’s small talk, and pleasant conversations, while Harley sets a broken bone or treats another burn. It’s filling the silence because, apparently, Helen trusts Harley to handle Peter on his own, unless it’s a major injury that requires more than one person on hand, and Harley isn’t sure why he’s being trusted with this, but he’s pretty intent on not fucking it up.

But it isn’t bonding. They’re just... acquaintances. Who talk. Like, a lot, because Peter comes in at least four times a week needing treatment for something, and that gives them a lot of time to talk. Maybe Harley learns a lot about Peter during this time, like his favorite song, and what his comfort hoodie is, and why he became Spider-Man in the first place. Maybe Peter learns where Harley is from, how he met Tony, and what made him decide to be a doctor over a mechanic.

Maybe, after a few weeks, they start having inside jokes, built not only from the time they spend alone together, but also from the months upon months that Harley was helping Helen treat Peter, too. Sometimes, Peter snorts so hard that he reopens his stitches and Harley has to fix it. Sometimes, Harley can’t stop laughing when he needs to have steady hands and he ends up hunching over on himself and wheezing because of whatever it is that Peter said. One day, Peter comes in when he isn’t injured, dressed in casual clothes with a few textbooks from his ESU courses in one hand and a coffee cup in the other. “I’m headed up to see Mr. Stark,” he tells Harley, “but I thought I’d give you this,” and he holds out the cup of coffee with a big, cheesy sort of grin.

“Why?” Harley asks, though he accepts the cup gratefully.

Peter shrugs. “I’d probably have bled out ten times over if it weren’t for you, and you looked, like, really tired yesterday, so I thought you might need it.”

He is tired—exhausted, really, because his classes may not be hard but there are some big tests coming up that he needs to study for and it’s hard to find the time to study in between training with Helen and doing all the millions of other assignments that are being tossed his way. He takes a sip of the coffee, hums in satisfaction at the way it warms him up, and says, “Thanks.”

“Least I could do,” Peter tells him.

So, maybe they’re friends. Maybe—maybe—Harley is starting to look forward to seeing him and keeps trying to think of a casual way to offer they hang out sometime, outside of the med bay. Maybe Peter starts bringing Harley a cup of coffee every time he goes to visit Tony, and maybe Harley starts to feel a little thrill whenever he hands the coffee over and their fingers briefly brush.

Maybe it is bonding, but it’s not a crush. It’s not.

(”You’re adorable when you’re in denial,” Helen tells him.

Harley sinks in his seat and tries to disappear. “Shut up.”)

—

The letters of his textbook are blurring in front of his eyes when the alarm rings.

He jumps at the sound, looks up at the ceiling with slightly squinted eyes and furrowed brows, expecting Friday to calmly inform him that his assistance is needed in the med bay, like usual. Instead of that, though, the alarm continues to blare, and all Friday says is, “Urgent. Urgent. Urgent.”

Which is code for: someone’s about to die if he doesn’t hurry.

Instantly, he jumps to his feet, feeling wide awake despite being on the brink of dozing off just a few short moments ago. “Okay,” he tells himself, rushing out of his room and sprinting towards the elevator, which is already open and waiting for him. He only just barely thinks to swipe his tablet along the way, clutches it in his hands while he says, “Okay, okay, okay—who, uh—Friday? Who is it?”

“Iron Man and Spider-Man are both heavily injured and require immediate assistance,” Friday informs him gravely. “Doctor Cho is already treating Mr.Stark and has told me to inform you that you will be in charge of Mr. Parker.”

“Oh, god,” Harley breathes, pinching the bridge of his nose and giving himself a second to take a deep breath while the elevator takes him down to the proper floor. “Jesus. Okay. I need, uh—give me a list of Peter’s injuries, Fri.”

“Of course, Mr. Keener.”

The list is sent to his tablet immediately, and it’s—extensive. Third degree burns and multiple shattered ribs and various bullet wounds, only some of which are clean through, meaning that there’s various bullets that they need to remove before Peter starts to heal around them. The more he reads, the faster his heart thunders in his chest while his mind automatically sorts through it to think of what needs to be prioritized, what to treat first, and how to keep Peter alive.

By the time he reaches Peter’s room, he has a game plan figured out, and he only falters for a short moment when he sees Peter on the hospital bed, writhing around and sobbing in pain. The rest of the medical staff in the room freeze, likely already aware that Helen put him in charge, and wait with bated breath.

“Alright,” Harley says, mostly to himself. “Here’s what we’re going to do.”

—

Maybe it is a crush.

Harley is finding it hard to deny it now, as he sits beside Peter’s hospital bed, his hands feeling a little bit shaky where they’re clasped together and hanging between his knees. They had to undergo emergency surgery, and Peter’s heart had stopped four times throughout the procedure. Bringing him back had been the most panic inducing thing Harley has ever experienced in his life, and he couldn’t even show it because he was the one that was put in charge.

But they did, all four times —they got his heart going again and they got out all the bullets and treated all the burns and did everything they could to stabilized the broken bones. They gave him multiple IV’s, all of which he’s still attached to, and he hasn’t woken up since he passed out from the pain shortly after Harley’s arrival—and he passed out looking at Harley, too, with wide, pleading eyes that seemed to be begging for mercy, filled with agony and despair.

Harley would do anything to never have to see that look again.

“How’s he doing?” Helen asks, stepping into the room. She looks tired, undoubtedly exhausted from doing whatever she could to stabilize Tony just a few rooms down. Harley feels that exhaustion in his very bones.

“He’s gonna be fine,” Harley tells her. “Lost him a few times, though.”

Helen hums sympathetically. “But you got him back.”

Harley hesitates, then nods. “Yeah, we did.”

“Good,” Helen says, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You did good.” She stays like that for a moment, doesn’t move, and Harley appreciates the gesture but kind of wants to be alone. Maybe she senses that, because a moment later, she’s pulling her hand back and asking, “Are you staying here?”

“‘Til he wakes up,” Harley tells her.

Helen smiles at him warmly. “Make sure you get some rest, too, okay?”

Harley doesn’t think he’ll be able to sleep until he sees Peter awake and talking again, but he still nods at her and says, “Yeah, alright.”

After Helen leaves the room, after it’s just Harley and Peter again, he finds himself reaching forward and taking Peter’s hand in his, and, other than the innocent brush of fingers when passing a coffee cup, this is the first time they’ve touched outside of Harley treating Peter’s wounds. It’s a bit of a startling realization, but Harley finds comfort in the contact, listens to the steady beeping of the heart monitor and starts to relax with the reassurance that he really did good, that Peter is going to be okay and Harley is the one that saved him.

He doesn’t mean to fall asleep, but with that relief flooding his veins and Peter’s hand in his, he finds himself dozing off and doesn’t bother forcing himself awake.

—

At first, he doesn’t realize he’s waking up, his senses still muddled with sleep. It feels almost as if he’s floating in unconsciousness, warm and comfortable and— 

“Harley?”

And he wakes with a jolt, eyes snapping open and instantly searching, only coming to a stop when they land on wide brown eyes looking right back at him. “Oh,” he breathes, blinking once and sitting up straight despite the way it makes his back complain. “Oh, my god. You’re awake.”

Peter tilts his head, just a little bit, and looks down at their intertwined fingers.

“Right. That.” Harley clears his throat and scrubs his free hand over his features, trying to wake himself up with a sheepish little smile. “It’s, um—not important, actually. How do you feel? Any pain, discomfort, anything like that?”

For a moment, Peter doesn’t respond, just keeps looking at their hands before rasping out a hoarse little, “’m kinda—kinda thirsty. M’throat hurts.”

Instantly, Harley gets to his feet and pulls open the mini fridge in the room to grab a bottle of water. He takes it back to Peter, hands it over, and feels somewhere stuck between doctor mode and something else, the worry and the uncertainty and the fear from hearing the flat line all mixing together until he feels nauseous with it. Peter accepts the water bottle gratefully, takes tentative sips from it and only winces slightly when he swallows it. “Better?” Harley asks.

Peter smiles, a bit small and tired, but just as genuine as always. “Yeah.”

“Good,” Harley murmurs, hovering by the chair he had been sitting in before. “Is there anything else? Just, like—anything at all? How do you feel?”

“Tired,” Peter tells him. “Like, um... groggy, y’know? And... out of it.”

Harley nods, a bit relieved that the dose of pain killers he chose was the right amount. “That’s to be expected. You were really roughed up, Pete.”

Peter frowns down at his water, brows knitting together. “What happened?”

“There was an ambush,” Harley tells him. “I guess Doc Ock was out and about, so you went to confront him and he got enough hits in to alert Tony, so he went to help you out, but Ock apparently teamed up with Rhino and they were able to catch you guys off guard and get the upper hand. Rhodey and a few others went to help out, but they didn’t get there in time to stop you guys from nearly getting killed, so, when you came in, it was... not pretty. But, you’re both gonna be fine.”

He wants to say that it’s not a crush. It can’t be a crush, isn’t supposed to be one, even if seeing the way Peter lets out a puff of air and relaxes back into his pillows is kind of a... not so bad sight. He looks tired and a bit beat up and a little too pale, but he’s good. He’s alive. Being alive looks good on him.

Maybe, Harley admits. Maybe it is a crush.

“Thank you,” Peter murmurs, head lulling back into the pillows. He holds out a hand and Harley isn’t sure what the action is for, but he doesn’t think before reaching forward and tangling their fingers together.

Harley clears his throat. “What for?”

“Not letting me die,” Peter says.

The mere idea of letting Peter die makes Harley’s heart stutter in his chest. “Of course,” he mumbles, a bit stricken. “I’ll always save you. It’s my job.”

Peter squeezes Harley’s hand, falls asleep with a sigh and a smile on his face.

Harley still doesn’t leave.

(It’s definitely, one hundred percent, a huge, gigantic crush, and maybe... maybe he’s okay with that. Maybe liking Peter Parker isn’t all that bad.)

[seduceme-lovestruck-thearcana]

The Girl in The Blue Dress

Chapter 22: The Final Attack

@megatraven and @catlovingwitch and @aallotarenunelma

Heheh >:)). This is the end of this lifetime!! I believe I've said it multiple times, sorry if that's a spoiler lol. BUT YEAH!! I hope you enjoy!! It has fighting, emotions, and some lore.

And btw, this war isn't necessarily history based and written properly. and probably bad. I just kinda wanted it to lead up to Rose's death and I'm just saying that bc like...ancient greece's wars were different and I'm just giving that information lol.

There is proofreading but if something is off or spelt wrong, then my bad! But I hope you enjoy!

.

.

The next day was the start of the war. Everyone woke up early, still getting ready. Apollo felt ready, but that's because he was a God. He had this power always ready, but everyone else didn't. Especially, Rose.

He practiced with her even more that morning, and he could sense her anxiety. She was distant, giving short replies, and focusing on nothing more than her training. It had been normal recently, and he didn't like it, so when he got her alone, he tried to tell her everything.

They were standing in the war room, ready to leave for the battlefield, both already in armor, and waiting for the other to speak. Rose stood on on side of the table, and Apollo stood across from her.

"Rose, I know that you're uncertain of your feelings, but I have to tell you how I feel," he told her.

She didn't say anything for a few moments, her mind not knowing what to do. "How do you know?"

He paused and felt confused. "How do I know?"

She nodded and took in a shaky breath. "How do you know what you feel? It's too hard." She looked down at the table. "My heart feels weird and heavy, and I don't think it's because of the war."

He stood in silence, making sure she had her time to speak. When she was done, he walked over to her side and placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's hard to know, Rose. It's like that for everyone. This won't make sense, but you know when you're in love. It's when you feel a feeling that you've never felt for anyone else."

She placed a hand over his and slowly looked up at him. She had a small smile and her eyes seemed to glow a little. She turned to face him and moved his hand to be against her chest. "I think I get what you mean, and I think I understand my problems. Andy, I-"

The door opened before she could speak another word and they looked over to see a warrior in their armor. "Hate to interrupt, but it's time."

"We're coming," Rose replied. Her voice was confident, but Apollo saw right through her. She was scared. Once the warrior left, she looked back over at him. She cupped his cheek and rubbed his cheek with her thumb. "Live for me, please."

He placed his hand on top of hers and smiled. "I will if you'll live for me," he asked her. This would've seemed like an innocent question, a lover wanting a promise, but this was more than an ordinary promise to him. He knew she was getting to the end, or at least close to it, and he needed something to comfort him during this. If she promised him that she'd try, then it would ground him.

"I promise you that I will live today," she said with confidence. That confidence made his heart ache, but she didn't know that, and it was okay. She squeezed his cheek once and pulled away. "Come on. It's time to face this head on." She exited the room and he followed after her.

.

They walked to the front lines and listened as Anastasia said some few words. Apollo got to see the king standing amongst his soldiers, ready to fight. He looked at Rose and gave a cruel smile, but Rose didn't back down. She bared her teeth at him and showed no fear. However, Apollo drowned out most of the words and sounds. His mind just focused on how he would fight, what he would do, and how he could protect Rose. He knew she was strong and able to defend herself, but there were many soldiers here, and he promised he'd protect her, and he didn't intend to break it.

He only tuned back in when he heard the other soldiers shout as they ran towards them. He shouted back and readied himself to fight.

And fight they did. The shouts as soldiers clashed together rang in his ears, the sound of metal on metal hurt, and he got hit several times. The spears made it easy for them to attack him, but he used that to his advantage. When they thrusted it towards him, he'd grab it at the last second, pull the soldier towards him, and end them in a few seconds. Part of him was disgusted at this, but another part was excited. The rush went through him and it went on for awhile. He didn't know how long it was, but when he finally looked around him, he saw that there were only a few warriors left.

However, his attention was brought to something else. He saw Rose and the King fighting at their own part of the field. She was blocking his spear with her own, jabbing at him and pulling back when he jabbed back. He saw her let out a shout when the spear scratched her skin, almost stabbing her. It made him panic and he almost ran over to her, but he saw other warriors running towards him. He knew she could handle herself, so he let her fight her own battle and focused on his.

.

He let out a shout of his own when he ended the warrior below his feet, and he looked around to see many bodies and a few more warriors fighting, but far away. He let out a sigh and he knew his power was running out. He felt like using the rest to help the other soldiers, but that thought went out of his mind when he heard a scream. This was a scream of pure pain and he knew who's voice it was.

He turned to the direction where it came from and saw Rose on her knees sitting up straight, blocking the Kings spear with her own, and bleeding from her side. It could've been a mere scratch, but he knew it wasn't. He knew it was worse than that, so he didn't wait anymore. He began to run towards them, pushing many warriors out of the way, even if they were on his side. He saw them talking and he could imagine her saying the most vulgar things she'd never said to anyone else.

.

"I guess this is the end for this mercenary," the King said through his teeth. He pressed his spear down harder.

Rose bared her teeth back at him as she groaned at the strain. "Even if it is, you know we've already won."

"How so?"

Rose groaned as she pushed the King back in a sudden sprout of strength. He fell on his back and she moved to be on top of him. "Because you will die," she said with venom in her voice. She raised her spear in the air, the tip pointed down at the kings head, and was moving to end him, but stopped when she felt a sudden pain in her stomach. She gasped and looked down to see the King's dagger stabbing her. She looked back at the King and he smiled.

"This is your end and you should just accept it. Get ready for Tartarus!"

After a moment Rose gave a small chuckle and leaned closer. "Well, if I die today, then I won't be going alone. I'll drag you down with me!" She thrusted her spear down, it's tip landing right through the King's head. It was a gruesome sight, but she felt relief when she knew the King was dead. She forgot about her injury for a moment, but only a moment. Her hearing went a little fuzzy and she felt dizzy and she knew this was it. Her body had gone through enough.

She let out a breath as she fell to the side, her body going limp and her consciousness fading. The last thing she felt was someone touching her shoulder and pulling her onto her back, saying something to her.

.

.

Apollo saw her fall onto her side and he felt his heart stop. He ran even faster to her, and when he got to her side he got on his knees. He pulled her by the shoulder onto her back and looked at her. Her eyes were almost completely closed and unfocused, her breathing was shallow, and she had blood everywhere. He began to breathe faster in panic, but managed to scream out to the others for help.

He held her cheek and made her look at him. "You'll be okay. Live for me," he told her. He watched her let out a noise, almost a word, and close her eyes as she went unconscious. He picked her up gently and carried her to the other warriors. They all looked over at him with worry and surprise and ran over to him. "She needs help! Now!"

The warriors nodded and explained that she had to be taken to the castle. "She won't make it that far!"

"She will if we hurry!" A warrior said, her voice filled with worry.

He nodded and carried her back to the castle. It wasn't a very far trip, but it wasn't close and he could barely hear her breathing. He knew this was it, he knew this was dangerous, he knew her time was up, and he knew this was goodbye. She accepted death in each timeline, now it was his time to accept hers.

.

.

When they got to the castle, guards led Apollo to a medic. There was an area for treating the wounds of the warriors, but the medic knew this was serious and more important, so he took her to another room in the castle. He grabbed all of his medicine and tools and made Apollo lay Rose on a bed in a room. It looked like a guest room, but it was still safe for her.

The medic made Apollo leave, and he did, but he didn't go far. He went and stood by the door. He was leaning against the wall beside the door and began to think. His head filled with terrible ideas, horrible memories, and gods awful things. Rose was dying and he had to accept it. But he didn't want to. Another part of him kept saying she could live, she would make it, and that this one promise would be kept, but he knew deep down it wouldn't be.

After a few minutes, his thoughts were broken when he heard a distant voice shouting for people to move. It was familiar and he knew it immediately.

"Oizys?!"

"Apollo?!" She yelled.

He heard her heels click against the floor as she ran to him, and he was scared to see her. Her sister was dying and he couldn't stop it. However, when she turned the corner and ran to him, she didn't look angry. She looked desperate.

She grabbed his arm when she got to him and panted her words out. "Please, let me be the one to see her."

"What do you mean?"

"The doctor. He won't be able to save her, but he'll make her stable enough for someone to see. Let me be that person. Please," she begged.

Apollo wanted to see Rose, he wanted to see her so bad. He wanted to say goodbye to her, but he wasn't heartless. He knew she deserved to see her more than he did. He nodded and squeezed her hand. "Of course. You deserve it."

Oizys let out a sigh of relief and let him go. She joined him on the wall as they both waited. It felt like agony, but they knew the doctor was doing all he could. He was going through every method he could, doing everything he could to save her, and it took time. Time they were more than willingly to give.

They jumped when they heard the door open. Oizys got in front of the doctor with a frantic look. "Is she okay?"

"She's stable, but she won't make it."

"Can I see her? Please?"

The doctor thought for a moment, but nodded with a sigh. "She might not be fully conscious or even able to respond, but you can go see her."

She smiled and thanked the doctor as she practically ran into the room.

She opened the door and looked at Rose. She was laying on a bed with bandages wrapped around her middle. It went from her collarbone to her stomach. Multiple spots had blood stains and it was clear the blood was barely stopped.

She was going to die. This wound was the last one she would be able to handle.

Oizys shut the door harshly and ran to the side of the bed. She sat close to where Rose's middle was, and reached for her hand. It was barely warm. She was barely hanging on.

She took in a shaky breath and spoke in a whisper. "Rose, can you open your eyes?"

Rose groaned as if her voice was too loud, even though it was so soft, but she slowly opened her eyes and they focused on Oizys. She was slightly leaning down to be closer to her and when she saw her blue eyes, she smiled.

"Hey, Rose. I'm here for you." She said all of her words slowly. She didn't even know what to say to her. Yet, Rose smiled at her and squeezed her hand slightly.

"Hi, Oizys." Her look turned to confusion. "What are you doing here?"

Oizys smiled at the fact that she could still speak and realize that she was here. "I wanted to see you before you go." Her voice cut off at the end, her sadness slipping through.

Rose let out a little laugh that ended in a cough. "I guess this is my time?"

Oizys nodded and looked down at the bed sheet as she thought. She didn't know what to say, what to talk about, or what to do. She couldn't do anything. Her sister was dying in front of her eyes, and yet she couldn't do anything but sit and hold her.

"Don't look so sad," Rose said in a soft comforting voice. She sounded like a mother. She reached her other hand up and placed it against Oizys cheek.

Oizys looked back at Rose and she saw her eyes watering. It in turn made her own eyes water, but she couldn't let herself cry. She held them back and held the hand that was on her cheek. "I'll try for you." She leaned into Rose's hand and closed her eyes. "I'll always try for you. Always."

Rose closed her eyes as a headache started to form. She pushed it aside and tried to focus on Oizys. She opened them back up and took in a painful breath to speak. "Did they let you in here?"

Oizys opened her eyes and nodded. "I had to beg to get in here," she said with a shaky laugh.

"Dang. They almost never let anyone see someone."

"Well, I'd do whatever it took to come and see you."

Rose groaned as the headache came back with a sharp stab of pain. It was gone as soon as it came, but the headache was still slightly pounding. Oizys gasped quietly at the noise and grabbed one of Rose's hands, holding it against her chest.

"I know it hurts, but please try to hold on," she begged. She held her hand against her chest, right over her heart. Her heart was beating out of control and Rose noticed it.

"Your heart sounds like it's about to jump out of your chest," she said with another laugh. She was in pain, but she tried to keep things light. Like she always did.

Oizys nodded and smiled. "Really? I would've never noticed." Her snark caused both of them to laugh. They were like old friends even if they barely knew each other.

"I know I already asked, but why are you here? To see me off?" Her thumb stroked Oizys cheek to comfort her. She didn't let her hand go off of her cheek and it was a comfort to both of them.

"Yeah. I wanted to see you one more time. I wanted," she paused for a moment, "I wanted to know more of your stories. You're a mercenary, so you have to have some good ones."

Rose smiled and nodded. "I definitely have good ones. I remember when I went to collect fur for a woman, I went into the woods and got lost. But I didn't have time to just look around because I heard a growl from behind me. I turned around and saw a wolf a littles away from me. I jumped so high in the air and ran away. I eventually found my way back into the town, and thankfully the wolf decided I wasn't worth it."

Oizys smiled at that story. "I never thought you'd be the one to get lost. You're always the one guiding," she said with a fond voice.

Rose groaned again as another painful stab came. Once again, it was gone as soon as it came, but now the headache was a little louder and more painful. She pushed it aside once again and kept looking at Oizys. She tilted her head slightly as she stared into her eyes. "I never noticed your eyes. They're a slight red color."

Oizys eyes widened slightly and she nodded. "Yeah. They've been like that since I was born."

"Where are you from?"

Oizys struggled to find an answer. She wanted to tell the truth, but she couldn't. "I'm from someplace far away. I'm glad you don't have to see it. It's not that pretty."

Rose let out a noise of disagreement. "How could a place so bad let something so beautiful escape?" She gave her usual smile and Oizys's heart dropped.

"You've been there before," Oizys whispered out.

Rose closed her eyes as another stab of pain happened, and instead of the headache getting worse, it disappeared. It felt like a bubble popping and she suddenly remembered who she was and who the woman in front of her was.

Oizys noticed it as soon as Rose did. Those blue eyes of hers began to slightly glow and Oizys just knew she was back. "Elpis!" she gasped out.

Rose blinked several times before she finally could look at Oizys clearly. This was her sister. The Goddess of Despair. "Oizys...you're here," she said slowly. She felt like she was waking up from a long sleep, and her thoughts were tangled together. But she couldn't focus on it for long because the edges of her vision began to go black.

"Elpis?!" Oizys voice was loud and begging for her to come back, to hang on, but she couldn't.

Her grip on her cheek began to go limp and her body began to go cold, but before she closed her eyes, she gave one last smile at Oizys and a few words. "We'll meet again. I promise."

And then she was gone. Her eyes closed and her body went completely cold.

Oizys gasped and felt her heart shatter. "Elpis? Elpis?!" She called out to her in pain, needing to hear her again. She couldn't believe she was gone, she didn't want to, but it was clear she was. She was completely gone, and this time she was on the edge of becoming herself again. Her true self.

Before she knew it, those tears came rolling down her cheeks. She saw her sister finally, finally got to talk to her and almost had her back, but Fate wasn't kind to them.

Oizys let out a loud sob and laid her forehead against Rose's. She cried as she thought of her sister, the way she sang, the beautiful dresses she liked, and the person she was, not knowing that out that door, Apollo was waiting and heard her shouts of pain.

He felt confused as he heard her shout that, but he knew something was wrong. Something had slipped through Oizys, something big, and he had to know.

.

Once Oizys came out of the room, he asked to speak to her. He saw the tears still falling from her eyes and he knew this was bad. Something inside of her broke because of Rose and he wanted to know what. He wanted to know why she said Elpis, who that is, why she called Rose that, and what happened between them.

He walked her to another room in the palace. It was a spare bedroom and he sat on the edge of the bed. He couldn't relax and he knew she couldn't either. She was still standing, facing the closed door, arms crossed tightly, and he could hear her sniffling.

"I'm sorry," he told her.

She didn't say anything to him. Her throat hurt from her shout and it felt too tight to say anything. The only thing that escaped were quiet sobs.

He let her be for a few moments and he let his own tears fall. He lost her again. She slipped out of his fingers again. He turned his back for one moment and she suffered again. But after a few minutes he cleared his throat and did his best to be cautious. "Why did you say Elpis? Did someone enter the room when I wasn't looking?"

"No," she croaked out. "Rose is Elpis, you idiot." Her anger was rising at him. She didn't understand how he couldn't sense her power, how he didn't have any clue that she wasn't human.

"Who is Elpis exactly?" He was confused because he'd never heard that name, or he hadn't heard it in a long time.

"Like I said before, she's my sister." Her voice broke when she said 'sister'. That connection of theirs was hurting her.

"But how?" Apollo asked with confusion. He didn't know everything about family trees, but now he knew these were two goddesses he was talking about, and he had to know the history.

Oizys sighed and turned around to face him. Her arms were still crossed and she showed no emotion on her face. "We are both from Tartarus. We are daughters of Nyx. When she was put in Tartarus, she had six children. They have a father named Erebus, but then she had children with no father."

Apollo tried to intervene, ready to ask questions, but she held up her hand and he knew to be quiet.

"She had the Hesperides, and had twins. The twins are me and my brother, Momos, who represents blame and mockery. We are meant to go together." She looked down at the floor and Apollo knew she was upset.

"Do you still see him? Is he here?" He asked with curiosity. He didn't understand how this related to Elpis, but it had to. He spoke quietly, trying not to alarm her or push her. He didn't know much about Tartarus, but he knew it wasn't the best place to be, and it was clear it had an effect on her.

She looked back up at him and shook her head. "No. I do not see him. I wasn't close with him, anyways. The only thing he did was encourage my terrible behavior and make me want destruction. All until I found her," she finished with a smile. Her tone was lighter at the end and he knew who she was thinking of.

"You found Rose."

She nodded and looked out the window behind him. Her eyes were distant and she was remembering the moment, but it turned sad when she remembered everything fully. "I was living there with the other children, and it was dark. The feelings I felt were awful and it hurts to think about them now. But as I walked in Tartarus and lived, I one day found a girl." She closed her eyes and was running the events through her head.

"I was older, I guess I looked eighteen, and she looked the same. She was in a dark corner, sitting with her knees drawn up to her chest, her chin resting on her arms that were folded on her knees. She looked scared, and I couldn't help but walk up to her. I was drawn to her, and when I got close enough, she looked over at me and I finally got to see her fully. She had black hair, bright blue eyes that glowed in the darkness, and a blue dress."

Apollo smirked at that and huffed. "Just like always." He remembered every time he met her and what she was wearing. She was always wearing a blue dress and her favorite color was always blue. The only difference was that her eyes didn't glow and that her hair was brown.

She looked back at Apollo. "Yeah, I guess so," she said with a smile. She rarely smiled at Apollo, but them both having Rose in common made them slightly get along.

"I sat next to her and I could feel a warmth spreading through me. And I knew a coldness was spreading through her. We were both scared. I never felt that feeling before, and it was coming from her. At first it felt suffocating and I hated it, but after only a few moments, it felt natural and comforting, so I stayed. We looked at each other for a few moments before we talked. I told her my name and she told me hers."

"So she's just like she is now. Spreading warmth and love to everyone around her."

She shook her head. "No. It was more powerful. Just like me, she had an effect on people. Not just because of her personality, but because of her power. She was the light that managed to survive in the darkness, even with a dark force right next to her. She was born from darkness, yet was full of light." She explained Elpis's power to him, trying to make him understand who she was. Who she is.

"And we talked for a long time. I realized she was my sister when she followed me back to my mother. Nyx greeted her with love and her eyes lit up with a spark of something. I guess you would call it love mixed with happiness. She showed love to all of her children, but she never looked that happy at any of us. But Nyx didn't treat her different, which meant she was still in the dark." Her face turned to one of anger and her grip on her arms tightened. "It...made me really angry. I saw many of our siblings messing with her, asking her why she was the way she was, why she even existed, and I grew tired of it. Mother stopped it most of the time, but she couldn't stop them from following the urge inside them."

"Then how did you even get out? Isn't it impossible to leave Tartarus?"

"It is, but someone let us out. One day someone tried to take me and Momos to the surface. I didn't know why at first, but I felt fear. I wanted to leave to go to the surface, I wanted to be anywhere but there, but...I didn't want to leave without her." Her voice was shaky at the end and he knew she still felt fear from that moment.

"You didn't want to be without Elpis."

"Yes. I didn't want her to be there without me, and I knew that we could take anything as long as we were together." She laughed softly. "And I don't know how it happened, but when I was being pulled out, I felt a soft hand holding mine. We were surrounded by light and I couldn't see, but I knew it was her and I pulled her close. I woke up in a garden area soon after, and right beside me was Elpis. She was still unconscious, but alive. I felt relief until I found out who brought us here. Zeus came and found us and he was confused."

"He didn't expect two girls?

"No, he didn't. He expected me and Momos, but he knew she wasn't him. He was angry and didn't understand how she was there. I didn't realize why until I was told what my purpose was. My purpose was to punish the humans, make them feel the feelings I felt, make them do the things that I felt like doing deep down. I felt excited, but when I saw him look at my sister, my excitement was gone and replaced with fear once again. The king has a stronger influence than I do."

"And eventually she woke up. I helped her up into her own estate that was waiting for her. But then I was told that it was meant to be Momos and mine. All of it was meant to be for me and him. And when he saw that he wasn't with me," she paused for a second and he saw tears in her eyes. "He tried to take her away. He wanted to send her back because he didn't need her, he only wanted to punish the humans, but she wanted something different. She didn't even meet one yet, but she knew she wanted to protect them. She wanted to help them. She wanted the opposite of what I did, but I still didn't want her to leave." Her voice was tight and she was holding back more tears.

"That's when I met Aphrodite and Hades. They were with him and managed to calm him down and say that she could stay there. But only there. She couldn't go to the humans, she couldn't go do what she wanted. She could live on Olympus and effect them in any way she wanted, but they didn't need any more. They had enough. If she wasn't with me and didn't spread her own effect on humans, then the world would be a terrible, terrible place."

"Then, how did she do it? Zeus is very strict and the Gods follow his every will."

Her face went back to anger and she scoffed. "Well, I don't. I went to the world and I did what I did. I spread terrible things and I saw the world begin to turn into a dark place. It didn't happen instantly, but it slowly happened. I witnessed terrible things, and...I didn't want to anymore. Even I couldn't take that much. I went to her and managed to sneak her out. She was scared, but I comforted her and she was so happy. She met a few of the people in one town, and they smiled at her. I saw happiness in her and she seemed to glow. She spent time with them everyday and her idea was spreading."

"Idea?"

"The concept of Hope. The concept that the world isn't just despair, death, misery, and tragedy. They learned that the world is full of light, too, and they just needed to find it. And she helped them find it. She brought it to them and they accepted that hope and faith with no hesitation. It made me feel happy for once in awhile and I loved seeing her happy. I made sure she was safe every time she came down here." She smiled as she remembered every memory of her with the people, of her with her sister, and her living with her. Being with her.

"But, I eventually realized that my presence wasn't that great. The people feared me when I wasn't with Elpis, and I liked it. I liked that they still had fear in them, while also having hope and happiness. But I know my sister didn't exactly like that. She wanted just hope in this world with no sadness, but she knew that was not possible. And she didn't hate me for it either, she loved me no matter what. I could see it on her face every time she saw me. She knew I made people scared, but she still wanted to include me in every thing she did on the surface and on Olympus."

Apollo felt a pang of sadness in his heart. She found a sister she didn't know she had, let her into her heart, watched her get hated on, and then finally got her to a better place, only to realize her own presence wasn't good. They could be together, but they would contradict each other.

"I didn't want to hurt the people, I just wanted to make them scared and make them do whatever they wanted. My death, pain, fear, misery, and sickness only spread while I was there. I felt guilt, but my sister never pushed me away. She always invited me to go with her, to enjoy time with her, and continue to be with her. But I couldn't do it. I knew that I would keep hurting the people she cared for, so I left."

His eyes widened. "You left her?"

"She had Aphrodite and Hades and a few other friends. She had them! I saw the happiness on her face when we were all together, I saw it and I didn't want to ruin it. I wanted her to be happy, even if it meant I had to leave." She turned around to face the door, and those tears finally fell. They fell from anger and shame. Her head was down as she closed her eyes and remembered everything. "She was with friends, and I heard she was happy. I got updates from other divine beings and I knew she was safe. They always told me that she missed me, but she was safe. But then it went silent for years. The people stopped coming to me, but I kept living thinking things were okay."

She let out a sob and fell to her knees. Apollo got up quickly and moved to kneel beside her. Her head was down, hands were folded together on her lap, and more tears fell. He placed his hand on her shoulder, trying to comfort her, and she didn't have the strength to push him away.

"And then maybe thirty years later, someone came back to me, but not with good news. I found out that...she died. She was murdered by someone, and the gods didn't even know who did it. How is that possible?!" Her anger was clear and her power was slipping out again. Her voice was full of pain and she didn't care how loud she was anymore. "And I learned that I have a niece! She has a daughter that I had no idea about. And Elpis tried to find me. She TRIED APOLLO! But they stopped her from going, they were afraid of her getting hurt, and I understand it, but why did no one come to me? I would've come back, but they didn't want me back!"

She banged her fists against the floor and sniffled. "But they didn't let her go. They knew my presence was bad, and they made sure I stayed and did my job like I was supposed to. I was supposed to cause chaos, and how could I cause chaos if I wasn't on the surface? They stopped me from seeing my sister and the next time I even hear her name, I find out she's DEAD!" She banged her fists against the floor again, pain going through them. "And I couldn't do anything...I just had to accept the fact that she was dead. I didn't know what to do...". She sniffled and coughed from the pain in her throat. "So I didn't do anything. I just...lived. I kept moving from place to place, never staying, never meeting new people, just letting my presence be known. I enjoyed it, but I also hated it."

She went silent for a few minutes, but eventually continued. She sounded tired and pained, and her power was back in control. "I was alone for so long. Until one day I felt it again. I felt that warmth come back into my life. It was there, but it was distant. She was distant, but somewhere. I couldn't find her, but you did." She looked up at him and had a look of despair. "I couldn't find her, but you did. You helped her, but at the same time doomed her. I found her the third time when she was in the war. I was proud that she was still trying to find peace, but I also felt proud that she accepted not everything can be peaceful. She was learning, but I wasn't there. And then I found out she was cursed. I learned that she had already died twice."

She looked back at the ground and banged her fists against the ground. "I found out she was cursed and I couldn't do anything. I STILL can't do anything."

It went silent for a few minutes and Apollo wanted to say something, but he didn't know what to say. He dealt with losing Rose, but Oizys dealt with losing her when she wasn't there. She didn't know how she died, why she died, she just knew she was dead, and she dealt with the grief hard. She didn't have anyone to go to, but he did. She felt the pain more than he ever could. And he would never suffer the way she does.

"I'm sorry," he whispered out. It was the only thing he knew how to say. It became a common thing for him to say.

Oizys didn't say anything in return, she only kept trying to pull herself together. And when she did, she stood up slowly and wiped her face. "Do not be sorry. We can't change what has already happened. We can only try to change the future." She sighed and walked out the room. She closed the door quietly and Apollo was left with the silence in the room.

He felt relief, sadness, and still confusion. Relief because he now knew who the mystery woman was. He knew why she looked like Rose. It's because she is Rose, but her real name is Elpis. She is a Goddess, who died at someone's hand, which caused the sadness. But then he was hit with confusion because...how did a human kill a Goddess? Why didn't Elpis find her sister? Why didn't they let her leave? Who is her daughter? How doesn't Olympus know who killed her? Many questions went through his mind and he knew he had to go to Olympus to find out.

.

.

SOOO!!! I!! LOVE!! THIS CHAPTER!! I hope y'all enjoyed it too >:)). There's a lot of sadness but also a little bit of lore. I was going to include another scene with Olympus after Oizys explaining to Apollo, but I changed my mind because this is already long enough lol. But yeah I hope you like it! It took me too long to think of the fight scene but it only took me like an hour today. Weird but yeah-

Once again: I did proofread but I could miss things, so sorry if something is wrong or messed up.

[lovenona]

LONG ask ahead, sorry T^T

*arrives in a hurry after 2-3 days* *slow, appreciative clap at the ted talk* sweetie, have you got any idea how much i adore hearing you ramble about the creation process??? seeing the whole love and dedication you hold for the odyssey makes my day! (and nooo, i'm totally not reading it again bc i want to have all of it in mind for tomorrow and bc it inspires me to no end hahaha what do you mean :) )

here comes yet another question: what kind of powers do you possess to write so beautifully. your writing literally punches me in the gut every single time, even the simplest of things!! it's hauntingly beautiful and i'm living for it!

(and another one) how did you find out how the odyssey was going to end?

also, it's rambling time because i've been thinking. (i do that sometimes.) each chapter title is a reference to a greek myth, and, in particular, odysseus' myth (no clue if i've written his name right, i've always knew him as "ulysse" in my mother tongue ^^;). and so my brain went: oooh nice, greek lore ^^ and then: yo wait. hold up. which brings me here: analysing the chapter titles. (bear with me please, and feel free to ignore my enthusiastic rambling/correct me if i'm wrong which i probs will)

so first, we have the prelude. david and calypso. while i'm sure david has his importance it's almost 1 am as i'm typing this so i'm going to focus on calypso. poor nymph is stuck in an island because of the will of gods for a reason i've forgotten. but here's the catch: while she cannot leave, others can come to her (good ol' odysseus for instance) until they leave her all alone again. and the cycle unfolds again and again. which brings us to a nice parallel with reader's situation at the beginnig. she, after all, is stuck on an island with no way out but stories. comes the dilf supreme toji aka an odysseus of sorts, until he leaves her. so she's alone again. calypso there illustrates a passive state of sorts. she cannot leave, or so she thinks: while she wants to, we don't see her try per se until sukuna comes in.

ah yes. sukuna’s arrival. chapter title: neptune’s hands. Neptune, god of the seas, all powerful, also known as Poseidon absolutely terrifying if provoked — which is something Odysseus did! well, man is smart enough not to do it to his face. but he did stab a cyclope, which happened to be neptune’s son. son who swore to a haughty Odysseus that he’d pay for it. in consequence: instead of going back to Ithaca without that much of trouble, Neptune goes: nope mate, and promptly sabotage his return (with a storm who leads his ship astray if my memory is correct). Neptune serves as a catalyst in here, to properly start the action. and it so happens to be sukuna’s role! he is, as well, the one who starts reader’s journey — well, odyssey in this case ;) — by making her this offer. plus, if we consider reader as being calypso, a nymph, and sukuna as being Neptune, a god, it shows their difference in power. sukuna is a fearsome curse, captain whose name is enough to strike fear in the cruellest pirate, who can and will kill reader should he get bored of her. reader is but a printer’s apprentice, so weak compared to him it hurts.

ah, yes. the narcissus pool aka siren gojo, aka me simping so hard for this man I might squirt with the mere mention of him. yes, siren gojo is that powerful, feel free to lure me in with them baby blues sweetie *blows him a kiss* hem. anyway. long story short, an oracle said: if narcissus sees his reflection, he’ll die. people prevent him from seeing himself. ofc man is so handsome it hurts and has women and men alike running after him, including a nymph named echo. he rejects her. hera is somehow involved in the mess and makes it so that he stumbles upon a river and sees himself. entranced by his beauty, he desperately tries to reach himself and stays near the river until he dies. this one is a bit trickier (especially considering I’m writing this as I go with no coherent preparation whatsoever but damn if I’m not having fun). but. *proceeds to read it again* *sighs in ‘why the hell ain’t siren!gojo real pls sir take me’* anyway. it’s never mentioned in narcissus’ myth, but I’m pretty sure he was tempted to look at himself. at least once, considering he could wonder why on earth all those people kept falling for his looks. (or he could be pretty dumb. let’s say he isn’t) so he’s tempted by his own reflection. just like reader’s tempted to follow segsy siren gojo. he doesn’t up until hera is involved and ends up seeing his reflection. he falls. not literally, but in love — with his own self. here it’s different (and the reason why i’m strugglingTM to gather coherent thoughts). gojo is the very embodiment of this temptation — so he acts as narcissus’ reflection here. he’s the one seducing reader, the one luring her until she falls in the waters, just like narcissus did. she didn’t die though, unlike him. (thank you sukuna. I guess. yes I would’ve given my life for gojo to consume me in both ways and??) now, this is very simp-tainted (sorry bout that ^^;) and the thing I’ve noticed is this: narcissus isn’t a character in the og odyssey. could it be bc to my absolute despair, gojo’s not as much of an important character as sukuna and toji? only you know!

(the hades, psyche analysis comes in tomorrow *looks @ time* *sees it's 1 AM* well, later on! have a lovely night/day!)

- the LRE (who's very happy tumblr allowed her to do paragraph breaks/to have a pirate history book recommandation! thanks about that one btw, it'll come in handy for a ff of mine (yeah it involves pirate gojo))

wait this is so precious n thoughtful oh my gosh 😭 thoughts n vibes under the cut :’) 

first of all THANK U!!!??? ur making me blush out here omg my hEART 😭 

as for ur first question, ur SO SWEET n IM LOSING IT bye i genuinely don’t know i just scream and throw a bunch of commas and metaphors everywhere and somehow things happen 💀 i read a lot (english major vibes) and it’s very helpful because i tend to imitate writers/phrases/books that inspire me while i'm figuring out how i want to write !! 

secondly: how did i figure out the ending of the odyssey??

answer: i think i just stumbled across this one 😭 i was brainstorming w my bestie (@/suedebunn) n she originally suggested a different version of the ending that i was like “oh wait” and then i played with it for awhile until i arrived at the version i have now ! i want to tell u more about how i arrived from point A to point B and what the process was but i will withhold because i am not giving anything away >:)

onto ur TITLE ANALYSIS!! this is SPECTACULAR! ur pretty much on the nose for all of them god damn i don’t have much to add :’) i’ll give u some of my takes tho!!

david and calypso – ur absolutely on the nose for the calypso aspect; david’s just a passing nod to the pirates of the caribbean portrayal of davy jones and the doomed relationship between him and calypso (mirroring the doomed relationship between toji and reader since he leaves them) 

neptune’s hands – yes! yeah! sexy! pirate sukuna is being compared to a sea god!! also a minor teaser but sukuna’s hands are important symbolically ;-) 

narcissus pool – ur brain is so big here god damn 🤲 narcissus is more of a loose reference to the idea of pride/ temptation and also hollowness/mirages (the emptiness of a reflection versus the tangibility of the real thing) so it’s not immediately a reference to the odyssey itself or even the myth (i'm taking creative liberties bye homer) but probably the best entity to use when describing gojo – the dichotomy between pride/emptiness is a lot more apparent in part 5 

gosh thank u sm for this!! excited to see what u have next!!!!!!

[generallynerdy]

High On the Burn (Carol Danvers X F!Soulmate!Reader)

Summary: In a post-Snap universe, the last thing (Y/N) (L/N) and Carol Danvers want is to meet their Soulmate. But in a very punctual fashion, fate decides to play with matches.

Requested by Anon: See your Steve Rogers soulmate fic has me hooked on the idea. How about a Carol Danvers x Fem!Reader soulmate fic where the reader is a very powerful Avenger and they meet after the decimation but before it is undone. Bonus points if it's angsty because Carol tries to fight the attraction (on account of being scared to lose the Reader), and for short hair!Carol.

Key: (Y/N) - your name, (L/N) - last name Warnings: i have no idea how far into the aftermath carol cut her hair so sue me, Nova calls the Decimation the Snap bc its a superior name, ENDGAME SPOILERS, cursing, angst, that Gay Shit yet again Word Count: 1,447

Note: i think i accidentally created a new soulmate au but im sure someone has done it before? Where u touch and u pretty much get really high and overwhelmed with positive emotion, but if neither one of u wants to meet the other, then its a whole big bundle of Suffering. I may use it again in the future?? Idk. anyway this is really soft!!

    The thing about the world ending was that it wasn’t supposed to get worse.

    Yeah, the world would fall apart and people would struggle to pick things up again, but no one would ever have to watch half a world of loved ones disappear again. It could never be as bad as the day it happened-- or at least it wasn’t supposed to be.

    For (Y/N) (L/N), things were very different.

    Being part of the Avengers meant that every day was worse. Every day was another day you couldn’t save the world, another day your failure stared you right in the face and asked: “Why? Why couldn’t you save them?”

    The day Tony Stark fell out of the sky was a little victory. Their friend was alive and he had two more with him for the ride. Well, the second part was a questionable victory. For (Y/N), it was a loss.

    It was a gut feeling, the first time she made eye contact with the fiery-- literally-- blonde that brought Tony and Nebula back from Titan.

    (Y/N) hadn’t been around the first time the woman was really there, but as soon as she got the call that Tony was alive, she raced to the compound. She’d been following leads on Thanos, trying to find him, trying to find anything that could help her kick his ass. 

Nothing. There was nothing.

    But when she met this woman’s eyes, there was something. There was a spark, a tiny one, but enough to scare the ever loving shit out of her-- out of both of them.

    Sparks didn’t happen. Not since the world had ended.

    “Hi,” the blonde said, reaching forward to shake (Y/N)’s hand. “Carol.”

    “(Y/N),” she replied.

    When their hands made contact, there was a sharp burn. It was like fire had engulfed their palms and a sword had stabbed through them at the same time. Carol winced and drew back her hand, while (Y/N) practically yelped.

    It wasn’t supposed to be like that-- the burn, the pain.

    It was supposed to feel like a high, like a burst of colour and light and love, reaching into your soul and pulling out a new person you didn’t recognise. Your Soulmate.

    But this wasn’t love.

    This was hatred. This was a glowing ember of hatred, for themselves, for the connection they had.

    Who the hell met their Soulmate after the world ended? After the world ended because they couldn’t save it?

    And suddenly, it was worse.

    The end of the world was worse.

    “Oh, shit,” came from Natasha’s mouth as she watched the exchange.

    There was an awkward silence. The team would’ve dispersed out of respect, but social rules had since changed after the Snap. All things considered, this was probably the first meeting of Soulmates since the Snap. (Y/N) and Carol were the first.

    And privately, (Y/N) hoped they would be the last, too.

    “Hi,” (Y/N) whispered, the first to speak.

    “Hi,” Carol repeated.

    The feeling of being watched, being studied, sent the hairs on the back of (Y/N)’s neck straight up. She felt like a science experiment.

    “I wish I could say it was nice to meet you,” she said, scraping for words.

    Carol opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again. “You, too.”

    That was the only words exchanged between them for the moment.

    Well…

    For 6 months.

    Despite her initial gut feeling to stay as far away as possible from Carol Danvers, (Y/N) began to miss her. It was a natural instinct to crave her Soulmate, however twisted their meeting was.

    She had met Carol’s eyes for no longer than a second and she missed the feeling of them staring at her.

    It didn’t help that (Y/N) was constantly interrogated by Bruce on how the separation was affecting her. He wanted to see the changes that the apocalypse made on the Soulmate system. Was it so natural that even half the population dying didn’t alter a Soulmate assignment? Had anything changed?

    (Y/N) didn’t know and she didn’t care. Maybe Bruce was using it to distract himself, but she’d rather he didn’t. Just the mention of Carol made her heart rip in half.

    Carol didn’t want her. That was what the burn meant.

    Given, she hadn’t wanted Carol either, not at that moment, but her views had since changed.

    So, she met her Soulmate after the apocalypse and so everything sucked right now, but that didn’t mean she should feel guilty for making an attempt to love her. She was meant to love Carol, Snap or not. The apocalypse shouldn’t get in the way of that. Surely Carol could come to the same conclusion.

    Across the universe, a call rang out from the Avengers compound. A few replied.

    It was like an intergalactic conference call, with (Y/N) taking the place of Natasha and getting updates from the rest of the team. Rhodey mentioned a missing Clint, Rocket said something about a major war breaking out, and the rest was barely paid attention to. Until Carol finished her report.

    “Anything else?”

    “No, luckily, it’s just that,” Carol said.

    (Y/N)’s very presence seemed to make the woman uncomfortable. Or was she afraid?

    Hesitantly, she dared to make things personal.

    “You cut your hair,” she said in almost a whisper, a soft smile painting her face.

    Carol was taken aback by this, but managed the tiniest sliver of a smirk. “Don’t like it?”

    “No, I do,” (Y/N) stammered. “It’s just...different. Good different.”

    As soon as the words left her lips, she heard a snort from the raccoon on the other line. (Y/N), one of the more powerful members of the team, shot one glare his way that made him go silent. He disconnected, followed shortly by the others, especially Rhodey, who shot both of them a knowing, encouraging, look.

    “Carol--” (Y/N) started as soon as they were gone.

    “Don’t,” the woman said. “Please, just don’t. Don’t make it worse.”

    “It can’t get any worse,” she protested.

    Carol sighed. “(Y/N), it can always get worse. I thought you’d know that by now.”

    After a pause, (Y/N) nodded. “You know, you’re right. It can get worse.” Before Carol could be shocked at her sudden admission, she continued. “It gets worse every single day knowing that you’re out there fighting the entire universe and I can’t do anything but call once a month to make sure you’re alive.”

    “(Y/N)--”

    “I don’t know you, Carol, and it kills me,” she added, disregarding her interruption. “I know we didn’t want this, I know we didn’t want this now, of all times, but we have it. We can’t just not do anything about it.”

    “It’s better that way,” Carol protested firmly.

    (Y/N) scoffed. “Why? Why is it better that way? How can it possibly be better to let you die without having known you at all?”

    “Because it hurts less than knowing me!” Carol huffed, crossing her arms. “I don’t wanna have you and have to lose you, (Y/N), and if that takes not having you at all, then that’s what I’ll do. I can’t lose you.”

    “You already have,” her Soulmate spat.

    She had to wipe away a tear that made its way down her cheek, contrary to her wishes.

    “You’ve already got me, Carol Danvers, like it or not. And you’re already losing me,” she said again. “Please. Come back.”

    Carol went quiet, uncrossing her arms and changing to a quiet tone. “Can you promise me you’ll be safe?”

    “Never,” (Y/N) laughed a little. “But I couldn’t do that before this happened anyway. Just come back. Come back here and meet me properly, without the burn, without the dumbasses in the next room watching.”

    Carol laughed at that, eyes softening at the effect the woman had on her. So that was what it was like to have a Soulmate. It cut and it burned, but she was high on it.

    Despite being unable to actually touch (Y/N)-- Bruce had been working on that-- Carol lifted her hand. If she could touch her, her hand would be resting on her jaw, cupping her face ever so fondly. It was a small gesture, but it was something. Though neither could feel it, they may have preferred it to the intense pain of their first touch, that raging fire.

    “Please?” (Y/N) asked one more time.

    Carol practically melted at the break in her voice. “Okay,” she managed, not wanting to admit how the idea made her heart leap. “Okay. I will.”

    “Promise?”

    “I promise.”

(Requests are currently closed. I’m finishing up my old ones.)

Masterlist

[trensu]

Episode 14: The One where LWJ Sings to WWX, y’know, Like a Bro

WE’RE STILL IN THE BEST CAVE IN THE WORLD GUYS

AND WE START OFF WITH ~THEIR SONG~ PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND AS LWJ GENTLY WAKES UP.

And first thing he notices is that he woke up with his forehead ribbon on his forehead where it’s supposed to be (it’s right there in the name) 

Wwx: oh yeah, i put it back on you while you were sleeping. I know how nervous you get when you’re not wearing it.

DID YOU HEAR THAT?

DID YOU?

HE PUT IT BACK ON HIM TO SPARE HIM ANXIETY

(You can't tell me that LWJ does not low-key have anxiety. Nobody's that much of a stickler for rules without being constantly anxious about breaking them. That's just facts)

Also, lol, the minute lwj wakes up, wwx is all “ah, must be 5am.” HE’S KEEPING TRACK OF TIME WITH LWJ’S SLEEP HABITS LOLOLOL

Now wwx and lwj are talking Important Escape Details

Wwx: yeah, went back into the pond and it looks like the Murder Turtle blocked off the escape route

Lwj: you shouldn’t be going into the pond with your injury

Wwx: i’m not that delicate!

And then he turns it around and asks lwj how well the medicine was working on his leg (it’s all better now, i guess?? idk he seems fine now. wq’s medicine is MAGIC)

BECAUSE THEY CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER

Here we learn the official name of the Murder Turtle

Lwj: it’s like a xuanwu but not

Wwx: xuanwu?? *proceeds to describe what he knows about it*

Lwj: *is impressed and surprised*

Have more faith in your soulmate lwj. He reads! Sometimes! When it’s important!

Wwx: aren’t xuanwus supposed to have sharp teeth? Like Grrr

HE MAKES THE MOST ADORABLE GROWLY FACE I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE AND MAKES THE CUTEST GROWL SOUND AT LWJ. AHHHHH!

But also, he’s disappointed that the xuanwu didn’t have sharp teeth?? WWX, THE THING TRIED TO EAT YOU JUST YESTERDAY. BE GRATEFUL IT DOESN’T HAVE SHARP TEETH

Wwx: it doesn’t even matter what it is! It’s a big monster and if we kill it we’ll be Big Damn Heroes

So EXCITED and EAGER and he has this MISCHIEVOUS LOOK ON HIS FACE. Obviously he’s suffered brain damage

Wwx: and, ah, if it kills us, it’s okay bc it’ll be an AWESOME death lol

Lwj just stares at him LOL

His face is like, “this guy? This is the guy my heart decided to fall for?? Really???”

Okay so now they’re being all sneaky and gathering up bows and arrows that surround the pond and then they go back and get to work on fixing them and preparing for battle

We get to see lwj practicing the chord assassination technique like a BADASS

They come up with a plan!! Wwx will go into the Murder Turtle’s shell to coax him out of it so that lwj can then, idk, decapitate it with his Killer String.

(that’s...not how actual turtles work, but bc this is a magic murder turtle, i figure the rules don’t apply)

AHHHHH

LWJ DOES A THING

So obvs since wwx has to go inside the shell and lwj has to stay outside the shell they gotta communicate right and Ancient Fantasy China does not have good cell reception

Wwx: listen to me

And with that verbal cue, lwj does this thing that makes his fingers glow with spiritual energy and then taps wwx’s forehead which then has a little burst of the glow for half a second.

And TA-DAH! NOW THEY’RE PSYCHICALLY LINKED!!! 

THEY’RE SOULMATES AND NOW THEY’RE PSYCHICALLY LINKED YOUR OTP COULD NEVER

It must be a link that only lets them hear what the other wants them to hear otherwise wwx would’ve found out lwj is smitten with him right there and then, omg, that could’ve saved us so much heartbreak later on

But we’re not gonna think about that right now bc i don’t want to short-circuit my keyboard with tears

YUCK, wwx is inside the Murder Turtle’s shell and it’s SUPER GROSS

EVERYTHING IS ALL RED

THE FLOOR’S ALL MUDDY AND GUMMY

THERE’S LIKE, FLESHY ROPES HANGING EVERYWHERE

DISGUSTING

Wwx: ewww, it stinks so bad i wanna puke *chokes back bile*

BE STRONG WWX, YOU CAN DO THIS

And now he’s bumped into some dead bodies 

WHY ARE YOU PUTTING YOUR FACE SO CLOSE TO THE DEAD BODIES WWX, THAT’S A TERRIBLE IDEA. YOU WERE JUST COMPLAINING ABOUT THE STENCH 2 SECONDS AGO, AND NOW YOU’RE SHOVING YOUR FACE IN IT???

Oh noooo, now he’s found the Screaming Sword of Resentment that screams bloody murder at him

He grabs it and stabs Murder Turtle in the face which makes Murder Turtle mad enough to get out of the shell

We’re going to continue to ignore the bad cgi and ridiculously over the top fighting moves

...and the way he floats horizontally(??? somehow??) as the Murder Turtle tries to shake him off

My poor bb is hanging on for dear life while lwj does his Killer String thing

I LOVE LWJ’S DETERMINED FACE HERE!!

His brow is all scrunched up and his mouth gets all pinched and firm. SO DASHING LAN ZHAN, GO SAVE YOUR SOULMATE.

But oh no! The resentful energy pouring from the sword is getting to wwx!

Uh oh, I did not like the look of that grin on wwx’s face

that was NOT HIS MISCHIEVOUS GRIN

THAT WAS A MALEVOLENT GRIN.

I DON’T LIKE IT

STOP THAT WWX

BE A GOOD BOY

Lwj shouts his name, he’s so worried!!

And now we see wwx use resentful energy for the first time ever!!

In a badass move he starts levitating all the abandoned swords and staffs that littered the shore AND USES THEM TO STAB THE MURDER TURTLE IN THE THROAT

SO COOL, SO COOL

Murder Turtle flops over dead and takes wwx down with him INTO THE POND AND WWX IS UNCONSCIOUS!! NOOOOOOO

Lwj, ofc, rushes to his side as soon as he hits the water and rescues him

He gets him out of the pond and takes him to dry land

Lwj: wei ying, wei ying! Wake up, wake up

GUYS, THIS IS THE MOST EMOTION WE’VE HEARD IN HIS VOICE SO FAR

HE’S REPEATING HIMSELF FOR GOODNESS SAKE

HE OF FEW WORDS GOES ON TO REPEAT HIMSELF TWICE OVER

HE’S FREAKING OUT

Oh gross, we cut to the Evil Wen’s lair 

C’mon nobody cares about whatever’s going on there. Get us back to the important stuff!!! I am Done listening to evil wens ranting

AHH WE’RE BACK IN THE CAVE WITH OUR BOYS!!

WWX REGAINS CONSCIOUSNESS!!

Wwx: lan zhan, is it dead?

Lwj: yes

Wwx: yes? (he says weakly, in disbelief, MY POOR WWX)

Wwx: is it dead? (why’s he repeating himself, WWX ARE YOU OKAY??)

(I mean, obviously he's not what with the murder turtle thing but I don't think he can afford to get more brain damage at this point)

Lwj: yes, it is.

Oh and now wwx is telling lwj about all the screaming voices he heard from the sword and asks him if he was dreaming those up

LIKE HE’S NOT TRUSTING HIS GRASP ON REALITY RN OR SOMETHING!!

AND HE’LL ONLY TRUST IT IF LWJ CONFIRMS IT FOR HIM

BC HE TRUSTS HIM AND THEY’RE SOULMATES!!!

Lwj reassures wwx that he did not dream up those screams

(Somebody should probably check him for a concussion,jic. I mean those screams were real THIS time but you never know!!)

(Maybe concussions don't exist in Ancient Fantasy China, idk)

Wwx is all pale and shaky!! MY POOR WWX!! Lwj is rightfully fussing over him

He lets out a weak laugh (BC THAT’S HIS COPING MECHANISM, DIFFUSE THE SITUATION WITH HUMOR, MY POOR WWX) and is like “who knew that one day i’d get to see the 2nd jade of lan look so worried?”

IT’S BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU, WWX, YOU DENSE IDIOT

Lwj doesn’t respond but he does look away briefly LIKE HE’S AFRAID OF WWX SEEING SO MUCH EMOTION ON HIS FACE

AAHHHH, LAN ZHAN, IT’S OKAY, DON’T HIDE AWAY LIKE THAT!! I PROMISE WWX LOVES YOU TOO!!!

WWX: lan zhan, i didn’t think i’d survive this

He whispers weakly AS HIS BODY IS STARTS TO TREMBLE LIKE CRAZY

Lwj: wei ying, you have a fever

And then he brings wwx’s wrist close to start pouring in some spiritual energy

SO GENTLY, WITH SUCH DEDICATED CONCENTRATION

BC HIS WEI YING IS HURTING AND HE WANTS TO MAKE IT STOP

AAHHHHH

WWX: that’s so soothing lan zhan

Oh jeez, the way he sounds when he says that...

And omg the way lwj looks in the blue glow of the spiritual energy transfer

AS IF HE DIDN’T ALREADY LOOK LIKE SOME SORT OF HOLY DEITY, HE’S LEGIT GLOWING NOW TOO

WWX: how boring...why hasn’t jc showed up to rescue me yet?

Uh, rude much? Lwj is right there

AND HERE WE COLLECTIVELY LOSE OUR MINDS BC WWX ASKS LWJ TO SING TO HIM!!!!!!!!!!

AND LWJ STARTS TO SING TO HIM!!!!!

AND THIS IS WHERE WE GET ~THEIR SONG~ ACKNOWLEDGED BY THE CHARACTERS FOR THE FIRST TIME BC THAT’S WHAT HE SINGS TO WEI YING

AND WHILE HE SINGS, WE GET GIVEN THE MOST WONDERFUL OF ALL FLASHBACKS. 

IT IS A COMPILATION OF ALL THEIR IMPORTANT MOMENTS TOGETHER SO FAR

THEIR MOONLIT ROOFTOP SWORD FIGHT!!

THEIR COLD POND CAVE MARRIAGE!!

THEIR BUNNY LANTERN!!

BASICALLY EVERYTHING I’VE BEEN SCREAMING ABOUT THESE PAST 14 EPISODES

I’M LITERALLY TEARING UP

I CNA’T TAKE IT

MY HEART, MY HEART 💕💕💕

THEY’RE SINGING ~THEIR SONG~ AND I’M DYING OF FEELINGS OVERLOAD

Also, jfc, there’s no Heterosexual explanation for that flashback sequence…

Wwx: it sounds so nice, so nice, what’s the name of the song…?

AHHHHHH!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

LWJ TELLS HIM THE NAME OF THE SONG!!

!!HE PRACTICALLY CONFESSES HIS ETERNAL UNDYING LOVE TO HIM

AND WWX HAS TO FUCKING PASS OUT BEFORE HE HEARS IT GOD DAMN IT

IT’S LIKE GETTING COCKBLOCKED, BUT LIKE, EMOTIONALLY WHICH IS SO MUCH WORSE  WTF

And when wwx wakes up again, he’s out of the cave!

But instead of seeing lwj’s godly visage, he wakes up to that peacock jzx and is like “you??”

Jc shows up!

Wwx: where’s lan zhan?

Jc: he left

Wwx: he left?? But he’s still injured!!

Jc: so is everyone else!! And he went back to gusu so…

Wwx: but he--

Jc: A THANK YOU WOULD BE NICE

Jc: IT’S NOT LIKE I TRAVELED WITHOUT REST FOR 7 DAYS TO GET HELP AND RESCUE YOU

Now we got to go through Plot Things

We’re at Lotus Pier!! (where wwx proceeds to pass out again!! Get used to it guys, he does this a lot)

Then the yunmeng sibs have a beautiful moment together

Okay, we’re gonna pause here BC WWX IS SO FREAKING ADORABLE??

He gets all pouty and asks jyl to clean his face for him bc his arms are too tired and jyl does it bc she loves her brother

AND HIS ADORABLE FACE

HIS SO CUTE ADORABLE FACE WHEN SHE CLEANS HIM UP

I CAN’T I CAN’T

IT’S TOO MUCH

HOW IS THIS GUY AN ACTUAL PERSON THAT EXISTS 

Lol, wwx is like, i wish you’d been there in the cave with me jc, lan zhan almost bored me to death

What a liar, lol

Like he wasn't completely enraptured by LWJ's presence the ENTIRE TIME

Oh yikes, we’ve got some screwed up family dynamics in the Jiang Family courtesy of m-yu and jfm.

For the sake of my sanity we’re gonna gloss over that

Now that the parents stormed off, wwx does his best to console jc (bc his parents, double yikes)

Now watch me as a break down sobbing when wwx makes A PROMISE HE WON’T BE ABLE TO KEEEEEP

I’ll be your right hand man, he tells him. Gusu has the twin jades, but yunmeng will have twin heroes, he says

(WHY MUST YOU HURT ME THIS WAY, SHOW, WHYYYYY)

After wwx says those things about the twins, he looks up at the sky wistfully and asks jc “do you think we’ll ever see them again?”

“Them” he says, like he’s not completely talking about just lan zhan

jc’s like how the heck would i know???

And we end the episode with wwx still gazing at the sky, dreaming about his lan zhan

I mean, we don’t see it, the dreams or thoughts or whatever, but we kNOW IN OUR HEARTS THAT’S WHAT HE’S DOING

This was a Very Heterosexual episode. For that I give it 10/10 stars. I would watch that flashback sequence with him singing over and over and over and over and over and ov--

Return to Masterpost

[thrushpot]

sixteen

Billy Hargrove x fem reader

“A fic where you and billy are exes, you've not seen him for a while bc you go to different schools. Billy sees you with a guy all over each other in town and goes to a party that night to blow off steam but you're there with your new bf. You and the boyfriend break up at the party because he was being a dick. You go off with billy and spend the night with him” requested by anonymous.

word count: 4,147

warning(s): swearing

a/n: was gonna split this into two chapters bc of how long it is, but I figured why not. this turned out lighter and funnier than I originally thought. oh and I made the reader and Billy nineteen going on twenty. love the idea anon, thank you! tell me in my asks if you guys like longer fics cause I can stretch all mine out. I personally love long ones. let me know! also left the reader’s asshole bf nameless on purpose, you can put in any douchey name you want.

—

If anybody were to tell Billy what he would’ve seen when he went on an innocent trip to the supermarket to pick up his favorite frozen burritos, he would’ve ditched the frozen food and just order in a pizza for himself instead. Nothing could’ve prepared him for the shock, then the disappointment, and not to mention the utter fucking disgust of seeing you play Happy Housewife picking up groceries with a boy holding onto you by your hip. You were laughing with the tall handsome stranger, pointing at the sprinkled donuts as if there was something hilarious or entertaining about them.

Billy had originally been strolling through the aisles at ease, happy to get out of the house and go do something besides work, class, or going to the gym. Becoming a young adult for Billy meant chores like grocery shopping, and attending community college as a fresh start, also working at the car place down the street from town. He’d been doing good for a change, and it was a different feeling for him. Usually something (or in this case someone) would have him kicking and screaming his way back to his old self. Back when he was never anything but angry, sat around and blamed the world and refused to properly deal with his feelings, or think over his actions. However, college started and he met new people, strived to better himself not just physically but mentally. He even ditched his regular tough guy workout diet, replacing the protein shakes once in awhile and grabbing a case of colorful mouth-watering mini cupcakes for himself instead. He was hoping to treat himself because he deserved it, but this is what the world would rather graciously gift him: his ex girlfriend pawing at some douchey delinquent right in front of his face.

Billy reacted quick, almost embarrassingly quick, hiding himself behind the nearest corner with his back to the wall, his treats still sitting in the grocery basket as he cautiously peeked around to see if you were coming closer in his direction. Seeing as though you weren’t there anymore, he thanked his lucky stars and at last minute grabbed a bucket of vanilla ice cream from the nearest freezer section, because he fucking can, thank you very much. That’s what seeing “the one that got away” sucking face with somebody else at the store had done to the poor boy. The blonde anxiously tiptoed around the perimeter of the store, looking for your hair or that guy’s ugly face. After his target seemed to have vanished in thin air, thankfully, Billy sighed in deep relief and ran a hand over his suddenly warm face, coming down from the mini panic attack that you just unknowingly put him through. He thought you’d ditch Hawkins like you always said you would, find a better home to break more boys’ hearts and get a degree somewhere fancy. But then again, Billy remembers that there’s a lot of things you said you would do and ended up not doing.

“Hi, thank you for shopping with us. Would this be all for you today?” The kind middle aged woman behind the cash register asked. Billy scratched his head before forgetting if Max asked for anything or not, then decided whatever munchies she wanted could wait for next time. But first Billy needed to find another fucking store to shop at now, feeling like this place made Hell look like a playground with you and lover boy waltzing around, having a jolly time.

“Um, d’you think we could get this over with? ‘M kinda in a hurry here,” Billy laughs out of his anxiety, seeing the cashier woman take her time ringing him up. He squeamishly reached into his back pocket for his wallet and pulled out a few bucks then handed them over. She took the bills and slided them into the register one by one after scanning all of his items.

“Of course, sir. Would you like your receipt in the bag, or —?” Billy nodded his head and rushed to grab his bagged goodies before his name got called by a voice he never wanted to hear again.

“Billy?”

Holy mother of God.

Billy slowly turned around as if he were a kid getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar, and there you were. He didn’t want to make it obvious that he was checking you out, seeing if you’ve changed a lot or just a little since three and a half years ago. And you did. You matured quite a bit, got a new hairstyle that suits you, and you have a cute outfit on with your usual style that hasn’t changed drastically since you were sixteen. Billy remembers all your adorable band tees you’d wear, and he also remembers yanking them off of you when he took you to his room. But he probably shouldn’t think about that right now, not with you and your new boyfriend right in front of him.

“Uh... hey,” he breathes out, clearing his throat and straightening out his jacket, even smoothing out his hair like an idiot as if it wasn’t too late to already. As if he still cared what you think of him and his appearance. You raised your brows at him and grinned like it was fucking amusing to see him get so worked up and uncomfortable, still a bitch, then grabbed a hold of the man’s coat and gave it a tug to signal him for his attention. The tall, dark handsome man looks over at Billy as you greet him.

“Hey there, stranger. It’s been a few,” you greet him as if he were an old colleague or some bullshit, not at all like an ex who’s heart you smashed to pieces. It’s unsettling to Billy, and he knows something is up, like you’re not completely being real, not acting like yourself. Even if it’s been a few years, there’s no way in hell you could have tossed your whole personality out the window. “Babe, this is Billy. He’s an old family friend of mine,” you introduce the two boys and they shake hands, your boyfriend’s grip much tighter and Billy’s more hesitant. What the fuck is happening?

“What’re you up to these days?” You inquire, probably faking interest in how he turned out after high school. Billy knows he doesn’t have it in him to stand another second of this conversation, and when shit hits the fan, he bolts.

“You know, sorry but I really gotta go. This was great, uh. Nice seeing you Y/N, and nice meeting you Amigo, ” he snatches his groceries before all but running out of the store, nearly knocking his head into the automatic opening door on the way out, recovering quickly. Leaving your boyfriend confused and you feeling somewhat lonely, suddenly wishing to be sixteen and by his side again.

—

“Family friend? What the fuck was that!” Billy punched the steering wheel before he strapped on his seatbelt and threw his comfort food in the backseat. He can’t believe you, that you’d call him a family friend after all you two had been through. You were the first girl he ever actually found himself liking, and after you transferred to another school and dropped him like trash, you had since been the last girl he ever trusted, too. It was early 1983 when Billy was finally getting the attention from girls he wanted and having the time of his life in his second year of high school. You came around and made the first move asking him out, even calling the shots on what to do when you first started messing around, like the drunk on sex and hormones teenagers you were. You stood out amongst the other girls, he noticed it immediately and thought it would be fun to have a partner he could try out all the stuff he’d wanted to do. Practice was what he had called it, for when the time comes that his performance in bed actually mattered, since he was just a kid that went no further than second base before in his short life.

Things took a turn, and looking back now Billy should’ve seen it coming. Catching feelings and spending an awful lot of time together made him weak, made him more vulnerable than he’d ever been before. You fell for him too, or maybe you just said that to appease him, Billy doesn’t know anymore and gets a headache when he tries putting the puzzle together. Always missing what the point of it all was. Meeting him, smiling at him and making the boy feel special, feel like a real man even at the tender age of sixteen. Teaching him how to fuck, how to make love, how to give head that could make a girl scream and beg for more, more, more. More importantly teaching him that it’s healthy to talk to people about how he feels, listening to others in return. Then out of nowhere, dropping Billy like a fly when you moved and never calling him back after you promised him you would. Like it meant nothing to you.

He had so much he wanted to say to you but you were untouchable. He didn’t know your new address to write you, couldn’t for the life of him look your family up in the phone book either. He’d never felt so hopeless, so alone. And it was a stab in the back that you never lived up to your word, promising you’d keep in contact with him and never forget about him. The then sixteen-year-old cried hard in his pillow every night for weeks wondering what went wrong to have you not even try to keep in contact. And to do that, to shove him away in a drawer labeled nothing by calling him a family friend... fuck.

Billy snaps out of the painful flashback and refuses to let any tears out. If he didn’t deserve an explanation or some type of closure, then you didn’t deserve any of his tears. He rubbed his eyes as he sped home, then almost forgets the bags of frozen food in the back with how distracted he had gotten. When he made it into the house, he heated up two of his favorite frozen burritos in the microwave and ate all his sorrow away.

As Billy finished up his greasy deliciousness, he wiped his hands off on his already dirty jeans and answered the telephone attached to the wall that obnoxiously rang. It was Tommy on the line, saying something about some banger being thrown tonight. Just like that, a lightbulb lit up in Billy’s head.

Hell yeah.

Getting drunk, dancing drunk, burying all his feelings in some college girl’s pussy and chugging vodka sounded heavenly. Anything to forget the feelings and thoughts he had that slowly but surely started coming back up to the surface about Y/N.

—

Pretending to have a good time when you’d rather be home asleep is exhausting. The day dragged on with your boyfriend taking you place after place, spending penny after penny on you in hopes to buy your love, your affection, and your time. You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair in distress as lover boy decided to take you to another party you weren’t too keen on attending. Drinking sucked and made you sick, your boyfriend hated when you got stoned, so that ruled out all the fun of these get togethers. You tried to protest but he was insistent on going, it was no use; he had to have everything he wanted, and damn anything or anyone that got in his way.

“I’m serious. Give me the keys. You’ve had your fun, now I can drive you back to yours and you get your car from mine in the morning, alright?” you tried to ask nicely twice already, but he either ignored or refused you. He was passed tipsy already, slurring as he called you names and kept whining about how you never want to have any fun. When you try to take the keys from his back pocket he shoved you away then poured the remainder of his beer in your face. Absolutely humiliated with all eyes on you, you grabbed the nearest full drink not giving a shit who it belonged to and did the same, drenching his face in whatever sticky contents were in the solo cup and gave him the finger, running upstairs. Knowing lover boy he probably won’t even remember what happened tonight, beg for forgiveness, try to buy you back to him. Not happening this time.

Finding the nearest empty room upstairs to cry by yourself then clean off the stench of beer from your face and your clothes, you weren’t quite expecting your ex from three and a half years ago to come stumbling out of the restroom, the toilet flushing behind him as he still struggled to zip himself. He had a cigarette dangling from his mouth too, looking about as “put together” as he did at the store. You laughed at the sight, classic Billy, and he snapped his head over to the sound and his cigarette nearly fell out of his mouth.

“You following me or something?” He asks, giving up on his belt and leaving it undone.

“Oh, actually I am. You caught me,” you replied, sarcasm blatant in your tone. You pulled the knobs to turn the sink on and cupped you’re hands to gather up a pool of water to wash your face that was still drenched in beer. Billy saw how disheveled you looked and wondered if it was because you were having a great time or a horrible time. Based on your attitude, he had to guess it wasn’t the ladder. “Is there anywhere you don’t smoke?” you ask, seeing as though he still smoked like a chimney even while taking a piss.

Billy chooses to ignore that, knowing you already had the answer to that question. Instead, he chooses to comment on your wet hair and beer stinking up your clothes. “Trouble in paradise?” He asks conversationally. You looked up at him and scoffed, giving him a glimpse of your ruined mascara now running down your cheeks.

“I’m not in paradise,” you answer vaguely, not wanting to bother him with the details. You just knew he wanted an I Told You So, but you were stubborn enough not give it to him.

“Sure seems like it,” he responds. You want to roll your eyes at the signature attitude he’s giving, but can’t help feeling odd by the fact that you two were alone in a room together and he still hadn’t put his belt on properly.

“You look like an idiot. Come here,” you beckon him with your finger and he doesn’t move a muscle, just staring at you with his sultry blue eyes. “Alright, have it your way. I’ll come to you, prick,” after taking four steps to meet him you yank his belt then strap it on the tightest hole possible, finishing up by lacing the strap through the belt loops. While pulling away, Billy meets your eyes and holds your stare, not even blinking before he snaps out of it and goes back to brat mode.

“Thanks, but I’m not a goddamn child anymore. And you stink like PBR.”

“Oooh, sick burn, dude. It was a Budlight, by the way. That all you have left in you?”

“No, I have more. You got time to hear ‘em?”

“Got all night.”

—

You and Billy stayed upstairs and got to catching up, also throwing immature insults like “you peaked at sixteen” and “at least I don’t smoke on the toilet.” When you both finally let up and started laughing at your past mistakes and not holding grudges because of them, that’s when the energy in the room took a turn and you now remember that this is the Billy you knew. The doofus in the supermarket that ran into the door. Now you both lay on the bed, the blonde boy propped up by the headboard still chainsmoking, and you on the other end of the bed with your feet in his lap. Billy’s heart sings with how much he missed this, missed talking and just fucking around with eachother. Not taking anything serious. It was one of the many favorite qualities he had about you.

“Shit, I can’t even believe you’re really here. Never thought I’d see you again,” he murmurs while looking down at you, playfully tickling your feet that were in front of him. You reacted by almost kicking him in the face with laughter, then demanded he knock it off to which he surrendered.

“Well, same goes for me I guess. I can’t believe you don’t even try buttoning your shirts,” you say as he laughs and hides his face in his hands, adorably self conscious. “It’s hot though, don’t get me wrong. I can forgive you for that,” you sit up and reach to tug on the collar of his red button up, before you suddenly remember how you got here in the first place. “Can you ever forgive me?”

Billy snaps his head up at the change in conversation, seeing as though you’re both getting to that point of the night. When you really start to talk about everything.

“Wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

You keep your eyes trained on him and scoot further up the bed right next to him before taking his cigarette from his mouth and giving it a drag yourself.

“Can you take me home?”

Billy turns his body towards yours and wraps one arm over your shoulder, as if protecting you. “I don’t know where you live anymore,” he rubs your back and let’s you lean your head in his exposed chest.

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” you whisper as he nods in understanding, taking his keys from his pocket and opening the bedroom door and opening it for you.

—

Billy drove you to his apartment and led you up to his room, which he kept much neater than he did back in the day. He even had a bookcase that was filled with the classics as well as a variety of horror novels. Posters of naked playboy women were removed and instead he now had his class schedule hung up along with metal bands and movie posters decorating the walls. His bed was unmade, but what made you laugh out loud was seeing three rolls of tissue that were crumbled up on his bedside table.

“What? I’m getting over a cold, you asshole.” He defended himself as he took off his shirt, not caring to tell you to leave as he changed. You had to double take when you saw the ink on his upper arm, where a cheesy old fashioned skull tattoo lay.

“You can’t be serious — this isn’t real. That cannot be real,” your eyes wide with disbelief and not asking for permission before trying to rub it off, expecting it to smudge.

“Nope. It’s totally real,” he goes on to tell you his experience going in and getting it on his eighteenth birthday after feeling extra rebellious. After his story was finished he realizes he forgot to ask if you’d even eaten dinner yet. “You hungry at all? Got these kickass frozen burritos, plenty to share,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you, and you agree that they sound fantastic right about now. Billy leads you back downstairs to the kitchen and plopping a couple of them on a plate and heating them up in the microwave.

“Billy, can I tell you something?”

“Uh, sure. If you wanna ruin our meal then go for it,” Billy answers, burning his fingers on the hot plate when he tries taking it out. The boy hissed and cursed, holding his sensitive hand as if it were a wounded animal. Still sitting at the kitchen table, you roll your eyes at his stupidity and impatience then grab the oven mittens from a drawer and grab the plate for you two.

“It’s hot,” you say obviously, stopping him from taking a bite of the sizzling meal.

“Yeah, thanks for the heads up.”

“I’m serious. We’ve been avoiding it all night, but I know I hurt you when I didn’t keep in touch like I said—“

“Y/N, stop.”

“No. You need to understand-“

“I said stop.” he snaps, quickly transitioning to defense mode, vastly uncomfortable with the change in subject. It was silent for too long, and Billy didn’t want to wait any longer for the food to cool, taking a bite and spilling beans down his shirt. “Goddammit,” he grumbled before you took the lead and grabbed a napkin to clean his tank top.

“You need a bib,” you advise.

“You’re not my fucking mom, alright! You ask me to to take you back here, make me feel like a child. You’re the child. You are! Go back to your snobby little boy toy, why don’t you? Christ.” he rubs his eyes after finishing his tangent, talking more under his breath about how “unbelievable” you are, and taking another sloppy bite from the burrito but nevertheless passing the plate to you and offering you some.

“I’m not hungry anymore, and I dumped my ‘boy toy’ right when he dumped his Budlight on me.” you quote Billy’s nickname for your new ex, then your stomach interrupts you by rumbling. He looks at you and then the plate knowingly. With a sigh, you grab the burrito and take a few nibbles before wiping your hands. Billy starts to stomp back up to his room before calling your name, pausing at the top of the stairs.

“I’m going to the gym tomorrow, Max is sleeping over at her friend El’s. You don’t have to stay.”

—

Billy doesn’t know what made him clam up so fast. Maybe it was how you still treated him like he was stupid, or that you wouldn’t drop it and bring up the breakup when he thought he was actually having a nice night. As soon as he enters his room he throws a pillow across the room and pouts before laying on his bed staring up at the ceiling. He surges for his back up pack of smokes and lights one up, the nicotine relieving him of his anxiety. Eventually he had to get up again to take a piss and when he exited the bathroom, there you were, waiting for him.

“Can’t get rid of me, William.”

“Who got rid of who last time, huh?” He blows smoke in your face with a smirk, happy about the cleverness of his comeback. “I already forgave you. Don’t bother.” He told you, strolling back to his room with his smoke trailing behind him.

“I’m sorry for referring to you as a family friend. Honestly, if he were to hear anything different he would’ve hurt me and then he would’ve killed you.” Billy stopped and turned around to where you stand, seeing your eyes brimmed with tears as you held your chest, trying your hardest not to fall apart.

Tugging on his heart strings since he was sixteen, Billy can’t help but give in.

“Come here.”

You fall into his warm embrace, with “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry” I’m repeat and he shushes you while petting your hair, holding you tight.

“Y/N, baby, don’t cry. Please don’t cry,” he pleads, not standing it when you’re sad and especially when he was the cause of it.

“I left you and I didn’t talk to you ever again because I’m replaceable. You could’ve found any other girl or... or anybody to keep you company the rest of high school. But you spent it moping about losing me like the fucking idiot you are!” you laugh out loud, and it wasn’t humorous. Billy leads you in his room and ashes his cigarette without taking his hands off you.

“Listen. No, listen to me. Shut the fuck up. I didn’t mope about just any girl, and I don’t ever cry and bitch about her leaving me unless she meant the fucking world to me,” he takes your head in his hands, wanting to make you understand.

“I still love you. Even if you smoke on the toilet and do all the other weird shit you do,” you smile as you sniffle, embaressed about getting his shirt wet. Billy assured you that it didn’t matter then pulls you close to his lips.

“And I love you, even if you still reek like PBR.”

“It was a Budlight that was thrown at me, actually.”

“Shut up.”

And now Billy can say he’s never been more grateful he went to the supermarket for his favorite frozen burritos that morning.

—

sorry this sooo long but the idea was just too cute for it to be a small basic one shot!!

[slasherscream]

cooking headcannons with poly Billy and Stu and their s/o? 😎 i feel like stu is the type to flip pancakes super high and get them stuck on the ceiling and billy is the type to just order in bc he gave up after 2 seconds

A/N: you’re braver than any us marine to be in a kitchen with these two

billy loomis x reader x stu macher  ft. cooking for (with) dummies

                                                     ——————– 

For this we are assuming you can cook and thus, fair warning, you will always be cooking. They’re not assholes so they’ll totally do dishes for you (Billy will. If Stu can worm his way out of a household chore he will do so by any means necessary) but why should they cook when you’re so good at it? Their logic? Unbeatable. 

They both walk away real fast whenever you seem to be about to “teach them” something. They don’t want to know! You’re the chef of this house. Don’t be grouchy about your designation. How about some kisses? Would a kiss make all this free labor better? Stu sure thinks it will.

Billy kinda likes rigid roles in the relationship because it gives him the illusion of stability. So you always doing this one thing in the relationship is like a security blanket of sorts. Please get him some therapy-

Express to him that cooking can be a bonding activity as well as an important life skill to have and you’ve got him! He tends to like lowkey “dates” and more than that he really enjoys “couple activities” though he’d rather die than admit it. It’s because he wants you to spend 100% of your time with him and Stu. Like some kind of exotic leech you can’t get rid of. 

Stu is gonna groan because work and he’s never cooked anything in his #Life but you can get him into the kitchen with both promises of affection and by strategically withholding said affection. He’s needy. 

So you got them in there! What now? Strap in for the ride of your fucking life buckaroo-

Billy has a lot more cooking experience than Stu but like….not much compared to you. At least in terms of quality if not quantity. Meat. Breakfast food. Pastas. Crappy soup. Enough that if he was living in a college dorm alone he wouldn’t die. Eats raw vegetables (and fruits) but has probably never cooked one I won’t lie. 

Only learned and figured out cooking because you know …MIA Mom. His Dad certainly didn’t buck up and learn that particular skill for the two of them. It was either takeout or semi-crappy Billy cooking.  

Stu, if he wasn’t living with you and Billy, would have scurvy and he’d be dead. No cooking skills. Can’t cook ramen. Can maybe use a toaster. Perhaps even a toaster oven. If you ever leave him alone he’d die like a tamagotchi but faster.

Takeout and fast food are his only saviors. He knows all the numbers to every place that delivers by heart and he knows closing times and menus too. He survived his teenage years by the grace of his Mother, occasional family chefs, and God. 

Start on the basics. Stu knows nothing and Billy is (shittily) self taught. This will be the most maddening part of living with the boys since moving in with them. They are struggling. You are struggling. 

They’re good with knives so that skill translates pretty quickly. Everything else is a mess. 

Stu you teach one skill and he goes overboard with it. Overzealous … if you will. So yes he will flip a pancake into the ceiling. He’s going to over-whisk/stir everything. And if you need him to chop something?? He’ll just sit there and mince it to shit. Anything you put in front of him. Minced to granule. Very proud of himself.

                               you: baby i needed it in chunks                                                              stu: :D                                                              you: nevermind. great job, babe-

He’s so eager to please he’s doing his best and genuinely following all instruction to the best of his ability. If you just hang in there eventually he’ll do everything you teach him to do just the way you taught him to do it. He’s a good student in that sense. Just… hang in there.

Billy can get all the basics of cooking down great. It’s the recipes and seasoning that’ll get him. The finer points of cooking will be his downfall. He’ll rage quit long before you can register his mounting frustration. 

The type to not want to do something because they’re not immediately good at it? Billy? Never.

Stick with it and he’ll actually enjoy it to some extent. Doesn’t mind cooking alone but only really likes doing it when he’s doing it with you. He likes the normalcy and familiarity of it. Moving around each other like clockwork. Little jokes. Playful nudges. It’s a routine he’ll start to love, in all honesty.

Wiping down a counter (he’s a clean as you go type) and you pop up beside him with a spoon for him to taste? But wait! It’s too hot so you’re just gonna blow on it for a second first?? He started cool guy smirking like “god look at them” but missed the mark and it wound up a sappy “god look at them” smile.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again he’s a sucker for domestic life. He’s trying to build a love nest and you and Stu had better be on board, eager participants or so help you god-

Stu is good at all things prep work. He can still barely cook honestly but he won’t burn the house down trying to make something basic. He shines at breakfast foods like all men who can’t really cook but like to say they can. Could he offer you a waffle? Grits? Some perfectly cooked eggs? French toast?

If he can be bothered to wake up in the morning before you or Billy he will make you both breakfast in bed. It’s rare because he never wakes up first. Sweet when it happens though.

Always very careful about getting out of bed but Billy is the world’s lightest sleeper so he notices instantly someone’s left the bed. You’re up next because Stu cannot cook quietly under any circumstances. Pots and pans and banging of all volumes come from the kitchen.

You and Billy always share sleepy smiles before curling up together and dozing back off, all the while waiting for your boyfriend to come kick open the door dramatically while bearing food.  

Billy eventually gets pretty good in general but he really enjoys cooking you and Stu’s favorite foods. These are things he can cook perfectly with his eyes closed. Were you moping today? Go take a nice, hot shower to relax. Come back and oh wow? Your favorite comfort food on the counter. Where’d that come from?? If you gush over it he acts like it’s no big deal but he loves the praise and loves babying you. Want him to stab whatever made you upset? Just asking! Just as a side note! No? Fine.

Stu cooks/helps you prep mostly so the “who’s turn is it to do the dishes” debate will be more confusing and in the end Billy will usually wind up doing them to avoid a secondary Great Stalemate (there was a lot of bastard energy in the house the first year of living together. it mostly belonged to Stu). Also does them because Billy’s a softie for you ….and Stu, admittedly. Why else would he not stab him when you all know it’s Stu’s turn to do the fucking dishes-

Billy wants to try and cook something new with you once a month. You guys don’t really have set date nights (billy vc: lame) but if you did this would be one of them. Stu loiters but rarely joins the actual cooking process. Mostly just hanging out in the kitchen while you and Billy work your magic. He will distract one or both of you with dancing and singing.

Dancing may begin as lighthearted and goofy but be wary and wise — he can get the drop on you and make it groping and grinding quicker than you can say “burning food-”. Billy? 50/50 chance on him prying you away from Stu and scolding him because you’re both busy or him joining in. 

You have all nearly set the house on fire because somehow Stu wound up on his knees between your thighs, Billy’s hands tangled tightly in his hair while he whispered feverishly what he wanted to do to you in your ear.

If it had been a scary movie you all would’ve been killed since you literally didn’t notice the small stove fire until Billy jumped out of his skin with a yelp of, “Oh shit!”

If you don’t live a long life with these disasters you’ll live a short but sweet one together.

                                                     ——————– 

[blookmallow]

uhHH well i finished rusty lake roots... there are still many things i do not understand but wow that sure was. a lot 

-----

oh. ohhhh i was right 

albert did get into voodoo

i mean really if you have enough blood to write a sentence with it i think thats more of a “there is blood” scenario but i guess that’s just semantics really 

anyway uhhHHh that happened,

oH god what the fuck ok apparently mary’s dead now too

i dont know what killed her other than like, old age, maybe. shock?? could’ve been a heart attack if she. saw what albert did to his brother and ida 

:( 

the kid with the glasses Was emma’s son and she Did commit suicide in her grief when he went missing 

still dont know where he came from in the first place but nevermind 

what the hell kind of egg is that (the second thing. the first thing is a potato) 

oh

it’s. it’s that kind of egg, isn’t it. 

is that what that looks like???? i was under the impression human “eggs” are like, microscopic, like you can’t visually see individual sperm cells and i couldn’t really find a clear answer trying to look this up and got kinda freaked out about it anyway (pregnancy/uterus functions fuck me up sdfgggh) but 

APPARENTLY, AFTER MURDERING HER (AND HIS BROTHER) ALBERT HAS DECIDED TO HARVEST IDA’S EGGS FROM HER BODY AND CREATE HIS OWN FETUS SOMEHOW HIMSELF 

I DONT THINK THATS HOW THAT WORKS BUT UH. ALBERT???? WE NEED TO TALK 

god fucking damn it i liked him so much and wanted to understand him and i still think it’s heavily implied he was abused and/or bullied by his siblings and he’s definitely mentally unwell and definitely had some kind of rivalry going on with samuel, definite “wants what he has” situation but 

i guess “murdered his brother and his wife, apparently harvested eggs from her corpse to Make A Child With Her after she rejected him” is uuhhhh not really redeemable is it :’   ) god 

or im not sure if she actually rejected him or if he ever made any advances on her in the first place but. definite “she belonged to me/should have been Mine” possessive behavior ramped up to 11 

i still think he needed Help and maybe wouldn’t have turned out like this if he got help and had support from his family but my god what a. series of events that was  

also this guy keeps showing up everywhere. i dont know what he is but i like him even though he may be some kind of shadow of impending doom or a personification of death 

BIG fan of the implication here that i may in fact have been a ghost the whole time, subtly influencing the events of my own family destruction in an effort to sacrifice them all to resurrect myself 

is that what all this is. did all this happen because william was haunting everybody trying to get the pieces to revive himself. was this man willing to destroy his entire family line for the chance to live again 

oh FUCK THE KID’S STILL ALIVE 

HE DIDN’T DIE IN THE WELL HE’S JUST BEEN LIVING DOWN THERE THIS WHOLE TIME. OK

how did nobody hear him calling for help or anything... 

guess what

i fucking killed the hand again 

apparently albert also knows about this??? and never told anyone??? fucking why??????? he doesn’t seem to be Using the dude for anything, there doesn’t seem to be any reason to keep him down here unless it’s just some fucked up revenge thing on his sister 

also i dont think it was albert’s hand that i stabbed Again bc he’s not bleeding when he shows up but 

is he the one who has been keeping him alive?? why. what purpose is served in keeping him alive if he’s not using him for anything. if hes just trying to get back at his sister why not just kill the guy or leave him to starve down here. Albert What The Fuck Are You Doing 

hey buddy!!!!! its u!!!!

i was wrong it seems like mr. crow is not a voodoo curse victim but is actually probably the first vanderboom brother. the not william one. i forgot his name :’) and i still definitely think william’s going to become mr. owl

i found this picture later (it was shown before but i didnt remember) (also has. puzzle stuff on it but anyway) its definitely the same suit thats it isnt it 

i dont want to go searching for the pic of the other brother and the one of mr owl bc ill probably just find spoilers if i do that but Hm. hmm.

is this how the revival ritual works. do u become a bird. is that why everyone else at the hotel was animals too

that would mean the brothers have already done the ritual once though and would’ve needed a bunch of sacrifices to do it before so maybe not 

albert’s bizarre science experiment child seems to be living at the house now, which i was gonna say “how the fuck did he explain this to his family how is she just Here Now” but then i realized i think she and albert might be the only ones left now 

ida and samuel are dead, emma is dead, mary and james are dead, leonard isn’t dead but i think he might be... out fighting the war at this point 

also that dog is still here and i didnt previously question why the cup was called “cup with liquid” and not “water” and i really, really wish i didnt know the answer to that mystery 

try to guess how this dog provided liquid. the answer is not blood 

rose helped frank get out of the well, not sure if she knew why he was down there in the first place or that he’s her cousin, and. well 

:( 

sorry things had to be this way, bud

digs up my entire family’s remains to make one hell frankenstein skeleton

sure 

o fuck i did it i got all the things

i like how some of these are like “gouge out an eyeball” and then there’s like “cut off some hair” 

some of this family suffered more than others for this ritual, shall we say

theres probably Reasons for each of the parts though like, frank’s hair grew super long from his years in the well, so while the removal of a lock of hair itself wasn’t really a Sacrifice/suffering on his end its symbolic of what he went through

william’s the one being revived so it makes sense to use his heart

eyes could be... Too Late To See The Truth about albert or something, ida was a fortune teller so, Inner Sight or w/e, also a pair of eyes taken from a couple

emma died from her grief so we have her tears

james... died from drinking the elixir? so indirectly his tongue could symbolize that?? i guess???

rose means red, she was born through murder, she got her bio mother’s red hair, we have her blood 

albert could be seen as a mastermind behind a lot of these events, and a lot of this was caused by the mental illness he never got help for, so we have his brain

leonard lost his foot in the war

the only one i cant figure out is mary’s teeth, i have no idea what that one could mean unless she Did die of old age and “teeth falling out” is meant to symbolize that

theres.... three teeth and she had three children? i have no idea 

anyway DONT LIKE THAT AT ALL 

hm. unpleasant 

the other brother Confirmed to be mr. crow but its still possible mr. owl is Not in fact william but he could be talking about future william when he Becomes mr. owl, maybe 

this is such a mess ok so william was reborn as a baby, the grandchildren looked like they were consumed by the roots but we see rose holding the baby so at least she’s still alive (and probably the boys too if she is) 

and this process also created the seed which planted the tree so... william’s death and subsequent rebirth also created the family tree?? i guess?? so his family was brought to ruin one by one possibly through him influencing events from beyond the grave, all to revive him, which started the family in the first place, and there’s definitely a lot of... “all time is one/timelines can be altered” not direct Time Travel but just sort of. time as a nonlinear web that the original vanderboom brothers seem able to transcend 

hm! hm. theres still. so much i dont understand but i have at least one more game left im not sure if the other things in the bundle are related to rusty lake or just other things by the same developers