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wistfulrat · 5 years ago

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a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[the soft boi list is here and truly i’m not surprised this rec is going to be the longest bc if there’s one thing a bitch is going to do, it’s yearn.

as always! if you love a fic, follow the authors, leave kudos & comments, send them nice msgs bc free art is still labor xoxo]

part 3: soft bois

mood: for when I need respite, a balm to the all-consuming shittiness of life

includes: fluff, comfort, low-stakes, slow-burn fics. a wistful look, a rainy morning, an unexpected grace, a stupidly disarming joke. i could live inside these fics. the smallness of human lives removed from the site of that which hurts & irreparably changes. the story-equivalent of a deep breath after a long day. pregnant silences & pensive mundanity & shy smiles. banter with bite but without the cruelty. the color lavender. weirdly whimsical. soft fics are not necessarily conflict-averse (no drarry fic rly can be, considering the context) but, they offer the reader a generous distance from the initial harm. they’re the quiet cleaning up after a storm. sometimes healing is an exacting surgical knife and other times it’s a slow scabbing. you read these fics to be reassured that the way forward is not always ruthless. and honestly?? they deserve a semblance of peace godDAMmit.

The Way Down by @letteredlettered - 65k - T “and I thought that if someone talked to you as though you were a human being you might��maybe you could act like one” --the way i think about this line daily. the characterization of draco in this fic is one my favorites bc he’s earnest and neurotic and tired of harry’s shit. which is to say, he cares so so much. and harry doesn’t know what to do with that bc he’s got a monster in his chest and lives as a recluse. but they both humanize each other in ways no one else can. “you’re just a person” has to be some kind of drarry ethics of belonging and it makes me CRY. -

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by @greaseonmymouth and dustmouth - 96k - T “Maybe it’s not about deserving it? Maybe you just get to have it anyway. . .I’m allowing myself to want something and to let myself have it and to fight for it.” --harry runs a daycare and also works at a library. draco spends a lot of time in said library. they bond over sci-fi books and therapy anecdotes and quiet philosophical conversations held over cafeteria soup. and harry’s struggling to understand his asexuality. draco’s learning how to live with anxiety and depression. they both want to be deserving of love. incredible fic with beautiful art by dustmouth. -

Open for Repairs by @drarrytrash - 35k - T “A few leaves rustle in the gutter and the muggle world pays no mind to them, to two lost boys holding on for dear life.” --all of their fics feel exactly like this. like you’ve been allowed to look at something private, tender, unexpected. draco, known abba fan, is a repairman in the muggle world & harry can’t stop breaking thrifted things in order to see him? say less, i'm thERE. also “I think I have a crush on you” goddddd - other faves by them: Counting Down By Ten - 2k - T: draco’s stepped outside of the party for a smoke. harry follows him bc of course he does. i could read this 100 times and not get tired of it. - Clouds That Veil the Midnight Moon - 36k - E: FUCKING HILARIOUS I CACKLED THROUGH THE WHOLE THING. draco’s wolfy problem and harry helping him and harry being flustered by how much he likes draco and draco’s hot heroic moment. shutup it’s perfect. “He almost asks if Draco ever gets tired of being a miserable complaining shit all the time, but he knows that he, personally, never ever gets tired of being a miserable complaining shit.” and “It’s the traumas,” Harry says gravely” --lines that live rent free in my head -

Harry Potter and the Future He Doesn't Really Want, Thanks by seefin - 70k - E “That was the only logical thing to do here, wasn’t it? It was the next step, it was the end of hurting each other and the beginning of the exact opposite.” --harry lives with luna and neville and also he dreams about the future sometimes? and he keeps running into draco. draco thinks this is sus as hell, until he doesn’t. feat. taxi rides, museums, cinemas, rooftop conversations beneath a lunar eclipse, mid-sex innocuous banter, draco and harry discussing nicki minaj. this fic charmed my ass off. seefin writes the most effortlessly hilarious dialogues. i smiled at my phone like an idiot at least 7 times. - other faves by them: Wild - 93k - E: “he liked feeling needed, for the things that he was needed for back at the house in Ireland. For cooking and gardening and driving. Easy things.” --this shit makes me cry it’s so good. harry lives in Ireland with these three brilliant, hilarious, wandless witches and draco’s a potions student who's come to study under one of the housemates and the boys have so much shit to work through but their love becomes so tender and honest. draco yells at harry a lot and harry lets him and they both keep each other grounded in something real and fuCK. - Divination for Dickheads - 7k - G: “I’m terrible at having crushes. I’ve never played anything cool a day in my life.” -- oh harry, we knOW. a bus ride, a fortune teller, an aquarium birthday party. god i love this fic. -

Modern Love by @tackytigerfic - 61k - E “But we’ve worked so hard at this, haven’t we? Yeah, I know it’s a horror to have to talk about it, but fuck it. We’re friends now, but it took so long to get here. Have you ever had to work so hard at something before?" --the steady blossoming of their friendship in this fic is so goddamn beautiful i want to yell. it’s draco and harry learning to trust each other and the whole thing unfolds so slowly, in this whimsical mix of london streets, wizarding politics, church halls feat. a Hot vicar, and a magical antique shop owner who’s married to literal poseidon?? goD the environment of this fic. immaculate. [also there’s a tender shower scene that makes me cry every single fucking time so if you read this fic pls dm me so we can be embarrassing about it together tbh] -

Nice Things by aideomai - 22k - M “He kept waiting for the weird shock of touch to not knock him clean out of his head, leave him quiet and warm and happy.” --8th year. harry forms an unlikely friendship with draco that begins with smoking weed on a windowsill. harry is touch-starved and draco touches him like he touches all his close friends - like it’s easy. the quiet affection in this fic, the way harry burrows himself into touch bc he’s been without it for his entire life. reading this is like being held. -

Running On Air by @tinyhistory - 74k - T “do you remember when we were eleven?” --alexa play coldplay’s the scientist it’s sad girl hours and we’re about to fucking yearn. you’ve seen this fic rec on every drarry list under the sun and i'm here to be redundant. the hype is so goddamn real. this story is a lyrical masterpiece held together by lines that act as refrains that will rattle around your brain until you die, probably. draco’s been missing for 3yrs. harry goes to find him. it’s their odyssey of homecoming. -

Title of Their Sex Tape by @cibeewastaken - 12k - T “But Draco, Draco was everything but boring. Draco made sitting in the rain watching an empty house fun.” --auror partners pining and draco being eccentric and harry being very earnestly gay about draco’s eccentricities!! god this fic is so genuinely fun skskd feat. undercover missions, murderous faeries, a book heist, a stunning navy dress, harry’s eyelashes. -

How We Throw Our Shadows Down by @thistle-verse - 14k - T “Draco is about to say something else— to thank Potter for what he’d done, however poorly— but Harry is smiling at him again, and it’s so soft and perfect that Draco holds in any inadequate words, lest he spoil it.” --draco collects tea cozies and of course harry has the one he wants. the sad and tender gays are at it again feat. conversations in the rain at a train station, melancholy Blaise, muggle photos, wizarding e-bay, the Dursleys. -

Helix by Saras_Girl - 92k - E “Draco sighs in his sleep and Harry clings on to consciousness, needing to hold on, to give this tiny, insignificant moment the attention it deserves” --I think maybe you can describe every soft Saras_Girl story as giving tiny, insignificant moments the attention they deserve. like, this is an 8th year fic about snails and it’s full of whimsy, grief, compassion, and easy humor. an absolute must-read author in this genre if you want languorous, episodic fics full of distinct OCs and affectionate creatures. - other faves by them: Light up the Night Sky - 98k - M “Draco, sometimes you make my head feel like soup” --the one where harry is a fireworks artist and has a pet chameleon named ken. draco is on the wizarding arts council. they both pine like hell. - Headlights in the Snow - 71k - M “they stare at each other in silence, Harry’s heart beating so loud in his chest that he thinks the biddies must be able to hear it over the sound of their card game.” --the one where draco drives the knight bus and carts around the biddy club, a group of rambunctious old ladies who knit and drink tea and gossip. harry can’t help but fall in love with the everything about this. -

Follow the Water by @xanthippe74 - 38k - T “Harry’s heavy thoughts lift at the sight, like dark clouds blown away from the sun by the wind. The tent doesn’t feel so cramped and stifling now. It feels cozy. And safe. It’s the same feeling that Harry gets when he’s at the Burrow for Sunday roasts, when a group of people who care for each other deeply are crammed into too-small a space.” --harry wanders to the lovegood house on a sunday afternoon. he’s baffled to see that luna’s taken pansy, greg, and draco under her wing. what follows is a summer of forest walks, scavenger hunts, gardening, water fights, odd cakes, faerie rings, and picnics. so many picnics. i love the pace of this fic, the innocent return to childhood things, the way luna brings out the best in all her friends. reluctantly soft slytherins are just *chefs kiss*!! -

Going Postal (A 125pg comic) by dustmouth - T what. a. beautiful. ass. comic. the wizarding fashion, the textures, the character design!! harry travels a lot for his job as a resourcer. draco works in the regulations dept. they pine like a bunch of lovesick idiots via field report notes. god i love dustmouth’s art. -

All the Earnest Young Men by @tepre - 29k - E “Draco is twenty-seven layers of personality wrapped up in drama and humour, and a wit so sharp it still stings when he doesn’t see it coming. But there is something below that, too. Something that makes Harry ache just looking at him.” --the way i would lay down my little life for tepre’s characterization of draco, whom invented the word earnest. he’s a magical art theory expert and portraits are disappearing all over London and harry’s the auror assigned to this case. and well. they’re both so very avoidant about how gay they are for each other and it’s like!! shutup and kiss!! which they do in fact, shutup and kiss. -

Trenches by sara_holmes - 3k - M “Somewhere in the distant part of his mind that hasn't frozen solid, he thinks that maybe he and Draco are about to become more than auror partners, smoking buddies, wine-mates and co-inhabitants of a snow filled trench somewhere in western Scotland.” --the plot line here is literally “it’s cold and i need a fucking cigarette” but let me tell you how I never tire of the shared loaded-silences of two emotionally repressed gays. -

The Years Before Love by lomonaaeren - 13k - M “That’s one of the meanings of peace, he thinks, as Hermione hugs him...That he can do things slowly, softly, without worrying that they won’t be there tomorrow.” --andromeda taking harry under her wing and harry finding solace in teddy. narcissa and draco showing up and the tentative relationships that slowly develop in the quiet calm of andromeda’s house. found families and kisses in the snow and special xmas gifts ugh what’s not to love -

The Moon Looks Lovely Tonight by Omi_Ohmy - 35k - M “I want this to be a house where people are welcome, where they don’t have to be any one way or another” --in which harry collects lost things--owls, best friends, inept bakers, potions experimenters--and turns the mausoleum that is grimmauld place into a home. feat. your fave drarry tropes like shared-beds and reluctant waltzing partners. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

#drarry fic rec #drarry fic #soft drarry #OK FINE I RAMBLED BUT WHAT DID WE EXPECT #alexa play futile devices

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fandomsnfluff · 4 years ago

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obey me headcanons!

ok so i’ve been playing for a couple weeks now and i am absolutely HOOKED oh my GOD. it was only a matter of time before i strung up a few headcanons for the lovely demon brothers of this game!! i currently don’t have any hcs for the side charas bc i don’t know them very well yet but i might think up some at some point!!

this was also somewhat inspired by my request to @nox-exists, i thought they were lovely so i was inspired to write some of my own!! (once again thank you for answering!! <333)

lucifer

this big ol lump isn’t really all that ticklish. he does have a few sensitive spots, but they’re pretty hard to reach though due to the specific location of the spot or it being concealed by his rather thick clothing

he used to get into a lot of tickle fights with his brothers when they were younger, but due to the responsibility as the oldest and the lead of the household he’s put on a more mature facade and he now kinda thinks it’s dumb

...except when he’s with his s/o, he’s more than open to allow them to explore his body, but even if they don’t find his ticklish spot, he’s more than happy to completely turn the tables and reduce them to a puddle of laughter and tears

that said, he is a completely merciless ler. again, as the oldest, he has LOTS of experience (even if he doesn’t do it as much now) and he knows exactly where and how to tickle. after all these years he still knows where his brothers are the most ticklish, and he is more than happy to dole it out as a punishment for bad behavior (mostly in unique circumstances though)

so yeah, like i said, he does have a few weak spots, and listen closely now: going for his neck or a specific area on the hips will probably get the most out of him, but it’ll probably be a reaction that’s still kind of disappointing :/

mammon

omg he’s totally ticklish but he HATES it. like his entire body is COMPLETELY covered in weak points and he often finds himself subconsciously squirming away from his brothers’ touches bc they’re lightly touching a weak spot when they hug him or playfully prod him

as the spiritual oldest when it comes to tickling, he’s often the one to turn into the tickle monster when his brothers are being stubborn or annoying or cute or if he just wants to do it

he’s a lot like lucifer in the sense that he is a COMPLETELY merciless ler, he will go for his lee’s weakest points until they have tears streaming down their cheeks and his hands move WAY too fast for theirs to catch up and he knows exactly how to combine this method with targeting the person’s weakest spots

yet, he’s also the kind of person that can be best described as “being unable to take what he dishes out”; he will INSTANTLY start begging if the tables are turned on him, he’ll just scream and caterwaul until he gets his way (like he does with most other things anyways so sdkhjdfshdf)

he’s the weakest under his arms and on his sides and stomach, but his feet and knees are also pretty ticklish too!

leviathan

ok this one is EASILY the most ticklish brother by FAR. he’s not ticklish in the same sense as mammon tho, bc he can pretty much hold out when someone touches a sensitive spot when he gets hugged or playfully touched, but the general threat of tickling or mention of it will have him SPRINTING

he and belphie are the ones who are constantly ganged up on because their reactions are so funny, and mammon of course is the one to start it. he will literally start screaming the INSTANT it starts and someone will definitely get slapped or kicked in the face

he doesn’t tickle people a lot (bc he’s shy), but when he does it’s actually rather messy and cute. he’ll just be laughing alongside his lee as he messily tries to find their weakest spots and make them laugh

the SOUNDS that come out of him are so funny istg. he makes EVERY single one under the sun omg, like he squeals, squeaks, snorts, chortles, screams, ALL of it. it’s the cutest thing

he’s stupidly ticklish everywhere, but his neck, armpits, and sides are SUPER weak. also the backs of his knees are pretty weak too

satan

he’s definitely ticklish, but let me tell you, he HATES being tickled more than ANYTHING else (probably even more so than lucifer). it’s not because he’s overly sensitive, but because he just finds it incredibly annoying and distracting

he finds tickling kinda dumb so he tries to stay out of anything related to such (usually started by mammon). in rare instances when he’s not focused on something else like reading or when he’s feeling just a bit playful, he might join in or even initiate it. sometimes he likes to try and research it as well, but only in secret of course

he’s a pretty evil ler tbh. he somehow still knows where his brothers are ticklish but he’ll save their worst spots for last and just tickles all around their bodies until they’re about to cry before going to their weakest spots. he does it because he thinks it’s the most torturous method, but he secretly thinks it’s cute

he was actually tickled a lot by mammon when they were younger, but then he grew to hate it and stopped enjoying their tickle fights. now whenever mammon tries to pull some shit he just yells at him to back the fuck up and get away from him

he’s EXTREMELY ticklish on the backs of his knees, but his armpits and sides are also pretty sensitive. but he absolutely HATES having his feet tickled, he’ll just kick out and yell

asmodeus

ah yes, this beautiful flirtatious boyo. he is an extreme tease and he absolutely LOVES playful tickling with his brothers!! he has quite a fair range of weak spots himself tho ;w;

he usually attempts to turn one-on-one experiences with someone other than his brothers into something a bit more spicy, but sometimes he just gets too weak to make it so and can’t help but just laugh

he’s an extremely touchy and physically affectionate person, so he usually finds himself in a position where the person he’s with ends up being ticklish and he can’t help but tease them by brushing up against their sensitive spots or just tickling them outright

despite being very physically affectionate himself, he’s often rendered susceptible to his brothers’ attacks, especially by mammon. he usually contributes to tickle fights in one way or another between the brothers, but this puts him in a very susceptible position because mammon will NOT let a SINGLE one of his brothers out of the tickle pile without experiencing his wrath at least once (even satan)

for some reason he’s RIDICULOUSLY sensitive on the bottoms of his feet and also on his neck, he HATES it because for him those spots are super hard for him to defend. he often finds himself laying on his stomach for his brothers (mammon) to go to town on him and make him squeal with glee

beelzebub

oh my fucking god he is THE definition of tickle monster. he tickles belphie literally ALL the time because he thinks his baby brother is the cutest thing in such a vulnerable position ;w;

he thinks tickling is cute and can be a good way to distract himself from his hunger, and he enjoys playful squabbles with his brothers from time to time

he’s not a really evil ler like mammon or lucifer, he’s a lot more gentle but he still knows exactly how to target someone’s weak spots until they’re begging or literally crying. but he does have pretty good self-control, he always stops when he feels like he’s getting carried away or when he gets the sense that the person has had enough. he also ALWAYS stops when the person tells him to stop, he takes that as a sign that he’s getting too carried away

he’s actually not too ticklish himself, but he does have his sensitive spots!! he’s about 90% ler, but he is the SWEETEST and cutest lee ;w;

his weak spot is his stomach, but his sides and some parts of his legs get him pretty well!! he has the sweetest laugh and he’ll snort and hiccup on occasion too ;o;

belphegor

oh man. oh mAN. GOD IF SOMETHING WERE TO HAPPEN TO LEVI THEN THIS ONE WILL EASILY TAKE THE PLACE AS THE MOST TICKLISH BROTHER I MEAN COME ON

gets into a lot of tickle fights with beel (as we’ve established), but he usually ends up on the bottom crying for his brother to stop, he’s just too ticklish for his own good and there’s no way he would EVER win a tickle fight against his twin

even though levi is technically the most ticklish, belphie comes off as much more cute and laid-back, likely due to his “sleepy” nature, so he’s often rendered susceptible to attacks from all of his brothers who end up tickling him until he’s crying or turned into a complete puddle

despite his own sensitivity, he is a completely MEAN ler. he won’t necessarily pin his lee down, but he’ll get them in a position that will make it easiest for him to attack all of their sensitive spots, moving his hands from place to place to make his lee scream and cry out for mercy. he doesn’t tease a lot verbally but he’ll be beaming on the inside, which will give him the energy to continue his sadistic attack

he’s ticklish everywhere, like ANYTHING will work on him, but his weak spots are armpits, sides, knees, and feet. he’ll get pretty grumpy if you target his lower body and he’s a kicker so be careful ;o;

#obey me #om headcanons #headcanons #anime tickling #my posts

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river-bottom-nightmare · 5 years ago

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Damijon Secret Santa

@woahjaybird happy holidays ris!!!!!!!!!! i admit, i was a bit confused, bc you signed up for a ship fic exchange and requested platonic bros, but whatever. i hope you like it!

To be honest, it was something Damian said a lot.

Jon heard those words practically every time Damian opened his mouth: in the middle of a mission, when they were baking pies with Ma Kent, during a stakeout, on a rooftop eating takeout.

They used to be annoying. God, sometimes Jon just wanted to drop his restraint and punch Damian in the face, full-force. Especially when he said those words, again and again and again. Over time, though, Jon grew used to them, and after a while, they just began to amused him.

You should be afraid of me.

Because Jon never understood those words. What was there to be scared of?

The two of them were sitting on a rooftop in Metropolis, Jon with his long legs dangling over the side of the building, Damian cross-legged next to him. Taking a long slurp of his smoothie, Jon glanced over at Damian, who was outlining their plan of attack for tomorrow-- a mission to take down an arms dealer who had been working out of Metropolis for months. With Dad stretched thin over League, international, and intergalactic affairs, criminals were becoming a little less hesitant to step foot into the city. Superboy and Robin would be taking care of that soon.

Jon was listening, he really was. The battle plans were definitely lodging themselves somewhere in Jon’s subconsciousness. But he had to admit, most of his attention was fixed firmly on Damian himself.

Jon remembered the days the prickly young boy would throw his nose up haughtily in the air, state he’d been intelligent enough to have a doctorate at seven years old, and miff at anyone who insinuated otherwise. It was a far sight from when Damian had curled himself up on Jon’s bed, and under the guise of watching a movie, told Jon about his acceptance into the most prestigious art schools in Gotham.

And that was the reason behind Jon’s inattention, wasn’t it? Damian was eighteen, now. Their age difference didn’t seem like much when they were ten and thirteen and going against the world with all the confidence of a couple boys playing pretend. Now, Damian had a weariness in his shoulders, but lips that quirked up into a smile far too often, skin layered in scars but hands gentler than Jon ever thought he was capable of. Jon himself was a fumbling, awkward fifteen year old with jeans that were always too short, hair that was always too messy. And Jon used to think he was over feeling inferior to his best friend.

He’d miss him. Jon would miss Damian so much. Sure, Damian would probably try and keep their visits somewhat consistent, but work would pile up, and a curator would probably see Damian’s talents and whisk him away to the world of the famous artists, and Damian would forget he ever had a friend named Jon and would go on to become a household name while Jon spent the rest of his life living in his parents’ house and updating his mediocre blog that he started because of a dare.

No, he wasn’t being dramatic, thank you very much.

Unfortunately, Damian seemed to catch onto his lack of attention and snapped his fingers underneath Jon’s nose, startling him back to focus.

Never one to sugarcoat, Damian said, “You look miserable.”

“What? No, I’m fine!” Jon didn’t know why he even tried to play it off, he’d never been able to lie to Damian.

“Right. My mistake. Someone who was fine would definitely spend the past hour drinking out of a smoothie cup that’s already empty.”

Huh. Jon hadn’t even realized he’d finished the drink. He put it to the side and shook his head. “Really, it’s not a pro-oblem.” Oh, goddamnit.

“Your voice cracks are ridiculous,” Damian informed him. Why had Jon ever thought he’d changed? That smug voice was as irritating as ever.

“Yeah, they’re hilarious, thanks.”

“I don’t understand why you’re upset.” Apparently, this matter was serious enough for Damian to put his map down. Wasn’t that comforting?

But Jon had never liked to keep things from his best friend. “That. That’s what’s bothering me.”

“Your voice cracks?” Now Damian just sounded confused.

“Yes! No, I don’t know. I just don’t like them.” Jon crossed his arms in frustration.

When he looked over at Damian, the other boy’s eyes were wide, and in that stupidly deep and non-cracking voice, he said, “This conversation has gone well past the point of understanding and I’m going to continue with the plan now.”

Jon sighed. “No, Damian, it’s not that.”

“Then?”

Searching for the right words, Jon drummed his fingers together. “You...you’re going off to that fancy art school soon. You’re all grown up. And here I am with my stupid video games and voice cracks.”

Jon wasn’t exactly sure what he was expecting. Damian could never be called a master of social interaction, and his basic settings were sarcastic, condescending, or incredulous. Still, Jon expected something a bit kinder than:

“You’re such a moron, Jonathan.”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

Jon stared at Damian for a moment, blinking stupidly. “So I tell you about the problem that’s been eating me up for weeks, and all you say is that I’m a moron? Thank you so much for that.”

“I’m telling you you’re a moron because you’re worrying about something so inconsequential.”

“Oh please, do elaborate.”

Damian paused, then let out a tired sigh, turning to face Jon. This was going to be a serious conversation, then.

“Jonathan. I have told you time and time again. You should be scared of me-”

“Oh my god,” Jon interrupted. “This stuff, again?” He was laughing now. “I know, I know. You should be horrified, cower in terror underneath my ruthlessness, blah blah blah. You say it all the time, I get it. I should be scared of you.”

Damian stared at him. “Are you done?” he said with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m tired of you bringing up the same thing over and over, Damian.”

“And in saying that, you just proved my point.”

Jon frowned in confusion. “What?”

“I’ve always said that you should be afraid of me. But you never have been, not since the moment we met.”

“Like there’s anything to be scared of.”

“Yes, Jonathan. There is.” Damian looked Jon in the eye, his gaze sharp and serious.

Damian’s honesty was strange, something Jon wasn’t used to, so he tried to play it off with a laugh. “Yeah, yeah, assassin training’s tough-”

“When I was six years old, I murdered a man in front of his daughter.”

Jon fell silent.

“I used to command an entire legion in my grandfather’s army. We completely destroyed and took down three different countries.”

“Damian, I-”

“Once, Grandfather put me in a straightjacket and wrapped me in chains, surrounded by trained guards, with no instruction other than to escape. And I did.”

Hesitantly, Jon said, “I never knew.”

“Because I never told you. That, and so much more, is why everybody I ever know has been scared of me.”

“Even Nightwing?”

“Nightwing grew out of it eventually,” Damian admitted. “But everyone else. The rest of the bats. Father. Even Mother. There’s fear in their eyes when they look at me.”

“Oh. Uh,” Jon shrugged. “That sucks.”

“That sucks?” Damian said, dry but amused.

“I didn’t know what else to say!” Jon defended.

“See? That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.”

Jon furrowed his eyebrows. “You’ve been trying to tell me it sucks? Because I already knew it sucks.”

“Jonathan…” Damian trailed off, then grabbed Jon’s wrists with his own hands.

“Hey!” Jon protested, though only out of surprise. Because Damain’s hands were warm and his thumb was pressing down on Jon’s pulse point and Jon could honestly say he had no objection to this.

Damian’s face showed nothing but piercing intensity: brows furred and eyes locked on Jon’s own. “Jon. Look me in the eyes, and tell me you’re scared of me.”

“But I’m not?”

“I just told you things that would have grown men running away from me in terror. Tell me at least some of that scares you.”

“No,” Jon shook his head and gripped the other’s boy’s wrists back. “No. I’m not scared of you.”

Letting out a breath, Damian moved away. For a moment, Jon found himself chasing that warmth.

“You are the only person who’s ever thought that.” Damian turned, shifting to mirror Jon’s position. Staring out over the city, a billboard washed colours over Damian’s face. He looked like a work of art, and Jon had no idea how anybody could ever fear him.

“You’re my best friend, Damian.” Jon shrugged, despite the fact that Damian couldn’t see him. “I’ve seen you scream at a machine for losing at Cheese Viking. I’ve seen you befriend a little squirrel you found on Ma’s farm. So how exactly am I supposed to be afraid of you?”

Damian nodded, as if that solidified something. “If you really think that I would leave the only person that isn’t scared of me, if you think that I would stop being friends with someone who has always thought of me as a human first and a weapon second just because I’m going to a university, then you are the biggest moron to ever walk the face of the earth.”

Stunned, Jon moved to sit next to Damian. “Oh.”

Jon had always been aware of their height difference, made plenty of jokes about it, but it really struck him how much smaller Damian was when the older boy turned to look up and smile at him. “So stop worrying, okay Kent? It’s unbecoming.”

“Whatever you say,” Jon acquiesced.

Damian wasn’t leaving for good. Damian, with his burning green eyes and molten beauty, still wanted to be friends with him.

With a smile on his face, Jon turned to look out at the city, letting the quiet wash over him. At his side, Damian did the same. A huge thank you to @iamwhelmed for organizing the secret santa this year!!

tag list: @woahjaybird @birdy-bat-writes @elles-shitposts-personified @subtleappreciation @screennamealreadyused @pricetagofficial @catxsnow @iconbicon

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colloquialcolors · 3 years ago

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i should maybe wait till i finish the dlc to do this, but NAHW its okay. having finished the main storyline of Control, a smattering of thoughts, just for future me:

- fucking HELL, environmental design, my beloved. every single environmental artist and level design engineer and etc in this game has my whole heart. the different deparments! the POSTERS! people doing office shit melded with the utter FUCK ALL absurdity, people complaining in correspondences and emails to each other, people being /people/ told through levels and background details. The agents bitching in the executive area. Actual scribblings on whiteboards. The little "LETS DO WORK!" sign with the little "NO!!" post it note under it! Like. Oh. I always love stopping and looking at text around the game, signs and throwaway text and little shit, and by /god/ does this game reward you for doing it.

- the game mechanics and powers are like. wishfufillment to the max. holy shit. the telekenesis and launching is exactly as fun as it looks (moreso, with the lock on!). The gun recharging its own ammo given time is the Best Fucking Thing Ever. and the FLYING. the flying is the best approximation ive ever seen of how flying works in my dreams. (not permanently, cuts out sometimes, but its COOL while its happening). The Anchor fight? Fucking incredible.

- the worldbuilding is astonishing. genuinely astonishing. idk what to say beyond that

- THE ASHTRAY MAZE <3 ASHTRAY MAZE SECTION MY BELOVED <3 MUSIC AND LEVEL DESIGN AND MECHANICS ALL MELDED INTO A THING OF BEAUTY. <3 <3

- character building im still a bit on the fence about, but i think i enjoyed it. the side characters definitely got more fleshed out as you went along. jesse is... maybe a little flat at points, but still good, well thought out overall. either way, shes mine now. i give her depth. and angst.

- i still. okay. listen. i still dont Really Trust The FBC. Which I think is the point??? but like we seemed to end on a note of "now we are FBC and we are good and FBC is doing good bc we are in charge :)" and like. LIIIKE. HMMM. LISTEN. THIS INSTITUTION AS A WHOLE STILL KIDNAPPED YOUR BROTHER AND DOES VARIOUS UNETHICAL THINGS THAT DIRECTLY RUINED YOUR LIFE AND ALSO WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THE BOARD HUH? I think its going foe a thing of "the people matter more than the institution and the people Make the institution" which. hmm. sure. okay, i guess?

- I did Not Know it was going to be so horror/horror adjacent when I first got it. but you know what? it was a good time. nice change of pace. well executed. very nice.

okay enough of the mechanics now for me having a good time:

- jesse my beloved <3 jesse making little sarcastic remarks to herself <3 jesse seeing weird shit and going "fuck?! okay. sure." <3 jesse with imposter syndrome. <3

- jesse jesse they LISTENED to your THERAPY sessions they TRACKED YOU YOUR WHOLE LIFE and you thought you were INSANE jesse how do you feel about that. jesse pls @ me.

- jesse whats up with your right shoulder why do you always adjust it

- i really thought pope was gonna be evil but. i guess shes not! so shes just good and on your side with a little undercurrent of "i am 2 steps away from letting my passion take me TOO far" all the time. fair enough! love that for her

- darling only being shown through videos is a FASCINATING way to frame a character, 10/10. very interesting

- fucking hell i love the containment sector and its little altered items so much. i loved learning about each item, i love the absurdity of looking into the cells and seeing just. A fucking rubber duck or some shit under close surveillance. just.. orgh. maybe my favorite aspect of the game. reading reports.

-- i think its similar to the appeal of SCPs. just incredibly wild and sometimes hilarious shit in a deeply formal tone and scientifically examined. stupidly mundane objects. tiny impacts. idk its really good.

- im trying to avoid gushing more about env/level design but. the use of lights and colored lights to indicate things? work of art. consistently reinforcing the association of red lights with Bad Shit and using that everywhere.

- *cocks my gun and points it directly at the board* WHAT ARE YOU HIDING YOU ASSHOLES. WHAT ARE YOU.

- orig music!!! for the ashtray!!! like what!!!! shit!

- going into the hiss dream sequence section like "is this Imposter Syndrome, the Game", finishing the sequence like "it IS"

- underhill would kill me if she could

- langston is. hilarious. i dont think i trust him bc like. he locked up my brother his whole life and sees 0 issue with it. he LITERALLY runs the Panopticon. but. hes funny. dammit. they got me.

- arish is good. i like arish. arish is my buddy. hes just trying to do his JOB okay, fuck, what is all this shit.

- marshall is.... terrifying. mixed thoughts on marshall.

- pope is... look. i like pope as a person, i think, i just also think that she would 100% cause a world ending event because she got real excited about the scientific possibilities and the research and forgets about consequences. but jesse deserves a friend (👀friend?) and pope is Good and has our backs so. sure.

- im still thinking about dylan. i think dylan is more of a concept or a placeholder than an actual character which feels- right. the story is about jesse. dylan was only ever a driving factor, a name in a quest, a concept, an icon.

- i UNDERSTAND why yanking an explosive object at yourself is BAD but also did the designers consider: im bad at being careful :(

- do the altered items get lonely :(

- i think jesse should be allowed to take a nap. as a mechanic. also be given a hug, as a mechanic. (jesse how touch starved are you. how often have you recieved hugs in your life. jesse.)

- the canonical event of "i picked up a gun and now have a job AND are promoted AND need to clean up a ton of shit, christ" is already hilarious, but its even funnier when jesse comments on it. wild shit, huh girl.

- i unlocked multiaunch and im gonna go fucking HAM with it tomorrow.

#its been a while since i did one of these. but this game gave me many good feelings so we are gonna go ahead and preserve that #URGH the env design and storytelling and level design are all just. so fucking good i cant get over it. the attention to detail is. so good #and the ACTUAL GAME MECHANICS <3 and the execution of the storyline/genre elements/pacing was also beautiful #idk. really really well done. i have nitpicks but like. as a whole. ambitious AND beautifully executed.#sysrandom #sysfandoming #control #control game #i should probably make my own tag for these game wrap up rambles but oh well #and now... to reblog things #game completion hurrah #sysgaming

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touchmycoat · 4 years ago

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HC/LQG!Anon: Oh man, LQG has got zero game, You can't tell him he's running a honeypot. HC just dresses him and tells him to stand there and cross your arms, flex a bit. Ok, pick up that book in the low shelf. Reach up and get that red book. Slowly stroke your finger along the binding; now loosen that tie. Sit down and sprawl, spread your legs a bit, perfect. And the mark has been completely distracted - drooling - and SQQ/LBH are in the background stealing EVERYTHING. (contd 1/3)

HX/LQG cont: But if you tell him he's running the honeypot he's lost. HX hates using LBH for honeypots because after that he has to listen to an hour of LBH crying and clinging to SQQ for having betrayed his love. I also love that LQG doesn't look like a hitter - he goes into a room with the hard guys and they're all like who's the 小白臉 except for the ones who recognize him who are sneaking out the back hoping he doesn't see them. 2 minutes later he's the only one standing. (2/3)

HX/LQG (3/3): Tara!HC???? PERFECTION. Ahhh - red/black camaraderie? More like Torment LQG squad. Caterpillars!!! I giggled so much. I think there also has to be a honeypot where LQG is floundering and HX comes in to - ahem - put on a show so that the mark will get jealous and/or want a threesome ;P AHHHHH - this AU is so fun - I love the idea that kids gravitate to LQG. He's got a grumpy face, but they know who will be first to defend them.

I'M LAUGHING SO HARD AT THE THOUGHT god, so LBH's the first one to clearly state: "the way you can tell if LQG likes you is to give him a direct order for a simple physical action, like 'turn left' or 'duck' or 'put your hands above your head.' All verbal questions aside, if he follows your order, he likes you."

Obviously, the reason LBH knows this is bc he sees LQG doing this with SQQ and aggressively not doing it with LBH. But that also means LBH sees right through him when LQG starts doing it with HX. LBH's goal-oriented as fuck, and is the number one xuange shipper bc if LQG's getting it on with HX, then great! No more pesky best friend nonsense for Shizun! So LBH starts setting up these little demonstrations of LQG's affections—when he or HC tell LQG to do anything, LQG aggressively refuses on principle. When SQQ or HX say jump, LQG says how high.

But HX's defense against that is to flat out tell LQG. LQG gets flustered ofc, but it kind of turns out...he can't help it??? He says it's just a job loyalty thing but honestly it's more like an Ella Enchanted situation where even if he tries really really really hard not to, if HX says "get that file for me" he'll angrily stalk across the room, fling the file at HX, and throw himself out the window. And at this point, it's more embarrassing for LQG than it is for HX so HX is not above using it for honeypot missions. He plays LQG like a twister board while, yup, bingqiu steal everything in the background.

jlnkjnSDKJFJSANFL LBH YOU RIDICULOUS LITTLE MAN. The first time he seduced a mark he was absolutely terrific, but hunched in a corner back at the bar and hissed whenever HX got too close. "I feel dirty," he hiccuped, burying his face into the back of Shen Qingqiu's outstretched hand. "I feel used. I'm sorry Shizun, I would never ever ever—"

"Yes yes I know Binghe. You'd never betray me. That's fine."

小白臉柳大哥！！！！Give us that classic Eliot scene where he walks into a warehouse full of rugged large men, the one in charge has their boss on the line, who's warning them that HX sent somebody. The guy's like "pft, don't worry boss, the only person here's this little pretty boy. What brings you to the bad part of town, sweetheart? If you're looking for the hair salon that's two blocks over." and while everyone's cackling, LQG's glaring them down and silently shutting all the doors and windows. "Oooh you sure you wanna do that? Aren't you gonna be scared of the dark?" "Wait wait, hair? Good-looking guy?" "Yeah boss, dipshit's out here with a ponytail—" "Ponytail? And a beauty mark under his left eye?" "Uh, yeah?" "You fucking idiot—RUN! THAT'S LIU—" wham bam thank you ma'am everybody's down for the count.

YEAH OH MY GOD WAIT. LQG gets stuck distracting a mark again, LBH does the lift, SQQ copies the key code and HC uses the hidden folders to apply pressure on the corrupt CEO, etc.etc. So now they can pull back, except the mark won't leave LQG alone. LQG is as unpleasant as he knows how to be, but the mark is convinced they're good to go, so HX has to step in and play the dangerous and possessive ex. And when HX slams LQG into the bar (HC drawling in their ears "I don't know what instructions you want me to give him here, Black Water, I assume he's already letting you do whatever you want to him"), the mark is meant to find this to be too much trouble and run, except he just kind of...licks his lips. Oops.

also i plotted out the entire First David and Second David jobs for this AU, goddammit. it works almost stupidly well.

#leverage AU #we're building up such a bank of headcanons here #i'm so tickled by imagining LQG and HX growing *fond* of each other #in their own emotionally constipated ways #HX will give them little to no personal details but they all know he had a fiancee #LQG also will fess up to nothing but both he and HX (master of intel-gathering) know that he's gay as they come #HX aggressively refusing to show any form of affection that cannot be explained away by 'workplace camaraderie'#LQG's a lot more of a disaster gay about it but also he doesn't have HX's trust issues #he's not out here trying to fool anybody #he's just trying to take care of his people

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doggirldick · 4 years ago

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top 5 dragon quests

1. dragon quest ix: sentinels of the starry skies

mostly attached to it bc i played it when i was 12 but also, of the main series only 9 and 10 have character customisation and making yourself a little akira toriyama character is cool as all hell.

plus, the plot, right: god decides mankind was a mistake and tried to wipe em out but his daughter says no and turns herself into a tree so now we have a bunch of angels who have to collect the gratitude of mortals over millennia to turn her back. except one angel fell in love with a mortal and then was led to believe she’d betrayed him, then ended up a prisoner stewing in hatred for 300 years until he goes nuts, kills god, and assumes his place. and you’re basically like this fallen angel’s grandkid just tryna figure out what that very suspicious evil beam that fired straight up into the sky was and why your god won’t speak to you anymore while daddy aquila tries to find out where granddaddy corvus disappeared to 300 years ago.

how can you not love that? and that’s not even mentioning the australian alcoholic dragon, your flapping faery best friend and flying train co-pilot, and a stupidly complex random dungeon system i go nuts for when it comes to the postgame

2. dragon quest xi: echoes of an elusive age

this would be my fav if it weren’t for the nostalgic attachment i have to 9. please please please if you play one dragon quest game, make it 11. i can only describe the experience as falling in love with a world and its characters before your heart is ripped out your chest and torn to pieces. then you slowly reassemble it but there’s a piece missing and fuck me it hurts

3. dragon quest viii: journey of the cursed king

8 and 11 are the only main series games with voice acting and it adds so much flavour. it also really enforces how british the english localisations are. when yangus starts dishing out the cockney rhyming slang, i’m brown bread. the plot isn’t as good as many of the others, i must admit, but it’s just a stupidly fun game and i honestly think the 3ds remake is one of the best 3ds games available

4. dragon quest vii: fragments of the forgotten past

i feel like the production value is lacking on this one a bit. the original ps1 version was alright but the 3ds remake could’ve been more like what the 3ds remake of 8 ended up being. unfortunately, the remake was developed by arte piazza who also did the ds and mobile remakes of 4-6 and the 2d mode in 11S and they just make some visual design choices i have some strong negative onions about.

but what you’ve got at the core is a complex story about time travel, some real fuckin sad moments, and one of the sickest (in both senses of the word) final boss designs of the series (bet you’ve never seen a boss cough himself up as a form transition while he talks about how beautiful he is or have his flesh boil and melt off)

5. dragon quest v: hand of the heavenly bride

this shit was so good they made a movie about it. actually, dragon quest: your story was dubbed and put on netflix so you should watch it, just bear in mind it’s a kids movie so they massively played down the darker parts and it has to be quite short so it’s watered down and changed a fair bit, the ending is entirely different too but it has a really nice message about nostalgia.

anyway, this is a game where you will watch your father get killed in front of you at 6 years old, you will get abducted into slavery for 10 years for an evil cult, you will watch the slave drivers whip one of the slaves just for fun, you will get married, you will have kids, you will watch you and your wife get turned to stone so your kids spend the first 8 years of their lives without their actual parents, you will get restored to flesh and spend half the game with your kids looking for your wife statue. and oh god the end stretch, your mother, damn that shit hurted

#long post #dragon quest

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jowritesthingss · 5 years ago

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Motherfluffer

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Rating: Teen (for some swearing)

Content Warning(s): swearing, teasing, lemme know if there are any I should add bc I got nuthin’ atm lol

Length: 4,239 words

Brief Summary: A bullet fic about Janus’ hair, because this is one of the important things in life obviously. (Which, for the other five sides, it really is. Duh.)

TS Masterlist + AO3 Links

under his hat, Janus actually has really, really fluffy hair

it’s nice and soft and puffy and glossy and it’s honestly fricking beautiful because he takes so much pride in his appearance as a whole that he can’t just not take care of his hair, even if he hates it

which, he does, for that matter, hate his hair

it’s just...yeah, it looks nice, and it feels nice, but...it’s so fluffy and cute, and Janus of all people is most certainly not supposed to be cute, so in that it is utterly detestible, Janus thinks

hence why he is always wearing his bowler hat

it’s just seemingly nonsensical that deceit of all sides would have a mess of floof atop his head. it doesn’t look very serious or scary or snake-y at all, it doesn’t suit him whatsoever, and the decided lack of aesthetic of it all is horrid, if you ask Janus

(not that anyone would ask Janus, because none of the other sides know about his hair, nor will they ever know about it if Janus gets his way with it)

((he doesn’t. get his way with it, that is))

our story begins with that first Sanders Sides Asides, in which Roman steals Janus’ hat to use when they’re “voting” on which movie to watch together

contrary to popular belief, Janus does actually kinda-sorta want to join them all for movie night

(Frozen isn’t good, he totally hates it, he doesn’t identify with Hans at all and he totally doesn’t hate Disney for doing Hans a dirty with their last-minute decision to turn him into a bad guy)

besides, even Remus is going to this movie night thing, for goshsake

and even if the others still don’t really like him, surely they can tolerate being in the same vicinity as Janus if he’s quiet and shuts up and just watches the movie, right??

(he doesn’t even have to sit with them on the couch or hell, he doesn’t even have to be in the living room at all. he can just stand in the kitchen or sit on the stairs and watch from there if that makes them all feel better)

so Janus is preparing to get ready for the movie night

he’s wearing his darkest black capelet and his nicest silk yellow shirt and the slacks he knows make his butt look best, and he’s even doing actual fancyish makeup too to top it all off. and if asked he’ll say it’s just because Thomas had been planning on going out for the night, hadn’t he

(it’s not because he cares what the other sides think of him and how he looks. it’s not because they’re all stupidly attractive without even trying and because he’ll never be able to measure up to all that because of his goddamned snake face. it’s not because he wants to impress them. it’s not)

and at last, Janus is ready to ascend into the real world and descend down the stairs in swirls of darkness to rival even Virgil and dramatics to rival even Roman’s

and he goes to grab his beloved black bowler hat with the satin ribbon from its usual spot on a peg by his bedroom door and it’s not there where is it where—

Janus searches high and low and left and right and everywhere in his room he could think it would be and even some weird places, like the top of his wardrobe and in the toilet in his bathroom and under the trash can (not just in it, under) but he, he just can’t find it anywhere, where could it possibly have gone??

and he’s not like Remus or Roman he can’t just Imagine one into Being like they can so he doesn’t have anything else to cover his hair

(he’s not about to cry he’s not)

so when he hears the others thunder by his room and sink out to go watch movies with Thomas he thinks about sinking out with them, regardless of whether his hair is visible or not, but he shakes his head violently because he can’t he just can’t, the others still don’t really like him and they’ll just make fun of him and they won’t take him seriously anymore and it’s taken so much work fitting into this ominous villain persona just to get them to halfway listen to him already

(and he isn’t actually crying now he isn’t)

eventually he calms down enough to appear in the real world at the top of Thomas’ stairs, deciding to call out to the others at a break between movies, just to ask if anyone’s seen his hat without letting them really see him

and what should he see when he peeps out

but his hat

and it’s clutched in Roman’s attractive grubby hands

and he gets swept away in his anger at Roman for taking his precious hat without at least asking first, especially when he can literally just conjure his own fucking hat, dammit—so without thinking, Janus marches into the living room to take it back

he loses steam halfway down the stairs and shit he’s regretting his emotion-ridden decision but it’s too late to go back now

and even though Janus is pressing down on his hair and trying to hide it, it’s miserably obvious that his hair is a soft floofy mess even as his demeanor and expression are neither soft nor floofy

the others all stare and gape at his head, then they all exchange a Look with each other and he sees it and he knows what it must mean, he knows

he rushes out some sort of scolding at Roman, he’s not even sure what he said, really, just anything to distract them from his hair, only it doesn’t work, they’re still staring, why won’t they stop staring

he leaves the room as quickly as he can, leaving all dignity behind in his rush

but he can’t help but linger at the top of the stairs

Janus listens in on the others with bated breath and a sinking feeling in his chest, worried that they’re going to say something about his hair and yet he’s too much of a masochist to try and ignore it and leave

“oh. my gosh,” Patton says in awe, and he must be so in awe at how stupid Janus looks with his hair, he must be wondering how it’s even possible for someone to look so absurdly pathetic

(spoiler alert: nopenopenope. Patton trying to figure out how he never realized just how attractive Janus is)

“did you see his hair??” Roman says incredulously, and there’s some unknown emotion tightly contained in his voice. he must be trying hard not to burst into that boisterous laughter of his. Janus privately doesn’t think he looks all that bad, really, even with his scales and the halo of hair that surrounds him, but of course Roman of all people would find it especially silly and use it against him

(actually, Roman’s really just trying hard not to fangirl. that’s pure gay panic he’s trying to tamp down on babey)

“that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you dorks!” Remus says and god, that feels like a slap in the face to Janus. Remus ratted him out? just like that?? they’d been each other’s only friend for years and then Remus goes and gets accepted-ish by the light sides and then that’s it. just like that, huh.

(fuck that betrayal stings like nothing he’s felt before but he’s not going to let on about that)

Janus watches as the other sides clump together and begin discussing something even his most excellent snakey hearing can’t pick up, but he’s sure they’re insulting him and making fun of his hair

(spoiler alert: they’re actually just making a game plan to figure out how they can all touch his floofy hair and using Thomas as a sounding board)

and eventually he hears the other sides burst into laughter

which Janus, listening in, hears

and he’s hurt because he always knew they wouldn’t take him seriously how he is, things like that are the very reason he wore his hat in the first place, why did stupid fucking Roman have to take his hat and force him to reveal himself like this??

Janus slinks off, shoving the hat back down on his head, hard

and if he’s kinda heartbroken over it all, no way in hell is he about to acknowledge it

the whole rest of it just follows all the other sides just absolutely becoming obsessed with Janus’ hair and subsequently falling in love with him lmao

after that one time Roman took Janus’ hat, everyone just keeps trying to steal his hat the second he lays it down or takes it off for the night

(Patton shoves an entire pack of gum in his mouth all at once, cheeks puffed up like a chipmunk’s, and then as he passes Janus lying down and blep-ing in the afternoon sun he “accidentally” spits it all out on his hat just to get Janus to take it off to clean it.)

((he blinks once. once. once and Patton has torn it away out of his hands, reaching out a hand and mussing up Janus’ already-messy hat hair, and then dancing just out of reach, promising to go clean it for him as an “apology”))

so Janus starts wearing his hat more and more and more, regardless of the circumstances the others keep trying to catch him under

(“gee, isn’t it hot in the mindscape today!” Roman pants, shirtless and sweating his ass off, after having literally turned the heater up to eighty-four fucking degrees Farenheit, right as Janus watched him. “sure makes you wanna shed a few layers of clothing. hahaha. like...oh, I dunno, maybe that hat of yours...? and, ahm, maybe that lil cape and mmmaybeee your shirt too pretty pretty please?”)

((which, Janus does end up removing his shirt, only because Roman promises him half the money he bet Virgil on Janus having a six pack—and who knows why Roman’s talking to boyfriend about another man’s abs but hey, Janus isn’t one to judge—but the bowler hat stays firmly placed on top of his head))

(((that day his wallet expands by twenty bucks, and his satisfaction expands immeasurably when he sees Virgil next and the anxious side’s face immediately flushes dark red)))

((((yeah, that’s what you missed out on when you left the dark sides, ya lil bitch. ha))))

the other sides’ ploys to get his hat off of him and his hair in fluffing distance spiral more and more and more

once he even catches Logan—yeah, that’s right, stupid McSerious Mr. Logan N. Sanders (the N stands for Necktie)—trying to head a goddamn sting operation with his boyfriends, trying to take the hat from right off his head while Janus is reading in the mindscape’s living room

(there was a fishing pole, a grappling hook, a pair of Virgil’s surprisingly emo underpants, and an exorbitant amount of Cheez-Its involved and Janus really, really regrets learning this information)

((he totally steals that pair of MCR boxers when the Logan, Patton, and Remus aren’t looking though))

anyways

ahem

petty panty theivery aside, the other sides are all getting increasingly more desperate, and they’re not even bothering to hide it at this point, even

and Janus just doesn’t get why they’re trying so hard to embarrass him and insult him like this

like, maybe it’s because he totally schooled them after the whole wedding fiasco??

because Thomas did accept him, and technically the others did too, no matter how grudgingly, but he supposes that Thomas accepting him could have forced everyone else’s hands, so maybe this is their way of making fun of him even as they’re not supposed to verbally insult him anymore??

but regardless of why they’re doing it, now Janus has to take to wearing his hat everywhere

like, literally everywhere, or else it’ll be stolen if he so much as blinks or takes his eyes and hands off it for even a second

literally

remus tries to sneak up on him in the shower and grab his hat off the counter only to find a drenched Janus, fully naked save for the bowler hat, glaring sourly at him from the shower as he attempts to stealthily creep into the bathroom

he even has to wear the hat places like in bed, because otherwise the others Will take the opportunity to steal it

once he wakes up to Patton staring at him, the moral side’s eyes wide as he lays on the other side of his bed, one of his arms reaching out to Janus’ head and fucking caressing his hair

(and no, his stomach does Not do weird flips at that, it doesn’t)

((will he ever actually start to believe these lies he’s telling himself??))

everyone keeps finding more and more and more ridiculous ways to get Janus to take off his hat and more and more ridiculous places to accidentally “misplace” it

Janus still is convinced that they’re pulling all of this shit just because they wanna laugh at his hair and insult him

(but no! it is because they are all useless gays that rly rly rly like the floof of hairs on his head)

at some point Patton or Roman or someone literally just. fucking freezes his hat in a block of ice in the freezer

it is at this point that Janus decides he has had Enough

and at this point he can’t even lie to himself anymore and say that he isn’t crying

(and thank god he found his hat when going down to get a glass of water in the middle of the night, and not the following morning at breakfast, because then the others would see him so fragile like that and even if they’ve already seen his stupid fucking hair they certainly don’t deserve to see him this vulnerable)

but he carries the tub of ice with his precious hat in it back to his room, glass of water forgotten

and he’s silent but he’s shaking and he’s sobbing and he just. doesn’t know what to do anymore in response to any of this

because he’s just so, so tired of the others teasing him like this and he doesn’t know if it’s normal or not because he has no prior experience with them

—all Janus knows of the light sides is that back before the whole hat and hair thing started spiralling so far out of control, it was actually kind of nice to be around them sometimes

like, not to be cliché or anything

but passionately arguing over Disney with Roman and Virgil was really nice, reading and co-existing with Logan was an excellent wind-down from busy days, talking theatre and doing kinda-sorta-almost-horny-but-not-quite dirty dancing with Roman was fun, Patton was a surprisingly excellent co-conspirator for pranks, Remus and Logan were surprisingly excellent victims for said pranks, Virgil and he had finally made up and were maybe even flirting a little bit again, and things had just. they had been nice—

so excepting the whole hat and hair thing, things had been oh so nice and friendly and maybe even flirty between him and the other sides

only now it isn’t now it’s horrible and he just doesn’t understand why they can’t leave him alone already or at least stop beating around the bush and tell him why they won’t just leave him alone—

and god fucking dammit, it just hurts so fucking much because he likes them all so, so much that he can’t even pretend not to anymore. he likes them all, and he wants them all to like him too, but with all the pestering they’ve been doing it just doesn’t feel like they do

and like, is this mean-spirited or not? he honestly can’t tell, he can’t read any of them at all on this, and it’s so strange because usually he can

and, and maybe, just maybe, it isn’t, maybe they’re just flirting or teasing or all in fun or whatever, but still it hurts

then if it truly is mean-spirited, can’t they just tell him and leave him to lick his wounds in private instead of popping up literally everywhere and scaring him half to death?

but whatever the reason behind it all, the subterfuge and the glances when they think he’s not looking and the weird emotion on their faces when they watch him hiss and try to grab his hat back and all the mixed signals he’s getting now are too too much and—

—and Janus, he knows how to be quiet. he knows how to tell a lie. if they want to hate him and pretend to get along around Thomas it’s fine, it’s nothing he hasn’t dealt with before

(it’ll hurt like a bitch but he’ll be fine)

((he’s lying to himself again he won’t be fine))

but he’s just getting so much attention, and so much of it is on his hair, one of the things he hates the most about himself, and he’s

he’s just so tired

and so Janus, with a heavy heart, starts straightening his hair every morning without fail

he lets his hair go all greasy and unwashed and unkempt and it hurts him to stop taking care of himself like that, but maybe, just maybe, if he does they’ll all lose interest in his hair and finally just stop

only the others are actually? really devastated?? and genuinely concerned???

and so all the other sides corner him and ask him why

in self-defense (but also out of hurt) he somewhat nastily comments something along the lines of “what, so you can’t make fun of it anymore, huh?”

and the others are hurt and there’s a bit of shouting and anger until someone comes out and admits that like,,, “no dude you’re literally the hottest/cutest of all of us and uhhh we all love you and kinda wanna date you lol”

and then Janus is like

uhm.

what.

everyone is reeling from the reveal, and oh so confused, so at Logan’s insistence they all take a big step back to calm down from the confrontation that just happened

Patton offers to go make some hot cocoa and warm up some brownies for everyone to help them all de-stress a little bit, and Logan bustles off after his boyf to help him

Virgil insists that Janus take a bath to get all clean, and he actually offers to help Janus bathe

(god, that’s such a flashback to when they were younger, when things were easier)

((Janus bites back a strangled, choked-up laugh as he remembers him, Virgil, and Remus all squished in a tub together as children, only back then it was the two of them trying to make Remus wash his hair, not vice versa))

and this time Virgil asks before touching him, offering to wash Janus’ hair for him to help get the week-and-a-half’s worth of grime out of it, and Janus is tired and the water is warm and Virgil is safe(?) so he says yes and

and oh

Virgil’s hands scratch up against his scalp, soft and feather-light, and it actually feels really, really...good

there in that tub, Janus slowly starts to relax for the first time in what feels like months

then, when he’s done washing Janus’ hair, Virgil leaves to let Janus have some time to relax and soak in private

Janus sits there in the tub, head tipped back against the cool porcelain, relishing in the warm water surrounding him

he still doesn’t really know why the other sides have been doing what they’ve been doing

but all the same, he’s not quite so anxious about what they’ve been doing anymore

surely if Virgil of all people has been so soft

surely things can’t be so bad as he had himself convinced

(maybe things can be okay after all?)

when Janus finally gets out of the bath, Roman and Remus are standing wordlessly outside the bathroom, holding out a ridiculously fuzzy pair of yellow-and-black pajamas with cartoon snakes for him

and there, on top of the pajamas, his hat

no, no, wait a minute

that isn’t his hat, it’s a...a new one

...for him?

Janus looks up at Roman, who nods, his expression surprisingly shy, then he looks over at Remus, who grins almost nervously at him, looking at him weirdly delicately

the bowler hat is clean and shiny and velvety and black, with a satin yellow ribbon at the brim just like his old one, only this new one has small polka-dots that, upon further inspection, are actually really, really tiny versions of all the sides’ different insignias—so that a little piece of them all can be with him, Roman explains, even when Janus doesn’t feel comfortable actually being in their presence

(he’s not really sure how he doesn’t break down at that, but Janus manages to hold out until after he’s swathed in fuzzy warmth and after he goes downstairs to talk things over with the others)

the six of them make themselves sit down in the living room and talk it all out over hot cocoa and warm mushy brownies

Janus opens up about how he hates his hair, how he wears his hat to hide how fluffy and soft it is, how he thought that they would never listen to him or take what he says seriously because of it, how scared he was that they were doing it because they hated him, how overwhelmed he was over them showing up everywhere and invading his space and taking his hat and playing with his hair without at least asking first

and the others explain that they were just trying to have fun and flirt with them. that first time they saw Janus’ hair he hadn’t even technically been accepted by them yet, but nevertheless, even back then they only wanted to comment on how soft it looked. on their side, it had been a bet—to see who could get Janus’ hat off again next, to see who could touch Janus’ hair first and figure out what it felt like—but then it had morphed into gay panic and them all falling for Janus, hard

Roman, Virgil, Patton, Logan, and Remus all apologize big-time to Janus

they assure him that they hadn’t meant anything bad over it, and that they really did love him and want to all be involved with him, and that they would never actively try to maliciously insult or tease him like that, and that they didn’t realize that he wasn’t just flirting back when he protested the whole hat thing

(which, Janus realizes that he kind of had been back in the beginning, just a little bit, before the teasing went way too far)

but just because the others hadn’t deliberately meant anything mean doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt him, nevertheless

so the five of them acknowledge and apologize for not realizing Janus’ discomfort and for not ensuring that the environment was one in which he felt safe in admitting his discomfort to them

and Janus admits that, now he knows for sure that it isn’t anything bad, he really doesn’t mind them touching his hair or any other part of him, really, but they really need to ask first, because things that feel nice some times don’t feel so nice other times

so they all have a nice long talk about boundaries and about how consent extends way past just sexual activity

and what kind of hurt/comfort fic would this be if Janus isn’t passed around everyone’s laps while everyone softly peppers kisses all over him and reassures him that they love him and they love his hair and they love his scales and they love his everything? so naturally that happens, and it’s all very very mushy and sweet and cavity-inducing

and everyone assures Janus that he and his hair are fully worthy of love and that they’re happy to love both even as he can’t bring himself to love himself just yet—if he’ll have them all, that is

and Roman + Virgil ask Janus to date them, and Logan + Remus + Patton ask him to date them too because yay gays and yay polyamory

and maybe Janus is crying a bit after the others admit that they actually really like how he looks, snake face, fluffy hair, and all, maybe he’s crying as he says that yes, he really does like them all and want to be with them

but he’s not about to admit it, of course

besides, he’s got his head turned to kiss Roman, soft and chaste and long and sweet, and Patton’s in his lap with hands under his shirt, gently rubbing just above his hipbones, and Virgil’s pressed against his side, holding his hand and squeezing carefully, and Remus is on the floor, curled around his calves and playing with the fuzz of his pajama pants, and Logan massages at the base of his neck even as his brand new hat sits perched atop his head

so Janus most certainly has an excuse for not admitting anything (or saying anything else, really) for a long, long while

Fin

Why is this literally over four thousand words what the fvck

Anyways, maybe one day I’ll write this like a proper fic, but in the meantime I wanted to share it as a bullet fic! :) If you want to create something yourself that’s based on this, be it writing or art or whatever, please feel free to! PLS do tag me tho bc fluffy-haired Janus is LIFE and I want to see it ALL. o.O

Want to be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

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yinxiong · 5 years ago

Note

do u have any anime recs?? ive only watched the popular ones like haikyuu, bnha and aot but its kinda overwhelming to look for new ones so im asking u since i know & trust that u have good taste

ooohhhhhh boyyyy im vibrating bc 1) you’re asking me for anime recs 2) yOU SAID I HAVE GOOD TASTE HDJK THANK 🥺💞

okay but being serious here ,,, i’m not sure exactly what genres you’re looking for so i’ll put a list of my favorites + other ones similar to those 3 you might enjoy :))) if you have anything specific in mind lmk !!! i recently compiled a list of everything i’ve watched / tried to watch (it’s quite embarrassing actually) so hopefully there’s something you’ll like on there 😊

fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood

genre: shounen, action, fantasy, women characters being badass

very brief summary: two boys learn alchemy and try to get their bodies back, ends up unravelling government conspiracy in the process

this is my all time favorite uhdfdjks

top tier, a masterpiece truly

i'd rate it 100/10 but it surpasses that honestly

it's just really REALLY good

might be a little bit slow in the beginning but trust me it picks up quickly

if you’re interested it’s originally a manga and has some more details the anime left out !!!

assassination classroom / ansatsu kyoushitsu

genre: shounen, school, action, kids being kids but with knives and guns

brief summary: a class of kids are assigned to kill a super monster before he blows up the earth in exactly one year - the catch is that he’s their homeroom teacher :D

basically kids learning how to be assassins but also trying to pass school and it's all very heartfelt and you WILL adopt them all

10/10 i cry every time

honestly watch this first it’s very easy to follow

also a manga with a few storylines the anime left out, not crucial but i recommend anyways since i read it first before the anime even came out and it just has a special place in my heart

noragami

genre: shounen, urban fantasy, gods being literal disasters someone pls help them

brief summary: a girl accidentally meets an unknown god and asks him for his help, slowly learns more about his world (i’m so sorry this is really vague but it’ll all be covered in the first episode trust me)

the gods can find spirits (dead people) and turn them into weapons if that’s cool

sexy animation !!!!!

only big flaw with the anime is that they mess up the main character’s characterization a little bit so you might want to read the manga? also only has two seasons and the manga is further along ,,, but everyone is currently stressed tf out over the plot ohmygod ,,,

gekkan shoujo nozaki-kun

genre: romantic comedy but heavy emphasis on comedy, slice of life, literal chaos

brief summary: a girl has a crush on a guy who turns out to be a manga artist, she winds up being his assistant (this barely covers it though)

a bunch of high school kids being chaotic and oblivious

just watch it i can’t really explain it in words you’ll be laughing a lot

only one season so if you enjoy there’s also more chaos in the manga

your lie in april / shigatsu wa kimi no uso

genre: shoujo, classical music !!!!

brief summary: a former piano prodigy who no longer plays because he can’t hear music meets a violinist that brings color into his life once again

look

this is top tier

so beautiful hhdjfdks

i watched this on my new tv and shed real tears

as a pianist/musician i adore it a lot hhhhh the pieces they chose to play are all the favs (i performed a medley with my violinist friend for a show once hahahah)

a little sad tho beware of feels

the opening song is like . so freaking well known omg

akame ga kill!

genre: shounen, action, lots of fighting and blood, war

brief summary: a boy joins a group of assassins who are working to overthrow the shithole government (yea sounds kind of basic but there’s more to it)

mainly just girls with weapons

i mean there’s guys too but the girls are the best characters

the weapons are lowkey magical too

yea this is where my nickname came from lol

the anime gets a 7/10 but the manga probably 8/10

manga is darker, more graphic but better plotwise

no game no life

genre: shounen, a bit of ecchi ugh, lots of mind games

brief summary: two genius gamer siblings get transported to a world where everything is decided by games, they decide they want to beat god

very colorful and pretty animation!!!!

there’s some questionable “fanservice” moments but ignoring that the plot is legit

only one season tho :(( pls it was so popular when it came out where is s2

there is a movie prequel, a lot more angsty but still vv good

ao haru ride

genre: shoujo, the usual high school romance, slice of life

brief summary: a girl meets the guy she used to have a crush on, only to find that his personality has completely changed (she has too though)

insert falling back in love

one of the shoujo classics haha

i binged this in one night a few weeks ago

not sure if it was worth it but i had fun lmao

just a low stakes cute anime

also very pretty

only 12 eps, the manga finishes later

given

genre: just music boys being gay lol (jk it’s kind of sad)

brief summary: a boy learns to move on from his ex by joining a band (this is possibly the shittiest summary ever but i dont wanna give anything away hdjhkjs)

just watch it lmao it’ll make sense

idiot boys

band boys !!!

feels but not overwhelming

the comedy is top notch though

i adore given so much hhjkdf waiting for the movie to come out

THE MUSIC IS SO GOOD

all the songs are on spotify i listen to them way too much

yuri on ice

genre: figure skaters being gay that’s all you need to know

brief summary: a figure skater falls into a slump, somehow winds up with the top skater as his coach (yet another shitty summary sorry)

hmm this isn’t actually one of my favorites but it’s popular enough so why not

i just really love figure skating hfjdks

it’s pretty accurate i’d say! there are even easter eggs of top men skaters irl hahah

definitely dramatized lol

but still pretty fun

bungou stray dogs

genre: shounen, urban fantasy, very dapper mafia / detectives

brief summary: a kid on the run after getting kicked out of his orphanage accidentally saves a detective, shit goes down from there

pretty fun as you learn about their powers, watch them solve mysteries

the fighting is cool too

until the machine guns appear ugh i just tune that part out

oh yea all the characters are named for actual literary figures and i didnt realize until s2 💀

fairy tail

genre: shounen, magic/fantasy, action, friends !!!!!

brief summary: just mages in guilds going on quests lolol what more do you want

fr it’s honestly quite chill

like there’s definitely an ongoing plot and lots of subplots / arcs

but it’s very character driven

so many cool character designs

was OBSESSED w this in middle school ,,, highkey embarrassing omg

one of the big anime/manga, if you like bnha i’m sure you’ll have fun with fairy tail

this was a stupidly long list and im clearly way too excited ,,, if you have any questions or just want to scream about any of these, my inbox is always open ;)))

#ask #anon #anime recs #plsss im a weeb #ive definitely lost followers over it #but idc anymore #tysm for this ask ily

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lxiewrites · 6 years ago

Text

Capture the Flag

The complete fic of the PJO au from klance au month

also tumblr decided to take out most if not p much all my italics but i’m too lazy to put them allll back in bc I’m an italics ho and there would be a lot

Ao3

Lance scrutinized the stance of the baby warrior in front of him. Circling around the young half-blood he kicked her right foot farther behind her. “You would have a better center of balance if you place your right foot here—you're right-handed right?”

She adjusted her stance and nodded, gripping her sword tighter in her fist, hand shaking a bit with effort. Lance bit down a sympathetic smile. She was a fresh camper; just dropped off by a satyr a few days ago. He could see the embarrassed flush on her cheeks and her eyes darting to the other campers practicing their sword fighting.

“Okay, so loosen your grip a bit. That much tension ends up straining the tendons in your elbow for whatever reason, trust me.” He scooped his sword up from the dusty ground next to her and took his stance. “Okay, let’s start with the basic attack.”

They took a step in sync, swiping their swords down with one hand slicing the air in front of them. Nadia blocked her invisible opponent with her wooden shield while Lance brought his sword up in a block. Together they sliced down once again, the air whooshing at the speed. Stepping back into formation Lance turned to his pupil with a big grin. “Good! With enough practice you’ll be beating flying pigs and hellhounds.”

Nadia offered him a small smile before biting her lip. Dropping her sword, point down, into the dirt she asked, “Could I just… skip capture the flag tonight?”

He wrapped an arm around her slight shoulders. “Sorry, kid, Coran says the best teacher is experience. And our cabin is leading this time. Our own members can’t just sit out!”

“But--!” Nadia objected, gesturing helplessly to Lucas and Katy painting each others nails off to the side of the arena. One or two more of the others dropped off from practicing and went to relax and gossip in the shade, only a few still sparring on the field.

Lance ran a hand through his hair to cup the back of his neck, sheepishly smiling at the baffled twelve-year-old. “Okay, so they’re more lovers than fighters. We’re a work in progress; sue me. But I got a feeling about you, Nadia. We’re Aphrodite cabin, we can go to fight just like anyone else, we just look better doing it.” He winked to punctuate his statement but she still looked skeptical. Finally he rolled his eyes, “Fine,I got Hecate cabin, Demeter, Athena, and the Apollo kids. And,” he said, raising his voice to be heard across the entire arena, catching the attention from their other cabin members. “If we win I’ll treat everyone to a spa day with my special face masks.”

When the clang of swords resumed, enough that they echoed around them, he snickered, not noticing the person that crept up behind him.

“So that’s how you get your team motivated. Bribery.”

Startled, Lance yelped as he spun around, shoving Nadia behind him, sword at the ready. His sword clanged against a familiar knife that extended into a sword, the dull side barely grazing his cheek.

Lance smirked, dropping his sword and smoothly ducking under Keith’s, bringing him in very close to the son of Ares. Close enough he could smell cedar and smoke from the offering fire. “You’re just jealous you can’t get your cabin to be a team on anything.”

Raising a brow Keith looked around the arena, probably taking in every flaw, every sloppy stance or messy attack. “At least my cabin can fight.”

Frowning, Lance crossed his arms. He debated firing back, saying that they’re doing their best or even taking a jab at Keith’s cabin. Instead he stepped aside, out of Keith’s space, to introduce his new recruit.

“Keith, meet Nadia of Aphrodite cabin. Nadia, this is Keith, head of Ares cabin.”

Lance watched how Keith’s stance softened, the corners of his mouth quirking up in a small smile. Biting down hard on his lips Lance forcibly turned to watch Nadia tentatively shake Keith’s hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Keith nodded, respectfully and still stupidly soft. “You too, Nadia.”

Clearing his throat Lance jerked his head towards Virgil who was getting disarmed way too many times in a row. “Hey, Nadia, why don’t you go over there and spar with Virg?”

Nadia’s hazel eyes darted from one head counselor to another before scurrying off to the struggling thirteen-year-old.

Watching her go, pointedly not looking at the other counselor Lance asked, “So, have you come here to check out the competition, Kogane?”

“Something like that,” Keith murmured.

Heat flushing through him, Lance bit down on his lip. He willed his cheeks to cool, unprepared for Keith’s answer. They’ve known each other for four years. They went on their first quest together, fought together, bickered, picked strawberries, did all the stupid camp activities dangerous and mundane. They didn’t do this! They didn’t… flirt. They fought, they pushed, they challenged each other. Ever since they went on their last quest to retrieve his mom’s girdle—which was really just a fancy belt that shifted to an accessory that would compliment the wearer’s outfit, kinda lame—Keith’s been… flirty.

And it’s not in Lance’s head! He’s the son of the goddess of love and beauty he knows when someone’s flirting! And furthermore, he knew Keith. He knows when Keith is being flirty, which is so subtle he normally won’t notice but—

He knows. It’s exactly like that time he was flirting with this one guy two years ago when they were going to fix whatever was happening with Iris. Gods he was so annoying, always ”mission first, Lance” and the first guy to show interest in him and he’s all ”Oh, I like your weapon” “that’s a cool knife”.

And recently he’s been looking for him for help with strategies against other cabins or partnering up with him. Somehow their stupid fights seem more lingering, softer, the rough edges sanded down to a fine grain like the beaches back home. Where Lance can’t help but stay and run his fingers over it in fascination.

And he has no idea how to handle it.

Face, unfortunately still hot, Lance said, “Well, you better watch your back, Keith. ‘Cuz Ares cabin is going down.”

Keith scoffed, eyes twinkling, “Maybe you should worry less on Ares cabin and more on your own.”

“Oh, my cabin is great. We’re a well-oiled machine. We got everything down to a science.”Lance ignored the fact he could see some of his siblings in the corner of his eye, stopping to look at them. Lucas and Katy whispering to each other and snickering. “We’re gonna whoop your ass, and I’m going to gloat it over you until the end of the summer.”

“Sure, Lance.”

“Hey, once upon a time Aphrodite was worshipped as a war goddess as well as love. Don’t underestimate us. Aphrodite cabin is gonna whoop your ass!” Behind him there was a weak cheer from his siblings and Lance had to restrain a sigh.

“Sounds like a lotta talk.”

Okay, he’s had it up to here with him. “I bet you that we whoop your butt!”

Keith paused, giving Lance enough time to hear what he just came out of his godsdamned mouth and regret. “Okay,” Keith drawled, “it’s a bet.”

“Fine! What’s the bet?”

Keith shrugged, the obnoxious orange T-shirt stretching over his shoulders. “I don’t know. I’ll think of something later.” Smirking, Keith started towards the exit, calling out, “Good luck with the troops, Lance!”

When he disappeared Lance buried his face in his hands, groaning in them.

From the side he could hear Katy shout, “Does this mean no face masks?”

Lance sighed as he adjourned the meeting with the other head counselors. Many were skeptical when he proposed the strategy to them, Pidge kept interjecting with other strategies—those Athena kids are such know-it-alls—but he was insistent.

He knew Keith and he knew how he worked. Impulsive, direct, but crafty and a quick adaptable thinker. He might play at strategy for a while but it won’t last long until he rushes in.

Lance has faith in his team. They might be outnumbered and facing against the kids of the god of war but they got this! They totally got this! Keith might have the numbers and strength but Lance and his ragtag group got the razzle-dazzle!

He made his way to the mess hall to devote some more garlic knots to his mom for some divine luck in capture the flag. He had full faith in his team but some godly help couldn’t hurt.

At the mess hall, he made the rounds from table to table, not staying too long for Coran to start pointedly clearing his throat. Most of the cabins he convinced to be on the side of love were because a) he was just that good or b) either they owed him a favor or he now owes them a favor. The only reason Hephaestus cabin was on Ares’s side was because Keith got to Hunk first damnit. And he saved his life during that fight with a giant pig but whatever.

He cornered his own cabin when Katy just got back from the offering fire. Bracing both hands on the table he looked at each member of his cabin in the eye. “You all know your roles?”

There seemed to be a simultaneous eye-roll across the table. Sophie waved her freshly manicured hand as if she was shooing a bug away. “Yes, yes, we all know what to do. Honestly, Lance, you’re way too into this game.”

Lucas snorted into his cup. “Oh, I don’t think it’s the game he’s into,” he said wagging his brows.

Giggles rose up around the table, each of his half-siblings chiming in at what that could possibly be. The only one not sticking their unwanted concealed nose into his love life was Nadia, who was a dear angel child who did not know what anyone was talking about.

Lance, face way too hot, closed his eyes and willed the blush from his face. Snatching a piece of garlic bread from Katy’s plate he chucked it at Lucas and hit him square between the brows. Lance turned to Nadia as Lucas was screeching about the grease and acne.

He looked into her hazel eyes and wiggled his brows, making her giggle. Crouching down he asked, “So, are you ready for capture the flag?”

She bit her lip, frowning so hard creases formed between her brows. “I don’t think I’ll be good at it.” She turned to look at him, eyes big and pleading, using every bit of what she inherited from their mother. “Do I have to play?”

Lance gave her a sympathetic smile, hand brushing her soft, brown hair from her face and tucking it up into her bun. “Unless you’re injured you gotta play, kid, Coran says.” At her silence he sighed and darted his eyes around, lowering his voice in a conspiratorial whisper he gestured for her to get closer. “Listen, I got a really important job for you during the capture the flag alright?”

At her nod he leaned in to whisper her directions, her shoulders relaxed and she even chuckled. Patting her on the shoulder he stood up. “All you gotta do is stick with Romelle and you should be fine.”

He gave the rest of his giggling siblings a look, using the universal signal for ‘I’m watching you’ by jabbing two fingers at all of them. “Remember. No face masks unless we win.”

After a chorus of boos he left, restraining himself to only stick his tongue out instead of flipping them off because there are children.

“Real mature for a head counselor.”

Lance, for the record, did not squeak. He yelped. A very manly yelp. “Keith! What are you doing here!”

Keith scrunched up his face, nose wrinkling like a little bunny instead of the son of a war god. “It’s…the mess hall?”

Lance felt his face heat, from his cheeks to the tips of his ears. Spluttering he grabbed Keith by the shoulders, turned him around, and shoved him out of the mess hall.

Now, Keith might be mostly made out of solid muscle but he’s also a seventeen-year-old boy and Lance had witnessed him try to talk to a squirrel because he thought it was a type of dyad. Lance, similarly, has been on nearly every one of Keith’s quests and has just as much muscle. Moving him was not an issue.

The issue was feeling that muscle under his hands. How easily Keith let Lance maneuver him when sometimes he didn’t move his stubborn butt even for Coran. How stupidly adorable his face is, all scrunched up and cute.

It made Lance’s stomach twist and sweat in uncomfortable places and that was the issue.

“Nope! Nope, nuh-uh, I know what you’re doing. You’re trying to steal our strategy! Not happening buster.”

Keith’s face slowly shifted from a confused bunny to a smug bastard. He tried to press his mouth in a line but Lance could see his smirk. Whenever Keith tried to not-smile he would get damning dimples on each of his cheeks. And there they were! Damning Lance to Tartarus.

At his glare Keith gave up, lips tilting into a full smirk, one dimple disappearing. “If you’re so worried maybe you should just give up now.”

Lance stabbed a finger in his smug, stupid face. “Oh, you would like that wouldn’t you? Just wait, you’re going to eat those words.”

“I guess we’ll just have to find out won’t we?”

Cheeks burning for no good reason Lance opened his mouth to say something… only to find he had no words. Just a burning face and a heart beating way too fast.

Normally, Keith would fight back, say something just as petty and childish as Lance. Now, he fights back in a way that Lance can’t? Instead of pushing back he gives in and flipping sneak attacks him leaving Lance flustered and burning.

Smirking, Keith patted Lance on the chest before brushing past him to the mess hall, leaving Lance gaping at him still trying to find his words.

Lance helped slide a chest plate over one of the younger Hecate kid’s heads, securing the straps nice and tight. With that done he tied a blue handkerchief around their arm in a neat knot. The kid beamed up at him before scampering off somewhere. Their smile a shade bloodthirsty but that’s what he wanted to see! Furious little warriors that will kick Keith’s butt!

“Are you sure you don’t want me on the front lines?” A voice wheedled behind him.

Lance tipped his head back and groaned to the gods. “For the last time Romelle, I need you to hang back.” Leaning forward he lowered his voice, “I really need you to watch Nadia.”

Romelle threw up her hands, a whining noise escaping. “You’re putting me on babysitting duty? What if you break a leg? If I’m with you I could swoop in and cast a healing spell! Or, or, boost you with extra speed or strength and save the day! Oh, oh!” Lance took three quick steps back when the daughter of Hecate’s hands flew up in excitement, magic crackling off her fingers. “I’ve been working on some offense spells and this levitation spell. If I get close enough to Keith I could just levitate him and bam!”

Lance silently prayed to the gods to shut the girl up. “Romelle, please just watch Nadia?” Lance widened his eyes and laid it on thick. “You’re the only one that I can trust to protect her.”

Her lip pushed out in a pout, huffing, she crossed her arms and turned away. “Fine. But you are wasting my talents.”

“And I will forever regret it.”

She rolled her eyes, popping out her hip and pinning him with a stare. “I know you’re mocking me but you will regret it. And when you lose against Keith you’ll have no one to blame but yourself and I will laugh.”

Lance huffed and spluttered before settling on a stilted laugh. ”Ha, ahahaha, ha. No. Because I will beat Keith because I know him better than anyone here and therefore know the best way to defeat him!”

“Yeah but doesn’t that mean that he knows how to defeat you?”

“W-well, in theory—“

“Which is why you should put me in front He’ll never see it coming!”

Irritation grated on Lance’s last nerve as she rambled on. He loved Romelle and she was a key player in his plan but by gods she was annoying to deal with sometimes. She was two years younger than him and just as annoying as he was then. To a point she reminded him of himself, except more cringe—but that might just be him.

“—In fact, you should bring me with you to keep you from getting distracted by your crush on Keith—“

“Woah, woah, no, wrong,” Lance interrupted, taking Romelle by the shoulders and physically turning her and walking her forward. “No, nope, there’s no crush and you have your position. Just stay with Nadia and make sure she stays out of trouble.”

“—But!”

Lance pushed her forward towards where Nadia was fumbling with her shoulder straps. “Bye!”

Ignoring her complains he turned on his heel and marched away. Romelle was a sweet kid with ideas too big for her brain, and some of them were completely ridiculous! Him? Letting a crush ruin this? Nah, this has been in the works since Keith first flattened him on his back the first day of training. Sure, the rivalry might have not been at the forefront, especially with the last few quests but it’s still there! And it will continue to be there until Lance beats Keith.

Crush or no crush he will defeat Keith Kogane.

Lance waited in the front of his troops, the point in a semi-angular formation. He could barely make out the speck of red in the distance. The enemy’s flag.

He swallowed, feeling stones in his throat, pressing, making it harder to breathe. Sweat beaded up under his armor as he waited for Coran to blow the whistle, making his orange T-shirt cling to his chest under his chest plate.

As he stared at his goal with his friends and allies behind him he could almost feel his heart rate calm. He had a rock solid plan and a secret weapon. He knew Keith inside and out. In fact, Keith was probably snapping at James or Rebecca for poking at his plans.

Today was the day he was finally going to prove, at least to himself, that he could keep up with Keith.

The whistle blew and he could feel his lungs expand with humid air as he and team shouted, charging into the forest.

Lance’s heart pounded in his chest as his team broke into groups. Each group disappearing in the foliage and leaving the sword-competent veteran kids in front.

He and the first line of defense battled through the first wave of campers, the red handkerchiefs fluttering like butterfly wings with each disarmed kid. He let Francesca of Athena’s cabin organize a small troop to tie them up, uncurling a length of rope from her enchanted fanny pack—which, normally, hideous, now, very useful.

Lance scanned the woods around them, so far no one in sight. He could hear the sounds of fighting in the distance, the clashing of swords and the dull thuds of weapons against shields. They couldn’t be more than a fourth of a mile away. His nose stung from the scent of smoke, someone—probably a Hephaestus kid—launching Greek fire at someone smoke rising off to the left of him.

“I’m going on ahead. Stand your ground here and wait for the archers to move up.”

Francesca didn’t look up from where she was tying up the other team. “Shall we proceed as normal or send reinforcements to—“ she nodded in the direction of the plume of black smoke.

Lance was already jogging ahead through the trees. “Send three of the archers over and go ahead!” he called over his shoulder.

Further away there was another explosion, more kids shouting in either fear or indignation. It seems like Keith didn’t waste time in bringing out the big guns. The quickest route is a straight line, after all.

He sprinted forward, uncaring to see if his group followed him, he was a man on a mission. Bursting through the trees and into a small clearing—that was smack dab in the middle way of the two flags—he shouted and brought his drawn sword down.

Another sword screeched against his as he stared right into the shocked eyes of Keith Kogane, close enough to see the whites of his eyes and the enlarged pupils surrounded by a galaxy of colors. They narrowed in concentration as he pushed against the sword. Lance smirking as he let him throw him off.

Keith didn’t look particularly surprised, maybe disgruntled at how Lance attacked first but not from his presence. Keith might be direct in his battle tactics but he was never one to search for glory for himself (something Lance learned about him after, oh, the fifth adventure he went on with him). He probably had another group headed for the flag but Lance wasn’t worried. They were fine.

Lance casually swung his sword around, twisting his wrist in what only looked like a complicated maneuver. “Surprised, Mullet? Thought I’d bring the fight to you this time.”

Keith lunged forward and swiped at Lance, making him dance back. Advancing, Keith slashed at Lance; his attacks practiced and smooth. Lance could barely keep up as he deflected each attack, each hit jolting his wrist making it ache.

Just as his back hit a tree he used his sword to guide Keith’s momentum from his swing to the tree trunk, his sword embedded into the bark above Lance’s head.

Keith panted, his chest heaving in his T-shirt, not even wearing any armor—the idiot. Sweat dripped from his temple and his eyes were lit up as a smile played at the corners of his mouth. “What fight?”

Lance felt his face screw up and his heart speed up as anger and adrenaline mixed in a dangerous cocktail in his chest. “Oh, screw you.”

And he punched Keith in the stomach.

Keith’s wheezed as his breath left him, hand slacking on the handle of his sword. Lance kicked his chest, pushing him away and losing his grip on the blade. Lance tore the blade from the tree and threw it on the ground in front of him, face hot and chest tight.

“I might not be the greatest half-blood of this generation but I’m just as good a fighter as you,” Lance gritted out, heart drumming against his breastbone.

“What?” Keith wheezed, reaching out to grab his sword, stumbling to a stand.

It took a minute for everything to catch up to him but when it did Lance felt the adrenaline dip down, leaving him shaky but there’s just enough for him to say what’s been bothering him.

“We have been on practically every quest together since we came here when we were twelve. You lead practically every quest, you’re the best fighter, you are… so hard to chase after. I just—“ Lance wanted to look away. He wanted to look away from the realization flickering across Keith’s face. He swallowed hard and kept his head up. “I just want you to take me seriously for once.”

“Lance,” Keith started, eyes scrunching up, nose wrinkling. “What are you talking about? I always take you seriously.”

Lance sighed, shoulders slumping. “Dude—“ He barely heard the whistling of air, his arm moving before he fully registered the action. His sword clanged against a familiar sword, diverting its path from his face.

“Dude! What the fuck?!” he shouted at Keith.

Keith was already on the move, running toward where Lance knocked his sword and scooping it up before running at him.

Lance blocked when Keith slashed down, the contact reverberating down his arm. They pushed against each other, swords sliding, the screech of metal on metal grating Lance’s ears.

“I always take you seriously,” Keith gritted out before dancing back on light feet. “Why do I always choose you to be on the quests with me?”

“I don’t know,” Lance snapped back, out of breath, stepping back in to swipe at Keith’s leg, barely nicking the fabric of his jeans when he dodged. “Because Coran told you to.”

“No you, dumbass.” They circled each other; eyes open for any opening in their defenses. Keith went on the offense, sprinting forward to aim at the vulnerable parts of Lance not covered by his breastplate.

Lance caught Keith’s sword with his own, locking them together and wrenching Keith’s sword out of his hand. Before he could swing his sword around Keith tackled him to the ground. Lance hit the ground hard, sword falling somewhere and the breath knocked out of him, making him wheeze.

Keith sitting on his stomach didn’t help him with the breathing situation. A hand was wrapped around his wrist and another on his shoulder, pinning him down. Lance gasped for breath, neck straining as Keith was haloed above him like some sort of godsdamned angel.

“I choose you,” he panted, “because you always have my back. I trust you.”

Keith’s expression was fierce. Brows furrowed and lips pressed in a firm line, ready to attack if Lance dared to disagree with him. His eyes were flitting over his face, searching, open.

The trick with Keith is that his scowly face and general grumpy body language only made him look like a closed book locked in a box in an underground safe. His eyes were what gives him away every time, which is why he never wins the poker nights with any of the Hermes kids. That and he sucked at lying.

Lance huffed out a laugh, head falling back to the ground with a soft thunk. He convinced himself for years that when he and Keith were equal then he’d be good enough. He spent so much time trying to convince himself and others that he was just as good as Keith when, apparently, Keith always thought he was.

Gods, he just… really liked him.

“Why are you laughing?” Keith demanded, “I’m being serious here.”

Lance quieted until he had a big, goofy grin stretched across his cheeks. Keith was still glaring at him from where he was sitting on his stomach. “I know you are.” He closed his eyes and groaned. “Gods, I’m so stupid.”

Keith’s mouth twisted like he ate a lemon. He eased the pressure on Lance’s wrist and shoulder, settling back onto the bone of his pelvis. “What was this about, Lance?”

“How about I tell you after I beat you?” Lance taunted, smirking up at him.

“I’m on top of you. I think that ship s—gah!”

Lance braced his feet against the ground, thrusting his pelvis up and jostling Keith into a tabletop position above him, his right arm still trapped but Keith’s left hand slipped to press into the dirt by Lance’s head. He used the opportunity to use his left arm to hug the one trapping his wrist at the elbow. Planting his left foot on the other side of the leg Keith has pressed against his side he pushed, toppling Keith over and landing between his thighs.

Keith was disoriented enough to allow Lance to swipe his sword from where it fell, hovering the blade above Keith’s throat.

Lance leaned over the demigod under him, his hair just long enough to fall forward and tickle his ears. He braced his hand against Keith’s shoulder, keeping him pinned just in case. His sword was close enough that with one sudden move Keith would need a medic and a ton of ambrosia.

Keith’s eyes were wide, darting back and forth between the blade and his eyes. Lance pressed harder on his shoulder. He didn’t want to actually hurt him but he still wasn’t about to lose either.

His cheeks were pink and he licked his lips, opening his mouth to speak when the woods erupted in cheers around them.

Lance straightened, head twisting around to see if he could see whose team was cheering. “Wait, who won?”

He stood up and wandered to the edge of the clearing. Where was his team? Godsdamn someone just tell him who won!

Behind him, Keith stood up, face hidden by his bangs as he dusted himself off. Combing his fingers through his hair Keith walked over. “Can you see the banner from here?”

Lance sighed and shook his head. The trees had too much cover and they were in a little dip between the two flags. Wherever he looked it was just more and more trees.

The cheering got louder, the trees shaking with celebration. From the direction of Keith’s base, a small crowd of screaming kids from the Ares and Hephaestus cabin surged through the foliage. Seeing Keith they cheered even louder, nearly popping Lance’s eardrums.

Crowding around them they grabbed onto Keith and hoisted him in the air, chanting.

Behind him, he felt a couple of hands on his shoulders. Lucas’s mouth was twisted in a rueful smile, squeezing his shoulder. Katy next to him, arms crossed and hair a mess of twigs and mud.

It took a hot second for everything to process. The exuberant cheers from the other team and how his own was tolerating it.

“We lost?” Katy sighed, chest moving with how deep it was, and nodded. She dug into her hair and flicked out a berry. Disbelief filled his entire being; he could feel his eyebrows crawl to the top of his forehead. “How?” He gestured to Keith who was finally being put down from his grinning team. “I had everything planned. I know him so well I might as well had his plans!”

“Lance,” Keith called, lips quirking at the side, head tilted slightly and eyes surprisingly soft. “You forget. I know you just as well as you know me.”

Lance pouted as he turned his marshmallow. The bonfire in front of him an excited red, so bright it could probably be seen from space. That color definitely came from the Ares kids, they were celebrating enough for the whole camp.

He wasn’t upset per se but he wasn’t exactly jumping for joy. He wasn’t bright red happy. Maybe a muted orange or a consolatory yellow—godsdamnit! He was so sure they would win!

He couldn’t help the pout on his lips as he let the marshmallow fall off to sizzle in the fire with a wet plop. Poking around the fire, letting the tip of his stick catch fire and watching it burn, he didn’t notice the presence that literally popped in next to him.

He jerked as Romelle and Nadia materialized into existence next to him. ”Holy Hera, don’t do that!” Romelle pouted at him, crossing her arms as she flickered in and out of existence like static. An ace bandage was slapped on her forehead and a Hello Kitty Band-Aid was barely hanging on to her chin.

Nadia settled in next to him, slowly becoming solid as Romelle’s magic wore off. He handed her a fresh marshmallow.

Romelle stomped closer, still not saying anything but clearly saying something. He eyed her warily as she glared at him, the flickering slowing down until she was fully solid. He bit the bullet.

“You couldn’t have done that during capture the flag?” he snipped at her.

Her hand shot out before he even registered her moving, smacking him on the head. “You couldn’t have told me I was a part of your little scheme?!”

“That’s because you can’t keep a secret for sh—“ Lance cut himself off and placed his hands on either side of Nadia’s head, ignoring her insulted look. “Shit,” he mouthed over her head.

Nadia smacked his hands off her head exclaiming that she knew what swear words were. She reached around him and snagged another marshmallow or three. Her voice was a little muffled as she tried to speak with her cheeks full like a little chipmunk. “When we were separated we were hit by green balls of fire. Romelle saved me but she was knocked out.”

Romelle gingerly touched her bandage, a dejected smile touching her lips. At his look she waved off his concern before squinting her eyes at him in a playful glare. “Next time, McClain, let me in on the plan instead of having your sister tell me when we’re under attack by Greek fire.”

Lance winced. “Sorry about that, won’t do it again.” He looked between Romelle and Nadia. “Other than that you two were okay?”

“Oh yeah!” Romelle exclaimed, waving her arm in a grand gesture as if to brush off his concern but only making it look like she was swatting at a mosquito. “When we were under attack I went bwoosh and Nadia was like aahhh, but in a good way. She even got a hit in before we were captured!”

“Yeah?” Lance looked over to where Nadia was blushing. “So you had a good first capture the flag?”

She looked over at him, dark cheeks still flushed with color from Romelle’s praise. “Green balls of fire,” she deadpanned.

Lance sighed, resigned and not willing to push it. She isn’t the first Aphrodite kid to be more of a lover than a fighter. And if she didn’t like it there wasn’t much he could do about it.

“…But it was fun.”

Lance felt his eyebrows climb up his forehead, a grin spreading over his face. “Really?”

With a tiny smile, Nadia nodded.

“I’m glad, Chiquita,” Lance said reaching over to ruffle her hair.

“We can totally pair up in the future,” Romelle added giving Nadia a side hug. “Now that we got a good strategy!”

Lance rolled his eyes. “Romelle, Keith already knows what I was planning. That was how he knocked you out.”

With a heavy sigh, Romelle crossed her arms and popped out a hip. “Ugh, that guy. He knows you too well.”

“Five years will do that.”

They all jerked to the new voice, Nadia releasing a little “eep” of surprise.

Keith settled in next to him on the log bench, legs stretched out in front of him with his hands tucked into a red zip-up over his orange Camp Half-Blood T-shirt. The fire reflecting in his eyes in reds and pinks, turning his normally blue eyes purple, as he soaked up its warmth. He had the barest touch of a smirk on his face. “You’re gonna have to work harder than that to surprise me.”

A few years back Lance would immediately think that Keith was mocking him. Rubbing the fact that he lost in his face and he would never be better than him. And, to be honest, a little voice still nags at him about it. At certain times like after losing a match or Keith being chosen for a quest. Telling him that he would never be able to be good enough, to catch up, be his equal.

But that voice has quieted. Because he knows Keith better and he knows himself better. He’s not a scared eleven-year-old running away from monsters that chased him out of his bed.

That doesn’t mean he’ll take his smack talk lying down.

“Hmm, mmhm, says the guy who I defeated today. Remember that? You know, when you were pinned down with your own sword to your throat? Hmmm?” Lance goaded, leaning ever so closer, smug smile on his face.

Red spread across Keith’s face, all the way to his ears and down his neck. “You just caught me off guard!” he shot back.

“Uh huh,” Lance was close enough to see the faint flecks of purple in Keith’s eyes. Could see how soft and smooth his skin was. A dumb, impulsive voice telling him to cup his cheek and run his thumb across it to see just how soft his skin was. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

Keith scowled, lips pursing into a pout. “Whatever.” He pulled back, just an inch, and looked away, the color rising in his cheeks. “I wanted to talk to you. In—“ his eyes looked away, glancing over all the eyes on them, “private.”

Lance’s heart drummed against his breastbone. An unsteady beat that threw him off balance, unable to get back on his feet. They were too close. His heart was too fast. He had too many feelings. There were too many—

“Kiss, kiss, kiss!” A group of, unfortunately, familiar sounding voices chanted.

—people.

Lance grimaced and buried his face to hide from the world. Could a magical earthquake open up underneath him and swallow him up, please? Like right now? Where are the gods when you need them?!

Godsdamnit, he was reconsidering on the no-facemasks but not anymore those ungrateful demigods. His siblings are the worst.

Lance stood up, cheeks hot, embarrassment making his chest tight. “Come on, Keith.” He stuffed his hands in his jeans and stalked off towards the lake, ignoring the suggestive catcalls as they left.

It wasn’t a full moon but there was enough light that he could make his way down to the dock easily. The lights from the cabins fading away as the half-moon guided him to where he could think without eyes on him.

“You wanted to talk, yeah?” Lance finally asked, knowing the answer. He slowed to a stop as they approached the lake. “I’m sorry if they embarrassed you.” In his peripheral Keith shrugged.

“I don’t care what they say.”

Lance nodded, watching how the moon’s reflection wavered in the water. The silence that fell over them wasn’t uncomfortable. Just…heavy. Heavy with a lot of things left unsaid. And things that should be. He sat down on the dock, legs dangling over the edge. Keith sat down next to him.

“Are you,” Keith started in this halting, careful way of his whenever he’s dealing with Lance’s emotions. Like every word to be weighed and judged before being deemed adequate. “Okay?”

Lance sighed, trying to get some of the poison out, his chest feeling a little bit lighter for it. “I’m cool. They’re just… so fucking dumb.”

Keith snorted. “They can’t be worse than my cabin. There’s a mutiny every single day. At least your cabin respects you and listens to you.”

“Oh, oh, oh, Keith, my man, my dude, you don’t know the psychological horrors my siblings would put you through.”

Keith side-eyed him, a smirk play on his lips. “Yeah… but you seem to handle it pretty well.”

Lance… couldn’t argue with that. He tipped his head back and groaned to the stars and the moon. ”Ugh, why are you so mature and shit?”

The low chuckled sent a shiver down Lance’s spine. He crossed his arms to make it look like it was because of the cold. “I don’t know, patience yields—“

“—focus,” Lance finished. Lance shook his head. “Gods, Shiro, off adventuring and still finding ways to make us mature adults.”

“I wouldn’t say that college in New Rome is an adventure—“

“It so is an adventure!” Lance leaned forward, eyes just as big as his smile as he tried to inject some of his enthusiasm into Keith’s grumpy butt. “It’s college. A couple of years ago that wouldn’t have been an option for us. Come on, man, just imagine it, going to classes, sleeping in a dorm, getting a degree. I bet you, you would have the time of your life.”

Keith bit his lip, brow furrowed and too slow in disguising his emotions from Lance of all people. His face smoothed out into bland indifference.

“So, speaking about bets,” Keith prompted, a touch too neutral.

Lance examined Keith’s face. Watched how despite his neutral tone and how indifferent he tried to come across the muscle in his jaw still jumped and the tense muscles around his eyes asked him to leave the subject for another day. He slumped back, shoulders dropping as he whined, “what kind of horribly embarrassing thing do you want me to do? Clean out the Pegasus stalls? Follow you around with a sign that says ‘Keith is the greatest?’”

He heard a snort next to him and he felt a small thrill of victory. A smile peeked through as Keith shook his head, face relaxed once again. He cleared his throat and turned towards Lance, the color high in his cheeks.

“You have to…” Keith trailed off, the muscles in his face twitching with little micro expressions that Lance couldn’t name. “You have to… uh, I want—“ Keith’s lips twisted into a pained grimace.

Lance smirked, “You having some difficulties there, buddy?”

Keith huffed out a breath, blowing his bangs out of his red-stricken face. ”No, I just don’t want to force you to do something you don’t want to do.”

His shoulders shook from his laughter. That was so on-brand for Keith Lance isn’t even surprised. “That’s the point, man. That’s what a bet is. Making someone do something they don’t want to do.”

“Well, I don’t want to make you do what you don’t want to do.” The spots of color high on Keith’s cheeks seemed to glow brighter as his back straightened, his honor and noble-ness no doubt bolstering him. Like a knight. It would be stupid if it weren’t so attractive.

Lance smothered a smile that was starting to creep up, though Keith could probably hear it in his voice. “How about… you tell me what it is or whatever. And if I’m, like, super against it I’ll tell you no.” He fanned out his hands in a nonchalant gesture. “Sounds fair?”

Keith gnawed on his lip and nodded. His thumb ran over his knuckles as he looked at the water instead of him, clasping his hands together to stop. His lips barely moved, the sound escaping in a breathy mumble as Keith stared daggers into the fire.

“…I’m not gonna lie, I have no idea what you just said.”

Keith groaned and covered his face with his hands, still resolutely not looking at Lance.

Feeling so incredibly amused at this apparent torture Lance bit his lip because laughing at Keith’s pain would be mean. Shuffling closer, he leaned into Keith’s personal space. Close enough that he could see the flush of his skin and the faint, faint, faint freckles he sometimes gets when out in the sun too long between his fingers.

Seeing how close Lance was Keith squeezed his eyes shut and dug the heels of his palm into his eyes. A heatedly whispered, ”fuck,” later and he bites out, “do you want to go on a date with me?”

Skkkkrrt. Wait. Rewind. “What?”

Keith instantly shot up, body turning, tense and jumpy. “Fuck, never mind.”

Before he could get too far Lance had a hand on his shoulder and the other grasping his sleeve. Somehow right next to him before he even realized that he moved.

“Wait. Yes— what— yes,” he stuttered out before his mouth could do any more harm.

He used his grip to gently turn Keith more towards him. He had his arms crossed in front of him, fingers gripping the fabric of the jacket, a scowl he hasn’t seen since their first year in place. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

His heart beat faster than when he faced down that Nemean lion. And somehow this was scarier than almost becoming cat food. Heat flared in his cheeks as he lowered his voice, cautious of the prying ears around the campfire. “I want to.”

Keith’s face softened, the scowl fading into a vulnerable look Lance had only seen a handful of times. He bit his lip and sat back down.

Lance sat next to him, not close enough to touch but enough for him to easily lean over and rest his hand between them. He didn’t want to push what already felt new and fragile. Baby steps. He was 96% sure that Keith would jump out of his skin and fall into the lake if he as much as puts his arm around him.

“Are you sure?” Keith blurted out, forcing Lance to drag his gaze from shark-toothed grins.

It’s almost as if he has Hermes’ flying shoes flying around in his stomach, kicking around and messing up the place. The idea of going out with Keith… that Keith wanting to go out with him… made him far too giddy for his own good.

“Absolutely. I told you I would say no if I didn’t right?” Lance bumped his shoulder against Keith’s. “You’re not calling me a liar are ya?”

Keith scoffed, leaning back on his hands, his fingers overlapping his. His fingers practically burned at the contact. “Never.” Those same fingers shifted and weaved between his, falling together like puzzle pieces. He smirked and looked over at him, hair parting so he could see his eyes. “I know you far too well for that.”

#vld #klance #PJO au #lance #keith #nadia #romelle #Swordplay and Strawberry Fields #lexwrites #whew boi it's been a hot second since i posted anything #hello

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softestkabru · 8 years ago

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please DO elaborate...... 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

From my tododeku hc post:

they’re soft and sweet in their first year, ridiculously hot and heavy in their second, and by third year, they are down right steady and known across UA as being “the strongest powercouple of the generation” (it is kind of embarrassing when people say that but they secretly love it)

Ok, so what I mean by all this is as follows:

First year: In my mind, they wouldn’t start actually dating till their first year is nearly over but ANYWAYS, when they do start dating, it’s really little things like ice cream dates after school. It’s hooking pinkys underneath the lunch table when they sit next to each other and blushing about it. It’s soft hand kisses when they part ways after school to walk home. It’s coming home with the dreamy-ist smiles on their faces. It’s the way todoroki blushes slightly and smiling softly when he talks to Momo about how his date with Deku was. It’s the way Deku’s face lights up when he talks about Todoroki to Iida and Uraraka. It’s holding hands when they think nobody can see. It’s when one catches the other staring at them from across the classroom and they both blush like crazy, Deku hiding his face in his hands. You know, pure and wholesome shit like that

Second year: At this point, they are way comfortable in their relationship and it’s less fluttery nerves and more hormone driven want. I’m basically working off the “horny high school boys” trope bc im so weak for that but you know how it goes. It just starts with them being more open about the fact that their dating and so they’re less nervous about PDA. They hold hands A LOT. They’ll hang off of each other (cue the “Todoroki holding deku by the hips” headcanon). One day in homeroom, they not-so-subtly end up sitting next to each other even though they know they have assigned seats. Aizawa comes in and looks over the class like he does and he doesn’t say anything but he’s rolling his eyes. So, as you can imagine, this all develops into them being way more touchy than last year. Everyone can tell. Deku brings Todoroki home to meet his mom and have dinner (Deku’s mom is thrilled her son is so happy but that’s all matters for a different post).

Their kisses evolve to the point where they’re getting at some deeper feeling than before and all they want to do is explore that feeling. Because it feels damn good. So before you know it, they’re stumbling into homeroom a few minutes late with ruffled hair and red faces bc yeah maybe they were making out behind a building and lost track of time, ok? They do stop being late for class but there’s rarely a moment after class that their hands aren’t all over each other.

There’s also the matter of the rival tension that’s inevitably between them. At first Deku is terrified that it’ll wreck their relationship but it sort of does the opposite... they figure out that it’s kind of a turn on.... Cue the sports festival and an avalanche of sexual tension. The entirety of both classes A and B end up having to oggle at it for the whole event because it’s very rare that they are put on the same teams. At nearly every break between events and such, Todoroki has Deku up against a wall kissing him crazy, the adrenaline of the games mixing with the hormonal haze that drives them together like magnets. He does have to let Deku be though as the one on one fights start because he knows how much Deku likes to take analysis notes. Without speculating on year 2 sports festival results, I think I’ll leave this here ^^

So, the year rolls on. There’s probably a class trip that’s at least semi-relaxing, maybe?? things get steamy ofc wtf else are class tips for.

Terushima and other classmates start prying with little shame, asking if they’ve done it yet, had sex. Deku is slightly scandalized. Todoroki just rolls his eyes. Neither of them say so, but yes they have done the deed but just once, at Todoroki’s house one weekend when no one was home. They were under the guise of a train/study weekend, which wasn’t a lie... they just happened to also have sex as well...

so yeah, you get the gist of 2nd year ;)

Third year: By now, most of UA knows they’re boyfriends. At the very least they know that if you get pitted against either one of them for whatever reason, You’re probably fucked and if you were to go against them as a pair, well, you’re really fucked. They’re dead serious about their hero careers. They’re also dead serious about each other. Freshman and their own classmates alike look up to them as #relationshipgoals

They are way less distracted by each other than the previous year, buckling down on studying and training and more studying. They’re still stupidly in love, obviously but it isn’t all shiny, new urges so it’s less “oh my god what is this feeling?? i want more of it right now” and more “God, I can’t wait till this training exercise is over so I can flirt with my boyfriend”

Oh also, they LIVE for bragging about each other, ok. Even to people they already know like, I can imagine Deku getting first place in the sports festival that year and Todoroki doesn’t shut up about it for weeks. Class A turns into that meme of “I love--” “Yes, we know, you love Deku. You are in love with Izuku Midoriya who won the third year Sports Festival competition. you love him, Deku, the next symbol of peace among humanity, we get it...” and it’s beautiful. Deku is the exact same way, btw. Basically I see them walking though halls, holding hands and standing tall and everyone’s heads turn to watch them as they go by :’)

This post is almost 1k words so if you read all of it, i love u. let me know what u think

#tododeku #bnha #mine #headcanons #Anonymous

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brokenhayatim · 5 years ago

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we might be dead tomorrow

[now playing the maze by manchester orchestra]

yesterday on a call, i had a moment of real possibility in having the decompression surgery. my neurologist last week said it was what she recommended and that chiari could be the cause of it all. so once i had it, they would most likely be gone, along with my headaches, then the meds i take would no longer be needed. it all hit me hard today and im feeling many emotions at this person who barely considered doing it for months. for god sake, i was in the hospital for it, a situation i never thought i would be in. (inshallah never again)

you know some part of me loves being told i have a high pain tolerance, a big part of me loves being poked with needles (!!) and loves looking at my mri’s. oh story time, the day my neurologist said something was different, aka wrong, i smiled in the chair and asked if i could look at it and went “ah cool!.” she gave me the wildest look but described all the brain anatomy stuffs to me. I told my therapist of this moment and he went “.oh...you were happy?” [types some notes on his computer] and i realized, normal people don’t do that and i probably said that badly with no shame. i wasn’t particular happy, but i was nowhere near sad or scared, i was excited. i think my dissociation makes me almost see everything as not mine. those aren’t my scans so i can be exhilarated and so curious about everything. or it could be that pain just isn’t something i worry or care for anymore. months later, i laughed bc something else being wrong with me, it’s almost fate. sometimes i wish i was terrified, but i didn’t care for it. i already had bad headaches, so what?

over these last few months though. it’s like i’ve made room in my home for it, i’ve become familiar with it, not so much comfortable, but so familiar that it doesn’t matter in the big picture. a secret: sometimes i feel really impressed and good when i tell of my imbalance issues, (vertigo), numbness in my limbs, the tinnitus and the nausea. sometimes..i wish i had more. i feel proud of myself when people have headaches, like i know the worst of that pain, and i’ve been through it. i don’t know if it’s because i want to be validated in having it or if it’s just how i am like that. i wish i could tell my sisters and everyone a whole list of symptoms, but all of them seem so useless and mediocre. i sometimes want that attention from just collapsing; but ironically, i hate being bothered and cared for with it. i found meaning in it all, i found a whole part of me within it all. i had headaches for 6 years before i, simply, told my general physician, and since then it’s been 5 (way too long of) mri’s and an EEG (that was certainly a moment). i wished, back then, i had seizures too. we called one of my pain symptoms “brain shocks” for years with that creative name and made it into this freeze “game”, and i just mentioned that two years ago in a visit. half of my identity is just on having headaches, of being in pain around people. and i’m stupidly fucking (sorry last day of ramadan) scared of losing that. i’ve taken more medications pills than i can count, and i know their purpose pridefully well. i’ve given advice based on that pain, i’ve helped someone with that pain. i’ll never be ready to lose that. i think of it and i imagine myself more empty. full of nothing.

the reason i’m writing this though wasn’t all that. i woke up and just felt this aching shame and sobbed, still am i can barely see, in my bed (so much snot). i’m so scared, more than anyone can possibly try to understand, of it all being gone. of never having to take a pill for this anymore (i still have dat mental illness so not those), or of never needing the knowledge of different types and locations of headaches. i’ve began to feel prideful in having a neurological condition. it makes me something, i have something i can tell. this is the thought that started the spiral. i feel something with this pain. what will happen when i can’t feel this anymore? what will i turn to next? what does the loss feel like? (is that corny or shallow bc it sounds so??) my therapist asked me ‘why i didn’t want to rid it?’ and i was like ‘i genuinely don’t know’ to which he replied ‘i think you do’ and i was all sIR i legit don’t know pls tell me. i made up this random guess and stuttered through it, it felt out of body almost, leaving my lips. what if getting rid of this physical pain forces me to submerge myself in my emotional pain and deal with that? i feel like i have none pls..me?? i’m chill sans the moments like this. (he also says my tether to pain is like penance, some kind of self punishment i feel i deserve..so lettuce chill bro). but the physical pain of headaches, the imbalance, the dizziness, even the numbness in my legs, i always feel something. it’s something i can remember in my head then move past. and when i remember it later, it’s intoxicatingly satisfying and i want it to happen again. i wish i collapsed or had to crawl to my room more often. i like..want to boast about it?? i remember that moment vividly being a ‘this is it’ one too. i was home alone crawling to my room bc my legs gave out and i needed my meds for my pounding headache, and i genuinely thought i was gonna die there on the floor. that moment of me hating and scared of it though is so fleeting, only lasting the day probs. and a part of me will always hate it. that’s normal. but that’s not strong enough to overcome me. it’s bittersweet.

“it’s not the same, but it’s similar to people losing their limbs, or injured so badly they’re forced to give up their career, or an addict quitting using drugs.” sure, but you can notice, you can see all that. this is all in my head. unless you see my mri’s you would never even guess. it was why i wished my diagnosis was something with seizures, at least that’s something noticeably neurological that i can recognize myself. (am i a bad person? baby no doubt.) my old roommate once said she didn’t even know i had headaches often because i never complained or mentioned it. i would just go to the pantry and take my pill as you would with a cookie. and i’ll never be any other way, and i never was. i grew up closing the bathroom door when i threw up, washing my face after crying and walking back in the kitchen to my mom. i grew up missing moments of laughter and joy with my sisters to just lay in a dark room in pain, being checked on at the some time in the night. even to this day, i will sit in lectures when my head is pounding and i know i’ll throw up soon. anyways, my three sisters were talking about one of the other’s qualities and how amazed they are bc ‘they would never’. one of them had actually gone to class, and i softly mentioned how i am like that too, i think i’ve missed three classes in my four years (minus calc bc the class was more confusing than teaching myself). i said i’ve sat through night classes with headaches and with no meds for three hours and they were like mmm. i almost felt jealous that she always spoke of her small and big achievements, and i speak of none. no one even knew my major till this year. why, allah, why am like this? what made me too reserved and careless of myself? my education is the only thing that makes me feel worthy in the eyes of others...so mine, and i never even share it. it’s that, perfect on paper, that’s how i want to be. (because i know i’ll never be otherwise) i get up in a week of seclusion & sobbing and head off to class, sometimes i cry in class (iconic moments truly, your glasses hide wonders). last year i was sitting in this three hour class with excruciating (and i don’t use that lightly) pain in my head to the point where i had to cradle it with my hands and nearly bang it against the table from thrashing, i was in the middle of the room so i did a 10/10 job at playing it off. i never went to the bathroom or even home early...because i had another class after..which it persisted in. i had never felt that before in my entire life. another day, i silently cried like you wouldn’t believe in the bathroom stall (after uncharacteristically leaving the room) then wiped my tears, fixed my makeup and went right back into class. anyways does that even matter? am i even strong? i want to be so badly. for real this time, not this image. and i’m not. i’m barely enough as it is.

odd tangent: i don’t care enough or at all about the people i should and i lie to make em feel good and feel better. i know people that love me would still, with this loss of pain, but i doubt myself, and i underestimate them yeah. i say 'them’ like i care what half the people in my life think or care about, it’s just noor and rose. i love rose but i don’t bring these things up, i don’t normally update and i don’t think i’ve ever opened up about my trauma enough for it to mean more than anything superficial. we have this beautiful relationship, yet i don’t find purpose in telling her if need not be, maybe one day. it’s different with noor. i babble all the damn time about everything and feel myself have no filter with these things. i mean, i mention noor to rose too, as if she’s a mutual friend. i care for them both. i love them both in different ways, both ways that are rare for me. rose wasn’t the first person i’ve met or cared about, but she was the first person i remember loving the way i do. i wish i could describe how i feel for noor simply, but i can’t. there was a long-while where she was more important to me than my family, even my sisters (i know, i was like uhmmm). i’ve written something, poem or prose, of almost everyone that was close to me aka 4 peeps (let’s not get wild here). and yet, i’ve written nothing of noor. i’ve written for her yes, but not of her. i tried and it’s arguably the hardest thing to do and i’m quite adequate at writing, if i do say so myself. i tried once in 2017, i stared at the screen for so long just backspacing bc nothing made sense. she’s my emotional support high school sweetheart that renders me powerless with my own words. (does that help?)

back to our scheduled program: physical pain. it’s been maybe 10 years now that i’ve made a home for it. sometimes the lights go out when it gets bad, and sometimes i decorate with flowers when it excites me and brings something new. the house is probably the ugliest thing you’ve even had to lay your eyes upon, but it’s the best i got and it’s mine to come home to. i wouldn’t give her up without a fight. and i think that’s what my mind has been doing for so many months. trying to save my home, trying to keep every symptom of pain that i have. one day i’ll have to move out or i just die in here. both are changes i just can’t seem to make. i feel like i’m running out of time to sell it and move out, to do something and get rid of the pain. and, i feel like i’m making a mistake choosing to die in here, ignoring it and having it stay or get worse. if it gets worse, i’ll need help and the day i stop feeling like a burden to people, especially my family, let me know would ya. i don’t even often know how to ask for help if i wanted it - and then there’s being cared for that’s a nope to me. i can handle every moment of my pain from all my symptoms and condition, and yet i’m the weakest person in so much. i’m not a person that fears much, most times i find it impractical honestly. i reminded myself of that on my bedroom floor last year in february, during a moment of weakness. (also yes i use a lot of home analogies in writing ok) note: i’ve been mulling through this surgery decision for maybe a year on end now.

do i wish i was scared and worried to feel an ounce of normalcy? of course. but i’m not, i wasn’t even relieved with the diagnosis that day, went out and got pizza broo. even when i thought i was going insane. because what does it matter if it doesn’t change the pain? it’s kind of strange, but when i think of all this physical pain ( is it mental too idk??), i hear this voice in my head that smoothly and confidently says “gimme all you got.” i daydream of how much more i can take, what different things my brain and body can devise before i crack. and, obviously this voice personified does this...with finger guns.

#what's good in the hood #eid mubarak to me!#asiya's thoughts

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tomaytow · 3 years ago

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yes we’re so starved. we need to feed each other the goods as possible. . . . .... also i’m so sorry for this late response HAHAH, damn flight took a toll on me and yes, you’re right. how can you not think of venti 24/7 when he’s always running on our minds. (does he even get tired istg)

well i’m glad that you’re smiling the entire time!!!! it’s so nice that my rivals scenario made you happy because it made me happy too. again, rivals to lovers supreme!!! aaaa!!! also can i just mention how it made me giggle like a little bitch with this line: it’s literally so frustrating to even have him NEAR YOU ??? it’s gotten that bad and his stupid smile would just grow bigger on his stupidly cute face bc it still feels like he’s looking down on you and maybe. maybe. THIS IS SO FUNNY BECAUSE YOU KNOW READER IS ALREADY STRUGGLING WITH THEIR FEELINGS HELP MEEEE (reader: damn that smirk. i wanna punch him on the lips.

reader: with my lips.)

oh gods. who can make the other more flustered competition will be such a mess, i’m telling you. no one can ever win this because both are too EMBARRASSED TO SAY ANYMORE WORDS. also i bet that there will be mixed signals, and a lot of overthinking. loooots of overthinking.

IN ALL HONESTY, I SALUTE LUNA’S CHARACTERIZATION OF VENTI. it just feels so right and because of her, i can finally envision a romantic venti. her venti is so on point that i will give her all the kudos in the world. the maid listener, by the way, made me explode a lot (figuratively and literally) i swear to god. it made me FEEL SHIVERS. like literal shivers like holy shit i remember how i always cupped my mouth in embarrassment??? in shock???? because what the fuck venti how can you make me FEEL all these things the power u hold, the power lunasmr venti holds-

the teasing venti in the hot springs: “i’m distracting you?” yeah. i think i d-worded.

no no i’m the worst. any mention of venti then my interest is piqued. my irls and internet friends know HOW much i am in love with him they always call me if there’s anything venti akdjhhjsa

ALSO YOU’RE SO RIGHT. i thought we would ever get a singing venti in the game but i was disappointed that there was none. LIKE COME ONNN, YUN JIN SANG IN ONE OF THOSE AMAZING CUTSCENES, WHY HASN’T VENTI SANG ANYTHING??

maybe it’s because it’s too divine for our ears that’s why mhy doesn’t want to..... also his chinese VA.she’s amazing, i’ve listened to her songs!!! it was so beautiful. <3

envision: venti calling us “my warrior,” as he strokes our hair while we lay on his lap...

YOU’RE SO SMART!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HIS HAIR AND HIS MARKS GLOWING UNDERWATER SO HE CAN SEE THROUGH THE DARKNESS THAT’S GORGEOUS. ETHEREAL. AAAAAAAAAA. PERFECT he’s so pretty aaa.a.a..s.s.dd.d i want him so badly

the way he moves underwater can make anyone in love like wow why is he so flexible, smooth, and g r a c e f u l

thanks for this recommendation of the mermaid venti asmr!!! i’ll listen to it if i have the time!!

a lovesick venti is what i want to see in my life. i want you to see my vision again: imagine if windblume just kisses venti so passionately his foot literally pops like those girls in romance movies pfffft-

also consider: a dazed venti who always sighs lovingly as he admires his windblume from afar, muttering, “they’re so dreamy...”3

wedding in a forest and the decorations are so beautiful. only good and close friends or relatives are invited. there are so many flowers and animals. everyone looks beautiful. i can just picture it kahdghsjj

everyone’s fond of venti already, so when he makes his romantic vows, he won’t waste his opportunity in embarrassing his soon-to-be-spouse. “now i’ll forever hear your snores.” “HEY! at least i’m not the little spoon, venti.” “hush!!! it feels nice to be the little spoon!!! and i like it when your arms are wrapped around me...”

also welcome aboard to the flustered venti agenda. MY IDEA IS THAT VENTI CAN GET FLUSTERED WITH PHYSICAL TOUCH. I ALWAYS LIKED THAT. like come on he would definitely melt if windblume just... embraced him so affectionately, so tenderly, and so gently.. . . . ... he would be soo comfortable and so warm he wouldn’t want to separate from us. he would get all whiny and pouty if we ever pull away. tho i also like the concept of (oh no here we go again, another au) where reader is like, a stoic, apathetic person and seems to be not OPEN with their feelings at all until they just declare their love for venti, and venti, who’s not used to this at all, just bursts into a beautiful shade of scarlet.

“and what makes him flustered when people tease him over how down horrendous he is over you is bc he keeps remembering the things you do and it makes him so 💕💞💖💗♥️💘💓 because he just loves you so much and awh now look he’s all red! and now all of his drinking buddies are laughing at him again that night and honestly? he wouldn’t have it any other way. they can laugh all they want but that’s only because they don’t understand love the way he does whenever he looks at you.”

venti lunasmr voice: only you can make me feel like this.”

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH TOO. but we need angst. we need the venti angst amigo we need some of it, it’s not all happy, right??? we need the crumbs... the angst crumbs.... or maybe is it just me HAHAH i like pain

i was so excited with luna’s venti angst audio ldjkfjdkd

mAYBE IT’S BECAUSE AFTER THE ANGST THERE’S HURT/COMFORT???? hhh i love that sm ok i will be goo

yes it is noted that we will rely on each other it’s already happening i’m glad that we formed a pact over this let us feed our starving souls once again

all the req ideas on luna's livestream is driving me insane

#tomatothings #tomatoblog #venti i have feelings for you #opening tumblr to see ops reply is serotonin!!#i love interacting with cool venti stans #this reminds me i need to play genshin again #but i need to take a break #thank u i had a safe flight im back home uwu #mORE VENTI SIMPING WOOHOOO #also i forgot to say #nice pfp

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sapphicluxanna · 6 years ago

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1-100 pls 🌹💕

BABE. oh my god. okay here we go, it’s gonna be long!!

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? more cereal than milk I think?

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? I love winter and everything about it, I’d rather be cold than hot

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? post it notes, receipts, I’ve used flowers a few times, really anything that’s in reach

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? tea with a little bit of milk and honey, coffee depends on the day? typically with a lil bit of vanilla creamer. when I make my ‘fancy’ coffee at home with frothy milk on top I always top them off with a dusting of cinnamon

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? always

6: do you keep plants? ye! I have a succulent/cacti terrarium, some sunflowers, jasmine, african violets, tomato plants, hanging planters, and a few more I forget the names of!

7: do you name your plants? not the ones I have currently

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? I love ink. I haven't been able to paint with ink in a while, but the movement of that and watercolor are just.. freeing? I dunno how to explain it. that and drawing using ink, every mark you make is permanent and I just kinda zone out when doing it

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? aight listen. my future s/o is gonna have to deal with this a lot. shower? singing. car ride? singing. cooking? singing. y'all aint getting a break even if I sound like a dying cat

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? primarily side and stomach!

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? I cant think of many at the moment but uhhhh. hmm. a few guys and I play a game together and I run the group (in rdr2), and we don't let people join it if their horse’s tail isn't braided so we’ll hunt them down and kill them instead

12: what’s your favorite planet? neptune looks beautiful

13: what’s something that made you smile today? the fact that you wanted to know more about me

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? lots and lots of plants, kinda modern, a few fish tanks, smells like lavender and coffee

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! mars has the biggest known volcano!

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? stupidly basic, but chicken parmesan

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? I’ve always wanted to impulsively dye it some shade of blue just for a few weeks

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. I got ridiculously drunk off tequila at a house party and was given my first mojito, thought he picked leaves off the tree out back and threw them in so I dug them out and threw them around the yard in disgust. I have a very vague memory of this but they always give me crap for it

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? I have a couple! one is my bujo where I keep lists of things like self care ideas, favorite movies and books, quotes, friend stuff, etc. another I use to draw in and like to recreate van gogh sketches, others are private

20: what’s your favorite eye color? y'all ever really see brown eyes? oof

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. I don't have this?

22: are you a morning person? I could be if I woke up next to the right person

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? netflix binging, reading, aquarium shopping, walks with my dog in the woods, making stupid pancakes, and league with a babe

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? it takes time for me to trust people, so probably all my life at some point with a girl. as for family? no

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? I’ve locked myself outta my place a few times and had to go through the window

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? several pairs of sandals and slides!

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? just regular mint?

28: sunrise or sunset? watching the sunset on a blanket in the grass with a girl I care about

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? her voice gets a lil louder and she talks fast when she's excited about something and its flipping adorable

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. I love fluffy socks and patterned socks and ones with dinosaurs and stuff and I love socks so much, don't sleep in them though

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. we played a drinking game based off how we did in a split screen game, one drink for every kill, got v drunk that night

33: what’s your fave pastry? I love baclava but I’m horribly allergic to walnuts

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? I still have it! my dad went down to south carolina a lot and I was, and still am, very much in love with alligators. I think I was six or something but he came home with this giant garbage bag and was moving it like there was an animal inside and when I opened it, it was a giant stuffed alligator. he's currently sitting on my bed, but seems a lot smaller now

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? I really wanna get into using thicker paper for letters with pressed wax seals and pressed flowers

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? I don’t really focus on individual bands too much tbh, I bounce around a lot within genres. anything happy and country atm

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? I’m tryna keep it cleaner, better habit to make myself get into

38: tell us about your pet peeves! people smoking around me (I don't care that you smoke whatever, I just ask you don't do it around me bc it makes me feel sick), a group of people that takes up the whole sidewalk going incredibly slow, people that cut me off in traffic without turn signals, people who f around in the tsa line and don't get ready then stand there for ten minutes taking everything off for the scanner and hold us up, “there” and “their” and “they’re” misuses, etc. jeez, didn't realize I had so many and that's not even all of them

39: what color do you wear the most? blue?

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I love my claddagh ring, my mom and sister both have the same one and we all match. currently not wearing it bc it was like 100 degrees F then other day and it burned my finger?????

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? asoiaf!!!!

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! I like this lil coffee shop about half an hour away, every drink has an individual and funny name and the workers are nice

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? I honestly can’t remember, but I could really go for this right now

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? uhhhh it’s been a bit? lotta stressors recently

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? I try to, should've listened to them regarding some stuff and I didn’t

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. what do you call a blind dinosaur? a do-you-think-he-saurus.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? broccoli

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? santa and the dark, no on both accounts now

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? no, I just use apple music

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? I dunno about odd, but I keep seashells and shark teeth I find on beaches

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? somebody to love

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? uhhhh I’m bad at keeping up with when these come out but probably the “wait was anyone going to tell me ___ or was I supposed to find out in this ___”

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? I haven't seen these sorry!

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? my dad

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? I honestly cannot think of this right now

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? when they get excited about something, when their eyes sparkle a bit in sunlight, when they’re touchy (only certain ones), compassion, weird hobbies and interests, etc

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? it’s an experience. listen with headphones on high or don't listen to it at all

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? I guess I’d be the wine mom bc I don't drink heavily too often with my friends cause I’m usually the dd, vodka aunt would go to my friend S cause hell she puts that shit away fast

59: what’s your favorite myth? I love greek mythology

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? sappho

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? a lil cat bank that grabs a coin with its paw and drags it into the box and a potato, respectively

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? not usually

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? I kept all of my books on a shelf before the move but idk what imma do with them now bc I have no room for a bookcase so they're kinda messy rn

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? pale blue and cloudy

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? a friend who moved away a few years ago, I miss her

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? oooooh. hmm. lots of blues and pinks and purples with lil twisty brown vines?

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? I love them, 10/10, perfect.

68: what’s winter like where you live? we either get 3 feet of snow overnight or a dusting, there’s no in between

69: what are your favorite board games? I cant remember the last time I played a board game??? I liked the game of life and monopoly when I was a kid

70: have you ever used a ouija board? nope

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? whatever happens to be in the cabinet!

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? I have the memory of a goldfish

73: what are some of your worst habits? letting people get away with things they've done to me, being too lenient with people that make me uncomfortable, etc

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. they’re such a good friend and we have enough years built into our friendship that we can go a few weeks without talking and be right where we left off. they’re kind and caring and ready to help people when they need it

75: tell us about your pets! my cat is an 8 year old lil grump, but he gets so freaking affectionate and lovey too. he knows when I’m anxious and will come up and sit on my chest and purr. my dog’s a ball of jumping energy, she's always excited and happy, she’s only 2 so hopefully she’ll mellow out. then my clownfish are flipping adorable even though they try to bite my fingers when I’m working on the aquarium

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? unpacking and socializing with family

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink lemonade

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? I don't care about them really, but the facebook minion memes passed around by moms gotta stop

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? one of my exes surprise got me flowers sometimes, while the relationship just didn't work that was a cute action

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? they’re kinda beige-ish? I just moved here and I don’t wanna repaint them

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. hmm. one of my friends’ eyes are like the leaves on the forest floor, an assortment of greens and browns blended together with the occasional fleck of gold when light filters through the trees

82: are/were you good in school? I’m okay? In high school I was in honor classes and stuff and I've made the deans list a few times in college so far, but honestly I think I’m just average. I have a lot of issues with math and it’s why I couldn't go into one of the fields I was considering. I get overwhelmed quickly

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? tbh I don't look at this kinda stuff but I know kesha’s rainbow was good?

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? ye! I want a small humpback whale on my left inner wrist, they mean a lot to me and I finally got to see one in person just last year. then I have some scars on my thigh I’ve been tossing around the idea of getting a tattoo to cover up, but idk if I would or what I would get

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? no sorry! I always wanted to when I was younger but I got psyched out by guys who would say they're not for girls who I never took advantage of the comic shop a family friend owns

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? I dunno what this is and I’m too tired to google it but imma guess its about music? to which I say I’m v bad at keeping up with everyones stuff

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? the princess bride, star wars, lord of the rings, the sound of music, indiana jones (NOT crystal skull, it sucked), jurassic park, and a lottttt more.

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? impressionism, post impressionism, and expressionism

89: are you close to your parents? ish.

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. I absolutely loved st. malo in france. I need to go back. it’s a giant walled city on the water and it’s just beautiful. I sat and watched an artist on the street for a while and bought two of his paintings afterward, gotta figure out where to hang them in my new bedroom. the air smelled amazing, it rained a lot when I was there but I still loved it and I wish I’d had more time to really explore than I did

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? I wanted to go to sri lanka to see my family but I don’t think it’s gonna happen, but I’ve got my fingers crossed for pennsylvania cause reasons

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? cheese is life

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? I braid it overnight and wear it down during the day!

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday? my dad a few days ago

95: what are your plans for this weekend? I think I’ve got another family party to go to? feel kinda done with my fam rn though

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? I literally just installed 2 years worth of updates this morning, so yeah, I procrastinate updates quite a bit

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? idk what the first thing is but the others are scorpio and slytherin!

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? oh wow I can’t remember, but imma say yes? I wanna hike with my dog at some point

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. somebody to love, la mer, and some others

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the future. I hope that future me is happy and comfy with someone she loves surrounded by their plants, aquariums, pets, and love.

#this was #so long #youre adorable ily #lack of emojis due to typing on my computer #oof #answered

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