#at the heart of it all is someone so shaped by circumstance that we don't even know where the Situation ends and the person begins
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yappacadaver · 1 year ago
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i s2g no one gets my feelings on raymond like INSYM does
WHO ELSE is going back into this game saying shit like "i kinda just want to see raymond. should we get the fuck you raymond ending? lets kill him I want to kill him. lets end on a banger and kill raymond for the last ending."
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the-ineffable-dance · 10 months ago
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Throughout both seasons of Good Omens, I adore watching how Aziraphale and Crowley show their love for each other. They each have a different set of needs that the other knows about and validates... Crowley is big on giving Aziraphale Acts of Service. Aziraphale leans more towards Physical Touch.
But one thing that they both give the other is possibly the most important for our two man shaped beings... Words of Affirmation.
It's easy to see when Crowley does this for Aziraphale, and I think it's quite easy to see when Azi both needs those words and also how dramatically he responds to them.
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He doesn't just enjoy Crowley praising him... he needs it. Heaven has been brutal to Aziraphale. They have never had a kind word for him... instead they belittle him and mock him at every turn.
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Imagine that THIS is what you are given for thousands and thousands of years. No matter what you say, no matter what you do, THIS is the response. Nothing is ever good enough. EVER.
And then, you meet a demon. And he listens to your ideas. He sees you for who you are. And he never mocks you. He listens. He accepts you. And he tells you that you're doing good things, that you're smart, that you're clever. That you have value.
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Look at that face!!! Look how much it means to him! Even with six thousand years together, Aziraphale is ready to be mocked, and when Crowley encourages him, it is everything!
Even waaaaay back, in the Garden. They hardly knew each other, and yet already we have this affirmation that Aziraphale desperately needs.
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What might be more difficult to see is how Aziraphale gives Crowley Words of Affirmation that HE needs just as much. It's much more subtle, but Crowley needs them, and Aziraphale provides.
Crowley's entire existence is a delicate balancing act. Inside, he is at heart a good person. He didn't lose that in his Fall like many of the other demons. We can see his kindness in a thousand small ways... his concern for children, his love of Aziraphale, following Hell only as far as he can... But imagine. He's a demon of Hell. Surrounded by people who think words like kind, nice, love are "four letter words." And the punishment for that kindness is not just mockery, but it's physical, brutal. How easy would it be to lose those parts of yourself just out of pure survival?
And then, you meet an angel. And he sees you for who you are, deep down, all the little things that you had to hide away. And he says it out loud, so you know that he sees it and accepts it and appreciates it. And he helps keep those parts of you you cherish alive.
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Aziraphale is the only person that validates those parts of Crowley. And even if Crowley reacts negatively to it either out of fear that they're being listened to or even just habit, he still hears it.
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Okay, he reacts REALLY badly to it... but Aziraphale never stops saying it, either. He knows deep down just how much Crowley needs him to say it.
Kind, nice, these are the most common of Aziraphale's Words of Affirmation... but there is one that I think Crowley needs the most... the one that he himself brings up the least... the fear that as a demon he is truly unforgiveable. He is unreliable when describing his Fall through out the series, and I see that as a sign that it is something that eats away at him. No demon gets forgiven. Period.
But Aziraphale forgives him. Offers it to him over and over. (Ignore the final offer of forgiveness in S2... those circumstances are out of the ordinary).
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And when Aziraphale offers his forgiveness, I don't think that he's limiting it to whatever the surface reason is. Look at him... that's the face of someone who is trying to put as much meaning behind his words as he can. To reach that core of self-doubt that Crowley hides away, and ease the ache that is there. "You can be forgiven. You are worth forgiving. I forgive you, even if no one else does." We see throughout the series the forgiveness that Aziraphale offers start off pretty broad, and moves more and more intimate... from "May God forgive you" to "May you be forgiven" to finally "I forgive you." He refines his words until he finds what Crowley needs.
For both of them, the Words of Affirmation that the other provides is such an important part of their relationship! I'm thinking that soon I'll take a look at some of the other Love Languages that they use throughout the series. Until then!
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queers-gambit · 1 month ago
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All Mine
title citation: song by Brent Faiyaz
prompt: ( requested ) you and Tangerine break up, and the man you date after is a serious downgrade. on a night out, Tangerine decides your story isn't yet finished.
pairing: Tangerine x female!reader
fandom masterlist: Bullet Train
word count: 7k+
note: did i use this gif already? yes. but it fits the theme of this story.
warnings: same drill - Tan's government name is Aaron, Lem's is Brian. cheater!Reader (not on but with Tan, you'll see), some angst, break-ups, but overall hurt and comfort, happy ending, small NSFW, random "State Farm" quote (not sponsored), smoking indoors, brief domestic aggression, brief violence (it's Tan), term "going postal" used, not edited. "not all men" only applies to Tan i don't make the rules.
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We begin today by discussing the concept of soulmates.
World renowned Ancient Greek philosopher, Plato (born Aristocles, not to be mistaken for Aristotle), once theorized that humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and two faces. The Greek God, Zeus, motivated either by fear of man's potential power or the need to reprimand their arrogant pride, decided to punish humans by severing them into two perfect halves - dooming them to roam the Earth in search of their whole self.
According to Ancient Chinese mythology, The Red String of Fate (tied by the Lunar matchmaking God, Yue Lao) says lovers who are destined to be are tied together through lifetimes by a red string - the color that symbolizes happiness - regardless of time, place, or circumstance. This string might stretch or tangle (like all relationships), but will never break.
Some Western cultures believe in the idea of simple "soulmates", two people destined to meet and love one another unconditionally. They thought their souls are someway, somehow intertwined - be it in the stars, by the cosmos, or even some intrusive, baby-presenting, diaper-wearing, winged fucker named Cupid. "Soulmates" operate as two halves of one whole, yet still remain two separate individual persons. The idea originates from Plato's theory, but essentially affirms: there's a perfect someone for everyone.
Other cultures might say their religious deity or just faith in said religion is peoples one, true love. Some argue a "soulmate" isn't a romantic partner at all, but instead, a person's twin. You know, same womb, same "soul", that kinda reasoning.
Akin to the Greeks, theosophy claims God created androgynous souls, and these souls were individually split into the two genders they once were. Each half seeks the other, and when their karmic debt is paid (being a reason they were split in the first place), the two halves will return to their whole, true self.
and before anyone says anything about gender, remember, these theologies originate from a time that a modern day Taco Bell dollar menu burrito would literally make the theologists implode!
Some New Age philosophy says a soulmate is a totally separate entity (meaning, not split or derived from us), and who spends lifetimes as your friend, lover, co-worker, partner. Soulmates are the greatest union of the heart, no matter the shape or form it presents as; being two connected souls. Hence platonic soulmates, as well.
Other common literary soulmate idioms:
cut from the same cloth -> meaning being so in-tune and similar in characteristics, demeanor, and / or behavior, you "must've" come from the same place.
apple of my eye -> while, yes, it means being extremely important to a person, it also could mean being the "core" of your lover's heart and / or soul; similar to how an apple core keeps the fruit's integrity.
better / other half -> it's 2 am, this is pretty self explanatory.
ride or die -> again, self explanatory - but indicates that a soulmate will live life loyally with you in good and bad times.
match made in heaven -> being absolutely SO perfect for each other, your love was crafted by divine intervention in the eternal kingdom of heaven - where a thing or two about "soulmates" might be known.
my heart and soul -> your love being so strong, so right, it takes over logic and emotion; and intoxicates your very soul - your entire being.
No matter what approach you take, what you do or don't believed, there was no denying: Aaron was your soulmate.
That arrogant, smug, sarcastic, devilishly handsome, mysterious, devious, sneaky, alluring, intelligent, bitchy, suave, charming, intuitive, opinionated jackass who used the operative codename Tangerine.
But to you, he was Tan. Tangie. Aaron. Ace. The love of your life.
You couldn't avoid it. There was no wishing him away, no genie to appear for your third wish. There was no point in trying to avoid or deny your feelings anymore, they were an 18-wheeler and there was no crosswalk in sight; and that's where everything fell apart - realizing you were ready and willing for this emotion to come barreling into you. When things got serious, when you were ready for distinct, specific commitment, Aaron suddenly reared back and put so much distance between you, it was as if he catapulted into a different timezone.
You had been at a mutual friend's birthday party, and after several rounds of alcohol, where everyone was good and buzzed and happy in their own little worlds, incidentally toppled into a public showdown.
"What's the rush?" Aaron asked you, tears inconceivably dribbling down your cheeks one-by-one while stood in a packed-out bar. "Huh? What's your rush to get married? Things have been so good, doll - so fucking good - and you want to ruin that? This isn't - "
You barked, "'Ruin that'? Ruin, what, exactly!? Aaron, we've been together five years - five fucking years, half a bloody decade - how could you possibly say you don't know if you want to marry me or not yet!?"
"It's not you, love - "
"It's not me, it's marriage that scares you!?" You snarled, so used to hearing it, you can quote him.
"Yes!"
"It's the same difference! You love me, but marriage is so scary, it's not worth it, even with me! No matter how much you say you love me, right? You just can't - no, no! - you won't love me enough to marry me! Because you're capable of it, you're capable of loving me enough, but you're much more comfortable being an emotionless jackass - "
"No, no, don't go putting words in my mouth," he groaned, head tilting back, shaking his curls as he rightened to look at you. "Baby, just listen to me, please, neither of us are in a state to have this conversation - "
"We never are, according to you! It's never the right time, the right energy, right setting! What's the issue, Aaron? Huh?" You felt your anger crack and chip away like a hard boiled egg, revealing the soft emotion inside. "What's the real problem being with me? With marrying me?"
"We're just - we're so young!"
"Try again."
"You're just not thinking about - "
"Oh, no, but I am!" You snapped, setting your nearly empty glass to the bartop and shocking yourself (and the eavesdropping bartender) that it didn't shatter. "I am thinking, Aaron, I'm finally thinking about myself - for once - and I know what I want! And you know what? I'm not afraid anymore to ask for what I know I deserve!"
Aaron scoffed, shaking his head as he did when faced with confrontation. "Neither of us are drunk or sober enough to get though this conversation, so... Let's just..." He trailed, brows furrowing when you shook your head with a hateful scoff, yanked from his grip, and stormed away. But he quickly snatched your upper arm, halting your escape, demanding, "Wait, wait, wait, hang on, love. What are you doing? Where are you going?"
"Away from you - "
"They haven't even cut the cake, baby, c'mon, the night is still early - "
"Excuse me while I don't want to stand around here with my ex-boyfriend in front of our friends pretending to be happy."
"What're you - ex-boyfriend?" He stuttered in genuine hurt and confusion.
In that moment, like divine intervention to semi-prove your point, Brian, Aaron's brother, who used the codename Lemon, dropped in. Tangerine let go of you to not make it look like he was holding you in place. "S-Sorry, I know this looks tense, but, uh, bruva," Brian showed Tangerine his phone, "we've gotta go, man..."
"We're in the middle of something, Lem."
"I get that, but... Duty calls, mate."
Tangerine sighed, hand through his hair, turning to you in what you used to think was real empathy. "I-I'm so sorry, love, I have to go - but we'll finish this conversation when I get home, okay? Yeah?
You sniffled and nodded sadly, "See? You see? You love your job more than me, that literally in the middle of a fight about marriage, you're gonna go. Did you see how easy that was for you? Yet you can't love me enough? In a much less high-stakes situation?" With another nod, but this time out of realized confirmation, you breathed, "I'm done, Tangerine." He knew you were serious when you reverted back to his codename; stripping the personal warmth from your tone. "Okay? I'm done. I can't do this anymore, it's absolutely unfair. You've made it clear, you don't want to marry me, so, that's fine, but I'm not in the business of wasting anymore time than I already have. Now," you took a breath, "we can talk later about getting your shit outta my place, probably after your mission, but until then, just please, leave me the fuck alone."
You swore that was going to be the end. It was supposed to be. There was never supposed to be a relapse. Never an epilogue. The Tangerine / Aaron chapter was closed, the entire book was supposed to be closed!
But when you're single for the first time in five years, you kinda forget how to casually date.
There's dating apps, which, as some might know, is just a nightmare experience. There's sometimes local singles events - but they're not always the vibe you usually want to spend your energy on. Matchmakers were (apparently) thousands of wasted dollar. Dating coworkers is typically ALWAYS weird unless you're Jim and Pam, or Meredith and Derek, or whatever other couples TV romanticized. Reality dating shows? That air out all your business? PASS. Taking your mother's recommendations? PASS. Especially if she has her little "church friends" trying to set you up, too? HARD PASS. Sometimes, you just start praying for a hunky Italian Mobster to abduct you - it honestly sounds a little easier (read: this is sarcasm)! Your friends try to set you up, but it usually doesn't click, or it's a strange experience that makes you reject further offers. You could always hope a guy spills your coffee and offers to buy you a new one, which turns into you talk the day away - but life isn't a Glen Powell movie.
Oh, and don't even get me started on ghosting - fuck you if you ghost people, you immature coward.
So, sometimes, you get real lonely, start to feel a little self pity, like you made a mistake breaking up... And maybe you seek company in alcohol... And that alcohol can sometimes help you reminisce... Which exasperates the loneliness... And eventually, maybe that little devil on your should convinces your to text your ex... Which in turn, starts an entire precedent about it being "okay" to go back to him in times of need and desire, of desperation, sometimes of boredom, or even times of comfort.
Aaron had left you alone after the break up, he knew to give you space; so, when you start casually fucking about a year after ending things, it was you pulling all the strings. Women in power, ammirite? Though, Aaron didn't mind your use of him, he always thought the break-up was a fluke of some kind, something fleeting, temporary - hence why he left you alone to sort your feelings. Aaron knew he wasn't perfect, but neither were you; resulting in plenty of "negative" aspects of your relationship, but there were far more positives - more ups than downs - assuring you both know, this was real. This was love. This was true love. It was eternal and raw and passionate... But you couldn't wait forever for him to face his fears.
Until... One night, after hours in his sheets, from the side of his bed, you declared, "This was the last time, Aaron."
He watched you hook your bra, cigarette in his mouth. "Oh, yeah?" He mused, having heard it before. "All right, sweetheart. Same time next week, yeah?" Aaron laughed at his own joke, casually flicking ash into the bedside tray.
"No. I'm being serious, Ace," you sighed almost sadly. You stood to yank your panties and leggings up in one move; shifting your hips, wiggling a bit to adjust the feeling of tightly wadded cloth cutting through raw coochie. "Ryan and I, uh... We're, uh, you know," you cleared your throat, trying to situate your tee shirt without looking at him, "we're going exclusive."
"Uh-huh, is that so?"
"Yep."
"When was this decision made?"
"Oh, uh," you blanched, "the idea was proposed a couple days ago, but we're making it official tonight - "
"I've seen you 8 fucking times this week and it's only Tuesday - "
"I know - "
"What the fuck, Y/N!?"
You glared, "What do you want me to say, Aaron!?"
"That you're not being serious! We're supposed to be together, not whatever - "
"You knew that we were just fucking to blow off steam and fill certain voids, we weren't back together! You always knew one day, this was bound to happen."
"Why? Huh? Why fuck me, but date him?"
"Because you're allergic to committeemen and Ryan isn't!"
"So, why do you keep comin' around? Why keep comin' back t'me, huh? If he's willing to commit, why're you the one fucking around on him? With me?" But the look on your face said it all, making Aaron laugh spitefully, "Ohhh, no, oh, sweetheart. Oh, don't fucking tell me, doll, he's not fucking you right?"
"For fuck's sake, would you please get off your high horse a single moment just to fuck off - "
"Why else would you keep coming back?" He demanded, smug as could be. "Don't wanna date me, but you'll fuck me? Oh, poor Ryan must really be lacking - "
"I told you, this is the last time."
"Yeah, uh-huh, sure," he laughed, leaning back, hands behind his head. "They all always say that before they come crawling back in my bed."
"The fuck is that supposed to mean?" You snarled, feeling more hurt than you should've. And Tangerine could read it all over your face. "I told you every man I slept with - granted it's only been two this past year, but still - are-are-are you saying there's been others? That you haven't told me about? Have you been fucking other people while fucking me?"
"Hang on, love, listen, I didn't mean - "
"I think I need to go, this was a mistake - all of this - coming back here, fucking you. I need to go," you huffed, stepping into your Crocs (for a quick escape), and rushing to grab your jacket, purse, and keys. The entire time, Tangerine was trying to amend what he said, but it felt like the (final?) nail in the coffin you had been waiting on; assurance that you needed to be without Aaron. See, upon your casual fuck, you agreed to date and sleep with others if you wanted - you weren't exclusive - but for reasons deemed useless now, you were supposed to tell one another about other partners. And he couldn't even do that?
So, you left his flat, and when he followed you out, he saw you disappear at Olympic sped down the staircase - key to his place left on the hallway floor.
"Well, well," his elderly cougar neighbor leaned in her doorway, watching you go with crossed arms and a smirk, "looks like li'l miss is gone finally, huh? This mean you're available for dinner tonight?"
Tangerine snatched the key from the ground, "Not tonight, Mrs. Roberts."
"It's 'Ms' now," she informed, but Tan didn't even hear; just slipped inside his flat, shut the door, locked it, and stood in the foyer, palm flat, looking at the key as if it were a foreign object, for 37 minutes.
Knowing how upset you were, Tangerine didn't try to contact you. Yet one week after your fight, when he knew your standing "Soul Cycle" class took place and you'd came by after, he set up his flat. He got you dozens of apologetic roses all mixed with bright sunflowers and dotted with baby's breath - bouquets he put together himself. Candles lined the place, all lit within fire code restrictions. He played light, modern instrumental music because he knew it had been on your Spotify playlist - not that he was checking it or anything. He cooked your favorite meal by hand. He cleaned himself up, styled his hair, wore the cologne you got him for your first Christmas together (that he's never changed), and wore the baby blue button-up he knew drove you crazy. To top it all off, he got a very dainty golden bracelet - one that was nice enough to convey the amount he spent (as if money = sincerity of apology) but still simple enough that Ryan wouldn't notice if it became part of your normal jewelry box. In fact, nobody would - except you and Tangerine, the way he likes things. The bracelet is even engraved with a subtle 'A' because no matter who you date, he always knew you'd be his and he'd be yours - but wouldn't point this out to you... Yet.
Your class ends at 6:30, you were never later than 7:05. He was ready and waiting at the door, going over his apology by 6:15. He changed into a new, identical shirt at 6:33 after sweating through the first; drying himself, spraying extra antiperspirant over his torso. He changed the tissue wrapping of his offering bouquet so it wasn't wet from his sweaty palms when he gave it to you at 6:41. At 6:46, he began pacing. Aaron began impulsively checking his phone at 6:53. He didn't have your location anymore (a con to the break-up he strongly protested out of fear for your safety) so he couldn't check if you were lost, in trouble, in traffic, at that smoothie place you loved. 7:15 rolled around, no key in the lock. At 7:22, he called Brian in a panic.
"What's wrong? She's just late, Aaron, take a breath, mate."
"She's never late."
7:30 turned to 8... Then to 9... And finally, at 10, Tangerine realized you were serious - that was the last time together.
The hurt suddenly set in, realizing you're not coming back. Selfishly, he knew, he could fill a void no man - even one as objectively good as Ryan - could. He knew you must've felt lonely; craving adventure and spontaneity, something exciting that he knew you lacked with Ryan - or any man.
For days, he agonized - trying to get in your head.
Without him, were you lonely? His job makes him travel, but did Ryan ever take you anywhere? Did he surprise you? Open your doors? Send you flowers? Keep you waiting? Did Ryan communicate with you in the way Tangerine knew you preferred? Was he kind? ...Were you alone?
He knew for a fact, when together, no matter what, he never made you feel unloved, under appreciated, devalued, taken for granted, but perhaps that changed when he began his allergic reaction to the prospect of marriage.
Two years. Two years since breaking up. One year since you ended your Friends with Benefits situationship. One year, you've been with Ryan, and by God, did it drive Aaron insane. For months, Brian felt a responsibility for his part in pulling Tan away that night instead of leaving him to work things out with you, but his brother assured it was a long time coming... Though, Tan had to admit, he never thought it'd go this long.
Like a good neighbor, Jake from State Farm is there! But like a good brother, Brian is there to take Aaron out for a night of necessary debauchery. This was an otherwise mundane activity, something to blow off steam and remove oneself from reality - yet fate works in really funny ways.
The club Lemon chose was packed to the brim; stuffed with bumping, sweaty bodies; strung out to blaring music in various zombified states induced by drugs, alcohol, or maybe both. Luckily, their group had an elevated position in the club's VIP seating, keeping away from the dance floor; giving limited advantage in height when surveying the area.
That's how Tangerine saw you after a year.
Judging from the glittery sash and cheap tiara on your friend's head, he guessed you were there for a birthday party; feeling his stomach knot itself into a noose when he noted Ryan hovering around your flank. He wore khakis, loafers, a creased, pale yellow button-up he guessed was thrifted; holding his drink in one hand, the other shoved in his pocket, bobbing and nodding awkwardly to the thumping music.
When you moved, so he Ryan. When you threw back a shot, Ryan looked away with a long, heavy sigh and curled lip. When you tried to dance, Tangerine saw Ryan snatch your upper arm to reprimand directly in your ear; a couple of your friends even shooting him looks of distain.
A hand clapped heavily on his shoulder, Lemon appearing at Tan's side. "Only you would come t'a club, mate, crawlin' with babes, yeah?" He gestured to the scantily dressed women dancing provocatively around them with his hand holding a drink, "And stand here, like-like, you're Lurch or some shit!"
"'Lurch'?" Tangerine repeated, eyes never straying from where you were in an obvious disagreement with Ryan.
"Like - you know - from the Addam's Family? Tall fucker? Just stands 'round, leering?" Lemon listed intentionally, seeing his brother unmoving. "Jesus, fuck, mate, just go talk to her already! Swear, you stand here any longer, watchin' people, they'll toss us out 'cause of the complaints. Shape up, mate, time t'shit or get off the pot. Move it."
Tangerine finally adjusted his stance, sniffling, shaking his head, "Nah, mate, don't know what you're talkin' 'bout - "
"She's right fuckin' there," Lemon pointed, outing his brother completely, "and you've been a bitch for too long about this. When are you gonna get another chance like right now? Swallow your fuckin' pride, yeah? And just go talk to her! Go apologize! Get her back! 'Cause, just look at her, mate," Lemon paused, both watching you, "think she's happy with a bloke like that? Treats her like that? Only time I ever saw her look at you like that was the night youse two broke up..."
Lemon offered a pursed-lip-smile, patting Tangerine on the shoulder twice and backing up a couple paces. It was like he watched the final bit of confidence Tan needed inject itself into his heart; shoulders almost doubling in size as he shed his suit jacket too casually. Lemon materialized to accept it, laying it in their private booth as Tangerine lit up a cigarette, pocketed his solid gold cuff links, and began rolling up his sleeves while surging through the VIP section and into the general population.
Lemon followed swiftly, several others on their tail as the promise of excitement was too good to pass up.
"I'm telling you, you're being fucking embarrassing!" Ryan was heard snarling. "Let's go home before you make it worse! I have a reputation to protect, imagine what anyone would say if they saw my girlfriend acting like a fucking fool!"
"Oh, Jesus, I have two shots and you think I'm wasted? That I have to go home? You think you can treat me like I'm some child? I'm not going anywhere with you," you snapped back.
"I told you we'd be here an hour - it's past that - "
"Oh, for fuck's sake, it's a birthday party! We weren't ever going to stay just an hour!"
"You're embarrassing yourself, now let's fucking go!" Ryan grabbed you again to emphasize his point, but you didn't even get a chance to struggle because Tangerine was imposing himself between you; plucking his smoldering cigarette from his lips, French inhaling the smoke. Ryan snarled, forced back a step, "The fuck - "
"She said she's not going anywhere with you, so I suggest you walk away," Tangerine growled, smoke billowing from his lips.
"Who the fuck do you think you are?" Ryan scoffed, looking close to laughing.
"That's my girl you're fucking with, so, again, walk away," he lifted his cigarette for a puff.
"Tangie," you spoke gently, holding the back of his designer black shirt and gently tugging him backward, "Tangie, c'mon, baby, back up, let it go."
"'Your girl'?" Ryan actually laughed at Tan, not hearing you over the deafening music, but the two men were clear as day to one another. "Got it fucked up, playboy, if you're tryna tell me what's what about what's mine."
"Yeah?" Tan nodded, grinning slowly. "Think she's yours?"
"She ain't nobody else's - "
"That why she was coming to me this whole time?" Tan taunted. "'Cause you couldn't make her nut, couldn't fuck her right. What a fucking shame, then she had to come to me 'cause I don't disappoint her. She likes the way I fuck 'cause it's the only time I get rough with her, not like you - "
The gathered crowd gasped when Ryan swung first - everyone saw it. The punch never landed, Tangerine keeping you behind him as he adjusted to upper cut Ryan. It spurred an entire altercation; your girlfriends quickly scurrying out of the way as Ryan and "his boys" tried to take on Tangerine, Lemon, and their entourage. The smoldering cigarette was dropped. Security had to step in, blood making the linoleum floors slicker than spilt alcohol made it sticky, both parties being escorted out of different exits of the venue.
You were faced with a decision.
"Y/N! C'mon!" The birthday girl called, holding up her bloodied boyfriend. Ryan paused and glared at you, face fucked, nose broke, eye darkening, jaw swollen, blood smeared; waiting for your decision. You shook your head and let the drunken crowd swallow your form.
Unsure how, you were let into the VIP section to grab Tangerine and Lemon's belongings, quickly jogging in your glittering heels towards the back exit.
"Should've fuckin' killed him - did you fuckin' hear him!? You saw him, what he did!?" Tangerine was raging, pacing the alley as his group watched on; unsure what to say or do to calm him down. "He fucking grabbed her, too, should go find him - put his fucking face in the Goddamn pavement - "
"Hey."
Tangerine froze when your voice was heard, meekly standing there with suit jackets in arm.
"Baby girl!" Lemon barked, laughing happily and opening his arms. "Oh! There she is! C'mere!" He happily growled, hugging you tightly. The others picked up on the hint, excusing themselves to find the cars while Lemon greeted you and Tangerine almost shit a brick.
"Oh, uh," you breathed when Lem pulled away, "I grabbed your jacket, sweetie."
"Thanks, love, can always count on yah," he beamed, accepting the apparel. He glanced over his shoulder and nodded, "I, uh, I'll go help find the car. We'll be at the end of the alley, yeah?"
"Yeah," you agreed, nodding; squeezing his arm softly before letting him pass. Almost sheepishly, you approached Tangerine, lips rolled between your teeth, noting the split lip and disheveled curls. His hands were on his hips, pacing a small circle, head tilted and unable to meet your gaze. "You, uh, got a li'l something," you gestured at your mouth.
His head lifted, seeing the small teasing glint to your eyes; making him smirk and joke back, "Yeah, just a bit, huh?"
"And you left this," you held out his suit jacket.
When he took it back, Tangie nodded and rushed, "Come home, doll."
"Aaron - "
"Nah, nah, c'mon, come home, baby, please. I know I've been the worst, I know you didn't deserve it - but after losing you... Actually losing you... I mean, when you didn't show up, like you said - I felt everything at once and I knew that I'd never be the man who deserved you, but I owed it to us to try. So... I made the decision to love you better."
"That's nice to hear, but - "
"But without action, it don't mean shit, I know," he finished for you, stepping closer to caress your cheek. "If you let me, baby, I swear, I'll love you better."
You couldn't verbally answer, just sigh and lean forward to rest your forehead on his chest for just a moment of peace. "Thank you," you mumbled, "for earlier, when Ryan got aggressive."
His arms came around in a vice, keeping you close and enveloped in his warmth. Tangerine promised, "Never gotta thank me, baby. Never." A horn blared from the mouth of the alley, knowing it was Aaron's people and you needed to make a decision. Right here. Right now. Yet, your ex just sighed and pulled away, offering, "We can drop you home, if you like. Or I'll get'cha a hotel, can crash with Brian - "
"Can I stay with you?"
Tangerine gulped, appearing shocked but agreeing, "Of course, baby, yeah, yeah, 'course, c'mon, let's go, this way, watch your step, love."
He quickly dropped his arms only to pull his jacket over your shoulders; keeping you at his side as he lead you to the idling car. Unknown to you, Ryan was at his own car, watching, waiting; seeing you leave with Aaron made his blood boil - but when his eyes connected with Aaron's over the roof of his car, seeing him grin, Ryan swore he could've gone postal.
"Are you guys alright?" You checked, Tan keeping you so close, you were practically on his lap. Brian was driving and two other guys sat passenger, all giving varying assurances that they were okay.
"Them frat fucks couldn't hit for shit, love, swear," Brian chuckled from the front seat. "Don't nobody fuck with our girl, yeah?"
"'Our girl'?" You repeated in amusement.
"You's Tangie's girl, yeah?" The guy next to you, codename Fuji, softly explained, "Makes you's untouchable, it does, yeah?"
You just chuckled slightly, readjusting so your arm around Tan's neck tightened; his own around your hips doing the same, silently snuggling closer. The car ride was entertaining to say the least, the lads filling the space with meaningless but very loud conversation about everything and nothing. To your relief, Lemon pulled up to Tan's building first; you two piling out of the car to the sounds of three randy lads cheering.
"C'mere," Tan huffed, one arm wrapping around your waist as the other offered the tinted car The Bird. He lead you towards the building, nodding to the doorman in greeting, "Big man."
This doorman had manned your building since years before you ever moved in; grinning at the sight of you, "Well, well, well... You two look real smitten, you do. There some reason? Aye?"
"Oh, I don't wanna hear it!" You whined jokingly, Tangerine laughing in triumph.
"Got my girl back," Tan clapped his hand into the doorman's, "huh? Told you."
"Aye-heeeyyyy! Welcome home, Missus!"
"Tuh," you barked with a fake laugh, sending Tangerine a sharp look over your shoulder. "Thank you, Thomas," you squeezed the man's arm as you passed.
"Ma'am," he tipped his hat, letting Tan go after you, before securing the door shut.
"Hear that?" You shot at Tan, the lobby attendant sitting up in attention behind the welcome desk. "Even Tom - "
"Don't start before we even get in the door," he chuckled, sighing, nodding to the pimply teen nephew of the building's owner before approaching the elevator bay.
"Don't be a dick - "
"I'm not trying to be, love, I just - I want us to get inside before we do. Yeah?" He frowned, petting hair from your forehead as the elevator dinged upon arrival. "I want us to talk 'bout it, alluvit, doll, but let us get home first."
You sighed and agreed, the machinery traveling up to your flat's floor; which required a key to access. There were only four flats on this floor - all having two stories - and when the elevator dinged to announce your arrival, one of the doors flew open.
You gasped, hand slapping to your mouth to hold in the shrill laughter that rammed into your lips in a desperate attempt to escape. Your eyes widened. You stopped short in your place when Ms. Roberts sauntered into her doorway, leaning on the frame in brand new, expensive, racy lingerie. Her greying hair was curled in stiff ringlets, her make-up heavy and obvious, smelling like she had bathed in perfume by the way it choked you in the hallway.
"Oh, hello, there. About time you got home - OH!" She purred in a low, sexy rumble before jumping in fright when she caught sight of you under Tangie's protective arm. With a squeal, she ducked back into her home and slammed the door; leaving you and Tan froze in place.
"Oh... My... God."
"Get inside, let's go, c'mon, inside, inside, inside, I won't survive if she comes back," Aaron laughed, ushering you to the door.
"I don't think she would, either," you couldn't help but giggle; entering over the threshold after Tan unlocked the door.
The lighter energy surrounding you two evaporated as you took note that Tangerine hadn't changed anything in the year (and change) you've been separated, a haunting comfort to see now. There was the familiar ghost of who you once were, but all of that was forgotten when Tan's hand slid around your waist from behind.
"All right, love?" He asked in your ear, mouthing at the shell in the way that made your head fall to the side.
"Just a lot of memories here," you whispered, holding his arms to your waist.
Tangerine licked at your exposed neck. "We'll make more," he promised.
"I'm sorry I missed so many."
He paused, sighing; forcing you to shiver from the shock of air over your wet skin. Tan straightened up but kept you in his arms, assuring, "It's my fault. But, uh..." Your head turned to look, watching Tan pull his wallet out and sigh sheepishly, open it, then pluck a gorgeous diamond ring from the bill slot.
"What the hell is that...?"
"When I found it, I first kept it in the box, always on me. Just in case, you know, the moment was right - that you'd believe me when I ask you to marry me. But the box kinda," he shrugged, "fell apart from me openin' it, movin' it around."
"So you put a," you squinted, holding his wrist to look at the ring pinched in his fingers, "3 karat diamond ring in your wallet?"
"3 and a half..."
"Aaron," you sighed, turning to face him fully; unable to tear your gaze away from the ring. "I don't want this ring if - "
"No, no 'ifs'," he rushed, "I swear, it's what I want - it's what I've always wanted and just couldn't admit. After tonight, I don't think I can keep this ring - it needs on your finger and that bastard needs put in the ground - "
"Can you not ruin this proposal by threatening to murder my ex?" You laughed, watching his split lips spread into a grin.
"This a proposal?"
"If you word it right, could be."
"Lemme get on my knee - "
"No," you stopped him, nodding, whispering, "just ask me."
Aaron blinked once in confusion, then simply asked, "Will you marry me?"
You levitated into his arms; arms coiling around his neck; lips to his; sucking air from his lungs into yours, mumbling, "Yes, yes, yes," repeatedly. In surprise, Aaron stumbled back a few steps but caught himself, chuckling, fully hoisting you into his embrace.
"Right answer," he teased, carrying you through the apartment and to the nearest piece of furniture - the couch. Dropping down with you straddling his lap, he chuckled, "Here, put it on, yeah? Keep it safe." You grinned and accepted the ring, letting him slide it on, but unable to admire it in full as it became a free-for-all frenzy; tearing clothes from the other, lips suckling, teeth clashing, spit smearing. Breaking apart for a moment, Tangerine growled, "I don't know if I love or hate tonight, huh? Seein' you with him, sayin' you'll marry me, comin' home - "
"Ace, Tangie? Baby?" You smirked, holding his cheeks to keep his face in front of yours, "Tonight's good - it's a good night. Yeah?"
He nodded, "Yeah."
"It's a good night - say it."
"A good night - great night."
"Great fuckin' night," you agreed, "now, I need you to fuck me before I spontaneously combust - "
Aaron's mouth was on yours before the words were fully formed. You gasped, holding on tightly, encouraging his tongue to tangle with yours as the night's emotions overtook you both in a searing heat of passion. His hands planted on your hips and began guiding your movements in slow, languid strokes over his growing bulge you were seated on.
With a small growl, Tangerine pulled back only to flip you over; laying your back to the cushions so he could hover over you, his hips grinding between your spread legs. "Mine," he grit, licking into your mouth as he pushed his cock directly into your moistening center, "all mine. Hear me? All fucking mine - you won't ever be with another man. Yeah?"
You weakly whimpered, nodding; his teeth catching your bottom lip and pulling. Your breast was palmed by a hot and heavy hand; gasping when Tangie pinched your nipple through the fabric of your dress.
"Nah, nah, nah," Tan grumbled, "wanna hear you say it, baby. Need to hear it."
Boldly, you reached out to rub the heel of your palm into his leaking member, managing to speak against his lips, "I'm all yours, Aaron. Never anyone else's."
"Yeah?" He grit.
"Yeah," you nodded, giving a flex of your hand that made his shoulders stiffen, "and no other man will know me - nor will I know another man. It's you and me."
"About fuckin' time; ain't never lettin' you go again, baby," he breathed, taking both wrists in his to pin over your head. "Now... Let me make up for this past year."
Ms. Roberts wore noise canceling headphones the entire night and began researching new apartment buildings available for move-in ASAP.
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Dawn broke, filling the room with a warm, bright light that accentuated the smoke wafting from Aaron's mouth. Neither of you got any sleep; exhausted in the best way possible, laid in bed, your head on his shoulder with arms bent to mindlessly twiddle together in the air.
"Remember that first retreat your company sent employees on?" Aaron asked softly, his other hand flicking his cigarette ash into a nearby ashtray.
"Hm... The one to Cancún?"
"Yeah."
"The one I missed 'cause we had a 48-hour romp?"
Tangerine laughed slightly, "That's the one."
"What about it?"
"Just... Laying here made me think of it. How fucked-out you were, how you missed your damn plane."
"You made me miss it!"
"That sounds accusatory."
You grinned when he lowered the cigarette to your lips, letting you puff it before pulling away. On exhale, you reminded, "You're the one who couldn't cut me a damn break."
"Since when do you want me to go easy on this pussy? Huh?"
With a snicker, you mused, "When you're whiskey-drunk and I'm drinking champagne?"
Tangie paused, then nodded, "Yeah, all right, that's fair. Whiskey dick ain't a joke, love."
You hummed and turned on your side into him, hiking your leg over his hips; snuggling into his warmth, new angle allowing you to gaze up at him. His arm laid around you in a secure hold, the other lazily smoking. You added, "Neither is being champagne drunk, makes me queazy."
"Probably not the best combination for fucking, huh?"
"I don't recommend it."
Aaron was quiet a moment, inhaling toxic smoke with a hiss through his teeth, "Bet they got champagne on them planes to Cancún."
"Bet they got champagne for other destinations, too," you teased. "Besides, why do you care? You're banned from popping bottles."
"Huh? Since when - why?"
"Since you sprayed me with a bottle that cost more than $3,000 USD!"
"If I can't spray my girl in luxury, what the fuck is this all for?" He smirked, looking down at you fondly.
"That bottle was meant to shmooze the German Ambassador!"
"Well, someone should've put a label on it!" You laughed his name, feeling his arm tighten. He tacked on, "Y'know, I gotta admit, just doesn't feel real yet."
"Hmm?"
"You... Back in my arms, in our bed - our home," he gave a great big deep sigh.
"It'll get real when people know we're back together."
"Is it wrong I want it to just be us for a bit? Private, intimate, just being together without everyone's outside influence or opinion?"
You smiled softly, "No, it's not wrong... I'd be lying if I said I didn't want the same."
"Then how about we catch a flight outta here?"
"Excuse me?"
"Yeah, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon," he beamed, suddenly struck with renewed vigor; positively radiating with excitement. You pulled off his chest in time for him to sit up, insisting, "Let's do it all again, baby. Let's catch a flight, change the weather to celebrate us promising forever."
"Tangie, baby, what're you talking about? We can't just up and leave - "
"Why not?"
"We have jobs! Or at least, I have a job with a consistent schedule."
"Oh, c'mon, doll, don't think too hard - let's go, let's catch a flight somewhere warm and sunny."
"You're not gonna let this go, are you?"
Tangerine shrugged, "Not likely. Can think of it as some engagement celebration - but just between us. I mean, it's never gonna be 'just us' again, you know?"
With a sigh, you agreed, "All right... Let's go."
"All right?"
"Yeah, all right, fine."
"Yeah? All right? Fine?"
"Oh, fuck about - don't parrot me, Aaron!"
He chuckled with a grin so wide, you wondered how it didn't split his face in two. Your fiancé playfully dropped onto your front; jostling the bed, arms planted on either side of you to keep his weight balancd while dotting rapid kisses around your face.
When satisfied, he pulled back and all but bounced out of bed while encouraging, "Let's go, c'mon!"
"Baby, wait - "
"You grab the passports, I'll pack for us!"
You paused to watch him rush into the walk-in closet, laughing and muttering as you climbed out of bed, "I'm gonna be in questionable clothing this whole vacation, aren't I?" There was a fond smile on your face.
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requesting rules and masterlist
Bullet Train masterlist
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tarot-by-e11e · 5 days ago
Text
PAC: "Little Warnings"
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Unfortunately, this is gonna hurt. So, don't read through this if you're already going through some pretty harsh stuff.
When I felt called to do this PAC, I felt that we needed to be humbled and check ourselves occasionally to see if we were being a bit too arrogant. It's such an odd feeling to be called to do this theme for this specific PAC, but hey, even if not every loving call out may be meant for others, every message is still, in some shape or form, valid. Not all of it may resonate with you, and that is still okay~
But I am manifesting that you will encounter this when the universe deems you need to be lovingly knocked down a few pegs~
Nothing wrong with a little loving call-out?
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Pile 1:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Wands, Hierophant, 5 of Coins
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Hi Pile 1, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
"Aren't you getting a bit over your head lately? Nothing wrong about being confident in your own abilities but you don't need to rub it in other people's faces that you know you're that Queen B~"
"There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, my dear. If you don't want to be perceived as someone abrasive or cheap, you know what you need to do."
"Traditions are great and all but there's always room to make new traditions. Honoring the past doesn't mean you have to continue living in the past."
"Which would you prefer being ruthlessly right all the time and be hated? Or learn how to communicate compassionately without sacrificing your truth?"
"Don't expect different results when you're clearly stuck in your ways."
"No matter how much you mean well, if you don't know how to respectfully convey your messages properly, you will not be understood in a way that you'd prefer."
"Don't expect other people to pick up on your body language and subtle hints. Not everyone is as painfully self aware as you."
"Your Past pain is valid but your attitude is not."
"You keep behaving like you can't get passed your trauma from your past then btch out on how cruel life was for you, so you project your hurt towards others, especially towards people who are living the life that you want. Seriously, pick a struggle and push through it. Make it make sense."
"You are not bound to the environment you grew up in, because you have the power to change your destiny. Remember, at the end of the day, only you can save yourself from your circumstance."
"You are more capable than you let yourself believe you are. You just chose to live in your pain when you know you have to put in the effort for you to change your life for the better."
"You are bound by your own self imposed limitations. You are imprisoned in your mind by your own fear."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 2:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Swords, Chariot, Strength
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Hi Pile 2, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "I'm all up for honesty, just not verbal abuse. So be discerning if the receiver of the message is too soft hearted or easily traumatised."
- "Words are double edged swords. The same words that can heal can also break someone's heart."
- "Discern which battles are worth fighting for. Know when to retreat your words when you know that how you speak may bring more harm than good."
- "Being assertive and a goal getter is nice and all, but remember, your passion may be misinterpreted as abrasive and uncouth. Remember to respect other's personal boundaries."
- "Going after what you want is normal, disregarding someone's feelings and free will isn't."
- "Think before you speak or do."
- "Your way isn't the only way."
- "Impulsive behaviour leaves you susceptible to disaster and unnecessary quarrel. It won't kill you to think before you leap."
- "You don't need to so harsh and dominant to be perceived as strong."
- "Having strength does not warrant you to be mannerless and disrespectful."
- "Hypervigilance doesn't mean you're strong. It means you've been pushed to the corner where you had no one to rely on, especially during the times you need anyone the most."
- "Being able to do everything on your own doesn't mean you don't need help. You can lean on to others unharmed too. Not everyone is out to get you."
- "Just because you used to being in pain and on your own, it doesn't mean that what you've gone through is something you deserve. Don't catastrophize every bad thing that's happened to you as a punishment from the universe. Unfortunately, bad things happen for no reason. You were just unfortunately at the wrong place in the wrong time."
- "You don't deserve to be stuck in your hyperindepence and wear your lack of trust in others like a badge of honor. Your body can only hold so much trauma before it starts completely wrecking your nervous system and have it physically manifest as an illness. Ex. You struggle to lose weight no matter how much you work out because your body doesn't feel safe to exist. That's why you body stores fat as a cushion to help make it feel safe to exist."
- "How far will you keep pushing the people you love away? Are you waiting for their patience to run out so that you can subconsciously prove to yourself that everyone would leave you?? You're so hellbent in your skewed narrative that feeds your self-sabotaging tendencies and lack of self worth that you'd do anything to have your negative self talk to manifest into your reality. Stop feeding yourself the BS that (If they're meant for me, they'll stay. News Flash, no one wants to willing stay with someone who refuse to grow out of their own toxicity. No one can save you but yourself. EVEN YOUR LOVED ONES HAS LIMITS TOO."
- "Be a dear and search up the meaning of the ff. words: GASLIGHTING, STONE WALLING, COVERT NARCISSIST, ACCOUNTABILITY, EMOTIONAL MATURITY, JEALOUSY, SOFT FBOI/GURL, SHADOW WORK, MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMING (Feel free to see which words hurts the most for you and start working on that)"
- "No one can save you from your own self imposed mental prison of scarcity and unworthiness. People around you can only do so much for you. The power to trap you and free you has always been in your hands."
- "Are you done thinking that everyone is out to get you? Hopefully you'd come to realise that people don't think about you as much as you think they do. Everyone's busy barely surviving their lives to be bothered to meddle with yours."
- "You're not as strong as much as a target you think you are, and that's okay. You don't have to be in everyone's mind and in everyone's DM to feel important. You are worthy and deserving of all regardless if you are in the spotlight or behind the scenes."
- "Two things can be true at the same time. You are the Main Character of your life and also be a background character is someone else's storyline."
- "What's serious for you may not be serious for someone else. So don't expect others to adjust for you when you made zero efforts to properly communicate what you wanted to say."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 3:
Cards Pulled:
7 of Swords, Ace of Swords, 6 of Wands
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Hi Pile 3, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Just because someone broke your heart it doesn't give you the right to leave a trail of broken hearts in your path. Your pain is valid but your attitude and actions afterwards aren't."
- "Being betrayed in the past doesn't mean you should play and to toy with someone else's feelings. You are becoming the player that you hated the game for."
- "Not all people mean to use and abuse you. Other people are just good natured and mean what they say. Don't confuse someone's genuity because someone else broke your trust before."
- "Discernment is highly encouraged, projecting your pain and jealousy isn't."
- "It's great to chase new ideas, what's not great is to chase the idea of someone new then cheat on your current partner just because things got bored. Don't be a part of the problem."
- "Don't even dare entertain anyone new just because you chose to be lazy and not put in the effort to communicate on how your current relationship can get better. Emotionally opening up to someone is cheating. Having a work husband/wife is still cheating. Putting yourself in any situation that would cause your partner to doubt your loyalty is a breeding ground of disaster of the life you currently know."
- "If you caved in and cheat now, you are bound to cheat again. If you allow yourself to be tempted now, you have proven yourself unworthy to even be in a loving relationship. In short: you have become part of the problem. So don't expect receiving anything you refused to give. You have no right to the privileges of an exclusive and healthy relationship if you fck around and find out. (because you actively chose to play whack a mole and find out what it's like to have std because of your recklessness)."
Channeled Song:
- "How far will you go just to win? Will you cheat on your partner just to have a promotion? Will you pay someone to ruin your competition just to win? Will you start a smear campaign just to go ahead? Will you drop little white lies to make yourself appear as the better option? How illegal and immoral would you allow yourself to become just to get ahead? Is it worth it? Lose your friends and family along the way? Just to win that empty cup?"
- "Will you abandon your morals just to win?"
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Pile 4:
Cards Pulled:
6 of Swords, Knight of Cups, 7 of Wands
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Hi Pile 4, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Unfortunately, leaving the problem behind without any explanation or letter won't make it go away."
- "Ghosting, just to protect your ego, is never the answer. Face your issues like an adult and accept the consequences of your actions accordingly."
- "No amount of dr*gs, alcohol, smoke or flings can help you tun away from your own willful ignorance. You can't run away from your own feelings. The only way to get away/rid of your problem is by facing it. This is one of the moments in a person's life where DELULU is NOT the SOLULU."
- "Fleeing the country won't keep you from feeling your feelings."
- "Just because you understand how people work and emotionally operate, it doesn't mean that you should use that to your unfair advantage. Stop binge watching those dark psychology videos. And you wonder why people pick a bad vibe from you? What do you expect? You are indeed the problem: the not so covert manipulative problem."
- "Stop using the promise of helping others with their dreams just so you can trick them in making your dreams come true at their expense."
- "You can only spin a web of lies so far."
- "You're not as convincing of a gaslighter as you think you are. People can see through your lies, they just chose not to speak up because, yes, they do it out of pity."
- "Resilience is incredibly admired but bulldozing other people out of your way to get the results is out of the question."
- "Not seeing the results that you want then btching about not having slept enough and feeling like you're about to collapse? You chose to overwork and overburden yourself to the point of burn out, and you're shocked that your health and sanity is fcked up? Dear, make it make sense."
- "Has it ever occurred to you that just because you put in the effort to win someone over, it doesn't mean that they're obligated to choose you? Free will and preferences are a thing, you know? You can be everything and more to that person, and that person is not required nor obligated to choose you. You can the most ideal man/woman and still not be chosen."
- "Don't expect exclusivity from someone who told you from the beginning that they're there to fck around. You can't change someone just because you stayed. You can only keep someone that wants to be kept by you."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
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Feel free to check out my feedback herePaid Readings are AVAILABLE
In all honesty, I feel so bad for releasing this PAC but there's this oddly strong gut feeling that we all need to be humbled and wake up to the toxicity we all chose to lie with at night.
In fact, some things we've gone through, unfortunately are the results of our own lack of accountability.
Sorry if I hurt your feelings, but some painful warnings need to be said.
Notice:
Exchange Readings are OPEN
Feel free to send me some support in the form of tips,
Head to my Buy-Me-A-Coffee here 🍀
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codnriddlewhore · 1 month ago
Text
A/N: guys idk how to make thos links someone teach me plsssss and i hope u like this, i decided to post 2 shorter parts instead of 1 long one, felt nicer. next part is gonna be set some years later and itll be maaaybe a tad bit happier. dont hesitate to say anything, good or bad, mwah
wc: 965
She left earlier, of course.
The day after, to be precise. It was a slow and quiet morning. She felt at peace and torn apart at the same time. Can you feel that way? Maybe like someone that felt content with the way they lived their life, though now being stuck in a tornado.
Tom´s wife was sitting on the breakfast table with one leg propped up on the chair, wearing one of his jumpers and a teacup in her hand, smiling to herself and only having kissed him good morning and asked if he wanted tea. It angered him. Of course it did, she was always and every day the biggest chatterbox in the morning, excited about the day. He sometimes joked that it annoyed him. He hoped she realized the joke. He lived off her feeding him her presence. And who smiles like that, does he have a stain on his tie? Did she pack him heart shaped-sandwiches? I mean what else could´ve-
“Why aren´t you getting dressed? We`ve got to leave in-“
He checks his watch.
“exactly 13 minutes. I love you, but I know you wouldn´t make it.
She looks up from her tea, smiling again. He could sense it wasn´t the adorable type, it made his stomach turn. Something was wrong.
Well of course something was wrong Riddle, you´re ignoring the fact that you weren´t able to breath after the argument last night and that, you incontrollable child threw up all over the fucking bathroom you-
“Oh Minerva took the 2nd years to Hogsmeade for the morning, got 3 free periods.”
Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. You never lie to me, you´ve never lied to me- What did I do, please, I´m begging you to go back day before yesterday with me I can´t fucking stand this
Of course he knew what he did, though did it deserve such a reaction? From both of them?
She stands up, gets very close to him and musters a real smile, one that made her eyes really small and showed her gums. It took all of her willpower left to do so. For him, It made his before mentioned train of thought stop.
Okay, of course it´s still her. It´s his wife.
She straightens his wobbly tie, there was no need to do so on other mornings. Another look in his eyes, knowing she´s the probably the only person that will see the truth in them. The fear. The other wobbly thing in the room were his legs when she kissed him, deeply, not hungry, but lovingly and meaningfully.
“Be nice. They´ll love you”
“Pfft, absolutely, don´t they always?”, he didn´t want to make a joke in such a moment but I guess he felt human, wanting to lift the atmosphere.
In the years after, they´d both remember this moment countless of times, she grinning like a child that remembered their last cool birthday party and he as in the objectively worst choice of words he ever made.
It was time, she felt it in the air. She'd die otherwise. Her to-do-list was now fairly simple, though the circumstances added some points.
pack Cry Put music on to distract Sob Pack Unpack Sob Look forward to life Pack Leave her faveorite blanket. He secretly thinks it´s fluffy. He gets cold easily. cry Cry happy tears because how fortunate is she to have spent 3 years with such a magnificent person. Pack Write note Cry but just a tad Breathe. Make tea. Put a lid on his cup so it stays hot. Breathe Smile Leave
Tom came home early. Who fucking cares about the pre-OWLs, he knows there´s the quidditch finale tonight and no one will concentrate. 1st day after Christmas break, whose idea was that.
Was she still in the school? He didn´t see her, though he didn´t particularly go look for her, he knows when to back off. She sometimes “regenerated” in her own space.
He got comfortable in his house and went into the ki- Did he forget his tea this morning? Seems unusual.
a note.
No.
In a pace an Olympic fast-walker would be jealous of, he makes his way to the library and sits down in the old, brown leather chair. His eyeballs hurt from his palms pressing into them, a strategy from the orphanage when he was first mocked for crying, it prevented the tears wonderfully. Tom sat like that for a few minutes, his left leg bouncing up and down and increasing in speed.
No.
Abruptly Tom stands up and walks over to the bookshelf with her little detective novels and big encyclopedias on algae and what not. His shaking hand pulls one out, the title doesn´t matter. He stares at it. He smells it. It doesn´t smell like her, at all. Why would it? It´s just a book. Was she real?
From his mouth comes not a growl, not a scream, what is it? He simply knows he hasn´t made that noise in a very long time and it almost accurately described his emotions. Almost. Nothing ever really will, he believes, though he´ll find a word for word description of his thoughts many years later. The book is now in about 14 pieces, torn apart, unreadable. Something wet runs over his hot cheeks. The knee-part of his grey slacks is ruined by the wet grass. He thought he´d suffocate inside.
Dearest Tommy,
I think I said everything I meant last night, though my devotion to you is hard to word.
You are the most precious, wonderful thing that has happened to me.
I want you to accept yourself.
To see yourself as I do.
You´re too much of a gift to existence and love in general to reduce yourself to a cause.
I love you, my Darling.
There were a few more words in between, but the tear stains made them unreadable. He´d get to reading it at some point. Maybe.
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ancientgoddessofegypt · 9 months ago
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ASTROLOGY OBSERVATIONS PT. 13 DIVINE FEMININE - ART OF TRANSFORMATION
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So I want to get into the signs, houses, and aspects that express a form of transformation that isn't recognized thru them majority of the time. Scorpio placements will be one of the energies I get into, however it isn't the only one that has this gift down pack.
All placements have different forms of healing & transformation. I'm just highlighting the observations I've been getting from each sign listed thus far.
Aries Rising/Virgo Placements - > These two energies have an ability to let go of their environments, circumstances and going deep into the mind to let things happen. What I mean is, both these placements are strictly head first in a lot of what they do and this can be a pretty tricky battle. The way they transform is through the heart, and the body and the mind follows suit after. At some point in their reality, they will have to let the mind go, in order to form the life they wish to live for themselves more openly.
For aries however, this isn't typically their issue. Their issue lies in always moving with their head, and not being strategic like their Virgo pals. Moves made first without thinking doesn't teach them anything and once they learn to allow the mind to form a new way of doing things this is where they challenge themselves and create a new persona.
Scorpio Placements deal with transformation a lot differently. It is an everyday cycle, not something they can shut up. Unlike their friends the virgos and aries, they can shut this down through their minds and can easily suppress things quicker. Scorpios, unfortunately cannot get the same. Because they feel everything. And I mean everything. And internally, they know whats the spiritual reason as to why they are the way they are so their pain/trauma is justified. The art of transformation for these cats is to look into that mirror into the void and explore the rage, warmth, the things that matter and the things that don't and letting it shape them. They have the wounds to impact others with healing methods if they just listen to themselves. The way they transform is through the psyche, the unconscious realms. Their doing shadow work without all the journaling or magic. It just comes to them.
Pisces/Neptune Placements are constantly shapeshifting. Their form of transforming is strictly from the ethereal realm, and it finds its way through physical activity or thru the imagination. Their world is constantly shifting and changing and in most cases you can find it through their clothing style, the way they express themselves and even thru their perspective. All 3 of the things I mention in conjunction all align together when something mentally changes them, since they are ruled by the subconscious/unconscious part of their brain more then their peers.
Moon/Cancer placements have a dark side that at some point of their life they shift into. Most never see this to be a real thing until well... something or someone changes them to that direction. This transformation is almost inevitable. They have to learn the darkside of their emotions or else it'll literally hurt them in the end. They must go down the dark depths of their soul to conquer the hidden array of demons that they kept under their beds so long ago. Skeletons in their closet is an understatement, its not the type that we are normally use to seeing from this group. You wouldn't believe their like that.
On the brighter side, this shows that these people are multidimensional and not just the sweet loving nurturing breed of individuals they normally keep you accustomed to. When they get to this phase, they aren't for the weak. So get use to it when the get their because they'll balance out both personalities for the better.
Libra Placements - Have a mental transformation they embark in throughout their life. Their perspectives change them in a way that forms a fair yet equal link to other humans as they're prone to be more selfish in the beginning. The heart is also where they transform, and it is through love they really can make a difference. Everything is prone to mental physics first, then the heart leads the way. Their not use to showing all their skin, but usually when they do its because something or someone made them bare their heart, for better or for worse. If it gets worse, than they'll start being the ones to play you for your heart. If best, they'll learn to share that love in all ways as their charm lights up even more. For individuals who are normally private, their vulnerabilities is what sheds away the old demons and become aware of their souls embarking on ways compassion could heal them and others around them.
Virgos have to live a little, that's simple. Normally the picture perfect group, they have to focus on the heart and the body and NOT what the mind is telling them. They can't live in those rose colored glasses they made themselves. They gotta let things around them be as it may, and they can join the circus if they like. Being more open to things outside of their comfort zone challenges their old self, while creating a new one. Something shifts inside of their body before that transformation really starts to hit. Their the rulers of the maiden-mother-crone phase. Psychological something changes them during certain points in their life weakening they old self and making new beginnings form with experience. They are connected to the kundalini and the serpent mind. More to come on this seperately.
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galaxy-fleur · 3 months ago
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Replaying RE4R, and I am once again thinking of how Leon just straight up murders a guy the moment he attacks. Like yeah, sure, he lunged at him with a weapon, there is a bloody badge of an officer, things are sketchy to say the least, but still. It all happens so fast, I doubt he actually had the time to fully put two and two together quite yet.
And you can't tell me that Leon, a trained agent, just overestimated the power of his kick on accident. That ↓
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Was a pretty much deliberate kick. What's interesting is that in the OG RE4, he at least tells the ganado to freeze a good couple of times (or maybe once, I don't remember the specifics, but my point still stands) before actually proceeding to harm him. Remake Leon, meanwhile... just breaks his neck without a second thought.
And his reaction right after makes it... pretty obvious, honestly.
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There is no strong reaction there to offing an old man in his home. Now, granted, he hears a scream right after, so it's not like he has much time to stand and ponder over what happened! But the only thing he says right after is: 'This is not good.' And, yeah, true, but we do know Leon is capable of expressing some level of distress over something he finds disturbing, and he proceeds to do that literally a few minutes later once you start exploring the village. So really, it's an interesting scene and a very intriguing way of introducing this hardened version of Leon we'll be playing as.
I wouldn't be thinking about this as much if not for the circumstances surrounding it. Not like Leon is aware that this man is infected with anything. Up until the moment he gets back up, he could be just some disturbed, paranoid old man or something. And he did just walk into someone's house. He's an intruder here, really. But the moment danger presents itself, he eliminates the threat without a second thought.
I think it speaks volumes of the past 6 years that passed for him, and how they shaped him. We don't know much of Leon's job: what it entails exactly, what kind of work he does on the daily, how the entire structure operates. And before the events of RE4, it's not like he was a well-known agent, if I remember correctly. It's his successful rescue of Ashley that got him high in the ranks. His status as a Racoon City survivor didn't do that. Throughout RE4R, we see him regain his humanity through the connections with other characters, going from the cold, robotic way he caries himself at the start of the game, to the determined, emotionally-invested man we later see carrying Ashley to Luis' laboratory.
It's very neat to think about! And while we all love Leon for his kind heart and his drive to save innocent lives, he is more than capable of violence, and that's an aspect of him I wish was talked about more. That neck break was definitely not the first one for him, just saying.
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shoezuki · 8 months ago
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Sampo likes to be vague about where they're going. It's kind of like a game to him, one that only he knows the rules to. Gepard asks, even though he knows it's nearly hopeless; where are we going? Is it a planet, a ship, a living creature? Which galaxy are we in? Is there oceans, deserts, forests? What kind of animals are there, what kind of people will they see?
Even when his questions go unanswered, Sampo's eyes gleam. Sometimes he shuts Gepard up with a kiss, a hand pressed over his heart, or teeth brushing over the column of his neck in a way that makes his breath stutter.
This time, though, Sampo is direct. For once, Gepard doesn't have to ask. Sampo wakes him up with instructions.
"Don't leave the ship," he instructs for the hundredth time as he guides the ship towards a strange, lone rock in the cosmos. The section of space they find themselves in is strange, a sweet, heavy feeling in the air. Their destination is in the midst of an asteroid field, metallic debris and chunks of meteors strewn and suspended about like someone strung them up randomly.
It's a bar, that much is evident. A sort of small, concrete building on a rough landform. It looks industrial, like someone had sliced a building out of a strip mall and deposited it here. There landform it's placed on is a small island, overrun with weathered docks made of scrap metal and decaying wood, anchored to nothing. various ships, dozens of them of all shapes and sizes, cling to the docks or are anchored to the landform itself, with ropes or chains or strange contraptions. For a desolate corner of the universe, it's packed. Yet Gepard doesn't see a single living person in sight.
"Gepard."
Sampo says his name with an uncharacteristic urgency that makes him jump, only then realizing Sampo had docked their ship as well and left them sitting in silence for however long. Sampo stands in front of Gepard now, hands on his hips and a rigid, towering figure. The starlight seeping in and the bright, flashing fluorescent lights on the bar glow from behind him, casting a shadow over his face. "Did you hear me?"
"Don't leave the ship," Gepard parrots, only half awake, with his legs crossed and a blanket draped over him. Sampo's jaw tightens. "Yes, but what else?" Gepard's sheepish silence is met with a low sigh, Sampo pinching the bridge of his nose. "Geppie, I'm being serious here, okay? This is important."
Gepard doesn't understand, but Sampo's tight posture, the pinched slant of his eyebrows, the way his stare feels intent, pointed on Gepard's skin, all makes secondhand unease curdle in his stomach. He bites his tongue and nods his head. Somehow that motion is enough to make Sampo sigh with clear relief, all but collapsing onto the rickety futon beside Gepard.
"Okay, take notes, Gepard. No-- not literally," Sampo adds on when Gepard pulls out his phone, making him blink and put it back down, attention fully on Sampo. "So, you will not leave the ship, under any circumstances. Got it? Never. You could watch the tavern collapse into itself and you still have to stay here. Don't leave and absolutely do not follow me into the tavern.
"But..." Sampo hisses between his teeth, as if pained to say more, "if for some idiotic, stupid reason that only the Aeons know of, you do go inside, there's rules you need to follow." He holds up one finger, intently watching him as if to make sure Gepard was actually paying attention. "First, don't tell anyone your name. Call yourself... the Captain, or something. No one can know your real name. Second, don't eat or drink anything. People will act all kind and hospitable or whatever and try and offer you drinks. Don't take any. Thirdly, do not dance with a single person. Don't dance at all, really. Just stay put somewhere and I'll... I'll find you, alright? Not that I’ll need to, since you won’t go in the Tavern, right? Okay? You got all that?"
Gepard frowns, chewing on his lip. This is the wrong answer, apparently; Sampo makes him jump by grabbing his shoulders, fingers tight where they dig into his arms. "Gepard, please. I'm being serious here. Do you understand?"
"Yes, of course," Gepard nods rapidly, repeating Sampo's rules in his head like a mantra. It's not the truth, though. Confusion prickles under his skin. "Why... are we even here? Wait, why are you going inside? Won't it be... dangerous for you too, then?"
Sampo's smile is sharp, a dangerous flash of pointed teeth. "I am technically a Masked Fool, y'know? And if we're gonna go through this neighbourhood of the universe, I need to, uh... partake in some revelry with the ladies and gentlemen in the Tavern. It'd be rude to walk through their house and not at least say hi!"
It's not the truth, or at least not the whole of it, but before Gepard can press anymore Sampo rubs his hand over his mouth, his words muffled into his palm. "And I gotta pay the owner of the tavern a visit, make sure he's upholding an old deal of ours."
Distaste, a sort of rancid discomfort makes Gepard stay quiet, simply watching Sampo as he gets up waltzes around the small bedroom on the ship. He hums something, talking to himself in cut off sentences like he often does as he gets his jacket, puts on his shoes. He feels different, though, a different kind of undercurrent below his skin. Sampo double and triple checks that his daggers are sheathed and hidden on him before turning to leave.
"Oooooookay! I'll be back!" He sings out, vanishing through the bedroom door and into the cockpit. He's leaning back into the door in less than a second, something in his eyes that makes Gepard sit straight. "Don't. Leave."
Sampo doesn't turn away until Gepard nods again, wiping around and vanishing like he'd never been there. Gepard hears the sound of the shuttle door opening with an airy hissss, slamming back shut.
He doesn't know how long he sits there, stewing in the silence Sampo left behind. The ship is quiet without Sampo's presence. His absence is always a sort of empty stillness, but now it feels suffocating. Gepard starts pacing, at some point.
Neon signs hang on the industrial cement walls of the bar, flashing images of two beer bottles colliding in cheers, an open sign that pulses blue and white. A massive, pink neon glowed the name 'The Green Chapel,' gaudy and far too bright. It makes his eyes hurt, but they still glow on the back of his eyelids when he tries to block them out.
Gepard doesn't see a single person, constantly walking around and up to the windshield, looking out at the other ships. Not a thing has moved, not another living soul has announced their presence. Gepard feels horrifically alone.
It's completely quiet. He can't hear any music, but there's a constant thump thump thump rattling in his bones, his heart, sending goosebumps rising on his skin. It reminds him of Serval's concerts, the times when he went to see Mechanical Fever perform; that sort of all consuming, booming sound of drums and bass that rattles the air.
He isn't sure how much time passes, but he knows it's far, far too long. It takes hours of worrying, of anxiety and unease making him feel nauseous, before Gepard realizes Sampo never said the tavern was safe for him, either.
It's deceptively easy, to leave the ship. Gepard makes sure he has his gauntlet on, properly dressed in jeans and a dark jacket. The air feels cold as he steps down onto the metal dock the ship is precariously perched on. Gepard doesn't hear a thing until he's standing at the old, weathered door, the fluorescent signs humming electric above him.
Gepard walks into the bar and is instantly engulfed by it, sound exploding around him. The music is electric, rhythmic harsh beats that crackle and surround him. It's massive inside, beyond what should be possible. The lights above pulse, the lights like living beings cutting through the darkness and bathing the crowd of writhing bodies in pink, purple, blues and reds. It's warm, a type of wet humidity in the air that smells of sweat and liquor and something strangely sharp-sweet that makes Gepard wrinkle his nose. He barely gets a chance to even recoil after stepping inside when a hand catches him, fingers on his elbow making him jolt away.
"Oh?" A woman, short in stature with long dark hair that glows blue-purple-pink under the throbbing lights. Her face is obscured by a mask, a pointed face with triangular ears. Gepard can almost make out swirling designs, the dark and light colours indistinguishable under the pulsing lights. He can't see her eyes, but there's a sharp tilt of her head that makes him feel small.
"You're new, aren't you?" She giggles, voice somehow cutting through the pounding music. "You are. I'd have recognized that handsome face if I'd seen it before." Gepard stands far taller than her, but somehow Gepard reels cornered, as if she's towering over him. She leans heavily into his side, a hand brushing over his clothed ribs. "Want to grab a drink? My treat, if you pay me back with a dance."
Gepard shoves her away without much thought. "No, I'd rather not," Gepard grinds out. She doesn't even flinch at his rejection, just stepping back. "I'm just looking for someone--"
"Aw, c'mon! No need to be such a bore. Just one dance won't kill you! Why not have some fun while you're here?"
Gepard bristles, overwhelmed and worried with Sampo's warnings swirling through his head. He narrows his eyes, goes to say something or push past her, but for a split second her mask shifts, the corners of its black eyes crinkling like paper. "Wait," she says, her voice burst of noise, "who are you looking for?"
Gepard catches himself before he can respond, clenching his teeth. Sampo had stressed he not say his own name, but what about Sampo's? He doesn't want to take the risk. "That... is none of your concern. Now, if you'll excuse me." He's uncaring as he shoves past her, gritting his teeth at the overwhelming lights and music, trying to stay out of the dancing crowd and keep towards the wall. He freezes when he feels too many fingers on his back.
“You're with him, aren’t you?” He doesn't know how he recognizes It to be her, her voice now distorted and muffled like she's underwater. Gepard spins on his heels and raises his fists on instinct, heart thumping in his chest--but she's gone. Gepard digs his teeth into his cheek and turns back, squaring his shoulders.
The dancefloor in the middle of the tavern is teeming with people, moving like one unified mass of laughter and cheering and screaming people. Gepard keeps to the wall, walking beside tables and booths filled with people all talking and taking shots, singing and laughing under the music. Many of them wear masks, indiscriminate things of varying sizes and shapes that Gepard can't decipher. Many of them don't wear masks, too, a cheerful gleam over their eyes. Gepard keeps catching glimpses of the bar through the crowd, against the far wall that's lined with shelves choke full of bottles. There's one bartender, technically; the person behind the bar is a humanoid figure in a clean blazer, their head gone with numerous grinning and crying and laughing masks spinning around over their shoulders. Their arms seem incorporeal, not quite real in a way that Gepard swears he sees two arms stretched across the bar collecting change, two more mixing a drink, one more talking with a customer like it's a hand puppet. It hurts his head to watch them move.
He has no idea how he's going to find Sampo in this. He should've asked more questions, especially what he's doing here. He tries to look for blue hair, green eyes, that smile he's come to know so well, but the hazy lights and constant movement makes everything blur together.
Gepard isn't looking where he's going, scanning the crowd and the filled tables and booths. His foot catches on the leg of someone's chair, nearly tripping him if it weren't for the hand that catches him by the shoulder. “Sorry,” Gepard gasps out, standing up. The man in the seat laughs, clapping a hand on his shoulder. His mask is more like a helmet, metal shaped into the face and crown of a king. 
“No problem, my man!” He laughs loudly, throwing an arm over Gepard's shoulders in a sort of side hug, as if they're old friends. “No harm no foul! What's your name, friend? Come to watch the show?”
“Call me Captain.” Gepard blurts out, looking past him. There's numerous tables and chairs before him, all facing the wall that is covered in dozens of TV screens of varying sizes. They all seem to be showing the same thing; a first person perspective of someone seemingly in battle, fighting a gargantuan reptilian beast. They seem to be losing, someone out of the corner of their eye screaming for them. Many people are watching the screens, cheering and clapping despite the grizzly scene of claws raking across the person's chest. Gepard sees some people groan, others celebrating as credits change hands. 
“It's just getting good,” the man pulls at Gepard's attention, motioning for him to sit down. Gepard holds against his tugging. “According to the script, the performer's love interest will watch them perish and go on a rampage to avenge them! Want me to order you a drink, too?” 
Gepard's shaking his head before the man's done talking, watching the way the mask's eyes gleam and blink like melting metal. “No,” he says, glad that the man's grip melts off him like ice as he steps back, “no thank you, I'm--”
He's stepped too far back, colliding with someone dancing. Gepard jumps and spins to see someone with the face of a snake and hair like pine needles hiss at him. His heart leaps in his throat as they vanish into the crowd, looking around to find himself engulfed by the dancers, surrounded. The music is too much, warm bodies pressing around him. He can feel his shirt sticking to his back, his heading hurting from the lights and--
A hand, rough and tight and insistent, clamps down on his forearm. Gepard growls and spins around, raising his gauntlet and punching whoever has grabbed him. His attack is halted midair, their hand encasing his fist. Gepard tries to kick, shove and pull away only to be yanked forward towards them.
Off balance, he falls into their grip, arms around his shoulders and his head shoved down into the crook of their neck. He goes to lash out, heart running rampant in his chest. He only stills, though, when he catches a glimpse of blue hair, feels annoying but familiar buckles digging into his own chest. The mouth by his ear, the chin hooked over his shoulder, makes him relax.
“Gepard!” Sampo's voice is a hissed sound, low and only for him. “What are you doing here?” His tone is harsh, his body tense against Gepard's. Sampo's hands are flurry of panicked motion as he runs them over Gepard's back, his arms, his shoulders, his head. “Are you okay? You aren’t hurt? Has anyone tried to-- Why are you here? Seriously, I wasn't joking when I said you needed to stay put! This place isn't safe. This stupid, sorry excuse for a Tavern--”
“I'm sorry,” Gepard interjects, grabbing one of Sampo's hands in his own, the other light on Sampo's waist. He rubs his thumb over the back of Sampo's hand. “I know, I know what you said. But you were gone… a long time. I was concerned and decided to look for you.” 
Sampo is quiet, simply standing pressed against Gepard. He feels the tension slowly leave his body, feels his shoulders drop as he lets out a sigh. He says nothing for a moment, intertwining his fingers with Gepard’s, his other hand on his shoulder as he starts to guide Gepard into a slow, swaying motion. He just goes along with it, let��s Sampo lead him into a slow dance that is wildly out of place with the music, the ecstatic crowd around them. Sampo is humming something soft and distantly familiar, his cheek pressed to Gepard’s.
The music is still constant, loud and vibrant, but Sampo’s presence makes it feel… diluted. Faraway and almost muffled, like there’s a bubble between them and the rest of the bar. Gepard glances around and notices it’s the same with the crowd, too; dozens of people around them, lost in their own worlds, now give them a wide berth, a few feet kept between the two of them and everyone else at all times. No one turns to look at them, Gepard doesn’t feel any eyes on him or note any quick glances towards them, as if looking at Sampo will burn their eyes.
“No need to apologize,” Sampo speaks up suddenly. Gepard turns to look at his face, but Sampo holds him chest to chest, keeping his chin over Gepard’s collar. His blue hair is vibrant in the light, his skin almost sparkling. “I shoulda just… brought you with me from the start, probably. Well I’d rather not bring you here at all but…” He sighs, clicks his tongue, leans into Gepard. “Duty calls! Or something like that.”
“Are you done here?” Gepard whispers. Sampo shouldn’t be able to hear him over the surging, vibrant air, but somehow Gepard knows he does. “With whatever it is you need to do here, I mean.” Sampo’s immediate response is a groaning sound deep in his throat, his forehead knocking against Gepard’s collarbone. “No, no. I still… ugh, this place sucks. Just give me a minute, please? And I’ll…”
“Okay.” Sampo leans into him so heavily and fully, like he’s trying to meld himself with Gepard’s flesh, into his skin. Gepard takes his weight without question, content to hold them both up as Sampo sways them in a slow turning waltz. Gepard’s head doesn’t hurt, anymore. The overstimulation has subsided, but the confusion and concern hasn’t, not fully.
“We’re dancing.”
“Mhm. Well, technically. Sampo Koski a better dancer than whatever this is, I assure you!”
“That’s not what I mean,” Gepard says with an amused snort, knocking his temple against Sampo’s head lightly. “I mean that… you said no dancing. With anyone.”
Sampo’s laugh rumbles Gepard’s chest, through his ribs and straight into his heart. “C’mon, Geppie! If you just don’t wanna dance, say so! I promise I’ll pretend it won’t break my weak, frail heart.”
“And you said no names. But you’ve said mine in here many times now.”
There’s a hesitation, one Gepard feels in Sampo’s stuttering step, his hand clenching so slightly around Gepard’s. “It’s… I’m just that exceptional, I suppose,” he says after a strained pause. 
Gepard wants to ask. It is a need, a rising feeling that rises from his stomach to his throat. He wants to ask about the people, the masks, the way Sampo’s touch and his presence makes people keep their distance but makes his head feel clear. Gepard has never, really, been curious like his sisters, but Sampo makes curiosity envelop him; Gepard wants to know everything about Sampo, the good and the bad. The things Sampo won’t tell him. But not here, in this strange Tavern with these strange people.
“I’m sorry,” Sampo whispers out, and Gepard feels like he’s apologizing for more than it seems, “but I need to… connect with some old Fools.” Sampo lifts his head and cranes his neck back, scanning over and past the crowd. Gepard tries to get a look at his face but Sampo turns his head each time, the lights and shadows obstructing his expression. All Gepard gets is shimmering, smooth skin like porcelain and a glimpse of green eyes glowing in an indescribable colour. 
“I can leave back to the ship,” Gepard says, “just… promise you won’t be long.” 
“Sorry, darling, but, uh…” He clicks his tongue, jerks his chin towards where Gepard came, where the door should be. But Gepard sees nothing but chairs and tables, a tall, harsh wall decorated with paintings and photos and screens that make his mind spin. “You’ll have to wait to leave with me, so I can show you the way out. But I’d rather you don’t meet the Tavernkeeper…” He chews on his lip, humming in thought as he searches for… something. 
“Aha!” Sampo suddenly jerks, jumping and yanking Gepard along with him. “Found him! C’mon, Geppie! You can hang out with my old friend while I, uh, go say my hellos.” 
The crowd parts seamlessly like water, heads turned away from them as Sampo pulls Gepard along. Gepard keeps his head down, focusing onto the point of contact where Sampo holds his hand tightly, his grip protective and unwavering. He doesn’t look back at Gepard once. 
A series of pool tables and poker tables envelop the corner, on a raised floor almost like a stage. Gepard glimpses poker chips, cards and credits and roulette wheels all in motion as Sampo guides him through it all to the far corner. A booth catches Gepard’s attention as they approach it, the seats filled with lifesized, off-white porcelain dolls, carved into various mechanical poses. Each has cards and chips in front of them, as if someone had set up a poker scene. The one, moving person sitting at the table makes his eyebrows raise. 
“Gio--” Gepard says, clamping his mouth shut before saying his full name. The man’s head snaps up, the familiar mask meeting Gepard’s gaze. The black, indestructible eyes of his mask are dark and depthless. He holds himself upright and proper, gloved fingers clasping his own hand of cards. He tilts his head towards Sampo as they stop right in front of his booth.
“Ayo, Gio! Long time no see!” Sampo laughs, his tone sarcastic and light. He wraps an arm around Gepard’s shoulders, as if unwilling to let go of him in any way. “I didn’t take you for the kind to haunt around this Tavern, but I knew I felt you here! What have you been up to, you old Fool?”
“Brother Sampo, delightful to see you, as always.” His voice is a low, lulling tone, despite how he has to raise his voice to be heard over the constant din of music. He glances down at his cards, tapping the table before looking up again. “I’m simply passing through and staying here a moment before moving on. It’s, frankly, much more strange seeing you here. Business as usual?” 
“Business as usual,” Sampo hums and nods, tilting his head in a harsh, jerking motion. “Sorry to, uh, interrupt your game, but I have a favour to ask you.”
“A favour?” There’s a pointed, sharp interest in his tone. Gepard stares at the smooth, two-toned design of his mask, suddenly jumping when he sees movement out of the corner of his eye. He looks to the mannequins, staring at them and challenging them to move again. “I don’t mind dealing in favours, especially with you, Sampo. I assume it has to do with…”
Gepard looks back at him, noticing the weight of Giovanni’s attention now on him. Sampo’s grip is tight, fingers digging into his shoulder. “Captain,” Gepard blurts out, “you can call me the Captain.” Sampo’s grip relaxes. The lips of Giovanni’s mask almost seem to lift. “Ah, the Captain, yes. It’s a pleasant surprise to see you here, Captain. Have you been well?”
“I’m doing well, G-Giovanni. It’s good to see you, too.”
“We’re on our honeymoon,” Sampo coos, making Gepard’s face heat up. Sampo gives him the opportunity to protest, but Gepard bites his tongue instead and lets Sampo squirm. “Uh-uhm, yeah! I’m showing him all the sights! The best places in the universe! Not this Tavern, though. This is an unfortunate pit stop I couldn’t avoid. You get it, Gio.” Giovanni just nods in response, lifting his hand and pointing to a mannequin across the table from him. He says a word that is static in Gepard’s ears, and the mannequin has vanished, a seat open.
“Gep,” Sampo whispers in his ear, pulling his attention. Gepard tries to look at his face--Sampo ducks away, just enough to cast shadows over his face. “You don’t mind keeping Giovanni some company here for a minute, do you? I’ll be back before you know it! Oh, don’t play poker with him, though.”
Gepard can’t help but tense, looking to Giovanni with narrowed eyes. “Why?”
“Because he’s a dirty cheater.”
“You shouldn’t project your own failings on me, Sampo Koski,” he says as he shuffles. The chips and the cards have shifted when Gepard wasn’t looking, Giovanni’s winnings now significantly lighter. “Would you like me to deal you in, Captain?”
“I’m okay, thank you.” He peels himself away from Sampo, sliding into the booth across from Giovanni. The music is instantly louder, now away from Sampo. “I won’t be staying long, after all.” Gepard says it with a pointed look in Sampo’s direction, making him snort. Sampo is looking away, only the portrait of his face visible. The little of his smile Gepard can glimpse looks stiff, plastic. “Thanks, Gio! I’ll be back before you know it, Captain.” 
He turns on his heels but hesitates. Gepard frowns, goes to ask if he’s okay, only for Sampo to move and surge towards him. He’s quick, the lights making him a blurred movement. Gepard feels Sampo’s lips on his cheek, strangely cold and smooth against his skin. It makes his chest swell regardless.
“See ya!” Sampo spins around and marches off, the dancing crowd parting for him. Gepard watches him all the way, seeking him out when he loses sight of Sampo. He can see the bar in the back from here, the inhuman bartender behind it. Gepard sees a familiar head pause by the barstools, the bartender going rigid like a statue. They move, turn towards Sampo, leaving all their customers who were begging for their attention abandoned without a care. The masks spin, shivering, settling on a massive mask with its expression twisted in something resembling fear. Sampo gestures, shrugs, makes wide, clipped motions with his hands as he says something that makes the bartender recoil. Sampo opens a door Gepard swears wasn’t there before, making the bartender go inside before following them in.
“How has Belobog been?”
Gepard turns back to Giovanni. The lights are overwhelming once more, the music piercing through his flesh, to his very core. It’s hard to focus on the other man, who’s looking down at his poker hand intently. “It’s… yes, Belobog is doing well. Nothing out of the ordinary since you’ve left.” It’s a lie, one Gepard doesn’t feel bad about. If Sampo hadn’t mentioned what had happened to his friend, Gepard definitely wouldn’t be the one to bear both their chests open. “You’ve… been well? You said you aren’t here for long. You’re traveling, I assume?”
“I’m not one to stay idle for long,” he hums, putting chips into the center of the table. The mannequins keep moving out of the corner of Gepard’s eyes, making him jump and stare at their still figures. They’re only animated, fully formed people when he isn’t looking at them, seeing people holding their cards and matching Giovanni’s bet, only to go still once more. Their faces are painted on with what looks like makeup, lipstick spread over their doll-like lips messily. 
“I am, frankly, surprised to see you away from your city, Captain.” Gepard looks back to him, watching as he collects his winnings from the mannequins. The sound of his chips clattering together sounds like bells. “Not to say I’m not glad. There is a lot of joy to be found in leaving home, seeing new things. I’m sure Sampo has treated you to some entertaining sights.”
“Honestly,” Gepard sighs, sinking into his chair just a bit, “I never thought I’d leave, either. I could never leave permanently, or travel forever like you do. But it’s been… phenomenal.”
“I’m happy for you.” Giovanni’s tone is the same, level and collected, but Gepard can tell he’s genuine. “Sampo Koski is well versed in… elation, after all. I wouldn’t have expected you to have found each other like this, moreso I’m shocked that that old Fool can settle, but I truly wish the best for both of you.”
He doesn’t really know what to do with this turn of conversation, covering his warm, blushing face with a hand. He laughs into his palm, watching talking mannequins just barely out of his focus. “Ah… thank you? It’s… we… yeah. Yeah.” He pauses a moment, the entirety of Giovanni’s words registering and making him frown. “What do you mean by that?”
Giovanni hesitates while shuffling, the cards in his hands slipping to the table. He huffs, dragging them back together in a clean stack. His movements are smooth, practiced as he shuffles, with unnecessary flourishes as he fans the cards, cascading them between his hands. It reminds Gepard of Sampo, the times they spent playing poker between the two of them, later with Seele once Gepard actually got the hang of it. Sampo is far, far more flashy with it, though.
“You have questions.”
Gepard does. Many of them, listless and disorganized in the confines of his skull. None of them are meant for Giovanni, though. “Are these actually people, or mannequins?”
“You know that’s not what I mean,” Giovanni says with a chuckle, dealing out cards. They glide across the table, settling perfectly in front of the mannequins. “Frankly, it is… unimaginable to me that Sampo would bring anyone here, let alone you.”
Gepard crosses his arms, sitting straight. “Why is that?”
“This place is… well, you see how it is.” Gepard doesn’t look away from Giovanni as he gestures out and around them. “Sampo has some… previous agreements that make him come here, but I know he would never set foot in this place if he could avoid it. But him bringing you to any Tavern? He has pulled risks in the past, but I thought he’d be more… careful.”
“I came in here of my own accord,” Gepard bites back, not hiding his defensiveness. “It’s my fault I’m even here. Sampo told me to stay away, but I came in myself.”
“Because you wanted in on the fun?” Giovanni says, “or because Sampo wouldn’t tell you why he’s here?” 
“I came in here to make sure he was okay.”
“You truly don’t need to worry about him in any Tavern,” he laughs, clicks his tongue, shakes his head like he’s talking to a child. “I think you know that, too. Sampo isn’t in danger here.”
“You’ve called him old,” Gepard blurts out, digging his fingers into his thighs. It bothers him, for some reason, this strange and unimportant thing. Giovanni seems to expect this, maybe knew he’d planted that niggling worry into his head, tapping his fingers on the table. “Yes, I did.”
“Why.”
“I’m sure Sampo has been careful with you, considering you will return to your planet.” The tap tap tap tap of his fingers on the tabletop send a hammer swinging against his skull. “But Sampo and I are old, especially for Masked Fools. We tend to get too involved in our performances, especially tragedies. Fools don't live as long as us. We have been around this universe… many times. And time isn’t kind in every galaxy.”
“You’re not answering, Giovanni.” He grinds his teeth. He has the rising feeling that Giovanni is taking delight in this, and it makes his hackles raise. “Tell me. What do you mean.”
“How old do you think he is?”
“Gio--”
“You’re probably right,” he interjects, pulling more chips to himself. One of the out of view mannequins shuffles the cards, and it grates on Gepard’s skin. “In your assumption, I mean. He isn’t technically much older than you, but he’s been around longer. 
“An example,” he hums, taps his chin, holding Gepard’s gaze. “I have an old business partner in the Klimt Republic. About five years ago, I left and journeyed across the galaxies to meet with merchants, business associates, sponsor the Interastral Tournament Festival, etcetera.” He leans forward, over his own cards and chips and towards Gepard. “I visited him, about a week ago. For him, 30 years had passed. He’d retired and his daughter was managing his business.”
Gepard doesn’t say a word, just watches the tight, careful way Giovanni raises his cards and throws them down on the table. Two aces stare up at them, vibrating on the table like they are going to take flight. Gepard hadn’t noticed the chips all collecting into the middle of the table, Giovanni chuckling lowly as he drags them towards himself.
“I don’t mean to alarm you,” he says without raising his head; Gepard doesn’t entirely believe him. “As I said, Sampo is careful when he wants to be. And knowledgeable, too. He knows the universe better than most do. If you haven’t noted any temporal discrepancies when messaging people, then there’s no harm, no foul.”
“Your name isn’t Giovanni.” Gepard’s words bubble over, not-quite questions that press between his teeth. His head hurts, his brain feeling too large in his skull. Giovanni shakes his head. “No, it is not.”
“Sampo Koski… isn’t his name, is it?”
Giovanni laughs, a full body cackle that sounds shrill and strange from the other man. Gepard grits his teeth, narrowing his eyes at the pulsing lights that taunt him from above. “Believe it or not, Captain,” Giovanni sighs, rubbing nonexistent tears from the eyes of his mask. He pauses to collect the credits the mannequins had bet, folding it neatly. “But it is. Out of every name he’s taken, it’s the truest.”
The cards have vanished, the chips gone, the mannequins nowhere to be found. It’s as if it had never existed, that Giovanni had been alone. Gepard stares down at the bare, worn table before looking back to Giovanni as he stands up, straightens his suit. “Sampo Koski is an exception.” 
He almost wants to ask what in the Aeons he means by that, but Giovanni is making a shocked noise in the back of his throat before he can. He looks down and raises his arm, peeling back his sleeve and looking at his bare wrist. “Ah! Apologies, Captain, but I’m afraid the time has slipped from me. I best be going. Please give Sampo my farewells, and tell him I’m sorry.”
His eyebrows raise, going to stand himself. “Sorry? For wh--”
Giovanni doesn’t say a word, spinning on his heels and straight into the wall. Gepard’s mouth hangs open on his unfinished words when he watches the wall seem to crumble in on itself, revealing a door out into a bright, golden cityscape. It unfurls behind Giovanni and returns to normal in an instant. Gepard bursts to his feet then, hands flat on the table as he gapes at where the other man had once been. He stares a moment, before slowly sitting back down, his stomach in his throat.
He doesn’t know what to do, if he should do anything besides sit there. The bar is overwhelming now without someone or something to focus on, a headache clawing up the back of his spine and digging in behind his eyes. Gepard sinks into the seat, avoiding looking at the writhing crowd of laughing and dancing people. He finds himself looking back to the bar constantly, as if Sampo is waiting for him there. But he isn’t. The bar remains unmanned, numerous customers having climbed over the counter to help themselves now, standing on barstools and sending glass bottles clattering to the floor. 
His anxious silence is interrupted quickly; “you look like you need some company!”
“No,” Gepard said instantly, looking up at the man leaning heavily on the table. He’s young, a thin but tall man practically holding himself up against the table. He isn’t wearing a mask, his grin still wide like the artificial smiles he’s seen on numerous predatory masks on other dancers. His eyes are fixated on him in a way that makes Gepard’s skin crawl.
“Aw, c’mon, don’t be like that!” The man coos, falling forward onto the table and leaning on his elbows, his chin in his palm. “Why’re you all alone in the corner like this? You should be having fun, dancing, drinking! No need to be all standoffish. I bet I can get you smiling in no time. What’s your name, friend?”
“I’m not your friend,” Gepard growls, standing up, “and I definitely don’t need you accosting me. Goodbye.” He really shouldn’t leave, should stay so that Sampo can find him easily, but the man keeps leaning closer and closer and Gepard feels like a cornered animal. He glances away, ignoring the man’s whined protest, squinting against his headache as he scans the crowd. He steps away, figuring he can just sit at the bar by the drunk, cackling patrons and wait for Sampo there.
He barely takes a step before a hand circles his wrist, fingers feeling cold like a chain, tight against his skin. Gepard bristles, his lip curled as he turns towards the grinning Fool. “Let. Go.”
“Why?” He giggles, pouts, tugs on Gepard’s hand. “Letting go is no fun! You know, you’d be happier if you just danced with me, let me buy you a drink. Why not have a good time, let loose, have some fun?”
Gepard responds by trying to rip his hand out of the man’s grip, but he falls forward with the movement, so close it’s suffocating. His breath smells of liquor as he laughs, eyes shining and too bright. “Ooooh you wanna slow dance instead? Why not just say so? I still haven’t caught your name, though. How ‘bout we trade? You can call me--”
“I don’t want to know,” Gepard growls out, lip curled. He flexes his fingers, feeling the cold swirl around his gauntlet as he clenches his fist and holds it back to strike. “Let go of me right now, or you’ll regret it.”
“How rude.” His smile is sharp, voice like a hiss. “Dance with me, and I’ll forgive you.”
Gepard gave in to the hot anger crawling up his throat, hoping that this wouldn’t cause Sampo too much trouble. “No. Don’t say I didn’t warn--”
He lungs forward as if to tackle him into the other crowded tables behind them. Gepard goes to meet him with his fist but doesn’t get the chance. There’s a surge of movement, a flash of red and purple and blue and the cackling, growling huff of indistinguishable words.that crackle in his ears. A clawed hand on his sternum pushes him back, the man flailing and shoved back like a marionette wrenched by its strings. The man yelps, something cracking as he’s shoved back onto the table and his head collides with the wood. Sampo towers over him as he yanks the man up by his shirt. 
“He said no.” Sampo’s voice is a fierce, screeching sound. The fog in the air almost dissolves, the music and the lights secondary to Sampo’s presence. The people nearest have all gone inhumanely still, heads craned in their direction as they pause in their card games or conversations or dancing. Gepard finds himself stunned still, too. 
“W-wait!” The man gasps, sounding choked on his own words. He goes to grab at Sampo’s arm but jerks away as if afraid to even touch him, struggling to kick back and away from him. “I-It’s-- I didn’t--”
“Did you not hear him the first time? Or the second?” Sampo grits out his words between his teeth, a sort of dangerous, humourous tone in his voice; a warning. “What makes you think you could grab him like that? Huh? Tell me.”
The man is shaking, eyes wide and manic as he breathes heavily, frantically. “I-I-I don’t--” He gulps, glancing around and behind Sampo as if for someone to save him. Not a single person makes a move, says a word, does anything but gawk with a sort of stunned, scrutinizing stare. His eyes landed on Gepard for only a second before Sampo shook him, saying something low that Gepard didn’t hear. “I-I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please, I thought-- I didn’t know that he’s y-your toy already. Please don’t--”
“Toy?” Sampo’s laughter is something shrill and echoing; crunching glass between teeth, violin chords snapping, the echoing ringing of bells, a bellowing horn. It makes Gepard wince slightly, but the people around recoil and groan in pain, hands over their ears as they lurch back. The man in Sampo’s grip looks like he’s going to be sick. 
“You are,” Sampo hums, his tight grip on the man’s shirt shaking, “are the worst kind of Fool. The kind who find their sick fun in messing with others? Toying with people and stringing them along. Is that right?” He accentuates his words with a chuckle, shaking the man slightly. Gepard is lost on what to do--until he sees Sampo reach for his dagger. “Is this really Elation, to you? Is there really any joy in making other people suffer, using them? You should thank Aha for not caring how you get your sick thrills, because I won’t--”
Sampo!” Gepard grabs his hand, his fingers a shackle around Sampo’s wrist and his other hand harsh on his shoulder. Sampo tenses and goes to twist towards him, giving Gepard the faintest flash of his face. His eyes are not just green, but swirling with specks of colour like confetti and glowing beyond what should be possible. His skin is too smooth, discoloured and unblemished and sparkling in a way that is entirely alien to Gepard. He sees his eyes widen, something sparking under his irises, before Sampo ducks his head away again. He’s rigid under Gepard’s grip. 
“Sampo,” Gepard gulps, pulling back on Sampo’s arm, peeling at his grip around the hilt of his dagger. The man still held in Sampo’s grip whimpers and begs but Gepard ignores it. “That’s enough. Just put him down and we can leave and never come back, okay?”
“But--”
“I’m alright,” Gepard interrupts, already knowing the words caught on Sampo’s tongue, “this wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle. I’m fine. I’d be better if we’d leave, though.” 
A muscle in Sampo’s jaw tenses. Gepard just watches him and ignores the weight of the attention on their backs. He watches as the tense, frigid line of Sampo’s shoulders slowly melts and softens. Gepard loosens his grips as Sampo sighs. He lets go of the men, unceremoniously dropping him and letting him fall back onto the table. He sucks in a panicked breath, not looking at either Sampo or Gepard as he scrambles frantically off the table, giving Sampo a wide berth as he bolts. 
The music is dulled, a faint pulse in the air. The entire Tavern feels different, tense like everyone was waiting for Sampo to snap again, to attack anyone. Gepard ignores it all, ignores the way masked faces follow him as he takes Sampo’s dagger from his hand, runs a hand across his back. “You’re done with what you needed to do?”
Sampo’s response was a delayed nod. “Yeah. Yeah. Sorry for the wait.” Gepard just shakes his head, Sampo watching Gepard out of the corner of his eye as Gepard holsters his dagger, intertwines their fingers. “Okay, good. If you can show me the way out, then?” He squeezes Sampo’s hand; it takes a moment for Sampo to squeeze back.
“Okay,” he sucks in a breath, exhaling harshly and shaking his head, “okay! Let’s get out of here!” Gepard is all too glad to be pulled along by Sampo, his grip a reassurance as Sampo takes him through the room. Heads swivel in mechanical unison to follow them, people once again parting for Sampo as he tugs Gepard through the dancefloor, moving in a strange pattern until they escape the crowd, a familiar door in front of them. Sampo doesn’t look back at him once, but hesitates a moment.
He spins around, towards the back of the bar. “Hey!” He yells out. Gepard follows his line of sight to the bar; the inhuman bartender stands behind it once more, but they hold themself… strangely, now. Their numerous arms shiver and shake as they messily prepare drinks, and at the sound of Sampo’s yell they jump and recede into themself, the crying mask gyrating. 
“Don’t forget our deal, my friend!” Sampo bellows out, one hand by his mouth. His teeth are just a bit too sharp when he smirks. “Or I’ll take matters into my own hands!” The bartender puts their dozens of hands over their mask before ducking behind the bar, Sampo’s laughter seeming to make the liquor bottles shake on the shelves. 
Gepard doesn’t get a chance to ask, though, confusion bubbling up his chest. Sampo doesn’t look at him, just squeezes his hand again before turning and shoving the front door open.
It’s quiet outside, just as it had been before. Leaving the Tavern is an instant relief; the hot, too-sweet weight of the air had been suffocating. Gepard can’t help but breathe in deeply and let out a sigh, even as Sampo still drags him towards their ship. 
Gepard enters the cockpit and collapses into the passenger chair, knocking his head back against the wall. Sampo’s movements are a relaxing sound, his presence enough to calm him down. Gepard just focuses on the scuffling sound of Sampo’s footsteps, the mechanical whirring of the engine coming to life, the thruming of the propellers lifting them from the dock and the clattering, rhythmic sound of the wings as Sampo guides them through the stars. The faint, dull ache in his head fades as time passes, as they get farther and farther away from that damned bar.
Sampo is the one to break the silence, his words making Gepard snap his eyes open; “I’ll take you straight back to Belobog. It won’t be long. Jarilo-IV isn’t technically that far from here and so I’ll make it quick--”
“What?” Gepard sits up quickly, snapping his head towards Sampo. The passenger seats are situated behind the pilot’s, leaving Gepard to just stare at the back to Sampo’s head. Stars and debris and various celestial bodies pass by them in streaks of colour, their movement a blur through the cosmos. Sampo doesn’t look back at him, doesn’t look at him at all as he speaks. Gepard desperately wants him to look at him. “Don’t worry ‘bout it, Gepard! You don’t… you don’t need to say anything! I’ll take you home as soon as I can and--”
“No.” Gepard bursts to his feet, marches to Sampo. The other man jumps when Gepard slams his hands down on the back of his chair, forcing him to spin around and face him. Sampo’s face is… back to what Gepard is used to. No signs of needle-point teeth or confetti eyes. But he still doesn’t meet Gepard’s gaze. “What in Qlipoth’s name are you saying, Sampo?”
“I-it’s-- you don’t need to worry, Geppie! I get it, okay? I get it. No need to say anything, I’ll… I’ll just take you back and be on my way--”
“What makes you think I want to leave you?” Gepard barks out, his voice a harsh noise. He grips either armrest tightly, leaning into Sampo’s space. Sampo cranes his head to avoid looking at him, making Gepard make a strangled, groaning noise in the back of his throat. “After everything, you think I want to return home now?”
“Yes! Obviously,” Sampo scoffs, finally meeting Gepard’s eyes. His expression is pinched. “C’mon, Geppie. That… that was too much, admit it. I put you through that, and now you want nothing to do with me.”
“You cannot. Decide that for me,” Gepard growls out, narrowing his eyes. “You can’t just decide for me, Sampo. It’s not your choice to make if I want to be here, with you, or not. And I do. There’s nowhere else I want to be.” Sampo’s eyes flash with something Gepard doesn’t quite catch, but his expression hardens again. Gepard claps a hand over Sampo’s mouth before he can say a word, his protests muffled against Gepard’s palm. “No! I’m talking now, so listen. I have no clue what happened in there, what that place was, what that place did to you. I’m frankly, confused, and concerned, and will absolutely ask you a lot of questions later. But that doesn’t make me want to leave you. And when I do go back to Belobog, you are coming with me, got it?”
Sampo is silent, completely still. Gepard doesn’t look away, doesn’t back down as Sampo traces his gaze over Gepard’s face, catching on his eyes. His eyes shine again, just the slightest bit. Gepard gives him just a moment before he breaks the silence again. “Do you understand me, Sampo? I’m not going anywhere.”
He feels him exhale against his palm, letting Sampo peel his hand off of his face with his mismatched fingers, holding his hand gently, reverent. “Are you sure?” 
Gepard doesn’t hesitate: “Of course I am.” He stands back up, Sampo’s grip on his hand lingering a moment like he’s afraid to let go. Gepard just watches as Sampo looks away, his mouth a thin line, his brow furrowing and relaxing like he’s trying not to argue. Eventually he sighs and let’s Gepard go, his relief tangible in the air.
“Besides,” Gepard says with a slight grin, crossing his arms, “you still need to take me to the giant space turtle.” Sampo laughs, glad for the escape Gepard is providing him. His smile is still a bit strained, Sampo’s vulnerability still seeping through the cracks, but he doesn’t seem so… frantic anymore. “Of course, of course! How could I forget.”
He hums, spinning around to the control panels. Gepard still has no idea what Sampo is doing as he runs his fingers over screens, but he feels the ship slowing, halting a moment before shifting directions through the vacuum of space. Gepard collapses back in his seat as they set off once more. 
“I do have one question, though.” Sampo tenses, making Gepard quick to finish his thought. “Are all Masked Fools’ Taverns… like that?” Sampo’s laughter is a cackle, his head thrown back. It’s soothing, comforting, familiar. Gepard’s smile is uncontrollable as Sampo looks back over his shoulder and smirks at him. 
“I promise you, they are not,” he snorts. He hums a moment, rolling his shoulders. “Some of ‘em are just as unhinged as that, yes. That’s one of the worst, though. All a bunch of old fashioned Fools! None of them know how to really have fun, I assure you. Some other Taverns, though… they can be a lot of fun.”
“We should visit one. A good one.” Gepard tacks on quickly when Sampo wrinkles his nose at him, clearly teasing by the way he rolls his eyes. “Of course. Some of ‘em make some amazing cocktails! Ones you can have, by the way. Maybe in Epsilon, but… well, no, actually. Epsilon tends to have some half decent Fools in it, but they’d still try and, uh, bamboozle you.”
“Sounds like fun,” Gepard says drily, pointedly rolling his eyes when Sampo wrinkles his nose at him. Sampo continues on with a hum, looking up at the softly passing stars. “Uh… where could I… oh! I could take you to Avalon!”
“Is that a Tavern?”
“Yep! The tavernkeeper isn’t actually a Masked Fool. She owns it though, I think she won the place in a game of blackjack? I don’t know, that’s what her husband told me. I met the Queen through him, actually. He’s some former knight or whatever--the most populated planet in that galaxy has some sort of monarchy thing going on, I dunno. But he’s a clutz and I stole from him at one point. He carries a lot of credits on him at all times. But then he just gave it to me and invited me to dinner! I thought he was coming on to me and considering how much cash he had… but uh, anyways. I haven’t seen the Queen in ages! Last I saw her she said she was gonna take over the galaxy system her Tavern is in, and uh, honestly I wouldn’t be surprised.”
“She’s a Queen?”
“Well… I dunno. We all just called her that. She’s scary so no one questions it-- in a good way! A good kind of scary, I promise.”
“I’m not doubting you,” Gepard chuckles, “I’m just… it’s nice, hearing about people you know, places you’ve been. Before, I mean.”
“Before Jarilo?” He says it with a scoff, but Gepard can hear the fond tone in his voice. It makes his chest warm, a sort of contentment settling in his bones. Sampo likes to complain about it, the constant cold, the standoffish people in Belobog, the loss of his criminal history, but Gepard knows better. He sees it in the way he asks about Serval, questions if Gepard has heard how Natasha is doing, how his city is holding up in his absence. It’s obvious in the way Sampo’s ramblings have started to center around Belobog and the Underworld. 
Sampo still pretends that he won't return, sometimes. That there's nothing left for him, that Gepard's planet doesn't have any reason for him to stay. Gepard knows it's not true, even now. Especially now. Because Gepard will always be there, wanting him. No matter how long Sampo has wandered the universe or what he's done before, who he was before.
“You know,” Gepard whispers, a secret. “Giovanni said something. Interesting things.”
“Giovanni.” Sampo hisses his name like a curse, slamming his fist on the control panels. The ship lurches to the side just slightly before Sampo corrects it. “That bastard! I can't believe he just left you there! Oh, if Gio thinks he'll get any favours out of Sampo Koski--”
“He said you're old,” Gepard continues, “well, kind of. That you've been around a long time. That time is… Strange, throughout the universe.” He pauses to watch Sampo, to see how he forces himself to relax, shuffling In his chair. “...and that you're old.”
“Don't worry.” Sampo's voice is a hushed tone. his expression as he looks back at Gepard isn't quite apologetic, Isn't quite sad. “I've been careful! Planned the routes out perfectly. Time won't escape you back in Belobog.” 
It isn't what Gepard means. They both know it. That Gepard wants to know Sampo, to peel him back and see who he is, what more there is to him. Sampo is infinite, varied; Gepard feels like he could spool through what makes him him forever. He wonders, sometimes, if he can know him fully, if even Sampo knows the entirety of himself. He wonders, and finds it doesn't change how he feels. 
“I love you,” Gepard says, because it's forcing its way out of him, from the depths of him. Because it's true. Sampo's smile is blinding, his ears starting to burn red. “Love you too, you softy.” 
He hums, thinking a moment. “...what else did Gio say?”
“That he's surprised you could settle down with me, I think?”
“I'm going to murder him next I see him.”
“No. Absolutely not.”
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commajade · 6 months ago
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youtube
finally watched watched my brothers and sisters in the north when it's been in my to-watch list for years and it was so touching and so beautiful.
the people interviewed were of course handpicked and have better conditions than other people because of the impact of U.S. sanctions and such, but it genuinely inspired me how hard-earned their good living conditions are. the farmers had to work really hard to re-establish agriculture after the war and now they get so much food a year they donate most of it to the state because they simply don't need it. the girl at the sewing factory loves her job and gets paid with 14 kilos of food a month on top of her wages. the water park worker is proud of his job because 20,000 of his people can come and enjoy themselves every day, and Kim Jong-un himself took part in designing it and came by at 2am during construction to make sure everything was going smoothly. his grandmother's father was a revolutionary who was executed and buried in a mass grave in seoul but in the dprk he has a memorial bust in a place of honor and his family gets a nice apartment in pyongyang for free.
imperialist propaganda always points to the kim family as a dictatorship and a cult of personality but from this docu it's so obvious that it's genuine gratitude for real work for the people, and simple korean respect. if my president came to my work and tried his best to make my working conditions better and to make my life better, i would call him a dear leader too. if my president invented machines and designed amusement parks and went to farms all over the country to improve conditions for the people, i would respect him.
the spirit of juche is in self-reliance, unity of the people, and creative adaptations to circumstances. the docu rly exemplified the ideology in things like the human and animal waste methane systems powering farmers' houses along with solar panels, how they figured out how to build tractors instead of accepting unstable foreign import relationships, and how the water park uses a geothermal heating system.
it rly made me cry at the end when the grandma and her grandson were talking about reunification. the people of the dprk live every day of their lives dreaming of reunification and working for reunification, and it's an intergenerational goal that they inherited from their parents and grandparents. the man said he was so happy to see someone from the south, and that even though reunification would have its own obstacles that we have the same blood the same language the same interests so no matter what if we have the same heart it would be okay.
and the grandma said "when reunification happens, come see me." and it's so upsetting that not even 10 years later, the state has been pushed into somewhat giving up on this hope. the dprk closed down the reunification department of the government last year and it broke my heart.
a really good pairing with the 2016 film is this 2013 interview with ambassador Thae Youngho to clarify political realities in the dprk and the ongoing U.S. hostility that has shaped the country's global image. the interviewer Carlos Martinez asks a lot of excellent questions and the interview goes into their military policy, nuclear weapons, U.S. violence and sanctions, and the dprk's historical solidarity with middle eastern countries like syria and palestine and central/south american countries like nicaragua, bolivia, and cuba.
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creedslove · 8 months ago
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EASTER WITH DAVE YORK 🔪 🐇 - HEADCANONS
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Dave York x f!reader
A/N: just what I picture spending this day with Dave would be like 🐰 Happy Easter besties and Dave apologists™
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• Dave's got a sweet tooth and nothing will ever convince me otherwise; he loves sweets, candies and above all, chocolate but his job demands him to keep fit and in shape under any circumstances, so besides all the working out he does nearly everyday, he also keeps himself in check, controlling his eating habits which means he restrains himself from eating too much sugar on regular basis
• but Easter he doesn't have to keep himself from enjoying things too much, quite the opposite, it's the day he actually allows himself to eat whatever he wants and you take the opportunity to spoil your handsome boyfriend. So you start by making him pancakes and chocolate chip cookies for breakfast, Dave loves it! He's excited to see you care so much for him, and he eats everything up
• of course you will exchange chocolate, just like the Easter tradition says, but it's not just any chocolate, it's BELGIUM CHOCOLATE 🤌 and he's immediately thrilled by it, you know how much he loves it and it warms your heart to see Dave's eyes sparkling over something so simple such as a chocolate
• but Easter Sundays aren't just a picnic either, because of course he's gotta visit his girls, even if it's just to drop by their gifts, but you know it always takes a toll on him, because Carol makes sure to annoy the hell out of him, and worst of all: using the kids for it
• ideally, Dave would prefer to spend some time with you and the girls, working on some bonding time and have fun as a family, but since the girls were little monsters towards you, acting up and being impolite, plus how Carol reacted afterwards, you both got into an agreement you wouldn't do it again, so he goes out to spend time with them and then comes back to you
• however, you both know it will probably be a disaster but what could he do? He missed his girls and he had made - with your help - a lovely Easter basket with some chocolate eggs, some of their favorite candy, a lip gloss each and a plushie bunny, just like when they were little, and he was hoping they'd be happy with it
• they weren't; and they didn't even try to hide it. They just got disappointed because Carol said if Dave spent too much on you, then he should give them new iPads for Easter and that's what they expected so when they saw the basket, they both rolled their eyes
"thanks dad"
"did you like it, baby?"
"yeah, whatever"
• and let me tell you: Dave kills people, he's rough and tough but those girls have the power to gut him, and after spending a lunchtime and mid afternoon clearly being told he's just bothering them or he's lame, he decided to take them back to their mother's and head home to you, regretting not spending Easter with someone who really deserved it
• when he got home earlier, you were surprised, thinking he would be home only later for dinner, but judging by his upset face, you could tell those means girls had to do with it. You hugged him and told him you'd make him great dinner, but he said no, instead, he told you you should both go out to eat at a nice restaurant
• you agreed, picking one you knew Dave loved and going with him to try and cheer him up. Easter was such a nice date, you hated he got upset because of his daughters' behavior and wanted him to have a special evening, so after the delicious dinner, you and him got home, telling Dave to wait for you in bed, you showed up to him in bunny ears and a bunny tail butt plug
• it was enough to cheer him up and make him excited, especially when he pulled you to him and you bounced on him like the naughty little bunny you were
• once you were both done, Dave held you tight against him, caressing your skin gently as you nuzzled his chest
"you know, honey... I've been thinking... Why don't we have a baby?"
• he casually said it, truth was: Dave missed being a dad, but above all, he missed having a child who actually loved him as a father and he knew things would work out with you this time because unlike his first marriage, your relationship with him was based on mutual love, passion and respect 💗
____
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thesleepyfable · 3 months ago
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Poor Gibbo, just hearing him crying and wailing in the game. It broke my heart! Literal chills! I like how you wrote about Gibbo dreaming of his wife. Which character in your opinion is easier to write?
Muir might be the most iconic of the infected, but Gibbo's my favourite because of how much there is to him that we don't know about.
For example: 'I've seen lights, under the ocean.' Is he talking about his time on the ships, or is he seeing through The Shape as it continues to mess with his head?
Plus, he's a softie. Everyone was going to have a dream. I'd written Gibbo's first and half way through Rennick's I realised, Gibbo's stuck with me the most. They all would have been laid out the same. Believe they're in a paradise involving someone close to them before it delves into a nightmare where they get infected again.
Character easiest to write: Caz. It's a mix between he's my favourite character and that we're with him all the time, so knowing what he says in various circumstances is easy to tell.
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suzyandthefox · 3 months ago
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hey hey hello hi I got into S/lay the P/rincess a few months ago and I don't have anyone to talk about it much with, I am SO down to hear your nom headcanons if you have any
my favorite princesses are the Beast and the Den (for obvious reasons lmao) as well as The Moment of Clarity, and the Apotheosis, so if you have any headcanons for any of them, I'd love to hear them. and/or just your favorite princess(es)! go wild, as few or as many as you'd like to share, no pressure either way
I'd also like to hear if you have any headcanons for TLQ, whether as pred or prey, beeg form or smol. lobve the lil birb man. I like to think he'd be a switch :>
(sorry if this is a lot lmao. love your work!)
Thank you so much!!
Fellow S/lay The P/rincess fan, I'm glad we can share the brainrot together, I was working on my fan princess at some point (will drop the art underneath a break)
For this Ask I'm going to explore ALL the vessels and tell you which ones can eat other than the beast and which ones can be eaten.
Of course: Major warnings for spoilers
TLQ: My beloved,my lovely baby bird, He is what I call a True Switch, which is when someone fits perfectly both as pred and as prey, he is built like that.
Base Princess: She changes depends on your perception to her, but generally, she is just a normal woman. She can't vore.
Adversary/Eye of the Needle: Big strong muscle lady, shaped like an Oni (which I'm like 100% sure was the intention) and In a lot of mythos,Oni swallow their enemies whole. However, she would like a fair, engaging fight and swallowing you whole mid-fight wouldn't be very fair or fun.
I say, given the right circumstances, Adversary/Eye of the Needle can vore!
Maybe she would like to incapacitate you, or give you somewhere to rest momentarily before continuing the fight, or see if you can tear her apart from the inside out.
The Fury: Hates you and Hates you and Hates you and Hates you and Hates you and_ can't vore solely because swallowing you whole would be too merciful and she wants to shred you into a million pieces.
Tower/Apotheosis: All I wanna do, is see you turn into, A GIANT WOMAN, A GIANT WOMA_
Extremely beeg lady, she makes sure to ham into your head how insignificant and tiny you are, displaying her dominance over you, and of course, what better way to display dominance than to literally make you a part of herself?
She can make herself your gilded cage, your home, not only would she take her very sweet time enjoying your taste, teasing you and telling you how much of a delectable little morsel you are, but she would keep teasing you even after you reached her stomach.
She would tell you things like how this was all meant to happen and that your only choice is to wait for your fate like the meal you are, etc.
Not only can The Tower/The Apotheosis vore, she's very much a cruel bastard Pred.
The Witch: "I probably won't bite" (It's a fucking lie)
Little meow meow >:3, She would be in for the chase and the biting, but can't actually vore, she will 1000000% bite you though, and make it hurt.
The Thorn: MY WIFE MY BEAUTIFUL WIFE MY SWEETIE PIE_ The Thorn is one of the princesses that's lets herself be vulnerable to you, this route is all about trust and allowing yourself to be weak to the other.
And well, is there's any bigger sign of trust than safe vore?
After freeing her from the thorns, She would be weak, tired, in pain from all the thorns that hurt her and wrapped her.
If she was smaller, imagine if we could put her somewhere comfortable and warm, ease her pains.
"We must keep her as close to us as possible, away from this harsh,cold world that will hurt her fragile body" Smitten says as you look at her,she actually became smaller...
You do, indeed, want to keep her as close as possible, underneath your heart, within yourself, hidden safely in your depths.
You confess to her about your intentions, promising to her that you will protect her with your life... She hesitates, but agrees, you didn't hurt her before, why would you now?
Almost as natural as breathing itself, you tuck her in, your innards gently yet eagerly receives your lover, knowing who she is and what they have to do.
Smitten is absolutely Thrilled to have the princess inside the body, it's literal extreme cuddling after all, and being able to feel her movements within? Every delicate touch to your flesh? Knowing that she trusts you with her life? He literally can't be happier.
Hero still thinks it's inhumane and strange to swallow another living being whole like this, even if he knows the body is safe for the princess he is still squeamish about all of this.
Oops I wrote a whole mini fic, Can you tell she's my favourite? (I'm boring Ik but this route is genuinely the sweetest thing ever)
The Wild: A web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves lain upon a web of nerves_ Technically can't vore because you're already a part of her and she's a part of you.
The Wounded Wild: You seperated yourself from her, but your heart yearns, you feel that a part of you is missing, an emptiness inside you twists and turns like a hungry void, would you make yourselves one again? Even by force?
The Beast/The Den: Canon vore, enough said.
The Damsel: She's very demure,very cutesy, she would do anything you ask her to do, even if you eat her alive, she won't fight against you, "I just want to make you happy!"
As with the thorn, Smitten would be thrilled, but Hero would find more than one wrong thing with this.
The Grey/The Spectre/The Nightmare/The Wraith: These are all Ghosts, I don't see much vore potential here, outside of Spectre possessing you.
The Prisoner : Least vore potential tbh, 0% , can't see it happening.
The Stranger: "Who are you calling weird? Just kidding, we know we're weird. And so are you." Would make for an interesting pred with an interesting anatomy if she was a pred.
The Razor: Stabs
The Shifting Mound: There's an ending where she makes you a part of her, I guess that counts as vore.
And here's my own fan Princess: The Mouse!
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Anyway I hope you enjoyed this! Thanks for asking!
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death---dealer · 5 months ago
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from concerned anon,
please be cautious moving forward, with trying to have a baby. Children can change the dynamic of the relationship drastically for the worse due to the parents being unprepared and in a lot of cases, unfit . and a lot of husbands change after children come into the picture .
make sure your husband doesn't become or already is a child you constantly have to clean up behind, and you, as the woman should not be solely responsible for the majority of the domestic labor of the home ...
there's too many stories of men cheating on their spouse while she is pregnant, and using children to trap women to keep them away from their careers and hobbies / to slow them down
babies are extremely expensive and are an insane amount of work . not even including the several health risks for you, the mother.
i just really hope your husband is an actual good man and is actually worthy of a wife and children (99% of men are not due to societal conditioning)
i watch ceciliaregina275 , sheisapaigeturner and other related stuff on tiktok for tons of extremely valuable , educational and basically life saving content for women when it comes to men, dating, children, etc .
just want to make sure you are in a safe, secure, and healthy relationship ... and are making the best decisions for you
Hiii. Thank you kindly for the concern and I really appreciate you reaching out to me regarding. I really don't share much about my life regarding my husband and such because no one knows the inner-workings of our relationship.
I trust my husband - he trusts me. I think that is a very good basis and we've been on and off talking about having a child for the last year. I am Diabetic, and it was a heavy thing on my agenda to get myself in the best shape possible for a baby, and my husband was incredibly supportive of that, considering pregnancy for me will be considered very high risk. I am supporting my husband as he goes through some things for his OCD - both of us recognizing that they are pressure points that could and most likely will flare up upon the arrival of a baby. We have learned great coping and to learn how to depend upon each other in circumstances of need.
This has been a discussion we've had for three years. We have followed the plan we set for ourselves since then. We moved into an apartment together, we got engaged, we had a wedding, we got a house ( this year baby ) and I actually wasn't the one to bring it up first - My husband did, and he told me he felt it was time, that we are both ready and we are both equipped with proper tools.
Like said, thank you so much for taking time to send me this, I really do understand where you are coming from, but like said, no one here knows the inner-workings of our relationship, etc. Be assured that I myself have done a lot to ensure I am ready ( I am also the youngest of 7 and have seen all of my siblings go through it. In fact, my brother is going through it right now with his incredibly narcissistic and emotionally abusive wife and I am taking notes ). I was also in a very abusive relationship before I met my husband, and ended up having to do some things I wish I never had to do and never thought I'd have the chance again. So, thank you again. The concern is heart warming, and I am posting this message in case someone else needs it.
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toxicanonymity · 2 years ago
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Objectification Headcanons
Michael Myers; Corey Cunningham
1.2k words | Gender Neutral / Varied Reader
when Michael Myers is staring out a window, he's broadcasting that he's available for your use. all you have to do is go inside and approach him if you wanna get dicked down. highly recommend.
post-Michael Corey Cunningham? he's basically always open for business. he doesn't even need to broadcast it because everyone knows, and we love him for it.
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NSFW 18+ Variety of depravity within.
thx @dark-scape for helping me figure out what to call this lol. Corey tag list: @ethanhoewke
Michael Myers
When you walk in, he'll turn around like so. Guarantee he's already hard by the time you cross the room. Just seeing you turns him on.
If you want to get railed, all you have to do is run your hand over the bulge in his jumpsuit. This activates Classic Michael where he'll fuck you with no mercy.
In Classic Mode, if you want a specific position, you just need to assume that position. Want it against the wall? Stand with your back to the wall. Doggy? Get on all fours.
In Classic Mode, he is relentless. The catch is that you have to cum. If you try to leave before you cum, you might get your throat slit. I wouldn't risk it. For him to come, normally it won't take him long after you, if not instantaneously.
If you need Michael's cock down your throat, all you have to do is get on your knees and be ready for eye-watering face fucking.
To activate Feral Mode, unzip his jumpsuit and let the sleeves hang down. All bets are off now. He may pull your hair, smack your ass, pick you up and switch to different locations.
Feral mode is not for the faint of heart. Michael may get creative. You need to be okay with injuries. You will be bruised at the least.
If you prefer to ride him, grab his bulge more forcefully to activate Sub Mode. He'll walk stiffly and slowly to the nearest comfortable surface and sit or lay down. In this mode, you have to initiate everything, including unzip him. But don't be surprised if he can't help but add some thrusting power. He's human after all.
In Sub Mode, you are free to use his monster cock as a dong. You can impale yourself right away or rub that big veiny masterpiece between your legs for friction. You can do this until you come or impale yourself when you're ready. Feel free to also suck him off for extra rigidity and lube.
You may not under any circumstances remove his mask
You can put him up against the wall and fuck yourself on his rod. He's much better than a suction cup dong.
In sub mode, the catch is that HE has to come. You can't use him and leave him with blue balls.
Bottom Mode isn't guaranteed, but if you want Michael to take a dick or strap-on, strip him all the way down and finger him while you suck his dick first. If he does take it in the ass, be prepared for him to turn the tables violently at some point. There's a small chance he'll slash you, but that just adds to the excitement.
Regardless of what mode you want, you can up the intensity by bringing him someone to slash. The kill will make him rock hard.
Even when he's not staring out a window, you'll learn to recognize that far-off gaze. If you approach him in someone's yard, be ready to put on a show - there won't be time for a change of venue. Beware though, If it turns out he's in hot pursuit and you interrupt him, you might have a bad time.
Corey Cunningham (Post-Michael)
Let's be real, you don't have to catch Corey at a window or even in a trance. Unless he's occupied with a kill, another lover, or Michael, he's open for business.
That being said, poor Corey stared out the window for hours in the Halloween Ends Novelization and no takers noticed. :(
Corey's different modes can be activated verbally and with social cues in addition to touch.
He offers a little more than Michael in some ways - Corey is a kisser, gives head, is much more emotional and expressive than Michael, and is pretty open minded.
To activate Shape Mode, just check Corey out and make it obvious you like what you see. Corey will need to make you his, but he also needs to see you want it. He wants you to need him before he'll whip it out.
His eyes will darken and he'll become extremely seductive and persuasive. He'll grab your head with both hands and kiss you so fucking hard and smooth, you'll swoon. He'll back you into the wall or nearest surface.
He'll gaze into your eyes, put his fingers in your mouth, grind himself on you. His huge hands will roam all over your body until you're begging for his cock, and then he'll tease you with it, humping you, stripping you, rubbing against your dripping sex until you're dying to have him inside you.
An alternate way to activate Shape Corey is to find him at the shop and say your car has a rattle.
If you're a regular, he'll remember what you like.
In Feral Mode, Corey will choke you. He'll bend you over the furniture or take you against the wall. He'll talk dirty to you. He knows his voice drives you crazy. He'll tell you what a slut you are and how good you take his fat dick.
In Sub Mode, Corey will be a whimpering mess. His default will be to get on his knees and desperately nuzzle his head in between your legs, begging you to let him please you and you can instruct him from there.
He is more than happy to give you head. Be sure to give him lots of praise. He will eat pussy like he he's starving. He also eats ass and can slob a good knob.
If you want to suck him off, he'll whine and whimper and beg. But if you tell him to fuck your face, he'll do that too. He will probably narrate the whole time with dirty talk.
If you have Corey lie down or sit down for you to ride him, he'll be very vocal. His groans and moans might send you over the edge on their own. Those big hands will rove. He will not be still.
To activate Bottom Mode - if you want Corey to take a dick or toy - press it against his pants or jumpsuit and firmly drag it along his crack all the way to his balls and he'll eagerly cooperate.
In general, if he says Michael's name at any point, take it as a huge compliment. If you say Michael's name, you might not be able to walk the next day.
Corey Cunningham (Pre-Michael)
Post-Accident, Pre-Michael Corey would have been very hesitant and suspicious that you could even want to use him.
He would get hard, but he wouldn't have the confidence to worship you like the standard Sub Corey.
Turn him on enough and he would end up begging. An example is when he was working at the mall kiosk.
He wouldn't be expressive until he was physically inside you and even then he might be afraid that it's a trick.
I don't think pre-accident Corey would ho around or offer himself up for use, but he could be DTF in the right circumstances.
Corey & Michael
Corey and Michael do NOT have a free use arrangement with each other. Their dynamic is more complicated.
At first, Corey would have considered himself free for Michael's use at any time, but Corey doesn't take rejection well. As time goes on, he lashes out (i.e., taking the mask).
Unfortunately for Corey, Michael is never at his disposal. Corey is always going to be at Michael's mercy for whatever Michael will give him, if anything, at any given time. He may savor the occasional crumb like being permitted to grind himself against Michael's thigh with both of them fully clothed right after a kill.
Anything else is most likely to be situational, catching Michael in the heat of a kill , and may involve a third party.
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hestzhyen · 4 months ago
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Insect Symbolism in the Edgy Sword Manga Pt. 2
Part 1
Hello internet void, I am back on my bullshit. It's mushibachi time once more. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ Let's take a look at the critter powers showcased by Kyoura and Magatsumi in Chapter 42: spider, dragonfly, and centpede.
Spider
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[sticky situation joke here]
Nice utility spell! We don't actually see the spider itself, just the web trapping Chihiro. I also don't have access to the raws to see what the OG text is so I'll assume it's the general word for spider ("蜘蛛", kumo).
Obviously, the legends of the tsuchigumo and jorogumo could be the inspiration here. They're famous yokai that deceive humans with shape shifting and clever traps in order to harm them. Spider webs themselves are pretty on the nose visuals for being ensnared in someone else's plans.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, spiders often represent patience and the intricate interconnected nature of life. They're also sometimes signs of good luck depending on the circumstances where you find them. I don't think Chihiro feels particularly lucky having to face off against his dad's Civilian Destroyer 9000 but hey, you can't win every symbolism roulette. At least it can't be unsheathed and used to its maximum potential!
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...Cold comfort, huh?
Dragonfly
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BEAM MOVE! Maybe. I want to see what this was actually going to be...!
This feels like a "sure kill" move to compliment the web ability. Good on Hakuri for sending Hiyuki in to save our MC!
Dragonflies have a lot of symbolism tied to them, so I'll only be talking about what I think is relevant to Magatsumi.
The meaning of Tonbo (Dragonfly): ton (“勝”) is victory/win in Kanji, and bo (“虫”) means insect. This is why dragonflies were a popular symbol of courage for the brave-hearted Samurai warriors (in) the Edo (Period) (1615–1868), (possibly even as early as) the 11th Century. The speed, agility, and strength of the samurai is it? Very interesting that we get samurai imagery associated with another Sazanami member! Unlike Hakuri though, I don't think it's direct commentary on Kyoura's character. Hakuri is directly connected to the bravery and persistence of the praying mantis in Chs. 19 and 30, but the symbolism of the dragonfly is tied to the sword instead of Kyoura. I wonder if this was an ideal imbued during the forging process...? Really really want the lore so I can go absolutely nuts with why these creatures in particular were used.
Similar to butterflies, dragonflies are also associated with change, transience of life, and death. They can be interpreted as the souls of the dead, or messengers between the living world and yomi. So much spirituality and death with this sword man. Butterflies, lilies and irises, and now dragonflies. Yeesh.
And lastly, they are seen as spiritual guides and protectors of children... who keep them safe from harm... Good thing the war crime sword wasn't able to murder the son of the guy who made the damn thing. (Will Hakuri and Hiyuki always be there to protect Chihiro when people use his dad's legacy against him? Hm.)
But yeah. No wonder that one didn't get to fire off. Fuck you, Kyoura and rest in hell. With all due respect.
Centipede
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Thanks for making one of my most hated creatures look super cool, Hokazono. Bonus fun fact: Japanese centipedes are venomous! Even more reason to dislike them!
This seems to be an AoE knockback ability suited for defense and countering rather than purely offense. Guess each sword will have one utility, offense, and defense move each.
Centipedes have mixed interpretations. On the one hand, they are another symbol of perseverance and adaptability since they can keep squiggling and moving forward even if they lose part of their body. On the other hand, they are also bad omens associated with misfortune. I can't think of a more apt creature to represent this sword, honestly. And it's a neat encapsulation of the buildup to Kyoura's end in chapter 43.
Kyoura is nothing if not persistent even when he should be dead. He's also willing to use the premier piece of merchandise at the auction to keep going, highlighting his adaptability (in terms of running the Rakuzaichi anyway) that's been on display since chapters 22 and 23:
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Thanks as always for the clarifying internal monologue, Mr. Shiba. Last image intentionally badly cropped because Hakuri is my favorite.
If Hakuri is a praying mantis, then surely Kyoura is a centipede. Venomous, dogged, flexible, and deserving to be killed on sight (mostly /jk on the last one. Mostly).
Again, the abilities demonstrated by the Magatsumi aren't necessarily direct commentary on Kyoura himself- we'll probably see the same imagery again when someone else uses the sword. Got a lot of speculation as to why this sword is so fucked up with death and spiritual flowers and critters that also have many positive connotations around samurai, strength, and resilience though... especially since it was the shinuchi of the batch that turned the tides and won the war... please give us more backstory so I can go full on tinfoil hat and red string tack board with this!
There's also the mythic creature Omukade, a man-eating yokai with the form of a giant centipede. Not sure if it has any implications for Magatsumi itself, but I like the thought of capturing the essence of monsters to make a monster of a weapon.
Not that I think there are actually yokai or kaiju in this setting; I think Kagurabachi is using these swords as a WMD allegory. Man creates his own hell on earth in an arms race despite the best of intentions and all. Or perhaps out of shortsightedness, victory at all costs, any reason you can think of. We'll have to see Seitei War lore to see if I'm right about that or not. (Please let me be right. Just once in my life, as a treat. ;_;)
I hope the upcoming arc sheds some light on all this... Chihiro's looking for answers so surely we'll learn something! For now, let us commune with the Magatsumi to endure and adapt to this week without Kagurabachi Sunday.
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gallusrostromegalus · 2 years ago
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So how eldritch can we expect your version of Hollows to be? Because if there's one thing I take joy from the various fandoms you stick your fingies into is the extremely enjoyable (cursed) way you describe the gods/monsters
I'm definitely looking forward to all these Bleach shenanigans~ :3
Have a Sample:
*
He doesn't sleep.
Kaname just lies there, fingertips tracing over his chest. It bothers him now that his skin is unblemished. There should be something, he feels. A ring of raised flesh, an abrasion, something?Surely this feeling in his chest means he's about to become one of them.
He presses his chest, trying to feel it out. His heart still beats, his lungs ache- Maybe it's in his Liver. You can live without half a liver, can't you? Or was it gallbladders? Retsu had told him, once, when-
He does not cry out. He swears he can feel the hole growing every time he thinks of someone who was ever kind, who ever trusted him, of Shuuhei and Saijin and home and anything more than surviving the next hour. He does not cry out, but he can't grit his teeth hard enough to hold the little whimper entirely in.
Unfortunately, it's enough to wake his companion.
Wonderweiss is a pure creature, and even under better circumstances, Kaname isn't entirely sure he could deny him anything. Under these circumstances, he's given to spoiling the creature. So the small Arrancar had been allowed to curl up beside him, sleeping with his back to Tousen and his face to the door. Saijin used to do the same, when they traveled together, at least in new villages.
Perhaps he couldn't deny himself the faint comfort of another warm body. Perhaps he feels like he deserves the way the memory cuts at him. Perhaps he hopes the memory will finally cut his chest open.
But Wonderweiss stirs at the noise, sitting up. He sleeps at a twisted angle, chest flat on the bed and hips nearly facing the ceiling. When he moves, Kaname feels Weiss' top half rise, but not the bottom, like his spine is little more than a polite suggestion.
"Ahm?" He asks, nudging Tousen.
"I'm fine." Kaname lies.
"Hmg." Weiss grunts, sitting up all the way and patting at him, humming with concern. Small soft hands on his face, arm, shoulder, stomach-
"Weiss?" He frowns. "Did you grow more hands?"
"Ah!" Weiss chirps.
"...Good Job?" he tries. He can feel the edges of his eyes burning with exhaustion, even when they're closed. More hands. Sure. Why not?
"-I wondered if I would learn what kind of a freak you were before you died." Gin drawled from the doorway. "Have to admit, didn't think you'd be into-"
Wonderweiss made a noise that roughly served the same function as a growl, but sounded like it had been turned inside-out, a low, wet thumping from the middle of the Hollow's chest. Weiss started to get up and Kaname felt the bed dip like the hollow had also tripled in size overnight.
"Fuck off, Gin." He groaned, sitting up and wrapping his arms around what he hoped was Weiss' abdomen. "Don't bother, he'll only give you a stomachache." He mumbled, tugging a bit against Weiss, who had previously been roughly the size and shape of a small child, but now seemed to be taking on the scale and proportions of a moose.
"I mean I shouldn't be surprised, you always did have a soft spot for animals-" Gin teased, and Weiss gave him another wet growl. "-Seriously, you feel safe enough to sleep with this thing?"
"If Grimmjow or Baraggan decides to do me in, that's one less warm body between you and The Old Man whenever push comes to shove." Tousen shrugged, tugging more insistently at Weiss, who seemed to sit back a bit. "The microsecond it takes him to blow through me might be your only chance to slither off like the coward you are."
Gin didn't immediately respond. "You know how lucky you are that you can't see that thing, right? He looks like a pipe organ made of ribcages."
Weiss trilled a short set of scales smugly.
"Is. Is it actually supposed to be doing that?" Gin asked, sounding almost genuinely concerned. "I thought it wasn't supposed to shapeshift until-
There was the faint sound of Gin's foot crossing the threshold into the room.
Wonderweiss' furious screaming probably woke every hollow in Hueco mundo, if not the lighter sleepers in the soul society. A high, almost metallic scraping noise, like a knife on a chalkboard, followed by a deep, resonant boom as something elaborate that Kaname absolutely did not remember including in Weiss' specs happened in the Hollow's thorax, and the wall opposite the door exploded.
Ah. The "wonder" in Wonderweiss. Must be short for "Wonder what the fuck that was". "Fuck!" Yelped Gin, and the Hollow launched off the bed, galloping after him through the echoing halls of the city.
Kaname sat on the edge of the bed, contemplating chasing after them. On one hand, he didn't want Weiss to come to any harm. On the other even the effort of sitting upright was making his arms shake and stomach churn. He realized he was rubbing his chest again, searching for the hole that had to be forming there.
Well, if he became a Hollow, perhaps he'd become a bastard-eating one like Weiss and devour Aizen. It'd serve him right after all this. There was some dark comfort in that thought and slowly, he rolled back onto the bed and tried lying still with his eyes closed again.
Kaname does not sleep.
He does manage to stop thinking for a while and is nearly startled when Weiss returns, humming cheerfully. He feels like he's returned to his regular size and number of limbs now, as he climbs awkwardly over where Kaname had rolled onto his stomach to rest.
"Kahnm?" Weiss tries, nuzzling at his shoulder.
"I'll be alright." he mumbles, reaching up to pat Weiss' head and this time, it almost feels like it might be the truth.
Satisfied, Weiss settles over Kaname this time, probably only two arms folded over his side and chest resting across Kaname's back, legs sprawled out to the side like a great cat as he resumes his vigil of the doorway. The weight is comforting, and more presicent in his mind than the sensations in his chest.
This time, Kaname sleeps.
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