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junekissed · 1 year ago

Text

happy ending

member — husband!junhui x f reader genre — angst, fluff, hurt/comfort word count — 6.6k synopsis — a pointless argument escalates until both of you need some space, but it couldn't come at a worse time. warnings — female reader, planned pregnancy, there's a big argument but i tried to not make it too toxic (jun and reader have a happy & healthy relationship i promise), swearing, there is a happy ending lots of fluff !! notes — requested by anon — this has been sitting in my drafts for months bc every time i look at it i get shy and wanna change my mind but i'm proud of how this turned out so i'm posting it finally! i know pregnancy fics aren't everyone's favorite but this was honestly very comforting to write so i hope anyone who chooses to read can find comfort in it as well <3 also the last time i proofread this was like april and if i try to proofread it rn i'll get shy again and chicken out so if there's any mistakes pls ignore! i hope you enjoy :)

you sat on the bathroom floor, trying to comprehend the weight of the news you held in your hand. you couldn’t believe it. you could? you couldn’t.

after many months of trying to start a family with your husband, you had finally succeeded. the slim plastic stick with two tiny pink lines was the last piece of evidence you needed. it had been months of carefully tracked cycles, fertility doctors, and new positions that seemed too weird to actually do anything. but now, everything was finally falling into place.

you don’t know exactly how much time you spend sitting on the floor and staring at the pregnancy test; thinking, planning, and thinking some more. but when you finally stand up and place the positive test on the counter with shaking hands, it still hasn’t fully sunk in yet what’s happening. something you’d wanted for so long, and finally it was all right in front of you.

what do you do now? no— you know exactly what you need to do, and it’s a long list of things. the real question is, where do you begin?

you thought back to all the videos you’d watched over the last few weeks. somehow every social media algorithm knew exactly what you wanted to see, and it had given it to you in abundance; baby showers, gender reveals, those “get ready with me - new mom edition” videos. all getting your hopes up before you could confirm whether or not it had finally happened.

with your hopes high and expectations even higher, you were already beginning to plan how you would break the news to junhui. as your husband and your soon-to-be baby’s father, of course you wanted him to be the very first person to know, so you couldn’t wait too long to tell him. you couldn’t wait to see the look on his face.

maybe you’d get a little gift box and give the test to him before dinner. but, then again, it was literally a piece of plastic you’d peed on. surely you could give him… something a little nicer than that.

maybe you could buy a baby outfit and wrap it up for him. but you remembered he’d mentioned so many times about how excited he would be to pick out clothes once you got pregnant. you would want him to have the honor of picking out the very first one, going to the store together and looking through the whole section before finally settling on the perfect one.

what else was there you could do? bake a cake? make a crossword puzzle? buy him a t-shirt that says “dad-to-be”? so many ways you could do it, but none of them seemed perfectly right.

from the other room you hear the door opening, and hurriedly you stuff the test into a drawer, not wanting to tell him just yet. you need a plan first; waiting another day or two couldn’t hurt, so you’ll just have to figure out how to tell him later.

you flip off the bathroom light and stride into the hallway, barely able to contain the grin on your face. you’ve always been terrible at keeping secrets, and with news as big and exciting as this you have no idea how you’re going to be able to hide it from him for more than a minute.

but luckily you don’t have to wonder about it for long, because as soon as you see jun you can already tell he’s in a sour mood.

you know it’s usually best to let him have some time alone when he’s upset, but not for too long because he starts getting frustrated with himself and won’t stop working until he’s exhausted.

but you’re still on a high after everything today, so you decide on being a little bit sweeter to him in the hopes that your happiness will be contagious and that it’ll lift his spirits, despite what was probably a really awful day at work.

you find him sitting at the kitchen table with his head in his hands, long fingers pressed against his eyes trying to block out the light.

“hey, junnie,” you call out, sitting down in a chair next to him. “bad day?”

“yeah,” he answers shortly.

“i’m sorry, baby,” you hum, putting your hand on his shoulder, but he flinches and your hand falls away in surprise. he’s never done that before. weird. you try something else. “um, any requests for dinner?”

“not hungry.”

“alright. well, i guess i can cook up some veggies and leave them out, you can heat them up whenever you get hungry.”

he moves his hands away from his face and onto the table, sighing as he leans back in his chair. “can you just— leave me alone for a while? i’m sorry.”

you nod and stand up. “no, it’s fine. i get it. i’ll bring you some tea later then, maybe. text me when you’re feeling better.” you reach out and gently touch his hand before walking away, leaving him alone at the table.

it’s definitely one of his worser days, you note, so you retreat to your bedroom to watch more videos on your phone, trying to bring back your excitement from earlier. hopefully later he’ll be more open and you can sit down and eat something, and maybe by then you’ll have come up with a good way to tell him the news.

an hour passes and you come out of your bedroom to look for jun, having a question from one of your friends about the dinner you’d arranged to have together next week. but he’s no longer in the kitchen, so you peek your head into his office room and find him exactly where you expect him to be, trying to work himself to death.

you clear your throat before you enter, not wanting to startle him again. “hey, junnie, i know you’re in a bad mood, and i’m sorry to interrupt, but—”

“what do you want?” he snaps, never turning around from his desk. just from the way he’s hunched over his computer, he looks like the most stressed you’ve ever seen him, and your chest tightens with worry before your brain registers what he’s just said to you.

“i— excuse me?”

“i said, what do you want?” he repeats, still facing away from you.

you resist the urge to glare at him, knowing he’s probably under a lot of pressure, and you aren’t trying to add to it. “you don’t have to be rude, jun. i just came in here to double check about next weekend, minghao’s texting me.”

he finally lifts his head, slamming his hand down on the desk. “i’m really trying not to snap at you, but— jesus, you make it so fucking hard sometimes.”

you raise your eyebrows in disbelief, your voice lifting in tone. “well, i’m so very sorry to inconvenience you then, but i really don’t appreciate you talking to me like that, jun.”

“and i don’t appreciate you talking to me like i’m a child! when will you get it through your head?”

his comment stings, but you brush it off. “well, maybe if you’d just talk to me like an adult instead of throwing a fit and hiding in your office then i wouldn’t have to treat you like one!” you’re starting to get tired of how he retreats in on himself every time bad shit happens. all you want to do is let him know he doesn’t have to do it alone, and he’s just… exploding at you for no reason, so you don’t try to hide the snarkiness behind your words.

he scoffs angrily and stands up, towering over you at his full height. “oh, grow up! you’re so moody all the time and you expect me to just put up with it! as if i don’t have enough other shit to worry about, i have to worry about what you think of this and that and everything all the damn time!”

you’ve never seen him get so angry like this, and it’s almost scary how completely different this jun is from the jun you know and love. “okay, jun, fine, i’ll just—”

“no, don’t fucking “jun, fine” me. it’s like you’re doing it on purpose at this point, you act like everything is just so perfect and then when it’s not you act like it’s your job to fix everything! you can’t fix everything!”

“i said fine! just forget it, i’ll leave you the hell alone like you always want!”

he pushes past you and crosses the room in two strides, grabbing his keys off the hook by the door, his hand already on the doorknob. “i need to get some air. i’ll be back later.”

you fold your arms over your chest, trying to look unphased but inside your heart is breaking. “you’re really gonna walk out like that? you’re just gonna run away from this? real mature, junhui.”

he spins around, and the look in his eyes is cold. “if i don’t get out of this house right now i’m gonna say something i actually regret.”

and in a flash the door is slammed shut and jun is gone. you can hear his car starting up in the driveway, and seconds later everything is dead silent.

you stand frozen in front of the door, unable to move. you can’t believe it. you can’t. what just happened?

jun has never just… walked out like that.

his words ring in your ears; though your argument wasn’t very long, a lot was said in a very short time and you can’t even begin to think about how to process it as it starts to hit you all at once.

say something he actually regrets? what the hell does that mean? so he’s saying he doesn’t regret everything else, the cursing and the anger and the pointed words that were clearly meant to hurt you?

minute after long minute passes and you realize he’s not coming back anytime soon. finally you drag yourself away from the door, dropping down on the couch in a daze.

there’s never been a time where you and jun haven’t made up immediately after an argument. sure, maybe you take a little bit to cool down in your own space, but neither of you like letting the tension sit unresolved for very long. so what was it this time that made him leave without even a goodbye?

so many reasons, so many excuses, so many words you could’ve said instead. you shouldn’t have reacted like that, you shouldn’t have kept it going, you should’ve just left him alone. would that have made him stay? if you’d backed down sooner and just let him work through it on his own?

despite all the what-ifs and the doubts in your mind, your conscience won’t allow you to let him worry about everything by himself without at least offering your help. you’re a team, husband and wife, and you’ll be damned if you let him forget that. maybe you trying to help actually made things worse in the end, but at least you know you tried… right?

it’s not until you check your phone and realize that jun’s been gone more than half an hour that you finally let yourself cry. you’d been so focused on worrying about where jun was and whether he was okay that you’d barely even thought about what might happen after this.

will he just… come back and pretend nothing happened? will he come back and still be angry at you? it would almost be worse if he was calm and acted like everything was normal. would he even apologize? would you even apologize? of course you would. both of you said things that were fucked up, and you’ll be the first to admit it if it means this whole thing can be over. right now all you want is to have junhui back.

the tears keep falling but you don’t even feel yourself crying, your face rigid as the tears continue to stain your cheeks.

after an hour you force yourself to get up off the couch and move somewhere, anywhere around the house to try and get your mind off things. but you can’t erase his voice from your head, the look in his eyes as he walked out the door and the way his shoulders hunched from anger mixed with exhaustion.

you find yourself back in your bedroom and you fall onto his side of the bed, wishing you would wake up to find that this has all just been a very bad dream.

it’s after 10pm when you hear your phone buzz on the nightstand and you sit up in a panic, scrambling to see if it’s something from jun. your eyes sting from crying so much, and you blink away the remaining tears as you unlock your phone with shaking hands. your heart drops even further when you realize it is, in fact, from jun, but not the news you want to hear.

you let your phone slip out of your grasp, tumbling to the carpet with a thud. when he’d said he’d be back later you had assumed that meant he’d be coming back tonight. clearly you thought wrong.

tomorrow seemed so far away; too much time to spend alone in a house that was supposed to be filled with happy memories, but now all you felt was pain. you felt it in your chest and in your stomach and in your head and everywhere. the whole room was suffocating, heavy weight crushing down on you from every angle.

you slide to the floor and pick up your phone. you don’t text junhui back. you’re not sure anymore if he’d even read your message.

instead you type in your friend seokmin’s phone number, listening to the line ring as you wipe the back of your hand across your eyes.

as soon as he picks up, he can hear the anguish in your voice and he’s begging you to tell him what’s wrong, but all you can muster up is a soft, “can i stay with you tonight?” because you can’t bear to be in this house another second without junhui.

and of course he says yes, and of course he’s immediately on his way over to pick you up. and of course he stops at mcdonald’s on the way back to his house to buy you something to eat, because you haven’t eaten and even though you don’t particularly have much of an appetite right now, seokmin would rather die than let you skip a meal, especially on a night like tonight when you could really use something to keep you going.

you throw your overnight bag on the floor of seokmin’s living room with a small sigh. in a haze you’d tossed in whatever items you thought you might need; a toothbrush, pajamas, something to wash your face with.

he gives you space for a while as he pulls out the folding bed part of the couch and brings out blankets and pillows for you to sleep with. you don’t say it, but you really appreciate his help. he’s been one of your best friends for so long, and you don’t know what you’d do without him.

you hadn’t thought about it while you were packing, but as you stand in seokmin’s bathroom you think about the cleanser you’d grabbed; your favorite one, the one jun had gotten you for your birthday last year and you’d never switched to another brand since.

every single thing reminds you of him, and you push down a fresh wave of emotion as you scrub the foam into your skin, trying to wash away all your tears.

when you’re done getting ready for bed you find seokmin in the living room with a pot of tea. he was just trying to help, but unluckily for him, he’d made green tea. it was your favorite… but it also happened to be jun’s favorite.

and this time you can’t hold back your tears, and seokmin is sitting wide eyed and bewildered, wondering why you’re crying over tea, but he doesn’t ask. he just reaches out to let you hug him, and you squeeze him so tightly you know it must hurt, but he doesn’t say anything, just lets you hug him as hard as you can and lets your tears stain his t-shirt.

it takes another half hour for you to calm down enough to talk. you’d spent the time watching whatever was on tv, not really paying attention and instead playing everything back in your mind. seokmin had just sat next to you, quietly keeping you company until you were ready.

“jun and i… had a fight,” you say finally, interrupting the commercial playing on the screen.

“i figured,” he says, offering you a comforting smile as he mutes the tv. “do you wanna talk about it?”

“i don’t know. there’s not much to talk about.” you take a shaky breath, remembering it all one more time. “we both said some awful things that we didn’t mean. at least, i know i didn’t mean them. then he just… left, and he texted that he’d come home tomorrow. that’s it.”

you don’t tell him about the pregnancy test. you’ve mentioned once or twice that you and jun had been interested in starting a family, but you’d never gone into detail about it and you weren’t going to now. you still wanted jun to be the first person to know, even though you didn’t know when that might be anymore.

you tell him about other things instead, about your day at work and your plans for the weekend. eventually you finish your tea, and seokmin retreats to his own room and shuts the door with a quiet click, leaving you alone in the quiet of his living room.

it takes you a long time to fall asleep, but soon your exhaustion catches up with you and you let yourself rest, physically and emotionally drained. at least the silence here isn’t as bad as the silence at your house.

across town in his friend seungcheol’s guest bedroom, jun can’t stop tossing and turning. he’s fucked up, he knows he fucked up, big time.

why did he leave? he shouldn’t have left. you had been absolutely right, he was running away from everything and it was stupid and dumb and immature. but in that moment all he could think about was what the next awful thing he might say to you was, and he knew if he had stayed for any longer he wouldn’t have been able to stop what came out of his mouth. he was out of control, and immediately he knew it.

not even the worst day in the world could make you deserving of all the things he said to you. you were the only thing that wasn’t bad in his life; even on shitty days like today, all you did was care about him. and all he did was hurt you.

jun barely sleeps that night, finally forcing himself out of the extra bed at dawn. he’d been too anxious to sleep, too frustrated with himself to do anything other than think about everything he did and wonder if you were okay without him.

he’d already gotten an earful from his friend last night, and he knew he was still in big trouble. the things he said wouldn’t just go away overnight. in fact, they’d probably gotten worse by leaving them to build up overnight, and again he’s kicking himself for ever leaving in the first place.

he packs up his things as quickly as he can, eager to get home and see you again. on his way out the door, he thanks seungcheol for letting him stay the night and he apologizes for bothering him so late.

“i’m not the one you need to apologize to. you better figure out how to fix this, jun.”

with a straight face he nods, bowing his head as he closes the door.

in his car, jun takes the long way home, trying to find an open grocery store. he knows it won’t make up for how he acted, but the very least he can do it buy you a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

he walks through the aisles, basket in hand, trying to think of something else for you. maybe he’ll get the ingredients he needs to make your favorite dinner tonight; he hadn’t eaten last night, though you had offered to cook for him and he’d shot you down.

he feels another pang of guilt at the thought, remembering yet another kind gesture you’d tried to give him that he’d brushed off like it meant nothing. it meant everything to him, and in the middle of the frozen vegetables aisle he swore he wouldn’t ever do it again.

he’d taken you for granted, and he was so lucky that things hadn’t ended worse than they did. he could’ve said something truly unforgivable, or he could’ve even lost your relationship altogether. but he was still yours, and you were still his, and he would just have to work extra hard to make sure you knew how sincere he was.

he’d been a little worried that you hadn’t texted him back last night, seeing that you’d read his message but never responded. you were probably still hurt, and he didn’t blame you; still, he’d hoped you would say something back.

with grocery bags loaded full of ingredients for dinner and the special things he’d bought for you, the drive back home feels a little more hopeful.

he plans out everything he’ll do in the car. he’ll bring the groceries in and put them away quickly; it’s still fairly early in the morning, so hopefully you won’t be awake yet. he’ll arrange your flowers all nice in a pretty vase, and he’ll come in and wake you up with the best apology of his life and hopefully a really big hug. after the last 24 hours he really could use a hug, and he’s sure you could too. and then he’ll explain how sorry he is and how he didn’t mean any of it and then everything will be better again. yes, everything will be okay.

the first part of his plan goes perfectly. he sneaks into the house and when he’s met with silence he continues putting everything away, quietly so he won’t wake you up in the other room. then, he puts the flowers in a vase and with everything in place, he walks down the hallway to finally face you.

but when he twists the bedroom door handle, the bed is made and the room is empty. you aren’t there.

he frowns, leaving the room and poking his head into the bathroom, then his office. he calls your name loudly, hoping you’re just in a corner of the house and you’ll come out once you hear him. but no reply.

he goes back into the living room and sets the vase down on the coffee table, trying to think. you aren’t usually up this early, but maybe you hadn’t been able to sleep and you’d gone out for a walk, or maybe you’d gone to the store to get more cereal?

a sinking feeling rises in his chest, and he walks back into the bedroom to confirm something, sliding open the closet door to check. your overnight duffel bag is gone.

he ducks back into the bathroom to check something else. your toothbrush isn’t sitting in the jar like it usually is. he slides open the bathroom drawer to check one more thing, and—

his hand freezes on the knob, staring at something in the drawer that wasn’t there before. he’s not sure it is what he thinks it is, but either way there it is, clear as day in front of him: a little white piece of plastic, sticking out from underneath a tissue.

gingerly he pulls it out, holding it up to the light to see it better. when he sees the two pink lines he nearly drops it in shock, but he stops himself, setting it gently on the counter instead.

this is something special, something precious, and he knew he had to take care of it. you’d saved it for a reason; you could’ve easily just thrown it away once you knew the results, but you had kept it instead. were you going to give it to him?

he covers his mouth with his hand, still staring at the stick sitting on the edge of the sink. it was just a cheap piece of plastic, but to him it was the most important thing in the entire world.

he deflates when he realizes you’d probably been planning on telling him last night, before he’d blown up at you. if he’d been paying attention to anyone other than himself, he would’ve noticed your mood was happier than usual, your face glowing with contained excitement. he should’ve been paying attention.

there’s a sense of urgency in his stride as he dashes around the house, looking for any other sign of you, but it’s clear you weren’t there. there were so many places you could be, he can’t even begin to think of where to look. your parents, friends, family; hell, you could even have stayed in a hotel, alone and upset. he should’ve been there. none of this should’ve ever happened.

immediately he presses the speed dial for your phone, but of course– no answer. he calls again, and again you don’t pick up. he curses, resisting the urge to slam his phone down on the table in frustration. no, he has to stay calm. that’s what got him into this whole fucking mess in the first place.

he remembers that your parents are out of town on vacation, so you probably wouldn’t have gone there. you wouldn’t have gone to a hotel because you always lecture him about the importance of saving money “just in case”, so you wouldn’t have paid to stay somewhere. your sister is still in college and shares an apartment with three other people, so probably not the best idea either.

that narrows it down to one of your friends’ houses; seokmin, who lives a couple blocks away, or joshua, who lives on the other side of town.

he figures seokmin is his best bet, so jun takes a deep breath and finds the contact in his phone.

“what do you want?” seokmin’s usually cheery voice has an edge to it today, and jun knows he’s picked right.

“is she there?” he asks anxiously.

“she is,” he confirms, and jun exhales, letting out the breath he had been holding in. “but she’s asleep still. i’ll let her know you called.”

“wait,” jun adds quickly.

the line is silent for a moment, and he’s afraid seokmin’s already hung up, but finally he gets a response. “what is it?”

"can i–are you sure? please," jun pleads. if he could just talk to you, just explain what happened and that he's so fucking sorry—

“hold on,” seokmin says, and the phone goes quiet again.

jun’s heart is in his throat as he waits for a response, and he stops when he finally hears your voice. “hello?”

he breathes a sigh of relief. “sweetheart. i’m so sorry.”

you don’t reply, so he continues.

“i’m glad you’re okay,” he starts, trying to put the right words together. “i shouldn’t have said any of that last night, and i shouldn’t have left. i didn’t mean it. i’m sorry.”

“thanks” is all you say, and he hates how small and sad your voice sounds. it’s his fault you sound like that.

“i found your test,” he bursts out, unable to hide his excitement any longer.

“oh." you pause, swallowing. "so… you know.”

“yes, i do know, baby. i’m so sorry, if i had known before—”

you cut him off, your tone suddenly rising with anger. “‘if you had known?’ so you won’t yell at me if i’m pregnant, but you’re just fine with yelling at me when you think i’m not? is that the only reason why you’re even apologizing to me right now?"

“no— fuck, no, of course not. i shouldn’t yell at you, period. and i’m not going to ever again.” jun pauses for a second, rubbing his hand over his eyes. he’s done nothing so far but make everything worse. “i really messed up, honey, and i’m sorry. i can’t say it enough. but— please, come home. i don’t want to talk over the phone.”

you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to will away the tears that threaten to fall again. you don’t want to cry about this anymore. “okay,” you say finally. “i’ll be home in a little while.”

“thank you,” jun says, and the way his voice breaks makes your heart sink. you can tell he feels awful about everything, and you do really, really miss him.

“…i love you," you add, changing your mind at the last second.

“i love you, too!” he says immediately. “i love you, too, honey. text me when you’re on your way.”

“i will.”

he says “i love you” twice more before you end the call. you sit in silence for a second, processing everything before you stand up off the couch and head to seokmin’s room to give him back his phone.

"can you take me home now, please?" you tell him softly, and immediately seokmin stands up and hugs you, his arms wrapped tightly around you.

"of course. let me know when you're ready."

half an hour later you find yourself in the front seat of seokmin’s car once again, this time sitting nervously in his driveway as he puts your bag in the trunk for you. you're still not sure if you're ready to face jun yet, but you know you have to.

reluctantly you unlock your phone and open your text messages with jun, your eyes landing on the text he'd sent last night that had gone unreplied. with shaky fingers you type out that you're leaving seokmin’s house, and jun replies almost instantly with a long string of heart emojis.

seokmin gets into the car and starts it, and you exhale and set your phone in the cupholder.

"are you okay?" he asks, turning to look at you. "because you can always let me know if you need anything. anytime, day or night."

"i'm alright," you say, taking a deep breath. "i'm fine. but thank you, seok. i really appreciate everything."

he smiles, shifting the car into reverse. "of course. it's no problem at all."

the second he hears the car pull up outside the house, jun jumps up off the couch, smoothing his shirt down anxiously. through the window he watches seokmin hand you your bag and close the trunk, giving you one last hug before he gets back in the car. he doesn't drive away until you're at the front porch, and with a deep breath jun swings open the door, before you can even knock.

you both stand there in silence for a second before he blurts out another apology. "i'm sorry," he rushes to say. "i'm really sorry."

you give him a weak smile. "can i maybe… get in the house, first?" you ask quietly, motioning with your free hand at the doorway.

"yeah, i— yeah, shit, of course," jun says as he practically jumps out of your way, holding the door open for you to walk inside.

you set your bag on the floor by the couch as he closes the door behind you. the sound of the lock clicking seems too loud in the uncomfortable silence that settles over the room.

"can… can i give you a hug? please?" he asks, and you stay quiet but nod.

he closes the distance between you in one stride and wraps his arms around you, squeezing you so tightly and holding you close to his chest. "i'm so sorry, honey. i didn't mean any of it. i promise."

"i believe you," you finally manage, your voice a little muffled from how he's pressing you against him.

he doesn't say anything more, just holds you and holds you, and it feels so good to be home where you belong. there's a lot that needs to be said, but for right now you don't need any more words. you're just glad to be back together again.

after a while you pull your head away from him so you speak. "i'm sorry."

"why are you apologizing? you didn't do anything wrong, baby. i'm the one that needs to be apologizing."

you shake your head. "no. i said some things last night, too. granted, not as bad as you, but…"

jun breaks out into a grin at your joke, and you feel your mood start to lighten. "…which is true. and i'm sorry."

"jun, you can stop apologizing now. i get it, you're sorry. you don't have to tell me a million times," you say, trying to laugh a little.

now it's his turn to shake his head. "well, i'm going to anyway. because i am sorry." you look away from him, feeling embarrassment start to boil up, but he continues talking. "i'm serious. i'll say it as many times as it takes to make it right."

you turn your head back to him, struggling to keep a straight face. "why did you leave, jun?" you ask softly.

he takes a deep breath, and still trapped in his arms you can feel his chest expand with the breath.

"it was stupid," he says finally. "i left because i didn't want to stay and risk hurting you more. but i realize i did that anyway, by leaving. i was just… i needed some air. but i shouldn't have stayed away, and i'm not gonna do that again. i won't do it, ever again."

"i just don't want you to leave me," you manage, trying and failing to hide the crack in your voice as you feel your eyes start to well up with tears.

he hugs you tighter and one of his hands comes up to cup the back of your head, gently smoothing your hair with his thumb. "i know, baby, i'm sorry. i'm not going to, i promise."

you don't respond, but you know he's telling the truth. the last 24 hours have been hell for the both of you, and you don't doubt he means every single "i'm sorry" he's said.

"so…" jun starts, and you tilt your head up at him.

"so?" you know what he's going to say next, and despite the excitement you had yesterday you feel yourself dreading this part of the conversation.

"you're pregnant?"

you sigh, looking down and avoiding his eyes. "yeah."

he hums. "but you don't sound excited?" he asks.

"well, i was, last night."

"i'm sorry," he winces. "do you wanna tell me now and i'll pretend this didn't happen and i don't know about it?"

you shake your head. "no, it's fine. the moment's kinda… ruined, already."

he sighs. "yeah, i know. i'm sorry i ruined it."

"i said it's fine, jun."

"no, it's not fine," he says firmly. "it's one hundred percent my fault. this is important to you, and to us, and we should be celebrating right now. last night should never have happened."

"jun, it's in the past. it was messed up, but i forgive you," you say, lifting you head to look at him once more. "it's not a big deal. we're okay now."

"i just want you to be happy about it," he says with a sniff. "we've been trying for so long, and finally…" he trails off, staring at you with watery eyes.

you smile at him. "i am happy about it, junnie. i'm so happy, you can't even believe."

"did you tell seokmin?" he asks, and his brows furrow when you shake your head no.

"no, i didn't. i wanted you to be the first i told," you say shyly. "i knew you would want to be the first to know."

"i love you so much," he says, still hugging you. he's never going to let you go, never again. "do you know how far along?"

"no, i didn't go to the doctor. probably like two or three weeks, though, if i've been counting it right."

"wow," he sighs, a smile on his face as he stares off into the distance behind you. "i can't wait."

you watch his eyes, practically able to see the thoughts running through his head.

after a while he loosens his grip around you, moving to swipe at his eyes quickly with the back of his hand. "well—anyway," he starts, giving you an awkward chuckle. "i bought stuff for breakfast. if you haven't had any, yet. and i'm making dinner tonight, too."

before you can even respond his eyes widen, like he's just now remembering all the things he had planned, and he lets go of you, bounding into the kitchen. he returns seconds later with a huge glass vase full of flowers, practically tripping over his own feet in his rush to hand them to you. "and i got these for you, too. sorry they're not the best, it's all the store had this morning."

"junnie, if this is the best the store had, then i don't think i wanna see their best," you laugh, holding the flowers up and admiring the dozens of bright blooms. "this is gorgeous, but you really didn't need to get me anything."

"but i wanted to," he counters, still running around the room to grab the gift bag sitting by the couch. "consider it an 'i'm very sorry' slash 'congrats you're having a baby' gift."

you set the vase down on the table next to you and take the bag from him, pulling out the tissue paper and crumpling it into a ball.

"i didn't have a whole lot of time to look this morning, but i found these," he says nervously, waiting for your reaction.

from the bag you pull out a miniature plastic hanger holding a set of tiny pajamas covered in little kitties, attached to a matching set of striped orange socks.

"i wanted to be the first person to get you baby clothes," he explains as he fidgets with his hands.

"i knew you would," you smile at him, setting the empty bag and the clothes on the table along with the bouquet of flowers. "and they're perfect. they're so… you."

you throw your arms around his neck, pulling him back in for another hug. "i love all of it. thank you, jun."

he grins, rocking you back and forth in his arms and leaving kisses all over your cheek. "i love you too, baby. i missed you so much. i won't ever do that again."

"i know," you smile. "now… you promised me breakfast, isn't that right? because i'm starving. crying is exhausting."

he laughs. "no crying anymore. and i did promise you that, so tell me: do you want blueberry waffles, or strawberry?"

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#kflixnet #k-labels #🌃 : june.writes #jun fluff #junhui fluff #svt fluff #seventeen fluff #svt angst #seventeen angst #jun angst #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #jun scenarios #jun x reader #seventeen x reader #g: seventeen #m: junhui #c: angst #c: fluff

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likesunsetorange · 10 months ago

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“mikasa and eren are antisocial af so they probably end up talking bc they’re little losers lol, and eren probably can tell mikasa is bored and here’s this gorgeous model, so he’s gonna whisk her away and they go to his ranch they have a romantic night under the stars and all that but he’s dumb and doesn’t get her number and she goes back home to ny without it”

DORKS!LOSERS!*AFFECTIONATE*

them slipping out of the room all giddy!!!!!!!!!! him not getting her number is sooodooooso my doodoo head…….. he’s already resigned himself to being a notch on her post, a lover if one may (can he call himself that? he will in his head anyways!)

like a global model would’ve never taken a relationship with him seriously so he’s should just treasure the moment then boom she shows up! and if we’re really leaning into the romcom of it all it’s during like crazy rain, her car gets stuck, she trucks herself to his doorstep by foot, and he stares slack jawed when he opens the door to se her <3

omg anon i was using your ask to draft a drabble and then this little incident of mikasa showing up to eren’s house has since spiraled further so we will be compiling all the ideas into one and since i had already been writing on this one we’re still gonna use yours lol!

also very much enjoying the dramatics and hallmark vibes here like is that just the energy i exude? extreme unseriousness and hallmark level corniness lol??

but fuck it drabble let’s go 🦅🦅🦅

(this actually ended up being so long lol 1.6k so enjoy!)

The rain only started falling harder every minute longer Mikasa continued to drive down the gravel road, the pitch black of the country sky only adding to the lack of visibility. She gripped the steering wheel hard, trying to focus on what little bit of the road she could see. The high beams of the rental car were doing little to nothing to help her see, only adding to her anxiety.

Her only saving grace was the fact that the GPS was telling her she was only five minutes away from Eren’s house—the last place she should be on a Wednesday night in the middle of April—not to mention she was halfway across the country, in the middle of nowhere, driving down a country road to see a man who’d she had only seen once.

Had it been her best idea? No. Was she still doing it? Absolutely.

There had been few times in her life when she had run off pure spontaneity, and she would allow herself this one instance of a lack of sensibility. It certainly wasn’t wise to book a flight in the act of impulse after finding out said man would be free all week, a pause in his hectic schedule, a schedule she had acquired by coercing her assistant to do some potentially not-so-legal things.

But the ticket had been bought. The rental car reservation had been made. So there was no turning back. (There certainly was opportunity to turn around, but Mikasa didn’t want to give herself any potential out or else she wouldn’t ever commit to doing so.)

So here she was, 0.75 miles from his house, running off pure adrenaline, rehearsing the speech she and Sasha had prepared.

“Hi, Eren. I know this is sudden, but I probably should’ve asked you for your number before leaving. I had to come back to Texas for another shoot, so I thought I would stop by.”

Maybe it was partially based on a lie, but tomato, tomato. It would be fine, she would be fine, and she told herself that all of this certainly wouldn’t blow up in her face.

Until that was precisely what happened.

She had been driving down the curve that led up to Eren’s ranch house when she felt the car jerk, suddenly drifting off the road, before halting to a stop, the Low-Pressure light immediately flashing on. As soon as she saw the lights flash on, she immediately knew one of the tires had blown out, leaving her stranded in the pouring rain just outside of Eren’s house.

“Fuck,” she muttered under her breath. Mikasa leaned her head against the steering wheel, her stomach beginning to pool with regret.

“Do you think it would be weird if I just showed up at his house?”

Yes, Mikasa. It would be weird—it’s fucking insane of you, she thought to herself. And you certainly wouldn’t be in the fucking predicament you are in now if you just called him like any sane other sane person.

Mikasa glanced at her phone, the GPS alerting her she was only 0.25 miles from his house, and the weather app telling her the rain wouldn’t stop for at least the next four hours.

She sat there weighing her options.

Call a tow truck, and stick out the wait in her car

Walk to Eren’s house

Mikasa could see the lights of his house shining through the rain like a lighthouse in a stormy sea, signaling a potential safe return. At this point, she had already risked so much—her pride, her sanity, and almost her life had the tire incident gone any worse—what more did she have to lose?

She shut off the car, grabbed the keys and her phone—leaving her other belongings so if she needed to do a walk of shame back to her car, at least she’d be traveling light—and shoved on a jacket, thankful to whatever higher power she decided to bring one with her on the plane that day.

Mikasa told herself that if she ran as fast as she could, she would be there quickly, but she didn’t anticipate having to trek through mud, puddles, and essentially pitch black to make it to his front porch. By the time she made it up the steps, her white shoes were ruined, her white tank top was practically see-through, showing every lace detail of her black bra, and her bangs were plastered to her face. (Suddenly, there didn’t seem to be any point in asking how she should do her hair.)

There wasn’t much left to do but ring the doorbell, and at this point, she didn’t have anything left to lose, so she jammed her finger against it, giving herself no opportunity to back out. She heard the chime echo through his house while she stood there fiddling with her thumbs, trying to ring out as much water as she could from her hair, trying to make herself look the least bit presentable.

She heard the low timbre of a man from the other side of the door before the fumbling of the lock and doorknob snapped her attention forward. Mikasa felt her heart get stuck in her stomach as she saw the door pull back, Eren’s tall frame coming into view.

Mikasa had to stop herself from letting her jaw drop when she saw him; the first time she saw him practically paling in comparison to how he looked right now. From the fact that he had no shirt on, allowing her to see just how much muscle he had from all those days he spent working hard, to the sweats that hung low on his hips, leaving little to her imagination. He even looked prettier when he was home, as if the sense of comfort it brought him added an extra glow to his face.

His hand was clenched around his phone, holding it to his ear when he finally spoke, breaking Mikasa out of her ogling.

“Hey mom, I’m gonna have to call you back later… No ma’am… Yes ma’am, I will. I promise… I love you too… Okay, bye. Talk to you tomorrow.” His voice was velvety when he spoke, something about the way he spoke sweet and rich, a sound Mikasa didn’t think she’d ever get tired of.

Eren stared at her blankly once he hung up the phone, dumbfounded that she was standing on his front porch, not to mention that she was muddy and drenched from the rain.

The two of them were stuck in a staring contest, neither of them able to formulate words—all of Mikasa’s confidence had suddenly flown out the window, leaving her at a loss for words, because as soon as she opened her mouth, she knew she would be babbling like an idiot.

“Umm… Hi?” Eren said, his greeting coming out more like a question than anything.

“Hi,” Mikasa somehow managed to squeak out.

“Umm…” He repeated, still at a loss for words.

Mikasa’s mind, a jumbled mess, opted to go for it, knowing her babbling would be better than whatever awkward mess this was.

“You forgot something,” she said blankly.

Eren looked at her confused, his brows furrowing, “What?”

“You didn’t ask for my number the last time we saw each other. You forgot to ask me for it when I left here,” she said, stepping closer to where he stood in the doorway.

“You wanted me to ask you for your number?” Eren stared at her in disbelief, whether it was because he was shocked at her words or that she dared to show up and say them; Mikasa didn’t know.

“You brought me to your ranch, took me on a ride on horseback underneath the stars, called me beautiful, and then still didn’t ask me for my number. You didn’t even try to kiss me.”

“Did you want me to?” Eren said as his eyes flickered to her lips.

“Do you really think I would fly across the country on a whim and walk a quarter mile in the rain if I didn’t want you to ask me for my number or kiss me, Eren?” Mikasa asked.

She stood before him, glancing up at him, her face merely inches away from his. She could see how long his lashes looked beneath the porch light, the strands of gold and bronze within his hair, and the plush pink of his lips—right where she could kiss him.

“Mikasa, you walked a quarter mile in the pouring—”

He didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before Mikasa pushed herself upward, so her lips met his, her hand steadying itself on his broad chest. He tasted like sweet tea and a touch of Chapstick, his lips as soft as she could have imagined. His hands steadied on her waist, bringing her closer to him. She relished in the way he felt before the reality of the situation began to plague her mind—clarity being her cruelest enemy.

Maybe it was the second-guessing running through her head, but the sudden urge to pull away instantly flooded through her mind before she jerked herself back.

“Hey, don’t do that,” Eren’s voice immediately rang through her ears as she pulled away. “Who said I wanted you to stop?”

“Oh, did you not?”

“You show up on my doorstep with all these questions, then kiss me, and now you’re surprised I wanted to kiss you back?”

“Umm… maybe?”

Eren didn’t give her much time to think before he picked her up and walked her into his house. “How about I let you into my house so you don’t end up sick from being drenched in the rain, get you some dry clothes, and you can ask me all the questions you want?”

“Okay,” she responded shyly, her face flushing red at his directness.

“Never met a girl so pretty and bold before, surely I have to keep you around.”

#cowboy x model au #vic’s drabbles #asks #eremika

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aranciadotcom · 3 months ago

Text

since i posted screenshots of that one sb fanfic (if you've seen that post, i'm so sorry 💀), the thought has lingered in my head to share some fics that are actually enjoyable to read:

(unfinished)

when i first saw this ff, i thought it wasn't really going to be all that good but BOY WAS I WRONG

it was really fun to read and it felt like an episode of sb but extended and not in the typical sb formula! the last update was from april of last year, sadly...

oh... and the kids get kidnapped x

(finished (?))

one of the fanfics that i would read again and again is definitely this one! this also felt like an episode of sb too (if you minus the shipping stuff but i don't mind it). i won't blurt out too much information about this one, though... ^^"

(the ff is also on fanfiction .net as well)

the ezekiel ff - finished

the two lilith ffs - active, has slow updates

(edit: i'm so sorry but i forgot to say that the ezekiel fanfic has themes of bullying and s*xual harassment so if you're sensitive with these themes and the depiction of them, then i'd advise you to not read it. the author does leave warnings for their work, though it's best for you to read those first before you get on w/ the ff)

these three ffs are from the same person! the concept of them was really unique in the sense that they'd also include drawings too so it felt like reading a webtoon rather than your typical ff on wattpad

all two (or three in this case) are from the author's vision of what a future season 6 would be like. compared to the canon reimagined episodes, it includes even more mature themes and the kids are now in their late teens!

(the last one is a continuation of the second ff, if you were wondering)

(finished)

this could possibly be the oldest sb ff there is since it's from 2009. this time, it's not based off reimagined, but classic instead (given the fact that reim. didn't officially release its first season until 2011)

(finished)

gizmo, would you stop taking pictures of yourself? your owner's going to jail /ref

(just kidding, giz doesn't actually appear in the fic)

but i'm not joking when i say that chris gets arrested in this ff. there's also a homophobic woman that got chris arrested in the first place and joy gets ptsd yayyy 🎉 /hj

the only part i wasn't keen on was when the two animals came in but that's abt it /spoiler (?)

(there's also two pages, if you're wondering)

(unfinished)

this one was pretty great too! you'd probably realise that most of the fics regarding the kids also age them up to be teenagers

the ff is a continuation of the actual series, but the kids are now in high school and basically, chris gets withdrawal symptoms bc joy moved to another state

(the reason why i started this on the 2nd chapter is bc that's when the fanfiction actually starts)

(finished)

as you might've noticed, the ff is in russian. you might have to turn on translate so you get a rough understanding of what's going on

basically chris and joy are now celestial beings and they take care of these two children who they've known through the children's parents

#(i'm so sorry that most of these are just joris fanfics 😭)#(they're pretty much the only good ones so you're gonna have to bear with that)

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wonjinburger · 1 year ago

Text

writing prompt #04

bumping into each other as solo travelers ; park sunghoon

태양보다 찬란한 . . . 그게 바로 나

INFO : : park sunghoon x reader / romcom

wc : <1600

notes : this was lowkey rushed bcs i had an idea at 12am but i had to go sleep but i couldn't risk losing the idea

20 JANUARY 2023 : :

2:04 - it's currently 2am and i've just landed in paris, and i'm now heading to my hotel room to take a long ass nap.

13:12 - jk the nap lasted from around 11 hours. now it's 1pm and i'm going to go out for lunch. i've heard a lot of good word about a specific cafe so i'm gonna go try it out!

13:37 - the weirdest things just happened what the fuck? i bumped into this guy, who was really hot btw, by accident. obviously i apologized for it like a normal person but he just scoffed at me and left?? thanks for that random stranger.

23 JANUARY 2023 : :

12:02 - i just had a quick snack and i'm currently on the train to versailles, i wanted to have a quick look at all the beautiful architecture. i find versailles to be such a romantic and beautiful place lol

12:28 - i've arrived at versailles! i have a tour booked for today at 1pm, so i guess i'll walk around versailles for now.

13:13 - no fucking way, the guy i bumped into a few days ago is here too, like, in the same tour group as me. i said hi and he basically looked at me weird and left me standing. thank god idk this guy and i'll never see him again, he seems like an ass.

14 APRIL 2023 : :

10:16 - hi journal, today i'm in the netherlands, i heard about the keukenhof tulip garden and of course i had to come here. i just had breakfast at the hotel i'm staying in and i'm about to head out to the garden to see all the pretty flowers!

11:11 - THE GARDEN IS SO PRETTY OMG BUT THAT EXPERIENCE WAS LOWKEY RUINED. by who you may ask? by FUCKING FRANCE DUDE?? WHY IS HE EVERYWHERE???? like i was taking photos of the pretty flowers and boom, suddenly i see him through the lens of my camera, please get this guy out of my life

11 MAY 2023 : :

00:01 - i have finally done one of the things off my bucket list, and that is to visit switzerland! i always saw tiktoks and photos of the amazing view and obviously i had to come see for myself, but it's 12am rn and i am really tired so i'm gonna go sleep, then i'll explore in the morning

11:42 - okay i woke up a few minutes ago which is quite late, but i'm gonna go down to the hotel's cafeteria and have some brunch before i explore the town

4:51 - hi this isn't funny anymore, i literally just set foot into an eatery near one of the places i was visiting and i see france dude, AGAIN. can he just get out of my life atp please, i'm so sick of seeing his annoying (but ig good-looking) face. AND WHY IS THE ONLY AVAILABLE SEAT LIKE NEXT TO HIS TABLE???

-- (☆)

i'm going back home to korea today, i think i've been travelling way too much, so i'm going to go home and rest up and spend time with my family and some friends.

i boarded the plane and by that point it was 11pm and i was honestly drained. i spent a whole day exploring the more nature-y side of switzerland and the view definitely did not disappoint.

i sat myself down in my assigned seat and was so ready to fall asleep at this point. a guy walked over and sat next to me, and i bet you won't be able to figure out who was gonna be my plane seatmate for almost 12 hours. yeah it was france guy. he seemed pretty surprised to see me too i think.

after he sat himself down next to me, he looked at me, maybe i was staring too hard.. "hey" i looked at him, question marks practically all over my forehead. "can you stop staring at me" i scoffed at him, this guy is ridiculous!

the plane took off a few minutes later and i was starting to doze off, and unfortunately for me i left my neck pillow in my luggage by accident, so my head was dropping left and right.

i suddenly woke up and it felt like i was lying against something? i sat upright to see what i had been sleeping on, and it was france dude? he woke up when he felt me getting up. "you're finally up, my shoulder feels like it's about to dislocate"

'okay sorry for accidentally sleeping on your shoulder but like, rude much'

"oh shit, i'm so sorry. i left my neck pillow in my luggage and i think i just passed out suddenly" he scoffed and i was so close to losing my shit not gonna lie. but the next moment, he handed me his neck pillow and i looked at him while holding the neck pillow. "just use it, i'd rather you use my stuff than you use me" damn okay stranger. "oh, thanks?" and soon he attempted to go back to sleep.

it was currently 8:59am, which meant we still had probably less than 2 hours left of this plane ride, and i was thanking heavens because 12 hours next to this guy would've been hell if i weren't fast asleep.

france guy was moving around in his seat and i assumed he couldn't fall back asleep. i tapped on his shoulders a little to get his attention "hey, you can have your neck pillow back, seems like you can't sleep, and i'm pretty energized right now" he looked at me and sighed "it's fine, i'll just give up on going back to sleep".

after that it was pure silence. and i couldn't stand it so of course i had to open my big ass mouth.

"so.. you travel a lot?" he nodded his gaze fixed on his phone. "alone?" he nodded again still focusing on his screen. damn talking to this guy is so hard. let's bring up the past! "you remember the first time we met?" he finally looked at me. "we've met?" are you fucking serious right now.

"i bumped into you on accident in paris back in january?" he thought about it for a second before replying. "oh! i remember now, you bumped into me and almost spilt your hot coffee all over me" "hey! it almost spilt on me too okay, and i apologized for it" he shrugged it off and went back on his phone.

"you know, i kept seeing you around while i was travelling and at some point i thought you were stalking me" he looked back at me again, his eyebrows furrowed this time. "what the fuck why would i stalk you, i don't even know you?" "it happens sometimes" "hey, for all i know you could be the one stalking me right now" i was taken aback, speechless, i can't handle this guy oh my god.

"you know, your looks and personality clash a lot" he gave me a look that said 'wtf do you mean'. "you're a good-looking guy, like, i'd definitely date you if your personality was nicer" he stared at me for a while and chuckled a little. "for your information i have a great personality" "it sure doesn't seem that way" he scoffed and put his phone down before looking me in the eyes.

"i'm nice to people i'm close to, last i checked, we don't even know each other." "maybe we can change that" he looked shocked by what i said. honestly i'm shocked too, but i mean, he's pretty hot, it would be a wasted chance.

"you want us to get close?" i nodded. "you're ridiculous lady" i rested my head in the palm of my hands as i kept eye contact with him "it's y/n, lee y/n. and you are?" he looked at me in disbelief for a while. "i can't believe this is happening." he let out a deep and heavy sigh before introducing himself. "i'm park sunghoon."

"nice to meet you sunghoon. oh, i was gonna ask if you were korean, but your name just confirmed it for me" "are you heading home right now?" i nodded to his question. "homesick?" he asked, and i nodded. it seemed like he was feeling homesick too. "maybe we should hangout sometime while we're in korea" i blurted out suddenly, to my surprise he didn't oppose of this idea.

i then pushed my phone towards him, "can i have your number then?" he looked at my phone, then at me. "are you hitting on me?" i don't know, was i? i mean, i am interested in him, so i guess? "yeah i am, so what do you say, can i have your number? and maybe we can go out sometime and maybe even travel together?" he stared at me in shock, but his reply lowkey shocked me too.

"sure, let's go on a date soon"

#enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen scenarios #enhypen hurt/comfort #enhypen sunghoon #sunghoon #park sunghoon #sunghoon imagines #sunghoon scenarios #sunghoon x reader #wonjinburger writes

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notm1keyy · 2 years ago

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OOOH i love your tmnt new origins au!!! tho i’ve got a few questions:

1. what are their markings?? are they natural or like tattoos of sorts (thinking the latter bc the hamato symbol on leo’s shell would be pretty weird other wise)

2. who’s is leo’s rival?? i cannot tell! are they an original character or an old tmnt character?

3. WHO IS DONNIE’S ALIEN FRIEND??? she looks super interesting and pretty. like how did they meet in the first place? does april know? (this is most definitely spoilers but she was the most intriguing)

4. their ages are super interesting!! so does donnie have that oldest child syndrome? and how old were they when they were abandoned?

5. the obviously most totally important question of them all /s: DOES IRMA KNOW ABOUT THE TURTLES (i love irma and i’m so glad she’s in ur iteration btw)

uhhhhh yeah super excited! looks super cool!

ACTUALLY CONSUMING ALL OF THESE QUESTIONS AGHHS TY SOSO MUCH IM SO HAPPY UR ENJOYING THE AU?!

1. They’re tattoos! More specifically a form of paint— its why it sort of has that smudged look on their faces :)!! I wanted to represent the bandanas more differently in the AU but still wanted to give them their own color scheme, so that’s where I came up with them just having their designated colors painted onto them (that have lore reasons ofc..)! They all have symbols that represents them!

2. LEO’S RIVAL ISS!! A mystery… dun dun dun… but all will be revealed soon! Hint… they aren’t an oc

3. I can actually reveal who Donnie’s alien friend is! It’s Jhanna!! If you’ve read the mirage comics or have watched the 2003 show, you know who she is… I absolutely loved her character and wish she appeared more, so I had to add her to this AU. As for how Donnie and her met (and if April knows about her), that’s a story for a different time >:3

4. This AU actually takes place pretty recently! So they were abandoned at their current ages; 9-13 years old. I wanted to keep them young because it showed how inadequate they were in being able to protect themselves and how it left Splinter no other choice than to stow his sons away somewhere else because there was no realistic chance of him being able to protect them all by the amount of ninjas after them. Donnie definitely has oldest child syndrome HHEHA he feels like he has to find the solutions for everything. In the turtles eyes, they weren’t abandoned, and whether or not Splinter is alive or not remains a mystery.

5. HAHA OMG IM SO GLAD U NOTICED IT WAS HER!! As of right now— she doesn’t know about the turtles! April has a hard time even convincing herself that the mutant turtles are real… she doesn’t wanna chase away her bestie because of it HEHAHA. But Irma’s helping April not burst into flames of absolute burn-out, we love her.

WOO <3 TYSM AGAIN FOR THESE QUESTIONS IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO ANSWER THEM!

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt new origins #tmntneworigins #tmnt au #tmnt alternate universe #teenage mutant ninja turtle au

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talesofanaudhdnothing · 1 year ago

Text

Introduction

Good morning, it’s 1pm.

I’m a vlogger at heart and hope to keep up with my channel but thought I would try another avenue of connecting? Anyways the point of that was to explain how I got so used to saying good morning to my camera that I would accidently do it at 4 or 5 pm on my way home from work in the video diaries I would make (not even to upload, I just like to talk but only to myself). Eventually I just started to do it on purpose and while i’m sure no one actually cares, I personally find it hilarious so I have claimed it as my thing.

I’m Bee and this is my blog! Could I tell you what I’ll be posting here? No. Basically, this is just a void for me to shout into just like my youtube channel. I like to think I can offer a pretty realistic and relatable perspective on life and that’s why I like to share. Because I like to consume content I can relate to, and I want to be that content for other people. I crave connection into the world I feel like an alien to. I have autism 🎉 !!! I’m not sure if it’s related but honestly, it checks. Before we go any further let me give you the alphabet soup recipe:

Level 1 ASD

Combined ADHD

Generalized anxiety

depression

And probaby cptsd, arfid, dyscalclia ????

Aaaand as of now that’s it but give me another month or so of introspection and observation and i’ll get back to you. It’s weird taking a piece of yourself and focusing so hard to figure out what it is like that. Things I thought were just normal, aren’t. Everyone isn’t having the same thoughts and feelings and emotions as I am. Everyone is not having as tough of a time as me. I’m also hyper-independent… for some reason so that doesn’t really help with ever asking for the support I need. Weird, right?

I was officially DX with audhd on april 4th, 2023 through some place online that I still kinda squint my eyes at. But I got my silly little paper that says i’m autistic so that’s really all I needed. And tbh I could have paid for and had the best ASD evaluator in the world and I’d still be like “ ok but like..are you positive bc?”. Not because I don’t want to be autistic, god no. I was RELIEVED to discover I might be autistic. And I totally respect everyones feelings and they are very valid but I never understood being upset. To me; If you are autistic, you’ve BEEN autistic. Having the words to it isn’t going to make it worse. It doesn’t give you autism to say you’re autistic. But what it does is validate that you aren’t crazy or weird or just an outsider. You aren’t alone and now you know how to help yourself. Why would I be upset to learn that the reason I get so irrationally angry and deeply terrified when someone revs their motor is because I’m autistic and I’m not just being dramatic???

Maybe I just guessed all the right answers. I don’t do XYZ or experience XYZ like other people who are autistic so maybe I’m really not and i’ just weird and destined to never fit anywhere. What if I’m just faking symptoms (not for attention because I keep it private because I’m embarrassed).

But I know it has to be true, deep down and it always has been and always will be. And I just want to share my experiences and my knowledge. I want to help other audhd people like me. So I want to start this blog to talk about myself; Share my experiences, pass along my knowledge, and share the good and the bad. I want people to better understand us because I know I feel chronically misunderstood. And I just wanna have fun man. I have a lot to say when it’s on my terms and I want to say it!

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the-sun-princess · 4 months ago

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Emi Plays Revue Starlight: El Dorado Part 2

well it wouldnt be a seisho 99th class production if they didn't gay the script up a little

masai and amemiya went to the beach for inspo for this scene….if nothing else is said i Am going to imagine they exchanged rings themselves there. amemiya DID mention something about real life experiences, after all

JUNNA HOW DID U GROW UP BY THE OCEAN AND NOT KNOW HOW TO SWIM-

karen gets seasick. junna doesn't

i am realizing i dont actually know Shit about El Dorado besides 'city of gold' and the animated movie which has Nothing to do with this besides one character being named miguel

aww karen's the first person junna's told she's gon go overseas after graduation. hasn't even told nana lmao. promised her to become a brilliant lead actress. and agrees with karen's sentiment that as long as they keep acting, they'll meet again on stage one day

everyone's sayin how perfectly junna is suited to be salvatore and i'm just sitting here grumpily going WHY DIDNT U LET ME PICK MAHIRUUUU havin to play thru at least this route i assume before i can ;; and at worst, having to play thru ALL of them

lmao judy comin in all threatening. mahiru and nana Might? recognize her? Claudine and maya Def do. futaba and kaoruko have 0 idea

lol judy swiped junna n karens cloaks while they off guard tsk tsk.

aw fun kaoruko hoppin in with the english. judy can speak p good japanese (i mean, her va is japanese. but as a character it is a lil surprising. i wonder if hikari taught her)

mahiru n nana checkin on their gfs after the startle

aha hikari told judy about the seisho girls thats fun

this nana expression keeps killin me she looks so disgruntled

kaoruko who Doesnt tick you off from other schools. lalafin?

since when did u start channeling ran bandori masai

guys please you can't go 'oh well she's doing all our hard work with ease' like have u not learned from claudine and maya that the hard work of others is just not easy for u to see

also junna- karen- i thought the beach was a hot minute away from tokyo and ur out here on a whim AGAIN kjsdhf

lol honestly junna stop bein whiny about not bein adequate yell at her karen. and aw. karen feels the same loneliness of junna going off n leaving as she did when hikari did

emotional dipping time

and now physical dipping out time off to a 2 person training camp in the middle of the exchange program kajhdf

snort

also man is it weird to have karen call junna. junna. and not junjun

MASAI WHAT DO U MEAN UR GON RESTART THE ENTIRE PRODUCTION FROM THE GROUND UP AJKHSKJHF I GET THATS WHAT JUNNA N KAREN ARE DOING BUT-

jkdhf wants revenge on karen too for showing up class B on coming up with the new starlight ending

akjhfjhd

so much for their 'april fools' memoirs in starira

yeaaa lets GO b-gumi

this is fun lol i've always liked what we've seen of b-gumi

still not enough mahiru tho

oh they stuck at school bc dorm curfew is past lmao

masai pls its just junna. and karen

guess they're back i was expecting to see them training lol. and it past dorm curfew so. stuck in the school building i guess ksjdhfdjhfkj

OOOOOOOO

love that these two are stickin together all the way hehe.....also yes they absolutely exchanged rings themselves at the beach and no one will tell me differently

oh they also goin hang with mahiru, maya, n futaba even MORE reason for a mahiru route grumble bumble she's the only one of those three in the mainest main role

gay

lol they all settled in for the night in class b sleepin bags n junna n karen were gon tell masai and amemiya what happened during their lil training camp

and karen immediately fell asleep

which sounds like a good place to stop for the night aha i'll find out why maya n junna are going 'ow' later

<<part 1 part 3>>

#emi plays el dorado #revue starlight el dorado

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ninepentz · 7 months ago

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Christina Johnson vanished while walking her dog

Found!! 2 weeks later, updates posted within blog.

What we know so far

As of 03/17/24

27yr old Christina Johnson from houston, tx went for a walk with her dog around 8am on March 6th of this month. She was wearing a backpack and had apparently left her phone at home. She never arrived back that day and no one has heard from her since

Her father says she was having "challenges" at the time and hoped that she was working through them. He also said that she may not be aware of possible danger or dangerous people, so she's very vulnerable. They found her dog max 7 miles away from her home almost a week and 2 days later.

This is very interesting. I have no idea what could of happened, this is a case that I noticed while scrolling on my tiktok fyp. Since it's not being talked about a lot and it's been past a week since she's been gone with no answers, I decided to take a look at her last seen charts. So hopefully we can find out more, let's go.

8am last seen chart above.

So in missing persons cases, when we are dealing with a grown adult we look to the ascendant for details and then we look to the ascendant planet ruler. For Christians case the ascendant ruler is mars, which is in Aquarius in the 11th house. Unfortunately I don't have her date of birth which would make this a more specific reading but for now this is what we have.

Aquarius mars in the 11th:

What this is telling me is that, maybe she got into a very strange unique accident with a possible gang/community or just maybe ended up in an area that's isolated, unpopular, deserted, untypical.. most likely whatever happened, it could be somewhere in the woods or in general just some place where there's no connection to society or other people.

This could also describe friends, it's possible she was meeting a friend with the 11th house here. Maybe even for sex bc mars is a sexual planet.

***Since the update that she's been found, I heard that the area where she was walking during (apparently she was seen 10 miles away on cctv) was known to have heavy crime and gang activity. So people were surprised that she was in that area alone.. as of today April 21st a month later, there still is no information on what happened to her or what she did during the 2 weeks she was missing. It's interesting and strange. Her father was being very unforth coming with any information.

Confirmed cctv footage below. Seen entering/exiting some building

Venus Aquarius in the 11th, conjunct mars:

Very weird to me. It could be that she was maybe looking for a way to make money bc of Venus being here. Money through a friend, or maybe she was going for a walk to a restaurant/store to either spend money or eat. It's possible she was very energetic at this time too with Venus and mars conjunct. Like she was easily stimulated, passionate, assertive. Maybe she was finding security through a friend or something like that.

***What's interesting since the update that she's been found is she was known to go to restaurants like Jack in the box or any place with wifi to use her laptop in, and I knew none of this until today. Apparently she was looking for a job around the time she was missing. So that could be what this making money with venus here was about.

Video below of Christina's father speaking on it, I'm shocked at the accuracy of astrology.

Ascendant in Aries conjunct Chiron:

Maybe she was visibly hurt or very vulnerable looking with chiron aspecting the asc. It's possible either by her appearance or personality you can tell something was amiss.

Sun, Mercury, Neptune all in the 12th house of pisces:

I would be checking water bc there's a stellium in pisces in the 12th. I feel like Christina would of been very sensitive on this day, feeling creative, spiritual, following her own inner compass. Maybe she was somewhat disconnected from her identity and unable to see herself clearly. Maybe she was distracted listening to music, lost in her head/dreamy, even physically detached from reality. Basically ungrounded. So her sight, hearing, sensory all could of been a reason she wasn't aware of her surroundings as much. I also think she could of been very impressionable and lead astray. If someone wanted to they could easily control her, tell her what to do, etc bc pisces + 12th house describes that she would be trusting, adaptable, flowing like water able to take shape of any environment she's in.

There's a reason her dad said she wouldn't be able to recognize danger bc of whatever challenges she was going through. So he was very aware of her mental state, knows something we don't.

Moon conjunct Pluto in Capricorn in the 10th:

Maybe she was trying to be somewhat responsible, productive, goal oriented with these 2 planets both in Capricorn in the 10th. This tells me there's something about status, influence, success, fame, career, public life (10th house things)

Mars square Uranus:

Something very strange happened, like a unpredictable, unique type of accident. Possible shock, car crash/collision, head injury.

Venus square Uranus:

Venus sq Uranus would explain things not going according to plan, being attracted to unique, strange things/people/relationships. It's possible she was avoiding responsibilities. Something confusing must of happened to where she couldn't believe it or understand why, how, what. Unfamiliar events.

Mars square Jupiter:

It's possible if an accident did happen, she ended up very far away from where she was. Like say if she got into a car crash, her body would be very far in a foreign area. Mars is aggression, power, quickness and Jupiter amplifies those qualities. So things are exaggerated, extremely forced, overkill. This could def describe an accident bc mars and Jupiter together describes a situation where there was no care, consideration, patience, things happened too quickly.

Jupiter trine MC:

She may be found soon, somewhere foreign.

***New update is she was found near the university of Houston which is 6 hours away from her home. There's no way she could of walked there on her own or maybe she did but it's highly unlikely. They say that she may have had help and other people were involved.. but jupiter is def higher learning, education, far distances. Crazy how accurate astrology is. Below you can see where she was last seen vs found.

Saturn sextile MC:

It's interesting that this case isn't being talked about enough but I feel like it could be one of those cases that end up teaching us all something in the end. It will provide something useful to law enforcement/public that is long lasting.

Venus semisquare MC:

Maybe law enforcement feels like there's not much cooperation on this case, they may have got a little lazy on this case with Venus in hard aspect to MC. Maybe law enforcement isn't in harmony with the public is what I'm getting from this since Venus is in the 11th house of groups and communities.

I never got to finish this reading but I left up all my interpretations with the new updates I added to them at the bottom. I'm just now barely finding out all this new information a month later, she was found near the end of March. Links for more info below

youtube

I'm so glad she was found. Tbh this case was very weird to me and it didn't make sense. So that's why I stopped bc I didn't want to assume anything happened to her and the information we had at the time was very unclear. Thanks for reading if you got this far :)

**You can find all my forensic astrology blogs in one place by searching and following the hashtag -> #forensicastrology no spaces.

**Link to information about getting a reading from me below.

✨️Nine of Pentacles✨️

#christina johnson #astrology #astrology transits #forensicastrology #criminalastrology #missingperson #zodiac #aquarius #missing persons case #full moon #youtube

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aureutr · 2 years ago

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My Mystery Pain in 2022, by Month

I feel trite being like “it’s been a journey!” but it kinda has.

Quick sum up, I have an acute pain roughly in the area of my right ovary. I used to think it was menstrual cramps because mine were horrible, but once I went on bc it persisted even though I wasn’t having periods anymore. So in roughly August 2021 I started trying to figure out wtf it actually is.

Also, all of this has been very expensive despite the fact that I have very good insurance through my husband’s job (I’m not asking for money, just a note).

2021

Thought it might be endometriosis, but OBGYN thought it was an ovarian cyst. Got ultrasounds, including a trans-vaginal ultrasound. It was not a cyst. OBGYN referred me to a GP.

GP thought it might be a hernia. Got a CT scan. Also had an MRI at some point but I honestly forget when in this span it was. The pain was not a hernia. GP referred me to a surgeon.

Surgeon poked at me and went “that’s probably endometriosis” and referred me back to the OBGYN

January

Had an exploratory laparoscopy to check for endo. They found some! ...on the wrong side. Nothing in the area of the pain that would explain it. Referred back to GP

February

GP referred me to a gastro NP (the wait to see the MD was months and months). She ordered a colonoscopy.

March

Colonoscopy comes back squeaky clean (literally, considering what you have to go through the day before 😂).

April

NP puts me on a couple of medications to see if they work (they don’t). At my request, refers me to a specialty clinic. I’m being vague on purpose, but think Mayo Clinic (it was not the Mayo Clinic)

Drive for hours (one way) to get to specialty clinic. They poke at me and go “umm this isn’t gastro related, go to pain clinic I guess?”

They say there’s not a huge difference between their pain clinic and what I’d find locally, so I ask for a referral I can take to a local place. It didn’t make sense to make the drive every time if I didn’t have to.

May

Check back in with GP. I have to say, I really like my GP. Just because she couldn’t find the answer and kept referring me to other doctors doesn’t mean she wasn’t doing her job. We had a lot of possibilities to eliminate!

Anyway, the pain clinic GP is associated with doesn’t have any appointments until September.

So I find another one!

New pain MD thinks it’s a nerve issue. Meralgia Paresthetica, he says. That covers a lot of possible specifics, but

I ask new pain MD about perhaps a TENS unit, because a friend of mine has one and I was curious as to if it would work for me. He literally screams at me about how it’s not a viable treatment. Sets up an appointment for a nerve block.

On my way out he hands me a printout about the condition so I can learn some more. Printout recommends TENS unit for mitigation.

Day of nerve block is weird af. There are a ton of people there, all patients. It’s run like an assembly line, almost. All of the nurses and assistants are great and kind and helpful. Pain MD is still a weird jerk.

I don’t know what he did, but all the nerve block accomplished was making the pain 100x worse (temporarily). When I mention this, he screams again about how he used imaging to find the nerve so what I was feeling wasn’t possible.

Follow-up was a phone call, during which I insisted my husband be present. Once again, Pain MD screamed at me for asking a question. He tells me that I can mitigate with lidocaine patches, but they probably won’t work so I should let him surgically implant an electrode instead.

I don’t want to do that, and even if it was the only answer I no longer trust Pain MD. Go back to GP and ask for a referral to the pain clinic I have to wait for.

In the meantime, start wearing lidocaine patches. It helps a little bit.

June

Waiting. Husband has knee surgery. It goes well and he heals quickly, and if I’m honest I’m relieved I can give some care back to him for a change. He doesn’t like to let people take care of him but I like to do it.

July

Waiting. But y’know, we can’t have socialized medicine in America because the wait times would be too long! 🙃

August

Still waiting! As a note, the pain is so bad that I regularly had to call out of work (generally half days, I always tried to push through until I couldn’t). I napped constantly, had almost no energy. I can’t use my home office because sitting upright in an office chair makes it worse. Nothing really makes it better other than sleep, but I found ways to prevent it from getting to the worst point.

September

After Pain MD, I now always have Husband go with me to initial doctor appointments so I can use his tall, white, cis dude powers to my advantage.

Fortunately, new Pain MD seems like a good guy and is very attentive. Has me do a pelvic X-ray because it was the only “easy” test that hadn’t been done. He didn’t think that it would be the answer, and was up front about that, but felt like it was due diligence. X-ray found nothing

He prescribes gabapentin, orders me a TENS unit, and puts me in physical therapy. He isn’t convinced physical therapy would help, but insurance will cover it and it’s something to try.

Gabapentin gives near-immediate relief. I drop from a daily 6 or 7 to a daily 2 or 3. It’s like I’m a person again.

Also refers me to a neurologist, whose first available appointment is December 30th.

October

Physical therapist is kind and helpful. Go 2x a week. It’s all individual exercises that aren’t hard on their own, but they add up.

I am still wearing lidocaine patches daily (I start cutting the big ones in half because I don’t like the material of the little ones), taking gabapentin, and regularly using the TENS unit. All together they help a lot, but nothing makes it completely go away.

November

Finish “evaluation period” of physical therapy. Pain has gotten worse since (not as bad as pre-mitigations, but still worse). Physical therapist and I agree that this is not a problem that PT can solve.

Have follow-up with new pain MD (actually with his PA). Gapabentin gets increased, no other changes.

December

Check in with pain PA again. She orders two separate nerve block tests, scheduled for January. They had been hesitant to do this because I had one done, but apparently the original pain MD I saw has a bad reputation. They didn’t dump on him, but professionally agreed when I did. There’s a suspicion that the first one was not done correctly.

Meet with neurologist (again, Husband comes to this first meeting). Mentions that this might possibly be a pinched nerve in my back, despite the core of the pain being in the front. Orders a nerve conduction study, not yet scheduled because insurance has to approve it first. Because American healthcare is hell. And I have good insurance!!

I also got laid off at the beginning of this month. Insurance is through my husband’s job, so fortunately that does not immediately affect my care.

Now

Three tests coming up (two nerve blocks, also nerve conduction study), then we’ll see. If it does turn out to be a pinched nerve in my back it might be fixable with surgery. But there’s a very good chance this is just something I live with and mitigate for the rest of my life. I don’t know yet.

Anyway, it’s kind of hard to feel creative on top of all of this so that’s why fics and art have kind of tapered off as the year wore on. I want to get back into it, but I try not to force hobbies. They should always be fun.

I don’t have a thesis statement to conclude. I wrote this out for me, really. I know this blog is mostly shitposts and fandom stuff, but it’s still a blog. Thanks for reading if you did, I hope you didn’t feel obligated to <3

#real life #tmi #this is mostly for me I guess #but wow it's been a lot

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alliluyevas · 2 years ago

Note

Hi! This might be a little weird but I’m headed to salt lake city in a couple of days bc we have family who temporarily moved out there and we’re spending the holidays with them. I was wondering if you knew any cool sites or anything, bein’ interested in the history that you are?

not weird at all! happy to help! i am planning to visit salt lake city in april with some friends actually so i had already compiled a list of historical sites that i sent to them. here's some of my ideas and commentary:

You are obviously going to want to visit Temple Square. This is sort of the centerpiece of Salt Lake City that everything is built around (the Temple wasn't completed until the 1890s but they broke ground on it pretty much right away and most of the original construction of important buildings was adjacent to that lot, plus 19th century housing sort of radiated out from there. You won't be able to get into the temple at all right now because they're renovating, and if you're not a temple recommend holding Mormon they wouldn't let you in anyway, but it's definitely worth walking around and looking at the architecture anyway, plus a lot of other monuments/sights are right there.

Overview of the stuff in and around Temple Square:

I would also def recommend you check out the Beehive House and the Lion House, Brigham Young's residences off of Temple Square.

The Beehive House was the “official” residence and it is open to the public for tours. The Lion House is a larger building where most of Brigham Young’s wives and children lived (kind of dormitory style). You cannot tour the Lion House but for some reason there is a cafeteria in it now that you can visit. Plus, again, you can check out the outside!

The Tabernacle was built in 1867! If you go there at noon on a Monday-Saturday or 2 pm on a Sunday, you can hear an organ recital. There might also specifically be Christmas-centric music offerings if you're going at this time of the year. The Tabernacle Choir is very very good and there is a great tradition of choral music performance in Mormonism.

Church History Museum. (This is going to be sort of a mix of actual historical artifacts and religious propaganda. I personally find the religious propaganda aspects sociologically interesting and that's part of why I want to go, but YMMV)

Daughters of Utah Pioneers Pioneer Memorial Museum. Lots of cool niche artifacts! And it's not church-run so it'll be a somewhat different take on Utah history.

The rest of this stuff is NOT in the Temple Square vicinity but I think would also be very cool:

There are a lot of historical homes here and sort of a living-history/reenactment focus. (Mormon colonial Williamsburg? LOL). I definitely plan to go here when I visit!

Here's a list of all the replicated or relocated 19th century buildings they have there!

Chase Home Museum of Utah Folk Arts!

Hope you enjoy and I would love a report back on anything you end up seeing as my friends and I are planning our own trip!

#the heritage park is so interesting bc most of the buildings are associated w families ive read about! so it's cool to be like.#i read about the family that lived in this building. and that one. and that one.

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grantwilson · 2 years ago

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🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

(Fight me, Blue)

we've got a full garden in here!

im currently watching dimension 20 ravening war. i think i'm gonna rewatch all of d20 after. i love them very much

im taking a personal day off of work today. i feel a little guilty about it but like, self care is important or whatever. also i am so so sleepytired

when i was like 14, i was very very into les mis. also that's when 8tracks was at is peak. as a result i listened to a bunch of les mis fanmixes. one of them (grantaire-centric) included the song icarus by bastille. i really liked it so i started listening to the band. several months later, suddenly everyone knew pompeii. i was a little annoyed tbh

gerard way, patrick stump, and brendon urie were all born in mid-april. iirc there was a short period where brendon was in his 20s, patrick was in his 30s, and gerard was in his 40s. idk i just find that interesting

succession and barry are both ending very soon. im not ready. i dont like it when things i love end

also good omens and wwdits are coming back pretty soon! that's exciting. my mom also watches them which like. it's kinda weird that she likes the gay vampire sex show but it's fun

i wish i was part of college humor. obviously im not funny/creative enough but i sometimes fantasize about it. is that weird? just imagining being on game changer or d20 or dirty laundry, hanging out with my friends. alas

i play stardew valley on my computer and switch but mainly on my phone. i did talk about this, idk if anyone remembers, but a while ago i lost all my data from the game on my phone. i had a file where i was in year 9 or 10 and i still miss it and my husband sebastian, but it's ok. i'll get back up there in one of my other files

when my sibling and i were younger, we spent a lot of time at our grandparents' house. they had to move a few years ago when our grandpa got sick and needed a smaller place. i miss that house. it was on a lake and there was a forest and a ravine. i still live in the house i grew up in so it's weird having a place that used to be home and now someone else lives there.

when i was like 17ish i was in driver's training. i didn't end up getting the license for a few years tho. anyway at one point the instructor turned on the radio and there was an ad talking about a fob concert which was unplanned i think? like they were on tour and one date got cancelled so they just played at a random casino. and i went! it was the first time i saw them. i was scared bc i had to go through the casino despite being a minor and then the concert was outside and people were smoking and drinking. but also it was incredible and i loved it. i've seen them a few times since and i love them so much

//send me 🌻, if you dare

#thank u faith!!#ask tag #worldsfastestcrouton

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tiptapricot · 2 years ago

Text

I posted 4,841 times in 2022

597 posts created (12%)

4,244 posts reblogged (88%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@mockspector

@pizzee

@faeblesmith

@tiptapricot

@scarabgrant

I tagged 4,097 of my posts in 2022

Only 15% of my posts had no tags

#no id - 2,285 posts

#moon knight - 1,821 posts

#marc spector - 608 posts

#the fruit is talking again - 603 posts

#steven grant - 560 posts

#gif - 326 posts

#jake lockley - 281 posts

#fic - 163 posts

#layla el faouly - 160 posts

#tiger & bunny - 147 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#gunshot audio cut. hugging in the duat. looking through memories. pointing to the temple. it wasn’t your fault. ‘steven!’ ‘marc!’ ‘turn the

My Top Posts in 2022:

Thinkin about Steven fronting after Marc's been out on a mission, and their body is just aching and their knuckles are scraped up and Marc's still kind of there but really tired, and Steven's not sure what happened, but he kisses their hands gently, and goes to the sink to clean up the injuries, and thanks Marc for getting them home safe... "You did good, love."

551 notes - Posted April 23, 2022

Ahem. I present to you all, the best mock up of Steven’s apartment I was able to glean from obsessive screenshots and combs of episodes 1 and 2. It is not exactly to scale bc I was just trying to get stuff down, and if there is a “?” next to something that’s because I couldn’t find a point to see it clearly enough to know it’s placement/what exactly it was, but I think this is pretty good all things considered.

This obvs doesn’t include all the scattered books and shelf knick knacks, or a few things that aren’t 2D, such as Marc’s stashing nook to the right and above Gus’s tank in the kitchen, or the storage loft above Steven’s bed which the wooden supports hold up and the ladder to the left of his bed reaches.

A few fun scene placement moments below cut! (Sorry for weird video format!)

Steven grabs the masking tape from the “tape table?”-ish area when he puts up tape, and regularly tosses the tape into the “tape bin” near Gus’s tank every following morning (the roll is also seen placed somewhere else later but a few things move around and these were the solid points I saw)

See the full post

861 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

This one is so long I’m sorry HDHDHHDB

Thinking about how important Steven has always been to Marc... Cause even before they actually talked to each other Marc did everything he could to try and maintain Steven's sense of normalcy while still completing Khonshu's missions. He always brought them back home and made sure to redo Steven's tape and locks and sand and restraints so that he could feel normal and keep living his life.

He likely went to work for him a few times, or dealt with things at the museum when he fronted by accident (Jake probably did too but neither of them are aware of it). He got Steven a new Gus when the original died while he had to take the unavoidable trip out to the alps for a few days (they couldn't let Harrow get the scarab and it seems like that was when they planned to stop him), and the entire time they were there he was fighting to be the one in front so Steven could stay stay safe and not have to see as much as he did.

It wasn't perfect, none of it was. Steven was struggling and confused and Marc fucked up a lot, but even when they got home and it was unavoidable that Steven would find out he missed two days, Marc still went through the motions in one last effort to keep Steven in a world that was his.

He tells Steven to stop looking because even though things are slipping he still wants to give him that out, that ability to go back into normalcy if he wants to (Marc is begging him to because he doesn't want him part of his world, he was never meant to be), and even after that wall breaks down between them he's always there to save them, and he tells Steven it every time because it's what he's used to, it's what he's always done. He always protects Steven and Steven is always ok.

But now Steven's seen too much and knows too much and he starts lashing out and getting in the way of missions because he's scared and trying so so hard, but he doesn't fully understand his and Marc's situation, and it throws off the balance of everything Marc worked so hard to create for them.

Steven doesn't appreciate that Marc's always tried to keep them safe, to keep Steven away from all of this, he just sees the negatives, and it hammers home all the bad things Marc tries to avoid thinking about himself. After all, what was the point of any of it if Steven just sees him as the villain? And he doesn't even get to process all that that because they're still racing against the clock to stop Harrow, and even though Marc is pissed and falling apart at the seams he still has to make keeping Layla and Steven safe a priority. Even when he's mad, that's still his goal and his job. He buckles down, gets serious, and keeps going.

But the trial and the relationship between Layla and Steven further exacerbate things, because Harrow's words are discombobulating, and the two people he cares about most were never supposed to meet and were never supposed to be in this much danger. These worlds were never supposed to mix, and everything Marc worked for, everything he tried to keep separate and compartmentalized for everyone's good is in chaos, but he can't stop trying.

And then Harrow shoots them, and for the first time in so so long Marc wakes up and Steven isn't there. He calls out to him in the mirror and he isn't there. That's not supposed to happen. He never wanted that. Steven is always supposed to be there, always supposed to be ok, always supposed to be a tether to draw Marc back and keep him focused, to keep him from going off course or going too hard. And so when he's gone, it just snaps everything back into perspective again. Even if he's pissed at him, he needs Steven to be there, to be ok, because otherwise he's failed.

And then they're reunited, and Marc holds on so so tight, and Steven holds him right back, and neither of them want to let go. So Marc doesn't, he goes right back to keeping Steven safe. He goes out into the hall first, has Steven trail behind, tells him to follow him, and it's right back into their normal, because Marc cares and has always cared. So so much.

898 notes - Posted April 21, 2022

Think…. Thinking about how Marc’s last action when he thought he was going to “die” was to press his literal heart into Steven’s hand, like he was ready to be frozen there forever with him and he needed to have him holding that and tHATS WHAT SAVED THEM, THE ACT OF CARING AND CONNECTING AND LOVING SAVED THEM AND I—

968 notes - Posted May 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

A companion piece to this 💖

(ID in ALT)

70,623 notes - Posted September 8, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#added an id to the gif #the fact that sm is just MK #AND THAT I REBLOGGED FROM MYSELF TOO MUCH PLAJEHDHBDBDB #the fruit is talking again

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cielomist · 3 months ago

Text

ok more p5 suou au maruki scenario thoughts. this has become more of a plot outline than just miscellaneous thoughts oops.

takes place after the thieves fail to complete maruki's palace in time, so maruki puts akinari to sleep forever and goes forward with altering reality

to keep the thieves from wondering where akinari is and getting sad about his absence, he basically "writes out" akinari's role from their lives, or otherwise substitutes in akechi when he needs a stand-in

"now they won't be sad that their friend is gone, and akechi-san has friends now, so this is a good and logical and moral solution :)"

(^literally just me trying to keep akechi around despite it all but being stated that akechi is only in the 3rd semester in the first place specifically bc maruki brought him back to life for joker's sake, so really would akechi even be kept around in the Joker's Eternal Sleep scenario)

maruki took extra care with the thieves memories so they wouldn't be able to break out of the dream like they did last time and thus won't try to stop him again

shiho was still in sumaru up until maruki rewrote reality; she was not a part of the infiltration of his palace

(she just kinda got transported back to tokyo with no notice when maruki rewrote reality)

because of this he does not know she also has a persona and metaverse access

jun and tatsuya are immune to his actualization bc philemon already tried modifying their memories and if the Divine Guide of Humanity couldn't make that didn't stick then just a guy trying to play god can't do shit

so it is very incredibly noticeable to them when their son just suddenly drops off the face of the earth

when they go to tokyo, any time they try to inquire about akinari everyone just stares blankly at them, before shaking off their daze and smiling and saying "sorry, what were we talking about?"

except for akechi. akechi sees them, stares for a beat, and then just remembers everything because he is a cynical little man so full of anger (especially at the notion of being trapped in maruki's reality) that the second he is reminded of the name suou (and thus the very noticeable absence of one akinari suou) it all just immediately comes back to him

akechi joins the party and starts explaining The Maruki Shit to the suous

when tatsujun see shiho+ann, shiho recognizes jun bc he was her teacher when she was transferred from shujin, and for half a second she remembers that he was also the father of that transfer student everyone was talking about last april, but then that thought slips from her and she spends the rest of the day feeling like she's forgetting something really important, but whenever she tries to bring it up to ann ann just says "oh its probably nothing!" and carries on like everything's fine

when shiho does finally remember, she tries to get ann to remember as well, but no matter what she does or what she says she can't seem to jog ann's memory

she figures since the suou parents are actively looking for their son and ann can't seem to remember akinari beyond incredibly vague recollections, there must be something going on with him specifically and decides to also try to find out where he is and what happened to him

so everyone ends up at leblanc bc where the hell else do you go to look for akinari suou

wakaba is there!! yayy we love wakaba (futaba is ofc with her and they are having a lovely family time)

anyway jun and tats try to get over wakaba being very visibly no longer deceased and are like HEY SOJIRO WHERE THE HELL IS OUR SON

but same weird brushing off and non answer that they got from all akinari's friends

akechi's like Ok anyway. and just goes upstairs since that's where akinari was living. neither of the isshikis nor sojiro seems to acknowledge the existence of the upstairs and seem to stop perceiving akechi the second he starts going up the stairs

and there is akinari! he is asleep and nothing they do can wake him up, but he is most definitely breathing at least

so jun's like So if we beat this maruki guy my son will wake up. right.

and akechi's like Only one way to find out :)

anyway leblanc attic becomes makeshift hideout bc people affected by maruki's actualization can't seem to perceive it, to keep them away from akinari's comatose body

also it's very convenient to have cognitive psience expert wakaba isshiki just downstairs

speaking of wakaba. while cognitive psience hyperspecific hypotheticals aren't uncommon from the kashihara family (well. one specific kashihara), something about jun's specific inquiry causes her to realize she doesn't actually have solid memories of the last 2 years; she knows she somehow managed to find the perfect work-life balance so she has plenty of time to spend with her daughter while also being completely fulfilled by her work, but she can't seem to grasp anything solid

and then she notices the stairs to the attic and is like Huh. wonder why i forgot those are there.

so she goes upstairs while sojiro and futaba are talking and finds tatsujun+akechi+shiho+comatose akinari

and she's like Hi jun did something happen to me a couple years ago? i realized i don't have real memories of the past two years. and your questions about someone being able to theoretically overwrite reality using the cognition of the collective unconscious made me curious.

and jun's like Uh.

and akechi's internally like UH.

and wakaba's like Jun am i supposed to be dead. if yes what happened to futaba

so the party tries to give wakaba the bullet points of what's happening bc frankly if she knows what's happening she might be able to give even better insight on how to deal with whatever maruki's doing

[akechi sitting silently and awkwardly in the background not making eye contact]

so now wakaba is looped in! she agrees to look after akinari while the party deals w maruki

so then the party makes their way to maruki's palace. when they get there akechi just starts yelling for maruki like Maaaarruuukiiiiii come out we just wanna taaaaaallk :) and maybe cause grevious bodily harm :)))))

maruki appears bc he's like well akechi shouldn't remember that this is all fake. oh who are these other people.

and jun's like Hiii i'm jun suou and this is my husband tatsuya. we were looking for our son. akinari :)

and maruki's like Ah. well.

jun: and we noticed he was comatose. :) so i'd like you to wake him up please :)

maruki: i can't do that, the decision on whether to oppose my perfect reality was causing him a lot of grief so :( i had to put him to sleep so he wouldn't be burdened by that anymore :(

and jun's like this is a pretty sad excuse for a perfect reality when my son that i love more than life itself is COMATOSE.

and maruki gets all preachy about his Vision, and in doing so starts talking to/about shiho and "wouldn't it be better if everything with kamoshida never happened?"

shiho now absolutely frozen in place. maruki keeps talking, making himself bascially sound like a saint for "taking her pain away"

shiho gets fed up and snaps bc he didn't even ASK. her whole life has just been people deciding FOR her, her opinions never mattered, she's just always been expected to choke down and accept what The Adults decide is what's best for her with a smile, from her parents to teachers and coaches and every other fucking person besides ann

so shiho gets to snap at maruki for being no different from anyone else in just deciding to make important life decisions for her without bothering to consult her and then she awakens to her ultimate persona :)

anyway maruki probably fucks off around this point bc he now has four extremely pissed off and powerful persona users at his doorstep and he's like Noooo i'm a pacifist :( and he knows he's not gonna convince them to accept his reality peacefully

#keetext #p5 suou au

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