#autisticandmad

[vizthedatum]

Look, autism, ADHD, and the rest of the neurospicy states of being ARE NOT A TREND.

I have struggled to function my whole life.

I struggle without support.

I’m gonna have problems with communication.

It’s hard to read body language and due to my trauma, I overthink, over analyze, and try to “percept” my way into *reading* people.

I do that because it can drive me wild not to know.

I’m gonna have meltdowns!

Sometimes this and my depression/anxiety/trauma can get so in my way that I can’t take care of myself.

I get away with it because I’m “intelligent” or “pretty” or “quirky.” Right? Like that’s what y’all say, right? “oh you can’t be autistic, you’re too social with a high IQ”

IQ is fake. Autistics can be social. And we are hella gorgeous, every single one of us.

But like yeah, I’m a cutie with degrees, but I’m also a fucking person with needs that you* choose to ignore and can’t meet.

And then y’all think I’m “crazy” or whatever while you’re the one wildin’ to my reactions… to my REALITY.

And then I mask and watch while you have your own meltdown about how I can’t be trusted to do shit.

And that’s how all of you lose me. (Or I have a meltdown and leave because the triggers and uncomfortable-ness and feelings got too overwhelming for me, and I don’t know how to communicate without help and guidance)

I can do stuff. I am also autistic in a world where people are awful and dishonest and not straightforward with their intentions… a world that is not that accessible to me and leaves me with high anxiety all the fucking time.

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*you refers to work places, institutions, friends, colleagues, lovers, ex-partners, family (omfg), etc.