#as you can see I take a very unique and in depth approach to writing with very nuanced symbolism (sarcasm)

[roosterr]

white flag ✹ epilogue

note: im kinda sad to say, but this will be the final part of this series! im so so grateful for all the love and support for it, this was honestly so fun to write! i hope everyone enjoys and have a wonderful day/night!!!!<3<3<3

pairing: ghost x gn!reader

wc: 1.7k

no use of y/n

reader's callsign is 'stingray'

summary: your night in date with simon :)

warnings: domesticity, so much fluff, soap and gaz are wingmen again, tiny bit of light angst

ao3

【prev】

of all the things in this world that could be considered intimidating, flowers were the last thing simon would put on that list; but the brightly coloured flora seemed to have a paralysing effect on him as he stands in the tiny flower shop.

with a quiet, defeated groan to himself, he dials johnny's number and presses his phone to his ear.

"what flowers am i supposed to buy?" he blurts no sooner than soap picks up, not even bothering to greet him in his haste.

"hello to you too?" johnny mumbles, his confusion evident. a moment passes before he registers what simon asked, "oh! wait," he laughs, his voice getting further away as he lowers his phone to call out, "gaz, get out here! lt.'s buyin' sting flowers!"

simon considers hanging up then and there, but he's severely out of his depth and unfortunately, soap and gaz are his only hope.

"oh i see, he needs an expert opinion, does he?" kyle's teasing gets louder as he approaches soap, and he can hear the smile in both the sergeants' voices.

really, simon should've known they wouldn't let him off easy.

"christ alive…" he keeps his voice as low as possible, pinching the bridge of his nose in the corner of the small shop. "just help me, you pillock." the cashier has been staring at him since he walked in, and honestly, he doesn't blame them; a giant man in a mask isn't exactly the regular clientele for a florist.

"uh, probably their favourite?" soap suggests, the sound of gaz's muffled chuckling just about audible in the background.

"they don't have 'em." simon replies, his eyes darting over the vibrant display one last time in the hopes that the answer would somehow appear.

"nah, you want roses, mate." gaz interjects, and he hears soap make an agreeing noise.

simon hums. "aren't they too… cliché?" he asks, stepping over to the large display of rose bouquets. it's the classic choice, he's aware of that much, but whether or not you'd prefer something more unique was weighing on his mind. this was something he never expected to have to worry about.

"no! they're romantic," gaz insists, his amusement still very evident in his voice, "trust me mate, sting'll love them."

simon contemplates his point for a moment, staring at the deep red petals and trying to imagine the look on your face if he gave them to you. you'd been happy with a handful of squashed flowers he'd stolen from the flowerbeds on base, so he doubted you'd turn your nose up at them. it doesn't take him long to make a decision.

"alright, cheers." he mutters, grabbing a lively looking bouquet of a dozen from the display and making his way over to the cashier – who was quickly trying to pretend they hadn't been staring.

"you'll need to give us a debrief–" soap begins, but he's cut off by simon hanging up and shoving his phone back in his pocket. he gets the feeling he won't be hearing the end of this for quite some time.

✹✹✹

it's only when he's standing outside the door to your room that the nerves finally start to set in. he can't help but feel like an idiot, fidgeting on the spot about to knock on your door like a lovestruck teenager, almost crushing the stems of the roses with his iron grip.

he knocks twice, before he has the chance to change his mind and back out. not even a second later, you're pulling the door open and regarding him with that warm look that has his palms sweating.

you're wearing casual clothes, and so is he, as per the agreement you made to keep this 'date' simple. it doesn't matter what you're wearing though; he's seen you covered head to toe in blood, sweat, mud, and whatever else, and you still manage to be utterly breathtaking in every way.

with a nervous cough, simon holds out the rose bouquet to you, hoping you don't notice the way his hands are shaking.

"wha…" you blink in surprise at the flowers, taking them from him and admiring them with a tiny smile. "you bought these, right? didn't just rip 'em out of someone's garden?" you raise a teasing eyebrow at him, your smile turning more playful.

"yes, i bought them." he grumbles lightheartedly, a smile of his own forming under his balaclava. the way you effortlessly diffuse the tension has his anxieties melting away.

"thank you." you breathe, softly caressing the vermillion petals. "they're lovely, i love them."

simon let's out a quiet sigh of relief at your affirmation. "good; cost me a tenner, they did."

the laugh you let out is like music to his ears. "well, i'm sorry to bankrupt you." you grin, turning back into your room and carefully putting the bouquet in the vase on the mantle. after making sure the arrangement looks nice, you come to stand in front of him again.

simon's not sure how to continue, the nerves from earlier resurfacing as the conversation fades. the way you're watching him expectantly, he feels the urge to take you by the hand – and as if you read his his mind, you hold it out for him. he places his hand in yours, squeezing gently and leading you the short distance to the kitchen.

he'd set the table earlier, having found an only slightly discoloured tablecloth buried in the back of the cupboards. it's a little sad, but it was the best he could come up with.

"wow," you tease, the same playful smile as before on your lips as you meet his eyes, "so fancy."

he snorts, ushering you over to your chair and pulling out for you. "only the best for your majesty." he preens at your happiness when you laugh again, glad for the mask covering what he's sure is an obvious blush.

he occupies himself by grabbing the two plates he'd finished preparing a minute ago, just before he'd met you at your door.

"i made spag bol." simon mutters as he sets them down on the table. he keeps an eye on your expression as he takes his seat opposite you, anticipation of whatever response you may have.

"fine by me," you say, an easy smile lifting your features. "it's almost the perfect candlelit dinner, all we're missing is the candle."

simon blinks. "you don't like candles." he replies, a hint of confusion in his gaze when he meets your eye.

"no," you smile fondly, looking down at your plate. "i don't."

a comfortable silence falls over the room as you both start to eat. the warmth and normality of it all makes simon’s heart swell with affection. he's happy, content, being here with you, even doing something as monotonous as eating dinner. you make it worth enjoying.

"how is it?" he asks once you've both finished, once again waiting apprehensively for your reaction.

"it's great," you give him a lopsided smile, resting your chin on your hand as you look at him. "thanks for cooking."

simon quirks an eyebrow at you. "you don't have to lie." he mutters, feeling the tips of his ears burn under your intense gaze.

"okay, well, don't quit your day job." you chuckle, standing up and making your way over to the sink with your plate in your hands.

he huffs a small laugh, and joins you at the sink with his own plate. "you're crushin' my dreams here."

"sorry, chef." you grin and gesture to the washing up in the sink. "you wash, i'll dry?"

"if your majesty insists."

you turn on the radio for some quiet background noise, and the two of you start cleaning up in tandem. it's nice, how you can work together so seamlessly with no need for words. he's struck again by the thought that if he were alone this would be a chore, but with you beside him, he finds such a tedious job surprisingly pleasant.

simon hands the last dish to you, and as you take it your fingers brush against his hand. the way he flinches away from your touch is unconscious, and when he looks over to you he expects you to pity him, or be offended by his action – but your face holds neither of those things.

you're just drying the dish he handed you, the same content expression on your face that had been there all night, as if you didn't even notice.

"sorry." he mumbles, his gaze falling from your face to your hands as you work.

simon loves you. he shouldn't be afraid of your touch. he wants to touch you, and for you to touch him. he doesn't know why he reacted like that.

"don't be." you utter, soft and compassionate, and his heart feels like it's about to burst out of his chest. for the third time that night, he's hit full force with how wonderful you are.

there's no judgement, no probing questions, nothing. you understood him, even though you had no idea why he acts this way.

you turn away, your back to him as you store the dishes in the cabinets. you hadn't been looking at him before, but now he was sure you couldn't see him, he feels his throat constrict with the overwhelming urge to burst into tears.

simon takes your free hand and you pause, still facing away as you wait for his next move.

he takes a small step closer, minimising the space between you, and rests his forehead against the back of your head. with his eyes screwed shut, he takes a deep breath and inhales the familiar scent of you. his grip on your hand tightens slightly.

you lean back into him, a quiet sigh escaping you as you squeeze his hand in return. neither of you say a word, but you don't have to. he feels how you love him in the way you never expect more from him than he can give.

it's the most peace he's felt in years.

taglist p1: @sofasoap , @siilvan , @mockerycrow , @i-love-ghost , @projectdreamwalker , @achelois-is-here , @adamsloverboy , @thatchickwiththecamera , @chickensandwich69 , @batmanunicorns523 , @tiny-kasper , @dezibou , @pampeop , @cumbermovels , @goth-boi-atlas , @berryjuicyy , @guiltgoreglory , @postmodernrevolutionist , @untoldshortsofthefandoms , @delilah-grimes , @sunflowerqueen1416 , @luvssemma , @sunshiinegaz , @imonmykneessir , @kenz-ee , @eistro-phobia , @rzmarona , @alanalanalanalanalanna , @cathnoneofyourbusiness ,

@madsothree , @geisterfvhrer , @lazyninjaphilosopher , @aliilium , @koi-feish , @chaoticgoblindev , @clear-your-mind-and-dream , @thrivig-n-jiving , @lesterous , @glitterypirateduck , @slu77ym4nw415ts , @livelaugh-light , @trulylavendedarling , @stateofcatatonia , @rivalriotrenegade , @yoichiislovie , @nirvanaaaonly , @ameliaamareeee , @batmanunicorns523 , @sapientiia , @thesecretwriter , @susanmukami , @ryze1113 , @stars-andfreckles , @spya1 , @tunaa-luvchrm , @tzutology

[waitmyturtles]

Have you read any of the Thai academic papers regarding MAME's work? sometimes I feel like fandom at large has a very strong western bias towards her that borders on xenophobia in review of anything attached to her unless it's more low stakes gmmtv style stuff like wedding plan was which suits western sensibilities more.

Hi, Non! This is interesting framing you've put forth here. I want to note that I'm close with some folks, particularly @bengiyo and @lurkingshan, whose critical tastes I trust, and I can assure myself that they would not call Wedding Plan low stakes. During my Old GMMTV Challenge project, I promised myself that I would not watch another MAME show after Love By Chance and TharnType, and I've taken Ben's and Shan's urging to chuck that aside to add Wedding Plan to my OGMMTVC syllabus, which I'll get to after my summer travels. Let me take a second to sort this all out in a more sensible and chronological answer to touch upon what I know about MAME now that I'm much more read into Thai BLs and the history of the genre.

Regarding academia and MAME, I have not read Thai source material on her start and her legacy in Thai Y novel writing and Thai BL/Series Y television productions. What I am in the midst of reading at the moment is Dr. Thomas Baudinette's Boys Love Media in Thailand (Baudinette hailing from Australia), and he does get in depth with MAME's beginnings, which for me was the first primary source material that I have encountered about her background. To summarize quickly, MAME (along with individuals like INDRYTIMES/Kwang Latika, who wrote the original novel for Love Sick, and others) was part of the first crop of young middle-to-upper-class female college students who became enamored with Japanese BL/yaoi manga, as well as (in many cases) K-pop idols, and began writing fan fiction about and/or in the styles of these interests, which led to the development of the unique Thai Y novel genre.

It does seem to me, at least on Tumblr, that a good chunk of Western fandom here has written off MAME. I'm Asian-American, and I come to my hesitation about MAME from a particularly Asian perspective, so I really can't speak for the non-Asian fans about what they're rejecting. Let me at least explain what I'm rejecting, and how I've engaged in dialogue about it with critical friends here.

LBC did not have as much of what I will attempt to describe as I saw in TharnType, something that I might now call collectivist homophobia or collectivist bias. But LBC had a smattering of it, something that I smelled early on in that series. In both series, MAME seemed to approach her characters, to me, with a distanced hand of judgement that, to me, recalled the kinds of biases that my Asian parents tried to implant in me in my childhood, that I rejected throughout my young years. Queer material is so very often not good to its queer characters, and it seemed to me through LBC and TT that MAME intended to gild that lily to channel a populist homophobia that she seemed to know would resonate with a broader fanbase -- which it did, in part, because TharnType in particular was the first Thai BL with heat in every episode.

(Two things to note about my review of TharnType that I penned last year. First item to note is that Boys Love Media in Thailand had not been published yet, and I had not read primary source material about MAME. I was enraged at the time about fan theories that MAME had been a victim of sexual assault, and had therefore written her queer characters with the biased vitriol that I perceived coming from her because of that theorized past. I still think these theories are equivocating and problematic. Second item is that I heavily recommend reading the reblogs of my TT review, tags and posts and all, to see literally the spectrum of commentary of the MAME fandom/anti-fandom across Tumblr. Writing that post and reading those reblogs was a hell of a great experience.)

Just to summarize this, then -- I choose to not engage with MAME because I see under- and overhanded bias in the work that I've watched, with my Asian eyes; and I just might assume that many Westerners see the same thing. But I don't really know, because I haven't talked to that many Western fans about the depth of this.

So what does this mean for this moment in time? I understand MAME's Love Sea is airing, which I'm not watching, and I missed the boat on Love In the Air -- so I think I'm missing some critical and/or catty chatter about those two shows from the fandom because I don't have context.

But I do know there are folks out there that either write MAME off wholly, likely for similar reasons that I've listed above, and/or hate-watch her shows and post about it. To each their own.

I would not have considered Wedding Plan if Ben and Shan weren't screaming about it. I'm happy to have fewer shows on my plate, I got no time. However.

Nothing in this world exists in a static vacuum. If MAME is experimenting with tone, approach, style, and even taste regarding her shows, then more power to her. @bengiyo's post linked above about Wedding Plan is important for me to see, because I see that he's noting that parts of the fandom may have actually demonstrated real homophobic dialogue about MAME's fictional characters, which, to me, I'm like, what? Really? You got time for that? But also:

If MAME, back in 2019 with TharnType, picked up that her Thai and global fanbases were more inclined to check in with collectivist homophobia, as I'm calling it.... and now, in 2023-2024, has noted that her fanbases might be far more inclined to support real queer equality and overtones in shows, and is including those themes in her work -- can we not welcome that change in? That's why I'll give Wedding Plan a shot.

Let's be sassy and ironic for a second. Could she be making this change for da money and the fame? Sure. But -- capitalism unfortunately rules this world. Car commercials in the States have interracial queer couples parenting children nowadays. If equality talks to money, then content makers will take note. I think I'd be a hypocrite to say that MAME shouldn't make her dollar, all while she's experimenting with more equitable stances.

Last note. There's been quite the dialogue simmering these past few weeks about GMMTV's We Are, and whether or not GMMTV is stepping away from a past where many (not all, but many) of its shows explored queerness in depth. He's Coming To Me, Bad Buddy, Dark Blue Kiss (yes... the first three shows I listed were Aof Noppharnach shows, fuck), Theory of Love, 3 Will Be Free. The major GMMTV BL/GL shows that have aired recently that have made huge waves on social media -- Only Friends, 23.5, Last Twilight, and now My Love Mix-Up -- were/are helmed by branded (capitalism, hello!) pairs, and three out of four of them were flops, with MLMU already treading that territory in EPISODE TWO, for heaven's sake. (Y'all, read the reblogs on this post. Wow.) I finished a rewatch of The Eclipse weeks ago, and I'm dragging my feet on my review, because of what I think that show represents for what branded pairs end up doing to otherwise original content.

I want to posit a theory, that I'll work more on when my OGMMTVC is over, that we have living, real-time proof that the branded pair system is failing good content -- because these shows have to produce engagement snippets of these pairs, instead of more broadly penetrating artistic content. GMMTV's one-off shows with non-branded pairs, like Be My Favorite and Wandee Goodday, are FAR MORE INTERESTING content-wise, varied and inquisitive in their artistic takes on queerness. Even Cherry Magic, featuring the long-awaited return of TayNew, felt fresh, because we literally hadn't seen TayNew in FIVE YEARS. Tay actually KISSED ANOTHER DUDE, shocker!, in 3 Will Be Free. I want to go back to those days, where the pairs could act well outside of their range and their business partners, instead of being limited to the same tone and style that their pairings and their fandoms demand.

I say ALL OF THIS, because isn't it interesting that GMMTV seems to be reverting on a scale of inquisitiveness about queerness -- and MAME seems to be going in the opposite direction?

I would not have expected it. But I have found, lately, some of GMMTV's "takes" on "queerness," as in Only Friends, to be outright offensive. This corporation has become far more gunshy to let their branded pairs just be fictionally gay. If MAME wants to take on a healthier stance of equity, and to play around with more realistic depictions of what it means to be queer in Thailand, then go for it, girl. I will admittedly be watching Wedding Plan with my Asian side-eye and my smell tests for bias, but I look forward to being proven wrong about my suspicions. I want to be a responsible fan here, open to MAME's changes.

This ended up being a lot, but thank you for provoking these thoughts, Non.

[hyperactively-me]

cutting down a christmas tree with könig 🎄🧤🪓 warnings: none (i guess a warning would be that this is my first time ever writing for könig, sooo hopefully this is not too bad)

The forest is a winter wonderland with pine trees covered in snow, their branches adorned with glistening icicles. The scent of pine fills your nostrils, a nostalgic aroma. As you and König trek into the forest, a blanket of snow muffles the sounds of your footsteps. You sink a foot into the snow with each step, the powdery substance threatening to spill into your boots. The air is crisp and invigorating, and you can’t help but feel the excitement of chopping down a tree for Christmas with your boyfriend.

“Are you keeping up well enough back there, liebling?” König calls over his shoulder, his eyes sparkling with anticipation.

You roll your eyes playfully in response, the cold air turning your breath into visible puffs. "I'm keeping up just fine, König,” you reply, playfully waving your hands. “You’re the one with the long legs!” 

König seems mostly unbothered by the depth of the snow whilst trekking farther into the forest, strong legs pushing through the slush. 

“Uh, I can slow down if you would like,” he offers, slowing to a stop to wait for you to catch up. He gives you a pointed look, adjusting the straps of the backpack carrying the heavy axe he was going to use to chop down the perfect tree. The moment you reach him, he flashes you a half smile, then keeps going. 

You catch up to König, appreciating his willingness to slow down for you. “Thank you,” you smile, falling into step beside him. The snow crunches beneath your boots, and you enjoy the rhythm of your synchronized footsteps in the snow.

“Do you see any you like, liebling?” König questions, surveying the couple of firs in front of him. 

You scan the area, taking in the trees standing tall against the winter landscape. Each tree is definitely unique, but some are too tall, and some are too sparse. After a moment, your gaze settles on a particularly cute fir tree, its branches evenly spaced and adorned with delicate icicles that catch the soft glow of sunlight.

“How about that one?” you suggest, pointing to the tree that caught your eye.

König follows your gaze and nods in agreement. “Perfect choice, liebling. It’s yours.”

With determination, you and König make your way toward the chosen tree. The snow underfoot becomes slightly deeper as you approach, but the prospect of finding the perfect Christmas tree propels you forward. König expertly adjusts the straps on his backpack, ensuring the axe is secure. As you approach, you can’t help but gush over its compact size and the way the snow is delicately draped over its branches. 

“It is very charming,” König states, taking a moment to assess its size and shape. He takes a step back, shuffling through the snow to create a sort of divot for him to stand in. “This is the one,” he declares with a confident smile.

König then takes the axe from his backpack, setting it down as he crouches beside the tree, inspecting the trunk from different angles. You watch König's every move, appreciating the care and attention he puts into selecting the perfect spot to make the cut.

“Do you need help?” you ask, standing off to the side a bit, studying König’s hunched back as he surveys the trunk of the tree. 

König looks up at you, his eyes softening with a warm smile. “I’ve got this, liebling, but thank you for offering.” 

Oh, you know he’s got this. It just never hurts to offer some help. You take a few steps back, giving him space to be able to cut down the tree, your breath visible in the frigid air. 

König pushes himself up to standing, grunting as he straightens up. You watch as his large hands twist the handle of the axe in his hands, finding a firm grip on it. As he positions himself and prepares for the first swing, you take another step back, giving him the space he needs. König's strong hands grip the axe tight, and with a steady determination, he delivers the first blow. 

The rhythmic thuds of the axe against the tree trunk tears through the tranquil forest. König's movements are deliberate, each swing calculated and purposeful. The muscles in his back and arms flex with strength and precision. As the tree begins to topple, you marvel at how effortlessly König maneuvers the axe, bringing the fir closer to hitting the ground. 

With a final, decisive cut, the tree succumbs and falls gracefully into the powdery snow. König lets out a triumphant whoop, and you join in, clapping your gloved hands excitedly. You push your way through the snow to approach him, and together, you survey the fallen tree.

“That was amazing, König!” you exclaim, genuinely entranced by his skill. “This tree is perfect," you say, running your hands along its branches.

König turns toward you, a twinkle in his eyes. “Team effort, liebling.”

You laugh at his comment, shaking your head. 

“What, a team effort is me picking the tree and you doing all the heavy lifting?”

König stares at you for a moment, a funny look on his face. 

“Yes?” he says.

You chuckle, reaching to grab his backpack for him, but he kicks it out of your reach. When you look up at him, you realize that he’s not kidding. With a grunt, König slings the backpack effortlessly onto his shoulder. “I’ve got this, liebling. You’ve done enough by choosing the perfect tree.” He winks at you, and you giggle. 

“Ok, but I really can help—”

König interrupts with a smile, “I appreciate the offer, but I’ve got it.”

With a sigh, you finally relent, knowing that he is set in his ways.

“Alright, alright, but only because you’re being so pushy,” you say, shuffling in the snow. 

König nods approvingly, a glint in his eyes. “Good. Now, let’s get this back to the car.”

König grabs the base of the trunk, securing it tightly in his grip. You walk by König’s side back through the snowy path, the tree leaving a trail of fresh imprints as he effortlessly carries it. You reach over in an attempt to share the burden, but König immediately wrenches his arms away. 

“Absolutely not, liebling,” König protests, a playful smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “This tree is my responsibility. You just focus on enjoying yourself.”

“Alright, alright, I give up, you win,” giggling, you put your hands up in mock surrender. “It was worth a shot.”

König snorts, his determined strides sometimes outpacing you, causing you to have to shuffle a bit faster to keep up. Upon reaching the car, König expertly secures the tree to the roof rack, making sure it's snug and won’t budge during the drive. You push up onto your toes and hand him the straps, and together you make sure everything is snug and secure. The tree sits proudly atop the car, ready to be taken home.

“Looks great, I think it’s secure,” you call out from the opposite side of the car. König circles around to your side, pulling on the straps to test the integrity. 

“It will hold,” König declares with a satisfied nod. “Very good.” He leans down to place a gentle kiss on your forehead. 

With the tree securely fastened, you both climb into the car, relishing the warmth that envelopes you as soon as he closes the car door for you. König starts the engine, and you begin the drive back home to your shared cabin. As he drives, König reaches over to squeeze your hand and press a kiss to your knuckles, a gesture that fills you with warmth. The ride home is filled with shared glances, laughter, and the anticipation of continuing the holiday festivities. Christmas carols play softly on the radio, and you stare out the window at the wintery world. 

Upon arriving home, König carries the tree into the living room, its branches brushing against the entryway. The scent of pine fills your home, immediately creating a cozy atmosphere. With the tree in its designated spot, you take a moment to appreciate the view of your boyfriend standing so proudly at his work. 

“Now, let’s decorate,” König says, pulling out boxes of Christmas decorations.

You both set to work, unpacking boxes of ornaments and string lights. You strategically hang ornaments on the branches, fluffing up the branches as you go. König takes charge of untangling the stubborn string lights, his patience wearing thin as he curses under his breath.

You can't help but giggle at König’s slight frustration with the tangled lights. “Need a hand with that?” you offer, reaching for the knotted mess.

König practically throws the lights into your hands, grumbling at how impossible they are to untangle. When you untangle them in less than 30 seconds, König’s eyes are practically popping out of his skull.

“If only you let me help more often,” you say, smirking playfully.

“Eh, I can make it more of a once in a while thing,” König says as he takes the lights from your outstretched hands. König then wraps the tree with the lights, using his stature to his advantage to reach the top of the tree. 

Once the last ornament is in place, you step back to admire the decorated tree. The room is bathed in a warm glow, and you share a satisfied glance with König. He reaches for a small box from one of the decoration bins and presents it to you with a smile.

“What's that?” you ask, intrigued.

“Open it and see,” König replies.

You unwrap the box to reveal a delicate, handcrafted ornament. It’s a miniature wooden sled with tiny details, clearly carved with great care. You run your fingers over the smooth wood, appreciating the craftsmanship.

“It's beautiful, König, thank you,” you say, touched by the thoughtful gift. You look up at König, and the smile on his face is priceless. 

“I thought it would be a nice addition to our tree, something to remember this Christmas.”

You find the perfect spot for the ornament, and König lifts you up slightly so you can secure it to a sturdy branch. As he sets you back down, you take a moment to pull him down for a gentle kiss. With a tender expression, König leans in and captures your lips in a sweet, lingering kiss. 

Eventually, you find yourselves nestled on the couch, blankets wrapped around you, and the crackling fireplace casts a fiery warmth on your legs. The room is filled with the soft glow of the Christmas tree sitting prettily in the corner of the living room. König pulls you closer, and you rest your head on his shoulder, relishing in the beauty of the tree and the warmth of the man sitting beside you.

[nanowrimo]

5 Techniques to Help You Write Your Novel

Every writing project is unique, and the methods that help you draft one novel may not work for another. If you’re getting started on a brand new project this Camp, NaNo Guest Vee James has some suggestions for different techniques to help you explore your story. It took a few NaNos before I realized I was developing different techniques each time I sat down to the challenge. I think we all do this naturally, but it helps to step back and observe the process. If you’re strictly a pantster, you’ve been working on the story ideas in your head. If you’re a planner, you’ve set to paper the story concepts, characters, and an outline of what you are about to produce on paper. Some people take a hybrid approach to NaNo. Granted, the basics remain the same: butt in chair, accomplish the hourly/daily goal, and allow yourself to tell your story.

I discovered that each unique novel presented particular challenges, and I had to adapt my style and writing techniques in order to explore the story and keep the production happening. Some of these came from writing instructors and wonderful podcasters. Some came from “how to write” seminars and workshops. Others grew out of a feverish search for “more words.”

Here are five techniques I’ve found that helped me advance writing projects:

1. Research

It was a surprise to me to discover the concept of researching for fiction. I initially thought, “Just make something up.” But there are so many ways to broaden your approach. Plumb your memory, take a course in something related to the story, talk to an expert, and ask lots of questions. You could even become like the character in order to feel what they feel. If you’re writing a western, go ride a horse.

2. Write Scenes Out of Order

If you have a premise, you’ve already got scenes in your mind. Don’t wait until you get to chapter 18. Write that scene now. You can always revise it when you catch up to that point and it gives you something to develop toward. To expand on this technique, when you’ve written the scene, ask yourself, “What happened just before this?” or “What does this scene lead to?”

3. Put disparate characters together and have them have a conversation

Often, we write secondary characters who take a more subdued role in the plot. But what would happen if your protagonist’s best friend had a conversation with the main antagonist? Or if the antagonist’s agent of destruction came upon the protagonist’s love interest? In my experience, these conversations frequently produce more depth in your secondary characters and almost always it’s something you weren’t expecting.

4. Play with Genre Tropes

What have you chosen to write? Urban fiction? SciFi? Fantasy? You already know what your reader expects you to write, and what the plot ahead holds for them. How can you twist it? Sometimes the simplest thing you mentioned in chapter one can be the linchpin of a great plot twist.

5. Study Film

It’s no accident that some of the most astounding stories have been told through film. Quite simply, movie companies invest heavily in every aspect of their production and hire some of the best writers around. Yes, it’s a visual medium and has some advantages over prose. But the main lesson with movies is in the structure of the stories they tell. Here’s a good example: when I was writing a fairytale novel, I wanted to stay true to the classic story structure. One afternoon I was watching the comedy, Galaxy Quest, taking careful notes on the structure. I realized the story structure mapped very closely to what I was doing in the fairytale. It was comforting to see this, and it also gave me some ideas on how to approach the ending.

Most importantly: NaNoWriMo is a thrilling if exhaustive experience, and I urge you to immerse yourself in it completely. Write with utter abandon, delve deep for concepts that will give you the next 2000 words, and try new things like you’re a Mad Scientist in a hurry. We all know that what you end up with is a messy creation. But you will find you have given yourself a great gift.

Vee James is a cross-genre author who loves to write comedies, fairytales, and YA supernatural. He participated in NaNoWriMo for ten years in a row, writing over a half-million words, and it led to nine NaNo novels plus two more non-NaNos. Out of this work, he’s published four novels, with a fifth nearing completion. If interested, visit his site at www.veejames.com and leave a message. He loves to talk to writers of all kinds. Vee's photo by A. Roger Hammons Photo by Daniel Álvasd on Unsplash

[liquidstar]

april fools is over so now im going to be slash srs instead of slash j. im going to post a little excerpt from one of the oc writing practices ive been doing :) again im not super experienced for a variety of reasons but im doing my best here.

but im going to try and put my self conciousness to the side (thats probably an important part of the practice too, right?) since this isnt final version either way, i can just say im sharing a WIP! so for now it will go the way of most of my other oc stuff..... under the cut

the only context you need is that this would be the opening scene for the story. if i post others i'll have to give more context bc most of them are taken from the middle of something. anyway here goes:

-----

“I love you

I've loved you since the beginning

From when you were only stardust

To when you will rejoin the stars

When everyone will be together again

Understand, you don’t simply live in the universe

You are part of it, taking on a form uniquely alive

You are the universe giving love back to itself

I love you so much”

“Wait!!!”

A lone girl jolts awake, crying a plea into the empty air. Tears stream down her cheeks, as she calls for someone she doesn't know. Her heart aches with a nameless yearning that fades with the memory of her dream. Still, against her will, the emotions linger. A profound sense of love consumes her, an agonizing, grieving love, meant for her. She sighs and wipes away her tears. It was an absurd dream, a ridiculous notion.

As her conscious mind clears, she takes in her surroundings; a forest drowned in the pale blue light of dawn. Her sleeping bag, now encased in dew, was laid on the cold grass. She sits for a while, gazing at the faint sliver of the rising sun’s glow with an indistinct expression, and eventually stands up.

The lone girl begins her daily routine by braiding her hair. With a wave of her hand, she freezes dew on a rock, creating herself a mirror. Her fingers carefully weave her brown locks into a braid, now adorned with a snowflake clip and a scarlet ribbon. She throws on a long blue half-skirt over her shorts, matching her shirt. She forces on a pair of black boots and cuffs on her arm. Lastly, she grabs a moon-themed spear, and she's ready for the day.

Before setting off, she made sure to pack all her belongings, including her numerous hand-drawn maps and a compass. However, she also stops to look into the bag deeper, foolishly expecting to find something new. Instead, she only sighs, "Still no food."

She puts on the backpack and trudges forward anyway, ignoring the hunger pains as best she can. She hums to keep herself distracted.

As she walks, the trees tower above her, shrouding the horizon and taunting her. Birds occasionally fly into view, but seem to disappear in an instant. She wonders if her eyes are playing tricks on her.

The lone girl scribbles on her maps, trying to record a labyrinth of identical tree trunks and twisted paths. This proves useless, as this elliptical forest has her going in circles. Exasperated, she fidgets with her compass, only to see the needle is frantically twitching around. She presses it gently to her forehead and quietly complains, “Don't tell me you're broken…”

Her train of thought was cut short by the sudden sound of running water, so loud she can’t fathom how she’s only now begun to hear it. She decided to put off one problem for another. Following the sound through some shrubs, she quickly finds the source.

Her spear at the ready, she approaches the stream. Scanning its depths for signs of fish, she walks cautiously. Her posture was awkward, her expression was uncertain, betraying her lack of experience. She held her spear to her chest with both arms as she encroached the water’s edge.

She inhales in preparation, removes her skirt and boots, and enters the water with slow, careful steps. The very surface of the stream begins to freeze as it makes contact with her skin. Tiny, thin crystals of ice form as she steps further in. Breathing deeper, as she tries to control the frost, she makes her way to the center of the stream. She stands waiting for fish.

Rather than throwing her spear to hunt, like the intended purpose, she stabs at the water. She’s not good at this, however, and only ends up scaring other potential prey away. She makes several attempts at this but is unsuccessful each time. Refusing to quit, her repeated strikes become more desperate and uncoordinated with each failure. Her growing frustration only makes the water freeze deeper, eventually solidifying around her legs. She yelps, now in a panic, and begins to frantically stab at the ice to free herself.

A mess.

Escaping this ordeal, the lone girl abandons any further attempt at fishing. It probably isn't her calling anyway. She trudges on, lost, wet, cold, and hungry.

She looks at her compass again, her face reflecting in its glass. “You're broken,” she tiredly states, as she feels her eyes begin to well with tears.

“No! No no no! Don't cry! Don't cry Polaris,” The lone girl, Polaris, reassures herself, “Last time you cried you froze your eyelids shut, and that really hurt,” She whines aloud.

Polaris takes a deep breath, slaps her cheeks, and swallows her tears. She elects to follow the river, her only hope of escape, pursuing the promise of a village just beyond this enigmatic forest. She daydreams of a warm meal in a cozy restaurant, and maybe a cold desert too. A glimmer of determination returns to her stride, as she continues her hum from before.

[thebonerpit]

31 Days of Dragon Age

Oct 28 - Favorite Inquisition lore/codex entry

... how much time do you have? I think this is a good opportunity to talk about how much I love the lore of Dragon Age in general. First of all, while it does have some fairly common "fantasy" type things like magic, dragons, elves, dwarves etc. it approaches them in what I find to be quite a unique way. Especially with magic and how just being born a mage in most places will basically see you confined in a Circle for the rest of your life! But aside from that, the way that the codex entries are presented is probably the best I've ever seen in a game series (maybe aside from Control but that's a whole different vibe). You're reading them not as hard, solid facts but as books or papers or notes written by various different people from different backgrounds with biases and perspectives. None of them can be considered "fact" necessarily because it's only one side of the story! Seeing what the Chantry writes vs. what elves write is just one example of some glaring differences, or anyone from Tevinter who writes about blood magic or slavery.

As far as my favourites go, there are genuinely too many to pick from. I mentioned I have a binder with all the codex entries printed out and DAI takes up half the binder on its own. It's WILD. They go from something like the entire story of Hard in Hightown (in 9 parts) to the background of an enemy type or crafting material to a silly joke (Plants vs. Corpses) to some of the most in-depth lore you've ever read.

In the interest of not being here all damn day I'm going to pick the entry On Skyhold. Not only do I love how it's written in such an accurate style of a researcher picking through different sources, the lore implications... whew. If we don't go back to Skyhold in DAV I'd be surprised tbh. I feel like it was the location of something very, very important.

[colescorner]

Reading Wrap Up: June-August 2024

Hello out there! I've been very inconsistent about posting regularly, I am gonna be working on that to try to make a schedule to have regularly scheduled content for you guys...anyway, I'm gonna share what I've read the last couple months! My wrap ups may contain SPOILERS so read at your own risk.

June

Source: Goodreads

Title: The Last Hours: Chain of Thorns Author: Cassandra Clare Genre(s): Fantasy, YA, Fiction Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books

For anyone that's seen any of my book reviews or bookish posts before knows Cassandra Clare is my favorite author! She is responsible for turning me into the reader I am! So, it's only natural that I start with one of her books...Chain of Thorns. This is the final book in The Last Hours trilogy which is a follow up to her earlier trilogy The Infernal Devices. We follow James and Cordelia and the merry thieves as they must save London from a demon invasion all while trying to mend their friendship with one another.

One of the things I always enjoy with Clare's books are the ensemble of characters we meet. Each character is unique, distinct in their voice and serve a purpose to carry the story forward. Some of my favorite characters that I have really connected with are Thomas Lightwood and Alister Carstairs. Their pairing seemed so unlikely at first, but throughout the course the book, we see how their relationship develops. Thomas is very endearing and likable and Alister is the polar opposite, which is why their pairing was an interesting surprise! I became invested in them and what would become of them as this trilogy came to a close.

I am a sucker for a good romance and one of my favorite tropes is forbidden lovers and Clare is a master of this trope. This trope is displayed in James and Cordelia as well as Alister Carstairs and Thomas Lightwood. Clare's characters are inevitably human so they're flawed as we all are which makes the tension between James and Cordelia, and Alister and Thomas all the more palpable. Each couple keeps each other at a distance for their own reasons and as the story progresses, you cannot help but to root for each respective couple to end up together! James and Cordelia are kept apart over the course the series even though it is evident that they love each other.

Even though Clare's plot can be intricate in each novel, I find it easy to slip into this world she has created. I have been reading her books since 2010 so I am very familiar with her writing style. I still think her books are approachable to those who might be new to the fantasy genre.

I will say it did take me a little bit to get back into this world, but once I did, I was able to leave reality and travel to Edwardian London. It was good to be back in a familiar setting. I did throughly enjoy reading this book, it has an enjoyable plot, diverse characters, good pacing and a satisfying conclusion.

If you've never read any of Clare's shadowhunter books before, I recommend reading them in publication order.

July

Source: Goodreads

Title: On Cenorship: A Public Librarian Examines Cancel Culture in the U.S. Author: James LaRue Genre(s): Nonfiction, Politics, Books About Books, Social Justice Publisher: Fulcrum Publishing

Recently, I've been wanting to read books about censorship, both in general but also specifically surrounding books banning which seems to been on rise for the last few years now. This book is written by a librarian with 25+ years of experience in the industry. He has worked tirelessly to defend the freedom of people having access to books of all genres and topics.

Throughout this book, LaRue goes in depth about the adverse effects that banning books can have not just in small community but on a much broader scale. LaRue makes the point that libraries are not just for one person or type of person but that it is a community space. And as such, patrons should be able to have the freedom and access to all types of books, even ones that could be classified as controversial. He also explores the process of what happens when a book at the library is challenged, which I could not get enough of!

If anyone enjoys books about censorship and books, then do yourself a favor and read this one! I devoured it and I loved it, I found it so enlightening and lifted my spirits to know there are people who, in my opinion are true patriots of this county by standing up for our intellectual freedom to read what we want!

Source: Goodreads

Title: Book Lovers Author: Emily Henry Genre(s): Fiction, Contemporary, Romance Publisher: Berkley

Because of my love for reading, I enjoy reading books about books. This is my first Emily Henry book, at lot of my bookish friends have recommended her to me and after reading this, I can safely say that I want to read her other works as well! I am a hopeless romantic and I find I love a good romance read!

Even from just reading the synopsis, I had a good feeling about this book and my instinct was right! This book follows Nora, a literary agent in New York and is known as a "shark" to many of her colleagues and Charlie who is a book editor. Nora knows Charlie and is not fond of him at all. Nora's sister, Libby invites her on trip to Sunshine Falls, a setting from a popular author, whom is Nora's biggest client, for a girls trip The twist is that Libby has made a list of popular bookish tropes that Nora has to try and accomplish before their trip comes to an end. Nora reluctantly goes only to discover that Charlie is also in Sunshine falls because he grew up there! Nora is pretty much pissed that Charlie of all the places in the world, had to come here while she is on her trip with her sister.

One of the tropes I've realized I enjoy is enemies to lovers. I love the main characters in this story, I love how Nora is a complicated character, it makes her character development all the more gratifying as the story progresses. Charlie is equally as complicated as Nora, both of them are sort of at odds with one another, throughout the course o the book but they eventually develop feelings for one another.

It was easy for me to slip into the world that Henry creates, her characters feel real, tangible, making the reader become invested to keep turning the page to figure out what is to become of Nora and Charlie, will they get together at the end or will Nora keep him at a distance like she has with everyone else?

I'm not gonna lie, I became extremely invested in this story and there were points where I cried and laughed and experienced a whole range of emotions. I completely fell in love with Nora and Charlie and their story.

Source: Goodreads

Title: Read Dangerously: The Subversive Power of Literature in Troubled Times Author: Azar Nafisi Genre(s): Nonfiction, books about books, Essays, Politics Publisher: Dey Street Books

I've been making more of an effort to read books from other genres this year, specifically nonfiction and most of the books I've read so far this year from that genre have been pretty good! I'm continuing reading about censorship and I found this one at my local bookshop.

This book is a collection of letters the author wrote to her late father. Each letter has the author informing her deceased father about the current state of the world while also making connections through the many critical authors that influenced her throughout her life. The letters also make the point of why literature is important in a true democracy.

What was truly astounding about the book was the parallels she made between the United States and Islamic Republic of Iran, where she grew up. I was astonished to say the least when I realized how many parallels there are. It was very thought-provoking and I annotated the crap out of it!

If anyone enjoys books about books and censorship, I would highly recommend giving this book a read!

Source: Goodreads

Title: The Song of Achilles Author: Madeline Miller Genre(s): Historical Fiction, Fiction, Fantasy, Romance Publisher: Ecco

If anyone has seen the books I've reviewed or talked about before, then you know I love me some Greek Mythology! This is the first book I've read my Madeline Miller and I must say I was very impressed and already have her other novel Circe and novella Galatea (which I've read already). This is a retelling of legend of Achilles and his companion Patroclus, whom I've never heard of before. Once I settled in, I got lost in the world that Madeline Miller brought to life.

Achilles is a demi-god born from a sea nymph, he is destined to become the greatest hero in the land and lead his people to victory against the army of Troy. Patroclus was from another kingdom who got banished when he killed a boy in his youth. Patroclus was banished to the kingdom where Achilles was they were both boys. Patroclus befriend Achilles and eventually became his companion. Patroclus accompanies Achilles on his quest to become this great champion. The bond they create over the course of their journey is one of friendship, brotherhood, and love.

You cannot help but become invested in the story of Achilles and Patroclus and continue to turn the pages to see how everything will play out. The ending was bittersweet, part of me wishes it would have ended differently but another part of me is glad it ended the way it did because it has a humanity to it.

[thecinephileperson]

Oppenheimer review

Going into Oppenheimer, I had ideas for funny review titles and stuff like. I am putting my dark humour aside of this and talk about it as I see in now our generation's reintroduction to the atomic bomb. 

I loved this movie and I wish I could give it a 10/10 and that would be the end of it, but that is not truly representing this film, so here is my rating, one that I feel is more objective 9/10.(but like only a little bit) Oppenheimer, the biggest pitfall it that it is not very approachable. It has a run time of 3 hours, which I know does not take it out of the running, along with this it is R-rated with warning about suicide and sex scenes. However, the rest of this movie is beautiful and devastating with so much gravitas. Everything is amazing and so perfectly right. 

Explanation for my rating and more in-depth review under the cut. 

First Oppenheimer was directed by Christopher Nolan written by Christopher Nolan, Kai Bird and Martin Sherwin working with a bunch of amazing actors this piece would not be it what it is without all of these people.

I break my ratings into 5 or 6, animation or live-action, categories these are equally weighted and are in my opinion equally important now on to the ratings.

Directing 10/10

Oppenheimer had gravitas, you could feel it in your soul. This three-hour movie held you, you were there, and you could understand his emotions, the fear he had. Christopher Nolan, It uses perspective beautifully to show distance between characters and create depth in the world. The story telling somehow protects the viewer from the most traumatic parts but lets us in on the pain at the same time. The different perspectives and jumping back and forth in time keeps the viewer guessing, but in a way we are not confused.

Artistic storytelling 10/10

With in this film, sound and light come to play a big part artistically in the way the story is told. The actual explosion in the film finds its way into Oppenheimer’s most emotional parts. This is shown through light and sound as the “real” world moves around Robert J. Oppenheimer. There are two perspectives in this film and the secondary is in black and white, it both adds to this perspective and lets the viewer know what is going on who's eye are we “seeing” the world through. Oppenheimer also has these beautiful representations of quantum mechanics, this lets the viewer what is in Robert J. Oppenheimer’s head. This creates a film that is artsy but not unapproachable. 

Writing 10/10  

When writing these characters, one of the things that could have been a struggle is that these people on screen were real people. It is hard to create real and unique characters that had real world counterparts, and lived real lives. However, this does not change how real a raw these characters felt. The relationships were not perfect, were not “couple goals” but you cold fall in love with them. What made this writing perfect: the ending was perfect, and so was the beginning.  Some lines touched my soul where it was the opening, the ending, the emotional struggle in between. The writing also lets the dialogue step aside and lets the artistic storytelling shine.

Acting 9/10

the same problem that could have hinder the writing of the characters is face in the acting of characters, but it did not what ever these actors did to bring these characters to life solved that. These characters felt like alive, real, raw people. Cillian Murphy was amazing as Robert J. Oppenheimer, he depicted his fear so well. He also made me want to sit in one of Oppenheimer’s class, how he depicted Oppenheimer love of physics was almost contagious. However, I feel the uses of lots of big name actors as possibly a crutch. Yes they are good actors but are they good actors because of their name, for me this was the casting of Robert Downey jr as Lewis Strauss. 

Adaptability 5/10

this is how well it can an adept to different people and if it is approachable. can people relate to it?

this is where Oppenheimer fails. Why? Let's start with the obvious, this is not a relatable film, and not all good films are. It is about a very heavy topic, and its contend warning are about suicide, sex scenes, alcohol, swearing which gives it a rating of R or MA this stops it from puling in younger viewers. All that aside, it is 3 hours long. Oppenheimer is not part of a big series, cinematic universe, has a brand or any other kind of granted viewership. Frankly, the reason I think people are going to see it is because of its Internet discords with the Barbie movie, and that was the reason I saw it too. 

“The secret sauce” 10/10

for me, the distinction between awful to bad to mid to great to amazing to “the best” small details that really matter to me and are purely personal preference.

I could write an essay about Oppenheimer, and I would enjoy writing about the rhetoric used by Christopher Nolan in his directing and writing. Whether about how I see this as our generation's reintroduction it the horrors of the atomic bomb or the Prometheus story and how it is used in this film to talk about how society sees genius and what it gives the rest of humanity. This is some that I find comes with any piece of film I love, but so much more with this film in particular.

[abyssalaerlocke]

honestly you're so real for the Halsin/Tara post. I'm too scared to like it and I'm paranoid enough that I turned on my VPN to send this ask bc I live in fear of antis. But Tara passes the Harkness Test: Intelligent, able to communicate, and mature for her species. I'm half tempted to write a short anonymous fic because ugh I'm kind of obsessed. Imagine this:

Tara is in heat and the camp is going insane. She's yowling at all hours, nobody can sleep, and Gale is getting worried about her wandering off and mating with a random stray tomcat (act 3)(i don't know if tressym can have kittens with regular cats but whatever).

Seeing everyone get increasingly grumpy, bickering over nothing, and even performing badly in their battles, Halsin realises he is uniquely equipped to take care of the situation. And he is nothing if not resourceful.

He's not sure of etiquette on this, but he decides it's best to approach Gale for permission, so as not to find himself on the receiving end of a fireball when he finds out.

Gale, in his typical fashion, is incredulous, flustered, and altogether out of his depth. He eventually concedes it's for the best, acknowledging her capacity to consent.

He approaches Tara in his elf form, scritching her while they have a brief chat about it - she accepts his offer without hesitation. He wildshapes into a cat, and... well. The rest is perhaps best saved for...... not here.

Anyway thank you for this delightful little brainworm. my ADHD meds kicked in while I was rotating them in my brain so I had to get some word vomit out there!

Honestly between everyone being on board with bards bangin' dragons (in dragon form), the bear scene, countless fics of werewolves in wolf form and ones with just-dogs, with the feline displacer beast, and catgirl/boy phenomenon — I think the defining issue that separates this from all of that is size. The fact that neither partner can be in humanoid form for it to work, crosses a line for most people.

Same goes for me — not as a squick, just generally disinterest. I'm on board with that being an aspect of their relationship, but personally more interested in thinking about Tara curled up on the back of Halsin's big, fluffy, bear form.

But hey, when the muse hits ya ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ fiction is a good outlet, that like all the violent video games and media, lets us address things in a medium that isn't hurting anyone.

I think the biggest issue for me is consent during heat — it's something that generally turns me away from a lot of omegaverse and sex pollen fics these days. If inclined, you could make tressyms' heat less severe, or Tara's interest in Halsin discussed beforehand. He would have smiled, comfortable with the naturalness of it and flattered, without really considering indulging her at the time.

I know the mentioned WIP was Tara transforming into a human, instead of the other way around, and I'd probably go for Tabaxi or one of the other feline humanoids in DnD.

I have a brainworm of Cazador not doing the black mass, but Gale "prodigy archwizard, chosen of Mystra" Dekarios of Waterdeep is regarded by many as "the man who'll become a god". Cazador hears how Gale talks about his beloved tressym, and to earn his favour and hopefully aid one day, custom breeds some tabaxi/owlin or something — basically humanoid tressyms. And so Astarion and his siblings are basically a litter of these, and Astarion gets gifted to Gale — who was entranced, but mostly just accepted to get him out of Cazador's hands.

They pursue a relationship on their own prerogative, but Tara is very cross Gale abandoned the other poor tressym-adjacent victims of Cazador. So they go on an adventure, tracking down Astarion's siblings, who have been sold off, escaped, rescued... They find them in varying dynamics with other characters from canon. Dalyria helps Halsin as an apprentice healer in the grove, Leon is an employee for Grand Duke Wyll Ravengard, Aurelia's with Karlach, etc.

[tatiekfuji]

Revealing the brilliance of Denny Ja’s elected work 32: “With love, I have to fight for you”

In the world of Indonesian literature, the name Denny Ja is familiar. The writer, lecturer, and also this politician has scored many works that are widely known by the community. One of his latest works that should be revealed by his brilliance is the 32nd of a series of essay poems entitled “With Love, I Must Fall You”. In this article, we will thoroughly explore this 32nd Denny JA selected work and see what makes it so special.    First, let’s look at Denny JA’s approach in writing this essay poem. In “with love, I have to fight yourself”, Denny JA takes a very personal approach. He described his own life experience and presents a character that has a background and life journey that is similar to him. This approach makes the reader feel a very strong emotional depth in every story presented.    In addition, Denny Ja also uses very rich and charming language. He is able to describe every scene in a very detailed and give a clear picture of the moods and feelings of the characters in the story. The language used also feels very natural and easy to understand, so that makes the reader feel like he is directly involved in the story he is reading.    Apart from the writing style, “with love, I have to fight yourself” also offers an interesting and meaningful story. Denny Ja is able to raise social issues that are relevant to daily life, such as friendship, love, and sacrifice. He presents stories that inspire and make the reader reflect on the meaning of life.    Of course, it is undeniable that the 32nd -elected work of Denny Ja also has advantages in terms of story structure. Denny Ja is able to manage the storyline well and maintain consistency from beginning to end. Every story in this essay poem has a tense peak of conflict and satisfying resolution. This makes the reader continue to be captivated and cannot stop reading until the end.    In addition, in “with love, I have to fight yourself”, Denny Ja also uses intelligent storytelling techniques. He is able to deliver deep messages in a simple and easy to understand way. He also uses dialogue that is alive and interesting, thus making the story more lively and attract the attention of the reader.    Not only that, this essay poem also presents a very strong character and has a unique personality. Denny Ja is able to describe every character in great detail and give them a real life. The reader cannot not feel connected to them and feel like they are part of the story.    In the end, “With love, I have to fight yourself” is a great work from Denny Ja. He is able to combine the power of language, interesting stories, and strong characters in an unforgettable essay poem. This work shows the brilliance of Denny Ja as a writer and tells a story that can touch the heart and influence the reader. For literary lovers, this essay poem is a mustRead and will bring them in an unforgettable emotional journey.    Thus, “With love, I have to fight yourself” is a real proof that Denny Ja is one of the best Indonesian writers. He is able to produce an attractive, inspiring, and able to move the reader’s heart. The 32nd brilliance of Denny Ja’s elected work deserves a thumbs up and is a clear proof that Indonesian literature is not inferior to literature from other countries. Congratulations to Denny Ja for this extraordinary work, and hopefully he will continue to produce extraordinary work in the future.

Check in full: reveal the brilliance of the 32nd selected work of Denny JA: “With Love, I Must Fall You”

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: Silver Lady by Mary Jo Putney

3/5. 1`1/28/2023.

Vibes: light magic, amnesia, found family, and a generally fluffier touch.

After being adopted off the streets as a child, the paranormally gifted Bran Tremayne returns to Cornwall on commands from the Home Office. There, he meets the amnesiac Merryn, whose past could hold the key to the mystery he's investigating. Caught between threatening forces, Merryn has no choice but to trust Bran in her efforts to recover her memories and stop a dangerous plot.

This one was very.... meh. I could see the quality of the writing (to an extent--I have my quibbles) and I can definitely see how, for a reader who really loves fluffier books, this will fit the bill. While I can definitely get down with fluff, this took it a bit far for the basic premise, and I found it tonally jarring.

Quick Takes:

--Like I said, I can see that Putney (who I've never read before) has. a very distinct style, and it's clear why she's a popular, longstanding writer. There's a uniqueness to it, and she has a strong, distinct voice. If you like a really bouncy tone, this may be for you. And I did appreciate the aspects of found family; I'm a sucker for "group of kids taken off the street by a wealthy family", and this does execute that component well.

--The way the magic is woven into the story is quite light. Essentially, the former street kids all have these supernatural gifts, which are sort of like... overblown natural talents, with a paranormal edge. I didn't mind the paranormal being on the lighter side. It's definitely something you can see more of in old school books. But she definitely could've gone a little further (and a little more adventurous) with it.

--Part of why the paranormal aspect, and the general story, didn't quite hit for me was that the lightness of the tone really doesn't gel with the plot. You've got mystery, you've got magic. And while you can definitely take a light approach there, this is just. So light! At points, I felt like the subject matter warranted a bit more intensity, a bit more depth. It reminded me of some Julia Quinn books I've read, where it's like--this is kind of dark subject matter, and I think the writing needs to reflect that?

--Because of the generally shallow tone, the leads also come off as pretty flawless. For me, this is very boring. Everyone was really... to quote a show with a stronger paranormal edge, perfectly splendid. This made it so, while I could see Bran and Merryn's chemistry, I really didn't connect with them individually, or their romance.

--A random writing note: Putney uses "!" in a lot of places it really doesn't belong, especially in Merryn's dialogue. I found that kind of distracting.

The Sex:

It's present, but damn if it isn't very, very euphemistic. And you know, I enjoy some euphemistic writers, and I can definitely enjoy it when it's a part of, say, an 80s romance that has a generally flowery style. But in 2023, when you're writing a sex scene this flowery and this euphemistic (and brief) you really might as well just skip the whole scene and keep it closed door. Like, we're not even talking, like "knot of flesh", we are talking "her most sensitive place". I wasn't into it.

Again, I can see why Putney has loyal readers. The vibe just didn't work for me, and it's a shame, because I think the concept itself is so intriguing.

Thanks to Kensington and Netgalley for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[ardn631camrynsenescall]

Week 9 Questions

What and who will you portray? Me acting out the struggles of dyslexia

What might you communicate visually through the concept of portrayal? I want to communicate that sometimes people may not look like they are struggling on the outside because they are shy or don't want to ruin a mood, so they hide their pain by being fine or joking about themself to others, but really they are not so good. and for me this is my dyslexia.

What is your position on your subject matter? my position is that it is something that I have always struggled with.

What is your voice? I just want it to be more talked about because most people don't really understand how hard it actually is to have dyslexia and all the emotions that come with it.

What is unique about your subject or your approach to it? The approach I am taking on this shoot is very personal, it's not anyone else's feelings it's how I have lived my life and how I feel on the inside on a day-to-day bases

What do you have unique access to? an experience people don't understand, I also have my report to project it it's a written report about all my struggles and test scores, and things to be doing to try to help me do better in school and life, which I want to project on to me for my photoshoots.

Consider the important role the title takes in communicating your intention and how audiences might ‘read’ the book. What is your working title?   my current working title is 'point of veiw' I like this because it is my point of view of my situation. I also wanted to spell the way I would normally spell the word view. or I was thinking I could look at some of the titles or short sentences in the report and use that. and lastly, I was thinking 'personally...' as if I am talking about myself but the book speaks for itself.

What would you like readers to think and feel? a glips into my life and the struggles that they may not understand

What is the role of the text within the book? I want to limit the amount of text in my work because that defeats the purpose as I am very bad at writing and communicating, but I do want small amounts to help the audience understand better.

How many shoots do you require to gain adequate coverage and successfully tell the story?  after my first shoot, I got so much content but I want to do a few more just so that I can explore a bit more and try to get more depth of field

Do you need gear and support with your shoots? I loaned a projector and a tripod so that I can project my report onto me

What is your plan? To take as many photos as possible and blog everything, I need to do a few more photo shoots.

What software and workflow will you use to edit, process, collate and design your photobook PDF? I'm shooting in Raw so I edit in that and on Photoshop in the Adobe suite and I'm using Indesine for the book.

What is your research plan?  my research plan is to look at other photo books to see their layout and other ideas.

What other photobooks have you looked at? Ciprian honey cathedral Raymond Meeks and Photographs 1997 – 2017 Hannah Starkey.

Are there decisions that have yet to be made? what is the final outcome of the images I will use if I will edit the green color out of the image?

[ghoulsgraveyard]

Fright Night

Summary: it's the fall of 86 and after months of preparation you are ecstatic to be doing the character work for Hawkins greatest horror fest, Fright Night. You’ve created hundreds of monsters for the scare actors lucky enough to land this gig, and everything is going to plan… except for a really detailed costume… one you didn’t do.

Or: it’s morbius eddie. More like Demobat vampire eddie but I think calling it morbius is funnier.

a/n: I couldn’t decide which pov I should write this from but I had the idea while sitting in bed and as someone studying wig and makeup design in college I got excited about my own idea. Besides the point: I can make a part two if you guys are interested where I go more in depth about the edster and how this came to be about?

Hawkins Indiana, if the color beige took physical form, you’re pretty sure it would be something similar to Hawkins Indiana. Hawkins was boring, Hawkins was dull, Hawkins wasn’t anything special or unique, it was like any other small town in the midwest. Which is exactly why you jumped to call the number listed on the job offer section of your college’s paper. The organizers of the listed event reaching out to an art school looking for creative minds only confirmed what you already knew: The midwest went crazy for Halloween.

It worked out perfectly, your love of horror stories and fantasy meant you already had an arsenal of creatures in mind and now you’re being provided with your favorite canvas: the human body.

You had grossly over-packed, not knowing what would be provided or if you liked the tools they supplied, your designated area was overflowing with drawings, notes, grease paints, makeup wipes and enough sponges to soak up a small pond. Everything was covered in a faint dusting of now dried hairspray from your demonstrations. It was a few hours until the gates opened up, and the half costumed scare actors in broad daylight asking about your vision was something you hadn’t expected to love so much.

Finally seeing each actor before they spread out to their respective areas was so rewarding, each monster you had crafted, brought to life and animated before you. Tireless nights with makeup artists and costume designers crafting the elaborate pieces and working on the final details paid off. Each actor flawlessly embodied the creatures you knew so intimately.

About an hour after the gates opened you decided to go on a walk, see your work in action. Frightened screams filled your ears and you smiled softly in pride. Towards the edge of the forest which surrounded the event you heard a whimper. You shook it off, maybe you were hearing things, until you heard a voice rasp “help…. Me. please” a labored gasp “please help me”

You’ve seen this before in movies, you’ve read it before in books, you’ve heard about it before in scary stories told by campfires. You knew how this would end. You would go help the seemingly weak and injured being secluded in the woods, and it would end up killing you.

But

But the voice wavering sounded too real, and this was real life so you likely wouldn’t get killed, the worse that happened would be you get scared but this person could be in danger, they sounded in pain. You still had to be smart about this. This was a terrible idea. You start forward very slowly “Can you walk?” You’re not exactly sure how much you want to go into those woods yet you continue to approach despite the pit in your stomach.

You hear a few grunts, likely the sound of standing up, a small exhale that you had the feeling was as much of a chuckle as they could muster “maybe? We’re, we’re about to find out” they choked through their words. You heard a twig snap, then a drag, pained whimpers and hisses until a figure began to take shape in the yellow street lamps. Haggard breaths grew louder and lurched steps, the cadence of which was more similar to that of a propelled falling than a walk, brought this being forward.

Long dark hair, matted and crowned in twigs and moss. Pale sheet white skin made the dirt and tattoo ink stand out. Ripped and muddied clothes. Gaping wounds on his abdomen. Huge wings, the span of which had to be at least 12 feet from end to end. Bruised, bloodied, battered and bat winged, his costume was incredible.

You were floored, you didn’t remember putting this together, wings like those must have taken him weeks to make, the look seemed to be a take on the classic vampire. You gasped. He panicked “Look I know how I might look-” “incredible” you cut him off “you look incredible! How did you do this? The pale look on your face was it airbrushed? Powdered? It looks too natural to be grease paint, and the clothes, how did you make them look so naturally distressed? And the obvious thing here, the wings! Those must have taken months!”

He tilted his head, eyes squinted in confusion “what?” he said, voice still weak, it was then you remembered why you were there “oh my god I’m so sorry I completely forgot that you're hurt. Uhm, okay uh” you paused trying to plan “okay so, there’s a place towards the center of the park I guess? I don't know what to call this place, which is so not the point and I'm getting off track. I’ll get you in there and then I can help you in better lighting with actual medical tools, let’s start walking” he immediately seemed nervous “how many people?” he struggled to walk without pain, to which you held your arm out in offer to take some pressure off whatever was hurting his gait. You weren’t sure if it would help but he seemed to move a bit better with you helping. “How many people? Like here right now? Well probably over three hundred since it’s halloween-” he stopped walking. “It’s… it’s halloween?” his eyes seemed watery, his breathing picked up and had you been paying more attention you would have noticed that you couldn't see his breath even with the cold.

“Yeah buddy, it’s halloween. Let's get you to that first aid place alright?” he nodded silently, you decided to fill the silence. “It really sucks that we have to keep the first aid place as stocked as we do, well I mean it doesn’t suck now obviously because you need it but the reasoning behind it does.”

he hummed, indicating you go on “a lot of the times park goers will attack the scare actors because they’re frightened, or to prove that they’re sooo macho to their girlfriends. And then these people who were just doing their jobs get hurt for no good reason.” there’s a pause “that’s what happened to you right? Someone got scared because of your costume and they ‘fought back’ against you even though you posed no threat in the first place?” he threw his head back and barked out a laugh then let out “fuck! Laughing hurts, but uh yeah. You kind of got it right on the mark there.”

As you neared the center the stranger got tons of compliments on his costume, he seemed shocked at this reaction, you decided not to comment on it, just kept looking forward “so stranger, what's your name?” you asked, holding the tent’s makeshift door open. “E- I’m Kas” He seemed to cut himself off “You can call me Kas.” he nodded, seemingly more to himself than you, and if you had a good look at his face when he was talking, you might have noticed the fangs that seemed to get longer as he entered a room full of cuts.

[mt-words]

Can we get some dream smp fandom positivity posts? As someone who posts mostly analysis and has never once had someone say anything rude in response, I think we perceive the fanbase as more toxic than it is because of a few outspoken individuals. Y'all are pretty chill and I like you.

In no particular order-

I love that Eret’s fans come up with such cool theories, I swear she could give you two sentences of lore and I could see three five page essays on what it could mean about their character within an hour and each of them is unique, intricate, and makes logical sense.

I love the compilations Foolish fans make of him doing ridiculous things on stream, he’s a fun guy that never fails to make me laugh and everything I see from them embodies that energy to me.

I love how creative Hannah’s fans are, you take the awesome ideas she has and turn them into the most amazing designs and concepts.

I love that Techno’s fans might write a ten page essay about his character or just say they enjoy watching him do crime, and you never know which it will be because both come from the same people.

I love how Philza’s fans embrace everything he does with so much enthusiasm. His chat is a flock of crows? Excellent, they can work with that, you will see fifty incredible pieces of art and a hundred theories in the first hour and they’re just getting started.

I love that Niki’s fans are so careful to pay attention and not miss any details. It has been ages and I still see occasional mentions and theories about the “Dear Friend” letter.

I love that Fundy’s fans are very empathetic, they love to find and elaborate on the connections between characters and that’s pretty cool!

I love Tommy’s fans for their energy. They seem passionate about making things right and hopeful that no matter what your situation is things can get better. I’ve seen so many breathtakingly emotional art pieces from this side of the fandom.

I love that George’s fans unapologetically simp for him but then catch me off guard by making deep insights about his character.

I love how Bad’s fans are as genuinely sweet as he is, they’re willing to really look at everything that makes up a character and see the tragedy of it and have compassion about things. And some just want to see an egg rule the server, c'mon, it would be funny.

I love the running gag with Skeppy fans of making Skeppy critical posts, y’all are hilarious.

I love how Purpled fans play up his lack of lore as him being an incredibly powerful cryptid, and they’re right. He totally carried the wither fight on Nov 16th.

I love the balance Quackity fans have between a love of humor, justice, and darker topics. I think like Quackity they are often underestimated and thought of as the jokester side of the fandom to an extent, and then I start reading things they write and it’s well thought out and insightful.

I love that Tubbo’s fans love chaos, cute things, or both to an unhealthy extent. Seeing anything from them reminds me of princess unikitty in all the best ways, and then they turn around and throw a super in depth meaningful analysis at me in the next breath.

I love everything about Sapnap’s fans. Y'all are perfect. The writing and art from the born in fire line? Gold.

I love how Jschlatt fans are generally chill and just enjoy whatever they want to. Their favorite Manburg president was the one who publicly executed his right hand man and gave Dream a resurrection book for firepower, and he looked good doing it.

I love that Callahan has fans. You people are dedicated and I respect it. The fact that Callahan was one of the first names to pop up when everyone was trying to figure out who Harpocrates was even though he rarely involves himself with plot? Your influence knows no bounds.

I love that Alyssa’s fans are simply too powerful. She hasn’t played on the smp since way before I started watching and there are still people defending her barn and drawing pictures of her.

I love that Antfrost’s fans have taken so many ideas and just ran with them and made them awesome. Like him practicing magic? Perfect, he now carries potions and gets a wizard hat.

I love that Dream fans look at a character who has been portrayed as pure evil from many points of view and understand that Everyone has motives based on their situation, even if it isn’t handed to us in an easily understood way.

I love how Jack’s fans are so ready to support any action he takes. Crawling out of hell? Incredible. Killing a child? Good for him! Go team Rocket. Grieving the same child? Learning healthy coping, he’s the coolest.

I love that Connor eats Pants fans are the most reasonable people in this fandom. This is terrifying. Thank you for your service, you always make me smile.

I love that Punz fans unapologetically just love their capitalist mercenary. As they should, his presence always tips the scales and everything he does brings more depth to the characters and plots he interacts with.

I love how much Ranboo fans love complexity. Most of them aren’t afraid to admit that their favorite characters are flawed, because aren’t those flaws what make them interesting and relatable?

I love the variety of Hbomb fans. Half of them may be embracing the cat maid bit while the other half goes on about how impactful and cool L’cast is, but they’re all super chill.

I appreciate that Puffy fans take the time to understand so many perspectives. So many posts I see involving her tie in lore from other characters and find interesting ways to connect them and build them together, kind of like Puffy herself.

I love that Wilbur fans seem to approach the story like they’re solving a puzzle, carefully piecing together details from months apart to figure out how and why everything goes down.

I love how hard Ponk fans work to spread awareness of how awesome he is. Ponk says and does wonderful things and is very fun to watch. I never would have tried his content without them.

I love that Karl fans saw him wanting to be involved and started coming up with such cool ideas around his character that they actually made them canon. Correct me if I’m wrong, wasn’t the time traveler thing a fan theory at first?

I love the creativity Sam fans have with his design and their willingness to discuss complex moral issues. Sam is involved in some heavy lore stuff but he and his fans keep things entertaining and calm.

I’m sure I missed some things, please feel free to add on!

[anauro]

hi roc!! i finally have the time and emotional capacity to type my very long "Thoughts" re: dass into your ask box :) i sent you the previous ask right after finishing my reread and i kid you not -- life immediately dipped right after. sooooo, here i am. a few days late :[[ -------------- 1) Regulus as a doctor. Okay, OKAY. I cannot tell you how much i appreciate the way you've written regulus as a doctor. Dass!Regulus -- through representation -- provides such an honest insight into some of the pits of most healthcare systems. I've never gotten to see the depth in his characterization as a doctor until MY sister started having trouble with hers. There is one flaw to regulus as a doctor that i think shines: The way he falls back on textbook knowledge when it comes to james. It's such a good and well thought out flaw. He likens, the hit of nicotine from a cig to that of what james usually takes -- or at least thinks they're somewhat comparable. And james finds this amusing. He refuses to acknowledge the doctor in charge of the clinic concerning James' dental visit. He falls back to what he knows as hard facts through what he's learned in med school, thinking it simply is the most logical approach, when simple, rigid, textbook knowledge often lack/s important insight. what happens? james ends up in pain much, much, faster than he should've had. when james was clearly struggling with withdrawal, the way regulus simply offered anti-sickness medicine and paracetamol to james just. felt. so. off. detached? and i know, in that particular scene, it may also have something to do with his and james' early relational distance. but, it does, very much tie into the fact that regulus, even with all his medical knowledge, has much to understand regarding james' needs and current condition. he thinks the science is "sciencing" but it's not. the thing is, regulus isn't stupid! gosh he's so far from that. and you've continuously established reg's prodigal skills. aside from him being a junior anaesthetist, dass!regulus simply mirrors today's reality. we see doctors as great scholars. surrounded by all that knowledge, sometimes it's hard for them to see how what they know, isn't always enough. they're not all-knowing. and for the science to science -- you need insight and empathy. otherwise, there can be observational gaps. for doctors, it's a tight line they have to walk between asserting their professional knowledge and, well, taking into account a patient's unique needs. when they lean far too much on the former it's the patient who suffers.

i think, the way you've taken the time to write regulus out this way is so... very cool of you. i wish i could've noticed much sooner. P.S. this ask was supposed to have more than one item but -- hehe i've made this one wayyyyyy too long!! sorry T^T i do believe that i have to send this one out first ~

Hiya!

Omg, thank you so much for popping back!! 🫶🏼 I do hope life picked up again now 🤞🏼

This answer turned out to be a bit long so I’m gonna put it under the cut and content warn it as addiction talk and inequalities in healthcare (also pls do not reblog)

So yeah, doctor Regulus and addict James really can be summarised as “science isn’t sciencing”. You’re right, Regulus is smart and not just smart enough to be a doctor, but one of the smartest in his hospital (I think it’s Marlene who mentions it that he’s the youngest to pass the exams and anaesthetics is known for having the hardest exams) and yet James puts him in his place really easily.

Regulus tries to break down James’ problems into biteable chunks and fails to realise that’s not how James experiences it. He doesn’t want anything for the nausea or the pain or the insomnia, and part of it is cause he genuinely doesn’t want to bother Regulus and doesn’t think he deserves help with these, but also that’s not what bothers James the most. He’s not gonna go and take drugs cause he’s vomiting, he’s gonna do it cause he can’t cope with the Harry situation, his parents, his crush on Regulus…. And Regulus’ sole reaction to it is “everybody has problems. Go to therapy.” Which is probably very reasonable and kind of what James needed to hear, but also does highlight Regulus’ lack of understanding of how people who struggle with addiction process things and deal with problems.

And James remarks on how Regulus already treats him better than doctors at the hospital did, whilst at the same time Regulus chastises himself for not being understanding enough. And as Regulus’ feelings towards James develops, he starts to compartmentalise James into his and addict, failing yet again to realise these two are the same person. Which. As you may have predicted, will cause issues further down the line as James can’t hide the addict side of himself deep enough.

But the overarching theme of doctors and other healthcare workers in all healthcare systems lacking to distinguish textbook knowledge from what’s in front of them is a huge topic and a sad one. It doesn’t affect just addiction, but also ethnic minorities, people with disabilities (ask any diabetic how easy it was to do their insulin whilst in a hospital and you’ll know) and members of the LGBT community, especially trans people. Ranging from basic nomenclature issues (only having F or M as gender or font on paperwork being too small or otherwise inaccessible for disabilities) to blunt oppression (not respecting pronouns, asking questions not related to current health needs).

I understand there’s only so much that can be taught at universities (or else the courses would be 10 years long lol) and just the pure clinical knowledge is heaps to learn, but I think that’s a poor excuse for not teaching healthcare workers basic empathy and understanding of challenges they might face whilst looking after patients outside of the “white, rich, able bodied and cishet” population.

Anyway, its a topic I could talk on forever and I don’t think anyone would be particularly interested, but the bottom line is: healthcare workers are amazing and brilliant people, but they need to constantly educate themselves on topics that are not pure science, but yet are inseparable part of their jobs. And the healthcare system should encourage that, both by providing resources as well giving time off to learn all those things and reward those who do. Needing to go to a hospital is stressful enough without having to worry about being, bluntly put, disrespected.

[latedawnwriting]

Hiii love! i saw u are taking requests so i was wondering if u can write a fluffy Josh imagine? something just really cute (like Josh wanting to say 'I love you' for the first time but being nervous) or something along those lines! It doesn't have to be anything specific <3

Thank you so much for the request sunshine <3. After reading your request I immediately got an idea, tried to write it really cute and fluffy. Hope you're having a wonderful day. Lots of love <3

~ Jules

"Happiness of the early morning sun"

Pairing: Josh Kiszka x Reader

Rating: Teen and up

Word count: 1080

Editing: by the wonderful @dannythedog (she's an amazing writer too!)

Warnings: lots of fluff <3

Rays of sunlight streamed in through the partially covered window. Flakes of glistening white fluff were flying from the sky. I couldn't take my eyes off the scenery, this was the first snow this year. “Josh...Josh...It’s snowing outside!” I tried to wake him up with a visible excitement. A few brown curls fell in front of his face. His mouth was slightly opened and only soft snoring could be heard in the room. The gentle rays of light made his complexion almost god-like. My heart felt so happy in that moment, everything seemed to be just perfect.

“Sweetheart, please, you need to see this,” I said softly, trying to wake him up again. His eyes started to open slowly, showing the golden brown irises that I loved so dearly. “What’s going on, mama?” he asked with a quiet, raspy morning voice. He then started to sit up, leaning his back against the headboard. “It’s snowing outside,” I said with a silly little smile.

“Did you really wake me up this early because you were excited at the sight of the snow? We’ve seen it hundreds of times,” the bedroom was graced with his laugh. “Yes! Look at the beauty of nature, it amazes me everytime.” I was met with an expression that I couldn’t quite recognize. I then got up from the comfy, warm bed and put his favorite hoodie on my pyjama's shirt.

The door leading out onto the terrace always creaked, it wasn't the weather's fault. A thin layer of snow was laying on the terrace. I smiled seeing how gloriously it reflected the rays of the sun. The morning air was very chilly, and easily pierced the two layers of clothing I was wearing. I ignored the shiver that was passing through my body, wanting at least for a moment to admire the majestic appearance of nature. Soon enough, my hands and face started turning red and I heard a loud voice in the distance. “Oh my god, Y/N, it's too cold! Come back!” I looked at Josh, who was standing by the terrace door. I approached him, slowly. He quickly grabbed my hand and pulled me inside the house, closing the door behind us. “Are you freaking crazy, darling?! You could have froze to death!” he stared at my red face with a serious expression. “Oh come on, it’s not like I was going to stand there for eternities. Just for a minute!” I snorted. A soft, warm pair of hands started to rub against my cold ones. “You’re gonna be the death of me, one day. I’m going to make us some hot coffee and maybe a breakfast,” the boy smiled at me with his pearly, straight teeth.

After the delicious breakfast Josh made us, we sat on the old living room couch watching some random morning talk show. I snuggled into his chest not really listening to what was going on the tv. His shirt had a unique smell. It was a mix of apple shower gel and lavender incense, the scent of which spread throughout my home, especially when Josh was spending his time with me. It was quickly becoming my favourite smell of all time, always reminding me of the happiness and pure bliss that this boy gave me.

I loved him with all my heart yet, I was too scared to even say one word about it. We knew each other for 4 years now and only just last year we grew the balls to admit that we had feelings for one another. He was my light in the dark, the strong force that pulled me from the depths of my sadness. I couldn’t get enough of him. Somehow, he always knew when something was wrong, always trying to solve my problems, to bring me happiness. I never knew how I deserved a person like him, it’s like some sick joke that the universe made. Instead of always bringing me bad things, I found him. My sunshine, Josh.

I smiled into his shirt and tried to get out of my mind to enjoy my time with him. “Can I tell you something, my darling?” I looked at his face and saw that expression again, whose meaning I still could not recognize. “Of course” I slowly replied, staring at his handsome face intently. “I.. I would like… I would like you to know..” his voice started stuttering, cheeks started turning bright red. I took his hands in mine, only to find that they were shaking slightly. I didn’t know what was going on, but he seemed to be really nervous. “It’s okay honey, you know you can tell me absolutely anything. I won’t be mad at you.” My eyes were showing him honesty. He looked at me nervously and then said something that surprised me immensely.

“I.. I love you with all my heart.” I looked at him like I’ve just seen a ghost, my mouth was opened just a bit. I didn't think he would ever say those words. In fact, I thought I would be the first. “I’m sorry... I…” he started. “God, I love you so much,” I interrupted him in mid-sentence. My eyes closed, I didn’t know what to do after that confession. Then I felt gentle, plump lips meeting my own, igniting millions butterflies in my stomach. My hand cupped his precious face, his skin hot from all the blushing. I didn’t open my eyes, I wanted this moment to last forever. We kissed slowly for a few moments, confessing our love without saying one word. I think we knew at that moment that that love didn’t need to be described in words.

After a while we had to pull apart, catching our breaths. “I’m so lucky to have you. You light up my whole day.” I hugged him tightly, his smell engulfing me again. Happy tears started welling up in my eyes, I sincerely couldn’t believe that something like this happened to me. “You saved me, Josh. I thought that I would never be able to be happy. You’re my sun and I love you.” He wiped the tears from my eyes with a palm of his hand. “I’ll always be here for you, mama. You’re my moon, always making me smile and I love you so much,” he smiled sweetly and I recognized his expression as love. With him by my side, I can fight with the struggles of the world outside.

~~~~

Hope you liked it <3

~ please like and reblog if you liked the story~