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#awkward yet also sexy?
lena-in-a-red-dress · 5 months
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Blue and Fire Engine Red, Pt 2
Kara shuts the door of her car shut behind her, and smoothes her sweating palms down the front of her jeans. She should have stayed in uniform, she thinks. She’s no longer on shift, but she always feels more confident with a badge pinned to her chest. As it is, wearing jeans and a tee shirt, she feels exposed, as though anyone looking at her would be able to see just how fast her heart is racing.
But she’s come this far-- she can see this through. Exhaling deeply, Kara starts the short walk up the drive to the firehouse’s open bay doors. As she crosses the threshold sounds of activity fills her ears. She glimpses firefighters rolling hoses and mounting them on the engine, and others are buffing the chrome bumper of the ambulance. She catches the eye of one, she thinks she recognizes him from multiple calls– Brainy, she’s heard the others call him. He brightens at the sight of her, and to her horror comes trotting over to greet her. 
“You are approximately 32 minutes late, Sergeant Danvers,” he says precisely. He clasps his hands behind his back. 
“I–I’m sorry?” Kara asks. She hadn’t told anyone she was coming, let alone what time she planned to show up.
“Since I glimpsed you conversing with Lieutenant Reilly, I anticipated you would seek her out. Seeing as your shift ended one hour ago, and the precinct is 30 minutes from the firehouse, you are, by my calculations, late.”
Kara blinks. “There was traffic on the freeway… how did you–?”
“The lieutenant can be found in the gym,” Brainy clips, extending an arm towards the far corner of the engine bay. There, Kara glimpses a glass paneled wall and the outline of a pull-down machine. 
“Thank you,” Kara issues numbly.
“You are most welcome.” Brainy then turns and returns to the ambulance and his chores. By now Kara’s thundering heart has climbed to her throat, but it;s too late to back out now that she’s been seen.
Kara wipes her palms again, nodding to herself. “You can do this,” she murmurs. “Look sharp, Danvers.”
Kara follows the hum treadmills and the clink of weights to the back right corner, where a glass paneled room sat under the spiraling staircase up to the second floor. There she stops, mesmerized by a dark swinging ponytail. Lena.
Lena running.
Lena running in a tank top and spandex shorts. Muscled arms swing in rhythm with her bobbing head, and Kara can glimpse round earbuds nestled in her ears. 
She almost turns away, if only to keep from getting caught ogling. But a sweaty towel smacks Lena in the side of the head, pulling her attention to the young woman smirking off to Kara’s left. Nia, is it?
“Got a visitor, LT!”
Lena’s head swivels towards Kara without breaking stride. Her sweaty features brighten at the sight of her. 
“Sergeant Danvers!” she chirps. She hops onto the strats of the treadmill, taking a moment to tap the machine off before stepping down entirely. She uses Nia’s towel to wipe her glistening face and neck, her breath huffing lightly. Kara’s mouth goes dry. “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming.”
Kara blinks, giving herself a little shake to re-orientate herself. Then she gives as easy a grin as she can manage. “And give up a free autograph? Not on your life.”
A smirk crosses Lena’s features as Nia steps up to stand at her shoulder. “Autograph?”
Kara plucks her calendar from her bag, giving it a playful flourish. Nia’s brow furrows, then lifts in delight.
“Oh my god! Miss March has a fan?!”
Lena turns towards her coworker with a roll of her eyes. “Nal…”
“Yeah?” 
“Give us a minute, will you?”
“But–!” 
“Nia.”
Nia sighs. “Fiiiiine…” She grabs her water and phone from beside the weight bench, and all but prances out with a smug, knowing smile in Kara’s direction. “Nice seeing you, Sergeant.”
They wait until Nia slips out, leaning them together with nothing but charged air between them. Kara gazes at Lena, who gives a soft smile in return. “Hey.”
“Hey,” Lena smiles back. Her cheeks are flushed, and Kara feels a glimmer of satisfaction at the thought it might not be entirely from exertion. 
“So…” she says. “I have a place or two in mind for that drink. Someplace… friendly.”
Lena gives a slow nod. “I like friendly.”
“Someplace where we could get some privacy.”
Another nod, this time accompanied by a deliberate step forward. “Privacy is good.”
“And, ahhh… one of them just so happens to be walking distance from my place.”
Dark eyebrows lift in surprise, and suddenly Kara finds herself awkwardly trying to reel herself back.
“I mean, you know, in case we can’t drive after. I didn’t mean to imply– not that I expected… um, that.”
Pressing her lips together, Lena waits for Kara to talk herself out. It serves to jolt Kara back into herself; she chuckles. “You going to cut me a break here or what?”
“Oh, no, not at all,” Lena returns, grinning. “I’m curious to see how far we’re not going to go on this date.”
Kara laughs. “Okay, okay. Look– what I mean is that I don’t expect anything more than a drink to get to know you better. That’s all.”
With a slow nod, Lena saunters even closer. “Message received,” she murmurs smoothly. “That said…”
She leans in close, until Kara can smell the tantalizing tang of sweat and the subtle fragrance of Lena’s shampoo. Her heart pounds so hard there’s no way Lena can’t hear it.
“If any of that,” Lena continues, “were to follow… I wouldn’t be averse to it.”
Unable to help her answering grin, Kara cocks her head. “Well, before we even get to that, we do have one order of business to get to first.”
She flips the calendar tauntingly between them, even going so far as to let the thing tap against Lena’s chest when she waggles it playfully. Lena glances down sharply, clearly having forgotten the “true” purpose of Kara’s visit. She throws her head back and laughs a full belly laugh that turns Kara’s insides to jello.
“Guess I’ll have to rustle up something to sign that with–”
A marker flies out of nowhere, bouncing off of Lena’s chest. She fumbles to catch it, and Kara lunges for it on reflex. Their heads crack together audibly, and they both stagger apart, cursing.
“Jesus fuck–!”
“Godammit!”
Nia’s voice calls cheerily from outside. “You’re welcome!”
Kara locks eyes with Lena, who grimaces at her. 
“You said something about privacy?”
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foldingfittedsheets · 3 months
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I’d like to entertain and enliven you now with the saga of my Slut Era.
I’ve always been a serial monogamist and my shortest long term relationships clocked in at three years. So perhaps that’s why when I finally broke it off with my ex I went insane on dating. Part of it was definitely just that between anxiety and loneliness I wanted to fill up my time.
This happened when I was living alone for the first time, no roommates, just me and my little cat Leeloo. I didn’t want to come home to an empty house so instead I set up dates.
Most of these were disastrous. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I had a lot more first dates than second because they’d seen enough, including the one where people aggressively complimented me.
But after a few months I had four people I was seeing simultaneously. I was up front with all of them that things were not exclusive, and they all agreed, so no infidelity took place here, just a lot of hijinks.
Here’s who was on the dating roster:
• An apprentice woodworker that we’ll call Jill. I honestly thought at 26 years old that her being 21 wasn’t a problem age gap and I quickly learned that there was a vast gulf of both maturity and life experience between us. Jill described herself as “heteroflexible” and had just dumped her first boyfriend to flirt it up with me.
• A married woman looking for a friends with benefits. We’ll call her Alice. I insisted on meeting her husband first to be sure I wasn’t part of a cheating mess and he gave me his blessing when I stayed over at her house. Years later when he and Alice had divorced I would go on to sell him and his new fiancée an engagement ring and we both realized at the end how we knew each other and it was wildly awkward. Alice was nice, but a hardcore vegan who insisted I brush my teeth if I so much as ate string cheese before I could kiss her. She was also unhappy in her marriage and was feeling out if I’d want to get serious.
• A bartender dubbed Snakebites, so called because of her signature piercings. She cooked me a steak so raw it was still mooing and some of the best asparagus I’d ever had. In our singular sexy encounter she bit my nipple and I never got over it. Really don't bite someone if you don't know their preference and work up in pressure. We weren’t terribly compatible but neither of us were willing to admit it yet. Truthfully I considered still dating her solely because I desperately wanted her bathroom. It had all black tile, black toilet, black sink, a rain shower in the corner and a jacuzzi tub. I may not have loved her but god I loved that bathroom.
And finally,
• My beloved, who I would go on to marry, who was dealing with a lot of personal stuff at the time. Obviously that meant I liked them the best of all the people I was seeing because we were both disasters at the time.
So that’s the cast of this little misadventure. Now, our story begins with Jill.
Jill was someone who heightened my anxiety. Each of the three times she came to my home she brought and left more stuff. A self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans collection of DVDs. It was like she was trying to move in. She also liked to deride my taste in things, frequently calling me a pleb when I mentioned a band or show I liked.
She was working on a gorgeous little decorative table in her woodworking program. The main wood for the top had a beautiful dapple of knots like jaguar spots, and when she showed me a picture I exclaimed how pretty it was.
“Do you want it?”
“Oh- I mean it’s lovely, I wouldn’t mind having it, but you should sell it and make some money!”
But she was adamant. She’d give me the little side table. At about this time, Alice was starting to get awfully lovey for a FWB. I knew she wasn’t happy with her husband but I also knew we were not a good fit. Fun fact: Alice and her husband were step siblings with a pretty hefty age gap. They got together when he stumbled upon a kink photo shoot she’d done with vegetables. None of their family was happy about the relationship but they weren’t related by blood so it was fine.
So I was fending off more overt romantic advances from Alice, and feeling increasingly like I needed to break things off with Jill. Snakebites wasn’t ever initiating communication and I decided to pull a lot of plugs at once.
I ghosted Snakebites, told Alice that I thought we should cool it, and in a move worthy of a rom-com I asked my beloved if I could pretend we were exclusive to put off Jill. They agreed and I texted Jill to let her know that I was no longer single.
I was not prepared for Jill’s response. She. Was. Devastated. She flew off the handle. She’d just been waiting for the right time to tell me how she felt about me! How dare I do this to her!
What about the table?!
“You should keep the table, it’s gorgeous, you’ll be able to sell it, but I don’t expect a free table.”
Silence met me after that text. I worried and fretted and eventually headed home.
There on my doorstep. The table.
It was a small little end table, reeking of oil and polish, but very beautiful. I brought it inside. The little drawer didn’t even have a knob or guide rails. But it did have a handwritten bill proclaiming that it was costing me $500.
“I can’t afford a $500 table, Jill!” I texted.
“Well you kept saying how nice it was. I spent a lot of time on it.”
“I’m not saying it’s not worth $500” (it wasn’t, it was a tiny side table made by an apprentice) “but I can’t buy a $500 table.”
“Make me an offer.”
I stared at the little table. I did actually like it, but I worried about the repercussions of entering into this deal. Hesitantly I typed back, “$300.” I didn’t think it was worth that much but I didn’t want to insult her too badly.
This suited her for the night. But the next day she informed me she needed a new bed, and that she’d take her $300 in credit toward a new mattress. I spent the whole next day basically wrangling with her over what she wanted and eventually she spiked back up to demanding $500 for the damn table.
“Let me just give it back,” I begged. It was not the first, second, or even third time I’d asked to return the thing but this time she finally relented and gave me her address. Since she lived with her parents still I’d never been over.
I called up my beloved and said, “Hey, I need moral support, can you run an errand with me?”
They agreed which is how we loaded up a self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans DVD collection, and the table from hell into my little car together. Jill had said to meet her at one o'clock. I intended to drop everything off at noon and be done with this madness.
But while my beloved and I were on the doorstep leaving everything I heard, “Jill? You’re home early,” through the door. Her mom opened it to peer at us in confusion.
“I was just bringing Jill’s stuff back!” I chirped in alarm.
With little tact and a lot of speed we left her with Jill’s collection of things and then I sped out of there like my tail was on fire. I handed my phone to my beloved as I zoomed away instructing them to block Jill’s number. I was free. The tabletross around my neck had been returned.
It was about a month after that when my beloved and I officially began dating exclusively. I had wrapped up all my messy dating threads and it was a relief to be in a relationship again. They went on a trip to Mexico shortly after we made it official.
So I knew they were out of town. But next morning I walked out to my car and beheld a lipstick kiss pressed to the drivers side window.
I was petrified. I had just dumped three girls at once and had an extremely messy back and forth with one of them. Did I have a stalker?!
Of the girls, Alice seemed like likeliest candidate, being of a stronger lipstick variety girl than Jill or Snakebites. We had ended things a bit stiffly, but still cordial. She just laughed when I asked if she knew anything about it. “Nope,” she said, “but good luck.”
I’d rather have walked over broken glass then text Jill, and I’d firmly ghosted Snakebites so I was scared to reopen communication to ask if she was stalking me. I had to drop it. But it haunted me, that lipstick kiss.
For months I was jumpy, wondering which of my spurned lovers had done it. And why. Was it a threat? A goodbye? I lay awake thinking about it, worrying about how everyone I’d dated knew where I lived, which car was mine.
Finally, nothing else happened and I moved on. The kiss would remain a mystery and I had to be content with that.
It was a year later when I finally started filling my mom in on my dating escapades that I finally got closure. She was hooting and laughing as I went over the table debacle. Then I paused and added, “And then this kiss showed up on my car.”
“Did you like it?”
“What? No! I’m pretty sure one of them was stalking me! Who else would leave a kiss on my car?”
My mom started bellowing with laughter. “I did!” She wheezed.
Apparently. My mother had been driving by my place. And decided that a cute little gesture would be to leave me a kiss. And then decided to never mention it to me even though she’s never done anything like that previously.
“It scared the crap out of me!” I yelled while she collapsed with helpless laughter. “I thought I had a stalker! How could I possibly have known that was you?!”
“How could I have known you’d just broken up with three girls at once?” She wheezed in rejoinder and like. Fair play.
So that’s how my mom convinced me I had a stalker and I got out of buying a $500 table.
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mariasont · 4 months
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My Boss Won't Be Happy About This - A.H
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a/n: back to bimbo brain rot!!!! inspired by the first season that one episode (you know the one) where hotch is all macho man with elle in jamaica
masterlist
₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧
pairings: aaron hotchner x bimbo!assistant!reader
summary: you’re wrongfully arrested and hotch is not happy about it
warnings: creepy officer, inaccuracies of how law enforcement works, hotch being sexy
wc: 1.3k
"Listen I'm not the type of girl to tell someone how to do their job, but I just don't think you're doing it right."
You were speaking to an empty room, or at least, you were speaking to the mirror in front of you. It's the kind of mirror you had seen in countless interrogation scenes, the kind you usually image Hotch standing behind. You let your gaze linger, wondering if eyes are studying you from the other side, listening to your monologue.
"Well, that, and I also just don't think it's very nice." Your brand spanking new heels were tapping against the dirty floor. 
You weren't happy about that. You weren't happy about any of this. Your feet ache, but the fear of the germs lurking on the floor paralyzes any thoughts of relief by removing your shoes.
"And hey, shouldn't I get a phone call? That's a rule, I think," you mumble, lips turning downward in an unusual frown. It seems like the right time for it. "My boss is not going to take this well. I mean, he's got this look, you know? The kind that makes you want to apologize for things you didn't even do."
You conjured up his daunting expression and released a jittery laugh, all while striving to disregard the biting cold blasting from the AC vent, which seemed determine to freeze you into place. 
You were seriously out of your element, not just in surroundings but in dress--so form-fitting it left very little to the imagination. It seemed to be a good idea for a date. That was before you realized said date would be a complete disaster. Now, it felt like a trap. It had been a spectacle for a man unworthy of the effort, and as you sat in this rigid chair, you found yourself tugging at the hem every other moment, a futile attempt to preserve some semblance of modesty.
"So, when he hears about this little error... Well, let's just say I wouldn't want to be in your shoes." Six hours had passed in this dreary space, and you could feel your sanity fraying at the edges. You muttered, half to yourself, "Not that they're as cute as mine, but you get the point."
The door hinge's creak made you sit bolt upright, a silent supplication for Hotch's rescue echoing through your mind. But today, it seemed, the gods were indifferent. The officer who had arrested you stepped in.
"Having fun talking to yourself?"
You flashed your sweetest smile. "Oh, tons! But I'd have much more fun if you'd uncuff me."
He said nothing, folding his arms over his chest as he dragged his gaze up and down your body in a way that made your skin prickle in discomfort. You attempted to dispel the creeping dread, but it stubbornly lingered.
You did what you could to cover up, despite the awkward angle of your arms. "Listen, this is all just a big mistake. I work for the FBI," you insisted, though it was clear the officer's attention was fixated on your tits rather than your words. "Well, I mean, I'm an assistant for the unit chief of the BAU unit. You've heard of Aaron Hotchner, haven't you?"
The officer's mouth closed without a word, as the door was thrust open yet again, and this time, your heart leapt in recognition. Your knight in shining armor with a lethal expression.
His eyes instantly zeroed in on the officer with a look that could curdle blood, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of relief that you weren't the object of his anger. He approached you wordlessly, his every motion precise and determined.
He carefully shed his jacket, a gesture he seldom made, and draped it across your shoulders. The fleeting caress of his hand against your skin was enough to make you lean into his touch. You let out a breath that you had been unconsciously holding back. 
You watched as Hotch turned, his voice a low, steady force, his words carefully chosen and tinged with an unsettling peace. "Officer," he began, the title spoken almost as warning. "I believe there has been a grave misunderstanding. This woman is not only an esteemed member of the FBI, but she is also under my direct supervision."
He stepped closer, encroaching on the officer's personal space. You watched, almost in slow motion, as the officer's expression morphed into one of sheer terror, his earlier confidence dissolving like sugar in hot tea.
"Six hours," he continued, his voice never rising yet somehow it took up all the space in the confined room. "Six hours of unwarranted detention, without due process. I expect her immediate release. And make no mistake, this lapse in judgment will have its ramifications."
The officer was mute, his fingers clumsily unlocking the handcuffs, his movements hurried, his hands trembling. A twinge of pity flickered within you, but it was quickly overshadowed by the memory of considering the table as a makeshift blanket.
The moment the metal clicked open; you wasted no time. You flung your arms around Hotch, the pent relief and biting chill of the past few hours pouring out of you. You were desperate for warmth, specifically his warmth.
He stiffened, caught off guard by your actions. You feel the anger radiating through him, practically pulsing through his skin. As you clung to him, you felt the draft on your legs as your dress slid up, and without missing a beat Hotch's hand discreetly adjusted the fabric, all while keeping his eyes locked on the officer, a silent warning in his gaze.
Once he was certain you were decently covered, he allowed himself to draw him into his arms. One arm secured around your waist, the other weaving through your hair. You were cold. It renewed another tide of rage through his bloodstream.
With the officer's departure, the room's oppressive atmosphere lightened a touch, leaving you still latched onto your boss.
"Oh, sir, you wouldn't believe it," you started, his hands tracing up your spine and sparking a trail of goosebumps that had nothing to do with the chill. "They kept asking me about a heist, as if I'd know anything about that! And then they show me this picture, and I mean, sure, she had my hair, but that's about it."
You rambled on, and he let you, the absurdity of the situation pouring out in a stream of consciousness. Hotch's hold on you tightened. You could sense the coiled tension in him, a tempest of anger held a bay.
"And the room, it was so cold! I mean, I'm sure you can tell. My teeth were chattering, and all I could think of was how I'd rather be filing your paperwork or listening to Reid's factoids about the quantum mechanics of coffee beans."
You felt Hotch's breath on your hair as he let out a sigh. 
"I'm just glad you're here now," you whispered, finally allowing yourself to relax in his embrace.
Hotch gave a curt nod, his jaw set. He was itching to confront the officer, to unleash a tirade not meant for your ears. But he was well aware of how much you needed him right now, and that trumped everything in his book.
Hotch took a moment to compose himself before speaking. "This isn't just incompetence; it's negligence. I will have this place reevaluated for its standards, or lack thereof."
You took a step back, hands still resting on his arms, and he maintained his grip on your waist. "I bet this is the last time you'll let me go on a date without a full background check on the guy, huh, sir?"
Hotch's hold on your waist firmed just a fraction. "Maybe it's the last time I let you go on a date, period."
He was only half-joking.
"Not even with you?" You tilted your head to meet his gaze, drawing his jacket closer around you.
Hotch just simply gives you that look, the one that says a thousand words without a sound. He's telling you to tread lightly.
"Alright, I'll be good," you giggle, the tension easing from your shoulders. "Can you take me home now, please?"
He nods, "Yeah, let's get you home."
And then he leads you out, thinking to himself that the next person to take you out will be him, but that's for him to know and you to find out later.
taglist: @hotchhner @khxna
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yvesette · 4 months
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WE GOT MARRIED!
ִ ࣪𖤐 ۪ ݁ 𓈒 ── choi seungcheol
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SUMMARY: ── the premise of the popular reality show, "we got married," was simple: you and another celebrity would pretend to be married for two weeks, navigating various romantic and domestic challenges together. when your partner turns out to be choi seungcheol however, feelings complicate your perception of reality.
PAIRING: [choi seungcheol (s.coups) x f!reader] GENRE: [eventual smut, domestic fluff, angst, idol!au, fake dating, one bed, all the good shit]
CW: afab!reader, nicknames (angel, babygirl, baby, good girl), arguing (it’s sorted out), soft!dom ?? + pussydrunk cheol, big!dick cheol, fingering, penetration, safe sex (ofc), possessive!cheol, hair pulling, light choking
      ℘  ◌  ﹒ ⠀ ꢾ꣒⠀  ׅ⠀ㅤ ⑅
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── pre-show interview:
interviewer: "thank you for joining us today! can you tell us a little about yourself and what initially made you hesitant to join 'we got married'?"
you fiddle with your hands and compose yourself into a smile.
“of course. i’m y/n, and to be honest, when i was first approached about the show, i had a lot of reservations. being an idol, my life is already under constant scrutiny, and the idea of faking a marriage on national television was daunting. i was worried about how my fans would react and whether I'd be able to genuinely connect with my on-screen partner."
interviewer: "what eventually convinced you to participate?"
you think, “it was a mix of curiosity and encouragement from my friends and management. they believed it would be a good opportunity for me to show a different side of myself, one that isn't always visible on stage. plus, the idea of experiencing something as unique as a reality show marriage was too intriguing to pass up."
interviewer: "do you know who your partner will be yet?
you smile nervously, “no, i don't. it’s a complete surprise for me. all i know is that it's someone from a well-known group. i’m really curious to find out who it is!"
interviewer: "that must be exciting! can you share what your ideal type is for the camera?”
you grin thoughtfully, “my ideal type is someone who is kind-hearted and takes care of the people around them. they should have a strong sense of responsibility but also listen and understand. a good sense of humor is a must — oh and physically, i guess i find myself drawn to someone with a warm smile and expressive eyes. someone who can be both charismatic on stage and down-to-earth in everyday life."
interviewer: "finally, do you have any worries or concerns going into the show?"
you: "i’m a bit worried about how awkward it might be at first. there’s always that initial nervousness when meeting someone new, and this situation is quite intense. i hope we can get past that quickly and have a good time together.”
day 1:
you stood in front of the door to a luxurious townhome, hands fidgeting nervously at your sides. this would be your new home for the next two weeks. the camera crew gave you a nod, signaling it was time to head inside. taking a deep breath, you open the door and step into the living room, where a warm, cozy ambiance greets you. as you set your bag down, you hear the sound of the front door opening again. you turn, breath caught in your throat, and a man, looking slightly familiar to you, enters the room.
he was wearing a white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, paired with dark jeans that accentuated his tall, athletic frame. his broad shoulders and well-defined chest were subtly outlined by the fabric of his shirt, hinting at the strength beneath. the open collar revealed a glimpse of his collarbones, which added an effortlessly sexy touch to his appearance and you thanked god you’d been paired with someone this attractive, as selfish as it sounded. his face was a perfect blend of boyish charm and mature masculinity and his dark hair was styled in a slightly tousled manner.
the man in front of you carried a polite smile. for a moment, you both stood there, slightly taken aback by the reality of the situation.then, as if on cue, you both bowed to each other in polite, awkward unison. "hello!" you said at the same time, voices overlapping. realizing what happened, you both laughed nervously and bowed again, this time with even more formality.
“hi, i’m y/n," you said, smiling despite your nerves.
“i’m seungcheol. it’s nice to meet you,” he said, returning your smile.
there was a brief pause as you both sized each other up, trying to gauge the other's reaction. something about him seemed familiar, but you couldn't quite place it.
your heart skipped a beat as recognition dawned on you and you remembered his face from music and award shows. you were almost certain the man in front of you was a member of seventeen and your mind was almost more eased you were paired with another idol.
as you shook his hand, your mind raced with a million thoughts. should you mention that you know who he is? would it be weird? awkward?
before you could decide, seungcheol spoke again, his voice cheerful and inviting, “i know this is a bit of an odd situation, but let's make these two weeks memorable, okay?”
you nodded, unable to tear your gaze away from his face and your cheeks flushed slightly.
the first task was to explore the house together, finding little notes and hints left by the producers about upcoming challenges and activities. as you moved from room to room, seungcheol’s playful nature shined through. he made jokes about the odd decorations and even tried on an oversized apron in the kitchen, to which he realized how easily he could make you laugh.
in the living room, you found a note instructing you to cook your first meal together. seungcheol looked at you with genuine curiosity in his eyes. "do you cook often?"
you shook your head, “i try, but i’m not the best. how about you?”
he shrugged, “i can manage, could you hand me those eggs?”
working side by side in the kitchen, you both stumbled through the recipe, exchanging glances and giggles as you tried to make sense of the instructions. seungcheol’s presence was comforting; his easygoing demeanor made it feel less like a staged activity and you had to remind yourself of your situation every once in a while.
“careful!" you warned as he nearly knocked over a bowl of flour.
“oops," he laughed, catching it just in time. "oh my god, thanks for warning me.”
when the meal was finally ready, you both sat down at the coffee table, a sense of accomplishment and camaraderie settling in.
“you know," he says, his voice low and conspiratorial, "i have to admit, i was a bit of a fan of yours before this."
you almost spit out your food and your eyes widen in surprise, “you were?”
he nodded, a shy smirk playing on his lips. "yeah, i may or may not have listened to…a few, songs.”
you couldn't help but laugh, feeling a rush of disbelief, “well," you said, unable to hide the smile on your face, "i guess we both have some fangirling/fanboying to do then.”
seungcheol chuckled before taking a sip of his drink, “looks like we're off to a good start then."
later that evening, as you both settled on the couch to go over the day's events, you found yourself stealing glances at seungcheol when he wasn't looking. the cameras captured every moment, but by now, they had become background noise. seungcheol’s arm rested casually on the back of the couch, his presence reassuring.
"so what did you think of our first day together?" seungcheol asked, turning to you with a gentle smile.
you smiled back, feeling more at ease now. "honestly , it was fun. a bit overwhelming at first, but i think we handled it pretty well."
he nodded, his expression thoughtful. "yeah , i think so too. it’s all about getting comfortable with each other, right?"
you laughed softly, nodding in agreement. "exactly."
as the night continued, the two of you talked about your experiences in the industry, sharing stories and laughing over funny moments. the more you talked, the more you realized how much you had in common. it was easy to forget the cameras were even there.
day 5:
it had been a few days of filming and your arranged marriage with the charming seungcheol was off to an...interesting start. between the awkward getting-to-know-you interviews and staged "newlywed" activities for the cameras, you were still trying to find your footing in this bizarre situation.
one minute, you and seungcheol were bickering like an old married couple over whose turn it was to do the dishes, (it would always end with him insisting he did the chore.) the next, you'd catch him shooting you an ambiguous look from under those ridiculously long lashes, causing a fluttery feeling to erupt in your stomach. it was a constant back-and-forth of feeling flustered yet intrigued by your new husband.
today, the production crew had you and seungcheol participate in a silly pillow fight "challenge" meant to showcase your playful newlywed dynamic. what started off as an innocent, goofy bout of whacking each other with the plush objects quickly devolved into an all-out war.
giggling breathlessly, you launched another fluffy projectile at seungcheol’s head, who had now affectionately insisted you call him cheol.
he taunted with a roguish grin, deflecting your pillow attack.
you both scrambled for ammunition, whacking each other relentlessly. you shrieked as a particularly fierce blow sent you tumbling backwards onto the bed.
in a flash, seungcheol pounced - pinning your wrists above your head as he straddled your waist. his sculpted body pressed against yours, stealing your breath away.
"i win," he murmured huskily, drinking in your flushed, disheveled state. a few dark strands of hair had fallen over his forehead, making him look ridiculously pretty and you both froze as the heated tension reached a tipping point, chests heaving from the exertion of your pillow fight.
then, all at once, realization seemed to wash over both of you. this had crossed a line, strayed too far from the realm of pretend into something that felt a little too real for your comfort. seungcheol quickly released your wrists and rolled off you, running a flustered hand through his tousled hair as the cameras cut and the producers applaud your chemistry ‘played up’ for the show.
“i…sorry, i got a bit carried away there," he muttered gruffly, unable to meet your eyes.
you pushed yourself into a sitting position, clutching a pillow protectively to your chest. “no, it's...yeah, me too," you mumbled, cheeks burning.
as seungcheol swiftly excused himself, you couldn't shake the feeling that something deeper and more complicated had been irrevocably awakened on your end, you watched your fake husband’s broad back retreating towards the door, then he paused and glanced over his shoulder at you.
despite the flustered awkwardness of moments before, his gaze openly raked over your disheveled form in a way that made heat lick through your veins. you clutched the pillow tighter, suddenly feeling very exposed under his molten perusal.
as quickly as the blazing look had appeared, it faded to a neutral expression once more as he gave you a brisk nod. "i’ll...see you later," he murmured in a rough rasp before ducking out of the room, leaving you flushed and wondering what the hell had just happened.
day 9:
the sweltering summer heat had prompted the producers to film a scene with you and seungcheol enjoying some relaxation at the rooftop pool.
you tried not to stare too openly as seungcheol stripped off his shirt, revealing a toned, sculpted torso that made your mouth go dry. rivulets of glistening water trailed tantalizing paths down those firm abs as he sank into the cool pool with a contented sigh.
“you coming in or what, y/n?" he flashed you a lopsided grin, sending your pulse into an erratic stutter.
shaking yourself free of your momentary thirst, you made a big show of daintily dipping a toe in to test the temperature, “oh my god it’s freezing.” you step out of the water onto the poolside and shiver from the contact.
cheol arches an incredulous brow at your overly dramatic reaction. then without warning, he kicked up an arched wave that splashed you squarely in the face.
you sputtered in outraged shock as he cackled at your drenched, bedraggled state. you cursed at him and then tilted your head, “oh you’re gonna get it now…”
retaliating, you cannonballed directly towards him, prompting a yelp as he tried dodging the cascading wall of water.
what started as an innocent pool dip quickly devolved into an all-out splash fight, filled with laughter and shrieks, water spraying everywhere. at one point, seungcheol grabbed you around the waist from behind, holding you flush against his chest as you squealed and squirmed playfully...
as the sun dipped low on the horizon, it set the sky ablaze with vibrant shades of orange and red bled across the heavens, intermingling with streaks of brilliant pink and lavender. the surface of the rooftop pool shimmered like liquid amber, endlessly rippling and refracting the spectacular colors above.
as the playful battle subsided, you found yourselves standing chest-deep, catching your breath. seungcheol, hair plastered to his forehead, offered you a sheepish grin. his hand, reaching out to brush a stray strand from your eye, hesitated in mid-air.
the air crackled with a sudden tension, a shift from playful banter to something more intense. you held his gaze, unsure of where this unexpected touch might lead. the playful facade, for a moment, seemed to falter, revealing a vulnerability that sent a shiver down your spine.
as the camera crew wrapped their filming of the segment momentarily, cheol leaned against the pool deck, catching his breath, while you treaded water, a satisfied smile playing on your lips.
“you know," seungcheol said, his voice slightly breathless, "for someone who almost drowned me with pool water ten minutes ago - you’re pretty fun to do this whole fake marriage this with.”
his compliment caught you off guard, a blush creeping up your cheeks. you looked away, fiddling with the straps of your swimsuit and snorted, “you would have survived, trust.”
you bit your lip, “but you’re not…awful, to do this with. i’m glad it was you.”
his biceps flexed as he pushed himself off the wall, the water cascading down his toned arms. he smiled and ran a hand through his hair, which was now drying in messy waves.
you had to admit to yourself, in another situation, he was pretty close to your type. your mind took a sharp turn and a thrilling image of cheol, those big arms holding you close, pinning you down. he could easily manhandle you, and the thought sent a forbidden thrill through you.
taking a deep breath, you forced your gaze away from him, the delicious heat replaced by a cold wave of reality.
that evening, the producers insisted that as a "newly married couple," you and seungcheol needed to share the bedroom set for an authentic experience. your heart pounded as the camera crew ushered you both into the dimly lit bedroom, pulling the covers back invitingly.
"alright you two, get nice and cozy for us!" the director called out teasingly. "we’ll get some candid footage of your first night spent in the same room together as husband and wife."
you shot seungcheol an awkward look, but he just gave you a reassuring smile as he slipped an arm around your waist, pulling you close. the cameras rolled as you climbed stiffly into bed together, maintaining a prim distance at first.
however, as soon as the crew lights winked off and you were left in intimate shadows, cheol’s touch grew bolder. his arm snaked more fully around you, hand skimming along your curves as he tugged you flush against his solid frame and he watched your face for approval.
"just go with it for the cameras," he murmured in your ear, making you shiver at the feel of his warm breath fanning your neck.
you gave a shaky nod, trying to ignore the rampant spiraling spawning low in your belly from his nearness. but as the man next to you nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, letting out a contented sigh, you felt yourself instinctively relaxing into his embrace.
before long, the camera crew was dismissing themselves, leaving you and seungcheol tangled together intimately. you started to pull away, murmuring about giving him some space, but his arms only tightened around you.
“stay," he rumbled in that deep velvety tone that made heat curl low in your belly. "please. just for tonight."
you couldn't help but overthink the situation as you lay cocooned in seungcheol’s strong arms later that night. his slow, even breathing tickled the nape of your neck as he slumbered peacefully behind you.
this whole scenario - cuddling intimately, sharing a bed, his persistent insistence that you stay - it was quickly becoming difficult for you to differentiate reality and the fake of your friendship, or whatever you could call it.
realistically, there was no way seungcheol actually had romantic feelings for you, right? you were just some virtual stranger he'd been assigned to act affectionate towards for the sake of entertainment.
no, you reasoned to yourself, cheol was simply an incredibly dedicated performer who happened to be devastatingly good-looking. he was merely playing the role of an infatuated newlywed husband exceptionally well. all those lingering looks, the electrifying touches, the way he'd pulled you insistently into his embrace - it was just him staying committed to the act. you were just a tolerable person for him to pretend to be married to for the cameras. that’s all this was. if you started projecting more meaning onto your partner’s actions, reading into lingering touches and heated glances, you'd only end up getting your hopes up and complicating things.
chewing your lip, you willed yourself not to dwell on the intimacy of your current position - pressed snugly back against his toned chest, legs tangled together, breaths mingling. it didn’t mean anything. he was just...really, really good at making this fake marriage feel real.
you lay there for a long while, keenly aware of every rise and fall of seungcheol’s chest against your back, the whisper of his warm breath fanning your nape. his arm was a solid, heated band around your waist, anchoring you to his slumbering form.
carefully, you began extracting yourself from his arms, trying not to rouse him. he made a soft grumbling sound of protest as you slipped out of bed, his arm reflexively tightening for a moment before falling away. you froze, watching him with bated breath, but he merely rolled onto his back with a gusty sigh, face relaxing back into peaceful slumber.
for a long moment, you simply stood there drinking in the sight of him - all tousled ebony hair, chiseled features, lips slightly parted as he slumbered. your heart gave a powerful thud, desperate longing temporarily overwhelming rationality.
then, you wrenched your gaze away, wrapping your arms around yourself as you crept towards the door on soft feet and went to your separate bedroom. this was for the best. putting some distance between you before things inevitably became more tangled and awkward.
day 12:
"you’re burning it!" seungcheol suddenly exclaimed, pointing at the pan on the stove where the sauce was starting to smoke.
by late afternoon, you were both working on preparing dinner in the kitchen. the producers had given you a complex recipe to follow, and the pressure was mounting. seungcheol was chopping vegetables while you tried to manage the stove, but things weren't going as planned.
you glanced over, feeling flustered. "i know, i know! i’m trying to fix it!"
"well, you need to do it faster! we can't serve burnt food," he retorted, his tone sharper than you expected.
you felt a surge of irritation. "why don't you come over here and do it then if you're so concerned?"
seungcheol put down the knife he was holding, his jaw tightening. "i’m just trying to help. there’s no need to get defensive."
you turn off the stove and face him, your frustration boiling over. "it feels like you're criticizing everything i’m doing. this is supposed to be fun but—“ you sigh.
seungcheol’s expression softened slightly, but he didn't back down. "i’m not trying to criticize you. i’m just stressed because i want this to turn out well. we’re both under a lot of pressure.”
his words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken meaning. you felt a warmth bloom in your cheeks, a prickling awareness that transcended the confines of the tiny kitchen. it wasn't just the heat from the stove anymore; it was the sudden, electrifying tension that crackled between you.
whatever this "show marriage" was quickly becoming, it was growing increasingly difficult to remember it wasn't real.
his gaze held yours, a storm brewing in his dark eyes. was it just the stress of the competition, or was there something more? maybe it was the way his thumb brushed against yours as he reached for a spatula, a touch that lingered a beat too long. maybe it was the way his voice seemed to drop an octave whenever he spoke directly to you.
the air grew thick, the playful banter of the morning replaced by a charged silence. you weren't talking simply about cooking anymore. this felt like something more, something simmering beneath the surface, threatening to boil over.
suddenly, a loud clang from the living room shattered the spell. the cameraman had accidentally knocked over a vase, the sound breaking the intimate bubble you'd somehow created. seungcheol offered a grin of reconciliation, the tension momentarily broken.
as you both cleaned up the broken vase, a playful jab exchanged here and there, you couldn't shake the feeling that cheol’s feelings for you mirrored your own. maybe it was just wishful thinking, fueled by the close proximity and manufactured intimacy of the show. but a tiny, hopeful spark ignited within you. perhaps, just perhaps, this fake marriage could be a gateway into something else.
the air crackled with an unspoken apology after your argument in the kitchen. the rest of the day was filmed in a tense silence, punctuated only by the polite pleasantries expected for the cameras. seungcheol stole glances at you every now and then, his gaze laced with regret, but you studiously avoided his eyes.
dinner was a quiet affair, the weight of the fight hanging heavy between you. as the last crew member packed up their equipment and said their goodbyes, a heavy sigh escaped seungcheol’s lips. you remembered you only had two more days left with him before you parted ways and continued your daily, busy lives.
you lean against the doorframe of cheol’s assigned bedroom. he’s reading something foreign and doesn’t notice your presence at first. "hey," you started hesitantly, the artificiality of your fabricated married life suddenly feeling suffocating. he looked up, his eyes filled with a vulnerability you hadn't seen before.
"i shouldn't have snapped at you," he said, his voice rough. "this whole thing... the pressure, the cameras... it just — you know, gets to me sometimes.”
you understood. the world only saw the polished, perfect idols on stage, not the stress and anxieties that gnawed at them behind the scenes. partially this show felt like a risk of balance between speculation and approval. “i know," you admitted softly, surprised at the tremor in your voice. "it gets to me too."
silence settled again, but this time it wasn't tense. it was a comfortable quiet, an unspoken understanding blooming between you.
you took a seat on the mattress and asked him what he was reading.
“amour,” he says, flipping the book over to show you the cover.
“amour?" you asked, raising an eyebrow. "isn’t that french for love?"
cheol rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "yeah, it is. found it at the airport bookstore. it’s about a journalist who travels around france asking people about love."
a playful glint sparked in your eyes. "funny," you said, tracing the title with your finger, “didn’t know you were such a romantic.”
a wry smile tugged at the corner of seungcheol's lips. "maybe i’m just curious," he said, his voice dropping to a low murmur that made you nervous. "especially after all this... 'pretend' marriage stuff." he paused, his gaze flickering from the book to your face. "maybe the line between pretending and feeling is a little more blurry than we thought."
he words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken meaning. the playful banter you'd used as a shield these past 2 weeks suddenly felt inadequate. you met his gaze, the air crackling with a new kind of tension.
"maybe it is," you admitted, your voice barely a whisper.
the glint in your eyes softened into something deeper, something that mirrored the sudden intensity in cheol’s gaze. he set his book down on the nightstand with a soft thud, the sound swallowed by the heavy silence that had descended upon the room.
he took a slow movement towards you across the bed, his eyes searching yours with a depth that made your breath catch. you could practically feel the unspoken question hanging in the air, a question your heart already knew the answer to. there was a palpable tension between you, an invisible thread pulling you closer.
without another word, seungcheol closed the remaining distance between you. his hand reached out to cup your cheek, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. his thumb brushed against your soft skin, a gentle caress that spoke volumes. it was as if he was trying to communicate everything he felt in that simple touch, the unspoken emotions and the growing connection between you.
his eyes flickered down to your lips before meeting your gaze again, asking for permission without uttering a single word. you gave a small, almost imperceptible nod, your heart pounding in your chest.
then, he leaned in. the kiss was hesitant at first, a soft exploration that tasted of unspoken longing and a newfound vulnerability. hips lips were warm and tender against yours, moving with a gentleness that made your heart ache and charged with the electricity of forbidden desire and the sweetness of a connection that transcended the cameras and the manufactured reality of your "marriage."
as the kiss deepened, seungcheol’s other hand found its way to your waist, pulling you closer. you responded instinctively, your hands sliding up to rest on his broad shoulders. the world outside seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you in that moment. the kiss grew more passionate, an unspoken promise of the bond forming between you.
his fingers threaded through your hair, tilting your head slightly to deepen the kiss. the heat of his body pressed against yours, and you could feel the rapid beat of his heart mirroring your own. every touch, every movement was filled with a mix of tenderness and urgency, a dance of emotions that neither of you could deny any longer.
in one swift movement, seungcheol lifted you onto his lap, his strong arms wrapping around you securely. the sudden shift made you gasp, breaking the kiss momentarily. he took advantage of your parted lips, diving back in with a new intensity. his hand tangled in your hair, gripping it roughly as he deepened the kiss. the raw hunger in his actions satisfied a need you’d had since the moment you met him and ignited a new thirst in you for more than a kiss.
his lips left yours, trailing hot kisses down your jaw and neck. seungcheol’s breath was warm against your skin, each kiss sending shivers down your spine. "cheol-ie," you breathed out, your voice shaky with desire. "i’ve needed you so bad.”
he groaned against your neck, the sound vibrating through you and making your core tighten with need. "you have no idea how much I’ve wanted you babygirl,” he murmured, his voice rough with longing. the nickname makes you feel weak in his arms as they roam over your back, pulling you closer until there was no space left between you.
you began to move against him, grinding your hips down on his lap. the friction elicited a deep, guttural moan from his chest, his grip on your hair tightening. his lips continued their path along your neck, sucking and nibbling at the sensitive skin. each touch, each kiss, was driving you both closer to the edge.
your hands slid under his shirt, desperate to feel his skin against yours and see the body you’d thought about and fantasized about at the pool. his muscles tensed under your touch, and he let out another low groan. the sound sent a jolt of pleasure straight to your core, making you grind harder against him.
feeling the need for more, you reached for the hem of your top, and without hesitation, cheol’s hands followed suit, helping you remove the garment until it fell forgotten to the floor. his eyes drank in the sight before him, the intensity of his gaze sending a thrill through you. with a passion that matched your own, he leaned in to capture your lips in a feverish kiss, his movements urgent and commanding.
seungcheol’s hands moved to your breasts, his touch sending electric pulses of pleasure coursing through your body. his lips followed suit, trailing hot kisses down your neck and collarbone before finding their way to your exposed skin. the sensation of his warm mouth on your sensitive flesh made you gasp, a moan escaping your lips as you arched into his touch.
as he sucked and massaged your breasts with a hunger that bordered on desperation, you couldn't help but whine his name, the sound echoing in the room like a symphony of desire.
his only response was a deep, guttural groan, the sound vibrating through you.
cheol’s hands moved to your hips, guiding your movements and matching your rhythm. the sensation of his hardness pressing against you was intoxicating, heightening the desire coursing through your veins. “i need you," he whispered hoarsely against your neck, his breath hot and heavy.
you pulled back slightly, just enough to look into his eyes. the intensity you saw there took your breath away. "i need you too, cheol," you whispered back, your voice filled with the same raw need.
"show me," he commanded, his voice dropping to a low, authoritative tone. "show me how much you want me."
you bit your lip and your mind was urging you to shed the last remnants of clothing separating you from seungcheol’s touch. with a sense of urgency, you sat up, for just a moment to rid yourself of your pajama shorts and panties. he gently helped you slip out of the remainder of your clothes until you were completely bare in front of him.
as you returned to straddle him, seungcheol’s eyes darkened with possessiveness, his slightly dumbfounded gaze raking over your exposed form with undisguised lust. you reached for his hand, guiding it to where you needed him most.
his fingers moved in circles with a skill and reverence that bordered on worship. as he teased and caressed you with one hand, his other grabbed the back of your neck to pull you into his orbit.
"cheol," you gasped, your voice filled with need as his touch sent waves of pleasure crashing over you. "pl-please, want you inside of me..”
his response was a low, guttural growl, the sound sending shivers down your spine. he pressed his fingers against your throbbing center, the sensation driving you crazy, and leaned against your ear, “i know angel, i know, need to prep you.”
he slipped two long fingers inside you, his movements slow and deliberate. you couldn't help but arch impossibly back into his touch, a high pitched moan escaping your lips as he filled you completely. his fingers curled inside you and slipped in and out, stretching you and sending waves of pleasure over you that you could feel building closer and closer to your climax.
cheol pulled your face closer to his by your neck as he pumped his fingers in and out of you and whispered in his deep voice words of praise, “you’re so good for me.” his voice was rough in responsive to your obedience.
“such a good girl.”
the words sent a thrill through you, and your breathing that had gotten more quick by the second let all the air escape from your lungs as you completely gave in to the sensations in your body. you reached your peak screaming his name and collapsing onto the bed with your back. now on top of you, cheol guided you down from your high, and his movements became slower and more gentle until his fingers pulled out of you.
you felt his hand move to your lips, gently pressing against them. with a mix of hesitation and curiosity, you parted your lips, allowing cheol to guide his fingers inside your mouth so you could taste yourself.
“that’s it babygirl,” he said, a low groan escaping his lips. the sight of you, so willing and eager for his touch, only fueled the fire burning inside of him. he pulls his fingers from your mouth to press gentle kisses on your lips and your cheek - a sharp contrast from the intensity that had taken over him before.
as the passion of the moment continued to build, you couldn't help but notice the unmistakable hardness pressing against your thigh. seungcheol’s arousal was evident, his desire matching your own in its fervor. a surge of need washed over you, and you found yourself craving him in a way that was almost overwhelming.
desperation clawed at your insides, urging you to beg for him, to plead with him to take you in his arms and fuck you until you saw stars. but as you glanced into his eyes, you saw a flicker of uncertainty, a hint of fear lurking beneath the surface.
you reached for him, your fingers tracing the outline of his arousal through his pants. the intensity of his desire was palpable, sending a jolt of electricity coursing through you. you wanted him, needed him, in a way that bordered on obsession. but as you moved to undo his pants, you felt him hesitate, his hands shaking slightly. "i…i don’t know if i can," he whispered hoarsely, his voice filled with a sigh.
you whispered, your voice soft and filled with sincerity. "i want this, with you."
a flicker of relief flashed across his features, his shoulders relaxing slightly at your words. but the worry still lingered in his eyes, the fear of causing you pain evident in every line of his expression. he reached down to free his member from the confines of his sweatpants, discarding the clothing with a swift movement. as his length sprang free, you couldn't help but gasp at the sight before you. he was almost comically big, his arousal standing proudly against his abdomen, thick and pulsing with desire.
a mix of excitement and nervousness coursed through you as you watched him, desire pooling low in your belly. you couldn't help but wonder how he was going to fit inside of you, the thought sending a thrill of anticipation racing through you. seungcheol reached for his wallet on the nightstand, retrieving a condom with practiced ease and slipped it on.
cheol lifted your legs over his head, moving himself between them, a gasp escaped your lips at the sudden change in position. you felt him slowly enter you, his size stretching you in a way that was both exhilarating and slightly painful. the stretch stung, sending a jolt of sensation coursing through your body, but it was unlike anything you had ever felt before. he had to be the biggest you'd ever had, filling you completely and leaving you breathless with desire.
“‘s-so big,” was all you could breathe out with awe in your voice.
“you’re so fucking tight,” he murmured with both hands holding your legs over his shoulder so he could stretch you out as much as possible. bottoming out, he studied your face for signs of discomfort and deciding he could move. as seungcheol began to thrust gently at first, you felt his movements cautious and tender, as if he were testing the waters. each slow push and pull sent waves of pleasure rippling through you, his size stretching you in ways that ignited a fire deep within.
“feels so fucking good, your perfect pussy…” he groans into your neck.
you couldn't help but vocalize how good you felt as well, “don’t stop baby, please.”
something about that nickname makes his movements became more urgent, more desperate, as he surrendered himself to the pleasure of being inside you. with each thrust, you felt yourself being pushed closer and closer to the edge, the pleasure building to an almost unbearable crescendo. his thrusts became rougher, more dominant, as he took control of the rhythm. with a growl of desire, he reached for your throat, his grip firm but not constricting.
the sensation of his hand around your neck sent a shockwave of pleasure coursing through you, the combination of pleasure and pain driving you wild with desire. "who makes you feel this good?" he demanded, his voice rough with need.
you gasped at the sensation, the pleasure building to an almost unbearable peak. "you," you screamed, your voice filled with rawness. "It's you, cheol."
he flipped you over onto your hands and knees, positioning you perfectly for him to take you from behind. you gasped at the sudden change in position, the feeling of vulnerability and excitement coursing through you. but before you could react, seungcheol’s hands were on you, grabbing your ass possessively as he pulled you towards him. the sensation of his grip on your flesh sent a shiver of pleasure down your spine, curved for him to hit your perfect angle.
as you thought you couldn't take any more, you felt his hand tangle in your hair, pulling you back towards him with a force that left you breathless. “want you to be mine..” he choked out, his words claiming you.
“‘m yours," you gasped, your voice surrendering yourself completely. with a final, desperate thrust, cheol buried himself deep inside you, sending you both hurtling over the edge into ecstasy. pleasure exploded through every nerve ending in your body as you both reached the peak together, your cries of passion mingling in the air as you rode out the waves of bliss together.
seungcheol slowly withdrew from you and as you caught your breathe, he removed the condom, discarding it thoughtfully before turning his attention back to you. his demeanor shifted, his previous intensity giving way to a tender concern. leaning in, he pressed soft kisses to your tired face, his touch gentle and reassuring. "are you okay?" he whispered, his voice filled with genuine concern as he traced a soothing hand along your sweaty cheek.
you nodded, a contented smile gracing your lips as you bask in the warmth of his affection.
he tenderly cleaned you with a warm, damp cloth that he quickly fetched from the bathroom, his movements gentle and careful as he ensured tour comfort. once satisfied, he disposed of the cloth and returned to your side, pulling the covers over the both of your naked bodies.
you lay in each other's arms, the quiet of the room enveloping them like a comforting embrace. the air was filled with a sense of contentment but also questions rang through your mind. unable to contain your curiosity any longer, you spoke up. "cheol, earlier... did you mean what you said?" you asked, her voice tentative yet filled with hope.
seungcheol turned to you, his gaze soft yet filled with meaning. “every word," he replied, his voice steady and sure. “if you want — then you’re mine, and i’m yours.”
your mind buzzed with uncertainty and you sigh, snuggling closer to him. the realization that your time together on the show was fleeting weighed heavily on your heart, casting a shadow over the intimacy you had shared.
"seungcheol," you begin, switching from the nickname you’d been using. “i can’t help but wonder...after filming ends, what happens to us? we haven't known each other for long, and...” you gnawed at your lip, “what if we’re just caught in the moment?”
his expression faltered, a flicker of hurt flashing across his features at your words. he had been so certain of your connection, so confident in the depth of your feelings for each other, that your doubts came as a painful blow.
he reached out, his hand trembling slightly as he gently cupped your chin, guiding your gaze to meet his. "caught in the moment?" he repeated, his voice filled with an anxiety-ridden tone you had never heard before. "is that really what you think this is?"
your chest clenched at the anguish in seungcheol’s eyes, the weight of your words settling heavily between the two of you. you hadn't meant to hurt him, hadn't realized the impact your doubts would have on him.
"no, seungcheol, that's not what i meant," you hurried to explain, sitting up — your voice thick with regret. "i just... i’m scared. scared that what we have isn't enough to survive once the cameras stop rolling."
seungcheol sat up, shoulders slumped, the weight of your uncertainty pressing down on him like a boulder. "i need some time to think," he said, his voice strained. without another word, he stood up, dressed himself with the clothes he’d discarded on the floor as you protested, and left the room, the sound of the door closing behind him echoing through the silence.
you curled up under the covers, the emptiness of the room amplifying the loneliness you felt.
day 13:
the next morning dawned with a heavy sense of awkwardness hanging in the air. as you emerged from your room, the weight of last night’s conversation still pressed on your chest. cheol was already in the kitchen, his back turned to you as he prepared breakfast. the usual warmth and easy smiles were conspicuously absent.
"good morning," you said softly, trying to break the tension.
"morning," he replied flatly, not turning to face you. his tone was distant, a stark contrast to the intimate moments you had shared just hours before.
breakfast was a quiet affair, the silence between you filled with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. every clink of cutlery felt amplified, every glance avoided a reminder of the rift that had formed.
filming started shortly after, the crew bustling around to set up the day’s scenes. you and seungcheol went through the motions, but the chemistry that had once made your interactions effortless now felt forced. the cameras captured your strained smiles and awkward pauses, the tension between you palpable.
by the end of the day, the weight of the unspoken words and unresolved tension was nearly unbearable. as the crew packed up and the lights dimmed, you felt a deep sense of despair settle in. the connection that had once felt so strong now seemed fragile.
the newly familiar routine of brushing your teeth and changing into pajamas felt strangely hollow without seungcheol’s presence by your side. as you slipped under the covers, the cool sheets seemed to amplify the emptiness of the space beside you.
day 14:
the next day dawned with a sense of finality, the knowledge that it was the last day of filming adding a layer of bittersweet tension to the air. you went through your morning routine mechanically, each action feeling heavy with the weight of the unspoken words and unresolved emotions between you and your fake husband.
the filming started early, the crew bustling around to capture the last few scenes of your time together. you and seungcheol interacted politely, tension still lingering. you found yourself stealing glances at him, wishing for a moment alone to bridge the gap, but the demands of filming left little room for personal conversations. the day moved swiftly, and before you knew it, it was time for the post-show interview.
post-show interview:
you sat in the brightly lit room, the camera trained on you as the producer asked the final questions. the weight of the moment pressed on you, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady your nerves.
interviewer: "so, how do you feel now that the show is ending?”
her voice was gentle but probing.
you paused, considering your words carefully. "its been an amazing experience," you began, your voice trembling slightly. "i’ve learned so much about myself and about what i want in a relationship. and...i’ve come to care for seungcheol deeply. more than i expected."
the interviewer leaned in, sensing the depth of your emotions.
interviewer: “can you elaborate on that? how has your relationship with seungcheol evolved?"
you nodded, your heart pounding. "at first, it was just about getting to know each other, but as the days went by, i found myself feeling…a certain way about him. he’s kind, supportive, and has this way of making me feel seen and valued. i’ve realized that i fell for him and that my feelings were real.”
a pang of regret hit you, remembering your doubts and the hurt in cheol’s eyes. you wondered if you should share your feelings fully, fearing the consequences of the media. but then, you decided—if there was a chance that he would see this interview when the show aired, perhaps he would understand the depth of your feelings and know that you regretted your words.
“i’ve fallen for seungcheol," you confessed, your voice breaking slightly. "and i regret the doubts i voiced. i wish i could take them back. i hope... i hope he can see how much he means to me."
the interviewer smiled softly, sensing the raw emotion in your words and the scoop she had just gotten. “thank you for sharing that," she said gently. "it’s clear that this experience has been transformative for you."
the weeks after the show wrapped up were a whirlwind of activity as you dived back into your work. your agency had announced a comeback, and preparations were in full swing, leaving little time for anything else. yet, despite the hectic schedule, thoughts of seungcheol lingered in the back of your mind, a constant undercurrent to your busy days. you cherished the rare quiet moments in your dorm, where you could catch up with your girl friends or simply relax. even during these times, you found yourself checking your phone, hoping for a message from the person you longed for. as the days passed with no word, a sense of uncertainty grew, mingled with the hope that he would reach out once the show aired.
when the show finally did air, you watched your post-show interview with bated breath, wondering how seungcheol would react. the raw honesty of your confession, the vulnerability you had shown, left you feeling exposed but kept you waiting next to your phone.
then, the call came. hearing cheol’s voice, filled with emotion and understanding, was like a balm to your weary heart. his words of reconciliation and his desire to give your relationship a real chance were everything you had hoped for. the prospect of meeting him off-camera, to explore your connection without the pressures of the show, filled you with a renewed sense of excitement and somewhat worry.
the next day, you found yourself standing outside a small, cozy café, your heart racing with anticipation. the door opened, and there he was—your same old cheol, looking just as nervous and hopeful as you felt.
he smiled as he saw you, a genuine, heartfelt smile that made your heart flutter. "hey," he said softly, stepping closer.
"hey," you replied, your voice quiet and your eyes watery.
without another word, he pulled you into a hug, holding you close. the warmth of his embrace, the familiar scent of him, it all felt right.
you both sat down, ordering drinks and talking about everything and nothing. the conversation flowed easily, the tension from the show slowly melting away as you reconnected on a deeper, more personal level.
"i’ve been thinking about you every day," he confessed, his hand reaching out to cover yours. "i want to explore this, see where it leads. no cameras, no scripts—just us."
you nodded, tears of happiness glistening in your eyes. "i want that too, cheol. i want us to have a real chance."
as seungcheol and you left the café, a small crowd had gathered outside, eager to catch a glimpse of the two of you together. camera flashes illuminated the sidewalk as fan-sites and news networks alike snapped photos, their interest palpable in the air. reporters shouted questions, their voices blending into a cacophony of speculation about your relationship.
online, netizens dissected every detail, analyzing photos and videos from the show and your recent café outing. comments and posts flooded social media platforms, with hashtags trending worldwide. the public's curiosity and excitement seemed to know no bounds as they speculated about the nature of your relationship.
cheol took to his instagram, posting a photo of the two of you holding hands outside the café with a quote from “amour,” the novel he had read previously.
— “ there will come a time when you believe everything is finished; that will be the beginning. “
end.
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2K notes · View notes
wandaslittlebird · 18 days
Text
Confessing
Stepmom!Wanda x Pervy!GP!Reader
After months of spying on your stepmother, you’re finally caught and made to confess far more than you’d expected.
CW: Reader is displeased with her anatomy, non-consensual spying, underwear stealing and other nefarious acts, mentions of masturbation, stepmom/stepdaughter, intense questioning, dacryphilia (kinda), humiliation, spanking, mommy kink, accidental orgasm
Word Count: 4k
A/N: It’s finally complete! There’s going to be an alternative version of this fic with a non g!p reader soon! Wanda’s also a lot meaner in that one, so get excited if that’s your thing.
You stood in front of the bathroom mirror, still mostly naked from the long shower you’d just taken. You stood up on your tippy toes in order to highlight the main attraction: your new lacy thong underwear.
You’d stolen them from your stepmother Wanda's wardrobe earlier while she was busy making dinner. When you’d found them, you just knew you had to have them. It was the first time you’d ever stolen her panties to wear, and the act both scared and aroused you.
It was kind of her fault, really, that you had to steal her panties to wear. At least, that’s how you justified it to yourself. She always bought you the plainest and ugly boxer briefs.
“Pretty girls with penises can’t wear little panties like that,” she had told you when you asked to buy some panties. “You gotta wear some with a little more fabric to keep those princess parts all tucked into place.”
She was right, of course. Your “extra appendage” made even boyshorts unwearable. Perhaps you could make it work if you were a bit smaller. Alas, you’d been cursed to have a bigger dick than even most men had.
But you hated your boxers, regardless. Sure they kept your anatomy secure, but they never came in pink, or lace, or had any fun bows on the waistband. Even your favorite pair were just navy with blue dog silhouettes on them.
These panties, however, were so much better. They hugged your hips perfectly, creating a beautiful V shape that accentuated your shape. Sure there was still a bulge between your legs, but you thought it was made much less unsightly by the black lace it prodded. There was, of course, the issue of keeping it inside the panties. There was so little fabric it was bound to pop out at some point.
But for right now, you twisted happily on your toes, feeling sexy and pretty, just like Wanda was when she wore her pretty panties.
“Honey! Dinner’s ready!” You heard Wanda’s voice from the dining room.
You frowned, not ready to get dressed quite yet. Nonetheless, you shouted from the bathroom, “I’ll be down in a second!” before slipping on your plaid pajama pants and an old band t-shirt. It’s fine. You’d be nice and quick with dinner, then you could slip away to the privacy of your room for the rest of night. You had a better mirror in there anyway: a full body one that would solve this tip toe problem. Maybe you could even put on a bit of a fashion show for yourself, trying on all of your favorite bras and deciding which one made for the best set.
You took a deep breath, trying to mask your excitement. It was going to be a perfect night. All you had to do was make it through dinner first.
You walked nervously down the stairs into the dining room where you found Wanda dishing out pasta onto each of your plates. She offered you a gentle smile upon arrival. “Oh good, you made it. I was worried for a second there you’d make me eat alone. Just pasta tonight, nothing fancy. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Oh, uh, it’s no problem at all,’” you stammered. “Anything you make will surely be delicious.” You tried to offer her the same smile she’d offered you, but it came out awkward and uneven. It was clear you were nervous. You cursed yourself for your inability to hide your feelings from her.
She tilted her head in slight confusion. “Are you feeling alright? You look a little flushed.”
“I… uh… yeah I’m fine. I must’ve just taken a really hot shower,” you attempted to explain. She clearly wasn’t buying it. You shrank back in your chair a little bit, shifting uncomfortably as your dick threatened to escape its flimsy confines. The sensation only caused you to blush harder.
“Are you sure?” she asked, unconvinced. “Let me feel your head.” She leaned over the table, giving you a clear view down the front of her shirt. Fuck. She wasn’t wearing anything underneath her blouse. You inhaled shakily, shifting even more obviously as you felt yourself grow hard. You took in a sharp breath as you felt your dick pop out of the leg hole of the underwear.
She touched your head innocently with the back of her hand. Her brows furrowed in confusion as your uncomfortable wiggling became more pronounced. “Darling, you seem terribly restless. What’s going on?” She was starting to catch on, at least, to the fact you were keeping something from her. Though she couldn’t pinpoint what it was, she was certain she could get it out of you. You were never very good at keeping secrets, especially not from her.
You scooted your chair backwards, determined to escape this situation as quickly as possible. “I… uh… Actually I am feeling a bit poorly. I better go up to my room.” You made a move to try and get up, but she grabbed your wrist before you could escape.
You turned to face her and you were met with a glare that nearly made you crumble. She looked at you like she was looking into your soul, like she was some sort of omnipotent goddess that already knew every secret you’d ever tried to keep. “Honey,” she said, voice even and emotionless, “I think we need to have a talk.”
Tears welled up in your eyes as you collapsed back down into your seat. “I’m sorry, mommy,” you whispered tearfully. How could she possibly know? Did she see something by accident?
She smiled knowingly. She had you now. That poor little head of yours couldn’t come up with a lie right now no matter how hard you tried. She circled the table and squatted down next to your chair, squeezing your hand and soothingly rubbing your temple with her thumb. “It’s okay, baby. Mommy’s not mad. I just need you to tell me what happened, okay? It’s okay, you can tell mommy.”
You swallowed. So she didn’t know. If you played your cards right, you could still make it out of this. Subconsciously, you crossed your legs, squeezing them tightly together, trying to hide yourself from her. It was a painfully obvious move, but her soft voice and her hand on your head were making it so very hard to think clearly.
Wanda smirked and ran her hand up the side of your hip. Whatever you were hiding was somewhere in here. Surely it wasn’t just a boner that’d gotten you this worked up. She’d caught you with several in the past, but she’d never said anything. Maybe you blushed or scratched your arm, but you’d never been like this.
Her hand slid over the fabric of your baggy pajama pants. Oddly enough, she couldn’t feel the bulky fabric of your boxers under the pants. Your secret wasn’t just that you weren’t wearing underwear, was it? No. As her hand got further up your waist, she felt them. They weren’t boxers, but there was something there.
“Honey,” she said calmly. “What are you wearing under your pajamas?”
Your mouth went dry and you froze, unsure how to answer her question. You decided it was best to play dumb. “W-what do you mean? Underwear.”
“Oh come on now darling,” she said, voice soft but slightly perturbed. “You know what I’m talking about. Are you wearing your boxers right now?”
Your eyes darted around the room, avoiding her gaze at all cost. She wasn’t going to check if you lied, was she? You hesitantly nodded.
“Are you sure?” She asked, unconvinced. “Do you mind if I lift up your shirt so I can make sure?”
Your hands flew to your waist, pinning your shirt to your body. “I… uh… I don’t feel comfortable showing you my underwear.”
She pursed her lips, annoyed with your evasiveness. She had started to believe that her soft mommy act wasn’t going to cut it, if she really wanted you to confess. “Darling, I’ve seen you in your boxers countless times before. Why are you getting so bashful all the sudden?”
You curled up tighter. You knew she was on to you by this point, but the humiliation of revealing yourself was too much. “I just… I don’t wanna show you, okay?” Your bottom lip quivered, tears threatened to spill from your eyes.
Wanda stood up, pushing your chair back until it hit the wall. You gasped, looking up at her, frightened as she loomed over you menacingly. “Alright, darling. If you can’t be a good girl and tell mommy what’s going on, I’m going to have to pull you over my lap, push your pants down to your ankles, and spank you in whatever underwear you’re wearing, okay? So I’ll ask you one more time. Are. You. Wearing. Your. Boxers. Right. Now?”
Your eyes went wide. You could feel your heart pounding in your chest. Your entire body started to shake as you stared up at her, frozen. Her gaze was harsh now, face unmoving as she waited on an answer.
Finally the dam broke. A cry ripped from your throat and tears poured down your face. You crumbled to pieces underneath her. “No! I’m not wearing my underwear, I’m wearing yours! I’m sorry! I know I shouldn’t have done it. And I know I shouldn’t have lied! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” You sobbed.
She shrunk back down, squatting again on the floor in front of you. She could hardly hide the pleasure she got from watching you shake and sob underneath her. She took your hand in hers, wiping away your tears. “See, baby? That wasn’t so hard, was it?”
You melted into her hand. You were truly hers now. No more lying, no more games. No more thoughts in your precious little head aside from “do exactly what mommy tells you to do”. Any resistance you had had melted away.
“Can you tell mommy why you were wearing her panties, sweetheart?” She asked softly.
“I wanted to be pretty,” you cried weakly. “All I ever get to wear are gross, ugly boxers but I just wanted to be pretty like you.”
Wanda nodded in understanding. “You wanted to wear pretty panties like mommy, huh?”
You nodded. Your head was so jumbled it felt like the confessions were spilling out of you. “I see you through the door sometimes, when you’re getting dressed. You look so pretty with your matching bras and panties. And I just… I wanted to look like that too,” you confessed.
“You see me through the door?” She asked, noting how you had said ‘see’ rather than ‘watch’. “Do you spy on mommy while she’s naked? Do you watch me when I change my clothes?”
Your head lulled to the side. “No! …yes… sometimes.” You confessed, getting quieter with each statement.
She raised her eyebrows, surprised and amused by your unswerving honesty. She’d known, of course, about your little habits. You weren’t as sneaky as you thought. However, having you blubbering under her, confessing every little thing you’d ever done, brought her immense satisfaction.
She ran her hand up your upper thigh again, lightly tracing shapes with her fingers. “How long have you been spying on mommy, huh?”
You sighed, feeling yourself grow hard in your pants. Her touch was so memorizing you nearly forgot to answer the question. She pulled her hand away, grabbing your face and raising her eyebrows expectantly. You snapped out of your haze. “I don’t know! I don’t know how it started! Please! I promise I’m not a naughty girl!”
Her hand moved up to your hair, gently wiping it from her face. Her rapid switching from gentle to harsh was making your head spin. “It’s okay, sweetheart. Mommy’s not mad. You’re doing a very good job being honest with me.” She leaned forward, so close you could feel her breath against your ear. “How does it make you feel, watching me in my room like that? Watching me change my clothes and seeing my pretty lingerie?”
“G-good,” you answered hazily. “I just… I like to see, sometimes.”
She was slowly climbing up your body, almost in your lap now. “You just like to see sometimes, hmm?” She repeated. “Is that all?”
“Sometimes I-I like to… um… to-touch my… in the hallway while I watch,” you confessed, too scared and hazy to lie to her anymore.
A faint smile grew on her lips. She could hardly believe how vulnerable she’d made you. She’d never quite seen you like this before. “That’s quite naughty of you, darling. You can’t just touch yourself in the hallway like that. Someone could catch you, you know.”
“Dad almost… one time he saw… but he didn’t know what I was doing and I pretended I was waiting on you.”
She sat on your knees, rubbing soothing circles on your collarbones and shoulders. “Dad almost caught you, huh? And what were you doing, exactly?”
“Just… rubbing… on the outside. I didn’t have my h-hands in my pants or anything,” you stammered.
She leaned forward again, moving her hands down to your hips. “That was a very very naughty thing to do, little girl. I better not catch you rubbing yourself in the hallway again.”
You shook your head. “It will never happen again! I promise!”
She grabbed your face again, significantly softer now that she’d already broken you. She simply lifted your chin to look her in the eyes. “No more lying, darling. I want to know the truth. Are you going to stop spying on me?”
You nodded frantically, determined to never find yourself in this situation again. “Never! I swear!”
“Good girl,” she cooed. She gently rubbed your cheek with her thumb. “And no more stealing my underwear, agreed?”
You nodded again, driven to yet another confession you hadn’t planned on making. “No more! And no more stealing the dirty ones either. I won’t even snoop again! I promise!”
“Oh?” Wanda purred, “So you’ve been stealing my dirty panties too? Not just the clean ones?” Once again, she had been noticing her panties in your laundry instead of hers for months now. She was under no illusion that they were ending up there accidentally.
“This… this was the first time I stole any clean ones! I’ve never worn them before either!” You defended.
She hummed softly, pretending to ponder your confession. “Hmm. And what, exactly, do you do with my dirty panties?”
“I just… smell,” you confessed. “Some I use them to… t-touch myself with.”
“You use them when you touch yourself?” She asked, her voice still gentle and sweet. She ran her hands through your hair with an air of possession.
You nodded. “One time I had… I had a taste. But just one time!”
She chuckled smugly. “Oh?” She smirked down at you. “You took a taste, huh? Just once?”
You nodded. You were so terribly embarrassed. You wanted to throw yourself into her and beg her for forgiveness, but you doubted it would help.
“And how did I taste, darling?” She asked.
You moaned a little at the memory, hips bucking up as you felt yourself grow harder. “Really g-good. I’d never… finished that much before.”
“Aww,” she chuckled again. “Did you cum really hard when you tasted mommy?”
You nodded. Her hands traced light patterns on your hips, making their way to your stomach. “Just from a little taste?” She asked again, egging you on for more details.
“I didn’t even have to… touch myself. It just… happened all on its own,” you said. The tip of your cock was pressing hard against the fabric of your pajama pants now. The outline was painfully clear now that your underwear was no longer covering it. Wanda looked down at your lap and smirked smugly.
“It looks like maybe you enjoyed it, huh? Cumming from mommy’s taste alone?” She lightly traced the waistband of your pants, getting close but not quite touching the bulge in the fabric.
You whimpered and bucked your hips up, trying to get her hand closer to where you needed it. “Y-yeah. I didn’t know it could… happen like that. I thought you had to… touch it.”
Wanda hummed, pondering your words. “Most little princesses do. But you're a very special little princess, aren’t you?”
You nodded, still sniffling. The whole ordeal had you beyond embarrassed, yet you noticed that your arousal persisted through the embarrassment. Perhaps it was even worsened by it.
“Can-can I go to my room?” You stuttered suddenly. You had to get out of here, to somewhere more private before your humiliation and arousal bubbled over.
“Aww, sweetheart,” she cooed with fake sympathy. “Did you really think after all of this I would just let you go to your room?”
Your eyes went wide with terror. You weren’t sure how much more of this you could take before disaster struck. “B-but you said you weren’t mad!”
“I’m not mad, honey,” she reassured. “But what you did was very very naughty, wasn’t it?”
You nodded, another wave of tears threatening to fall.
“And when little girls do naughty things they have to be punished, don’t they?” She said, affectionately combing through your hair.
You nodded again, whimpering under her gentle touch. “But you’ll go easy on me, right? Because I was a good girl and I was honest and I told you everything?”
She chuckled. Your description wasn’t exactly accurate, but she couldn’t help but take at least a little pity on you. You had confessed in the end, even if it took a little pushing. “Of course, baby,” she soothed. “Now go upstairs and wait for mommy. I want you over the end of the bed in nothing but mommy’s panties, okay?”
You nodded frantically, running up the stairs and assuming the position as soon as she got off your lap.
She chuckled, amused by your eager obedience, and boxed up the pasta she’d made so she could easily heat it back up after this was over.
It only took her about five minutes for her to finally come upstairs, but to you, bent naked over the edge of the bed, it felt like hours.
You had to fight to keep your head down on the mattress when you heard her open the bedroom door. You whined as you watched her pull the wooden hairbrush from her nightstand. “No mommy! Please not the hairbrush! Please I was so honest and-and I answered all of your questions-“
She cut you off by rubbing gentle circles on the swell of your ass. “Shshsh,” she soothed. “Mommy’s only doing this because she loves you, okay? I have to remind my sweet girl what happens when she’s naughty so she’ll remember to be a good girl, right?”
You whimpered and squirmed under her, trying to be patient and still but also desperate to get away from the hairbrush. The thin fabric of the underwear offered you little to no protection, and your now hard dick was no longer restrained by the fabric.
“I want you to count for me, okay?” She instructed. “If you can keep count like a good girl, we’ll only do 15, but if I have to count for you, I’m gonna have to do 25, okay?”
You nodded, determined to be good and keep count. However, you weren’t traditionally known for keeping a clear head during your punishment. “Can-can I hold onto a pillow, please?”
She couldn’t see your face, but the tears in your voice made it hard for her to deny you anything. “Of course, baby,” she said, pulling a pillow from the headboard and tucking it into your arms. She kissed the side of your teary face. “Mommy loves you very much, princess. It’ll be over soon.”
She tapped your ass twice with the hairbrush before placing the first smack firmly on your left cheek. You cried out, wailing more with overwhelming embarrassment than pain.
“One!”
She hit you again with perfect precision in almost the exact same spot.
“T-two”
She switched sides, smacking you again on the other cheek.
“Three!”
You made it to seven before you inevitably lost count. She waited for a moment after the strike before she decided your wailing was not going to give way to a number, and she officially started counting herself.
By ten, you had resorted to begging. You knew better than to flail and kick your legs, she’d have you pinned over her lap with a far worse punishment in store, but you were allowed to cry and plead all you wanted. “Please mommy! Please, I'll be good. I learned my lesson mommy please no more!”
You sounded so pathetic she was almost tempted to have mercy on you. You weren’t even halfway through your punishment now that she’d pushed it to 25. But she would stick to her word. That was, after all, what was most important when it came to discipline.
It wasn’t even so much the pain, you were trying to escape, but something far more alarming that boiled in your lower belly. Having her, a commanding force over you, was awakening something in you. The humiliation of a confession matched with wearing her underwear and being spanked like a child over her bed had a coil building in your lower stomach.
By 15 spanks, you realized it was inevitable. You were pleading with her more quietly now. Your hips bucked against the bed in what she thought was an attempt to get away, but by the 20th spank the coil snapped. In a humiliating display of desperation, you came, spilling your seed on the sheets.
She stopped spanking you, taking a second to realize what just happened. “Did you just…?”
You wailed into the pillow, burying your face into it until it nearly suffocated you. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry mommy I didn’t mean to! I’ll clean it up! I promise! Please no more spankings mommy! Please, I'll be a good girl!”
She rubbed soothing circles on your lower back, genuinely trying to calm you enough to talk. As much as she wanted to stay true to her word and finish your punishment, making sure you didn’t suffocate yourself was a higher priority.
“It’s okay honey. You’re okay. Accidents happen,” she comforted. She was more amused than anything by the situation. However, she feared if she busted out in laughter, you’d keel over right then and there.
“No it’s not!” You sobbed. “I just came on your bed while I was getting punished for being naughty and dirty already!”
“It’s okay, baby. Mommy understands. You didn’t mean to make a mess of mommy’s bed, did you?” She asked in her most soothing voice, one she might use if she were talking to a small child.
You shook your head into the pillow. “I really really didn’t mean to. Please don’t punish me!”
Wanda cooed, rubbing your heaving back. “You’re not in trouble, baby. You’re never gonna be in trouble for something you did by accident. You just made a little mess, darling. No need for tears.”
She sat down next to you on the bed, dragging you onto her lap. She could almost laugh at how pathetic you looked, all snotty and sobbing, still mostly naked as she sat you up on her lap. Despite it all, she thought you looked absolutely darling.
“Are you a little embarrassed, princess?” She asked as you refused to let go of the pillow you had practically burrowed into.
You nodded, remaining completely unwilling to look at her. She grabbed a sheet off the bed and wrapped it around you, hoping being less naked would lure you out of hiding. “You don’t have to be embarrassed, baby,” she reassured. “Mommy understands. You're not in trouble, sweet girl.” She rubbed your back through the sheet, rocking you in her lap.
After a few moments of silence she kissed your head and said “I’m gonna put you on the couch while I clean up your little mess and then you can sleep in mommy’s room tonight. Does that sound good, princess? Do you wanna stay with mommy tonight?”
Finally, you discarded your pillow, allowing her to see your teary face. You nodded. “I wanna stay in mommy's room.”
She smiled, kissing you once on the forehead. “I’d love that, darling. You can keep me nice and warm all night long.”
541 notes · View notes
hotvintagepoll · 8 months
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Propaganda
Cary Grant (The Philadelphia Story, His Girl Friday, Bringing Up Baby, Charade)—just the peak of old-school Hollywood sexuality. The glam, the suits, the gentle wit, the acrobatics, those eyes that always looked like they knew exactly what movie they were in and were laughing at the joke...
Vincent Price (Laura, Leave Her to Heaven, House on Haunted Hill, The Masque of the Red Death)—svelte, stylish, horrifying, beautiful, wickedly funny, camp and gorgeous and evil. he was an art connoisseur who advocated passionately indigenous art, he was an actual literal gourmet cook, he was so liberal he got greylisted during the mccarthy era for being too rad, he's my favorite muppets guest of all time
This is round 4 of the bracket. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage man.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Vincent Price propaganda:
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Cary Grant propaganda:
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"My Golden Age of Hollywood professor, who was very outwardly gay himself, put it this way: Even though Grant's sexuality was kind of an open secret in Hollywood, the public couldn't know in any real way. But anybody could see that there was a queerness about him, so he was casted for roles where he physically embodies his masculinity in a non-explicit but queer way. Bringing Up Baby is famous for the scene where Grant wears a frilly robe (pictured below, but what people don't always realise is that he plays kind of an awkward nerd in that movie. He's a hot awkward scientist in a grand robe!!! Hot!!! In The Philadelphia Story, one of my famous movies of all time, he plays C. K. Dexter Haven, a rich, sarcastic, supposedly abusive guy. And yet, what we see is this laid back, dandy-ish figure, who absolutely does not feel threatened when a woman he supposedly loves (Katharine Hepburn) starts having feelings for, and hooks up with another guy (James Stewart). He lets a drunk Stewart into his office and helps him get his job back! Obviously that is the script and not the actor, but the whole film, and that scene in particular, shows him having this very queer attitude of openness toward Hepburn and Stewart, which is only amplified by the casting of Grant and his portrayal of the character. Anyway, this is not an essay arguing for The Philadelphia Story to be considered a queer film, all I will say is: he's super hot in it."
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The link to the above mentioned frilly robe scene from Bringing Up Baby: "I just went gay all of a sudden!"
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last minute cary grant propaganda: the last few paragraphs of that new vanity fair article about him and randolph scott that just came out 2 days ago on cary's birthday where he calls it "gravity collapse" and "love at first sight" and says their souls touched and and and i'm actually sharing this mostly because it makes me emotional but also because a vote for archibald is a vote for love. this is my message. apologies for sounding mildly insane.
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thinkingotherwise · 4 months
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can i request umemiya and reader that they are a couple and since he is like the guys big brother she would be like his big sister? ugh, umemiya is so handsome, gentle, sexy, i love him, i fell in love, i need more content about our number 1.
Umemiya making our expectations for partners way too high. The man seems too perfect.
Hajime Umemiya and his girlfriend being the older siblings or maybe something else to Bofurin members
I think that some Bofurin members give off the youngest sibling energy. Guess who?
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You loved Hajime, not only because he was smokin' hot and very charming, even though you loved it as well, but also because of his kindness, the playfulness he showed to everybody, and the attentiveness to, as well as, care about others. He just seemed so perfect and you always told him how lucky you felt to be with him.
As time passed and you spent more and more of it with your ideal man and Bofurin, you also got used to them and the unique relationship they shared. They even started calling you their big sister, as Hajime would usually name himself the big bro, and what other name could they call the girlfriend of their leader?
Honestly, you'd need to be the harsher of you two because your boyfriend was just too soft and playful. He'd pamper the "kids", as he did with the first years, and encourage them to use their youth however they want. You, at the same time, were the voice of reason, trying to keep the Bofurin members under control, as the chaos they could sometimes create was a little too much.
When there was trouble and Bofurin was involved, however, Hajime would become a very protective and firm "older brother". A person you can depend on and leave all your troubles to, and you, as his partner, were responsible for keeping him at bay and not letting him get hurt too much.
The family-like relationship between you, your boyfriend, and other members of the school didn't prevent you from the arguments that arose, thankfully, very rarely.
While you were having a heated conversation with Hajime, the present Bofurin students, who observed it would try to ease you up.
The best ones at that were the first years, because of their awkward, yet playful comments that just made you stop and look at them not believing the words that left their mouths.
"You two always argue like an old married couple." Suou commented loud enough so you could hear him and stop your argument.
It did work and you turned to him but he was far from done and continued with a wide grin on his face.
"Do you plan to adopt all of us in the future, I think some wouldn't mind it."
"The parents are arguing again, what shall we do?" Kiryu joined in on the fun.
You felt your heart beating faster at their teasing getting easily flustered. In the hopes of stopping that your gaze moved to Hajime, who wore a matching grin like the first years, already forgetting about the argument he had with you.
"Well, I wouldn't mind marrying her one day. I'm sure (Y/n) would make a great wife." He commented smiling lovingly at you already imagining the life he could have with you.
"You're getting married?!" Sakura asked loudly getting the attention of other Bofurin members nearby.
That included Hiiragi, who the moment those words left the first year's mouth bent in half feeling the ache in his stomach coming back. He had enough of their shenanigans and slowly walked away to sit somewhere else and calm down.
As well as, Sugishita, who turned with wide eyes to look at the leader in betrayal. How could he not tell him that he was getting married, before telling Sakura?
The whole misunderstanding made you embarrassed and when you saw how much joy it brought Hajime you smacked his arm repeatedly trying to unload the feeling on him. He just laughed loudly and embraced you keeping you close to him.
"Stop it, it's not funny. Sakura, Kiryuu, and Suou you're in so much trouble when I get you!" You called to them trying to push away from the tight embrace but it was impossible.
"Well, hopefully, one day she'll be Umemiya." Hajime said and looked at you with his big loving eyes and you just couldn't take it.
You scrunched your face before hiding it in his shoulder and slapping his biceps twice. You gave in to your fate letting him hug you and shower in love.
Tags: @misticbullet
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0cta9on · 8 months
Text
Good Idea
length: 1.6k+ words
Genre: smut
Itzy Chaeryeong x Male Reader
(Author’s Note: Typing this on my phone was a hassle, so apologies if the quality isn’t that great. Enjoy anyways :) )
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【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★
PLAYER TWO WINS
Your friend Chaeryeong throws her hands up to celebrate her victory while you slump deeper into the couch, the bitter sting of your 10th defeat in a row filling your mind.
“Get owned, los-“ Chaeryeong begins to taunt you, but stops as she notices your upset expression. She scoots closer to you, offering you an apologetic look. “Sorry, did I upset you?”
You lightly chuckle at her reaction and shake your head. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Chaeryeong.”
“Then what’s wrong, oppa?” She asks, looking up at you expectantly with her big, round eyes. You sigh as you recount the details of your failed date. A couple weeks ago, Chaeryeong recommended you to try a dating app after expressing to her that you wanted to meet someone new. She helped you set up your profile, and after a while of getting left on read, you finally managed to secure a date with a girl who you thought was cute and fun to talk to. Things were going great… Until your first date with her. Your lack of dating experience in the past few years turned you into an awkward, blubbering mess in front of her. It didn’t help that you decided to order the spiciest item on the menu that basically killed any chance you had of salvaging your date (and your taste buds).
Chaeryeong gently rubs your arm as you sink lower into the couch, accepting the fact that you’ll probably die alone.
“I’m sorry, oppa. Is there something I can do to cheer you up?”
“I don’t think there is.” You let out a deep sigh and stare at the ceiling, lost in thought. Maybe dying alone wouldn’t be so bad. It’s not like you haven’t gotten used to being alone by now.
“Um…” Chaeryeong anxiously bites her lip as she turns to look at you. “Do you wanna try touching my boobs?”
Your head jerks up as your eyes widen in shock. “W-what did you just say?”
“I read somewhere on the internet that guys like touching boobs.” Her wide innocent eyes stare back at you without a single thought behind them. Chaeryeong had a habit of blurting out strange things, but this is by far the most insane thing she has ever said.
“I-I mean, you’re not wrong, b-but…” You were at a complete loss of words by her proposition, but you couldn’t help scan your eyes down her body. Her white ruffled tank top accentuated her breasts while also showcasing her tiny waist and sexy abs she achieved from years of being a dancer. Paired with her skin tight jeans that emphasized her curvy ass and thighs, you almost humored the idea of running your hands all over her body.
“W-why? Just why?” you ask, confused yet slightly turned on.
“Because you’re my friend and I don’t like seeing you so upset,” she responded with a pout on her lip and puppy dog eyes. It was practically impossible to say no to her whenever she made that face. With a sigh, you end up giving in.
“O-okay okay, fine. Just… You offered this, so no telling anyone I did anything weird, alright?” Beneath your apprehension, your heart was pounding with excitement. Not getting any action for years made you go feral at the simple thought of copping a feel.
A smile grows on Chaeryeong’s face as she giggles with elation. “Okay!” She sits on your lap, her ass pushing against your crotch. “Don’t be shy, oppa,” Chaeryeong teases as she grabs your wrists, placing your hands on her ample chest covered by her top. You instinctively squeeze her breasts, eliciting a cute moan from her lips. Almost instantly, your cock begins to strain in your pants, smushed against Chaeryeong’s ass, as your primal urges begin to take over.
“Looks like someone is excit- MMM!!” Chaeryeong’s words are interrupted by your mouth kissing on the supple skin of her neck. All of your inhibitions fade from your body, every action driven solely by hunger. You couldn’t deny how sexy your friend was as she succumbed to your every move. Each squeeze of her chest, each nibble of her ear, each lick on her neck turned her body into putty, completely malleable in your hands. This became evident in how you are able to lift her top without resistance, exposing her braless tits.
Chaeryeong’s mounds were absolutely perfect in your palms, soft yet firm and perfectly round. Paired with her toned abs, you couldn’t believe how lucky you were to be able to rub your hands all over her amazing body.
“D-do you- ah! Do you feel b-better, o-oppa?” Chaeryeong asked in between moans. You couldn’t help but chuckle at her adorable innocence as if she wasn’t being completely violated by you.
“Yes, I feel a lot better. I want you to feel better too,” you whisper into her ear in a sultry tone as your hand traces down her torso, causing her body to shiver in response. Chaeryeong giggles at your touch, biting her lip as she looks at you with complete lust in her eyes. You slowly unbutton her jeans, making sure she was watching. Her beautiful chest begins to rise and fall with heavy, anticipatory breaths. The urge to completely ruin your best friend was ever present in your mind, but you wanted to take things slowly. Savor every second of this experience.
Chaeryeong, on the other hand, was growing steadily impatient. “Oppa~” she whined, pouting her lips at you.
“So needy,” you chuckle before grabbing her chin and kissing her lips. She immediately melts into the delicate kiss as your fingers play with the hem of her panties. Slowly, you inch your hand closer to her wetness, teasing her skin with each scrape of your fingernails. Chaeryeong lightly moans into your mouth, her body shivering with pleasure. You graze her clit, causing her body to jolt from the contact.
“O-oh my g-god…” she groans, giggling with delight. You grab Chaeryeong’s chin with your free hand, watching her expression change as you plunge your middle finger deep into her pussy. Her mouth gapes open as she lets out a deep guttural moan, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. With your libido at an all time high, your mouth latches onto her neck as you insert a second finger into her heat, plunging your digits in and out of her until your hand starts to cramp.
“F-f-f-f-fuckkk!!!” Chaeryeong’s squeals, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. The walls of her pussy squeezed against your fingers as she came, staining her pants and your hand with her nectar. Her body suddenly goes limp as the high from her orgasm leaves her breathless.
“You okay, Chaeryeong?” you ask, smirking at her.
“Y-yeah… I feel… amazing…” She lazily plants kisses on your cheek in gratitude. This experience was definitely unforgettable - but you weren’t done yet. At this point, it was impossible to ignore your raging hardon, especially when Chaeryeong’s ass was rubbing all over it.
Standing up, you gently lay her down on the couch. She watched you, biting her lip, as you stripped her of her jeans and her soaked panties, leaving her bottom half completely nude. Her fit body was glistening with sweat and her sweet juices.
“Please take me already, oppa. I’m all yours,” Chaeryeong said, winking at you with a naughty grin. Without hesitation, you strip your clothes off, leaving them in a messy pile on the other side of the room. Your heart pounded with anticipation and lust as you lined up your cock with your best friend’s wet hole.
Church bells ring in your head as you slowly insert the tip of your penis into her. Chaeryeong’s body was complete perfection, both inside and out. A wave of ecstasy flows through you as her walls squeeze your member. You lean forward, catching Chaeryeong’s tit in your mouth as you continue to push through. Her cute moans fill the room, music to your ears.
“Mmm!! F-fuck… so b-big, oppa…” Her words were confirmation enough for you to start thrusting your hips into her. You start nice and slow, taking out most of your cock before plunging it back inside her heat. The jiggle of her breasts as you fucked her was mesmerizing.
Suddenly, she grabbed your face, forcing you to look at her. “F-faster… p-please, oppa,” she pleads, her wide eyes practically begging you to ruin her. You smirk, planting a gentle kiss on her lips before grabbing her hips and pounding her cunt with your hard dick. The rest of the world faded around you as you went rampant with pleasure. Pressure began to build in your loins, a sign of your impending orgasm. With the last of your strength, you slammed Chaeryeong down onto your cock, forcing her to match the rhythm of your thrusts.
Sensing your orgasm, Chaeryeong wraps her legs around your waist. “C-cum inside me, oppa. I-It’s okay.” With one final thrust, you went over the edge. Chaeryeong’s sweet pussy milked your cock completely dry. You collapsed back onto the couch, drained of all your energy.
“H-holy fuck… that was incredible,” you commented as you caught your breath. Chaeryeong snuggled up against you, smiling.
“I’m glad I could make you feel better, oppa.”
You couldn’t help but pepper her cute face with kisses. “If you’re gonna do this every time I’m sad, then I should go on failed dates more often,” you joked, earning a chuckle from her.
“Orrrrr, you could just go on a successful date with me and fuck me anyways,” she suggested, giggling as she bit her lip.
“I think I like your idea better.” With one final kiss, the two of you doze off in each other’s arms.
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xomakara · 2 months
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Love In Turbulence
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(re-posting from my old account seulrinnie-rinrin/xomakara-secondary)
SUMMARY | You're the maid of honor in your best friend's destination wedding, but you are single and feeling depressed about having to attend solo. Stressed and grumpy on the long flight there, you have a few too many drinks and pass out, drooling on the shoulder of your seatmate. When you arrive at the wedding, you are mortified to discover that your handsome seatmate is Yunho, the best man, and you spend the rest of the wedding weekend trying to avoid him. PAIRING | Yunho x Reader GENRE | non-idol!Yunho, wedding season yo, smut with no (maybe a little) plot, unprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!), vaginal sex, oral sex RATING | Mature, 18+, NSFW, MDNI LENGTH | 4,144 words TAGLIST | -- NETWORKS | AUTHOR’S NOTE | I got invited to a wedding next year and was kind of, somewhat inspired to write this lol. I think it feels a bit rushed hahaha. Enjoy!
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"Jina!" You yanked your best friend, the bride, into the bathroom and locked the door before anyone else came in.
"Are you okay?"
"No! Why didn't I know that we were sitting together?!" You asked her.
She looked at you with a confused look. "Huh?"
"Me and Yunho!" You explained.
"Of course you're sitting at the same table with Yunho. He's Yeosang's best man, just like you’re my maid of honor." She said it as if it made sense to her, but she couldn't figure out why you weren't making any sense either.
"Jina, he's the man I told you that I drooled all over on the plane." You told her the whole story, starting from when you started feeling depressed from being single during take-off, to having one too many drinks and until you woke up later on to find yourself face down on Yunho's shoulder, drooling.
"Oh my god." Jina covered her mouth with her hand. "Oh my god."
She kept repeating herself over and over again while you finished your story. When you were done, Jina leaned against the sink counter and looked at you with wide eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"How was I supposed to know that he was Yeosang's best man?" You groaned. "He's the only one of Yeosang's friends that I haven't met yet."
"So? Who cares? Do you think Yunho will be mad that you drooled on him? If anything he'll probably be flattered."
You rolled your eyes. "There's no way he'll be flattered. Who would be flattered by someone drooling all over them?"
"And you're worried about what he thinks about you? Seriously Y/N, this isn't high school where everyone has the same circle of friends. People come here for weddings alone. You need to start meeting new people or you're going to end up an old maid at this rate." Jina scolded you. "Look, go talk to him."
"I can't do that!" You protested. "I've been running away from him ever since the reception started."
"Why? Because he looks good in a suit? Or maybe because he smells really nice and his voice makes you shiver every time you hear him speak?" Jina teased. "Come on Y/N, don't make this harder than it already is. Talk to him and get this awkward moment over with. I know Yunho. He won't think you're weird, so don't worry about that."
You sighed. "Fine."
After straightening yourself out and silently cursing Jina for making you wear this sexy cocktail dress, you headed towards the table where Yunho sat with the rest of the wedding party. Okay, you had to admit that he was stupidly, insanely hot in a suit. And you also knew that his smoky brown eyes would have caught the attention of most women around him. However, none of that mattered right now. All that mattered was getting past this first conversation with him and praying that it would go smoothly.
When you reached the table, you realized that the only empty seats were beside Yunho, so you went to sit down next to him without even thinking twice about it. As soon as your butt hit the chair, you noticed that Yunho slowly turned his head to face you. You gulped nervously and looked away quickly. This was not happening. Not after everything that happened on the plane. It was too soon. You had to get out of here. Now.
But then, before you could make a move, Yunho moved closer to you and leaned forward to place his left arm around the back of your chair. Your heart skipped a beat and you felt your cheeks burning bright red under his intense stare.
What did you say? What did you say?! But then, before you could figure out how to escape this situation, Yunho spoke. "If you're worried about what happened on the plane, don't worry about it."
His voice was smooth and silky like silk. It was almost hypnotic. The last thing you wanted to do was fall under his spell. "Okay," you replied and slowly turned your head to face him. "Thanks."
Yunho nodded and smiled slightly. His eyes scanned your body, lingering on certain parts of you. "You look really beautiful tonight."
You blinked a few times, dumbfounded by his compliment. You stared back at him and realized that he still hadn't let go of your chair. Oh god.
"Are you alright?" He asked you.
"I'm still mentally embarrassed about the whole plane incident." You said sheepishly.
"Don't worry about it." Yunho assured you. "Besides, you looked cute sleeping on my shoulder."
"Even with all the drool?" You frowned.
"Yes." Yunho confirmed. "You looked very pretty. Even with all the drool."
The corner of your lips twitched up and you realized that you actually liked hearing those words from him. So you decided to take the conversation further. "Well...I didn't know you were the best man until I saw you standing next to Yeosang earlier today. As soon as I saw you, I wanted to avoid you at all costs."
“Well if it makes you feel better, I didn’t know you were the maid of honor until a few hours ago.” Yunho laughed. “It all makes sense why you kept running when someone tried to introduce us to each other. What made you change your mind?"
"The bride." You mumbled.
Yunho laughed and you couldn't help but smile at his cute chuckle. Damn, he had such a gorgeous laugh. You could listen to it forever.
"I'm sure Jina told Yeosang because they look like they're staring at us nonstop." Yunho said, nudging you gently. "But hey, I'm glad you changed your mind and talked to me. I'm really glad to finally meet you."
Your stomach suddenly churned and butterflies started fluttering inside your chest. Even though you just officially met Yunho a few minutes ago, you were strangely attracted to him. How strange was that? You always thought of yourself as a hopeless romantic, but the feeling that you were currently experiencing right now was something entirely different. And it scared you more than anything.
"Do you want to dance?" Yunho asked, getiing up from his seat.
"And give the newlyweds even more ammo to tease us?" You asked him.
Yunho gave you a soft smile. "It's fine if you don't want to dance with me."
"But I DO want to dance with you." You countered. "I promise I won't make a fool of myself."
"Then come on." Yunho grabbed your hand and pulled you up from your chair. "Let's dance."
You knew he was tall. But you didn't think he was this tall. Sure, you were wearing like four inch heels, but he still towered over you like an oak tree. And when he wrapped his strong arms around your waist, your knees felt weak and shaky. The entire time you were walking, your heart raced faster than ever before. What the hell was wrong with you? How was it possible for someone to make you feel this way within seconds of meeting them?
The dance floor was filled with people of all ages. An upbeat song played in the background, filling the room with music and laughter. You smiled as you watched Jina and Yeosang dancing. They looked so happy. You noticed Seonghwa, Mingi and Jongho, three of the groomsmen, dancing in a corner while the other groomsmen and bridesmaids laughed.
He was so close to you. You could feel Yunho's warmth radiating from his body, causing goosebumps to form all over your skin. Every movement that he made was like poetry to your ears. Every breath he took sounded so perfect. You closed your eyes and listened to his voice wash over you. For a second, you forgot who you were, what you were doing, and who you were talking to. Everything just faded away except for Yunho and his amazing presence.
As the music slowed down and into a romantic melody, Yunho moved his hands closer to your body and slid his right hand around your lower back. You sucked in a sharp breath and pressed yourself against him, enjoying the sensation of his hard muscles against yours. Your heart pounded rapidly and the entire world disappeared except for the two of you. You were falling. Falling into this incredible dream.
"Is this alright?" Yunho whispered into your ear.
"More than alright." You breathed out, still clinging onto him for dear life. "Perfect."
He continued to hold you in his arms, swaying to the tune of the song. His hand stayed low on your back while his other hand held onto your wrist. He never let go of you.
After dancing with Yunho for a while, you excused yourself to use the restroom. On your way to the bathroom, you ran into Jina who was heading towards the restrooms as well. She stopped short and looked at you with a wide grin.
"So...looks like you and Yunho are hitting it off." She teased. "I don't even know why you were so freaked out about him earlier."
You let out a laugh and hugged her. "Thank you, Jina. For pushing me to go talk to him."
"Y/N, you're my best friend. Of course I'm going to push you to do things you're afraid of." Jina explained. "I want you to be just as happy as I am. So I know you two officially just met but what do you think of him? Yeosang and I were saying earlier that you two looked cute together."
"I don't know why..." You bit your bottom lip. "But I'm having all these weird feelings that I've never had with other guys before. Like...a sense of...home."
Jina smiled. "That's good, Y/N. Trust your gut. If something feels right, it probably is. And besides, who says you need to rush things? You should be able to enjoy this special time in your life."
"Yeah, but this isn't supposed to happen." You complained. "How does someone fall in love so fast?"
"They don't." Jina shrugged. "You just meet the person that you're meant to be with and things fall into place naturally."
You let out a small sigh and turned around to walk towards the restroom. "I never asked but did you feel this way about Yeosang?"
Jina laughed. "When I first laid eyes on Yeosang, I knew I was going to marry that man."
You stopped and turned around again. "Really?"
"Oh yeah." Jina grinned widely. "I knew we were meant to be together since the day I met him."
You smiled as well. "Wow. That's awesome."
"Now you understand what I mean about trusting your gut, right?" Jina said, clapping you on the back.
You glanced at her out of the corner of your eye and nodded. "Yeah, I think I get it."
Before you entered the restroom, Jina leaned in close and whispered into your ear, "You'll find him too, Y/N. Don't lose hope."
Once you finished using the restroom, you headed back to where you and Yunho were sitting. He let out a smile when he saw you coming. Your eyes lingered on his lips for a brief moment and then snapped back up to his face. "Did you get lost?" He asked you.
"No." You shook your head and sat down next to him. "I ran into Jina and we talked for a bit."
Yunho laughed. "Let me guess. She asked about us."
"Yep." You replied. "She said that we looked cute together."
"And do you think we look cute together?" He asked, cocking his head at you.
"A little too early to tell." You let out a laugh. "But I'd like to keep this momentum going. Only if you want to, though."
"Of course I want to keep this momentum going." Yunho replied and let out a laugh. "I'm a fan of momentum."
Before you knew it, you found yourself holding his hand. Not because you were drunk or high, but because you genuinely wanted to. Maybe he did awaken a dormant desire deep inside you, or maybe you just wanted to have fun with a cute boy and this was the best opportunity to do so. Whatever the reason was, you were completely okay with it. And surprisingly enough, neither of you let go of each other's hand.
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"Mmmm..." You let out a small moan of satisfaction as you snuggled close to Yunho's body.
The air conditioner hummed softly and the windows were tightly shut, blocking out any noise from outside. There wasn't a lot of light in the room; the only source of light came from the moonlight shining through the window. But that wasn't what caught your attention. It was the warmth of his body that surrounded you that caused goosebumps to appear on your skin. You reached out to touch his shoulder and his arm tightened around your waist, preventing you from moving further. He shifted slightly to turn you on your side, wrapping his arm around your body and pulling you closer.
It had been months since Jina's and Yeosang's wedding and here you were, wrapped in Yunho's embrace. You had your first official date a few days after the wedding and it ended in the most intense kiss you had ever experienced in your life. From that moment onwards, your life was flipped upside down and you didn't regret one thing about it.
Your friends were ecstatic that you and Yunho made it exclusively official. Jina and Yeosang even joked that if you two were going to get married in the near future, that they would have to be part of your wedding party. You weren't even thinking of marriage yet. All you wanted was to enjoy your time with him without worrying about making a mistake. And the fact that you could call him 'my boyfriend' was simply icing on the cake.
When Yunho suggested that you stay the night, you jumped at the chance. As much as you loved spending time with him during the day, nothing beat being curled up with him in bed. Being this close to him made you forget everything else in the world.
You closed your eyes and sighed contently. In that moment, nothing mattered except for you and Yunho.
"Y/N?" A soft voice spoke into your ear. "Are you asleep?"
Your eyelids fluttered open and you turned to see Yunho staring at you with adoration. His hair fell into his eyes and his cheeks were rosy red. His smile made your heart skip a beat. God, he was such a beautiful man.
You shook your head, burrowing your face deeper into his chest. "Not anymore."
Yunho chuckled and lightly kissed your forehead. "You're too cute, babe."
"Mmm...keep calling me cute." You pouted playfully.
Yunho wrapped his arm tighter around you and pulled you closer. "Cute. My girlfriend is cute. So precious. Cute, precious, sweet, adorable, perfect, gorgeous, hot, sexy, beautiful. That pretty much covers every adjective there is when describing you."
Your cheeks blushed. "Gosh, Yunho. What will I ever do with you?"
"There's only one answer to that question." Yunho replied and started tracing random patterns on your stomach. "Take care of me."
Your heart skipped a beat as Yunho lowered his head and placed a gentle kiss on your lips. You leaned forward and cupped his cheek, wanting desperately to deepen the kiss. His mouth was warm and his lips felt so soft against yours. You couldn't help but moan as his tongue slowly brushed against your lips.
Your hands gripped onto his shirt and before you knew it, you were straddling his lap, moaning loudly as he continued kissing your neck. One of his hands ran up and down your thigh while the other caressed your cheek. The intensity between you two grew as the kisses became more heated. You grabbed his face with both hands and crushed your lips against his, giving him full access to explore your mouth. Both of your tongues intertwined and you moaned into his mouth, sending chills throughout your body.
His hands traveled up your legs and you quickly lifted your body off of his, leaving him breathless. "Yunho..." You breathed heavily, running your fingers through his hair.
"What do you want, baby?" He asked with lust-filled eyes.
"I need you." You confessed. "Don't you need me?"
Yunho smiled mischievously. "Every damn minute of the day."
You slid your hand underneath his t-shirt, running your fingers over his stomach. He groaned as your fingers pressed firmly against his skin. He moved his hands to cup your face and pull you in for another kiss. His fingers dug into your hips, pulling you tighter to him. Yunho sat up, tugging his shirt off before grabbing the hem of the t-shirt you borrowed from him and pulled it over your head. He threw it on the floor and admired your naked chest. You licked your lips, breathing heavily as he ran his hands up and down your sides, resting them on your breasts. He pulled your nipples into his fingertips and pinched gently, causing a low moan to escape your throat. He chuckled and planted a firm kiss on your lips.
You rolled over onto your back and pulled him on top of you, wrapping your arms around his neck. He ran his hands over your exposed skin and slowly slid your shorts and panties down your legs. Once you were completely naked, he took off his remaining clothes and lay down next to you, continuing to run his hands over your skin. He traced his fingers across your collarbone, dipping lower until he reached your breasts. You arched your back and grabbed hold of his hair, letting out a loud moan as he circled your nipples with his thumb and forefinger. His fingers pinched your nipple lightly, causing you to arch your back even more.
He licked his lips as he stared hungrily at your naked form. "God, you're so fucking sexy." He muttered under his breath.
Your breathing increased as he explored every inch of your body with his hands. You ran your fingers through his hair and watched as his dark eyes searched for yours. You tilted your head to the side and sucked on your bottom lip as he trailed kisses along your jawline. You closed your eyes and let out a moan as he covered your breast with his mouth, sucking hard on your nipple. Your nails dug into his scalp as he began to trail kisses down your stomach. He pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at you, waiting for you to tell him whether he should continue.
"Please." You whispered.
Yunho grinned wickedly and buried his face between your legs. You tensed as he ran his tongue along your wet slit, lightly brushing your clit. "Oh god..." You moaned as he placed small kisses all along your pussy, stopping briefly to tease your sensitive nub. You squeezed your thighs together, squeezing his head as his tongue ran along your clit.
He let out a little laugh against your inner thigh. "Babe, you’re going to suffocate me.”
You laughed, reaching out to grab his hair again. “I can’t help it. It feels so good.”
Yunho licked his lips. “Then don’t fight it, baby. Just enjoy the ride.”
You whimpered as he flicked his tongue against your clit, causing you to buck your hips. His mouth wrapped around your clit and suckled gently, causing an explosion of pleasure to flow through your body. You cried out and dug your fingernails into his scalp as you bucked harder and harder against his mouth.
"Yunho!" You cried out, unable to take it anymore.
Yunho removed his mouth from your dripping sex and stared at you with hooded eyes. "Let go, Y/N." He whispered. "Just let go."
With one last thrust of his tongue, you lost control and let out a scream as waves of ecstasy flooded through your entire body. You clutched Yunho's head, crying out as your orgasm exploded inside of you. Yunho continued licking your pussy until your orgasms subsided, kissing you tenderly afterwards. You laid there with your eyes closed, taking deep breaths as your heart slowed down.
Yunho propped himself up on his elbow and placed a soft kiss on your lips. "You okay?”
You nodded and placed a kiss on his cheek. "I am now."
Yunho laid next to you and you couldn’t help but straddle him again, tugging his pants down to free his cock. With one hand wrapped around his cock, you positioned yourself above him, lowering yourself slowly onto him. The way he gripped your ass made you gasp as you lowered yourself, allowing him to enter you. You held onto his shoulders tightly as he filled you up, his hips grinding against yours. You leaned forward and ran your tongue along his neck and shoulder, loving how his muscles tightened around you.
"Can't get over how good you feel inside me." You whispered.
Yunho smiled. "Feels good to be inside you, baby."
You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply, enjoying the feeling of him filling you up. He let out a deep sigh as you rocked your hips back and forth. Every movement sent delicious sensations coursing through your body.
Yunho leaned his head back and closed his eyes, groaning softly. "Fuck, I love it when you ride me like this."
"Yunho." You gasped, biting his lower lip as you rode him faster.
"I know, baby." He whispered, tightening his grip on your waist. "I love watching you ride me. Love how you look so fucking hot riding my dick."
"Oh god..." You whispered as he pinched your nipples. "Please...Yunho...don't stop."
You could feel his cock pulsating inside of you and Yunho couldn't help but flip you over unto your back, pinning you down on the mattress. You bit your lip as he ground his hips into yours, causing another surge of pleasure to rush through your body. His mouth found its way to your breast and he kissed it roughly. He took his time sucking on your nipple, making you squirm beneath him. His teeth scraped against your sensitive skin and you arched your back, gripping his hair tightly as he pleasured your breast.
"You're driving me crazy, baby." He whispered against your skin. "Tell me what you want."
You bit your lip and glanced up at him. "Yunho...please..."
"Tell me what you want, baby." He said, still teasing your nipple with his teeth.
You let out a frustrated groan and dug your nails into his shoulders. "Yunho...fuck me...harder...please..."
He growled and slammed into you hard, burying himself to the hilt. "That's it, babe. Take my cock. Take everything I give you."
Yunho grabbed hold of your hips and pounded into you with every thrust, making you cry out in pleasure. His large hands grabbed onto your waist and held you in place as he pumped you harder and harder. You wrapped your legs around his waist, clutching his body close to yours. He moved his mouth to your ear and placed soft kisses against your earlobe. "God, you feel so fucking good. Feels so damn good."
He kept pounding into you until you felt the pressure build up inside of you. "Yunho...oh god...I'm gonna come!" You cried out as you clamped down on him, milking his cock.
"Fuck! Fuck! !" He yelled, pumping his hips faster as he came inside of you. You cried out as you climaxed with him, your body trembling as you fought to keep your legs still. You clung onto him tightly as he slowly pulled out of you, gasping for air as he collapsed next to you.
Yunho looked down at you with glazed eyes. "That was...one hell of a fuck." He whispered, caressing your cheek with his hand.
You laughed weakly and shook your head. "Mmmhmm."
"Glad I could be of service, ma'am." He teased, stroking your bare hip with his thumb.
"Uh huh." You giggled, running your fingers through his hair. "Anytime."
You snuggled closer to him and he wrapped his arm around you. "How'd I ever get so lucky?" He whispered against your temple.
You cuddled closer to him and ran your hand down his chest. "We both know it wasn't luck." You whispered. "This has always been meant to be."
Yunho smiled. "Meant to be. Sounds right to me."
"You know Seonghwa invited us to his wedding..." You looked up at him. "You wanna go?"
"Depends." Yunho gave you a teasing smile. "You gonna drool on me again?"
"Maybe..." You smirked.
Yunho laughed and pulled you into a tight hug. "Wouldn't miss it for the world, babe."
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cookinguptales · 1 year
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So… I’ve been turning all this over in my head since last night, and I wanted to make a post about vampiric transformation as sex, and how it’s being used in wwdits as a metaphor for sexual repression, sexual freedom, virginity, and cuckolding.
Before I even get into the obvious metaphors about virginity and cuckolding, I think we need to talk about the elephant in the room. Guillermo’s sexual repression and how that’s come to find an outlet in his vampiric longing.
Guillermo is highly repressed, sexually speaking, but I don’t think he’s asexual. He’s shown interest in sex several times, but in an uncomfortable “this can’t be for me yet” kind of way. He was clearly raised Catholic and has internalized a lot of that shame re: sex, especially gay sex. He wants intimacy, but he’s also internalized the idea that wanting these things is dangerous and shameful.
But… the vampiric world seems to symbolize all the things that Guillermo wants but cannot have. He wants to be strong, powerful, attractive, and sexually liberated. As much as their openness about sex embarrasses him, there’s a certain longing there, too. He didn’t just want to be handsome as a vampire — he explicitly used the word “sexy.”
A vampiric Guillermo is a version of Guillermo that gets to have sex. Loudly, proudly, and without shame. It’s a version of him that is wanted, that wants, and who gets to have the precise kind of intimacy he's always craved.
Now, how much Guillermo has actually done sexually is still up for a lot of debate in fandom, but I think that’s kind of immaterial. For most of the show, Guillermo clearly wasn’t having the kind of intimacy that he wanted to be having, and he only started to even begin to allow himself to seriously consider all that in s4, when he got a boyfriend and came out to his family.
As being gay and wanting to be a vampire. 
Guillermo is finally starting to own both his homosexuality and his vampiric life, and that means he’s finally starting to explore sex.
Now… At the end of s4, I talked about how Guillermo going to Derek in the finale had the air of a person who’d been fantasizing about losing their virginity in a certain way all their life — but then they finally give up on those dreams and hire a sex worker instead. There’s a resignation there in Guillermo that he couldn’t get it “the old-fashioned way,” he’s disappointed and jaded when it comes to intimate relationships, and now he’s tired of waiting for love and just wants a business transaction.
I wasn’t quite expecting for them to push that metaphor even more in s5! The money aspect was almost forgotten (Did… Derek even take the money? Why is he still cleaning toilets?) but the scene with Derek biting Guillermo was clearly a metaphorical virginity scene.
Guillermo’s nervous eagerness, his growing realization that this wasn’t actually the way he wanted it to happen. Asking Derek if he’d ever done this before and figuring out if he was “ready.” Taking off his clothes (that his grandmother got for him, even, that’s a whole meta post right THERE) and trying to make the vibe “right.” His insistence that though Nandor had never done this for him, they still had a caring and intimate relationship.
But… it was also a metaphor for bad sex. Many people lose their virginity in a way they don’t find satisfying, and Guillermo definitely seems to fall in this category. It was awkward, it was bloody, it hurt, his partner didn’t listen to him, they weren’t on the same wavelength, they didn’t connect, there was no emotional bond, and most importantly, he didn’t feel changed.
Like a lot of people do, Guillermo thought losing his virginity would change him. He’d be cooler, sexier, more powerful. His station in life would change. He’d become an adult his ideal form. But he’s still just Guillermo.
As he told Laszlo, as soon as he did it, he regretted it. He immediately knew that he’d been right, that this wasn’t the way he wanted to do it. He wanted to do it with someone experienced who loved and cared about him, who listened to him, and he wanted that person to be Nandor. But he wasn’t patient, he paid an inexperienced acquaintance for a one-night-stand instead, and he was left feeling deeply unfulfilled.
Most upsettingly, he immediately discovered that, like virginity, you can’t lose it twice. He can’t just have a do-over with Nandor now. He’s given something up that he can’t give to anyone else, and he’s going to have to live with the consequences.
Because like sex for humans, transformation has social implications in the vampire world. It can only be done in very specific situations. Guillermo seems to have grown up in a human world where sex should only be happening within a heterosexual marriage, and now he’s finding that in the vampire world, transformation is only supposed to happen between a master and familiar currently in a contractual bond.
So… him going to Derek and finding “outlet” in another relationship, so to speak, is effectively vampirically cuckolding Nandor. He’s given that honor to another vampire, which Nandor seems to find both vampirically humiliating and personally hurtful. It would in fact hurt him so badly that he would probably not survive it, in Laszlo’s words.
(There’s also definitely an element of an abusive “if I can’t have you, no one can” vibe in Nandor’s threat to kill Guillermo and then himself if Guillermo got what he needed from another vampire, but since when have we ever liked them well-adjusted?)
Guillermo is realizing that, as much as he’s been thinking of this in sexual terms, so have the vampires. He thought he was the only one who thought it was a big deal. He thought he was the only one placing intimacy and partnership and loyalty into this event. But now he’s realizing that as much as it meant to him, it might have even been a bigger thing for Nandor.
For Guillermo, vampirism-as-sex represents the idealized transformational aspects of losing your virginity. He’d built up this big event in his mind that represented his intimate bond with Nandor, he’d built up this idea that the event would change him, would make him better, would make him free. But he’s finding, like many first-timers do, that sometimes it’s not transformational. It’s just awkward and disappointing and the only thing that’s changed is that you ache in the morning.
He still doesn’t have the intimacy he wanted. He still doesn’t have the ability to be loudly himself. He still hasn’t been able to fully own his sexuality and ask for what he wants. He wasn’t ready. He didn’t enjoy it. He regrets it.
He also regrets it because now he knows it will hurt Nandor and the relationship they’ve built. Because for Nandor, vampirism-as-sex represents the societal aspects of sex. The rules people follow. The societal humiliation you feel if you’re cuckolded. The personal agony you feel when you’re cheated on. The sense that your home is broken if your partner goes to find satisfaction with someone else.
Guillermo, who has had to deal with societal disapproval of his desired type of sex in the human world his whole life, was viewing vampiric transformation as a way to be free of all that. The shame and the repression and the societal penalties for being himself.
But he’s just found himself in a mess of new rules, hasn’t he? Different culture, same struggle. And while the vampiric world has always symbolized a sexual liberation that both repulses and attracts Guillermo, he clearly doesn’t have as much freedom here as he thought.
So… to sum up, Guillermo always kind of thought of transformation as losing his virginity. He associated vampirism with sex, and he thought this would be his entrance into the sexual world. He wanted to have an intimate experience with Nandor, but eventually gave up on that and decided to pay for it — and then immediately regretted it, both because he found it personally dissatisfying and because it came as a betrayal to the man he loves.
The problem is that he thought he was the only person thinking of it as sex — he didn’t realize that Nandor does, too, just in a very different way.
Nandor was also thinking of vampiric transformation as this special act, and one that belongs only to him as Guillermo’s master/partner. He was thinking of it in intimate terms, but also in societal partnership terms. He’s thinking of his household, while Guillermo was thinking of things on more individualistic terms.
If only they’d both talked about all this shit even once. :’)
But that’s not how we do things here in Staten Island!!! We just long for things ineffectively, keep secrets, and fuck everything up!
(There’s also a whole thing here about how Nandor wasn’t keeping his side of the relationship bargain and that’s why Guillermo looked elsewhere in a moment of weakness, but I guess that’s probably a separate post. This is long enough already.)
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astralnymphh · 7 months
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copy that, romeo
— ellie williams was supposed to be your supervisor, not your object of infatuation ~ ♡
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⋆❝ this is cordero tower, calling in.❞⋆
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CHAPTER ONE: SUMMERTIME INTERLUDE . NEXT CHAPTER > ♡. pair; firewatcher!ellie x recruit!reader
♡. summary; it's 1995, and the angel crater national park welcomes you; a retrograde lookout all to yourself, a space nerd for a supervisor, and a whole summertime job spent in hues of sepia and juniper, waiting for the first sign of smoke. ninety–three days. you don't know her face, you share no breath— but by walkie–talkie, you know her voice.
♡. a/n; READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. CLICK HERE. DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS. ALSO THIS.
♡. content; EVENTUAL SMUT, narrator present, silly fourth wall breaking, a dash of comedy, slowburn (somewhat), living alone, long–distance pining, reader/characters are similar ages(mid–late 20s), depression, heavy metaphor usage, complicated poetry styles, mentions of organs, mentions of weaponry, metaphorical death, grim humor, drinking alcohol, drunk!ellie, drunken flirting (vaguely and bluntly), ellie jumpscare, uh-oh sassy masc apocalypse, she's corny and cheesy too (a dork), awkwardness, humiliation, lighthearted bickering, nicknames used. [lmk if i missed anything] . SERIES PLAYLIST .
WC; 6.1k+ ✮ thank you @trackinglessons for your sexy brain and beautiful ideas + custom art ✮ masterlist ✮ series masterlist ✮ ellie ref sheet
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Summertime is the interlude between misery and Mondays.
  May was a rough patch for you. A coagulated chapter within the spring world, a shunned ponder, red jello in the gradience of passage. Tempus, time. Early months hence were just as pessimizing, doubt is an arid reservoir in you. But, as a maypole sits a svelte giant in the sweet Beltane soil, braving an invisible smile whilst little ones— little laughters, spun prances and wraps of dainty satin to an ensnare on its long body, it weeped for its delicate capture. You; flesh coarse like timber, relate to the log standing, ensnared. Sunk in that gelatinous texture, unmoving as pressures collided with the surface outward, ripples everywhere yet incapable of sprinkling through you. Something would have to delve itself to drag you out.
  Chapters; cusp of autumn to April, every single month, wound ‘round you. They each had separating colors, and spared turns to soundly fold your limbs and bulge your skin in ribbons. It snipped your circulation, shriveled the ripe breath in your skull and traded it for a pressure. A throb. Weight upon the cranium, you felt the narrowing cradle inside wilt from thought, drain from consciousness, and soften your stiff eyes locked on drywall. Hour to hour.
  But those weren't the only things taunting you with a dance— expectations danced faster. Expectators, paired minds heaping expectations; yourself and the selves blackjacking their wants expressed as worries onto you. Stressful creatures, they are. Bosses, co–workers, energy vampires disguised as lover boys prowling about your workspace, general creatures of the retail world. God, they're like ravenous wolves snarling hunger through their teeth, slobber moonlight–bright of that dire carnality for variety meats. Depression just took the first serving before they could.
  Even the domesticated places are a wilderness untamed.
  Stress drained you of life. It softened your desire to even try. Gods are dulling, blamed you, on another dull morning where the trickling sound of coffee pouring drilled irk into your ears, rather than simply a trickle. Caffeine, a roast so void–black was brewed to un–drain you. Yet, it fuckin didn't.
  Impugning was your everything, until it could no longer purify; Elaine. Emptiness. Hmm, you gave this state of vacuum–headed hollowness a name, keenly because it deserved so by its dismantling of your autonomy. You don't want it. It's not you. It's Elaine. A some–angel fallen out of grace, weary of its wander upon a washed up cove, beige toned and swept shivering–cold. Interested by the warmth your sundry organs pushed into its light silhouette. 
  And perhaps, if the bird was never freed from its heavenly cage, it would be powerless to pester you, to poke the meat inside with the pointy end of plumage.
  Elaine was an organized assault on your wellbeing, moreso against the pulpy, pinkish-gray blob sitting ugly above your throat. Believe it, or assume it. A paralysis, moving shoulders from bed sheets proved farcical, running bristles over your teeth twice a day rhymes with nonsense, and midnight ink born to swirl and curtsy to convey thoughts gone rancid, goes unused atop the white flutter between your journal hardcovers. You have a morbid case of the seasonal blues, except this time, the season is beyond its blue hues. Spring, a fuckin’ kaleidoscope embellished. Blotches of big fuck you greens so vibrant you'd long to die from your tears, and an abstract spit of smell me reds thorny as your stomach brought to a scream for something. Anything.
It was a slow, banal descent into the jello.
  January, floating atop the sweet delicacy, atop your bed.
  February, the solidity gave out beneath you, goo subtly etching around your ankles, calves, elbows, unforgivingly cold when it first hit. When in reality, the bed was heating from your lay.
  March, marrow goes heavy, your limbs at this time could not lift, your efforts waned, and satiating the rumble in you with sustenance was forgotten, as that rumble got so, so.. quiet. 
  April, the jello had stuffed your nose, your sockets, and lullabied your ligaments. You let it happen.
May.
  You let yourself sink. Let yourself decompose and go mush in the head. Like a zombie.
  The descent doesn't taste of sweet delight, but it also fails to churn your lips with a heavy saccharinity. Neutral, your hopeful side did say. Nothing, rationality slapped past your lips.
Five months, either a misery, or a Monday.
  Yes Eve, a bite out of the Apocrypha will indeed fill this human abysm in me. Forbidden knowledge is my craving. Contraband of truth, bite to bite, I envy that I could not cope with its coating of my empty gut earlier.
  Innocence is so dull. You are depressed, not a fucking saint for staying indoors, starving your rage.
  But on came a crisp bouquet of biker–boy newspapers; ‘Hiring’, and a few scans further; ‘Do you harness a great love for the evergreen?’
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  A honed section in Missoula's local print— jobs. A publisher boldens and compresses enthusiasm sporadically; writing–on–the–wall hollers speckle themselves meticulously on the newsprint that strike a sense of obligation into the susceptible and soft–of–heart chunk of the population. A pert voice read with persuasion between your ears, gritty in tone and stereotypical of a middle aged ranger, vocals fried by cigarettes but as booming as a cannon.
“Do you care for the animals inhabiting our national sanctuaries?”
  Abutting small paragraphs, the sagging belly of a black bear, tender caramel snout and snoopy–faced, fitted on its head a mustard yellow campaign hat labeled, ‘Smokey’. Its burly, blundering frame on all fours stood out over a comic–style vista of the Montana rockies, paws obscured by blocks of thickset text reading ‘Only you’.
  Huh, a realistic depiction of Smokey Bear— over a not–so–realistic background, avant–garde. 
  Tree greens sprawly that didn't shout ‘Fuck you’ on your poor, sunken eyes searing for sleep and a twilight darkness. Sagey lichens that didn't draw out the spasms above your own bones, calling your regard to bring pin–sized problems and blemishes sprawling your own flesh out of the bliss of ignorance. Brunette muds with only a fleck of sun, a slice of earth dull, humble and unprocessed enough from benevolence to leave you unconsumed, unsunken. A mere slop and pudge in the future and wake of your walk. Nothing obnoxiously grand, nothing sanctimonious. Nature is by birth— righteous, regardless.
  “Before we can be proud of our nation, our nation must be proud of us!”
  The advertisement gropes for a summertime made free. A cyclopean sinkhole in the becoming of time. Recruits–in–waiting are called to bargain normalcy and the bustling cities plump with lumbering limbs of sheen–tight pantyhose shaded under short shapes of plaid skirts for boot–cuts n’ backpacks hefty with gear that could either save you the trouble of mountaineering by path, or trouble your time with a faulty snapping of two things. Rope and neck.
Too grim?
  A months’–long moment of tension snapped at the pressure joint— Summertime the snapper.  You'd be devoting ninety–three suns, ninety–two moons, and some two–million breaths of fir laden air up in Angel Crater National Park, northwest of here. Pupils flickering the double-page setup, you continue: A pictographic, old–fashioned lookout taller than the timber spires surrounding would be your station, your core of operations, for those three young and sunny months. Boxed provisions and supplies are guaranteed to ship every other week, and testimonies encourage even the anxious, balmy buzzes of your brain to sigh in solace learning that the weald creatures there— are mostly harmless, if you aren't bred an imbecile. Alongside, an appointed supervisor, whose name was never disclosed duly except for a scratch of text gingerly clasped in quotations reading, “E.R.W” trailing the mention of said supervisor. What’s required of you was delivered plain written and patent on that shoddy newspaper, held thick in your intrigued thumbs; Keep the forest from catching wild fire.
  You fiddled the idea. Should I? Or should I wallow the summer away? Fiddled it anxiously, fiddled it needily, bumped the clumped rim of the newsprint on your cupid's bow in bending rumination, steadied it cause newspaper smells oddly good— but next to minutes racing hours upon musing, a conclusion had to knock your static looping of gloomdom in the butt.
  One phone call, and the bird would be barred again. Pesterer, Elaine the Terrible, would be cast back where eyes can't roll over the cottony clouds. Just a couple fucking prods to your number–pad, might genuinely un–drain you.
  Luckily, you aren't an idiot reared to take bullshit longer than meritted.
You took the job.
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May 30th, 1995, 7:28 PM.
  What does any clever pedestrian traipsing capricious terrain store in their pack to avoid total gangly–branch–grips–of–nature butchery?
Item one; Black nylons— scratch that, you aren't getting paid to snag at every kink and curl of the forest, tighties of gossamery fabrics are a no–go. Citywear stays citywear. Double scratch on those sweet, blackberry Mary Janes too prized and polished to muck up in shit of the earth. Immolating the rigid underside of some chunky hiking boots to the unruly woodlands is the adrenaline pinnacle of out–worlding, come on. It proves you've got a hardy backbone and the right row of teeth to chew what you've bitten off, sullying boots ‘till the color is forevermore stained. Backup boots are tradition, so that's item number two. Best get used to cargo, ankle–length overalls and miscellaneous graphic tees, cause the rockies’ fashion gurus can't get enough of ‘em!
Clothing, check.
  Swathes of ropes twined pumpkiny orange and plenty of clanging anchors to bolt them in, goddesses and gods forbid you be tight on anchors. Medical kits— duh, did you trudge all from yonder just to die out here? This country is dicey, at the cuddly claw of a bear, or not. Hair ties, scrunchies you hoarded as a teenager in the eighties, disposable camera to suit your flaky memories, and an eclectic dump of nutty and fruity cereal bars galore. Unless you're allergic. Substitute.
Accessories and essentials, check.
  Ah, and a spare pistol and switchblade in replacement of newcomer paranoia! Keep that hush–hush though. No matches or lighters, obviously.
True American, illegal weaponry, check.
  All this paraphernalia bangs and clangs heavily on the polyester holding of your backpack, straining your scruff uncomfortably as you tiptoe, scarcely tumble, and tread lightly across a log. It creaks, it groans, it wobbles slightly over the blaring white rush of a stream, suctioning your heart–to–stomach when it grinds a wee bit louder than you thought it should.
  “Shit!” you crimp your torso in and dart wary hands on the timber beam at your feet, assuming a gawky newborn–bambi–pose in hesitation, shuddering in cracked tones, “This can't be the right way..” 
  Hoping on an evaporated sun, you frazzlingly testify in repetitive thought that the map mailed by the rangers a week prior led you on this perilous and incorrect path.. for the last two days. Winding and wounding, literally— your bruises are measureless and on top of that ache your skin to want no more of this. But, you have to. A boulevard of brown, short and stout, wrung unyielding from one gray side to the greener other, a shortcut. Assumed to be a shortcut, based on the route drawn by utter confusion.
Oh yeah, and remember the advertisement stating the park was twenty-five miles out?
Nothing about that hot-press, black-cat inked newspaper accounted for the extra eight weighing your ankles down and your motivation dead low. Twenty-five only stretched out unto the ranger parking lot. The entrance, for fuck's sake.
  Shaky flit of your digits, they float gently off the carve–veined surface of the wood, unfolding your spine as you rise. “Wrong way—” you utter to your chest, oven–warm as it puffs, “—gotta be the wrong..” 
  Tentative–ism is normal here, right? Like, no way you're cautious and sweating at the brow for nothing. Right? 
  One foot— creeakkk— in front of the prudent other, two sailing lunges, three hurried hops and a matched thud soft as marshmallows plants your shoes to hallowed ground. Blades of verdant whiskers so innocent crush under, and it feels fucking— demeaning, actually. All that gulping and pausing.. for nothing.
  You tuck a shoulder–glance to the makeshift ricket of a bridge, and blankface, “Didn't feel like killing me today?”
The tree bears no reply.
  “Hmph, surprising. Seeing as someone killed you,” a sigh parts, fading into the whip and straightening of your head, “figured the pursuit of revenge doesn't stop at ghosts.” and the hoist of your boot up, carrying onward.
  Sundown paints, crescent layers repose approaching moonlight and dying sunlight sprawls psychedelic limbs above you. Balance ambling in tiny bops only made the swirling grasp of those gradient rays more trippy on your eyes and coercive of daydreams, rot–nip for the brain. You spot nutbrown brick— a fireplace in your mind, fevered heat roasting on the inside wall of your forehead too. It was Christmas before the storm, a subzero December. And it was, in fact, colder than the unreachable heaven. Dad was hunkered down in front of that innocuous amber crackle, his right leg slack to the ground and his left arched in the neck of an acoustic guitar, arms plaiting its hollow curve into his chest. 1971, when the veil through and within was thin, and love–vomit poured so easily through. A time of justified ignorance; Childhood. 
  Stood you adjacently, legs short and posolutely not stout, dimpled in the knees. Aged two years, and mushy as ambrosia, contorting your mouth jubilant as you're told for the camera, contrary to your father with his expression drooping to his strumming fingers. Sickly sweets, adult–you unpurposefully neglects to twirl lips at, your extraordinary grins now turned ordinary flat–lines. Holiday memoirs, those spoiled ripe quick after adulthood bolted itself in the slabs of your tender spine and instilled an artificial love for labor and country, displacing nostalgia from ever being seen as a flesh existence. 
“Say cheese!”
  America is sub–human, and sub–humans created America, the imperfect cycle. Families tear, eagles outcry, friends drink their death, and the days continue to unfold without a trace of acknowledgement. Days exist where you soak festivities and stave off the pointer–finger poking at so called slack you relish, and some twenty dwindling years ahead the slowly deadening oak grove road, carousals will be criminally known as layabout–makers.
Joy is a luxury now.
  A blockage prevents your foot from winching clean forward, meeting the bone–hard kiss of a boulder to sore your toes. “Fuck!” you brand your throat walls to a shout, pissed at the rock rather than your woolgather that lead you to said rock, “Fucking fuckhead rock!”
  Woolgather means daydreams, by the way. Funner to use words that don't make a split of sense. Yay for English.
 The sunset clouds dripped with a mania of fascination and had strung your brain to its hypnotic whims, like a siren had soloed a trance, drifting your mind somewhere utopian and phantasmagorical. It sounds silly, but, blanking out seems so often out of grasp from your control, you usually could never flag what caused it, when it started, and why. Nothing practical surfaces. Fuck, your head is so tangled upon memories, you haven't even noticed the progression of scenery twelve o’clock from you. 
  Ponderosa boughs band together where your eyes brush shapes and forage for a clue of what scene wants to greet you ahead. The sequestering silence of rustles indicates a clearing, possibly. Possible as it could be, you fully expected this cruel footslog to wallop your ass into a minefield, so you bet cards and course carefully beneath the crowns of pine, completely bent to the chance of another obstacle threatening your tender ankles. Leafy whispers above strum your ears brimmed with its sotto voce song, and then— colors it silently behind.
“Holy shit.”
  Presence crumbles above you, and opens before you. The lookout. Wood shafts slant in opposing directions, up and up along four brawny beams in three consecutive layers, like a blocky cone. The face closest to you overlaps the backing rest, giving the illusion of tufted wooden legs sketched under all lackadaisical. Endgame daylight spies from behind this one–roomed cyclops, gushing final spurts of citrus rays as if it truly was an orange squeezed to pulp. So, the flank and forehead of that towering, mountainscaping lookout rolling a cold shoulder to the sun, paves in a tattered tapestry of garnet smokiness instead. Shadow of sundown. From where you sow feet, a football field apart, petty details are difficult to squint into clarity, but the window panes appear tawny, too.
  An intimidation, “So much for a tiny room.” A beaute intimidation, “And no actual bathroom.” it makes you feel like a genuine insect compared.
  A sort of stairwell serpent faintly chokes the foot, the calves, the thighs, and punctures kindly a mouth leading up to the skirting balcony hedged in many gaunt teeth. Tamping gravel closer, subtleties and fine points fade as the tower's plank–lined and flat underbelly turns to you. Larger and larger, it dips darkly from miniscule masquerade.
  Bringing your decently aching foot to the first step, you press into the curb and meander your cruder aching— thanks to a random boulder— foot weirdly on the outer ridge of your boot. Making it up the stairs to fund yourself a fucking break was a palpable mockery in itself. Like, ‘Hey! Climb this long–ass stairwell for a teensy break before doing it all over again the next day!’. 
Un–fucking–believable. 
  Fifty years of history and past rangers grate in your walk, the floorboards thump with their stories, thump into your skin— verse you a wordless eulogy. Each step is a sentence, and every sentence branches into a whole tree of genealogy, lives. Lifestyles you can't understand now, but will.
  Really redundant of me to highlight the generations alive in those floorboards. The walk up there isn’t that exciting.
  After the last step, you're met eye–to–frame with a scratched door, pygmy window centered and paper–screened from within, and the stories predating your stay inspire a comical theory, “Jeez— bears make it up here?” you half–suppress a snort, palming a fist on the doorknob coldly before rotating and giving sympathetic pressure to the door.. jammed. 
  “C’mon..” knuckles pulse into the knobs plate, gradually upping the force you pushed, “.. losing light out here..” eventually adding your other hand to sweeten the push.
  Sure, a whole year has gone by since it homed somebody, and it's retro, but come on.
  Breaking splinters into the door was your last intention, so you try so–so carefully— to some extent, “Please..” now butting the tip of your boot on the rim to ease it— ease, and finally pry, a clapback of wind blowing dusty, nightfall air past your crescent cheeks following the snap of the fallow door.
  Thank goodness for your grace and balance, some days, avoiding a timely trip face–first to a floor so powdered in light dust, any kid would mistake it for a good time sweeping snow angels. 
  Not so good for the respiratory system though.
  Muggy space filtering your lungs tightly, you cough out, “Gah— fuck!” nothing higher than the level of a guttural wheeze, your chest punching into your throat. Gaping out the last flock of butterflies clumped at your collarbones, the tickle inside calms, and you find your sights taking in a dark box. A dim orb of lily silver glow rests in the middle of the pall room, raising the natural, “Where's the ligh— ah, big clunky thing—” 
  Flicking the off–white and stubby nub attached to an impractically sized lightswitch, which frankly resembles an electric box externally, an essence of Apollo ladens the room. Lemony–gold light, passably bright off the redwood ceiling, and murmuring a low buzz through one ear, and out the other, your pupils caper along the contrasting shades awakened.
  “Definitely retro, but.. no roommates.” spoke you, gingerly content with the colors piecing this camper pad together. You observe.
  Forget–me–nots bled the cotton bedsheets baby blue, leavening the mattress with a tidy emotion as it's tucked, folded at the top and draped in a complimentary quilt— benevolent blues, hues your lids soften on. The bed beelined from the doorway, a corner counter fawn–brown as the wood extends adjacent to it, covering the northeastern angle of the room. Magpied brands of canned food clutter shelves, spines spanning thick books of epic poetry to sci–fi comics create a ribcage of literature along a compact bookcase perching that countertop, and sunken in the east side of it, a steel sink. It shimmered sunflower bands of light as you moved, a rainbow–arched faucet brightened completely.
  Step by step, you draw near a circular table in the middle. Strange rods and gadgets stuck out of the borders, inlaid glass protecting a local map so sleek you could see a phantom of your face in it, and a black bar looming the width, so it rings with tangible importance. Of which you'll gauge about later. Truthfully, the journey by foot here? Dead–beating, your knees bloated, throbbed flesh hot, and almost buckled; fatigues infamous way of scolding you to sit the fuck—
“Sup Maple lake, you there?” 
  A pang hammers to your heart, and a crawlish wave of startled blood pales from your face and drops to your jaw, “Jesus!” sweat hitting you a blink after, every normal function just— flunked. That voice, more like a ruptured stereo sizzling, caught you the fuck off guard. Now you dither, dumbassery taking your eyes through a new loop of figuring out where–why–how and what the robotic intruder wants.
  But pre–realizing, your ears perk to a more coherent, and outstretched string of static, “C'mon, know you're checked in.” and post–realization tugs your eyes to a mustardy n’ black cased device; a walkie–talkie.
  Okay, way to creep recruits out. Whoever, for whatever reason— at the nick of night too, gimme’ a break. You wry, knitting raisin crinkles above your nose, trying to discern your palette of options; pick up the walkie, tap in and feign politeness in the shortest and sluggiest scraps of small talk to be done with the day, or rant off the bat— highlight how fucking late it is, and how taxing a double–goddamned–day hike made your head and patience feel. And right now, the second response route feels arguably more tempting than—
  “This is Cordero Tower, calling in. Can see ya’ standing by the Osborne, by the way.” 
  Its staticy feedback has waned completely, densening a thick husk and tilting towards a honeyed undertone. Relaxed sounding or not, what the fuck.
  You react predictably, flicking your chin west, then east only for you to meet the dead of night— thanks mountains— stalking perfectly in every single window. So, useless to check. Answering it was a yes–go, it would be sickenly awkward to thrust it under the rug now. Your knees pull forward, eyes calligraphing the power buttons tinted in cherry light, palm drawing to meet your focal point.
  The case is ribbon gentle under your fingertips’ graze, fresh and in store–new condition. Maybe the only thing hot from the pot of newfangled technology. Plastic intricacies roll under until you settle on a swollen button, denting the plush of your finger as you press, hold, and speak. A crisp crackle activates your line, tuning you in.
    Breath hesitates between your chords, “Maple.. lake.. speaking,” off–the–tongue words manifesting on–the–spot, “you can see me?”
  “Yeah.” the walkie chuckles, sugary curl pitching up and through their tone, “Look out ur’ north window, you'll see her.”
Her?
  Nooking your nose north, you only widen pupils on that same, starless coast of darkness nosing the rim of your window sills. What do they mean to—
  “Nh–no,” You literally said north, “get closer to the window, n’ look up.” What, are you a fucking sparkling, rasp–voiced eagle?
  “Fuck are you talking about,” mouthed you void of voice, stumped on what this person was getting at. Wedging your knuckles below the meshy underside of your backpacks right strap, you wrangle it down your arm as you glide rubbery sole along croaking oak, tossing that bag so cumbersome atop a lily white pillow— looking fresher than a daisy, and clamber the mattress pliantly dented to your knees to grasp a broader panorama. 
  And with that window hood washed over, a convoy of fireflies focus a tiny constellation in the murked glass. Little pinholes of light, dots in the distance. They rough–hew a blur, but the excess seconds taken to brood squints and balance the blurry blotches, an outline crops up. Another fire lookout, sprouting from rock and rise of a berg. Offspring of the distant cordillera that gives this whole park its sense of a cradled–woodland, but either way thought, a lookout hosts it home on top.
  “You can see me from all the way out there?” you wondered, truly. I mean— at minimum, a sore sprawl of miles bridges you both.
  “Mhm..” a pause loiters that fluid hum, then some really throaty syllables, “Binoculars~” you could almost envision— nah, feel the stare of those binocs, undoubtedly taking note of every contort in your body right now.
  “Oh thats, totally.. not,” you blunt your tone, shying a few inches from the glass, “.. creepy.” awkwardly. “Uh, who are you anyways— are you like, uh, another recruit?” as you engage small talk, grumpy frown pouting, the habit of kissing your wrist to your jaw as you would a piglet–tailed telephone overruns your burnt out focus, having to wince the walkie away when your eardrums nearly burst.
Ouch.
  “For one, I'm actually your supervisor. I know, I don't sound like a typical smoker–lunged, middle–aged white dude.” their tone gruffs and deepens to impersonate, finger air quotes practically radiating from the other end, “And two, my name is Ellie— Ellie Miller–Williams, if you care.”
  “Don't.” you heave out the pain stretching your head, aching each time you simply thunk.
  “Straightforward,” her timbre ups in approval, seemingly, “I like it. I like you, recruit I dunno’ the name of.” and a bubble hics her throat, quite audibly.
  “Not single.” Wrong, just uninterested. Hooking two fingers in the fabric handle of your bag and craning it to the ground, with scattered grates of plastic buckles skating the floor.
“What?”
  Oh, shit she wasn't— oops, ‘course she meant that platonically, heads so damn muggy,  “Uh, it's—my name.. sorry I’m just a bit out of the loop—” Dumbass, unscramble your brain alphabet soup, will you?
  “That’s a long ass name, what were your parents thinking? Haha.” Her duo–beat chuckle flares your humiliation, and then proceeds to pinch its swollen parts into total inflammation, “Where does it originate from?”  
  Cheesy bitch, “Can you not— I like, pfhh..” you temper yourself with a moon–cool blow to chap your lips and inflate your cheeks, ending up with a draw of an even more loosened tongue sour as it complains, “Did a whole two–day hike through the most torturous terrain just to get here, I really don't—”
Please.
  And if gripes trudged through teeth aren't persuasive enough, you recess your bone–ache bod avidly in the springy haven of your bed which chirped at your weights shifting motions, collarbones packing down on your vocal chords. You shouldn't sound up to chat whatsoever. Instead, vehemently drained, “I just wanna get some shut eye, talk me over n’ the mornin’.” your thumb lying a button away from disconnecting. 
  “Hey, hey—” Ellie ushered, her slurry breath fogging up the mic. Lips squeak softly into it, smacking before an intone, “Can't I be a little curious?”
  You synchronized in noise, sucking teeth behind heart–pursed lips, “Do you think somebody this exhausted has the appetite to entertain you?” stilling your thumb–pad on the power off key.
  “If I keep bothering you,” that alone ticked you, her blatant drive to carry on when your brain rejected its substance, “.. yeah. Maybe you'll be nicer then too.. huph!” a heartier peep hicced up on the speaker, and right then that noise jogged a discovery.
“Are you drunk?” has to be.
  Of course, she ignores the naked and sorely obvious, “Did your boyfriend break ur’ heart or something— an’ that's why you're out here?” bottle sloshing in the background of her mumble.
  Dumbstruck, you furrow a miffy expression, “W–what, boyfriend?” 
  “Said you weren’t single.” she recalls, warmly unspinning the fuddle that knit your brows, “Think I forget so easily?” drawled like a sultry retort, baking your ears.
You a hundred percent forgot though.
  Gosh, short–term memory sucks, or it's just your energy drought making you woozy. Blame it on lethargy, “No no, that was just.. tired talk. I thought you were hitting on me.” 
  “Oh? That's cute.” her choosing to say that latter statement unfolded discordantly, you seriously couldn’t gauge if that was a flirt, or another paper daisy— mock honey, a platonic notion. Even so, it sounded so damn smooth, lace to the ears. “But no, I wasn't— m'not like gay or ‘whutever.” stammered her, light snort fanning.
  A stifled chuckle hops from your chest, mixing with hers, “Uhuh, cool.” halfway uncaring and halfway amused, bafflement working your facial muscles. 
  “Yeah, um, but seriously..” her voice drifts into a ponderous rasp, the faint rustles of flimsy paper licking page to page subtler than her speech, “what's got you out here, newbie?”
“Newbie. Really?” A brow pricks.
  “I mean, you're new— new to the lookout, new to the job, in need of my phenomenal supervision and my wide range of knowledge. Yeah, a newbie.” 
  Then your brow mellows, tension held in your face dropping dead on backhanded flattery, “You are funnily agonizing.”
  “Aw.” her scratchily suave coo has your jaw set like stone, “That's so sweet.” but her short–lived song has your heartstrings soaked in ripe honeycomb, touched to the core by sweetness nebulose and an assortment of some foreign threads. Thickened heart, tighter ribs, a churn to weaken your stomach, a maverick of things unfamiliar to you.
  Momentaries, but still noticeable even if your senses were twisted backwards.
  Chewing over how you'll begin to explain, a few letters sift through your chords, until you hook on a sigh, “Ah, well, I'm out here for a fuck ton of reasons—”
“Reasons, or— huhp, problems?” Ellie blurt–hics, nosy.
“..”
  A brief gulp and exhale wheezes from her, “Sorry, it's the bourbons’— super good. Continue.” 
 You loosely split your mouth, gasping to exchange a gale for words pressing out, “A series of reasons, and problems, that I don't bother to lay on a grand platter, so you'll get a summary tossed on an appetizer plate.” you preface. Allow an elliptical gap to cut through, rousing her hum to let you know her ears are as intent–peaked as a Chihuahua’s, “Contact with my parents’ has gone cold, my last job made me want to hurl into a pack of crocodiles— and the city became too loud and too heavy–handed. Saw this job on the local paper, and got the hell out of dodge.”
An omissive summary, you meant. 
  There’s more that eats the heart. People can’t just.. drop the burden of knowledge wantonly on randos like they’re idling under fertile treetops waiting for the apples to plummet, biting into a pulpy biography. She’s just a girl, not a therapist.
  A discomforted purr lengthens into her reply, “Mmmmh, ever try a drink or two?” her intoxicated reply.
  “Oh, see,” you flap your hand and slap it to your denim clad thigh, “you are drunk.” as if she could even see your gesture.
  “No, I’m Ellie, hmhm~” comes with a giggle, and you consider her state of insobriety to be— wavering, but it’s stimulating to hear her fluctuate between groaned jokes and extra raspy comments, “Still haven’t told me your name though.”
  Some moments during this whole ‘Who are you?’ seminar made you concerned for your future here— if you’ll make it out psyche intact, but some moments found by winnowing through the illogical backtalk touched you with inbound camaraderie.
  Invisible touches that inhabit your neck with a leak of your name so— sincerely. It transforms into a fairer sound on your ears when she repeats it, affirming it. Nobody else's teeth clutches your name so welcome as she.
  “Hmm, ‘name kinda fits your voice.” odd commentary, but since composed with her already peculiar and drunken tongue, the shoe fits.
  That said, crabby confusion seems easier to articulate, “Thanks, weirdo.” but lips rebellious, they press an inevitable grin together. 
“No problem, sleepyhead.”
So many nicknames.
  Recognizing that downtick in hubbubs and breaths on the walkie, checking out for the night posed as a passionate option the burden weighing your eyelids couldn't or shouldn't veto. So you haul your torso up, kick and poke your toes over ankles to butt your boots off prior planting your heels, whisking toward the lightswitch and committing your lookout to swell with the outside's dark fresco. 
Stygian tones.
  “Speaking of sleepy heads..” you taper off speech, leaving the rest to her— touch wood— wide enough, hopefully–not–drunk–enough imagination to fathom as you slide and slip desperately beneath woolen blankets, sleepy worries, and sentences sailed to rest.
  “Aw man.” Ellie bums so, so stupidly, for comical value.
“Yeah, man.”
  “Mpht—” wetness smacks, “wanted to bore a pretty girl to death with recruit regulations and syllabi..”
How would you know?
  In reality, Ellie was reaching a transcendent caliber of wasted, drinking up your atmospherics and drunken to her gutly core. Woods hatch forlorn people; forlorn people get thirsty, “But, mhh, heads’ nearly falling off, whoof.” she expresses a soaring of vowels, but it parallels a gruff howl more. 
  Drowsy, buzzy jubilancy, plucking her flirty strums. You sugarcoat the flare in your chest hearing ‘pretty girl’, ears clicking to the swallow convincing your heart that Ellie was not flirting. As established; She’s under the influence, and not gay. Your brain repeats that, over and over, repeat, repeat, she isn’t flirting. 
  “Hey, here's a tip..” you inch the walkie a penny away from your flopped head, clefting your lip open, “Don't get drunk on the job. They didn't hire you to decoct your brain the day before chaperoning a recruit in the literal wilderness. So, stash that shit, n’ let's both get some shut eye, yeah?” and saying all that, may have just cashed in your last dose of breath and brain cells for the night.
  Ellie being Ellie— well, what you suspect is a ‘her’ thing after these few speckled minutes, dopily laughs at you. And dammit if she wasn't glamoring a dopey smirk in accord, you’ll have gleaned wrong.
  A voice, “Who’s the boss again?” her witty and cruel wisecrack, “They didn't pay you to boss the— hup, boss around.” 
  They will pay you to confront and reflect your spectrum of limits if this girl brushes their seams, that's for certain. Or, play God and lambast her, tender as milk.
  There's even a stroke of a chance, that your crooked lips poached her dopey grin instead, “Kay, well, maybe they'll reimburse me for your poor services.” 
  “My services are not poor. You'll see, tomorrow.” the volume of her melts away, going muted under liquid swills clanging on glass.
  “Please tell me that's the sound of you putting the bottle away.”
  “Mhm!” came out plugged, the bottle confining her garble, then popping clean as a cork, “Fuck— okay,” she siphons air in, pure little clink tinting the end of her sharp–edged sniffle, “Make sleeping in earlier worth it t’morrow, wanna drive you nuts with my questions.” she nasals, drawing near the mic again.
  Such a magpie, “Cause you're lonely?” and weird.
  “Shut up,” she shushes you, a satin whisper light–hearted and quick on beat, “M’not lonely anymore, right?” The type of softly spoken outcry that would balloon your cheeks with soreness if you were face–to–face with the throat that conducts it. Involuntary smiles plague you everywhere. But there is no mouth, no larynx, no throat that you view the swallow of. Just a walkie, so you settle in stoicism.
  You tug your upper–lip and pivot your eyes, drumming up something clever to combat, “In a sense. Not like we’re bunkmates, thank goodness.”
  “Fuck you,” Ellie breaks into a cuss spout so serenely, she sounded small and harmless, “just go to bed.” reduced to birch in winter shed of its brittle autumn arguments.
“Don’t gotta tell me once.”
  By the first full and emphatic giggle she cast just now that wasn’t suppressed nor achieved by humble pie, you take it that Ellie found you funnily harrowing just as her, two peas in an outstretched pod. Fault be with her, for getting wasted. Otherwise, you might have pried her skull open with questions dolled up as a pruner, clipping the forelimbs that are foliated in a messy breadth of first glance leaflets and attitudes until you piece it prettily, in a way that thralls you to never shrink your eyes back into their sockets. Drunk people are like prone beehives though, so you don't prod them.
Tomorrow, you can paint her portrait, or vice versa.
“Whatever you say, newbie.”
And with the whirry crunch of the walkie shutting off, Monday, came to a close.
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if you enjoyed this chapter, please lmk what you thought!! i love getting asks about my content ♡
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intermundia · 1 year
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in defense of padawan haircuts: do ewan and hayden both have lovely hair that is part of what makes them ever so beautiful? yes. but padawans are monks in training so they're not supposed to be fuckable treats for the eye. they have funky hair that marks them as members of their order!! awkward, uncool, unlovely haircuts that make them look like dork ass home-schooled losers. their silly braids advertise the length of time they've studied as a proxy for their deepening commitment to the order and mastery of the jedi arts!! they have a stubby lil nerf tail because it's traditional and tradition is sometimes awkward (and idk some cultures actually enjoy hair in that style!! they're not supposed to look like usamericans maybe) and like.. the order also maybe doesn't want its baby jedi to be fashionable trend setters with glossy flowing locks for good reason!! look what happened when anakin was too pretty!! he was so fuckable it broke the system and ruined his life and the entire fuckin galaxy, maybe the council should have made his haircut worse. his hair should have been so deeply tragic it distracted padmé from his sharp jaw and pouty lips. obi-wan should have completely nuked his charisma stat from orbit before shipping him away to naboo (his game was already terrible, so he was halfway there!! just make him terrible to look at too!!) sexy hair needs to be earned with knighthood, once they know you're truly committed to the jedi way. curls and mullets are a privilege not a right!! the padawan haircut is like training wheels for non-attachment, like.. leave them alone!! their brains aren't done cooking yet. their hair is so bad it's good, just like the prequels ok. i'm bleeding out on this hill but you. Cannot make me leave
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bogleech · 8 months
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For me the most disappointing thing about Palworld is the designs being so boring and bland that you'll never have cause to review them. We deserve better from a creature collecting game, especially one making this much money!
Yeah here's the most opinion I can possibly muster on any of them:
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DUMUD: it's a big fat shark-like mudskipper and that's a good concept, it just doesn't really have the charm of any Pokemon it shares anything in common with.
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WUMPO: resembles the fur-wearing "werewolf" pokemon that got cut from the first or second generation, crossed with Tangrowth. One of the more okay designs because those are two good pokemon.
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SIBELYX: this is supposed to be their Gardevoir I guess and I think it's an owl? Or is it a moth? Well it ends up one of the slightly cooler looking ones a little less obviously derivative of specific pokemon. Maybe they were also going for a Dimitrescue knockoff with the hat
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CAWGNITO: an alright one because plague doctors just generally look cool. However the simple formula of plague doctor + actual bird would have been far too obvious and underwhelming as a Pokemon. There's no novelty or twist to this.
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HANGYU: this is the one that's a ghostly noose canonically used to execute people. It's a funny little send-up of the darker pokemon pokedex entries, though the design is uninspired compared to object-based creatures in Pokemon, Digimon or any other monster franchise I can think of.
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LOVANDER: this is one that fucks people, and they possibly borrowed the topography of Salazzle's official model. I want to think they did intend it to be freaky and unwholesome looking with the rubbery goblin hands, but I suspect they intended something actually sexy by furry monsterfucker standards and just weren't good at it. Yes I know that likely does not stop people from being into it anyway.
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TEAFANT: I was going to say this is the only pal that looks better than its closest equivalent Pokemon, because they would be Cufant, and I gave Cufant a pretty negative review back in the day.
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......But actually, now I kind of like Cufant. A lot, come to think of it! Teafant is cute and competent in the most paint-by-numbers possible way. It's what almost anyone would draw in ten seconds if asked to make a cute marketable teacup elephant pokemon. Cufant is an awkward, messy design but it is comparatively cute in a goofy, dorky way that's rare among the Pals, and more importantly, it is unique. I don't think they used AI to generate any Palworld models (the tech isn't there yet) but I can see why people assume they used AI just to get the initial ideas, because it's very easy to find people who have more a more creative eye for character design. I'd say even if not ESPECIALLY people with zero experience in art would have made the Pals look more interesting.
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subbypeterparker · 1 year
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Hazel Callahan x fem!reader smut headcannons
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ugh look at my girlfriend, she’s so 🤭
repost since it didn’t work out…
She’s 100% a switch and I take no criticism. She’s such a pleasure dom, it’s actually dizzying, yet she can also be the cutest sub ever, all desperate and whiney
She’s inexperienced for sure, but she’s such an easy learner, especially when it comes to someone else’s pleasure
Hazel has a tendency to be insecure, especially about her looks, performance, almost anything, no matter how many times you tell her she’s perfect (and she really is)
Maybe tied into her insecurities, she’s big on praise, both ways. She loves being called beautiful, and being praised for absolutely everything there is about her
She’s such an angel, and whenever she’s near you, she can’t help but praise you for being so pretty, so sexy, so good for her, anything. Every time she sees you, she can’t even believe you’re hers
“You’re doing so good baby, so pretty for me, so beautiful” is her most repeated sentence, and you never tire of hearing it, especially when she’s all breathless and fucked out while saying it
Breathplay is maybe her biggest kink, and whether she’s giving or receiving it, she’ll love it
The light grips on each others throats when you’re too desperate to do anything else, or clamping your thighs around the others head, so drunk on the pleasure that neither of you can help it
The small noises that leave your mouths when you realize the loss of breath, and the moans that get caught in your guys’ throats
Holding. down. your. wrists. Oh my god, let me tell you, to her, nothing looks better than to have you pinned under her, unable and unwilling to move
Being underneath her is the single sexiest thing ever, and she knows you love it as much as she does
Hazel will get so cocky and proud seeing you underneath her, and takes her time teasing and touching you, knowing you’re enjoying it as much as she is
“Look at you underneath me…so perfect…so pretty…” with giggles and sloppy kisses when she can breath from being flustered at you lying underneath her
She’s definitely not opposed to being pinned down by you (it’s the sub in her), and she’ll have the cutest smiles and giggles from being so flustered
Something about being pinned down by you just has Hazel preening into your hands, excited and begging you to do anything you want to her
She's very awkward to be honest, but the more experienced she is, the cockier and more dominant she'll be
Don't get me wrong though, sex with her is full of laughter and jokes, since neither of you can stop smiling when you're together
She can be so shy during it, but a few praises and touches by you, and she’ll be blushing and comfortable for more
She’s such a big fan of marking, and leaving as many hickies as she safely can on your neck. Something about you wanting to show people you’re hers makes her so happy and proud, she won’t be able to stop
Hazel is such a fan of body worshipping, and is completely obsessed with running her hands all over any part of your body she can, she can never get enough of it
Her goddamn chains. Holy shit. They’re genuinely enough to have a girl drooling and on her knees (it’s me, I’m the girl)
She gets so cocky when they hang over your face as she fucks you, and will go crazy if you pull her in for a kiss with them
God, the way they shimmer and highlight her collarbones and neck, displaying perfectly her skin that’s bare and ready for you to mark up
Now, speaking of someone being on their knees…
She’s a goddamn giver when it comes to that, nothing to her tastes better than you, and she won’t stop until you’re so overstimulated, you’re crying
Hazel’s an amazing learner, as previously mentioned, and thrives off of learning how to make you feel so fucking amazing
Believe me, learning to eat pussy is amazing, and trust that Hazel doesn’t shy away from going batshit crazy, and diving in like the lesbian she is
As for receiving, that’s when she starts to lose her edge, and becomes a puddle for you
Eating her out will make her become such a sweet sub for you, who’s only thoughts are staying where she is so you’ll keep touching her
She’ll be squirming and grabbing onto anything she can in desperation, whether it’s the sheets, a desk she’s on top of, your hair, anything she can reach
Honestly, the only sight better than her back arching while you touch her, is her pretty face looking up at you from between your thighs
She has the biggest puppy eyes known to man, and they look even prettier than normal when she’s crying and all desperate for your touch
Especially when she has those dark bruises on her face from the fight club (like her look during the football game, which was so…)
She’s such an angel with aftercare, always too obsessed with if you’re okay, and never paying attention to her needs
You never let that happen though, and the rest of your time together is spent lying down, eating, and watching tv together until you both fall asleep
899 notes · View notes
yuyu1024 · 2 months
Text
Good morning, Love
Pairings: San × y/n
Genre/tags: lovers with age gap
Warning: 🔞 fluff but still smut, pet names, cursing, suggestive/unprotected sex (be safe everyone), hj/bj, insecurities, judgement on physical appearances
~~~ [lmk if i miss anything]
Words: 2.3k
Disclaimers:
- this story is just made up
- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊
A/N: no plot. I tried writing without stopping yesterday but i fell asleep as my meds kicked in... 😅 and yeah this is it.
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It's always so awkward for you when your group of friends talk about their each own lovelife stories. It's not because you are jealous, envious, bitter or whatsoever. No. You can't be either of those things as you are not single and have a dry lovelife.
However, they don't know that. That is the thing. No one knows you are dating. Why? Because you are scared to be judged. Especially in this modern world where some are just entitled with their opinion. Tells what they think even though there is nothing wrong with it.
Yeah... there is nothing wrong with you dating no. You are in love. Both of you are. But... what you think can be the issue in this society is the age gap.
Funny enough, the distance of your age to your boyfriend is not even that big. It's just roughly five years. But for you, its like a fossil dating a baby.
***
"Good morning, Love..." your man greets you as soon as he comes out of the bedroom.
He is smiling ear to ear seeing you, his dimple is showing and his eyesmile is just the cutest.
"Why are you up so early...?" he hugs you from your back as you finish washing the pan you used for cooking breakfast for him.
"I just... felt like it." You answer smiling
"Hmm..." he inhales your scent. "But... it's saturday..." and then he pushes your hair off your neck and nibble tiny bits and pieces of you. "I was hoping for a quick hot fuck with my love..." he gnarls
"Sannie... we already had sex last night.."
"So...?" He pauses and looks a little offended, "why? Don't you like it when we do sexy time in the morning...?"
"No...." you twirl around to face your Goddess boyfriend. He have been working out more lately and it is so visible. He's so buff. "Well..."
"Well?" He arch one brow, waiting for you to explain.
"Don't you get tired?"
"Of what? Having sex? No! I work out to have good stamina for you..." he kisses you on your shoulder, "to make sure I please you, my love..."
You chuckle at how serious he is with his answer and yet so cute pouting.
"Not sex... I know you will not get tired of it... I know... believe me..." you tease him by biting your lip and then lightly running your fingers from his thight to his very noticable erection. "I meant... me... you... getting tired of me."
"And why would I?" He frowns.
"Well..." you lean back to the sink, giving a few inches of gap between you two. "I'm... older... and not that good looking..."
"What are you even talking about?" He is not smiling or being playful anymore. He just looks very not amused by your choice of words to describe yourself. "What's the matter? Why are you saying that about yourself...?"
You press your lips together as you don't know what to actually tell him.
It's not his fault. God no. San is an incredible lover. He always makes you feel loved, appreciated, contented and secured It's just your own insecurity. It's just your own thoughts whenever you try to compare yourself with others. Especially with all these younger and prettier girls around, in his work, in this neighborhood and online.
Well you don't think he will cheat. San is not like that. However, one day, if... he suddenly feels like settling down and having a family on his own. You are not the best option for that. 32 yrs old is not THAT old but... even though you are in that age, you haven't thought of settling down still.
You enjoy your time with San. But you are also afraid that you are waisting his prime years with you. Fucking you 'till you can't walk instead of someone...
"Love?" He grabs you by the waist, realing you in back from your thoughts. "Stop it okay?"
He knows you so much that he can tell from you zoning out.
"I fucking love you."
"I... love you too..." you say softly
"Then what's the matter?"
You shrug. "I don't know..."
"Are you going to leave me?"
"What? No!" You snap
"Then... stop overthinking about things that are not our problem right now..." he leans in and kisses you on the lips. "Whatever you are thinking about me, going away... it's not gonna happen. Okay?"
"Okay..." you try to sound confident.
"Answer me... with confidence love..." he lower down a bit more so his mouth reaches your tits.
He lets his tongue make circles over your thin white top, licking and making it basically see through with his saliva.
"Sannie..." you breathe, holding on to the to the counter top for support as you feel something in your stomach flutter. "What...what... are you doing... huh?" You throw your head back.
He didn't stopped. He continued licking until he had to tease you a bit more by bitting your now hard bud. He is literally reeling you out of those nonesense thoughts of yours.
Then his one hand going to your other tits, kneading it while his delicate fingers pinch and caress the other nipple.
"Are you happy with me?" He asks, his eyes looking at your face while his mouth is busy, continuing sucking.
You look down at his naughty eyes. "Y-yes... I am...."
You see a hint of smile from him. A little devilishly smile. He can't hide it even though his mouth is so busy with you.
You press your thighs together as you began to feel an undeniable intense pressure down there. It is tickling you from inside out.
"San!" You arch your back even more, making sure he can suck it more.
He growls his excitement as he sees you get more into it. He then takes you by your waist pulling you to him. You can feel his rock erection through his jogging pants.
"Maybe..." you breathe as he pulls away from your tits.
"Maybe what, my love?" He eyes you with so much adoration and happiness.
"Let's go back to bed?" You shyly asks
He just laugh and picks you up like a bride. "I can stay all day in bed if you want..."
He carries you back to your room and gently puts you down.
"But... I don't mean it like... you will take care of me..."
"Eung? What you mean?" He tilts his head, confused with your words.
"Let me..." you reach for the hem of his pants and slowly curl it downwards. "I want to take care of you today..."
He bites his lips, surpressing his excitement. "But love... you need it... what you said earlier..."
"I know... I know..." you kiss him on the cheek. "I felt a little... down... but..."
"But.... what?"
"I know I maybe older to you...however you are much mature among the two of us..."
"And...?"
"Well... you've taken care of my needs... and fill up my emptiness whenever I need it... want it..."
"And...?" He arches his brow
"And... its only me that overthinks about us...no one really calls me out... I just.. assume they do... or will do..."
"Love... Whatever you feel or think about us... is valid... the world right now... well they say people are more accepting nowadays... they do but still not all of them. Even within ourselves..."
"Yeah... I guess..."
"But... then... why do you want to take care of me?" He leans closer to kiss you. "I am so ready to put my dick in you now...." he mumbles as your lips separates.
"Because..." you glance down at his pants and then back to his eyes. "I want it..." you breathe the words out, sounding like a whine. But its not. You just want to give him what he deserves.
You ask him to switch with you. You let him sit on the edge of the bed while you stand up.
"Love.." he bites his lower lip as he watches you move.
You are not even doing anything yet. You are just standing up and looking down at your man, drool over you. White wet shirt and your black fitted cycling shorts.
"Oh San... you look aroused already..." you giggle as you see his face. "I haven't done anything yet."
He pouts and wrap his arm around your waist and presses his face on your tummy. "I can't help it. You're so fucking hot."
"I love you...."
He tilts his head up and smile. "I... love... you..." he whisper. "So...... much!" He adds at the end
You grin as you find him adorable. However, "Fine Mr. Loverboy..." you push him away from you, forcing him to lay down on his back. "Let's go back to business..."
You pull his pants down to his ankles and then removed it gently before throwing it away. You have your serious face on whilst your boyfriend is covering his face, hiding behind his hands. He's not laughing or what. He is shy and can't hide his excitement, that's all. Hmm... well, he can't really hide it. His dick is showing how turned on he is.
"Don't you want to look at me?" You ask
He takes his hand off his face and push himself up with his elbows. "Fuck!" He blurt out when he sees you naked and going down on your knees.
You grab his length and gently pump him a few times, making him squirm under your touch before fully taking him in your mouth.
"Love..." he moans as he feels the wetness and warmness.
You lick every vein and curve. Even the very tip where he is so sensitive and making him go crazy.
"Shit!" He gasps, "Love!" He grabs onto the bedsheets and tries to stay in place for you.
You bob your head fast and then slow teasing him his high. You want to make sure that he is feeling everything and emotionally having it all. You can even feel his length twitch in your mouth which means he is close.
"Y/N...my love..." he gets up and grabs you by your face and kisses you on the lips. He can taste himself in you but fuck that. He is so high right now with arousal and love for you. "I need to fuck you now or I'll go insane."
Climbing onto the bed whilst you to are lips to lips, San can't help himself but to rush. He even throw the plushies you have on bed just to give way for you to get into position.
"I love my weekends with you..." he says as he nibbles your neck. "No..." he gives you a smooch on your shoulder. "I love all the days I spent with you..." and a kiss on your cheek. "I love YOU."
You smile and nod, "I'll remember that."
"You should." He kisses you on the lips. "Always."
Then before you could open your mouth to repeat the word 'always' he had his length already aligned to your entrance. You felt his tip touch you and it made you melt already. His tip is so warm and when he pushes it in, you felt your insides move.
"Oh... God..." your mouth opens into on O.
He is so fucking thick. You have been dating for more than a year now and you are still getting surprised on how thick he is.
"Tell me if it hurts... I didn't prep you... I got so excited..."
"It's fine..." you smile and pull his face for a kiss.
Sex with Sannie is so satisfying. It's not just sex for him, it's really something you've never felt from anyone you have dated in the past. He is making you feel love in every thrust.
It may sound weird but it is true.
"Aaahhh..." his mouth drops opens and exhales as he felt you squeeze him inside  "l-love... aaaahhh..." he closes his eyes as he slows down his movement. "Fuck... I might not last long anymore..." he then stretches his arm to reach for the bedside drawer
"Don't..." you say catching your breathe. "It's okay..." you say
"Are you sure?"
You nod.
"But your.... fertile..."
You laugh when you realized what he just said. "Baby... I can't...how did you know that?"
"Of course... I know... I should know..." he hugs you and kisses you more whilst slowing down his hip movements to control a little bit more. "I know you are not ready yet... and it's part of my job.. being your boyfriend... to know your needs..."
"Aww..." you tap his nose lightly and then raise your legs to wrap it around his waist. "Thank you..." you whisper. "Give it to me now then..." you add
"What?" He is frowning but smiling. "Love, are you... serious?"
"Yes... If it's alright with you... if ever... after this... we get a little mini you and mini me..."
"Fuck yeah!" He sucks you lower lip. "I want us to have children... more people to show love and appreciation for your existence.. and I promise..."  picks up his rythm up again. "I will raise our kids with so much love.. and...and..." he opens his mouth to take quick breathes as he feels his climax coming. "Love... ahhh... Aack! Shit!"
You feel his dick pulsate and pump in you. Its warm and its quite a lot.
He snorts a laugh as he lays on top of you while you caress his head. "What's funny now?"
He pushes himself back up, "you mention children already..."
"Hmm..."
"So does this mean..."
"Mean what?"
"You want to spend a life with me? Forever?"
You smile, "Of course..."
San can't hide the pure happiness in his smile. "Just tell me when, where and how... I'll marry you..."
"I don't need a fancy wedding... All I need is you..." you say
"Ditto..." he lays his head on your chest. "But about the baby..."
"What about it?"
He looks up at you again, "just to make sure... can... we... go for one more?"
181 notes · View notes
seventhcallisto · 10 months
Text
Chapter 111 — "meet me halfway."
—Deep Down.
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Toc/cw: I want to apologize for the title, but I'm not going to *evil cackling*. Reader is oblivious fr. I love karaoke, you love karaoke, we all love karaoke. Cringe karaoke scene, but idc, karaoke is sexy. You can not tell me ateez doesn't love to be coddled and loved on. suggestive, kissing, yes. kissing. This chapter is all over the place I apologizeeeeee.
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A lot of things can happen in the span of two weeks. You know that more than anyone. The boys aren't mad. For some reason, they aren't upset with you either. You want to ask why, but you like the way things have almost gone back to normal. Almost.
It's a week before your heat. You don't think about the effects that are gonna start taking place soon.
Consistently, mingi takes over your bed almost every night and is back in his by the morning. When you ask why, he gets embarrassed. "Can't i sleep in your bed?" You don't know if he gets up because someone keeps kicking him out, or it's just mingi wanting to give you space. You dont live in mingis' mind, so you'll never know. You share the left side with him. It smells just like mingi, lots of mingi, so much so you have the hintest smell of him on you in the morning, sea salt and jasmine. He also moves way too much, yet he somehow never kicks you.
If you happen to wake up in the middle of the night, you will definitely find him with his arm over your head, and you tucked into his chest. If you can, you'll scoot over before he notices. And by the time you wake up, he'll be gone.
Luckily enough, you're the only one with a single room. Everyone else has to share.
You rub your tired eyes stepping out of your bedroom. The sun glares around the living room right across from your door. You take your time walking over to the couch where jongho, wooyoung, and yunho stare at the screen. Each of their eyes shift to you as soon as you pop up from the side of it.
Bed hair, pajamas, and all of it in-between. You don't even flinch. They've seen you like this plenty of times before. There's not much room, so you take a spot on the carpeted floor. "What are you doing?" Wooyoung whines, leaning over jonghos' lap to pull at your shirt. Jongho looks used to him doing that, but he stares along with yunho at you. "I'm sitting," you pout back, pushing his hand off, not yet fully awake.
"Get on the couch, don't sit on the floor!" He leans further, tugging on you some more, his lip juts out, showcasing his true displeasure at the idea of you sitting on the floor. "No," you turn away, pulling out of his grip. You lay on the white carpet, arm tucked under your head. Wooyoung harshly whispers to himself. You know he's probably cursing at you for being stubborn.
It's the big break before the agonizingly long comeback. Actually, thanks to you, the deadline has been pushed back to accommodate the time off for your heat. The media doesn't know that. They only know you are still getting medically evaluated. You miss being okay enough to perform. You'll get that chance as soon as this is all over. And then you'll show them a real performance.
A heavy weight begins pressing on you, and you huff out your air, turning towards the couch. Slowly, wooyoung had crawled all the way over jongho(again, jongho doesn't flinch), and now he's lowering himself over you. Squishing you with his full weight.
On his back is a white blanket. He wraps it around you both. You have to turn on your hip and lay on your back so he doesn't crush you sideways in an awkward plank. "Woo," you groan. "You're crushing me," you pant out, pushing on his chest. He's got the sneakiest of grins on his lips. You're leveled at his chin. His leg falls over your hips, caging you in between his hoodie clad body and the grey sweat shorts he's wearing.
"I told you to get on the couch," he says matter-of-factly, resting on his palm that folloes his elbow right next to your head. This is very wooyoung to do to you, crush you with his body weight, and tease you mercilessly. You pout. "I didn't want to get on the couch" you squint your eyes at him.
"And I didn't want to get on the floor," he sighs, smiling through his pout. His head falls over you. His chin tucks you into his chest. You've escaped this hold before, but you are still tired, and wooyoung is a furnace compared to the cold wood that soaks through the carpet and nips at your back. Your singular arm that you can wiggle out wraps around his strong waist and sits on his back hips. The exposed skin there gets to you, and the closeness of his neck scent glands makes you want to sink further into him.
You rub soothing circles on his hip, unconsciously. Wooyoung takes a deep breath, the air from his nose hitting you on the top of your head. The TV is what everyone's attention is on. Yunho chews whatever snack he's gotten a hold of from the kitchen, jongho tucks himself into the free space wooyoung left. And you and wooyoung are taking synchronized breathes.
All is well in the stillness of the morning.
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Touchy, touchy lately are you and all of the guys. Even yeosang. Especially yeosang. Which - wow, really? Yeosang? Yes. Yeosang.
The practice room floor is another area you find yourself lying on randomly. You've caught up on all of your moves and anything you needed to drill into memory. At this point, you're just waiting for everyone to catch up. You watch them through the mirror, the echoing of the music thumping off the floor. Yeosang takes a seat next to you. He sits criss cross, leaning on his hands. His green and black hair frames his face.
You scoot up to place your head on his thigh, curling into his side. Your phone is in hand. Yeosang pushes it to the side with the back of his fingers, getting your attention. You look up to him. His smile is small. You know that look he has when he has a question to ask.
".. Where'd you go the first day after your heat?"
And there it is, surprisingly, yeosang is boldly asking. You turn into him further, sliding your phone down into your sweater. You bury your face into him. Mumbling into his shirt. "What?" He asks, grabbing the back of your head. His hand palms your stray hairs down. He didn't hear what you said.
"I went to the girls.." You grumble, peeking for his reaction. If he had one, you couldn't tell. Yeosangs hand falls into a rhythm, patting and brushing your hair down. He pulls a piece of hair behind your ear, blinking down at you nonchalantly.
"Did you.." yeosangs words fall out. He takes a deep inhale. "Did you call on them?" He whispers, his hand trails to your back. You shake your head quickly, "No.. no," you sigh, closing your eyes. "Actually, I didn't know who to call.. Ghostbusters?" You laugh at your own pathetic joke, yeosangs smile brightens up, a small huff of laughter as well. You turn to lean on your back, pushing his green hair behind his own ear.
"I didn't know who to call on." You repeat, your hands fall to your chest. "Hook up culture scares me, and I'd rather bite my tongue off," you laugh, he smiles. Yeosangs smile is something you'll never get used to, never get sick of. If only you knew he felt the same way about your smile. "Not a fan either," he mumbles. His spread out hand rests on your stomach. You take his palm in your own, wrapping both of your hands around it, and you turn back on your side facing him.
He watches you fiddle with his fingers, pressing them against your own. You hear him inhale before he goes to speak. San cuts him off, with the smack of his palm against yeosangs shoulder. He takes his place by your hip. He pulls your legs onto his lap, holding them flush to his waist. The bend is awkward until you shift back onto your back. "Done already?" You tease, looking at the way sweat drips from his forehead.
"Done? We're just getting started," he laughs.
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You love karaoke. Especially on nights like this. Where all the guys aren't extremely tired and willing to put up with mingi, you, and wooyoung begging for it. Especially you. Most definitely you. You love getting your way. Sparkling mic in hand, swaying to the funky but loveable beat of the early 2000s.
"Can you meet me halfway? Meet me halfway." You belt, leaning into it. Laughter consumes you. You take the stage in front of the led screen by yourself even though it's a duet. You know the english lyrics like the back of your hand, but the guys don't. So you're solo on this one.
The rap is your specialty. You put your own spunk on it, swaying your hands and hips to the beat. The all familiar urge to run your hand all the way down yourself to emphasize your deep feelings for the lyrics. The sweats hongjoong gave you to wear hang low on your hips.
"Right at the borderline is where I'm gonna wait- for you -" You point at the guys on the couch, piled up and cheering you on. All eyes once again fall on you, but you're still in your own little world. You're so very grateful you do this for a living. You miss touring. You sway back and forth, getting into the groove.
Your hips follow their own path, and you'd surely have a career in belly dancing with the hip control you have. You lean over, singing into the mic.
"I want you so bad- it's my only wish." You finish off, with twenty seconds of instrumentals you decide to just dance the rest away. Back and forth, you twirl and fall into a rhythm. Eyes closed. The led lights from the tv shape you out perfectly. Swaying back and forth because you're kinda embarrassed that you got so into it.
You take a deep breath, the mic falling to your side as you hold it in your hand. You lean back, looking over your shoulder for the killing pose. You don't even mention the stares. When you bow, everyone seems to shake out of their trance, cheering loudly to the point you know there will be noise complaints.
"Thanks. I'll be here all night!"
You pass the microphone off to wooyoung. Stealing his spot on the squished couch, San is on your left, and on his left is yeosang. On your right is hongjoong, and on his right is yunho. San slips closely, his thigh presses into yours, and you wiggle out of the squish zone. When you do, you semi-slip onto his lap. His hip holds your leg up to the point that you have to shift your other leg under you to get comfortable. You try but fail.
"San, scoot over." You huff, he stops talking to yeosang and turns towards you. He tries buts its no use, yeosang even attempts to help, he gives up though and covers his hand over his mouth to hide his smile. There's no more room on the couch, "sorry" san laughs, "wow, laughing at my misery, thanks" you try to lift your hips, struggling through the cushions and trying to avoid accidently smacking someone with your elbow. San is scooting the best he can, denying your claim with a pout. Wooyoungs voice begins with mingis, an energetic song they scream and laugh to.
"Here," san grabs you, his fingers spread over your waist and hips. He spreads his legs so you can sit between them. He lifts you like you weigh absolutely nothing. You try to help, but he's just moving you and himself to the point that you both are comfortable. He scoots flush to the couch, giving you as much room as possible so you dont squish or rub up against his.. Bits, you're assuming. It's comfortable enough that you don't have to worry about falling off the edge, but just to be safe, you lean back into Sans chest.
"Better?" He asks, his head falling over your shoulder, his breath fans your neck, pulling a slight shudder out of you. His thick arms tighten around your waist just under your boobs. You laugh, trying to ease the tension in your stomach, turning towards him. "we need a bigger couch," he laughs along, leaning over you, now watching wooyoung and mingi sing. San smells like white musk, wood, cedar, and earthy tones, deceitfully, there is the scent of dark chocolate under all of it. You lean into his shoulder, letting your head rest against it. His neck is right next to you, one slight turn, and you could kiss it.
You wiggle a bit, sans sharp breath next to your ear, makes you clear your throat. "Sorry." You lean forward, his hands move down to encircle your waist. Pulling you back. "It's fine, just.. don't move, please," he hushly says, squinting his eyes, his throat bobs when he swallows thickly. His cheeks are dusting pink from the corner of your eyes. The rest of the guys' hollering serves as background noise. Sans scent is a little heavier, but you can't tell if it's because you're so close. The deep chocolatey undertone makes your mouth salivate. You swallow it down. Sans hands are tight against you, pushing you as close as you can get, chest-to-back wise.
His left hand slowly slips down to your thigh. It perks there as if he's waiting for your approval. In front of everyone, distracted or not, San is showing a lot more affection than you know what to do with. You freeze when his breath fans your neck. His chin digging into your shoulder.
He's quickly ripping himself away from you. You jump when he begins clapping, hooting at their finished bow. Mingi lays on the floor spread out, and you laugh to ease the tension wracking your body. When did mingi even get on the floor? He pants and yells a jumble of words. Wooyoung pats his knee and walks back over. "I'm done," he says seriously, shaking his head. He takes his water off the table next to the couch on yeosangs' side.
He slips his muscular thighs onto your lap whilst he lays his whole body weight on yeosang. You stroke your fingers over the ever-growing patch of hair on his thigh, and wooyoung looks at you from the corner of his eyes. You can't distinguish the emotion on his handsome features. "Movie time?" Hongjoong asks, bringing your attention to him when he pats your arm.
For whatever reason, he's asking you specifically. "Yea, who's picking?" You ask, looking up at the taller alpha. His lip sticks out in thought. "You always have the best choices." You shake your head. "That's not true," you mumble, lips curling into a pout.
"Everyone here has good choices.. Oh! Let's all put a paper in a hat"
After coming out of his shared room, jongho won the draw, and because of it, he's pronounced as the winner of the night. He takes you with him on the couch, letting you curl into his side. His arm falls over your forearm, you have his hand in your own hands, his other arm props his head up on his fist. You lean almost completely into him, resting your head on his shoulder-chest zone.
You can see how his eyes grow distant with sleepiness. He's pushing through, though. You silently turn your head to him, "You can go sleep," you whisper. His eyes flutter to you, and he inhales gently, pulling his head off his palm to look at you straight. "No." He shakes his head. "It's okay if you're tired, I can just make an excuse-" "I want to be with you tonight." He's silent even as you stare. The TV flashes across his face when he takes your eyes with his. He means what he said.
His tired eyes shift down your face, landing on your lips. "Will you sleep in my bed?" He sighs out, staring with the heaviness in his eyes he usually saves for performances. His boba eyes shift from each of your own pupils. You inhale a breath, pulling your lips into a shy smile. "Yeah, do you want me to bring my stuffies too?" You say to make him laugh, his lip pulls up into a grin. He finally closes his eyes and rubs his fingers near the inner tear duct of his left eye.
"You can bring whatever, as long as you're there, I'm happy." He mumbles sleepily. You smile, standing up from the couch and stretching.
Whatever this situation you're currently in, you don't know what kind of friends do this or make it seem so romantic and domestic. Jongho just wants you to be comfortable, but you want him to be comfortable. So now, with your blanket and your childish stuffed whale(a fan gave you), you stand on the left side of jonghos' small bed. Arguing with him.
Jongho, just tired. Takes the floor with his blankets and bean bag in hand. "When you said sleep in my bed, I thought -.." You flush at your own assumptions. You can't see jongho on the other side. You can only hear him when he talks, shuffling to get comfortable. He stops abruptly at your words. Whispering in the dark. "You want to lay together?"
His roommates, hongjoong and wooyoung, are still currently watching the movie. They know you two have slipped off to bed. You didn't tell them exactly what you were doing, though. Secretly going to have a sleepover in the room where three alpha men sleep at night, the musk in the room is insanely drowning. You try not to dabble on the specifics of the scents.
"Yes, .. well- i did" you bite your own tongue. God, you sound so desperate right now. Begging jongho to share his bed with you and to actually lay with him in it. "Nevermind -" you take back, jongho stops you. Popping up from the right side of his bed. His hair is messy, eyes wide, but then reserved. He clears his throat. Smoothing his hand over the blanket and getting on it.
You stare for a few seconds. "Well?" He asks, his ears are beginning to turn red as each second passes. You bite your smile. Shuffling onto the bed next to him, you fall right into his side. But try to subtly shuffle yourself under the duvet. You wiggle to get comfortable. Jonghos bed is comfortable yes, but with him next to you. You're starting to think it's heavenly.
Jongho shuffles awkwardly, trying not to bump into you while he sits atop the comforter. You begin laughing into the blanket, watching him struggle to be polite in the tight spot that is his own bed. You sit up, letting the blankets pool around your waist. You reach over the left side of the bed where you dropped your own blanket. Jongho leans over to catch your arm.
"Careful," he clicks his tongue, and you swiftly reach up and let the blanket cascade down on jongho. A fuzzy royal purple blanket a fan also made for you. It smells exactly like your omega scent. Jonghos eyes widen for a split second. He clears his throat, throwing it around him until it reaches his neck.
"Thank you," he says shyly. You smile, digging yourself into his duvet once again. Jongho has a blanket that smells just like you, and you're under jonghos' blanket that smells like him. You don't forget he's right next to you, taking over your senses. You face him while he faces the ceiling.
"Jongho?" You call quietly, he hums, eyes shut. You bite your lip, withholding your question. Should you ask him now? When the question could make things awkward? But this back and forth thing with all of them, is it really something you'll be able to deal with when the time comes to not have them with you? You really want to know, though. Want to know what he's thinking and what they're all thinking. And now that he's at his sleepiest and most compliant, you want to ask more than anything.
"About my heat.. " You sigh and breathe deeply. "Would you have helped if you had known? in the practice room?" You whisper. Jongho shifts in his spot. You can see his hand clench over the blanket, it's silent for two minutes.
"Yea," he finally sighs out. "I would, of course, anything you'd need.. I'd get for you in an instance.. you wouldn't have to wait." You hear his breathing deepen.
"I'd take care of you." His sleepy voice says in the dark of the room. Your eyes fall over him again. His chest rises and breathes deep, slow, methodical breaths. Was he.. Asleep?
"Jjongie?" You lean up to look at him, squinting to adjust to the dark. He's completely passed out. The confession was from pure exhaustion. You wonder if he'll remember it in the morning. Your heart thumps loudly in your ears.
You have more questions than answers, Yet how are you gonna get real answers from everyone else without making it terribly hard?
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"Hongjoong," you laugh, pulling away from his tight grip, his fingers once again grip your sides. Dragging you along with him to his laptop, left open on the couch. "Just one minute of your time! Please!" He laughs out, calling your name in a chant. You've been avoiding feeding into hongjoongs overworking attitude, even when you guys are due to comeback and everything has been set in stone. He's still working. You don't even want to look at another screen of beats and codes and orange, red, blue blocks that distinguish what sound is which.
"I'm not going to be in the demo! We're supposed to be relaxing!" You scold, trying to grab his hands from your sides. "Please, you have the perfect set of vocals for it," he whines, begging for you to just say yes. "At least listen to it first. You know I value your opinion most." He lays it on thick, coercing you to say yes, he still tries to tug you away from your marching towards the kitchen.
You click your tongue, pushing at his hands again. "What's in it for me, huh?" You want a bribe. Holding onto the counter and anchoring yourself there. "Anything! I'll do anything!" He says quickly, jumping on the balls of his feet. Hongjoongs grasp is strong. You doubt he knows how hard his fingers dig into your sides. You throw your head back, turning in his grasp to look him in his eyes. "You said anything! No take backs!" You huff, pushing past him and sitting in his spot on the couch.
He follows right on your tail. He snatches the laptop off the spot and sits in it. Hongjoong fumbles with the headphones, slipping them onto your ears for you. You look at him, amused. He's ever eager to show you what he's been working on. "Intro," he gulps, moving his finger to click play.
The ever familiar distinction of beats and hums meet your ears. It changes, heavier this time. You can feel the rhythm in your bones, bopping your head along. You hold the headphones closer to your ears. Watching hongjoongs face to see what he's thinking, he stares at the laptop. Pushing on his lip with his tongue.
The rest of the song isn't as different. The beats change and mix up, but not so much so it's a complete change. When it's finished, hongjoong pauses. Looking up at you through his lashes. "So?" He asks. You smile, shaking your head as you slip the headphones off. "I like it"
The look in his eyes is familiar, the distinctive look of not thinking its enough. You've seen it plenty of times before in his eyes. And every time, he never takes what you say seriously. "I was thinking of switching the chorus with -" he rambles on. You watch him do so, listening silently. You hope he knows you're always listening to what he says. Your hand reaches out to his wrist, his hand stops clawing at the laptop.
He looks up, sighing heavily. "It's really good, hongjoong. I like the difference it has, the way things switch up." You say. Humming the beat back to him.
The sudden nostalgic feeling hitting you like a train drags you back to the memory of meeting hongjoong for the first time. When you barely knew a lick of Korean and he was trying his best to communicate to you about something he was working on. The first two trainees at KQ Ent. Communication was the hardest thing for you.
Hongjoong speaks in riddles to you. You don't know anything about South Korean traditions or mannerisms. Being here was impulsive, and the only person who could talk to you was the manager named jongsik. You nod along as if you get it, hongjoong moves papers off the desk he's at. Making some room for you. Young, immature you helps him do so, stacking the papers.
Once cleared off, hongjoongs chair bumps yours so he can grab the stack of papers you just organized. You hold onto the sides to balance it. He picks out sheets and shows them to you. Musical notes and hangul you can hardly read is messily scribbled on the page. You look up to him expectedly. His eyes shine back at you, locking you in the darkness of them.
He hums a tune under his breath, hoping you'll get it and follow it. You hum back, the same tune he just made.
Hongjoong looks down at your lips. He must have remembered the same fond memory you hold dearly. He hums the tune, eyebrows pulled taunt under the bangs of his brown hair. You smile at him. "It's perfect joong," you shut his laptop, taking it from his lap. He let's you, finally listening to what you say.
"You'll sing it then?" He asks, turning towards you. You run a hand down your arm, hiding the laptop behind you. "Mhm," you nod. Hongjoong smiles, going to reach behind you for his laptop.
You fall against the arm of the couch, caging it between you and the couch. "No, you can't have your laptop back - because! You promised!" You struggle against hongjoong attempting to pull it out from under you. He knees over you, placing it between your hip and the couch. "Let me check it real quick!" He whines, trying to dig his hands between your sides.
Theres a few seconds of you laughing at hongjoongs struggle and hongjoong huffing and laughing as well. Finally, he takes a deep inhale and laughs, his lips pulling into a grin. His hands are placed on either side of your head now as he leans over. "Okay, What's your wish?" he asks, huffing. His breath fans your face. Close in proximity.
"Uhm.." You pretend to think about it, placing your hands on his shoulders. You make eye contact, then look away. "I have .. a question," You mumble, pulling your hands off his shoulders. Hongjoong doesn't move from above you. He doesn't even notice what he's doing. Pressing his knee on the inner part of your left thigh whilst his other presses against your left hip, practically straddling you. You shuffle, pulling your left knee up. You lightly graze your knee against his stomach, just above the button on his jeans.
Hongjoongs throat bobs when he swallows dryly. His beautiful dark eyes look between your own otherworldly eyes. your hands fall on his forearms, glancing up at him. How do you ask what you need to ask? How?
"Can i kiss you?"
Your jaw falls slack, taking in a sharp breath. He's slowly turning pink around the ears. He takes his bottom lip between his teeth, looking between your eyes and your lips. "What?" You whisper. He takes a shuttered breath.
"Can I kiss you?" He asks again, more quietly this time, you hear the fabric scrunch next to your head from under his hard grip. You inhale slowly. Looking down at his own plump lips. Everything in this moment is real. You can feel the heartbeat in hongjoongs arm from your firm grip pounding against your fingertips. Your eyebrows scrunch.
How long have you both been waiting for this?
You quiet his racing thoughts, pulling him down into you. That should be a good enough answer, you think. Your lips smack dab into his, melding perfectly. Like they were designed to be there. You tilt your head up to hongjoong while he tilts his down into you. Meeting you halfway. His hand pulls you up into him. Placed gently at the base of your neck. It's odd. The taste on hongjoongs lips is heavy with vanilla. When you move in tandem, the blend of pear tingles your taste buds. Hongjoongs other hand holds him up, and yours fall around his neck, coddling him closer.
Hongjoong nostrils flare as he inhales, the sound bubbling in his throat. He softly prods your top lip with his tongue. You part for him. Letting him explore the cavern that's your mouth. The soft sound he lets out has you responding with your own. Eyebrows crease forward. This is suffocating in all the best ways, leaning into his touch and having him and only him consume you right now. The anxiety of the question completely lifts in hongjoongs embrace.
You pull back to breath, and he follows for one more. Just one, pulling your sticky lip with his own one final time. You heave in his presence. Eyes softly opening. Hongjoongs eyes are heavy, full of adoration, and unspoken words. He stares down at you. His breathing evens out softly. You take each other in. Both dazed.
"Is this real?" He asks, breathing softly. His eyes glance between yours, begging for the truth. You nod. "It's real, we're real." Your hand caresses the back of his neck, playing with the hair there. Hongjoong makes a noise, a somewhat strangled one. His hands curl into your waist, pulling you into him completely, gently. His head falls into your neck as he sinks down onto you. Falling onto your leg. Like you've just drained his soul. "Good," he murmurs, kissing your shoulder softly.
You pull him just as close. The silence doesn't hurt you, and neither does he say anything for a solid minute. "You didn't ask your question," he laughs into your shoulder, gently fanning his breath across your most sensitive spot. You smile. "You answered it already," you say, brushing the hair on the nape of his neck down. He sighs into you.
"What does this change?" You whisper. He pulls back, looking down at you. His hand once again brushes under your head as his elbow props him up. "Everything and nothing," he shifts between your eyes, honestly speaking. "This can be whatever you want it to be" he finishes.
You shake your head. "What do you want this to be?" You ask. He looks back down at your lips, then to your eyes. "I.." he tries to read your face. "I want this to be more," he whispers, putting his heart on the line.
"I want you. I want to be yours."
An alpha admitting such feelings, even when he's supposed to withhold them because its shunned. It's honest and completely true. When he wants to be taken in as a partner, your partner. The one seeking out instead of being sought out. He's the one asking you. Feelings the reversed roles. You nod, taking his words into your heart.
"I want you too. I want to be yours too." You whisper, leaning up to kiss the corner of his lip. "But.." You silently say, knowing you have to be true, he looks at you, worry in his frown. "I love you as much as I love all of our pack," you confess to the pack alpha.
"More than friends," your voice cracks, withholding the waterfall behind your eyes. They blur with unsheded tears. Hongjoongs face going blurring. His hand from behind your head comes up. Calling your name softly. you feel bad, like what you want can't be said. Like it's shameful. Hongjoong pulls away, grounding his knee back into the couch.
He's leaving, you think. He's doesn't think it's okay. Your lip trembles, and your eyes grow the most blurry.
Hongjoongs' hands come up to hold your face. His thumbs swipe under your eyes, pushing the tears out of your vision so you can see him clearer. "That doesn't matter to me," he frowns, and you inhale a sob. "I knew you did, I can tell. I don't mind sharing with them." he laughs towards the end, hoping to stop your silent tears.
"Don't cry," he shushes with a grin, pulling you back into him. You try to stop yourself. He kisses the side of your head multiple times.
He feels the same, and he's willing to involve the members into your very personal, very small, intimate pack dynamic beginning to blossom. God, are you special? You're so happy.
"They like you too, you know." he bites his lip, kissing your lips gently. "We all really like you. It's why we never say anything with the affection. Even if they don't know it, I can tell." He smiles. You don't believe him, the oblivious hongjoong. Cute, sweet, clumsy, captain hongjoong. "How can you tell?" You ask, rubbing your thumb down his cheek.
"Intuition," he hums.
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For 3 days, you've been keeping things under wraps with joong. You love him lots. But it's too early to say so. And it's especially hard to hide the flushed looks and the loving glances. You both are trying to find a way to get a confession from the rest of the guys or to see if they feel the same way about the situation. It's odd, though. Having hongjoong, your.. boyfriend? Go out of his way to personally help you know if your other group members like you.
You truly wonder if he does like the idea of sharing you amongst your group, not in a possessive way, more so in a theres-more-than-enough-of-you-to-go-around way
The new feelings are strange and scary, one wrong move. One slip up, and you're ruining your friendship you've worked years to build. You highly doubt that will happen, though. You doubt you will ever want to leave hongjoong. You hope he feels the same.
Lately, San and wooyoung have hit the town, coming back tipsy. You make it obvious you're taking care of them, leaving hangover pills and water by their bedside table like some worried sick roommate. You struggle as you turn San on his side. Frowning at the scent of alcohol on his clothes. You slip his blanket over him, watching his sleepy and droopy eyes blink up at you.
"Omega," san whines, reaching his hand out to grab you. You sigh and sit back on your heels. "Yes, san," you answer, grabbing his hand from mid-air. You've got to be quiet due to the other roommates in the room, passed out, and completely tired from a long day. "Wait," he slurs, kicking the covers off of him. "San!" You go to stop him. He doesn't care. You grab his arms to steady him, watching his face shudder as nausea hits him.
He leans right into your chest, digging his face into you. "'mega, i'll take care of you." You could almost laugh. You're currently taking care of incompetent san, who's completely blackout drunk, who definitely doesn't know what he's saying or that he's squishing his face as close to your boobs as he can get. "I know," you reassure. "Me and woo will do it..." he mumbles the rest under his breath.
"You and woo will do what, sanie?" You try to ask, watching him droop down into you, San does weigh a good amount based on how much muscle he's packed on lately. You haven't been hitting the gym, so you're somewhat struggling to hold him up right now. You huff as you lean him back over into the bed, he wraps his arms around your back, dragging you onto the bed next to him.
You sigh, trying to lean away. "Me, you, woo, maybe yeosangie," he mumbles "everyone" he sighs into your stomach. You feel the heat of his head pressed there. San digs his face into you some more, rubbing his head back and forth across you. Nonsense spills from his lips, and you wonder why you even tried to distinguish it.
"Don't go," he whines as he feels you attempt to pull away. "San, we both have to sleep," you explain the best you can. He shakes his head into your shirt, pulling back to look at you. "Stay," he says earnestly.
"Fine, fine," you grumble, slipping into the bed next to him. Your head leans up against his pillows, whilst his lays on your stomach, clenching into your side. At least he's not on his back where he could choke. But you don't want to think about him throwing up on you either. Your hand strums through his red hair, separating knots gently. Sans breathing evens.
You can hear him mumble every once in a while. His hand clutches your thigh, holding it to him as if you'll escape. Using it to ground himself from the world spinning. He calls your name softly, shifting his head further up to look you in the eyes. "Yes?" You answer back.
"I saw your papers," he sighs. "The heat assessment ones, with hongjoongs name on it" san sounds sober as he says it. Your eyes widen. You know you left that paper in your room. You know you hadn't properly hid it, and when hongjoong saw it in your room. He signed to with your permission. A growing flush to his cheeks as he did so, his beautiful signature locked into your paperwork.
"san, I -" he cuts you off. "Put our names down," he ushers, squeezing your thigh as he says it. He looks up, squinting his eyes. "I talked with Woo and Yeosang about it. They don't want to say it, so I will." he sits up, swaying. The bed dips under him.
His hands land softly on either side of you when he sits on your left. "You can put our names down, i want you to, they want you to, i- if you want to," he emphasizes every word.
"No one else, no other alphas, betas, whatever, no one other than our pack should touch you during your heat. You're off limits to everyone else. You're ours. And I'll bite their heads off for even thinking about it."
You don't think san can bite anyone's head off. But the way he says it is as if he's trying to be as scary as possible. Instead, he's whining through his words, and it almost sounds as if he's scolding you. His eyes squint at you, tapping your leg before he falls back over your stomach.
"If you want to." He says, making sure you know he's not taking the option away. He's just jealous it's even an option. "If you remember this in the morning, you can write your name on the paper, all of you," you make a deal, hoping this will stay and if it doesn't then you know san didn't mean it.
"I give you my full permission to write your names if you remember." You bite your lip. Is this right? You trust these guys more than anyone. More than any hookup, more than any alpha, you know. You know they will not break your trust. Because they're your pack. They're your members. If they don't want it, they don't have to sign it. They don't have to agree if they don't want to.
And you know if san remembers, he can have the choice to pretend he didn't or to go through with it.
You won't know until they sign it tomorrow.
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A/n; omg... leaving it on a cliffhanger again(I'm terrible)pls don't hate me this isn't proof read either ;"c next update will take more than a few days so I can gather the storyline and get everything ready before the big heat.(stay tuned)
taglist: @lelaleleb @bratty-tingz @0325tiny @smilefordongil @atinytinaa @yunholuvrsblog @ja3hwa @stopeatread @sousydive @voicesinmyhead-rc @giiouis @c4tboyxiao @eastleighsblog @doggopepper @uhhheather @hyukssunflower (if I forgot to tag you (I'm sorry I'm new to this) :( please lmk!!)
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