#bc. youre not supposed to? bc you dont want to deal with me being crazy? you dont want to feel responsible if it upsets me?
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the way everyone acts about That gives me the most incredible mind reading paranoid you can imagine. Like uh. my brain is quite sure sometimes in a deep, deep, overwhelming subconscious way that everybody can communicate their emotions to each other like theyre genuinely connecting in a way im not and they all have a species wide fucking agreement not to talk about it unless someone brings it up first. bc its so powerful that once youve experienced it you understand why bringing it up to someone who doesnt know just isnt ok. the rule just is obvious and self explanatory once youre there.
#this is hard to post bc i believe it on such a deep level<3#like mentally? dont belive it#this is not part of my worldview#but my heart. who also thinks the universe hates him personally. who things god is watching with disgust and hate and disdain. cant let go#and sometimes it gets Bad#its gets worse when i think about it bc the 'nobody would Tell you' gets overwhelming#bc they wouldnt#you wouldnt#no matter how many times i posted this#this doesnt count u have to ask with your mind<3#you have to figure it out first#this is what im posting instead of frantically trying to get ppl to tell me That is real again lol#i couldnt handle it rn#nobody answering#nobody ever does#bc. youre not supposed to? bc you dont want to deal with me being crazy? you dont want to feel responsible if it upsets me?#or if i do something crazy#i wont#i have a feeling i couldnt. theres nothing that would matter#tell me if im crazy tell me if im crazy god fucking please christ above its been three years and ive never looked someone in the eyes and#had them tell me im not fucking crazy#it feels so bad. the core of the world is not real and it feels so sickening i dont have words#nobody knows what im talking about bc nobody has ever been as stupid and traumatized as i am. is the current working theory
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regarding your rant on frances design: TELL ME ABOUT IT. tbh i think all the designs peaked with beautiful world, and everything after that was just...discount budget versions of whoever theyre supposed to be. the beautiful world designs are GORGEOUS on their own, but compared to world stars? theres no contest. some designs i do like, like england looks nice, if not a little too polished, and portugal is really cute, but everyone else just got twinkified and butchered. and i love a twink! i do! but they look like they could be swapped out with my little pony designs and it wouldnt make a difference. france to me will always be a blonde with a ponytail, a little unkempt, with chest hair and stubble and flamboyantly manly with a touch of tragedy. thats france to me. not whatever waif they cooked up in the more recent series
// ok ok i can't tell if u mean like ''oOOOh tell me about it' as a phrase or u actually are inviting me to tell you about it but i'm going to take it as permission to ramble <3 but im putting it under the cut so i dont spam
okok so UR SO RIGHT i think the new designs are so OFF... like it kinda lost the plot. the characters are all weirdly polished?
ok im just gonna run down the characters i have a lot of thoughts about CUZ my god
ENGLAND!!! its gotta be beautiful world
cuz the early seasons england gets his crankiness on point but this design fits just how cranky and posh(?) he is, like he dresses like an old man and wears outdated 'punk' fashion, he drinks tea like an old lady.. it fits hes cute and expressive.
this england isLOSING hair where did his EYEBROWS GO!!!! thats HIS WHOLE FUCKING CHARACTER but also i really dislike the change from him going from a dirty blond to a bleach blond... doesnt work...
i want my man to look like he has a nicotine addiction, rugged and smug as shit. i think they leaned too hard on the 'tsundere' trope for him cuz hes not puffy cheeks with pouty lips hes an old man with a laundry list of war crimes
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ROMANO
ok. this one is a little hard cuz romano is good in ever season but he has these little minor changes that drive me CRAZY but my favorite will always be the earlier seasons
this ver of romano was a NASTY bitch he just showed up to be an asshole and i love it so much , i love his hair being dark brown with brown eyes ok , at the minimum his design fit his voice...
for beautiful world i think hes cute but i really don't ? like his eyes being green? like i dont know it just never felt right to me:( i like him having brown eyes
and later his design leans into the prev but when u look at him u don't see that one guy who REALLY doesn't wanna be here hes . too soft?
and the newer romano does have the bad attitude but now he's suffering from the 'progressively becoming a ginger' syndrome that a lot of hws characters have now
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RUSSIA
my pick for him is all over the place bc i think his new design is SO FUCKING CUTE like i wanna bite him and crocodile death roll him but i think he is SUFFERING from cuteness.... hes so . soft?
earlier seasons of russia showed up just to say some morbid shit and be brutal as fuck but he could also lean into being cute, thats his whole gimmick, cute but scary. his current design is cute with no threat.
i think beautiful world had that balance between cute and scary, he was cute and say mean shit like before and was ready to throw down any time america showed up, thats his whole deal. and you know at the bare minimum he's supposed to be fucking BIG and world stars makes him look like a fucking twink
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SPAIN
beautiful world was WORKING to make spain look good, he was ugly . he was boring. and then he walked in with a new tan and a warm hair color and the cutest smile (tho its hard to find pics of spain in these seasons cuz hes younger in a lot of them) and then it's just
what the hell happened here. i feel like im going insane but did his skin tone get ashy? like it looks more grey. and i know saying spain is 'tan' is generous but what the fuck happened. why did all his colors dull, why is his hair so . boring. where did the body mass go, where did the attitude go... world stars spain is very 'head empty' and not in a good way ....
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CHINA
one of the most overlooked characters but i love him
i think my favorite ver of him is still his original cuz i preferred him with dark brown hair and dark brown eyes and he's side part... it was so cute... and they swapped it for a middle part .... </3
like he was so cute ;; plus i preferred him as this kinda irritable older know it all character, like he was groaning and huffing and did NOT want to be there. but then he kind of got? infantalized(?) i think they wanted him to be cute but idk if china is considered one of the ancient nations by its own rules, then can we tone down the :333 factor on him a bit
like just comparing but this might be me raise hands at hima for this characterization. what did you do to my boy
like do u see it. am i crazy
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these bitches
these 4 just suffer from success in their OG and the beautiful world just made them way better (except i miss italy's darker hair </3) and then they just got handed bad animation in world stars
ok thats all i have time for rn BUT YEAH
#THANK YOU FOR TALKING TO ME ABOUT IT#I LOVE WHEN I GET TO RAMBLE ABOUT THEM CUZ I HAVE LIKE 2 HETALIA FRIENDS THAT I CAN TALK TO.... </3#mun talks#ohh tumblr fucked up my formatting ....L
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What do you think of MC x Wayne? The devs' most favorable pairing above all the characters, in spite of Stella being the #1 popular Li. Isn't he supposed to be our otp for the main player? I know that you don't seem very fond of Wayne lately because of how he feels and treats your main Li, especially how he is going to feel about that character's unfortunate outcome in one of the bad endings involving a character's death? Also, who will you romance if you are not together with Reese? Oscar or Stella, perhaps?
gotta be honest, this feels like bait.
first off - i’m so confused by a lot of this. i don’t think the devs ever said mc x wayne was their favorite pairing, or that it was supposed to be an otp for the player character??? the way the game works is that there is no “otp” for the player character - you can choose to romance whoever you want, or no one at all; it’s all dependent on your individual playthrough.
second - i don’t really think ive said that the reason i dislike wayne is because of how he treats reese. i mean, that definitely doesn’t help, but my main beef with him is how he treats the MC. he acts like you’re an idiot who can’t make decisions for yourself (but only if you make decisions he doesn’t agree with - very controlling) and denies the MC autonomy by refusing to listen when they tell him to stop doing things, like following them around or threatening to hurt their friends (which, in the case of reese, he actually goes through with). he’s also just an asshole, and i don’t enjoy the way he talks about a lot of people and creatures.
in general, his behavior and personality remind me of creepy asshole guys i’ve had to deal with in my past, and it kind of baffles me when people try and paint him as a good guy. he’s not meant to be a good guy. i think a lot of people know that and that’s why they’re drawn to him (and i get it bc i have plenty of villains i love lol), but I’ve seen just as many people who act like it would be crazy to want to get away from Wayne and the best course of action is to let him have full control and “protect” you all the time. like, if you want that for your playthrough, that’s great, go for it. but i take umbrage with the idea that it’s an objective reality that everyone needs to accept.
now, all this is to say that i do think he’s a well written character. i like him as an antagonist and i think the devs did a great job of creating him in a way that elicits real fear. love him as a character, but despise him when i’m actually experiencing the game as MC, and when people act like I’m committing a crime by disliking him and i need to change my opinion. everyone seems to get it when you say you hate sybil, but if you say you don’t like wayne, people act like you’ve confessed to murder.
moving away from that rant, this message is just baffling in general lmao. quickly addressing most everything else - i’m fine with the concept of mc x wayne, everyone can ship what they want, it’s just not for me, and i dont want to be told that it is the “canon route/best route” and everyone should love it and choose it or whatever. ive never really talked about stella so idk where you got that i would want to romance her??? she’s one of the characters im just not attracted to bc she’s not my type. i will always choose reese in every playthrough bc i feel like im abandoning or betraying him if I don’t, but if I couldn’t choose him, I would choose oscar, followed by kaneeka.
i’m hoping this is enough to end any more questions from you, because if you come back with more bait/troll type messages, I’ll probably just block.
#anonymous#answered asks#scarlet hollow#Wayne scarlet hollow#Reese Kelly#Stella Richmond#Oscar Gutierrez#Kaneeka Forsyth#wayne critical#<- black list that tag if you don’t wanna see this#though hopefully this is my last post on the matter#i just woke up from a nap after i finished a long day of work#so i’m probably a bit more on edge than normal
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ok now that i have a little time. time to post about my america journey. this ones about restaurants and service work. im sorry in advance but also im not because im objectively Correct.
dear american friends. tipping there is bullshit, retarded, insane, fucked up. restaurant service does not need to be that involved, complicated, annoying or intrusive. yes i understand the us kind of sort of runs on its service economy, yes i understand work is work, yes i understand often its corporate policy and yes i still fucking hated it. there is genuinely no good reason for anyone to be paying 15%+ ON TOP of the actual prices at a restaurant. yes yes i undeerstand the wage issue yes oh all powerful american yes you deserve to be properly compensated for your labors but the way youre also just supposed to accept random customers are the ones who owe you 15%+ MINIMUM (and some places had like an 18% minimum, for real what the fuck) is genuinely crazy to me. im also going to be real min wage in wa for all tipped workers is the normal min wage so you cant even bullshit me w the federal rates or whatever. its a crazy policy. it makes no sense in the vast majority of cases and it makes servers ANNOYING ill get into this also. again yes i understand the reasons people often bring up as to why this is the case but i still simply disagree this is the best way to do this.
also once again sorry. servers are fucking annoying when everyones angling for tips. sorry. i simply do not want to be bothered 5 times while im eating my slop or whatever just to get asked if the food is good or whatever. im eating it just fine brother please just leave me alone. yes im being a cunt yes im getting borderline misanthropic with this but for real i find it crazy, insane, stupid, that people will genuinely respond to this with like. the vaguest arguments about how if you dislike eating out just dont. bc like i dont dislike eating out at all but this particular way of dealing w customers is like. fucking crazy. i want...to just enjoy the meal. this is where i could get into the other thing that deeply annoyed me abt the usa and once again im going to be evil but its the fake nice small talk w cashiers or whatever like look. look. i am not mean in person. i believe treating people who are just doing their jobs in your presence with respect and dignity are absolute necessities and i prommy i am very nice to people when i am consuming products or services. i do in fact, say please and thank you. but bro americans go crazy with it and yes yes corporate policy yes this and that. but oh my god i was sick of it by the end of the trip even if i was also getting better at it. i simply do not think you need to exchange a minimum of 2 unrelated pleasntries to begin any sort of transactional interaction though and again im not opposed to hi, please, thanks, thats obvious and necessary. but to be fucking honest i dont want the beloved talented barista who made me a delicious espresso to ask me if im having a nice day. i dont need it. i dont need to ask it back either this guys just working like what exactly are they gonna say. they dont need to be wasting their time like this. i am there for coffee or whatever the fuck else no offense to them obviously but we all know this is true. so why. why bother. why bother with any of this. the third world does just fine without it. why bother. i think this may have been the thing i disliked the most.
#m#disclaimer. i tipped in most places i went to except one where i genuniely forgor bc i paid cash and it was my first day there#and i was expecting to tip similar to the way it works here but hehe it didnt work the same way#obviously. no hate to service workers in case i need to actually say it for some reason
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I love your otto brainrot. He's favorite person to gush about in this series. I also love your analysis about one of the latest chapters and regarding Otto! ust, chef's kiss.
Anyhow, I would also like to add a crack theory about why otto never talked about his dp allowing him to talk to infants too. In this moment, it very much be because, as you said, he wants Spica to be eliminated. But! We're thinking small here. My question morphs into a more general perspective; why would Otto, and tappei to an extent, keep such information about his dp under wraps for this long, way before these Spica shenanigans? And I feel like the author may want to expand on that regard. Because as far as the rest of the crew knows (and as far as I remember), they know he can only talk to animals. But that chapter states he can talk to any living being (?), which I think may hint to it being a bigger fucking deal than we may realize. Like outside the Louis development, as well as Otto's frustration development, this power in of itself can cause a ripple of what Otto's capabilities are, and to not underestimate it.
So, now I wonder, would tappei utilize this tidbit for more development about Otto's power? What do you think?
aa thank you for liking my otto stuff!! i adore him a lot and arc 8 has me even more fixated on him bc his development is so Fascinating.... and also my fictional character type has always been the weird fucked up ones with terrible morals HAH.
OK ALSO LIKE i love your crack theory to bits. i think like the idea of his capabilities being A Little More Massive than they already are hasnt really occurred to me if only bc 1. i have like one braincell at a time and 2. ottos unhinged anger and various ugly habits (ie: doing things behind his friends backs HAH) were smth i was distracted by (positive) bc its so fascinating and now Finally everyone reading rezero knows hes crazy For Sure and 3. i think like. idk ive always kind of thought that his power is like super crazy like once you think about it. like iirc theres the canonical fact that other people in the fantasy world whove had ottos dp have gone like insane from it, so hes Basically the outlier here. and also hes insane anyway but his dp absolutely has partly to do with it. not only bc it like affects so much of his life with the constant overstimulation he experienced for a big chunk of his childhood along with the other effects it had with how he was behind his peers for a while and it made him socially awkward and anxious - but also like.
animals Are insane. a lot. genuinely. and then you have a power that allows you to understand them and hear their voices all the time. (more under read more bc its Long.)
theres so many fucked up animal facts out there HAH so i suppose that could just take like a couple google searches (god.... if oceans were in the fantasy world otto might go a little insane with all those sea creatures if he ever came close...) but i always feel like ottos learned at least a bit of his ruthlessness from that. and hes Definitely seen and heard shit (dont forget stuff like livestock ahah T^TT or bug infestations or something aljsdfls or the fact that otto would probably be seeing animal friends eat other animal friends or before he even knew he had his dp he could be eating some cattle he had a convo with like twenty minutes ago and ALSO garf and fred have their meat pie recipe that they adore and its like. that meat came from an animal and otto has most likely seen them make their meat pie before). but like nature is nature. its not always. Nice. survival of the fittest and things just die sometimes (ottos made various animal friends throughout his life and Many animals have smaller lifespans than him as well + some, such as bugs, are more fragile than him) and animals take actions according to their Nature (even if its. Bad, by human moral standards.) and all that - so i think the double whammy of ottos dp and him taking on merchant ideals is very much partly why hes so insane fr HAH.
I WENT A LITTLE OFF TOPIC BUT no yeah i agree. and i just think his dp has always been such a huge factor in what makes him so dangerous - its not only helped mold him into who he is as a person (especially when you remember that the rest of his family are Normal People and he Very Much Is Not Normal) but also like you said. his dp makes him extremely dangerous especially with the new information that he understands babies. iirc otto didnt Necessarily keep that bit of info under wraps - at least not before he met the emilia camp, bc the text said something about how hed take on side jobs where he babysat infants and hed be good at it bc he can understand the intent behind their wordless "words". and i definitely think otto - and tappei - havent really said anything on his ability to talk to infants before this bc it just hasnt come up in much relevant context until now. BUT I ALSO THINK YOU HAVE A POINT bc this does open like. a bit of a can of worms. theres these 2019 tappei qnas where he talks a bit about otto understanding "intent" -
Q: Is Otto's Blessing of the Spirit of Words limited to sounds that the speaker understands? Can he translate something Subaru wrote down in Japanese, or something that someone reads out loud phonetically without understanding it's meaning?
A: He can't. It's a blessing that conveys the intent of the other person's words, so if you said something like "Honbaradaratodetta", it wouldn't mean anything. It's just that, if Subaru had been saying "Honbaradaratodetta" for years to mean "What's for dinner?", it would convey that.
Q: About the "Blessing of the Spirit of Words" that Otto has, in cases where the same word can contain different meanings, can he discern the difference? (The English word 'servant' and a servant from Fate, etc.)
A: It's not the letters, but the speaker's intent that he picks up, so he could tell the difference.
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but no yeah like........ ottos dp is specifically about Animals and well. humans and demihumans ARE animals. so it makes sense that it carries into humans and demihumans a bit so the whole catching someones intent thing is super fascinating and i feel like he could Definitely utilize it for more of his schemes?? esp when you combine that with the usual ways he uses his dp with animals - his power is Perfect for spying on others and gathering info in general. from my understanding of his power though, animals have to agree to help him, but given he can communicate with them and hes. well hes a good talker and also a bit of a manipulative bitch (affectionate) so like getting animals to help him doesnt seem like too much of an issue usually for him. so no but yeah his power is like. Off the Charts. and now we got big confirmation in the main story that he can UNDERSTAND PEOPLES INTENT BEHIND THEIR WORDS....? no yeah i think tappei will at least utilize it for the louis-spica plot things (ie otto wants her dead so hes just not gonna say anything about how he knows her true intent isnt to actually hurt anyone).
but i feel like otto could possibly use it for plans... or accidentally catch tidbits of info he shouldnt. im not entirely sure how, but. well. roswaal still hasnt delivered on his promise to kill everyone if even one person subaru cares about dies and Now roswaal knows that 1. otto plans to continue opposing subaru and emilia and keep pulling strings and 2. subaru wants louis to stay alive because he cares about her. it seems like massive emilia camp inner conflict is bound to happen at some point hah... the current situation is a ticking time bomb T^T and thats ON TOP of otto still working on restoring the book of wisdom... it all makes me wonder if otto will overhear a convo he shouldnt and catch the true underlying intent to otherwise innocent dialogue. or something like that.... or if louis's intent fluctuates in some way which otto will be Very aware of. if that happens. or if someone else somehow figures out ottos hiding the fact that he knows louis is innocent via his dp alsdjflsjdf. or maybe roswaal hints at his genocide plan and otto figures out the intent???? everyone is at a stalemate atm fr and im fascinated to see what comes next.
though. ok given otto went insane hearing the white whale..... well you could just fling mabeasts at him and maybe he'll shut up lajsdlfj bc using his dp (especially when overusing it gives him nosebleeds and headaches and pain and etc etc) against him is a Viable strategy to stop him among many others but like. the problem with otto is that hes persistent and Will hold a grudge against you if you wrong him. like i really do feel like he will hunt you down if you do which is the big Thing with otto. T^T hes unpredictable!!! especially now with arc 8 where hes been dragged through all these dangerous situations he did not sign up for and he just wants him and his friends to be safe but said friends want to save a whole country and NOW a sin archbishop alsdjflsjd.
like i really feel that hes so tired of things happening throughout his life out of control (remember his bad luck T^T and the way his dp used to fuck him over in his childhood? yeah T^T) that hes been trying to exert more and more control over his camp. bc like. vincent asking the emilia camp for help was nudged into that direction by otto. ottos also stepped a bit out of line by being hostile to julius and anastasia bc. otto that shit was unncessary aljsdlfjd theyre your camps allies!!!! and now ottos letting his camp be sus of louis by keeping quiet about her true intent. like otto is straight up like. hes kind of possessive of his camp isnt he? bc hes so fixated on making things go the way he wants (not that he wanted to help vollachia, but he wanted to help subaru and emilia which is why he pushed things in that direction, and now he wants to kill louis). it all makes me wonder if he'll ever have to use his dp against his camp given hes. kind of already doing that by lying to them - though itd probably be difficult to use his dp more actively against them if only bc they all already know what his dp is. theres no element of surprise there, but i think with the right circumstances he could possibly use it to figure out Something at least. bc like while he Does feel guilty, there is next to nothing stopping him from doing more shit on top of the shit hes been doing so far in arc 8 HAH. his moral compass is just literally broken and pointing straight down to hell. that mixed with his stubbornness and intellect and anger is like. well anyone going against otto is pretty fucked.
like. what is stopping him from sending a little bug to spy on subaru at all times. probably the fact that subaru and co. have a high chance of maybe noticing it and noticing that ottos keeping. too close of an eye on them. which would stop otto and his new declared "i walk in darkness" goal but all of this keeps making me wonder what lines otto WONT cross. and how far hes willing to go to do what he thinks is necessary to save his camp. and also what the consequences of his decisions will be.
but also like............................................... ok time for a crack theory of my own are you ready. anyway. can you imagine if ottos dp extended into fucking mind reading or something............ HAH.
#otto suwen#rezero#ask#this is a long response and it went a tiny bit off topic at a few points but i hope this made sense aljdslfjs#i dont have like. hyper specific predictions. but the detail that otto understands infants... and intent behind words in general... def#seems like a very specific writing choice fr. like tappei couldve simply said that ottos dp only extends to Animals animals. and not#humanoids. and i know tappei did the whole understands infants thing for the louis spica plot but like you im also wondering if he'll#utilize this part of ottos power more!!!#theres definitely a potential there. for sure.#arc 8 spoilers#but no yeah like ive been thinking about how ottos dp affects his psychology fr. like its not really talked about much past the overstimula#ion which makes sense bc thats affected SO MUCH of his life... but i also think that the. you know. understanding every animal ever is you#know kind of fucked up. once you think about it.#he got the ultimate cocktail of animal morality + merchant ideals and now hes got the moral compass of a chocolate eclair. except he ate th#chocolate eclair and then went welp guess my bffs new daughter figure kind of has to die haha :/#like. otto had to have understood death from a young age bc of his dp right?? like can you imagine. you see a bug crash too hard into somet#hing and you hear it die. you are like five. oh my god fr.
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Omg, your mom tried to set you up?!!!!! With butch women no less?!!! Im so jealous idk if that would happene with mine 😭 recently she was ljke "oooo😉" at me about my sisters bf having a brother my age. I actually wanted to just go crazy insane bjork gif in that moment. ☹️ how dare you have men liking headcanons (?) about me. Idk whwtt would happen if she found out i was a lesbian. Like she also told me about how excited she was for me to have babies. When i was 13. :|
Also i live in gender capitol like we get taught gender identity spectrum in school and all. So thats why im not sure about there being butch women (or girls i guess bc .. im still a girl hezjnsjs) where i am and i keep feeling bad about having radfem? beliefs like is everyone going to hate me or is that just how it seems online xhxjd or. I dont know if that makes sense
I wish i could just fit in and go along w it but it feels so wrong to me, ... nopee even if i think youre cute im not going to affirm that youre not actually a woman bc your hair is short and you dont wear makeup or dresses it feels so demeaning for both of us. But then am i just making a big deal of nothing ?
Anywaays. Sending love bc peace and love on planett earth. :)
lmao since ive been out for quite some time now, my mom has gone thru the stages of grief and she reached a point where she’s accepted im a lesbian (she would try to convince me to get into a lavender marriage regardless for the sake of image but im not willing neither is my friend she keeps trying to set me up in a lavender marriage with) but she and my auntie have weird kinda homophobic beliefs on who im supposed to date. according to my mom & aunt, there has to be one “girl gay” and one “boy gay” ie one femme & one butch. they think if im gonna be dating women then they should be butch or otherwise masculine women bc it “balances” both parties of the relationship. they say im more feminine & shy & cute around butches and become more “womanly” so therefore i should be with butches 😭😭😭
SO basically yes my mom would meet butch lesbians in bahrain (they’re v recognisable in my country & have their own label too) and would immediately tell them about me and then exchange details w them. ive met 2 lesbians that way but ngl neither are my type and both have some major internalised homophobia to address. one of them was already in a relationship w a bi woman who’s going to leave her to marry a man (& just waiting until the day they must break up which was sad) and immediately started showing me her nudes (arab butches are the weirdest don’t even ask). the other one told me a fucked up story about how her bi ex left her to marry a man without telling her & when she got mad, her bi ex said “you’re just mad bc no man would want you with how you look”. a normal lesbian might’ve simply said “i don’t want men so idc” but the butch i met took it personally and married a man to prove a point. she got lucky bc he died within a few months of their marriage! he was trying to pressure her into sex and even complained to her family about it so if he didn’t die, who knows what trauma she would’ve faced…. also she told me she takes testosterone & steroids bc she’s a body builder and she has this kind of body smell that men often have (probs bc of the hormones) which were all big turn offs for me so. neither worked out.
my mom also still pressures me to have kids and has been since i was a baby 😭 but luckily she’s been overall supportive of me being a lesbian… hopefully your mom will be the same one day. heteronormativity is so annoying lol i hate how every gay person had to deal with our loved ones fantasising about us dating the opposite sex bc they assume we’d be OSA by default.
also no ur not making a big deal of nothing! it’s a big turn off for me having to pretend that a woman not being feminine means she’s not a woman. and it’s annoying having to pretend someone is my boyfriend or w/e else. i think it only becomes more of a turn off the longer you’re out too bc like damn too many of us already pretended to have boyfriends or to be interested in that stuff so being expected to do that to any capacity is just. bad feelings
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11/12/24
hey y'all,
how is it hanging? it's hanging well for me. as of rn.
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so many eyes in this world. so many always looking. to think of the psychology of your eyes, they are your information recruits. being a sighted person, you are constantly searching for clues and pieces in your visual field to put together this crazy puzzle we call life. mine seem to work in overdrive and all the time. i am sick of using my eyes. i'd like to take a damn break every so often, but they are always picking up every single aspect of my environment and i can't get them to stop or the bugs yell at me.
if i am comfortable in my environment, i've noticed it calms down, but that can take a while or the right people or environment. it's either the adhd or anxiety or something that makes me act up when there are a lot of people around and it makes me feel like i have to survey the room and take everything in. it's a habit that ruins my way of existing on a populated campus. i love when places aren't full and busy, when i can sit down in a coffee shop almost alone or when there's no one in the bathroom.
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i dont wanna be done with college. i feel like since i'm considering not pursuing my second major anymore, i could have one less year here :( its so funny that all through high school i couldn't wait for it to be over as well. in the process i want to be done with something, but i enjoy the routine. while school is so difficult, i love having roommates and friends right next door. it's crazy to think how much i've taken all of this for granted. i do take notice of everything and i appreciate everything, but now that i'm nearing the end of my 2.5 years here, its kinda wild to think that i only have 1.5 years left. all of a sudden i'm feeling so nostalgic, but just like they did in inside out 2, we gotta push that shit down for now. it's not time yet!!!! oy va voy.
next semester i might get a car and wont have these terribly frigid walks home anymore or complain of the bus system. that is, if i pay for campus parking. i won't have to borrow anyone's car anymore or feel nervy every time i drive because it's the first time i've driven in over a week. it would be kinda nice.
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every time something pops up up my brain, i think about it and it changes my track of focus. normal right? i forget what i was thinking about. consequently, i often forget things later on bc i lost them before even writing them down. this happens all the time and it's pretty typical for me. but what i never understand is that looming fear that i'm always forgetting something like super important. like what if i was supposed to be pursuing some hobby or mindset and i totally forgot about it. i have so many worried thoughts like this that wrack my brain. it's different than the usual "oh i forgot my headphones at home," it's more like "wait, i wanted to be more positive," "i wanted to stop cracking my knuckles," "where did that motivation go that i had an hour ago? i swear i'm into this task i'm doing aren't i?" "when did i say i wanted to finish this by? okay and then i have to really focus on something else, but i wanted to try to hyperfocus on this? no, it was the other thing...what other thing? wait, no. i thought i remembered...i can't tell if it was important or not, it sure feels important. i won't know until something big changes and i'm not ready...oh well." that kind of fear. the kind that i have no idea how to distinguish between losing something physical or leaving something behind at home.
i hate when people say to imagine yourself in a field, or hide your intrusive thoughts or thoughts you don't need to deal with in this vault, that cannot be broken, behind this painting on this wall. like, no i cannot i'm sorry. my brain knows there's no vault, no field. how will my thoughts stay in there? no they won't. i am certain that they will roam free and forget that they were supposed to "be in a box" hell i can't even remember what intrusive thoughts are until they recur constantly and affect me later on anyway, so how could i put them aside now? once they affect me they literally take control of me and i literally cannot get my brain to change its course so i just embrace it. i've had a lot of experience trying to embrace every thought that comes into my mind. i'm curious what other people think on this tbh, but for the most part i truly believe i should own every thought i have. when i have uncomfortable or intrusive thoughts, that's typically when i look up how to get rid of them and people are like, "it's normal, you don't have to acknowledge every thought that passes through your mind." and i'm like, yes. yes, i do. i wish i didn't, but when i ignore them they rise up and eat me alive. so, yeah -_-
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honestly i need to go to sleep, it's too late. i keep going to sleep at 1am and i never used to do that. the existential crises need to stop. i'm losing sleep and fucking up my times i go to sleep. i'm also fucking losing my mind every day from homework and a lack of free will. why can't i get a degree without doing any work, hmmmmmmm?? it's no fair. i want two degrees, but i barely can make enough effort for one. honestly, my whole major is questionable rn. idek why i'm doing what i'm doing. it's all unintelligible gibberish and sillyness in my brain. it's also the headaches that have really been pushing me over the edge lately. i think i'm going to go to sleep now, i'm doing it again. i've been pushing 2am recently, ugh.
goodnight, love y'all,
kD x(
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I wondered if you ever found out or wanted to find out who your fs is? personally im fine being single more so used to it than anything else. But its quite interesting to say the least... im torn between wanting to know this person but not caring bc like it not the end of the world and well the world might end one day anyway by societies own doing. I found out theyre an athlete... sadly not for the sport I prefer so I have to be a mf wag, a WAG. No, I reject this not because secretly I wouldnt like them idk them but I dont wanna be a WAG. Im not ever going to want to be a beckham. I swear im the most mf average being there is so I hope we dont end up in the same environment one day. Why did jesus have to do me dirty like this?
First school was literal hell and now adult life feels like hell continued itself then my fs is someone famous and idk how anyone normal supposed to fit into wealthy lifestyles like ehhh but idk if its worth it in the long run? relatinships and all that? my uncle cheated on his first wife three times and that deeply affected my views of romance and well it not something I genuinely longed for same with material items I rather just exist peacefully. if your fs was an actual idol or some other famous person would you sacrifice or risk it all to not have privacy and peace for them?
I’ve asked some things about my FS. They definitely seem like my type for better or for worse, and my FS is a celebrity who likes to spoil me. So all of a sudden if I’m posting all day because I have no responsibilities anymore…You know why.
Though I also agree with you on a lot of things. It’s like, something I want to know but also can’t be bothered to care 100% about. My FS is most definitely out of my league from my readings and the readings people have done for me.
Famous, attractive, intelligent, loves spoiling me, and extremely talented? Sounds like a scam, I dunno. Even if my FS clearly has many flaws. All of those flaws are in fact things I find the idea of to be questionably attractive.
But hey, in the future we can be the mildly questionable spouses of celebs together
I think if I loved them enough I’d be able to deal with it all, though. And if the fans are crazy just more of a reason to stay inside and be the recluse I already am because frankly people are insane nowadays and I’ll be damned if I get got on the street.
But yeah, I relate to you on a spiritual level. Though for me, love is more…Its interesting in other people’s lives, but in mine it’s more so…Something I can hyperfixate on and a springboard for like fantasies for me to think up of the perfect relationship n shit and not something I can see myself ever in. Not like I haven’t had multiple relationships, but those were…Interesting. Though I loved a few of my partners.
But I still get why you don’t believe in love.
We can be under qualified celeb spouses together though so at least that’s smth
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Guys i had ANOTHER australia dream
This was so crazy and soooo long
it lasted the whole night and the entirety of the dream was basically in the airport
Um.....basically our trip was planned, booked and busy. And me and the most random group, like it wasnt just friends it was high school people, it wasnt just hs people it was some family, wasnt just family it was some randos. Like the most smorgege board of squad and everyone else
And we were staying somewhere in philly, or somewhere, that was close to the airport so we could wake up and catch our flight. But then the morning of we were at the hotel and realized omg we were kinda late, so the hotel was like 25 mins from the airport and everyone wanted ample time to be there bc.....the flight was to australia like its a big deal.
So then something goes terribly wrong with me and i have to go all the way home to get something crucial, like my ticket, my passport my luggage. And im sobbing in chip at home like “i screwed it all up, i cant even go, is it even worth trying?? like would i even make it” and we looked at the time and they were supposed to board the plane at like 5:30 and idk we were over an hour away and in very hot water.
And my dad was like ehhh your in trouble but you might make it, GO FAST GO NOW.
Which is interesting because, in the last dream i was looking at the cost and it was thousands of thousands of dollars and verbatim i asked my parents “is this even worth trying to make this possible, like theres no way right? right?” expecting them to immediately say “yea theres no way” but they keep surprising me and saying basically “dont worry about that of course its possible”
Which must just be spirit telling me to stop thinking things are impossible and limiting my mindset on what can happen and what i can do.
Anyway, AuntyAbby was rushing me to the airport and i think now i was with another group who was trying to make it on time. And the whole dream is like us rushing around meeting different airport workers and befriending them saying “please please is there anyway you can help us make it to our flight on time” the airport was huge. So one person would help us take a secret underground shuttle, and one person would help us go super fast through a security checkpoint. Also plenty of elevators. They were usually to far away cause the building had too many floors and we always had to take the stairs. And it was that but for several hours. Like im not kidding, and we were begging people at each step to call the terminal and make sure they havent done the final boarding call. And everyone kept assuring us “you should make it”
But we were running. And on the way, in true dream fashion i kept having to leave little things behind that i wanted to bring but were too much of a hassell to carry around. Like stray things, and i kept fighting for my life to keep everything together but little momentos and sentimental things i kept having to leave behind.
In fact, the dream illustrated this lesson all the way through the end, because at the end of the dream when we finally are being let on the plane. We were in this waiting area for a while while the plane located seats for us because it was a packed flight to australia waiting to finally get going because of us.
I had my backpack, which my sooooo heavy and full and hurting my back to carry. My polkadot over night bag. A jacket, a purse, and my main suitcase big luggage. So you can imagine. Running around for hours trying to catch my flight, was exhausting carrying around all that baggage (in fact it was making me later *wink wink*)
So finally when we were waiting for the door to open to the plane i was first in line ready to go, SO SO SO happy to be finally securely on my flight to australia, after being so stressed out for hours. I could be excited about my mystery trip lol and relax and realize that everything worked out. I could almost taste the feeling of finally sitting in my plane seat. So much so that when they opened the door i rushed in. And the attendant told us there should be individual seats open in section C. I was walking in with erikka and i wanted a good seat, out of what was available. I found one in the row next to erikkas and it was an aisle seat. I was so excited cause it was a long flight and i didnt want to be squished by strangers.
So i run in secure my seat and realize “oh shit i have my backpack, my polkadot, and my jacket but not my LUGGAGE” so i save my seat and walk back to the door because i know i mustve left it right at the entrance. But the plane was so ready to take off that they had already locked the exits and started moving. And my stomach dropped like, i was thinking i CANNOT go to australia without my stuff what the fuck no no no no. And i told the flight attendants “please i know you have already been so patient with us and made many accommodations but i left my bag RIGHT there can you please open the door” and theyre like yikes like we started moving. There were two flight attendants helping me. The woman was convinced they could get the pilot to stop and turn around we had only gone three feet. And the man kept saying the pilot has been trying to start this trip for forever he already waited he wont turn around.
And i was SIIICCKKKKKKK
But i get it.....leave the bags, catch the elevator.
I’m just so confused as to why Australia
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Hey!! Could we please get more sugar daddy fics with a black reader ofc 😋 idk if you've done shoto already but that'd be nice or hawks and deku💕
A/N: “wrist on glitter, waist on thinner, imma show you how to bag a eight-figure nigga” 👅💋 I enjoyed this way too much
All characters are 18+
Warnings: it got a lil spicy so imma put the line
Todoroki Shouto:
this mf has money to burn
we all know todoroki came out the womb w cash from his hair to his ass
he’s on some “yes, jeff bezos knows me” type shit so if you’re tryna end up with someone that’s gonna possibly buy you a house, he’s your guy
he slid into your dms after you posted a pic with your skin moisturized and glistening under golden hour and your body had him wanting to run laps
he had been plottin on you for a min but never got the motivation to do something about it until then
he’s a no strings attached type of sugar daddy
todoroki is a big name even outside of hero work and he’s well aware of all the people that have tried to use him. so instead of letting that happen, he’s decided to do things on his own terms
when yall first started talking, he questioned you like this was managerial position at apple 💀
best believe he ran an in-depth background check and made you sign an NDA 💀💀💀
he was a tough one
but you passed w flying colors and y’all settled on an arrangement
you have a weekly allowance that hits your bank account every saturday with some bonuses that he’ll give you depending on how the week goes
todoroki isnt needy nor is he one to be all up in your business
it’s actually weird in an endearing kind of way?
he only wants to have conversations with you
i mean, dont get me wrong, he’s up for anything you are
todoroki would be a liar if he said he never ended some nights with a picture of you and a hand down his pants
but that’s not what he’s mainly looking for
you figure out very quickly that shouto just wants someone to talk to
he’ll randomly hit up your phone and have a 30 min convo about something like the weather or hero politics, and then he’ll dip
next thing you know, you got $1000 in your cashapp
you kind of panicked bc like...wtf?
your dumb ass messaged him: “did you mean to send $1000?”
sis, dont put a question mark where God put a period
him: “Yes.”
and that was the end of that
you dont question anymore
he’s not doting in any kind of way, and sometimes you lowkey think he forgets about you, but you still get your allowance
doesn’t send a lot of gifts unless you explicitly state you want something
he doesnt text back a lot, but he tried to respond when he can
but i do see him liking it when you send him mundane things you do throughout your day, like pics of cookies you baked, or a cool plant you saw at home depot
and he enjoys the times you and him end up just trashing his father for nearly an hour. expect to find flowers, with some expensive ass coats or something at your door the next morning
he really fucks w your laid back vibe
sometimes he forgets you guys arent really supposed to be friends
Takami Kiego (Hawks):
this is not hawks’ first time being a sugar daddy
he’s hot, rich, and one of the most eligible bachelor’s in japan with a life that prevents him from having anything too serious
so, long story short, he’s a veteran at this
he used to be the type to reach out to instagram baddies but he had a couple bad run-ins and decided to stick with the official sites because it was a lot more secure on both ends
the funny thing was, you set up your account a long time ago as a joke. though at one point, you did take it seriously, but you came in contact with a lot of super creepy men that sexualized you for your skin and ethnicity.
you were tired of the “chocolate king/queen” and “amazonian god/dess” comments,so you took a break. you didnt have much activity since
so imagine youre surprise when the #2 hero hit your line talking about some
“Hey~ I’ll get straight to the point. I think you’re beautiful and I’d like to talk with you about an arrangement”
you thought this was a fake account, but after he chatting for a little and sending some pictures, you knew he was the real deal
hawks is your standard tit-for-tat transaction sugar daddy
he’s the type to hit you up at night with a “how ya doing, dove? got any pics for me?”
he’s good about his respect ad won’t do anything out of line
it’s the bare minimum, be he doesnt fetishize you so that’s always nice
however, he does make you call him daddy, sir, etc. whether it’s through text, call, or when y’all get together for...reasons
ngl his dicc game is fire
he might ghost you for a week or so but he’ll always come back with a nice check to make up for it
just be careful about catching feelings bc he’s so fucking smooth. he makes you feel like you’ve got his heart, but dont fall for that shit
if you think you can “change him” or fuflfil whatever wattpad romance fantasy lives in your head, he is not your guy. you better get on w your life before you get your heart broken
he’s here to suck, fuck, send pics, do a little phone call here n there, send some money, and go
if you’re not with all that, you might as well dip
but if you’re cool with that, rest assured, you’re gonna be living your best mf life with this man in your wallet
and good news, you might not be his only, but you are his favorite
there’s just something about you that’s got him giving you a few extra thousand than he normally does
he doesnt take his sugar babies on proper dates bc he’s gotta stay away from media outlets, but he will invite you to his office for a “lunch break”
if you ever surprise him with a cute but sexy hawks cosplay, you won’t have to work for two whole weeks bc you cant walk
overall, he’s a good sugar daddy. defintely good for your pockets and any other non-romantic desires you want fulfilled
Mirodirya Izuku:
the way you two met and came to this arrangement was more or less an accident
the life of the number one pro-hero was lonely and stressful
he’s tried to dip his toes in the water here and there, but it never worked out because not many people could deal with the fact that he’d always put hero work first
he was teetering on the edge of signing up for one of those sugar daddy/baby websites until he met you at some cafe he passed by
it’s cliche really. you were his server and, honestly? he was hooked on day one
he watched you intently as you pranced around in your cute uniform. he couldnt stop admiring your brown skin and eyes and how cute your hair was. you spoke with such enthusiasm and cheerfulness that he couldnt help but swoon. and it didn’t hurt that you were very easy on the eyes
he listened to you as you went on a spiel about how college was a fortune and how you stayed up last night for a project bc you had to pick up extra shifts
that’s when he made his decision
by the time the hero is out of the door, you collected the reciept and almost fainted when you realized he left you a $500 tip and his personal number
“i enjoyed talking to you today and i hope we can continue that...here’s something small to help with your bills. and i hope this isnt too forward but you’re very beautiful. stay safe. deku.”
and what did you do that night?
you called his ass right back
you were nervous as hell bc you still couldnt believe this was real, but after talking on the phone with him for two hours, an arrangement was set
midoriya is the most gentlemen like sugar daddy out there
you wake up to good morning texts and a few hundred in your bank account almost every two days
he goes crazy over your insta posts. and if you wear something green? expect a bonus
takes you out shopping unprovoked
izuku: “are you busy? i saw you were having a rough week and was wondering if you wanted to go to that new outlet mall downtown”
you: 🏃🏾♀️💨
you most certainly had homework due that night but what tf you look like missing out on that offer?
it’s after so many “dates” that deku realizes that he prefers hanging around you more than he should but he doesnt wanna ruin anything so he keeps that underwraps
he’s the idiot that goes into this thinking he won’t fall in love
deku defintely has some dirty thoughts about you but he doesnt try to bring it up unless you do first
if you’re comfortable with anything nsfw, you gone see a whole different side to izuku
he’s a giver, giver, giver, but when he recieves, he just about loses it
send him “innocent” pics of yourself matched with a string of filthy texts and he’ll combust
when you send him pics of yourself in deku-themed lingre, he deadass sends you a whole black card with your name on it as a thank you
you guys get very comfortable with each other very quickly
soon enough, DA’s start turning into y/n stayng over for a week
you both realize this relatiosnhip runs a lot deeper than an arrangement when he accidentally let it slip that he told his mom about you
he’s profusely apologizing but you shut him up with a kiss and tell him that you’ve kinda caught feelings yourself
your next conversation works out well for the both of you
#bnha headcanons#mha headcanons#deku x reader#izuku x black!reader#hawks x black!reader#hawks x reader#todoroki shouto x reader#shouto x black!reader#takami keigo#todoroki shouto#midoriya izuku#bnha x poc!reader#bnha x black reader#mha x poc!reader#mha x reader#mha x black reader#bnha x reader
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finally finished writing about how much stormbringer enhances the skk dynamic which was at a nascent stage in Fifteen and anticipates the developments which happen later and culminate in Dead Apple where the faith they have in each other is absolutely remarkable! the fact that i said i’d do this in a few hours yesterday but it took me like 24 hrs to finish i have an attention span of a whole 2 minutes 💀
my favorite thing about stormbringer is that it actually builds up on the concepts/themes introduced in Fifteen so it's a glimpse into what has changed in dazai and dazai & dhuuya after one year of being together. As much as it's about chuuya confronting his past and his identity this is also about dazai’s development from who he was in fifteen. chuuya and rimbaud both left their marks on dazai and in Stormbringer we see him, actually trying to emulate or follow in a sense a way of life, that chuuya and rimbaud represented. Stormbringer is not just about chuuya, abt his test of humanity, or he coming in terms with who or what he is. it's about dazai too. it's about dazai developing or at least attempting to develop what he calls “boyish”/ “ordinary” in Fifteen. its not about chuya having an identity crisis. in fact what we understand from Code 04's last section is that chuuya never considered it as his crisis and neither did dazai. so to dazai “saving chuuya is important, human or not doesn't matter” and when dazai gives chuuya time to think abt what the operation will cost him chuuya doesnt so much as flinch form his purpose. This goes on to show unlike verlaine he doesnt care about memory and certainly doesnt consider it as the only determinant of someone being human. He cares more abt yokohama and his friends and in that, in caring abt his “family”, he is just as human as the next person. whether he’s factually human or not comes secondary to his desire to save people. This is a message that the quality of being human has more to do with embodying human qualities or humanity than having memories and lineage. so yeah stormbringer is essentially about embracing humanity but this happens on 2 levels: both chuuya and dazai embrace humanity. Going back to the boyish or ordinary bit, im talking abt this segment:
here dazai is shocked because he assumed everyone “gangsta” and everyone crazy powerful delighted in homicide, in deliberately indulging in the macabre. but he is proved wrong. He logically concluded that anyone with power more than average and belonging to the underground would kill people and delight in that because it’s a given they lack any kind of moral understanding. To that end, they’d be exalted at the prospect of relentlessly shooting a dead body, mutilating it and dishonoring it. The mafia code (any general mafia code) works in a way where honor and death goes hand in hand. So only the lowest of the low would do that to a dying person, who even when faced with certain death is loyal to his own organisation. This really shows that even within the mafia dazai is the only person whos like the devil incarnate. So yeah dazai at this sate far lower than even a mafia member. But chuuya who actually embodiess the mafia code and is incredibly loyal to his organisation and “family” [ putting family in quotes bc he himself calls his friends family 🥺] ofc kicks the gun away. From dazai’s pov chuuya being as insanely powerful as he is should also do the same. But chuuya comes along and suggests that even enemies should be shown respect where it’s due. And that is what an ordinary person, oblivious to mafia life (mafia life as in waht dazai makes of it) thinks. So in undermining the binary between “ordinary” and “mafia” chuuya proves that being mafia doesnt necessarily mean selling your soul to the devil and giving up the last smidge of humanity. In fact by embodying qualities like compassion and kindness and mutual respect, you can make the mafia a better place for yourself and for the other members. Now in Stormbringer, we see how this affected dazai. here dazai is introduced as someone mercilessly killing to set up the channel.
Now to expand the channel one would need to keep doing it right? To mercilessly kill ppl and stuff but instead what he does is hand the channel over to chuuya bc he knows chuuya wouldnt handle it like him. im not suggesting that dazai miraculously becomes v good or anything with dazai the key words is “try” or “to some extent” like in Fifteen when Chuuya asks “do u wanna live” he’s like “ not to that extent”. similarly its not to say he doesnt kill people anymore. it is that he tries to lessen the number of casualties by handing over one of the most troublesome channels to chuuya who would manage it in a much more humane way. That dazai draws from his friends/at least tries to is smth we’ll see again later on when he deals with akutagawa. He talks about odasaku and ofc its baffling to him that a mafia member as powerful as him would be taking acre of orphans. and dazai says but he cant afford to be that kind and proceeds to shoot akutagswa but again does so in a calculated way such that he doesnt end up killing him ( im NOT justifying dazai’s abuse not at all im just saying that its hard to believe he coincidentally knew the exact no of bullets that aku could block. and had odasaku’s words and his way of life not been in the back of his mind he could’ve ended up killing aku) coming back to chuuya and dazai we also see him avoiding further conversation on the jewelry channel thing as he says “leave that for now”. He does a similar thing again when mori brings up the concept of double suiciding with chuuya.
Its a HUGE thing for him to digest that him suiciding would inevitably spell the doom for chuuya. this puts an unimaginable responsibility on him. And he avoids further discussion on this. Now we know dazai is the rambly type. Even in the most dire moments he goe son with his LOONG monologues so really he is the last person who’d avoid a conversation but he deliberately does it in these 2 instances because its hard for him to grasp these things. That he can go against his nature and do a conscientious thing by handing over one of the most grisly channels to chuuya (i dont think dazai’s nature is evil. Or even if it is, its a a social construct keeping in mind the war ravaged times or its mori’s construct because he does exploit dazai to the hilt. but dazai ofc thinks of himself as non-human, devious. perfectly devilish...etc.) And also the fact that someone as suicidal as him is actually responsible for the life of someone else is really too much to take in. a whole 10 seconds pause indicates just how much he was thrown off when mori opened his eyes to the reality of things: if he dies, chuuya inexorably dies as a consequence. also i dont think the “wow” here or the next bit :
is something jokey. if it was like haha double suicide with chuuya is the worst haha wanna do it w pretty lady kind of a deal. that pause would have been unnecessary. dazai’s immediate reaction would’ve been whining and shit. the use of “froze” too implies the gravity of the situation. so ofc what is “wow” is how much meaning his life has for someone else. and for some so much....better than him. and what is unacceptable is this sad, sad truth that his life (to which he ascribes no value) would be so inextricably linked with someone else’s and hold so much meaning to them. it is like when a suicidal person at the brink of suicide understanding his life is not his own. his life and death holds consequences for ppl surrounding him. so both of these are huge things to grasp and at both these times dazai is visibly shaken up so much so that he doesnt want to do his favorite thing- ramble in a condescending tone. smth he does in so many instances. this really is a testimony to the fact that things are changing in him. the redemption process has begun. he’s no longer the kind of maniac he was before he encountered chuuya. when zuko underwent his transition in atla he was so shaken up after one (1) right decision he had a fever. i think this is true for anyone who’s trying to change. change is after all a huge thing for everyone. ofc he’ll be unsettled. so anyways this is proof that he has indeed come a long way from being someone who revelled at the prospect of meaningless bloodshed.
now coming to the concept of love he assumes he’d get sick of love and die:
and that death is the singular goal worth chasing after because it makes you feel more alive/get a fuller picture of what living entails. but here he is erring by supposing love is something that’ll bore him/have no meaning. and it cant provide him that “something” he’s looking for. at this point he hasn’t loved so he doesnt know whether he’ll be sick of it or if it'll have no impact. And yet he’s morose and regretful. this is a kind of self-imposed constraint hes putting on himself. he cancels out the v idea of love because hes convinced it isnt worth it. he hasnt even been in love okay scratch being in love that sounds romantic and i really dont mean love in a romantic sense here...its just love. in general. any form is cool. anyway so dazai is not familiar with any kind of love. He is entirely alien to the concept. he doesnt even know what a friend/partner is so he doesnt know what love is. this is cleared out here when rimbaud confesses he did everything for paul and dazai is unconvinced:
chuuya ofc admonishes him and shuts him up for good, he says dazai has no right lookind down upon smth he doesnt understand. he doesnt understand friendship, love. or loyalty. or how important those feelings are at this point. now this situation is turned on its head in stormbringer. but before we go into that let’s look at the message rimbaud had for both of them. ik he specifically asks for chuuya to “live” but there’s purpose behind including both of them in the frame. it’s a message they should both take to heart. and at the end of it its implied both are changed after hearing it:
and in this message the first bit is for chuuya. what he says is basically memory doesn’t make u human... ”you are you” just a frame or not doesnt matter. and even if hes just a frame, he is still beautiful. beauty actually is a v important concept in literature starting right from Plato to Shakespeare. i’d not bring this here but because bsd is so deeply rooted in literature i feel like the reference to beauty, and later on to soul and even warmth and also the universal tone of this message carries some meaning. so the thing is both Plato and Shakespeare were endorsed the idea of love as a force awakened in the world by beauty which then leads the soul to perfection. so humans and by extension, all life are beautiful frames that can inspire love. this concept is also there in Romantic poetry like Keats and Wordsworth all of them talked about loving beauty in nature and how that can elevate the body mind and soul. so essentially in telling this to chuuya what ehe basically means is that chuuya just by being him, by being a beautiful framework can inspire love and warmth in others and thats a great purpose! how much chuuya understands of this purpose with his one (1) braincell and his low self esteem is questionable but he gets some sense of belonging. now this is a two way relationship so ofc dazai has to be factored in. he comes in the next part:
these are from 2 different translation so the disparity im sorry ;-; but anyway, this last part abt the world being a cold place. then paul. then “warmth” is a message to dazai who’s been introduced to us as cold-hearted and having like no bearings of a human being. this is the reason why its important for both o f them to be there. now going back to chuuya being a beautiful framework, the framework can be beautiful in so far as its beauty is appreciate by someone and inspires warmth and love in someone. this again is the whole beauty/beholder nature/the romantic concept that is there in shakespeare and in Romantic poetry where both are a part of a codependent relationship. so what rimbaud implies here is that dazai can have that kind of a relationship with another person (chuuya) just like rimbaud had with paul which makes him warm and the world doesnt feel cold anymore. rimbaud has no regrets about what he did because. so the idea is that dazai and chuuya can share the same dynamic. also after this, the narrative says that their hearts are now changed and wont return to what they were before....and even their souls are refined in a way. but in Fifteen we dont have a concrete proof of how this happened bc the novel ends at this point. Instead, Stormbringer shows exactly how deep the impact of those words is:
this is the third instance of dazai showing hesitation and once again this has to do with chuuya. the seed of the dynamic that rimbaud was talking about is already germinating in him. his reactions, his fidgeting, his hesitancy, in response to chuuya’s situation is such a big contrast to his cocksure self when he’s conversing with adam and verlaine. after this of course we have:
not only does he clearly express his concern but he gives chuuya 2 whole mins to make a decision and based on that he’s prepared to overturn the operation. the success rate of an alternative plan will ofc be lesser than the og one but that doesnt faze dazai. he’s ready to turn the tide for chuuya’s sake and if this is not development idk what is. just a year ago, he was someone to whom the concept of rimbaud going thru all that trouble for his friend was a lost concept. ironically enough, now he finds himself doing something that is along the same lines. he puts chuuya above his mission. to him, chuuya is more important than getting a satisfactory result. another bit that i wanna talk abt is that one controversial section where dazai says he’ll save chuuya, human or not, and then the justification is:
i think a lot of people got mad bc of this and honestly at first glance i was peeved too. as a chuuya stan some of the shit dazai has done so far did rub me the wrong way. i love skk obv but still those were moments that kind of left a bad taste in the mouth. i’ll discuss them later on bc stormbringer helps allay that feeling. coming back to the “i wanna see chuuya suffer” part firstly context is important. ofc someone like dazai cant be expected to be upfront about his feelings with ppl (or AI) he barely knows. so what be relays to adam, is only partly true and its actually a kind of a twist in concept. the things is, and this is smth dazai knows all too well is that ppl suffer simply on account of being human. human suffering is brought on because humans, by virtue of being humans, feel. so when he says he’s willing to acknowledge chuuya as human despite what N and Verlaine said he’s already admitting that chuuya suffers. so there is really nothing “new” to see for him. he knows chuuya suffers already and he does too because they’re both humans trying to make it thru their messed up lives. also chuuya “ceasing to be human” is a p huge concern for him bc he himself is like that. just like with the suicide thing, it bothers dazai when someone else shares his situation/his fate like as long as his life is his own, he has no problem ending it whenever but the situation is complicated when someone else’s life span is determined by that decision. and similarly, as long as he is “no longer human” its not that much of an issue because he’s like resigned to a doomed fate but someone like chuuya ceasing to be human or worse yet never getting to know if hes human or not are pressing matters. so anyways what he actually means here is that in saving chuuya, he saves someone who suffers just like he does and in their case, even the cause of suffering boils down to a shared psychological conflict: what essentially constitutes being human and if im human or not. now this sharing of pain and suffering is the foundation of forming a connection with someone, which makes life a little better. here again, what rimaud imparted to dazai and chuuya is driven home. also dazai’s key anxiety is not finding meaning/anything. this “anything” can be assumed to be something that justifies life. so all his anxiety and frustration stems from the fact that there really is no discernible meaning to be found in the mechanism of life. so it is an empty pursuit because it is true that nothing can explain why feelings of pain and suffering are exponentially heavier than feelings of happiness or why after getting to experience one (1) free day we’re back to square one where life is grueling. these are questions that really dont have an answer so every time dazai like gazes into the abyss and says he didnt find anything, he is not so much asking if he’ll ever find anything as swallowing the hard truth that there is nothing to be found, no singular entity exists that can magically justify everything. again drawing upon literature or philosophy more specifically, there’s a concept called Absurdism which says the only philosophical truth so to say is this that life is absurd and looking for meaning is futile. instead what we can do is accept that it is absurd and deal with it in the best way possible, by finding little sources and moments of happiness, and strewing them together so we feel somewhat content. even if it is just for a fleeting second. and this happiness/contentment amidst a wretched life (altho temporal) can be found in friendship, in sharing, and even in having fun with people you’re comfortable with! this is actually why dazai wants to save chuuya and now it may seem like im interpreting his words through the shipping lens but thats not so and it can be corroborated by looking into dazai’s words to odasaku. after chuuya, dazai’s next attempt at friendship was odasaku who he found “interesting”. now when odasaku sort of like threw hands and chose death over having to live a life without the orphans, dazai tried to stop him not by saying stuff like life is good. and things will def change for the better. but instead he admits that living is hard and the sense of void is ubiquitous and yet he doesnt want him to up and die because then he would be sad. because the little comfort that he got from odasaku and something he probably assumed odasaku also got from him would be gone. [how much odasaku considered dazai a source of comfort remains unclear. in fact the reason odasaku gave up and died was because he did not have this. this feeling of sharing in someone else’s suffering and seeking comfort in friends in the real world. instead he was too vested in his ideal world. his over reliance on an entirely idealistic concept is actually what pushed him over the edge. and this would have been the case for dazai too had he not encountered and sought comfort and companionship in chuuya and eventually in odasaku ] so this again goes on to show how rimbaud’s words changed dazai’s heart. and in a way dazai really has been doing this unconsciously form the v beginning like by teasing chuuya continually in Fifteen. you dont expect someone as cold as him to indulge in friendly bickering and taunting so often but he does. that there is significance and even happiness in that is something he learns over time, after rimbaud’s words to him. although these things seem futile on the surface they give a moment’s respite. so although chuuya spinning dazai on a rope in stormbringer might seem weird to everyone, they still serve a purpose:
what shirase puts forward is particularly relevant here because neither dazai nor chuuya is fully aware of the extent of their feelings (or even what those feelings are like they dont know what label to put. so typical oblivious lovers) for each other or what they stand to gain just by driving each other nuts but there is something intangible but satisfying to be felt. a kind of contentment that helps him continue. one day at a time. there is no one great “thing” that can make him like wake up one day feeling like he doesnt want to die ever again. but again like i said before, the key word for dazai is “extent” so, these little things to some extent contribute to a sense of fulfilment which helps him keep death at bay. thats why he’s bent on saving chuuya bc he knows they can share in their suffering and make life better for each other. its not like he wants chuuya to suffer. chuuya will suffer nonetheless like every other human. but in suffering together there is something to be found so he doesnt want him to cease being human.
this covers more or less the intertextuality between Stormbringer and Fifteen. i just wanna talk a bit more about a couple other moments in Stormbringer that i feel are p important because they put some things in the series in perspective and also made the dead apple moment 10x more emotional 🥺 one thing that really strikes me is the absolute fanon level of comfort that dazai and chuuya share in Strombringer. its like scenes form k-drama lol.
so yeah this stuff. compare this with dazai’s reaction @atsushi when he drops im not saying that its not just a joke and that what im saying should be the right way to look at this contrast. its not like that at all. but what this does is give an estimate to the readers just how close and comfortable dazai feels when its chuuya. and this plus everything i rambling on abt for so long also gives us an estimate about the sincerity of dazais feelings. now 2 things always bothered me : the fact that dazai actually left chuuya and the fact that after the fight against lovecraft he actualy deserted him (this again can ofc be construed as just a humorous bit but still it did leave a bad taste in my mouth) dazai leaving the mafia is ofc something he had to do to fulfil oda’s dying wish but it still dint sit right with me that he would abandon chuuya. just like oda levaing is harder on dazai, dazai leaving is harder on chuuya. its always harder on the one left behind. so anyway, these sorts of things sometimes made me doubt dazai’s feelings but now that stormbringer clears it all up i do think there is a larger motif at work here. when mori offers dazai to come back to the mafia in s2 we see him saying that it was mori who kicked him out and that he did so because he was afraid dazai would usurp his position. so he set it up in a way that dazai would be forced to leave but on his own accord. now more than usurpation i believe what mori really did fear is that dazai had no allegiance to the mafia (which is actually true) bc he doesnt have that sense of loyalty and that to him his friends were more important than swearing allegiance to mori. (which again is true). so by getting oda killed, the message that mori seemed to be giving out was if dazai didnt leave he would do it again. and if we consider ango’s betrayal which had already transpired at that point, the one mori would next target to sort of get at dazai would inevitably be chuuya. this is only conjecture but still, i do believe this might as well be true because then it would explain why dazai didnt carry chuuya back to the base after their fight [something he was v comfortable doing in Stormbringer. in fact in the first case he carries chuuya back to the billiards bar and not to the mafia’s base so he could hear albatross’ last words 🥺] its because mori needs to know unlike dazai, chuuya is absolutely loyal to him which regrettably he is. it kinda becomes imperative therefore on part of dazai to make it seem that way to mori. that they really are at each others throats and that dazai is insignificant to chuuya. and that the mafia comes before dazai. (which is not true bc we see chuuya protecting his friend [shirase] while also staying loyal to the mafia in Stormbringer)
mori also in his own way tries to provoke hostility b/w them like in Dead Dpple when he was all like yeah so dazai is the star and chuuya is merely bait. so it kinda makes sense if dazai left the mafia not only to like do good work but also to protect chuuya from mori. also the fact that chuuya did the same thing— left the Sheep and joined PM to protect Shirase from the mafia makes be believe that my speculation is plausible given all the parallels we find between dazai and chuuya.
and the last bit is about the brilliant Dead Apple scene and how much added context it gets in light of Stormbringer.
in this scene dazai first says: “you used Corruption believing in me?” and then the translation is “how beautiful” which is an okay translation but the exact thing dazai said was “nakasetekurerune” which literally is : youre gonna make me cry you know? now my knowledge of japanese is like duolingo level but i do know “nakasete” has to do with crying and “kureru” is used by the receiver to indicate he’s receiving a feeling/object from someone close. so basically chuuya trusting him is something so beautiful that it could almost move him to tears. now lets look at dazai’s intro in Stormbringer:
dazai, being dazai, ofc would be able to tell genuine trust from fealty out of fear so ofc the fact that chuuya has this kind of blind faith in him is overwhelming for him. also stormbringer really expands on the sight effects of Corruption in full detail. its so PAINFUL and to think that chuuya would jump into it right away for dazai’s sake.....no wonder he is so soft when deactivating him. and then he proceeds to flirt for a little bit with the Snow White and the kiss of life reference. but this flirting doesnt seem even a little out of place now. it doesn't feel like smth meaningless or smth that dazai is just saying as a joke. that there is absoluetly no subtext to making a statement like that. instead that kind of flirting feels like smth inspired from a deep, deep familiarity with someone who really shares his heart and soul. when he talks to chuuya abt the problem of not knowing whether he is human or not, it is a problem that is as central to him as it’s to chuuya. not feeling fully reconciled to a human identity is a problem thats fundamental to both of them. I don’t think familiarity gets any deeper than this where you share the exact same psychological problem. so its really wonderful how we can trace the skk development now: what starts out as a crush on part of dazai or not a crush exactly rather, a feeling of perplexed admiration because chuuya is breathtakingly beautiful inside out, eventually gain all these layers and develops into something meaningful where they have so much faith in each other and where they literally help each other live. knowing someone out there shares your exact issue so you’re really not alone in this is perhaps the greatest comfort in the world. also now its clear how both of them would have turned out had they not met each other and had they not taken in rimbaud’s advice. chuuya in his desire to learn about himself and frustration at not being able to do the same would have perhaps spiralled downward and ended up becoming like verlaine. he is his double here after all. and had dazai not seen chuuya up close being the wonderful person he is, he too would have probably ended up developing a god complex and becoming like fyodor. dazai is there to save chuuya literally from dying a monster and chuuya is there to remind him he too can try and mend his ways and embrace his human side. after all chuuya has so much trust him in! (despite him having questionable methods) for both of them, it starts out as an attempt to be more human, then establishing a fruitful partnership, and finally coming in terms with their feelings to some extent. for dazai, he’s comfortable enough to engage in occasional flirting at this point and for chuuya it’s playing along with dazai’s antics (well with the ones he get 💀 pretty boy has half a functional braincell) and openly showing his concern for him. so really by confirming their feelings what strombringer does is enhance the skk development in a way that Dead Apple doesnt seem like fan service anymore. the fact that dazai would casually flirt or be comfortable with chuuya landing on his crotch 💀 all that isnt as ridiculous as it first seemed because stormbringer lays the groundwork and anticipates all the intimate/flirty skk moments that have happened till now and ig will happen again soon.
#bsd#stormbringer#soukoku#dazai osamu#chuuya nakahara#bungou stray dogs#stormbringer spoilers#bsd meta#bsd analysis
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Manager!Seijoh Part 8
a/n: okay so since my halloween special was a flop ill write this instead but uwuwuwuwu its also my birthday today so hehe this is kinda a special request too :D
WAIT YOU GUYS THIS IS TOTALLY IRRELEVANT IF YOURE NOT A POTTERHEAD BUT OMG I SHARE THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS SIRIUS BLACK LIKE WHAT :”) I THINK I SAVED A COUNTRY IN MY PAST LIFE OR SOMETHING :”)
for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!
anon:
- IF IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY! omg :0 i think we can all agree that the ramen shop will get GOOD BUSINESS that day. but it was a total surprise when the upperclassmen basically JUMP you after exiting your last class. vball practice? deliberately cancelled cuz today is YOUR day. kyo leading you, iwa making sure your eyes are closed while oikawa keeps teasing you on how you’re letting a group of men take you BLIND (cue the PUNCH). your smile is worth the XXX amount spent c,:
LOOK HOW CUTE MATTSUHANA ARE IN THIS LIKE OMG ITS LIKE IWAOI SPIRIT SWITCHED W THEIRS AND NOW IWAOI HAVE TO PULL THEM APART INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND
okay yay happy birthday to me uwu
i kinda put this request off since my borfday was right around the corner so hahaha to the anon who requested this, here it is!!!
okay anyways!!!
so today is your borfday
obvs this could be any day lmao it doesnt have to be today but it can be any day just pretend the calendar was different lmao
you were born today and your parents and natsu obvs celebrated it the morning you woke up
like you were peacefully holding your squirtle plushie and snuggling close to get more sleep bc it was still early
but natsu quite literally kicked your door down and your parents walked in with a large cake with candles
STEPBRO WHAT ARE YOU-
okay ill stop now
ofc you were startled bc what the hek
like you were so surprised that you rolled off the bed and landed harshly on the floor
instead of being yanno ‘yey! its my borfday!’ you were like ‘dear asahi kill me’
waking you up at the buttcrack of dawn?
lmao 10/10 not recommend
natsu felt really bad and he pulled you up from the floor and situated you back on the bed while your parents backtracked back downstairs
‘ohmygosh babygirl im so sorry i didnt mean to hulk smash you to the floor’
im sorry sir what 💀
this whore
you waved him off but he still felt guilty so he just pressed kisses to your forehead to soothe it
meanwhile youre just leaning against him, eyes closed, bc you grew up with natsu always doing this whenever you got hurt so it was such a soff moment for you
eventually, he was able to bring you downstairs and your parents were lowkey scared lmao but you smiled at them
‘thank you for the cake’
they breathed a sigh of relief and you sat down on the chair to eat breakfast
‘here darling’
you accepted the bowl of rice from your madre and you ate your birthday breakfast with them while yall are saving the cake for later during dinner
when you finished, you were getting up and shouting up the stairs that you were showering first
hehe natsu was all like ‘lmao why? its like 4 in the morning’
you froze, foot hovering over a step and you sighed
‘excuse me what 💀‘
yea no
you were dragged back to the kitchen and you were all pouty bc duh who the hek wants to wake up that early but your parents saved themselves by giving you your parents early
(literally anything you guys want they gave you okay? but only like 3 lmao not a bajillion things)
you were still grateful for everything and you felt very much appreciated
since it was still early, you just decided to screw it and got ready to go to school early and set up the gym for early morning practice
natsu volunteered to go with you to school but you shook your head
‘nah, im okay. the walk is peaceful’
he huffed, crossing his arms, but nodded anyways
‘fine. only because its your birthday’
hehehehe the amount of freedom during your day of birth
you were of course the first one in the gym but you didnt mind bc you actually liked the quietness that was so rare inside there
you turned on some (f/m) (lmao favorite/music) and you were sweeping, unknowingly swaying and dancing slightly
at around 5:40, the third years have arrived and since theyre the eldest, they usually get there first
omg the blush explosion on their faces when they saw you twirling around with the mop and ofc oikawa being the little poopie head he is, he swooped in and held your waist
you got startled but seeing the soft brown eyes of your captain made a soft smile appear on your face
‘hello, oikawa-san’
you whispered and he nuzzled his face to the side of your head softly
‘morning, y/n-chan’
before he could go on, iwa threw him away behind him and you giggled
mattsun raised an eyebrow at your odd behavior
‘hm? why are you so happy today, y/n-chan?’
you stopped then chuckled
‘nothing much, mattsun-san’
you didnt really want to tell them it was your birthday bc tbh you didnt think it was a big deal or anything
the others werent complaining bc they rarely see you so lively and upbeat and they loved it
you were humming under your breath for gods sake
the other boys have trickled in and again, they also went ‘?’
your soft smiles, giggles, and joy was everything to them
god bless for this beautiful morning
poor kindaichi cowered in fright as he braced himself for a scolding from you for missing a block but he got even more scared when you just patted his head
‘its okay, yuu-kun. there’s always a next time’
yea there was something wrong
unfortunately, school was starting and they weren’t able to start questioning you and there aint no way kindaichi and kunimi were going to do that themselves without the upperclassmen who could calm you down if you got too defensive
you were skipping down the hallway and you even looped your arms around your first year friends and they shared a confused look before being dragged by you
during class, darling kunimi was too busy and distracted by your quiet singing of some show that takeru watched when you were over
‘KUNIMI-SAN, IS MATH SO BORING THAT YOU FIND INTEREST ON L/N-SAN INSTEAD?’
yes, yes it is
but he didnt say that and instead turned away so fast that you felt the wind beside you
DID A 180 CRAZY~~~
he texted the separate bros group chat about you still being all happy and they were all curious as to what makes you so happy
during lunch time, kindaichi usually went over to go eat with you and kunimi right?
but he was surprised when he just saw kunimi there without you
‘wh-’
‘i dont know’
‘what do you mean you dont know?!’
nah fam we not dying yet
natsu texted you earlier that he had a bento for you that he made himself and he wanted you to eat it instead of the one your mom made
you were passing by the building entrance door thingy and caught the attention of the third years who were at the rooftop eating their lunch
there was also other students outside and they watched your flowery aura skip over to the equally attractive hiroshi natsu
‘y/n-chan~’
he cooed and you smiled up at him
curse him and his tall height
he let you hold the f/c cloth covered box so he could cup your face and kiss over your booboo again
‘wo mow, matsu-’
translation: no more, natsu!
you whined as he kept kissing your forehead and you were turning red at the attention from the other students
dang oikawa crushed his juice box at the sight even though he knew natsu was just a cousin
‘ill save you, y/n-chan!’
he shouted, already flying down the stairs towards you and the other third years after him to keep him from doing something stupid
but they also lowkey wanna see you too
but by the time they reached the entrance, you were already walking away and even passed by the quartet, giving them a close-eyed smile and a cute ‘hello!’
the 3 were distracted by you and were coddling you while oikawa ran out and shouted after natsu’s retreating form
‘natsu! oi, natsu!’
as if the boy was purposely ignoring him, natsu kept walking forward
‘HIROSHI NATSU!’
his scream finally made him turn around and natsu’s face held a teasing smirk
‘oya? chibi-chan?’
KDJFSLFDFKDSJKFD YES YOU CALLED?
oikawa huffed and panted as he firmly walked over to natsu
‘tell me, hiroshi natsu. why is y/n-chan all cutesy and happy today?’
then the smirk fell, replaced by an actual, genuine annoyed look
‘hah?’
oikawa blinked
‘what do you mean ‘hah’?’
natsu waved his hands around in a frenzy of shock
‘so you mean to tell me, you, oikawa tooru, the dude who literally woke up the neighborhood at the buttcrack of dawn a few weeks ago, in love with my cousin, doesn’t know what today is?’
‘was i supposed to,,,, know?’
KSDLFJSDKFJDS THIS DUDE
natsu’s face became a meme and the guy was so disappointed that he just turned around and continued walking
oikawa gasped and clutched natsu’s arm, begging and pleading to tell him
ofc the little shite natsu is, he smirked down at oikawa’s kneeling form
‘hmm, gotta say, chibi-kun. i like this view~’
KDSLFJSDKFJLSDKFJDKS WHOS CHILD ARE YOU, HIROSHI NATSU
‘tell me, natsu-chan!’
the puppy eyes of oikawa tooru not only affected girls but also boys fully socked homosexual boys so natsu had to turn away, fighting down a blush
stay loyal to katsuki
stay loyal to katsuki
stay loyal to katsuki
wait, no, probably tetsu
or kenma
or both
or keiji
‘-me! natsu-chan!’
that snapped the pink-haired boy out of his thoughts and crossed his arms, glaring down at oikawa
‘hm, why do you wanna know so bad? youre on your knees, begging me for information you shouldve already known since you claim to like her so much’
oikawa pouted and he sniffled
‘i wanna know everything about y/n-chan. i wanna know what today is so i can make her as happy as she is today forever!’
‘youre so cheesy’
natsu chided and oikawa pouted even harder causing natsu to sigh and pinch his nose
‘the girl was born today’
oikawa’s face lit up and he hurriedly stood on his feet, hands on natsu’s biceps since he could barely reach natsu’s shoulders bc of his 6′5 height
‘its her birthday today?!’
‘i literally just said that-’
‘oh my gosh! we need to plan something!’
oikawa started but then frowned
‘but we’re in school so it would be too late to do a surprise when we finish’
his mumbles
filled their vicinity and natsu finally realized where exactly they were so he tugged the still mumbling boy over to the side out of people’s view
ohmygosh if i saw 2 handsome, tall, hot boys there, id be staring too omg
‘oi, oikawa’
he still didnt budge until natsu had to kick him at the leg
rip not his knee yall
tooru flinched and hatefully glared at the boy but natsu pointedly glared at him right back
‘before you start bitching to me, i was just gonna suggest i can help you and your little plan to woo my baby cousin’
as if he wasn’t irritated in the first place, tooru lit up and he excitedly clung onto natsu
‘really? you’ll really help me?’
natsu rolled his eyes and tried to pry the brunette off of him but he felt the grip tighten
‘listen, oikawa, as much as i like having pretty boys hang on to me, i’d really appreciate if you just back off a bit and actually understand what im saying’
can i just say how long their lunch break is?
and not at natsu trying to get with oikawa and oikawa completely missing it
‘you can go do your education scam system thing while i can go set things up over at that one noodle place she likes’
natsu explained
oikawa was about to smile until he paused and leaned away
‘theres a catch. i know theres a catch’
then natsu smirked, confirming oikawa’s suspicion
‘ill think about what i really want but for now, i just wanna see that one doggie boy you guys have. also, your friend with the big arms��
lmao imagine the surprise in oikawa’s face
‘YOU GO FOR THEM BUT NOT ME?!’
‘why? you want me to?’
‘YES! i mean, well-no but YES!’
‘*sigh*’
thats how oikawa ended up telling the boys about the last minute birthday surprise for you and the help from natsu
‘yea, apparently its her birthday. also, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, you need to talk to natsu-chan’
‘hah?! why?!’
‘THAT IDIOT?!’
you were minding your own business during class until you saw kunimi raise his hand
‘yes, kunimi-kun?’
‘bathroom’
normally, you wouldve just looked away but you noticed him grab his bag when the teacher wasn’t looking which prompted you to sigh since he was skipping class
i mean, whats the point of skipping class when the day is about to be over in like 15 minutes anyways?
‘make sure to come to practice’
you whispered when he passed and he smiled, making you raise an eyebrow bc that was a smile you knew that had a hidden meaning behind it
when the bell rang, everyone nyoomed themselves out of there and you were just walking past the door when a body came crashing to you which made you distracted and allowed a chance of vulnerability
there was a pair of hands covered your eyes from behind, hands grabbed your own from in front, and an arm around your waist started to guide you forward
‘um, just so you know, i have the power of god, anime, and iwa-san by my side and i wont hesitate to kick you in the di-’
‘its so cute when y/n-chan threatens us’
a voice from in front of you hums and you smiled
‘you wont think im really cute once youre on the floor clutching your di-’
‘oi, y/n, ill wash your tongue with soap’
‘yes, iwa-san’
you continued to walk, completely trusting at the hands of your boys, when you felt yourself being pulled to turn a corner
‘iwa-san? aren’t we going to the gym? why are we exiting the gates?’
the boys exchanged a look of amazement at your sense of intuition and the accuracy of your guess despite being deprived of your senses
‘dont think you can lie to us, y/n-chan! how could you not tell us its your birthday today?!’
you heard mattsun a few feet in front of you whine and you giggled
‘its not important’
then kyotani scoffed, you knowing it was him by feeling him twitch by the arm around your waist
‘boke, of course its important’
‘so your punishment for lying to us, we’re kidnapping you’
makki teased and you rolled your eyes beneath iwa’s hands
‘oh, shiver me timbers’
the walk continued, you still being dragged around, and you heard oikawa laugh
‘oh dear, its a sight to see, ain’t it? if only you can see the looks people are giving us, y/n-chan~ a group of boys taking a little girl like you? how could you trust us to not do something to you-ACK!’
you cut him off when you lifted your foot to kick right where it hurts the most
forget his weewee
its the knee
poor child crumbled to the floor and had to be picked up by baby watari
‘oh wata-cchi, youre the only one who cares about oikawa-san!’
you heavily sighed at the exagerrated theatrics of your captain
‘the one day. the one day when he could be a normal person for once’
you grumbled but stopped when you heard iwa laugh by your ear
‘he’s right you know. you technically lied to us when we asked if there was something special’
you shivered and you leaned your head back
‘its okay, iwa-san. we can talk about it after this event. make sure to give me my present, okay?’
SKDLFJSDKFJDSKFLDS GIRL NO I CANT I WANNA JUMP-
but iwa chuckled and he promised you that you would love his present
kyotani’s arm tightened around you, as if prompting you that he was still there and he wanted your attention too
‘careful there, pup’
he warned when you almost tripped over air
‘hehe, i know ill always be safe when youre next to me, kyo-san’
you teased and he was lucky your eyes were covered bc you would see the way his cheeks tinted red
‘s-shut up, idiot! maybe i shouldve just let you fall and hit your head! not like its gonna do damage since theres nothing there anyways!’
you just giggled and he retaliated by pinching your waist to which you squealed and gripped his hands
then the smell of the ramen broth entered your nose
‘are we-?’
‘nope! not there yet, y/n-chan!’
oikawa’s voice made you whine and complain but then he stopped, making everyone else stop too
‘okay, iwa-chan, kyoken-chan, release her!’
both grumbled something about you being treated like a pokemon but stopped when your eyes widened and contorted into confusion
‘huh?’
oikawa grinned and your eyes met to see the way his eyes crinkled, a tell-tale sign that this one was a rare genuine smile
‘come on! lets go!’
you let him take you inside the restaurant until your feet stopped, eyes wide when you noticed the streamers and the cake by the corner
your parents stood with natsu by the table and a large smile decorated your face
‘you,, you did this for me?’
you whispered and the team made noises of agreement
‘we had to do something for you to celebrate the day you were born. its a special day because you came into the world and we were able to meet you’
yahaba grinned and you gave him a big hug but you leaned back a bit so that the others would know you’re talking to them too
‘everyone, thank you. i love you’
they all scoffed a bit to hide their flustered state but they still smiled and each gave you a hug
‘oi! come here and eat the food! oikawa’s paying today!’
natsu shouted, which caught the attention of some customers in the restaurant, but they just ignored it bc theyve seen you and the team so many times that yall practically lived there
‘what?! i didnt-’
oikawa started but your mother came up to him and clasped her hands to his, sharing the same exact grin you have
‘you must be oikawa tooru. y/n has told me loads about you’
excuse him while he descends to heaven bc your mother is practically another you
iwa was already acquainted with your dad so they started talking and you just stood back, observing your two families interact with each other
you were so unbelievably happy that it hurts
kindaichi noticed you and he slinked away from the debate between makki and mattsun to go sling an arm around you
‘so? what do you think?’
you turned to him with glassy eyes
‘im so blessed. so blessed to have these amazing people with me’
poor babie panicked a bit bc he didnt really know how to comfort a crying girl but he just wrapped his arms around you
‘hehe, its kinda the other way around actually. we’re blessed to have someone like you’
he whispered and you giggled then playfully hit his shoulder
‘so cheesy, yuu-kun’
he leaned away from the hug and gave you an offended look
‘but its true! i dont know what we did to have-’
‘Y/N-CHAN! NO! HELP!’
oikawa shouted from the other side, cutting off your soft moment with kindaichi
‘what are you doing, natsu?’
you noticed your cousin wrapping his arms around your captain and trying to drag him away but poor tooru was scrambling to escape
‘we made a deal, didnt we, darling~? i know what i want now and youre going to have to give me you’
oikawa screamed
a/n: can we please pretend i posted this on november 3? bc i was dumb and forgot to post this and KLDJLSDKFJDSKD IM SO ANGRY but its okay at least i am able to publish this haha
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu!! imagines#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu!! x reader#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu!! headcanons#aoba johsai#aoba josai x reader#aoba johsai x reader#seijoh#aoba josai#aoba johsai imagines#aoba josai imagines#seijoh imagines#seijoh manager#haikyuu manager#haikyuu!! manager#aoba johsai manager#aoba josai manager#seijoh x reader#aoba johsai headcanons#aoba josai headcanons#seijoh headcanons#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu!! fluff#aoba johsai fluff#aoba josai fluff#seijoh fluff
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Headcanons for being Jane Foster’s child
Jane Foster x child!reader
Thor Odinson x Foster!child!reader
warnings:
a/n: no not a foster child, jane foster’s child 😌 also im so super glad you liked those!!! hope these are just as good!!! and im genuinely so sorry these took so long
prompt: anonymous: “Hey! I just read the Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader HC and I loved it! Would you do the same but with Thor and Jane? ❤️”
no babysitter = go to work with mom
dr. selvig gave you a rubik’s cube to keep you entertained
“fuck that! here, y/n, you can play my DS” -darcy
“can you not swear in front of my child?” -jane
you thought tonight would be boring, but then your mom and darcy collectively hit a homeless guy with a car!
“holy crap, we’re all going to jail!” -you
“don’t say ‘crap,’ y/n! we need to get him to a hospital!” -jane
ngl this dude was kinda funky
darcy used her taser and your mom covered your eyes, but you still peaked ;)
ride to the hospital
“don’t touch him, y/n”
“sorry, doc”
and the very next day you guys stole him 💕
“mr. thor, where are you from?”
“i am from asgard! it is much different from this realm, but your’s is adequate, i suppose”
“thanks?”
you could see the way your mom looked at him, though
he ate all the pop tarts >:(
she gave thor her ex boyfriends clothes
“yeah, donald was a real ass—” -you
“don’t say ‘ass.’ darcy curses too much” -jane
“sorry, mom...anyways, donald forgot to pick me up from soccer practice like, a dozen times. he sucked” -you
“this ‘donald’ doesn’t seem like a very good man...also, what is ‘soccer?’” -thor
you grabbed a soccer ball and tried to show him how to play but there was some other stuff the *scientists* had to take care of
you were a regular at izzy’s diner (well, mom was) and they always made you cute pancakes in different shapes!!
“ah, it’s a smiley face! that’s adorable!” -thor
“yeah! they like to surprise me whenever i come in. they’re pretty awesome” -you
*your mom literally beaming at how good thor is with you already*
you and thor were drawing on paper placemats
and then he broke a glass and you started giggling hdhshshs
but he had to leave
“no, thor, please don’t go!”
“i hope to meet you again one day, little one. hopefully fate sees it through”
:((((
no time to be sad bc ur mom’s lab got hijacked by the government
“hey, no fair! that’s my diary!” -you
“sorry, kid. there are constellation drawings we have to observe” -coulson
“aw, you draw constellations? wait, not now. you can’t just take all our stuff. especially that! that belongs to a child!” -jane
“sic ‘em, y/n!” -darcy
“don’t listen to darcy, y/n” -selvig
chilling in the trailer and missing thor bc he was the most interesting thing to happen to you and your mom in a while
and you wanted her to be happy even tho he was kind of crazy
“hey, mom? do you want to watch the stars tonight like we used to do? we could make s’mores?”
“that sounds like a great idea, baby! i’ve gotta go take care of some science stuff, so i’ll pick up some s’mores stuff while i’m out. love you!”
yeah she went to go see thor and he kinda got arrested but your mom came back home so you could watch the stars!
“so, do you like thor?” -you
“what? what makes you say that?” -jane
“it’s cool if you do, i think he’s awesome. a little weird, but at least he’s nice”
then thor and selvig came home and selvig was drunk as a skunk
*poking him while he giggles and tells you about thor*
“i wish your grandfather could have met that guy! he would have loved him...i wish you met your grandfather, too” -selvig
thor inviting you back outside
“i’d like you to teach me more about this ‘soccer’”
by the time you guys were done, it was 3am and you were too pumped to go to sleep
so thor told you stories of his home and battle and family
you didn’t want him to stop, you were fascinated by it all
and uhhhh yeah then earth kinda had some vikings show up
they told you that you’d “make a fine warrior one day”
and then yall got attacked by a ????? a what??? a destroyer???????
“get y/n out of here now! they shouldn’t have to see this!” -thor
you were still nearby and saw thor become thor again
after he was done fighting the destroyer, you ran to give him a hug
“that was awesome! can i hold your hammer?”
“maybe someday, little one”
then you didn’t see him for 2 years
which upset your mom a good bit, you had to help her through that episode. lots of sitting on the couch and eating ice cream together talking about how he wasn’t worth her time even tho you missed him too
but he came back! and then your mom sent everything flying bc she had an “infinity stone” inside her and thor took you two to asgard
“y/n! you’ve grown so much, i almost didn’t recognize you!” -thor
tbh you really digged the outfit they gave you, but also you were on another planet? thor insisted on giving you a tour (by flying you around)
“i do hope you’re having fun, little one!”
worrying about your mom simultaneously bc you overheard she was sick
but asgard got attacked and you and jane were confined to a room in the palace, which sucked because you wanted to see it all
but thor sent guards to bring you anything to keep you entertained
“maybe we’ll skip the mace for now, thank you” -jane
after several events that count as child endangerment, this chapter came to an end and your mom and thor finally made it official
loki called you a rodent and then saved your life so you were kinda iffy about him
about a year or two later, your mom had to travel a great deal in order to get some work done, so you were left in the care of thor, who took you to avengers tower
“oh, my girlfriend’s child is an angel! and they’re so intelligent, just like their mother!” -thor gushing to other partygoers
“yeah, thor, your ‘angel’ is sneaking drinks from the elderly” -tony
*sipping his beer* “they’re a growing teenager”
you did have an amazing time interacting with the avengers
and once they tried grabbing the hammer, you knew you had to get in on it (but you failed like the rest)
“don’t worry, my y/n, you have to be eighteen years of age to be able to lift mjölnir!” -thor
“oh, that makes sense!” -you, while thor aggressively shakes his head at the other avengers. he just wanted to make sure you didn’t feel bad you weren’t worthy yet :(
more child endangerment but really what did you expect?
thor went off world and your mom split it off w him but you did have his email so you were still in contact with him
swearing you saw odin on the street once or twice (fast forward)
and then your mom dusted and thor found you as soon as he possibly could, it was so good to see him
he took you in since you were alone now, you moved to new asgard and became prince(ss) of the new land by relation?? makes sense right
basically you and valkyrie made all the calls while thor grieved for years
but he still took care of you
“y/n, would you like to play video games with me? i think it may be a good bonding experience, what do you say?” -thor
“duh!”
uncle korg made you help him with fortnite while thor was asleep
you wished to wield stormbreaker one day
showing thor earth media! his favorite star wars character is r2-d2 dont ask why
he taught you asgardian recipes and you taught him...earth recipes?
when he was drunk he’d ramble on about his childhood and battle and enemies and jane and loki and hela and frigga and literally anything that came to mind
“y/n, could you please get me a beer? and get one for yourself, too” -thor
valkyrie most definitely gave you some battle training so you you blow off some steam, you were glad she taught you how to fight like a true warrior
thor wanted to teach you battle tactics so you could fight alongside him, but he never got around to it
a raccoon and bruce banner visited later on, proposing a way to get your family back, thor was an emotional wreck
his debriefing on the reality stone was tense when he started crying about your mom and everyone stared at you
“hey, don’t look at me. i don’t control the god, i just keep him company”
ending up waiting 1 second for the avengers to come back from their mission, resulting in you being stuck in the middle of a very heavy battle
“y/n, get out of here!” -thor
“don’t worry, thor! valkyrie taught me a few moves!”
“you make me incredibly proud, little one!”
“i’m not so little anymore, am i?”
“you will always be my little one, y/n. blood or not, that will not change!”
victory, but at what cost? it was a rough ride, you needed to get patched up, but your mom was finally home and thor...he decided it was time to leave earth again
“don’t worry, my y/n. i will see you again.” *tearing up* “i’m so glad i got the pleasure of raising you these past few years. i love you dearly, now go be with your mother”
you straight up wanted to bawl your eyes out right there
“well, y/n, you’re next in line for the throne of new asgard. what is your first command?” -valkyrie
“actually, i think you’d make a much better ruler than me. i’ve got to spend some time with my mother now that she’s home”
“you’re so much like him, you know that?”
staying with your mother, who was diagnosed with cancer not long after returning from the soul stone (a/n: jane getting cancer is canon in the comics and confirmed for thor 4)
“i missed five years of your life and now i’m sick, that’s just our luck, isn’t it?” -jane
she was understandably upset, but she also felt guilty
“mom, don’t beat yourself up. everything is okay, we’re still together right now. i won’t be going anywhere, i promise”
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight // @canarypoint // @zoeyserpentluck //
#thor odinson x child!reader#thor odinson x reader#thor odinson imagine#thor odinson#thor#thor x reader#thor imagine#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel imagine#avengers x reader#avengers imagine#avengers#jane foster#jane foster x child!reader#jane foster x reader#jane foster imagine
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danny phantom episode 4-7 Thoughts: (under a readmore because, these got kinda long!)
-the outfit danny had to buy for dash's party. CLASSIC 2000S i cannot stop laughing. And also showing up to the party and everyone is dressed like the trio is hilarious. and further proof that everyone looks good dressed goth.
-dash has a closet full of cute lil bear plushies?? LOVE that. adorable. also his response to danny trashing his room fighting a ghost was SO valid if somone BROKE MY BED IN HALF ID BE PISSED TOO.
-technus being like 'oh smart, u should be a tutor!' then later being like 'forget tutor, be a teacher!' :) supportive king <3 I also really like his upgraded suit/design. AND SPOCK CAMEO??? HELLO??
-the music in this show is super. its so funky. I looked it up and the guy who does it, guy moon (awesome name) also did music for other cartoons like fairly odd parents, barnyard, chalkzone, billy & mandy, AND some actual movies like FIGHT CLUB??? the whiplash I got from reading that)
-sam being rich explains a lot about her, actually.
-I know the moral of the episode was supposed to be 'dont ditch your friends for popular people/spend a lot of money on clothes that arent You to Fit In'. but tbh. it wouldve been easy for danny to have been like 'well, okay, ill come but only if my friends can!' but I get. that hes 14. so. not a lot to say there.
-BOX GHOST IS BACK!!!!! also, danny sitting up and wearing the dress/wig/makeup. umm thats how I dress everyday LMFAO. unironically me. (hate the jokes that boil down to 'haha funney man in dress' tho. but this is a look)
-jazz being protective of her brother once again being like NOOO YOU GUYS BETTER NOT STAKE OUT HIS (actually haunted) LOCKER!! shes aware of how people perceive him and she wants to help :( which is also probably why she told dash to invite him to that party even tho she had no interest in going!! she wants to help him out :(
-gotta say im with tucker on the whole 'should danny use his powers to get back at bullies' debate. 100% yes. let him teach kids to fight back. making dash throw his food at paulina out of the blue? no. but when hes actually about to pick on someone? yeah! for self defense? YEAH! if dash and his friends just threw food at him, I think rather than. idk doing sneaky shit with frogs he couldve just threw it back and not pulled punches if they tried to fight. I kNOOWWW its a kids show so they are like 'if u fight back ur just as bad!! violence bad!!' but. theyre HIS POWERS. WHO CARES.
-like my only gripe is that dash really isnt LEARNING ANYTHING WHEN DANNY GETS BACK AT HIM IN THE MOST PETTY INDIRECT WAYS. whatever they had to add a bully psa episode I guess. I hate it and I hate the way cartoons usually handle it because these methods simply Do Not Work. 'aND YouRE USinG YOur poWErs FOR EVill???!' this is Not Evil. even when poindexter takes dannys body, theyre only being 'nice' bc hes stealing soda for them!! bitches deserve what they get (nothing too brutal bc theyre high schoolers but damn, if they pick on danny he doesnt need to be the 'bigger person' he needs to start biting people)
-SAM TRYING TO SMUGGLE FROGS OUT OF THE BIO LAB?? girl in middle school when we had to dissect frogs we could opt out, also, they came to us already dead and preserved...
-sidney's lingo and the fact hes in black and white is sending me. also, danny is a ghost celebrity apparently for being a halfa?? ok. thats interesting to know
-the DENTIST BEING EXCITED ABOUT THE COTTON CANDY FLOOD IS THE FUNNIEST THING SO FAR.
-I LOOOVE the trope of 'wishes gone wrong'. not crazy about the stereotypical genie, or the use of the dreamcatcher looking design. (also, I KNOW theyre scientists but the way theyre handling a cold...are the fentons ANTIVAX)
-the genie. she. whitewished paulina. JKASDFHKJ. (the ghost literally just being hello kitty???? im dying) 'why do i feel that im special and wonderful? because I AM! <3' paulina ilu self worth queen. felt bad for her also getting possessed by (2) boys later who were arguing INSIDE HER. WTF.
-imagine being the guy trapped in his now flying car. he thought danny and tucker were HALUCINATIONS. imagine being trapped in a flying car with two, what you think are imaginary arguing 14 year olds convinced ur gonna die. i WOULD say this dude is gonna need so much therapy, but he seemed totally fine and excited when they landed (I would be happy too if a chicken was on my head. chickens rule) stoner rights
-sam's bat slippers??? iconic. SO cute.
-I think desiree's backstory is so :( do all ghosts have messed up sad backstories?? poindexter's was sad too...cannot imagine box ghost has any kind of fucked up backstory. but what if. his mom got pushed off cliffs by boxes...........a la cruella... anyway her 'no man may lay a hand on me' iconic. ilu
-I know danny has no concept of how much bras cost but my god dont attack tucker with some girls bra. those are so expensive.
-its really. well its not a GOOD THING he went into the portal and got fucked up, but its good danny was the one to do it rather than sam or tucker. because even tho he was being influenced by desiree and kept getting more malicious and it prob wasnt 100% him...he sucked as a ghost like most the people he 'pranked' were innocent ppl just Chillin and he didnt want to help anyone at all. I think danny is the most responsible out of them but also, hes 14 and shouldnt HAVE to feel obligated to fight every ghost. hes a good kid and wants to, but I also feel like he feels like...responsible for the portal turning on?? because his parents did give it up,, but it was an accident and not his fault (if anything, why was the on switch on the inside. why was it that easy. why was there no safety measures. that seems like smth OSHA needs to hear about). like thats my son. hes a good boy. and hes never done anything wrong in his life, ever. if anyone hurts him im killing everyone in this room and then myself. etc.
-danny's curfew is 10PM????? DUDE. when I was 14...shit I couldn't be out that late, I had to be back at like, 8 at the latest, and my parents had to know exactly where and who I was going with, AND i had to call/text them regularly...is this a case of my parents being overbearing, or the fentons sucking??? the only time i could EVER be out that late was if I was at an overnight sleepover or smth...
-the vultures have lil fezes. why do they have fezes...theyre so fuckin funny 'ask him for directions' 'I KNOW WHERE IM GOING' these ghost vultures are my new grandpas. pick them up, put them in the adopt box.
-'I wonder why those guys were trying to waste dad!' THEYRE GHOSTS. YOUR DAD HUNTS GHOSTS. why is that not a conclusion you'd immediately jump to??
-*jazz voice, clearly disgusted* WISCONSIN???
-mrs fenton with the lab coat and leg warmers and PERM. YESSS STYLISH.
-was going to say 'ew billionaire' @vlad but. super valid he used his powers to assumedly steal and cheat to get that money, thats how all billionaires do it! but ew hes a SIMP. and spending your billions on FOOTBALL STUFF?? you are Not Valid overall. I DO respect the fact you have a castle instead of a mansion. in wisconsin. if youre going to be stupidly rich might as well go all out, torches on the wall and all. I DO like his ghost form's little kitty ears. catman. and his cape! every design can benefit from a cape. and how different his forms look, like danny looks the EXACT SAME IN BOTH FORMS ASIDE FROM COLOR CHANGES. vlad's is like,, I could believe they were different people!! also I love the drama. but dude you are fighting a 14 year old. lame. also he was like, telling danny he wanted his mom and him and like, wanted him to renounce his dad?? WHAT ABOUT JAZZ?? bitch. those r MY kids and they are both important and special. I do agree they need better parents but thats not u sir <3
-I thought vlad's 'little badger' nickname for danny came from the football mascot of the packers, but google says they have NO MASCOT?? so now I'm like?? is it because his hair is sometimes black and sometimes white?? I hate to give him props but thats a PERFECT NICKNAME. theyre also tiny and vicious!
-why did I get so excited that Skulker is back!! its been like. 2-3 eps LMAO. AND THE DAIRY KING. ICONIC I LOVE HIM. hes the nicest guy ever :) more nice ghosts please. danny cannot be fighting alone everytime with no ghost buds like every ghost being hostile sucks :(
-mr. fenton knew vlad was controlling him, but a few episodes ago he had no clue danny was doing the same thing...is it something about how malicious the ghost is?? he just seemed to think his memory had gaps the first time, this time he was INSTANTLY LIKE 'GHOST'. then again in this ep when danny did it again he was just slightly confused but not immediately freaking out like he did with vlad possessing him!!
-'my parents will accept ME NO MATTER WHAT' so. so why haven't you come out to them yet, danny?? if you really think that?? if theres no harm, and you're sure??? if vlad is a real problem, wouldnt that make dealing with him easier, to expose him???? SO WHY HAVENT YOU COME OUT YET?? COULD IT BE,, MAYBE YOU HAVE DOUBTS ABOUT WHETHER YOUR PARENTS ACTUALLY WILL ACCEPT YOU??? 🤔 ... 🏳🌈 I get why people say He Is Trans. I totally totally get u danny.
-sorta unrelated, but it just occurred to me in one of these eps they go to casper HIGH not casper middle school??? theyre 14?? dont highschools usually do ages 15-18? (I didnt go to hs so I might be wrong, if I am ignore this...) freshmen are usually 14-15, could just be a case of them not turning 15 yet but they will sometime in the school year (I say they because tucker said he was 14 too)? I know the show has 3 seasons, so by the end of it will they be older? thatd be neat but usually cartoon characters stay the same age...I love shows where you can see the characters age and grow up, though...three seasons seems like a long time to spend on like, 1 year...
#sanchoyorambles#danny phantom#me on the first post:#its not a liveblog!#me this time: it kinda is. but not in the same format as my tmm one#i like doing one post for a handful of eps bc it saves time#and crowds my blog less#and also i just like talking abt what im watching lol#dp thoughts
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hello i am back once again but with this
https://twitter.com/nonlovso/status/1374142549519122436?s=21
(the op elaborates more in the replies + the embedded one on atsumu) in case u can’t see it -> https://twitter.com/nonlovso/status/1374155371145756679?s=21
i love reading these types of tweets, just people talking about the character in canon, analysing what furudate was trying to depict when he wrote these characters. also the phrase “monsters can only thrive among monsters” ???? fuckjng love that, so much to unpack tbh.
idk i just rlly want to see these characters thru the eyes of the author. it’s hard for us readers when 1) we don’t know the thought processes behind the making of each character, and 2) many characters we only see on the volleyball court. but people act differently in different situations. i know it’s a pipe dream but i always hope for more canon haikyuu content outside of volleyball, just regular slice of life content, just teens being teens (i know haikyuu-buu exists but it’s not confirmed to be canon so 💀)
- 🪢 sorry this become somewhat of a rant. this has been on my mind ever since i started liking suna, i couldn’t find posts / tweets like this for suna so i rlly struggled trying to fully understand him (which irritated me bc it felt like he was a one dimensional character 😡)
The amount of nerdy that I am I LOVE shit like this.
Which you know what is interesting is the way each can be laid out for each characters struggle with loneliness and how Sakusa’s is clearly the easiest to identify and yet people chastise him almost the most (Have y’all ever met only children? They can be a little weird and I’m married to one ok so I get it) But ironically Bokuto is one I never thought about (though I’ve thought in depth over Akaashi’s bc he latches to the 3rd yrs and then gets physically left alone)
Bokuto’s loneliness is weird bc of course when Furudate let out who has siblings (which I got way too nerdy about that bc the family dynamics were real obvious after Furudate gave us siblings to characters) Bokuto is the youngest among three and anyone who’s ever had/known three kids is the baby is almost always the golden child in some way. On purpose or not. Like how much older are the sisters? Are they close? Did they baby Bokuto and that’s why he’s so focused on the team? (bc he needs someone to not really “take care” of him but at least guide his emotions at least) We see Oikawa’s sister is obviously old enough for him to have nephew that old so clearly they weren’t raised too much together (age gap) But Bokuto being the baby among two older siblings (female) in an Asian family really would speak to his need for attention bc he’s 1. The baby and 2. The only male child. Not faulting Bokuto at all bc like, he could really be a dick but he’s not. Which makes me feel like the sisters are closer in age bc if you’ve ever had siblings you know your ego gets to be in check no matter what. Bokuto’s loneliness is just something fun to pick apart bc it’s not exactly loneliness (or at least I don’t see it that way) like out of all of them he’s def seeking validation more than anything it feels like. Anyways- Sorry I’m rambling I like character analysis way too much XD
But god yes the lack of content outside the volleyball realm drives me crazy. Especially post high school in that short 5 year span before MSBY v Schweiden. Which this is my total bias talking but I constantly want to know when and how it happened that Kageyama just, mellowed out. He’s reintroduced not even really with a scowl. Totally unphased by the dumbshit Hoshiumi does, he’s surrounded by little kids (which I still wanna know when kids started to like him bc he’s the only one seen with a lot of younger fans repeatedly) and he smiles like a lot. Growth from the MSBY team always circles back (for me at least) for the four of them being together and growing like that. But Schweiden doesn’t have that substitute brother feel? I mean I think Kageyama and Ushijima get along real well (simpletons) but what about the other teammates? (Hoshiumi still has feral vibes that never leave I love him for that) But Kageyama was with them graduation on basically so who helped him mellow out? Who had such an impact on him that Kageyama kinda relaxed back into his interested, wide eyed and calm middle schooler self who was just enjoying playing volleyball. Like, Furudate??? You can’t just give me my man vibing being sweet and dealing with Hoshiumi’s bullshit and not tell me when it happened?? Was it personal life growth?? Was it the team?? FuruDATE GIVE ME ANSWERS
No one ever really points this out (or at least I haven’t seen it) but the two panels we get of Suna timeskip he’s smiling. I don’t know why but I just feel like that speaks to his character a lot. That he’s actually really a happy individual he just hated high school. He was in the lowest academic class, he loved volleyball but hated any variation of the twins and Kita and he was good at what he did but never really shined over having to deal with everything else. Which I mean he’s def not a spotlight kinda guy but even when they’re watching past games for prep Ukai has to point out Suna is the main point getted for Inarizaki (bc everyone is focused on the twins) I dont know...I just kinda find Suna interesting bc he’s seen as almost mean but timeskip Suna is smiling, chatty with Komori and good enough to be in the top leagues. He always struck me as one of those kids who hated school but was incredibly smart. Which is why I probably liked canon Suna a lot quicker than whatever the fuck the fandom depicts him as. (not to mention the being the older sibling so anyone who’s older knows you tend to be the emotionally calm one to not stir the pot and keep things calm at home which would really explain Suna’s deadpan look a lot just from personal experience as the eldest child)
See now you made me go off, this was supposed to be short but I passed out last night before I could do anything XD Now everyone knows Im a nerd :l
#yes do i think about this shit daily#yes do i invest too much time in the shit furudate DIDNT give us bc i want more#shhh im a nerd sometimes ok its fine#cant just enjoy a fucking volleyball manga why do i have to think so hard about this#🪢#anon#babe ilysm#three.talks#hq!!#haikyuu!!#bokuto#kageyama tobio#suna rintarou
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anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime
piss
ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.
also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo
AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"
"man hands on misery to man, yknow"
THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.
oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.
oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.
the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become
getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"
maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy
MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD
a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols
black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.
became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort
heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based
hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable
he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?
international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?
MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)
alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"
'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'
he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk
he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'
help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"
alright, 1997,,,
2d stuff
loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles
both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac
[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]
SUMTHINK.
truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!
excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room
jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)
i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue
big tiddy nurse mommy,,,
went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??
oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕
messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king
MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP
oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd
but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love
ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh
"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok
jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.
how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.
2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"
"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH
RUSS TIME
oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??
AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.
"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?
"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"
'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.
murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?
"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-
HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.
ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺
HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.
idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"
DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭
went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?
was in a coma for 4 years?
hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.
his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it
PAULA.
HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤
yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure
why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch
also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?
HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD
sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD
MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*
NOODLE TIME
"small japanese person!"
2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!
im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'
noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY
JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA
2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".
THE RECORD LABEL GUY.
one song is all it took i ❤ good for them
just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.
A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK
ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.
MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'
but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"
HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude
nov 31 1998: started recording :]
40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit
KONG STUDIOS 🤲
hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu
webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit
noodle learning ab kong studios omfg
JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD
built in 1739?
the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'
theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE
the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire
murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.
grim weather
the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg
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