#at least I set myself up for heartbreak already

[sofiareidings]

I'm Not Yours

Summary: You're getting over a breakup and meet a cute guy on a case, what you didn't realise was that your best friend has been waiting for years. Warning: Swearing

A/N: I'm sorry my post is so late!! I had it queued up to post at 9am like normal and then it didn't?? And then I had a math test so I couldn't go on my phone or anything, AND THEN HALF THE STORY JUST DISSAPPEARED SO I HAD TO REWRITE IT?!?!? It has been quite the hassle. Also this was a prompt from @andiebeaword's 3000 follower celebration! The first sentence of the story was the prompt. Also, I meant for this to be gn!reader so if anyone sees any she/he pronouns for reader please tell me! Love you all <333

Word Count: 1.5k

Song Suggestions: Yours - Conan Gray

"I can't stand you choosing another person over me, again."

***

His bright blue eyes shined in the sun, a ray hitting across his face perfectly. Pushing his short brown hair out of his face while smiling at you made your insides flutter, completely forgetting about your ex now.

"So as I was saying, it would be best for you and your team to set up here. There's lots of room and we haven't used it in years." His voice came out in this long, deep tone. JJ walked into the room raising an eyebrow at you before taking over the conversation with the officer.

"What was that look?" Jumping slightly, you turned around and saw Penelope. It was that once a year situation where she actually had to join the rest of the team for a case. "Someone likes the officer."

The girls took any chance they could to get you to talk to the guy. They weren't wrong, you did think he was insanely cute but, you just weren't quite sure if you had the guts to really talk to him.

"I do not!" You laughed, "And even if I did…it's not like anything could happen." Penelope continued pestering and Emily joined the conversation and made sure to give her opinion as well.

***

"You better at least get his number, we're only gonna be here for a few more days." Penelope had been bugging you the most out of anyone, "Well, I let you sit on that thought. I need to go work my wonderful magics so I will talk to you about this later." She smiled and strutted away back to her laptop setup down the hall.

"What was Garcia talking about?" Turning back to the task at hand, Spencer was standing at a board. Working on the case. "Is this about that officer?" His voice was very flat, little emotion which was unusual for him. Especially around you, the two of you had been best friends since you transferred to the BAU.

"Yeah it was, she's trying to get me to get his number." Not turning from his work you started to flip through some files and continue to talk. "I do think he's pretty hot, but I also think it's way too early to start putting myself out there you know?"

"Yeah, yeah I guess I can understand that." Peeking over his shoulder briefly to look at you. Hearing the way you were talking about this guy was leaving him conflicted. The first day he had met you he'd already fallen in love. No statistic or math problem could explain how that happened. He's been sitting on the sideline for the past three years, watching you go from boyfriend to boyfriend, letting him be your shoulder to cry on when it was heartbreak after heartbreak. But honestly, he didn't know how long he could keep going like this.

"...But it could also be some type of fate thing. Like, I break up with a toxic asshole and then meet a dreamy police officer? I don't know, what do you think Spencer?" Walking over to him to put up some photos and thoughts on the board you look up at him, waiting for his response.

"Whatever you think is best I suppose," It took him a long time to respond, the way you were speaking of this guy was just breaking his heart more and more. It was taking all his power to not just scream 'I LOVE YOU!!' and see your reaction. "Do you want to ask him out."

"I think so, I guess he is really nice, and really good looking…" Going on about him a bit more, you paused then changed your thought process. "I mean everything and everyone is telling me to go for it but some small part of me is saying no."

"I think I'm just being paranoid, why shouldn't I put myself out there? It has been like three months. And if it doesn't work out, so what? At least I tried. I think I'll do it." Just like that, the hope died. Should he just say it? Get it out there and hope for the best? This was impossible.

"What does that mean? Are you just not ready to put yourself out there again or is it because there's someone else?" A small glimmer of hope ignited in him, maybe he still had a chance after all.

***

"I'm going to do it. So you can stop annoying me about it, Pen." She smiled and started to ramble about how it will be so good for you. The case had been solved and you were all packing up. Everyone with the exception of Hotch and Rossi were in the room given to the team.

"I'm so glad you're going to do this! You two would be such a sexy pair I just know it." You and Penelope continued to talk, but Spencer was just heartbroken. Standing on the opposite side of the room he could still hear you. He was packing up his things slowly, hoping to get a chance to talk to you alone.

"You should just go for it kid, don't let them get with another guy without you atleast saying it." Derek, giving his opinion to Spencer while leaning against the wall. Tossing a ball now that he was all packed up.

"What if you say something and they like you back?" Derek counter protested. Spencer thought about it for a minute, he had a point. But on the other hand he couldn't tell what would be worse; watching you ask someone else out again or telling you and losing such an important person in his life.

"I know, I just don't want to ruin three years of friendship. What if I say something and they never talk to me again?" He questioned, still listening in on your conversation.

***

"I'll be done in a minute!" You called out to Penelope and Emily. Still packing up your things it was only you and Spencer left in the room.

Finally throwing your bag over your shoulder you started to catch up to the rest of the team you heard Spencer call out to you. "Wait! Can I talk to you for a minute, please?"

"Yeah, of course." A little confused on why he sounded so nervous you stood infront of him, waiting for him to continue. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing it's just," He cleared his throat, no or never. "I was just wondering if you gave that officer your number yet."

"Oh, not yet. I was actually about to do that. Why do you ask?" Titling your head, curious. He started to fidget with his hands, not sure what to say.

"Oh, so you are going out with him." His voice barely above a whisper. "That's nice I suppose."

"Okay…" You smiled and started to head to the door. "I'm going to go now, see on the jet Spencer?"

"I- please, I need to say something." He tripped over his words, come on Spencer, just say it!!!

"Are you okay? You seem nervous." Why was he acting like this? It was so confusing to you.

"Okay, I'm just going to say it." He sighed, "I don't want you to go out with that officer. I mean if you really want to you should do it of course but I don't want you to because I want you to go out with me. If you don't feel the same way tell me but it's just, I can't stand you choosing another person over me, again." Biting the inside of his cheek, waiting for your response.

"Oh," Was all you could say at first. You didn't really know what else to say. "You, you like me?"

"Yeah, I do. And if you don't feel the same way I get it and pretend I never said anything because I don't want to lose you. But if you go out and date this guy I'm going to have to put up a boundary, I'm sorry."

"Spencer, I don't know what to say," You laughed lightly, not sure how to say what you were thinking. "I feel the same way, I just assumed you never would like me back so I have been trying to get over it."

"Really?" He smiled and gave that puppy-dog face he always made. "Are you serious?"

"Why would I lie?" Throwing your bag over your shoulder you hugged him then stepped back giving a small smile. "We should go though, the jet is supposed to leave like now. But can we talk about this later?"

"I would like that." The two of you started to head out, and you completely forgot about the officer. Spencer just walked out with a huge smile on his face. Why didn't he say this sooner???

[jennapancake]

Love Made Me Crazy

Luke Castellan x Aphrodite!Reader

Part 1 of 2

Warnings: Angst, heartbreak, Reader is referred to as y/n and as female, kissing, implications of death, not proof-read.

Summary: Aphrodite children are required to break their first loves heart in order to avoid tragedy. What happens when reader breaks luke castellans heart in order to save him when he's already on the edge.

A/n: Hi this is my first time ever writing so please be nice. I'm trying my best. Thank you for reading!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The tears poured as I stared at the lake in front of me. The inability to determine if it were the sobs that raked my body or the cold night air causing me to shiver as I prayed to the goddess I knew to be my mother. I prayed for her to spare me from this "initiation" as she calls it. To spare me from having to break my best friends heart in order to save him and myself.

Luke had been my best friend since the day I set foot in camp. It was 5 years ago. Luke had arrived not long before me, but he still chose to show me around camp. The boy and I became close after that and even closer when the two of us continued to stay in the Hermes cabin as his father claimed him and my godly parent refused to be asserted with me in any way. The comfort shared between us both was hardly unnoticed but it drew our bond close.

And yet now, I have to break this bond we share due to some horrible rule my mother has set for her children. The same rule she set for me, the child she ignored for almost a year after I set foot in this camp.

"Please mom just this once favor me and my choices and allow me to avoid breaking both his heart and mine. Allow me to stay with him without the consequences please." I'd been sobbing prayers like this since the sun set. I knew it was useless. I knew I wouldn't get a response and even if I did it would never be in my favor.

"y/n?" I don't know how long it had been since I strayed from my siblings at dinner to sit here but I knew it had been hours as Drew came up behind me. "Are you okay?" The girl asked, a gentle hand on my shoulder as she sat next to me.

"I'm okay" I nodded, quickly wiping the tears that stained my cheeks. "Just admiring the lake and some alone time ya know?" I let out a fake laugh that sounded almost like a sob as I turned to look at the girl.

"It's about the rule, isn't it?" She asked, a sympathetic look clouding her beautiful features. I nodded in response to which she pulled me close. "It'll be okay. I know you love him but it's better than meeting a horrific end." She says and I know she's right and I know I have to do it soon. "Silena and I will be there to help you through it too. We won't let you go through this alone."

"I know. Its just hard knowing we have to end just because of some stupid rule my mother made. Just another reason why for our parents to dictate our lives." I sniffled and she nodded, combing her fingers through my hair to calm me.

"I understand, love. Its just another reason why our parents won't be winning any parent of the Year awards. However I'd rather you get both your hearts broke than lose you to a Shakespearean level tragic ending." She says, the eye roll evident in her tone as she says the last few words.

I know she's been through this before with other siblings. But even if love doesn't kill me how does she know the next quest won't.

"I just want you to be happy and alive. You'll find other men who will love you, you're a daughter of Aphrodite after all."

But I don't want anyone else.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning....

I had made up my mind or at least I thought I had stopped by training to see Luke before breakfast and his counselor duties.

"Luke!" I called a smile on my face. I had decided to risk it all. I was in love and nothing could break us apart, not after three years pining after each other and almost a full year together. I was not letting us go.

Luke smiled at me, telling his class to take a break as he ran over to me. Except right before he got to me an Apollo kid was disarmed and the blade of his sword was mere inches from Luke's head, landing right in front of my feet.

The smile draining from my face as I wondered if this was a coincidence. I know I was told there was little time left before an ending began to appear but was it really starting now. Were these the warning signs?

I pushed those thoughts away as the boy came closer after scolding the kids. "Hey, are you okay?" He asked, grabbing both my cheeks gently and giving me a worried look as he checked me for any injuries.

"I'm fine," I gave him a reassuring smile "I should be the one asking if you're okay. That sword almost took your head off." I gestured to the sword with my head as the boy chuckled.

"Yeah, Apollo kids aren't the best with swords." He joked but shook his head, "but I'm all good. Especially now that I get to see you." He smirked before pulling me into a kiss.

That was only the first straw in one big hay barrel that was today. Throughout the day, I almost drowned, Luke almost got run over by a group of centaurs, I almost got shot by archers since no one told me they moved the archery field, and Luke almost fell into the rack of spears.

And all of this happened before lunch.

"Silena you don't understand. I thought it'd be okay if we stayed together but everything is falling apart today. Luke and I have been in so many dangerous positions today it's insane." I practically yelled as the girl brushed my hair.

"Are you sure you're not overthinking everything? It was a rough night for you. Maybe you're just seeing the everyday dangers more today?" Silena was always the voice of reason but I knew it was just excuses to comfort me.

Silena never wanted Luke and me to break up. As she put it we were her best accomplishment and the cutest couple at camp, all thanks to her help for finally getting us together.

"Sil, you and I both know it's starting. I can't lose him cause of my own selfishness. I'm gonna have to break up with him." I say, tears filling my eyes at the thought.

"or you could tell him the truth and let him decide your fate?" She shrugs and I shake my head.

"I know what he'll choose and I can't do that to him. I can't let him decide to be with me when it'll result in the end for both of us."

My mind was made up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Luke and I were sat on the docks, the cool breeze of the night blowing between us as we stared at the star in silence, until Luke spoke up and the end began.

"So what did you want to talk about that was so important?" He asked, a small smile on his face as he glanced at me, the hand he was holding between us, squeezed mine tightly until I forced myself to pull it from his hold.

"oh uh, Luke I don't know how to say this.." I sighed as I played with my camp necklace to comfort myself as I spoke to the boy in front of me.

"Hey it's okay. " The boy reached out the touch my arm "Whatever it is we'll get through it together." He smiled gently which only caused my heart to ache more.

I shook my head and stood up quickly in order to look away from the boy and take my chance to pace on the dock as I do the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.

And that's saying a lot seeing as a fought two minotaurs at once.

"Luke we need to break up." I said as quickly as possible, knowing if I didn't blurt it out the words would never come.

"woah what?" The boy quickly stood to come over to me "y/n what do you mean we need to?"

"I mean we can't be together anymore, Luke." I said, tears forming in my eyes as I look up at him.

"Why? I thought we were doing good. Whatever it is we can work through it. Just talk to me. Why so suddenly are you saying this?" Luke asks, tears filling his water line and I shake my head.

"This isn't something we can get out of, Luke. This is something we have to go through in order for me to protect you. I'm sorry, Luke."

And so I ran in order to avoid any more questions, in order to avoid changing my mind, in order to protect the boy I was crazy in love with.

I would have risked my life for him if it meant getting to stay with him for all eternity but I couldn't bring myself to risk his life for a life on the run from a never ending tragedy.

If only I wasn't an Aphrodite Kid....

End of Part 1.

Next part will be Luke's POV and where more of a dark Luke esc will come in and as well as the aftermath of the moment. Again thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

[artheresy]

No but I don’t think anyone understands how deeply I need to witness Blade identity crisis content like, the focus on identity usually with the HCQ and the struggles usually centers around Dan Heng because of course! We get the content in canon touched upon, expanding on it with your own view is so much fun and I want to do it myself at some point.

But the potential of Blade? And exploring his fucked relationship with his identity and with Yingxing? MWAH, delicious, and not done enough compared to something I do see a bit whenever the topic comes up which no hate to anyone for but I have my own opinions on it

Like, shit Blade has HUGE issues with dehumanizing himself as a result of Jingliu’s teaching in which she projected her own self dehumanization onto him and taught him to turn his body into a weapon and remember the feeling of death. He doesn’t view himself as being a person, he is nothing more than a sword for slaying, a weapon whose path is soaked in the blood of both his victims and himself. And UGH listen, I’ve already ranted about this so many times that y’all are probably tired of hearing me talk about it.. it truly is one of my favorite topics, the disconnection between Yingxing and Blade that does exist in canon to certain extent. Though he takes on the weight of his sin as his own and his duty to repay it (and make sure Dan Heng repays it too), the ways in which he doesn’t connect to Yingxing in other matters is used in such a tragic way when you peel back the layers upon layers that can relate to the simplest things. Like fucking hell, not to mention it again but the use of craftsmanship between the two of them is heartbreaking as crafting represents not only what he happened to do as apart of the HCQ and in the end his legacy, but how it is used as a representation of his passion that Blade does not share, how it represents the revenge that dominated his life as Yingxing built on the pain and trauma of losing his entire family and home while still such a young child which Blade probably doesn’t even fully remember anymore let alone connect with. I swear, that hurts, it hurts me every time I think about it.

I also just have a lot of my own headcanons that I firmly don’t think are canon, but are things I instead sprinkle in like finishing salt into my wounds to make myself even more sad. Like thinking about Blade in a way constantly being in mourning, not solely for Baiheng, but genuinely in mourning for Yingxing as well. Although he used to be Yingxing, that man is still dead and gone and never coming back, never in a way that will actually be Yingxing. So I like to imagine he mourns for him as well. Not just his death but mourns the severed connection between them. The passions he cannot submerge himself in, the pure dedication he cannot fathom, the love and happiness he cannot even begin to imagine the feeling of. Or at least not the warmth of them, he only feels the bitter shards of those feelings left within him, making his hatred all the more agonizing and deep set.

Hm… I wonder how we’re going to see Blade progress as the story keeps going on. I do truly hope we get more of an exploration of this. I need to see what happens to him. I need to see how his mindset ends up evolving or instead of evolving, the sheer amount of shit it ends up getting him into. God do I love this man, sorry that my love manifests in needing to see him suffering. It just comes with the territory

[princessamericachavez]

911 6x11 Coda

Read in AO3 too

“So this dreamland of yours,” Eddie says after a comfortable silence filled only by the background noise of the sports commentators, “what was it really like?”

“Super freaky,” Buck huffs a laugh. “I told you already.”

“No,” Eddie drawls the word with playful annoyance. “You told us the saccharine version because Christopher was there. Or because you didn’t want someone else to know the details. I don’t know,” he shrugs. “All I know is you aren’t telling the whole story.”

“I am,” Buck tries, but can hear the uncertainty in his own voice.

Eddie finally peels his eyes off the tv screen to pin him with a knowing look.

“Buck, I know you. You were holding back. Which… fine, you don't owe the entire world details about whatever was going on in your brain during a coma. I get it. But, c’mon, it’s me. Spill.”

Buck bites the inside of his cheek. There are details he really doesn't want to reach the others. He doesn’t want to upset anyone with the fucked up things his subconscious came up with. But… yeah, this is Eddie. Somehow, it feels wrong not to tell him.

“Bobby was dead.”

Even now, in the real world, having seen him just a few hours ago for lunch, the words get stuck in his throat. Buck hates the way his voice shakes with the ghost of heartbreak, still remembers the sensation of the world crashing down around him when Chimney (fake Chimney) told him. He tightens the grip of his beer, letting the sting of his wounded hands ground him in this reality.

Eddie arches his eyebrows. “What happened?”

“He… fell off the wagon. No one noticed, until it was too late.”

“Because you weren’t there?” Eddie’s expression turns critical. “Buck, you do know Bobby’s sobriety isn’t your responsibility, right?”

“I know. I know. The world doesn’t revolve around me,” he rolls his eyes, taking a sip of his beer to wash down the bitterness. “But you… you didn’t know Cap before. Before you joined, for a while, he was… different. Too reserved. Like- like he thought if he didn’t get to know us, we’d be better off or something.”

He can see the confusion in Eddie’s eyes while the information sets in. He can’t blame him. This Cap, this Bobby, is so different it’s almost impossible to reconcile him with the one he first met.

“Anyway,” he tries to lighten the air, “I guess I was annoying enough to break him out of his shell a little, or make him laugh. Or maybe I’m just giving myself too much credit.”

Eddie lets out a noncommittal hum. “Guess I can see that.”

It feels good to have said it, to let it out, to have someone else know. He trusts Eddie’s discretion and knows that, if Bobby’s death comes to haunt him in his nightmares, he’ll at least have someone to tell. He’s ready to return his attention back to the game when Eddie pops a sudden question:

“And me? What was I like?”

“I told you.”

“Angry, yeah,” Eddie frowns. “So that’s it? Without you I’m just… angry guy?”

Buck laughs, shaking his head, and is about to change de subject when he notices that Eddie looks bothered by the statement. As if whatever Buck’s subconscious said about him was a big offense.

“It wasn’t about me,” he offers.

Eddie pins him with another look meant to strip him bare of his secrets. Buck looks down at his hands, unable to meet his eyes:

“You- you lost Chris. To your parents. Big messy legal battle. Hen- Hen said they declared you unfit to be a single dad and a firefighter.”

Eddie takes a big gulp of beer with his eyes on the screen.

“Oh, yeah… that’d piss me off.”

To Buck’s relief, he sounds lighthearted about it. He guesses it’s easier when it’s just a made up crazy reality in someone else’s dying brain, when it didn’t feel so real and definitive as it did to him.

“Guess no one else there introduced you to Carla.”

“And you weren’t there,” Eddie points, “to fight for him.”

“No, I wasn’t…”

Eddie nods, still staring at some point in the distance, clearly not watching the game. Buck waits him out, let’s the idea settle, because he knows his silences enough to guess this one prefaces a statement.

“And you didn’t meet me there?” He finally asks and, again, he seems offended with Buck’s subconscious.

Buck feels the need to defend himself:

“To be fair, you would’ve just called me crazy and called the cops on me or something. I mean, Chim and Hen were ready to roll with it, but you don’t even believe in jinxes. What do you think you would’ve said if a guy you’ve never met before showed up claiming to be your best friend from another life?”

Eddie laughs, really laughs, and Buck finds himself smiling too. On retrospect, he kinda wishes he had searched him out, just to have another ridiculous scenario to tell him about now.

“No, that’s- that’s true,” Eddie shakes his head, still smiling. “Probably would’ve dragged you to the nearest psych ward. Still…” he trails off.

“Still what?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. “I feel bad for that Eddie. Sounds like he could’ve used a Buck in his life.”

Buck is past feeling guilty for leaving those subconscious versions of his family behind (except for Chris, he’s never getting over that one), but he’d be lying if he said he hasn’t been running through scenarios in his head, wondering what could’ve happened if he’d stayed. (Aside from, obviously, being dead and all that).

“Yeah, I guess so,” he sighs sipping his beer. “Still, I don’t know how much I could’ve helped. I mean, of course, I would’ve tried to help you- him get Chris back. But I’m not sure how that’d work without the whole legal guardian thing, you know? I mean, m- maybe I could’ve found Ca-“

The cushion hits him square in the face and nearly makes him spill his beer.

“Hey! What’s that about?! I’m convalescent here!”

“That’s not what I meant."

“No?”

“No!” Eddie rolls his eyes, exasperated for some reason Buck doesn’t understand. “I mean… yeah, if I was in that position, of course, I’d want help getting my son back. But that’s not it…”

Buck scratches the back of his head, squinting at Eddie like it’ll somehow help him read between the lines of whatever he’s trying to say.

“Then what is it?”

“I just-“ Eddie stumbles with his words and sighs. “I just meant... it sounds like he could use a friend.”

What good would that do?

Buck doesn’t say it, but his face must betray the thought by the way Eddie’s mouth twists with annoyance.

“Buck, all your help with Chris, introducing us to Carla, you being part of his life, helping me raise him… of course, it means a lot. I don’t think I could’ve done this without you.”

“But?” He prompts.

“But,” Eddie says slowly, looking him in the eye, “that’s not all that matters. I mean, you’re my best friend, man. Even without all that, I’d want to be friends with you, hang out, laugh, do shit all on a Sunday night. That matters too.”

Just being Buck.

“Oh.”

Eddie looks away, takes two big gulps of beer, like they can wash down the emotional weight of what he’s trying to explain.

“I’m just saying,” he says, eyes still on the game they are both ignoring. “If I was going through that, it sounds like hell… I’d want a friend like you by my side. You’re a very good friend.”

Buck ducks his head to hide the heat of blood rushing through his entire face. “Uh, well, thanks… I- uh, I appreciate it. You’re a great friend too.”

He tries to picture Eddie without him. Tries to picture himself without Eddie. Both options seem impossible.

“Well, good thing we met," he decides with a grin, raising his beer lightly against Eddie's.

"Good thing you didn't die," Eddie says, and though he tries to hide it behind a sip of his beer and a distant look at the tv, Buck can feel the heaviness hidden behind that sentence. It only hits him at that moment... Eddie was maybe a little too close to finding out exactly what his life without Buck would be like. "I mean," he goes on with a shrug, "sucks for that other Eddie, but I'm not much of the sharing type. So I'm glad you came back."

"Of course," Buck smiles, trying to match the false lightness in his tone. "You're stuck with me."

"Good," Eddie nods a single time like the matter's settled. "But I'd rather not be stuck with this couch."

"It's so uncomfortable!" Buck chuckles, glad that someone finally brought it up.

"So uncomfortable!" Eddie agrees, finally meeting his eyes.

"My mom's always had the worst taste in furniture."

"Oh, so it runs in the family."

"Hey!" Buck pretends to be offended and throws the cushion back at his smug grinning face.

He misses by quite a bit (something to worry about later). Instead, the cushion knocks the beer bottle clean out of Eddie's hand and spills the dark liquid all over the couch's white fabric.

Buck and Eddie look at the growing stain. They stare at each other, silent, frozen with the sudden panic of two little kids about to be reprimanded by a grown-up. Except, there are no parents here...

...just two grown men who burst out laughing at the exact same time, bent over in a fit of giggles so loud that it drowns out the game's final touchdown. Not that anybody was watching, anyway.

[heliosdream]

I felt like hurting myself so have some Angst

Simon didn't understand why he decided to go, maybe he felt he should be the one to personally deliver the tags to the poor woman, a woman he had only heard about once from Johnny lips. Pretty little thing he had called her, pregnant with his sons… he had just gotten the letter telling him a few days before they had set off. He had already talked to Price about taking some time off to be with her, Simon had remembered how happy he was to see his wife.

His tags clutch in his hands, dead brown eyes looking down at the small house, a small river behind it, and plenty of trees surrounding it, a perfect little safe haven nuzzled in the Scotland wilderness. His boots crunches through the sticks and leaves that had fallen, every step closer felt like he was disturbing the perfect sanctuary that Johnny had created for himself and his family.

He stood and stops at the outline of the trees, where he finally see her. Johnny's words ring in his head, pretty little thing, She was down right gorgeous. He watches her with a little too much interest, she was only hanging some clothes and linens up but he just couldn't help to stare. The urge to move closer to her, to talk to her… yet anytime he tried, the feeling of crossing a boundary he wasn't ready to cross.

He knew he took the easy way out when he heard the pain cries and screams. He left the dog tags and the official letter of John Mactavish being K.I.A at the edge of the forest but in view for her to see them. As he walks back, he listens to her heartbreak it was the least he could do after taking such a cowards way out and simply hiding. A part of him knew he would her her screaming, he would rewatch Johnny's death in his dreams and the only sound he would hear would be her's.

[adelaidedrubman]

some scattered thoughts on plagiarism and sharing creative space in good faith before i turn my phone off and walk into the swamp 

so, this is a post i have avoided making for well over a year now. because i have spent well over a year minimizing, excusing, and trying to convince myself that i’m crazy and just imagining things. even more so, convincing myself that it’s worthless to talk about, because even if i talked about it, no one would particularly care, and i would only cause myself more heartbreak by officially confirming that. 

but the past few days in fandom have dredged up a lot of things for me and made me reevaluate. i’ve found immense reassurance from seeing how ready and willing everyone is to band together to keep the community safe from those entering with the intent to copy the work of others rather than creating their own. i won’t lie, seeing that unity and mobilization on my dash was at times bittersweet when it was interspersed by reblogs from someone who’d plagiarized me. 

but i also took the opportunity to move past the hurt and remember this is a community — seeing others have the courage to come forward and talk about the plagiarism they’d experienced inspired me to open up to more and more friends in private about my own experiences, and i cannot describe to you how relieving it has been to find myself validated and supported. sincerely, to everyone who has lent me an ear over the past few days, i appreciate it more than you know. i’ve been brought to tears several times, and feel like i now have the strength to talk about this. 

this is also a post i have backspaced on several time, because. well. frankly it’s difficult to even allude to the vague category of most obvious thing that was stolen from me without this amounting to a de facto callout post, which isn’t my intention so much as getting out my feelings and hopefully opening a dialogue about the lasting harm plagiarism does. 

so. i’ll just start by saying one of the most hurtful things about plagiarism is that it destroys the implicit trust that everyone is entering a creative space in good faith. most of us don’t come into fandom and oc communities preemptively guarded and ready to go looking for instances of plagiarism, and are far more likely to perceive things as incidental overlap than malicious theft even under circumstances where the latter is more likely. personally, it didn’t even initially set off alarm bells for me when i saw an oc with jestiny’s exact design plus color contacts and terf bangs also sharing prominent symbolism utilized in her story. 

my first instinct was to be welcoming and supportive in the spirit of celebrating that creative minds can find inspiration from the same sources. even as the symbolism began less and less to in any way resemble the context of said source material and more and more to resemble the version of the story i told, increasingly picking up elements that weren’t in the original but were sure as hell in my fic. in fact, i went as far as to offer resources on the source material in hopes that it would motivate the person to dig into it and find a way to make it their own, still hoping this was a case of overstepping taking inspiration at worst. 

it was after pushing my goodwill that far and giving an out only to then see another of my most well-known scenes copied down to my exact wording and pacing that i got the nerve to block. 

and i was naïve enough to think that would actually end it — hurt as i was by what had already happened, at least it was over. 

nope. 

even after blocking, i went on to see the scraps of another of my most well known scenes lazily repackaged. (i can forgive ripping off jestiny, but i draw the line at sullying poor daniel’s memory. he’s been through enough.) in fact, it continued incessantly enough that i have had multiple people independently send me screenshots of the same passage from within the past month commenting on how blatant it is. 

it should go without saying what a violation this was of my boundaries and my creative labor. every single aspect of jestiny’s story is deeply personal to me, both because of the extensive effort i have put into researching and crafting it and because of the pieces of my own experiences and emotions its founded in. 

but more than that, what sticks with me is the violation of the implicit trust and vulnerability that comes with choosing to share a creative work. i stretched my benefit of the doubt to its limits at the expense of my own mental health, i assumed good faith and tried to make space, and when i could no longer endure i quietly isolated myself rather than risk sowing discord or simply being a bummer in a fun time space. it made me no longer feel safe sharing works that were especially personal. the pain of the experience was one of the primary reason i put wildfire on indefinite publishing hiatus despite still loving the story and greatly enjoying continuing to write it in private. 

still, after the past few days and my own slow process of opening up, i am beginning to develop a renewed hope that we can act as a community and look out for each other. i still genuinely want to think we can by and large share creative space in good faith, and that people coming forward will leave us more ready to identify and deal with bad actors when they do pop up. 

and i have hope that i can heal and find ways to be open and vulnerable with my work again. that might mean soon thinking critically about how to curate my fandom experience in a way that will minimize having plagiarism thrown in my face, but for now that’s still a problem for future liz. 

for today, i just want to thank anyone who has read this far (y’all know i’m bad at shutting up). i’m still not ready to be super detailed in public, but if anyone wants to know more about the 5 ws and 1 h, you’re welcome to dm me — although i might be slow to respond right now, because i wasn’t being hyperbolic with the title. i am going to be on a camping trip in the swamp the next few days, and might not be online much. 

i am excited to have the time to unplug and reflect, and look forward to coming back recharged. until then, please know i am so thankful for all of you, from the bottom of my heart. 

[elzorton]

Some thoughts about Otohan Thull, the impact of chance on storytelling structures and themes in ttrpgs, and the catharsis of fulfilling story beats.

BIG SPOILERS FOR C3E91 OF CRITICAL ROLE UNDER THE CUT

You have been warned.

Hang with me here cause for the first half it could sound like i’m whining but i promise that this isn’t a negative or critical post. (also, i’m a little sleep deprived so if i’m not making sense just ignore me oops)

Okay, so a thing for me when it comes to ttrpgs compared with, let’s call it ”traditional” mediums of storytelling such as books or movies, is that the randomness that comes with dice rolls, chance and improv can sometimes leave certain story beats feeling… unfulfilled? Chance can lead to things getting resolved in a way that doesn’t feel impactful - or at least not as impactful as it could’ve been.

The death of grand villains such as Otohan Thull is a very good example of this. We expect villains to meet their demise dramatically, and thematically. As i was watching the latest episode, i found myself hoping that Laudna, Imogen or Orym would get the hdywtdt on Otohan. They are the ones who personally have been hurt by her the most, and therefore ”should” (according to my brain that is used to certain story structures ) get the final blow. If the story was told through a traditional storytelling medium, these are very likely scenarios. I’m not saying that it definitely would’ve happened like that, but I’m saying that however it would’ve happened, it would’ve been in a thematically impactful way.

In ttrpgs however, the thematically impactful death of a major villain isn’t guaranteed. The fact that some things aren’t gonna get resolved in the most fulfilling ways is something that we just have to accept. And i DO accept that - but it doesn’t stop the moments where it happens from feeling… incomplete.

WITH ALL THAT BEING SAID - here comes the part where it will stop sounding like i’m about to be whiny about the way it played out.

The outcome of this episode, the death of Otohan, DID feel fulfilling and impactful. It WAS impactful - and thematically relevant. Just not in the way that I expected. Which is exactly what I wish to experience around storytelling.

FCG’s sacrifice is heartbreaking and beautiful. It left me devastated and thankful. Otohan Thull has been so masterfully set up as a villain throughout the campaign. For their death to feel fulfilling, it kind of NEEDED to happen in a grand and impactful way. To me, she DESERVED a memorable death. The most obvious ways that could’ve come true is if Laudna, Imogen or Orym would’ve killed them. Laudna, she would kill the person who murdered her and further her spiral downward into Delilah’s embrace. Imogen and Orym, they would’ve gotten revenge on the person killing the people they loved the most.

Of course, those scenarios aren’t the only thematically fulfilling ways Otohan Thull could’ve died. What transpired this episode is absolutely, 100% meaningful and fulfilling. It just fulfilled another story beat then the ones I expected.

I have already seen a lot of posts highlighting 4SD discussions, previous conversations between characters and the growth of FCG as a character preceding this episode, where among other things FCG’s tendencies to want to sacrifice themselves, their journey towards the Changebringer and her philosophy of choosing your own path, and their growth towards viewing themselves as a living being with a soul. Therefor, I don’t feel the need to go into details of why their death felt thematically in line. We knew they were a ”ticking time bomb”. We knew they wanted to keep their friends safe with any means necessary.

What this means for the death of Otohan, is that it happened in a way that is bittersweet, cathartic and simultaneously expected and unexpected. THAT, is everything you could wish for in the death of a major villain. Otohan Thull has been one of my absolute favorite villains in all three campaigns. She has been brutal, involved and has kept the characters looking over their shoulders in fear everywhere they go. They deserved a grand death. They deserved something impactful, thematically relevant and unforgettable.

Otohan’s death will forever be etched into my brain. As Brennan said so beautifully: ”Why do we tell stories? To try to make sense of a world that can be terrifying and enormous”. This made sense. It was still terrifying. But it made sense. It was fulfilling.

TL;DR, ttrpgs don’t guarantee that major villains will meet their ends in thematically fulfilling ways. In this case, it WAS fulfilling and impactful. Just not in the way I, personally, expected.

[booasaur]

Unwell.

And another anon:

God damn Lioness had me going and then that. I clowned myself.

And another anon:

That was heartbreaking..... Cruz was used, Joe was used too to be very honest, they're all just pawns in The Game. All it will do is exactly like Cruz said, make another generation of terrorists, just because the rich wanted some more money. Aaliyah just sitting there - I wonder what's going on in her mind. I wish they'd been together one last time, if I was Cruz I'd wanted that for myself and Aaliyah was so willing because she wanted it for herself too. It's all so sad and nobody wins. They survived but at what cost? Aaliyah doesn't even know Cruz's real name, just her as Zara, a kind and honest friend. Does she know it was "Zara" that killed her father and fiancé? She will I guess. Is season 2 going to happen and would they continue with the story or just invent a new one? Would Aaliyah hate Cruz? Would Cruz come back to make amends (can she even?) or would she be so guilt-ridden she punishes herself instead?

Haha, yeahhhhh.

First: I was wrong. Have to say that up front, I was wrong about the ending! I really thought there'd be no way Cruz would be escaping at the end while Aaliyah was fine behind, I thought they simply wouldn't be able to resist having her die.

I should probably really do something about my pessimism because at first, I was operating on the assumption that Aaliyah was left alive to be part of next season and since that "creating the next generation of terrorists" line was immediately followed by a jump to Aaliyah putting together the pieces, I was like, oh, she's going to be the next big bad, so they've only delayed her death while also making her a terrorist. Hah, you can imagine how I felt about THAT.

But reading other people's reactions, I guess I only assumed this same set of characters would return and it might be a different mission led by Joe, since Zoe Saldana has indicated she's returning (if there's another season), or just, it could be something still continuing this overall mission...? I dunno, it felt kind of not only complete, but unnecessary? It all felt kind of unnecessary and pointless at the end, so then it's like, what's the point of the show at all? Like you said, third anon, it's just game pieces being moved around, how are we going to take the next thing seriously? Do it or not, it's just dollar signs to some people. Actually, I did admire that a bit, tbh, acknowledging for this particular audience what the war on terror really is, and also how so many US actions actually just create more terrorists.

Anyway, if this is the end of Cruz and Aaliyah's story, that is for SURE heartbreaking. One of the things I've always hated about BYGs it that they aside from a usually undeserved and too-early death for the character, it's also cutting short their story onsreen, and well, this might be another way of doing that. I'm not even sure what'll happen to Aaliyah, her family will blame her and limit her even more, and she was already feeling so trapped and as if nobody cared about her. And the one person who does, who really, really does, she'll think was just using her.

Tbh, I admire Cruz more for not going there that last time even as much as she wanted to, because with everything, that wouldn't have been fair to Aaliyah, to have the woman she slept with just minutes ago killing her dad and running off. In fact, I wonder, with how obvious Cruz was being, if Aaliyah will eventually realize at least some of it was real for her. She'll find out a lot about her, anyway, since Ehsan left it on his computer before running off.

My ultimate feelings about this really depend on how the next season's planned to go. Is this truly it for these two? Then I'm not sure I hate that, if it's left to our imagination what might happen, because I just don't think the Cruz we've seen wouldn't at least try to reach out to her. I could see her nobly staying away if it's what would help Aaliyah, but as it is, Aaliyah's stuck in a pretty tough spot!

But still, this IS better than a BYG to me because story has at least the potential to continue, one way or another. Deaths are so final. This reminds me of the s2 finale and hiatus for The 100, which, ignore what happened in s3, lol, but letting Lexa leave and then the fandom waiting to hear if she'd return. Both still alive, there are a lot of ways to come back from that.

[dearduende]

恋の予感 (koi no yokan)

恋の予感

(n.) “premonition of love”;

the feeling of knowing that you will soon fall in love with the person you have just met.

a part of me knew

as soon as I saw you

from across the room,

how at a glance do we read

past and presence and future maybes

like a déjà-vu feeling of our rendezvous

yet to materialize

but maybe it’s already happened

somewhere, somehow in our past lives

our 인연 (inyeon) pulling

or as we call it: 姻緣 (jan1 jyun4)

our fated strings overlapping

for the nth time as we dance

for the first time in this reincarnation

how I knew as soon as you bent

your mouth to my ear, your voice

resonating deep in my heart space

how familiar it felt, our energies vibrating,

our electrons rubbing up and sparking,

the ease of falling into rhythm together

and riding on the same wavelength.

maybe the premonition of love

is a recognition of our entanglements

past and future inevitably colliding

and merging into each other

like a slow motion car crash

I can’t take my eyes off of

we’re set on our trajectories

to hurl right into each other,

I only hope that we both survive.

and now in the aftermath

we have spun off into our own orbits

and I’m left in my wreckage back at home

longing, steeped in saudade,

la douleur exquise—the exquisite pain

or wanting someone you cannot have.

the viraag, the anguish of separation:

at least two flights each way

(and almost a thousand USD)

and a 9 hour time difference.

if only to feel the cafuné,

to run my fingers through your hair

as we wake to each other in your hotel room

again and again falling into each other

but that moment has passed

and to hold on or to try to return

might be cavoli riscaldati

and try as we might to resuscitate,

boiling the cabbage does not

bring it back to life.

I’ll tend to my sehnsucht

with sad songs and metaphor,

drawing from the poets and linguists

and even the Buddhists

I borrow from all these languages

to try to hold this thing I cannot name.

I remind myself

the most heartbreaking words:

(from Fleabag, the masterpiece)

“I love you.”

“It will pass.”

until one day

this

whatever it is

fades and frays

into разлюбить

(razliubit).

[snorlaxlovesme]

thoughts and feelings about the Netflix's Live Action Avatar, now that I've finished:

overall, net positive! as i said in my previous post about the first 3 episodes [x], i'm someone who goes into adaptations with minimal expectations, treating it more like fanfiction, so I can spend more time enjoying myself than being a butthurt baby, so with that in mind i can say that I enjoyed myself a lot! there are episodes that i'm actually really excited to rewatch (5 and 6 are bangers and i won't be told otherwise)

i'm not going to lie and claim that any of the actors will be winning Daytime Emmys, but there were a few standout performances for me at least:

-Zuko was incredible. i love the way this version leaned into Zuko's desperation to capture the Avatar, because now he finally had a real chance of being able to come home after all these years. his acting pre- and post-Agni Kai in the flashbacks felt so sincere. his optimism was adorable before the war meeting and his shattered expression after Ozai banished him was fucking heartbreaking.

-i really loved the boy who played Aang. he was so charming and cute! and i think as the episodes went along he gradually got better at displaying more subtle emotion. for such a young child actor i thought he was doing amazing

-Sokka's actor was putting in work in the back half! i was impressed! the first half of the show I was pretty neutral about Sokka's acting but the more development he got the more I appreciated what his actor was bringing to the table. i think he just needed to be paired with the right acting partners in a scene to bring out the best of his abilities. Katara didn't give him much to work off of, but his scenes with Sai and Yue really hit

-Zhao was great too! they really re-worked his character to be a lot more important from the jump and i loved seeing how underhanded he was being during all of Zuko's quest. normally seeing Zhao on-screen just annoys me but i loved this version and how patronizing he was to Zuko

-idk man every time Gyatso was on screen I was crying. that's just how it is. every time i saw his face it felt like a warm hug

i think the weird part of this adaptation is that the parts that were adapted were pretty mid (or sometimes just bad) in a lot of cases, but whenever they added in their own original ideas it really shined! i feel like that's not the case with a lot of adaptation, people want to see what they know, but honestly if they added in more of their own original writing in s2 I would not be mad because i loved what these writers were bringing to the table (for the most part)

-i've already said that the way they structured ep 1 to include the start of the war was awesome. that was a cool change to show the audience from the jump that they weren't planning on boring everyone with a one-to-one(but worse) adaptation. it also set the tone really well bc my GOD do firebenders be setting people on fire in this show

-big fan of the early inclusion of Kyoshi and the idea that Aang can only convene with past Avatars at their temples. that was not a Hard Rule in the original and it always felt weird to me that sometimes he needed to be at a certain place on a certain day to communicate with his past lives but then in the finale he just had to meditate wherever he was. but yeah, they used Kyoshi lore from the novels and did indeed lose my mind about it

-Zuko and the 41st division. that was SUCH a cool storyline that was woven in starting at episode ONE and i was genuinely impressed with how hard it hit. i didn't see that coming and it had me CRYINGGGG. so yeah, BIG thumbs up for that original storyline. and also they inclusion of the post-Agni Kai Zuko recovering in the hospital and getting banished for claiming that maybe the weak just need the opportunity to get strong. heartbreaking, devastating on its own (Zuko's actor truly was killing me, i loved him so much) but once we see Zuko and Azula start going toe-to-toe next season that line will hurt me even more

-the bonding moment about calligraphy between Aang and Zuko was a really good bait and switch. in the original Blue Spirit episode Zuko didn't talk to Aang at all before firing at him. i like that i was expecting it to play out the same way as before but instead they had a moment of connection before Aang triggered Zuko and all potential for empathy was lost.

-which seems like a good time to address Zuko's character. i want to be clear when i say that i liked something because it was different from the original, it doesn't mean that i like it BETTER than the original. i simply think the new version is fun fanfiction that was written better than i expected. so when i say i like how they dealt with Zuko's obsession with honor, i'm in no way implying it's superior to the original. simply a good different

-anyways. in the original, Zuko's obsession with honor is fully connected to his need to be wanted by his father again. OZAI is the only one who can restore it, and it can only be restored by completing an impossible task for him. in the Netflix version it almost seems like Zuko's honor is tied to the disillusion that the Fire Nation itself is honorable. the bit about Lieutenant...Yi? sorry i'm getting his name wrong, but Lieutenant Yi gossiping about a superior officer, Zuko's disbelief that the Fire Nation would ever use such underhanded tactics like planting spies in Omashu, it was clear to me that Zuko bought into a rigid sense of morality and honor when it came to the Fire Nation. i hope we see more of that in s2 so that we can see Zuko's world truly rocked when he and Iroh become refugees

-Katara being hailed as a master was very sweet! i wish she would have gotten SOME training from Paku (could still happen at the start of book 2) but I did enjoy that during the Siege of the North that she got her own little battalion to command bc she was seen as worth warrior

-OH and I love how they explored Sokka's character. again, them taking out Sokka's blatant sexism didn't bother me, so i was happy to see that in taking that out they DID work hard to make Sokka's character motivations rich and meaningful. having him have the same complex about being a lacking warrior as the original cartoon but with the added twist of overhearing his dad's harsh words about his abilities really added something to Sokka's insecurities. i loved the inclusion of Sai encouraging Sokka to become an engineer because it was clear how much that meant to him. considering in the cartoon he does become a pretty badass warrior (while still being mainly an Idea Guy) i wonder how this storyline will play out later. if he'll try harder to fit into the warrior box he thinks he belongs in or if he'll blatantly begin to reject that role for himself and identify more heavily with his engineer side

-the cave of two lovers had me worried for a second because Sokka and Katara were paired together for that and im like UMMM so i thought it was pretty funny how they reinterpreted "love is brightest in the dark" in that scene. not as good as the original, obviously, but a funny reinterpretation that i didn't hate

i probably have more to say on the additions but this is getting long so i think it's time to get to some criticisms. this show was not perfect by any means and i have several gripes with it so i might as well get that out now

-WAIT first i must say that a lot of the bending looked phenomenal. particularly Zuko and Aang's bending. both actors (and their stunt doubles) were great martial artists and the fire effects and air effects were done really well. i was really worried about how they'd adapt airbending (since air is invisible) and they did a great job adding in dust cloud effects and making sure the props in the scene moved they like would if they were blasted by air

-AND i must emphasize that i was not mad at them chopping up storylines and mixing them together. the Mechanist/Jet plotlines had similar themes of seemingly Good People doing unethical things for what they believed to be a good cause, so putting them in the same episode made sense to me. and having Sokka and Katara getting spirited away and caught up in that mist (a fun LOK reference that time, i loved the easter eggs) and then captured by Koh was a good way to separate them from Aang the Blue Spirit arc could take place. that also made sense to me. people who get mad about the re-shuffling of episodes frustrate me to no end.

okay, now onto critique:

-unfortunately, Iroh was a giant flop. i don't know how else to say it. i didn't really like any part of him, from his costuming to his writing to his acting. something about him felt like he was plucked out of a campy low-budget stage play and just thrown into this show while only know his campy stage play lines. both Zuko and Zhao give pretty grounded, emotional performances and Iroh is SO jarring by comparison when he's in the same room as them acting like a caricature of himself for no reason. his wig was terrible, i wish they had made it more flowy because it stayed the same shape and position the whole time, he used the WEIRDEST announcer voice the whole time (like why are you using a voice?? no one else is using a voice??), and his robes seemed out of place when everyone else was wearing leather armor. and they had a moment in episode 4 where an Earth Kingdom soldier really laid into him because back when Iroh was a general he was responsible for the death of Earth Kingdom soldier's brother. i was interested to see this bc we BARELY get to see Iroh's Bad Side in the cartoon and i was curious to see where the live action would go with it. but it ended with Earth Kingdom soldier slugging Iroh or slapping his face or something and Iroh made some snoody remark about how war changes people, and he WASN'T talking about himself. like bro this man just told you you COOKED his brother alive he has earned the right to slug you, what are you talking about! i was expecting remorse, or at the very least a solemn look of guilt over the person Iroh once was, but nothing. it was bad. obviously having the iconic Uncle Iroh be so terrible is a huge mark against the show. i simply cannot defend that

-circling back to Iroh's wig. well. the hair and make-up department went out of their way to make important characters look like their cartoon counterparts and that was not always beneficial. why did Yue look like she was from Whoville. who okayed that.

-many people have already pointed it out, but it was weird in ep 1 that Aang's decision to leave was because he needed to clear his head, not because he was running away from his responsibilities. i have no idea why they made this change, unless the reason was to have every single person (including past Avatars) dog on Aang for not being around during the past 100 years. but even that doesn't hit the same bc it truly wasn't his fault! he went for a drive and got caught in a storm! he intended to be back in a few hours! idk that change didn't make sense to me. i know Aang felt guilt regardless but the guilt was supposed to be from the intentionality of Aang running away

-the way Katara broke Aang out of the iceberg was weird?? she wasn't angry at Sokka for his sexism, but she could have been angry at him for SOMETHING that caused her bending to grow out of control. or at the very least when she was bending the canoe towards her she could have done a sharp pulling motion towards her that ended with her arms behind her, therefore forming the cracks in the ice (kind of a callback to how in the pilot Katara could really only waterbend backwards at first). instead her hands were fully facing forward and she was gently bending in front of her and that led to the ice sphere exploding behind her. its been bothering me. whyyy

-character-wise, Katara was pretty one-note. like the addition of her guilt for getting her mom killed with her subpar waterbending, while not bad, didn't make up for how much she DIDN'T have going on. it felt like they toned down a lot of Katara's character strengths AND flaws to give Sokka more room to arc, then shoved all of Katara's development into the last 2 episodes. they didn't show much of her resilient hope in the face of adversity or rage towards injustice or how petty she could be. part of this could be her actor, who i won't dog on because she is a child actor who will get better with time, but i don't think the flimsy writing of her did her any favors

-score wasn't nearly as good as Jeremy Zuckerman/The Track Team's. remixing some of the A:TLA's score doesn't make up for the fact that all the original scoring in this adaptation was flat by comparison

-Bumi's whole thing was....weird. i didn't mind at first that they speedran through his reveal because i don't think there's a point to try and surprise the three people who haven't seen the original. 99% of the audience knew the King was Bumi, so I didn't see any problem with that. but the set-up flashback of Bumi lasted like 10 seconds and basically just showed him snort. it didn't give you a reason to get attached to him as Aang's past friend. and his current actions didn't help at all. the acting was very Michael Meyer's Cat in the Hat-esque. so. uh. SCARY AND OFFPUTTING. was not a fan of that all. and having him do a few random goofy tests for Aang AFTER already knowing his identity felt...weird? like what's the point of these now? and then having the reveal that he's NOT kooky, he genuinely IS pissed at Aang for being gone, well. hmm. it's not a bad idea in theory. i liked the concept of having someone FROM THIS TIMELINE (looking at you, Kyoshi, Roku, and Kuruk, and your unjustified rage toward Aang) be upset at Aang for leaving the world in such a state of imbalance. having Bumi be like DO YOU KNOW ALL THE SHIT I'VE HAD TO DEAL WITH SINCE THE WORLD HAS HAD NO AVATAR, was an interesting line of thought i could have rocked with, butttt.....idk man. it's BUMI. he's supposed to be a living memory of Aang's past to give him comfort and wisdom! it hurt to see this version be so cruel to Aang and basically force him to try to kill him just to prove a point. i would have rather had them write out Bumi altogether and use that episode for something else than to smear his name like that

-i'm tentatively alright with Azula's plotline right now. the Zuko line "Azula was born lucky, I was lucky to be born" is really essential to how their rivalry worked in the cartoon. Azula was a cold-hearted prodigy while Zuko was compassionate boy but average bender. i liked the idea of showing how Ozai intentionally pitted his children against each other. i liked seeing Azula's moment of defiance where she claims she's DONE being tested because she know how good her abilities are. i liked seeing the origin of her lighting bending. all of those were cool fanfiction. the thing that worries me is that we, the audience, have already seen Azula's doubt in herself, something we weren't privy to until the very end of the series. plus showing how hard Azula trains kind of undercuts the fact that Zuko is supposed to think he can't measure up to her because of her natural abilities that he DOESN'T have. they DID plant the seed to Zuko that Azula was the one backing Zhao the whole time, so we do have some of their rivalry primed to go. but the rivalry in the original is extremely one-sided. it will be odd to see Azula fighting just as hard to earn Ozai's affection, because intrinsically she should think that game was won a long time ago. so yeah. i'm not mad about it YET, just interested to see how it plays out

and then there are little nitpicks that could be resolved in season 2, should it get picked up again

-Aang not learning any waterbending or burning Katara with firebending can be woven into the early eps of season 2 before Toph's introduction

-the gaang's chemistry will only grow stronger with time. as the cast becomes better friends, as the kids become better actors with age, and considering they don't separate much in s2, i have faith that will iron itself out naturally

-tbh im sure there are more but this is so long i'm fizzling out. i'm fading. i must stop.

but yeah! good and bad! there's lots to unpack but in general i think it was fun. i'm excited for more.

[lastontheboat]

Fandom creators self rec game! Choose five favourites from your own creations (and tell me why, if you like!), then pass on to at least five other people. I'd love to hear what you're proudest of.

Thank you @tackytigerfic for providing me an opportunity for navel-gazing! I enjoyed reading about your own favourites; I find it super interesting to see what other creators value about their works.

Per my last letter (I hope you choke on it)

This is my favourite completed fic for a number of reasons:

1. I had always wanted to try writing an epistolary

2. I had always wanted to try collaborating on a fic with a friend

3. The writing process was an absolute joy

It feels like a distillation of many of my favourite things, but unlike many fics the creation process didn't involve tearing my hair out trying to make it do what I wanted. Whenever I'd get stuck, I'd just close the document and go to bed, then when I woke up the next morning @fluxweeed would have added several new scenes that set my brain on fire. It was an absolutely magical experience for me, and I'm extremely fond of the end result. This is probably the fic of mine that I've re-read the most, and it delights me every time!

Podfic of Stop All The Clocks, by firethesound

I've got a lot of podfics to choose from, but this is one that I'm particularly proud of. The original fic is imprinted on my soul, but the thing that sticks with me more than the actual plot is the sensation of reading it and feeling my heart break over and over.

Making podfics is a very personal craft for me. It's an investment of my time, and I generally choose ones to record that I strongly associate with a particular first-time reading experience. This was my sixth large podfic project, and I really wanted my reading to amplify the heartbreak that's already present in the text. It was a much more emotional recording and editing process than most of my podfics, but it's also the only one I've listened to entirely after releasing it.

I'm extremely fond of every listener who has taken the plunge and commented about their experience of it, and completely understand everyone who has been like "I don't fuck with that fic. You couldn't pay me to listen it."

body electric

This is the first fic I can recall writing that was entirely driven by a feeling. I remember being consumed by the idea of that spark between Harry and Draco, of them needing to feed it and hold it but being unable to act upon it. I was between jobs and had a lot of time to myself, and I wrote this fic in a fugue state over the space of two days. I had never experienced a writing process so feverish before, and I don't know if I will again.

I also need to shout out the beta feedback I got from @zaharya on this one, whose very insightful comments about the passage of time in the second chapter led to me adding a bunch of my favourite lines to it:

“I want to bend you over this table,” he says, panting now. “I want you under me, here in my workshop. You’ll leave here and every time you smell wood shavings you’ll think of me.” “I already do,” Malfoy says, his voice cracking.

Podfic of If The Fates Allow, by saras_girl

I spend a lot of time listening to audiobooks these days, and I really appreciate being able to consume so many stories while driving or cooking. For me, recording a podfic is about giving others the opportunity to experience some of my favourite fics, and trying to capture some of what they mean to me in my voicing.

saras_girls fics hold a very special place in my heart, and this one is my absolute favourite of hers. As a podfic, the biggest challenge here was dealing with the ensemble cast—it stretched the limits of unique voices I could do without them sounding forced, but it was also exciting trying to keep the voices consistent across 25 chapters.

the spirit is willing (the flesh is weak)

This is the newest fic that I finished (the only one so far in 2023), but I haven't made too much noise about it on here because it's attached to my alt account. This one started out as a concept that wouldn't leave me alone (Bill/Ginny fuck or die), but it's also another data point in my exploration of what it's like to write smut.

I still don't think it comes naturally to me, whatever that means—I'm much more comfortable keeping my writing to Teen, but I'm very satisfied with how this fic achieves what I set out to do with it. It was a stretch, but a good stretch!

[flowercrown-bard]

the results are in! this choose your own adventure-esque fic is going to be a somewhat lighthearted Geraskier fic set at a masquerade

For some reason I can’t add the poll to this post, so at the end of the chapter, there will be a link to the poll. sorry for making this more complicated than probably necessary

wc: 1429

AO3

'Choose wisely', said the fool (part 1)

“This is unbelievable!” Jaskier snatched the parchment out of Geralt’s hands, skimming its contents, though he already knew what they were. The wax seal showing an intricate rose design had revealed it all. “How did you do it?”

“Hm?” Geralt folded his arms and lifted an eyebrow in amusement, as he watched Jaskier fret over the letter.

“Oh, don’t you hmm me,” Jaskier said petulantly, though his heart skipped a beat at the little smile Geralt quirked. Even after years of friendship, he still couldn’t get enough of Geralt’s teasing tone and the easy familiarity with which the witcher had started treating him once he had gotten used to the idea that Jaskier genuinely wanted to be his friend. And it was true. Jaskier did love being friends with him, travelling beside him, sharing drinks and laughs as friends were wont to do. There was just the tiny detail that a not-so-secret part of him wanted to have something else with Geralt as well. As much as Jaskier told himself he was satisfied with sharing a bed with Geralt out of convenience, he found himself wishing that he were allowed to sling an arm around Geralt’s waist and pull him closer, so he could press his head between his shoulder blades and fall asleep listening to his slow heartbeat or wake him up with a kiss. Gods, how he wanted to kiss him.

He coughed, shaking those thoughts off. He could deal with them later. Or never. That would also be acceptable. For now, he had other priorities. Namely -

“How, by the mighty clap of Melitele’s arsecheeks, did you manage to get invited to Duchess Ruta’s betrothal feast? And I - the Continent’s greatest and most famous bard - did not?”

Geralt’s lips twitched.

“Maybe your infamy for sleeping with engaged people isn’t very helpful.”

“Well, neither should your infamy for claiming the law of surprise at Pavetta’s betrothal feast be. And yet…” He smacked the invitation with one hand, creating a satisfyingly dramatic sound. “Maybe she hadn’t heard about that.”

Jaskier let out a disbelieving huff. He couldn’t fathom the idea of any noble who was worth their salt - which, admittedly, weren’t a lot- hadn’t heard about the disaster that had happened in Cintra. Not least of all, because it had made for a fantastic story. A cursed knight, a witcher sparing a monster and therefore ensuring that love won out in the end? Really, what was not to love? Jaskier just had to put that in a ballad and the song had spread across the Continent like a wildfire.

“Unbelievable,” Jaskier said again, mostly in hopes of seeing Geralt grin once more. As much as he acted like a slighted lover, Jaskier was proud of his friend. The Geralt from a couple of years ago would have never been even considered as a guest to a noble’s feast. The only thing less likely than that was the possibility of Geralt actually accepting.

“If you’re so mad about it, I take it you’re not coming?” Geralt asked nonchalantly and turned to his bags to pull out his alchemy set, clinking the bottles together.

“I repeat myself.” Jaskier waved the parchment through the air, despite Geralt not looking at him. “I wasn’t lucky enough to be invited.”

“Read the last line.”

With a frown, Jaskier did as he was bid. “Please be aware that you may bring no more than one additional guest with you, if you so wish.” His mouth dropped open. “Geralt, are you saying what I think you’re saying? Because if you’re not, I shall write a heartbreaking ballad about the cruelty of one Geralt of Rivia for toying with my hope.”

Geralt snorted and rolled his eyes at Jaskier’s dramatics.

“I wouldn’t ever hear the end of it if I didn't take you."

"You won't hear the end of it if you take me either,” Jaskier warned. “You know I'll make a song out of it, right?"

"I know." Geralt lowered his head as he sorted through his bottles, making his hair fall down and obscure his features. Still, Jaskier was sure he could see the hint of a smile. "It sounded like the sort of thing you'd like."

Jaskier's heart fluttered like a humming bird's wings.

"And exactly like the sort of thing you hate." He dropped the pretence of being affronted. Softly, he added, "You'd go there for me?"

Geralt shrugged. "Rich people have the best alcohol and food. Also, it's a masquerade. People won't bother me if they don't recognize me." He titled his head just enough that Jaskier could see the mischievous glint in his eyes. "And if they don't recognize you, then I don't have to look out for any cuckolds seeking revenge."

Jaskier bit his lip to stop himself from making a quip about how his face wasn't the only recognizable part of him. He didn't need to challenge his luck that much. Who knew when Geralt would offer to take him to a ball again?

"I'd love to go with you."

"Hmm." Geralt sounded pleased and for some reason relieved, as if there had ever been a chance that Jaskier wouldn't accept the invitation. "You better buy a mask then."

Jaskier lit up. He bounced on his heels.

"What are you going as? Oh! We could match!"

Geralt snorted. "How about we don't tell each other and see if we still recognize each other at the ball?"

Jaskier lifted his brows and let his eyes roam pointedly over the bulk of Geralt's shoulders and his very recognisable white hair.

"Sure," he said, drawing out the word. "Say, that's not just an excuse because you don't have a mask yet, is it?"

"Of course not."

"Liar." Jaskier grinned. "But fine. Challenge accepted. I could recognise you by your horse-smell alone. Speaking of which," he wrinkled his nose. "I'll leave you to your stinky alchemy. I don't need to watch you crush drowner brains again."

"Pity," Geralt said drily. "Whatever should i do without you to distract me."

"Oh, I'm distracting you?" Jaskier teased. "Did you just admit you think I'm pretty?"

Geralt grunted, but didn't deny it.

Jaskier very much didn't flee from the room so that Geralt wouldn't hear his heart picking up speed. He simply was eager to find a suitable mask to wear to the ball.

As he made his way to the heart of the town, he was already coming up with ideas. Granted, none of them would do any good at hiding his identity from Geralt, but he was well aware that that would be impossible anyway, what with Geralt being able to pick out the sound of his heartbeat in a crowd. No, Jaskier had a different goal in mind with his mask.

The first idea he had was perhaps the most obvious one. If he got a mask that looked like a wolf, he would be matching Geralt, even if Geralt had a differently themed mask. Everyone would know that he was the White Wolf’s companion. The idea of wearing something that undeniably marked him as belonging to Geralt made his heart beat faster and his cheeks heat up.

Then again, there were other options. It was a silly idea, of course, but… what if Jaskier went all out and got a really good disguise? He was sure that the troupe of actors he had chatted with earlier that day would let him borrow some of their costumes and props. Some cheap charm to change his eye colour to look more yellow, two prop swords, some light armour, maybe a wig… It wouldn't take much to make him look like a witcher. Geralt would be so annoyed but it would be so much fun, if only to see his reaction. Jaskier had to giggle just imagining it: following Geralt around with an exaggerated frown and artificially deep voice to imitate him. It would be hilarious!

But maybe annoying Geralt wasn't the right thing to do. After all, he had been kind enough to invite Jaskier along. Jaskier shouldn't punish him for that by teasing him. Maybe he should instead strive to make Geralt smile. And there was one thing that without fail would always make him smile: Horses. Jaskier would look absolutely terrible in a horse mask, but a little public humiliation would be worth it if it meant seeing Geralt light up at the sight of him and maybe even laugh a little, if Jaskier was lucky.  

The more he thought about it, the harder the choice became.

make the choice for Jaskier here

tagging: @fingons-rad-harp @claracaboozle @thequeeninyellowlace @

[burningtacozombie]

random Mayans thoughts, episode 5x03 edition:

- the scene between Miguel and Felipe would have worked perfectly without the retcon of Felipe apparently knowing the truth all those years. Dita wrote him letters after he broke up with her, we saw him read them, he could have given those to Miguel and it would have been fine. 

- Miguel and Cristobal own my heart forever. I love them so much, they are so fucking adorable I could cry. and maybe I did.

- Angel is trying so hard to do his best as a father, it's honestly so sweet. after having been a piece of shit last season, he's likable again and I'm glad about it. also, forget what I said last week about him not knowing that Felipe knew Adelita's father. Angel knows, Felipe told him in season 2. I just forgot about that, lol.

- same goes for Bishop, he's trying hard and becomes likable again. Maggie is good for him, hopefully he doesn't screw it up. the dad conversation between Angel and him was pretty heartbreaking.

- look at all these men wanting to be good fathers, it's a clear theme in the episode.

- Emily gonna try another escape attempt, huh? because the first time worked out so well for her. and obviously she ran to EZ. fucking again. girlie can't even get her own unmarked car but thinks she can get away from Miguel and the babysitters he put on her. I'm waiting for the day she kills herself just to get away from him for good.

- EZ, oh dear god someone put this man in a hug yourself jacket. that bonehead is gonna get them all dead. I don't even know what more to say about that guy.

- the bar girls trying to set up Nestor and Jess is so fucking weird. there's nothing between them. nothing, except that Nestor knows she's a traitor, or at the very least he suspects something isn’t right.

- Jess, her sister and Terry all need to go. I can't stand any of them.

- Diaz was annoying at first with Marcus and their "good old times" talk but he made a valid point. Marcus is out, he needs to leave the dying to the rest of them and instead focus on his pregnant lady and the children they already have. his poor daughter saying "you're missing it" and he didn't even seem to care...

- correcting myself here, not all of the guys try or even want to be good fathers. shame on you, Alvarez.

- Potter is back, and he's as annoying as ever. that man makes me angry like no other, the way he talks makes me nauseous. he needs to get got as well.

- Creeper lost his limp real fast when he walked out in the yard so no one would see him be weak. he better be making it out alive. he told Hank that there's a rat in the club, while Kody/Katie has now KJ's files. looks like we were onto something last week, EZ keeps looking better and better for it...

- question on the side, what happened to the other guy Isaac let live when he burned Manny alive last season? there’s a lose end and I don’t know where to put it.

[piedpiperslists]

JJK: Soulmates AU

List of all Jungkook fics under 'Soulmates' AU:

* ² - two shots s - contains smut

* Last updated: 18/02/2024

D R A B B L E S

[drabble] by 1kook friends to lovers Summary: Your soulmate smells like your favorite food and Jungkook is too dumb to make the connection.

[drabble] by kidguk Summary: “I’m never letting you out of my sight ever again.”

[drabble] by kidguk Summary: Good love will find me.

[drabble] by kidguk reincarnation au Summary: You’ve got a pocketful of reasons why (you’re here tonight).

Heartbeat by serinic angst Summary: A world where you can hear your soulmate's heartbeat.

“I’ll wait.” by seoulnotes princess!reader, reincarnation au

Is It Just A Dream? by tinylint strangers to lovers, idol au Summary: Jungkook keeps seeing a face in his dreams - but does he believe in soulmates?

Lost (Myself) & Found (You) by taephilia Summary: Based off of 'Kimi No Na Wa'.

* Mine by sugaurora angst, dragon!Jungkook Summary: Though you may fight against the inescapable bond between you and your mate Jungkook, it’s only as the lights are leaving your eyes that you realize: you truly never want to be without him.

O N E S H O T S

All’s Fair by kimvtae s wc~13k / ft KTH, boyfriend!Taehyung, college au, polyamory au Summary: They say soul mates get their marks on the same day, and you’ve been dating Taehyung for almost four years now, but it isn’t his name that shows up on your wrist. It’s Jeon Jungkook’s, also known as your least favorite person in the world.

Dumb Pink Bunny (I Love You So) by jinjikook wc~8k / strangers to lovers Summary: When you awoke with a mysterious tattoo on your side, you had to figure out where it came from. Unfortunately, life had other plans for you as you were forced to put the hunt on hold to work your day job. Luckily, fate has something in store for you while you’re there.

Falling by starshapedkookie s wc~31.4k / college au Summary: soulmate (noun): a person who is bound to another through the strongest level of emotional and physical connection. one is given a name on the body upon 18 years of age and any transgressions against the laws of soul-bonding will not occur without harm.

Habits of a Broken Heart by softykooky wc~26.3k / art student!Jungkook, English student!reader, subtle enemies to lovers Summary: Jungkook and you are soulmates. So says the matching crescent moons on both your wrists. However, things are never as easy as they seem, and you are quick to learn that falling in love with someone who does not believe in love is a one-way ticket to heartbreak. Alternatively, “you still are, you know. Worth it.” You release a shaky breath. “but I was stupid to think that I am too.”

How Long Will We Fall by jiminrings wc~14k / friends to lovers Summary: If it’s fate, it should already be set onto your skin — that’s why Jungkook’s initials are already on your finger. He’s always there for you, but not only for you. If you’re his fate, he’d rather not have it. Alternatively, Jungkook’s your soulmate, but he doesn’t want to be.

Moonlight by yeoldontknow wc~7.8k / friends to lovers Summary: You’ve been friends with Jungkook all your life, curious about one another’s soulmates in youth only to be jaded by the thought in adulthood. Eventually, you realize you’ve loved him through and beyond the idea, and decide that fate doesn’t get a say in who you choose.

Mountebank by kidguk wc~3.5k Summary: Soulmate AU featuring Jimin, in which you’ve been waking up next to your soul-enemy and running from your soul-mate. Figure that mess out, will you?

The Lucky Ones by today-we-will-survive wc~19k / university au

When Two Worlds Crash Together by army-author wc~2.6k / angst, parallel universes au

Written in the Stars by jcwriting wc~10.4k / werewolf au Summary: Being soulmates with a werewolf? Pretty easy. Being Jungkook’s soulmate? The easiest thing in the world. There’s only one teensy tiny problem. He doesn’t want to fuck you.

T W O S H O T S / S E R I E S

Make You Mine ² by colormepurplex2 s enemies to lovers, A/B/O au Summary: Alphas might rule the world, but Jungkook finds himself being ruled by the need to make you his.Omegas are rare, precious, and pliant. At least, most are. When you present late, well into your twenties, you’re already set in your headstrong ways; a challenge even for a commanding alpha like Jungkook. Add to that the centuries-long feud between your families and the last thing anyone expected was for him to claim you as his soulmate.

Redefining Destiny by threeletterslife enemies to lovers Summary: You were convinced you were in love with him. A former member of the mafia in the states, that is. It was true love. Destiny. Until one day you wake up with a memory lapse; then that love is replaced with hatred. The thought of marriage is substituted with revenge. If your love with Jeon Jungkook really was destiny, you’d fall head over heels in love again. But if only he weren’t such a hot, goading asshole.

[qelattes]

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo

Some of my favorite notes:

“I resolve once again that the answer is somewhere in the middle”

“But I’m pretty sure that’s simply hindsight bias. I’m seeing what I want to see, based on how i know it all turns out”

“I need to know that you will listen to exactly what I’m trying to tell you and not place your own assumptions into my story”

“The part where you accept the apology because it’s easier than addressing the root of the problem”

“Praise is just like an addiction. The more you get it, the more of it you just to stay even”

“Sometimes I hated myself for wanting him, for finding myself brightening up when his attention was on me, for still needing his approval”

“It just goes to show that money can’t buy happiness”

“You could desire someone even when you don’t like him, that you can desire someone especially when you don’t like him”

“But intimacy is about truth. When you realize you can tell someone your truth, when you can show yourself to them, when you stand in front of them bare and their response is “You’re safe with me” —that’s intimacy.”

“I’m just saying it’s not so great being loved for something you didn’t do”

“Please never forget that the sun rises and sets with your smile. At least to me it does. You’re the only thing on this planet worth worshipping”

“Already realizing that no amount would ever really be enough”

“But no medium can capture what is is to be in someone’s presence, certainly not someone like her. Someone who makes you feel important simply because she’s choosing to look at you”

“Sometimes things happen so quickly you aren’t sure when you even realized they were about to begin”

“It's always been fascinating to me how things can be simultaneously true and false, how people can be good and bad all in one, how someone can love you in a way that is beautifully selfless while serving themselves ruthlessly.”

“We all can’t go around treating people like dog shit and then expecting that a simple I’m sorry erases it.”

“Women have sex for intikacy. Men have sex for pleasure.”

“Guilt is a feeling I’ve never made much peace with”

“I hurt her with these tiny scratches, day after day. And then I got surprised when it left a wound too big to heal.”

“I’d rather survive it than never feel it.”

“I knew he was always doing the very best he could with the pain he felt at any given moment. And this, however tragic, had been the best he could do”

“I missed the only man I’d ever loved with any lasting meaning”

“Those things would come in time.”

“He never replaced Harry. No one could. But he did ease the pain, a little bit.”

“Connor began to trust that the world was a reasonably safe place to open your heart to. knew the wounds of losing her father would never truly heal, that scar tissue was forming all through her high school years.”

“No matter how perfect the day seemed, there was kne ache looking over us night after night”

“We both knew she was making a promise she couldn’t keep.”

“I couldn’t stand the thought of losing her again, losing her in a deeper way than I’d ever lost her before.”

“I have been married seven times, and never once has it felt half as right as this. I think that loving you has been the truest thing about me.”

“I had been my truest self, searching for the help of my best friend to ease the pain of the loss of my lover.”

“I really loved having someone look out for me, having someone to look out”

“I think I’d be willing to omit the truth from public knowledge in the interest of the happiness and sanity of a person I love dearly.”

“she loved Celia in a way that was in turns breathtaking and heartbreaking.”

“I promise that I will repay the favor by loving you unconditionally and accepting you always, so that you feel strong enough and safe enough to do anything you set your mind to. ”

[catcrazyx]

for the ask game...... KAITO!! :D

EHEHE MY BABY!!!!!!!!! :DD THANK YOU!! Of course my fav character of all time, like really :3 right up there with Chiaki eheh.

Favorite thing about them: Basically everything!! He's such a complex and interesting character, I feel like there's soooo much to him, he's so cool to get to know more of, and his character alone gives me the opportunity to explore a lot of deep interesting topics and seeing things more grey rather than black and white. Besides, he's not perfect, and even though I love him, I found myself disagreeing with him a lot, which is seriously so amazing, I love flawed characters which make them more relatable and human!! Now more into Kaito himself, LIKE HE'S SO BEAUTIFUL AND AMAZING, LIKE HE ACTUALLY ALWAYS CARED ABOUT EVERYONE AND WANTED EVERYONE TO SURVIVE AND FOLLOW THEIR DREAMS AND BE HAPPY! He hides himself bc he's scared to be seen as weak, but also bc he's scared of not being relied on, and if nobody relies on him he can't help anyone. He always puts others above himself even if he appears a bit cocky sometimes, he shows to be very insecure deep down, when he said "you fell for a guy like me" I literally CRIED, he deserves so much love. When I first saw him I thought he was a bit out there, and his design was not my thing, apart from the space design on the jacket, but now he's like super hot, everything about his design is beautiful bc it's so unique of him and I love him, even that stupid goatee I wanna touch it so badly AHHHH Kaito with his hair down also >>>>>> -

Least favorite thing about them: Like I said Kaito is not perfect, and what I dislike about him has got to be how he treated Ryoma. I wish they had gotten a better treatment like in the manga we get to see how Kaito really feels about Ryoma and Ryoma would also surely appreciate that support. But in the game, Kaito was very insensitive for sure, I consider that there's more deep down besides the idol thing, like, everybody forgets that Kaito was already dying by that point and he knew that. Him seeing his idol giving up on life when Kaito thinks he has a "choice" (it's not a matter of choice, but following Kaito's train of thought here) but Kaito himself does not have a choice, he has so many dreams but he knows he's dying and I feel like that must have had some impact on why he treated Ryoma like that, relating again, with the fact Ryoma was his idol, someone whom he admired to follow his own dreams, so I know it must be heartbreaking for Kaito, but it was still very insensitive, and I really wish they at least had some better interactions in UTDP, bc I really think these two deserved to be on better terms. -

Favorite line: J-Just one???? Nah, that's illegal. Here have a bunch of lines: 1. "Being able to share your burdens with others… that's how you get stronger" 2. "Hey! Were you guys making out while I was gone?!" 3. "Hey! Who you calling NPC, you A-S-S!?" 4. "If you want to give up, wait until you've done everything you possibly can!" 5. "The impossible is possible! All you gotta do is make it so!" 6. "No matter how many times we fight, we smile in the end... that's what true friendship is!" 7. "Sometimes you gotta be a little reckless to make your dreams a reality!" 8. "That could have been anyone walking around in women's underwear! Even me!" 9. "That's because, limits don't exist unless you set them yourself" 10. "I believe in you." -

BrOTP: With Himiko!! Not actually related, they are best friends! I had made a "understand my friendship" in 5 minutes post where I showed a bit their dynamic. Kaito sending Himiko very cute memes and images, while Himiko sending cursed things just to scare Kaito, but in a lighthearted way! Kaito actually believed in Himiko's magic or at least on how she wants to make people smile with her magic and I'm sure he'd help her believe in herself more. Also Kaito would totally give Himiko piggyback rides when she's tired!!! Another BrOTP is with Kazuichi! They'd be such good bros! Ahh I wish they had interacted at some point, they'd totally bond! I love how some people made comics showing how Kaito would help Kazuichi get over Sonia, move on and become someone he can be proud of, learning to love himself and chase his passions. Also how Kazuichi would talk about rockets with Kaito, I love them so much!! -

OTP: SAIMOTA IS LOVE, SAIMOTA IS LIFE!! They support, admire, love, care, never judge one another. They are so sweet and so cute and adorable and they are also so gay, like... I could be here talking about them forever (I was, but CHARACTER LIMIT ON TUMBLR SOMEHOW??) Anyway, they fit so many themes and aesthetics, like, Saimota is literally SEASONS, like, spring, summer, autumn, winter!! They also fit so well either cottage core or even like city streets, neon lights, parties, they are perfect in every way. They hold hands to comfort each other. They switch their roles a lot, always support each other equally and communication is really their strength!! They already went through that development in the game, and it's perfect. Anyway, special other OTP mentions: Training Trio, Oumota, Amamota, Akamota, Momoharu, Gokumota, Cyberspace and basically yeah, any ship with Kaito is great. -

NOTP: With Junko. Keep her away from my boy. I saw some people make some headcanons of them interacting, no, no no no no NO. My boy deserves love and happiness! -

Random headcanon: Kaito never met his dad and his mom left him, so that's why he grew up with his grandparents. He was always dreaming and studying so he was actually a very lonely kid, but he'd always be happy and smiling bc he wanted to make his dreams come true! Also all of Kaito's clothes have some sort of space design or space related thing about them bc I say so. -

Unpopular opinion: Kaito is not homophobic or misogynistic. He has toxic masculinity traits, but he always respects women, he may have made some sexist comments, but it was never out of hate for women or for seeing them as less than men?? Kaito didn't see Maki as weak because she was a girl, he invited her to the meeting of who would fight Monokuma in ch.1, he also invited a bunch of other girls, he clearly respected their strength. Even if he says "a man shouldn't apologise so easily" Kaito does apologise when he needs to and he also says that to Kaede, he tells her to not apologise for something that's not her fault, clearly showing how he doesn't treat women differently. And he's not homophobic just because of a very misplaced word that came out of nowhere and didnt' mean anything for anything at anything in the story, characters, dynamics, relationships, plot, nothing. It was put there by the writers for nothing, it has no relation to Kaito's character at all, there's no other evidence of him being "homophobic", he's not homophobic!!! He may have some traditional views, and Kaito is stubborn about a lot of things, but he cares about others and I'm sure if they'd teach him more about it, he'd try his best to respect it, bc he can see the good in people deep down and that's always what he cares about the most! - Another unpopular opinion is that PG Kaito is not a bully, he's pretty chill actually, I consider him intimidating, but not physically violent!! I hate how everyone just decided to make him a bully to find an excuse to hate on Kaito. Kaito doesn't even have a canon sad face PG sprite in the wiki, for me he's even more chill than IG Kaito, he's just protective over the ones he loves. He'd NOT bully Kokichi or Shuichi, instead he'd be stepping in to protect them!! -

Song i associate with them: Oooo I have A LOT. I have already made a video for him with the song "Stressed Out - Twenty One Pilots", but I have many others, which I don't want to reveal bc I plan on making a video with them in the future, so it's a surprise :) -

Favorite picture of them:

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT SHU LIKE HE'S THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING HE'S EVER SEEN, HE BELIEVES IN HIM AND IN HIS SKILLS AND AWWW HE'S SO PROUD