#balancing motherhood and self-care

[365momme]

The Art of Saying No: Protecting Your Time and Energy

As moms, we often wear many hats—mother, worker, caregiver, chef, chauffeur, teacher, friend, and the list goes on. With so much to juggle, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and stretched far too thin. The result? Anxiety, burnout, and a constant sense of being pulled in too many directions. While we may have heard the phrase “self-care” countless times, the truth is, it’s more than just…

[rfyimmo]

My Quarter-Life Crisis is trying to kill me. | MillennialMomManifesto

My kid was watching a nursery rhyme that said "Don't throw your junk in my back yard, my backyard’s full," and I froze, my mind spiraling until I sank into the floor and cried, Summer Walker style. Panic attack? Adult tantrum? How many times are my peers and women of my generation finding ourselves in positions like this?... And Why...?

The more I gain the confidence to speak with my peers about instances like these or the catalysts for such, I realize things like this are happening to most of us right now. Our unhappiness is mentally & physically showing itself in our faith, health, mind, bodies, actions and reactions.

Sociologists say "Mid-Life" by today's standards is between ages 35-75 🧐

What do you count as middle-aged? At almost 30, I feel like I used to think this was it, but now, I refuse to accept that. All my life society and media showed us mid-life crises were usually for 30 or 40-something year old men buying sports cars and trading in their wives for newer models, but today what does that look like? 

I'm calling it a quarter life crisis (and not mid-life crisis) because if the people in the Bible lived hundreds of years & there are still Centenarian Blue Zones on this modern day planet, I hope this is not the middle. I hoping we have so much more to go. Most people want to live longer and climb the proverbial ladder quicker - so that's where the crisis kicks in. My peers and I are trying not to be crushed under student debt, living costs that don't match the wage gaps, and dreams we don't know how to make come true, but still daily haunt us. Queue the panic about not being where we thought we would by now or how much we feel we should have gotten accomplished and comparison to our peers' highlight reels online.

Being super is tough: It's a constant battle of figuring out when to use your powers (for good or for evil), balancing your secret identity, maintaining your energy and constantly improving your powers or learning new ones.

Good Vs. Evil: Remember that panic from earlier? You know, the panic enacted by milestones you thought you would reach by now? Write down what you want, how you want to get it, and form a timeline to make it happen. Seeing your plan on paper can help ground you.

Secret Identity: Make the best of this time! Even if it doesn’t feel like it, you are supposed to be here in this moment. There is more than one way to navigate life, careers, etc. Why else would there be so many paths if people were not meant to be different and explore different options. Do what works for you! Your powers are different form the supe next to you, and there are still muggles and mortals with no powers at all. Queue the Gratitude & Mindfullness.

Maintaining Energy: They say life gets better with age, so think of yourself and where you were 1, 3, 5, and even 10 years ago! You would KILL to know, do, have the things you do now & you learn daily how to do this life thing a little bit better than yesterday. Consider this quarter or midlife crisis a pitstop for refocus, weather this transition with reflection and grace for yourself. Identify the wisdom you have and apply it to new areas. 

"The purpose of your life is to find your gift, the work of life is to develop it, and the meaning of life is to give it away."

As far as Powers: I leave you with this quote:

"Midlife is when the primary operating system of your life shifts from the ego to the soul. It's a period when people start to rearrange what gives meaning to themselves."

As a 'SuperMom' This is How I'm Running on Sustainable & Renewable Energy:

While the early 20s and late teens are living their "Rich 'Hot Girl' Era", I'm trying to find my way into "Wealthy Hot Mom Era" who Dabbles in "Mob Wife."

✨A few Podcast Recommendations:🌤️

From Broken To Branding: B Simone on Nice & Neat

Highlighted Quote: "I wasn't protected as a child so I think that's where a lot of my comedy comes from I walk on eggshells a lot trying to people please and I have a lack of boundaries because I want you to like me because I need validation from other people instead of getting it internally I wasn't I wasn't protected so I feel like I did a lot to make adults happy around me that were supposed to be there to protect me but really didn't make me feel comfortable as a child"

You've Been BLOCKING Your BLESSINGS! | Tabitha Brown

Tia Mowry: You’re Unhappy and You Don’t Know it - Learn to Leave the Comfort of Being Unhappy

✨Here's my Money & Positivity Playlist (to help you see the bright side:)🌤️

About the Author: Proud milso & toddler mom. Lover of art, creative writing & blogging 🎨 Believing in the power of efficiency & innovation 🌟 Passionate about helping small businesses thrive 🚀 Avid traveler & coffee enthusiast ☕️✈️

I love meeting new people and hearing their stories. Whether you're a fellow mom, a small business owner, or just someone looking for a bit of inspiration, let's connect and support each other on this incredible journey.

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[irene2025]

Always remind yourself 🌹

[theblackfemininesociety]

Mastering Time Management: A Love Letter to Our Besties 💝

Hey there, beautiful souls of the BFS! 💋

As your accountability partner, it’s important we express how important it is to master one game-changing skill: time management. As we juggle our 9-5s, motherhood, college assignments, and entrepreneurial dreams, managing our time effectively can feel like an uphill battle. But fear not, because we are going to show you how mastering these skills can help us avoid burnout and lead us to a more balanced, fulfilling life.

📝 The Power of a Planner

First things first: if you haven’t already, it’s time to invest in a cute physical planner! There’s something magical about putting pen to paper and mapping out your days. A planner not only helps you organize your tasks but also serves as a motivational tool. When you have a beautiful planner in your hands, it becomes easier to look forward to planning your week, setting goals, and checking things off your list.

Here are our top picks for planners that will inspire you to stay on track:

The Bookd store: Their planners are not just functional but also aesthetically pleasing, making planning a delightful experience.

Visit The Bookd store: HERE

Girls with Goals and Bankrolls: This planner empowers you to set your goals and achieve them, all while keeping your style in check.

Visit Girls with Goals ans Bankrolls: HERE

By writing down your tasks, you’re not just keeping track; you’re taking control of your life, one day at a time.

💤 Sleep is Your Superpower

Next up, let’s talk about the importance of sleep. We live in a society that often glorifies busyness, leading us to believe that sacrificing sleep is a badge of honor. But let’s get real: prioritizing sleep is crucial for our mental and physical health. Going to bed early allows your body to recharge, enhances your focus, and improves your mood.

When you wake up feeling refreshed, you’re more productive, creative, and ready to tackle whatever life throws your way. Plus, a good night’s sleep can help you approach challenges with a clear mind, reducing the chances of feeling overwhelmed.

😵‍💫 Avoiding Burnout

Now, let’s connect the dots: mastering time management helps us avoid burnout. When we learn to manage our time effectively, we create space for self-care, relaxation, and time with our loved ones. This is especially important for our 9-5 warriors, multitasking mothers, ambitious college students, and fierce entrepreneurs.

By prioritizing tasks, setting boundaries, and scheduling breaks, you’ll find that you can accomplish more without feeling drained. This balanced approach will not only improve your productivity but also allow you to enjoy the journey. After all, life is meant to be lived, not just endured!

Ladies, let’s commit to mastering time management together. Grab that planner, prioritize your sleep, and watch how these small changes can lead to significant transformations in your life.

💌Note: you are worthy of balance, joy, and fulfillment. By taking charge of your time, you’re not just avoiding burnout; you’re creating a life that reflects your dreams and values.

We have had an open discussion about avoiding burnout; view that post here

So, who’s ready to conquer their days with intention?

✨ HOW TO STAY ON TRACK?

Join our “Ladies Room” group chat: HERE !

Follow us on: Instagram • TikTok • Facebook

[donnapalude]

i think a lot of extreme readings on louis's character painting him either as the true abuser or as an helpless victim are failing to capture one of the main points of his story and of the portrayal of vampirism as a gift, which is the well-worn fictional theme of how terrible it can be to obtain everything you ever wanted.

throughout the interview louis is not just trying to exculpate himself or, on the other hand, just trying to come to terms with the abuse received. he, is of course, doing neither and both. he is trying to untangle the particular guilt created when harm descends on yourself and others from a situation that you did not directly create, but from which you partly benefitted. the fact that this guilt gets rielaborated for a long time through a pre-existing tendency for self-deception, does not mean that the harm received was not real or that the deception was only internal. it just signals that in order to move forward, louis needs to come to terms with the specific ways his own issues have informed the events in iwtv.

louis is a character profoundly scored by contrasting feelings of shame. even before meeting lestat, his role in society as an homosexual black man creates a set of conflicting instincts and expectations impossible to fulfill simultaneously. his feminine coding in the story is not arbitrary, but a logical consequence of the exclusion of blackness and homosexuality from the societal construct of masculinity. the standard societal role that men are expected to fulfill is of course one of dominance, assertiveness, and aggressiveness, translated in all spheres of life, be it professional, familial, or sexual. as a man, and in particular the head of his family, louis is supposed to fit into all of these expectations. however, as the rhetoric around the subjugation of black people relies on the (covert or overt) image of them as violent savages that need to be civilised, black-maleness is associated with an over-dramatisation of these characteristics (hypermasculinity), which ideologically requires the submission of black men in order to control the threat they pose. which means, as a black man trying to fit in white society, louis is also expected to react graciously to subduing, suppress anger, and appear non-threating (even sexually). on top of that, homosexuality entails an inherent humiliation into feminisation, as the masculine role of dominance does not exist in a vacuum, but is directly constructed upon the submission of women. and the breaking of gender roles for louis is compounded by some of his own personal traits, which lean towards nurturing, sensitivity and passivity. a passivity that, incidentally, is also informed by the tiredeness descending from his own parentified role in the family and by the many different necessities pulling him at the same time.

the picture painted here is extremely complicated. louis is not simply a man failing in his gender role. he lives in a society that assigns to him both masculine and feminine traits and punishes him when he cannot achieve them, while at the same time shaming him when he displays them. he feels shame over his sexual and violent urges, but also inadequate when he does not perform dominance. he feels ashamed of his desire for passivity and motherhood, but also inadequate when he cannot control his aversion to actual subjugation. he wants all of it: he wants to be powerful, respected, and strong, but he also wants to care and be cared for, to relax into the power of someone else, and to be able to avoid the responsibility of always being the one making decisions. he wants, in other words, to be a full human being. but the fragmentation of his identity in society will not allow it. and the cost of failing to maintain this delicate balance is not just societal reproach, there is a direct threat of violence hanging over him. this creates a paralysis in decision-making and identity-building that heavily colors louis's choices throughout his life.

part of how he deals with this in order to function, is by creating fictional roles for himself to inhabit and denying the aspects of himself he dislikes by projecting them on others. in s1, for instance, there is something to be said about louis taking all the masculine traits he feels ashamed of (the bloodlust, the desire for violence, the desire for (gay) sex) and assigning them to lestat, as well as blaming their growth in him to lestat's influence and vampirism. which is not an incorrect reading of the situation. the predatory drive he sees in lestat is not only an externalisation of his own issues. he is actually being hunted. and then of course he is actually being abused. moreover, vampirism does enhance his violent instincts. but all of this is also not a causal coincidence between reality and his own illusions. part of the reason louis loves lestat and is attracted to vampirism (because of him and through him), is precisely that they represent unashamed possession of what he hates in himself. he admires lestat for this and he also feels relief over his presence, as it enables him to experience those traits vicariously with reduced self-blaming by directing any condemnation externally. moreover, the stalking and power-imbalance and the forced turning create a fracture in his instincts. they provide him with seduction and power he did desire and they do that by permitting him to claim a passive role in them, so that he can avoid culpability. this is extremely confusing, as i don't think he is ever able to fully reconcile how much of what happened he wanted to happen.

from an external point of view, the audience can at least see he did not really want to be subjected to violence and he perceives a real danger of it from lestat, which then gets realised. as much as the masculine, but respectful business-owner was a persona he assumed to navigate that threat in society, the adaptable housewife is also a persona he assumes to navigate that threat with lestat. and these are unsparing calculations made to physically avoid harm by performing the characteristics better suited for it in any given moment. but the specific choices made to obtain this result are clearly tied to an exaggereted exploration of feminine and masculine roles that he would not have been able to fully inhabit without the excuse of a threat, due to the mentioned combination of shame and perceived deficiency. as shame begets pride, however, the assumption of these roles is also meant to claw back some margin of agency through the construction of a self-image that is not tied to victimhood. in other words, creating for himself the belief that through this exaggerations he is just voluntarily expressing his true self and not only reacting to the constrictions of external circumtances, allows him to bear his reality by believing it was born at least partly out of his own choices and that it helped him obtain at least some favourable outcomes.

there is a fascinating tension in him, in both wanting to deny his culpability and free-will in events in order to absolve himself and at the same time not feeling worthy of this absolution and perceiving its acceptance as a further sin. moreover, there is attraction towards powerlessness as a state devoid of the burden of decision-making, but also a rejection of it due to the guilt generated by feeling co-responsible in his own victimisation because of his passivity.

in a healthy, safe environment all of this could be reconciled. however, "marrying" lestat and becoming a vampire create an interesting conundrum, whereby he receives solutions that are technically able to magically fulfill all of his most secret, shameful, and contradictory desires (bloodlust, hunger, power, violence, sex, motherhood, submissivness), but through circumstances where his consent is severely impaired and with consequences that are harmful to both himself and others. so that he finds himself unable to fully forgive himself (he did want these things to happen, although not this way, and he does enjoy some aspects of them), but also unable to escape the situation. he occupies a state of victimhood that he perceives of his own making, which further impairs him from rejecting it, as staying in it is both denial and penance.

the ending of season 2 being centred on him accepting vampirism as a gift is a full circle. the liberation achieved after the interview is not, i think, a simple recognition that there was nothing he could have done to prevent events and that he deserves to live a full life as a consequence. there are many possible nuances to this and the situation with armand deserves a whole different conversation, but on a very basic level i think what matters most is the acceptance that he will never know, exactly, what alternative course of action could have been taken. he knows what he did not do: he did not have an active role in paul's suicide, his estrangement with his family, and claudia's murder. but his shame and tendency to self-sacrifice have created a situation of immobility that impedes him from taking full stock of the part his wants have played in events. and to fully rielaborate his role as a victim he will need, i think, more reflection on that. but in the meantime, what is sure is that protracting the same tendency by denying himself any enjoyment of his vampire life and placing all the blame for his turning and their relationship on lestat (though he is to blame for many many things), would just constitute a further attempt to avoid guilt by negating that those wants ever existed at all. the way forward is only one. to accept everything he wants and be purposeful with it now. to refuse the gift does not eliminate the terrible things that came with it, it just ignores them. maybe, by honoring it, he can honor them too. and try to avoid them from happening again.

[tarotbydelilah444]

✨🤰Details Of Your Future Pregnancy + Baby

hi guys, I’m back with another pac reading. This pac reading will be about your future baby + details about your future pregnancy. This reading is for entertainment purposes. I hope that you enjoy the reading and continue to keep following and sharing my posts, if you enjoy the content. Sending you love and light 🤍✨ - Delilah pile 1 | 🤎

Your pregnancy might be unexpected, so you were not expecting nor planning to have a baby when you find out. You could have been in denial or doubted that you were pregnant. You will definitely be shocked when you find out and try to hid this information from your person. For some, you could have strategically planned for this pregnancy without your partner knowing ( it may not have been in a malicious way), maybe you wanted a baby but your partner may not have been ready for one at the time.

Your partner will likely not be happy, but they won’t be mad about it either when they find out or when you tell them. They will likely confront you and you two will talk it out and kiss and make up in the end.

Your family will have very mixed feelings about the news of your pregnancy, but they will happy about the news for the most part. They will see this pregnancy as a blessing no matter the circumstances. They may see this baby/pregnancy as a miracle that will bring healing and reunite the family and bring balance into everyone’s life. Maybe you could have had issues with your family in the past, but this baby will put an end to any animosity/ issues within the family.

You will be glowing during your pregnancy. Motherhood will definitely look good on you and your baby will be healthy and growing. Everything will go well during your pregnancy journey. You may get spoiled a lot by others and your partner. You will be very relaxed and well taken care of. People will buy you gifts for the baby and you will start buying gifts and necessities for your baby before their birth. You will also be eating healthy and prioritizing you health to ensure a healthy pregnancy. Overall your pregnancy will be very peaceful and you will enjoy every moment and milestone during your pregnancy.

Your baby might be a girl. You and your partner might think it’s a boy, or you or your partner wanted a boy. Either way, you and your partner only care if the baby is healthy and whole. You could possibly have twins, so a boy and girl. Your baby/ies will be gifted, she/he/they will be able to hear and communicate with higher realms or spiritual beings. Your baby will be very aware and alert, they could also start talking or learning at a faster rate than most babies/toddlers. They will be very talkative as they age and self expression will be very important to this child. Your baby will be very intelligent as they mature. They will likely make good grades in school and they will like to learn a lot. They will be very loving, kind, caring, sensitive, independent, studious, curious, and dependable as they get older. Your baby will likely cry a lot, so you and your partner will not get much sleep for a while, but it will bring you and your partner much closer as you take in the joy of raising your child/children together. Your baby/babies could be a Gemini, Taurus, Capricorn, or Sagittarius.

channeled messages | straight textured hair, healing/self-love, healing family issues, surprised gender, spoiled-rotten, throat chakra, divine masculine, divine feminine, dark brown/black hair, brown eyes, black, or dark green eyes, angel baby, restless nights, blessed with beauty & grace, anxiety, and nightmares

pile 2 | 🧸

Your pregnancy will be exciting news that you have been waiting for, so a lot of you wanted to have a baby badly and you will be pretty excited and ready to share the news with your partner and others. You may announce your pregnancy to your partner in a creative way or in form of a present. You and your partner may make love after the news. You could have intuitively known that your were pregnant.

Your partner will be very happy about the news. They will literally get emotional once you tell them the news. This will only increase their love for you and they literally smother you with all forms of affection. They will be very supportive to you during the pregnancy.

Your family will be also happy and excited about the news. Someone may have already knew that you were pregnant, maybe they saw it in a dream or they could sensed it in general. Lots of calls and messages from your family and your person’s family to congratulate you and your partner. It will be a  welcoming and emotional experience for everyone.

You and your partner may move into a bigger home or will renovate your home to support your growing family. Your pregnancy will go very well and might go by very fast. You will feel very supported and loved through your pregnancy journey. Your family and friends might even plan you a baby shower and it will be quite a celebration. You will feel very stable, secured, and loved during your pregnancy. I also feel like you will be grateful for everything that you’ve been blessed with. You will likely like to be home a lot during your pregnancy with your partner preparing for your new arrival. You might have headaches or have a hard time sleeping while you are pregnant, so take it slow and try not to stress. You might have more dreams relating to your baby during your pregnancy.

Your baby may be a boy, but if you have a girl, she will likely have fire placements or masculine qualities, in regards to their personality. You and your partner are in it for a wild child. Your child will be a handful and likely a trouble maker. Your child will be very ferocious, brave, energetic, bratty, playful, and a ball of energy that refuses to be tamed. They may throw temper tantrums when they get upset or when you don’t give them what they want. This baby will like to explore and always looking for the next adventure or something to get into, so make sure to put them in lots of sports and have activities for them to channel their fiery energy. Your baby will love sports and is very competitive in anything he/she gets into and it may get them in some trouble sometimes as they mature. They will be very noisy or like to make a lot of noise/ or they love music. They will be very intelligent and intuitive, so you won’t be able to fool them or lie to them. They will like to be free and independent, so give them enough space to explore and learn new things on their own. They also have good emotional intelligence and they could even be an empath as they mature. Your baby could be a Aries, Leo, Sagittarius, Cancer, Pisces, Scorpio, or Aquarius

channeled messages | wears glasses, new house/apartment, angel numbers, Fire and Water, phone calls/messages, divine masculine, bossy, temperamental, ball of energy, solitude, ambivert, free-thinker, innovative, rebellious, stubborn, music lover, protective, momma-bear, red, brown, or blond hair, muscular/lean built, tall, proposal, gift from the universe, and planning mode 

pile 3 | 🤍

[TW] For some, I don’t feel like you will be happy about finding out about your pregnancy. You may wish to terminate the pregnancy, maybe due to financial reasonings or life circumstances may be too difficult and stressful for you to handle. You will likely go back and forth on whether you want to continue or terminate your pregnancy. For others, you could have had a miscarriage(s) in the past and this made you believe that you would never be able to get pregnant or sustain a full term pregnancy, and as a result, you could have given up hope, until the universe blessed you with this new miracle. Some of you could’ve had health issues that prevented you from getting pregnant, but by you changing your lifestyle and trusting in the divine, you will be able to have your miracle baby. You may find out that you are pregnant during a new moon.

You and your person may be separated or you could be separated by distance when they find out that you are expecting. This person will be extremely happy and excited about the news of your pregnancy. If this was a breakup/separation, your person will want to fix and heal the relationship to provide a loving and supportive environment for the child. If you two are separated by distance, you and this person will be reunited after a period of separation. They might travel back home right away to celebrate the news with you after a period of strife and struggles. 

Your family will also be happy about the news. They feel like you will be an amazing mother. They will be very supportive of you during your pregnancy. This may be a maternal figure that will be most excited about the news. So be prepared for lots of tears of joy. Your family will also want you and your person to reconcile to provide your child with a strong family unit.

You will be very protective of your baby during your pregnancy. You will be very conscious of everything that goes on around you. You will be very conscious of your health, making sure that you are healthy to sustain your pregnancy. You will be protecting your peace & well-being, as well as the well-being of your unborn child. You will be so in love with your child and you will do anything and everything to keep them protected and always surrounded in/by love. Your child will be very active, so they will move around a lot during your pregnancy. You will try your best to ensure that your pregnancy journey goes smoothly and peacefully.

Your baby will be so beautiful/handsome. They will also be very lucky and highly blessed by the universe, but they may still go through some ups and downs in life, but they will always manage to come back more resilient and wise every time. Your child will be very powerful and they may have strong psychic & intuitive abilities that were bestowed to them by the universe. They were meant to come into this life to heal generational trauma or karmic debts in this lifetime. They are meant to heal themselves & the collective in some way, so they could be natural-born healers. They will be highly protected and guided by the universe. They will be very creative and imaginative, so they will daydream a lot or always seem like they have their head in the clouds. Your child will love to dress up or play pretend/ they may even have an imaginary friend that they interact with and play with when they are lonely or bored. Your child may be misunderstood by others because they may feel like they’re different from their peers, so they will spend most their time building and creating their own fantasy to live in and explore because they feel so disconnected from the physical world. Your child will likely be shy and quiet for the most part. They are very sensitive to other people’s energy and they will need time alone throughout their life to recharge their energy. As your child matures, they will be very successful and confident in themselves. They will have the power to change and transform their own life and the lives of others. Your baby might be a Sagittarius, Scorpio, Taurus, Pisces, or have 12th house placements in their chart.

channeled messages | 444, 777, 666, Mexico, scholarships, struggles, medicine woman/man, financially secured, emotional unavailability, fashionista, 12th house, big decisions third eye, solar plexus, November, rewards and gifts from the universe, likes to sleep, rainbow baby, wanderer, new moon, and astral travel.

[randomfoggytiger]

1998: Gillian Anderson and Her Family

Gillian Anderson is strongly protective of her 4-year-old daughter, Piper. Says Anderson’s mother, Rosemary, “Motherhood has been enormously healthy for her. She’s more secure.”

Five years ago, a 24-year-old Gillian Anderson walked onto the set of The X-Files a virtual unknown....

No longer the sidekick, Gillian (pronounced “Jillian”) Anderson has watched her popularity propel her to the top tier of her profession, financially and artistically....

At the same time, she is struggling to maintain her balance, with a non-stop workload, frenzied fans and a 4-year-old daughter. “The only thing I care about,” she says, sitting in her trailer one evening during an X-Files shoot, “is that I’m perceived as a hard worker. This is what I love to do. This is my job.”

...“She certainly has established herself as an equal partner” on The X-Files, says her mother, Rosemary, a computer specialist who lives in Grand Rapids, Mich. “When she first started, I think, she was more frightened than she tried to show. But I also think her talents meshed with the writers’, and it’s becoming more of a vehicle for her. For a while there, she used to joke that she didn’t have much to say except, ‘What do you think it is, Mulder?’ ”

...Her daughter, Piper Maru, is a fixture on the X-Files set, and on this day is being carried around piggyback by the actress. The cherubic child, with her straight bangs and tiny rain boots, has been adopted by the cast and crew and often raids the prop truck for bloodied fake hands to wave about.

Anderson shares custody with her estranged husband, former X-Files assistant art director Clyde Klotz. The actress herself admitted she was difficult to be married to — it lasted less than three years — because of her strong will and fierce ambition. There is no doubt that Anderson is focused, and single-minded. On the set, she is highly professional and self-protective. While gossips would love to play up a feud between her and Duchovny, the truth is more complex. They seem to have a symbiotic, if somewhat strained, rapport, and they retreat to separate trailers during shooting breaks....

Born in Chicago to Rosemary and Edward Anderson, Gillian accompanied the family to Puerto Rico before settling in London, where her father studied film production. Her mother says she was adventurous and welcomed “new experiences.”

“One of my very favorite stories happened when we were in London,” Rosemary Anderson recalls. “It was her first day of nursery school. Her father was taking her down the stairs and she looked back up at me, saw my face and said, ‘Don’t cry, Mom.’ She was fine. I was not.”

After nine years, the Andersons returned to America and settled in Grand Rapids.

“By the time I was 11, I had been on 40-some planes,” the actress says, lighting another cigarette. “I remember my parents taking me to parties a lot. Running around, then falling asleep. Having my pajamas on and being carried to the car. … Some of my greatest memories are of them shoving me in the back of a VW Bug and sleeping on the way home.”

Now, her mother says, having a child has changed Anderson. It’s been “enormously healthy for her. I marvel that she can juggle that insane schedule. And she’s definitely become more secure, as an actress and as a parent. I think it makes her more serene.”

Anderson confirms that. “Your life lands on a plateau of seriousness all of a sudden, and things become more weighty. Since I’ve had Piper, I’ve been a much happier person. She is the most important thing. That’s what I think of first.”

...Doing the show, which requires 16-hour days 10 months of the year, has been grueling, and Anderson says her biggest fear is “insanity.” (She was previously quoted as calling her stint in Vancouver “a death sentence,” which did not go over well with Carter.)

She takes a sip of bottled water. “I think a big fear, too, is experiencing pain that will not end. I know pain, and I also know that it passes. But I guess when I’m in that, one of my fears is that it won’t end.”

Another real fear is being adored to death. Last summer, while shooting the X-Files feature film — reportedly a $60 million project — she was stalked by paparazzi trying to snap her with Piper at a playground. “In one area,” she says, “there were so many converging on me at once that the whole shopping area got together and talked to the sheriff’s department, and they were no longer allowed in that area. It makes me furious.”

Another fear is more insidious: self-destruction, as exemplified by her faux pas at the Emmys. Or her reluctance to fully embrace her current stardom. “I have to look at how I may have been involved in creating situations in my life,” she says. “How much can I not accept good things in my life? That I have to perhaps subconsciously create something that immediately shows me I’m not …”

Her voice trails off. She seems smaller, and more fragile, than her X-Files character.

A nagging sense, after all this time and hard work, of not deserving her current success?

She exhales a stream of cigarette smoke and lets a small smile cross her face. “Ultimately,” she sighs, “it probably is.”

-February 1998

[specialagentartemis]

Ask game: Ayda Mensah

for the character ask game

First impression

She seems sweet, and nice, and responsible. A sympathetic and reasonable human to contrast against Murderbot’s 8000 personal emotional issues.

Impression now

I love her as a nuanced portrayal of a truly good person and good leader. She’s become both foil to Murderbot, and kind of a… parallel isn’t the right word, but balance, maybe.

Also I really appreciate that she is a leader and a mother and yet her leadership doesn’t need to be defined or justified in terms of her motherhood. I see that a lot with Woman Leader Characters and it’s nice that she’s able to be both independently.

Favorite moment

“I know exactly what you are.” When she faces it down and talks it down on the gunship… the confidence, the trust, the empathy, the leadership. Ahh

Idea for a story

What! Was Mensah doing! During the bulk of System Collapse! I must know!!

Unpopular opinion

I think she should have marital problems more after All Of That. I think her marriage should be kinda rough now. :’’’)

Favorite relationship

Mensah and Murderbot’s friendship is So Good. She is its Favorite Human and it will kill and die for her and she mostly just wants it to live its best and happiest life for her instead and they have to mutually blackmail each other into self-care because they both care about each other so MUCH but are kinda garbage at caring for themselves! They make each other better! Even as the owner/guardian thing kind of casts a pall over that mutual care that they are struggling to define themselves around!

Favorite headcanon

Mensah came up into politics by being the president of her graduate program’s grad student organization and was the person actually getting any god damn thing done. Turns out she was good at that!

[roobylavender]

something tangential to the enforced motherhood post i reblogged but while dc's contention with this concept is pretty horrid and distasteful in general what i find worse is the fan reaction in batman circles, specifically with regards to talia and selina. on one hand, you have the very obvious projection of a racist and xenophobic trope onto talia where she is stripped of any and all personal agency and to the point her character can never be severed of motherhood or even worse only viewed as an abusive party within the concept. fans not only project their own experiences of abuse onto her despite these projections being contrary to her own ambitions and writing prior to her character assassination; they also, in the event they don't want her to be an abusive mother, decide to relegate her to a static concept of motherhood where she has no existence outside of raising damian and where there isn't even a possibility of toying with the idea that she may not have actually acquiesced to the concept of motherhood to begin with. i'm always so surprised by how little people seem to contextualize the life talia led as lex corp ceo with her potential role as a mother. how would she be able to live that kind of isolated, purpose-driven life where she could set every personal desire aside for the sake of her duty to the world if she was expected to parent a child first? this is a rare viewpoint i've never really seen expressed but one reason i find morrison's portrayal of bruce and talia as parents to be really ironic is bc i think the roles are nearly reversed. at that point in her life and with the slew of burdens and responsibilities on her shoulders i honestly think talia (regardless of what immense affection i'm sure she would have for her own child) would be the one who had trouble acclimatizing to her role as a parent, versus bruce who made it his intent for several years to parent various children and when he found out talia was pregnant impliedly committed to shielding that child (and her) from violence and a vigilante life at all costs. it's a narrative thread i really would have loved to see explored but on a practical level would likely be impossible to do not only bc of dc's handling of asian mothers and their racist degradation due to their juxtaposition against white fathers, but also bc of dc and dc fans' constricted view of motherhood to begin with. either you're a good mother or you're a bad mother. there's no room for the in-between nuance of possibly loving your child but not knowing how to balance that responsibility bc of what you view as important responsibilities you have to others

on the other hand, you have dc fans' engagement with selina's relationships with younger orphans and sex workers in her community. this is a really interesting one to dissect in light of ship wars specifically bc while i agree that there isn't any sense in having selina act as a mother-figure to bruce's children i also don't really agree with people's justification that she's not a "motherly" character. it's once again a very striking example of the restricted perception people have of motherhood or of behaviors commonly associated with that role, bc i don't think people who say this are really criticizing her ability to be a mother at all. what they're actually criticizing is her capacity to care. there's oddly all too many people who believe selina's anarchy or more self-serving nature is antithetical to any expression of compassion. so what you end up having is a phenomenon where one group of fans is eager to see her co-parent with bruce and another group of fans is eager to see her severed of any significant connections at all bc it somehow fits her "villainous" nature. and all-in-all, from both sides, her relationships with kids like holly and arizona are completely obscured. there's no room made to discuss how selina can possess deep empathy for young people whose experiences she identifies with and that she can care for them and even take them under her wing without necessarily wanting to adopt them, but that if she wanted, maybe she would adopt them. i honestly feel like that was the direction alan grant and doug moench were going in with arizona in the early 90s had mary jo duffy not abruptly excised arizona bc, like a lot of fans, she thought having significant emotional attachments was antithetical to the catwoman persona albeit there was no actual canon to back that notion on a behavioral level. i don't think selina has to be a mother, but i also don't think it's an infliction of stereotypical gender roles on her to imagine a scenario where she might adopt a stray, esp if that scenario occurs within a context where she is still independent and forging her own way of life and liberty. if anything, taking care of holly and arizona were some of the highest points of her narrative, bc they were a looking glass through which to explore selina's capacity for love and mercy, in spite of all of the trauma and abuse that she had to suffer at the hands of others

to me, the problem with dc's contention with motherhood is not so much that it's attached to these women at all, but that the definition of motherhood used is entirely framed with a heteronormative understanding of the family unit, despite the reams of potential to explore characters like talia and selina as independent figures acting outside of that traditional hierarchy

[pseudowho]

Genuine question, how do you manage to balance work and answering questions and writing and ur home life?

-someone struggling with time management as a student

First, please remember these things.

I am likely a good amount older than you, at 31.

I'm on maternity leave at the moment...but as in a previous Ask, I'd say that full time motherhood is arguably just as busy, if not busier, than working, and I do a very busy job (Midwifery).

I am high-functioning anxious, and it makes me wildly productive.

I have been a student and a mother and a full-time team leader simultaneously since the age of 24.

I have no down-time that I don't spend writing, or occasionally reading.

I write very fast-- for example, my drabbles generally take me 30 minutes, I give them a quick skim read for accuracy, and then post.

I have an awful lot of experience as a student studying more subjects than I strictly should have (think Hermione and the Time Turner), while working at the same time (during my University course, we worked 37.5 hours a week utterly unpaid, and had to do more than the standard amount of lectures and essays/dissertations as everyone else, too).

Then I did a lot of continued professional development, on top of being a full-time Midwife. Then I started coordinating full large staff teams.

Then, I have three small children and that requires military precision to take care of them all, and love them, and play with them to a high standard, alone.

The only reason I say all this? Because fuck, since I was 11/12 years old, my life has been time management.

The downside? I'm always stressed. Like, always. I always have something else to do, and I hold myself to insanely high standards, and honestly, I'll probably die of an aneurysm aged 50.

My recommendation? Focus on your studies and self-care first, and write if and when you want to.

Honestly. Please don't ruthlessly bully yourself like I do to myself. Yes, I am time efficient (I often write while I'm bopping a baby on my hip, and intermittently one handed chopping/stirring/cooking dinner), but it's a lot of experience and very demanding.

Sorry...this might be unhelpful.

You're doing brilliantly. You need downtime for your brain to function. Your hobby (if writing is your hobby) shouldn't feel like a job.

Love,

-- Haitch xxx

[tmnae]

Girl's Night Out @ Monolyth Hookah Lounge

Balancing the demands of motherhood left her yearning for a break, and the opportunity presented itself when her sister Alysia called.

Alysia, understanding the challenges of raising a young family, suggested a much-needed girls' night out. Tiana hesitated at first, torn between leaving her little ones for an evening and the desire to enjoy a rare moment of freedom. Eventually, she agreed, knowing that her husband was more than capable of holding down the fort... As the night unfolded, Tiana found herself immersed in the lively ambiance of the Monolyth Hookah Lounge. The sisters laughed, reminisced, and even tried a few exotic hookah flavors. The evening was a delightful escape, allowing Tiana to recharge and appreciate the importance of self-care.

Hookah Lounge by @shaymoo22

[haydenigmatic]

Sorry if this has already been asked before, but you mentioned that we’ll eventually have kids with the ROs. Which ones want kids, how would they be like during the pregnancy, and what would they be like as parents?

Sorry if this too many asks lol feel free to ignore them if you want. Either way I’m really looking forward to what comes next!

wow that's a lot to answer, but that's totally fine anon, it is actually a good question it made me think it trough and let's see:

With a little long post starting with the female RO's

ODETTE

Definitely wants children, especially with MC, as for how would she be while her pregnancy, well I picture her embracing the experience with grace. She'd radiate an air of serenity, cherishing each moment of the journey. Focusing on creating a harmonious and loving environment for the child. As a parent, she would prioritize instilling values of kindness, empathy, and integrity. Her interactions with her child would be marked by warmth and understanding, encouraging them to explore their passions while providing a secure and supportive foundation (I do picture her as a great mother really).

NESRIN

She would be content with having two or three children. While she might not openly express vulnerability, her actions would reflect a deep concern for the well-being of both herself and the child. She'd meticulously plan for every detail, from health routines to the nursery's design. As a parent, Nesrin would develop a profound dedication to her child's development. She would be firm yet nurturing, providing a structured and intellectually stimulating environment. Nesrin's love would manifest through thoughtful gestures and lessons, ensuring her child is well-prepared for the complexities of the world while experiencing the warmth of a loving home.

JASIRA

She also wants a few, having to grow up in a big family herself, she definitely not want to be a baby machine as her mother. During pregnancy, Jasira's strong-willed and adventurous nature would persist, although tempered by a newfound sense of protectiveness. She might face the challenges of pregnancy with resilience, continuing to pursue her activities with careful consideration for the well-being of both herself and the baby. As a parent, Jasira would instil a spirit of independence and fearlessness in her child. While being firm and setting clear expectations, she would also encourage curiosity and self-expression. Her parenting style would involve teaching practical skills like archery and swordplay, fostering a sense of discipline, and imbuing a deep appreciation for the importance of justice and integrity. She would become a nurturing and empowering presence in her child's life.

VERENA

Once believing she did not want children, would find herself navigating this new chapter with a mix of vulnerability and determination. The experience would momentarily soften her sharp edges as she grapples with the physical and emotional changes. However, her strategic mind would soon kick in, and she'd approach motherhood with the same calculated precision she employs in politics. As a parent, she'd be firm but fair, fostering a sense of discipline and ambition in their child. Despite her initial reservations, motherhood would allow her nurturing side to emerge.

SORIN

She doesn't want too many children, but would love to become a mother. During pregnancy she would be fiercely protective and nurturing. She'd approach it with practicality, ensuring a balance between her adventurous lifestyle and the needs of the child. As a parent, Sorin would instil resilience, resourcefulness, and a love for exploration in her child. She'd go to great lengths to protect her child, using her skills and instincts to create a secure and unique upbringing. Her parenting style would emphasize self-reliance, adaptability, and an appreciation for life's diverse experiences.

DAMON

He's protective, ensuring the MC's comfort and happiness, while also showering MC with thoughtful gestures and gifts. Damon spares no expense in pampering and spoiling his child. He indulges their every want, from extravagant gifts to special treats. He would melt into a doting parent, readily bending to fulfil the child's desires. Being ready to father more children with MC, he does want a big family.

HANNIEL

During the pregnancy, Hanniel, though initially hesitant, would become a pillar of support for MC (he did not want children mostly due to social status concerns). His protective instincts kick in, and he ensures her well-being with unwavering care. Despite his initial reservations about fatherhood, he gradually embraces the idea, finding joy in anticipating the arrival of their child. As a parent, he is both loving and principled. He instils a sense of honour and justice in their child, sharing his values through bedtime stories and life lessons.

AURELIA/N

Aurelia/N does want to have a big family or as many as MC wants. Her/his protective instincts heighten. While maintaining her/his composed exterior, s/he becomes more attentive,(either for her or a fem mc) ensuring the MC's comfort and well-being. They may express their love through subtle acts of care, like preparing soothing teas or reading stories to the unborn child. In their own unique way, imparts life lessons, blending their practicality gained from her travels. their love is steadfast, expressed through a combination of gentle guidance and a commitment to being a present and supportive parent (something their father was not).

DORIA/N

Initially frustrated by the news of impending parenthood, is overwhelmed by fear rooted in past traumas (as they never thought themselves as a parent). The prospect of becoming a parent triggers memories of their own difficult childhood and the loss of their mother during childbirth. This fear, however, transforms into a silent determination as the pregnancy progresses.

As a parent, Doria/Dorian approaches the role with a unique blend of protective instincts and guarded affection. Their parenting style is influenced by a desire to break the cycle of familial strife. Their tough exterior remains intact, but their child becomes the soft spot in their heart. they teach the child to navigate the world with a guarded yet perceptive outlook.

[mysteriouslytransparentwitch]

34 years in November, finally I publish now, I opened the comment space

I start writing my post on August 8, 2023, I will be back to work soon, I hope. These 18 months have been very difficult in terms of health, my last hospitalization between February and May clearly opened my eyes to my life.

This is the first time that I am excited to celebrate my 34th birthday with dignity on November 3rd. To finally close this chapter of my life (I'm not healed yet)

I realized a lot of things:

life is short

life is worth living

money is a flute of energy

many people come to open up to the world and they are ready to welcome you in their arms too.

social life is not easy

we can really create little moments of happiness (a bouquet of flowers per month)

I really like to surround myself with artisanal products

I can continue like this, I registered on a friendly dating application and I really liked my experiences, I hope to balance my professional and social life with my return to work. The week of August 8, I have a girl meeting then I proposed a meeting at the Musée d'Orsay which remains one of my favorite museums. My goal is to open myself fully to the world.

For some time now, I've been trying to make choice prints on a plus theme in keeping with my current life.

I work on my feminine energy, because I have a masculine energy, I have always worked with this part and I was raised in this energy, my mother took care of 4 children on her own. I realized that I was really too anchored in this energy and I want to find a balance between my feminine and masculine part.

I have regained a taste for paying attention to my look, putting on make-up…. doing certain things in conscience. I realize it's more than that.

I am also aware that we are in survival mode for 90% of the world's population because societal life is very difficult.

Just tired of fighting, I want to have fun and stop sacrificing everything.

about my love life, I try to be optimistic and stay open but I am aware that time also passes. I hope to find the person, however I am open to the idea of starting my own family because yes before I thought it was selfish to do that because the child deserves better especially since I lived without a father. But motherhood is still there even if some aspects scare me. I'm open to all options. I leave myself until the age of 36, I remain open to the proposals of life.

on my professional life, I leave myself until the end of May (if the company does not fire me before lol) to put my finances in order, I continue to work on my self-employed project which is progressing well, I am happy

[tarzantips]

Navigating Pregnancy Fears: Expert Tips for a Confident Mom-to-Be

Pregnancy is a beautiful journey, but it can also bring a whirlwind of emotions, including fear and anxiety. From concerns about your health and the baby's development to fears about labor and delivery, it's normal to feel overwhelmed.

Here are some expert tips to help you navigate these fears and embrace your journey with confidence,

1. Educate Yourself

Knowledge is power. Understanding what to expect at each stage of pregnancy can alleviate many fears. Attend prenatal classes, read reputable books, and consult with your healthcare provider to gain a clear understanding of what’s normal and what’s not.

2. Communicate Openly

Don’t hesitate to share your concerns with your partner, friends, or family. Open communication can provide emotional support and practical advice. Joining a pregnancy support group can also connect you with other expectant mothers who may share similar fears.

3. Practice Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques

Stress and anxiety can be managed through mindfulness and relaxation practices. Techniques such as deep breathing exercises, meditation, and prenatal yoga can help calm your mind and body, reducing overall stress levels.

4. Stay Active and Healthy

Regular exercise and a balanced diet are crucial during pregnancy. Physical activity can improve your mood, boost energy levels, and promote better sleep. Consult your doctor to determine safe exercises and nutritional guidelines for your pregnancy.

5. Plan Ahead

Prepare for the unknown by creating a birth plan and discussing it with your healthcare provider. Knowing your options for labor and delivery can make the experience less intimidating. Additionally, organizing your home and baby’s nursery in advance can provide a sense of control.

6. Seek Professional Help if Needed

If your fears become overwhelming or lead to severe anxiety, consider speaking with a mental health professional who specializes in perinatal care. Therapy or counseling can provide valuable tools to manage anxiety and improve your overall well-being.

7. Focus on the Present

Instead of worrying about future scenarios, concentrate on enjoying the present moment. Celebrate each milestone and savor the positive aspects of pregnancy. This shift in focus can help reduce anxiety and enhance your overall experience.

8. Create a Supportive Network

Surround yourself with a supportive network of friends, family, and healthcare providers. Their encouragement and understanding can make a significant difference in managing fears and building confidence.

9. Embrace Self-Care

Taking time for yourself is essential. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether it's reading, taking a bath, or enjoying a hobby, self-care can recharge your emotional and mental well-being.

10. Trust Your Body

Your body is designed to handle pregnancy and childbirth. Trust in its strength and resilience. Rely on the expertise of your healthcare provider and remember that many women have successfully navigated similar fears.

Pregnancy is a unique and transformative experience. By addressing your fears proactively and embracing these expert tips, you can approach motherhood with greater confidence and joy. Remember, every pregnancy journey is different, so find what works best for you and your baby.

more >>>

[creacherino]

Hi :), I saw you are doing free readings, can I request about: Why I am so mysterious?

Thank you and have a good day ☘️🪻

Hi! This is your spread.

1. What is causing you to be this way? Four of Swords

You need to find your center. You have to be steady. It’s time to take a much needed break and rest. You need to recover from wounds, whether they be emotional, mental, or physical. You are holding yourself back.

2. What should you do? Justice

Trust yourself and your intellect. Be fair to yourself and others. Hold yourself to your morals. Analyze and evaluate yourself. Find balance.

3. What shouldn’t you do? King of Swords

You must remain objective. Don’t let yourself get too caught up in your emotions. Don’t lose your focus. Don’t lose your ethics.

4. What does the future hold? The Empress

Creativity and passion. Creation that is born out of love. Be generous with your self care and your care of others. Motherhood, fertility and birth (whether literal or metaphorical).

I hope this was a positive reading for you! 💜

[sipsofsecrets]

ˏˋ 𓂃 ( ana de armas. cis-female. she/her. ). meet amara morales cortez, a 36 year old, who has been in cloyne for 11 years. they are a teacher at clone high school, known for being graceful even in stressful situations and their home-wrecker reputation. they are often heard humming along to young and beautiful by lana del rey. residents would describe them as the mayor's mistress. ( klein, 29, she/her, est )

A U R A

soft rustling of silk as she walks through her home, a mixture of grace and purpose in every step. shadows cast by flickering candlelight during late-night reading sessions, a glass of red wine untouched beside her. scent of aged wood and books in her study, a space where she finds peace amidst the chaos of her life. quiet moments after a playful argument with her husband, his words still lingering in the air as she considers what it would mean to give up teaching. sound of her children playing in the background, their laughter a reminder of the family she’s built, though she longs for more. sharp click of her heels as she leaves the school after a long day, knowing her husband would prefer her home, but feeling too attached to the life she’s created for herself. late nights curled up with a book, one hand absentmindedly resting on her stomach, thinking about the possibility of another child. classical music echoing through the house while she cooks dinner for her family, an elegant façade hiding the fear underneath.

P R O F I L E

birth name: ana maria rojas, amara morales (given when she entered witness protection), amara morales cortez (she took the last name cortez after marrying victor).

nicknames: the first lady (a nickname among locals, acknowledging her position as the mayor’s wife), the mayor's mistress.

date of birth: april 30, 1988.

age: 36.

height: 5'6" / 167 cm.

gender: cis-female.

pronouns: she/her.

sexuality: bisexual heterosexual.

relationship status: married to victor cortez (the mayor).

birthplace: havana, cuba.

currently resides: cloyne, ontario.

husband: victor cortez, the mayor of cloyne.

children: 7-year-old twins (mateo and clara cortez).

step-children: emilio (21 y/o) and julian cortez (22 y/o) from victor’s previous marriage.

religion: catholic (non-practicing, more out of habit than faith)

education: undergraduate degree (history+ english literature), teaching certificate

languages: spanish (native), english (fluent), french (basic).

occupation: history + social studies teacher at cloyne high school.

A T T R I B U T E S

preferred hand: left-handed

blood type: O+ (universal donor, think the giving tree)

allergies: none

physical health: maintains an active lifestyle, balancing the demands of motherhood with self-care. practices yoga when she has time, but isn’t rigid about it.

mental health: occasional bouts of paranoia. deals with suppressed fear of her past catching up to her (especially regarding the safety of her family). compartmentalizes emotions and stress to maintain control. haunted by memories of her early life causes her sleepless nights or vivid flashbacks

P E R S O N A

taurus sun. intj. melancholic. 6w5 (the loyalist).

graceful (maintains her composure in every situation). intelligent (planning ahead to stay in control of her life). compassionate (deeply cares for her husband, children, students, and those closest to her). self-controlled (rarely acts impulsively).

secretive (she guards her past carefully). mistrustful (years of hiding have made her wary of others). perfectionist (she strives for flawlessness in everything she does, mistakes could unravel her life).

R E L A T I O N S

her husband: amara calls victor "mi sol," a term of endearment that signifies the steady, grounding force he is in her life. despite their deep connection, there is ongoing tension between them.

children: her relationship with her twins is loving, and she is a dedicated mother. however, her relationship with her step-sons is more strained. they remain wary of her, knowing she was once their father’s mistress. while she tries to play the role of a nurturing stepmother, there is a distance between them, and amara senses they don’t fully trust her.

students: as a teacher at cloyne high school, amara is respected for her compassion. she’s known for being firm but fair.

reputation in cloyne: amara is known for her composure, even in the face of scandal. despite being the mayor’s wife, many in town still refer to her as “the mayor’s mistress,” a label that follows her due to the circumstances of her marriage. she’s both admired for her elegance and whispered about for her past. her reputation as a home-wrecker hasn’t faded over the years, but she carries herself with dignity, never reacting to the gossip.

public persona: amara is the epitome of grace. she dresses impeccably and speaks carefully, always conscious of how she is perceived. while the town still gossips about her past, she never gives them fuel for new rumours. she attends town events as the mayor’s wife, playing the part of the supportive spouse.

H A B I T S

sips her coffee slowly, savouring it.

never rushing through mornings.

organizes her desk meticulously.

taps her nails against her glass or on her desk when she is deep in thought.

L I K E S

vintage perfume (prefers the scent of jasmine, sandalwood, and leather—her signature fragrance).

books (historical fiction and mystery novels and erotica).

fine cigars (especially if they're cuban).

rare, vintage jewelry

away from her children and husband's eyes: bourbon (prefers it neat, a reminder of her power and control).

hunting (another sport she does not like to indulge in around her children nor her husband).

D I S L I K E S

discussing her past or her family in cuba.

invasion of her personal space.

unannounced visits.

public scrutiny.

messes. especially bloody messes.

A P P E A R A N C E

so strikingly beautiful that her presence that commands attention, her features are soft but strong at the same time. light eyes, full lips, dark hair. her body is lean and tone, she walks with the grace of royalty.

S T Y L E

often wears tailored dresses, fitted blouses and slacks. at home she favours soft, comfortable fabrics like cashmere sweaters and silk robes but her wardrobe has always been stocked with elegance.

T A T T O O S

a small delicate sun tattoo on her ribcage just beneath her heart (mi sol). a delicate constellation on the inside of her right wrist with two stars representing her twins-- below each star are their birthdates in roman numerals.

S T O R I E S U N T O L D

1988: ana maria rojas was born in havana, cuba. her father was deeply involved in organized crime. despite this, he loved his children deeply, and when his criminal ties put them at risk, he made a deal with the united states government to become an informant.

1999: by age of 11, ana maria witnessed several heinous crimes due to her father’s criminal involvement. these experiences deeply affected her, making her develop a strong aversion to messes and blood. as the danger grew, her father arranged for her to be smuggled out of cuba to miami for her safety. ana had to leave her brother behind, who was only 9 years old because he had already been pulled into the gang, which has haunted her ever since.

2003: by the time she turned 15, ana maria was placed in the witness protection program and moved to canada, under the new identity of amara morales. the increased risk to her life prompted this move.

2003 - 2012: during her years in vancouver, canada amara lived with foster parents who gave her stability, but she always carried the trauma of leaving her brother behind in cuba. she feared that the criminal organizations her father betrayed might find her, so she stayed vigilant and distant from others. the memories of the crimes she witnessed in cuba continued to shape her, causing her deep discomfort with anything bloody or messy.

2012: after the mysterious death of her foster parents, amara felt the need to leave vancouver and start fresh. she relocated to cloyne, ontario, seeking a quiet, hidden life.

2013: amara met victor cortez, the mayor of cloyne, at a time when she was desperate for stability and security. she viewed him as her safety net in a world that constantly felt unstable. that is how their scandal began. though the town gossiped and even labeled her as “the mayor’s mistress," she clung to victor, seeing him as the foundation to the new life she had always longed for.

2017: amara and victor married, and she became amara morales cortez. they had twins, and amara found some peace in motherhood. perhaps this is why she longs for another child. she wants the peace and distraction of a baby's cry. or maybe it's because the rumours the town spreads have a deeper effect on her psyche than she cares to show.

present: amara lives a life of constant vigilance, even though she outwardly seems to have it all—a family, a husband, and a career. she is haunted by memories of her brother and the crimes she witnessed, forever torn between the life she’s built and the past she’s tried to bury.

W A N T E D C O N N E C T I O N S

THE JOURNALIST – there’s a local reporter who has always been suspicious of amara's past. they’ve been quietly investigating her for years, convinced there’s more to her than just being the mayor’s wife.

THE EX-LOVER - before marrying victor, amara had a brief but intense relationship with someone in cloyne. though the affair ended, there’s still a flicker of unresolved tension whenever they see each other.

THE STEP-SON - one of victor’s adult sons still harbours deep resentment toward amara for breaking up his parents’ marriage. their interactions are cold and hostile, but there’s an underlying tension of unresolved conflict between them.

THE BEST FRIEND – amara’s closest confidante in cloyne is a fellow teacher at the high school. they bond over their shared love of history and their ability to keep each other’s secrets, providing emotional support when needed.

THE FORMER STUDENT - amara remains close to a former student who has grown up and is now friends with her step-sons. despite their friendship with her step-sons, this person maintains a special bond with amara, often turning to her for advice and guidance.

THE PARENT FRIEND – one of the other moms from her children’s school has become a casual friend. they bond over school events and playdates, providing amara with a light, friendly connection outside her family drama.