#bc there is in fact much more to this story

[coffeefromvoid]

Thxx for the tag! Im not much of a reader but imma try anyway

1. 5 😭 i am an incredibly slow reader and have the tendency to read a few books at the same time so i don’t finish them quickly, and i am in the process of reading more (still all at the same time) but im definitely not getting done before new years

2. Yes! Frankenstein bc its my favourite book ever and Romeo and Juliet bc my school is performing it

3. Bc i only read 5 books/plays technically in their entirety this year (shame on me i know) i’ll just list them bc i enjoyed all of them: The song of Achilles, The Wave, Frankenstein, Spring Awakening and Romeo and Juliet

4. Not really? I started reading Edgar Allen Poe’s tales of horror and i am enjoying them so far, i just can’t finish the book in time for new years. And i really want to read all of Mary Shelley’s works now. Though technically i have discovered Shakespeare for myself so yes?

5. Gothic horror and tragedy. I love sad old books apparently

6. I haven’t gotten to a bunch of history textbooks my dad gifted me, i still need to finish Tales of Horror as i said, but also Metamorphosis. I also still need to finish the illiad, start on the Odyssey and Aeniad and journey to the west. I also wanted to get Dracula but whenever i was in a bookstore this year i didn’t have enough money with me or was buying something else.

7. I don’t use goodreads ._.

8. I don’t set reading goals for myself bc i now i am not going to be able to complete them, though for next year I’m setting myself the goal of finishing books in a timely manner and not reading three books at once qwq

9. Not really?

10. I don’t really keep up with book releases that much to name them at the top of my head

11. Song of Achilles has been out for a while for example, and i just read it this year. Or Spring Awakening is literally a play from 1898 but i only read it this year. Honestly all the stuff i read this year fits in this category

12. The Wave? It was a good book, but because it was a mandatory school read I wasn’t as invested in it as i am reading a book in my free time. The story was very good though.

13. Can’t really chose so imma just say the Wave again for the same reason as question 12

14. All of the books im reading rn but i know it can’t be done RHHÂ

15. I don’t really keep up with book prises either…

16. None? All the books i read this year are old so there is no hype ?

17. SPRING AWAKENING omg this play is so good im tweaking!!! I read it bc im supposed to make a presentation for it in school and i had no expectations going in, but found that i genuinely enjoyed it so much. I recommend it to anyone in a heartbeat

18. 8 i am in fact guilty of buying more books than i can read.

19. Yes! Not a lot bc my town’s library is small and doesn’t have the books i want to read, but i my most recent visit was with two of my friends bc we needed a concentrated environment to shorten our R&J scripts in (long story story)

20. I don’t really keep up with releases or read anything new TwT

21. All the booktok/booktube drama i know is month/ year old commentary i put on in the background but the most recent stuff i recall is the Colleen Hoover stuff

22. Song of Achilles

23. Two hours, as thats how long it takes to read Romeo and Juliet

24. Good Omens, i bought it before the neil gaiman drama came out and afterwards my Good Omens hyperfixation also faded. I want to pick it up again bc it was good just lost motivation

25. As i said, actually fucking finishing my books quicker and not reading three of them at once

Open tagz cuz im lazy

end-of-year book ask

How many books did you read this year?

Did you reread anything? What?

What were your top five books of the year?

Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

What genre did you read the most of?

Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate?

Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones?

Did you get into any new genres?

What was your favorite new release of the year?

What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?

Any books that disappointed you?

What were your least favorite books of the year?

What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

Did you read any books that were nominated for or won awards this year (Booker, Women’s Prize, National Book Award, Pulitzer, Hugo, etc.)? What did you think of them?

What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

How many books did you buy?

Did you use your library?

What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?

Did you participate in or watch any booklr, booktube, or book twitter drama?

What’s the longest book you read?

What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book?

Did you DNF anything? Why?

What reading goals do you have for next year?

[wikiangela]

Hi, a bit late but joining in on the @alliwantforchristmasislou project 🫶

I decided to donate to a polish organisation called the stonewall group (which is why the pic is in polish lol)

chose this one just because im the most familiar with this one, and they do amazing work in support of lgbt+ people and fighting for our rights in this... not so queer-friendly country 🫶

now, ive been in the 911 fandom for almost 4 years now (gonna be 4 in i think February), and i only started after the episode Buck actually bc it was allll over my dash. i binged the whole show in a week, before the next episode is even aired, I loved it SO much.

as most of y'all know, I initially shipped buddie - it was the big ship, ofc i did, i wrote so much fic for them and i had so much fun and met so many moots i still love seeing on my dash 🫶❤️ but it might've been obvious (or not, idk) i was kinda getting bored and losing enjoyment, more and more of my fics and snippets were focusing on other characters with buck or eddie, i wasnt really as into it anymore - but i still loved it and wanted to enjoy it (which ironically was killed dead later on by the buddie fandom itself lmao)

and then came bucktommy and everything changed. initially i tried not to give in but within a few days i had two fics and more ideas lol they completely took over my thoughts. ive never been this inspired to write, to create, I even learned how to make gifs for them (with lots of help from amazing talented friends 🫶🤣) during fall and winter I always get so depressed and sad and having very dark and depressing thoughts (last year my buck driving fic was a result of that lol), and its so hard to find motivation to do anything, even write. but this year, even tho I had a lil crisis moment, i wrote through it and im as inspired as always - i havent stopped writing since april. they're literally the most inspiring ship ever - and fun fact, usually i prefer writing about fanon ships, so this was a huge change and surprise

I always related to buck a lot, and especially once we got his bisexuality canon - checking out and appreciating hot people of the same sex and not realizing what it means is too real lol - and Tommy is so compelling and theres so much potential for so many stories there, I wish the show would do something interesting with him 😭 despite being so confident and cool, he feels like he's holding back some sad, maybe (probably) traumatic backstory that could be so good and interesting - and lou is such a good actor and itd be amazing to see more from him in this role

they wrote tommy as the perfect love interest for buck, and it was amazing to see it on screen, it was such a breath of fresh air to see this kind of queer representation on a network show, it was so gentle and adorable, and they initially handled it with so much care, and id love to see where they'd go from there 😭 the break up broke my heart not only because it happened, but because it felt ooc and abrupt and not at all like that's where the story was going. wish they'd fix it and give us tommy back 😭🙏

and lastly but most importantly - thanks to bucktommy, i met so many amazing friends ❤️😭 even when I was writing fics and interacting with mutuals on here, i was never really talking to a lot of mutuals, not for longer than a few messages, and now i got this wonderful community that i feel so comfortable in, everyone is so nice and friendly, and I love y'all so much, this is the best fandom experience ive ever had ❤️

thank you all, ive been having so much fun since april, i love y'all. here's to more bucktommy in 2025 ❤️

[ckret2]

That one anon you had confuses me bc I don't get the appeal in Bill cipher redemption fics that don't bash on him. Like what is the point if not to make him earn it??? Where is the juicy character development to be had? How can Bill fundamentally change as a person if no one is still angry with him? If he doesn't have to earn trust or otherwise actually change in order to be accepted??? Also it's funny, I love to see a character struggle. I am in love with your series for just the fact that YEAH when you've done what Bill has to that magnitude, itll take an insane amount of time in order to become better. It already took a lot of time to get the bare minimum in terms of living space. It'll be like that when you tried to destroy an entire dimension and have personally victimized the ppl around you.

---> also my ass totally somehow missed they weren't talking about the main fics of yours oops

I'm assuming that anon was using the term "bashing" the way it's usually used in fanfics.

It doesn't mean "make a character struggle and work to improve," but rather "make a character the author hates suffer for the entertainment of an audience who also hates him; make him struggle in order to put him down, not to eventually build him up."

I've seen or heard about plenty of works about/including Bill that do just that, so even if the anon was rude about it, it's not ridiculous for them to mistakenly assume a Bill fic would do that.

Big difference between "the characters are mad at Bill and want him to die" and "the writer is mad at Bill and wants him to die." Bashing fics aren't about character growth; in fact, someone who writes a bashing fic would probably be pretty pissed to see a story about that character growing & improving as a person. The goal of a bashing fic is to destroy a character—either metaphorically by OOCly misinterpreting them to demonize them as much as possible, or literally by torturing/killing them. The kind of people who'd write a Bill bashing fic aren't the kind of people who write about him being redeemed.

I'm a Bill basher's worst nightmare: someone who looks at all the terrible shit he did, acknowledges its full magnitude, writes him doing even more terrible shit, and still wants to give him a happy ending.

[prettypinkporkchop]

Can you do a Plus!Size!Reader x Paul Lahote?

I’m thinking, reader who is Bella’s sister, has been friends with Jacob for years (stayed with Charlie) and she’s always had this massive crush on Paul. Since she is insecure about her weight/ looks, she always avoided Paul at all costs, embarrassing herself too.

One day, she gets dragged by Bella when Bella is mad Jacob. This is where Bella slaps Paul across the face. The reader stays in the truck but when this happens, she gets out of the truck to stop Bella. Paul phases which scares Bella and Reader but he then imprints on reader.

For a while their relationship is just friends (per readers request) until Paul kinda snaps in frustration because he wants to be more and he knows reader wants it too. Lots of fluff and reassurance that the reader is worthy enough for Paul.

Thank you so much, your writing is just amazing and I think you would write this really well ❤️

You're More Than Your Body

A/n: my thick queens!!! I know for a fact that Paul would be obsessed with them thighs! Oh lawd I can see it already!!! BTW I FREAKING LOVE THIS STORY I AM SO BOOSTING MY EGO BC I DID SO GOOD IN THIS! PLZ, I LOVE IT!

Warning: bad language

Paul. Paul. Paul. Nobody runs through your head like Paul. Even now that you're graduated and so is he, you see him around town. Especially since you and Bella are close with Jacob.

You stare in the body mirror in your bedroom, grabbing your stomach in hopes it'll disappear. It would make this outfit look so much better... your heart pounds as tears want to explode from your eyes. The pain of being the "funny fat friend" and always being the butt end of the joke your whole life has really been weighing on you. Even now, as an adult and being stuck on a guy since school.

"I need you to come with me. This is serious." Bella barges in your room.

"Oh, so the sad girl speaks to me now?" You glare at her.

"Look, I'm sorry for ignoring you and charl-.. dad, it's just been.." She stops knowing that you know what she means.

"Edward. Yeah." You roll your eyes and then smile at her. "Okay, what you got?" You ask.

"Jake has been away. They're saying he's sick. I have to see him." She says.

"He's probably tired of you stringing him along." You reply.

She shakes her head and then walks over to you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you down the stairs.

"Uh! Hey! Stop!" You yell.

"I don't want to go alone." She looks at you, still holding your wrist.

"Fine." You sigh.

You both get in her raggedy truck. She speeds up to Billy's house. The car ride was mostly her panicking, and you telling her to slow the Frick down. But, she pulls in with both of you alive. She gets out of the truck and enters past Billy. He sees you sitting in the truck, and you awkwardly wave.

The sound of whistles is heard toward the trees next to the house. You look over and see Jared, Paul, Sam, and Embry. Your heart races as your eyes fixate on Paul. They don't see you. It seems like they're calling for Jacob.

Bella barges out and goes over to them. Your mind blanks out with what is happening. You notice they're yelling and Paul is getting angry. You decide to be the protective older sister and run out of the truck.

"Bella!" You yell and make your way over there. As you get closer, she slaps him. "BELLA WHAT THE HELL?!" You grab her arm.

Paul is snarling. His body seems to get bigger. Next thing you know, he's a wolf. A silver wolf growling at Bella. She falls on the ground, and you stare at the monster. He looks at you and stops snarling. He whimpers.

"BELLA!" Jacob runs out and turns into a wolf, too.

This caught Paul's attention, and they began to fight, wrestling into the woods. You're breathing heavy in fear, but look down at Bella. She's confused and looking at Sam.

"Hey, bring these girls to Emily's place." Sam orders.

"Guess the wolf's out of the bag." Embry mumbles.

That's when you learn everything. Emily and Bella go on a tangent about it all. Embry is cracking jokes, and Jared is kicking him under the table for spilling too much to a 'leech lover'.

Paul walks inside and sits on the chair beside you. He turns back to Bella. "Sorry." He smirks and eats the muffins that are placed on the table. His eyes roam up and meet yours.

You pause. Is he really looking at you?

He sets the muffin down before rubbing his hands on his shorts. He extends a hand and smiles at you. "Paul." He says.

"Yeah, I know." You smile and shakily let your hand reach his. You feel warmth fill up your body. You know your cheeks are burning red.

His smile fades, and he lets go of your hand. "You know me?" He asks, as if he's guilty for not knowing you.

"Yeah. School. We graduated the same year and... you were quite popular with the girls." You snort.

He gulps and looks down. "Yes. Yes, I was." He seems so guilty. But his face turns back to you with a smile. "What's your name?" He asks.

You go to speak but Embry interrupts. "That's y/n. Leech lover's sister." He laughs.

Paul glares at him. "I'd like for her to answer that herself."

Embry lifts his hands up in defense. "Aight, chief. Or should I say.... imprinter..." He snorts.

Jared hits the back of his head. "Bro! That's Paul's story to tell!" He yells.

Sam enters and glares at Embry. "Stop it." He turns to Paul and smiles. "Welcome to the club." He takes Emily by the waist and kisses her.

"What's an imprinter? I'm confused.." You smile and look around awkwardly.

---

"Friends?" You smile at him.

He stares out at the beach, the waves crashing, and the wind blowing. "Yes. I'm sorry for not noticing you. I'm sorry for everything." He turns to face you. "Friends." He smiles.

You sigh of relief and look out at the water. You want more but you're too big for him in your mind. You accepted the bond, but maybe friends will do. At least you'll be around him, and it won't be so bad.

"C'mon. Let's go get food." He stands up and takes out a hand for you.

Yes. You've barely eaten today, and it's four pm. You take his hand, and he helps you stand up. When you're on your feet, he grabs your waist to steady you. That touch has you SPINNING.

"Where do you want to go?" He asks.

"Hm, I'm totally feeling burgers." You giggle.

"Oh, fuck yeah! My kind of girl!" He yells and takes your hand, kissing your knuckles.

He leads you to his truck and takes you to a small diner. It's actually the one you, dad, and Bella used to go to growing up. Now that she's back, the trips here have been more frequent.

He opens your door and helps you out by holding your waist. He seems to love grabbing you there. Honestly, you don't mind, but at the same time, them love handles are ugly to you. He leads you inside and you both get a seat and order.

Paul looks over your face.

You awkwardly look around and smile while blushing. "What?" You ask.

"Nothing." He chuckles and sips his Dr. Pepper. "What's it like being Bella's sister?" He asks.

"Nothing but drama. But I love her. She's very giving to family." You smile.

He nods. "I don't have anyone but my asshole father. I don't live with him, thank God." He rolls his eyes.

Your heart aches for him. You can't imagine not having anyone. "I'm so sorry." You reach out and touch his hand.

His eyes dart toward your contact, and he smiles. "Nah, it's no big deal. I have my boys."

"I guess that makes things better." You smile and let his hand go.

The waitress places your guys' food down, and you both enjoy the night getting to know each other.

It's dark out now, and you're in his truck watching the roads as he brings you home. You're startled when you feel a hand on your thigh. You look down and see his fingers on your flesh. His thumb is rubbing your skin. You look over at his face. He's just watching the road.

---

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Paul is at your window. You know it's him because he HAS to show up every night after patrol. You get up from the bed and open your window. He climbs up and closes it behind him. He hovers over you with a smile.

"Hey." He whispers, pushing hair behind your ear.

"Hey." You blush and soak in the warmth of his body heat.

He slowly leans in, looking in your eyes and then to your lips. No. No. You're too ugly. He's just into you because of the bond. Shit! You don't want to be used. You back away and awkwardly laugh. He gets the message and looks at you.

"Wanna see what I've been watching?" You plop on your bed and pull out your phone.

He smiles and lays beside you.

You show him the YouTube videos you've been addicted to until you fall asleep.

---

You're eating the brownies that Emily made while sitting at the bonfire. Everyone is talking and you're stuck in a debate with Sam.

"No! You're wrong!" He smiles, pointing at you.

You laugh and put your plate on the ground to get focused. "Sam, listen! I'm telling you, the grass is wet in the morning because of the dew!" You yell.

"It's because of the rain!" He yells back.

"Aren't you out all night? On the nights it doesn't rain, why is the grass wet then?!" You're laughing so hard.

Paul, from beside you, gently touches your knee. "He thinks he's always right. You won't win." He laughs in your ear.

"Love birds." Jared smirks.

You look at him. "No, we're just friends." You smile.

"Still?!" Jared asks, shocked. "Damn, Paul! You're taking your time." He laughs.

"Dude.." Paul shakes his head in annoyance.

After the bonfire, Paul brings you to his house. You're super freaking tired, and you fall on one couch in exhaustion. Paul puts a blanket over you and sits on the other couch that's next to your head. The couches are in an 'L' shape. He sits there while you fall asleep. Your arm falls out, and he looks down at your hand. He slowly takes it, holding onto it while you sleep.

---

You wake up and feel a body underneath you. You look down to see that you're on a snoring Paul's chest. You look around and see that you're in his living room. You panic and sit up, going onto the other couch. Your movements wake him up.

"You alright?" He asks in a tired and low voice.

"I.. don't remember falling asleep." You awkwardly giggle.

"You were shivering, so I joined you." He yawns and sits up. "Was that alright?" He asks worriedly.

"Yeah.. yeah, that's okay. Thank you." You smile.

He smiles back and checks his phone. "What you want for breakfast?"

"How about I make something here? If you have anything." You stand up and walk to his kitchen.

"Yeah, I've got stuff. You sure you want to cook? I can do it." He stands up and leans on his fridge, watching you.

"Yeah, no! I've got it." You smile.

He smirks and walks up to you, grabbing your waist. "You're beautiful." He whispers.

Your breath hitches in your throat. You look up in his eyes. "Friends.." You whisper.

He sighs and lets you go. "You know, I can't with you. You hold back so much and you won't let me in." He says in frustration.

You put the stuff on the counter and look at him with worry.

"I want you and I know.. I KNOW you want me, too. Why can't I have you?!" He smiles but is still aggravated.

You gulp and cross your arms. "I'm not good enough for you. All through school, you wanted the skinny girls. You only want me because you imprinted on me." You say quietly.

He starts laughing with anger. "Are you serious?!"

Tears threaten to escape your eyes. He notices and frowns. He pulls you into him and rubs your back. "Nobody will ever compare to you. You're more than your body. And if I didn't imprint on you, I would still think you're fucking hot." He says. "Let me prove it." He pulls away and looks at you.

You smile, hopeful, and touch his cheek. "You mean that?" You ask.

He grabs your waist and picks you up effortlessly. He tosses you on the couch while you giggle. He hovers over you and touches your stomach. "I love this." He smiles. His hand lowers to your outer thigh, and he squeezes. "I love this." He continues to squeeze your thigh. "Oh, the way these will be my pillows." He chuckles. "I love..."His hand moves lower, "may I?" He wants to touch your ass. You nod, and he happily grabs your ass. "Jesus, I love this." He bites his lip and looks over your face. "Most importantly," his hand touches your chest where your heart is rapidly beating, "I love this." He says. "You're absolutely stunning." His eyes scan your features. "I'd show you off to the universe."

You're smiling, blushing, shedding tears, and lowkey screaming inside. Your heart is swollen with love and affection. You never want this to end. Now, you understand, you are perfect for him. You grab the back of his neck and pull him down to your lips.

His lips meet yours, and the kiss is gentle and loving. Your lips move perfectly, and he finally pulls away. "What an amazing kisser." He smirks. "Mine, now?" He asks.

You laugh and nod your head wiping away your tears. "Yes, Paul. I'm yours, now."

[soft-pine]

@angelsdean: #i think cas is good at cutting thru the bullshit and just saying things succinctly (and often bluntly)#and i think he's a good listener and is also someone dean himself actually chooses to open up to#and often WANTS to talk to (unlike w/ sam)#but yea he's not giving dean a therapy session. cas is not the wise all-knowing master of emotion#it's all actually very new to him! he's still getting the hang of human stuff!#and sam. well. he's mr. projection and deflection boy#and pretty bad at his own emotional processing#and should in no way be giving out advice let alone playing Perfect Therapist (and often Queer Expert) Sam#like obvs ppl can write what they want forever and do as they please in fanworks#but when ppl conflate this specific tropey depiction of them w/ canon it gets annoying#bc they very much are not like that in canon

@ilarual: #they are all deeply traumatized people with a shit ton of issues#and they all NEED the space and security to be able to heal and grow#but that doesn't mean that ANY of them are equipped to be each other's live-in therapist#Cas is more emotionally intelligent than he gives himself credit for but he's not a particularly verbose communicator#likewise while Dean is absolutely a safe person for Cas to open up to it's not his responsibility to be Cas's therapist#in fact your partner is probably the absolute WORST person to try to play informal therapist#and the less said about Sam in the therapizing your family conversation the better

@shallowseeker: #cuts through bullshit#also good at communicating without fluff which is what dean tends to appreciate#a lack of artifice

@indistarlight: #he's very blunt which helps dean as its the opposite of literary fictional reference word vomit mixed with vulnerability encased in bravado#but his biggest speeches are all literally when he thinks he'll be too dead to deal with the aftermath#he is very good at showing empathy and care when he's present tho! which i think dean appreciates despite how much it disarms him

@im-some-lionheart: #also Dean is canonically the one out of the three of them who most often initiates emotional conversations..#It don't mean Sam and Cas wouldn't ask him about his feelings but rather that it's most likely Dean's gonna ask THEM first#also what I love about dean and cas' heart to hearts is that it's almost always a variation of:#Cas: how are you#Dean: fan fucking tastic#cas: doubt#dean: ok I'm not fine I'm actually crumbling#cas: *offers support in the form of a killer one-liner or a shared moment of comfortable silence*#Top tier chef's kiss dynamic 👌🏻#which is why fics where they have long open and honest conversations about their feelings always take me out of the story#I'm sorry but it's not just that he would not say that (and he wouldn't)#it's that he wouldn't say ALL OF THAT. These are emotionally stunned and deeply traumatized “straight” (allegedly) Men#have you ever TRIED to talk to a man about his own emotions????#that entire conversation needs to be filled with short sentences tense silences and half said stuff

i think the confession made people forget cas is not really a consistent verbal communicator/processor.

i just dont know if like the verbose and florid speech he'd held in for years and finally spilled on his deathbed is like the best roadmap for how he'd communicate on a random wednesday....

[xheykyjx]

irl story

so. this is heavily inspired by something that happened to me recently. even just thinking about it lowkey makes me feel some type of way, i'm not gonna lie😭

tw for depictions of nausea ahead, under the cut!! 🫶

"i don't fucking care," you're saying, laughing in spite of your words. beside you, your crush is sheepishly holding a dinner menu. the two of you had run a few errands together the other day, and on the way back to your dorm you'd stopped at a drive-thru, where your crush had paid for your food. now, you're out for dinner with them and a handful of other friends, and it's the perfect opportunity for you to pay them back.

"i feel bad," your crush whines, hitting you with some pretty strong puppy-dog eyes. "i was kidding when i asked you to pay for me."

"well, i'm not," you tell them decisively, and you quickly tell the waiter both of your orders: food for you, and food for your crush. they thank you, smiling sweetly, and dinner carries on. the food is delivered eventually and everyone is happy with what they ordered. out of the corner of your eye, you notice that your crush is eating with gusto, spooning bite after bite into their mouth with barely a second between. but they're a pretty big eater, and—at the end of the day—they are an adult. so you say nothing.

fast forward to the end of the meal—the bill has been split evenly (except for you and your crush, of course, because you paid for theirs before they could argue any more about it) and you're all leaving the restaurant. as you step outside, your crush says, sort of casually, "i think i might've ate too much." immediately you're blushing, trying not to squirm or stare as you laugh teasingly. your crush giggles too, and one of your friends makes a quip about them having a rock in their stomach. as you walk through the parking lot, it's impossible not to notice their hand on their belly.

your group came in two cars, so you all bid each other farewell and pile into your respective vehicles. you're sitting in the passenger seat and your crush is sitting in the back, right behind you. it's a short drive back home, but you keep your eyes and ears peeled anyway, waiting for some kind of indicator that your crush is in more discomfort than they'd initially let on. but the ride is largely uneventful, and you're all dropped off outside your building.

as you make for the doors, your crush lags slightly behind you. you almost think it's your imagination when you hear the tiniest burp—this tight, uncomfortable sound that you would've otherwise missed had there been any other noise happening around you. steadfastly, you say nothing. what's there to say, anyway?

you pull open the door and your crush walks through. you're walking up the first flight of stairs when they say, "i'm kinda—i'm kinda nauseous, i think." and—there's no way this is real, but it is—as they're speaking, their throat tightens around a gag, voice going low and tense as they fight off the urge to retch. you're both alarmed and incredibly turned on, and by the time you've made it to the landing they're hiccuping out a genuine gag—it's small but wet, gurgling just slightly in the bottom of their throat. your heart starts pounding.

"dude," you say, laughing nervously, hoping your arousal isn't obvious. "don't tell me you're actually gonna puke." you could almost wish it in your head: please puke please puke please puke, but you quash that train of thought before it fully starts. now is not the time.

"um—" your crush swallows, and you finally let yourself take a good, long look at their face. they aren't especially pale or sweaty, and there's good humor written all over their expression, but there's a touch of nerves there, too. and the fist near their mouth isn't helping matters, either.

[lotus-pear]

rewatched madoka magica again today bc i fucking hate myself and to absolutely no one’s surprise i went through all five stages of grief in a single evening

[dukeofthomas]

I can't find it now but there's a post about suspension of disbelief and how it's broken when the story starts trying to excuse it. "character gets knocked unconscious for hours but there's no further issues from this" okay 👍 "and actually this makes perfect sense because of this and that" um no it doesn't why are you lying to me. like i am willing to ignore the holes and the discrepancies!! all you need to do is let me and not bring unnecessary attention to it!!!

and all that is my issue with the whole robin child soldier argument. like i am willing to ignore it i am willing to engage with the fantasy literally all you need to do is NOT try to convince me that Actually It's Fine Because They Want To Do It or whatever. like literally just shut up about it and i can engage with the fantasy!!

[demodraws0606]

The way people talk about Tsukasa makes me want to murder people /neg

Somehow just because Tsukasa attracted the attention of the younger fanbase, people just have found themselves allowing to dunk on his fanbase because "how dare these 12 year old misinterpret a character that I don't even personally like".

Because yeah it's almost like young people can identify a darker part of a character but overexagerate it because the part that discerns nuance isn't even fucking developped yet. Or you know maybe it's just fun making angst, maybe they're just venting through Tsukasa ?

And somehow these people making angst are somehow more wrong than the people who just act as though Tsukasa is like the happiest guy ever with the least amount of struggles (because how dare he be happy, the only way a person can be struggling is if they're miserable 24/7).

Like it's wild it's somehow the same thing that happened to Sans, it's as though people don't realize that making a character have less problem than in canon is just as much of a misinterpretation than the opposite, you're not smarter for it.

No genuinely what's wrong with people, every other male oc fans get to do whatever and somehow Tsukasa fans are the ones that only enjoy his character cause he's a "dude".

I'm a Rui fan but it makes 0 sense to me how much of us just get away with more because ig it's more acceptable to make angst of rui ????

Like people say "wow people exagerate Tsukasa's backstory so muchh lol", like ok here are the multiple instances of Tsukasa flashbacks :

-Dazzling Lights

-Tenma mixed event

-Colorfes card

-Vocaloid World Link

Wow, yeah really short and rare Tsukasa flashbacks yeah....

And also people acting as though he was fine being alone at home are just straight up lying, like that is a lie the game literally tells you he's not fine blatantly in Dazzling Lights. And if you somehow needed more proof you can dig through the vocaloid world link, his colorfes card or even fucking side card stories.

There's no reason to talk about Tsukasa fans and how exagerated Tsukasa angst is i'm sorry, you're just being a bully and passive agressive to fans who want to have fun. The only time it's worth while to dunk on them is for ableism which IS a problem with Tsukasa fans.

Obviously I'm not gonna police you into what you should talk about but I just think it's really obnoxious and just kinda has been worsening the toxicity of this already radioactive fandom.

Also don't take anything in this post too personally this is just like a scream into the void about this fandom's behavior around Tsukasa.

I'm talking about this also because I literally saw firsthand how just kinda mean people are to others who just have fun.

[skitskatdacat63]

"From triumph to failure is but one step."

+ the usual

I love when I can include paper sketches in the process gif. It's very satisfying to see it progress from a very vague imagining of what was in my head to the finished project.

+ version without text

My favorite sketch was definitely the one where I actually put in words what it's supposed to convey. I wouldn't usually write that down, cause it's all in my head, but it was useful to do so when sending it to other people. I'll go into it more but here it is just as a teaser:

Lmao first of all, I like how I was teasing "Spanish GP" art, but as per usual, it's just thinly veiled au art. IM SORRY, I'M NOT INTERESTED IN MAKING GENERAL POSTERS, THAT'S NO FUN! So instead you will get weirdly relevant matador au art. I like it a lot though, I was really shocked I was able to draw 3 different Fernandos, I mean even drawing one figure takes a lot out of me, but this was weirdly easy?? I think it's just the effect of not being burnt out anymore, and actually being able to draw with more ease makes me feel like a god.

Okay, so the text: "Fight or Flight?" I'll be honest, I don't even remember why I chose it, literally came to me in a vision 😭 But I think it's fitting with the narrative of this piece. Is it better to keep going on, keep fighting, or better to finally give up, and flee? Not that I even remotely think he should give up, but I feel like sometimes I can sense him pondering this very question. That was the big fear before he announced that he re-signed. Keep fighting and maybe, just maybe, you'll get the chance to finally go up against the bull again. Or accept it's an uphill battle and the fighting is going to keep getting more and more strenous, and maybe it's time to put down the sword. SORRY THIS IS SO ANGSTY FOR WHAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE "yayyyy home race!!!" Please forgive me <3

I. Renault

At some point, someone pointed out to me that I had drawn all other iterations of matador Fernando with a sword, except for Renault Fernando, and that ended up feeling very poignant to me. In a bull fighting match, they really only pull out the sword at the last minute to deliver the killing blow. So I think it's important to never draw this Fernando with a sword, because it shows the unfailing confidence and stability he has at that point. He only needs to pull out the sword at the end, as a formality almost, there's no reason for him to keep his guard up at all times.

II. Ferrari

Meanwhile this Fernando, he's considering his sword like he hasn't had to in the past. He's checking the sharpness, making sure in advance he can do what needs to be done. He's on guard, he feels like he needs to keep up his defenses at all times because he doesn't have that same amount of trust and stability anymore. He knows though he will be up against the (red) bull, at least that's never in question. At least there's the assurance he'll get the chance to fight.

III. Aston

Oh, Aston Fernando....He doesn't know whether to take up his sword or finally put it down for the last time. While at least Ferrari Fernando knows he's on constant guard against the bull, this Fernando doesn't even have that assurance anymore. He feels like he can never put down the sword, just in case he gets the chance to strike the killing blow on the bull, which feels like it's growing more and more unlikely.

Spanish flag: ? Lmao this was meant to be something to celebrate Fernando's home race and it turned very introspective whoops. Also got the Napoleon quote in there hahaha, can't escape it!! Shame though there is no French gp anymore, if so I'd probably draw an unhinged thing for it :,(

[lucyshypemaster]

you will NEVER see anyone writing paragraphs after paragraphs hating on keefe like they do with sophie.

[silverwhittlingknife]

hi Silver! o/ because that fanart made me wonder - would you happen to know when/where Dick's stuffed elephant plush Zitka turns up in the comics?

GREETINGS CAM <3333 THAT ART WAS SO CUTE

Yeah, I think your instincts are right - it's a truly adorable bit of transformative fandom, but I'm 95% percent sure it's not comics canon. Barbara has canon plushies, but I don't think anyone else does.

I got kinda invested in the investigation (it's hard to prove a negative!) and I ended up typing out an entire History of Elinore/Zitka, so, uh, if you're curious, meet me below the cut for:

Where does Elinore / Zitka - the animal - appear in comics?

Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?

Where does Elinore / Zitka appear in comics?

We're gonna go in chronological order!

Dick's circus elephant friend was first created for practical reasons: in Batman 436, Marv Wolfman does a big expanded flashback to Dick's circus backstory as a way to subtly show us Tim before officially introducing him (so that we can have a technically-solvable mystery-of-Tim's-identity in LPoD). In this comic, there's an elephant named Elinore who loves Dick:

Aww. Such a cute elephant!

Batman 436 comes out in August 1989. New Titans 60 comes out a few months later, in November, and guess what? When Dick visits the circus, he is suddenly surprised by an unexpected blast from the past! It turns out that even though it's been years, Elinore still remembers him!

Here's the part where Elinore remembers Dick:

SUCH a cute elephant. I love her.

(Guess who else still remembers Dick even though it was so long ago. Guess which other character is about to be an unexpected blast from the past. Guess which character Elinore is directly paralleling guess guess guess sorry everything is about Dick and Tim in my mind but I can focus I swear)

Four years later, in 1993, Batman: The Animated Series retells Dick's origin story. They like and keep Wolfman's elephant, but they change her name to Zitka:

Wolfman doesn't return to the elephant beyond those two appearances, and a few years down the line, New Titans gets cancelled and Wolfman's not writing Dick anymore anyway. So the animal gets abandoned for a while, until Devin Grayson, a fan of both Wolfman and B:tAS, revives the Wolfman-era Titans team in JLA/Titans and then the ongoing series Titans 1999.

Grayson then brings back the elephant in a flashback to Dick's past in Titans 16 (Jun 2000), where she imports the B:tAS name. Sometimes I'm skeptical of TV-to-comics imports, but honestly, I endorse this one. You lose the alliteration, which is a shame, but IMO Zitka is a better elephant name than Elinore.

Here's Dick with the newly-christened Zitka in Titans 16:

Grayson also briefly references the elephant in Gotham Knights 20 and - in a final angsty callback - in Nightwing 88 (Feb 2004), where Zitka tries futilely to comfort Dick in the midst of his trauma conga line:

... And... honestly, I think that's it for comic appearances? The two Wolfman comics plus the three Grayson comics.

Both Wolfman and Grayson are writing multiple titles - Batman, New Titans, Titans, Gotham Knights, and Nightwing between the two of them, spanning a big chunk of Dick's post-Crisis canon - and both writers use the elephant for heartwarming moments of nostalgia, which means if you're doing a post-Crisis readthrough for Dick, Elinore/Zitka feels memorable. But I don't think she actually shows up that much.

For post-2011, I am not as well-informed - throwing this out to the dash? anyone know? - but I feel like Zitka the heartwarming symbol of Dick's heartwarming circus past is, uh, thematically very at odds with the Court of Owls evil!circus vibes, so my instinct is that this story element was almost certainly dropped in the reboot.

Did Dick ever have a stuffed elephant toy in comics?

In WFA, yes; in main comics continuity, no. Technically, I have not read every comic ever published, so I could be wrong!! But I don't think so.

Below, find my rambling reasoning on the tonal vibes of pre-Crisis, post-Crisis, and post-2011, and why this particular story element doesn't seem right to me for the first two.

Pre-Crisis (...okay, mostly the Silver Age): stuffed animal, yes or no?

tl;dr no, requires too much background knowledge on the part of the reader, plus the elephant wasn't a thing until later

Elinore doesn't get created until post-Crisis, but also just generally, pre-Crisis callbacks are more along the lines of this reference in Batman 129 (published in 1960), where, wow, Batman and Robin are hunting jewel thieves - and it turns out Robin recognized this strongman! BUT HOW?!

The comic goes on to recap Dick's entire origin story in flashback, on the assumption that you may not know it.

(BTW, if you'd like to know more about Haly's Circus throughout the years, nightwingology has a great post here summarizing a lot of fun plotlines and characters!)

Basically: Silver Age comics are very self-consciously episodic and kid-friendly; they're not generally gonna do overly-elaborate callbacks because they don't know what comics their kid readers may have randomly picked up or remember.

By the time of post-Crisis, comic books were being written for an adult audience buying from the direct market, i.e. readers who are collecting whole runs & don't need or want Dick's origin story to be recapped to us in full every time it's referenced. That's why in post-Crisis, we get stuff like "hey, neat, this particular soda brand is getting mentioned in several different books!!" or "in order to understand this story arc, buy SIXTEEN DIFFERENT COMICS in FIVE DIFFERENT RUNS and read them ALL ACCORDING TO A NUMBERED ORDER and also you better be following the individual plotlines and recognize these five minor characters who we don't bother to introduce!! Good luck!!" But the elaborate post-Crisis plotlines - and subtler worldbuilding like a stuffed animal callback to Dick's backstory - don't make a lot of story sense UNLESS you're imagining your readers as completionist adult fans.

So IMO a stuffed animal wouldn't be a pre-Crisis thing unless it was The Episodic Story Of the Week, and I don't think a stuffed animal is action-adventure-y enough for the fast-paced storytelling of the Silver Age. (Unless it, like, came to life and tried to eat you or something.)

Post-Crisis: stuffed animals, yes or no?

tl;dr: no, Dick's a manly tough guy, he's not gonna have a stuffed animal, that'd be lame, like something Tim might do

Part of the edgy grimdark adult vibes in 80s/90s comics is that some characters who used to be kinda silly & goofy & lighthearted - like Batman and Robin - get reimagined as Serious and Angsty and Edgy in a Tough Cool Manly Brooding Way. This massively affects characterization for Bruce, Dick, and Bruce and Dick's relationship.

(I obviously love this change & love the tense Bruce-and-Dick interactions, but plenty of fans of the earlier fluffy comics really disliked the edgy retcons of Miller / Wolfman / Starlin / et al.)

The upshot is that post-Crisis is a period when you could have a recurring reference like a stuffed elephant, but you wouldn't have a stuffed elephant, not for Dick. I think a toy like that would be too cutesy / childish / effeminate to give a male character in post-Crisis, unless you were poking fun at him.

Now, you could probably let Tim have a stuffed animal, because Tim is sometimes cool but also sometimes a tryhard loser who is faking being cool and not entirely pulling it off (see e.g. the Robin comic where he practices tough-guy faces in the mirror, or the Teen Titans comic where Conner discovers his cringy Enya CD, or when he's fanboying over Connor and it's awkward, etc etc.). A stuffed animal would be deeply embarrassing, and you'd have to be careful to compensate by having Tim do something cool afterward - but Tim's character concept allows for "he's kind of a loser sometimes."

But Dick isn't!! In post-Crisis, Dick's a tough / impressive / "cool guy" character, the kind of guy anyone would want to be, even in the flashbacks where he's Robin, and even in the stories where he's more lighthearted than angsty. It'd be kinda lame for Dick to have a stuffed elephant, so he wouldn't. I feel like Dick would be more likely to poke fun at it if someone had one, like when he's making fun of Wally for liking the Hardy Boys. Dick could have a Batman action figure, at most, and if he had one he would have it ironically.

Basically: in post-Crisis, a male character hugging a stuffed elephant feels more likely to be a punchline to me, not something poignant. (Even with Tim, Tim could have an embarrassing stuffed animal, but he couldn't hug it when sad - that's too far. Maybe Booster Gold might do this. Probably he wouldn't, but spiritually, he would. Sorry Booster ilu! <3)

Instead, Dick instinctively deals with his inner turmoil like the TORTURED ACTION HERO he is: by punching things and brooding and yelling and joining the mob and sleeping on rooftops and going on obsessive secret missions and acquiring Angsty Stubble!! Just like Batman!

(Technically I don't know if Bruce ever joined the mob but you know he would.)

Anyway as you know this is my favorite continuity and I am poking fun affectionately, but uh, yeah sdfsfdsfs. No stuffed animals.

Post-2011 / Infinite Frontier / Wayne Family Adventures: stuffed animals, yes or no?

tl;dr it's in WFA! Probably not anywhere else, but it could be.

Post-2011 stuff tends to be cutesier overall, most of all in the current Infinite Frontier era. So I don't feel like this would be tonally out-of-line with IF comics. Taylor tends to go for more meme-y references rather than fanfic references, though.

So the obvious best fit is WFA, which is aiming for a rough approximation of Silver Age family-friendly vibes - wholesome, episodic plots, Teaching Good Moral Lessons For The Youth, etc. - plus lots of Easter eggs for fanfic readers and some comic references.

And look, here we are:

Aww.

Whew - that's everything I could find!

Anyway as you can probably tell, I LOVE the elephant, so this was a very entertaining rabbit hole to go down, thank you <3

[aliusfrater]

a fan in this panel i'm watching asked about the cas and collette paralells so i got curious and went looking through s10 for castiel and collette mirroring but i didn't find any so now, genuinely wondering what's being paralleled between the two in a way that also mirrors dean and cas to cain and collette, i just straight up looked it up on here and the num1 reason just seems to be sam omission

[caluupin]

Finished TGAAC around 2 1/2 weeks ago but only finished the doodles today. but still, here ya go!

[sieglinde-freud]

oh im obsessed with this actually… who ever wrote this one i am kissing u on the forehead and hugging you real tight… inigo is such a loverboy im kkkhhhhhhijnsdnfng

[myokk]

As someone who is constantly in awe of you, whether it’s art or writing, how do you stay motivated? 😭💙💖 such talent shouldn’t be legal!

Hi😭🥹🫶 I don’t know what I did to deserve such high praise😭😭🥹🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂💓💓💓💓

I only started writing in January & these fanarts I started in April so maybe I’m not the best to answer but I’ll try!!🫶🫶🫶

Short answer: I’m motivated by brainrot & the characters that move into my brain and demand to be drawn/written😭

Longer answer: I’ve always loved and been obsessed with stories & even before I learned fanfic was a thing last year (I live under a rock), I was always creating these crazy stories in my brain. I used to play the sims a lot for example…I would literally delete every premade family & make my own super complex relationships/generational drama and just watch the chaos play out and I always had so much fun coming up with different storylines and thinking about their personalities and how they would probably interact with each other.

I also read like CRAZY !!! 😳 I am a book devourer & am especially drawn to very long books that have beautiful writing and amazing characterizations:

Lonesome Dove (my favorite book of all time with my favorite character of all time, Gus🥺)

The Brothers Karamazov

Anna Karenina

Ulysses

100 Years of Solitude (100 años de soledad)

Rayuela (Hopscotch) & basically every Cortázar short story

Ok basically every Latin American novel/short story from the 20th century let’s be honest😆

The Mists of Avalon

Jane Austen

Donna Tartt

Etc etc etc I JUST LOVE READING !!!!

And so, even though I don’t consider myself a very good writer, and I would never even hope to become as good as the authors I read, I think it’s fun to try and capture some feelings and emotions of what it’s like to be human💓 I always try to write the characters with love and care and maybe it’s my obsession to make them almost three-dimensional that keeps my brain rot strong😆 I might not achieve it but I’m having a lot of fun trying…

As for creating so consistently, the writing part isn’t so hard bc once I get an idea in my mind I just want to write it! I don’t get oneshot ideas often but when I do I’m like😳✍️✍️✍️✍️ until it’s over😆 I think coming up with plot/ideas/characterizations takes me a lot longer than actually writing - I barely edit what I post because what I write down is already pretty polished.

For my art, I just love the human body/anatomy/angles etc and I have a lot of fun trying to make the drawings have a lot of movement and that’s kind of what motivates me. Art is also my job & so I’m just used to doing it all the time & these fanarts are a fun way to cool down after I do my “normal” art. The more I draw the more ideas I get, and I like to draw scenes from either my fanfic, or scenes that I think are cute but will probably never happen. But THEN sometimes the “extra” drawings inspire things, like my latest oneshot🫶

If you’re reading this and you’re a writer or artist too & look at it differently I would LOVE to hear what you think!!! Since I’m just starting out with all of this maybe there are better methods😆🫶 for me it’s just a love for stories and wanting to create all the time!!!