#barbatos going “so we meet again” 5 nights in a row

[zephyrchama]

Consider: Barbatos opening portals to MC’s room in his sleep.

He can try and conceal his feelings all he wants during the daytime. Even the strongest demons can’t lie to themselves for long.

It began as quite the embarrassing predicament. You’d never seen Barbatos so flushed. You both exchanged puzzled expressions from opposite sides of a portal in the dead of night, dressed in sleepwear, too astonished for words. As suddenly as it appeared, the portal closed, leaving you to wonder if it was a dream.

Barbatos’ profuse apologies the next day proved that it wasn’t. You insisted it was okay, accidents happen, and begged him not to prostrate himself on the ground in front of you when he started to kneel. He vowed to make it up to you in some way. Any way within his power.

The second time it happened, he was angry. The two of you were startled awake at roughly the same time and the butler had to suppress a groan.

“It is most unbecoming of me to repeatedly invade your privacy in this way.” His eyes were narrowed with fury. He spoke through clenched teeth. These lapses in control really took a mental toll. “Disgraceful, even. Please excuse me.”

You wondered if this happened more than twice and Barbatos just covered it up. At times, he acted more protective of your dignity than anyone else.

“Glad to see you taking a break for once,” you joked, but the portal had already closed again. You stared at the space it once occupied until you fell back asleep.

The occurrences began ramping up. From once per month, to once per week, to every couple of days. As time passed, Barbatos’ disgruntled annoyance at himself turned into resigned acceptance. “I never took myself to be this kind of man,” he shamefully confided to you one day. “As you know, my restraint is typically excellent.” 

You peered at him over the pillows. It looked as though the two of you were laying next to each other despite being in different buildings. “Maybe you’re stressed? Have you been working too much?”

“I doubt that’s the case. I would gladly do more if it benefited the Young Master. But, ah... I’ve kept you up for too long, haven’t I?” Barbatos smiled your way. “Sweet dreams.”

With your nightly meetings becoming an almost everyday occurrence, there would be rare times Barbatos didn’t immediately wake up. In sleep, his magic was as strong as ever, if a smidge less coordinated. The portal frame would wobble or randomly change size. Sometimes it appeared above your pillow. Sometimes you wondered if it was stable enough to move through, to reach an arm over and pat Barbatos on the head. Though, in the end you always figured it was best to let sleeping demons lay.

Even if he does it to you when you’re asleep.

[dirtycccat]

the demon bros+ undateables showing their love

thought about this for 5 min then had to write it out so enjoy

lucifer

first off you notice he treats you differently

and by differently i mean like you’re his favorite child  sibling

you get away with anything??? and he’s softer with you than with the others (which is canon)

then you see that?? he keeps buying you stuff you said you wanted when he was present

and you’re ofc impressed

but you’re more impressed by how open he’s around you

he’ll leave most of his walls down around  you

which means you’ll get to experience unfiltered lucifer

he’ll laugh around you more, make dumb dad jokes, nap with his head in your lap, complain drunkenly about his work and bros, give you sloppy cheeks and forehead kisses

you find it rly cute though

if you’re in the human world he’ll 100% take this chance to send you beautifully written letters asking you how you are and leaving some verses that reminded him of you on the back like a 19th century vampire

“dear mc, how is your life? mine is filled with woe and unease since i do not  have the light of my life around anymore...anyway here’s a poem about being horny and alone by a 18th century romantic author hope to see you soon, xoxo lucifer”

you try to respond in the same way and send him memes on the back instead of  poetry (or real poetry depends on your mood)

mammon

protective of you 100% will throw hands with anyone that even glances weirdly your way

but also wants to show you off? like look at this human!!! this is MY human!!!

gives you random thoughtful gifts that reminded him of you

wants to be around you 24/7 so he invites you to all the events that he thinks you’ll like

you wanna party? perfect. you wanna go on a weird ghost stories tour around the city? cool. you wanna waltz in one of those old people parties? he’s already reserved two tickets. you just wanna lay around and nap? he’s already on your lap.

it doesn’t matter if you’re in a romantic relationship or not this man WILL serenade you outside your window

rapunzel style with an acoustic guitar or with a boombox like a rebel 80s kid

anyway here’s toxic by britney spears babe this is for YOU

levi

considers you his bff ofc

but also at first he’s still really awkward around you and doesn’t really know what to do for you and feels bad thinking only you do things for him

until you reassure him you enjoy just being around him so it’s fine

he blushes and starts inviting you more to his room to game/ watch stuff

at some point he starts buying two tickets to all concerts he goes to and invites you along

but also? he asks you what you’re into and starts marathoning your favorite animes/ movies/ series so he can talk with you abt them

you feel really moved that he’d do that for you???  like??? bruh...

your relationship is basically friends respecting each other and wanting to know each other the best through their passions even if it means getting into some weird shit

it’s rly wholesome tho

if you’re romantically involved he’ll totally do roleplay as your favourite character and you do the same for him and it’s really cute

also imagine: artistic collabs. you make fanart together??? you can program games together???? you do cosplay together??? the possibilities...

satan

he’ll hate to be compared to his dad brother but he does show how much he trusts you by showing his unguarded side too

when he first talked about lucifer without the filter of his nice guy persona you were pretty shocked

like he was really going at it

but then you realize? he’s just like that when he’s comfortable

and it’s not all mean spirited, he just has,,, a strong personality and a lot of opinions about stuff (which you sometimes share with him)

but you also found out it’s really fun to gossip with satan

since he knows all the juicy gossip from his multitude of ties (he’s sharing the title of gossip queen with asmo that’s why they get along so well tbh)

also if you even find a teacher you hate he’ll tell you all their embarrassing moments to make you feel better

he also recommends you books and poems and sends you quotes that made him think about you

so you sure as heck don’t need to buy books while you’re in the devildom bc he’ll buy you an entire library 

asmo

compliments you without comparing you to himself which is the highest compliment he can give

like mammon he’s more into the showing everyone his favorite human around while also protecting them

he’ll take you to his parties and gatherings as a guest of honor, he’ll make you meet all kinds of people and open up opportunities for you

he’ll be the one that pampers you

you’d think lucifer is the sugar daddy of the family but nope it’s asmo

he’ll buy you cute clothes, shoes, beauty products everything that he saw and imagined would look bomb on you

if you’re not into clothes he’ll buy you art supplies, books, anything you want but he’ll still probably  buy you at least some clothes he thinks are cute

if you’re romantically involved,,,, he’ll buy other toys for you as well which you can try together wink wink

beel

cooks for you

no questions asked when it’s his turn to cook he’ll think about what YOU would like to eat first before making something

which is??? really touching coming from beel

and also means sometimes he’ll make the same dish three weeks in a row and annoy the others while you just get excited bc ??? you get to eat your favourite dish??? again and again???? 

thank you beel you truly know how to touch someone’s insides

also opens up to you and talks to you about his fears and thoughts

expect to get 4 am msgs from beel if he had a nightmare

which would end up in you coming to cuddle him (and belphie also joins sometimes)

which tbh is that even a thing you can complain about?

belphie

is more baby less murder when you’re around

naps on your lap, naps on your shoulder, naps with you anywhere

but also let’s you nap on HIM

besides being soft around you he actually opens up to you too

and talks to you about his traumas and issues

which he has in common with his twin what can you do

so you have weekly cuddle parties with him and beel where you talk about shit and actually make them resolve their issues instead of just,,, ignoring them

also if you’re into each other you probably tease each other and flirt really shamelessly in public while the others cringe and or blush at your language

are you a cowboy? because i want you to ride me all night 

simeon

writes you fancy letters with poetry like lucifer, but his ink is scented and  his envelopes contain pressed flowers more often than not

if you’re together you even do letter sexting if you’re into it

creates characters based on you in his stories (which you don’t believe even if levi points out you that the two of you are kinda similar)

asks you to spend more and more time with him and luke

invites you to picnics, reads to you while your head is in his lap, cooks you snacks

if you’re a theatre kid too,,, you do musical love confessions too,,, sometimes by just reciting the lyrics of really popular musical theatre songs in a death panned voice

cough a heart full of love from les mis but read like poetry through the fence of the house of lamentation cough

asks you cryptic shit hannibal style like “tell me mc what does it mean to want to be consumed whole by another? is it a desire to become something bigger than yourself or is it related to our need to become one with our loved one like some cultures pointed out before?”

you’re either really into his cryptid talk or just roll your eyes and smooch him

diavolo

invites you around to his castle all the time

sometimes he even pulls some weird shenanigans just to make you spend more time with him

expect tea parties with him luci and barbatos in no particular combination

gives you compliments 24/7  even in public

remember how he treats lucifer? he’s that for you too but he’s learned from the lucifer experience to focus on complimenting you as a person more than how you look

if you’re into pda he’ll touch you all the time

if you ever wanted a gomez - morticia romance, here’s your goth big titty himbo that’s way too full of love

if you’re lovers expect to be pampered, i feel like? he doesn’t buy a lot of gifts and such because he’s probably tired of material things but he will make time in his busy schedule for you and spend a lot of time with you

which means more to him than gifts

(we will buy you anything you ask though)

barbatos

actually talks with you about stuff outside rad, the demon bros and diavolo

also invites you to alone time tea or wine time

where you drink and gossip

if satan and asmo are the crowned queens of gossip barbatos is the king of gossip but he doesn’t share his knowledge to most people so nobody knows what he knows

but he knows,,,, a lot

and not only that he knows a lot about people nowadays,,, but imagine the things he knows about like historical figures and such,,, 

so prepare for story time with barbatos where he  talks about how oscar wilde was almost summoned by drunk inccubi during a party once, or how  diavolo cried when he was a kid because he sent a letter to caravaggio asking him to paint his portrait and he said no

also if you get drunk together expect really energetic talkative barbatos destroying DESTROYING everyone (except diavolo ofc)

“lucifer please i once saw you crying because you thought diavolo was ignoring you when you actually forgot to press the send button to your messages ”

if you’re romantically involved diavolo will always be first in his hear but that just means you’ll have to invite diavolo along on your dates which  just means you’ve got a new lover and a new bff

solomon 

he invites you on all kinds of wacky adventures

you  visit witches, go to weird magical forest parties or orgies if you want, you go travelling the mountains for rare herbs

it’s like you’re faust and he’s mephisto  haha the irony and he’s showing you another side of the world you never knew 

ofc the others know about all this but??? they thought it’s normal and didn’t even consider you know nothing about it

but solomon knows what it was like to be just a human

and since he likes you he empathizes with your situation

he also make you meet all kinds of people

since he has 72 contracts and hundreds of years of doing wack stuff he must know some interesting people

and now his friends are your friends 

i feel like romantic solomon would be just him?? but less shady with you especially since now you understand him better 

but also he’ll probably bring you weird shit from his alone expeditions

did you ever want the tears of a mermaid? a carnivorous plant that feeds on emotions? a crying portrait? no? well too bad because now you have a room full of weird items

...that you love and treasure thank you very much

[indiavolowetrust]

Carajillo II

SUMMARY: The sequel to Carajillo, which you can read here. A coup d'etat has been staged in the Celestial Realm. The human proposes a plan to halt the impending war.

Part One: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

Part Two: Coming Soon!

Part Three: Coming Soon!

TW: Blood, Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, Mention of Rape

PART ONE: CHAPTER FOUR

The sound of my footsteps resonates throughout the expanse of the corridor. Given the lateness of the hour -- Lord Diavolo had called upon me at a quarter and thirty-six seconds to eight p.m. -- the hall is illuminated only by the light of the false moon, its hue lending a rather silver quality to the space before me. Aside from the live-in servants, night guards, and guests, this division of the castle is empty. Nearly silent in the absence of movement. And so I walk with deliberate steps in the direction of Maria’s quarters, a bottle hidden within the confines of my waistcoat. Waiting for the demon at the end of the hall to speak.

It is only a moment before I pass him by, his form only slightly obscured in the shadow. I do not address him first.

“You were there, weren’t ya?” he says, not bothering to step away from the wall. His body is propped up in a casual manner, his arms folded across his chest. “When she died.”

“Yes.”

Mammon glares at me over the thick frames of his spectacles, his ill-tempered nature apparent in his gaze. Characteristics of a brash, arrogant creature. “Then why didn’t ya do anything?” he demands. “We got the news the morning after it happened, ya know. The way she kicked the bucket. How could ya just stand there and watch her die? Why didn’t --”

“I’m not a god,” I answer, cutting him off. “It is impossible to change a predestined course of events.”

“Whaddya mean? That’s your whole thing!” He clenches his fists, the volume of his voice rising with each word. “She -- she died because none of you tried to help her! If you couldn’t protect her then, what makes you think you can protect her now? I can’t lose her again.”

I regard him dispassionately. “Your pact with her was severed upon death. She does not belong to you.”

He winces at that, as if my very words had burned him. It seems I have struck a nerve.

“That -- that doesn’t matter!” He finally pushes himself off the wall. I can discern his true form beginning to materialize, the shadows behind him revealing the curved horns and bat-like wings. “If she didn’t come to that stupid summit, she’d still be here! What would ya even know about her, anyway? How could ya even understand how she suffered? You’re nothin’ more than Diavolo’s dog!”

“You are nothing more than a disgraced angel.”

“Yeah, but at least I would’ve protected her!” he snarls. “Unlike you, I would have done everythin’ I could to save her. If I were there, she wouldn’t have --”

“And where were you, then?”

I sense the movement before my eyes perceive it. The unfurling of wings, the crack of his horns as they rupture through his skull, the shift in the air as he lunges at me. It would take three seconds and forty-two milliseconds to shift into my true form, one second and ten milliseconds to completely dodge the blow, and five seconds and twenty-seven milliseconds to prepare a full counterattack.

Given that the demon before me is only the second strongest brother, I have little need to do so.

He lets out a groan of pain as his skull bounces off the brocade, the force leaving an impression behind his body. An observation of little importance -- I could have the damage to the wall repaired later. My gloved hand is wrapped neatly around his throat, my grip subduing any attempts of escape. His wings flutter uselessly at his back, his legs flailing in an attempt to kick me off. His hands claw at my sleeve, nearly ruining the fabric, and I apply pressure to discourage him from doing so. The brazen demon stops almost immediately, prioritizing the utility of his throat over the possibility of being released. With the addition of greater pressure, it is only a moment before he stops struggling. Instead, he only glares at me with an immeasurable wrath.

“You bastard --”

“You would do well to remember your place.” I tighten my hold on his windpipe, and the words die in his throat. “It was only by my Lord’s generosity that you and your brothers were allowed to live after falling from grace. If you so much as pose a threat once more, I will ensure your long and painful eradication from this world. Do I make myself clear?”

I do not wait for an answer. He collapses to the floor the moment I release his throat, gasping for air. Cursing me in every manner possible. I simply continue to walk down the corridor until the choked gasps are nothing but a distant clamor, the false moonlight illuminating my path.

* * *

The dim light of the lamp flickers against the walls of the room, the strange shadows dancing indiscriminately against the otherwise plain design. Providing me with some form of entertainment. The bottle of the liqueur had uncorked easily, as anticipated. Twenty-seven seconds to the measured amount into a small glass, place the glass onto the nightstand, and set the bottle aside. Five minutes for me to wait patiently at her bedside, preoccupying myself with the rustle of clothing beyond the door. Six minutes and eight seconds for me to instead preoccupy myself with the movement of the shadows against the wall, my boredom beginning to rise to the surface. And then it is seven minutes and nineteen seconds for my gaze to flicker occasionally to the bathroom door, the lack of sound now concerning.

As well as mildly irritating. While she had expressed an average of eleven minutes, two seconds, and fifty-three milliseconds to undress and redress completely in the past, the current duration has set itself far apart from the times that I can recall. An abnormality.

And so it would be completely acceptable for me to check on her.

I knock briefly, allowing a moment for her to respond verbally. Nothing. I turn the handle and open the door as slowly as possible so as to not startle her, given her current condition.

Her dark eyes meet mine in a matter of milliseconds, the surprise registered fully in her gaze. As well as an element of embarrassment. She smiles sheepishly at me, a hand hovering just over the buttons of her oversized pajamas. The other has phased completely through the fabric.

“What a -- what a surprise, Barbatos,” she says, attempting to distract me from the current issue. “Come here often?”

I sigh. “You do realize I am at your service.”

“I don’t need it.”

“Then I imagine you plan to spend the rest of the night half-clothed and partially transparent.”

“Yes.”

I stride over to her, no longer able to contain my impatience. It is little work for me to undo the hand in question from her pajamas, but it appears that her attempts to fasten the rest of the garment have gone just as well. The misalignment of the buttons on the silk blouse have forced it to sit crooked on her small form, nearly slipping off a shoulder, and I am forced to undo the buttons from bottom-up to remedy her mistakes.

I do not think of the soft olive tone of her skin as I do so, nor do I pay attention to the form of her small breasts beneath the silk. I do not think of the collarbones to which I have pressed innumerable kisses and bruises, nor do I think of the outline of the small waist that I have held over and over again to position myself within her. I do not think of the dark curls that I have used to anchor her in place as I took her from behind, nor do I think of the slickness of her channel as I did so. I do not think of the soft curve of the mouth that I have violated, the sighs of pleasure that had left that mouth, or the cruelty with which I had taken her time and time again.

In fact, I think of nothing at all.

Maria is perched on the edge of her bed some twelve minutes and twenty seconds later, the glass cradled delicately in her small hands. A pink sleeve threatens to fall into the glass, precarious as it is on her wrist, but she pushes it up before it can do so. She regards the amber liquid with some apprehension, despite all logical reasoning that would argue against her action. Or inaction, one could consider it. I can imagine very few reasons why one would attempt to poison a dead human. Yet there is that quiet, awkward pause, her inaction speaking at a much greater volume.

I don’t trust you, it says, the hesitation piercing me through and through. How could I trust you after that? How could anyone?

I try to disregard the thoughts.

“I appreciate you giving me a nightcap, but isn’t this a little too much?” she remarks, finally reaching to receive the glass from the nightstand. She studies the liqueur for a few moments, swirling the amber liquid into itself. “I’m pretty sure you aren’t supposed to have a nightcap seven days in a row. I don’t sleep that badly.”

“You’re right,” I concede. “You don’t sleep at all.”

She regards me with indignation, huffing slightly, but says nothing on the matter. Not that she would have achieved much success with the argument. Between the shadows under her eyes and her near-constant state of fainting, there lies little room for doubt as to the cause.

More importantly, rest is essential to the execution of her plan. If we are to depart for the Celestial Realm tomorrow, she must rest as much as she can now.

I sigh. “Regardless of the matter, it is important that you continue to experience familiar sensations and activities. Lord Diavolo has instructed that I ensure your well-being.”

“I didn’t realize ensuring my well-being meant giving me alcohol at every opportunity,” she remarks. She inches forward on the edge of the bed, cradling the glass. Her feet are still some distance from the floor. “If you wanted to get me drunk, I’m pretty sure there are better ways to go about it. It would be faster, at least.”

“Providing a measured amount of alcohol every night does not qualify as every opportunity.”

“Yes, but --”

“Maria.” I pinch the bridge of my nose, suppressing yet another sigh. “Could you please just drink it?”

Her gaze flickers from me to the glass, a smile beginning to play at her lips. “And if I don’t?”

“Do you always have to be so insufferable?”

It is a long moment -- Maria holding the glass, me restraining myself from simply forcing the liquid into her mouth -- but she relents eventually, tipping her head back as she partakes of the liqueur. Still, I am thankful for it. It is only when she is at her most difficult and insufferable that I can  pretend that there lies no distance between us. That I had not created this barrier that stands between us.

She places the drained glass on the table after she finishes, a flush beginning to make itself known on her cheeks. Or perhaps that is only because I want there to be.

“How about you tell me something?” she suggests, pulling a rather large pillow over her body. The dim light of the lamp flickers, casting a shadow over her features as she regards me. I reach to turn it off.

“Provide an example.”

She drums her fingers against the surface of the pillow, thinking. “I don’t know. Something nice.”

“I don’t have any bedtime stories for you on hand.”

“Not -- not like that!” she protests, inching closer to the edge of the bed. I consciously keep a respectable distance away from her, standing by the window. “I just -- I think your voice is nice. Maybe if you stay and talk to me for a bit I’ll go to sleep.”

I look at her for a long moment, studying her features in the dark. Searching for some unspoken meaning within the request. Her eyes are unfocused in the dark, her lack of physical capabilities affecting her even in death, and so I do not bother to hide my scrutinization.

I can no longer see through her.

I sit on the bed beside her before she reconsider the request, closing the distance. Perhaps a little too quickly. She startles in place at the sudden movement, drawing into herself slightly -- but she fails to move. Chooses not to. There is only interest in her eyes when I meet her gaze. For the first time in weeks, I feel the barrier between us slipping, if only by some marginal measurement.

“I believe I have informed you that I am at your service.”

* * *

An hour, fifty-three minutes, and two seconds have passed by the time I have finished, taking the both of us into the long hours of the night -- but she is asleep at last. Her dark curls spread themselves out onto the expanse of the pillow that she has wrapped herself around, giving the locks the appearance of a halo. Her small form is nearly swallowed whole by the fabric of her pajamas, the pale silk standing in contrast to the richness of her skin. She breathes easily, the nature of her slumber not at all like the fitful, restless one of my nightmares, and it is nearly soothing to watch her in such a state. To know that she has willingly and knowingly placed herself in such a vulnerable position before me. Which is just as well: if we are to leave tomorrow, it would be best that she depart fully rested.

The tale I had spun had not been completely insubstantial. I had spoken of a butcher, a slaughterhouse, and a lamb. An executioner, a corrupt judge, and a helpless onlooker. A hunter, a fur trader, and a rabbit. A dispassionate torturer, a greedy king, and an impressionable young prince. A list of grievances that the king had committed against even his own people, his conquests, and the justification for his execution.

Silently, I am glad to know that she had fallen unconscious long before the conclusion of my tale.

I should take my leave. Given that I have carried out my duties for the day, I have little reason to remain. And yet I cannot convince myself to do so. I find myself staring at her unconscious form, my eyes tracing the pleasing contours of her visage. Admiring the image of her parted lips against the pillow, the flutter of her dark eyelashes, and the flush that seems to have truly taken over her features, despite her current state. I find myself brushing away a stray curl that has fallen over her cheek. A gloved hand lingers briefly over her skin.

The light of the false moon spills over the both of us, illuminating us against the darkness that surrounds us. Nearly blinding me for a moment. I draw myself closer towards her, leaning over her smaller form. My lips brush the surface of her skin. Lingering.

If you couldn’t protect her then, what makes you think you can protect her now?

I pause at the echo of the churlish demon’s voice, the doubt hitting me full force. The guilt claws its way out from my thoughts, devouring me from the inside out -- and I straighten almost immediately. Place distance between myself and the human, my senses returning to their original state. The correct state. I make for the exit as quickly and quietly as possible, my footsteps a whisper in the expanse of the room.

The door closes quietly behind me.