#ask roach

[ask-roach-questions]

In the event that someone's insides are now on their outside, just put a clean, damp cloth over any visible intestines to keep them moist until help arrives!

Follow for more tips and tricks.

#eviscerationwednesdays

[roachgore]

so who was the artist behind it?

if i remember correctly the artist behind it was ano shimizu (i believe this is his pen name?). him and a fellow artist were big fans of wrestling and traveled overseas to watch some shows which led to this.

theres not much about him online but he did some official art for video games back in the day such as these.

im not sure if he draws anymore but anyway this art is a big inspiration to me

[cockroachinaroom]

Please don't ignore me

Hello, I'm Lina from Gaza🇵🇸🍉. I'm part of a family of 8. I'm married with two young children. We've been bombed, besieged, and starved. Sadly, I've lost many of my family members❗ and I can't afford to lose any more. With a heavy heart, I'm asking you to help me spread my campaign. Please, what I'm asking is too much. Can you write a post about my story and share it with your friends? I desperately need your support. My father and brother were injured in the bombing and are in critical condition. They need to travel for treatment. I need your support. The genocide is still going on

You are my only hope for survival.

https://gofund.me/4f077ab2

⬆️⬆️⬆️ Go ahead and help Lina!

[yooo-lets-go]

Wish you were here

[cod-dump]

DONT sneak up on soap, he will punch you. Hard. Usually in the stomach, but faces have been bruised.

The only one that does it successfully is ghost because he has enough anticipation to catch johnnys fist, and he thinks it’s hilarious. Graves and Alejandro have each been punched somewhere in the double digits, but they keep trying because they swear they can dodge. They can’t. Roach does it on accident all the time and soap always feels bad. Gaz just walks around like, “I am announcing my presence now! I am here! I am three feet away and approaching!” Price just walks around to his front like a normal person.

Some soldier in the SAS has definitely been keeping count. Graves definitely has been punched the most, Alejandro a close second. Ghost got punch once (that everyone knows of) and has been a master of avoiding Soap's startled wrath.

Gaz occasionally gets swung at, but he's good at letting Soap know he's there. Price has seen Soap nail Nik in the gut and decided to be smart and make sure the man can see him or hear him coming. Announcing their presence is the most logical thing to do when you're not quick like Ghost.

Roach hasn't learned to announce himself like Gaz and Price, he has so many bruises from Soap. He doesn't learn.

[ask-roach-questions]

@ask-calico-jack @ask-stede-bonnet @ask-edward-teach weigh in?

[roachgore]

is the amiibo repaint in your icon done by you? i feel like it was, but i honestly cant remember if i made that up or not.

no it wasnt by me but this is the original image (with my icon being tweaked a bit by me back in 2017). i honest to god cant find who did this with all the reverse image searching i could do but here it is anyway.

[solarpunkani]

Hot 4am take but I feel like if we want to get people more interested in making their yards a more habitable space for wildlife like insects, we have to acknowledge that ‘Don’t want bugs in your house’ is still a 100% fair and valid point of view. ‘Loves nature’ and ‘doesn’t want roaches spiders and mosquitoes in the house’ aren’t opposites.

And with that in mind, when we propose to people that spraying pesticides around houses is Not A Good Idea, Actually, I feel like we need to give an alternative asides from ‘deal with it.’

[yvnziee]

you wouldn’t be anywhere near comprehending my dreams to understand how i got to this point in life—drawing grown warriors—afraid of a platypus—clinging onto princesses

[ask-roachsanderson]

Im so glad no one in my asks is horny

let me eat your ass out baby girl

which one of you freaks sent this shit

[yooo-lets-go]

When no one mentions roaches random item antennas does he make them bigger and more obnoxious till he ends up with windshield wipers or something on his head?

P.s in love with these weirdos you have blessed us with

That’s tactical I suppose

[cherie-doll]

Cod men reaction .

He and reader were on a mall date and reader suddenly stopped to look at a kids toy/a book/a book series. The thing is, reader grown up as the oldest grandchild, they used to have that toy/book(s), but it was ruined by their younger siblings/cousins.

Based on my real situation. Sorry for the broken grammar, I was typing this with one hand while eating pizza.

this reminds me of how i used to collect the archie comics as a kid and i loved reading them until my younger sibling ruined it bc they slobbered all over the pages like a dog, also, i hope that pizza was good i'm lowkey hungry

༢ུ· Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Rudy, Phillip Graves, Makarov, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto

Price would turn right away when he noticed you've stopped walking. He's watching you, the skin creasing around his eyes as he smiles and his eyes soften. There's just something to seeing you in awe, recognizing that thing you've wanted for a long time, the nostalgia that must've bubbled up inside of you seeing it again. He'll come up beside you and say "why don't we buy it?".

Simon stared, confused at what could be so interesting, and when he saw it was only a silly stuffed animal. At first he thinks it only caught your attention because it was cute, but it was quite plain, a little ugly looking plush too. But you remember hugging it when you slept as a child, it had a certain smell to it too, until it got ripped apart by your sibling's puppy. You had cried but never got a new one. Without prompting from his part you start telling him the story of how much you loved that thing, and how you still sort of do. Silently nodding and already pulling out his wallet.

Johnny actually pointed out the game you mentioned playing when you were younger, the game you described to him because you couldn't remember the name of it. "Isn't that the game you've been talking about?". You excitedly reply that it is as he picks up the box, your eyes going straight to the price tag but he's already going to checkout to buy it. You ask him what he's doing, "you've been wanting to try it out again, right?" he replies with a smile.

Kyle remembers the time he helped you go through boxes when you moved in with him and how he opened a box filled with old stuff from your childhood. He had found a set of beat up books, some with pages missing, chunks ripped out or with crayon scrawled on them. You tell him it was a series you loved reading as a kid but was messed up by your siblings who played a mean prank on you. He later goes on out and purchases the same set of books and surprised you with them when he arrives home.

Roach once noticed a keychain made of seashells hanging on your bag, some of the shells were broken but it still looked like it had been a pretty little trinket. He played with it, fidgeting with it until he asked you why you still carried the old broken keychain. You tell him it was a gift from your late grandfather that he had made, kids had pulled at it and it had fallen to the floor, breaking in pieces. You had tried fixing it before but were missing pieces. He didn't buy you a new one, instead he spent an evening gathering seashells that looked close to the broken ones and rearranging them in the same order. It was difficult but was worth seeing you happy.

Alejandro could probably late to having to give up your toys to younger siblings or cousins because he had to do the same. So, it feels as if he heals something within himself when you both stop and look at the toys in a secondhand store that bring you a sort of nostalgia. He remembers summers spent playing outside and having to share the toy plane with his siblings. He notices you staring at a toy too and decides to give into making the little kid still in both of you happy.

Rudy has seen how you still keep the little dolls aligned neatly on your shelf. He's noticed how you put up a new one every time you find one when going through your old stuff. He's listened as you tell him how there is one specific doll you remember owning that was your favorite to play with, until it was either taken by some other kid who thrown away accidentally. He spots it at an antique shop and recognizes it because he's always thinking of you. Knowing this will make you feel complete he buys it and excitedly goes home to show you.

Phillip would have been walking along just like any other day he takes you shopping at the mall for you to let some stress out by swiping a credit card. He felt the absence of your hand on his arm and when he turned around he saw you in the toy shop through the glass display. When you held it in your hands, you felt your old emotional attachment to the toy reignite, it was smaller than you remembered but still as secure and comforting as ever. You turn to find Phillip beside you, he only nods, giving you the green light to just go ahead and buy it.

Makarov would hardly deny you from buying anything you wanted. It just strikes him as odd for there to be a change in the pattern you keep of buying clothes, jewelry and other luxurious items for a stuffed animal. But he knew that soft look in your eye, the reminiscing of a memory from long ago still etched in your mind that bloomed in your heart again. His eyes went from plush to you and back to the plush again. He told you to buy it and anymore you might have wanted.

Keegan found it slightly amusing that you had gotten so excited over seeing a children's series you thought had become lost media. He had taken you to the bookstore and instead of finding some cute romcom or some classical piece of literature you ended up in the corner of the kid's book section immersed in rereading the series that had become your escapism when you were a kid. You were going to leave it back where you found it when leaving but Keegan just chuckled and told you to buy the entire series.

König stared curiously at how entranced you were by the plush the kid held in front of you while at the food court. At first, he thought you were having baby fever or something, but really you were more interested in kid's backpack plush. You remember having one as a kid, you used to take it everywhere with you until you lost it, not knowing if one of your parents gave it away. You passed by a store that sold them, and König guided you inside the store to buy one for you. It was funny when the lady at the register asked if it was a gift for your kid.

Horangi knew you always had a thing for collecting adorable figurines, toys, anything that reminded you of when you were a kid. You took care of them so well too, placing them on shelves which he built btw, and dusting them off frequently. When asked why you were so particular about caring for them, you said it was because your old toys were always being broken from your siblings playing too rough with them. It must've broke your little kid heart to see them on the ground, all dirty and chipped off pieces. Now, he is always surprising you with one when he comes back from the store.

Nikto's first thought was that you had picked up the figurine as a gift for one of the kids in your family. At first, he couldn't understand that you were getting it for you, you were staring at the toy so fondly. What memory could have arisen in your mind at the moment? But he recognized the feeling of finding serenity in the little mundane things in life; in your case a toy. He offered to pay for it and as he drove home, he kept glancing over to you and seeing how you had the little thing in your hands, holding it instead of leaving it in the bag. He couldn't even tease you for it.

[emmster]

20 21 40 GhostRoach ^.^

Gonna do the on a scar for this one

[ask-roachsanderson]

Way to go, Ruby

*pout*

Ill be in my barracks...

Cap. We have a....unique problem out on the feild.

Roach is uhm...in the walls. Like-ACTUALLY in the walls. im talking to him through morse code. Makin' Soap think the base is haunted. Kinda is, with ghost around and all.

@rubysrandomaskblog

I find that kind of funny. But, @ask-roachsanderson , i want you in your barracks at 9:30.

[werecreature-addicted]

envy demon who is a cuck

Envy demon pumping their cock watching the love of their life getting railed by a lust demon. equal parts jealous, disgusted, and turned on. they try to ask you if you feel good, if you still love them, but you're too fucked to respond properly, all you can do is moan as you get pounded into the ninth detention.

[cod-dump]

Just played some MWII (2009) last night, shot Soap in the ass by accident because I saw sudden movement.

And then I proceeded to get nailed by a snow mobile.

Captain MacTavish having to write a report on how he ended up with a bullet in the ass and why Roach got knocked into next week by a snow mobile. It’s funny now, looking back at it, but in that moment it was so fucking embarrassing having to take note what happened.

Ghost wouldn’t stop laughing when he got all the information on what happened, in tears because he’s laughing so hard. Best part (for Ghost) is that Soap isn’t even sitting properly yet, which just adds to the humor of it all.

It may have been embarrassing for the two of them, but at least someone got a much needed laugh.