#at least on twitter i can lock my account and i don't think it shows the person you liked their tweet if your account is locked on there

[jaekkii]

is anyone else on this web site afraid to like and reblog posts from people you follow because you have the feeling they'll get annoyed with you or that they'll look at your blog and be like "ew what a loser you should kill yourself" or is it just me.

[science-lings]

More info on the options below the cut

1- My guy just lost his job and has to live out of his old office there's no way he can be allowed to adopt Trucy immediately, but if he had a rich husband who lives overseas and lets them technically commit fraud by moving into his old apartment during social worker visits... that would be much easier. Edgeworth isn't against being a little underhanded in his methods with the law and he has witnessed Phoenix with the Feys so if an infamous attorney were to adopt a child left behind by a tragic trial, he'd be so glad it was Phoenix. That guy has been reeking dad energy for years. It's also important to note that no one doubted the authenticity of their relationship since they went to go sign the papers because most people who have seen them already assumed that they were together. They don't have to try to convince anyone.

2- The things they call each other are so important to me, as kids they're Miles and Phoenix/Nick, in court they're Mr. Edgeworth and Mr. Wright, outside of court but still in a professional setting they're Edgeworth and Wright, when they're flirting they're back to Miles and Phoenix, but when they're insufferably flirting, Pheonix is 'Mr. Edgeworth' and Miles is 'Mr. Wright' They do this before they get married, both legally and actually.

3- They would be so funny on a reality tv show or some kind of game show, if their motive is doing something better than the other, they will put their whole pussies into whatever that thing is, even if it's like the great british baking show and Phoenix is the only one who can kind of bake. If they get to work together they're insane, put these assholes in an escape room and they will fuck that shit up. With Miles, who learned how to pick locks, and Phoenix, who got used to puzzles when working with Professor Layton, they would speedrun an escape room.

4- idk Pheonix just seems like he gets super affectionate with the people he loves, he kisses Trucys forehead/head so constantly it's habitual for him to pop off her hat to smooch her scalp and replace it right after. I also think it would be funny if he was so unprofessional about his love for Edgeworth except when they're in court but that's because they have to stand like twenty feet away from each other. Edgeworth turns red every time but he rarely protests, at least not seriously.

5- I just think they should be each other's 'oh shit' moment because that is funny to me. Phoenix didn't really realize he was attracted to men, at least in that capacity until that newspaper article and Miles had accepted that he was aro until he caught feelings he thought he was immune to. They both deal with it so well... /s

6- Connected to my hc that lawyers in the AA universe get kind of a celebrity status, but both Phoenix and Miles are so offline that they are completely unaware of it. Maya and Trucy and Kay especially are definitely not unaware and they think it's so funny. They contribute to the rumors. There are Edgeworth and Phoenix fancams made from court footage set to kpop. Apollo had a Phoenix Wright stan account and he used to fight the PW haters on twitter before he actually met the guy. He forgot the password so he can't delete it and it's only a matter of time before someone connects the dots. Anyway they trend on twitter every time they meet in court like when a new season of a show comes out and the fanbase goes bonkers.

7- obviously they call and message each other but they both think it's nostalgic to send letters, and Phoenix likes having a reason to send physical pictures from when they were kids since Miles wasn't allowed to keep any of that in the Von Karma household. Edgeworth usually sends sweets from whatever country he's in for Trucy.

8- I personally think that Phoenix has more of that kitten look but I was recently reminded of how often in the of trilogy when ppl have to tell him to put those things away. He can weaponize his big brown eyes and Miles pretends to be unaffected but he's weak to it just like everyone else. He has that kitty vibe, he asks for things by looking really pathetic and sad and it works in his favor every time.

9- Phoenix is the type of guy to fall asleep during most movies if he isn't judging it intently or particularly interested and when they were kids they tried to binge more than one samurai movie and Phoenix fell asleep before the first one ended. That official art just makes him look like such a sleepy guy. Again the kitty energy returns, he's a big napper.

10- these bitches are so good at arguing, but they both want to win so it takes forever to decide on things that actually don't matter that much. If they can't decide on a restaurant to go to for a date they won't finish arguing their case about their preferred place to go until after they close. They never yell at each other or get too emotionally invested in a lot of things but they will draw that shit out and take out evidence and witness testimony if it helps their case. Sometimes it gets so extensive that they have to pull out the whiteboard/ corkboard. Just as long as it's presented like a court case it will be so well communicated between them so they take advantage of that because or else they kinda suck at talking to each other about their problems.

[stormblessed95]

Hi, sorry if it's late, but can I ask for your persoal top favorite queer books and (maybe) your top fav fanfiction (from any fandom but your all time fav)? Thanks so much.....

Also why do you think mlm or wlw romance is more interesting than mlw (het) romance?

Feel free if you want to ignore the last ask, thanks for your blog....

Why do I personally enjoy gay romances to het ones? Preference and taste probably. I also tend to enjoy the angst, longing, tropes, passion, etc in the way its written more than I do in the ways those things are written between a straight couple. And that's not to say I don't enjoy straight romances either! I have plently of het ships I love too, and a few good romances that aren't gay 😂 I just have a preference, and that's okay! As for recommendations!! I have a LOTS! If you want to tell me about what YOU like to read, I can give even better recs. But for in general, some of my favorites...

I have posts about QUITE A FEW here already that you can check out (please do)!:

^ you'll find queer characters in most of the lists of recs honestly at least somewhere. BUT I do have posts specific for Sapphic, Achillian and Ace recs there. So start there!

I'll also throw in that I'm recently quite obsessed with fantasy Sapphics with swords in my books lately! So books like "The Jasmine Throne." "This is How You Lose The Time War." "Priory of the Orange Tree." "Gideon the Ninth." "Girls of Paper and Fire" and "Legends and Lattes."

Come back for me if you want more!

And some of my favorite fics (of various fandoms! Exciting!) In no particular order, I'll link a few for you!

That Isn't Nothing by Taekookschanbaek

(I KNOW OKAY, in my defense I didn't realize the authors name until AFTER I read and loved the fic lmfao but it IS SO good, I promise lol)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "A look into the lives of pro exy players Andrew Minyard and Neil Josten. The world says they hate each other, but when Andrew gets transferred to Neil's team, their teammates begin seeing something else between them."

In Which Neil is a PR Nightmare by CoverYourEyes

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Eve was not the best person in the world. Sometimes she didn’t hold the elevator open when she saw people rushing to catch it from the other side of the lobby. Cutting the line at Starbucks was a semi-regular action. But Eve did not deserve to be Neil fucking Josten's publicist.

**********

Or, the one where Neil does what he wants, picks fights with reporters, discovers Twitter, breaks the internet, and really shouldn't be allowed out of his house. Andrew does nothing to discourage him."

The Men In Apartment 22B by jjmash

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Andrew and Neil's new neighbors are extremely confused about the two mysterious men in 22B. Are they dating? Are they in the mafia? Are they rival assassins who've fallen in love? As always, the truth is stranger than fiction."

Blame It On My Youth by youreyestheyglow

(Locked fic, you need an account. This fic is THICK but it's by far one of the best Andriel fics I've ever read or just in general. SO GOOD and so emotional and so sweet and so cute)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "10 years after the end of The King's Men, Andrew and Neil have decided to foster a kid. They have low expectations for themselves--they're not exactly ideal parenting material--but at the very least, the kid will be safe with them. But neither Andrew nor Neil do temporary very well.

Full disclosure: highly character-driven, minimally plot-driven."

(Wangxian and MDZS IS my newest hyperfixation and I love the juniors dynamics fics so much lol)

The One-Body Problem by metisket

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "The good news is that Lan Jingyi has found a mentor, friend, and constant companion through the difficulties in life.

The bad news is that that’s because he’s been accidentally possessed by the Yiling Patriarch."

Operation Old Men by Chiharu

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "An ill-fated parent teacher conference reunites Jin Ling's wayward uncle with Sizhui's father. AKA: A matchmaking disaster as told by Jin Ling, Sizhui, and Jingyi."

And Time Is But A Paper Moon by Sami

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: ""Zewu-Jun. You once told me about a house surrounded by gentians, where you visited once a month, and how Lan Zhan still waited there, even when the door no longer opened."

Xichen feels light-headed. He feels shocked, and angry. He has never told anyone such a thing, but Lan Zhan is giving Xichen a look of utter betrayal.

"You told him?" Lan Zhan whispers. "When?"

Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand. "About twenty years from now."

*******

Wei Wuxian starts again from the beginning."

(the first time) he kissed a boy by buzzcut__season

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Langa x Reki

Summary: "Reki is insecure about his lack of kissing experience. Langa just wants to help him feel like he's good enough, even if teaching Reki to kiss means breaking his own heart."

The Gambler by MooeyDooey

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Joe x Cherry

Summary: "Joe and Cherry run into a problem. Conspiracy theories have started to surface in some fan forums of "S" that the two of them are secretly dating one another.

Both of them agree that the idea is absurd, but can't agree on which one of them would be the better boyfriend if they actually were dating. So they decide to have a competition, to see who can be the better romantic partner when pitted up against one another."

The One Where Nico Has 30 Boyfriends by a_million_stars

Fandom: PJO

Ship: Will x Nico

Summary: "“Seriously? Me and Lester?” Nico looked ready to kill him. “If you keep speaking to me I think I’m going to throw up.”

Or, a new friend from college desperately tries to figure out who Nico's secret boyfriend is. He messes up. A lot. If only Nico didn't have so many weirdly close friends from high school."

Burgundy (not Maroon) by Eggplant_Crusader

Fandom: Wednesday

Ship: Wednesday x Enid

Summary: "They're driving each other insane. It can't last. One of these days, one of them will surely kill the other. Enid wants to avoid that. Wednesday can't wait."

Like Everything Glows by Annie_Vi

(One of the only people I'll read RPS fics from. Everything this woman writes is gold, this is my favorite though, and the first i read of hers)

Fandom: BTS

Ship: Jimin x Jungkook

Summary: "Jeon Jeongguk watches the sun rise and set on the water every day without wondering what may lie far beneath the surface. One nighttime walk along the beach upheaves his entire life, sending his human morals into a tailspin as he questions what his beliefs really are."

(I need more shows with good wlw ships that have good fics too!! If anyone has any good recs, send them my way!! Also there are so many good fics I've read that i realized i never bookmarked and now i cant remember what they are. Lesson learned. Bookmark everything! Thanks for the ask!!)

[dravid-writes]

"Hey, I'm back."

My roommate gives a grunt of acknowledgment, not looking up from his phone.

"And I've got some exciting news! Remember that witch I was looking for?"

"No."

"I finally know where to find her! Oh, but you do NOT want to know where. You'd die of cringe just hearing about it."

"You're going to a comic con?"

"Hey, Comic Con is based! Anyway, I'm leaving later tonight, so make sure you lock up when you go to bed."

"Actually," my roommate stands up, "I'm leaving right now, so YOU make sure to lock up."

"Really? You were just sitting on your butt scrolling through twitter a second ago."

"Yeah, but now you're here, so I think I'll leave early."

"Where are you even going?"

"A furry convention."

"Haha, okay, have fun at whatever-it-is then."

Later that night, I've finally arrived at the cringiest place in the city: Kitty Corner. It's hidden away in a part of the city that was abandoned like a decade ago. Something about high levels of ambient magic causing problems. Sketchy as hell, though; there's no one here, and apparently the entrance is down this dark alley? Makes me think it's all an elaborate setup for a mugging.

I walk down the alley, and at the end of it is a curtain with a cutsey sign above labeled "Kitty Corner <3" with pawprints and pastel colors. At least I'm in the right place. This is gonna be so awkward. I take a deep breath, gather my courage, and pull away the curtain to peek though at... another curtain. I pull that one away, and there's yet another curtain. I walk forward, pushing through the layers of curtains, until in the darkness I feel the curtains end. I push through the last one-

And I stumble forward on unfamiliar legs, falling down. Blinking away the sudden brightness, I look down at myself, and I find exactly what I feared: I've been turned into a cat.

"Hey, are you okay?" someone asks.

I look around and find myself in a brightly-lit street, with lots of cats around. LED lights color the town, and little cardboard and wooden stands and structures are where most of the cats are gathered. Instinctively, I look around for who spoke, before realizing it was the cat right in front of me. "U-uh, yeah-" Oh jeez my voice is all high-pitched now. "I'm okay."

"Oh, good." The cat's worried face turns to a friendly smile. "So, meow's it going, stranger?" Oh god I've been here for 10 seconds and I'm already taking psychic damage. "Are you new here? You seem a bit wobbly on your paws."

As I try to stand, I find that yes, I am in fact quite wobbly. I hope I can get back to my human legs ASAP. "I-I'm just here to meet someone, I won't be staying long."

"Ah, just dipping your paws into the water then. Where are you meeting this cat? I'm quite expurrienced here, so I can lend you a helping paw if you'd like!"

Why does he have to talk in cat puns?! Or is that a girl? I'm so out of my element, and I'd REALLY like to not have anyone seeing me like this. "Uh, I don't actually know where she is. I'll just look around on my own." I start to walk away on my wobbly cat legs, but then my stomach growls loud. I forgot to get dinner before I left...

"... Do you at least want me to show you to the food stalls?"

I'm about to say 'no, I'll find them myself', but then I notice a few cats at a stall eating kibble out of a bowl, and I am immediately afraid of where I might wander without guidance. "... Are there any stalls that serve normal food?"

"Of course! Tail me."

"What?"

"You know, tail, as in follow."

"Oh god you're reaching so far for these puns..."

"You mean these PAWns~?"

I groan and follow them to the food stalls, where there's actually a lot of options for normal, human food. I pick out a place that looks like a cat-themed McDonald's, and we wait in line for some fast food. Looking around, everything is cat-sized, and some stuff looks custom-made to account for the different anatomy and lack of opposable thumbs. It's actually pretty impressive. I wonder how this all got built. Like did they build it in here, as cats, or did they bring it from outside..?

It's our turn to order, and I start scanning the menu. I'm about to ask for a cheeseburger, until I see that the cheeseburger is called the 'I Can Has Cheezburger?' "I'll have a hamburger."

"I'll have some meowzzarella sticks and a paw-psi with ice. Oh, and a purrito to go."

We sit down at a cat-sized table and wait for our food. "... So, um, I don't think I ever got your name?"

"Whitesocks," the cat grins.

Ah, right, forgot about the whole anonymity thing. "But your feet aren't even white?"

"Haha, yeah, it's a funny story. Your cat appearance doesn't stay the same every time you leave and come back, so the name I picked on my first visit is pretty silly now. Even if I knew, I was planning on picking a different name every time, so no one would recognize me. I wasn't even sure if I'd come back. But now I have friends here! This is such a fun place. It's purrfect..."

I shake my head. "Cringe as hell is what it is."

The cat- Sorry, 'Whitesocks' frowns. "... You're not allowed to say that here."

"What? Come on, this place can't be so childish that swearing isn't allowed."

"What? No, you can swear as much as you damn well please. But you aren't allowed to insult people for what they enjoy."

"... Wait, you mean I can't say cringe?"

"Right. This is a place where you can't be judged for acting like a silly kitty! It's a place where you don't have to feel ashamed or embarrassed. You don't have to keep up appearances, or act the way you're supposed to. You're free to just... play. To smile and laugh and be as silly as you want! So basically, never say that again or I'm calling security on you."

"Whoa. You're pretty serious about being silly around here."

"We sure are!"

Right on time, our food arrives. I'm eager to dig in, but try as I might, my useless cat paws can't pick up the burger properly. I try my best to get a grip on it, but my paws always slip and I end up just holding the top bun. How am I supposed to eat?!

"Um... It's a lot easier to eat if you just... You know..." Whitesocks leans down and bites a mozzarella stick off their plate.

"... Really?"

"Yeah."

I stare down at the burger on my plate, and sigh; I really have no choice do I? I lean down and just... bite into the burger. Like an animal.

It's pretty good.

I use my paws to hold it in place, and keep biting. Just really ripping it apart with my teeth. I feel like a predator tearing into my prey, except my prey comes with ketchup, lettuce, and tomato. For being made by a cat, this is a really good burger. Be a lot better if it were a cheeseburger though. If only they didn't give it such a stupid name... No, if only I hadn't be scared of the stupid name! I could've just ordered the damn cheeseburger, but no, I was too scared. Meanwhile Whitesocks ordered a whole Cringe Meal without even flinching! Why can't I be brave like them?

Too soon, my burger is gone. But at least my stomach isn't growling at me anymore. Whitesocks and I leave, walking down the streets. "... Hey uh, Whitesocks? I'm sorry for what I said earlier. This place is actually really cool. Weird, but cool. I can tell it's got a lot of heart put into it. So, sorry for making fun of it."

"Aw, it's fine, no purries!"

"I take it back, I take it all back."

Whitesocks giggles. "Don't worry, if groaning at puns was banned then no one would stick around long enough to get used to them. But fur real, apology accepted. I wasn't sure about this place either when I first came here. It's definitely weird, and that takes some getting used to."

"Yeah. It's honestly amazing how you all can do this. Takes more courage than I have, that's for sure."

"Thanks. But being silly here is easy. It's the people who can fight their embarrassment out in the real world that are really brave... Oh yeah, who were you looking for again? I might be able to help you find them!"

"Oh, well, I don't know her name, but I'm looking for a witch?"

Whitesocks blinks. "Oh. Uh. I see."

"What? Do you know her?"

"No, no, I just. I didn't know there were any witches here."

"... Is that... against the rules, or-"

"No, never mind, forget it, I. Good luck, I'll be at the climbing tower if you need me." And with that, Whitesocks walks away.

Well, that was weirder than usual.

I rub my eyes as I walk down the hall. Last night had mixed results: I found the witch, but stayed up WAY too late in the process. I stumble into the kitchen, where my roommate is eating a burrito. "g'mornin," I mumble.

"Morning."

I fish around in the fridge for something to eat...

"So, meow'd it go?"

I spin around to stare at my roommate. "What?!"

He doesn't look up from his burrito. "With the witch. How'd it go?"

"... Good..."

[aprillawliet]

This is really disheartening and pathetic to see

I did what I thought was right and showed the nasty things that were being said and even sent in an ask showing my support

I'll try my best to address what this pretend detectives is trying to saying is fake.

None of the posts shown in the screenshot can be found on twitter - Explanation: Unless you're in their twitter circle and on their locked account I don't think you can search up these posts just by a few words

The reply counters don't match the number of replies shown in the screenshot - Explanation: I did not screenshot all of the replies on that post because some were just emojis and some were on private accounts that I cannot see. For me at least the stats dont change if I dont refresh.

The stats information in the parent post is not present - Explanation- Because I screenshoted just the words and wasn't worrying about the reply, comment or stat buttons on the bar below? That screenshot isn't a single screenshot, its multiple of them. The person who posted those is notorious for posting things and then deleting them so I screenshoted what I did . not really paying attention to if I had the bar underneath the post with the buttons on it showing.

"The person who sent the ask has only ever posted on day the ask was sent, and none of their posts have any relation to death note. it looks like they may have made the account to send this ask". Explanation: Good. the fact you cant find my actual account is the whole purpose. Because this isn't my actual Death Note account. My one has people who hate on other ships on it and if you like something they dont they will tear you apart in their private twitter and discord. so I play it safe on my actual account so I dont get any bad attention. I wanted to post anon but the option doesn't allow me if I have photos in it. So I had to make an entirely different account and send the ask there but also made my account with a lawlight ship pfp so people would at least know I wasn't one of *them*.

It really is disheartening to see me being attacked because people tore apart a couple of screenshots I had taken quickly when I thought I was doing the right thing. I have learned my lesson and truly won't involve myself by showing what's being said behind your backs or showing my support in the future. I have learned my lesson.

best of luck on the last day of dnkintober/gen

hi! i just wanted to send a note about the recent ask about the negative posts on twitter. there are a few suspicious things about it: - the twitter post looks like it might be faked. the reply counters don't match the number of replies shown in the screenshot. the stats information in the parent post is also not present - none of the posts shown in the screenshot can be found on twitter - the person who sent the ask has only ever posted on day the ask was sent, and none of their posts have any relation to death note. it looks like they may have made the account to send this ask it might be legitimate, but it looks like it might be someone purposefully sending either complete fabrication or bait.

so basically what i’m hearing is that you’re the (three) best detective(s) in the world. i have not used twitter in sooo long so thank you for catching this and sharing! i have no clue why someone would do this and it’s fucking weird of them tbh

anyway besties let’s enjoy the rest of this joyous event!!! tomorrow is the last official day (although submissions will be accepted until nov. 5th) and also L’s birthday and Also halloween!!! stay safe out there, you kinky fucks 🎃💀🍫😈🍭👻

[turianmailman]

Hey I just wanted to tell you that I’m really uncomfortable with the fact you draw nsfw of duck and fakir, I really wish you wouldn’t cause even though their aged up in the drawings it’s still very icky to think to draw nsfw of those characters when they are minors in the show :( I don’t want to unfollow because your honestly such a huge inspiration to me as an artist so I just hope you’ll take this into consideration

Some things to consider:

It is perfectly understandable, and 100% okay, to be uncomfortable, with ANYTHING I create. How you feel about my art is valid and you should only ever follow me if you are comfortable interacting with what you see on this blog.

To follow up on number 1, I have no problems with you unfollowing my account for ANY reason. This is the internet. You set your boundaries. I would never want you to compromise your personal safety over my blog.

NSFW art will ONLY ever be shared on this account as a link to a locked twitter account that is NOT safe for minors. If the age of an account is not shared, I will assume you are a minor and block you. Any images shared are cropped and safe to share on this blog. I will also always tag these pieces with NSFT (Not Safe For Tumblr) so you can block the tags on these posts and avoid them.

It is also perfectly understandable, and 100% okay, for me to post whatever content I like about whatever I am interested in, regardless of how that makes YOU feel. Number 1 and number 4 CAN and DO coexist and both have validity.

Yes, they are minors in the show. No, the pieces I make are NOT of them during the canon timeline of the show.

"Aging up" a character happens in real life - its called "aging", alternatively, "time passing" which happens, to all of us, regardless of our current age. This is also a show about talking animals. We don't HAVE to obey reality and law, but I choose to in this context.

That out of the way, some personal thoughts:

The way I engage with these two characters, in particular, is very, very personal. I often inject what I did not get (a loving relationship with someone I can trust, the freedom to explore the relationship both romantically and sexually and be safe, fundamental milestones and experiences for first-time relationships) into their dynamics because that's how art works. We put ourselves into everything, stories do not happen in a vacuum. As a queer writer with a difficult-to-admit, traumatic experience with sexuality and romance, I think it would be incredibly cruel to ban both myself, and artists like me, from exploring what was denied us through characters that make us feel safe. Not to mention, for me at least, the media we consume grows WITH us. I was a minor when the show aired, and when I consumed it. They were minors with me. Now, they are consenting adults with me.

I do not share this with you, or anyone else, for pity reasons, but for context. I take character exploration very seriously, and try to help characters grow while honoring where they came from in canon. But even if I didn't, that would not stop me, nor anyone else, from having access to a basic right as an artist.

Tl;Dr -- I want you to feel safe, and I will install measures to make things that make you feel unsafe as optional as possible, above hiding what makes me feel safe. If that results in an unfollow, please honor both our boundaries.

EDIT: I will not answer any more asks expanding on this topic, as I think it’s redundant and I’m not interested in discussing the topic further - I appreciate your thoughts and concerns regardless ���🏻

[orchidbark]

I'm having pretty mixed feelings about tumblr's new content filtering. The short of it is, while I think it's good for tumblr its showed me I need to expand my horizons/places i post (the long of it is contained below lol)

so while i am looking forward to tumblr finally clawing its way back out of the stoneage with the way we can post content, and i know that content filtering is a major step towards that, it really chufts my fluffs that by tagging things as mature, im now getting less eyes on it.

i mean that's the system working as intended and I don't exactly want folks having to look at mature art when they don't want to. but since the content filtering is an optional switch you have to flick yourself, this means that people who might enjoy this stuff normally just don't see it because it's all off by default. which is annoying and discouraging to say the least (this isn't a finger point at any followers - you didn't design the system! just making sure thats clear so no one thinks I'm trying to boo hoo guilt them because they didnt see my arts or whatnot)

so while tumblr is my favorite site to post and is still kinda my home in a lot of ways (i've been here over a decade in one account or another), im gonna start trying to focus on other sites as well. i opened a furaffinty account so I can unleash a little more over there, and I guess i should update my neglected twitter... i would like to post more on twitter anyway and have been meaning to, but twice in the first year i was trying to establish myself, it got locked for "suspicious activity" (I posted two things in the same day) which really ground my ambitions into powder.

But to keep up with crossposting i got postybirb. ive never used it before though but we'll see how it goes! if the bird site locks me out again ill just turn into a giant slime and eat northamerica (i promise)

that all said, i'm not leaving tumblr or anything so dramatic. but since my primary audience is based on a webedsite that can just chunk off my audience overnight for following the rules, I don't want to keep putting all my eggs in one basket.

[h7jfangirl]

TGS chapter 12's cover!

And how I said before, Hyde appears!

First of all: I really love the colors of this cover, the black and gold convination is fantastic and you can feel how Hyde is suffering while nobody is doing nothing to help him.

Now, let's start from the description of this page

When I read this for the first time I didn't catch it, I though they were literally saying that although Hyde was shown in agony on the cover, the chapter was going to be calmer than it seemed

So at first I was like:

But then I read the comments and I understood that Sabrina was being sarcastic (JAJAJSJ).

So, analyzing Sabrina's words we can realize that it reveals a little about what the chapter was mainly about:

The chapter will be about Hyde suffering the concequences of his actions while Jekyll decides to confront Laynon with his feelings, something that could affect Hyde in a worse or better way (Knowing that Hyde usually use Henry's negative emotions to escape from a emotional problem. But Edward could be inside of a deep part of Jekyll's mind where the negative emotions that Henry can feel are even more stronger and dangerous than before, so Hyde would be in a lot of trouble with the same things he once use for his own benefit.

Now let's analyze the cover image:

"The image is of Hyde being taken over by dark forces on top of a stage while many upper-class viewers watch it as a fantastic spectacle"

This is clearly symbolic, I don't think real magic dark tentacles grab Hyde on a stage and the viewers think it's part of the show LMAO. BUT what are exactily thoses dark forces?

Maybe they are the actual representation of Hyde's OWN INSECURITIES, due to everything he went through in chapter 10 Hyde's ego was very damaged and from that new insecurities were formed about himself, being such doubts as "Will I be free" or even existential questions like "Who I am?" That tun into these powerful dark forces that have manifested for drag him into the darkest part of the mind, where he belongs

For one night, he will face and feel all the fear and stress Jekyll felt cause of him, while outside of his mind the exhibition begins and Henry faces one of his own fears...

I think about the possibility that the chapter takes place on the night of the big exhibition, because in the small spoilers of Sabrina on Twitter Henry and Laynon are seen with elegant clothes. However, there is also the great possibility that it could be a Jekyll or Laynon flashback where we are shown that we still did not see EVERYTHING in the last chapter, i think so because we only see them in those suits. But at least we know that the exhibition is very close.

But then if the spoilers about Henry and Laynon are just a flashback, then the chapter would be about Jekyll remembering the little confrontation he had with Robert while Hyde suffers in the depths of his mind and he doesn't realize? Or maybe...

EVIL JEKYLL???

Nah, I don't think so but it would be super hyper mega cool. Henry being able to somehow control the shadows so they will take Hyde inside his mind and lock him in the deepest, even if it was for just one night (Surely because the poor guy just wants to sleep). It would make sense if we take into account that he will be able to empower himself with Frankenstein (According to Sabri's wip on Twitter)

So why not with Hyde too? He actually did it in the last panel of chapter 10!.

Well, whatever what will happend in this chapter, we don't have to wait to long, because nexts uptade comes next week!

So~ I'm ending the post here, thanks for take the time to read this. I'm so sorry about my bad english, i had to use Google translator for this but I hope you liked it!

I Will love to see your theorys and thoughs about this chapter in the comments!

So yeah, goodbye and have a nice day! 💕✨

[poof346]

Sonic Frontiers: Opening the Zones

Back on my Twitter account, I posted a Twitlonger review of Sonic Frontiers after beating it for the first time. Since I'm transitioning to posting my reviews here, I wanted a review of the game on this account but also didn't want to just copy and paste it. So, here's a different idea I came up with: reviewing the individual islands. I'll be evaluating the exploration, platforming, story content, minibosses and Titan battles. Spoilers will of course be expected. So, let's begin with the first, Kronos.

Being the beginning of the game, Kronos Island naturally serves an important function of teaching the player everything they need to know about the gameplay before opening up. You play Cyberspace levels for vault keys, solve a puzzle to open up the map, fight smallfry enemies and minibosses, and use skill points to unlock the Cyloop. Surprisingly, didn't find the tutorial annoying on my second go, it was over pretty quickly.

Once you're properly in the action, I'd say this is a pretty solid first island. The platforming in the open zone starts simple to get you comfortable with obtaining collectibles from the challenges, the starting minibosses are fun and manageable (yes, even Squid, I like it despite the memes). Amy's story is also enjoyable, demonstrating a more emotionally mature take on her character that wants to spread love to everyone. Honestly, the only disappointment at this point would be the Cyberspace levels, all of the layouts here are reused and don't feel as fun as their source games.

As the first Titan battle, BOY Giganto fits that role perfectly. This ain't your daddy's Super Sonic boss fight, the degree of spectacle present is way above what you'd see in previous titles. And while not demanding much from the player in terms of combat, I don't necessarily think it needs to be hard, it's very fun. Oh yeah, and it has THE BEST VOCAL TRACK IN ANY SONIC GAME, DON'T @ ME. Undefeatable is incredible, not just because I'm stunned they got Kellin Quinn from Sleeping with Sirens for a Sonic game, it kicks so much ass and sets a perfect mood for the fight.

Overall, Kronos Island is pretty good! With how many games usually have a slow start, this one lays the foundation without showing their whole hand too early. But with that foundation established, we move into Ares.

Ares Island is a very natural follow-up from Kronos, upping the ante with platforming, exploration, and combat. The terrain is more varied too, with tons of rocky canyons, mountains and an oasis. Enemies have some more fun solutions as well, my favorites being the spring you stomp after letting it fling you and the flying saucer thing you chase with its light trail. However, I do think the parasol enemy should've been reworked, at least make it so the camera doesn't hard lock towards it automatically.

The Cyberspace levels are still fairly whatever here, but the real star of the show is Knuckles. His story is great, and more than makes up for how recent games had been portraying him by just...getting everything right. He decides to lead an army of Koco in preparing the desert for war, feeling a kinship from his tribe. But when he discovers like his own tribe, they had already been wiped out long ago, the loneliness of being the last echidna sets in again, and Sonic cheers him up in an earnest conversation, gaining the resolve to live for himself and not just the memories of his people. This is GOOD.

Keeping in the theme of quality on the rise, Wyvern is a little tougher and better than the Giganto fight in pretty much every way. Flying on rails, you can use Super Sonic's parry to deflect missiles back at it for another counter opportunity, giving a SICK specialized animation where he throws Wyvern into a mountain and crumbles the whole thing. In general, more is asked of you in terms of fighting skill and the spectacle is better. The battle theme is a banger too, though I do have my preference for Undefeatable.

Ares Island, as a whole, greatly capitalizes on the potential of this open zone style and is a blast to run through. Let's see if the next one keeps the streak with Chaos.

Chaos Island is where the main story starts gearing towards its climax, with Sonic showing signs of fatigue from his quest to save his friends. The aesthetic fits this well, being a volcanic archipelago with lava and more platforming. Some would say...too much of it. Specifically the 2D, the game doesn't make it quite clear which sections are mandatory for progression so the place can be confusing to navigate in a way I felt the previous two weren't. Combat is about on par with previous, introducing a cool new enemy, a metal bird you can hitch a ride on after stunning it.

While the gameplay hasn't taken as big of a leap forward there, the Cyberspace stages are...starting to look up? Still not a highlight, but they're becoming less annoying at least. Speaking of less annoying, HALLELUJA THEY DID IT, TAILS IS A CHARACTER AGAIN! This one is my favorite character story in the game, as Ian Flynn masterfully demonstrated his skills in recontextualizing previous material. Like many others, I was disappointed in how the newer games were seemingly stripping Tails of his heroic edge, magnetized at Sonic's side. The method of course correction is clever in how simple, yet effective it is: Tails is still a kid, so he's not ready to be fully independent. It's okay for him to need help sometimes. Very happy with this direction.

Since I saw a lot of people talk about it on Twitter, figure I'll say: the pinball minigame was not that bad, you guys are just impatient. Was it perfect? No, but I really didn't run into that many issues with it on both of my playthroughs. Anyway, Titan battle with Knight. Another good one! Features the game's most interesting use of Sonic's parry in the desperation phase, having to angle it to throw the dude's shield back at em, as well as having another cool cinematic counter (evidently based on the movie). Find Your Flame is also a sick battle theme, seeing the return of Tyler Smyth on vocals after Forces.

Chaos Island is still fun, but doesn't quite reach the heights of the last two areas in my opinion. The next one is...less traditional, and you'll see why, if you don't know already.

Rhea Island is probably the way it is due to time constraints, originally a chunk from Kronos Island SIGNIFICANTLY pulled back in scope to house 6 different towers as linear platforming challenges. Reaching the peak of each tower also delivers lore cutscenes about the Ancients, showing them as beings from another planet who brought the Chaos Emeralds to Earth after the Master Emerald pulled their ships in. Because of this structure, Rhea is over much faster than usual and doesn't have any exploration or bosses to speak of, so I'll mostly be rating the platforming.

It's good stuff, mainly highlights how I don't think the game NEEDED Cyberspace levels, the original platforming ends up being more fun to me. Cause y'know, they can build the layouts with this Sonic's handling in mind. Once you clear the final tower, the blue boy becomes a cyber vegetable for like, a minute in what I consider the narrative's biggest missed opportunity. With how much the character stories were building up his friends doing their own thing, I thought playing as them would make a fun gimmick for the final island. But they join hands and enter Sonic's heart to bring him back to normal. Hopefully they're fun in the announced update.

Rhea doesn't exactly fit neatly with the other areas but I think I like it for what it is? A short gauntlet of self-contained platforming stages? For better or worse, I'm less conflicted on the final island, Ouranos.

Getting straight to the point, Ouranos Island is super underwhelming as a final area and feels like a gameplay stopgap after the team didn't want to end on Rhea. So they took ANOTHER part from Kronos Island for a more traditional open zone. It just feels stale in terms of content, with all the minibosses being hard mode recolors of previous ones, the environment and memory tokens being copied, and the difficulty being a noticeable step back from Chaos in terms of platforming.

Not really helped by the fact that nearly all the cutscenes are optional and seeking them out has the game spell out the lore from Rhea Island in case you didn't get it. Paradoxically, though, this was where I actually started liking the Cyberspace levels? They saved pretty much all the good layouts for this area, and I ended up looking forward to playing them for once. So maybe the idea could still work? I dunno, this island is a mixed bag. Eventually, I made my only visit to Big of this playthrough and splurged on collectibles because I was checked out.

Unfortunately, even the Titan battle, Supreme, is a big letdown. Weak spectacle, not very creative battle gimmick, and if you come in with a high attack stat, the dude drops like a fly. I'm Here is a great song but not a great boss theme if you get me? Like, I don't think it matches well and kinda wish Vandalize played here instead. The worst part is playing on Normal or Easy difficulty has the game skip what I consider the more satisfying final boss, The End. The gameplay changes to an Ikaruga-inspired shoot-em-up but I think it's more engaging, the music actually fits, and the monologue adds some menace.

I definitely see why this isn't a popular take. The hacking minigames at least try to prime you for the fight beforehand but it's still a massive departure from other boss fights. Also quite a bit more difficult than the Titans, I can see people less versed in the genre struggling a lot here. But me personally, I welcomed the challenge and enjoyed The End thematically. With the Ancients being hyped as this culture with great significance lost to time, it makes sense for the final threat to represent their metaphorical and literal death, having driven possibly hundreds or thousands of other civilizations into obscurity. Plus the boss theme is a nice mix of somber and triumphant, great stuff.

Ouranos, despite featuring a cool true final boss, is pretty weak as a finale and a sign that some parts of Frontiers still had to be rushed.

As a whole, I think the islands reach a good bar of quality and make a case for why Sonic should strive forward with this new direction for the series. Not all hits, but I've come to expect at least some imperfections when it comes to this blue bastard. If anything, I see it as worth celebrating that they got so much right on a first go, means they won't have to modify this formula too much in the next game and can focus on higher quality.

[smolstarthief]

Persona 5/Persona 5 Strikers: Pro-Police or Anti-Police?

Hoo boy... So this honestly has been a LONG time coming on my end because I have seen so much of that debate on social media (Twitter namely) and I can see the points of BOTH sides but there have been moments where it just got out of hand... Especially whenever people tried to put in a more grey/nuanced take only to be slammed and taken out of context. Even repeatedly mentioning the interrogation at the beginning of P5 which, I will admit has gotten tiresome. At least for me, I do still feel for Joker and I wished the game acknowledged his trauma more but there's a thing called, "beating a dead horse" and this is one along with "Haru says ACAB" in Strikers (which was done THREE TIMES in the same arc and it got annoying fast, like shut up already! We get it!). So, let's dive in a little bit:

MAJOR SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!!!

Persona 5/Persona 5 Royal

Now let me just say I know! Police in Japan are just as bad if not worse than the West and I STILL hate the idea of Makoto wanting to become a cop for such naive reasons (especially with what happened to Sae, her own sister!)... But there are at least some of form of nuances sometimes and by that I mean, I can see what they were trying to do? I do agree that P5/P5S backpedaled SEVERELY by deciding to sweep issues under the rug after addressing them and not continuing from such. In fact I feel like it could have been a hell of a lot better. But P5 did something different compared to previous games and addresses the issues DIRECTLY right at the beginning of said game! It was tense and horrifying, but needed. Of course... They then sweep it under the rug and act like nothing traumatic happened to our protag which is NOT a good look at all and I'm still pissed off about it. In the main game's case, it's portrayed as more black and white with only a SMALL amount of nuance like that cop that was trying to help Futaba when she went out by herself and got lost (which people ignore entirely by the way). So I CAN see where people got the "anti-police" message from... But that's only the tip of the iceberg as it's ACTUALLY more about Systematic Corruption, not exactly or JUST police corruption. Namely in politics with Shido and the Conspiracy (which is apparently still somewhat around in Strikers until Owada's downfall) controlling everything all the way to law enforcement. The force had been basically under his payroll (including the corrupt SIU Director before his death) whether by force or not (mostly not in this case though). Now honestly, the police depicted there are undoubtedly rotten to the core save for a VERY SMALL handful (the cop that was trying to help Futaba which, again, gets ignored by several). Look at the interrogators who ruthlessly beat and drug a minor without any second thought or remorse for example. But again, the black and white narrative the game kept unwittingly doing ended up being to its detriment in a way. I'm not defending those assholes AT ALL! They deserved every punishment given to them! But for a game that goes on about grey morality... It doesn't quite deliver on that. Still though, it does emphasize that it's more of the fault of the whole corrupt system, not just one part of it. There needs to be change and reform which is what our MCs were trying to do in a way (more like inspiring change but still). In the end, it's all about the following:

Corruption and abuse of power.

Again the police depicted in this game were incompetent at best, corrupt at worse with very few silver linings. But it's not just them but rather the one person responsible for the whole mess. Who had them under his payroll? Who controlled them and by extension all of Tokyo? Who was willing to dispose of anyone who "outlives their usefulness" or is perceived as a threat to what he wants (including his own family)?

SHIDO AND BY EXTENSION THE CONSPIRACY

Bottom line: They are definitely a problem but it's not just them.

"But, Joker and his trauma?"

I definitely understand that and still do. I fully believe he has and still has trauma with the police. Easy! But... I do feel like people go too far with it sometimes. It's hard to explain but there have been moments where people either use it as a justification/argument against someone trying to provide a more nuanced view of things or... Dare I say, depict him like a "uwu soft traumatized boi." Like I said, it's hard to explain on my end so feel free to ignore it. Everyone deals with trauma differently so there is STRONG chance that I'm overanalyzing it. I just remember moments where I just feel a little, I guess annoyed? I'm not sure exactly but final thing: I understand what he went through and I can't imagine how long it would take to recover but I hope he DOES overcome it.

"Sae? Akechi?"

Yep, even though their jobs are different, they are by and large members of law enforcement no matter how you spin it. Both were broken in a way. Akechi is pretty easy to explain with how Shido negatively impacted his life but not much about Sae, who dealt with sexism/misogyny at her workplace along with the trauma of her father's (also a cop) death. She no doubt had some idealism only to be hit with the fact that she's gonna have to use underhanded/downright illegal tactics to get by and even rise up the ranks. She, therefore ended up (well, nearly) corrupted herself before coming to her senses. That's honestly one of the BIGGEST REASONS why I felt like Makoto joining the force to become a police commissioner isn't a good, even a downright naïve, idea. I honestly would have been somewhat fine with it if it weren't for that fact among other things. Regardless of her willpower, it will go south fast.

Now... Onto Strikers!

Persona 5 Strikers

Since the game came out and I started playing it, I still feel like the system is still beyond saving, especially when attempting to do it from the inside. But I don't mind the added nuances that P5 didn't do much of. It's still continuing the critiques, just shows more of what does happen within said system and even has an ACTUAL officer (Zenkichi) say, "Yeah, my job sucks, everyone's corrupt, there are much better ways to do things and make a change but not this. I'm only staying because I have a daughter to take care of and it's all I know. I'm no different from them." Was it all handled well? I wouldn't say "yes" (Joker's trauma is BARELY addressed at all of course) but a little better than what P5's narrative did which only addressed the issues but not exactly follow up on them. Now to be fair... In the system, regardless of where you live, any one within it who remotely tries to do something or speak against it either lose their jobs or even go "missing" irl. Those have happened and it's more proof that yeah, it's rotten to the core. There's no denying it but regardless, that's NOT what the game is about at all. At least that's what I feel about it as it's only PART of the narrative. I think Zenkichi puts it best here:

Speaking of Zenkichi... Oh boy... Now I definitely understand some of the criticisms with him but honestly, he was the best written (PT) character I've ever encountered! He was honestly the perfect representation of those that genuinely want to help and do good, only to be held back by an extremely harsh reality. It was already hinted at with Sae but here? It 100 percent confirms just how harsh and even cutthroat it can be if it could break someone's idealism so badly. Even Kaburagi of all people thinks the same thing Zenkichi said:

Then there's his past and it's a tragic one! But let's look more at the decisions he ended up making:

While it was no doubt done to protect his daughter, he ended making a selfish decision along with a selfless one (which was brilliant!) with not only allowing the cover up of his wife's death and denying justice for her, but also ruining an innocent person and their family's lives.

It's horrible, but also... There's a grey area/nuance as with the rest of his character. It was both understandable, but also wrong as he, as Akane's Shadow puts it:

He sacrificed his values, his morals, all for the sake of having a peace of mind. Speaking of Akane, she's also an interesting case in a way that she more or less perfectly represents the more "black and white" views on justice in general. Namely the more toxic/biased kind. Her reasons are also understandable but she was also acting selfishly by only focusing on how SHE was effected by Aoi's death and not even considering those that were also grieving her death and/or that people grieve/handle grief differently than her. But back on topic.

Her own views and beliefs that law enforcement basically SHOULD be dismantled (mostly out of said childish bias and black & white views) and it's framed as WRONG and it's very much correct on that. Chaos and order are two sides of the same coin, one can't exist without the other. When I say ACAB, I'm calling for reform, defund, have the corrupt held accountable for EVERYTHING and even face jail time for their crimes! Defund the police, have the ones that arrest, harm, and even murder out of bias (race, gender, etc.), lose their badges/jobs and locked up, make improvements! It's saying that there IS still corruption out there and there's no denying it. But fully eliminating the law in general will just lead to more problems. Now granted, she's young and clearly doesn't fully understand why those views are ultimately wrong but still... It was a very interesting subject to tackle and I feel like they handled it well.

Now back to Zenkichi, he was at first in denial about his decisions ultimately being the wrong ones too and even tries to justify it. Of course, his Shadow said otherwise and that was when he finally admitted that he really did act no different from the criminals he despised. But it also doesn't mean he can't redeem himself and that's what ultimately leads to his new resolve:

That right there along with everything else! There's the nuance! And ultimately despite some hiccups, Strikers handled the grey morality and nuance beautifully! Especially regarding law enforcement! Dare I say, even better than the base game! It continues the critiques with no problem but also showing different sides and areas of it! There is good and evil, but what about in-between? What about the more greyer area? It still says that there IS corruption, sometimes even beyond saving but... Sometimes a small silver lining is hidden somewhere.

Now, the ultimate question:

Is P5 & P5S (namely the latter) Pro-Police or Anti-Police?

Personally, my answer is this: Neither.

Why? What theme do they both have in common?

JUSTICE

Someone puts it best on Twitter that the games are more pro-justice and I fully agree!

P5/P5S gives the idea about following your OWN justice, your OWN moral code and rules, paving your OWN path and not let others dictate it! That's what the MCs ultimately start to learn in both games. Therefore it's pro-justice. Again, do I agree that the system is beyond saving? Yeah. Do I at least acknowledge and understand what the narratives are trying to say and nuances regardless even if I don't agree with some writing decisions (ex: Makoto wanting to become a commissioner despite everything)? Also yes. But at the same time, don't judge a book by its cover for other people (not just law enforcement and politics mind you). Especially some that genuinely DO want to help at best. That there is nuance and greyness, just have to look closely. Some of the MCs are still TERRIBLY written and executed (even annoying) but the message was still somewhat there.

Final Thoughts

Now I fully understand how you all feel of course! I still believe in ACAB and even I agree that maybe I'm one to talk and have a lot more to learn about the world... This is just my own attempt at putting my own two cents in. If you disagree, that's fine! This is just what I've felt should be at least talked about more often. And I tried to phrase it as best as I can without coming off as insensitive or ignorant and if I did, I sincerely apologize for that! I'm not trying to say, come off as a "bootlicker" or any of the sort. I'm just trying show discuss more of the grey areas and nuances that are, more often than not, constantly overlooked. How one interprets both games is ultimately up to them. You, the player. And this is my own interpretation. Simple as that. I hope you all have a good day/afternoon/evening!

[five-hour-anxiety]

CREEPY HAUNTED HOUSE TOUR: DON'T FOLLOW US IN 👻💀👽😦😈 | The Theory of Real-Activity | LOGAN FOUND A BODY YOU GUYS

@zerogettie  @spacevirgil  @tree4life25 @thebiggestnaturaldisaster@pailettehazel @jordandobbertin @thecityofthefireflies @the-fabulous-kimball @azuranightsong @virmillion @erlenmeyertrash @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch  @the-sanders-sides @punch-you-with-friendship @captaincantatrice @clovenpinetree @jughead-is-canonically-aroace @aplaceinthevoid @zennyo

Word Count: 4500

Warnings: panic attacks, arguments, haunted houses, talk of demons

Pairing: platonic analogical

Summary: Logan and Virgil run a vlog together, and have decided to film in a haunted house.

“Virgil, for the last time, ghosts aren’t real.”

“Yes, I know that! You know that! Roman and Patton don’t, though, so we need to go ‘ghost hunting’ to prove it once and for all!”

 “I understand where you are coming from, but do we really need to do this? There must be a better approach to the issue – one that will not cost as much and save us the tour of a condemned building.”

 “Oh, that’s hilarious – you think I want to step foot in there? My anxiety is spiked at the thought of what could go wrong on the way out there, much less once we actually go in.” Virgil sighed and ran his hands down his face. His grape colored bangs fell back into place, and he blew on them in an annoyed manner. “Unfortunately, Roman has access to our Twitter and already made a poll.”

  “You mean to tell me-”

 “Yep. The people want a ghost busting episode.”

 “Why on Earth did I give him the password for the account? What was I thinking?” Logan brought his tie up to his mouth, and Virgil strained to hear the muffled curses over the mouthful of cotton.

“Roman basically just challenged you to a giant game of chicken – a public one, and are you really gonna let him win that easy?”

 “Grammar, Virgil, but you have a point. I cannot let that day-dreaming ditz best me. Clear your weekend schedule, we are going on a… what did you call it? Spirit pursuit?”

 “Okay, first – I have no weekend plans as that would require having more than three friends, and two – it’s a ghost hunt so unless you want me to meme the shit out of you again, never call this a spirit pursuit again.”

 “Oh, please, our audience does not need another joke – it’s bad enough you got everyone and their cousin to call the video blog ‘The Theory of Real-Activity” instead of its official name.”

  “Look, that’s better than ‘VirgeofDiscovery’, and it’s a vlog Logan stop trying to sound smart for once in your life.”

***

“I think that I saw this on Buzzfeed Unsolved, once. Just put the flashlight down and ask… something… to turn it on.”

“You know this won’t work, right?” The camera’s mic picks up Logan, who was exploring another room. “And it’s Buzzfeed, why were you watching that garbage?”

“Because I love Shane Madej, the only perfect human.” The camera swings upward so that we see Virgil’s face, and he points at the lens. “You can all quote me on that – make sure he knows that Virge from The Theory of Real-Activity loves his work.”

“Oh my God, Virgil, are you using our video blog in a sad attempt to get your internet crush to notice you?”

 “I-No! It’s a squish! And stop calling it a video blog!”

“If I were as childish as Patton, I would begin to sing one of those schoolyard chants about you and Mr. Madej sitting in a tree.”

“Well, gee, thanks for-”

“I am going to rap it instead.”

 “LOGAN, I SWEAR TO GOD.”

“Virgil and Shane, sitting in-” The camera stops recording.

***

 “Alright, do we have everything we need? My bag has a portable charger, extra batteries, and some water bottles as well as the camera I plan to use.”

“I have the salt.”

 “Virgil, didn’t we agree that ghosts aren’t real?”

 “Yes, but you can never be too safe. Besides – Patton wouldn’t let me leave without it, so now we have a pound of salt.” Virgil shook it around and shimmied. Logan groaned, and reached for the other’s bag, looking to see if anything else was in there.

 “Oh, I see you have a first aid kit – that’s a good addition. You also have the snacks, flashlights, and a camera but I don’t see your stress ball? Are you sure you wish to go without?”

“No worries, man, I got it in the car.”

“Why is it in your car?”

 “Roman had to drive me to my therapy session, and the chariot-”

 “You mean that disgusting minivan?”

 “Yeah, the chariot. Anyway, I have it in there because Roman was driving.”

Logan frowned at the thought, knowing that the man often bragged about having a lead foot while driving. Virgil just shrugged and hoisted his bag over his shoulder, shaking the salt container as he went out the door.

 “Hey, we both made it to the office in one piece, it’s all good. Moving on, we should probably do the intro before we leave the house. Get at least one shot with decent lighting.”

“Ah, yes, that is a good idea – do you wish to hold the camera or should I?” Logan locked the door behind him, making sure the spare key hadn’t been moved in case he misplaced his set.

“I’ll film, whenever you try to do anything in selfie mode you trim off half our heads.” Virgil threw his bag in the trunk and moved over to the passenger side door.

 “Why is it whenever we go anywhere in i car you refuse to drive, Virgil?”

 “If you didn’t leave your car at the university this weekend, we would’ve taken yours. And driving makes me anxious.”

 “Then why do you own a car?” It was a question Logan asked frequently, and never got a satisfying answer to.

 “I have a car because I’m too lazy to skateboard everywhere.”

  Logan rolled his eyes, and slipped into the car, taking the keys from the lanky man. He tied his hair back into a ponytail and motioned to Virgil to start filming.

 “Sup everyone, we still need an official video intro so keep sending in ideas. And I’m sure that you read the title, so y’all know we’re going on a ghost hunt today.”

 “Please, Virgil, don’t make it a clickbait title. Please don’t hurt me like that.”

 “I do what I want, nerd.” Logan groaned and started the engine as Virgil continued to talk, only interrupting to correct the brand name and to offer his stance when Virgil asked if he believed in ghosts. Despite his easy tone, though, Virgil seemed tense and his shoulders were drawn up close.

 The drive was by no means a long one, but by the time they finally reached the old house, Virgil had somehow managed to go through his entire playlist, having skipped each song after one or two measures. Logan found it annoying but said nothing, as he could see Virgil gripping his stress ball out of the corner of his eye.

This wouldn’t end well.

***

 “Logan, Logan it turned the flashlight on please, please tell me there’s a logical explanation for that!”

“I don’t know! Maybe it’s a faulty battery, or… or the switch isn’t fully on so it’s flipping between its off and on mode!”

 “OH MY GOD IT’S MOVING!”

 There’s a high-pitched scream, and the sound of footsteps retreating. The recording cuts to Virgil’s camera and shows Logan sprinting away as fast as he can.

 “YOU COWARD, DON’T LEAVE ME HERE! LOGAN!”

***

 “So, this is the place – leave it to Roman to pick a fucking mansion.”

 “Yes, well, I would expect no less from him. The Victorian style is quite breathtaking, despite it’s less than perfect condition.” Logan was leaning against the car, cleaning his glasses. Virgil shifted from foot to foot and fiddled with the straps on his bag.

“Do we really have to go in? We could just tell Roman there was like, a cop here or something, and he of all people should know that trespassing on private property doesn’t end well.”

 “I do not believe breaking and entering the theatre to steal a prince costume is quite the same, Virgil, and Roman would find that story compelling. No, we would have to mention that the officer was angered by our intent to enter a condemned area – we would at least have Patton on our side with that.”

 “Please don’t remind me of how unsafe this is. Not while I’m holding the car keys.”

 “You won’t drive anywhere.”

“At this point, self-preservation would let me do anything.” Virgil sighed and threw the keys at Logan. “Just hold on to these – don’t think you want me driving off without ya.”

 Logan hummed in agreement, pocketing the keys as he walked towards the front door. By the time he reached the porch, he looked back to Virgil who still hadn’t moved. Logan gestured towards the door.

 “Okay! Fine! But if something happens, this is all on you and your ego!”

 “If I recall correctly, you were the one who wanted to come here.”

 “Well, I changed my mind. C’mon, let’s just get this over with. Camera’s rolling.”

***

 “Logan, this isn’t funny!” The camera picks up a breeze from Virgil’s jacket as he sprints in the direction he thinks Logan went, his cries ignored.

The camera shifts suddenly, and we come face to face with the man himself. Virgil had stopped running and is standing in the front room.

“I never thought I’d say this, but I wish I was back in Logan’s basement listening to him rant about Mothman again.” He sighs, putting his free hand behind his head. “I’d rather listen to him confess his undying love for the thing than be here, choking on dust.

 “But! Instead, I let Roman win – which, by saying that, I feel nauseous – and now we’re here running around a death maze. There’s a ton of rusty nails and if we get cut on those we aren’t gonna get to a hospital in time. I think I saw a bat earlier? And where there’s bats, there’s disease-carrying mosquitoes. Not to mention those jacked up stairs.” The camera focuses on a flight of rotted stairs, the floorboards broken and, in some spots, missing altogether.

 “Yeah, stairs aren’t supposed to be bouncy. I’m just-I’m just gonna call Patton and see if he knows what to do from here.”

***

“I think there’s more dust in here than in Aunt Patty’s attic, and that’s saying something.”

 The house was older than anything the two had ever seen, and there was a fine film of filth covering every available surface. Logan couldn’t help but notice the numerous cobwebs and think of Patton – specifically, how much the man would hate being around so many.

  “Hey, do you, uh…” Virgil moved his flashlight over to one of the webs and stuttered out a few more false starts. “Do you think any of the spiders who made those things are, like, poisonous?”

 “If there are any venomous spiders, they will not bite you unless you give them a reason. They cannot eat you, so there is no purpose in wasting their venom on a large creature like you.” This seemed to calm the taller man down, and Logan moved over to the staircase.

 “Hey, don’t go up those, nerd, I already checked them. They’re not safe – the wood’s so rotted it’s squishy and soft.” Logan nodded and made a mental note to locate a different way upstairs.

The two continued to look around for a while longer, not finding anything remotely interesting. After about half an hour of quiet observation, Virgil suggested they started filming, claiming that the sooner they wrapped this up, the sooner they could drive away and never come back.

 “Salutations, class-”

“Logan, you’re boring.”

 “I am talking like I normally do, Virgil, how else should I speak? Like Roman, perhaps?”

 “God, no, please. Anything but that.”

“Well, in that case – greetings one and all! We’ve finally arrived at our grand destination and have been parading around the grounds for a few hours!”

 “I will throw this salt at you.”

 “Little grains of salt are no match for a prin- oof!”

 “I told you I would.”

 “You threw the entire container at me! Like a savage!”

 “What, you can pretend to Roman and I can’t?”

***

“Okay, so calling Patton was a bust. He told me to use the salt like a weapon and I had to tell him I already chucked it at Logan’s face.” Virgil snickers, running a finger under his nose. “That was the best thing to happen today if I’m being honest. Pat didn’t really appreciate it, though.

“Roman was also a wasted call – apparently he’s at some audition and when he answered, well, he just started screaming about newspapers.” Virgil pauses, and we hear something shatter off-screen.

“H-Hello? Demons?” The camera slowly pans across the room, almost making a full circle as even more thumps can be heard. Before it can finish, Virgil screams and drops the camera.

The screen is filled with static.

***

It had been about two hours, and in that time Logan had somehow managed to: find a way upstairs, provoke something into turning that flashlight on, proceed to run upstairs, get lost, and find a new respect for supernatural beliefs.

 “I cannot believe I’m saying this, but I believe in ghosts now.” His words echoed around the attic, unheard by anyone but him and perhaps the mouse he saw earlier. At least, he hoped that’s what it was. He couldn’t stand the thought of sharing space with a rat.

 “I believe in ghosts, so can we stop playing this juvenile game? How on Earth do I get back downstairs?” He waited for an answer as the logical part of his brain scolded him for speaking to thin air.

 He didn’t get one.

“This is ridiculous, I should know better.” He paused and listened again. “If I change my mind and say ghost are not real, will one of you tell me how to get back downstairs?” Logan removed his glasses and began to pace the room. The amount of dirt that had gathered on his frames was astounding – perhaps he had stumbled through a cobweb in his hasty exit.

“Well, what would Patton do in this situation? At present, he may make a joke about his poor eyesight and lack of- ow!” As he spoke, Logan ran into an old china cabinet – it didn’t fall, but he still held his breath as it swayed back and forth.

“Well, that was embarrassing,” Logan whispered, moving to the front to see if anything was inside. He found a few plates and teacups, though none were particularly impressive. If he were Roman or Patton he may have found the painted flowers beautiful, but he wasn’t, and he didn’t. The maroon one rimmed in gold paint did remind him of a set Roman owned, however, and made a mental note to come back for it if there was time.

But first, he had to find his way downstairs and reunite with Virgil.

***

“So, as you may have seen – though I can’t be sure because obviously, I do not know how this will be edited – I was forced to make a hasty, yet calm, retreat from the study.”

The screen cuts to a replay of Logan fleeing the room, and trombones play as he screams. Text pops up and it says “logan lies” in comic sans.

“After my exit, I managed to find my way upstairs and now I am unsure how to get down – much like a cat climbing a tree. But I did stumble across a cabinet full of teacups that I think a friend of mine would enjoy. I have also concluded that there are too many mothballs in this house and I will not cross meeting the Mothman off my bucket list today.”

Logan crosses the room as he paces, chewing on his lip in between sentences. “Despite my own disappointment, I find myself upset the most over being separated from Virgil. I do not believe he is well – I am ashamed to admit that I have only now realized he was suppressing a panic attack as we drove out here.

“To be quite honest, camera, there is a very good chance this footage won’t be posted online. It depends on how Virgil is doing and whether he is okay with releasing footage taken of him during an atta-”

Logan trips and falls into the china cabinet once more, a plate shattering upon impact. The camera swings around to show the floor and a trap door that was slightly ajar. A ladder falls from the floor, designed to be hidden when not in use.

“Well, here is my way down. This ladder does not look up to code,” He steps down on a rung, testing his weight, “but it should hold long enough for me to get down.”  He begins his descent but stops suddenly. Logan moves over to the cabinet and pulls out a teacup, placing it carefully in his bag. His footsteps are heavy and echo as he travels down the ladder.

At the bottom, he screams out Virgil’s name.

 ***

  “Virgil! Virgil, can you hear me?”

Logan shook him hard, but he got no response.

 “Virgil, please, you need to get up. I need to know you are okay.” Logan had spotted him collapsed in the middle of the room and jumped down the ladder as soon as he could, forgoing the last four rungs and sliding over to where Virgil lay.

“Mm, not so loud Logan. My ears are ringing.”

 “Well, I expected that. You must have hit your head when you collapsed – can you tell me if I sound muffled as if I were underwater?”

 “No, everything’s just beyond loud.” Virgil winced as he sat up, Logan taking note of where he grabbed his head.  “Logan, are you okay? You’re crying!”

 A quick swipe at his eye revealed that a few tears had formed and escaped.

 “Well, of course – I am not without a heart, Virgil. The sight of you sprawled out like that was… immensely alarming, to say the very least.” Logan’s breath shuddered, and a few minutes of silence passed between the two, interrupted by an occasional hum from Virgil.

 “The ringing is gone.” The silence was broken, and with its absence came Logan’s ability to breath deeply.

 “That is wonderful, Virgil.” Logan stood up and dusted his jeans off before offering a hand to the other man. “May I ask what circumstances led to you losing consciousness?”

“I don’t know.” Virgil kicks at the floor. “So, don’t ask.”

 “Well, may I share some theories I have developed?”

“Knock yourself out.” Logan winced at the phrase, and Virgil mumbled an apology as he collected his equipment.

 “Virgil, I knew you were edging toward a panic attack on the way here – so I would like to start by offering a sincere apology for not saying anything sooner.”

    “Don’t. I didn’t tell you, so it’s my fault. I just didn’t want you to worry too much – or to turn around. I know Roman would have given you a hard time if we didn’t film an episode here, so I figured I would just deal.”

 “As I have told you many times, there is no ‘dealing’ with these situations alone in our friendship. Regardless, I knew you were not okay and didn’t say anything.”

 “God, Logan, can’t you let me blame myself for once? At least let me share the blame.”

“Fine, we shall share at your insistence. Moving on, I believe the building panic caused you to experience an irregular breathing pattern. I deduce that the lack of oxygen led to you losing-”

“No. You’re wrong.”

 “I beg your pardon? You just told said you did not know what happened how can you say I am wrong?”

 “Because it’s embarrassing, okay?! Damnit, Logan, it’s embarrassing how bad this attack was and how ridiculous my shit brain makes me react.” Virgil strode away, and out of the room, calling over his shoulder.

“Just help me film some stuff so people don’t know that the passing out act was real. I’ll lay down over there, and just… I dunno we’ll improvise.”

“Is it wise to publish this footage? Roman and his teasing be damned, it is more important that you are okay, Virgil! These cameras likely have footage of you panicking and us arguing! Are a few views really worth it?”

“Yes, because I wanted this episode! I put the poll on Twitter, not Roman, okay? So please, let’s film something stupid, make the whole thing look staged, and leave.”

 “Virgil-”

 “Please, Logan.”

 “No.” Logan crossed his arms and stood up straight. He was taller than Virgil, and his glare was cold enough to give Virgil goosebumps.

 “I’m sorry, ‘no’? Oh, so now you say no! Not when I asked to come here, not when I asked for demons to turn a flashlight, not when-”

“Virgil, stop this. You are behaving in an immature manner and this needs to stop. How was I supposed to know that you wanted me to tell you ‘no’? I am not a mind reader, so you cannot blame your poor communication skills on my inability to instantly know what you want.”

Virgil said nothing. He glared at Logan and sat down on the floor, eventually inviting him to do the same. They sat there for a while, as both needed time to calm down before speaking.

 After what felt like an eternity later, Virgil finally spoke up.

“I’m gonna start, but you need to let me finish before you cut in, okay?” Logan nodded, and Virgil took a deep breath. “I wanted to film at a haunted house because I knew we would get way more views than we normally do.

 “I thought, hey! More views means more add revenue – and yes, I know it’s not a lot – but with that extra money, we could start building up the funds to rent an apartment. I’m sick of living with my parents, Logan, and I know you are too.”

“I appreciate the sentiment, Virgil, but I would rather endure a few more years with them than have you hurting for the sake of loose change.”

 “Yeah, well. What’s done is done, I guess.” Virgil sighed and leaned over on Logan. “I lied, you know. I do know why I passed out earlier.” He sighed and buried his nose into Logan’s shoulder.

“I will not deny that I want to know why, Virgil, but I do not want you to share if you are uncomfortable.”

 “Heh, well, maybe you’ll learn something new – did you know that anxiety can make you see hallucinations? Specifically, when the fight or flight stuff kicks in?” Logan raises an eyebrow but remains silent. “When the, uh, the – instinct, for lack of better word – kicks in, your pupils dilate.

 “And when that happens, the sudden light change can cause a person – like me – to see shadows and figures at the edge of my vision.”

 “Fascinating – but I assume this is a rare situation and does not happen to you often?”

“No, it doesn’t. But it did when… did you break something upstairs? Because something shattered, there was a lot of thumping, and then they just- appeared. I think that made me panic even more, and then yes – the lack of oxygen probably did the rest.”

“Ah, yes, I fell into a cabinet of china, and I believe a plate was shattered. I apologize for my involvement.”

“Nah, no worries about that. It was just shoddy circumstances. And,” Virgil looked up, offering a weak grin to Logan, “As cheesy as it sounds, we are probably a bit closer than we were before this whole trip.”

“You are right, that is extremely cliché. I appreciate the sentiment, however, despite how infuriating your statement is. Shall we film the ending of this video, now?”

Virgil snorted, pushing himself up using Logan’s shoulder.

“Yeah, let’s this thing wrapped up.”

 ***

  “Virgil! Virgil, please get up!” Logan is frantically shaking Virgil’s shoulder, his voice wobbly. The camera has been left on after being discarded in a hurry.

“Logan… Logan no, don’t- don’t go in the closet.”

 “I spent ten years in the closet, I have no intention of going back in.” Logan sniffs as he speaks, and Virgil gasps awake, shooting upward.

“Huh? Wait, what happened? …Why would you go back in the closet?”              

 “You said not to go in there – what happened to you?”

 “I don’t- I don’t remember. There was a- I think I saw something, Logan. A shadow, maybe?”

 “You must have seen my shadow as I came down the ladder.”

“No, I don’t think so.” Virgil pauses and stares at a spot on the wall behind Logan. “Where is the ladder you came down?”

 “To your left.” Logan gestures with his head as he hoists Virgil to his feet.

 “That means it couldn’t have been your shadow. The light wouldn’t have hit you correctly to cast a shadow over there.” Virgil points to a closet off to the side of the ladder. “Besides, the shadow didn’t look… well not to be cliché, but it didn’t look human.”

“Preposterous.” Logan has moved over to the camera, and the screen goes black as he picks it up. A few moments later, it’s aimed at Virgil as he talks about what he saw in detail.

“…and it had, well they weren’t horns per say, but they were definitely not something that’s on your head, nerd. But, whatever,” Virgil rolls his eyes, “I can tell you don’t believe me. Let’s just get out of here.”

  Logan hums in agreement, and the screen goes black.

 ***

  “Goodbye, murder house, see you never!”

 “Well, this footage is unusable.”

 “Wait, why?”

 “I am not ending the video with you flipping off an old house.” Logan sighed and turned the camera off. Virgil pouted and turned to finish packing the equipment into his car.

“Hey, I know what I’mma call this video. ‘Logan finds a body’!” Virgil spread his arms out in emphasis, narrowly missing Logan’s face in the process.

 “That is absolutely morbid, Virgil, and uncharacteristically short.” Logan shut the trunk with a slam and fished the keys out of his bag as Virgil moved to the front seat.

 “Yeah, no, it’ll have emojis in it, the vlog title of course, and-”

  “By chance, will it be the proper title?” The car started with a roar, and the two were met with a blast of warm air. Virgil scrambled to open his window and Logan quickly shut off the air flow. “Because the channel is called ‘VergeofDiscovery’, not the childish pun Patton came up with.”

 “The Theory of Real-Activity is an amazing name, and I will fight you on this. You’re just jealous that you didn’t come up with it.”

 “Falsehood!”

 “Keep telling yourself that, nerd. Pass me the aux cord.”

The drive home was lighter than the last one – Virgil never once changed the music and the two could be heard screaming along as they flew down the road. The stress ball remained in the cup holder, untouched until the next big adventure.

[polarbearvien-prettycurves]

Two month old 24-year-old self

I was wondering how I've been since then. Same duration with my quarantine life as solo and yolo. 😄

The world stopped revolving because of the pandemic yet it's kinda not that for me as my mind is wandering as always. It may sound selfish but somehow there was a time that I wished that the world would stop for a moment as I couldn't really catch up and I am really lost. I didn't know this gonna happen for real but not in the way that pandemic would be the reason. I just want it to simply stop without any reason for me breathe at least. Now, that it is really happening, it can be a cure or a torture or maybe both in many ways. It seems like my zodiac year stopped and felt like a breather.

Anyways, this is how I was since then. Time is swift and within that short span of time many things happen, like twists and turns.

I faced a lot of things and it really challenged me bigtime. I made decisions I didn't know I could like being bold and honest of how I feel and stand for myself. I showed people if I am upset towards them and I just don't settle for being treated that way anymore just to keep things at peace even if it comprises me, my well-being. Big no for this now. I would rather lose some people than to lose myself. Maybe this is the start of learning self-love and finally giving it to myself this time. I can't please everyone and that's okay. I don't want to live like that anyway. I never do. It's just that I have this too much understanding and kind heart but was underrated, unappreciated and abused by many. So I am trying to save and heal it!

Maybe some things are meant to happen. I am grateful that I did. I just couldn't imagine being locked up here and living with someone I am not in good terms with. Good thing is I was brave enough to be vocal and confront that person whom I used to be my roommate that is also workmate in the office about our setup in the dorm. It is nice that she left immediately before the hard lockdown. This is the best way for us though as it would a torture and unhealthy for both of us if we continue to be housemates. Actually, this is the first time I felt that sometimes parting is a good thing. Hahaha.

Since then, I was able to start to do things I wanted to do on my own without minding other people around me and no more hesitations to do so. How peaceful that is to me. I don't have to feel the need to take care of others who is not also grateful about that anyway so I'd rather stop. Haha. This time, I am taking care of myself, still learning but I do in the best way I can. Hehe.

I do things on my own. Strong and independent woman here. Haha. Trying my best as I fight my inner demons to live and keep myself sane in a new and unknown enviroment where I only have myself to rely on. I do the grocery, strategize and decide over things as I pray to God for me to be safe and sound, as I push myself to trust and believe in me too. So far, so good and I am grateful for everything even if things were more difficult than it used to be when I can just go anywhere before the quarantine restrictions and all that.

In this kind of setup, I am also dealing more with myself closely especially my thoughts and feelings. I tried to confront myself with it sometimes, but most of the time I tried to make myself busy and distracted from those. It's pretty hard honestly. I sometimes I can't help but dwell in it like I am drowning in my own yet manage to swim and rise from it. I got to ask question myself with a lot of things like who I really am, what do I really want to do in life, how stagnant my life is in this stage like I still in no progress zone. I haven't proven anything nor at least financially capable but simply a cycle of sustenance to survive everyday living and fulfill basic responsibilities on my shoulders.

I also try to forget some things and people. I even dare to have attempts to do the things I was so afraid of like detaching and letting go little by little. I had my 5 phases of grief over things and people I am attached with or I love and care too much. I am finally learning to not get involve myself with those. Well, before this lockdown, I had convo with some relatives and confronted with the history of family issues I, we, used to ignore and after exchanges of sentiments. It happens to be the end of everything and finally cut our ties. It should have been done a long time ago but for Dad's sake I just kept silent about it and since he's gone, these things are bound to happen anyway. Maybe this is how peace can be achieved. No matter how we would want to keep some people and things, it is not meant for keeps but just a season.

As for this ecq, actually just around 2 to 3 days ago... I decided to get rid of pictures in a whim. So far I didn't regret it. Hahaha. Those pics was from the person I used to care for but I am taking this time to forget and get over with. Hahaha. Yeah, it is very hard for me to delete pictures as I am a memory keeper but I have to. Maybe I am a little bit changed. Haha. But before this, I usually rant at facebook but mostly in twitter through my threads of tweets about everything I think and feel. Haha. Yet, I decided to deactivate my main facebook account since yesterday for real to hibernate myself and to detox with technology particularly with social media as I spent most of time there instead of dedicating it to myself. I want to totally deactivate from everything but I couldn't as it is also my source of info and my communication iny work. Hayss. Haha. For now, I keep anything else active but less engaged except for youtube for music, vlogs and random videos. Hahaha. Yet, I wanted to be productive but my procrastination and unmotivated self impede me to do so. Haha. I hope moving forward I could have that discipline and consistency to finally achieve my goals. But for now, maybe I will focus on healing with my pains, wounds and scars, knowing myself more, doing my hobbies, learning new things and working on to be the best of myself soon. That's how I want this quarantine. Wish me luck and I pray I will!

[dorothydelgadillo]

How to Write a Badass Professional Bio for Every Platform

Maybe you just got a snazzy new job or a big promotion.

Or maybe you’re about boost your brand with a speaking gig or a blog contribution and your professional bio has gone the way of those tortilla chips in the back of the cabinet (a bit stale).

Either way, it’s time to chain yourself to your keyboard and write something we all dread -- a professional bio.

Writing about yourself isn’t easy. It’s a fine line between cocky and confident and you’re never quite sure when you’ve locked down the totality of your career and passions.

Full transparency: When I started at IMPACT in February, I had to write one of these monsters myself -- and to be honest, I don’t like how it came out:

“Jason is a journalist-turned-marketer passionate about how storytelling and targeted messaging create business-changing content.

As an Account Executive, he is responsible for implementing inbound marketing strategies that help his clients increase brand awareness, generate leads, and acquire new customers.

When he isn’t working, you’ll find Jason reading on the beach, hunting down mono vinyl, and playing guitar.”

I’m going to hit two birds with this post and provide actionable tips and advice that will help put your mind (and mine) at ease so we can write better professional bios.  

After all, this is some of the most important public-facing copy we will ever write. When done right, your bio can help expand your personal brand, build awareness for yourself and your business, or even win you new business.

Upon these words rest the fate of our entire careers.  

Okay, I’m being hyperbolic but you get it; Our bios are an important first impression and we often neglect them because it is uncomfortable to write about ourselves.    

Without further adieu, this is my guide to writing badass bios for every major platform.    

General Tips

Let’s start with some quick things you should, and shouldn’t, do no matter where the bio is going to be posted.

Things you should do:

Pick the Right Point of View

When deciding whether to write your bio in the first (I) or third (Jason Rose) person, the general rule of thumb is to consider who is introducing you.

Meaning, when your bio appears on a company page, you are being introduced by your company so it makes sense to use the third person.

Ditto for conferences or most publications. I know it makes you feel like Kanye West, but unless it’s explicitly requested, get those “I”s out of your bio.

On the other hand, when you are writing a bio for your social media profile, it is better to the use the first person. Here you’re perceived as the “publisher,” so you’re introducing yourself.  

Establish why you’re qualified (but be human)

It’s a tall order, but a good bio establishes your experience and qualifications, but also that you’re a human being complete with a pulse and a personality.

If an AI application could machine-learn how to write your bio by crawling job descriptions — you’re doing something wrong.

Have a human voice and tone that is professional enough to represent you from 9 to 5, but doesn’t completely betray who you are from 7 to 10.       

Even if you’re in a field that is very conservative, use human language and avoid jargon specific to your industry.  

Things you shouldn’t do:

Play Buzzword Bingo

It’s easier to learn from the don'ts than the do’s — so I will fall back on my sword.  

I think my least favorite thing about my bio is the sour note I played with this first sentence.

“Jason is a journalist-turned-marketer passionate about how storytelling and targeted messaging create business-changing content.”

Journalist-turned-marketer is interesting enough and conveys my career path but everything after passionate is a buzzword or a conjunction setting up another buzzword.

That’s not to say buzzwords don’t have their place. After all, they communicate to an audience that you’re in their tribe and have a shared language, but, when we take industry jargon too far, we are just hiding behind it and safely filling space.

It’s better to speak in universal terms that resonate with your community, but could be understood by anyone.  

When possible, break away from buzzwords and you’ll stand out from the sea of sameness.  

Be all tell, no show   

Someone as apparently “passionate about storytelling” as I am should know to follow the most golden of all story rules.

Show, don’t tell.

According to wikipedia, this idiom is credited to Russian playwright Anton Chekhov who said "Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass."

You may be working with fewer characters than Chekhov, but whenever possible don’t tell someone who you are, show them.

Fellow IMPACTer Liz Murphy’s bio is a great example of this.

“As IMPACT's content strategist, Liz does more than wrangle commas. With more than 10 years of editorial and inbound marketing experience, she's obsessed with innovating new ways of creating amazing content that's absurdly useful and effective. (She also works with in-house contributors and clients as an editor, strategist, interviewer, coach, and sometimes therapist.)”  

What a great first note.

I started my bio with a screeching violin and this is Jimmy Page’s first bend in the Stairway to Heaven guitar solo (the moment that song no longer sucks).

Instead of telling you “I’m skilled editorially but can wear many marketing hats” with her first sentence, Liz showed you: “As IMPACT's content strategist, Liz does more than wrangle commas.

Bravo, Liz.    

Make it all about you

How dare you make your bio all about yourself.

Like any great copy, if your bio doesn’t explicitly its intended audience value, it’s dead on arrival.  

Using Liz’s bio once again as an example, “No matter which hat she's wearing, her goal is simple -- to empower organizations and thought leaders to differentiate themselves and drive measurable results through game-changing content.

Throughout her career, Liz has worked with organizations across a wide range of industries -- from cyber security and health care, to government sales and insurance.”

If I’m a business stakeholder reading this bio, I know what’s in it for me.  

Different Copy for Different Platforms

While the tips above are best practices no matter what, bios aren’t one size fits all and each platform has specific constraints and considerations.

Let’s discuss some of the most common and important:

1. The Company/Team Page

The most important thing to keep in mind when writing a professional bio for your company’s collateral is that you want to differentiate yourself, but within the value proposition of your company and in their voice and tone.  

To put it simply, you want to stand out but not too much.  

I think we all agree that consistent messaging is a must for any brand or business, but I still sometimes come across impeccably written websites with a singular voice and tone, until I get to the author bios.

Then, suddenly the organization feels like a collection of individuals, and no matter how interesting they all personally appear to be, they don’t communicate that this business is a united entity focused on providing me the product, solution, or service I sorely need.    

2. Blogs and third-party publications

The best advice I have to offer with blog bios is to ensure that it speaks directly to the subject you are writing about.

Think Aristotle’s ethical appeals. There is no ethos in using the limited inline space of a blog about quantum physics to share that you love to snowboard.

For third-party publications, you’ll usually have to defer to the style prescribed by the editor.

My suggestion: use the bio to sneak in a link back to one of your owned web properties.

Aside from that sweet link juice, this sends users who like your article to somewhere you have complete control of messaging and how they can engage with you.  

3. LinkedIn

LinkedIn caps your bio (called a summary here) at 2,000 characters.

This gives you plenty of real estate to stretch out and write more, but just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.

Keep it tight and only share as much is necessary to tell your story.

Also, be cognizant of what is visible before the visitor expands the module and clicks <see more>.

If you’re buying the good stuff, chances are no one is going to click show more.

Chris, our COO at IMPACT, does a great job in his LinkedIn summary of differentiating himself with his core principles and military background before the user has to click.

4. Facebook

Unlike LinkedIn, Facebook only gives you 101 characters to share your story.

It does, however, give you the unique option to set your bio as permanent or temporary in 1 hour, 1 day, 1 week, or custom increments. These temporary bios keep the information fresh and allow you to describe not just who you are, but what is most exciting in your career right now.  

For many of us, Facebook is largely a platform for our personal relationships, while professional networking activities live on LinkedIn, but if you’re building a personal brand, your Facebook page is an integral asset.

For tips and tricks about how to build a personal brand with Facebook, I defer to the always informative Neil Patel.   

5. Twitter

While I’ve made my feelings about my company bio clear, I actually like my Twitter Bio.  

The constraints (160 characters) and the short-hand of the platform provide the opportunity to get creative. It’s also worth noting that the platform is comparatively much less stuffy than LinkedIn, so feel free to have fun with it.    

Just don’t go full 2014 with MARKETER | WRITER | LOVER OF PANDAS or mention that you like to drink coffee.  

While I haven’t taken advantage, it’s a good idea to hashtag any industry relevant keywords to boost the discoverability of your profile, and don’t forget to @ your company!

6. Instagram 

Instagram bios force you to make due with 150 characters or less.

Given the platform’s users can’t put links into posts, that is one of the most important functions of the bio.

Like Twitter, make sure you include hashtags that lead to relevant galleries, or @ links that lead to your company’s profile.  

Think of your Instagram bio almost like PPC ad copy that you are using to drive people to content. You have to be short and savvy about how you use your space.

7. Speaking Proposals and Collateral

The great thing about writing your bio for speaking engagements is that you know the specific audience it should be tailored for.

So often we struggle with our LinkedIn/Twitter/Company bios because we are trying to be all things to all people.

To knock your speaking bio out of the park, learn all you can about the audience for the specific event or conference. Who has attended in the past? What was the most popular topic?

Uncover their needs (articulated or not), and tailor your bio messaging to demonstrate why you will be the speaker that’s forcing latecomers to stand in the back.  

I hoped this post helped you shed imposter syndrome (I’m projecting) and now you can write bios for any platform that put your best foot forward.  

from Web Developers World https://www.impactbnd.com/blog/how-to-write-a-professional-bio