#balancing motherhood and self-care

[365momme]

The Art of Saying No: Protecting Your Time and Energy

As moms, we often wear many hats—mother, worker, caregiver, chef, chauffeur, teacher, friend, and the list goes on. With so much to juggle, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and stretched far too thin. The result? Anxiety, burnout, and a constant sense of being pulled in too many directions. While we may have heard the phrase “self-care” countless times, the truth is, it’s more than just…

[rfyimmo]

My Quarter-Life Crisis is trying to kill me. | MillennialMomManifesto

My kid was watching a nursery rhyme that said "Don't throw your junk in my back yard, my backyard’s full," and I froze, my mind spiraling until I sank into the floor and cried, Summer Walker style. Panic attack? Adult tantrum? How many times are my peers and women of my generation finding ourselves in positions like this?... And Why...?

The more I gain the confidence to speak with my peers about instances like these or the catalysts for such, I realize things like this are happening to most of us right now. Our unhappiness is mentally & physically showing itself in our faith, health, mind, bodies, actions and reactions.

Sociologists say "Mid-Life" by today's standards is between ages 35-75 🧐

What do you count as middle-aged? At almost 30, I feel like I used to think this was it, but now, I refuse to accept that. All my life society and media showed us mid-life crises were usually for 30 or 40-something year old men buying sports cars and trading in their wives for newer models, but today what does that look like? 

I'm calling it a quarter life crisis (and not mid-life crisis) because if the people in the Bible lived hundreds of years & there are still Centenarian Blue Zones on this modern day planet, I hope this is not the middle. I hoping we have so much more to go. Most people want to live longer and climb the proverbial ladder quicker - so that's where the crisis kicks in. My peers and I are trying not to be crushed under student debt, living costs that don't match the wage gaps, and dreams we don't know how to make come true, but still daily haunt us. Queue the panic about not being where we thought we would by now or how much we feel we should have gotten accomplished and comparison to our peers' highlight reels online.

Being super is tough: It's a constant battle of figuring out when to use your powers (for good or for evil), balancing your secret identity, maintaining your energy and constantly improving your powers or learning new ones.

Good Vs. Evil: Remember that panic from earlier? You know, the panic enacted by milestones you thought you would reach by now? Write down what you want, how you want to get it, and form a timeline to make it happen. Seeing your plan on paper can help ground you.

Secret Identity: Make the best of this time! Even if it doesn’t feel like it, you are supposed to be here in this moment. There is more than one way to navigate life, careers, etc. Why else would there be so many paths if people were not meant to be different and explore different options. Do what works for you! Your powers are different form the supe next to you, and there are still muggles and mortals with no powers at all. Queue the Gratitude & Mindfullness.

Maintaining Energy: They say life gets better with age, so think of yourself and where you were 1, 3, 5, and even 10 years ago! You would KILL to know, do, have the things you do now & you learn daily how to do this life thing a little bit better than yesterday. Consider this quarter or midlife crisis a pitstop for refocus, weather this transition with reflection and grace for yourself. Identify the wisdom you have and apply it to new areas. 

"The purpose of your life is to find your gift, the work of life is to develop it, and the meaning of life is to give it away."

As far as Powers: I leave you with this quote:

"Midlife is when the primary operating system of your life shifts from the ego to the soul. It's a period when people start to rearrange what gives meaning to themselves."

As a 'SuperMom' This is How I'm Running on Sustainable & Renewable Energy:

While the early 20s and late teens are living their "Rich 'Hot Girl' Era", I'm trying to find my way into "Wealthy Hot Mom Era" who Dabbles in "Mob Wife."

✨A few Podcast Recommendations:🌤️

From Broken To Branding: B Simone on Nice & Neat

Highlighted Quote: "I wasn't protected as a child so I think that's where a lot of my comedy comes from I walk on eggshells a lot trying to people please and I have a lack of boundaries because I want you to like me because I need validation from other people instead of getting it internally I wasn't I wasn't protected so I feel like I did a lot to make adults happy around me that were supposed to be there to protect me but really didn't make me feel comfortable as a child"

You've Been BLOCKING Your BLESSINGS! | Tabitha Brown

Tia Mowry: You’re Unhappy and You Don’t Know it - Learn to Leave the Comfort of Being Unhappy

✨Here's my Money & Positivity Playlist (to help you see the bright side:)🌤️

About the Author: Proud milso & toddler mom. Lover of art, creative writing & blogging 🎨 Believing in the power of efficiency & innovation 🌟 Passionate about helping small businesses thrive 🚀 Avid traveler & coffee enthusiast ☕️✈️

I love meeting new people and hearing their stories. Whether you're a fellow mom, a small business owner, or just someone looking for a bit of inspiration, let's connect and support each other on this incredible journey.

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[the-cosmic-cauldron]

☽𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕄𝕠𝕠𝕟 𝕊𝕚𝕘𝕟 & 𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝔻𝕖𝕤𝕚𝕣𝕖 𝔽𝕠𝕣 ℙ𝕒𝕣𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕠𝕕 ☾

Welcome to 10 Days, 10 Posts from The Cosmic Cauldron! Over the next ten days, I’ll be sharing a blend of astrology and tarot posts, each designed to spark your curiosity and guide your journey. If you find my content interesting, fascinating, or engaging, be sure to click the follow button for more! Ready to dive deeper into your personal journey? Head to my homepage and book a reading — you won’t regret it.

☾ 𝒜𝓇𝒾ℯ𝓈 ℳℴℴ𝓃

An Aries Moon doesn’t typically desire to have children due to their strong sense of independence and fast-paced nature. When it comes to their emotions, Aries Moons are not the most patient—they don’t like to dwell on feelings or spend much time processing them. They’re also not naturally inclined toward self-compassion, often being hard on themselves.

Because of this, an Aries Moon may feel they would struggle with the emotional demands of parenting. They might worry about being too tough on a child or failing to provide the kind of emotional support a child needs. As a result, an Aries Moon doesn’t usually see parenthood as a natural fit for their personality.

However, there are exceptions. Aries Moons are ruled by Mars, which governs passion and intimacy. When deeply in love, an Aries Moon may feel inspired to have children, especially since their Mars-driven energy often leads them to seek physical closeness and intimacy frequently. In such cases, if they believe their partner would be a good parent or that their partner balances their own emotional tendencies, they may decide to start a family.

Interestingly, Aries Moons are not naturally drawn to the nurturing, emotional aspects of motherhood. However, Aries Moon men may be more open to fatherhood. The idea of leading a family and taking on a protective, leadership role aligns with the fiery and ambitious energy of this placement. This makes fatherhood more appealing to them than the emotionally intensive aspects of parenting.

☾𝒯𝒶𝓊𝓇𝓊𝓈 ℳℴℴ𝓃

A Taurus Moon typically has a strong desire to become a parent, largely because they are natural nurturers who enjoy giving and caring for others. This nurturing energy often seeks an outlet, and the most traditional vessel for that is raising children. Taurus Moons, especially women, are often drawn to the idea of parenthood for this reason.

The energy of Taurus is ruled by practicality, which means many Taurus Moons view having children as a natural extension of a relationship or a fulfilling part of building a family. They may also see raising children as an opportunity to nurture and guide them into becoming healthy, well-rounded adults, or to provide experiences they themselves may not have had growing up.

Taurus Moons are especially likely to want children when they are in love. They enjoy the idea of extending the love they share with their partner to a child, creating balance and harmony within the relationship. For them, the connection between parenthood and love is deeply fulfilling.

In addition, Taurus Moons are drawn to parenthood when they feel stable. This stability doesn’t necessarily mean being wealthy or having every aspect of life figured out. Instead, it’s about being in a comfortable, steady routine where they are financially secure and content with their day-to-day life. Taurus Moons thrive when they are preoccupied with meaningful tasks, and raising a child fits perfectly into their desire for purpose and responsibility.

Men with a Taurus Moon also have a nurturing side and are likely to want children. They often see parenthood as a natural step in a serious relationship, thinking, “She could be the mother of my child.” Taurus Moon men are drawn to the essence of family and enjoy the grounding, fulfilling experience of building a close-knit unit of their own. The idea of having a family brings them a deep sense of stability and belonging.

☾𝒢ℯ𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒾 ℳℴℴ𝓃

Gemini Moons have a 50-50 split when it comes to wanting to be parents. Some Gemini Moons are not interested in parenthood at all, primarily because they value their freedom and love living in the moment. They enjoy the ability to be spontaneous and on the go, and they don’t want to feel confined by the responsibilities of parenting. For these individuals, the idea of having children just doesn’t align with their desire for independence and restlessness.

However, there are also Gemini Moons who find parenthood incredibly intriguing. They are curious about the process of raising a child and are fascinated by how their child will turn out. These individuals often see parenting as a unique experience and are interested in approaching it in an unconventional way. They may want to channel their own personalities into their parenting style, aiming to be unique or “out-of-the-box” parents. For these Gemini Moons, the idea of parenthood becomes appealing due to their curiosity and the desire to explore this new and exciting role.

☾𝒞𝒶𝓃𝒸ℯ𝓇 ℳℴℴ𝓃

Cancer Moons usually want to be parents because they are natural homebodies who love the comfort of their homes. They take pleasure in creating a beautiful and cozy environment and enjoy spending time there. Children often spark their interest because Cancer Moons are inherently nurturing. They have a deep desire to care for and nurture something, and children represent a traditional way to channel that nurturing energy. Many Cancer Moons also want to connect emotionally with their children, especially if they had their own emotions dismissed growing up or didn’t feel they were treated in the way they desired. For these individuals, parenthood is an opportunity to reinvent parenting and be the kind of parent who not only nurtures a child with practical support but also offers emotional care, protection, and a strong presence. They aim to listen to, connect with, and truly show up for their child.

However, some Cancer Moons may choose not to have children, especially if they feel emotionally unstable. Because Cancer Moons are highly emotional beings, if they believe their emotions are too unbalanced to provide the stability a child needs, they may decide against parenthood. A Cancer Moon desires to be a great parent, and if they feel their emotional state is not conducive to that, they will hesitate to bring a child into the world.

Both Cancer Moon men and women generally want to be parents, as they crave the deep emotional connection with their children. The presence of children and the idea of having a family often make Cancer Moons feel more complete and fulfilled.

☾ℒℯℴ ℳℴℴ𝓃

A Leo Moon will definitely want to have a family, as Leo is all about close-knit connections and feeling validated by those around them. For many Leo Moons, parenthood is a highly validating experience. It allows them to feel a sense of accomplishment, particularly if they didn’t succeed in certain areas of life. They often see having a child as an opportunity to support and nurture that child’s growth, helping them succeed, bloom, and feel creative. Leo Moons are naturally inclined toward parenthood because they want to guide their children to achieve greatness.

However, there is a small percentage of Leo Moons who may struggle with parenthood. Leo Moons can sometimes crave being the center of attention and might feel that a child will divert attention away from them or their relationship with a partner. In these cases, they might delay having children to fully enjoy their time with their partner or focus on themselves. They may fear that having a child without having these experiences first could lead them to preoccupy themselves with personal desires, rather than being fully present and supportive for their child.

Overall, though, Leo Moons do desire to have children. They view parenthood as a positive and fulfilling experience. Given that the Sun, their ruling planet, represents fatherhood, many Leo Moon men especially see fatherhood as a significant and rewarding part of life.

☾𝒱𝒾𝓇𝑔ℴ ℳℴℴ𝓃

A Virgo Moon typically doesn’t want to have children, and the reason is that Virgo Moons are not necessarily focused on service within the family context. They tend to be more service-oriented in their work, school, or other responsibilities. Unlike Cancer Moons, who are naturally nurturing and motherly towards children and family, Virgo Moons are more likely to show up and perform at a job or take on responsibilities. They are humble, adaptable, and willing to compromise in those areas, as they are a mutable sign.

However, when it comes to their personal lives, Virgo Moons are more introverted and detached at times, as they tend to be very analytical rather than emotionally engaged. A Virgo Moon would typically only want to become a parent if they were in a stable relationship and felt prepared for children. For a Virgo Moon, having the necessary stability in their life is essential before they would consider having a child.

Virgo Moons are also likely to become parents even if they don’t initially want to, simply because they are adaptable. If their partner wants children, they may be the type to go along with it, especially since they can have self-sacrificial tendencies and are generally inclined to be of service to others. However, they don’t naturally yearn for children. They are more preoccupied with their routines and don’t feel a strong urge to become parents on their own.

That said, if they’re in a good relationship and feel that having children is the next step, they will likely have children. But Virgo Moons are not typically drawn to parenthood as a natural desire.

☾ℒ𝒾𝒷𝓇𝒶 ℳℴℴ𝓃

Libra Moons are likely to want to be parents, and the reason is that they often see their children as friends. Libra Moons are very social beings, and in this placement, they are even more social because emotionally, they like to talk about their feelings and seek harmony in their relationships. Even if a Libra Moon initially didn’t want children, their verbal nature and desire for harmony would likely lead them to go along with the idea. If they feel that having children would bring harmony to their relationship or life, they would be open to the idea.

Additionally, because Libra is a cardinal sign, they are more likely to take the initiative and express a desire to have children. With Libra being ruled by Venus, which is associated with relationships, Libra Moons often feel more at peace when they’re in a relationship than when they’re single. This constant seeking of connection may lead them to want children, as they idealize the concept of family. Even if they were initially against having children, they might eventually decide to have one, as they crave the peace and balance that a family could bring.

Furthermore, Libra Moons are ruled by Venusian energy, which is centered around love, beauty, and giving. This energy makes them feel fulfilled when they can nurture and give to others. A Libra Moon might feel that having a child is a way to channel this nurturing energy and offer love and care in a way that aligns with their desire to give and nurture those they love.

☾𝒮𝒸ℴ𝓇𝓅𝒾ℴ ℳℴℴ𝓃

A Scorpio Moon can be a bit tricky when it comes to wanting children. Many Scorpio Moons may not feel ready for parenthood because they carry a lot of unresolved trauma and deep, intense emotions. Their life experiences tend to be very intense, and some may feel apprehensive about having children. There’s often a fear surrounding parenthood, especially given the vulnerability involved in pregnancy and childbirth. For many, the thought of holding a child and the emotional and physical shifts that come with parenting can feel daunting.

Scorpio Moons already deal with emotional imbalances, such as depression, sadness, and heavy emotions. As a result, some may be afraid of experiencing postpartum depression or the emotional changes that come with becoming a parent. There may be a fear of not being able to show up for their child in the way they want to, given their emotional complexity. For some Scorpio Moons, the idea of having a child might lead them to consider alternatives like surrogacy or IVF, as they might not want to carry the child themselves due to these fears.

However, there are also Scorpio Moons who are deeply passionate about having children. These individuals may feel that they haven’t experienced true love in their lives and see a child as a source of unconditional love, something they feel they’ve been missing in their own relationships. For them, having a child may fill a void and provide the deep connection they long for. So, for Scorpio Moons, it’s really a 50/50 situation—some may want children, while others may be more hesitant or fearful.

☾𝒮𝒶𝑔𝒾𝓉𝓉𝒶𝓇𝒾𝓊𝓈 ℳℴℴ𝓃

I would say that Sagittarius Moons are also very 50-50 when it comes to having children. For some Sagittarius Moons, they are so on the go, always engaged in new adventures, interests, and traveling, that the idea of having children doesn’t really cross their minds. They are constantly stimulated by new experiences, and for some of them, the thought of having a child feels limiting to their freedom. They may even think that if they were to get someone pregnant, they wouldn’t stick around for the pregnancy because they’re focused on their own pursuits. For Sagittarius Moon men, they might prefer doing their own thing, while for women, some may feel like motherhood would be too restrictive, as they crave the freedom to enjoy life and travel.

However, there’s another side to Sagittarius Moons that really embraces the idea of having children. Some see themselves as children at heart and get excited around kids. They enjoy being around children, having fun with them, and often think of parenthood as a fun adventure rather than something serious or deep. For these Sagittarius Moons, having a child doesn’t require a deep commitment or a stable relationship with someone. They may not even feel the need to be married or have a traditional family setup, as they view having children as a source of joy and a new, exciting chapter in their lives. They see children as a blessing and an opportunity for more happiness and adventure, and they want to experience it.

☾𝒞𝒶𝓅𝓇𝒾𝒸ℴ𝓇𝓃 ℳℴℴ𝓃

With Capricorn Moons, it’s a bit of a mixed bag. While many Capricorn Moons may not desire to be parents, a significant number of them do. Here’s why: Some Capricorn Moons can be very dark, deep, and reserved. They carry a lot of wounds and trauma, and they often feel emotionally restrained. For these individuals, the idea of having children may not appeal to them at all—it can seem like just another responsibility to take on, which doesn’t excite them. They may prefer to dedicate their lives to themselves, even if it seems selfish, rather than take on the responsibility of raising a child.

However, for other Capricorn Moons, the desire to have children is tied to their drive for accomplishment. These individuals often seek a sense of fulfillment in life, and for some, part of that fulfillment comes from having a family. For them, having children aligns with their vision of a successful, traditional life. They may feel like they haven’t fully accomplished what they set out to do if they don’t have children. It’s not so much that having children is their main goal, but more that it’s an integral part of their overall life goals. For these Capricorn Moons, becoming a parent is something they may feel compelled to do in order to feel that they’ve truly achieved the life they desire.

☾ 𝒜𝓆𝓊𝒶𝓇𝒾𝓊𝓈 ℳℴℴ𝓃

Aquarius Moons typically want children when they feel surrounded by a supportive community. This is when they are most likely to desire parenthood, as Aquarians are independent but also enjoy being part of groups and communities. While it may not always be about family, they feel that a child can bring blessings to their environment. Aquarius Moons often see the bigger picture, thinking about how having a child could impact not just themselves, but others, such as making their parents grandparents or their siblings uncles or aunts. This sense of community and connection can inspire them to want children.

However, many Aquarius Moons may not want children because they tend to live somewhat erratic lives. Their emotional state can be unpredictable, which makes them hesitant about the consistency and stability required in parenthood. They value their freedom and may not want to feel tied down to the responsibilities of being a parent.

For the Aquarius Moon individuals who do decide to become parents, their approach is often unconventional. Their parenting style might be unique, and they may be somewhat disciplinary, as Aquarius is a fixed sign ruled by Saturn and Uranus. These placements can make them more rigid, but also prone to sudden shifts in behavior or unpredictability. Aquarius Moon men may be more likely to embrace parenthood than women, as women with this placement can come across as strict or cold, influenced by Saturn’s restrictive energy. However, the unpredictable nature of Uranus can lead to sudden changes in their parenting style, making it challenging to maintain consistency.

☾𝒫𝒾𝓈𝒸ℯ𝓈 ℳℴℴ𝓃

Pisces Moons are likely to want to be parents because they have an abundance of unconditional love to give. They seek a place where this love can be expressed, and they often feel that the innocence of a child is most deserving of their compassion, empathy, and care. Pisces Moons are deeply sensitive beings, and they tend to want to connect with their children on a profound level, getting into their children’s minds and hearts. For many Pisces Moons, the desire to be a parent feels like a natural extension of their loving, giving nature.

However, for some Pisces Moons, especially those who have experienced significant struggles, such as being escapist, dealing with addiction, or struggling with practicality in life, the desire to be a parent may not emerge. If a Pisces Moon is in a state where they feel lost, neglected, or stuck in a cycle of despair, they may not want children. In these cases, they might recognize that they cannot offer the stability or care a child needs, and the idea of neglecting a child would weigh heavily on their conscience. While Pisces Moons naturally have a strong inclination toward parenthood, when they are in a difficult space, it can make it hard for them to desire or pursue that outcome.

[irene2025]

Always remind yourself 🌹

[theblackfemininesociety]

Mastering Time Management: A Love Letter to Our Besties 💝

Hey there, beautiful souls of the BFS! 💋

As your accountability partner, it’s important we express how important it is to master one game-changing skill: time management. As we juggle our 9-5s, motherhood, college assignments, and entrepreneurial dreams, managing our time effectively can feel like an uphill battle. But fear not, because we are going to show you how mastering these skills can help us avoid burnout and lead us to a more balanced, fulfilling life.

📝 The Power of a Planner

First things first: if you haven’t already, it’s time to invest in a cute physical planner! There’s something magical about putting pen to paper and mapping out your days. A planner not only helps you organize your tasks but also serves as a motivational tool. When you have a beautiful planner in your hands, it becomes easier to look forward to planning your week, setting goals, and checking things off your list.

Here are our top picks for planners that will inspire you to stay on track:

The Bookd store: Their planners are not just functional but also aesthetically pleasing, making planning a delightful experience.

Visit The Bookd store: HERE

Girls with Goals and Bankrolls: This planner empowers you to set your goals and achieve them, all while keeping your style in check.

Visit Girls with Goals ans Bankrolls: HERE

By writing down your tasks, you’re not just keeping track; you’re taking control of your life, one day at a time.

💤 Sleep is Your Superpower

Next up, let’s talk about the importance of sleep. We live in a society that often glorifies busyness, leading us to believe that sacrificing sleep is a badge of honor. But let’s get real: prioritizing sleep is crucial for our mental and physical health. Going to bed early allows your body to recharge, enhances your focus, and improves your mood.

When you wake up feeling refreshed, you’re more productive, creative, and ready to tackle whatever life throws your way. Plus, a good night’s sleep can help you approach challenges with a clear mind, reducing the chances of feeling overwhelmed.

😵‍💫 Avoiding Burnout

Now, let’s connect the dots: mastering time management helps us avoid burnout. When we learn to manage our time effectively, we create space for self-care, relaxation, and time with our loved ones. This is especially important for our 9-5 warriors, multitasking mothers, ambitious college students, and fierce entrepreneurs.

By prioritizing tasks, setting boundaries, and scheduling breaks, you’ll find that you can accomplish more without feeling drained. This balanced approach will not only improve your productivity but also allow you to enjoy the journey. After all, life is meant to be lived, not just endured!

Ladies, let’s commit to mastering time management together. Grab that planner, prioritize your sleep, and watch how these small changes can lead to significant transformations in your life.

💌Note: you are worthy of balance, joy, and fulfillment. By taking charge of your time, you’re not just avoiding burnout; you’re creating a life that reflects your dreams and values.

We have had an open discussion about avoiding burnout; view that post here

So, who’s ready to conquer their days with intention?

✨ HOW TO STAY ON TRACK?

Join our “Ladies Room” group chat: HERE !

Follow us on: Instagram • TikTok • Facebook

[astrolovecosmos]

Demeter: Bond Between Mother and Child

The asteroid Demeter (1108) has a focus on the protectiveness and intense emotions and instincts associated with motherhood. May have slight a focus on mother-daughter relationships, but this can still be looked at through the lens of any parent-child relationship. It can embody what you are willing to do for your child.

Demeter in Aries: A fiercely protective and assertive mother figure, embodying a warrior-like instinct when it comes to safeguarding and providing for children. Has a proactive nurturing, where the mothering/parenting role is driven by action, independence, and a readiness to fight for loved ones. Shows love through bold, hands-on care, prioritizing children's needs with strong leadership. Can be impatient and impulsive with children, their anger being the main tool they use to protect and guide which has its power and problems.

Demeter in Taurus: Likely patient, consistent, and stable in their nurturing instincts. Their mothering/parenting instinct can also be very strong and come naturally. This placement emphasizes the importance of providing material security, comfort, and a nurturing home environment. They can be possessive and determined in how they protect and sacrifice for their children. Demeter is associated with Earth and it is debated whether she is connected to Taurus or Virgo. Causing a famine and disaster to get her child back.

Demeter in Gemini: Is engaging, communicative, and playful in their bond with their child. They foster mental growth, encouraging learning, conversation, and versatility in their children. May allow their children plenty of freedom and may not seem traditionally protective. However they will use their intellect, flexibility, and swiftness to protect their children. May struggle with inconsistency or spreading themselves too thin in efforts to provide. Always open to a good or new idea from those they trust or their own children.

Demeter in Cancer: Has deep, powerful mothering/parenting instincts. They focus on creating a safe, loving, and comforting home. Demeter in Cancer is highly sensitive to the emotional needs of their children, offering unconditional care, empathy, and close emotional bonding. They can be overprotective with a passion and intensity that rivals Demeter herself. Can be clingy and won't hesitate to use manipulation if they think it is for the best.

Demeter in Leo: Expresses a nurturing style that is proud, generous, and infused with warmth and creativity. Instinct is focused on instilling confidence, individuality, and a sense of personal pride in their children. Provides through attention, affection, and encouraging self-expression, often taking on a leadership role in their family and shining as a central figure in their lives. I have read this placement as "taking their parenting duties or protection too far", but can you really take things "too far" or "too extreme" for your children? Maybe their overbearing side can manifest negatively. May seek validation from their family or outsiders for being a parent.

Demeter in Virgo: Focuses greatly on nurturing the health and minds of their children. Will go to great lengths to provide. Shows mothering/parenting instincts through acts of service, offering practical solutions and care, and by being thoughtful. Strives for the best for their family. Can be critical and negative at times to their kids. In the myth with Persephone it describes Demeter's great worry and frantic destruction searching for her daughter, on par with Virgo's famous engulfing worry. Even a Virgo mother will sacrifice their devotion and duties for their children.

Demeter in Libra: Teaches their children cooperation and fairness. Nurtures by encouraging diplomacy, emotional balance, and strong social connections, often prioritizing children's social wellbeing and sense of justice. Provides through emotional support and creating a sense of unity, though they may sometimes struggle with indecision or placing too much emphasis on maintaining harmony at the expense of addressing deeper emotional needs.

Demeter in Scorpio: Will be intensely protective but also loving. Has a mothering/parenting instinct marked by loyalty and a powerful drive to shield loved ones from harm, both emotionally and physically. Demeter in Scorpio provides through profound emotional connection, often diving deep into their children's inner worlds to understand and guide them through life's challenges. Nurtures with unwavering devotion, but may struggle with possessiveness or control, as their protective instincts can sometimes verge on being overwhelming or secretive in their efforts to safeguard family.

Demeter in Sagittarius: This mother or parent nurtures their children's independence, curiosity, and maybe passion. They may be most protective over the information and beliefs their children are exposed to. Their instincts may feel ancient, natural, and impulsive. When it comes to protecting their family they take the approach of empowering their children. Teaching them to be strong and encourages developing resilience via experience. They can at times have a temper, be highly hands-off, or lack emotional closeness or reassurance.

Demeter in Capricorn: Is focused on security, providing, and boundaries. This placement emphasizes care through structure, practical support, and ensuring their family has the resources and stability they need to survive and succeed. Their nurturing comes through actions rather than words, offering a reliable, steady presence, though they may sometimes struggle with being emotionally cold or overly stern.

Demeter in Aquarius: Will make an effort to appreciate, recognize, and/or truly get to know their child on an individual level. May have some sort of unconventional bond with their children. Maybe they act more as a friend or advisor or maybe they give them advice that isn't common or raise them in a way not inline with their society. Demeter in Aquarius protects by teaching loved ones to be self-focused and adaptable in the face of societal changes. They often support their children in pursuing their ideals, causes, passions, or callings. They can be emotionally detached, unaffectionate, or hard to understand.

Demeter in Pisces: Highlights a mothering/parenting instinct rooted in emotional connection, spiritual care, and a strong sense of empathy for their family's feelings and needs. Demeter in Pisces protects by creating a safe, loving, and emotionally supportive environment, often acting as a healer or emotional anchor for loved ones. May sometimes struggle with boundaries or become overwhelmed by family's emotional needs, as their instinct to care can lead to self-sacrifice or overextension.

[theartofcollapse]

Baaaabe this time I'm not coming with a Olivia request 🤭

Could you write a fic Rollins x Reader where reader is a new solo mom getting back in the work field and find in Rollins a village 🥹 if you can, do it with a looooot of fluffy

a/n: thank you for your request summary:read it above pairing:Amanda Rollins x female reader warnings: none word count: 866

masterlist

A Village in You - Amanda Rollins

It was your first day back in the workforce after two years of being a stay-at-home mom. You’d taken time off to care for your daughter, Ellie, now an energetic two-year-old who loved dinosaurs, chocolate milk, and sleeping exclusively in your bed. You were nervous. Excited, sure, but mostly nervous. Finding the balance between motherhood and a demanding new job wasn’t something you’d mastered yet or even attempted.

Your first day at the 16th Precinct had been overwhelming in every way possible. Meeting new coworkers, learning the ropes, and reminding yourself not to accidentally call your boss “sweetie” like you did your toddler was enough to make your head spin. But what stood out the most was Amanda Rollins.

From the moment Amanda introduced herself, she made you feel at ease. There was something warm and approachable about her, like she instinctively understood how intimidating this transition was for you. Her Southern drawl softened her words, and her easy smile felt like a hand reaching out to steady you.

“You holding up okay, Y/N?” Amanda asked later that afternoon as the two of you walked out of the precinct. She’d noticed the slight sag in your shoulders and the faraway look you got when you checked your phone for updates from Ellie’s babysitter.

“Yeah, I think so. It’s just… a lot,” you admitted, adjusting the strap of your bag. “I haven’t done this in a while. I keep worrying I’ll mess something up at work or that Ellie will forget I’m her mom because I’m not with her 24/7 anymore.”

Amanda chuckled softly. “Trust me, I get it. I’ve got two kids myself. Balancing this job and being a mom? Not easy. But you’re doin’ great. And Ellie? She’s lucky to have a mom who cares this much.”

Her words were like balm to the self-doubt clawing at your chest. You hadn’t expected anyone to notice how much you were struggling, let alone reassure you.

“Thanks, Amanda. That… means a lot,” you said, offering a shy smile.

From that day on, Amanda became your unofficial support system.

Over the next few weeks, Amanda was always there, in ways big and small. She was the one who showed you the fastest way to get through the mountain of paperwork. She had a knack for stepping in when a suspect’s attitude made you feel out of your depth. And when you had to leave early because Ellie had a fever, Amanda waved off your apologies with a firm, “Family comes first, Y/N. Always.”

One evening, after a particularly grueling case, Amanda insisted on driving you home. You hesitated, not wanting to impose, but she was already opening the passenger door for you.

When you got to your apartment, Ellie toddled over to greet you with open arms and a chorus of giggles. Amanda’s face softened at the sight.

“This is Ellie,” you introduced, scooping her up. “Ellie, this is Amanda.”

“’Manda,” Ellie repeated, grinning at the new face.

Amanda’s heart melted. “Well, hey there, sweet pea. You’re even cuter than your mom said.”

Ellie giggled harder, clearly charmed, and Amanda stayed for dinner that night. It became the first of many nights where she would join you, sometimes bringing dessert or toys for Ellie, always bringing her warmth and calm presence.

As months passed, Amanda became part of your routine. She was there for daycare pickups when your shifts ran late, quick coffee runs that turned into life advice sessions, and the occasional impromptu movie night when Ellie demanded an audience for her dramatic reenactments of The Land Before Time.

One rainy Saturday afternoon, Amanda showed up at your door with a bag of groceries and an umbrella. “Figured you could use a little help,” she said casually, though the kindness in her eyes betrayed her words.

The three of you spent the afternoon baking cookies (well, you and Amanda baked while Ellie spilled flour everywhere) and playing board games. At some point, Ellie fell asleep on the couch, clutching Amanda’s hand.

“She adores you,” you said softly, watching the scene unfold.

Amanda looked at you, her expression tender. “The feelin’s mutual.”

You hesitated before speaking again, your heart pounding. “I don’t know how I would’ve done any of this without you, Amanda. I mean it. You’ve been… everything I didn’t know I needed.”

Amanda’s gaze held yours, her voice quiet but steady. “Y/N, you don’t have to do this alone. I’m here. For you and Ellie. Always.”

Her words settled over you like a promise, and for the first time in a long time, you felt like you weren’t just surviving, you were thriving, thanks to her.

It wasn’t long before Amanda was more than just a coworker, more than a friend. She became the one who reminded you that you didn’t have to carry it all alone. And in her, you found something you hadn’t expected. A partner, a confidant, and the love you’d always dreamed of.

As Ellie stirred awake that evening, blinking up at Amanda with sleepy eyes, you couldn’t help but smile. For the first time, your little family felt complete.

And it was all because of her.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.201 Miracles

Once again, I took advantage of the dry weather, daring Mother Nature to trick me again. I grabbed the toolbox and got back to work on the treehouse. I wish I could tell you I made good, uninterrupted progress. It was Rosie this time who pulled me away. She hovered nearby the entire time, so I stopped and gave her what she wanted. She's only clingy like that for two reasons, and both of them require my undivided attention. We went for a long jog. When we returned, the house was dark, and my girls were fast asleep. The night was still young, and I wasn't ready to call it quite yet, so I had a personal care night. I'm ashamed to admit when I last did yoga, and my muscles were a lot tighter because of it. I really need to figure out how to balance taking care of myself and my life.

In the morning, I woke up to a big ruckus on the side of my house. It sounded like a loud motor, so I got up to see what was going on. To my surprise, my sister caused the racket, and she was weeding the money tree! I can't lie; I felt myself tearing up. Alessia is one of the most self-centered sims I know. There's been almost nothing she's done or said that didn't benefit her. I mean, the woman skipped my engagement dinner because she didn't feel like going, and she was my sim of honor. But there she was, in my side yard, caring for my tree. Whether it's the kids softening her, or she's finally maturing, I'm so grateful to see her considering others' needs.

"Hey, sis. What are you doing out here?"

"Oh! Did I wake you?"

"Yeah, but it's cool, I guess."

"Sorry. I never saw a tree like this, so I came to get a closer look. When I saw the weeds, I figured I may as well. What is this, anyway?"

"I appreciate you doing that. This is my wedding gift from Dub. It's a money tree."

She gasped.

"They're real?!"

"Right? I didn't think they were either."

"Wow. He's some friend."

"Yeah. He's the best."

I rarely have opportunities to be up close and personal with my sister. Her eyes look tired, and I realized I don't actually know what's going on in her life.

"How are you doing, Less? Like, really."

She shrugged.

"I'm alright, I guess."

"Really, Less?"

She shrugged lackadaisically again. Some things about her will never change.

"There's not much to tell. I have my kids and boring job so they don't eat me."

I laughed so loud. Good thing we don't have neighbors right next to us.

"What about Jace?" I asked. "You heard from him?"

"Nope."

"Damn. I was really hoping he'd step up."

"He'd have to be a man to do that."

"HA! Okay, you got me there."

I had another question I was afraid to ask. The last time I asked it, I got WAY more than I bargained for. But I really wanted an answer. I promised Mama I would look after her, and I can't quite do that if I don't know what I'm dealing with.

"So...are you seeing anyone?"

"When the hell would I have time for that?"

"Touché. You should make time, though. I don't want you to feel like you're trapped in the house with the kids all the time. That's why we moved here, remember?"

"Yeah. I know. The truth is, I kinda like those little gremlins. I thought I'd hate motherhood and being tied down, but..."

"Yeah. Kids have a way of melting your heart."

"They do. I'll get back out there at some point, but for now, I'm cool with just me and my three."

Has Winterfest come early? Because I've just witnessed two miracles, ha!

"I'm really glad to hear that. I always worried about how this would go for you because...you know. Happy to know you're enjoying the journey. Mama would be so proud of you..."

The latch on the gate behind us clicks. My cute little shadow walks through, looking like she's on a mission.

"Auntie Lessia, can Breanna come play?"

"Des, it's not even 8 a.m.," I said. "Give them time to get dressed and eat breakfast."

"She can spend the day with us, you know," Alessia suggested.

As much as I love my sister, she was never on my list of potential babysitters. It's not that I don't trust her or I think she won't take care of my child because I know she will; I've seen it. I've just always been painfully aware of her situation and didn't want to add to her stress. But given what she just told me, maybe we can change that.

"Are you sure? You have your hands full already."

"It's cool, Luca. What's one more child? Besides, having her over will help me. With all four of them together, everyone will have a playmate. That frees to do other things."

I never thought of it that way.

"True. Well...yeah, okay. If you're cool with it, I'm down."

"You want to help me make breakfast?" she asked Desiree.

"Okay," Desiree shouted.

"You're such a little sweetie."

"By the way," she said to me, "I'm still very upset you got the blue-eyed child. Like, what in the world??"

"I guess the Watcher loves me the best."

"Whatever! You look like a dork. What are you even wearing?? Looking like a freezer bunny threw up on you!"

[tarotbydelilah444]

pac: details of your future pregnancy + baby

hi guys, I’m back with another pac reading. This pac reading will be about your future baby + details about your future pregnancy. This reading is for entertainment purposes. I hope that you enjoy the reading and continue to keep following and sharing my posts, if you enjoy the content. Sending you love and light 🤍✨ - Delilah pile 1 | 🤎

Your pregnancy might be unexpected, so you were not expecting nor planning to have a baby when you find out. You could have been in denial or doubted that you were pregnant. You will definitely be shocked when you find out and try to hid this information from your person. For some, you could have strategically planned for this pregnancy without your partner knowing ( it may not have been in a malicious way), maybe you wanted a baby but your partner may not have been ready for one at the time.

Your partner will likely not be happy, but they won’t be mad about it either when they find out or when you tell them. They will likely confront you and you two will talk it out and kiss and make up in the end.

Your family will have very mixed feelings about the news of your pregnancy, but they will happy about the news for the most part. They will see this pregnancy as a blessing no matter the circumstances. They may see this baby/pregnancy as a miracle that will bring healing and reunite the family and bring balance into everyone’s life. Maybe you could have had issues with your family in the past, but this baby will put an end to any animosity/ issues within the family.

You will be glowing during your pregnancy. Motherhood will definitely look good on you and your baby will be healthy and growing. Everything will go well during your pregnancy journey. You may get spoiled a lot by others and your partner. You will be very relaxed and well taken care of. People will buy you gifts for the baby and you will start buying gifts and necessities for your baby before their birth. You will also be eating healthy and prioritizing you health to ensure a healthy pregnancy. Overall your pregnancy will be very peaceful and you will enjoy every moment and milestone during your pregnancy.

Your baby might be a girl. You and your partner might think it’s a boy, or you or your partner wanted a boy. Either way, you and your partner only care if the baby is healthy and whole. You could possibly have twins, so a boy and girl. Your baby/ies will be gifted, she/he/they will be able to hear and communicate with higher realms or spiritual beings. Your baby will be very aware and alert, they could also start talking or learning at a faster rate than most babies/toddlers. They will be very talkative as they age and self expression will be very important to this child. Your baby will be very intelligent as they mature. They will likely make good grades in school and they will like to learn a lot. They will be very loving, kind, caring, sensitive, independent, studious, curious, and dependable as they get older. Your baby will likely cry a lot, so you and your partner will not get much sleep for a while, but it will bring you and your partner much closer as you take in the joy of raising your child/children together. Your baby/babies could be a Gemini, Taurus, Capricorn, or Sagittarius.

channeled messages | straight textured hair, healing/self-love, healing family issues, surprised gender, spoiled-rotten, throat chakra, divine masculine, divine feminine, dark brown/black hair, brown eyes, black, or dark green eyes, angel baby, restless nights, blessed with beauty & grace, anxiety, and nightmares

pile 2 | 🧸

Your pregnancy will be exciting news that you have been waiting for, so a lot of you wanted to have a baby badly and you will be pretty excited and ready to share the news with your partner and others. You may announce your pregnancy to your partner in a creative way or in form of a present. You and your partner may make love after the news. You could have intuitively known that your were pregnant.

Your partner will be very happy about the news. They will literally get emotional once you tell them the news. This will only increase their love for you and they literally smother you with all forms of affection. They will be very supportive to you during the pregnancy.

Your family will be also happy and excited about the news. Someone may have already knew that you were pregnant, maybe they saw it in a dream or they could sensed it in general. Lots of calls and messages from your family and your person’s family to congratulate you and your partner. It will be a  welcoming and emotional experience for everyone.

You and your partner may move into a bigger home or will renovate your home to support your growing family. Your pregnancy will go very well and might go by very fast. You will feel very supported and loved through your pregnancy journey. Your family and friends might even plan you a baby shower and it will be quite a celebration. You will feel very stable, secured, and loved during your pregnancy. I also feel like you will be grateful for everything that you’ve been blessed with. You will likely like to be home a lot during your pregnancy with your partner preparing for your new arrival. You might have headaches or have a hard time sleeping while you are pregnant, so take it slow and try not to stress. You might have more dreams relating to your baby during your pregnancy.

Your baby may be a boy, but if you have a girl, she will likely have fire placements or masculine qualities, in regards to their personality. You and your partner are in it for a wild child. Your child will be a handful and likely a trouble maker. Your child will be very ferocious, brave, energetic, bratty, playful, and a ball of energy that refuses to be tamed. They may throw temper tantrums when they get upset or when you don’t give them what they want. This baby will like to explore and always looking for the next adventure or something to get into, so make sure to put them in lots of sports and have activities for them to channel their fiery energy. Your baby will love sports and is very competitive in anything he/she gets into and it may get them in some trouble sometimes as they mature. They will be very noisy or like to make a lot of noise/ or they love music. They will be very intelligent and intuitive, so you won’t be able to fool them or lie to them. They will like to be free and independent, so give them enough space to explore and learn new things on their own. They also have good emotional intelligence and they could even be an empath as they mature. Your baby could be a Aries, Leo, Sagittarius, Cancer, Pisces, Scorpio, or Aquarius

channeled messages | wears glasses, new house/apartment, angel numbers, Fire and Water, phone calls/messages, divine masculine, bossy, temperamental, ball of energy, solitude, ambivert, free-thinker, innovative, rebellious, stubborn, music lover, protective, momma-bear, red, brown, or blond hair, muscular/lean built, tall, proposal, gift from the universe, and planning mode 

pile 3 | 🤍

[TW] For some, I don’t feel like you will be happy about finding out about your pregnancy. You may wish to terminate the pregnancy, maybe due to financial reasonings or life circumstances may be too difficult and stressful for you to handle. You will likely go back and forth on whether you want to continue or terminate your pregnancy. For others, you could have had a miscarriage(s) in the past and this made you believe that you would never be able to get pregnant or sustain a full term pregnancy, and as a result, you could have given up hope, until the universe blessed you with this new miracle. Some of you could’ve had health issues that prevented you from getting pregnant, but by you changing your lifestyle and trusting in the divine, you will be able to have your miracle baby. You may find out that you are pregnant during a new moon.

You and your person may be separated or you could be separated by distance when they find out that you are expecting. This person will be extremely happy and excited about the news of your pregnancy. If this was a breakup/separation, your person will want to fix and heal the relationship to provide a loving and supportive environment for the child. If you two are separated by distance, you and this person will be reunited after a period of separation. They might travel back home right away to celebrate the news with you after a period of strife and struggles. 

Your family will also be happy about the news. They feel like you will be an amazing mother. They will be very supportive of you during your pregnancy. This may be a maternal figure that will be most excited about the news. So be prepared for lots of tears of joy. Your family will also want you and your person to reconcile to provide your child with a strong family unit.

You will be very protective of your baby during your pregnancy. You will be very conscious of everything that goes on around you. You will be very conscious of your health, making sure that you are healthy to sustain your pregnancy. You will be protecting your peace & well-being, as well as the well-being of your unborn child. You will be so in love with your child and you will do anything and everything to keep them protected and always surrounded in/by love. Your child will be very active, so they will move around a lot during your pregnancy. You will try your best to ensure that your pregnancy journey goes smoothly and peacefully.

Your baby will be so beautiful/handsome. They will also be very lucky and highly blessed by the universe, but they may still go through some ups and downs in life, but they will always manage to come back more resilient and wise every time. Your child will be very powerful and they may have strong psychic & intuitive abilities that were bestowed to them by the universe. They were meant to come into this life to heal generational trauma or karmic debts in this lifetime. They are meant to heal themselves & the collective in some way, so they could be natural-born healers. They will be highly protected and guided by the universe. They will be very creative and imaginative, so they will daydream a lot or always seem like they have their head in the clouds. Your child will love to dress up or play pretend/ they may even have an imaginary friend that they interact with and play with when they are lonely or bored. Your child may be misunderstood by others because they may feel like they’re different from their peers, so they will spend most their time building and creating their own fantasy to live in and explore because they feel so disconnected from the physical world. Your child will likely be shy and quiet for the most part. They are very sensitive to other people’s energy and they will need time alone throughout their life to recharge their energy. As your child matures, they will be very successful and confident in themselves. They will have the power to change and transform their own life and the lives of others. Your baby might be a Sagittarius, Scorpio, Taurus, Pisces, or have 12th house placements in their chart.

channeled messages | 444, 777, 666, Mexico, scholarships, struggles, medicine woman/man, financially secured, emotional unavailability, fashionista, 12th house, big decisions third eye, solar plexus, November, rewards and gifts from the universe, likes to sleep, rainbow baby, wanderer, new moon, and astral travel.

[randomfoggytiger]

1998: Gillian Anderson and Her Family

Gillian Anderson is strongly protective of her 4-year-old daughter, Piper. Says Anderson’s mother, Rosemary, “Motherhood has been enormously healthy for her. She’s more secure.”

Five years ago, a 24-year-old Gillian Anderson walked onto the set of The X-Files a virtual unknown....

No longer the sidekick, Gillian (pronounced “Jillian”) Anderson has watched her popularity propel her to the top tier of her profession, financially and artistically....

At the same time, she is struggling to maintain her balance, with a non-stop workload, frenzied fans and a 4-year-old daughter. “The only thing I care about,” she says, sitting in her trailer one evening during an X-Files shoot, “is that I’m perceived as a hard worker. This is what I love to do. This is my job.”

...“She certainly has established herself as an equal partner” on The X-Files, says her mother, Rosemary, a computer specialist who lives in Grand Rapids, Mich. “When she first started, I think, she was more frightened than she tried to show. But I also think her talents meshed with the writers’, and it’s becoming more of a vehicle for her. For a while there, she used to joke that she didn’t have much to say except, ‘What do you think it is, Mulder?’ ”

...Her daughter, Piper Maru, is a fixture on the X-Files set, and on this day is being carried around piggyback by the actress. The cherubic child, with her straight bangs and tiny rain boots, has been adopted by the cast and crew and often raids the prop truck for bloodied fake hands to wave about.

Anderson shares custody with her estranged husband, former X-Files assistant art director Clyde Klotz. The actress herself admitted she was difficult to be married to — it lasted less than three years — because of her strong will and fierce ambition. There is no doubt that Anderson is focused, and single-minded. On the set, she is highly professional and self-protective. While gossips would love to play up a feud between her and Duchovny, the truth is more complex. They seem to have a symbiotic, if somewhat strained, rapport, and they retreat to separate trailers during shooting breaks....

Born in Chicago to Rosemary and Edward Anderson, Gillian accompanied the family to Puerto Rico before settling in London, where her father studied film production. Her mother says she was adventurous and welcomed “new experiences.”

“One of my very favorite stories happened when we were in London,” Rosemary Anderson recalls. “It was her first day of nursery school. Her father was taking her down the stairs and she looked back up at me, saw my face and said, ‘Don’t cry, Mom.’ She was fine. I was not.”

After nine years, the Andersons returned to America and settled in Grand Rapids.

“By the time I was 11, I had been on 40-some planes,” the actress says, lighting another cigarette. “I remember my parents taking me to parties a lot. Running around, then falling asleep. Having my pajamas on and being carried to the car. … Some of my greatest memories are of them shoving me in the back of a VW Bug and sleeping on the way home.”

Now, her mother says, having a child has changed Anderson. It’s been “enormously healthy for her. I marvel that she can juggle that insane schedule. And she’s definitely become more secure, as an actress and as a parent. I think it makes her more serene.”

Anderson confirms that. “Your life lands on a plateau of seriousness all of a sudden, and things become more weighty. Since I’ve had Piper, I’ve been a much happier person. She is the most important thing. That’s what I think of first.”

...Doing the show, which requires 16-hour days 10 months of the year, has been grueling, and Anderson says her biggest fear is “insanity.” (She was previously quoted as calling her stint in Vancouver “a death sentence,” which did not go over well with Carter.)

She takes a sip of bottled water. “I think a big fear, too, is experiencing pain that will not end. I know pain, and I also know that it passes. But I guess when I’m in that, one of my fears is that it won’t end.”

Another real fear is being adored to death. Last summer, while shooting the X-Files feature film — reportedly a $60 million project — she was stalked by paparazzi trying to snap her with Piper at a playground. “In one area,” she says, “there were so many converging on me at once that the whole shopping area got together and talked to the sheriff’s department, and they were no longer allowed in that area. It makes me furious.”

Another fear is more insidious: self-destruction, as exemplified by her faux pas at the Emmys. Or her reluctance to fully embrace her current stardom. “I have to look at how I may have been involved in creating situations in my life,” she says. “How much can I not accept good things in my life? That I have to perhaps subconsciously create something that immediately shows me I’m not …”

Her voice trails off. She seems smaller, and more fragile, than her X-Files character.

A nagging sense, after all this time and hard work, of not deserving her current success?

She exhales a stream of cigarette smoke and lets a small smile cross her face. “Ultimately,” she sighs, “it probably is.”

-February 1998

[365momme]

Reclaiming Your Identity After Loss: Finding Yourself Again

Experiencing the loss of a loved one can feel like a seismic shift in your life. Along with the emotional turmoil that follows, many people find themselves grappling with a profound sense of identity loss. The person you were intertwined with the relationship you had, and now that connection feels severed. However, reclaiming your identity after loss is not only possible but also a vital step in…

[specialagentartemis]

Ask game: Ayda Mensah

for the character ask game

First impression

She seems sweet, and nice, and responsible. A sympathetic and reasonable human to contrast against Murderbot’s 8000 personal emotional issues.

Impression now

I love her as a nuanced portrayal of a truly good person and good leader. She’s become both foil to Murderbot, and kind of a… parallel isn’t the right word, but balance, maybe.

Also I really appreciate that she is a leader and a mother and yet her leadership doesn’t need to be defined or justified in terms of her motherhood. I see that a lot with Woman Leader Characters and it’s nice that she’s able to be both independently.

Favorite moment

“I know exactly what you are.” When she faces it down and talks it down on the gunship… the confidence, the trust, the empathy, the leadership. Ahh

Idea for a story

What! Was Mensah doing! During the bulk of System Collapse! I must know!!

Unpopular opinion

I think she should have marital problems more after All Of That. I think her marriage should be kinda rough now. :’’’)

Favorite relationship

Mensah and Murderbot’s friendship is So Good. She is its Favorite Human and it will kill and die for her and she mostly just wants it to live its best and happiest life for her instead and they have to mutually blackmail each other into self-care because they both care about each other so MUCH but are kinda garbage at caring for themselves! They make each other better! Even as the owner/guardian thing kind of casts a pall over that mutual care that they are struggling to define themselves around!

Favorite headcanon

Mensah came up into politics by being the president of her graduate program’s grad student organization and was the person actually getting any god damn thing done. Turns out she was good at that!

[roobylavender]

something tangential to the enforced motherhood post i reblogged but while dc's contention with this concept is pretty horrid and distasteful in general what i find worse is the fan reaction in batman circles, specifically with regards to talia and selina. on one hand, you have the very obvious projection of a racist and xenophobic trope onto talia where she is stripped of any and all personal agency and to the point her character can never be severed of motherhood or even worse only viewed as an abusive party within the concept. fans not only project their own experiences of abuse onto her despite these projections being contrary to her own ambitions and writing prior to her character assassination; they also, in the event they don't want her to be an abusive mother, decide to relegate her to a static concept of motherhood where she has no existence outside of raising damian and where there isn't even a possibility of toying with the idea that she may not have actually acquiesced to the concept of motherhood to begin with. i'm always so surprised by how little people seem to contextualize the life talia led as lex corp ceo with her potential role as a mother. how would she be able to live that kind of isolated, purpose-driven life where she could set every personal desire aside for the sake of her duty to the world if she was expected to parent a child first? this is a rare viewpoint i've never really seen expressed but one reason i find morrison's portrayal of bruce and talia as parents to be really ironic is bc i think the roles are nearly reversed. at that point in her life and with the slew of burdens and responsibilities on her shoulders i honestly think talia (regardless of what immense affection i'm sure she would have for her own child) would be the one who had trouble acclimatizing to her role as a parent, versus bruce who made it his intent for several years to parent various children and when he found out talia was pregnant impliedly committed to shielding that child (and her) from violence and a vigilante life at all costs. it's a narrative thread i really would have loved to see explored but on a practical level would likely be impossible to do not only bc of dc's handling of asian mothers and their racist degradation due to their juxtaposition against white fathers, but also bc of dc and dc fans' constricted view of motherhood to begin with. either you're a good mother or you're a bad mother. there's no room for the in-between nuance of possibly loving your child but not knowing how to balance that responsibility bc of what you view as important responsibilities you have to others

on the other hand, you have dc fans' engagement with selina's relationships with younger orphans and sex workers in her community. this is a really interesting one to dissect in light of ship wars specifically bc while i agree that there isn't any sense in having selina act as a mother-figure to bruce's children i also don't really agree with people's justification that she's not a "motherly" character. it's once again a very striking example of the restricted perception people have of motherhood or of behaviors commonly associated with that role, bc i don't think people who say this are really criticizing her ability to be a mother at all. what they're actually criticizing is her capacity to care. there's oddly all too many people who believe selina's anarchy or more self-serving nature is antithetical to any expression of compassion. so what you end up having is a phenomenon where one group of fans is eager to see her co-parent with bruce and another group of fans is eager to see her severed of any significant connections at all bc it somehow fits her "villainous" nature. and all-in-all, from both sides, her relationships with kids like holly and arizona are completely obscured. there's no room made to discuss how selina can possess deep empathy for young people whose experiences she identifies with and that she can care for them and even take them under her wing without necessarily wanting to adopt them, but that if she wanted, maybe she would adopt them. i honestly feel like that was the direction alan grant and doug moench were going in with arizona in the early 90s had mary jo duffy not abruptly excised arizona bc, like a lot of fans, she thought having significant emotional attachments was antithetical to the catwoman persona albeit there was no actual canon to back that notion on a behavioral level. i don't think selina has to be a mother, but i also don't think it's an infliction of stereotypical gender roles on her to imagine a scenario where she might adopt a stray, esp if that scenario occurs within a context where she is still independent and forging her own way of life and liberty. if anything, taking care of holly and arizona were some of the highest points of her narrative, bc they were a looking glass through which to explore selina's capacity for love and mercy, in spite of all of the trauma and abuse that she had to suffer at the hands of others

to me, the problem with dc's contention with motherhood is not so much that it's attached to these women at all, but that the definition of motherhood used is entirely framed with a heteronormative understanding of the family unit, despite the reams of potential to explore characters like talia and selina as independent figures acting outside of that traditional hierarchy

[pseudowho]

Genuine question, how do you manage to balance work and answering questions and writing and ur home life?

-someone struggling with time management as a student

First, please remember these things.

I am likely a good amount older than you, at 31.

I'm on maternity leave at the moment...but as in a previous Ask, I'd say that full time motherhood is arguably just as busy, if not busier, than working, and I do a very busy job (Midwifery).

I am high-functioning anxious, and it makes me wildly productive.

I have been a student and a mother and a full-time team leader simultaneously since the age of 24.

I have no down-time that I don't spend writing, or occasionally reading.

I write very fast-- for example, my drabbles generally take me 30 minutes, I give them a quick skim read for accuracy, and then post.

I have an awful lot of experience as a student studying more subjects than I strictly should have (think Hermione and the Time Turner), while working at the same time (during my University course, we worked 37.5 hours a week utterly unpaid, and had to do more than the standard amount of lectures and essays/dissertations as everyone else, too).

Then I did a lot of continued professional development, on top of being a full-time Midwife. Then I started coordinating full large staff teams.

Then, I have three small children and that requires military precision to take care of them all, and love them, and play with them to a high standard, alone.

The only reason I say all this? Because fuck, since I was 11/12 years old, my life has been time management.

The downside? I'm always stressed. Like, always. I always have something else to do, and I hold myself to insanely high standards, and honestly, I'll probably die of an aneurysm aged 50.

My recommendation? Focus on your studies and self-care first, and write if and when you want to.

Honestly. Please don't ruthlessly bully yourself like I do to myself. Yes, I am time efficient (I often write while I'm bopping a baby on my hip, and intermittently one handed chopping/stirring/cooking dinner), but it's a lot of experience and very demanding.

Sorry...this might be unhelpful.

You're doing brilliantly. You need downtime for your brain to function. Your hobby (if writing is your hobby) shouldn't feel like a job.

Love,

-- Haitch xxx

[tmnae]

Girl's Night Out @ Monolyth Hookah Lounge

Balancing the demands of motherhood left her yearning for a break, and the opportunity presented itself when her sister Alysia called.

Alysia, understanding the challenges of raising a young family, suggested a much-needed girls' night out. Tiana hesitated at first, torn between leaving her little ones for an evening and the desire to enjoy a rare moment of freedom. Eventually, she agreed, knowing that her husband was more than capable of holding down the fort... As the night unfolded, Tiana found herself immersed in the lively ambiance of the Monolyth Hookah Lounge. The sisters laughed, reminisced, and even tried a few exotic hookah flavors. The evening was a delightful escape, allowing Tiana to recharge and appreciate the importance of self-care.

Hookah Lounge by @shaymoo22

[gottacaptcha-em-all]

My Legacy Inheritor Jaime <3 (2nd Gen.)

Ambitious, Hot Headed, Self Assured, Maker, and family oriented (additional- Street Smart.)

Jaime is no stranger to a good challenge, she spent her teen and young adult life throwing it down in the mud, making a living in underground fighting, all while working a construction job to support herself. To put it simply Jamie’s beat Greg while drunk off of her cousin’s moonshine and felt like she could overcome anything else that came her way. Then she fell in love, she had a kid, and got married.

One day Jaime Helm woke up and realized that she had put her life and ambitions on pause. A few months later Jaime hesitatingly got a divorce, moved out, and became the most recent addition to Waterside Housing, the cheapest housing around (don’t ask why)(not that she really cares to, she takes miracles as they come). Her landlord might be a bit eccentric and her neighbors kind of an odd bunch, but she has a feeling they will grow on her (well, at least a some of them will.)

Nevertheless she’s in her adulthood in a completely unfamiliar place (she’s never left moonwood mill aside from her honeymoon), balancing motherhood, a waitressing gig, and classes (she decided to get her ged and go to college to get a degree in mechanics/engineering). How will Jaime face this new era of her life?

(With a new haircut obv.)