#bc its the most simple things

[thisdreamplace]

do not forget “yourself”

i think at the end of the day, everyone has come to this is one way or another because of the things we want to experience, to have, to feel and see in our lives, in the world around us. but do not forget “yourself”

the you that is playing the role of [insert your name here lol]

sometimes we are so focused on the outside, and so swamped by the hard emotions that may accompany that

maybe you struggle with anxiety or other mental health issues, maybe youre disappointed with the society in which you live, maybe you really dislike a lot of things about your experience, even hate them

but we forget that within all of this, while focusing so much on how to change the world around us, we could easily change ourselves too using these same methods

imagine yourself without so many anxieties, or see yourself in harmony with your surroundings, etc etc

maybe if youve refused to do this until now, that’s why youre still here

because sometimes we can manage the world to budge, but if you still refuse to, still complaining about the same things or seeing the world in the same painful way, well you’ll never escape that because it lives within you, and thats, of course, the real you

maybe start with yourself for a change, and those more painful feelings you havent been able to shake. stop trying to force in love, when youre still so full of hate. trying to force in abundance, when you cling to scarcity. trying to force in happiness, when youre addicted to melancholy. etc etc

instead, dare to be different. dare to focus on changing YOU, before anything else. who are you being?

if you can still relate to yourself from the past, the you from all these years pasts that youve merely survived and haven’t truly lived, that’s your sign for why youre still stuck

the past you should feel like a ghost, a long ago memory, a past life, another dream

and if doesn’t, if you can still deeply relate to the you who youve tried to escape, thats why youre still here, reading, wondering, and trying.

if youre someone who loves to read about how you dont really need to change, you just need to do this or that thing and it’ll all change for you, and it still hasnt. well… maybe this is your sign to finally do what you’ve avoided.

or continue wondering, waiting, trying…

xo, dream 🦢🫧

[oifaaa]

Realising that my idea of what it means to be in a fandom might be a little skewed so help me out here what is your baseline qualification for being part of a fandom

[mblue-art]

out w these tall clowns 🌲🌸

[dynamitekansai]

THE USOS REUNITE WWE SMACKDOWN (OCTOBER 25, 2024)

[spitblaze]

You ever see something that is meant to be like...an overgeneralized statement for the sake of entertainment or comedy and not at all serious but it's about YOUR special interest and you are just sitting there trying not to explode with an entire explanation of why it's such an overgeneralized statement and the depth of the topic

[skitskatdacat63]

I have a problem.

Further evidence:

[bear-cubs-art-things]

hey just a couple things bc my step-dad really pissed my off yesterday and I need this to he out there:

People mature at different rates

And it's hard for autistic people to mature (quickly) because autism is a cognitive disability

Autism is a cognitive disability

[bonestrouslingbones]

now realizing that i haven't seen an edgepuff fic any longer than a oneshot since fucking. 2022. and not even a oneshot since 2023. god.

[synthetic-sonata]

i just split like 3 tadc alters at once oh my god its joever.

[crimson-nail]

sorry but i will just never understand people who read the ending of trimax as bleak

[donnyclaws]

if demons and grimms are “godless” species then where did they come from?

They were still Created, just not by Auberon and Abaddon. Soft system I'm always tweaking but the ranking goes

- Major gods (Auberon/Abaddon)

- Minor gods (created by fallen scales of major gods)

Then at the bottom is

- Neo gods (Fictional gods & minor gods who lack sapience)

The Godless species, chimera/demons, grimms and werewolves are all created by minor gods but the circumstances are what class them as godless.

Grimms killed their minor God because they are staunchly anti religion and didn't want to fall into blind worship of their mother. Werewolves immmm still figuring out.

And chimera's minor God was never known, it wasn't sapient and wouldn't have been classed as a valid minor God if it was public and not limited to a specific catacomb. Need to tweak all this too but basically it Died and chimera emerged from the earth that they used to live under, horrifying the world ect. They're an extreme outlier in how species normally arrive to the world and speculations on where they came from run rampant, the most popular being the idea of a third major God who is responsible for all corruption in the world ect. Bc they don't have a God they also often create neo religions which is looked down upon.

Pretty much all the setting boils down to is if you have a bragging for existing and if the thing that made you can vouch for it. Chimera, grimm, werewolves and the ocean are considered physically Not part of the world as a whole because they either never had a creator in the worlds eye or have outright rejected the one they did have, or adopted a neo religion which is considered akin to rejecting the physical truth of the world. Ect

I hope that's coherent I'm literlsly about to enter the nap zone

[brltpop]

And speaking of kevin bacon, i read a recent interview of his where he said he wanted to experience living "like normal people do" so he asked a special effects artist to change his appearance to go to a crowded venue and said he absolutely hated the experience because no one recognised him, people pushed him and were rude, no one asked for a photo or gave him a shout out, he had to wait in line to get a simple coffee AND he didn't get any sort of benefit/discount at the venue and legit said he just wanted to go back home to get rid of the disguise and be famous again and like........ the layers of this whole thing 😵‍💫

[waywardsalt]

gotta love how i tend to struggle to get going on a lot of my wips but wrote almost 2000 words worth of just notes for the new bellum x linebeck thing

[garpond]

anyone else w ocd have a thing where its like. you have one or two themes that freak you out the most and can send you into panic attack levels of fear, but then you have a few in the background that always stay at a super chill level despite the fact that you can't get out of the compulsion. like youre not even properly AFRAID you just do the thing Just Cuz because not doing it feels like a reversal of gravity. like the 'mildly thirsty so i take a sip of water' of ocd themes as opposed to the ones that are more like dying of thirst chugging anything u can get your hands on if that makes sense

[noriaki-kak]

Can I hear more about Ava possibly?

HELLO! Sorry for taking truly an eon to reply, around the time you sent the message I was in the middle of moving. Between that and the holidays responding got away from me but I still really wanted to answer! Better late than never I suppose, so without further ado...

So explaining Ava's story requires explaining a good amount of world building. I think Thea has mentioned Demiphics before but the tldr is that they're the children of angels and demons. Heaven and hell have a long history not just with each other but also with Demiphics. Officially, while in the current era relationships between angels and demons are allowed, they're heavily stigmatized and they ARE banned from having children.

As an aside about heaven and hell for context. When I was building this world I knew I wanted it to be an angels and demons/heaven and hell, everything and the kitchen sink sort of setting. But to also kinda look at "Hey a world where people are judged by an arbitrary set of rules and sent to a nice place when they die or a place that sucks would be kinda bad no matter how you slice it."

I wanted to explore a world where heaven and hell are made, not by divine order as a machine that works naturally as intended, but as a concept that multiple institutions are seeking to fulfill. Hell functions as a collection of scattered monarchies, hell wears it's antiquated ideas on it's sleeve. There's the pits of burning hellfire and the society down there is unjust and nightmarish to live in, but demons and the humans cast down there ultimately just have to go about a daily life. It's not fun, it's hard to make a living, but you can still make friends and go to karaoke on the weekend.

Heaven is a very different brand of evil. They hide their ills behind fake pleasantries. They take the lions share of the work when it comes to "judging" humanity (hell is less interested in partaking in heaven's bureaucracy, as long as heaven sends them souls the higher ups are happy to leave the work to them). Heaven and hell are both vast but the first levels you'll see of heaven are seas of clustered office buildings. People's souls are judged by committees of angels, and there's a lot of people thus a lot of committees. A soul hangs in the balance and it's fate can be decided because George the Angel didn't drink enough coffee this morning and just really wants to wrap this up so he can go home.

There is no authority on who's good and bad, there's just rooms full of people arguing with bias and sticking people where they think they should go to meet a quota for the day. Over centuries the guidelines on good and bad actions are constantly being updated and changed, the fates of hundreds of humans are left to the whims of management. There have even been scandals in regards to higher ups pushing for harsher judgement when the budget for processing new souls into heaven gets a little tight.

Thanks to their intent to fulfill a role, humans who make it into heaven are treated fairly well! It's still a living moving society with quite a few problems and not some utopia but your average human is treated to a decent standard of living. This comes with the neglect of their own angels however. They pat themselves on the back for being better than hell, for being a more democratic society, but the angels at the top are largely from well off established families. Working class angels are sort of viewed as disposable.

That's actually a huge problem shared between heaven and hell, demons and angels both are treated as VERY disposable. An attitude largely influenced by the fact that both come into being in wide variety of ways. They can still be born the good old fashioned way but they're just as likely to be born from heaven/hell itself. "I don't have parents, I just popped out of the ground one day as a baby." is not an uncommon story sdfgh.

That brings us to demiphics, I think @dapper-comedy mentioned some of this when talking about Bishop (who will come into the picture again later with Ava hehe) I began writing down all the lore I could off the top of my head about them but then I remembered that I have an entire google doc concerning them! So thankfully I can just share this. (theres a tiny bit of info abt halos at the end which i havent covered BUT yknow more extra fun facts)

ASSUMING the document has been read, I can dive right in with Ava now! Ava ended up under heaven's care as a baby, she lived in the training facility for as long as she could remember and knew absolutely nothing about her birth parents or the circumstances in which she ended up there.

As a young child, the rotating cast of caretakers mean she didn't truly have a constant presence in her life, there were familiar faces but she wasn't allowed to grow truly attached to any of them.

They fed her the propaganda from a young age, telling her how if she's successful and that if she can learn to control her feelings, she can be free and travel not just heaven as an honored solider but see other realms as well.

Very early on she becomes fascinated and obsessed with having wings, demiphics wings manifest as non-physical extensions of their magic. So without her magic, she cannot have wings. It becomes the one thing she truly consciously wants for. The researchers and caretakers notice this and use this to "motivate" her.

Another formative memory for her when she's little, is meeting one of heaven's few success stories. A fully fledged Demiphic solider by the name of Zenith. She's not exactly the warmest and to put it bluntly she speaks like a bloodborne npc (She's got her own whole thing going on sdfghj) but the meeting inspires Ava and cements in her mind that she wants to be a soldier so she can be free and earn her wings.

Her childhood can be described as 1. Monotonous Martial Training and 2. Daily Evil Dark Therapy. She is raised with the intention of having her be able to fully control her feelings constantly. She's not allowed to form emotional connections, she's never allowed to have her own organic feelings.

As you can imagine this creates an intense disconnect between Ava and her own emotions. It's interesting because she's not trained to be emotionless, she's trained to be able to feel any emotion she needs at any moment. She's taught emotions in regards to what kind of magic it corresponds to.

She comes off as very congenial and cheerful because she's also taught about what emotions are expected from her in visible social settings as well.

She lives this deeply lonely, isolated, controlled life until she's 18 years old (or whatever the equivalent in angel/demon years, time moves weird in the different realms)

Around this time a new face enters the picture, an angel by the name of Katrina. Katrina is an angel that works for the government, she used to be a diplomat who traveled to hell but after a year long sabbatical on earth she returned to heaven and transferred to a different position within the government.

Her new position had her visiting the demiphic training facility very frequently and around this time is when she met Ava. When Ava turned eighteen she was given a lot more freedom around the facility. Thanks to her very consistent and good behavior, she was given permissions to move more freely and speak to more people as a sort of test of her training.

Most people passing through that spoke with her were cordial but kept their distance, either out of fear of her or fear of getting in trouble with heaven. Katrina is the first exception, she immediately has a fondness for Ava the first time they speak for a very specific reason. She sees her own child in Ava.

See, when Katrina was a diplomat she spent a lot of time in hell around a lot of important demons. During a party she may have had a one night stand with the ruler of the first layer of hell (He may be the ruler of the first layer aka The City of Dis but he's honestly more of a figurehead that just kinda swings his power around and parties. His many many children and employees do most of the actual work).

And that year long sabbatical she spent on earth afterwards may have had something to do with that. But yeah Katrina had a demiphic child of her own, and being a government worker she was deeply familiar with how her child would be treated in heaven if they knew. So she had her kid in secret and left him at the doorstep of the castle in hell with the hopes he'd have a better life as a prince in hell. (This is a whole entire other character I have named Odd who has a whole ton of other stuff going on but sorry my sweet lad, this aint about you right now asdfgh)

Anywho, Katrina was honestly sort of haunted by this and parts of her regret not trying to find a way to stay with her kid. She had always wanted to raise a kid but life never worked out that way for her. But she was also terrified of being found out and thus having him be taken in by heaven, and so she swallowed that pain and told herself that it was for the best. (She had a small hope that one day she may be able to meet him, and though she never expected he would forgive her or consider her his mother, she bought him a little birthday gift on his birthday every year and stored it away for him just in case.)

When she meets Ava, it's impossible for her heart not to ache, she's around the same age her kid would be. It only takes a few conversations to see how badly heaven messed this kid up. As for Ava, it is instant. Katrina is the first person in her entire life to honestly show even a bit of openness to her. It's like a wildfire, heaven kept the flame burning low but the moment it had any fuel it flared.

It terrified Ava in a way because losing the slightest bit of control of her feelings threatened her future freedom. That plus... it was almost hard for to recognize what she was feeling at all, it was hard for her to even understand what was different or that this was the first person she'd met who considered how she felt when they talked.

It was a kindness she almost couldn't understand, so for a year they consistently crossed paths and spoke. It was rare they had a moment alone to speak, almost always being monitored, but when they did immediately Ava would ask questions she knew she wasn't allowed to and Katrina answered despite the risk.

Katrina is an impulsive person, and she's very aware of this, so she tried her best to not get too invested. She told herself she'd visit and try and be a positive influence on her life but she absolutely couldn't do anything that'd run afoul of heaven......... well she tried sdfgh.

One conversation about six months into knowing each other strikes a real cord. Katrina has realized how hard Ava has bought into heaven's propaganda and Ava's talking about how hard she's working to earn her wings one day.

Katrina is absolutely taken aback by this, because Ava already has wings, they're just sealed away. When Katrina say this, Ava retorts with well yeah, but the only way my magic gets unsealed is by becoming a soldier. And Katrina tells her that other magic user can break that seal, that it's not that heaven will give her wings, it's that they're keeping something that's already hers away from her.

This is a turning point for both of them, this forms a crack in Ava's perception of heaven, and this makes Katrina know she needs to get Ava out of here.

In the following six months, Ava opens up more and starts to question things, starts to struggle with her own feelings and realize she doesn't know who she is. That she doesn't know anything about herself. She feels suddenly lost as her interactions with Katrina makes her realize she hasn't been living as a person. She struggles to find her own preferences, and comes up short, the only things she's ever desired is her ability to fly.

And Katrina makes a plan with her for her escape, promising her that she'll help her fly.

I won't get into the nitty gritty details of the escape plan (mainly because i change my mind of the specifics frequently sdfghj) but around her nineteenth birthday, with the help of Katrina, Ava escapes the facility.

Katrina manages to get away with it despite being questioned because she has a close friend who can secretly harbor Ava.

Avery (another character who has a whole entire in-depth story because I have Too Many Characters and they are all interconnected.) Has a workshop for his art and tinkering on the floating islands of third layer of heaven.

So basically what happens is Katrina shows up to Avery's workshop in the middle of the night with a blanket draped over Ava and goes like "Okay listen, I can explain, you have to promise not to get mad at me." Before revealing Ava and her very obvious horns that stick out like a sore thumb in heaven.

Despite his complaints about the recklessness of the entire situation, he allows her to stay. They eventually get her a pendant to glamour her in her day to day, so she can go around without being immediately spotted.

And with that she joins a little crew of people who hang out with a common goal in heaven! I call them the heist crew bc everyone who hangs out there has a bone to pick with the government in heaven, as well as their own goals. Sometimes that culminates in them stealing objects or information from various government facilities and using it to further their own means. But also it's kinda like that thing where it's like "Oh we're a club that does this!" but ninety percent of the time they just hang out and slack off instead of doing what they're supposed to sdfghj.

I won't go over everyone since this is supposed to be about Ava and this is meant to focus on her but she becomes quite close with a number of people who frequent Avery's workshop!

Avery himself is the first person she latches onto. He has an aloof detached sort of air at first but it very quickly becomes clear how caring an attentive he is. He was once a classically trained artist turn tinkerer and many years ago he suffered an "accident" (it's a long story) that injured the left side of his body greatly, causing him to lose an arm, leg, wing, and eye. With the help of his father long after the event, he crafted himself prosthetics out of marble and gold and enchanted them to move lightly and fluidly.

He can't always wear them, and most of the time he gets around his shop in a wheelchair, but he is particularly attached to the arm he designed and created. So even when he isn't using it, it's never far from him. His current project is even more ambitious, he's attempting to design wings from scratch through a fusion of machining and magic.

Aside from a desire to create a new wing for himself, he believes that any and all denizens of heaven deserve access to flight. Humans, angels who've lost their wings, and even more controversially, demons.

Ava is intimidated by Avery at first because he's difficult to read, but one night she comes across him experiencing rather bad phantom pains and helps bring him his medication. This breaks the ice between them and once he's feeling more himself, he shows her some of the little trinkets he's working on. Clocks and music boxes and stuff like that. Ava finds herself absolutely enraptured and Avery is amused and excited by how truly interested she is.

They talk long into the night and when dawn is barely peeking over the horizon, he gifts her a little music box that he made some time ago before they part ways for the night (day?) . From here they slowly develop a sibling-like relationship and when Avery tells her about his big project attempting to make wings, she's besides herself with excitement.

See, she's free now, she could unseal her magic, but as she discovers who she is as a person, a creeping fear takes hold. She fears she won't be able to control her magic, and that she could accidentally lash out at the first people she's come to care about. So Avery, as well as Katrina, let her know it's perfectly okay for her to take as long as she needs to. Avery assures her that even if it takes her a lifetime to feel comfortable unsealing her magic, he'll be happy to make mechanical wings for her the moment he gets them working.

Speaking of Ava discovering who she is, the second person she becomes close with is Bishop. Bishop is @dapper-comedy's character and I believe they've spoken about them before! Demiphic, escaped from a cult, fought in fighting rings at the heart of the third layers main floating islands. Currently frequenting Avery's shop and struggling to figure out their relationship with their estranged mother, amateur carpenter. (Thea could probably tell you more details about Bishop overall especially since it's been a moment since we discussed these characters and some details are a little foggy on my end sdfghj)

Ava immediately gravitates towards Bishop. They are MUCH more standoffish than anyone else they've met at the workshop, but I don't think anything could stop Ava from wanting to get to know them. Bishop is the first other Demiphic she's met outside of her confinement, and on top of that their magic is unsealed.

Ava has a deep admiration for them, for the way they wield their power. Their friendship is much more of a slow burn, neither really knowing how to approach each other. But Bishop is one of the first people that helps Ava discover more about herself.

She was trained all her life to act a certain way and so her default is a very pleasant bubbly sort of attitude. As she starts to figure out how to be herself however she discovers that at heart she's really much more of a subdued person. She tends towards a quiet, more monotone set of mannerisms. Her friendship with Bishop helps her discover this.

Around people she doesn't know or when she's uncomfortable and out of her element, she adopts her pleasant exterior. Only around people she's really comfortable around does she let it drop, and Bishop is one of the first people that sees that side of her.

The final person she forms a very strong bond with is a familiar face. None other than Giselle! This takes place a VERY long time after everything that happened with the Braithen Kids (+wonky time dilation stuff with the planes), after Giselle died she was sadly the only one who went to heaven dfghj.

I don't recall exactly how Giselle fell in with the heist crew. (I think it had something to do with Bishop's mother, Rose. But I may be misremembering, Thea correct me if I'm wrong dfghj) but! Once she's there she and Ava really hit it off.

Due to often being bedridden in life Giselle is practically cartwheeling through heaven, unrestrained summer fun. Ava immediately befriends her (she meets her after she's gained a bit more confidence interacting with people) and their friendship acts as a vehicle for Ava to catch up to all the mischief she never got to get up to before.

Giselle shares an intense interest in flying as well, and they both are very invested in Avery's mechanical wings project. Frequently asking him about it and planning their own ill advised test flight experiments to help him gather data (which he Did Not ask them to do).

And that's most of the info about Ava! There's small things I could mention. Like how she develops a love of birds spurred on by a little bird necklace Katrina gets for her on a day they decide is her birthday (since she doesn't know the actual date) And how it's the first gift she receives in her entire life, but certainly not the last.

Or how Avery and Katrina take her out to buy clothes for the first time since she really doesn't have much to wear. She struggles making choices for herself, since her clothes were always given to her. Her entire life was light flowing white dresses, embroidered with constellations, and supplied to her directly. She initially picks out similar things, uncertain what else to do. But then she sees a sturdy bomber jacket, and feels a fragile yearning for it.

With Avery and Katrina's encouragement, she gets it for herself. It's the first time she makes a choice for herself based on what she herself really wants. Plus it starts her on a path to discovering she prefers more sturdy androgynous fashion.

There is one more thing, a thread me and Thea haven't quite finished... As time passes and she grows more comfortable with her current life and the people around her, she starts to have strange dreams. Dreams of a garden... and in these dreams she sees someone, and feels as though this someone is calling out to her.

The person she sees looks an awful lot like her, a little bit older... She looks almost like... a sister perhaps? *dramatic musical sting*

BUT YES, she has a demiphic sister named Odette (another character from the Epic Mind of Thea) who begins to reach out to her through her dreams. And through this connection perhaps she'll discover more about the circumstances of her birth and just Who this familiar stranger is. Tune in next time to find out more (when me and Thea actually write more of this story sdfghj)

Aside from that as a little bonus for this taking so long, I scrounged up some Ava art! I haven't drawn her in quite a while so these are kinda ancient but they serve their purpose. Writing this is making we wanna draw her again...

and then these three are a series I did drawing some of the Demiphics! In order from left to right we have Ava -> Bishop -> Odd