#asd problems

[talesofanautisticwoman]

Chronically tired

I hate how autism somehow makes me tired all day everyday 24/7. It's often after finishing small tasks my tiredness hits me like a brick.

1. Going for a walk?= tired 2. wanna go the mall?= tired upon arrival 3. wanna go grocery shopping?= tired 4. Oh you wanna go for a car ride=tired 5. Oh you wanna bake a cake?= tired I also somehow manage to only feel like a fully functioning human being for like 2-4 hours a day or less. These days i'm also so burnt out i don't have the energy to do stuff i actually love and are passionate about.. and not having something to hyperfixiate on makes my feel empty inside.

A thing that also makes me feel burnt out is when i accidentally say yes to something i don't want to because i panic. Then i have to gather the courage to call back and say i'm not able to come.

[imkrisyoung]

Someone in a group that I’m in: You’re quiet.

Me: Yeah, I was more expressive when I was younger, but then people told me I was too loud or talked too much.

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

You don’t have meltdowns you can’t be autistic

*has a meltdown*

You’re grown ew stop throwing a tantrum like a baby

[martian-mellow1]

Job application: do you have a reliable mode of transportation?

Me: *flashbacks to when I walked through a blizzard to the bus stop to get to my college class* yes :)

Tbh i don’t really understand what that question means? Like if you’re asking if I have a car the answer is no because I can’t drive (and even if I could drive owning a car is too expensive). And honestly I’ve walked through horrible weather to my current job (a mile from my house) and ended up being the only one who’s shown up because “the weather is too bad to drive in”. This question should be eliminated from job applications because it makes no sense.(plus I’m sick of having to hide from potential employers that I don’t have a car because the bus is “not a reliable source of transportation”). 😑

[noballoonsinspace]

@staff @support much appreciation for all you do but listen

do yall not understand that a vast majority of your user base is either autistic af or otherwise hella neurotic for any number of reasons, and we have a profoundly hard time (neurologically emotionally or otherwise) processing change that is frivolous, unsolicited, and ineffectual.

I don't mean "we don't like it" or "we reserve the right to whine about it" I legitimately mean that significant changes in interface make it extremely difficult to take in and process any or all of the visual information and this renders the website effectively unusable.

Annoyed and overstimulated in unfamiliar surroundings is the exact opposite of the experience I'm looking for on this website.

Please be inclusive of all disabilities all neurotypes by changing it back or giving us the option to do so. Thanks so so much

[jokeroutxoxo]

Am i the only one who can feel so exstemely overwhelmed because of my hyperfixations? Like life is so freaking boring without a hyperfixation because they’re really fun and gives you an interest, but sometimes they can be really emotionally overwhelming and draining. I can be so extremely excited and happy about something to do with said hyperfixation - so much so that I’ll be stimming for hours, shaking uncontrolbly, ticking, feel light headed and feel like i’m about to throw up - but when i’ve calmed down and the adrenalin has worn off, i get so exhausted and drained and i can’t even bring myself do anything. I’ll be completely consumed in something and so devoured by emotions that when i’ve finally calmed down I’m too emotionally, physically and mentally drained to do anything but lie down. All because my body expresses emotions by physical symptoms and the strong waves of adrenalin and feelings can feel like drowning In intensity.

Yes? Okay.

[mxshr0mz]

"babe its two am go to sleep" "and here we have a limited edition springtime 1998 model furby but it was released in spring time of 2000, isn't that crazy!??"

[answer2jeff]

another extremely lonely feeling that comes with being on the spectrum ; wanting everyone to be interested in what you're fixated on, while also wanting to keep it niche and "to yourself," and being seen as dramatic for doing so.

[emptyspaxes]

I actually used my AAC in public today for the first time. I know this might not sound like much to some people, but when I have speaking issues and end up nonverbal or having a verbal communication issue (I don’t know what to call it without people getting mad at me) I normally just stop talking all together and isolate myself. This AAC really helped me so much today and I don’t feel so drained physically and mentally from work. I’m really happy so now I don’t have to go home and sleep the rest of my afternoon away, I can play a game or read!!

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Also, I don’t know what you’d call it that I have. I was nonverbal for well over 7 years and have on and off verbal issues where I can talk some days but most days I’m completely silent. Recently I’m having an episode that’s seeming to last about 4 days.

[hammill-goes-fogwalking]

I felt so neurotypical today, a reason to celebrate this, weeee!!!! ♾️

[turtlecommunism]

i’m tired of showering and washing clothes and doing dishes and all the other tasks why why why do i have to repeat all of these things so frequently why is it a cycle of clean this thing so it can get dirty again and then clean it again i wasn’t made for this

[talesofanautisticwoman]

Struggling with communication

Anyone else who tends to leave out important pieces of information when communicating with other people? I tend to leave huge important chunks of information. Apparently I expect them to know the information.. because if I know it, then they must know it too... Not. Then they have to dig out the information,, lets just say it's a work in progress. I don't want people to misunderstand when i'm saying.

[2outta3aintbad]

What’s the word for the neurodivergent thing where you recognizing pain/physical discomfort wayyy later than you should (poor interoception) but then somehow still decline to do anything about it even though you want to.

Like when the ridiculous way you’re sitting that you thought was very comfy 5m ago suddenly really hurts and now you’re hyperaware of it, but you still stay that way and continue to suffer for no real reason

Or when you get kinda dizzy and realize you haven’t eaten all day and you have snack variety in arms reach, but instead you starve while thinking about snacks

Wtf is that

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Can a person be exponentially autistic?? bc sometimes I’ll have some wacky shit to say and I’ll think “wow that’s soo autistic of me I’m gonna share this with the internet autistics they’ll appreciate the sentiment” but then the internet autistics will be like

“…what are you on about”

Anyway shoutout to autistics that constantly feel like they don’t belong or fit in EVEN in safe spaces and autistic communities. You’re doing amazing

[merakimagic]

For so much of my life I’ve been someone else.

At home I played the role of the perfect kid. Didn’t talk back, did the chores when my sister wouldn’t, tried to keep my head low and stay out of trouble. I was the embodiment of sunshine. But that’s because I was so scared to be someone else. I saw that if I didn’t act this way then it would make my family mad and they would just complain about the person I was. I didn’t want to make anyone feel hurt… I didn’t want to feel hurt.

At school I was the good two shoes who tried to do everything just right, who tried to be the perfect person even if I wasn’t the perfect student. My home life was so hectic I just wanted to place where I could deal with little issues and laugh.

Once I started to get jobs I had to play the role of the perfect employee and going into being a AIN in aged care at 17 (now being 19) I have to be patient. Get physically, Verbally and Mentally abused and just take it.

My entire life I have had to pretend to be someone else and eventually I got so sick of trying to play a role at home that at 14 I stopped. I stopped caring because despite all I did my parents still fought, my sister still had an issue with me and I was still constantly told to calm down and not act that way or to stop saying this, it’s just in your head. I was constantly told these things that I just stopped. I wanted home to be the one place where I could be… Me.

But after today, with literally crying my eyes out and getting into a massive fight with my sibling because I couldn’t regulate my emotions and how she refuses to see how she has hurt me throughout our entire childhood, it looks like I have to give up being me.

My sibling believes they know exactly who I am and why I do what I do. But the truth is no one does… not even me. Having ADHD and Autism can be hard. It’s not an excuse but at the same time your still not “just right” despite how hard I try there is still always an issues. Including despite how my sister has always spoken down to me and tried to act like my mum and treats me like an idiot, it’s like I’m just meant to be okay with but I’m not. Despite how she has been manipulating me my entire life the only reasons the fights have become so bad is because once again I’ve stopped caring about protecting her feelings and have started fighting back and as soon as I do she brakes down in tears like I’m a monster. She goes on about how emotional I am despite how she can’t seem to control hers either. I have lived my whole life having to control who I am and not even just control but fake who I am. Pretend like I don’t love letting loose and that I can handle being over stimulated. That sitting still for ages doesn’t drive me crazy and act like my mind isn’t in complete disarray.

But now even though I’ve forgotten how to the fightings become so bad that I’ve decided to play a role again. I’ll figure out who they need me to be and I’ll be that. And I’ll keep myself to myself. I want to let people in but not at the park expense of constantly hurting the little girl inside. I’m not going to let her be hurt anymore for being herself, so around others I’ll put on a smile and play the part perfectly. Giving this little girl all the love and affection she has never received from the world and I’ll kept her hidden away from others so that she isn’t lost or feels like she has to change every again. Ill never change who I am at my core.

It’s a performance…

Time to take the stage.

[kitkitart]

I don't often outright say it to anyone I meet, but I am on the autism spectrum. I thought I'd share my own experiences since it's disability pride month. (under cut)

As much as I love being out in public doing fun things or working on my art, the noise can sometimes make things difficult. I notice throughout my life I hyper-focus on sounds, colors, and lights, causing them to interrupt my train of thought. The sounds of being in public such as the clanging of utensils, loud music, the cloud of conversations, and screaming toddlers make me simply shut down into autopilot. It's a bad habit I've been working on, because it makes it frustrating and embarrassing when I'm trying to remember what I was going to order when it's my turn in line.

I often feel really bad when it takes me five minutes to order my food. I feel like I'm holding up the line, and I know that not everyone can be understanding or realize I am on the spectrum (I assume most people don't know). Within those five minutes I'm trying to remember what I was going to order, grounding my focus, managing my emotions, and maintaining my social cues. That's a lot of mental energy being spent! One of my strategies to enjoy myself in an otherwise high-energy but low-pressure environment is the restroom. They're usually the quieter areas of the building. When entering a restaurant, I spend just a half-minute mentally preparing myself (using self-compassion) so I can socially function and be aware of my environment. It works 90% of the time, but when it doesn't I just need to outright leave for a bit (I even take a short walk!). I don't always have these options, and that's scenario I'm still trying to figure out. Despite it all, I love being in public, and I love being in communal spaces with friends and family. Sometimes these places can be difficult for me to be in, but it's still much better than being in my bedroom all day. :)