#^ bc that is the turmoil currently and she’s PANICKING …!!!! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

swordmaid · 3 months ago

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having shri’iia thoughts as one does bc GUESS who’s save file completely died when the new patch came out nooo we have to replay her again 🤭 alas. just stewing on the thought of how she never got to fuck her Mistress even though she wanted to…!!!! like she was out there getting psychologically tortured and mind broken but she was just like WHY won’t you fuck me im literally doing everything for you. which is so bad for her, woman who already has an excruciatingly low self worth because she missed the mark on the standard for lolth’s children (and that’s worse than not fitting in the standard at all) by something out of her own control btw (not being born in a noble house) but she’s been recognised and blessed by her goddess, and she’s been invited to join a drow house so everything should be good right?? she should be desirable right?? finally everything is correct and well and good and the way it should be right????? but no..!! it’s not..!! and so she’s doing everything for this woman, no dignity left, literally doing anything to get her approval, to be told that she’s finally enough, and she’s finally fitting in - and she gets it sometimes, she gets ignored most times tbh and it’s just this painful excruciating stew of self loathing and insecurity that she’s in, and she’s in there for a century but the thing is she can’t even give up. it’s not in her nature to. and she’s done too much to just give up , and she’s been doing this for a long time that she can’t give up and lolth didn’t raise no quitters so she sticks by it, trying to achieve that hopeless praise. but then one day she gets dropped like nothing, everything she’s done and suffered and worked towards and sacrificed gets thrown out bc her goddess isn’t pleased with her and good luck going home btw you’re not welcome here anymore bc ur pathetic. the rug gets pulled under her feet and she’s left in this strange world that she can barely navigate in let alone speak the language and u expect her to b fine with that…?

#I rlly want to. hmm maybe make a comic or draw something abt shri’iia in the tiefling party #^ bc that is the turmoil currently and she’s PANICKING …!!!!#but she can’t show it. she can’t give herself away. so she gets DRUNK. and she’s in her corner chugging down wine #also like the idea there that she undoes her braid bc her hands aren’t steady enough to put it back to her usual style #and maybe it keeps getting caught lol. so hair down shri’iia 🤭🥳 and her hair is wavy going down near her feet 🥳#hair down drunk shri’iia who looks like she’s having so much fun but if you look at her properly her eyes are rabid #and if u just watch her she’ll just stare at her hands with the most haunted expression #but if someone gets close to her she’ll go back to smiling and laughing and it’s so fun woohoo 🥳#but if someone invites her for a chat she doesn’t want that. just fuck her please the last woman she’s with never did even #though she always got her off. and when she does sleep someone she gets disarmed and bewildered that it’s mutual #and someone else makes her come after how many years #and that in itself is so dreadful that she can’t think about it so she’s like can you drain me again. like what u did before idc just go #for it idcccc and astarion is like. mid dissociating just going through his motions caught off guard bc this is the first time he’s #gonna be drinking someone and fucking them so . unsure what he feels about that chat let’s put a pin on it. does drink her albeit much more #demure than before. he doesn’t wanna go overboard. only doing What he Needs to Do. like hag romance first time rlly is about #the deceit and using each other for their own agenda. so when the act 3 graveyard comes around it’s like a redo of their first time bc #they’re both aware! and present! and there’s no pretense! and I like the idea that shri’iia actually confesses after like when they’re #holding each other. admits that she was actually scared of her own feelings bc it’s new. doesn’t know what to do with it. she’s very aware #of how she loves and her devotion and she doesn’t want to subject him to do bc it’s a Lot #but she wants to learn. and she wants to give her love if he wants it (just want to know if ur capable of love!!!!!)#and it’s this SWEET confession in my head augh aughhh 😭😭😭😭😭😭 maybe I’ll just do a comic of the graveyard scene lol #bc in my head. it’s a bit different. 🤭🤭 and I like it a lot heheheheh…..#shut up about bg3.#bg3 spoilers #oc: shri’iia.

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