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diminished-fish · 4 years

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References for “A Portrait in Synesthesia”

This fic is COMPLETE now, so anyone who might have been hesitant to follow a wip, here you go! The whole synesthetic package, wrapped up with a nice lil bow on top. :3

For those who might have missed the masterpost: the fic was my contribution to the good omens big bang and is a sweeping, canon-compliant romp through history, told in (almost) all original scenes, with lots of nature imagery and T.S. Eliot. Kind of my own cold open, but with way more feelings and flowers. Also the sea. And an emotionally significant comet.

I had the opportunity to throw all of myself at this project and really enjoyed making it an intense focus for a while. In a way, it was an experiment to see how much I was capable of, which as it turns out, is more than I thought! (there’s a lesson here, probably...). Going this deep with the research and worldbuilding is not something I will likely be doing often for fic writing, but since I did with this one, I figured I’d share a bit of the process.

Under the cut are major spoilers for the timeline, story, and historic events in my recent fic, A Portrait in Synesthesia. I had originally planned to post this information in the end notes of the fic, but at some point, the list got way too long and posting it here became the sensible choice. There is a link to this post in the end notes of the fic, so it will be easy to find your way back here if you get to the end and want to know a bit more about the writing and research process.

The Title:

Putting this bit at the top because I don’t know where else to put it: The working title for this fic throughout the entire writing process was “In Synesthesia.” I almost changed the final title in the eleventh hour to “The Still Point of the Turning World” because of what a prevalent theme Eliot became (that line was also slipped into the story three times at important moments — once for each POV character). I also briefly considered “Always, We Were Enough” as a title, since the conversation with Adrielle at the lighthouse kind of... accidentally became the thesis of the whole story, but that was a bit too sappy even for me, a Confirmed Sap.

And while I’ll be questioning my choice of title for the rest of forever (titling things is hard, y’all), I ultimately thought the more descriptive title was best, and wanted to keep the nod to the song that inspired it all.

Speaking of the song... have you listened to it yet?? It’s great, I promise!

youtube

Synesthesia:

This was my research starting point. Before I dug into any of the historical or astronomical research or even started any serious plotting, I started reading about synesthesia, or, as Psychology Today defines it: the neurological condition in which the stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway (for example, hearing) leads to automatic, involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway (such as vision).

Full disclosure: I do not have synesthesia. I spent a LOT of time researching it for this fic and did my best to portray it accurately, in spite of the fantastical elements I added. If I’ve overstepped or gotten something wrong and there are any synesthetes out there who would like to talk about it, I am very open to those discussions. The AO3 comments are always open to that, or you can message me/send me an ask here if you would like a less public forum.

I probably read r/Synesthesia in its entirety, but this thread of first-hand accounts was one of the most interesting to me and provided a lot of the inspiration for how I used the emotional synesthesia imagery.

Besides everyone’s favorite research staring point of Wikipedia, this link is one I got from Boston University’s Synesthesia Project, and it is a pretty exhaustive list of research and books, as well as art and poetry about synesthesia. I have also been working my way through The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat and Other Clinical Tales, by Oliver Sacks which is the book that came most frequently recommended to me in my search. It’s an extremely approachable and interesting look at neurological conditions, synesthesia among them.

As it appears in the fic:

In a broad, generalized sense, Aziraphale and Crowley have a few types of synesthesia in this story. Obviously, I gave it a supernatural/celestial twist and a healthy glug of magical realism, but I did try to keep it firmly rooted in the actual condition. The types of synesthesia they have are:

Chromesthesia: they both have this. Sounds, specifically each other’s voices, have a color association

Lexical-gustatory synesthesia/emotion-flavor synesthesia: Aziraphale has this. Words (in this case, emotions, specifically Crowley’s emotional state) have a taste.

Odor-color synesthesia/emotion-odor synesthesia: Crowley has this. Words (again, emotions, specifically Aziraphale’s emotional state) have a smell.

One of the defining characteristics of synesthesia is that it is constant. If a synesthete connects the number 9 with the color blue, for example, then they will always connect them in this way. This was the major difference between real synesthesia and the fantasy synesthesia in this fic. The sensory/emotion connections for Aziraphale and Crowley changed in subtle ways as their relationship evolved through the ages.

The “binding thread” also had nothing to do with synesthesia. That was me wanting to make the spool analogy work for the body swap, baking it into the entire fic because I liked how the imagery fit with the synesthesia, and then leaning into the magic and the soul memory so hard that I fell flat on my face into magical realism. (A True Fact: I have spent a fair amount of time lying on the floor in the past 6 months, shaking my fist at the cute little plot bunny who grew fangs and claws and dragged me down a rabbit hole that ended up being 100k words deep).

Anyway! Research!

Before I get into space and history and flowers... Yes, I admit to absolutely making up some wacky shit about Europa for the sake of fun banter and making a metaphor work. All those pre-Fall scenes on abandoned Earths are 100% a fantasy setting and I exercised the super fun right of a fantasy writer and embraced the worldbuilding (moonbuilding?). I also just thought Crowley would have delighted in tying a moon’s guts in knots, and Aziraphale would have delighted in the idea of whimsy-for-whimsy’s-sake. Please don’t lose sleep over the scientific inaccuracies.

Halley’s comet:

I promise not to bog this down with a billion comet facts, but there were a few particular things about Halley’s comet that had me gasping dramatically about how it’s “A.J. Crowley, but a comet!!” Specifically, it’s orbit and it’s structure.

Halley’s retrograde orbit gives it one of the fastest velocities (relative to Earth) of any object in the solar system. I never explicitly worked the “you go too fast for me” line into the fic because I was trying to do original scenes (this particular story lived between the lines), but... just know that tidbit is there and join me in these emotional dire straits. If you like.

The comet’s structure is what is known as a “rubble pile”, meaning it’s made up of a bunch of smaller rocks held together by gravity (read: a hot god damn mess held together by stubbornness).

As it appears in the fic:

The nucleus of Halley’s comet is shaped like a weird lopsided peanut. In fact, one could almost look at it and say it resembles a contact binary star, if such a thing could be a shriveled, misshapen pile of rubble.

Officially, Halley’s comet might have been recorded as early as 467 BC (a comet was recorded in Greece that year— unclear if it was Halley’s, but the timing and the fact that it was visible to the naked eye suggests that it probably was). This was the year I had Aziraphale making the scroll that causes Crowley’s panic in Athens (390 BC). I like to think that some human, at some point, caught a glimpse of it and tried to bring it to light, only to be written off as a crazed conspiracy theorist.

The apocalyptic depiction of Halley’s comet in chapter 9 (Bithynia) is actually based in fact. The comet made its closest approach to Earth (in human memory) in 837 AD, passing within 5 million kilometers. Its tail stretched halfway across the sky and it appeared as bright as Venus to the naked eye.

1910 Halley’s Comet panic. Bonus: c o m e t p i l l s

Where 1910′s appearance was a spectacular sight and one of the closest approaches on record (coming within 22 million kilometers of Earth), 1986′s was the worst viewing conditions in 2,000 years. The comet passed within 63 million kilometers at its closest approach, and had the sun positioned between it and Earth, making it impossible to see from areas with any amount of light pollution, and almost invisible to all of the northern hemisphere.

Historic events and settings:

Chapter 6 (Ostia): This was one of the chapters that I did a bunch of arguably unnecessary research for, since the history and the meat of the setting faded into the backdrop as the scene itself focused on dialogue and train of thought. The port town of Ostia was incredibly engrossing to read about, and between wikipedia’s ever-branching paths, ostia-antica.org, and ancient history encyclopedia’s entry, it ended up being one of the deeper rabbit holes I went down. My original intent for Aziraphale being in town was as a response to pirates sacking Ostia in 68 BC. I had him stationed there to guard against further attacks as the town rebuilt, and had him lingering because he was swept away by the romanticism of the art and the sea and the constant ebb & flow of people. I never found a way to work this in that didn’t feel super awkward and expository since the chapter was Crowley POV, so it was just left it as background noise.

Chapter 6 (pyramid of Cestius): Beyond being a magistrate of one of the four great religious corporations in ancient Rome (the Septemviri Epulonum), little is known about who Gaius Cestius actually was. As the city expanded, his lavish tomb was absorbed into the city walls (circa 3rd century AD), where it remains what he is remembered for to this day. I took most of my information from here (cross referenced with our lord and savior, Wikipedia) and had a chuckle at this poem by Thomas Hardy.

Chapter 8 (Plague of Justinian): The Yersinia pestis bacterium leaves no indicator on skeletal remains, meaning we rely on written records to track its path through history. The 6th century plague pandemic is the first recorded outbreak of bubonic plague, and for the purpose of our story, a certain distraught chronicler was the one on site, writing that history.

A note/cw: I wrote chapters 8 and 12 in October and November, respectively, and did much of my research for them over the summer. I imagine, given the current covid-19 pandemic, these sources would be less fun to follow up on now. Please be aware that the podcast episodes linked here, and the book cited in the miscellaneous refs section, get into pretty grisly details about illness and pandemics.

Chapters 8 and 12 (bubonic plague/The Black Death): I took a fair amount of my notes on bubonic/pnuemonic plague, specifically it’s path of destruction through Europe in the 14th century, from the two plague episodes of This Podcast Will Kill You. It’s pretty fascinating stuff and the Erins are great hosts, so check it out if you’re into delightful nerds bantering about epidemiology!

Chapter 9 (the death of Peter of Atroa): Peter of Atroa was an abbot whose fame as a miracle-worker landed him in a scandal accusing him of exorcising demons by the power of Beelzebub, rather than God. Theodore the Studite’s letter cleared his name enough to avoid execution, but his reputation didn’t fully recover until after his death in 837 AD, when he was canonized as a saint. Peter and Theodore were tough to find extensive information on without passing through a paywall, so I took these scraps and ran a mile with them.

Chapter 13 (Tlatelolco, the Aztec Empire, the Feast of the Dead): I used this site as the source and starting point on much of my research on the Aztec Empire. And listen… I know it looks like a website for babies, and yes, I’m aware that a lot of the articles are literally written for a pre-teen audience, but it’s also one of the most concise, thorough, well-researched, and — perhaps most importantly — easily-searchable sources I found. Most of the pages cite papers and archaeological journals and I was able to jump to SO many other great sources of information. Mexicolore has my undying love and devotion for making my research process easy and fun and also having lots of pretty pictures.

Most of the physical descriptions for Tenochtitlan and Tlatelolco (surrounding landscape, canals and causeways, chinampas, etc.) started here.

Tenochtitlan and Tlatelolco were independent cities, but shared a border (kind of like a city and a suburb) and the small island on Lake Texcoco (located where present day Mexico City is). Tenochtitlan was the capital city of the Aztec Empire, and besides cross-referencing Mexicorlore, the link in the previous bullet point, and Wikipedia, I got a fair bit of information from these essays.

Tlatelolco’s market was the major hub of trade and commerce, and saw 20-40,000 people trading PER DAY. Research on the market started here.

Chapter 14 (Terschelling and the Brandaris lighthouse): While I strove for historical accuracy as much as possible in this fic, I did take some liberties— especially with the island of Terschelling and the Brandaris lighthouse (yes, it’s real!) circa 1350-1435.

The village of Brandarius is based on present day West Terschelling— a settlement founded as a direct result of the lighthouse. In the middle ages, both the village and the lighthouse were named after Saint Brandarius (or Brendan of Clonfert: ‘The Navigator’, ‘The Voyager’, ‘The Anchorite’, ‘The Bold’; patron saint of divers, mariners, and travellers). It’s still a relatively small village today, and it was a surprisingly difficult task to find historical records for Brandarius/West Terschelling dating back to the 14th century that say much beyond “it existed.” I loosely based the village off information found here, and named it “Brandarius” instead of “West Terschelling” based on the information found here.

The original lighthouse was built in 1323, destroyed by the sea in 1570, and rebuilt in 1594. Since there were no records (that I could find) of what the original lighthouse looked like, I loosely based the height and floor plan on the current tower, and made up everything everything else about the interior. The interior was based on information about other live-in lighthouses, specifically this one which is roughly the same height as the Brandaris.

The present day Brandaris lighthouse sits directly in the middle of West Terschelling. For the sake of that sweet Self-Imposed Exile + Cryptid Lighthouse Keeper drama, I took the liberty of making my fictional village of Brandarius teeny tiny and setting it slightly apart from the lighthouse.

Miscellaneous references:

In addition to the podcast, details about plague in chapters 8 and 12 were gleaned from the book The Great Mortality by John Kelly. It’s a cool read if you’re into nonfiction that reads like fiction, but does have some rather graphic passages so proceed with caution.

Yaretzi’s maquizcóatl/Aziraphale’s memento. To clarify, they were NOT the same item. I pictured Aziraphale cherishing the memory of the day by the lake with Yaretzi so much, that once he acquired the bookshop and had a place for all his kitsch, he hunted down a bad luck dragon of his own.

Here is the Aztec creation story about sun cycles and Earth’s rebirths that Yaretzi told Aziraphale. Another version of it.

In the scene in Mexico where Aziraphale briefly remembers, I used an analogy about a moment that hovers and flits away as “quick as a hummingbird.” Besides just liking the words, this was a nod to the legend of the cempasuchil flower. I originally had Yaretzi telling Aziraphale that story too, but the chapter was just way too long and something had to go.

In my very first outline, I had Aziraphale’s grief and personal growth chapter taking place at a Día de Muertos festival in Mexico. When the plot and the timeline finally got ironed out and I realized only half of that story was going to take place on Earth, I ended up focusing on Aziraphale’s brief relationship with Yaretzi instead of the festival itself (she was always the important bit). I also found myself married to the idea of that chapter happening in the 14th and 15th centuries, which meant the scenes in Mexico take place before Spain invaded and the festival was based solely on its Aztec roots. Because the plot shifted in this way, a lot of research went on behind the scenes that never made it into the fic, but for anyone interested in the Aztec Feast of the Dead, Mexicolore was my starting place again. From there, I found my way to reading about Mictecacíhuatl, the Aztec goddess of death, who was the main focus of the festival.

This isn’t research, but it might interest, like… three of you, so here you go. The scenes in Heaven (Aziraphale’s solo chapter in general tbh) were hard to write. One of those walls you hit with writing where you kick and punch and bang your head against it for months (literal months, I started wrestling with it in August and it didn’t come together until the end of January) but can’t seem to make any breakthroughs. Inspiration truly comes from unexpected places though, and when @gottagobuycheese sent me this Gregorian chant generator it actually… worked? I cranked that hum slider up to 100 and left it there for a few days (to the chagrin of my spouse) and lo— Zophiel.

There’s a cool legend about Saint Brendan of Clonfert’s sea-faring journey in search of the Garden of Eden that has nothing to do with this fic beyond being neat parallel. If that happens to be anyone’s cup of tea, the story is here. The tl;dr version is here. My original vision for the lighthouse included carved whales (St Brendan’s attribute) over the front door, and images from this story (the island of sheep, the Christmas island, the paradise island of birds) drawn on the walls of one of the bedrooms used by previous keepers’ children. Continuing the theme of “how stories echo” if you will. It felt really awkward and out of place once I wrote it in though, and that chapter was already so long once I got through all the plot bits I wanted, so it was left on the cutting room floor.

Speaking of taking liberties with the 14th century, I did fudge the timing a bit on the art created by Crowley and Adrielle. Drawings, especially pencil sketches, have their historical roots in the late 15th century, and I’m chalking this one up to the fantastical setting of the Good Omens universe. In a fantasy world where angels and demons walk among us and the earth is literally 6,000 years old, I feel like inventing pencils 100 years early is small potatoes. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This is the edition of A Midsummer Night’s Dream that Crowley nicked in Norwich. There are some really wonderful illustrations and scans of full pages under that link. I may or may not have lost a few hours down that research rabbit hole for a few throwaway lines (no regrets, I fall like Crowley).

One last rabbit hole...

I saved this bit for the end of the post since it’s not really research and I don’t know how interested people will be in this kind of thing. Also... this is a lot more emotional and personal than the historical aspects of the fic. This is just what I was feeling and thinking while I was writing, and this story is absolutely the kind of thing I expect everyone to take something different away from. If you read the fic, took your own meaning from it, and want to keep that meaning without me tarnishing it by babbling about symbolism (first of all, high five, I love you, thank you for hanging out with me and my stories), then feel free to skip the rest of this post. <3

But! For anyone who wants to know more about what I had in mind with the flowers and nature metaphors I worked into the story, read on!

The tag “it’s an OT3 where Earth is the third” is something I really worked to pull to center stage. In my mind, Earth was a fully formed character who also spent the pre-Fall storyline being jerked around by God and having its memory wiped. It experienced transformations, pain, heartbreak, joy, and love just like Aziraphale and Crowley did, and I wrote it as falling in love with the two of them over the course of the Earth Project, then remaining very much in love for the entirety of iteration 23 (the current iteration). “Memories that are buried in places deeper than the mind” referred to the soul imprints being formed, but also Earth’s buried memories— seeping through the cracks to connect them via synesthesia in emotionally charged moments, allowing them to find each other from orbit in iterations 20 and 21 (music and the sea), and pulling them together in moments of distress like Constantinople and Barcelona.

In the vein of “Earth as a character,” I used plants (mainly flowers), topography, and weather as Earth’s “voice” in the grief chapters when Crowley and Aziraphale were separated from each other and going through their individual arcs. I’m not sure it technically counts as flower language, since all the flowers featured in the fic were wild and growing in nature, but (almost) all of them served a metaphorical purpose.

Flowers:

Jasmine (for the moon): Aziraphale’s flower. Love, beauty, sensuality, good luck, purity. The rational hedonist.

Marigolds (for the sun): Crowley’s flower. Grief and remembrance of the dead, lost love, the fragility of life, creativity, winning the affections of someone through hard work. The fallen artist.

Purple Hyacinth: Earth’s flower. Regret, sorrow, a desire for forgiveness. The witness. These were the wildflowers that grew in the orchard/vineyard on the penultimate Earth, where Aziraphale and Crowley managed to work out the differences they couldn’t by the sea. Hyacinths are also the hazy images they would see in those moments of vulnerability, compassion, and compromise.

A fun aside! In very early drafts, the placeholder name I was using for angel Crowley was Jacinto, which is a Spanish/Portuguese name meaning “Hyacinth.” It was meant to be a reference to both the flower and the Greek myth of Apollo and Hyacinth, but my brain absolutely could not disconnect it from Manny Jacinto (and kept insisting on imagining Crowley calling Aziraphale homie and calling everything dope). Eventually I leaned into the Latin and landed on Joriel, then attached my banner to the Achilles and Patroclus myth instead of Apollo and Hyacinth, but the name Jacinto still makes me think of starmakers.

Honeysuckle & morning glory, climbing the oak tree: Aziraphale + Crowley + Earth. Seen in chapter 10, when Aziraphale and Crowley shake hands on the Arrangement. Two plants whose vines grow in opposing spirals. In nature, they have a symbiotic relationship, twining around each other in order to climb trees, walls, and fences, allowing both of them to grow higher than they could alone.

Or: local woman sees this tweet, hasn’t known peace since.

The deasilwise / widdershins (clockwise / anticlockwise) thing got sprinkled throughout the story, with deasilwise being the “angel direction” and widdershins being the “demon direction.” Halley’s comet, with its backwards orbit, orbits the sun deasilwise, even after Crowley becomes widdershins.

Amaranth: Immortality, unfading affection, finding beauty in inaccessible places.

The garden in the dunes and Petya’s travelling garden:

Where Aziraphale took a methodical, Kubler-Ross approach to dealing with loss, Crowley’s process was meandering and chaotic. The garden in the dunes was where it all came to a head— his way of throwing all of his emotions on the ground like a big jumbled pile of pick-up sticks, then slowly sorting through them and putting himself back together. There was a whole lot of Earth/flower speech going on in those scenes.

With the exception of zinnias, the garden was made up of perennials or self-sowing flowers. This happened “off-screen” as I could never find a decent way to work it in, but... the zinnias which Crowley bullied into being perennials returned to being annuals and died off after he left Terschelling and sometimes I still cry in the shower about it.

Zinnias: Adrielle’s flower. Endurance, lasting friendship (especially friendships lasting through absence), goodness, daily remembrance. This one is also a small self-indulgence on my part since Adrielle was something of a self-insert. My mother loves zinnias and, growing up, our house was absolutely surrounded by them in the summer. Anywhere there was a free patch of dirt, Mom planted zinnias. They’re a scrappy, weird looking flower that doesn’t have a smell and a lot of people find rather ugly... and I love them with my entire heart. There is no flower on this earth that fills me with more whimsy, nostalgia, or childlike contentment. Also butterflies love them.

Chamomile: Patience. Fresh chamomile flowers are very aromatic and smell like apples.

Daisies: Transformation. Also simplicity, loyalty, and new beginnings.

Poppies: Restful sleep or recovery, peace in death, remembrance.

Tulips: Each tulip color has its own meaning, but the most common thing they symbolize is deep love. That said, I mainly chose this one for their prevalence in the Netherlands, as well as being very colorful perennials.

Pansies: The love or admiration that one person holds for another, free thinking, remembrance.

Lily of the valley: Rebirth, the return of happiness. They also have a very strong, very sweet smell and can grow in cool climates. These were the main reasons I chose it, rather than any of the religious connotations.

Lavender: Silence, devotion, serenity, grace.

Orchids: There’s... actually no deep symbolism with this one. Nothing intended anyway. Orchids, lavender, and cranberries are the dominant native plants on the island of Terschelling. I thought they’d be pretty in the dunes.

I am also a music-must-be-playing-at-all-times kind of person and I came out the other end of this project with FIFTEEN (15) playlists. Some of them are all instrumental playlists that I used to set the mood while I wrote certain scenes/segments, others are lyrical and tell a story or helped me sort out the story, some chapters got entire playlists all to themselves (looking at you, 14th century). The main playlists are linked in the notes on AO3, but I may collect them all in a tumblr post at some point if there’s an interest.

This entire project was an enormous labor of love that took up pretty much all of my free time for six months. So, if you read this far... thank you for coming on such a long journey with me!! Truly, deeply, and from every corner of my heart, thank you for reading. <3

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bleusidemv · 6 years

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85 Question Tag

Thank you @neocultvretechs for tagging me I am always so excited to do stuff like this yeay. Thanks honey!

RULES: answer these 85 statements about yourself and tag 20 people

LAST:

1.drink- strawberry smoothie

2. Phone call- my mom so she can pick me up from the trainstation

3. Text message- friend about the dress for our prom night in 3 weeks

4. Song you listened to- Nirvana-Sam Smith

5. Time you cried- about 2 weeks ago

EVER:

6. Dated someone twice- No

7. Kissed someone and regretted it- YES!!!

8. Been cheated on- I dont really know...I suspect one exboyfriend but I dont care about that anymore and another one kinda did something but not really...just kinda

9. Lost someone special- Nope

10. Been depressed- Haha yeah most of my teenage years but luckyly not anymore

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up- No I have a really high tolerance but I dont drink anyways(only like...maybe...5 times a year for special events)

12. Fave colors- (black white gray) pastel pink/babyblue/mint and dark reds and greens

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends- yeees

16. Fallen out of love- idk maybe its hard to put feelings in situations into such a general statement but I think so

17. Laughed until you cried- definitly. I cry sooo easyly while laughing bc of my huge cheeks being pushed agains my eyes so yeah...thats like the only reason I cry for most of the time

18. Found out someone was talking about you -I dont remember but I dont think so since I dont care about that anyways and it mostly does not happen(at least not knowingly)

19. Met someone who changed you- yes

20. Found out who your friends are- BIG FAT YES. Funny story: one of my best friends from primary school and I started talking again after years of not seeing each other and she is the one that helped me get into kpop so much and now we see each other every other week and bc of her I also got back in touch with another friend who I just went on a 3 day trip to berlin with. So yeah soemtimes the real ones are the ones you have not talked to in a while but that does not make it awkward instead shows you how time does not change a real friendship!

21.kissed someone on your facebooks friends list- I dont have fb so no

GENERAL:

22. How many of your fb friends do you know in real life- Still dont have an account

23. Do you have any pets- Yes one Cat

24. Do you want to change your name- No. I am happy my parents gave me 2 names to choose. One "normal/regular" one (Lea(but no one outside the internet calls me that)) and one that is more special(Sharon(also name I wanna be called by everyone since I like being unique))

25. What did you do for your last birthday- Went out to eat chinese with some friends then into a mexican restaurant to get churros

26. What time did you wake up today- 5:00(my sleep schedual is still shit from last week bc if the train we took at 2 in the morning to get to berlin and waking up early bc of excitement on the day the concert was)

27. What were you doing at midnight last night- trying to fall asleep

28. What is something you cant wait for- in general: when I order something online. Right now: going back to berlin for the BTS concert

30. What are you listening to right now- I.L.Y.-The Rose

31. Have you ever talked to a person named tom- yes I have someone in my art class with that name

32. Something that is getting on your nerves- my constant back pain

33. Most visited webside- either h&m since I have to get a prom dress and I dont want to soend much money on it or kpopmart bc like...I am addicted to buying albums and I cant stop myself

34. Hair color- reddish brown

35. Long or short hair- on myself long. On girls I like both but maybe I prefere short a teenytiny bit more and on boys I like a little longer hair

36. Do you have a crush on someone- like famous people yes of course but in real life not that much. I mean I crush on loaaaad of girls but its not something constant like when you slowly fall in love with someone

37. What do you like about yourself- actually a few things. My eyes, my upperbody proportions, most of my personality and my taste in stuff aaaand my tattoos

38. Want any piercings- not right now. Someday maybe a tongue ring or a nose ring but I had my piercings phase already and I dont want to go back to it for now

39. Blood type- I dont know

40. Nicknames- no constant ones that everyonw uses just random ones with some friends that come up from time to time

41. Relationship status- almost single

42. Zodiac- Pisces

43. Pronouns- she/her

44. Fave TV shows- not watching any right now but maybe sense 8,skins,scubs,my name is earl, stranger things, avatar, sailor moon and sherlock

45. Tattoos- a heart on my foot but there are more coming in the next days

46. Right or left handed- right

47. Ever had surgery- No

48. Piercings- Multiple earlobes, 30mm tunnle(not wearing them anymore tho), I used to have a septum but I also dont wear it anymore and a smiley also not wearing it anymore aaaand I tried to make a nostril piercing myself but I only got halfway through so noooo but maybe one day Ill get that one profesionally done

49. Sport- I used to dance but I ruined my legs with it so I cant do it anymore as a sport thing

50. Vacation- I will hopefully go to greece or portugal this year. And if I could go anywhere Id go to thailand,korea,japan or anywhere that is close to the ocean and has nice beaches

52. Eating- not right now

53. Drinking- mostly water

54. Im about to watch- the last parts of the last ikon tv episode and then maybe the new kq fellaz episodes

55. Waiting for- my sisters weeding in a month

56. Want- to go back to the got7 concert and tell them all the things I need them to know. Also more albums and maybe new shoes

57. Get married- one day yes but not in the close future

58. Career- something creative hopefully in the music industry as a manager or producer would be nice but Ill take anything that makes me happy

WHICH IS BETTER:

59. Hugs or kisses- HUGS

60. Lips or eyes- both but...a slight bit more eyes

61. Shorter or taller- I am a short baby so taller...almost everyone is and I kinda feel cute for being short

62. Older or younger- older

63. Nice arms or stomach- weird question I mean what is the definition of nice? But lets say they mean conventional nice so like toned and muscular...then its definitly arms. I like strong arms. But I think that nice can mean a lot and to me a nice belly is a soft belly to cuddle with

64. Hookup or relationship- depends. Right now definirly hookups but if the right one comes my way I wont say no to a relationship

65. Troublemaker or hesitant- lately more hesitant but I used to be more of a trouble maker

HAVE YOU EVER:

66. Kissed a stranger- No

67. Drank hard liquor- Yeeeees

68. Lost glasses- I dont have glasses so I cant lose them

69. Turned someone down- Uhm yes of course

70. Sex on first date- No...I mean practically I had sex at a first meeting but it was not a date so yeah

71. Broken someone heart- Yup

72. Been arrested- Nope

73. Had your heart broken- No not really

74. Cried when someone died- No

75. Fallen for a friend- Nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

76. Yourself- Sometimes

77. Miracles- Yes...I guess...not sure

78. Love at first sight- I want to but also not sure since Ive not experienced it myself

79. Santa- Nooooooohooooooohooooo

80. Kiss on a first date- thats something to believe in? I just do whatever I feel like

81. Angels- like the church ones no but I do believe that humans can be like angels and thats what I am trying to be

OTHER:

82. Best friends name- I have multiple ones

83. Eye color- Green? Blue? Grey? Who knows

84. Fave movie- too many

85. Fave actor- also too many but the first one that came to my mind was Tom Hardy but there are other in this list too

Tagging : (new mutuals I wanna know better and my good ol frens)

@1kenzo @4xiumn @bobahancafe @felixspotato @woojinshairwasblue @orgel-mp3 @leeknowyaknow @straygayz @jiwonidaeyo @hercosmoscomplex @queen-ki @changbinknows @princess-nakamoto @122c @curledlife @daehdream @irrelevantkblog @neoculture-tech @yummyyugyeommie @joshhaogyu @kinodarling @apricotlipgloss

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no-name-district · 7 years

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Izuku the Indoor Child

Time for more headcanons. Again, most of this is based of MY interpretation of the series, personal experience and personal preference. Please no hate. Ok then, buckle up folks because this is going to be one long ride.

Before I begin with the actual headcanons, let me define what an “indoor child” is. For me, an indoor child is a child that spends most of their time participating in passive activities. For example, reading during break rather than playing tag. As an indoor child, I’ve noticed that its not always a result of introversion. More often than not its an unholy combination of no friends, social awkwardness/anxiety, overprotective/strict/ anxious parents, and an “unconventional” (for lack of a better term) thinking pattern. Which does Izuku have? All of the above. With that out of the way, let us dive into the actual headcanons.

1) Artist!Izuku I draw, and every single tutorial I have watched STRESSES the need to a) draw constantly and b) draw from life. In the manga it’s been confirmed that Izuku is on his thirteenth notebook. Let me reiterate that: he has filled up THIRTEEN notebooks. I know its not 100% drawings, but it still a considerable amount of art. Also let’s take into consideration that ALL of these drawings were based on meticulous observation of real life. In the first episode we saw him jotting down notes and sketches AT THE SCENE meaning that he has some grasp on how to draw quickly, but well enough to capture everything (special moves, the physical appearance of a hero/quirk, impotant details, etc.). Finally, let us never forget that Izuku is a fanboy. He has drawn crappy All Might fanart at some point in his life. Considering his notebooking habits and general idol worship, he probably drew a lot of fan art. Again, as a sort of artist, I can testify that a lot of crappy fan art usually pans out into some decent art. He’s no Picasso, but I firmly believe that he is at least decent in the art department.

2) Bookworm!Izuku Less stuff to go on, but I firmly believe that Izuku is a voracious reader. Obviously he must read comics,detailed reports on heroes, quirk analysis stuff, but I also feel that he would enjoy reading normal YA fiction. Stories about heroism and overcoming adversity appeal to him; he likes submerging himself in a specific topic or notion (escapism through reading y'all). I can also see him liking literature. Izuku loves dissecting things (figuratively speaking), figuring out the logic of something. With literature that is the entire point: finding the core of the piece. Breaking it down bit by bit until you understand. He has an analytical mind and literature is incredibly analytical so I feel it would be something he finds enjoyable. [ Side headcanons: Izuku was totally that kid that would read books on sharks and stuff for fun in elementary. He loves dystopian and fantasy novels (when well written) but will read a good romance novel. Probs that kid that read way ahead of their age group and teachers either loved or hated him for it. Keeps??? snorting??? when they read Shakespeare in class??? and no one knows why??? (It’s because Shakespeare’s works are perverted af and he’s the only one that gets the innuendos)]

3) Tumblr!Izuku He’s a fanboy, so logically, he finds an online fandom. I mentioned it a previous post but I firmly beleieve that there HAS to be something akin to Tumblr (or Twitter) in the bnha universe. Again, let us remember that Izuku is an ostracized, awkward teenager of above average intelligence who is borderline obsessed with a certain fanbase. Sound familiar? Sorry for the sweeping generalization, but Tumblr is known for housing fandoms and introverts and the like. If we also take into account that Izuku is shown with his phone quite a few times (implying that he always has it/ uses it often) and is quite opinionated, its not hard to imagine him engaging online in a Tumblr-esque manner. (Real talk tho, the Hero Discourse™ is REAL in Bnha universe) [Side headcanons: His blog is a Grade A source oh hero meta. Into social justice blogs surprisingly (wants to be informed of prejudices/ issues that people face as to not be an ass and bc he wants to help people). Blog is a Mess™, but it works because Izuku is a Mess™. Stays up late to chat with international mutuals. Many of those nights were spent crying over heroes and how cool they are. Never really talked anout Endeavor but know half of his “anti-” tag is pure Salt™ about Endeavor and none of his followers know why (lol). Keeps his blog a secret because a) hero worship, b)his nsfw tag (no porn, just really nice art, sex ed,etc.). Quality Memes.]

That’s all I can think of at the moment but there will probably be a lot nore Izuku stuff so enjoy

#midoriya izuku #mha #my hero academia #bnha #boku no hero academia #my son

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eggzy · 7 years

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I’m honestly just dying to write somethingggg -- I’d really love a mumu?? maybe just two of us or throw in another person?? it could be anything from apartment wing, college roommates... maybe the truman show???? or something supernatural maybe???

under the cut are the characters/faces in the mumu I’d be interested in playing.

IVAN BISHOP | janis ancens | 22-26 years old

his family has had money for decades bc they’ve always managed to deal with corrupt government officials and whatnot. the bishop family make profit off war/violence bc they sell weapons!! they tend to sell to both sides of wars, even if in secret!! plus, they deal with monster/creature hunters!!! bishop is a name known around the world for many things.

um he’s a perfectionist. has to be the best at everything. everything. he was head boy in the private boarding school he attended, president of whatever fraternity that rich young men like him get into the kind with bad hazing and shit, was president of his university’s SGA, has perfect grades and a perfect record!!! he strives to be the best and ambition has taken him far. he doesn’t just rely on his family but the name does open A LOT of doors for him

he’s very stoic but can charm the pants off people!! but he’s very manipulative in this, can often get people to do what he wants. he once had his whole fraternity turn against this kid on campus who was running against him for SGA… he’s got a real cruel streak. hope you never see it. ://

he’s like ALLLLMOST greysexual but he still likes the act of sex from time to time. its hard to catch him with his guard down. doesn’t have a good relationship with either of his parents. mother cheats while away at one of their many beach condos. father is absent, busy with work && hunting. he’s good at gaslighting ivan so, as you can imagine, the boy has some real daddy issues.

he has younger brother and sister who are twins!! his mother is a BICTH!!! she is not nice. not pleasant in the slightest!! but she’s really really good at hunting! maybe a witch??? haven’t decided where I want that to go lol

MALLORY LEWIS | nicola peltz | 21-23 years old

so mal is an only child and her young parents were very excited to have a girl, especially her mother. she was pretty much a tiny doll in her mother’s eyes. she was an only child and the woman saw her daughter as something to dress up and parade around rather than really take care of. so, unsurprisingly, she’s been to a decent amount of pageants, a few Ws under her belt, in fact.

her parents got divorced when she was three! the highschool sweethearts didn’t last but five years! and so she was never really close with her father because her mother monopolized her time. she grew pretty resentful towards him as she got older because of their lack of time together and because he never really tried to see her or get her away from her mother. after a while, her father didn’t even try to stay in touch. he helped a bit with expenses for a time but once he was remarried, there was no hearing from him.

mal was primarily raised by her mother who jumped from boyfriend to boyfriend and husband to husband!! when she was especially young, there were a lot of boundary lines that were blurred between her and her mother. she slept in bed with her until she was nine, she wouldn’t ever be far from her. her mother would get them matching outfits and she’d always do mal’s hair, make sure she was perfect, and she had to be exactly the way that her mother wanted her to be. no questions.

so being left alone with her mother and being groomed by her mother alone, she kind of became a mini version of her!! she didn’t care about anything other than getting what she wanted. men were tools. they were just bank accounts and pretty things to surround herself with. if she wanted it, she could get it – she knew what her appearance did to others, men especially. ever so manipulative, she has her own harem of men, ages all varying from twenties to sixties, that she spends her time with. she’s easily a homewrecker to a handful of relationships out there.

she relies on some of her daddies forreal though because between them and hustling, she can only resort to criminal acts to support herself!

the monsters she seen all her life!! she used to be very vocal about it but her mom put her in a institution one summer when she was 13 which really traumatized her so she does NOT talk about the shit she sees! NOT CRAZY!!

“GK” STARR | madison mclaughlin | 19-23 years old

my baby is like the human form of peach tea. is that weird to say? gk is a super sweetheart and most people genuinely like her when they meet her. she makes it easy, bc she’s bit of a pushover and people-pleaser so she gets walked on a lot. still learning how to stand up for herself!!

she’s an art freak. loves oil painting the most as that’s the one she’s more experienced with. learning how to use water colors and gouache just as well. wants to be graphic designer one day!!

with a short and small stature, most underestimate her, if not all who cencounter her. she is no impressive figure, by any means, so her goal of becoming a superhero seems farfetched to many. with the appearance of such fragility, gk attracts those who wish to protect without meaning to, often due to her size. her skin is very tanned with a decently clear complexion as she still struggles with acne and such. freckles are scattered across the bridge of her nose and over the tips of her shoulders. A dark mole is one of her most striking features, location just under her right eye.

gk is very friendly and very loud. so basically, one of those people who just makes themselves known, no matter the room they enter into. very much a people-person, loves to be in the company of anyone, even strangers. she’s extremely naive, so constantly people are using her for her powers, abusing her kindness and willingness to help. questions are constantly on her tongue, because she doesn’t know about anything and is so very curious! she’s not everyone’s cup of tea, that’s for sure – but she’ll never know unless you tell her upfront, she’s a bit oblivious at times.

gk stands for georgia katherine, so as you can imagine she’s pretty southern. her accent is thick like molasses!! her family moved here from louisiana about five years ago. it had been a tough move and she struggled for a bit, bc people aren’t always kind and the starrs aren’t necessarily well off. they’re barely pushing by, one might say.

TRENTON LEROY | chris wood | 20-25 years old

tw: child abuse, violence, mental illness

so like!! trenton is from lyon, france! he has a SLIGHT accent but its not strong anymore because he hasn’t been back to france in like ten years.

his mother and father are not married. he was born out of wedlock because his mother was his father’s mistress. the man left after the idea of trenton was even mentioned. he was a married man with hands in politics, he couldn’t afford to have this out.

so labeaux family paid off the leroy family, sending money every month to keep them quiet.

the leroy family is kind of a TRASHY family living in the countryside near lyon. it was just trenton, his mother, grandmother and uncle. a small family that lived on the checks sent by a man worlds away.

he adored his mother more than any person!! like almost an obsession!! but thats because out of that house, she was the only one to ever show him kindness. his grandmother and uncle both were quite unkind to him, blaming him for their misfortunes and taking out their stress. unfortunately, his mother left the family and ran off with a boyfriend. trenton was only seven at the time but the sense of loneliness and abandonment following her departure REALLY affected him in ways that weren’t good. and the abuse he took from other family members only pushed him further.

his father took an interest back into his life at age twelve, realizing that the boy was his only current heir. he quickly took the boy from that house and placed him into a boarding school in england to learn everything from ENGLISH itself to business and other ways of the world.

the setting wasn’t much better tbh!! he was mistreated by older kids for a while, bullied for a variety of things until he finally shot up between age 15 & 16. he really grew into his awkward limbs, a charming face to match!! it was a surprise to everyone that the awkward boy had transformed into that. trenton started to get attention he had never received before. and it delighted him. but he didn’t know how to handle it.

he began abusing his friends, girlfriends… anyone who was close to him. violence was the ONLY language he would ever be fluent in – his family made sure of that.

when he graduated, he was a shadow of the boy he once was. dark and twisted with desires that no good person should have. but still he passed it off like a charm, being the perfect son that his father had never wanted.

trenton was moved to highland springs and he lived there with his just father for a few years, learning the ways of the family business and politics.

but eventually everything got to him and he SNAPPED. the incident had him sent away once more but this time to a mental institution on the west coast. he was heavily guarded secret so no one really knew where he disappeared to. his father only claimed traveling the world.

FOX KINSLEY | matt hitt | 19-22 years old

ALCOHOLISM TW, DRUGS TW

okay so this is atticus fawkes kinsley!! he goes by fox because he hates those names and he’s bitter af towards his family right now.

his dad lost his dream job when fox was about ten or so and he took to the bottle and stayed with it. he wasn’t abusive or anything, just yelled sometimes. Mostly laid around the house, sulking. he’s attempted other jobs, but it always ends up with him fired because of a DUI or something. so that’s where fox got most of his lazy traits from

his mom is this SUPER ambitious woman who’s really great honestly but she really cares about how people view her. so witnessing her husband in the state he was in really embarrassed her?? that destroyed their relationship. she thinks pretty lowly of the man. they fought A LOT. after the man’s fourth DUI in two years, she left.

she tried to convince fox to come with her, but he refused. he didn’t like the idea of abandoning his father. they used to be really close once. :’) so she left seventeen year old fox as well and took his sister to live with her parents for a while.

fox and his father did okay for a year or so. it was a bit rough because he had to get a shitty job with shitty hours to handle the bills and stuff. because good ole dad was still just doing his thing, drinking himself silly and sleeping at the oddest hours. fox had to leave on his last year of high school, which at the time didn’t bother him. but now, he’s starting to regret that more and more.

he’s a stoner through and through. mostly just sticks to weed. he’s really sloping down that path towards harder drugs though so he wears long sleeves occasionally to cover track marks.

things started to get really shitty one late saturday night when he returned after a double at work to find the house empty. only a note from his father, detailing that he needed to find himself and work out his problems on his own, was left. it fucked him up.

the loneliness and desperation he’ll never forget. it’s been carved into his bones and burned into his skin. he’ll never forget that pain. and because of that, he’s very very bitter. he’s been going out and partying doing every drug you can imagine. trying to destroy himself for the past year. sick, unhealthy living.

he’s still working at the gas station, still manning the slushie machines even if he has no one to go home to. no one to teach him how to be an adult in the real world.

WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR:

maybe like more family members? mother/father... sister/brother??? rival family?? maybe some kind of sentient monster???? or like friends of either mal or ivan??

platonic to romantic relationships!

a partner that can put up with me and my work/lazy schedule! I’ve been dying to write and rps are just dwindling around here so they’re just not gonna cut it... but I’m determined to have this plot because I NEEEED the creative outlet.

#1x1 #1x1 rp #mumu rp #mumu plot #mumu roleplay #1x1 plot

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eggzy · 7 years

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under the cut are the characters/faces in the mumu I’d be interested in playing.

IVAN BISHOP | janis ancens | 22-26 years old

MALLORY LEWIS | nicola peltz | 21-23 years old

she relies on some of her daddies forreal though because between them and hustling, she can only resort to criminal acts to support herself!

“GK” STARR | madison mclaughlin | 19-23 years old

she’s an art freak. loves oil painting the most as that’s the one she’s more experienced with. learning how to use water colors and gouache just as well. wants to be graphic designer one day!!

TRENTON LEROY | chris wood | 20-25 years old

tw: child abuse, violence, mental illness

so like!! trenton is from lyon, france! he has a SLIGHT accent but its not strong anymore because he hasn’t been back to france in like ten years.

so labeaux family paid off the leroy family, sending money every month to keep them quiet.

he began abusing his friends, girlfriends… anyone who was close to him. violence was the ONLY language he would ever be fluent in – his family made sure of that.

trenton was moved to highland springs and he lived there with his just father for a few years, learning the ways of the family business and politics.

FOX KINSLEY | matt hitt | 19-22 years old

ALCOHOLISM TW, DRUGS TW

okay so this is atticus fawkes kinsley!! he goes by fox because he hates those names and he’s bitter af towards his family right now.

he’s a stoner through and through. mostly just sticks to weed. he’s really sloping down that path towards harder drugs though so he wears long sleeves occasionally to cover track marks.

he’s still working at the gas station, still manning the slushie machines even if he has no one to go home to. no one to teach him how to be an adult in the real world.

WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR:

maybe like more family members? mother/father... sister/brother??? rival family?? maybe some kind of sentient monster???? or like friends of either mal or ivan??

platonic to romantic relationships!

#mumu rp #mumu roleplay #1x1 rp #1x1 roleplay

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