#asoiaf weddings

[asoiaf-bambii]

𝔐arriage 𝔦n 𝔚esteros

MARRIAGE:

A marriage is a legally or formally recognised union, typically between two people. In most cases, it is a religious ceremony between one man and one woman who should not be more closely related than first cousins. The union involves the exchange of vows in the presence of sacred witnesses, such as a septon (for the Faith of the Seven), a heart tree (for the old gods), or a priest or priestess (for the Drowned God). The ceremony is followed by a feast where the bride and groom celebrate with their guests. The event concludes with the bedding, during which the marriage is consummated.

WEDDING CEREMONIES:

In Westeros, the wedding ceremony is a religious affair. The bride's father, or someone standing in for him, escorts the bride to her future husband and those officiating the marriage.

⋆ ─ Faith of the Seven: A septon presides over the ceremony, which includes prayers, vows, and singing, and takes place in a sept. The bride wears a maiden’s cloak in her house’s colours. The bride's father, or his representative, removes her cloak, allowing her husband to drape a cloak in his own house colours over her shoulders. This act symbolizes the bride’s transition from her father’s protection to her husband’s. The bride and groom then exchange vows, with the septon declaring them man and wife, proclaiming they are "one flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever."

⋆ ─ Old Gods: The ceremonies are much shorter and involve no priests. The bride is escorted to her groom, who waits in front of the weirwood tree in the godswood. A ceremonial exchange follows, confirming the identities of the bride, the groom, and the person giving the bride away. The bride is asked to accept her husband, and upon her agreement ("I take this man"), the couple joins hands, kneels before the heart tree, and bows their heads as a sign of submission. After a moment of silent prayer, the couple rises, and the groom removes the maiden's cloak, placing his own cloak around the bride's shoulders. He then carries her to the feast in his arms. Some northmen believe that snow on a wedding day foretells a cold marriage.

CONSUMMATION:

In Westeros, the bedding occurs after the feast. The bride is escorted to her bedroom, often by the male guests, who undress her along the way while making crude jokes. The women at the feast perform the same for the groom. Once the bride and groom are in the bedchamber, they are typically left alone, though guests may gather outside the door, shouting suggestions. In some cases, witnesses may be present for the bedding, but the extent of their involvement remains unclear.

Women, especially noblewomen, are generally expected to be virgins on their wedding night. After some weddings, the bedsheets are displayed to show blood, proving the bride's virginity.

Although it is rare for a marriage to take place before the bride has had her first flowering, it does occasionally happen. However, bedding a bride so young is considered perverse.

Lords in Westeros once held the right to the first night, allowing them to bed newly-wed women before their husbands. Queen Alysanne persuaded King Jaehaerys I to abolish this practice, but it continues illegally in some parts of the North.

DIVORCE:

Vows spoken at swordpoint are not considered valid, and in theory, a marriage can not be declared if either person refuses to say the vows. However, issues of consent can still arise even when the vows are willingly spoken. In cases where lands are at stake, a lord might still claim the marriage as legal, even if it occurred under duress.

In the religion of the Drowned God, it is possible for someone to be married by proxy, without their consent, or personally saying the vows. However, if the marriage has not been consummated, it can easily be annulled.

In the Seven Kingdoms, marriages can be ended in various ways. A king has the authority to set aside his queen, even if she has borne him children, in favour of marrying another.

Under the Faith of the Seven, a marriage that has not been consummated can be annulled by the High Septon or a Council of Faith. Even if the marriage has been consummated, it can still be annulled, regardless of its length or whether children are involved. An annulment can be granted in the absence of either spouse, though it must be requested by at least one of them. The exact procedures of a Council of Faith remain undefined.

Another way to end a marriage is for the bride to join the Silent Sisters. Similarly, when a man takes the vows of the Night's Watch, his marriage is considered null and void.

POLYGAMY:

Before the Andals arrived in Westeros, Garland II Gardener, a King of the Reach known as the Bridegroom, had multiple wives. To marry the daughter of Lord Lymond Hightower, he set aside his other wives. According to the songs, Ronard Storm, a Storm King, had twenty-three wives.

Followers of the Drowned God may have only one rock wife, with whom they have trueborn children, but they are permitted to take multiple salt wives. Children born of salt wives are not considered bastards and can inherit if there are no heirs from the rock wife.

⋆ ─ All my information comes from the A Wiki of Ice and Fire page!

[naggascradle]

really i think the red wedding is perhaps one of the best moments in modern literary history because its soooo much more than just that one scene ive said it once and ill say it again nothing in asoiaf is a complete and utter shock twist everything is foreshadowed like being woven into a great tapestry of everything that happens. the red wedding is foreshadowed so much you feel it looming over every narrative involved and i really do believe the cultural consciousness of the spoiler that it will happen improves the reading for the red wedding. you know that sickening feeling that everyone here involved is doomed and there's nothing youu can do to stop it. daenerys's vision of a king with a wolf head surrounded at a feast of the dead a whole book before it even takes place. the emphasizing of how you should never ever ever ever violate the laws of hospitality its a crime against the gods and catelyn continuing to push that they should eat first no more matter what. the legend of the rat cook and the gods anger over it. and then you realize not only is the red wedding a tragedy but it is just the beginning and a narrative device that will span every house involved and their downfalls. it is by design that tywin lannister plans it and he's dead by the end of the same book along with his grandson. oh red wedding you will always be famous i love you so dearly and i cannot wait to read the fabulous horror of the demise that lord walder frey will meet

[vintrage]

the young wolf

[ceruleanharley]

it's giving king baela and princess jace

[tenthmuseondine]

Bride of Winter | Catelyn Stark, née Tully

[jonsnowunemploymentera]

You know what, props to Jon Snow for being the greatest wedding planner of all time. My boy managed to arrange a wedding that broke like every social norm in the north, between groups that have warred for MILLENIA!! and officiated by a foreign religion! Crazy that no one died like there wasn’t wasn’t even a lil scuffle. Some people can’t even get through a wedding without murdering their guest which btw indicates a lack of skill on the planner’s side I'm afraid. After the events of the past year, his services are desperately needed because how were people getting anything done before him??

[duchessofthemoonartworks]

No, don’t, don’t cut my hair, Ned loves my hair. 

Inspired by Catelyn Tully at The Red Wedding {2024}

[c-m-li]

Tywin Lannister's greatest trick was convincing everyone he was more clever than he actually was.

People are still quoting him in this as if it's a great question and he was in the right.

Except people forget, Tywin Lannister convinced people to forget -

They didn't just kill a dozen men at dinner.

Yes, they killed the wedding party, but everyone forgets that Robb Stark had a third of his army at the Twins with him that the Frey's and the Bolton's slaughtered.

Tywin didn't choose between killing a dozen men at dinner or 10,000 in battle, he did both.

[ophelias-lamentation]

ASOIAF AU where Theon rescues Sansa from kingslanding, Red Wedding never happens, Sansa and Arya reunite about 3 years into the series

I added color!

[15-lizards]

Ten million ways you could contextualize this but for simplicity: Sansa and The Faith in some way

[tentakrool]

Saint Robb of Winterfell, King in the North, patron of soldiers and the betrayed.

[vysperian]

"no, don’t, don’t cut my hair, Ned loves my hair."

[maekarlargenaturals]

Am I making you feel sick?

Elia Martell you will always be so famous to me.

[llutik]

her firstborn

..so ugh you know how once there's been only cat and robb in her scary and not very promising newly married life... and how robb was her whole world

and how he really is her whole world in death???

[visenyaism]

Hello bestie I am curious as to your thoughts on the "Rhaegar saw Dany while she was having a vision of him and mistook her for a future Visenya" theory, if you're willing to share them? I can't decide which side of the fence I'm on (seems like a misinterpretation to me, but does do the whole reinforcing the tragic themes of prophecy thing, which I do love)

eh im not super into it being that literal i think prophecy works best when it’s a bit more thematic and metaphorical because the whole point is interpretation and misinterpretation. i also don’t think rhaegar ever saw dany and mistook her for a daughter, i think it would make more sense to mistake dany for himself, just like she mistakes herself for rhaegar in her own visions.

the version of this theory that i really like is that daenerys bringing the dragons back is such a powerful moment that returns magic to the world that it sort of reverberates out and wraps the timeline around itself. to the extent that people who are dreamers are getting snippets of it like hundreds of years earlier as well. but people see what they want to see and turns out a lot of targaryens who saw someone walking out of a fire unharmed or hatching three dragons from stone or melting a bunch of ice soldiers with dragonfire or crossing the trident and they said thats ME i am the prince that was promised in order to get the dragons back i have to do those things. and they killed themselves trying to accomplish this because it was never going to be them it was daenerys, someone who they would have denied all power and agency and never suspected of greatness if she had been around in their time. i think thats neat

[moireia]

lost and led by stars — the titles of alyssa snow

"I’ve been given many titles throughout my life. Bastard, Lady, Princess. I have no desire to add Queen amongst them." —Alyssa Martell, 302 AD (inspo)

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