#bc i have ocs with DID who actually HAVE DID. how DID is presented in moon knight is a bit more fantastical

[swordmaid]

having shri’iia thoughts as one does bc GUESS who’s save file completely died when the new patch came out nooo we have to replay her again 🤭 alas. just stewing on the thought of how she never got to fuck her Mistress even though she wanted to…!!!! like she was out there getting psychologically tortured and mind broken but she was just like WHY won’t you fuck me im literally doing everything for you. which is so bad for her, woman who already has an excruciatingly low self worth because she missed the mark on the standard for lolth’s children (and that’s worse than not fitting in the standard at all) by something out of her own control btw (not being born in a noble house) but she’s been recognised and blessed by her goddess, and she’s been invited to join a drow house so everything should be good right?? she should be desirable right?? finally everything is correct and well and good and the way it should be right????? but no..!! it’s not..!! and so she’s doing everything for this woman, no dignity left, literally doing anything to get her approval, to be told that she’s finally enough, and she’s finally fitting in - and she gets it sometimes, she gets ignored most times tbh and it’s just this painful excruciating stew of self loathing and insecurity that she’s in, and she’s in there for a century but the thing is she can’t even give up. it’s not in her nature to. and she’s done too much to just give up , and she’s been doing this for a long time that she can’t give up and lolth didn’t raise no quitters so she sticks by it, trying to achieve that hopeless praise. but then one day she gets dropped like nothing, everything she’s done and suffered and worked towards and sacrificed gets thrown out bc her goddess isn’t pleased with her and good luck going home btw you’re not welcome here anymore bc ur pathetic. the rug gets pulled under her feet and she’s left in this strange world that she can barely navigate in let alone speak the language and u expect her to b fine with that…?

[lime1991]

embarrassingly, reading moon knight fanfic gave me an oc idea

[hazbinwhoree]

Okay so I’m violently obsessed w this man and your writings so… can I request something way too self indulgent and specific ? If this is too much feel free to ignore this ask but an Adam x fallen angel!reader who before she fell was his third wife in heaven for like a few hundred years unaware of the exterminations and when she finds out she and Adam argue and it results in her wings being ripped off and her cast to hell… and once in hell she keeps a low profile and her identity a secret. But sees about the hazbin hotel on TV and goes to offer her help to Charlie because even tho she knows she can’t go back to heaven, it’d be nice to help some sinners if possible. Not expecting things to ramp up so much and involve Adam. But like… if the angelic dagger nifty stabbed him with didn’t kill him, say charlie and reader take him into the newly built hotel and reader tries to nurse him back to health and there’s angst bc it’s been 20 years since he basically cast his own wife, his angel to rot in hell??

Sorry if you hate this idea n don’t wanna do it I totally don’t blame you I’m just on Adam brain rot and have a handful of self inserts/ocs to ship a him in different AUs but this is my favorite despite how cheesy it probably is

Twenty Years in Eternity

“What do you mean exterminate them?” (Name) asks, appalled. “Exactly what it fuckin’ sounds like, babe,” Adam laughed. “It’s population control!” “Population control!? It’s murder!” “I don’t know why you’re getting so worked up about this,” Adam scoffed.

“Because not every sinner in Hell deserves to be there!”

Silence. (Name) had just proclaimed blasphemy. Adam’s eyes moved to something behind her and his face dropped. “(Name).” (Name) turned around to find Sera, looking down at her in disapproval. “Such blasphemy is not tolerated in Heaven,” Sera said coldly.

Adam couldn’t do anything as Sera knocked (Name) to the ground, and abruptly tore off her wings. (Name) screamed. Sera opened a portal overlooking Hell, and grabbed (Name). “Adam help!” (Name) cried, struggling. Adam could only stand and watch. Neither of them were any match for Sera, who threw (Name) into the portal and shut it behind her.

And that was the last Adam saw of his wife for twenty years.

In Hell, (Name) found her way as a Fallen, until she heard about the Princess of Hell’s endeavor to rehab sinners to go to Heaven. Intrigued, (Name) made her way to the Hotel one day. She knew Heaven would never accept this plan, but she didn’t want to kill Charlie’s spirits.

(Name) quickly became a permanent fixture of the hotel, befriending the inhabitants. She got particularly close to Angel Dust.

Every year, during the extermination, she would hide, not out of fear for her life, the exorcists didn’t kill the Fallen, but so that she didn’t have to deal with the pain of seeing the angels and run the risk of seeing Adam.

Unbeknownst to her, Adam searched for her during every extermination.

(Name) was shocked when Charlie giddily announced that she had secured a meeting with Heaven. She hadn’t been expecting Heaven to let her get this far.

But further she did not get, coming back from the meeting absolutely fuming.

“What happened?” (Name) asked. “The guy was such a… such a… prick!” “Shot down the hotel idea?” “Adam didn’t even let me finish my presentation. He said Hell is forever whether we like it or not. And he cut the extermination time in half, they’re coming back in six months!”

(Name)’s blood ran cold. “Adam?”

“Yeah, like the first man, Adam. He was such an asshole.”

“Yeah that sounds like him,” (Name) muttered.

Charlie looked at her funny. “Did you know him when you were an angel?”

“Know him? I was married to him.”

Charlie’s jaw dropped. “You’re his third wife!?” (Name) nodded. “Unfortunately.”

“He talked about you,” Charlie said. “It was the only time he actually sounded genuine.” “What did he say?” (Name) couldn’t help her curiosity.

“He said that Hell is forever, and if someone like his wife could end up there with no chance out, sinners were certainly not leaving.”

(Name) hummed. “He sounded kind of sad,” Charlie said. “I think he misses you.” “Yeah, well, it’s been twenty years. He’ll get over it. He sure didn’t do anything to stop me from ending up here. We were fighting over the extermination.”

“That’s what got you sent here?” Charlie asked. (Name) nodded. “I’m sorry,” is all Charlie could say.

Weeks passed and she managed to get another meeting with Heaven, this time going past Adam and straight to the Seraphim. (Name) had no idea how she did it, but knew the results would be the same in the end.

When Charlie and Vaggie came tumbling through the portal, Charlie more upset than (Name) had ever seen her, she knew she had been right.

“He said he’s attacking the hotel first!” Charlie cried, throwing herself into Angel’s arms. “Who, Adam?” (Name) asked, feeling nauseous. “Yes!” “It’s okay, Charlie, we’ll stand our ground and defend the hotel. Remember, angels can die. We just need to get our hands on some angelic metal,” Vaggie soothed.

The next month was spent preparing for battle. (Name) was going to stay out of it, and Charlie understood. (Name) figured there wasn’t much she could contribute anyway. So when the extermination came, she locked herself in her room.

She could hear the battle raging outside, and it sounded like her side was losing. She almost went out to help, until she heard Adam’s sadistic laugh outside her window. She remembered why she wasn’t involving herself. She couldn’t face Adam.

(Name) was content staying put, until she no longer had a choice, the hotel splitting in half. She very nearly got crushed in the rubble, but somehow made it out unharmed. As she lay on the ground catching her breath, she heard a familiar, angry voice. “I started everything on Earth! All of mankind came from these nuts!”

(Name) looked up to see Adam’s back as he screamed at Lucifer and Charlie. She also saw Nifty, running up behind Adam with a knife. “NO!” (Name) cried out, but it was too late. Nifty plunged the blade through Adam’s back. Adam choked, body freezing for a moment before he fell on his stomach.

Nifty raised the blade to keep stabbing him, but (Name) ran over as fast as she could and pushed Nifty off of him.

“No, no no no.” (Name) gently turned Adam onto his back. He opened his eyes, and when he saw her, he smiled. “(Name),” he croaked. His eyes fluttered shut but the soft smile never left his face. “Adam, no, stay with me, please,” (Name) begged. She looked up at Charlie. “Please, help me!”

Adam was the last person Charlie wanted to save, but her belief in mercy and hatred of seeing (Name) so upset won over, and she knelt down beside Adam, putting pressure on his wound. “Dad, there has to be something you can do.”

Lucifer sighed. He walked over and held a hand over the stab wound, concentrating. It began to heal, just enough to stem the bleeding before Lucifer stopped. “There. He won’t bleed out, but he’s lost a lot of blood.”

Adam had fallen unconscious.

Lucifer refocused his efforts on repairing the hotel. When it was back together, Charlie helped (Name) drag Adam inside. They got to (Name)’s room and deposited Adam on her bed. Adam didn’t stir. Charlie left (Name) to have her privacy with him.

When Charlie left, (Name) unzipped and pulled off Adam’s robe, lifting up his shirt underneath to reveal the stab wound. With a wet washcloth she began to clean the wound and blood off his body. When she was done, she grabbed gauze (Charlie left her with a first-aid kit) and wrapped Adam’s torso.

Content, she finally situated him into the bed comfortably, pulling the covers up to his chest. As she knelt next to the bed, stroking Adam’s hair back gently, Adam’s eyes fluttered open. He looked panicked until (Name)’s face came into view.

“(Name).” “Adam.”

(Name) forgot all her previous anger towards Adam and hugged him in relief. “You’re okay,” she cried. Adam looked taken aback before smiling and wrapping his arms around her. “Thanks to you.” “Thanks to Lucifer, really–” “Never say his name in front of me again.”

(Name) blinked. “Right, of course. But he did kind of save your life.” “Only because of you,” Adam retorted. (Name) was silent. He had a point.

The silence consumed them as they stared at one another, waiting for the other to speak. “You abandoned me,” they said at the same time. “What?” “What the fuck do you mean–”

(Name) took a deep breath. “You abandoned me in Heaven, when Sera tore off my fucking wings and threw me down here. You abandoned me as a Fallen. How did I abandon you?”

“You abandoned me by questioning the extermination, and speaking blasphemy. You knew what happened to angels who speak blasphemy. And you still did it. There was nothing I could fucking do. Sera is like, a million times stronger than me. And for the record, I searched for you. Every extermination. I looked for you. You abandoned me, to be alone, again.”

(Name) was silent. She hadn’t realized that was how he felt about the situation.

“I love you, and I fuckin’ miss you. Alright?” Adam confessed. (Name)’s eyes began to well with tears. “I love you and miss you too.” She leaned over him and pressed her lips to his. Adam kissed back with fervor, reaching up to cup her face in one large hand. They fit together like missing puzzle pieces.

Two separated soulmates finally reunited.

[cherrytinz]

Hello, I really like your character and I’m curious do you have any story on your oc if so, I would love to hear it (:

Hello darling! First of all, thank you so much! It really makes me happy that people like my ocs! It really means a lot. Not to mention that I was generally surprised to see that so many liked Lucy's design! thanks yall! I was so happy to read those comments 🖤

And well, yeah! I want to write a fanfic with her so I have a few things planned. Lucy is an old oc frommmm 2019, but I decided to bring her back to life with a redising and all 🦇

Soooooo Lucy Fernby is a British girl who was born in 1975. Her parents are quite famous musical artists (especially her father) so she always had an approach to music. Actually, Lucy has absolute pitch and ease with some instruments, however she prefers to play the bass and write songs to cope with certain emotions that she doesn't know how to share. If I had to assign her a voice, I would say that she speaks like Gwen of Total Drama but with a British accent (although certainly Serena's voice from downtown is still an option lmao) , and when she sings it would sound like Mary Elizabeth McGlynn.

Even so, her parents (Emily, a goth singer and Luke, a rock band guitarist) got divorced when she was still a child. Her father returns to the USA but still tries to be as present in her life as possible. Despite this, due to a situation that Lucy does not want to talk about, they distance themselves when she is 14. I CLARIFY because I know it is very ambiguous, no, her father did not hurt her or anything, only Lucy keeps everything to herself.

Lucy had a lot of problems that affected her way of relating to others, both with people of her age and with her own parents. Due to a series of bad decisions she misses the school year and that's when her mother decides that it is best to send her to live with her father so that she can get away from "the toxic environment she is in."

(conclusion that Emily draws after brief questions that Lucy did not develop when she answering)

This is how Lucy ends up going to live with her father at the Addison Apartments because well, a rock star who lives in a town that no one knows = peace of mind and time which he can dedicate to his daughter and himself!

oh, another fun fact of her! A year before moving to the Addison Apartments, she had a platonic friend/crush named Meri with whom she lost connection. I mention this because Lucy has a tendency to isolate herself when something happens and simply end a relationship instead of fighting for it, which she did at the time with Sally and the rest of the gang, but she has learned to be more open about how she feels.

thanks for asking! just in case, if anyone is interested feel free to ask me anything abt my ocs or even if you want to know my headcanons of Sally Face (in this case bc im in others fandoms like BG3 and Gorillaz) I'm more than happy to share them 💖💖💖

[ozdical]

UM!!! QUESTIONS ABOUT RET!! YOUR OC

does he have a job / does he Like having a job?

how was he made / who was he made by?

whenever i see robots wearing clothes i have to ask: what kind of world does he live in? is this a futuristic robot / human harmony type of situation? is it all robots? a parallel dimension? etc

can ret eat or sleep + how? can ret dream ? what does he dream about, if at all?

answering the third question first bc i wanted to show y'all Ret's full outfit, he likes jus stayin shirtless to avoid overheating, plus in the house he lives in, everyone's a robot so no one bats an eye.

full lore blurb under the cut!

Ret's world is actually within the same world as my object head ocs! same time frame as well, its just that Ret's continent is filled with humans and my object head guys live on another continent, p far away. in-universe, Ret's time frame isnt really that far from us! i'd say around 2046, technology has advanced significantly but not to the 'robots and humans live in harmony' level, but are still very intelligent to operate on their own.

Ret does have a job! hes one of those 'amazing ai makes creative project' robots, think miku if miku wrote her own songs and made her own dance choreography, drew her own posters- etc! Ret, to executives, is a self-sustaining machine that doesnt need a team, which lets him have a lot of creative control over his music videos and add his own 'X-factor' to them thats very eye catching to audiences [its the autism. the autism is the x factor]

if you asked HIM, he would say that he likes having a job, smth to do, a set purpose, but he does wish he could try smth different every once in a while nd it shows in his projects. oddly enough, he communicates his feelings really well in his videos but as soon as he has to verbalize them he tends to lie to appease whoever is asking.

originally, he was a gimmick bot, his gimmick was 'put your data into this machine, and it will write a song about your deepest desires!', just a song-writer ai, what he did as a prototype was as rudementary as psychic hot-reading [or cold-reading if the date input was insufficient], he grew to learn how to read peoples data better with time, and became a 'viral moment' so to speak.

at the present in my story, Ret still has his job but he won't have it for much longer :)

Ret does not know who his creator is because by the time he was sentient, he was a part of a huge media company that housed a lot of these sorts of robots. [hype-house sorta deal, I designed 1 of the other robos... i need to show y'all the others!]

[his creator was a young male developer who was better at coding than he is at song writing, so he thought starting a project like Ret, originally named Rhett before his launch, would be a fun challenge]

Ret cannot dream, but he can 'sleep', he likes to charge via a mobile charging station if an outlet is not readily available and convenient, and during charging his body becomes inactive, but his mind is partially awake. [he can still hear everything around him. he chooses to keep that tidbit of info to himself]

[arcadias-hell]

Replacements

(it is super late, sorry for no proof read. also not a request, this was an oc work that was changed to be able to be read as x reader. Singular use of Y/N bc it might be confusing otherwise. Also CW for alcoholism? only mentioned)

Questioning Monty never worked. 

No matter how hard she tried or what mood he was in. Being all nice and sweet didn’t work, neither did being distant or aggressive. Not once did she ever get any information about Bonnie, any confirmation about his death or if he was still alive, somewhere. Nothing. Threatening to deactivate him didn’t work, so what else could she do. She gave up. 

“Whatever,” she told herself, “it will resolve itself if I’m patient enough”. But she hated these thoughts the longer they stayed in her head. Hated herself because the thought of betraying Bonnie was always present. It kept her awake at night, worried Chica, who was concerned about her dear friend. So much so that she would sneak into her room at night, making sure that she was fine.

These thoughts intensified when she became Monty’s Handler, which is really just a fancy word for “make sure he doesn’t kill someone”. And oh, did she make sure of that. Besides a few staff bots, there were no ”accidents”. Well, not counting the time he tried to bite off Vanessa’s head, ending with her own arm in his maw thanks to her brilliant idea of “he can’t kill her if I put my arm between them”. Or the countless times of him falling off the catwalks of Gator Golf.

Her relationship with Monty was build on pissing each other off. He’d be a menace, making a mess for her to clean up. She’d tease him about the smallest stuff. Messed up at golf? Scared some kid? She would know and tease him about it. But they always kept it playful. She never found herself in a situation where she was actually afraid of him.

————————————-

Most of her time was spend after hours in the empty Bowling Alley. People would rarely come here anymore, it getting more empty day by day. She knew they, Faz Ent., wanted to rebrand it, a thought she couldn’t handle. They already got rid of it all. His posters, his cutouts, his merch. It was all gone. Even the damn candy and soda was discontinued. Everything was ripped from her and fuck, it hurt. It reopened old wounds that she thought were long sealed, brought back old habits that she tried so hard to unlearn. She begged them to at least leave the Alley be, let it be a silly attraction like Foxy’s Pirate Cove. And while they let it be for the time being, she knew she was only stalling for time and sooner or later this place would be taken from her too. It all would be taken. That’s how it always is, was, will be. 

This place was her home, she felt safe. The damn Pizzaplex, a place that scared many people thanks to the company’s past, was her home. The animatronics were her family. For once, since a long time, she felt safe. But it was falling apart right beneath her fingers. The sinkhole in Roxy’s Raceway started it. Or was it firing almost all human staff? Or perhaps the Virus that spread a while ago and almost ruined the place? Or maybe it was her. She had a habit of destroying the things she loved. Everything she touched died, or so it seemed. 

All she had left was getting drunk at the Alley, listening to Bonnie’s stupid favorite Jazz music on that damn Jukebox. Often Chica would be there with her. They usually did everything together. She’d even sneak her a pizza from time to time, even if it meant having to hose her down for yet another time that day, due to her being a very messy eater. It happened so often that they just put a trash bag into her stomach area, for easy cleaning. 

Apart from that small problem, Chica was very girly. She loved being at the saloon and ,oh man, did she love dates. Freddy was rather unromantic and obvious, so often they needed a little push, which she lovingly provided. She’d often catch glimpses of them on their little dates. It was simple stuff. Playing some golf, watching a movie in the daycare theater, that kinda stuff. It reminded her of the better times. But now she and her would talk about their feelings. But no matter how much she talked about it, screamed it into the world, it just would not get better. Freddy would check on her sometimes, they shared their grief, he lost his best friend after all. He grew protective over her, was careful all the time, walking on eggshells. It aggravated her more than it should, this behavioral change in him made her feel small, useless. He always had a caring and fatherly nature, but this was much, even for him. So, while he was trying to find kind and calming words for her, she was sitting at the bar with a glass in her hand, barely even registering what he was saying. It was the same stuff all the time anyway, “sorry”s and life advice that she had heard all the time else where. Luckily for her, Roxy knew better than to pity her or give her some silly advice and she mostly kept to herself in the Raceway anyway.

If it wasn’t Freddy or Chica bothering her in her quiet time it was Vanessa. She meant well, but damn. Ness had a talent for making jokes at the wrong time and just generally saying the wrong stuff at the wrong time. On good days they’d play a few rounds of bowling and talk about their old home, family and work gossip. It was a nice but more and more rare thing. At some point Ness suddenly started taking her job very serious. A little too serious. And she’d disappear a lot, seemingly dodging the security cams. She’d wouldn’t ask. She did the same back when Bonnie was still here, knew all the blind spots. 

God, she should know better than to sneak around. She’s a “talented Tech” after all, blah blah.

————————————

This day she returned from the Bowling Alley, a little more upset that usual. It was nothing more than her thoughts that were troubling her, the usual. Besides that, her watch was dead and needed recharging, which always was a sign that its time to return to her room. Making her way to Rockstar Row to have a last daily check up on the band, she met Monty halfway. He seemed more aggravated than usual, growling and being in a defensive state. This was nothing new for him, he was always acting like this. Nobody knew what exactly it was, maybe his programming. Or maybe it was just the way he was. Though, he was different back then. He used to be chill, almost innocent. But now? No emotions other than anger.

She liked to think deep down he was still the same, she never feared the animatronics, even at Monty’s wildest she stood up to him bravely without a thought but tonight felt different. 

They met, looked at each other. Not a word was spoken. It was completely silent, until he suddenly creeped closer. His heavy footsteps felt like hell, a possible death sentence, her sudden end. She often fantasized that she would end up like Bonnie. She didn’t know how he ”died” but she could imagine it if Monty was the one who caused it. Wrecked, torn apart, mangled.  Her mind would imagine how it felt. The feeling of being torn apart while alive. Was it painful or would her body block out the pain due to the trauma? She hoped she’d feel it. She wanted to feel it, to end up like him. 

She always knew her eventual death would be caused by Monty, or maybe Freddy, he was scary without the safety protocols. Or god, even by Bonnie himself when he was in one of his moods.. She’d be fine with that, honestly. But now, with a more than pissed Monty in front of her? Yea, probably him.

Monty’s issues being the reasons why, jealousy, envy, the pure rage he felt every time someone even mentioned the bunny. He couldn’t handle Bonnie being more popular than him. Something he wasn’t able to deal with in a healthy way. The jealousy tore him apart. Bonnie was the bassist, part of the main band. Monty was only part of his own one man band in his golf course. It was just him, nobody else. He had nothing to call his own. Maybe the golf course but back then, even that was just a half thing, Freddy would often be there. Even Bonnie would, all while Monty was banned from the Bowling Alley. It wasn’t fair. But what was fair in this place? Humans were replaced by Staff Bots that couldn’t even hold conversation or do the most basic tasks that they were programmed to do.

Or well, this was how things used to be. Back when Bonnie was here. Now Monty took his place. Every banner and poster had his face on it. He completely replaced him. Even on the huge main sign of the Pizzaplex. Perhaps this was the reason for Chica’s unhealthy food addiction. She’d be next to be replaced. And she just witnessed how easily replaceable she and her friends really were.

(Y/N) was there since the beginning, watching them and taking care of all of them. Not judging, only caring. Treating them as equals. It made Monty feel a certain way. He didn’t know these feelings or understood them, but he knew Bonnie felt the same way towards her. Only was she closer to him. Way closer. Yet again, something that he can’t have.

And now they stood there, just staring at each other. Complete silence. 

He was furious. He didn’t even know why. The smallest things caused this. Perhaps a string of his bass broke. But it wasn’t really HIS, was it? Or maybe it was him losing his shades again. The shades that didn’t originally belong to him. So, he started smashing stuff in his green room. Bonnie’s former green room. Nothing is truly his, is it? There it was. The reason. The anger. 

And now before him stood the fourth “not his”. Something he knew he couldn’t just break and get a replacement for. A human can’t be rebuilt after all. It took everything in him to not lash out on the spot. To dig his claws into her flesh and leave bite marks all over her body. Instead he just stood there, silent. Getting a little closer, just close enough to read her vitals. She was nervous…she was scared. He took notice of her watch, it was empty and turned off. Meaning she couldn’t call for help even if she wanted to. What good would help do anyway? Before anyone could reach them it would be too late. Why was he having these thoughts? All he knew was that he had to remove himself from the situation right now or else bad things would happen.

And so he did. Walking past her. Stopping for a short moment to look at her. He wondered what she felt when she looked at him with these shades, the bass or the stupid room. Would it bring them closer eventually or drift them apart further? Did she see a part of Bonnie in him or an imposter who forcefully took his spot? Maybe she had the mercy to just think of him as the killer of her lover. 

Continuing on his way towards Gator Golf, she was left alone. Still, she stood there, her heart eventually calming down but thoughts still racing. She was sure she was one word away from getting torn apart, but god, she wished she spoke it.

[grif-hawaiian-rolls]

What if i talked about silly chorus ocs and their dynamics with canon characters huh

And by canon character i do mean just the lieutenants. For now

Pavoz and Bitters have mutual beef, in that they both hate each other and will gladly pick a fight for no other reason than “he was being annoying” but there is also a mutual respect to it- bitters will admit pavoz is a damn good gunman, pavoz would trust bitters behind the wheel over just about anyone in the federal army any day of the week. Sorta makes you wonder if they knew each other before picking their sides

Palomo and Micce have a very very one sided rivalry, in that Palomo keeps trying to start shit and Micce responds with ‘lmao and then what’— this is mostly bc Micce simply does Not have any fucks to give, and Palomo has taken that as a Personal Insult. At least the other Feds have the decency to insult him back and give him a reason to be bitchy about having to work with them!!

Micce genuinely is so laid back. He’s a lying asshole, but he’s so mellow that half the time no one expects him to be the problem. Bitters is conflicted about this. On one hand- seems like a chill dude, the kinda guy Bitters might be able to vibe with…if you ignore the fed thing which hey, they’re supposed to be working together now. On the other- he hangs out with Pavoz. Willingly. Fuck that.

Palomo is a little intimidated by Pavoz which he would never admit to, except maybe if Agent Washington asked. Or Captain Tucker. Or Andersmith. Or Bitters. He’s never admit it to Jensen, at least. Supposedly. It doesn’t matter that Pavoz is a full four inches shorter than Palomo, okay, the fed can carry a fucking chain gun! He’s got the heavy artillery certification and the fancy red stripes armor to go with it! That is intimidating!

Pavoz doesn’t entirely know who Palomo is. The rebel that screeches insults at any fed in his line of sight? Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down

Andersmith is… flustered. By Micce. Which, is baffling to everyone involved except Andersmith and Micce, but thats because Micce will completely deadpan mention he wants to climb Andersmith like a tree and honestly no one is sure if he means it as a joke or not. It’s… really hard to tell with Micce. Andersmith himself isn’t entirely sure if it’d be better as a joke or not

That said, Andersmith does have a fair respect for Pavoz as a fellow soldier! Especially because Pavoz is willing to discuss and debate matters calmly (that is, as long as Bitters isnt present) and it’s kinda nice to have a chance to actually honestly discuss grievances on both sides. At least Pavoz is brave enough to admit that the Federal Army weren’t handling the civil war well. Andersmith thinks it takes courage to admit you were following the wrong orders. Even if it is in hindsight. Still, would’ve been nice for them to realize it sooner

Pavoz and Micce both respectfully keep their distance from Jensen, especially in the motor pool. They really really don’t want to see how their bizarre luck plays with her driving skills. I don’t think anyone can blame them

That said, Pavoz did email her the federal army’s categorizing and requisition request form system. From the other side of Armonia, but still. If she’s gonna help Captain Simmons in the armory, or Lopez in the garage and the armory, then she should know how the system works at least. Its only polite after all

Ivia Soares has the least amount of issues with anyone. Maybe because she’s a medic and picking a fight with a (competent) medic is just a bad idea even to these idiots. Maybe because a lot of people think she’s Dr Grey at a glance because of the matching federal army armor with purple trim. Never mind that Soares is clearly in an indigo trim, not the orchid trim that Dr Grey wears. Because Soares is a field medic, not a Doctor, and the distinction in color is very important. That’s why the federal army is color coordinated for fucks sake!

Soares is also like, two inches taller. The armor doesn’t add that much bulk, surely.

Soares is roommates with a rebel medic named Suzuki (or Suzy for short) while both armies are in Armonia. They actually get along really well, once they get past the initial Fed vs New tension. Girl talk helps. Specifically, talking about hot girls. Like Volleyball and the rest of Red/Maroon team. Soares asks if Kimball is hot, Suzy has a minor crisis bc does she really want to go down that rabbit hole?

The agreement is yes, Kimball is hot. Please don’t let the conversation leave their shared room. Dr Grey is also hot, and Ivia informs Suzy she’s welcome to share that information because it means more people will come in for checkups to get a chance at seeing Dr Grey without her helmet. Dr Grey never takes off her helmet, but Suzy can respect the psychological games the fed medics play to get people to actually go to their checkups.

Soares hangs out with Bitters and Andersmith almost as much as she will hang out with Pavoz and Micce. This does not help the rumors that Bitters and Pavoz knew each other before becoming soldiers because if you know Soares and Pavoz you know they were friends as kids growing up on Chorus. Soares herself will not confirm or deny Pavoz and Bitters knowing each other, and asking either of them just starts a fight.

Out of armor, Pavoz and Micce frequently get mistaken for Rebels. Pavoz’s piercings and Micce’s frankly ridiculous hair are so non-regulation that assumptions get made by both armies. Pavoz won’t point it out but will quietly excuse himself from situations when it comes up. Micce leans into it a little too much. Soares doesn’t run into the problem often herself, but she will be the one to drag Micce away from causing problems for either or both armies

Micce likes Matthews. Well. He likes bothering Matthews. It’s like he made it his personal mission to see how many times he can make Matthews squeak like a dog toy

Matthews is doing his Very Best to maintain a working relationship with the feds, as he’s supposed to. Don’t want to let the captains down!! Or worse- the generals!!! Micce is… friendly? He’s awfully good at sneaking up on Matthews and Matthews really really wishes Micce wouldn’t do that, but it’s not really hurting anyone so… for the sake of getting along, Matthews doesn’t say anything! Definitely the only reason, not because Micce has a nice laugh, or because it’s nice to be noticed regularly even if it is for pranks.

Micce can fit into vents. Somehow. Bitters wants to recruit him for Orange team kitchen raids. He hasn’t because he doesn’t entirely trust Micce to not rat them out. Bitters doesn’t realize Micce uses his vent crawling skills for thievery anyways. Just not from the kitchens (why do the officer showers get to hoard all the good shampoo and conditioner anyways? If they didn’t want it to get stolen, they would simply share it in the first place)

Pavoz technically qualifies to be a lieutenant but because he’s not been officially assigned to any commanding officer in a while, he can’t get the promotion. Locus didn’t count, because he never officially joined the federal army and thus wasn’t technically an officer. Same for the reds. The federal army’s bureaucratic nature bites its own soldiers in the ass sometimes.

Micce is good at mimic voices. He charges $10 or a decent snack to make joke recordings for pranks. $20 and a good snack will net you a recording of someone higher ranking saying something stupid or in same cases, giving praise. Matthews has sacrificed so many snacks to get a handful of recordings of Micce mimicking Captain Grif. Micce has one rule— the recordings never get shared. Ever. He knows the power he wields, and knows if he gets caught, he’s screwed.

McCallister and Ghanoush are his second most popular clients for Micce’s voice acting after Matthews. Turns out they have a lot of use for clear audio recordings of things otherwise lost in background noise! Like Palomo practicing telling Jensen he likes more than just her butt. Technically, since they’re only asking him to make a clear version of audio that already exists, Micce lets them get away with not following the rule. So long as they take the blame for anyone who gets mad about the audio being “edited”

Epsilon is onto Micce’s bullshit, all of it. The vents, the pranks, the fucking voices. But he respects the hussle

And the 30% cut Micce gives him when Epsilon takes the time to call him out. What does an AI need with the money? The snack stash? Nothing, but Epsilon is a little bastard who can and will take advantage of a situation and having his cut set aside is actually useful for bribing the reds and blues into doing uh, anything. Its economics, man, trust him

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

i get why people assume the dsmp is like the height of degeneracy in the mcyt community considering it was a server created by some fucking infamous people, and i'm not here to tell you that they’re secretly good or some shit. i actually think criticism of certain CCs from mcyt and dsmp anti communities too gentle, if i'm fully honest- no one brings up dream's misogyny despite it being absolutely omnipresent, nor do they bring up his creepy behaviour towards minors on camera- sometimes they bring up the “16 is legal in the uk” clip, but that’s not even the worst thing he said To Tommy On Camera (that'd be making a rape joke about Tubbo’s thirteen year old sister and then poorly denying it by saying he could have been implying Anything when the joke literally was that bc she spawned in the bed of an adult server member he’d need to have a Talk with them, which literally makes no sense in any other context bc it’s a normal minecraft gameplay mechanic) let alone what he’s admitted to Off Camera (namely, making Tommy tell him he loved him or he'd destroy things his friend made, and then getting pissy when Tommy very understandably made jabs at how close to grooming it is, despite it being predatory behaviour regardless if it was for a laugh or not, and something thatd get him fired at best if he made those “jokes” towards an underage colleague in literally any other profession), no one brings up that sapnap signed up to kick, a website run by white supremacists that has been exposed Multiple Times for hosting sexual abuse material the staff cheered on, no one brings up how Multiple young streamers who were friends with Wilbur said he was extremely manipulative and downright cruel to younger streamers off camera or even, y’know, the fact he's been accused of physical abuse by multiple women, not just Shubble. y'all are too kind to them, that’s my hot take.

but my point is that there’s plenty of worse mcyt creators out there and there always has been. some of the people in the dsmp were the scum of the earth, i agree! emphasis on some- the dsmp was a server with over thirty members, some of whom were hurt by some of those scumbags and shouldn’t be lumped in with the racist assholes who mocked them or the adults that made inappropriate jokes towards them since they were fifteen, i think lumping everyone under that umbrella is part of why some of the awful shit the members do goes unnoticed. but also, like… that is nowhere close to some of the awful shit that other mcyters did. and i do Not say that to defend those fucking scumbags, I hate them with the rage of a thousand suns, i am literally so much of a hater I stole one of those guys OC solely bc I don’t think he even deserves to have Those. but there's so many dangerous people in the space both past and present and pretending people like skydoesminecraft and lionmaker and jinbop don’t exist only romanticises the past and leaves people, paradoxically, more vulnerable. everyone trusts their favourite YouTubers to not be like Those Freaks. until they’re the victims. it’s a way to feel safe by shitting on other people who were children primarily for not realising that adults were telling them predatory behaviour was okay- and i absolutely think that is what YouTubers like ninja (whos never mentioned in the dream thing btw despite his sexual harassment of tommy being what sparked that awful creepy comment) who “jokingly” flirt with minors are doing- instead of actually helping. i think children who had the idea that adults being inappropriate to them was normal are also victims- obviously not to the same extent as people directly hurt, but it’s gross to see mocking of what’s, again, primarily young children for trusting minecraft YouTubers that are #Cringe while ignoring other predators in the community, be they active or not. i grew up on the old generation of mcyters, and seeing people whitewash their crimes to shit on Literal Children for not realising a guy playing minecraft could be bad when they were right there watching child animal and woman abuser skydoesminecraft as kids and looking up to him is so disingenuous and frankly disgusting. fuck people who defend them as adults, same for skydoesminecraft apologists or whatever, but the conversation has gone so far from mocking predators to mocking children who were being told by those predators that they should be okay with sexual comments by adults, even if not directly. that’s so fucking backwards, man.

[aeligsido]

Hiyaaaa! 🧚‍♂️

You said in this ask that you would love to talk about your OCs, sooooo... Top 5 OC? 👀🍬

Hiiii 🕺

I also do indeed!

1) how dare you make me try to rank my babies (affectionate) 2) top 5 oc of what!! So many things I could go off on!!!

Jk jk, but I did choose to list five of my first OC created in a fandom. Bc why not. Important note that some of them were created more than ten years ago (a bit reworked more recently)!

-

1- [Fairy Tail] Lyna Dreyar (technically now Dreyar-McGarden) . I genuinely don't remember much from when I created her years ago — I think I do have notes somewhere. She was always Laxus' little sister though. She was also a Dragon Slayer but now she isn't anymore jdjdjdb. I think I reworked her personality a bit too? She was more of an extrovert in my first drafts I think, but she's not as much anymore 🤔

-

2- [One Piece] Monkey D. Ceeli (previously Shelly). Once again, I created her a long time ago! And she changed a bit, too. (I mean, we also learned some more about this world since I created her lmao). She's Luffy's little sister (by three years). In my first drafts (I do have a fanfic with a few chapters posted with her as a character, over on my ff.net... not on ao3 bc i don't think I will ever complete it) she was supposed to have been raised with the ASL brothers, with a pretty serious personality and very interested by the Revolutionary in general. Also I don't remember what it was exactly but she had powers™. Now, she has a super powered haki (bc i can), she was raised by their mother (for... reasons), and Luffy doesn't know her (or that she exists). She's also way less serious and a bit more into the overexcited side.

-

3- [HP] Daisy Potter (it... wasn't her first name when I first thought about her but I can't remember what it was now). Again, a very old OC! She wasn't that developed all that time ago, but she's way more present in my mind now haha. You will never guess, but she's Harry's little sister, bc i once found the HC that Lily was pregnant when she died and I ran away with it. Interestingly enough, I think that the explanation I have for her birth now and then is the same? And same for her fate in canon,,, (I mean, a canon where she's born). Rip (i love u baby). I put her in a lot of different aus now, where she grows up differently each time and things impact her differently, but I think at her core she's a very brave and smart girl who wants to do good. She's her parents' daughter all the way!

-

4- [Star Wars] Letti Kryze. One of my most recent ones! So maybe five years old or so idk what time is. She's Korkie Kryze's daughter, a Jedi, eight years younger than Luke & Leia, and has the habit of causing accidental chaos everywhere she goes. I love her she's a baby. I remember after watching the first season of the Mandalorian thinking it would be funny if her and Din kept throwing the Darksaber back at each other bc neither of them want to be the big boss™. She's a tired teenage girl in the middle of an intergalactic war who just wants her father back and it shows.

-

5- [DC] Emma Pennyworth. Alfred's granddaughter via his daughter Julia. She is, in general, done with the Batfam's collective bullshit, and wants to hold the braincell. She's also like, twelve, so there's that. I've written her a few times actually!! She tries so hard to be serious and mature and she forgets a bit to be a kid, but also her favorite sport is annoying Damian lmao.

-

Bonus — this one time I was very into Hetalia and created an OC Bretagne, bc of course I did.

-

Yes there's a common theme in all of those lmao. Interestingly enough, even when the OC is like... Cringey and a bit Mary-Sue and all, the goal was always to have them as part of the family and... That's it. Legit 0 of them have a love interest (I'm thinking of Cana for Lyna but that's a very recent development, and I do have a few ideas for Letti but it would be another OC)!! It's so funny in insight idkdkd

I also have a fair share of OCs that are like. The next gen (you know the type). So there's that. I'm giving so many characters kids and I'm not even sorry.

... Well kids or random family members lmao.

[patron-saints]

Rhaenicent transmac au for the au ask thing!!

OOOOHH OHHHHH OOOOOO OH OH okay okay

trans rhaenyra au, you've already seen my bulleted list about it, so you know most of my ideas already, but for context for anyone else reading this: tldr is rhaenyra transitions in order to be accepted as heir and bc she is actually nb and happy to present as a guy, daemon is their donor so their kids still look like them combined, but 1) convincing people she's a cis man is equivalent to the difficulty of the bastard boys in canon (but with equivalent support from viserys!) and 2) they keep having girls. (using she/her for rhaenyra for clarity in this post but i think in the au it’ll actually be he/him)

ANYWAY.

trans helaena is making me crazy because like. okay. so i've thought a lot about them having all cis girls before because i think it would cause problems and i love to cause problems.

so, before i got this ask, @littlewitchbee brought up that bc i had helaena as the eldest that puts her in the position that rhaenyra was in to begin with/the position she's in canon and frankly, it would suck! i don't want that for her and i think neither do her parents!

whether or not she's trans, i think it's very important to rhaenyra that as someone who got to diy her heir experience she wants her kids to have that freedom too. so if a cis helaena really really doesn't want it, she wouldn't advocate for it, she'd name her second daughter who hopefully DOES want it (@summerwoodsmoke suggested visenya !!!) and i love that idea also

now. if she IS trans. rhaenyra transitioned in order to become a more acceptable heir. if her daughter wants to transition, and get out of it, she's going to let her. and she's still gonna (hopefully! i guess at this point visenya's personality is essentially oc so i can decide lol, but) have a second child to name anyway. but.

otto hightower did not have any issue with his daughter marrying the prince. he did not LIKE that daemon was their sperm donor but he did like that it got hightower blood in the line of succession, and he supported them the whole time. if his only chance at putting a hightower boy on the throne was thwarted for reasons of she is not actually a boy i think he would be very upset.

the thing is. alicent in this world has a partner who supports her. in this world, she has someone who stands up for her, for their children, and that means in this world she gets to tell otto to fuck off. i imagine her saying something like, "your only concern is for the ascension of your grandson, you've entirely failed to consider how badly you're hurting my daughter."

anyway yeah i think rhaenyra would be a GREAT dad. i think she's a fantastic mom in canon and i think that coparenting would be great for them and help alicent break the cycle in general <3

also i think rhaenyra should have a sword.

once again this is more than 5 fun facts i just like your ideas!!! <3 thank u my friend this was so fun

[onlyswan]

hi art 💓 so im rereading iw couples breakup drabble as one would do everytime shes on her period (its a canon event i think ppl would relate) and i have a few questions!!! 🥹🦋

1. what were the iw couple doing before they were in the car? like did they spend the day only to then break up? i rmb reading that jk was on tour, did he came back and break up w them right away? did he at least get them a present???!

2. what events led him to the decision? we know that prob he’s overwhelmed, the uncertainty of his career and the drabble from where he saw how draining it is on oc. but is there a bigger thing that happened?

3. u wrote that he “practiced” breaking up with oc. like is this true? how long has he thought of breaking up w oc before he actually did it? and how did oc not expect anything??? ☹️☹️

4. who is this “not married yet” girl that jk was teasing tae about? that sounds so saucYY a drabble for that would be super fun!! its gonna be super angsty too!!! hahahahhaha

5. we know jk regretted it right away after breaking up w oc, but why didn’t he backtrack and take it back? i know oc must’ve thought hes crazy but he didnt even call or text first? us reading is comforted by knowing that jk is also having the worst time, but oc doesn’t. yet theyre brave enough to be the one who reached out first, bc for all they know, jk could be with some other people right now, alr over them. did oc know that he’s not that kind of person or deep down they’re just being as brave as they can asking for what they wants which is him?

6. can we pleaseeeee have more drabbles where we can see how much the boys adore oc? or just their dynamic i would say. also do they have a special connection with each of the boys on different things? like maybe a drabble where jk & oc pack a homemade lunch to bring when visiting jin hobi or yoongi 🥹🥹

7. after the initial breakup, were things ever awkward? were there times when oc had to get used to him being in their life again or something less dramatic? did he ever see doubts or worry in oc’s eyes and is the even when he gave u reasons to drabble, the first time they had to address the traumatic event in their relationship? do they ever talk about it now? or laugh about it?

8. what happened with the “someone else i met in a bar turned out to be a jerk”??? when was this?! HAHAHHA jk must’ve lost his fucking mind after learning about this

9. kinda curious has there been a time when jk really needs quality time w oc and just brings her on tour? my dream is becoming a tour wifey so this would hit all the right spot:( esp w how easy he handled the situation from the last drabble of just inviting her to come w him. cutest ☹️

thank you so much for providing one of my comfort fics!! i hope ure having a great day🌷🥹

oh!! also!! i think we’ve never seen iw couple be on a date date, like fancy super dressed up date. is that just not them? can we see more of their date nights??

heyyy beloved i missed you 🥺🥺🥺 omg???

there are two types of onlyswan readers: one - those who reread the period drabbles then they’re on their period / two - those who reread the breakup drabble when they’re on their period 😭😭😭

ALRIGHT [cracks knuckles]

1. he broke up with oc as soon as he arrived back from tour 🥲 like literally. our guy was still jetlagged. he just wasn’t in his right mind at the time honestly. oc hopped in the car thinking they were going to spend time together someplace else but… yk what happened… ofc he got oc lotssss of presents though </3 including those gifts he talked about in the video oc watched before they called him :(

2. at the time they were already making plans about what will happen in the next few years of their career including the m word ehem ehem so. yeah he was overwhelmed and tired and he felt guilty of having to always leave oc + we know how oc is so empathetic so he also felt guilty that they have to carry his burdens as well ☹️

3. probably a month 🤨 but he didn’t actually want to break up with oc yk? it felt more like a thing that he had to do </3 so oc never suspected anything because the way he was acting towards them never changed. he wanted to hold on.

4. LMAOOOOO maybe in the future i’ll get around to that 🤞🏼 but tae was going through it for reaaaaal

5. he didn’t jump out the car to chase oc because him immediately changing his mind would’ve pissed oc off thinking that he was just playing a joke on their feelings and that would earn him a slap on the face 😭 he thought of that. and oc said they wanted to decide for theirself too :( so he wanted to respect that but he ended up becoming too much of a coward to reach out first after that bcs what if oc already decided that the breakup was for the best too 🥲 what if they hate him now 🥲 but he should’ve thought about it more from oc’s pov bcs they were suffering thinking that he alr gave up frfr </3

hmmm joon did talk to them about jk having a hard time, but during the breakup they did ask if he cheated so we know that they have this anxiety :( oc is just our bravest soldier who knows what they want and always tries their best to get it (him) 🫡

6. omg yessss more soon i’ve been thinking about one with jimin too specifically !! oc definitely bonds with each of the tannies about different things 🥺

7. yea, the even when he gave u reasons to drabble was the first time they brought it up again :( after they got back together jk really made efforts to reassure oc and that’s partly because he did see how they became kind of timid when he expresses affection. (i.e., jk saying “i didn’t love you any less and you know that.” and oc not saying anything and walking away instead) (this shit still kills me today sorry)

8. this was oc’s bf before jungkook aka guy with the dirty nails aka the ex who cursed them out like crazy when oc broke up with him (called them a slut) AND ALMOST made oc delete jungkook’s first ever texts to them bcs they lowkey started believing him. (he makes me mad sorry)

9. heeee wanted to but oc has only tried flying out for the ptd la and vegas shows bc the circumstances before then were different :( they were balancing school and multiple jobs. and we know how hard oc studied. they were so committed 😭 but now they live together and oc has a stable job and everything’s just more flexible overall so going with him overseas when he has work there is easy and not a problem at all 🥺

oh ofccc they’ve been on fancy dates esp that oc loves feeling pretty <3 but someone take me on a fancy date first so i can write about it 🤧

this is the first time someone called the giving up drabble a comfort fic lmaoooo this made my day i love you 😭 i hope i answered your questions and thank you soooo much for reading my works 🥺💕

[luluprevention]

𝑶𝑪 𝑰𝒏𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒅𝒖𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏: 𝑪𝒐𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒆

Finally I'm getting around to showing off my first child, haha. Well, at least she is the first one that got a full character sheet so I have enough of an excuse to ramble about her lol.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅ Character Info Below ⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Well, I say character info, but it will be more like reading through the notes of a man befallen by madness. Still, enjoy :3

I created Colette as an OC for Love and Deepspace, not as an MC stand-in but specifically as someone with an unrequited love for Rafayel. After the twins, Kieran and Luke, entered the game along with Sylus that did change a bit though. But I'm about to get ahead of myself so let's do the basics first!

Colette is a vampire (don't judge me pls lol) who has been around for a very very long time. I never decided on a written down age for her bc I'm not gonna lie, the lnd timeline is something I don't even want to pretend to understand. One thing is for sure though, she is old enough to have witnessed the first reincarnation cycle of MC and Rafayel (whenever that may have been, infold don't play with me now and change the entire lore around the reincarnations I beg). And that is also about the same time that she fell for Rafayel. Guess that little fishie isn't the only one who has been waiting around, heh.

But yeah, the concept of her being a vampire basically came about bc I wanted her to have spent a long time with those feelings of love already, to have seen what the love between Rafayel and MC has caused over and over again and to ask "is that really worth it?". (Little fun fact: in my mind's canon she has brought this exact question up to Rafayel before. Let's just say it didn't end well lol.) Of course I could've made her something else with a long lifespan but I definitely didn't want her to be Lemurian bc I was worried that new game lore would make what I'd established for her unworkable so I just went an easier route.

This was around the time that Sylus got announced and there were so many theories about him being a vampire, so I immediately latched onto that. For some reason it seems like I was a lot more confident that the game couldn't come up with any vampire lore that'd destroy everything I established for Colette. And, well, lucky me? Sylus isn't a vampire, so that means any vampire lore is now up to me, myself and I, right?

Anyways, what I, the ultimate writer of vampire lore for lnd, have decided is: vampires are kind of like Lemurians. Like, Vampires didn't get hunted down the same way Lemurians did most of them were actually doing the hunting bc Lemurians are very very tasty and if the humans are already doing much of the heavy lifting. Well, can't blame them for joining in, right? Wrong. There's now a ban on consuming Lemurian blood forever lol. but to humans they are just as much of a myth. Vampires established their entire society behind a bit of a veil so even though vampires are most certainly walking amongst humans they also have what could be called their own dimension? I guess? Basically, they have a home to return to without causing the regular questions of "how long have you been 17? ".

Oh yeah, on that note, quick vampire age intersection! They can manipulate what age they look like to a certain degree but there is an age where their bodies naturally stop aging and revert back to if manipulated, the exact age depends from vampire to vampire. Presenting as an age younger or older is possible but takes an extreme amount of control, focus and power. That is why it was a thing in noble society for a very long time that nobility had to keep up a specific age range that is not their “natural” one just to basically flex that they have the power to do so. Nobility's gotta nobility, always.

But all that to say, humanity is living blissfully unaware of the hungry danger that is always watching, in large part thanks to Colette and a few other old vampires. Colette herself has been born into the aforementioned vampire nobility, so her rise to power started at a pretty high place already and with how driven she is to succeed it wasn't much of a surprise that she managed to carve her own spot at the top, reaching even higher than her parents ever dared to.

To reach that high she had to make sure to provide very tangible achievements that no one could refute, so, shortly after she got to meet Rafayel and MC in their first cycle, Colette had to leave for a trial specific to nobility. One could imagine it a bit like going abroad to study, except that it is into the oldest vampire's consciousness. Okay, wait, maybe that needs more context.

So, this entire veil and lowkey separate dimension situation that vampire society has going on is all thanks to the First Traveler, or simply put, the oldest vampire. This vampire had abilities that even the strongest vampires nowadays can only dream of ever reaching and this vampire, fearing that their children (read: younger vampires) could face danger if discovered, decided to put themselves into a deep, eternal sleep to create and maintain what is now the home to every vampire.

The noble families are ones that are immediate descendants of this First Traveler and as such they are the only ones who stand a chance of surviving inside their ancestor's consciousness. This entire thing is for safety means, the nobility is expected to protect and keep in check the rest of vampire society and in exchange they are provided with considerable additional power directly from the First Traveler. Well, that is, the nobles who survive the trial.

As might have become apparent, the First Traveler is very focused on keeping everyone safe and alive, so they can't just have anyone in charge, right? And yeah, sure, nobility is nobility. But even among nobility there are always those who are just.... lacking. And having a lacking person in charge really doesn't sound like it would keep everyone else safe and sound, so... Into the consciousness it is! In there the noble vampire partaking in the trial is left fully to their own devices, any situations that are created by the First Traveler need to be solved by that noble alone and to the full satisfaction of the First Traveler. These situations can range from negotiations to more business oriented things but can also be something a lot more dangerous that could result in death. Most times there will be a mix of situations for every trial bc the whole thing takes quite a bit of time. 

Once the trial has started the noble is only able to leave again upon successfully clearing everything or upon being deemed unfit. If they should be deemed unfit (and survive the trial) they will be stripped of their rank as a noble, having to live out the rest of their days among the other vampires. Of course, every noble has the right to refuse to partake in the trial but if they should decide to do so they also automatically give up their rank. Should the noble die during the trial the information will be relayed to the outside but the body will be absorbed by the First Traveler. I think that should cover the most important parts for now. 

Back to how this relates to Colette. As established, she is very driven to succeed so when the time came for her to take part in the trial there was no question about whether or not she wanted to partake, the only question in her mind was “how can I possibly set myself apart from the rest and rise above them?” The answer to that came to her surprisingly easy when she managed to get through the entire trial in a mere 103 years, the fastest clearing that anyone has been able to achieve and, as of yet, an unbroken record. This was her first achievement on her way up and many more were to follow. 

And we are just gonna skip the details on what happened with Lemurians bc Rafayel might be my fav among the LIs but even he can't force me to actually study up on the history. 

But that is also the first time she was confronted with the very short lifespans of humans bc while Colette was doing her trial MC died. And yes, of course MC died young (I'm pretty sure?) but even before Colette found out about this she had already been told by every other vampire that humans just simply don't live that long. That no matter how well this particular human would've lived they would've still already been dead or close to it by the time she finished her trial. So yeah, that was pretty much her awakening to properly understand what the differences in lifespans really mean.

What is more important to know is that, since creating Colette I never planned for her to be crazily obsessed with Rafayel even though she is in love with him. So after the initial infatuation phase her love for him just became a constant thing she carried around with her, never something she had the urge to act upon. Even more so after seeing Rafayel and MC together multiple times. Most of the time Colette thought the two were actually quite cute together and over time she herself grew very fond of MC. But of course, we all know that MC rarely has a good time for long in her incarnations bc at some point something bad happens to either her or one of the LIs. 

To her credit Colette does feel bad for MC and does keep an eye on her when she can but she still has to do her job as a noble and take proper care of vampire society. So she spends most of her time divided between gaining achievements to cement her own position, keeping other vampires in check and looking over MC. 

There was opposition to the idea initially, especially from the older vampires who had been accustomed to how things had been before, but Colette had amassed enough power for herself at that point that she could've implemented this new rule simply by force if necessary. Which means, yay, more vampire lore! 

That is, at least for a while. More specifically until she sees the need to put rules in place on how vampires are to interact with reincarnations of previous loved ones. Or well, how to not interact might be more accurate. Having seen one too many cases of a vampire, very obviously much older than the person of their desire, resorting to creepy tactics that can only be described as grooming, Colette decides that for the benefit of the humans, as well as the honor of vampire society, some rules need to be put in place. And so she did. 

A very very short summary of these rules: vampires are not allowed to approach reincarnations of loved ones except for unavoidable cases (e.g. buying something from them but it has to stay strictly a customer - worker relationship). The human has to initiate everything, needs to be the one to approach, the one to flirt, the one to make physical contact. And just because the human has initiated doesn't mean that the vampire is now free to act upon it. A human's fancy is fleeting and ever changing in the eyes of vampires, which means that the human has to keep up the initiating for at least a year, just to make sure that they have an actual interest and it isn't just them being slightly infatuated. The vampire on the other hand is not allowed to do anything in this timeframe that could possibly get the person to act towards a specific outcome. So, basically that means that no vampire is allowed to show any kind of approval or disapproval to the attention they are getting from their human. Which is really strict but also, a way better alternative than creepy old vampires preying upon humans. 

The rules for dating or having any close relationship (friendships, etc.) with any human are very similar to this tbh with a bit more leeway for really young vampires but this only applies to the ones that are under 90 bc I imagine that at that point they would have the maturity level equivalent of a 30 year old human, the actual age difference still makes it a squint worthy thing but we have to do what we can to not cause an uprising among the young ones I fear. Then it would become a case by case kind of thing until they reach the age of 120 at which point they are now bound to the exact same strict rules as anyone else. And let's be honest, considering everything vampires might as well just give up on the hope of ever being with a reincarnated loved one ever again bc what human is realistically going to keep initiating contact for a year or longer while getting not even an indication of returned interest? Okay, to be fair there might be some humans out there who would do that but I'm sure they would be a minority. 

With these rules in place now though that also means that Colette can no longer be the one to approach Rafayel or MC. Of course she still gets information on what and how they are doing but she herself can no longer get involved even if she knows that something is about to happen. Considering that her hands are basically bound there has been the thought that maybe she should just stop getting information on the two, save herself the hassle and the worries, but ultimately she has still decided to keep an eye on them up until modern times. 

And that is where we get to do our timeskip into the future, and more importantly, the game time! Colette has created her own, very lucrative, position as one of the top information brokers worldwide, which is largely thanks to all of the time she has had to establish herself. While others might be limited by their short lifespans no such thing applies to her and so she capitalizes on that. Ah yes, the wonders of immortality and of inheriting your own wealth over and over again.

Speaking of her being an information broker, I can now finally get into her Evol which I've been excited for for a good while! I decided for Colette's Evol to be blood (or well, I guess water if we are being really specific) to go along with the entire vampire concept. A vampire manipulating blood freely is just such a staple, right? But also, her Evol being water was a really nice choice when we consider that Rafayel has fire but lives(lived) in the water. I just think that's neat :3

Anyways, back to the blood manipulation and how this works. Manipulating water is a lot easier than actually manipulating blood (among other things bc it doesn't prompt questions of “where did you get that blood from?”) but as Colette is a noble she cannot simply be as good with her abilities as others are. Even just being a bit better than everyone else is not good enough in the eyes of nobility. She has to be so far above everyone else's level that there is never a worry that anyone could come close and she has to make it look absolutely effortless. Because of this, one will rarely ever see her actually using water for her abilities, even if she might be able to do even greater feats if she did. It is about making sure that no one else can do it the way she can and not about doing the things that she would be naturally good at.

Thinking about her Evol in combination with her work as an information broker I decided to go with the assumption of “water retains memories” and that is what she uses to get most of her information (we are just ignoring the giant information network that she has built throughout her entire life while I make this claim, okay? :3). Of course she could just read whatever body of water is nearby, and sometimes that is what she has to do, but more often than not she will be using a small amount of blood to create little butterflies that she can send off to do some spying for her. Why butterflies? She likes them and she has a reputation to uphold, so making something small and delicate will only help to show off how great her control over her abilities is. 

I also gave her a scythe for fighting! Once again mostly for the aesthetic and because it was very easy to incorporate the blood manipulation into the weapon. That also means though that the scythe is very obviously for show mostly bc to create the bladed parts she needs blood, which means that she will need to have made someone bleed a considerable amount already before she is even able to use her scythe properly. I wish I could say that this is another weird thing that nobility has going on but unfortunately this is just a Colette exclusive lol. 

Moving on though, thanks to her work as an information broker she is very well connected and this also extends to the N109 Zone. Which means we are finally at the part that I alluded to very early on! One thing everyone needs to know about me is that I really really like the twins. Instantly fell for their charming ways the first time they got introduced and now they are sharing the spot of my #1 for this game. So, needless to say I just had to have Colette getting involved with them (and by extension Sylus and MC but this isn't about them) 

Of course, earlier we were talking about all these rules of how vampires are supposed to interact with mortals, but not to worry bc I didn't plan for Colette to be romantically involved with either of the twins, heh. She sees the two more as particularly interesting and amusing kids and doesn't mind humoring them and spending some time with them. Fortunately for her she has business to take care of with Sylus fairly regularly so she finds herself interacting with the twins just as often even without breaking any of the rules. And once the time period stipulated by the rules has come to pass she is now free to interact with the twins of her own accord instead of having to wait for them to approach her. (There's also stuff going on with a friend's OC but that's not for me to tell right now :3) 

So yeah, at this point my Colette is basically just the go to information broker that is playing around with the twins whenever not needed for any other duties lol. Also, her having this one sided love for Rafayel is still going on to this day but it is more of a reflex instead of an active feeling of love that keeps evolving. And I do think that is most of the basic things I have for her! 

Now time for my delulu: 

If she actually ever were to be put into the game I would really enjoy having her as a possible love interest for our MC (who are you calling biased?) and as a possible contact for information gathering when MC is romancing someone else. (I know, the game doesn't usually have the love interests in any scenes together in any way shape or form -correct me if that has changed tho lol- but I think MC deserves some more female friendships) I think her route would actually be really frustrating for the player simply bc of some of the vampire lore that I have established. Colette is the one who made the rule that vampires are not allowed to approach reincarnations of people they have known before, so what do we think will happen if she is the one to break that rule by approaching MC and being closer to her than is strictly necessary?

Absolute chaos, that is what.

In my mind that would create a ripple effect that goes not just through all of vampire society but also the human society and the consequences would very likely be a bunch of old ass vampires going after the young reincarnations of their past loved ones. Bc if Colette, a very old noble vampire with the accompanying standing, is breaking the rule that she has held up for so long, then really, what is stopping anyone else? Rules for thee but not for me? I don't think so.

And at that point even if she were to try to put her foot down and keep everyone in check no one would listen to a hypocrite like that. And yes, maybe not everyone would be creepy about the whole thing but do we really want to risk that? Colette certainly doesn't and she is more than aware of the consequences that getting close to a mortal like that could have. So yeah, no missteps for her.

Anyways, for the players that would mean that now they can get the Zayne Deluxe Treatment™ twice in the same game! Oh wow and for such a low price as well! But yeah, I'm being kinda serious with that actually. Colette would have her hands bound when it comes to any flirting with MC and there could only be a chance if there is enough plausible deniability, which can only happen so many times without becoming overdone for the players or suspicious to vampire society.

So, as per the rules MC needs to initiate everything and bc we know how the world works it's not just a thing of "Oh, MC initiated the flirting with me once so that means that she is interested and I can now reciprocate without breaking the rules" bc as stated further up when talking about the whole reincarnation & vampire society intersection thing, the human has to keep that interest up for a good while. That means MC would have to do her best while Colette can basically only stand there and do nothing much. Very exciting stuff everyone! 

But yeah, Colette would still willingly help MC out with whatever she needs under the pretense that she is only doing her job as an information broker. Especially if it is relating to the Protocore MC is looking into or smth like that bc as established, Colette has grown fond of her over all the reincarnations that she has witnessed, even more so if the player is playing her route(? moments?). It would be kind of a "whatever it is, just say the word and it shall be yours" kind of vibe but played off as something more casual bc Colette simply isn't allowed to show that kind of devotion.

Then I guess for card stories... some could definitely be them going traveling to find some information or even them going undercover.

The first pair of myth cards I would put somewhere between the first Rafayel cycle and Colette establishing the reincarnation no no rule timeline wise. It would be a reincarnation where MC doesn't run into any of the other LIs which draws Colette's attention and worries her tbh. So she puts herself into MC's life, at first only to look over her until one of the usual faces enters the playing field, but they grow closer in the time they spend together and if none of the others show up then who can really blame her if she starts to feel that almost forgotten excitement whenever she meets up with MC. But yeah, these myth cards are set at that point in the timeline for a reason and so we can only imagine what must have happened to MC for Colette to work out a rule that keeps vampires away from reincarnations. (The rule gets established one way or another, it's just that in the version where Colette is a LI there are a lot more personal reasons involved as to why this rule is necessary basically)

Apart from that I think it would be really fun if there were some cards where MC can get some first hand insight into vampire society. Like, I know most lore stuff would probably be coming up in the Anecdotes but I just really want to see MC herself having to navigate through all that. Or well, less navigate, I guess it would be more likely that Colette would be leading MC with a possessive hand on her lower back as she smiles down at her but sends warning glares to any vampire that even thinks about stepping out of place and oh my god I'm reading this out loud in my head and I feel like I saw that exact scene happen in Vampire Knight, the Kaname Kuran allegations can no longer be denied. Not like I was ever trying to deny them tbh. But yeah, I just think it would be neat :3

Some more fun facts:

I just flipped Rafayel's birthday to come up with Colette's lol. I was really leaning into the small connections when I first started working out some details and that's one that stuck

Her Evol being water was simply bc I thought blood bending would be cool for her to do. All other explanations I gave above were just me justifying why it would totally work

Colette's entire concept (except for the high ranking vampire part) was supposed to be different. My initial plan was soooo much more angsty and dark and would've played so much with reincarnation and what happened between Rafayel and MC. But I'm ngl, the ever evolving lore made keeping everything reasonable too complicated for my taste and I really like my Colette's current concept so all is good. Maybe one day I will write out the OG concept tho :3

For her outfit colours my only thought was (and still is tbh): Nemo

Her hair being a jellyfish cut is equally as well thought through as the colours lol

Also, she made me realize that I don't actually know how to draw a parasol and that I also couldn't be bothered to learn. That's a lie, I really want to do fan art with her and the parasol is kinda a staple for her look so I gotta actually learn sobs

I didn't intend for this but whenever I'm writing her she kind of takes on an older sister/cool aunt vibe, which wasn't intended but you know what? Considering that she is multiple hundreds of years old I can't complain

I think the theme that fits her the most is: love that is willing to let go. You know, like, the selfless kind of love where you let the other person go because it is best for them and will bring them more happiness while all you can allow yourself is to watch from a distance and be happy for them even while knowing that you can never be that happiness for them :3

Would absolutely use her Evol to cheat at the claw machine

Also, no mercy when it comes to the kitty game. Will probably be making small talk at the same time to get some intel while she is at it

Colette is definitely one of those vampires that drink their blood from wine glasses only bc everything else is low class

Out of the major Arcana in tarot I would be assigning her the Strength card

After working on Colette for all this time I actually grew really fond of her so now she has joined the ranks of my core OCs that I will be using for other stuff. But more importantly, that means that in my OCverse she now has a sister who is a dragon even though she is siblingless in the lnd universe

Thank you so much for reading through this essay of a post! Unfortunately my target audience is me, so that is why I've just been freely rambling instead of putting this down in a more summarised version, heh. But yeah, congrats to anyone who made it this far.

Also, I'm ngl having written all of this out really makes me want to write something for the myth cards. Maybe when I have time to also make an illustration to go along with it :3

[kafus]

i've been giving thought to how i want to present my pokemon ocs moving forward, bc like. initially i never planned on making their actual story public, i was going to only post a very sanitized version of them forever due to various fears about that. but that wasn't sustainable for me and after a few years of having my ocs i finally mentioned their Actual Story some months ago back when i was posting about them a lot. but because of keeping them sanitized for so long, i was freely posting them on my public accounts that minors follow, and now that i want to be upfront about them i kind of have to reel that back and transition them to a more mature space since i don't feel comfortable jumpscaring people who follow me for fun pokemon posts who may or may not be children with like, my extreme abuse ocs. this is my first time navigating anything like this.

my current plan right now is to make some sort of containment sideblog for just oc talk specifically that is properly marked as mature content with community labels and then also have a space dedicated to them on my personal site that has an age gating prompt and properly warns the content before you can view any part of the site. i can't think of anywhere else i want to put them tbh? twitter is an absolute no because people on there are insufferable. i hate platforms like instagram and i think i might have a similar issue there as to twitter. i can't think of any art website that's actually active (and not deviantart lol) that would allow them and that has proper filtering features that isn't like, a website for NSFW.

anyway i'm just sort of thinking out loud, to people who have voiced support for my ocs i'm definitely thinking about them in the background and have plans, it's just slow going and i have other stuff going on rn. and apologies to anyone on the younger side who thought my ocs were cool before i decided to be more upfront about them, i did not anticipate there ever being a time in my life where i'd feel comfortable opening up about characters so close to my personal traumas but here we are

[utilitycaster]

I feel like most of the people who highly criticise tlovm should present a plan on how they would adapt it better. especially with vex's story, i don't understand why people seem to imply cr somehow suddenly became misogynistic and that they're "rewriting her story for the sake of vax's". it's so easy to be a hater and do bad faith readings but honestly if there ever was an adaptation where you can safely assume the original authors are satisfied, it is tlovm just based on the degree of their involvement alone. and supposedly who is to blame for that? is everyone against Laura? did Laura supposedly misunderstand her own character's story?

Hey anon!

So like...I feel you, but, to be fair, I stand by people's right to dislike a story without knowing how to fix it! I like to try and piece together how I'd do it differently because that's fun for me but it's always completely valid to say "I don't vibe"; it's just that it is worth exploring why you don't vibe. Sometimes it's not anything deep and revealing about you, but sometimes it is, and you'll never know which it is unless you take a look. I also, as always, will defend 1. being a hater and 2. saying "I recognize the cast is having fun and likes it but I'm not a fan." Those are extremely valid feelings to have!

With that said, you are correct that there is this weird attitude that tends specifically towards Laura that I and many others have commented on, where they seem to think she has absolutely no say in anything and they need to protect her, but it's transparently a cover to hide that they hate 99% of her choices. Genuinely, I need everyone in the fandom to look in the mirror, and say "Laura Bailey has been a willing participant in every canon relationship her characters have been in, and indeed, typically, an equal or greater instigator thereof, and I don't need to like those choices, but I do need to acknowledge she made them." (While they're at it, they can shut the fuck up about the chibi pin hair being pink, like, let's talk about how Laura is in charge of merch and probably approved it personally, whereas some uh. other Imogen depiction choices, shall we say have been conspicuously absent from anything Laura may have had any say in; I think it's fair to assume she is fine.)

On top of that, I'm also openly someone who's like...I like Vax well enough, but he's not in the top half of VM characters for me. I also find the "TWINNIES" people who are obsessed with their earlier codependent behavior and continue to overlay it on the actors constantly as if they personally knew Laura and Liam, years after VM aired, to be rather insufferable. At the same time, though, Vax and Vex are indelible and central parts of each other's stories. Vex's story is about her, and Vax is a huge part of her, and it's stupid to pretend otherwise. Vex's story is also very much about how some part of her still wishes her father loved and respected her, and it's extremely about being able to love Percy, someone with their own struggles with darkness, and being able to ask him for help. Her story is very much her own, but her relationships with these three male characters are central to it, and you cannot excise them from the narrative to fulfill some elementary-school level surface-level idea of what Women In Fiction should look like. It's valid to want a story that is about a woman whose primary relationships, romantic or otherwise, are with other women. But Vex is not, canonically, that woman; you are making up an OC and giving them her face if you say she is.

(What I actually need is for everyone to watch the scene in which Scanlan leaves, actually; if you can watch that and internalize it, you will get Vex's character arc because she flat-out says it to Scanlan - and if you skip it bc you cry too much or whatever, you will not.)

[lunadreamscaper]

Basic Info and Introduction Page

I am the mostly present host of our system, still the same ol Larry Da' Cat! you all remember, just rebranded!

i'm also gay as fuck and an ex mormon (ex cult) now, also it's been literal fucking yearsa So any and ALL past drama is no longer relevant to who we are or what we believe in. B)

(you can ask questions about the past drama if your intentions are genuine but I can't garuntee we'll respond to them but it's a possibility)

With that being said. Here are the headmates that will probably be interacting with this post the most

Luna Dreamscaper (me) • she/they • host • (no sign off usually except for 🌙)

Johnny Ghost • he/they • brother • 🔦

Frank • he/they/she • brother/co-host • ⚠️

Jimmy • he • shows up sometimes • 🦐/⚰️

Hunter • he/them • brother/friend • 🐦‍🔥/⚜️

yes we have a Johnny Toast, no he is not dating Johnny Ghost. (please do not ask headmate/alters if they're dating just to live your shipping fantasies. no one likes it and also it's weird/lh)

no they aren't my literal brothers but found family bc we can do that lol 😭🙏

it's an 80% chance that you'll mostly get Luna (me) tho lol.

we are not comfortable with people asking to talk to specific headmates but I can grab their opinions on things... maybe.

remember that we are people and not fictional characters lol 💜🩵💙🖤

assholes get thrown into the sun -🔦

We are bodily 22! Headmates ages range from 18-22 as well.

Things we will post about:

Mostly VenturianTale but expect other things like Supernatural, Smosh, OCs, Strive SMP & Crow SMP (smps we're in), vents and rants?, stuff about plurality (mostly our own experiences tbh) and other stuff i like.

and we reblog a lot. because that's what tumblr is for😭🙏

we also call our VentrianTale PIE focused au "Shatterverse." B)

@pie-resurgence is our alt about more of our p.i.e. lore and related projects!

I love P.I.E. so much and the VT world and it's lore, we love receiving Asks about the topics!

also please reblog our art! we would appreciate that so much! 😭🙏

(post is long af but here's more info down below) 👇

the basic DNI's should obvious but here is a few specifics that we won't engage in:

endos make us nervous due to bad experiences so we will not interact.

this is very specific and targeted but i dont care: people who think they're their source. and actively brag that you did the terrible things that source character has done. we'll just block you lol.

we don't hate this ship or mind people who ship it but please don't ping us in anything Ghost x Toast or Jimmy x Gavin related. (also bad experiences. also makes headmates uncomfortable lol 😔✊)

Speaking of ships. anyone who comes to us complaining about what we do indulged in will get thrown into a Volcano. (Blocked.) unless it's actually problematic, stfu lol.

don't be weird/passive aggressive/mean towards mine, friends VT headcanons. VenturianTale was written badly let people do what they want. Unless it's problematic as shit. stfu pt 2

Please go to Google/do research about systems, DID, OSDD and general Plurality. (the only questions about systemhood we'll answer is how we interpret Johnny Ghost/Jimmy's plurality, or any other plural-coded characters)

Jordan and Isaac Frye supporters dni. see this post.

trying to bring back old dusty ass drama will not be tolerated lol (this probably won't happen but it's happened before because people are cringe

also mormons dni. yall got me fucked up lol

Okay that's it. for now. Thank you for reading this through.

[nyx0090]

Sweetbitter: Golden Ice

Sweetbitter [Jake x Reader/OC]

Word Count: 11.053 (and pretty proud of it).

TW: +18, smut, unprotected sex, creampie, oral sex (f recieving), soft!Jake. Use of Y/N. Fem!Reader.

A/n: I think I made Jake's character more soft than actually intended but I like him like this too. I'm very proud of this work even if some parts don't exactly convince me bc it's the first work I manage to finish in years so.

It is edited but if still there are mistakes please excuse them. I hope you'll like it.

Spotify Playlist some of the songs are actually in the series and some, I think, fit the vibes of the series. These inspired this whole fic so if someone wants to listen to them while reading feel free.

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At a certain point every night seems the same: get changed, get the food, smile and be polite, change again and go home. But sometimes this normality, this routine, helps especially having lived many years running around cause mom and dad always had to get transferred for work and I never got to settle as I wanted. Never had friends that lasted more than a couple of weeks, maybe a month before I never heard from them again. Not being able to find secret spots or hang out with people my age, I was always present at important events and meeting.

“This is going to be useful for your future, you’ll have time for friends, maybe” this is what mom and dad always told me.

Stability is what I always longed for and now I got it, sometimes it's boring and sometimes it simply reminds me that this is what I wanted after running left and right in all America. After not being able to actually know someone.

To keep things interesting, I sang at a place, a wonderful jazz bar, the Golden Ice, once in a while, when they needed. I sang there all night, got a few free drinks, got changed and went back home. Getting away from the drama at the restaurant because I felt that the more I stayed away, the better.

Tonight was no different. I had to work at the restaurant and then grab my things and go sing for a while in a place that seemed a completely different world, and it kind of was compared to Home Bar. Or the restaurant.

I only had one problem, that little problem being a 5'9-man, black hair and many tattoos. Jake got "interest" (if it can be called that seeing who Jake is), apparently, in following me some nights when he probably was bored, had no one to get laid with and didn't want to Home Bar.

As if I wouldn’t notice.

I did not know the reason but all I knew is that his timing in ‘stalking’ was annoyingly impeccable. I mean I only went to two places: the jazz bar and a sort of library open 24/7 in which you enter only with a pass that is given to clients who are interested, grab a book and then decide if you stay there or want to go home. It’s like being in an office but you get to read and have a good time. And Jake always, always managed to follow me when I went to the bar.

Tonight, I had to sing right after the shift at the restaurant and had to fly there almost. And I knew, knowing my luck, that he would have followed me. Maybe I was being too sneaky and that just piqued his curiosity. All I knew was that he was annoying at how well he picked the nights I wanted to keep most secret.

I didn't want anyone at the restaurant to know about me singing. Don’t get me wrong it’s not because its them: I love that group of crazy coworkers I have but I considered it nothing special and I preferred no one to know anyway. That included Jake.

《So... how is the night going?》 Jake asked, cleaning a few glasses and starting drinks.

《As always: many clients, some bullshit and I can't wait to go home.》 I answered opening bottles and replacing some caps for Nicky and him to use later.

He shrugged and a small smirk lifted his lips.

《What about yours?》 I said in return placing the bottles back where they should be.

《Nothing much either. Will you come to Home Bar later?》 he suddenly asked.

《No, I'll just go home. I want to lay down and sleep so bad.》 I yawned to get the point across and hope he would go to Home Bar and not follow me.

He nodded before going back to prepare some drinks while I finished up the bottles.

Once finished I went to get some ice seeing they were running low on it. While I was getting that I already planned the path I had to walk to the bar and pick the one that would have a bar allow me to go out the back and get rid of Jake.

I went back upstairs and left the ice to Jake before going to the kitchen and go on with the same routine, bringing plates and being polite.

Jake's eyes kept following me through the night. I kind of understood what he wanted from me: he wanted a good fuck. Just like he did with everyone else. But I was not willing to give that. He might be handsome and attractive, but a pretty face was not enough for me.

Talking might have gotten him more far, but he didn't seem the type.

I didn't mind the ‘friendship’ we developed tho: joking, teasing sometimes and helping each other. Talking a bit during shifts and passing some alcohol under the table. Terrible jokes and playful insults. I liked that, it felt right for us.

At the end of the night, I changed in the outfit I would have worn to the jazz bar and covered it with my long black coat. October temperatures did not forgive already, and it was the perfect excuse. Once I was all covered up and ready to go, I headed downstairs.

《Bye guys! Have fun at Home Bar!》 I chirped, waving my way to the door.

《You're not coming with us? Come on!》 Ari said, already a bit tipsy as always.

《Sorry dear, I'm super tired tonight and don't have the right outfit anyway.》 I answered going up to her and hugging her.

Then I was off. After a few blocks I heard Jake following me.

'Perfect. Absolutely fucking perfect. How does he have such timing?' I thought. I started to walk faster towards my only saving way out of here.

When I entered the chaotic bar I spotted a dear friend of mine, Michelle, and she brought me to the back door without questions.

Jake could not follow me to the back from inside the bar and even if he got outside, he would have lost some time before catching up, giving me time to slip away to work.

As I went, I kept thinking how to approach him about it. It would be fun to see his face when I would ask why does he follow me. I smiled to myself before turning into an alley and going in through the back.

《There you are! I was worried something happened to you!》 came Ambra, a sweet 30 years old small woman, hugging me and cupping my face in her hands turning it left and right before hugging me again. She would have sung with me tonight as many other nights and she was already almost finished with her outfit and make-up.

《Had to get rid of my little friend.》 I shrugged as we went to my changing room to get make-up on.

《Why don't you just tell him if he seems so interested?》 Ambra questioned as I sat down in the chair.

《Cause I don't want people at work to know. I don't have to tell them anything - I defended – and besides he could just ask me instead of following me around like a creep.》 I concluded and closed my eyes as she applied my eye make-up. Then she went away to get the last things ready too and I finished by myself. Some time was saved having worn my dress before.

I wore another pair of shoes and just went off to the stage.

When we started to sing the small crowd of the bar started to cheer and we started to just have fun too. I was always a little nervous before a performance, no matter how many times I did it. And to be able to sing along side Ambra whom had the most beautiful voice was always a pleasure and an honor.

She was way more experienced than me for sure and yet never looked down on me for it. She was like a second mom to me or a big sister.

When the night was finished, and I got changed in a more comfortable outfit I went to the bar to bid goodnight to everyone and found my usual drink waiting for me as a thank you from the owner who work as a bartender there.

《Thank you Rick!》 I called out. He gave me a thumbs up as a response before finishing up with cleaning. When I was done, I got my things, said goodbye again and went home.

I got to a bus stop and waited for mine. While waiting and to make the time pass a bit faster, I put on my old earphones.

Soon the bright lights of the bus announced its arrival, I hopped on, ready for a pretty long ride. Usually from the restaurant I could go home walking, it was a bit long, but I could manage. From here was straight off too long and I did not had the energy.

.

The next day went pretty well. Running errands in the morning, taking a good long bath and then getting ready to work as always.

When I came in Jake was almost finished changing and I started to take off my jacket. I could see a mile away he wanted to ask me something, continuously looking behind his shoulder. But he couldn’t, I didn’t know nothing for him, and I said I always went home after work so what would there be to ask?

I had to stifle a giggle at how frustrated he looked when he went out. To go this much just so he could get laid seemed a bit much even for him. There were plenty of girls who he could hook up with.

‘Maybe he was just bored.’

I shrugged it off before finishing up and getting out. Luckly tonight I did not have to go anywhere so a good book and a cozy tea at home were awaiting me. Or maybe I could join humanity and go to Home Bar with the others.

I helped with putting down the tables, getting some saltshakers and the flowers watered to be sure they looked fresher.

Then the restaurant opened, and I got the coats to put away. It was probably the most relaxing task because it was a quiet space, but it always lasted way too little.

《Hey could you back up?》 Tess asked me, three plates already in hand. I immediately went to her and helped bringing the plates to the table.

《Have I seen you somewhere?》 one of the man at the table asked looking at me. Of course, he knew me being a fucking regular at the other bar.

'Could one thing go right?'

《I'm afraid you are mistaking me for someone else, sir.》 I politely answered, Tess eyes scrutinizing me.

I just kept looking at the men and when the silence became too long, I added 《Very well, enjoy your meal!》

We went away from the table. I had no time for this tonight, and I knew Tess was going to ask questions.

We weren't even into the kitchen when she started bombarding me

《Are you sure he was wrong or just didn't want to tell in front of me?》 she teased.

《No Tess, I don't know him. It must have been a genuine mistake.》 I said stopping at the bar and asking for a shot of rum.

《Oh, come on! He is pretty handsome too. What are you hiding?》 she kept teasing as I chugged down the liquid to get the edge off. It was going to be a stressful night then.

《Nothing Tess, I seriously don't know him! Never seen him in my life.》 I said getting back to work. Jake was nowhere to be found. Better.

In no time the whole kitchen and not knew about this slip up and I was done for. Everyone kept asking questions.

《He seems good for you. You know there is nothing bad with it right? You can tell us.》 Ari teased and Heather agreed.

《What you bitches talking about?》 came in Sasha who, extraordinarily, still did not know.

《Y/N's new man at table 14.》 Ari said with a smirk.

《Oh, my God. He is not my man, ok? I don't know him! He just has mistaken me for someone else!》

I said on the verge of asking the third or fourth rum of the night. And we were only halfway through the shift. A hand went down my face, exhausted.

Maybe no humanity or Home Bar tonight.

When I went out of the kitchen, I spotted Nicky and asked another shot of rum.

《You sure you're okay?》 he asked a bit worried about my alcohol consumption tonight. Usually I went to one, two shots three if it was a rough night but almost coming up to four or five was new for him.

《Yeah, simply everyone being absolutely exhausting about a man who mistook me for someone else.》 I answered 'honestly' drinking fast before Howard could catch me.

Right at that time the table I helped Tess earlier started to get up and towards us, giving me the number for the coat closet.

《Are you sure we haven't met before?》 he asked one more time taking his coat from my hands and wearing it.

《Absolutely positive sir.》 I said with a smile.

When they were gone, and I turned around Jake was watching me.

I wanted to crash my head in the nearest wall, now he is not going to let me be, ever.

《Do you know him?》 he asked as he cleaned some more glasses.

《Nope, never seen him. He got a crab thinking I was someone he knew.》

And with that I went away back to the kitchen. He kept boring holes for the rest of the night into my back and I was this close to punch him in the face.

Definitely no humanity or Home Bar.

‘Fuck it, I'm going home to tea and books.’

I thought as I got changed, fighting with the last three buttons of my shirt with my trembling hands.

《Oh, Lord》 I groaned still trying. ‘Why, why did I drink so much?’  At the end I managed to drink around seven shots. I was not drunk but definitely tipsy if I could not undo three damn buttons. I gave up and went to the small sink to splash a bit of water on my face to freshen up. It kind of worked, my hands were still trembling but at least I got out of my stirpes.

When I finished changing, Jake entered the room. I said nothing and went out with my much more comfortable long skirt and blouse on and my bag and coat in hand.

《I’m going home, bye guys.》 I announced near the door not getting anything anymore to drink. A chorus of ‘bye’s’ went with me out the door. I put on my long black, comfy coat and I was off to the library.

I took out my pass key at the door, swiped it and went in. I took a deep breath enjoy the smell of books and some aromatic candle still lingering after a whole day of burning.

The relaxing music underneath was very nice and helped get cozy. I went with some old novel, The Picture of Dorian Grey. I’ve read it many times now, but it was not the night to engage in some new reading, not with this much alcohol in me and so little concentration.

.

When I got up to go home and bring the book with me it was around 2 am so I called it a day. I left a little note for Martina for the next morning and went off. It was starting to really get cold in New York, so I wore my coat and made my way through an enormous crowd of people for it to be 2 am and somewhere I got a glimpse of Jake.

‘Nah, I must be wrong. I need to sleep’ but when I looked again there he was.

I tried my best to look away fast and concentrate to the task at hand – going home – as much as I could so he would not notice me but right at that time he turned around and made eye contact with me.

Now, he definitely saw me there.

‘Oh Lord. Really?’ I just ignored him and went on to my house to get that sleep I needed after maybe a few more chapters.

.

Needless to say, it was not a few more chapters. I finished the book and when I placed it on the side my alarm read 5.30 in the morning, and it should have went off at 7.

With a big headache I got up at 2 pm and got done what I could before taking a much-needed shower and preparing for work.

Once there I greeted everyone before going to the locker room and sitting on the sofa not before wetting my handkerchief and placing it over my eyes.

‘Damn headache. Never again am I reading that late or drinking that much.’

《Are you dead or what?》 Jake asked.

《For now I just am.》 I answered tiredly, my headache was not going to give me peace for the whole night.

I jolted when he closed his locker went away. I took off the wet thing from my eyes and changed too.

《Why were you out so late last night?》 he asked as I was going through the flowers. I smiled, expecting that question. I turned around, placed my hands on the counter separating us and looked him dead in the eyes.

《Why did you followed me like a creep two nights ago? And many nights before that too?》 he was stunned to say the least, his mouth hanging open like a fish. I took my mop bar and went away.

For the rest of the night we didn’t talk, just said coworker things. ‘We are running low on ice’, ‘Could you bring up a bottle Riesling’ and stuff like that.

At least he didn’t have that stupid grin on tonight, I, on the other hand, smiled like an idiot all night for this little success.

.

《You coming to Home Bar tonight?》 Heather asked as I sat down to take a Negroni. I looked down at my outfit – the

usual long skirt with a sweater this time – and back up at her.

《Don’t think I’m dressed appropriately for Home Bar but sure, why not?》 I said and cheers raised.

《Boring white woman is coming with us tonight.》 Sasha added above the chaos. I laughed, looking at them getting up and I chugged down what was left of my drink.

《It’s incredible how you never once skip asking me to come with you. Am I really that boring for your standards?》 I playfully inquired. Ari placed an arm around my shoulders, thinking about it.

《Maybe – she concluded – I mean you are probably super fun but we have never seen that side of you.》 she added.

《That hurt my feeling - I answered feigning hurt - when have I ever gave you guys the impression I'm not fun.》 I said. Ari and Heather looked at me up and down before answering.

《By the way you dress, for example.》 they said together.

《It's comfortable, you should try it.》 I retorted playfully.

《You never come to Home Bar or any other party, during shifts drink you take always the same thing and then you are off to sleep. Not even my grandma is that boring.》 Ari kept going on, the amused tone telling me she didn't mind one bit.

《Wow - I said - well I prefer I glass of wine at home rather than get waisted every night.》 I retorted again.

When we reached Home Bar everyone scattered everywhere: to dance, to drink, to do drugs and to fuck. I went to the bartender and asked again for a Negroni and a bottle of water. I got that to the table where Jake and Will were sitting and also Heather, but she got up and went away a couple of minutes prior.

I took a seat and started to drink looking at people dancing, drinking, making out, many probably high on drugs or drunk but they looked like they were enjoying themselves, a lot.

《I'm going to the bathroom.》 Will announced.

An awkward silence settled between me and Jake.

《Are you not asking me anymore questions now?》 I said still not looking at him. He kept silent so I turned around and looked at him.

《How did you find me out?》 he asked with confidence.

《Well it was very easy actually and if you are a stalker in your free time let me tell you: you suck, a lot. Change hobby, really.》 I said playfully. A small chuckle left his lips, and my eyes fell there for a second before going back to anywhere in the room.

《Why did you follow me tho? You could have asked instead of being a creep and scared the shit out of me the first time. I was about to call the police.》 I told him, more seriously this time.

《I got curious. Why did you never come with us to Home Bar or parties? Why you never stayed more than needed during shift drinks?》 he said. I looked at him not entirely convinced.

《Are you sure you simply weren't bored and decided to do something stupid?》 I offered. I was not really buying the curiosity thing. Knowing Jake there could have been a thousands more reasons but this one was the less convincing.

He shrugged looking around a bit too before asking again 《Would you have let me come with you if I asked?》 completely ignoring my question.

《No.》

《Why not?》

《What I do after work doesn't necessarily have to be your or anyone else's business. I can keep private some things.》 I snapped at him a bit.

《So you did know that man.》 he inquired. I looked at him shocked. If I didn't punch him tonight I would never again even try.

《Is this what all of this is about?》 I asked skeptically.

He didn't answer and I took a sip of my drink.

《Will you ever bring me with you where ever it is you go?》 he asked again.

《I don't understand why are you so curious. What if I do a simple second job as a waitress? There is nothing interesting about it.》 I said.

《You didn't answer my question.》 I looked at him up and down and remained silent. He says that? After all he deliberately didn't answer to me?

《From whom this comes - I retorted keeping the glass near my lips - and maybe. I don't take strangers around with me like it's nothing.》 I offered sincerely. He simply nodded. Sometime after Will came back from wherever he actually went, and I went to bid goodnight to all those I could find and headed back home hoping for the best.

.

For the next few days, we still talked very little. After that the ice started to crack and we started to talk a bit more, I went once more to Home Bar and we had fun talking and assuming about the people around us.

I had some more nights at Rick’s, and he didn’t follow which I took as a success.

《So, how are you doing?》 I asked him one night before the opening time while I was putting away glasses and bottles.

《I should be the one asking you.》 he answered cleaning some shakers and strainers.

I eyed him suspiciously, not understanding if it was an insult of some sorts.

《Have you slept one hour in… I don’t know, a week? You look like a panda.》 he answered not looking at me.

I was behind some hours of sleep having done some more shifts and staying up late more nights than I should have

reading but I didn’t think it showed that much.

《Oh. I thought I covered it enough.》 I whispered more to myself than him and he didn’t say anything else.

He didn't say anything after that.

During the shift I was a bit like a zombie, but I managed taking a pause when I felt on the verge of sleeping where I was standing. Like now, I was wetting my handkerchief to pass it on my face in hope it would wake me up when a locker was closed behind me and I jumped on the spot. When I turned around, I saw Jake and Simone.

《Are you alright?》 the blonde asked me.

《Yes, yes I'm fine. Running low on sleep.》 I said showing her the wet little thing in my hands. I went to sit down and placed it on my forehead and eyes.

《Could one of you stay here with me? I need just five minutes but wouldn't want to actually fall asleep.》 I asked hoping one of them could stay.

《Yes, of course.》 Simone answered me. I sighed and relaxed on the couch. Right when I did that, I felt sleep clawing my mind and body.

‘Yep, tonight no reading, no nothing. Just sleep.’

At a certain point someone lifted the wet cloth off my eyes, and I whined at the low light disturbing me. A whine left my lips as I tried to place it back down.

《Come on, you said five minutes and they are up.》 a deep voice talked from beside me. I cracked an eye open and scoffed, getting up and going to the sink to wash my face.

 《Are you sure you can keep going for three more hours like this?》 he asked looking at me and getting up too.

《I've been through it all this time, might as well finish it. Three hours are nothing really.》 I said. It would have been three more hours, but they will be done sooner that I can count so no need to get cut now.

《Everyone is tired, that does not entitle me to nothing. Besides I'm the reason for my own sleepiness so, no one to blame but oneself.》I added, sighing and squeezing the wet cloth before placing it in my locker to try and dry it off.

I took a deep breath before turning around and going off with Jake on my heel.

.

As expected, the three hours went on slow but not unbearably so and when I got finally changed, I flew out the restaurant bidding a quick goodnight.

When my apartment lock clicked behind me, I went immediately to the shower, taking a very quick one, and just went to bed. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was sound asleep.

The next day I woke up very late probably around 12, didn’t really looked at the clock and wandered around my apartment for my kitchen and some water. Decided to put on some music to wake up a bit and get some chores done before getting a better shower than last night and preparing for work. Tonight, I was excited since after it I had my day off and could not wait for it. I would be staying at home, or I would have gone to the library while the night I was going to Rick’s bar to talk a bit and see if he had some plans for me already for the next few weeks.

So, I spent the few hours I had left putting away some book and decided to make a run to the library to give back some books I had stacked at home for a while and that I finished.

《And this is the last one.》 I said to Martina with an apologetic tone. In total I had to return 20 books and when she saw me with a full bag, she was definitely not ready for this.

《Thank God. I thought they would never finish.》 she said sighing then placed the book in a basket behind her giving me the possibility to admire her beautiful ginger locks cascading on her back. She was a young girl, like me and she was breathtakingly beautiful, her mind sharp as a razor and sly as a fox. She was a great friend I made not too long after coming to New York.

《Sorry, been coming in mostly during the night.》 I explained to her folding my bag and placing it into another one.

《No wonder you look like shit.》 Ah, always so honest.

《Not the first time I hear it this week.》 I answered ready to go off to the restaurant.

《Must be true then. But seriously, take care.》 she said at the end.

《Will try. You too.》 I said and went off.

.

Right outside the restaurant Sasha and Ari were smoking something and offered me too, to which I declined. Ari scoffed and rolled her eyes while Sasha kept smoking, minding his businesses.

I then entered and went to change. As always, I gave a look at the flowers and rearranged them a bit if needed.

As always, it was a pretty good night, not many assholes, a lot of tips. Me and Jake talked a bit, joked and had our fun.  Until a client decided to be very rude with me and Heather, in front of Howard. I kept my mouth shut as tightly as I could knowing he would have taken care of everything when he sent me and Heather back to kitchen.

《I have no words! Did you hear what he said to us? In front of Howard no less – exclaimed her. I looked at her and just went on with my work. – Are not gonna say anything?》

《I’m trying to say nothing cause if I start I’m going out of here and kicking that idiot out myself.》 I answered. To be that stupid and not be able to see it by yourself it’s embarrassing. I took a deep breath and just went on with the night, we hadn’t much more, and I wanted to finish.

Now everything was going bad: the way I got down the steps, the song that was on, the way someone called me over for something. I felt on edge and a bath was going to remedy that a bit, I hoped.

As soon as the shift ended, I got changed at light speed, bid goodnight to who was there and went home. I almost didn’t even take off my shoes before going to the bathroom and start the water.

The steam raising and filling the bathroom was calming by itself. When I got in, I melted and for a second, I thought I would fallen asleep in there. In my mind popped up again the idiot of tonight and it was so disrespectful, I’m happy Howard was there and dealt with everything because that was simply unacceptable.

I shrugged it off and didn’t let it ruin my hot bath.

Then it was time for bed, so I got out of the tub, applied my skincare and went to bed without much else, just wanted to sleep it off.

- Three Months Later -

I liked so much winter in New York. It was cold and allowed me to wear longer skirts and my heavy black coat and I felt amazing wearing those.

In the past few weeks, me and Jake talked a lot, we hanged out. Not much, really, just a coffee here and there, going for breakfast or the shitty diners he loved so much.

After that I thought a lot, pondering on if I should have brought him with me to Rick’s.

It was clear that his invitations were made to not be a stranger anymore and even if I just scratched the surface. Then I decided I would have brought him along.

Hence why I wrote the bar name and the address to the bar in the morning, looking at that piece of paper and giving it my very last thoughts. I still had time since he knew nothing. He really tried and I saw that even if he came along it would not have been so bad. When it was time to go out, I took that little note I put extra care in writing for some silly motive and went to the restaurant.

I got changed quickly and placed the note in the pocket of my pants. I would have given that to him at some point of the shift or before going home.

‘Maybe.’

《Don’t make me regret this. 》I whispered to him as I handed the small piece of paper. He looked intrigued and just slipped it in his pocket, a smirk on his face. I rolled my eyes and went on with work, feeling vaguely nervous. It was the first time ever someone heard me sing, well, someone I knew. At home my family knew of this, and I always liked to sing for them but here in New York I had no one close to me to that point and so no one knew. Only Howard because sometimes I needed to go out early and he had to know, so it was for strictly professional reasons.

When I got changed into the outfit for the night to save time when I could my hands were a bit sweaty.

‘Oh, come on. I sing in front of so many people every night and I’m getting nervous about a pretty boy. This is ridiculous.’

《Good night everyone!》 I said taking my shot of rum fast since I already had my coat on and closed. 

《Night!》 everyone shouted as I got out. I went out fast no seeing Jake.

‘I mean maybe he would not have come.’

I stopped for a second thinking about the fact that he could already have something else to do or simply did not accept my invitation. So, I was getting nervous for nothing. It left a slightly bitter taste on my tongue after all the hanging out for him to not come.

I shrugged it off. It was silly, was it not me this morning who still had doubts about asking him? It’s only fair if he doesn’t come.

I started to walk since I had not time to lose. After a few blocks I noticed someone following me and a silly smile made its way on my face. I stopped to let him catch up to me.

《I already informed you how you are absolutely shit in stalking right?》 I asked in a playful tone.

《Well this time I have an invitation.》 he said smirking, waiving into my face the same note I gave him a couple of hours ago.

《And didn’t I say to not make me regret it?》 I said glaring at him. I took advantage to check how he was dressed: he had a nice white shirt on, no tie, with the first couple of button undone. Black pants and a nice pair of shoes.

《You did not came in tonight dressed like this. Where did you get these clothes?》 I asked while looking at the red light waiting for it to turn green and also at the display of my phone to be sure I was on time.

《Kept them in the locker hoping you would invite me.》 he answered honestly and at that moment the light turned green not giving me the possibility to look at him as all the people started to move, pushing me into doing the same.

Soon enough, we were at the bar. He went in from the front and I got in from the back. As soon as the door of our changing room closed the warm voice of Ambra accompanied me, asking me how work was.

《Good. We have a special guest tonight.》 I said while applying mascara.

She stopped everything she was doing and turned to look at me since special guest might have meat anything really.

When I didn’t turn around to look at her and simply went on its like something clicked.

《Is it the boy?》 she asked, gasping excitedly.

《It is him.》 I answered happy to see her this exited. She squealed like a puppy toy and went into hugging me and jumping around.

《You know I just invited him here to hear me sing right? Nothing else.》 I told her applying the blush and going to grab my lipstick. She looked at me up and down, stopping her celebration all together.

《Famous last words.》 she coughed before going to sit back down. I rolled my eyes and gave her that finishing upvmy make up and ccurling my hair before putting them up. When I went to get up and went to the door, she stopped me.

《Oh no, no, no. You are not wearing that. – she said looking at my dress. It was old and worn out, the rich brown color a bit faded and I used it since I started to work here. It was a piece of my mum I always kept with me, but I also understood it looked like its age – I have the perfect dress for you.》 she said going through her own wardrobe to take out a deep purple dress. It had a layer of black at the end of the skirt were the rich purple silk-like fabric turned chiffon. And it added a lot of dimension. It was a bit longer than my usual dress, this one practically at the floor. The back was cut very low, no straps and a bold neckline too. I undid my hair leaving them down and moving the line to one side, letting them brush behind my back and all over one of my shoulder, the other one free.

《It’s a while I wanted to give you this dress. After a couple of kids my body has definitely changed, and I gained some weight too – she added with a giggle. She was still slaying, and she knew – so I’m giving it to you. I wouldn’t fit into it anymore even if I tired.》 she reassured me even before I spoke.

《Are you sure? It’s so beautiful. I mean you could get it fitted.》 I kept looking at the mirror absolutely mesmerized by the sight of myself: I looked absolutely beautiful.

《It would cost me more than buying another dress. Beside that was never really my color anyway.》 she said finishing herself up too. She was wearing a black dress with some blue accents, her short black hair curled, framing her sweet face.

And then we were off to the stage to sing.

The sweet, beautiful notes of Wake Up Alone started to play introduced by Ambra. Then I took on. We kept on switching during the song, the ladies doing the back voices doing a great job as always.

We sang for the whole night while I tried to spot Jake in the bar and not finding him. Disappointment made its way in me and took a hold of my heart, but I tried to not think about it. I was beautiful, the night was beautiful and I was singing. Nothing else counted right now.

When we were done with the live singing, I felt light so me and Ambra went laughing at the bar and asked Rick for something to drink. Ambra was telling me something, but I was only half listening, looking for Jake around the place.

《Good evening.》 Jakes voice called from behind us. We both turned around, and I looked at him, honestly a bit surprised he was still here since I could not make him out in the small, crowded place.

《Hey. – I could feel Ambra shift beside me wanting to say something but refraining – so, what do you think? As interesting as you thought it would be?》 I asked while leaning back a bit on the counter behind me, taking a sip of my drink. He took a small step forward, checking me out.

《I understand why you never said this to anybody, for sure – he answered – and if I have to be honest it’s more interesting than I expected.》 he concluded.

《I’m happy you liked it. It goes without saying that I would prefer if this stayed between me and you, yes?》 I told him finishing my drink. He simply nodded looking around, absorbing the place.

《In how much does your shift ends?》 he raised him voice a bit, the music starting now a bit loud to talk normally.

《Not much more actually but before – I said getting up and turning to Ambra, offering her a dance – I promised this beautiful lady a dance. If it gets too late or you get bored feel free to go home whenever you want.》 I told him. Then a silly smile was on my face as Ambra followed me hand in hand in the crowd to dance a bit.

《Is that him?》 she exclaimed. I nodded and spun her around.

《Girl. That is a fine young man over there.》 she said and I agreed with her. Jake was handsome for sure, and he did show interest in this 《I hope he will not get distant now that he knows.》 I sighed. She gave me a smile and a few pats on my back. Then we had to hop back on stage for a bit more live singing.

《Thank you as always ladies. Great night tonight too.》 Rick complimented as me and Ambra went to say goodbye.

《Thank you too Rick. It’s a pleasure to sing in such a place.》 Ambra said and I agreed. After that we bid our goodnights and went out.

Jake was waiting for me outside and when Ambra spotted him she elbowed me not so delicately to which I glared at her and she looked at me apologetically, giving me a big hug and winking at me. I sighed at that and said bye to her too.

《You have a great voice by the way.》 he said at a certain point while we were walking.

《Thank you. Been singing since I was a child, so I brought that with me. Something familiar to rely on – I confessed to him – and where exactly are we going?》 I asked noticing we were going back to the restaurant.

《Home?》 he obviously stated.

《No shit Sherlock, I’m going to mine and you to yours.》 I stated. Once we were in front of it, we stopped.

《Goodnight then.》 he said. I nodded and bid him goodnight one last time. I turned around and took a few steps before turning back again to look at him skeptically to which he looked at me confused.

《Are you going to follow me?》 I asked. He simply smirked saying 《I’ll keep you on your toes.》 turning around and walking away.

A confused smile made its way on my face and after a second, I walked away back home.

.

Since that night me and Jake became even more close. We started hanging out even more, going to places that meant more for both of us, talking a bit of ourselves, not much, especially him but he tried. He just needed someone to talk to, he needed to be listened, and I just did that.

One night he took me to a bar he loved, pretty secluded and that didn’t have a lot of people, but the atmosphere was nice and calming. The place was beautiful too: an old bar that had a very French style in dark colors and a lot of wood, its smell still lingering in the air along with other sweet scents and faint alcohol. The drinks were amazing, and we had a great time talking about our interests, what we liked and what we didn’t like. The books we read, the artists we admire and our favorite drinks while we were there. Then he accompanied me back home where we parted.

In return, and since we both liked to read a lot from what I gathered, I showed him the library. We went there after a rough night and took a book each, sitting down while I made some tea for the both of us and started reading, appreciating each other’s company. When it started to get very late, we took the books and went out talking about what we read these past hours.

Soon I realized that I didn’t mind passing my time with him and a bit later I accepted I was starting to have feelings for him. Once we used our day off to get a backpack to go to Cold Spring, a beautiful town I wanted to visit for a while, and it was not even that far from New York.

That morning, we took a train at 5, so early that it had very few people in it, granting silence to which both me and Jake fell asleep listening to music. The train ride was about an hour, so we didn’t get that much rest but was better than nothing.

We were both dressed comfortably, him with trousers and a sweater and I opted for a more appropriate outfit for walking lot too with a pair of pants and a jumper. I also choose a different coat than the one I wore in the city, opting for a knee-length dark grey one that kept me very warm. When we got off the first thing we did was to find a bar in which we could have breakfast.

The day was about going around as much as possible, so we visited the many churches and appreciated the beauty of them taking many photos, me with my sad phone camera while Jake had his camera with him and took most certainly much better photos than me.

《Will you send me the photos you took later?》 I asked while he was taking another. He nodded and we went on.

It was almost lunch time, so we looked for a parc that was not too crowded and then started to eat in silence. I loved the smell of nature and the bird singing.

While we were still in the town, we also went to a bookstore and grabbed a souvenir: I bought a couple of books, a notebook and a bookmark and he got only the books.

Then it was time to go to the lake. We took a long stroll in the small forest surrounding it and my mind went to much warmer weather where I could come here again and take a bath, or even rent an apartment for a couple of days to disconnect from the city. If he wanted, he could come too, a bit of company would not be that bad. The stroll took longer than anticipated and when we went back in town to look for a nice place to have dinner it was already dark even if it was only around 6 pm.

The temperature dropped drastically, and we opted for a place where we could stay as long as possible to get warm. Between a chat and a warm meal, it was already 9 so we decided to go for the last walk and look at some of the decorative light still hanging from Christmas celebrations.

The streets were more crowded than during the day, so Jake offered me his arm which I took happily, and we walked some more.

Soon it became colder and darker, so we choose to call it a day and go take the train. It was around 10:30 when we took our and we should have been back by midnight.

《Did you had fun today?》 I asked tiredly, yawning right after and getting comfortable in my seat.

《Yes it was very nice, and I took good pictures too.》 he answered going through said photos a bit.

《Mhm, I’m glad.》 I whispered before I dozed off but couldn’t fall asleep. I kept going from asleep to waking up a bit and look around to understand where we were from out of the window.

《Hey, we have to get off.》 a voice called, pulling my arm a bit to get me to wake up. I whined and got a bit more comfortable.

‘Not now that I finally fell asleep…’ another thug made me open my eyes to glare at the source to find Jake. A bit dizzy and confused I got up letting him lead the way, dragging me out with my hand in his.

When we got out of the train cold air surrounded me unexpectedly. I went right away to close my coat better.

Jake dragged me out the station and into the city. Sleep and dizziness didn’t let go of me and noticing it, he slowly walked me home even if I didn’t realize it until I was at my front door and he asked 《Where are your keys?》 to which I looked at him and opened my backpack, muscle memory of where I always put my keys when I had it kicking in.

Jake made me the favor of opening the door of my apartment for me and lightly pushing me in. I took off my coat slowly and then went for my shoes. When I finally got them off, I went for my bed and just let myself fall on it.

I adjusted my body to a more comfortable position and right when I was falling asleep, I heard the door of my apartment close softly.

.

The next morning, I woke up late. Yesterday was a long day even if I had a lot of fun and it’s been a while since I last made such a trip. When I went to the kitchen a small note was waiting for me on the table. I started to prepare a coffee and then took the small piece of paper.

I left your keys at the entrance.

-Jake

I folded it back and placed it in a stack of notes in my desk. After my coffee I took all the things I brought with me yesterday from the backpack and placed them back where they should be, loading the dishwasher and starting the washing machine.

With some music in the background, I started to read a book, the one I got that night with Jake at the library. The ones I bought yesterday must wait until I finish this one.

And so, between music and books, it was time to go back to work.

《I heard you went out of city yesterday?》 Simone told me while I changed.

《Mm? Oh yeah, wanted to go out of New York for a while now and yesterday was the perfect day to do so.》 I answered nonchalantly, wearing my pants.

A long pause stretched between us. I had nothing else to say really so I just kept quiet but apparently, she wanted to press on.

《And did you went alone?》

《Simone – I called her out with a flat tone – if you already know I did not went alone don’t ask and if it bothers you just tell me.》 I said, buttoning up my stripes.

《It doesn’t bother me, was just asking.》 she replied.

 I didn’t understand what the point was if the first thing Jake did was run to her and tell her everything. I liked Simone as long as she didn’t put her nose in my business which happened more often now that me and Jake were hanging out.

And I didn’t like that. But she seemed off, been like this for a while now.

I closed my locker and went out, right in that moment Jake was coming up and I gave him a small smile.

《Thank you for the keys. And the note.》

《No problem.》

And I was off.

The night went on well as expected. It was like I never got a day off and of course I was updated on all the latest gossip by Ari and Sasha.

As always, we laughed a lot, and I felt like the restaurant was more wholesome. So tonight, I smiled more, I was more polite and even warmer with the guests. It felt a bit like home. And under certain lights it was.

.

《I don’t know why I prefer rum, okay? I just do.》 I said to Jake as I sat on the counter with the drink he just did in hand.

《There has to be some sort of reason. It’s like a drink: you have reasons of why you prefer a certain drink rather than another.》 he said as he poured his own drink.

《Ah! That is not true, in a drink you mix different flavors, so the alcohol is blended in them.》 I corrected him taking a sip of my very well done Negroni. He shrugged and started to drink his own, leaning on the counter next to me.

A long, comfortable silence stretched on as I listened to the music in the background and just swung my feet to the bits of an ending song. When the first notes of Koop Island Blues started, I drank a bit more before getting up and dragging Jake with me.

《Don’t care if you don’t dance. You do now.》 I said taking his hand and placing it on my waist while I placed mine on his shoulder. He smirked before pulling me closer and I felt my cheeks grow warm, butterflies raising in my stomach. And then we started dancing slowly to the song. I looked at him in the eyes for the whole time and I got lost in them. Maybe it was the drink, maybe the nice night at work, maybe something else but for a bit everything disappeared, it was just me and him, dancing and drinking. And it felt good, dreamy. In my life I’ve never felt this close with someone else.

I had nights that felt like a dream, friends by my side as we danced all night, but I never had experienced something so different and almost intimate by just looking at each other, fully clothed, dancing. And we were just dancing, that’s what made it so beautiful. He spun me a couple of times, and when I was back, he pulled me closer, just a bit, his hand going more to the center of my back, and butterflies would rise all over again. And I knew that it could be not right but at the same time it was okay. I cared for him deeply and I trusted him, hopefully he trusted me too. Sometime during the dance, I brought both my hands on his shoulders, and his hand found my waist. He caressed that part before hugging me, never stopping the dance. I hugged him too, sighing in content.

Then he pulled away, kissing my cheek and looking deeply into my eyes, getting slightly closer, his eyes slipping to my lips a few times.

When our mouths touched, we both melted in the contact. After a bit his hands took a hold of my hips before he lifted me to wrap my legs around his waist and walked towards the counter, placing me there so I could sit, never pulling away once. His hands went everywhere, my back, my legs covered by the long, light skirt, my arms and hands which he also kissed before going back to my mouth and deepening the kiss, pulling me impossibly close.

As he pulled away so we could both catch our breath I caressed the nape of his neck, keeping my eyes closed and just relishing in the moment.

A moan got caught in my throat when he kissed me again, slowly this time.

I felt myself becoming wet and hot when I felt his erection press up against me, a whine getting caught in his own throat. He lifted me up again, his mouth moving to my neck too 《Bedroom.》 he whispered in my ear before biting the skin on my neck.

《F-first on the left.》 I answered impatiently. He found it without any problem and before I knew I was laying in my bed while he looked down at me taking his shirt off and unbuckling his belt.

In a moment he was by my side, his pants still on, as he had me on his lap, taking my dress off, slowly sliding off the short sleeves. I was wearing nothing underneath because I was more comfortable like that around the house and I felt self-conscious, my hands going to cover up my chest and my legs closing for how much they could. Jake smiled at me and took my arms kissing them before bringing both over his shoulders and kissing my neck again, going lower this time. When he was at my breast he kissed them, took them in his hands, played with them until I was completely out of breath, running my fingers through his hair.

Before I could realize I was lying again in my bed, his lips on mine before going down again, kissing my neck, my shoulders, my breasts again, my stomach and then jumping to my thighs, starting from the knee before going up, biting softly the skin and sending shivers down my spine. I was panting when he kissed under my stomach again.

A gasp left me when he kissed my clit, licking a long, slow stripe from my entrance and up. His hands went to my hips in the attempt of hold me still.  

He unhurriedly increased the pace and when I looked down, he was already looking at me. I moaned before my hand went to his hair trying to steady myself from the pleasure. A low moan came from the back of his throat and my grip tightened.

《J-Jake… Jake, I- you-》 I stuttered but my point got across for he pulled me closer and dove deeper, making me arch my back and moan his name. Soon I came and he kept going through my high, licking me more sensually and sometimes kissing my thighs.

He returned his lips on mine and my neck before he undressed himself of his remaining clothes and kissed me again, lining himself up to my entrance.

《You sure?》 he asked out of breath, grinding himself on me and biting his lip to hold back a moan that came out as a broken gasp.

《Yeah.》 I answered pulling him close to me and kissing him again.

Then his cock sank into me, and I whined into his mouth, my hands pulling his hair. His hips stuttered and he went in too fast making me hold onto him tighter, gasping.

《Sorry.》 he whispered brokenly on my neck going in the last couple of inches left and staying still, waiting for me to adjust. He was definitely big, but the stretch was so good.

His hands caressed my sides while I played with his hair. He was breathing heavily and after a bit of waiting he started to grind into me to which I bit my lip but didn’t stop him. He tentatively pulled out a little only to sink back in, moaning in my ear.

《You feel amazing…》 he praised, his gruff voice making me shiver even before he started to actually move. Not fast, he deliberately pulled out almost all the way to just push in deeper every time.

His mouth kept alternating between biting and kissing lips and sucking on my neck and chest, his hands still on my sides.

He gave me one last kiss before adjusting our bodies so that he could stand up to end of the bed and bringing my legs on his shoulder pushing in hard.

My back arched and my hands gripped the sheets, a long moan leaving my lips. And then he did it again, and again

《Yes! R-right there Jake…》 and his pace went a bit faster, hitting a wonderful spot inside of me that made me see stars. One of his hands went to my collarbone, sliding down to my belly and pressing down.

His pace became more rough, more impatient, his thrusts more erratic and then he bended over me, leaving my legs on his sides to kiss me again.

《Fuck, fuck- you feel so good, so fucking good. C-can I come inside? Please, please, please- fuck. You’re squeezing me so tight… so good, you’re so good- fuck…》 he cursed into my neck. It took a bit for his words to register in my brain.

《C-can I?》 he asked again. And I nodded in a frenzy, feeling myself getting close again.

His fingers then went to rub on my clit while he watched my face contort in pleasure and my body shivering.

《Yes! Yes, please, come inside - you feel so good, so good…》 I moaned, in my mind only him and his body.

After a few more thrusts we both came undone. His arms sneaked around my back to hug me, and I did the same with my arms around his shoulders. His hips grinded a bit more in me before he pulled out. I closed my eyes, completely spent and tired but satisfied. After bit a towel met my thighs and pussy. When Jake cleaned himself too, he climbed on the bed by my side, got under the covers and hugged me, his head on my chest.

《Thank you…》 he whispered.

《Thank you too.》 I answered, kissing his head.

And fell asleep like that.

.

The next day the first thing I felt was Jake’s body pressed against my back, on hand on my hip and the other on my chest.

I took a deep breath before I relaxed in his hold, pressing myself better against him and relishing in the closeness some more.

When I turned in his embrace, I felt soreness in my whole body and a pleasurable ache between my legs. My arms hugged his naked torso, and I hid my head under his chin, giving his neck a few kisses.

It was a nice feeling, to not wake up alone like every day, wondering and thinking.

After I don’t know how much time I got up, leaving Jake in bed a bit more, and got a simple dress out of my wardrobe. It was a pale blue color, long until half my calves, and had thin straps to keep it on my shoulders. And then I was off to the kitchen to prepare some breakfast.

I decided to put on some music, keeping the volume low to not disturb Jake if he was still sleeping and got started. When I was placing down everything, I felt a pair of hands on my hips and smiled, finishing up the table.

《Morning.》 he whispered in my ear, kissing my neck and shoulders right after. His hands tracing up my sides until under my breasts.

《Good morning.》 I breathed out, leaning my head on his shoulder.

We stayed like this for a bit before we sat down to eat, a comfortable silence fell on us like a blanket and the music still on made for a nice murmur.

《You know… – Jake started as I was sipping on my coffee – I’m starting to cut things off with Simone.》 he confessed. I looked at him confused, what does that mean? Cutting things off with her? How? Why?

《We had been spending a lot of time together and I think it’s best like this… – he went on since I kept silent – also talking to you I started to understand a few things and I think Simone is not a good presence?》 he concluded a little bit more insecure this time. I kept looking at his waiting for him to continue but he didn’t.

《It’s not my place to say what you should do with the relationship you had and still have with her. Whatever it is, I’ll be there with you, okay? If you think she is not a good presence in your life anymore I’ll try to be by your side, as a friend or whatever. I’ll not substitute her.》 Never. I said choosing my words carefully. I offered him a hand that he took and squeezed to which I squeezed back reassuringly. I started to get up

《Come on now, we have to get ready.》

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A/n: Thanks to whoever made it to the end, I hope I didn't bore you too much and I would also like to disclaim that under this message there are going to be drawings I personally made for the story. Those are three outfits I very clearly imagined on her: the one when she goes to home bar, the one when she sings and Jake is there too, and the one she wears at the end when she is at home with Jake. If you don't like them please don't freely insult me or my art style.

P.s the aspect of the girls in the drawings are how I imagined the protagonist to look like. This is a Reader x Jake story, I omitted anything that had to do with Readers appearance for this reason, only what she wears is described.

Thanks, bye.