#baby i love u lyric
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[Single] Sejeong (김세정) - Baby I Love U
김세정 – Baby I Love URelease Date: 2021.07.23Genre: BalladLanguage: Korean Track List:01. Baby I Love UDownload .lrc file here:Link 1
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#babyiloveu#김세정#세정#kimsejeong#sejeong#baby i love u#baby i love u kim sejeong#baby i love u kim sejeong lyrics#baby i love u lyric#baby i love u lyric kim sejeong#baby i love u lyrics#baby i love u lyrics kim sejeong#baby i love you kim sejeong#baby i love you lyrics kim sejeong#kim sejeong baby i love u#kim sejeong baby i love u lyrics#kim sejeong baby i love you lyrics#sejeong baby i love u lyrics
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people that are obsessed with jurdan are so weird and need to get a life 🙄🙄 (it's me. I'm people.)
#what can i say#ive got issues i cant help it baby#(random lyric that popped in my head we love u olivia)#olivia rodrigo#books#bookish#booklr#the cruel prince#cardan greenbriar#tfota#jude duarte#cardan#the folk of the air#jude#jurdan#judecardan#jude x cardan#cardan x jude#tfota series#the folk of air#the wicked king#the queen of nothing#the stolen heir#the prisoners throne#holly black#booktok#bookblr#book blog#fantasy#romance
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Maybe if I told you the right words Ooh, at the right time, you'd be mine
FELLOW TRAVELERS VALENTINE'S DAY MONTH Week 1: FAVORITES - favorite song that makes you think of them ↳ Tracy Chapman - Baby Can I Hold You + FELLOW TRAVELERS 1.08 ‘Make It Easy’
#fellow travelers#ft valentine’s day#“how do I love thee‚ let me count the weeks…”#fellowtravelersedit#hawkins fuller#tim laughlin#tim x hawk#hawk x tim#valentines day#fandom event#1x08#tracy chapman#baby can i hold you#lyrics#old men in love#my edits#i had fun playing with text so ended up doing a thing... (pls ignore that this is fully a week late) 😁🫶#the fact that so many tracy songs fit them so well??!! (i've been listening to all her albums on repeat for several many days)#it hurt to spell favourites without the “u” 🥲
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i made this sansa + my favorite lyric from in the heights & promptly passed out for sleep
#i had a few once on this island ones u fortunately i refuse to use the mhysa scene#spartacus did it non problematically but also it feels problematic of ME to put the lyrics#‘and she fills us with the power and the wonder of her love’#over that crowd surfing scene. again. spartacus did this without looking Like That#with a cast that was like Largely made up of maori & black actors seeing a white guy as a savior.#i’m gonna be honest i think d&d are straight up bad at this aksksj#getting on my soap box#anyways claudia & usnavi’s relationship is my favorite this line makes me sob like a little baby#i bestow it with love on one of my favorites aksjd
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GUESS WHAT MFSSS
#im BACK#and also i wrote 14k words.#jackieshauna: fever dreams#wanted to post this on here too but few of the chaps r too long so. its not here ig#i put this on ao3 yesterday and ppl have alr seen it tf#AYNWAYS its called fever dreams and its a continuation of my edit series in spirit#as in. stuff based on flower face albums#chronologically#nxt one r animatics n baby teeth once i figure out how the hell to do that.#mitos incredible life#mine art tag#jackieshauna#yellowjackets#uhhhhhhhh#yeah much has been going on but im back now bascially#slay#ABT THE FIC again its based off the songs so if smth doesnt make sense read the lyrics. if its still weird then thats just me#love u flower face!!! woooo#also if its very strnge to read just pretend its a long poem. if u have quesions just ask i had thoughts abt most of that and i will answer
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Favorite This Place Will Become Your Tomb song?
Oof ramble alert here we go:
Descending. Descending will always and forever be my most precious baby girl from Tomb and I will defend her to the ends of the earth. It's a bit of an acquired taste (I didn't like it until after a few listens) and people don't really get it, but I genuinely think that it's one of the best songs on the whole discography. It's dark, sexy, ominous, off-putting, and utterly enchanting in the best ways possible. It makes my skin-crawl but also I want to go crawling on the ground too looooool
It's a good overview into the dynamic between Vessel and Sleep, the characterization of both, and maybe some insight into Vessel's experience with romance up to that point. Like, idk, it just summarizes the whole thing really effectively imo. You've got this toxic relationship where both parties know it's toxic. One keeps coming back despite the hurt and potential degradation they'll face because of it, and the other knows this and likes it.
The thing that really does it for me is the vocal style. I think there's a bit of a difference between music that's consumable vs music that communicates, and Descending def falls into the latter category for me. As in, it wasn't made to sound "good" or "pretty" in the way that most people would consider something "good" or "pretty" sounding. The choices made were the most effective in communicating the story Vessel wants to share (imo), even if some of those choices sound kinda "weird"
Setting up a dialogue of sorts using different vocal styles is such an interesting creative choice! I've never seen a song do something like that before, so the uniqueness alone captured my heart. Like you've got Sleep as this pretty high-pitched tone, and Vessel representing himself through a super uncanny, nasally, just kinda *weird* deeper register. And!!!! The thing I REALLY love is the pitched-up pre chorus!!!!!!!!!!!! Like the difference between Sleep sort of "telling it like it is" in a high tone to manipulate (ex. "you come crawling back to me" — like yup, isn't that proof of how much you need this?) vs Sleep just bullshitting (ex. "I've been left no choice, can't you see that?") in a *faked* high tone to manipulate is SO cool to me!!!!
I still want to do some more deep diving to really solidify my analysis, but this is my rough interpretation as of right now. Anyways stream Descending because she is so beautiful and gorgeous to me, and she's probably the most underrated song on the whole discography
#waaaah ty for this i am just so in love with Vessel's creative process#please please please anyone w/ descending theories share them w me please i am begging u#and that's not even getting into broader lore or connections to other songs or the instrumental or lyrical imagery or#elkk.lore#<- new tag baby lets go!#askkiel#fruitsandcheese.ask#sleep token#sleep token lore#tpwbyt
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you and me are shining
in our separate places
i see your light up above
and i always like the taste
#love notes#banks#anything 4 u#ignore weird lyrics as per usual#baby i'd do anything for you#i'd walk 500 miles#just to collapse at your feet and tell you i love you#and if i had one last breath to breathe#i'd give you the air from my lungs
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AY!!!!!!!!!!
Their foreplay is playing great football, that's why their romanticism suffers after terrible losses
#why does allens head vibrate 😭😭😭😭#diggs: JOSH!!!!#if u dont START LOOKING BETTER#my BROTHER is going to KILL YOU#josh: *nods vigorously and the water in his skull starts to shake like jello*#why did stef compliment the play like how i compliment the dubious scribbles my nephews show me proudly#'this is a GREAT drawing <3!! a GREAT friggin drawing!!!'#im srry im distracted by joshs head nodding now#IT'S SO TURBO????#diggs: put the Dagger in em.#(my enemy sleeps soundly and with a knife)#josh: DAGGER IN EM--#so cute how diggs tells him not the force it#like pls baby dont think im being pressuring rn im just passionate#but allen understands. he always understands stef. stef is his favorite song#he fumbles some words so he just sings the lyrics a little late but always Always loaded with So much love#no one sings it better than him except for stef himself and when stef does#josh will always be the drum of his (heart)beat#diggs giving out positive affirmation and then leaving 😭 hes such a treat. such a doll#THATS ALL HE CAME TO DO!! it was IMPORTANT for him to do so !!!! STEF NEEDED TO SAY IT AND JOSH NEEDED TO HEAR IT!!!!#pov i have to call my qb a good boy everytime he throws the ball and it's not an interception#diggs/allen
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‘nothing is cooler’ plsss
HIIIII thanks for askin!<3
soooo because people enjoyed if there was more, i started poking at the big 'ol draft it came from again.. its a punk!bucky x jock!sam au with Princes of the School and Only Gays stevetony, where i continue my bad habit of being overly invested in all the side characters. its all cringey angst with a happy ending.
a snippet for you:
“People talk too much,” Sam hisses back. “I don't want to end the school year with people whispering shit about me.” “Steve and Tony seem fine?” Bucky tries, because, what else can he say? No one will talk? Neither of them are that stupid. Tony and Steve are a constant topic of conversation, but they do seem okay. Happy, even. It’s because they have each other, Bucky thinks, they came out together, and they’re stronger together. He could have that with Sam. They could be more than just, whatever this is they’re doing. That is, if Sam even likes him like that, if the way he looks at him means anything. Bucky thinks it does. The way Sam makes him feel, even when they’re not pressed up against each other in the dark, might be worth anything they’re thrown up against. “We’re not them, okay? I –” Sam answers, and there's something in his voice that he’s heard a hundred times by now, a warning Bucky was ignoring. “Just say you don’t like me,” Bucky interrupts, not meaning to raise his voice, but not really able to stop lower it once he has, “just be honest with me for once. I don’t need you to lecture me about how I don’t fit into your neat little life plan, alright? If you don’t like me, you don’t like me. Just say – ” “I don’t like you,” Sam snaps. It stings like a slap to the face. But he’s quick to pull it together, voice even and steady when he continues. And doesn’t that just say everything? Sam is wholly unaffected by this, by him, by them. “Is that what you want? Everything is so easy to you,” Sam continues. “Well it’s not, for me. I have to think about the big picture, I have to think about how everything looks. So, if that’s not good enough for you, it’s – I don’t like you. I don’t wanna be with you. “It’s all or nothing, right? Are you happy? That what you wanted?” “Yeah,” Bucky lies, but his voice breaks around the edges of it, and god he is so fucking done with this. So sick of trying and having his efforts amount to nothing. “Thanks.” He puts his back to Sam and walks away, willing his eyes to stay dry until he makes it around the next corner.
from the WIP game!
#i love this au but my god it was written so long ago and its so cringe to me now it took forever to find anything shareable#sorry that it's a fight hehe#there may be something cuter... in the queue.....#jo continues to have Feelings about suburbia despite having not really grown up in that env........... interesting#another baby of the quarantine lockdown ..incredible#jo do be writing or whatever#wip games#onlysambucky#BREAKING NEWS i had the lyrics to the song the title is based on WRONG FOR ALMOST TWENTY YEARSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS#nothing is c r u e l l e r than children who come from good homes still goes crazy tho lmao
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the new troye sivan album is so good for situationship iwa tho 😭
#guys i go insane over at least one situationship fwb iwa thought a day i seriously Need him#the ff are all song lyrics#international straight shot to my heart????#open invite if u wanna come 😭😭 god i wish it was yoUUUUUU#i hope that i got u the way that u got me baby ???#COS I FEEL SO GOOD AROUND YOU?? can u imagine what we'd get up to??? there's smth diff abt tonightttttt#i dont think i can stop it i dont wanna go home alone alright ????#KINDA MISS USING MY BODY ?? FUCK IT JUST LIKE THIS PARTY DID TONIGHTTT#dont go bringing me that close cause i feel so good around you im going in tonight like i love youuu#inching closer to sunriseee how we're laying side bby sideeee#in the morning ur hands around my waist?? just us two??? in the evening on my mouth ??????!!??!#i dont wanna clean up yet keep it messy messy messyYYYYYY ??????#cause u mess me test me wrECK ME??!?!?!?!?!? all alone in my room m just thinkin bout youUUU#im still in it like that baby :-( a love junkie like that :-( im so silly like that :-( can u hit me back???#IM UNWELL#i talked so much again
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which album would you recommend as an intro to motionless in white? turns out i've had their version of somebody told me saved on a playlist for like three years, it came up today and i went oh that's kai music!!
OMG!! SO EXCITING their cover of somebody told me is a banger <3 thats really funny that u have apparently been listening to miw the whole time without knowing sdbjhfnksjdlfs
my personal favorite album of theirs is reincarnate, which has a good blend of the different types of sounds they do as a band:
this album was also MY proper introduction to them when i was first getting into them way back when in 2014/2015, so this is usually the album that i recommend first <3
but honestly, u can start with any album u want — ive had friends who started with their most recent album (scoring the end of the world) and went back to their first album (creatures), and friends who did the opposite, and friends who just put the complete playlist on shuffle and let it play! its one of the things i love about motionless in white, because u can really start anywhere u want with their music and u will be sure to find something to enjoy :) <3
#kai.answer#like any of the albums are a great place to start#but im biased. reincarnate is my baby i love that album sm so i will recommend it#instead of being like “here kate have their Entire discography of the last 10+ years they have been a band” HGSBJDNKFSJL#edit: actually the lyric in my mobile bio is a lyric from the song reincarnate FROM the reincarnate album#“a dominion of nothing is all you will reign” that is. so if u wanted to know where that came from HSBDHJFSKL
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song of the summer
#music#love how the chorus does not rhyme#the bold choice of lyrics in ‘you just told me want me to fuck you. baby I will cuz I really want to.’#the chanting. her need to constantly try to ‘pick it up now’#this song drives me crazy but I genuinely truly literally cannot stop listening to it#I HEARD U LIKE MAGIC I GOT A WAND AND A RABBIT!#Spotify
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honestly, I think that with time Taylor is going to regret the promotion cycle for TTPD because I feel like there’s a difference between her marketing the exes angle before and now. We’ve already seen her go through the phase of setting boundaries with fans through folklore and evermore but now she’s retconning it as actually I had only established those boundaries because I was forced to by my ex. Fans are taking this to the extreme and I feel like she’s really screwing herself over for the future when she would really need these boundaries in place but by that point she would’ve trained her fans to think that no the actual ‘truth’ is she loves fans looking into her life story and analysing her every single move and actually yeah fans should defend her honour against people that have wronged her. I think by that point even if she said she doesn’t like fans doing that, they could easily point to how she said she wanted it but actually she felt oppressed by this so maybe she’s being ‘forced’ to say that. They’re truly not going to take her word for any of it
yeah her line for boundaries with fans has always been so gray. but for a few years there she really wanted to keep that privacy and to have her kinda do a whole 360 on that again is hypocritical. like its her life she can be as open or as private as she wants about it, but like you said these newer fans (who as essentially kids- she/ social media/ the parasocial relationship has created give younger swifties a “hive mind” or cult way of thinking) don’t understand boundaries and i genuinely feel like most of them don’t have the same respect for her as a PERSON as maybe longtime swifties do. i feel like she might shift the privacy era to place blame on joe in ttpd and you just know people are gonna take that as abusive or controlling…..which is wild. i truly think someone shifted in her and she’s back on that “i need to be the most popular — so i can feel accomplished” goal and it’s annoying bc she IS.
alexa play ���everybody loves you now” by billy joel 😒
#answered#anonymous#anon#baby all the lights are turned on you / now you’re in the center of the stage#everything revolves on what you do /#and you are in your PRIME YOU’VE COME OF AGE#you can always have your way somehow……cause everybody loves you now!!!!#you can turn your back on your mistakes / you can turn your back on what you knew / just a little smile#is all it takes!#yeah you can have your cake and eat it too!!!#oh the LONLINESS WILL GET TO YOU SOMEHOW …..but everybody loves….u….now.#did i mention how much i love cold spring harbor LOL im#i’m like 99% sure of those lyrics from memory alone i’m so dumb
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I owe you a black eye and two kisses.....................tell me when you wanna come and get ‘em...................or whatever
#the LYRICS OF ALL TIME#spotify stabbing me thru the chest daily#if she does this one live...............................I will fucking dissolve into the fuckin ground bitch#I will be an EARTHWORM in the ground#maybe I'll just be crazy and piss him off til he hates me!!!!!!!!!!! YEAH RIGHT HE FUCKING LOVES ME!!!!!#LOW SLUNG BAD BITCH BABY COME AND GET U SOME#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#also bc I'm predictable. @ ho binclair literally#sam speaks
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Hummingbirds
~5.2k words
From me: Based on a song of the same name--you'll see the lyrics in a moment. You'll need to suspend your belief a bit. I'm not sure everything makes perfect sense, but. Some of this story takes place through emailing and I didn't have a good method for this. So bold will be Harry's emails. Pink writing will be hers.
Warnings: angst, fluff, anger honestly just fluffy. second chance love
Summary: Harry has been angry for a really really long time. Only one person ever made him confront his anger.
“Eli, baby, we have to go!”
Harry could hear her from outside. He smirked, sipping his tea while he waited for Buddy to do his business. The air was crisp just like October should be. Decorative spider webs lined the front porch and the flower bushes in front of it. He was utterly pleased with his life. So completely happy.
“Mommy! I can’t find my dinosaur sneakers!”
“I don’t know how to spell it,” Evie frowned. “I’m going to fail!”
“Just do your best and practice, my love. I believe in you,” she assured as she zipped her backpack up at the doorway and stuffed her feet into the slip-on sneakers by the door. They make me feel old, she told Harry. They’re the perfect shoes for a busy Mum, he assured her. And I think y’look hot wearing them.
“Eli, honey!” She called back. “They’re here by the front door!”
Harry couldn’t stop smiling. “How lucky am I, Buddy?” He asked shaking the leash slightly. The dog turned to him and then tugged him around the yard looking for the right spot; totally unaware or unaffected that Harry had the best life there was to live.
“I-M-P-E-R-U-T-I-V-E.”
“Close, baby girl,” she smiled encouragingly. “It’s an A, not U.”
She looked miserable as she stepped off the porch. Evie approached Harry while his wife bent to help Eli with his sneakers. “I’m going to fail, Daddy.”
He chuckled at the little nine-year-old. Crouched to her height twirling the leash tight around one hand. He straightened her little hair bow on the side of her head, pinning her hair back to one side. He kissed her forehead. “Mummy said y’were close. Y’did a great job. Y’jus’ have t’remember there’s an A,” he reminded her and then pinched her cheek gently. “Like the grade you’re going t’get, right?” He winked at her.
Evie’s sweet eyes lit up with new hope. She turned to the pretty woman at the door holding Eli’s hand to usher him quickly out of the house now that his shoes were securely on his feet. “Mommy! Did you hear what Daddy said to help me remember?”
She grinned so beautifully; it melted him. The center of his chest felt deliriously warm. It felt equivalent to being snuggled under a blanket with her, warm and close while it snowed outside their house. The kids drinking hot chocolate at the coffee table and a movie playing in the background.
It was unbelievable she was all his. “What did Daddy say, Evie?” Eli held onto her hand tight while he jumped from the second to last step of the porch while Evie explained the A she was going to get. “Well, I guess you inherited your smarts from Daddy, hmm?” Which was unequivocally a joke. She was a hundred times smarter than him. Or at least it felt that way. But he loved her so much for never making him feel less than. She was good at that. It was impossible to feel less than in her presence.
She was good at everything. Her job, being a wife, but perhaps his favorite thing, she was a tremendous mother. Something he knew she would be good at, but not to the extent he witnessed on a daily basis. Eli hurried to Harry and Buddy petting the dog’s head and giggling when he licked his face. Harry kissed the top of his head and gave his little body a squeeze. “What smarts?” Harry asked.
She rolled her eyes as she finally approached her family. “You’re plenty smart, baby,” she shook her head with a gentle smile. The two kids that looked like the perfect combination of them went to her car and climbed into their respective seats. Harry wrapped his free arm around her back and pulled her to his side. He kissed her temple, nosing along her hairline.
“Not as smart as m’beautiful wife,” he reminded her. She laughed.
“I love you.” She tilted her head up for a kiss which Harry never let her wait for.
“I love you,” he grinned into the kiss.
“Ew!” Eli called.
“Mommy, let’s go!” Evie was eager to get to school and ace her spelling test.
“Bye Daddy!” Eli shouted. She gave his cheek a final peck and she headed across the yard to take their kids to school. “See you at my soccer game!”
“Hey kitten?” He called.
“Yeah?” She asked over her shoulder.
“M’a lucky man t’have you,” he reminded her.
She shook her head, laughed. “Me too, baby. Luckiest girl in the world to have you.”
The second her door closed behind her a swarm of hummingbirds fluttered so loudly into the yard. Seemingly out of nowhere. The noise of their wings was unbelievable. A dull roar. It was hundreds of the little birds, and she paid no mind to them as she started her car. Buddy didn’t care about the intrusion either. Even the kids were indifferent. “Are y’seeing this?” He called out to her. He blinked curiously when she didn’t respond. “What’s with all the—”
*
I had a dream last night / we were married in that house you always talked about / you were rushing to get the kids to school / packing their lunches, reviewing their spelling words / it was hummingbirds
Harry’s heart was beating like he had just finished a workout. His skin felt clammy. The sheets were wrapped too tightly around his legs. He groaned as his alarm vibrated to the same hum of the birds in his dream. The music playing alongside the vibration made him grumpy. “What the fuck?” He whispered and smacked the song off. He wished he could go right back. Did Evie pass her test? Did Eli score a goal?
Did she still love him the way he dreamed about?
*
Dr. Hendren listened to Harry’s dream but very much already knew the ending. It was the same as all his dreams with the house and the girl that he had been hearing for ten years.
“Harry,” the doctor said gently as he watched Harry on his screen. “Do you know what hummingbirds symbolize?”
“No,” Harry was grumpy. He always was after a dream that was so real so lifelike. It wasn’t fair. He just wanted her back. Wanted to see her. Wanted to know.
“Healing.” Dr. Hendren was quiet while Harry processed that. He worked his jaw, swallowing, and flexing it as he tried to get the words to come out. His body felt tense. Like he was trapped inside a box that was too small. That didn’t seem right. He didn’t feel like he was healed. He was still frustrated most of the time. Work was a minor distraction, and the loneliness was crippling at times. The only reprieve was dreaming of that pretty girl he knew so many years ago.
Why did it have to be her? She didn’t deserve Harry and his bad attitude. She already suffered through it for two years at a time when life should have been fun, lovely, sweet. They were kids and Harry was an ass. He never even said he loved her back then.
“Don’t you think,” Dr. Hendren continued quietly, and Harry knew what he was going to say. “You’ve been quiet long enough about what you want?” He shrugged. “Harry,” he tutted.
“I wasn’t a good boyfriend.”
“You were a kid.”
“She deserved more.”
“Then tell her. Worst case scenario, she doesn’t want to talk to you and you’ll have some closure and you can stop dreaming about it.”
Harry remained silent, looking around his empty apartment. He took a deep breath and nodded. “Alright. I’ll reach out to her.”
“Harry,” Dr. Hendren said quietly. “Have you thought about the best-case scenario?”
He shook his head. Thatkind of hope could kill him. But he knew why the dreams were so powerful these days. Why they were so steady and quick.
Woke up bleeding from my mouth / I bit my tongue right through / well I broke the habit / I guess that I’d had it not saying the things I need to
The following morning, he searched his inbox from an email he hadn’t used in ten years and found the address he never thought he’d email again after he broke up with her way back when.
But Harry wasn’t twenty anymore. He was trying to move on. Trying to fix things that should have been fixed a long time ago. He sat on the couch, typed out seven different versions of the message and clicked send before he could overthink it any longer. He slapped the computer shut and rubbed his hands on his pants. He took a sip of the tea he made hoping to calm himself and told himself that it was okay if she didn’t answer.
Hey. Long time. Not sure if you use this email. I know it’s been a long while. Hope you’re well. ... I’ve been thinking of you. And truthfully, I had a pretty realistic dream that you were in the other night. Nothing weird. Just my old self and back then and... I don’t know. ... How are you?
If she was working, she might just be getting settled. Or maybe out with a friend. Running errands. He refrained from imagining a little family that was waiting on her for dinner but reminded himself anyway that there were a million reasons she—
His phone lit up on the table beside the computer and his heart skipped a beat.
Harry Styles. As I live and breathe :) I’m well! How are you?
That little smiley face made his heart ache with adoration for her. He could picture her pretty face smiling. But she answered.
Good. Yeah. I… I’ve been going to therapy regularly. Finally had to and... my doctor and I have discussed a lot of things. You were one of them. I just... wanted to chat with you. I’m sorry, this is so out of the blue and weird.
No! Not at all, Harry. I’m glad you reached out. It’s really nice to hear from you. Therapy? That’s amazing! Do you like it?
I’m a work in progress.
Aren’t we all? :)
He smiled feeling relieved. Even just reading words on a screen made him feel at ease. He could practically hear her sweet, encouraging voice.
What are you up to? Do you live in state still?
Yes! I actually just moved down the road from the college. I’m a guidance counselor at the local high school.
That’s lovely. I’m not surprised you accomplished your goals. Your students are lucky to have you. Are you doing okay? It has to be draining.
A lot of the time yeah. But it’s rewarding as hell. You know I love kids, and I love being able to help.
Harry wondered if it was possible to love her more than he ever had before.
There’s a shadow on my shoulder / always whispers in my ear / that I’m so angry all of the time / I should be alone another year / I didn’t say it how you needed it / must have written it down a thousand times / all the things I would scream at the top of my lungs / if I wasn’t so busy saying I’m fine.
Harry had a habit of not saying what he was feeling. He bottled so much of it up and hid it from the rest of the world. Even people he loved. When he was dating her back in college, he kept a lot hidden and exploded when she asked him simple questions about himself. Trying to understand him and why he was angry all the time. Her willingness to look past it, try and help, and just continue to be kind to him made him angry too. It was constant, draining. It was like he couldn’t help himself.
There was a tiny voice in his head that told him he was too angry for her. She deserved someone lovely and sweet. Someone who would talk to her and tell her things. Be the person she deserved. Because despite everything, Harry loved love. It was nearly impossible for him to show it back then. But he did. He wanted to love her the way she needed.
But he was so busy being angry and bottling his emotions he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t love her the right way.
It was so unfair to her and looking back on it made him feel like a proper ass.
So, he was grateful for the email communication. He couldn’t imagine having this conversation with her about all this in person. They chatted for days. Catching up on things, reminiscing. Their email chain was up to 100 something messages. Some messages were long. Harry chatted about his family and she about hers. There were updates on work. On friends they still spoke to and no longer did. The conversation continued over the course of a little under a week.
But the most shocking details came from her.
I mentioned I moved... my ex-fiancé broke off our engagement. Don’t feel too bad for me, it’s actually a relief in hindsight. Something I’ve been trying to figure through. It’s why I know that anything you feel you did wasn’t nearly as bad as you thought it was. There’s far worse relationship enders than a little bit of anger.
Jesus, I’m so sorry, kitten.
Well, isn’t that a sweet name for sore eyes :) Don’t be sorry. It’s good. I have this cute apartment to myself and it’s for the best it happened now before there were too many variables to consider...like kids or a house or something, you know? I’m definitely sad. But he wasn’t the one for me at the end of the day.
Sorry for dumping all that on you. It’s not really fair given our past. I think a lot of my friends disagree with my choice on this to let him go so it’s nice to just tell someone non-judgmental.
Harry felt angry the way he used to. The way that made him want to scream and he felt the desperate need to message Dr. Hendren because he felt out of his depth. All he said was sorry. How could she feel he was non-judgmental. He was judgmental. He was judging the fuck out of the piece of shit that broke her heart and made her sad.
But he was no better.
The man is an idiot to lose you. I know from experience.
:) I have to head to bed, there’s a big pep rally tomorrow at school so I have to have my brain ready for chaos. Sleep well Harry.
Good night, kitten.
He reread those messages over and over and right before he was going to fall asleep, his phone lit up with one more message.
You’re not an idiot by the way. He might be, but you, Harry Styles are not.
So of course, he dreamed of Evie, Eli, and the sweet girl at the other end of his emails that night.
And hummingbirds.
Thousands of hummingbirds.
*
Most of their messages were short.
I’ve been going to therapy for three years now.
That’s wonderful, Harry. Really. Do you like it?
Yeah...it’s hard.
:( Yeah... It really is. Do you like your therapist?
Yeah. I’ve had him the whole time.
Yeah? That’s good. I’m... proud of you. I don’t want to be weird about it, but I know you were angry. Really angry. It wasn’t good. You didn’t deserve that. I’m glad you have someone to help you work through it.
...You were so nice to me. When you shouldn’t have been. I didn’t treat you right.
You were wonderful, Harry. We were practically kids. If our relationship had any faults, it was because we were too young. I don’t regret a second of time being with you.
His heart skipped a beat. He felt that frustration from back when they were young, and she was so understanding but it didn’t make him grumpy or feel inadequate. All he felt was a sense of belonging. Something he probably would have felt back then if he could have gotten out of his own way. She was willing to look past it then as she was now.
You’re much too forgiving. He wrote. Because old habits die hard.
You weren’t fine, Harry. You didn’t know. We didn’t know what we were dealing with at that age.
Harry hadn’t a clue what he was dealing with. Did he even know now?
Can... can I give you something?
Give me something?
Yes. I... I can bring it to your apartment or to school or we can meet, I just... I’ve been trying to let it go but I think... I think my dream was reminding me that... there’s more to you. More I need to do for you.
Sure, if you think it will give you closure.
God, Harry wanted anything but closure.
Just to clarify: I don’t think you owe me anything.
I kept a lot hidden from you. I held back and it wasn’t fair. All you wanted was to love me and I wouldn’t let you.
It’s a vulnerable thing, Harry. To be loved. You didn’t do anything wrong. We were just young.
But... you knew I wasn’t fine, and you tried and... I just wasn’t fair to you.
You were fine, Harry. I promise. Bring me whatever it is that you need to give me to make you believe you did what you could with what you had.
*
Her apartment had a wreath on the door. It was beautiful with an array of burnt orange and red flowers and green vines. The perfect fall wreath. Beside the door were three pumpkins of different sizes. If he didn’t have her address, he almost thought he would know it was her place. He looked at the mat in front of the door that said welcome, and he wondered if there was any other place where someone actually meant it.
Swallowing, he took a deep breath and knocked. After a minute, the door was out of the way.
At 18, Harry thought she was beautiful. The most beautiful girl he had ever met. During the time they dated, he thought she got more beautiful every second. Apparently, he was right because the woman before him somehow got exponentially more beautiful. Her smile was so inviting, so warm. Like he was seeing an old friend. “Hey Harry,” her voice was sweet. Not an ounce of distrust, frustration, nothing. Their breakup was ten years ago. Not a degree of anger was left.
Harry wasn’t angry either. Not anymore. But if she had broken up with him and he hadn’t done all this work to better himself, he would have been. He didn’t know how she could be so sweet after all she went through.
“Hi,” he swallowed. “I don’t want t’keep you. S’really nice t’see you,” his dream didn’t do her justice. Sure, she was beautiful especially with their imaginary kids. Simply stunning. But this was more. This was the beautiful angel he loved so much even when she wasn’t his to love.
“You’re not keeping me; do you want to come in?” She shifted to open the door wider. “I can make some tea. Or we can order pizza?”
“No,” he shook his head. “I jus’ want t’give y’this,” he handed her the shoe box.
She opened the lid. “Well, you know I won’t say no to shoes,” she smirked.
As much as he wanted to laugh at her joke, he felt like he made a mistake. The box was out of his hands. Not because of what was in there but because of the fear of rejection and being so vulnerable. Feelings of inadequacy were currently circulating through his bloodstream. “Um... s’not—”
“What is this?” She asked, tilting her head. He swallowed, pinched his lower lip between his fingers and took a deep breath.
“S’letters.”
“Letters?”
“I wrote t’you.”
“Me?”
He took a deep breath. “M’sure y’know m’not good at saying what m’feeling.”
She replaced the lid, leaning against the frame. “I feel like I’m a little lost here, Harry.”
He nodded, shoved his hands in his pockets so he wouldn’t fidget or reach back out to take it from her. His mouth felt dry. He wished he had taken her offer for a glass of water now. “I know y’said y’thought we were fine. But m’not happy with how I treated you. Y’were an angel. The perfect girlfriend and I treated y’unfairly a lot. I guess I’ve really held onto that and some of those letters are old but when I hit low points I thought ‘bout what y’said back then. How I wasn’t on m’own. I was allowed t’be angry. But I had t’let people in. All that. I wrote t’you a lot over the years. M’therapist said it was actually one of the smartest things I’ve done on m’own,” he chuckled. “I want you t’read them. When y’have time. I guess. I don’t know,” he cleared his throat. “This is really scary,” he admitted.
“Okay,” she nodded encouragingly and reached out to his forearm. She squeezed it reassuringly. It was only a touch on his arm, and he felt so good feeling it. He knew it was her training kicking in. Like a broken, beaten student at her office door. “I can do that,” she assured him. “Do you want me to text you about each one? Or just a summary of all of them? Or do you want me to not say anything?”
He looked at his feet. “Fuck...” he whispered to himself. “I don’t know.”
“Okay,” she took a deep breath. “Thank you,” she smiled. “I’ll start reading tonight and I’ll decide in the moment. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want.”
He nodded, looked at his feet. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry?”
“S’a lot.”
“I enjoy reading, Harry,” she grinned and moved her hand to his upper arm and soothingly rubbed up and down. “Thank you for trusting me.”
Of course he did. There was no one else he really did. He nodded, feeling nauseous but still lighter. “I’m gonna go now,” he swallowed.
“I’ll email you,” she assured him with a smile and headed inside.
*
Like it grows old real fast / how much you can love and not get it back / were we too attached? / It’s a shame how often goodbyes last / I thought we were better than that / I thought I was stronger at last.
The knock on the door was hurried, eager. Insistent on being heard.
At first, he felt frozen in the kitchen cleaning up the dinner he made himself and placing the dirty dishes in the sink. Maybe he imagined the knock. Maybe he was just dreaming again. Plus, she said she would email right? This wasn’t something to feel nervous about.
But the flutter of knocking continued. He hurried from his frozen position as the rapid taps hit the wood. He knew. His gut telling him exactly who was on the other side of that door. Taking a deep breath, he swallowed before pulling it out of the way.
“You bought me the house?!” She shrieked.
Harry dipped his head to avoid her eyes. “Yes.”
“Harry Styles, what the fuck?!”
He felt sick. “You hate it?”
Her eyes were red, glossy. Not what he expected at all. But why wasn’t it? This wasn’t normal. After a breakup of her own where she was sure she was going to marry the guy. Harry appeared out of nowhere. Telling her that he had a dream about her, and he hadn’t stopped thinking about her.
She covered her mouth and shook her head. “Harry,” she croaked.
“I’m—"
“You can’t buy me a house! We’re not even... Harry. This is insane! You have to see that!”
He shrugged. “I guess... but... I don’t know, kitten. I think about you all the time. I see this house in my sleep. I see our life in m’dreams every night.”
She was wearing only socks. Like she didn’t even have time to put on shoes. She held the paper in her hand wrinkled like she had read it hundreds of times already even though he had only given it to her the night before and he just knew which one was in her hands. She cleared her throat and read the date from ten years ago before she read the remainder of the letter.
To the resident(s) of 1278 Chestnut Street
My name is Harry Styles, and I am a college student in town. My girlfriend and I walk by your lovely home every day when we head to our favorite coffee shop after class. We love your home. Or I should say, my girlfriend LOVES your home. She claims it’s her dream home. The porch, the yard, the location... everything. She even loves your driveway. Every bit of your house is part of this fantastic dream she has of the life she wants in the future.
I don’t know if I’ll be with her forever. I am... working on myself. I’m not very good at all this relationship stuff. Especially when it comes to her. Quite frankly, I think she deserves way better than me. But on the off chance I am lucky enough to keep her in my life for as long as I would like, I want to make her dreams come true. She deserves that. She deserves every single one of her dreams to come true. She is the kind of girl that deserves every good thing that can possibly be provided for her.
If you ever find yourself selling, would you please consider emailing me first? Of course, if you have family that you plan on giving your home to, I understand. I can’t even promise I’ll be able to afford it, but I’ll want to know. If only to pass on the message to her somewhere down the line. She deserves the chance to have all her dreams come true.
I’m not sure where you are in life or if you have ever been in a relationship like this one. This girl is so special. She’s an angel. The kind of love that even a movie couldn’t show, or a book couldn’t write. I’m lucky to have her right now and I don’t know why she’s with me. I don’t know why I’m even sending this crazy letter other than I know I have to try. Even if she’s smart enough to leave me, I want her to know her dream home is available. Somewhere down the road. Even if we’re not on the same road anymore. That’s what she deserves.
I’m sorry to bother you like this. I hope you can understand what love can do to a guy in college with a girlfriend who is LEAGUES above him. Thank you for taking time to read this and I hope you continue to enjoy your lovely home.
Sincerely,
Harry
Her voice shook as she read it. “You sent that when we were in college.” He nodded, swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at the packet stapled together. “They emailed you,” she whispered. He nodded again.
“Dear Harry. We got your letter. When the time comes. We’ll be moving closer to our children. They’ve never expressed interest in our house the way you have. My wife and I met in college and believe me, I know a little something about finding the girl of your dreams. It’s nice you’re working on yourself. You deserve the life that fits this house too. We hope it’s with the girl that is leagues above you (although, we imagine she’d think differently). We’ll be in touch. The Andersons.”
Harry watched her flip the page as she made eye contact with him briefly before returning her gaze to the paper in front of her.
“Dear Harry. We hope life is treating you well. That you’re working on yourself, and your girlfriend is still around. If she’s not, we hope you’re not being too hard on yourself. We wanted to let you know we’ll soon be moving to a retirement community close to our son. We want to have you (and your girlfriend) over for dinner if you’re available. Let us know.”
Harry knew what was coming but he was still terrified. Why was she here? Barefoot. Reading the letters to him. What did she think.
“Dear Harry. It was so nice to meet you in person. Here is the contract we discussed. See you soon.”
He rubbed the back of his head. “Kitten,” he whispered.
“Dear Harry. We hope you get her back. Enjoy your home. Never stop giving out your love. The Andersons.”
She was teary, swallowing hard. Her hands were shaking as she held the papers in front of her. “You bought me a house.”
He nodded. There was a pause. “M’sorry I took so long.”
She dropped the papers and launched herself into his arms. He stumbled back at the impact. Her arms around his neck, her feet barely touching the floor as she tucked her face into his shoulder. “Harry,” she whimpered. Harry sighed, wrapped his arms tightly around her, one at her waist, the other hand cupping the back of her head.
“I’ve loved you for so long,” his voice felt raw. Like he was the one that was crying and shaking. Not her.
She sniffled and nodded. “I know,” because she did. She read every single letter. Watched the date change but one thing never did and that was the love she felt in each letter.
“M’so tired, kitten,” he croaked.
“Of what, baby?” She cupped his face. The emotion on his face was tender and nothing like she remembered from ten years prior. Her thumb soothingly rubbed his cheek.
“Life without you,” he closed his eyes tight. “This house is yours I want nothing more than for you t’have it, but I want it t’be ours.”
She sniffled, ducked her head briefly as she glanced around. “You decorated it for Halloween,” she whispered.
“You would have done better.”
She snorted. “Harry...”
“If this is the house that makes you happy then I want it jus’ as much, kitten. But you’re my home. You always have been.”
“I don’t know what to say Harry,” she whimpered.
“Say yes.”
“Harry...” she whispered.
“Please, I’m so tired of loving and loving and never feeling that way. I know s’how I made y’feel in college and y’jus’ dealt with it. Y’jus’ wanted love and I didn’t give y’what y’needed. But m’ready now. M’so ready t’do whatever y’need t’love you the way y’deserve. The way y’always deserved.”
Not for the first time in his life, Harry prayed that if this was a dream, he would never wake up.
He never thought he would hold her again. Never thought she would be in the house she always wanted. Or that she would know he was sorry for how he was back when he was an angry kid.
Perhaps most importantly, he never thought he would feel her lips on his ever again.
--
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taesan is for …
sungho • riwoo • jaehyun • taesan!! • leehan • woonhak
a/n. hi loves!! i’ve decided to let bonedo join enha + txt for this series on my blog ^__^ the very first one being taesan~ AKA. another self callout post . please enjoy onedoor <33
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ──
taesan is for those who fail to love in moderation; you can see it in the way they speak so fondly of their friends; the various trinket collections scattered around their room; the way their voices raise a pitch around babies or animals; the love letters they’ve never sent collecting dust in the closet.
taesan is for those who treat their playlists like little diaries; bits and pieces of them hidden behind lyrics they relate to all too well; the people they think of when those love songs play; the memories associated with each soulful melody; the endless nights they spent with music as their only comfort.
taesan is for those who obsess over personality tests, archetypes, and astrology because they have an ache to be known; for anything to give breath to their identity because its proof that they are someone (what’s ur favorite uquiz… i know u have one,,).
taesan is for those who cringe whenever a particular name shows up in their predicted text box or photo gallery memories (they can’t hurt you anymore, i promise).
taesan is for those who are hyper independent because they don’t believe that their needs are worth the time of others (to deny help is a disservice to yourself,,, i hope that one day u can open up your heart again my love).
taesan is for those who carry a particular melancholy with them, who have diligently learned to live alongside it despite it all (happiness isn’t something meant to be deserved, but you deserve it all).
── ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
req to be added to taglist !! ^^ until next time xx take care of yoursellf <3
#⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ yenni works#boynextdoor#bonedo#boynextdoor fluff#boynextdoor imagines#boynextdoor scenarios#boynextdoor headcanons#boynextdoor taesan#taesan fluff#taesan x reader#han taesan x reader#taesan scenarios#taesan headcanons#taesan angst#taesan comfort#han taesan headcanons#han taesan#taesan imagines#han taesan imagines#han taesan the man u are </333
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