#as well as a bunch of other random celebrities and no actual voice actors for sonic lmao.

[sonknuxadow]

people who are worried about the future of the sonic movies and associated content always remember that even if the third movie ends up being really bad it could still be much worse because they were originally considering chris pratt for sonic

[runningonmarvel]

little things in hadestown

Act I

Andre de Shields taking ages and ages to start the show, with all eyes on him. As he should. We were all suspended in a moment of perfect tension, perfect silence, the moment before a song begins

And then he starts it with a smart little adjustment of his ridiculously shiny suit (with a feather on the lapel!)

At the end of Road to Hell, led by Andre, the entire cast and orchestra held an extended, extended note of singing and playing and hand waving (something like this “AGAINNNNNNN” for a full minute). It filled me with this longing and excitement to see this story, this hope that maybe it will turn out this time

The subtle (and not so subtle) ways that the actors portrayed how all attention turned to orpheus when he sang. It’s very cool how orpheus’s awkwardness/sensitivity exists in tandem with his power to command attention with his voice. Fits the myth and the new into one character 

Orpheus giving eurydice an ugly paper rose when he tries to woo her

The implication that orpheus is a waiter at this random tavern? 

As an example of point above: the use of tables and chairs in motion and lighting as orpheus sang his answers in Wedding Song, showing eurydice he was the real deal, essentially

The transformation from red napkin/cloth into rose. This first moment of the rose was delicate and lovely

Hades purposefully turning away when Persephone descended to the main stage for spring 

Persephone’s encouraging Eurydice to dance in living it up on top

Just before Reeve’s speech in Living it Up on Top, he pauses, and looks directly at Eva, and smiles this bright, amazing smile

And after he says “and the world we live in now,” the entire cast turns to look toward the audience. A moment of celebration and accountability for everyone 

They all drink after orpheus’s speech, and then Hermes veritably swoons/chokes from too much alcohol, and then reeve stamps the beat back in. Comical.

The beautiful dynamic between Reeve and Eva in All I’ve Ever Known, the fluidity of their movements and their singing, the grace of their love. Made all the more convincing by the fact that they are actually presumably in love

Also in all I’ve ever known and a couple other songs, reeve putting his arms around/over Eva’s shoulders while she’s on the ground, and her pulling him tight against her

Hades’s lame but somehow cool black shades??

Hades’s long, slow stare at Eva - like a hunter watching prey - after eurydice sings “kinda makes you wonder how it feels”

And then orpheus absolutely Jumps in front of eurydice to protect her. it tugged at my heartstrings, it did

Hades and persephone slowly descending into the underworld for wintertime - I think this was the first use of the elevator/descending circle platform, and it underscored that they were going down, to another realm, and that we would go there too. 

Also persephone’s proud, resigned upward glance most of the times she stands with hades. She’s always looking upward, to the sky

In chant, eurydice’s backpack and coat get ripped from her by the fates, leaving her alone, without anything left, without the spark of hope she needs

And Reeve off to the side of the stage scribbling in his notepad to write the song, but completely forgetting Eurydice (what was he writing? “La la la la la la la” a bunch of times??)

The innocent peace signs and naive little smiles from the fates on those three bell sounds in hey little songbird - as if they didn’t just take everything from eurydice

Eurydice’s singing in Hey Little Songbird was so, so well-phrased/acted. She sounded hungry, exhausted, like she could barely get any words out

And after Hades gave her the coins, she came to the front of the stage and held them over her eyes - a nod to Greek mythology and burial practice, and the coins as the toll to the underworld

The staging of Wait for Me was absolutely incredible, maybe the highlight of the entire show. The swinging light fixtures, the transition in lighting from above to underground, the OPENING of the stage behind him to reveal the mechanical piping and lighting and the wall. Especially because the stage opened as Reeve was at the highest moment of his song, all of the light shining down around him - fits so well with the myth of him singing a song that made the stones weep and part for him

At first, I was puzzled by the decision for why do we build the wall to end the second act, and not wait for me. Upon further deliberation I appreciate it, for mainly these reasons: 1) persephone gets to say “anybody want a drink” right before intermission, and 2) it establishes where we are going to be for act II (the underworld, duh), so that we are already oriented in the world for act II to begin, already deep in Eurydice’s plight

Act II

Persephone going in to kiss Hermes’s cheek and him sticking out her tongue at him and wiggling it around???

And persephone’s new black dress

All of persephone’s (Jewelle Blackman’s) mannerisms that expertly conveyed I AM DRUNK. very impressed by her ability to act that drunk and still nail every line and note. She was just doing her thing

Very cool use of lighting when Persephone declares “there’s a crack in the wall” (and in general). The cooler, white lighting represents the sky and the world above, and flashes when she sings it. But the harsh yellow-orange lighting of the underworld remains. These two play in contrast with each other throughout the show. It’s super cool.

Trombone guy. Obsessed

Eurydice’s new worker outfit when she emerges from Hades’s office

In flowers, Eva absolutely broke down. She was crying real tears. The person sitting next to me started crying too

Reeve running out from the audience aisle to get to Eva

The audience’s pitiful laughter when eurydice asks if orpheus heard her calling, and he just goes: “No”

Not gonna lie, when I saw hades without his coat on and with his sleeves rolled up, and he had a tattoo of a brick wall, I thought Patrick page just happened to have a brick wall tattoo. I have found out its part of his costume. Makes sense. I love it.

Eurydice and orpheus always sheltering in each other’s arms when Hades threatens them, always turning to each other

The moment after Papers and before If It’s True, when orpheus has been beaten and left alone (especially after he just tried to stand up to someone infinitely more powerful than him). Reeve stares offstage, the opposite direction of Eva, with a gut-wrenching expression that I can only describe as the loss of his innocence. And he takes the moment to process, to understand, while Eva stands shrouded in shadow, giving him space, away

And then also the slow tentativeness and guilt with which eurydice rejoins orpheus and the workers during If It’s true - she’s the last to stand in support, and you can see the pain written on her face the whole song

In How Long (one of my favorite songs off the soundtrack), the undeniable sense that these are gods, not to be messed with, gods with the world at their whims. Gods whose disagreements and desires can and will shape the lives of the humans beneath them

The absurdly bright flash of light and then immediate darkness as Hades sings “I control the electricity”

Hades looking extremely gratified (and commenting on it) when orpheus started singing about him

The expert use of the spinning stage. This goes for the whole show, but one particular moment I loved was when Hades was desperately trying to stop Orpheus from finishing his song, but it was too late, everyone had joined him, it was too late

This was a thing through the whole show: when he first started singing the la la la in Act I, orpheus’s voice shook, cracked, went too high. His la la las gradually grew stronger, more confident, more pure and smooth (as if he really was learning the song), until in this final, complete love song, he sounds beautiful 

Persephone extending her hand immediately when hades managed to sing a few note of the la la la. the love written on her face 

Hades summoning the rose ( I knew the rose would be an image in the play beforehand, but I had no idea the extent it would matter, and I loved its appearances)

Persephone and hades actually dancing together, in a hilarious, cute, heart-filling way. Hades real smiling for the first time in the entire play. And then the two of them coming to a stop in each others’ arms, caught in the motion of a slow sway

This isn’t a staging note, but I’m just overwhelmed by how beautiful and real of a love song promises is

When Hades describes how doubt comes in when men are left alone, without the women they love - I caught vividly the parallel between orpheus and himself, how his own doubt and loneliness drove him to this tyranny 

Hades detailing his plan to Hermes, and Hermes, as the only one aware of how this song is going to end, giving a slow, resigned, stoic nod

“We’ll try again next spring” always seemed to me like a disappointment for persephone in the recording, but the way it’s staged, as a moment of closeness between persephone and hades, it comes across more like a bit of hope - that this time, they can recover themselves and their love 

The little motions between the chorus members/workers when they decide they’re coming (two held hands, the others nodded to each other)

Orpheus nervously adjusting the guitar strap as he walked out of hell, trying to reassure himself that he can make it

And his facial expressions as doubt took over - excruciating 

The lighting design in Doubt Comes in! amazing. At points, I started to doubt if Eurydice was really walking behind him. The darkness shrouds everything except Orpheus. He’s alone

The workers holding the shoulders of the person in front of them as they walked out of hell 

The overworld coming back together (superb set design) as Orpheus takes his final few steps, and then—

The literal GASPS from the audience when he turned around. Even though we all knew it was going to happen, there’s still that little moment of hope, that flame

The absolute agony of eurydice’s crying as she’s taken below ground. The absolute joy when she frolics back on stage in the final number, ready to begin the story anew

The cast raising cups with the Ukraine flag on them during their final bow and We Raise Our Cups

[silverbyeol]

When We Collide - Tom Holland

Summary: A close encounter with death, brings on a new relationship (This summary sucks, but I don’t want to give anything away) 

Author’s Note: Not sure if this classifies as angst, but the ending is kind of sad... but lots of fluff all throughout! 

Word Count: 3.6K

“That’s a wrap for today everyone, have a good day and I’ll see you all on Friday,” the male producer said, there was some light mumbling throughout the cast and everyone disbursed soon after.

“Hey, Tom!” yelled a male voice, stopping the brunette in his tracks, “Would you like to hang out with us? We’re going to grab some drinks at a pub?” Tom looked over at the owner of the voice, one of his co-stars.

“I would, but I already have plans for today. Definitely next time,” the male replied with a smile. Truth be told, Tom didn’t really have any important plans. They were shooting a movie in London and all Tom wanted to do was walk around and enjoy the feeling of being home for a while.

The male walked into his trailer and changed out of the outfit he wore on set and into something more comfortable, jeans and a plain white t-shirt. He checked himself out in the mirror and, before leaving the set, put on a black cap and dark shades, to mask his identity. It was nice to get away from fame and responsibilities for a while and just lead a somewhat normal life.

The streets of London were always busy with people walking about, minding their business, and tourists snapping pictures of every nook and cranny. The weather was gloomy today and there was really no reason to wear shades outside. He probably looked crazy, but Tom went unrecognized as he made his way towards his favourite cafe- ready to enjoy some afternoon tea and maybe even read a book. The cafe was located in a part of London that was rarely crowded. The brunette turned a corner, and there it was; the cafe was standing just across the street. He stopped at the pedestrian crossing, waiting for the signal to turn green.

On the other side of the street stood a young female. She had a pair of over-ear headphones on and wasn’t really paying attention to her surroundings. The male looked her over, admiring how cute she was. She had a black and white striped top on, paired with black cargo jeans, and a black Nike duffle bag across her chest. She looked as if she was coming back from the fitness center. The light turned green for them to cross and the female looked both ways to make sure there were no other cars. She quickly looked back at her phone, missing the vehicle that was speeding down the road.

Everything moved so fast. She was about to get hit and without thinking, the male took off running towards her, ready to push her out of the way. Everything started moving in slow motion and for a split second, he saw her eyes widen with fear as she looked up from her phone and noticed the situation unfolding. Tom quickly grabbed the girl's waist, lunging the two onto the ground, right in front of the coffee shop.

‘This definitely hurts less at the studio…’ he thought and fluttered open his eyes, meeting fearful e/c ones.

“Are you okay?” the female asked as she lay on top of Tom.

“I’m fine. No big deal,” he grunted out. It was actually a big deal… His head and back hurt from the fall and his hands were scraped from sliding on the concrete. “Are you okay?” he in turn asked her as he scanned her face for any injuries.

“I’m fine… I- ermm…” she stuttered and quickly got off the males body, sitting down on the ground next to him, “Thank you- I don’t- Everything just happened so fast…” she said with a shaky voice as if the events finally hit her. The car was long gone and there were no other people walking by as the incident occured.

“What a bloody arsehole, he shouldn’t have been going so fast,” Tom said and frowned. The female's things were all over the ground and right in the middle of them were his sunglasses. His eyes met with the girls, yet she seemed to not recognize that he was famous, “Are you hurt? Should we go to the hospital?” he questioned, concerned about her well-being.

“I’m alright. Thank you… I’m not sure how I could ever repay you for saving my life… you even got hurt,” she said as she studied his scraped hands.

“There’s no need. What’s your name?”

“Y/n.” she answered and the couple stood up from the ground.

“I’m Tom. Pleasure.” he replied, looking into her eyes for any sign of recognition, but nothing.

“Can I at least buy you a cuppa or coffee?” she asked and motioned towards the shop. Tom warmly smiled at her.

“Sure.” The two grabbed their things and collected themselves before going into the shop.

“Welcome! What can I get started for you two?” asked the barista. Tom and the female awkwardly approached the counter.

“I’ll have a flat white, please,” the female by his side said.

“Two of those,” Tom added. Y/n started digging in her bag, most likely looking for her wallet.

“10 pounds.” the barista said and Tom swiftly handed the barista the orange/brown coloured bill.

“Wait… what are you-” Y/n said in confusion.

“Let’s go sit down,” Tom interrupted and led the two towards an empty table.

“You’re way too kind…” Y/n said when the pair sat down. Tom chuckled.

“Making you pay wouldn’t be very gentlemanly of me.” the female smiled at him and the barista came over to the table, setting down two small cups.

“Thank you.” they both said and Y/n picked up the cup and took a small sip, making Tom stare. Being a celebrity, he never had meaningful conversations with strangers. Everyone either wanted a photo or autograph, so it was hard for the male to make connections with regular people.

“What's up with the shades?” she asked, hoping to see more of the strangers' faces.

“Oh....” Tom mumbled and took off his glasses and cap. There was no one in the shop besides the pair, it was fangirl free, “It’s a habit.”

“Makes you look kind of dodgy...”

“Does it…?” he mumbled more to himself than the girl. She looked more calm than before as if the incident was long forgotten. He picked up his mug and took a sip of the hot liquid. Y/n took a second to examine the male. He had brown hair and a pair of matching brown eyes. His baby face made him look like a puppy. He was cute. Her eyes traveled to his arms, they were slightly veiny, he was most likely fit and worked out a lot. Her eyes looked at his hands that were red and had scratches from the fall.

“Tell me about yourself,” Tom said, wanting to keep the mood light.

“Me? I’m honestly not that interesting…” she said and looked down at her lap, “I’m a ballet dancer, I don’t really have time for much else…” she continued, picking up Tom’s interest.

“You dance? I took ballet classes when I was a child. I was even in the Billy Elliot musical-” Tom said and suddenly felt nervous. (Y/n) didn’t seem to know who he was. It was nice to be normal and treated like a regular human, not a famous actor, “when I was in secondary school,” he added.

(Y/n) looked up with interest, “I didn’t realize you were done with school… you look so young,”

“I’m actually 24,” Tom said. The female looked at him with wide eyes.

“You look so young…” she repeated and Tom took another sip of his coffee, “Did the ballet thing work out for you or are you pursuing different things?” This was Tom’s chance to tell the female that he was a famous actor.

“No, I decided to do other things,” he started. He decided that he liked the feeling of being unknown, “I work on movie sets… bunch of random things, honestly.”

“That’s cool. Do you get to meet a lot of celebrities?”

“Yeah… you could say that.”

The two sat in the coffee shop until the sky turned dark, talking about anything and everything. The longer the two talked, the more Tom started to fancy the female. Despite what she thought, she was interesting and very kind. He never met someone like her, and he definitely wanted to keep getting to know her.

“It’s almost 9…” she said with a tired sigh, “I should get going. I have rehearsals in the morning.”

“I should get going too…” Tom said, slightly disappointed…

“Despite the circumstances, it was so nice to meet you, Tom. Thank you for saving me.” she said and started getting up. He didn’t want their conversation to end, if she let him, Tom wanted to keep in touch with the female.

“Wait!” he called out and she looked at him, sitting back down, “Do you mind if I get your number? I would love to take you out on a date, or just hang out,” there was a hopeful gleam in his eyes.

“Ummm… yeah- of course…” (Y/n) felt her cheeks get warm. It’s been a while since someone asked her for her number or even asked her out on a date. Tom gave her his phone and she typed her number in.

“Have a goodnight, (Y/n).”

“Have a goodnight, Tom.”

Tom could not concentrate on set. All he could think about was the girl with the e/c coloured eyes. After the encounter, Tom texted the female that night to make sure she made it home safe. Ever since, they’ve been sending messages back and forth constantly. He wanted to take the girl out on a proper date, but that was slightly difficult. Public spaces meant lots of potential fangirls and the male was not ready to reveal his status yet.

“Holland!” yelled a strict male voice making Tom come out his daydream.

“Sir?”

“What’s the matter with you?” the director asked, annoyed that they had to reshoot the same scene for the fifth time.

“Sorry… I’ve got a lot on my mind.” he replied, making the director sigh in defeat.

“Alright. Why don’t you take the week off, yeah?”

“Oh, okay.” he replied, his thoughts going back to Y/n.

“And make sure you come back to Earth by then!” the male yelled and stormed off, annoyed about having to make a new shooting schedule for the week. Tom reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone:

Tom: Would you like to go on a date with me tomorrow?

Tom: Totally fine if you don’t

Tom: Don’t want to pressure you

To say that the male felt stupid was an understatment. Why was he so nervous? He barely knew this girl for a week and she made him feel like a teenager who was helplessly chasing their crush around. He looked at the screen, three little dots appeared and a message suddenly popped up:

Y/n: I would like that

Tom: Great! I’ll pick you up at 6! Text me your postal address.

Tom sat on the sofa in Y/n’s flat as they watched Citizen Kane on her small telly. The female was laid down, her legs laying on top of his as she balanced a big bowl of popcorn on her belly, occasionally munching on the snack. Tom looked away from the noir film, his attention purely on his girlfriend. The pair have been dating for nearly half a year and Y/n was still unaware that her boyfriend was an A list celebrity. Of course, Tom wanted to tell her, but they’ve already gotten so far into their relationship that he was scared of how she might react to the news.

“You know… I’ve never been to your flat,” the female said and stuffed some popcorn into her mouth, never taking her eyes off the telly.

“Is that something you would like to do?” Tom questioned.

“I mean… We always spend time here. Why haven’t you invited me over? Are you hiding a secret family from me?” her eyes met his and he saw the playful gleam behind her orbs.

“You caught me. My wife and kids wouldn’t be too happy to find out that I enjoy spending my time more with my mistress than them,” Y/n picked up a piece of popcorn and threw it at him, landing it right in the middle of his forehead.

“That’s what you get, Mr. Holland… or is that even your real name?” she said glaring at him, but a smile was plastered on her lips. Tom grabbed the bowl of popcorn from her belly and placed it down on the floor. He quickly got on top of her, using his forearms as support to hover over her.

“Would you like to come over tomorrow then? I could cook us dinner?” he questioned as he looked all over her face, admiring every little detail.

“That sounds lovely. Your wife and kids won’t mind?” she giggled.

“No. I’ll make sure they’re out by the time you get there,” he said and dipped down to capture her lips.

Tom was nervous about his girlfriend coming over, and not because he had a secret family. Tom did not mind that his girlfriend lived in a flat that only had one small bedroom and a common area, nor was he worried about her being materialistic and only keeping him around for the money. She didn’t have much, but she liked to spoil him with small gifts here and there with whatever money she had left from her paycheck. It was bad enough that he drove around in a Porsche, but he lived in a luxurious two story flat on the outskirts of London. If she were to ask questions, how was he supposed to explain where his wealth came from? What if there were paparazzis situated outside his home? He wanted to tell her about being Spider-man on his own time and this could potentially out him.

“I thought you lived closer to the city…” Y/n said looking out the window, watching as they got further from the center of London.

“I prefer staying out of London… It’s always so crowded and the traffic is horrible.” he replied as he pulled into the carpark. Y/n smiled in anticipation. The building of the flats looked really modern, as if they were built recently. She knew that this place must have been expensive to live in. The couple walked inside the building, his hand on the small of her back as he led her towards the lift.

“Mr. Holland.” the doorman greeted, with a kind smile.

“John. Good evening.”

Once inside the lift, Tom swiped his key card and pressed the button for the highest floor. Y/n looked around, slightly feeling out of place. She knew that Tom worked in the film industry, but she didn’t expect him to be loaded. The door to the lift opened and the girl's eyes went wide with shock as she was met with a spacious flat and huge windows that were facing towards the center of London.

“Woah… You said you did what?” the female questioned as she looked out the window.

“I work on movie sets… which reminds me,” he said and came up behind the female, wrapping his arms around her middle, “There is a private screening tonight of the movie I was working on when we first met. It would mean a lot to me, if you came along to watch it.” he said, kissing his girlfriend's cheek.

“Am I allowed to?”

“Of course. You’re my plus one, love…”

The couple finished their dinner before going to see the private screening. Most movies would be shown to the cast and crew before they officially premiered in Hollywood. This showing was meant for the UK team only. This was the moment that Tom would confess who he actually was. His heart was pounding against his chest as he and Y/n sat down in the chairs in the screen room. There were only five others there.

“What’s this movie about?” questioned the female.

“Superheroes.” Tom responded with a bit of a smirk on his face. This was going to be the first time he’s seen the final product, so he wasn’t completely sure when Peter Parker was going to make an appearance. The Marvel logo played and transitioned into a poor quality memorial video of all the Avengers that died during the Thanos battle. The scene continued with two teens as they were giving a morning announcement to their school. Tom looked over at his girlfriend who looked confused, she must not have watched any of the marvel movies. The scene ended and there he was… It was always weird seeing your own face on a big screen.

“I have a plan!” his character started, talking about how he was going to woo MJ in Paris. Tom looked over to his right. Y/n had her mouth wide open as she watched her boyfriend speak in an American accent. She looked at the screen and slowly turned her head to look at her boyfriend as if trying to confirm that it was the same person. Five minutes into the movie and there he was in his Spider-man suit talking at a fundraiser. Y/n grabbed her bag and abruptly stood up, walking out of the screening room, having seen enough.

“Shit…” Tom mumbled and raced after her, “Love, wait!” he yelled, but the female kept walking until she got outside. Not knowing where to go, she stopped in her tracks, “Y/n…”

“You’re Spiderman…” she muttered lowly and Tom almost didn’t catch it.

“I-” he started saying, but she quickly cut him off.

“This is mental. You’re Spiderman and you forgot to mention that your job entails you to actually be the main character in the film?” she said and turned around to look at him. She looked sad, almost disappointed. Tom was at a loss for words.

“You’ve nothing to say?” she tutted and started walking in a random direction, away from the male.

“Babe! Wait!” he yelled and ran up to stand in front of her to block her way, “I was scared okay… Everyone who I ever meet on the street wants a photo or autograph. When I met you, you made me feel normal for once, not like I’m some object that belongs in a museum. I know that keeping this from you was bad and I am truly sorry,” her eyes sparkled in understanding as she listened to the male speak, “I don’t want to lose you.” he ended, his eyes slightly glossy. Y/n sighed and leaned over to give him a kiss. He grabbed her waist and pulled her closer to him, fearing that this would be the last time he would be able to feel her lips.

“I understand if you want to break up-”

“Shut up and kiss me, you bloody git.” the female giggled, making Tom smile and lean in for another kiss.

…

“Don’t lie to me ever again.”

“Never.”

It’s been about five years since the couple started dating. Tom was ready to ask Y/n to marry him. He was going to propose on their anniversary, but he wasn’t sure how or where; all he knew was that he was ready to call her his forever. The male walked into their shared bedroom where the future Mrs. Holland was already in, laying under the covers, dozing off. He slipped in and pulled her close to his chest.

“I love you, Y/n.” he whispered as he kissed her neck, earning a tired reply…

“I love you, too…”

~~~~~

   "He's waking up!"

   "Tom!"

   "Can you hear us?"

   "TOM!" slowly his eyes opened and he met a white ceiling.

   "Where am I?" he groaned and looked over to the side, his mom was there looking at the male in worry.

   "You're in the hospital, Tom. You've been in a coma for six months..." his mother said in a calm voice as tears spilled from her eyes.    

   "Mum? Where's Y/n? I need to see her, is she okay?" Tom questioned as he tried to get out of bed. His head was pounding as he tried to recall the accident.

“Woah… you need to stay in bed, Thomas. Who’s Y/n?” his mother asked, concerned.

“My girlfriend… I was going to propose to her.” Tom let out.

“I’m going to go get a doctor. Please don’t move.” his mother said and left the room.

“What happened?” Tom groaned and he held his head.

“Your director called us after you didn’t show up for the shooting…” spoke up his brother, Harry, who was sitting on a chair, on the opposite side where his mother just stood, “You and some girl got hit by a car just outside a shop in London.”

“Coffee shop?” Tom questioned, his headache starting to ease.

“Yeah…” Harry said.

“Where’s the girl?” Tom questioned, curious what was happening.

“Just in the other room. They haven't been able to identify her.” Harry finished, concerned about his brother.

“Can you take me to her?”

“You just woke up… No way…” Harry said as he frowned at the older male.

“I need to see her…” Tom pleaded, making his brother sigh. Harry got up from the chair and rolled over a wheelchair that was located on the other side of the room. He helped his brother on it and wheeled him towards the room next door. The pair of brothers stopped just outside a window that looked into a patient's room. The shape of her face, the colour of her hair- everything about her was so familiar. She had lost a little colour on her skin, probably due to being in a coma and light bruises littered her body. He couldn’t see the colour of the girl’s eyes, but he was sure that he recognized her.

   She was the same girl who Tom was going to propose to. That girl was Y/n...

Thanks for reading, lovely~ 

[solange-lol]

hiii in celebration of AUctober, what are some of your fav solangelo AUs?

Anonymous said to solange-lol:

Hi! Kinda a random question: do you have any favorite riordanverse fanfics that you’d suggest reading? I’m looking for ones to read, but I’ve been having trouble finding new ones! Thanks!

rec list #1 | rec list #2

all recs can be found under the tag ‘lizs solangelo fic recs’ on my blog!

technically its past auctober now, but better late then never to drop my third solangelo rec list!! especially considering the state of the world rn ... lets just say its a celebration of me actually participating in sw for the first time in a while

rec under cut as always!! its not all aus but its the count that thots

Find Another Place to Stay by @unwieldyink

personally i think breakup fics are incredibly underrated, and i also think annie is incredibly underrated, so enjoy ur little cry if you read this one (tw // violence in this one)

Hershey’s kiss by @unwieldyink

we love a godswap!! it’s actually been a while since ive read this one and i reread this while making this rec list and can i just say that zeus!nico and hermes!will are both such valid concepts and this just has a rly good dynamic to it

Actors by @buoyantsaturn

i could talk about this fic for hours but lets just say ao3 has told me ive visted this fic 40 times. im not kidding. fake dating is just a godtier trope

start of something new by jinniefic

if you know me, you know that i fricken LOVE high school musical, and this is literally just the start of the first movie but solangelo and honestly a little more iconic please read even if ur not a hsm fan

paper/plastic by @rosyredlipstick

the fact that this is from 2018 and took this long to get into my rec list is tragic because i think about this fic a lot... a lot. mortal au. very chill, strangers to lovers, very good vibes, will be rereading soon (everything rosy writes is amazing we already knew this)

10:37pm by @buoyantsaturn

surprise another cj fic! fun fact she debated with us for a good half hour about what to title this fic so go read it so you can tell her you like the name (and the fic itself... its a very good fic) (tw // alchohol and drug use for this one)

Sunflower by ChiseHatori

3 days in the infirmary is probably the easiest trope u can find in the solangelo tag but i have to say this one really made me soft just bc it feels a lot more in character than some of the others ive read, and it basically picks up right where they ended in the books

Will You, or Will You Not? by @thebluesideofmyworld

marriage fics... also very soft. just boys bein boys. dual engagements. mortal au. all that good stuff vv soft i loved it

let your heart win by @justanothervampiregirl

this one is short but its also probably one of the most in character fics ive ever read and i really like this style of writing mixed with canon compliance so :)

The Magic of Naomi Solace by Sweetymomo

naomi solace, underratted legend. i aspire to have her relationship with will. lots of familial background if you like that!! and its set at a bnb!!

forget all the shooting stars and silver moons by itotallyreadthatbook

when i saw this in the tag i was SO excited bc we love high school aus here and it was!! very good indeed!! this trope is one ive never seen before and i recommend 10/10 good banter

They won’t always live by Phantomxlegend

will overworking himself and coping with loss always makes me :(( so if ur okay with some will angst then buckle up

“I am fully capable of kicking your ass” by @unwieldyink

i remember i saw the email notification for this one and immediately was like yup absolutely im in and it 100% lives up to its title we love capture the flag solangelo

the night we met by peachyytomlinson

a lil ooc but also very angsty and did make me emotional when i read this late at night. i think i wrote something similar a while back but i just aaaaa will angst man

“look how hard i can cry FWSHHH”  by @buoyantsaturn

call me biased bc i like to claim that i originated the idea of demeter!will and cj dedicated this fic to me but like BRO its so soft and i love it here nico leave the plants along challenge failed

femboy hooters, or the time percy jackson failed to keep a secret by luciethebean

its all fun and games until the fic turns out to genuinely be really good. like, yes the title is exactly what you think it is but it doesnt matter bc its so fricken well written im^@*#&(*)($_$#&^@$(@*)* yeah

Of Ties and Significant Annoyances by seokjinvilla (@thechampagnecocainegasoline)

we dont support jkr in this household but what we do support is this bc this plot is genius and i love it

everything’s going swimmingly by tsunamiroll (@catboy-ethan)

fun fact i posed the idea of a sports/team prompt to the sw mod crew literally just so someone would pull through and write a swim au and ethan DID without even knowing. i love them and their writing style is so !!!! please read it

when you smile (the whole world stops) by tsunamiroll (@catboy-ethan)

another ethan fic!! this is the perfect fic for a rough day where u just want some cuddles bc thats literally the plot of the fic. i love this one with my entire heart its very fluffy 10/10 do reccomend

pumpkin spice (i hate it, it's not nice) (ok maybe it's a little nice) by tsunamiroll (@catboy-ethan)

ethan fic part 3!! bc i binge read these all in one night!! literally again their writing style is so amazing and the witty banter!!!! also we love a retail bookstore au 

Burnt Plastic (and Other Bad Ideas) by More_of_This

so this one isnt exactly romantically solangelo but it is hilarious in my opinion and i absolutely adore well written college aus and while i know nothing about college this fic is so funny to me (if you read the tags there is, in fact, a raccoon involved) (tw // drinking for this one)

all because you kissed me goodnight by @buoyantsaturn

i have been WAITING for a mortal counselors au and im sure theres some out there already but y’all already know im a cj stan! lots of slowburn, friends to lovers, coworkers, all the good stuff (and i named this one and offered cj a lot of materials from my own camp so this one especially hits!! i reccomend for those good ol summer vibes!!) (tw // drinking for this one)

Waiting With You by @buoyantsaturn

oh boy buckle up if u want an angst ride because this fic tore me apart. i keep threatning cj with “dont pull another waiting with you”. that being said, very much feels like a movie while youre reading it, very fluffy in the middle, we love mutual pining. 

Little Italian Boy by @buoyantsaturn

stream little italian boy by grace gilmore. youll get it. thats it.

The Clues by @thebluesideofmyworld

secret dating when done well is legit one of my favorite tropes of all time and this!!! this!!!!!!!!! its outsiders perspective also which is another one of my favorite tropes, and just little views on nicos life and i love it

So Come On, Talk it Out (your voice brought me back from the dead) by @buoyantsaturn

will solace, sponsered by kitkats, cj edition

no but if you read tower of nero you’ll really like this missing pieces pre-ton fic this is a really soft little fic with a bunch of easter eggs from the book in it, so i highly recommend! if you havent read ton yet and are still avoiding spoilers, come back to this one!

reaching for the sun (you, you, you) by moonswords (@tortadelimao)

i just read this one about 2 hours ago for the first time and i am Still thinking about it. its like the getting together that i literally feel like is canon and the vibes are Immaculate (also william “what about me looks straight” solace)

“Are we on a date right now?” by @unwieldyink

overworked will, nico helping out in the infirmary, first dates & hikes, canon compliant, we love to see it (also its an annie fic so ur required by law to read it)

Outrunning karma by Phantomxlgend 

more will angst! featuring angry overworked will!

Everlasting Ring by minyoongurt (@blueblackslowtown)

i was Very excited when i read the summary of this one, and i think minyoongurt did a really good job!! healer will, injured nico, the whole dynamic. also i love the idea of nico only knowing “thank you” “go away” and “fuck you” in sign language. im pretty sure thats canon

The Little Thing by Rainbow_Mess

i belive this is also a pre-toa fic thats just exploring all the stuff we found out about will in ton and its very short and sweet :)

and of course, a few of my recent works for your consideration

who is he (and what is he to you?)

just doing my silly little tasks

i don’t need three bars to tell me we’re meant to connect

truly, madly, deeply

[vampirethatcarlislegotbittenby]

Lost and Found

Evans was the first one to introduce me to the equal wonders and horrors of what the internet contained. From weird social media posts and blog posts to stupidly long and weirdly detailed stories attached to recipes, as a team, we found so many stupid things to laugh at together. Being a poorer kid, I hadn’t had much connection with the internet before the early two thousands – but it didn’t matter that sometimes, I fucked up and searched the wrong things, causing many… less savoury sites to pop up sometimes, all full of ads and spammy links. Not that Chris cared, of course. He hadn’t cared about any of the times that I’d messed up, or knocked things over, causing priceless objects like his families entire china set to knock over when were kids, or sent in the wrong essay for one of his college applications. He hadn’t cared, and somehow had ignored or missed all my faults. So many memories, heartbreaks and stress, all throughout our childhood, high school, college and now, our careers and professional lives. So many times and so many memories… but now, we seemed to be drifting. I mean, I understood – I was some broke anthropologist, new to her field and he was a successful actor, starting to get bigger and better roles. Chris was always in my line of vision, my thoughts – how could he not be? He was my best friend, my most trusted confidante. Our whole relationship followed the exact cliché of the stereotypical drifting ‘high-school besties’ trying to keep in contact and remain close after the environment and whole drama of school, relationships and early adulthood. Chris noticed a lot of things throughout our friendship about me. The way I flicked my hair, or only really grinned at twisted jokes. Stupid, I know, to hold onto all the minor things that didn’t matter in the grand scheme of life, and work but how could I not, when my heart so belonged to him. The only thing Chris didn’t notice throughout our early friendship was the fact that I loved him. I mean, I never had anybody but him, but he had so many other girlfriends and other surrounding friends. I was too awkward to really fit in with others, before I lost him, so I kept track of us, our friendship. Yeah, I knew others I was semi-friends with, but it wasn’t as if I was invited to anything of theirs outside of school.He never noticed that fact. Saying goodbye to our closeness, our friendship… it was, for the lack of a better word, heartbreaking.

Unsurprisingly, our totally different career paths caused Chris and I to drift. Not in a bad way, we just… stopped talking as much. I studied old bones and the structure of ancient societies, and he acted our false personas and scripts for a living. Anniversaries forgotten, birthdays left behind… the distance between us just grew and grew for so many weeks and months that eventually, I forgot his voice and the small quirks he had, and the silly rituals we would perform, like the tic at the side of his mouth that he had whenever he got excited or happy about an event or job or something like that, or the way we would  dance and yell and celebrate together whenever it rained, no matter how long it was for. I forgot about those moments, those small things about us, and him, and I because of our stupid schedules and inability to communicate. And God, I regretted it so much. We’d promised each other, at our universities graduation that we’d keep in contact. We’ll keep in contact, we’d promised. Well, that hadn’t ended up happening, had it? I mean, looking back on the situation, it’s obvious – we could hardly catch up in person after graduation due to our respective hectic schedules and jobs. It’s a bit hard to keep in contact and stay friends when one person can’t talk in person and the other couldn’t talk over the phone, or online. We were so disconnected and fragmented that when it came to our ‘conversations’, one topic could drag on for days. I guess we just kind of gave up trying. We were both so surrounded by people, me on field and him always on a different and new set, but at the same time so alone. It hurt at the time, losing one of my closest friends, but distance and time, combined with our lack of communication, allowed us to lead such different lives and become such different people – for the most part, better I think, despite the feelings of missing another piece of ourselves over the years.

The years without Chris saw me become such a different person, it was almost hard for him to recognise me when I met him again. Four years had flown by, in a whirlwind of partners, drama, extra studying and new friendships and work opportunities for the both of us. We both had so much more of a safety net, and knew so much more about the ‘scary big, wide world’ as we’d both once perceived it. Not everything was so dependant on just each other anymore – even though I’ll admit that I’d once loved him, losing him wasn’t that big of a deal anymore. We were both so different – me, once a broke, socially-awkward butterfly, had finally emerged from her cocoon and had found other people just like her. Chris was successful, well known and while his personality was so different… physically, well let’s just say that he could still get it. I was so happy – in a stable job (finally!), with an apartment, friends and no pressing need for a man. My life was going well, in summary. Yes, sometimes work was stressful, or there was drama at home or in the friendship group or romantically, or there was a disappointing date or party, but that didn’t matter. It was overshadowed by the good. I was no longer the broken-hearted 22-year-old who was losing her best friend and romantic interest and was on the brink of financial ruin. I’d metaphorically dug myself out of that ditch. Life was mostly good, except for one small element – I didn’t feel like I had anybody to truly connect with. Not like I’d had with Chris.

Unexpectedly, it was at a party we reconnected at. I mean, yes, I was no longer uncomfortable in loud or crowded spaces, but at the same time, I didn’t quite feel totally comfortable at house parties or bars yet either. I still felt that I needed to get used to them a bit. I’d been dragged along to the housewarming party by a bunch of girls from my work that I was semi-friends with. Long story short, I was drinking punch, chatting to some other people from my work when Chris whirled around from a separate group and quite literally knocked into me. Luckily, nothing was left in my cup, otherwise I feel as if I would have punched him in the arm, regardless of who he was to me. I’d blinked, and stared at him, not comprehending who he was. Why the hell was he here? This was a party full of a group of nerdy anthropologists, archaeologists and other humanities-centred people who’s worked sometimes overlapped. What the hell was a distant famous actor doing there? Turns out he was just a plus-one of a friend who had been at the same university hadn’t wanted to rock up alone that night. Weird, the way that some circles overlap. On the outside… well, not much had changed. We still recognised each other, for the most part. Only minor things like haircuts and clothing styles were slightly different or changed. But on the inside? Personally? Our whole dynamic was different – we were both actual, working adults then – him, a distant star, me a lowly intern. Seeing him at that party… well, my heart cracked wide open. Memories, of our childhood, our teenagerhood, of the memories of camping, firelight, stars and smoke, of all of our secrets and myths and times spent together of the first twenty years of our retrospectives lives spent and spoken and whispered together, flooded my mind. The sounds of my friends talking faded into white static and the air tasted like distinct batter-acid taste of mountain dew for a few seconds before I snapped back into reality, and faced one of my oldest friends.

I may not have been sure beforehand, but when Chris smiled at me, and we started talking again, I knew while both of us were completely different in personalities, and interests and what we worked on, we still were very much the same in the way that we talked and acted. The coffee place that I had gone to loads of times in the past couple of years with friends was physically no different, of course, but to me it came to mean a whole lot more personally, just because of Chris. Numbers and tears exchanged, we agreed to meet up, as much as we could or at least once a week at that one location. Sounds stupid, I know, to always meet at one place when there are so many other places and locations to try but that local café was neutral territory, where we could catch up and get to know each other, a place to reminisce and remember as well as catch up. Plus, it had great milkshakes. And I fell in love all over again – with him, and his laughter and quirks and personality. Time had changed us both and our situations but had also brought us together again by one simple twist of fate or simple fluke. A few months after, I found out that well, he felt that way too. My emotions ran wild. Joy, sudden shock, laughing, crying. Overall, pure happiness over that. Finally, he’d really noticed me, and loved me in return. Our relationship became something different, but so much happier. Sunday mornings spent in the sun, weekends at the beach or random date nights mid-week whenever he’d drop back in town without telling me, taking a break from filming. Thought sets were so far away, and he was often so physically far away, we continued, marching on, not entirely forgetting what happened when you lost somebody you loved and reminding ourselves daily, to never lose contact. Being with Chris was like always being home – the constant feeling of safety, happiness and warmth. 

Chris’ smile at that party reminded me, and our renewed relationship reminded me – it doesn’t matter where you are, or who you are, the opportunity to find somebody is not restricted to a small group, or an elite. It might be a random stroke of luck, or through dedicated searching, you can find what you have lost. There’s always the opportunity to reconnect and find those you have lost. Yes, you’ll fight, yes, you’ll lose sometimes or grow a bit more distant or lose a person, friend or loved one but that doesn’t matter, as long as you care – because there’ll always be a way back home, no matter the distance. After all, it only takes one question from the other party - Why don’t you come up and see?

@whiskey-cokenfanfic (sorry this is so late. I didn’t have connection I apologise so much anyway here’s my submission my alt is @theboningseason by the way this is just my personal thanks sorry sorry)

[drink-n-watch]

  Genre : Action, comedy, supernatural, urban fantasy, science fiction.

Episodes: 12

Studio: Bones

  Ahhh New York. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere! Except you can’t make it there anymore because 3 years ago a cataclysm opened a huge pandimensional rift in the city and its been sealed off since then. Now the people trapped inside have to coexist with a wide variety of aliens and other creatures, some of which can get pretty dangerous. And that’s if some random explosion or building collapse doesn’t take you down. But these are new yorkers. They’re used to stuff like that. Besides, they have the *brave* super men and women over at Libra to keep them safe. And starting today Leo Watch is one of them. But what can a normal boy with extraordinary eyes really contribute in this very bloody battle. Turns out, the one thing we all need the most.

  Blood Blockade Battlefront is a silly title, isn’t it? Well, I think it is. I almost skipped over this show because of it. Then again I decided to watch it as part of my yearly Halloween round up because of it too so I guess it worked out in the end. I should say, Triple B is not, in fact, a horror anime, I would call it action comedy but it does feature a lot of Halloween-like elements and the first season even ends on Halloween complete with celebrations and jack-o’-lanterns, so I think it’s earned its place in my Halloween lead up.

we’re off to a great start

Since I knew nothing of this show besides the name (and we’ve established I was unfairly judgy about that) I had pretty much no expectations going in. Aside from perhaps a certain shortage of quality. I was a bit of a jerk to this show. As such, when it became obviously apparent from the first episode that there was both money and talent behind this production, I was downright thrilled.

Blood Blockade Battlefront looks good! Real good. The characters designs are decent and very well executed but it’s in the environments that everything becomes impressive. The cityscapes are gorgeous and intricately detailed. Every scene is bursting with extras going about their day. The city is undeniably alive!

This goes a long way to making events just a touch more…ok so realistic is not the right word here. You just sort of feel the impact of what’s happening because you’ve been seeing all those people on screen, living their lives and going about their day. I guess, it makes the world complete in a way I’ve rarely seen.

scale! it creates a great scene of scale!

And let’s talk about the animation. Because Blood Blockade Battlefront is one action-packed series. It’s almost in constant movement which could have been very annoying or at least confusing if the animation wasn’t so crisp and well-executed. You know what, while I’m just fangirling over the production here, let me throw in the voice acting. Actually great across the board. For my taste, not a single weak actor in the bunch.

I’m straining to say something negative about the technical merits. I guess the closest I can come up with is that it’s not that novel in either design or direction but you know what, that’s kind of a good thing. This is a weird story with way too much happening half the time. Overly creative production values would have overburdened it. It’s great as it is. Good job Bones. I’m being captain obvious here. Bones knows how to make an anime. I could have skipped all these paragraphs and just said: It was made by Bones…

oh good

Fine, let’s tackle the story. Or rather, let’s not. I’m just going to tell you what’s narratively wrong with Blood Blockade Battlefront. There’s too much action. As in, there’s not enough exposition. I actually had to look up the core background of the story just to properly understand the basis of the events happening. That’s not a good sign. I’ve watched the entire season and I’m still a little fuzzy on the details and rules of the universe.

Half the time I was just ambling along with the story, trying to catch up or giving up and going along for the ride. Never quite certain who exactly the bad guys were and why they were doing whatever they were doing. What the consequences of events would be. This is the type of thing that tends to really bother me in an anime. I really can’t get invested in a story unless I understand the basic foundations at least.

Usually…

I’m just getting to that

I had a ton of fun with Blood Blockade Battlefront season 1. I fully intend on watching season 2 soon. To be fair, I had managed to pick up enough by episode 7 or so to get emotionally involved in the finale and those last few episodes had a wonderful visceral impact on me. Still, I can’t deny that the narrative is just messy. With dropped threads here and there, forgotten explanations and setups that seemingly led nowhere. Yet I didn’t mind and after some thought, I realized why.

I loved these characters. And I mean all of them! Only a few got thoroughly established this season but even those we barely got to know (which was most of Libra, to be honest) still gave the impression of complete characters that simply didn’t have that big a role in this particular story, rather than underdeveloped ones.

Even the antagonists were compelling, layered and complex, even though this type of story could have easily gotten away with a simple bad guy who’s bad.

good point!

It should be noted that I have a soft spot for action comedies. For a while, Blood Blockade Battlefront really reminded me of Men in Black which is a good thing. But it goes beyond that. The slowly revealed characters of Black and White were so beautifully relatable and endearing that my pure interest in their fates alone would have kept me watching. The final episode is double the time (meaning somewhere around 45 minutes) and I didn’t notice. For reals. The only way I found out was the fact that I ended up with an abnormally huge amount of screencaps, otherwise, I would have never known. That’s how into it I had gotten. And even though it did get a bit cheesy by moments, I couldn’t care less. As far as I was concerned, the series had earned it by then.

This may not be a traditional horror anime to watch for Halloween but there is more than enough blood and beasties to fit the theme and it’s just a fun ride! I think the show is unfortunately underrated (although I’m not entirely sure what I’m basing this on). Unless the quality nosedives in the second season, I hope they keep making these.

hot right?

  Favorite character: K.K. cause hot and White cause… I just love White so much. She may be the best damsel in distress I’ve ever come across.The trope at it’s very best.

What this anime taught me: I wish I had siblings (again!)

I don’t pretend to be anything I’m not….except sober. I’ve had to pretend that a few times.

Suggested drink: Bloody Mary (it really couldn’t be anything else)

Every time we see a newscast – take a sip

Every time Leo uses his eyes – take a sip

Every time eo and Zapp bicker – take a sip

Every time there’s collateral damage – take a breath

Every time anyone ends up in the hospital – raise your glass

Every time anyone takes a picture – take a sip

Every time Chain is perched on a high spot – take a sip

Every time text appears across the screen (not subtitles!) – take a sip

Every time Zapp gets peat up – stretch

if it’s by an ally – cheer

Every time anyone says “huma” – take a sip

Every time we see the King of Despair – gulp!

It’s a quite pretty show. Looking over my screencaps, I’m struck by it again. Of course Pinterest, Imgur, yada yada…

  Blood Blockade Battlefront s1 – Beyond Black and White (Countdown to Halloween) Genre : Action, comedy, supernatural, urban fantasy, science fiction. Episodes: 12 Studio: Bones Ahhh New York. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere!

[little-chimchim]

Sugar and Spice- Part 1

Rating: PG-13

Word Count: 3919

Genre: Chef au! Celebrity au! 

Pairing: Mingyu x Wonwoo

A/N: Oh shiz, it’s been what, like five months since I’ve written a fic? Woah. I am so sorry for keeping you all waiting. So here it is! I know it’s an actually pairing instead of an OC this time, but I think you guys will enjoy this, I know I do. Thank you all for being patient, I love you all...Kay

Masterlist 

--------------------------------

“What does cooking mean to you?” The talk show host asked, seemingly proud of herself by asking such an ‘original’ question. She straightened her back and leaned towards the man she had been interrogating for the past twenty minutes.

The man, void of any awkward tension, followed the host’s actions and moved toward the mic that had been thrust in his direction as he smiled cockily towards the camera. “Cooking, to me, is an art. I’m not just putting foods together at random for people to eat. No, I blend together ingredients to create masterpieces that people don’t just witness with their eyes, but to savor with their scent and taste as well. Cooking to me, is an art that can truly bring everyone together.” The man finished his answer by quickly winking towards the camera before turning back to the host.

There was a thunderous applause sounding from the audience, mostly consisting of teenage girls and their overbearing house mothers, all taking turns chanting the celebrity chef’s name.

On the other side of the camera, in front of a worn little t.v, tucked in between a refrigerator and shelf, sat six men, all staring at the man in the interview.  

“There are only so many ways to look like a pompous idiot, and Chef is exhibiting every single one of them,” Griped the man in the middle. He shook his head, the long black strands of his hair falling into his eyes as he did so. The black haired man looked to the other men in the room, an evident frown on his face.

“Is someone jealous that they didn’t get to be on t.v. too?” Cracked the tallest of the men. Minghao, the man with the black hair, peeked over his shoulder in order to glare daggers at the man who opened his mouth.

Seokmin, the tallest of the men, only smiled towards Minghao, his eyes disappearing into half moons as the smile took over his lively features. “Sorry, Hao. You know that I’m just playing with you.” He cheered, trying his best to sound sincere towards the younger male.

Minghao rolled his eyes, knitting his fingers together in his lap. “At least it’s good business for the restaurant,” Hao grumbled. The dark haired man untied his fingers and pushed himself off of the creaky metal chair. He swept his gaze around the kitchen the focused his attention back to the men in the room.

“Chef should be getting back soon, let’s get things ready to open.”

Minghao, despite his young age, was the sous chef. Second in command. When Mingyu was not present, Minghao had no qualms with running the kitchen how he wanted it. Of course, because euro of this, it caused an almost friendly tension between the two chefs that was evident to everyone who laid eyes on the pair.

“Soonyoung, Seokmin, and Seungkwan go get the friers ready and start prepping the fish, we have salmon from last night to use.” Minghao barked at the three men huddled closest together.

The three of them nodded their heads and scurried off, just to finish the task Minghao had given them.

These three were the line cooks, a humorous bunch trained in the culinary arts. They were young, fresh out of top notch culinary schools, but naive and inexperienced. Though, to Mingyu, this only added to their appeal.

After giving the trio their orders, Minghao turned to the next man in line, the oldest in the kitchen. His features were much softer than Minghao’s, kinder too. A lighthearted smile played at his pink lips as Minghao approached him.

“Joshua, did you finish the icing for the strawberry tart?” Minghao asked, his voice half expectant, already knowing what the older man’s response would be. Joshua’s eyes lit up, he straightened his back and brought his hands to the tops of his hips.

“The icing is done and so are the chocolate cakes. I started on the creme brulee but I decided that we were going to do the cakes as our dessert special instead.” Joshua beamed as he spoke about his work.

Minghao nodded his head, reaching over to pat his elder’s shoulder. “Good work. I didn’t expect anything else.” The black haired man pressed his lips together into a thin smile, waving his hand at the older man signaling for him to go to his station.

Joshua bowed his head slightly before making his way back to the counters filled with goodies.

Minghao then turned his attention towards the last man. He was sitting patiently on a rickety wooden stool, his hands folded in his lap while he waited for Minghao’s orders. “Wonwoo, go scrub dishes we'll be using a lot of them tonight.” Minghao ordered as he turned around to man his own station.

Wonwoo stayed silent, not uttering a word as he nodded his head. He pushed himself off of the stool and sauntered towards the sinks, where plates and pans were already starting to stack up. He sucked in a deep breath, rolling his shirt up to his elbows before diving into the workload.

Wonwoo was different from the rest of the men in the restaurant. He did not attend some overly expensive culinary school in some remote European country, nor did he have the honor to actually prepare the food himself. Instead, he was charged with dishwashing and good prep; as was the life of the kitchen assistant.

No one truly knew anything about the young assistant, other than his name and that never said no to anyone in the kitchen. He was a peculiar man, no doubt about it, but after a year of working for Mingyu, everyone stopped questioning him and left him to his own devices.

Of course, the troublesome trio of Seokmin, Soonyoung, and Seungkwan couldn’t just leave it at that. They spent their days trying to figure the quiet assistant out, oftentimes terrorizing the poor man until he actually says something about their antics.

The mediator of everything was the ever innocent Joshua, who had, on multiple occasions, tried to befriend the quiet assistant. Though, with no avail.

No matter what, Jeon Wonwoo had always been the kitchen’s biggest mystery.

Later that night, shortly after the brunt of the kitchen rush had died away, the man of the hour walked through the doors of the restaurant. Mingyu strode into his kitchen, smiling at all of the customers along the way.

He was clad in fine clothing, and if everyone didn’t know better, he could easily be mistaken for something other than a world class chef.

Except, he was.

Kim Mingyu, former child actor turned celebrity chef and tv personality. Not exactly the turn of events most people expected when it came to child stars. Though, when Mingyu found that his passion didn’t lie with acting, he turned around and turned his true passion into a career.

He walked through the building with an aura that screamed confidence. He held his head up high with a smile on his lips so bright that the sun would have been jealous. Once he came through the kitchen, all time seemed to stop.

Everyone paused what they were doing to look at Mingyu. Minghao, having been working on the main entrees, was the first to speak to the chef. “Hello Chef,” He exclaimed loudly as he bent his body forward.

Soon after, everyone else in the kitchen followed Minghao’s brief introduction to their boss. Mingyu, satisfied with the greeting, pressed his lips together into a thin smile and waved his hand at Minghao for him to continue. “It looks like you guys have done a good job while I was gone. I’m impressed.” Mingyu stepped through the kitchen, walking passed the rest of the employees. He brought his hand up to his mouth and yawned, visibly tired from the day’s public adventure.

“I’m heading upstairs, I’m exhausted.”  Was all Mingyu said before he started to make his way towards the stairs that led to his apartment above the restaurant.

When he reached the top of the stairs, Mingyu looked back down to his employees and caught their attention. “Close up early tonight, you all deserve it. See you tomorrow.” He added as he stepped away.

The kitchen staff looked amongst themselves and nodded their heads, pleased with their boss’s generosity. Minghao returned back to his dish, a warm smile on his face. “Alright everyone, you heard the man. Let’s get out of here.” He cheered while he finished up the last of his plates.

Wonwoo was the last one inside the kitchen. The dishes kept piling up, even after the rest of the kitchen had left. He wished to go home, but he wasn’t allowed to until the entirety of the kitchen was spotless.

This was his favorite time of the night, when everyone was gone and he had the entire kitchen to himself. It was calming, not having to deal with everyone else and being able to do his own thing, at his own pace.

This was also the time of night where he could prepare his own food, without being yelled at for touching the stove.

Contrary to what everyone else believed, Wonwoo loved to cook. When Mingyu hired him just a year prior, he believed that he was being hired in as a line cook. He was greatly disappointed to find out what his actual role entailed, but a job was a job and Wonwoo had bills to pay.

So he sucked it up and kept to himself, in hopes that he would be moved up one day.

Wonwoo wiped his wet hands on the rough fabric of his dark blue jeans. He stretched his arms over his head and grunted the moment his joints popped. He rubbed his tired eyes then stepped away from the sinks.

He roamed the empty kitchen curiously as he examined the cabinets and coolers for ingredients for tonight's meal. He combed throw his various choices before finally settling on the ingredients for a basic pasta dish that was easy enough for a toddler to replicate.

He had prepared far trickier dishes, but tonight, all he wanted to do was go home with a full meal and enough time to sleep before having to come right back in to the kitchen.

Wonwoo, ever the perfectionist, laid his ingredients out in neat lines, organizing them in the order that he would use them. He grinned to himself, an action he so rarely expressed, and began his work.

He flew through the steps, completing it all with ease. He found joy in even the simple dishes. Cutting a tomato wasn't just another boring step. Every detail mattered to him.

In fact, he became so enthralled by the cooking process that he wasn't fully aware with how loud he was being, as he was so lost in his own world.

Usually, using the kitchen after the restaurant was closed was no problem. He was able to go in, get the ingredients and start cooking with no setbacks. It had been a year without being found out.

Though, Wonwoo had gotten a little too comfortable in the empty space of the kitchen. He was so used to being unbothered in these rare few minutes alone, that he hadn't heard someone tiptoeing down the stairs and into the little space.

“Mince the onions instead of chopping them. It's easier to eat it that way.” Spoke a soft voice from the other side of the room.

Wonwoo jumped, dropping the onion he had been holding on to the ground. His heart rate picked up as he turned his head to face the owner of the voice.

He stood up straighter and placed his hands at his sides, his almost military trained, blank expression back on his face.

Mingyu made his way into the kitchen. He glanced around the area, examining everything Wonwoo had been doing. “Carbonara?” Mingyu asked, peering down into the pot of boiled noodles and spices.

Wonwoo slowly nodded his head, his face void of expression. “Yes sir,” He bellowed clearly. Mingyu raised his brow in curiosity as he looked closer at the dish in front if him. “Well I can already tell that you're going to need more cheese. It's not nearly thick enough,” Mingyu began.

The young chef reached over to grab the nearest utensil, the spoon Wonwoo had used to stir the pasta. Mingyu dipped the spoon into the pan and brought it to his lips. Mingyu stuck his tongue out to taste the sauce Wonwoo had doused his noodles in.

The was a stale silence in the air as Wonwoo waited for Mingyu to say something. He cursed himself under his breath for being loud enough to wake Mingyu up all the way in his upstairs apartment.

His heart was beating painfully inside his chest while he waited for the chef to make up his mind about liking his dish. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Mingyu finally started to talk. “It’s not bad. There’s just a tad too much salt, and too little sauce. But the taste, for being so simple, is not bad at all.” Mingyu muttered as he overanalyzed what was supposed to be Wonwoo’s dinner.

Mingyu set the spoon back down on the counter and turned around to face Wonwoo. He pointed his finger at the older man, a smile bright on his cheery features. “You made this?” In response, Wonwoo furiously nodded his head, his lips sealed together.

Mingyu raised his brows in curiosity. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his grey sweatpants and casually stepped closer to the silent man  “Do you usually come down to cook?”

Again, the silent nodding.

Mingyu let out a breathy laugh and shook his head. “If I had known that you could cook, I'd have tried to help you much sooner. You're not bad I'm quite impressed actually. I'd say that you could easily, with a little bit of help,  be on the same level as those trio of dummies that run my line.”

Wonwoo shook his head this time, “I'm not that good,” he mumbled timidly. He tied his fingers together and rocked on his heels, trying to find ways to escape this conversation.

Mingyu raised his hand and extended his finger to point at Wonwoo. “And that's where you're wrong. You have potential and I want to be the one to bring it out of you.”

Wonwoo only stared at Mingyu as he tried to understand what he was saying. This is the most Wonwoo had ever talked to Mingyu and he was already blurting nonsense about teaching him how to cook.

Mingyu lowered his hand and cleared his throat. “What I'm trying to say is that I see potential in you and I'm willing to work with you, after hours, to get you to a point where you can cook with us. How does that sound?”

Wonwoo was speechless. Yet somehow, unconsciously, he nodded his head and agreed to Mingyus offer.

Mingyu grinned, reaching over to grab Wonwoos shoulder and hold it tightly. “Great, we'll start tomorrow night.” The chef looked around his messy kitchen and chuckled. “Finish up here then head home, you have a long day tomorrow.” He said as he started his stride up the stairs.

Wonwoo furrowed his brows but shook away his confusion as he strived to finish his project.

“Mince the parsley into fine pieces. It always looks better when you use it to garnish your meals afterwards.” Mingyu stood over Wonwoos shoulder, watching his every move with hawk-like vigor.

Wonwoos shoulders constricted and tightened the closer Mingyu came to him. He moved his knife across the cutting board, doing exactly what Mingyu instructed him to do with almost frightening ease and accuracy.

“Give me the knife” Mingyu interjected from behind. Wonwoo froze, the knife still a centimeter in the air. “What?” Wonwoo asked in a low, breathy voice.

“Give me the knife. You're so nervous that even I want to tense up. You're going to cut yourself.” Mingyu plucked the knife from Wonwoos hand and set it back down safely. Mingyu inched back away from Wonwoo and let out a defeated sigh.

“Do I scare you that much? Every time I come near you, you tense up and become as stiff as a statue.” Mingyu sounded hurt by the fact that Wonwoo was so nervous to be around him, but the mere fact also made him curious.

Wonwoo merely shook his head. He brought his now free hand up to adjust his wire rimmed glasses that sat neatly on his nose. “I’m just not very fond of talking.” The older man mumbled as he reached over to grab the knife Mingyu had taken from him.

Mingyu half smiled, crossing his arms over his chest. He leaned back and watched Wonwoo’s every move, from his knife strokes to the way he bit his lip in concentration. He was intrigued, watching the man before him as if he had never seen him before.

“Do you talk with anyone else in the kitchen?” Mingyu asked, raising his tone an extra octave to seem friendlier. Wonwoo sighed and pushed the finished parsley to the side of the cutting board.

“Sometimes Joshua. But I’m not very close with him.” Muttered Wonwoo as he focused on the next task at hand. He picked up a tomato, examining it carefully before he started to dice it into small cubes.

Though, Mingyu was no longer interested in the kitchen, or really anything pertaining to the food anymore. Wonwoo had caught his interest and it was going to take a lot to shake him out of it.

“Why don’t you talk to anyone e- “

Mingyu was cut off by Wonwoo dropping the knife on to the counter. “I think that’s enough for tonight. We have to be up tomorrow fairly early, so I think it’s best if we both went home.” Wonwoo scurried around, trying to put everything away as quickly as he could.

And before he knew it, Wonwoo was walking away, taking long strides towards the exit, leaving Mingyu to question what exactly had just happened.

        It had been a week after the lessons had begun with Wonwoo, and Mingyu was on the prowl to obtain more information about his star pupil. He had mulled over the words he had said, contemplating whether or not he should go through with his plan to ask Joshua about the quiet kitchen assistant.

        In the end, he voted in favor with doing so.

        It was in the middle of the day, the quiet transition from lunch to dinner, when Mingyu approached Joshua.

        He had carried various vegetables over to a workstation, where Joshua held deep concentration in the cake that he was decorating. He hummed a song to himself, too enthralled with his work to notice his surroundings around him.

        Mingyu rolled the vegetables on to the counter and tapped Joshua on the shoulder.

        The older man flinched, obviously startled by the sudden interruption of his thoughts. He turned around quickly to see who the culprit was. He had expected Seokmin or even Minghao to be behind him, not Mingyu, who stood too close in the cozy space.

        “Hi Chef,” Joshua said warily, wondering why Mingyu had suddenly come up to speak with him. Mingyu smiled, his smile flashing like a diamond. “Hey Josh.” He said, trying to sound as light and bubbly as possible.

        Joshua furrowed his brows and nodded his head, “What are you doing over here? You never come over.” Joshua said warily, switching his attention from the chef to the vegetables that sat on the counter.

        Mingyu shook his head, taking one of the knives from the shelves to begin his prep. “I came to ask a couple of questions.” He said blatantly.

        Joshua nodded, going back to decorating his cake. “Okay, shoot.”

        Mingyu, taking a deep breath, started to cut into a leak as he thought of what to say. “What do you know of Wonwoo?”

        Joshua halted his icing, stunned by the curious question. “Why do you want to know?” He asked in response, wondering why the chef was suddenly so intrigued by the kitchen assistant.

        Mingyu shook his head, not tearing his eyes away from the leaks. “I was just wondering about it. I don’t know anything abo- “

“Why are you suddenly so interested in Wonwoo?” Joshua questioned, speaking in a low, hushed tone. He was afraid that one of the other kitchen members would pick up on the almost sacred conversation.

Mingyu shrugged his broad shoulders casually as he focused his attention on the leak in front of him, feigning fake disinterest. “He’s on of my employees. Shouldn’t I be curious about who they are?” He said with a breathy laugh, as if he had no other intentions behind this conversation.

Joshua raised a brow, staring at his boss curiously. “He’s worked here a year, and not once have you ever bothered to ‘know more about him’ so what suddenly peaked your interest?” Joshua raised his voice a bit, going from a soft whisper to an almost loud mumble.

Mingyu shook his head, grinning at the young pastry chef. “No reason really, what do you know of him?” He asked the question once more.

Joshua pursed his lips into a thin line, turning away from Mingyu and focusing back on the cake in front of him. “I know that he likes chocolate, cats, and books. I also know that he’s not going to be one of your ditsy playthings that you tote around so carelessly.” Joshua grumbled. The older man quickened his movements around the cake, embellishing the décor at rapid speed as he spoke the harsh words to Mingyu.

Mingyu stared at Joshua in awe. Not once had one of his employees ever spoke to him like that. He was caught of guard by his words, but he couldn’t blame him for saying them. He crossed his arms over his chest and shook his head slowly. “And what if he was to become one of my so called ‘playthings’?” Mingyu teased, scrunching his fingers up into quotations.

Joshua set down his frosting pipe, fully turning towards the chef. “Why would you use him like that? It’s sick a-“

Mingyu held up a finger to silence him. “It’s a good thing that I don’t plan on it. I see potential in Wonwoo and I plan on training him for the kitchen. I wanted to know more about him before I made a decision.”

Joshua blinked his surprise away, his face flushed red from embarrassment. “You just want to train him for the kitchen?” He repeated Mingyu’s statement, making sure that he heard him correctly.

Mingyu nodded his head, drawing his finger away from Joshua’s mouth. “Yes, nothing more, nothing less.” The chef grabbed his supplies from the kitchen counter and collected them in his arms. Though, before he left, he leaned in to the flustered Joshua, smirking.

“Though, by your reaction, you might be hiding a little something.” He whispered before turning away, walking towards his station at the center of the kitchen.

“Hey Wonwoo, can you chop these for me?” He called out as he got back to work.

Joshua, still staring at the empty space where Mingyu had stood, shaking his head of protruding thoughts and forced himself to get back to work.  

Wonwoo soon came rushing past, answering to Mingyu’s every beck and call.

[lightsandlostbells]

Skam France 2.10 and 2.11 reaction

Skam France dropped two episodes last week, so I’m gonna put them together. 

this is another angry recap so heads up if you’re not into those

Episode 10

Clip 1 - Mickael and Lisa are very loud

Right off the bat - worst birthday ever. Making it Manon’s birthday was a good way to adapt these scenes into a holiday setting, though.

Are they play-acting so Manon can hear, or is this supposed to be a conversation between them and they’re careless enough to be too loud?

Actually I think this is a real conversation, not a performance for Manon. I think Lisa is sincere and she’s genuinely forgotten Manon’s birthday. Also that she really thinks for a second they’ve got to celebrate the pope’s birthday.

Lisa saying she misses Manon is sweet. Pretty sure they’re not going to delve into this family relationship or anything but it’s nice especially considering Lisa seems quite cantankerous. 

Lisa telling Mickael to open the door faster made me laugh for some reason. She doesn’t have time to prolong the drama.

This whole conversation is funny but poor Manon, she just wants to shut out the world.

Clip 2 - Mickael gets real

Manon’s actress continues to do a good job. She looks so tired and beaten down by everything.

Mickael and Lisa are both cute in their rendition of Happy Birthday! Lisa has so much more energy than Linn. 

“We’re sorry to steal from your cupboards all the time and ruin your life like leeches from hell.” lmao I love Mickael. 

I was apprehensive following the previous scene, because we got a funny conversation between Mickael and Lisa, but not the more serious and caring side of Mickael and the talk with Eskild that was in the original clip. I was worried because overall his character has felt less nurturing than Eskild and he hasn’t seemed to have as close of a bond with Manon - there were a few moments that were played more for humor than to indicate a strong relationship. It made me nervous that they were taking Mickael more in the direction of “gay comic relief” rather than showing his more substantial sides. So the fact they followed up the earlier conversation with Michael talking to Manon in a heavier way here was reassuring. We get to see his more caring side. He sympathizes with her and acknowledges how much he talks about his life but offers to listen as well. The actor is great and I hope they continue to give him the meatier material, especially in S3

I know he’s saying it because he’s worried, but telling a person with an eating disorder she has to eat entirety of her tray maybe isn’t the best advice? Though I doubt he knows about her ED.

Clip 3 - Charles shows up

I do think it makes it more random and less sense that she’d be like “go party with your friends, Charles” when it’s her own birthday. Or does he know that? He has to know that, didn’t he get her the cake? He’d probably see it on social media?

This is in my opinion the best Noorhelm scene of that relationship, and it almost was of Marles, too. Charles/William acts like a decent person, comes in semi-confrontational but gets his priorities straight when he sees that Manon/Noora is breaking down and panicking, and tries to calm her down and support her. The original scene of him lying down with Noora was genuinely touching and supportive.

They were on the right track and then they botched it. I have an anxiety disorder. I have had panic attacks. I know how scary they are. You don’t  “help” someone with a panic attack by physically picking them and making them leave despite them crying at you they don’t want to go out. What the hell. Why would they add that?

I mean I feel like there’s some weird gender shit going on here, with Charles being the alpha male type and then Manon being the fragile woman and it’s OK for Charles to ignore what she’s saying because Charles Knows Best. Not to mention this is the show’s idea of a swoon-worthy moment. We gotta get the guy carrying the girl around like a little doll. 

Lol, I even saw some weird justification of this moment along the lines of “Well, if she really didn’t want to go out, I’m sure he would have respected that.” She’s crying and telling him she doesn’t want to go out. What more does she have to do to get the message across? Does she have to physically fight him?

Clip 4 - Birthday cake

Well, the cake looks pretty, and at least they wrote in a new scene to acknowledge her birthday.

Also, don’t totally love that he took her phone away. I get it, he probably wants her to just chill, but in connection with everything else, it’s just another small way he’s jumping in and making decisions for her. I would not have been as annoyed if this wasn’t a pattern in their relationship or if this wasn’t immediately following a moment where Charles overrides Manon’s pleas on how to handle her own panic attack.

This scene of them on the rooftop felt like something out of a kdrama in terms of music and slow motion staring at each other. Or at least how I remember the kdramas I’ve seen.

I don’t get why he needed to take her to the rooftop other than the #aesthetic since he just carries her back to her room. I know it’s where their first date was, but she was freaking out and panicking when he tried to make her leave. I really can’t get over that! Whyyy did they need that moment?

Did Charles look at her phone? Sort of dilutes the impact of him not reading her Facebook messages. 

He muted the volume on her computer at least.

Episode 11

Clip 1 - Charles writing

I guess Charles was up writing this article for a while since it’s like 5 in the morning.

Confession time: I’ve never really liked that William (and now Charles) wrote the article for her. I know it’s considered to be one of the better things he did for her but even when I was watching S2 for the first time, I was like 😕 “Can’t they give me something to like about him that I don’t have reservations about?” I don’t think this was a terrible horrible thing he did, and admittedly I am bringing personal feelings into this situation, but it’s just something that I would not be OK with if someone did it for me without telling me first. I would be really panicked and upset if someone did this to me even if they meant it to be a kindness. He wrote the article and submitted it without her consent. Her name is on it. That means she’ll be held accountable for whatever the article says. Consider that Manon and Charles have been disagreeing on tons of topics so far - in fact Charles’ ability to make Manon rethink her opinions is a point that has been explicitly made about their relationship. So when it comes to the article, how can you expect that Manon and Charles would agree on the same points? Someone can be well-intentioned and still say stuff that’s a bit clueless, or make a mistake, and then it’s Manon who would be responsible. This only works if you assume Charles was a great writer with the right opinions - it excuses the action based on the outcome, without considering if the action itself is appropriate. (Which, to be frank, is true of many actions in this season.)

I would’ve preferred if he’d written it and then shown it to her to get her approval before sending. (“But that would have ruined the surprise/she wouldn’t have agreed to send it” - uh, too bad? She should get a voice in this. I get that she’s dealing with serious anxiety, I know what that feels like. But lol, imagine the resulting anxiety if Charles had sent out the article and it had a bunch of errors or some questionable opinions in it and Manon was criticized for it.)

The best case scenario is that he just took her notes and compiled them into something cohesive, which was somewhat implied, but she didn’t have enough notes to make a long enough article without him injecting his own thoughts.

Clips 2 and 3 - Manon and her girls

Did Charles make her tea? Now that’s a nice gesture.

Charles is watching her sleep, just to bring in those true Edward Cullen vibes. Manon was right about this being Twilight!

Lmao, explain to me why she had to wear that tiny dress? That looks like something I’d have worn to a middle school dance when I still had braces. It’s not Norwegian Constitution Day where the girls are going to be dressed up. It’s Manon’s birthday - she can dress however the hell she wants. She doesn’t have to dress up, she could wear her normal clothes. She could roll over to the party in sweats and a nacho cheese-stained T-shirt. 

The music and imagery in the last two clips has been getting super soap opera-ish.

And when Manon shows up, the other girls are wearing their normal clothes, jeans and comfy clothes. Again, why did Manon need the dress?

Heh, how much did they pay for the rights to sing Happy Birthday? Or is it only in the US that you have to cough up a pretty penny to use it on TV?

I looked it up and apparently the song was officially recognized to be in the public domain in 2016! Good to know.

The girls are very cute performing Happy Birthday, though. Love the placement of the birthday hats at jaunty angles.

I’m not really qualified to talk about this as a non-Norwegian but I’ve read a bit about the patriotic themes in S2, and how it’s fitting that Noora tells the girls on Constitution Day (how living in a free, democratic country means you have to believe the law will protect you from assholes like Niko) and that ties in to the overall motifs of the season, and so that’s obviously lost here. It’s a missed opportunity, especially with the article. I think if they tried harder they could have written, you know ... something that related more to this adaptation and French youth, instead of repeating a speech that specifically about Norwegian culture. That’s the bare minimum, my dudes.

Like when Daphne says they need to go to the police because they’re in France and the law will protect them ... I mean, sure, but it’s just one of those things that lacks the thematic relevance of the original as it’s not a national holiday at the time.

(They’re going to do 21:21 for S3 without any changes, aren’t they? Goddammit. I will believe them that they’re changing the storyline when I see it and not just hear it.)

A minor nitpick: I also feel like it’s kinda odd to read her article aloud? It made sense with Noora since it related to the holiday they were celebrating and could fit into their festivities but this is just a random article. In that case I’d find it weird if my friends just started reading something I’d written out loud. I mean it’s one thing to congratulate her for a job well done but IDK, felt out of place. 

But Emma only gets a few lines in, so thankfully we didn’t have to hear the whole thing awkwardly re-purposed for this remake.

Poor Manon with tears in her eyes. Her acting continues to be very good. Manon is more openly emotional and sad than Noora, who seems more like she freezes or shuts down or tries to close herself off.

Hug pile :(

Loved to see Daphne be at the forefront of taking Manon to the hospital and supporting her while they’re there.

Clip 4 - Justice

Nico is such a rat.

Also his ass is dumb.

But that’s no surprise.

Manon is more no nonsense and less playing with Nico than Noora was. 

Actually I preferred that they cut out the line about not dropping the soap and had her throw her drink in his face instead, good job, Manon! That was satisfying.

Clip 5 - The point of no return

So. This is the part when watching the original series where I knew I could never like William or Noorhelm. 

I’m going to go into a personal tangent, skip if you want. I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned how I got into Skam in one of these recaps so my apologies if I’m repeating the story. 

I discovered Skam completely randomly during S3, via a YouTube recommendation. Of all things, strangely it was because I had watched a preview for the show Eyewitness, which was an American remake of a Norwegian show about two boys who witness some murders while making out in the woods. I enjoy crime stories/mysteries and the premise sounded intriguing, so I watched the first 10 minutes of the pilot that the network had put on YouTube as a teaser, and then some interviews talking about the show. Eyewitness turned out to not to be my thing and I didn’t watch more than a few episodes, but because I’d watched it, YouTube started recommending me clips from other shows with gay couples, including Skam. One night I was bored and decided to finally click on one of the Skam clips. I was hooked right away, impressed by the writing, directing, acting, and chemistry.

This was still really early in Skam’s viral spread during the fall/winter of 2016. There wasn’t nearly the amount of information and organized how-to-watch-Skam guides available in English at this point. I learned about the social media concept and real-time distribution of the show from reading the YouTube comments. The first clip I got to watch in real time was the pool scene. If you were there at the time, you might remember the 10-day hiatus between episodes 5 and 6. That was when I decided to watch seasons 1 and 2. Before that point, I had not heard a single bad thing about Noorhelm, William, or S2. In fact, I only heard overwhelming praise from the YouTube comments - people commenting that they missed William, encouraging people to watch the previous seasons and singling out S2 as an amazing storyline (and a number of people saying S1 was boring but to stick it out to S2), telling people Noora and William’s relationship was fantastic. I mention this because for some reason, certain fans are under the impression that people decided to randomly hate S2/Noorhelm/William based on opinions they read on Tumblr and it’s only bandwagon hate. So this is just to say - I did not go into S2 with any negative expectations. I wouldn’t even say I was hyping it too much in my mind so that I was bound to be disappointed. I just expected it to be decent television.

I watched S1 in like a day and loved it. I especially admired how all of the characters had both good and bad sides, and how the characters who easily could have been demonized, like Ingrid and Iben, were made into human and sympathetic figures by the season’s end. Did not love William’s behavior at all, thought he was a creep, but hey, he apologized to Vilde at the end of the season! That must be the character development I saw people mention in the comments! And so I reasoned that S2 would redeem William and manage to sell me on Noora/William. It wasn’t my preferred storyline but I loved S1 and I loved what had been released of S3 so far, so they could probably make me enjoy it, right? And besides, S1 had been pretty good in a lot of ways about sexism and gender roles, I trusted the show to continue that into S2.

So I started S2. And I saw William text Noora even when she’d rejected him. Okay, I thought, not a great start, but it’s the beginning of the season. Surely this behavior will be addressed, and he has plenty of time to change his attitude. And I saw William use Vilde in order to finally get Noora on that date. Yikes, I thought, I thought he was supposed to get better? This is textbook male entitlement. I didn’t feel OK with his behavior.

But OK, we’re only on episode 2! So much time to turn it around! And then we learned that William apologized to Vilde in exchange for a date with Noora. Errrr, that makes his apology a lot less satisfying and much more self-serving, I thought. And then I watched William take Noora on a date, and Noora confront William with his shitty behavior toward her and Vilde, and to my great bafflement, I saw William not express regret for his actions, but instead justify his actions not once, but repeatedly, with reasons that were flimsy at best and appalling at worst. I saw Noora tell William he had manipulated her in order to get her on that date and William deny it and turn it back on Noora. The scene made me furious. At that moment I hated William even more than I’d disliked him in S1 - because S1 was supposed to show him at his worst and ended with a moment of him displaying some self-improvement. Why the fresh hell would we then get this scene that effectively erased that character growth in order to show how selfish his motivations really were? I hated that scene. Hated hated hated it.

We were still early in the season, though. And episode 3 had admittedly a nice scene of Noora and William hanging out together - it was a nice scene because Noora was so cute, though, not because of much to do with William, and marred by William saying some misogynistic crap and then not owning up to it when called on it. But all right. It was progress. 

Throughout the season, however, there was a pattern, where there would be a moment where William seemed decent for a fraction of a second, only to show his ass and do something I found obnoxious, entitled, or awful shortly afterwards. The midseason peak was him bashing a bottle over a dude’s head, justifying it, and belittling Noora for not understanding his Great and Important motivations for bashing a bottle over the guy’s head. This was followed by a scene I found horrific in which the show’s designated voice of reason told Noora that she needed to understand why her boyfriend bashed a bottle over a guy’s head, or else it was unreasonable and just like how war begins or some shit like that, in response to Noora’s objections to her boyfriend being violent. Viewing this scene was deeply surreal, as I was aware that this was the voice of the writer telling me why I should like William or why it was wrong for me to dislike William. The scene’s message made no sense in context.

At this point I had realized I probably wasn’t going to like William - in addition to his crappy behavior and attitude, he wasn’t written in a particularly compelling or 3D way, and the performance wasn’t charismatic enough to hold my interest (although I want to stress that it wasn’t the deal-breaker and I could tolerate mediocre acting for a well-written complex character). Yet I held out a little bit of hope that there would be an 11th hour revelation or redemption arc where we could see how much William had grown and the sexism and male entitlement that had been threaded throughout the season would be addressed properly. We got William calming down Noora from anxiety in what I thought was a genuinely lovely scene. I didn’t much care for him writing the article but it wasn’t something I hated him for. For a moment, things seemed like they might turn around.

And then, we came to this clip. The point of no return.

A scene in which William gets in Noora’s face, towers over her, doesn’t hear her out, shakes her off and leaves her crying in the middle of the schoolyard. 

That would be bad enough as it is, though I can maybe understand his reaction in the heat of the moment. Maybe. But it wasn’t until I read the text messages afterwards that I was well and truly done. Noora texts William like an hour after this scene happens. She explicitly says that if anything happened between her and Niko, it would have been assault, she blacked out, and she’s pressed charges against Niko. And William ignored her for days afterwards.

This is so unbelievably cruel that it killed any hope I had for this storyline, it killed any possibility that I could like his character or root for this relationship. He knows she might have been raped and he ignores her when she is pleading for him to talk to her. He doesn’t reach out to her on his own, either; it takes Noora tracking him down and demanding his attention. I don’t remember him ever specifically apologizing for this behavior (if he did and I forgot about it, feel free to remind me). He apologizes for Niko. Not for himself.

Imagine Noora, who still thinks she may have been assaulted, who is still dealing with the trauma, having to also deal with the boyfriend she loves abandoning her and shutting her out. Imagine how tender William was with her earlier in the episode as he saw she was breaking down, and how it feels when he withdraws that tenderness after he finds out the reason why she was breaking down in the first place.

Let’s not even get into the real-life context of this scene, and how rape victims are often treated like dirt by friends, family, and romantic partners after they come forward about their assault. Let’s just mention that rape victims fear their loved ones won’t believe them, will blame them, or reject them, to the point where it’s a huge factor in why they don’t come forward, and that what happens with Noora here when William leaves is the embodiment of that fear.

It’s not just that William has flaws. Everyone on this show has flaws. It’s the way his flaws are handled. There is too much baggage with his character in terms of real-life sexism and gender roles, too little remorse and empathy from the character himself, that it’s beyond what I can enjoy in a fictional love interest.

“We don’t know what Niko may have told him.” That’s true, and I did consider that at the time. But you know what? William knows Niko is a creep. If Niko made any kinds of threats toward Noora, if there was any way he misled William other than just saying Noora was a slut who threw herself at him or anything we could have predicted knowing what we’ve seen from Niko, we needed to hear about it once the situation had been cleared up. Julie needed to have William explain so we know he at least had an understandable, non-self-centered motivation for reacting the way he did.

“William was just hurt/didn’t know how to deal.” I cannot stress how much I don’t give a shit about how William was so hurt compared to how Noora must feel in this situation. Noora told him rape may have happened. Why in the world would I prioritize William’s feelings over the feelings of a sexual assault victim in relation to her own potential rape? 

Fuck William. Fuck Charles. Fuck this narrative that is constantly putting a guy’s boner feels and manpain above the female lead’s agency, rational concerns, and mental health. Fuck this narrative that is constantly encouraging us to empathize and understand an entitled dude’s emotions and actions, including sexism and violence, while the same entitled dude shows little empathy or understanding for a potential rape victim, a girl whose self-image was damaged by him telling her she wasn’t attractive enough, or a girl who rejects him romantically. Fuck the double standards of women having to understand and empathize with men when they are behaving like assholes but men not having to empathize or show compassion to women, including when they are victimized, by putting aside their own feelings for a goddamn minute.

Anyway, back to the Skam France clip.

Daphne got aroused from kissing Emma … hmmm

Once again, absolutely no comment from or about the supposedly bi girl sitting right there with them, which might change the context of the scene a bit.

This soap opera music starting as Charles comes thundering up to Manon.

DID THIS ASSHOLE MOVE IMANE OUT OF THE WAY WHEN SHE TOLD HIM TO WAIT

FUCK YOU DUDE

DID HE SHOVE MANON AGAINST THE WINDOW

“Answer yes or no” “I don’t know.” YOUR FIRST CLUE, JACKASS.

oh BOO FUCKING HOO Charles is crying, so glad this is about his hurt feelings and not his girlfriend potentially being raped.

Oh cool and he knocked her on the floor so she’s crying on the ground, great, she thinks she might have been raped and here’s what we have now. 

SHE TEXTS HIM AFTERWARDS. AND TELLS HIM. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN AGAINST HER WILL.

HOW DID THEY MAKE THIS SCENE WORSE

General Comments

I was willing to give Marles a chance in the hopes that they would rewrite the worst parts of this relationship, but instead it’s like they’ve double down on Charles’ domineering bullshit and it makes me so angry. That’s really all I have to say. 

I’m not French so if I misunderstood some context, feel free to correct me.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

[dreammeposts]

Is it fate? (Ch. 5)

Finally the 5th chapter! Sorry for so long delay. A lot of work. Just tonns of work, a deadline of very important task and, of course, I must catch a cold in august:/

“The Defender of Justice and his assistant are here to save the world,” Saeyoung announced right at the moment I opened a front door to him and MC.

“Hi!” I moved to the side to let the couple in my apartment, or, to be more precise, my ex-apartment starting from tomorrow morning.

“Are we late?” MC asked, while was looking around the hall, which was filled with cardboard boxes.

I wondered why her voice sounded so disappointed.

“No, actually you are even a little bit too early,” I reassured them. “You can wait in a living room while I'm packing last cooking utensils in a kitchen.”

“We can help,” Saeyoung offered enthusiastically.

I worriedly looked at him. Sometimes he and MC seemed too easy distracted and full of strange ideas. It wasn't like I didn't trust them, but I wondered was it wise to call them to help.

Are you kidding? As if you have anybody else, who can help, except of your cousin and her fiancé.

My inner voice was right. I just had to be grateful that MC agreed so gladly to waste a whole day, helping me. Yes, my cousin and her fiancé looked a bit strange in their matching blue jeans, red t-shirts and even matching sneakers. The only differing detail was that MC wore a red baseball cap, and Saeyoung had a cross necklace on his chest. And even before meeting Saeyoung my cousin weird jokes and some questionable ideas made me worry. But who cared when both of them were nice enough to offer their help. And what probably could go wrong in the living room?

“Okay,” I sighed, “if you're really want to help, you can pack books from last two shelves in the living room.”

“Hooray,” Saeyoung jolted his hands up to the air, “the mission 'Moving out' has officially started.”

A timid knock at the door interrupted that little show. I nervously looked at a clock above the door. It was too early for a rental truck driver.

“I guess, it's the last member of our rescue team,” MC smiled. “We asked a friend for a help. I hope, you don't mind.”

“Why would she?” her fiancé said, opening the door instead of me.

I wasn't even surprised to see, who was standing outside. And still I couldn't say a word, quietly staring at my new guest.

Hyun's look was something I needed to accustom, and I hadn't seen him for three days since our walk in park. Nor following his accounts in social networks with bunch of selfies (Oh, god, seriously, this guy has mania of taking selfies!), nor re-watching for several times every video of his performances in internet couldn't prepare me for how godlike he looked even when he wore just a simple faded blue jeans, a white tank top and sneakers.

I was dazzled and lost for words again. But the moment I heard his cheerful “Hey, Jia!” all changed.

For the last three days after our walk in the park Hyun called me every evening. We sent 'goodmorning' messages to each other or made just random calls, when we had a free minute at work. His voice became a part of my life. So hearing him right now in front of me woke up something warm inside me.

“Hey,” I gave him a tentative smile, “why are you here?”

“Saeyoung said that you need a help,” he shrugged. “How could I say 'no' when you've helped me so much in the last few days.”

I've helped him? How?

His words made no sense to me. It was him, who helped me to have the last several nights without nightmares. It were his calm voice and distracting stories about his day that made me fall asleep without worries and without dreams. I wanted to say all that to him, but I couldn't do it in front of Saeyoung and MC. So I only looked gratefully at the most handsome human being standing in my hallway and quietly said my thank you.

“So why are you moving?” Hyun asked, picking up one of boxes to put it in the hall.

All my 'rescue team' refused to wait with help till the rental truck arrived, so now we divided our forces in two groups. My cousin and Saeyoung were fighting with amazing amount of books in the living room, while Hyun and I were packing the rest of cooking utensils.

“The same reason as anybody else,” there was no mystery in my decision, “The owner of this apartment suddenly wants to increase rent, and I can't longer afford it.”

“Yeah, that sucks,” my conversation partner agreed. “And the new place?”

“The new place...” I said thoughtfully, “The new place is good. It smaller and don't have such good access to transport, but it is closer to my workplace,” I stood on tiptoe, trying to reach one of pots at upper shelf of the cupboard, while describing my future apartment, “And it still is in a very safe part of the city.”

I heard an unexpected long sigh near me. Suddenly a warm and well-toned body was pressed against me. My pulse quickened. Frozen I watched, how a long hand took the pot from the shelf and put it in front of me on a table.

“You know, you always can ask for help,” I heard Hyun's voice almost near my ear.

His words sounded a little bit annoyed. But I was so overwhelmed by his closeness, that I couldn't think about any answer to him. I nervously shifted my weight. Hyun got a hint and took a few steps back. I could still feel his warmth near me, but now my head was able to think about anything else except actor's chest and hips pressed to me. I turned around.

“Why didn't you ask me to help?” Hyun repeated his previous comment as a question, getting me back to reality.

“I thought, I can reach this pot by myself,” answering, I tried to look as calm as it was possible.

“You know, I'm not talking about the pot,” the actor sighed again. “I'm leaving nearby, you knew I can help as well as Saeyoung. Why did you call him instead?”

Is it my imagination or I heard a hint of jealousy?

I stopped my self before that strange thought got me to any other conclusions. Hyun couldn't have such feelings, because we were just friends and knew each other only for a less than a week.

Maybe it is some kind of men's competition: to be strongest, the most helpful, etc.

“I called MC, not Saeyoung. She is my cousin, you remember this, right? And Saeyoung is her fiancé. And it's only my decision, what I do with my relatives,” my answer sounded a bit irritated. “Anyway, how come you are here? Didn't you tell me that you have a date with female lead of your play today?” I reminded him.

“What?” he exclaimed nervously. “It's not a date, it's just a rehearsal.”

The tips of his ears were slightly red now.

“A private rehearsal,” I noted. “Only she and you in an empty theatre.”

“It won't be empty,” the guy disagreed. “There is always a staff or actor's casts for other plays. And we supposed to have this rehearsal only for play's sake. We still didn't find the right way to play our romantic scenes.”

“So why are you here? Why aren't you working for a right atmosphere of your love scenes?” I interrupted his explanation. I was not sure why this was bothering me so much.

“It was cancelled. My partner from play, she needs to attend an important party tonight, so she can't find time for a rehearsal. Though, she invited me to go with her,” the actor confessed.

“And you say that she is not interested in dating with you? Private rehearsals, an invitation to attend a party together...” I was surprised by Hyun's unobservance.

“She is a star, she's dating celebrity. Why would she be interested in an mediocre musical actor.” Before I could object him, Hyun added another explanation, “Anyway, I'm not interested in her this way. Actually I'm...”

A thud and a following muffled shout interrupted the guy in the middle of his words. We heard something like 'no, no, no' exclaimed by someone and than quiet, but well-recognizable 'shit' that certainly was said by Saeyoung.

Hyun and I exchanged worried looks and hurried to the living room.

The living room was a mess. Of course, there had been a slight mess caused by my moving earlier, too. But now, covered with paper, the room looked like after a little tornado. White sheets of paper was on the floor, on furniture, on boxes, and even on Saeyoung.

Yes, the strangest part of a view of the living room was the couple, responsible for all that disaster. I wasn't sure what exactly surprised me the most. Maybe that was MC, holding one side of the shelf, where a half an hour ago were my books. But maybe it was Saeyoung, lying on the floor under the second side of that shelf and buried under papers and books from that shelf.

Seeing me, MC's eyes dilated, and she let out a nervous laugh.

“Are you okay?” I exhaled worriedly.

Hyun had already rushed to them to take a shelf from MC's hands. He put the wooden board near a wall and gave a hand to Saeyoung to help him to get out from the pile of books. The other guy got up with a groan. Thankfully, he didn't look like he had serious injuries.

“What happened?” I asked curiously.

“Well,” MC wiped her hands by her jeans and apologetically looked at me, “Saeyoung came up with a plan, how we can pack books faster...”

“Not a very good plan,” Saeyoung admitted, rubbing his butt.

“That must be an extraordinary stupid plan,” Hyun commented, “You could kill yourself, and hurt MC, and god knows what else could went wrong!”

“I know, I know,” Saeyoung agreed. “But we are okay, and I am sorry about all this.” He looked around.

“We’ll clean up the mess,” MC promised, bending over to take papers from the floor. “I hope, we didn’t ruin any important documents.”

“Don’t worry,” I reassured her. “It just sketches.”

I sat up near MC and started to pick up papers, too.

“Sketches?” Hyun repeated curiously. He and Saeyoung also joined to our cleaning.

“Just some drafts for my amateur comics, nothing special,” I shrugged.

“I love comics,” Saeyoung noted with a grin and turned a sheet of paper, he was holding, to look at it. “No way… MC, you have to see it.”

MC followed his suit and looked at other drawing in her hands.

“Is it… is it Stella?” I noticed a slight signs of worship in her voice.

“Who is Stella?” Hyun asked curiously. His eyes also drifted to a drawing in his hands. “Achew,” a loud sneeze, followed his questions, was so unexpected that I almost jumped.

Hyun’s eyes looked so shocked.

“Wha- achew!.. why, for a sake of... achew!.. are you drawing cats?” he managed to say between his sneezes, still looking at the drawing.

“Because the comic name is ‘Stella The Spycat’ obviously,” Saeyong stated. “Can’t believe I know the creator of Stella! This kitty is my third biggest crush!”

“The third?” I repeated.

“The third,” Saeyoung confirmed, “after MC and my dearest and loveliest Elly!”

“Elly?” lost I looked at MC.

“Elly is our friend’s cat,” MC explained, “Elizabeth the 3rd. She's Saeyoung's first love.”

She chuckled.

Of course, my cousin must find as crazy guy as herself.

“Achew! Don't mention this furball!” Hyun exclaimed between his sneezing.

I darted my gaze to him with concern. The actor looked really bad, constantly sneezing, with reddened face and tearing eyes.

Is he okay? Maybe he inhaled some dust?

“Hyun, are you okay? Maybe you need to get outside?” I asked worriedly.

“I'm sorry. I'm just allergic to cats,” he sneezed again. “Maybe you are ri- achew- right. I'll come back after a few minutes.”

He pushed his part of collected papers in my hands and rushed out of the room.

I stared at door perplexedly.

The allergy to drawn cats?

“He'll be okay,” MC reassured me. “It's just an allergy. To cats.” She soothingly patted my arm when noticed my astonishment, “I think it's something psychological, like a childhood trauma.”

“It became so bad only after Jumin brought Elly to that party,” Saeyoung mentioned.

“He is used to it and knows how to deal with that,” my cousin tried to convince me, but I still doubted if Hyun was okay.

“Maybe you just have to see yourself if he is okay,” Saeyoung offered.

I guess, my worries are too obvious.

I had to feel embarrassed, but I didn't care. Not right now, when all my thoughts was with the certain musical actor somewhere in my house.

“I guess, I'll do it,” I agreed and darted out of the living room.

”Are you feeling better?” I asked Hyun sheepishly.

I found the actor in the bathroom, washing his face. He rose head from a sink and looked in my direction. Guy's face was still red, but he wasn't sneezing anymore.

“Did you come to torture me with cat drawings more?” Hyun suddenly asked.

I followed his gaze and found out that I was still holding my sketches. I nervously hid them behind my back.

“I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring them here,” I stuttered, mentally I cursing my forgetfulness.

“Don't worry, I know, you are not sadistic," the guy smiled at me, sweetly, "It's just a coincidence. But I wanted to tease you a bit.”

“So, how are you?” I rephrased my question, handing Hyun a towel.

“Thank you,” the actor muttered, wiping his face. “I feel much better. I'm sorry if I startled you.”

He shouldn’t apologize to me, and I didn't know what to say back. Unfortunately the silence felt even more uncomfortable. It looked like Hyun was searching for a new subject for conversation too. His gaze travelled from one piece of bathroom’s furniture to another till it stopped on my hands.

“The way, you talked about my performances… I was sure that you can feel a beauty of art,” guy smiled again, looking at drawings in my hands. “But why of all wonderful things of this world you should choose this… fur… creatures?” he wrinkled.

“They are cute,” I defended my choice, “I had that great idea to make a comics about spies, and it was so easy to imagine a cat, working as a spy.”

I smiled at the memory of how I'd started to make my comics and noticed Hyun's frown. It was clear that he had a hard time to imagine, how I could like cats so much.

“Don’t worry,” I decided to assure the actor anyway. “My comics is not that famous. It won’t hunt you on billboards and buses,” I added with a smile.

“Seven… I mean Saeyoung... knows how to make things viral in internet. Maybe he can help you to promote your work.”

That reaction wasn't what I expected, making my small joke.

“Why, thanks,” I smirked, but it didn't sound too cheerful even for me, “actually I don't want anybody's help.”

I was rewarded with an interrogative glance from Hyun.

I guess, he needs some explanation.

“I just don't want to get fame or money only because I have good friends. I want that my comics became popular because of my talent, because it was special to my readers,” I sighed, wondering how to word that better.

“You are right,” the actor agreed enthusiastically, “there is no need for help if you work hard to reach your goal. And your drawings are so amazing! Of course, it'll pay off.”

It is nice to hear that, especially from Hyun, but I don't need sweet lies too.

“You haven't even seen my drawings to say that,” I pointed out.

“Why are you doubting me?” I heard notes of offence in guy's voice. “My allergy wouldn't become so bad if I didn't look at that furball for too long. No, no, not a furball, your character,” he corrected himself, giving me apologetic glances. “But if you don't mind, I rather won't look at it anymore. We don't want this beautiful face to be swollen tomorrow, and my eyes all puffy after so much sneezing.”

“Well, I have some non-cat drawings,” I found myself saying.

You just can't ignore the chance to get more compliments from him, you, greedy girl?

I mentally sighed in disgust of myself.

“Really? Can I see them?” I heard a sincere interest in Hyun's words.

It was impossible to resist. I instantly forgot about my self-loathing and rummaged into pile of drafts in my hands. I was sure I'd seen some usual (non-cat) drawings while collected papers from the floor. I felt a sudden jolt of excitement when I confirmed that I was right. With a smile I stared at a simple drawing of a vase at the window's sill.

“Here is one,” I passed it to Hyun, keeping dig through papers.

Unexpected excitement was bubbling in me. All my drawings without cats gradually travelled to hands of the guy in front of me. It worked almost like a conveyor: I found a safe drawing, passed it to Hyun, and he gushed and prised me about it.

So I followed the same scenario, when I found my next non-cat artwork. With an exclamation 'Oh, another one!' I was ready to give it to the guy in front of me, when my mind finally proceeded what is drawn there. My cheeks became red, and I tried to put the sheet of paper back in the pile, before the actor near me could get it in his hands, but I was to slow. Next moment Hyun was already looking on that embarrassing drawing. I held my breath, too afraid to look at guy's reaction and at the same time dying to know what he thought.

“Is it me?” finally Hyun asked. Actor's voice was too quiet to tell what kind of emotions was hidden behind his words.

I gazed at familiar lines on the paper. It was semi-finished draft of white siberian husky. As all my comics' characters it was drawn on two legs. Even husky's clothes, leather pants and a jacket, and a tank-top underneath, and background, a motorcycle, gave a hint, who exactly inspired that drawing. But dog's bright red eyes and a ponytail on its head left no doubt, who was that character prototype.

“I...” it was hard to find the right words for an answer. “I was too inspired with some of our conversations,” I admitted still embarrassed about that situation. “If you don't like it, I can change the character. I haven't used it in comics yet.”

Of course, he don't like it! It's not very flattering to be drawn as a dog.

“No!” unexpected emotions in Hyun's voice made me finally rise my head and meet his eyes.

I was stunned with how much various feelings I could see in guy's gaze. Astonishment, disbelief and delight wavered in his gaze, mixed with something else.

“It's so amazing,” the actor said almost with awe. “Nobody ever draw me, and this guy is so cool. Can I keep it?”

Does he really like it?

“Of course!” I answered still doubting that it was really happening.

“Thank you,” Hyun's eyes lit up even brighter, and his wide smile made me catch my breath.

How is it possible to look more beautiful than he was a second ago?

“Are you planing to draw this character more? If you ever need me to pose for it, just say a word,” he added, looking confusingly shy.

I froze. Just the idea of Hyun, posing for me made me dizzy.

Oh, no, no, no, I'm not doing this. Friends don't have such thoughts about each other!

"Would you really like to be a model for my drawings?" the question sounded uncertain. I still couldn't believe the actor might like such idea.

"I would love to," the guy reassured me.

And he did it again. He smiled at me. He smiled so brightly that I met his sparkling gaze and couldn't take my eyes off him. We both fell silent. Hyun looked at me, and I stared back. All my thoughts and wishes now concentrated in only one need - to see those scarlet, magical eyes forever. Something pleasantly shrank in my stomach, and I felt sudden impulse to touch that marble skin in front of me, to check its softness, delicacy. My hand almost rose to do it immediately. That was a moment when a sudden, long forgotten memory of other pair of shining eyes broke that magic.

'I love you, Jia. Will you be my sun, my stars and moon? Please, stay with me forever,' I heard in my head a familiar voice.

That's was it. That was a moment when it clicked in my head and I finally understood, what happening, why I was thinking about Hyun so much, why I could look at him whole day, not even getting a break for lunch or for sleep.  

Shit, shit, shit! Of course, it is it! I'm so stupid!

I was falling for him. Deeply. Miserably. And I knew where such feelings could lead.

I don't need lies in my life anymore.

Yes, I didn't need it. And I wouldn't let it happen again.

I lowered my head and shut eyes. The hot covered my cheeks, when I turned away from the actor.

"I guess, I have to get back and finish the packing," I dropped and hurried to the living room.

I won’t be able to write the next chapter for a couple of weeks. So there will be another delay in updates for a while. I’m sorry. Hope, you still liked it. Thank you for reading!

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4

[smilexcaptainx]

Chris Evans Imagine

Requested: Anonymous

Imagine: Hi there! Can you please write a Chris Evans imagine where you are a famous actress and Chris just got interviewed and revealed his celeb crush (Which is you) And you've found him pretty attractive as well. And so you meet him at Teen Choice Awards, after the show you go onto the carpet and you meet him there. And he's like fangirling a little bit because he's meeting you, and you start to talk and people start to think you're dating. And than you make the rumors true, and you two start to date.

A/N: it’s long ;3

Warning: None

‘’Now, Evans. Here is a question that everybody is dying to know,’’ the interviewer protests, straighting his papers and clearing his throat.

‘’Who is your celebrity crush?’’ he smirks.

The audience wasn’t quiet and reacted to the question, some people cheered, other people ‘oohed’ But Chris just started chuckling and hits his thigh with a smile curling on his lips. He bites his lip and looks off in thought, a few seconds passed by and a person suddenly popped into his mind.

‘’Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N. Definitely. She’s gorgeous. I love watching her movies, and she’s in so many movies, which is good because that means more of her for me,’’ chris laughs, making the crowd laugh along.

‘’But yeah, Y/N is my celebrity crush for sure. She’s honestly what keeps me going in my acting career, she’s my motivation. Not only is she beautiful, but she’s gives me so much inspiration, she makes me want to keep acting. And if I get lucky enough, maybe I can star in a movie with her one day. Even if I was an extra in a movie with her, that would be amazing!’’ chris says, getting a little eager talking about you.

‘’Have you met her yet?’’ the interviewer asks.

‘’Oh gosh, no! I wish I met her! If I met her, man, my life would be made. I could die happily, no joke. She’s just- Ugh, sorry, I’m just like fangirling over her a little bit.’’ chris laughs.

The audience claps and starts to cheer as the interview ended. Chris waved goodbye to everybody and left the stage.

You switch the TV off and a smile was on your face, and it couldn't be removed. Chris Evans just talked about you in an interview. You were getting ready for the Teen Choice Awards for tonight, you were nominated for an award. And for the past years, you haven't won quite yet, but you had a feeling you would this year. You made a movie with Tom Cruise, playing his love interest and his partner in crime.

And when that movie got released, you still couldn't believe that you made a movie with Tom. The Tom Cruise. It still made you smile whenever you thought of it. You've made movies with tons of famous actors, and each and every one of those movies, made you love life even more. But your next goal is to make a movie with Chris Evans, because he just looks like one of the most sweetest people in the world to you.

As you finished getting your dress all the way on, you checked one last time in the mirror and smiled at yourself. You than left to your car and headed to the Teen Choice Awards. As you arrived, you entered and saw a bunch of celebrities showing up, you went to your seat which was reserved just for you. You sat down and started to wait for the show to start, you arrived pretty early, but people started packing in after a while. You get out your phone and start to scroll through your Twitter and Instagram, smiling at all of the appreciation posts you were getting tagged in.

You continued to scroll until you got bumped and you dropped your phone. You gasped as it hit the ground.

''Oh, I'm so sorry love.'' you hear a british voice apologize.

You look to the side and saw that Harry Styles was right there, staring at you.

''I-It's okay, really.'' you say, bending down and picking it back up.

You bring it back up and brush it off, you observed it than let out a sigh of relief, it wasn't cracked. You look back at Harry who was sitting next to you, your heart about skipped a beat. You were a humongous fan of One Direction, Harry was your favorite as well. And the fact that Harry was sitting next to you right than and now, blew your mind. The show hasn't started quite yet and to your surprise, Harry sparked up a conversation with you.

After about an hour of talking with Harry Styles and the boys of One Direction, more celebrities started joining in and you made friends with more and more celebrities. All sorts or actors and actresses were speaking with you. But sadly, none of them were Chris Evans at the time. One of them was Chris Pine though, and he was also another beautiful human being. Most of the actors and actresses recognized you because they acted like you did, the singers didn't really know you, but they loved getting to know you.

The show finally started and you cheered loud and proud with all the friends around you. You had a complete blast watching who won and who was nominated. When it came to your category, you were so nervous, you were biting your nails. And to your luck, you won your category! Everyone cheered so loud, it felt like the whole building was going to blow up, you continued your way up to the stage.

You said your accepting speech and than thanked everybody, you got your first surfboard. Sweet. Chris Evans actually won his category as well and you cheered for him loudly, knowing he wouldn't hear, but he was worth screaming your lungs out for. The party went on, and it soon ended, sadning you but it was amazing while it lasted. You hugged everybody goodbye as you made your way outside to the carpet. You had to prepare yourself to keep a smile on your face and get ready for a bunch of flashes getting shot at you, practically blinding you by the second.

You strutted your way out of the building, paparazzi already surrounding you, screaming your name. You continued your way to the carpet and stood where they told you to stand, as you stood, you made a pose and started to smile and looked at other random places.

''Y/N! Over here! Baby! Over here!'' paparazzi kept yelling out.

You didn't know where to look, and it was hard because there were so many flashes, it felt like you were going blind. As you stood there with your hand on your hip, you suddenly feel a tap on your shoulder. You look over your shoulder and smiled as you saw who it was. It was Chris Evans!

''H-Hey.'' he smiles shyly.

''Chris! Hello!'' you exclaim, turning around to fully face him.

You pull him into a hug and kiss him on both cheeks, Chris did the exact same. And by the way that Chris was acting around you, it was pretty obvious he was severally nervous around you.

''Y-Y/N.. I-I can't believe I'm actually..'' chris lets out a big groan and smiles.

You giggle at his reaction, your smile actually became real as you spoke with Chris.

''Wow.. I can't believe that I'm actually speaking to you. Like, this is literally blowing my mind,'' you continued to listen to chris as he fangirled over you.

You laughed at some of his comments, and than you told him of how much you loved his movies. And his reaction was priceless.

''So, I saw that I was your celeb crush?'' you smirk.

''YOU SAW THAT?!'' chris screeches, covering his mouth in fear.

''Chris! Chris! It's okay!'' you laugh, trying to hold him from bursting in embarrassment.

''You're my celeb crush to.'' you blush.

You two started blushing, some interviewers suddenly took you away from Chris. But before you left, you got his number, you continued with the carpet and met all kinds of celebrities. Celebrity actors and singers, all of them were on the carpet you were roaming upon. After the carpet, you went back home and started texting Chris, he sent you photos showing that people are thinking that you and him are dating.

''What do you say we make those rumors come true?'' you text.

''What do you mean?''

''I'm saying we should date silly ;)'' you text.

Chris texted you an embarrassed emoji.

''Let's do it ;)'' chris texts.

''Tomorrow 7:00PM?'' you text.

''Deal.'' chris texts.

''See ya than Evans ♥'' you text

''♥♥♥'' chris texts back.

You smile and put your phone down, you actually felt like you could start a relationship with Chris, and not regret it.

The End

-

Send me an imagine, and I will write it. x

-

I do not own this gif.

Credit goes to the owner.

[harryandmeghan0-blog]

James Weir column: Meghan Markle’s destination baby shower sets new trend - NEWS.com.au

New Post has been published on https://harryandmeghan.xyz/james-weir-column-meghan-markles-destination-baby-shower-sets-new-trend-news-com-au/

James Weir column: Meghan Markle’s destination baby shower sets new trend - NEWS.com.au

First came destination weddings and destination birthday parties, now it’s all about destination baby showers — and we have Meghan Markle to thank for the punishing onslaught of invites to the Gold Coast we’re about to receive.

The Duchess threw her baby shower this week in Manhattan and it was all very grand.

She’s such a trend setter and at first it was fun. She’d be spotted with a stylish-yet-affordable Oroton purse and we’d all run out and buy it so we could tell people it’s the same one Meghan has. But it’s just getting ridiculous. Baby showers are tedious to begin with — and now we’re going to have to commute to annoying locations to get to them.

Any destination celebration is just the worst.

“People are still talking about our destination wedding,” one friend, who made everyone lumber over to New Zealand for the nuptials last year, recently claimed.

“Talking about or complaining about?” I replied.

“Everyone loved it, because it was kind of like a mini holiday for them,” he insisted.

Destination parties are a holiday for no one except the person throwing it. For attendees, it’s a waste of money and annual leave.

The worst part about these destination baby showers we’re all going to have to attend is they won’t be anything like Meghan’s. Her bash this week took place in the $100,000 a night penthouse of The Mark Hotel on the Upper East Side.

There were crates of Sancerre and meat provided by a luxury butcher (apparently that’s a thing). There was a fairy floss machine next to a classy harp player, which is a really expensive example of juxtaposition. Amal Clooney chartered a private jet and Serena Williams bankrolled the entire operation.

The showers we’ll be heading to from now on won’t be at some glam hotel in NYC. They’ll be at some random Rydges Resort. And they won’t involve the private jet of human rights lawyer Amal Clooney — just us suffering through a Jetstar flight while questioning our human rights.

20 YEARS IN POLITICS AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TINA ARENA CD

Is Julie Bishop more than just a fabulous pair of shoes and a well-worn Tina Arena CD?

Of course she is. She also has great blazers.

But apparently shoes and Evita are all that came to ScoMo’s mind when pushed to reflect on the groundbreaking career of the former foreign minister.

Julie Bishop’s bombshell decision to quit politics this week surprised. But it was ScoMo’s speech that shocked.

“We share many things in common, not just thinking that Tina Arena is the best Australian female singer!” he chortled.

“Her successor will have big shoes to fill, and we all know Julie has the best shoes in the parliament!”

He said a bunch of other things but these are the two quotes some people are latching onto and context is for losers, anyway.

His statements have raised eyebrows for many reasons. Mainly about Tina Arena being the best Australian female singer. It’s like he’s not even aware all five former members of Bardot are still alive and partially working.

He was trying to be personal while eulogising Julie’s career but it came out like a dad joke. It’s the kind of message you write on the big novelty card that’s passed around the office when Jill the admin girl goes on maternity leave.

ScoMo was one step away from suggesting Julie may like to forge a post-political career as the 2IC of that fancy new shoe level at David Jones Elizabeth Street.

Indeed, Julie’s achievements throughout her 20 year political career can’t be summarised in a hokey send-off. But when I eventually quit my job — and fingers crossed it’s any day now — I hope all that’s mentioned are my fabulous shoes and collection of Tina Arena CDs.

A TRIBUTE TO THE WORLD’S OLDEST MEAN GIRL

Vale Karl Lagerfeld — the legendary creative director of Chanel who died this week aged 85 — and congratulations to his cat Choupette, who’s set to inherit a giant chunk of his $273 million fortune.

Hands up if you’d trade in your current life to be Choupette. She has several maids and gets around in a private jet — probably the same one Amal used for Meghan’s baby shower. Once you know these facts, it doesn’t seem so ridiculous Karl left her the cash — obviously she has a lot of bills to pay.

Karl was internationally known as a fashion god, but in the hours following his death many people began to realise he was also the world’s oldest mean girl. Countless listicles have now been published detailing all the savage things he said about people. Most of his insults were about women in sweatpants and, honestly, it’s all pretty accurate.

In a particularly snarky quote, he voiced his disdain for “rumpledness”. And this probably explains his decision to be cremated. I imagine being buried underground would lead to insane rumpledness.

Karl literally would not be caught dead looking rumpled. Could you imagine if, in the future, his body had to be exhumed for further analysis and they hoisted him out of the dirt looking rumpled? He’d die.

HOT NEW SEX ACT CAPTIVATING AUSTRALIANS

We’ve been shocked by a lot on this year’s Married At First Sight — cheating scandals and virgins ending up in the ER. But one thing has topped it all — a hot new sex trend: Thumbing. It’s all the rage.

Over two episodes, an extremely rational and not at all hilarious debate raged on between Lizzie and Sam about who thumbed who.

“You put ya thumb in my mouth! You put ya thumb in my mouth!” Lizzie yelled at her estranged husband.

“No, you put my thumb in your mouth,” he screamed back.

It was all very sensible. And it hurled into the spotlight the act of thumbing. Long overlooked in the bedroom, it’s about time thumbing got the attention and acceptance it deserves.

Too embarrassed to ask for it? I get it. Try giving your partner a subtle hint by just leaning into it. If they’re a little shy, maybe start with a pinky.

Both feeling adventurous? Switch it up and thumb each other.

Or go bold: thumb yourself.

REAL WINNER OF THIS YEAR’S OSCARS

The Oscars is this Monday and Bradley Cooper is psyched. Not just because he’s up for Best Actor with A Star Is Born. But because the evening will mark perhaps the final time he has to hang out with Lady Gaga.

The past few years of working with Gaga on the flick have been a total punish for Bradley. The lady’s intense. And it has ramped up over the past few months doing promo for the movie. He actually can’t stand hearing her recite the same earnest “one hundred people in a room” monologue one more time. But it’s almost over. And he will be the true winner of the night.

Twitter and Facebook: @hellojamesweir

Source: https://www.news.com.au/entertainment/celebrity-life/james-weir-meghan-markle-kickstarts-annoying-new-trend-of-destination-baby-showers/news-story/a846fba1c67a362e84edd24d21db69cb

[adambstingus]

5 Hollywood Stories You See Everywhere (That Are Always BS)

Entertainment sites are facing a serious problem: There’s a limited number of things that happen every day, but their readers will click on an infinite amount of articles, as long as someone or something vaguely famous is involved. The solution? Follow the grand Internet tradition of making shit up. Print a headline saying “Bill Murray killed and ate Miley Cyrus!” and watch as it gets 100,000 shares before either of their publicists can deny it.

Now, all of us have fallen for stories like these in the past, but there are some particularly egregious types of bullshit articles that should really be setting off our hogwash alarms by now. Starting with ��

#5. Stop Saying The Simpsons Predicted Stuff

The Internet is 80 percent porn, 70 percent fanfic on Tumblr, and 90 percent inaccurate statistics. Whatever’s left is made out of bullshit listicles about how some old Simpsons episode predicted today’s events. Apparently, they foresaw Donald Trump: Angry Half-Chewed Orange Starburst For President 15 years before it happened:

They also predicted that Lisa would be an adult by 2010, so …

But before you go proclaiming Matt Groening “King of the Psychics,” consider this: That episode aired in 2000. Guess what lying, hypocritical moron announced he’d be running for President in 2000? No no, the other one. Yes, Trump said he’d run for President under the Reform Party in 2000 (and had been talking about it since 1987), meaning The Simpsons predicted precisely squat. And as far as them “predicting” that President Trump would destroy the country … duhhhh. That’s like predicting grass will be green, or that a diaper will be loaded with shit.

Can anthropomorphic loaded diapers even legally run for president?

And we do this all. The. Fucking. Time. Unless some fat yellow dude destroys an entire city by pressing the wrong button at the power plant, it’s no big deal if real life imitates The Simpsons. It’s a topical show with damn near 600 episodes under its quarter-century-old belt. Of course there’s going to be overlap with reality — which hasn’t stopped sites like BuzzFeed from marveling over the matter. Let’s review their mind-blowing discoveries:

So the Simpsons made an irradiated food joke, and now Japan’s got irradiated fruit? That’s not a new idea. If anything, the vegetation around Chernobyl predicted The Simpsons. Oh, and the deformed Japanese veggies were bullshit anyway. Off to a good start, BuzzFeed!

OK. So. In 2004, a bunch of Ohio voting machines glitched and accidentally gave George W. Bush 4,000 extra votes. In 2008, the Simpsons satirized that incident. In 2012, it happened again for real. And that’s supposed to be a score for Homer and friends how? Just because your memory was crippled by all those ’90s nostalgia GIF parades doesn’t mean that the past suddenly didn’t happen, BuzzFeed.

This is probably the closest one: They successfully predicted that somebody who works with wild animals would eventually get attacked by one. Impressive. What’s next, claiming that The Simpsons predicted baseball players playing softball?

DICK TRACY, YOU ASSHOLES! THE JETSONS! EVEN THE FUCKING FLINTSTONES! Somebody got paid for this list! You know what, we’re moving on before this gives us an aneurysm.

Arrrrghhh! Too late!

#4. People Need To Chill About Idris Elba Playing James Bond

Eventually, Daniel Craig will stop being James Bond. And despite the fact that he’s a totally outdated character, tradition dictates that we’ll need a new one. One of the top names being bandied about is Idris Elba, who deviates from the Bond norm in one glaringly obvious way …

“The world isn’t ready for a Bond with facial hair. Sorry.”

OK, there’s also the race thing, an issue which Bond novelist Anthony Horowitz dealt with in the worst possible way. In an interview with The Daily Mail, he claimed that Elba would suck as Bond because he’s “too street.” The Internet responded by figuratively painting Horowitz’s naked body gold and leaving him to asphyxiate.

Most were only scandalized to find out there are still Bond books, though (or books in general).

First off, this quote came from The Daily Mail, so rage-sharing it is like raging over something the bad guy said at WrestleMania. Even worse, all these headlines conveniently ignore where he named other black actors he’d prefer play Bond. Everybody’s focused on “too rough” and “too street,” while see-no-eviling the part where he recommended Hustle‘s Adrian Lester instead.

There’s still a race issue at play here, of course — but not in the overt, simplistic way that everybody seeing red took it as. It’s deciding that black actors, who have proven their ability to play both suave and rough with equal tenacity, should only be one thing. Horowitz is typecasting Elba as a rough, street black man, and Lester as a suave, classy black man, and won’t let them sit at each other’s table. And nobody’s talking about this except … The Huffington Post? Really? Dear Internet: When BuzzFeed-Minus-Cat-GIFs is the voice of reason, it might be time to pay attention and rethink things.

Both because they’re right on the money, and because it’ll probably never happen again.

Ex-Bond Roger Moore got in similar hot water recently, accused of opposing Elba Bond over blackness. Moore himself had to clarify that he only said Bond should be 100 percent “English-English” — his interviewer later edited it so it seemed like he was talking about Elba. But you know what? When Elba finally becomes Bond and blows everyone out of their seats, all this ridiculous talk of race, class, and who’s street and who’s not will disappear. Because it’s the performance that matters, not the-

Wait … it was all a rumor? He’s NOT going to be Bond? There were never even talks of him being Bond, nothing but Daniel Craig dream-casting off the top of his head? We got all worked up over that? FUCK.

#3. Every Celebrity Death Hoax Comes From The Same Source: Your Idiot Friends

The world lost the best/worst father in movie history last August when James Earl Jones sadly passed away, according to the Internet. The only person who didn’t hear the news was James Earl Jones, who is still tweeting like normal. Yeah, it was another celebrity death hoax. So what happened? What crapbag news site yellow-journalism’d a beloved celebrity to an early grave this time?

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooot dead yet, guys.”

None, as it turns out. The source is us. We fake-killed James Earl Jones, the same way we’ve fake-killed every other celebrity since the days of Netscape. We’re not merely part of the problem; we’re all of it.

The only source for Darth Vader’s voice reuniting with the Force was the Woodward-and-Bernstein-approved paragon of journalism called FeedNewz. But FeedNewz isn’t a fucking news site — its real name is prank.link, a content creator where any random asshole can plug anybody’s name into the generator and create a fake news story about them. When people clicked on the “James Earl Jones dies” link to learn how an 84-year-old man could possibly pass so suddenly, they got this instead:

“Also, his most famous line was ‘I quit on you when you cleared out of Detroit with Willie the Pimp‘ … from The Lion King.”

GET IT? You thought a thing happened, but it didn’t! Doesn’t that tickle-torture your ribs? Here’s another knee-slapper: Justin Bieber was raped and killed in Las Vegas … except he wasn’t! How gullible you must be, to think people die.

Don’t worry, David Caruso is on the case.

But if FakeNewz sounds too shady for your phony death needs, perhaps you’d prefer a website that sounds an awful lot like a legitimate one? FakeAWish.com will kill any celebrity you like and report it under the name “Global Associated News,” which is the biggest waste of an official-sounding name since Dr. Phil first called himself “Dr.” Then there’s MSMBC.co, where you create a fake death story (like this one for Arnold Schwarzenegger) complete with a link that looks exactly like MSNBC.com if you’re both blindly clicking on everything and actually blind. And when somebody clicks on it, they’re greeted not by a HAHA PWNED page, but a real-ish-looking news story that you can’t read until you share it with your distant uncle and that guy you haven’t talked to since college:

Or with no one, if you go with the Google+ option.

Alternatively, if using those sites is too much work, you can go with the absolute laziest option and create a “RIP [celebrity name]” Facebook page for someone who isn’t in fact RIPing … and then watch it grow inexplicably popular. Rowan “Johnny English” Atkinson, for example, has no fewer than two pre-posthumous Facebook pages, each with over 3,000 fans. For the sake of our species, we hope it’s simply the same 3,000 who fell for the same thing twice.

#2. Stop Pretending Everyone’s Offended By Movies

Hey, remember when those Native American actors walked off the set of Adam Sandler’s new movie? It seems they were outraged over all the gross inaccuracies, blatant stereotyping, lazy jokes, and other things that have never, ever been in an Adam Sandler movie.

“We thought we were signing up for something more sophisticated, like a male deodorant ad.”

Notice how none of those headlines mention how many actors walked off the set, implying through omission that the number was “all of them”? Well, they did that for a reason: The real situation was way less volatile (and thus, more boring) than the hate-click media reported. According to one of the actors, only four out of 154 actors walked out, plus one consultant, leaving the rest to feel “betrayed” that they were being painted as “sell-outs” to the White Man. Oh, and another actor says they all saw the script beforehand, so those who quit probably should have seen the terribleness coming, even if they haven’t been to a cinema since Big Daddy came out.

Precedent shows “pee-pee on your teepee” wasn’t going to be a metaphor.

Then there’s Mad Max: Fury Road and the supposed shitstorm it caused among Men’s Rights Activists for daring to include women kicking ass:

“Feminists started all the wars,” one anonymous member said.

Makes sense, right? Babies throw tantrums. MRAs are babies, so they’re throwing tantrums. Except they weren’t. This entire story came from one blog post on We Hunted The Mammoth, which centered around the anti-Furiosa furor on Return Of Kings, a site so viciously anti-woman even Al Bundy would yell at them to grow the fuck up. But RoK isn’t a MRA site — just some random cootiephobes — and nowhere on Mammoth does it confuse the two. Every other site, desperate for traffic, did that.

Misogynists want her to grow hair and make babies and sandwiches, while MRAs want her to stop destroying masculinity. And to grow hair and make babies and sandwiches.

Did legitimate Men’s Rights Assbags hate Fury Road? Sure, because vagina. But they’re not nearly smart enough to organize some massive boycott of a film $375 million worth of people saw anyway. Also, despite what leading MRA loudmouths fantasize about while jerking off with mini-tweezers, nobody was “paid to put [an MRA boycott story] in the press.” It was lazy and biased, adjectives with which MRAs should be plenty familiar. And finally, we have the time the Noah movie threw every Christian into a hateful tizzy:

That’s a lot of cheek not-turning.

A survey of over 5,000 people found a whopping 98 percent were tut-tutting the movie for bastardizing the Bible. One problem: That survey focused on “faith-driven consumers,” and was organized by an ultra-religious group called … FAITH DRIVEN CONSUMER. They urge boycotts of anything that disagrees with their interpretation of the Bible, and are the same company behind IStandWithPhil, a petition to reinstate that homophobic guy from Duck Dynasty. Even Family Feud surveys like “Name a body part that rhymes with ‘eenis'” aren’t that obviously slanted.

#1. Nope, That Actor Didn’t Confirm A Sequel To That Movie

You know how we’ve dumbed down “literally” and “irony” so morons can feel literate too? “I literally ate an entire pig yesterday, and ironically, I literally ate an entire pig today, too!” We’re doing that crap with “confirm” now. Where once it meant “official news from an official source,” it now means “anybody saying anything about anything.”

Like these constant breaking news stories about a celebrity “confirming” a sequel to some film, when it turns out all they really said was “yeah it’d be cool to do that maybe.” Recently, the Internet went bonkers over Keanu Reeves supposedly saying that Speed 3 was going to happen:

The biggest question now is: Which of the e’s will they replace with a 3?

But no, Speed 3 isn’t happening, for two reasons. Number one: Speed 2. Number two: Keanu was making a goddamn joke. Some reporter asked him about Speed 3, and he said, “Oh my god, Speed 3: Redemption. Sure. Jack Traven kind of like, dusting it off.” That’s sarcasm, folks — another term we’ve dumbed down because nobody can get it right.

Granted, it can be hard to tell with this guy.

Even SlashFilm admits (at the end, when everybody’s stopped reading) that this is probably a non-story, writing “I’m not sure I take the affirmative answer that seriously, but he said it and it’s our job to tell you what he said.” It’s also your job to cleverly edit your headlines so overexcited Speed demons click and share your gossip without a second thought, it would seem.

Ewan McGregor ran into this too, with headlines screaming about how he’d be down with doing Trainspotting 2, even though it’s absolutely not happening.

How old is the ceiling baby now, anyway?

Good God, three paragraphs in, the man admits “I’ve not seen a script yet and I don’t know if there is one.” And yet People reported this anyway. You might as well report on him debating whether to order pizza or Chinese food.

Even Beetlejuice 2 isn’t as done a deal as the headlines make it seem:

Michael Keaton better start practicing his surf moves.

This “confirmation” was her going on Seth Meyers and yammering, “Um, I think I can confirm it, because Tim Burton did this interview — like, it was very hush-hush, top secret … and then he was doing some press for Big Eyes and he did an on-camera interview and he said, ‘Oh yeah, we’re doing it and Winona’s going to be in it,’ and I was like [shocked face].”

And we were like [unimpressed face]. Until some studio gives us an official release date (like Universal recently did with Jurassic World 2), Beetlejuice 2: At Least Lydia’s Legal This Time is nothing but actors talking.

But boy do we love when actors talk — we’ll believe anything they say, even when it’s so obviously a stupid joke. Like Michael Shannon saying he would return as General Zod for Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice, but with flipper hands:

That’s almost as silly as the name of the movie.

Notice how none of those headlines say “flipper hands”? That’s because even the writers know it’s bollocks, but they still want to suck you in and get your clicks, so they tease you “new details” and “strange change.” Except according to Shannon himself, Zod is stone dead, he only appears via voiceover, and the flipper thing was him being a silly goose:

A Batman story starring a guy with flippers? That’s preposterous.

Welcome to the Internet, Shannon, where you can’t believe everything you read, except for that one thing you’re about to share with your buddies. That thing? Totally believable.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/5-hollywood-stories-you-see-everywhere-that-are-always-bs/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/182767620712

[allofbeercom]

5 Hollywood Stories You See Everywhere (That Are Always BS)

Entertainment sites are facing a serious problem: There’s a limited number of things that happen every day, but their readers will click on an infinite amount of articles, as long as someone or something vaguely famous is involved. The solution? Follow the grand Internet tradition of making shit up. Print a headline saying “Bill Murray killed and ate Miley Cyrus!” and watch as it gets 100,000 shares before either of their publicists can deny it.

Now, all of us have fallen for stories like these in the past, but there are some particularly egregious types of bullshit articles that should really be setting off our hogwash alarms by now. Starting with …

#5. Stop Saying The Simpsons Predicted Stuff

The Internet is 80 percent porn, 70 percent fanfic on Tumblr, and 90 percent inaccurate statistics. Whatever’s left is made out of bullshit listicles about how some old Simpsons episode predicted today’s events. Apparently, they foresaw Donald Trump: Angry Half-Chewed Orange Starburst For President 15 years before it happened:

They also predicted that Lisa would be an adult by 2010, so …

But before you go proclaiming Matt Groening “King of the Psychics,” consider this: That episode aired in 2000. Guess what lying, hypocritical moron announced he’d be running for President in 2000? No no, the other one. Yes, Trump said he’d run for President under the Reform Party in 2000 (and had been talking about it since 1987), meaning The Simpsons predicted precisely squat. And as far as them “predicting” that President Trump would destroy the country … duhhhh. That’s like predicting grass will be green, or that a diaper will be loaded with shit.

Can anthropomorphic loaded diapers even legally run for president?

And we do this all. The. Fucking. Time. Unless some fat yellow dude destroys an entire city by pressing the wrong button at the power plant, it’s no big deal if real life imitates The Simpsons. It’s a topical show with damn near 600 episodes under its quarter-century-old belt. Of course there’s going to be overlap with reality — which hasn’t stopped sites like BuzzFeed from marveling over the matter. Let’s review their mind-blowing discoveries:

So the Simpsons made an irradiated food joke, and now Japan’s got irradiated fruit? That’s not a new idea. If anything, the vegetation around Chernobyl predicted The Simpsons. Oh, and the deformed Japanese veggies were bullshit anyway. Off to a good start, BuzzFeed!

OK. So. In 2004, a bunch of Ohio voting machines glitched and accidentally gave George W. Bush 4,000 extra votes. In 2008, the Simpsons satirized that incident. In 2012, it happened again for real. And that’s supposed to be a score for Homer and friends how? Just because your memory was crippled by all those ’90s nostalgia GIF parades doesn’t mean that the past suddenly didn’t happen, BuzzFeed.

This is probably the closest one: They successfully predicted that somebody who works with wild animals would eventually get attacked by one. Impressive. What’s next, claiming that The Simpsons predicted baseball players playing softball?

DICK TRACY, YOU ASSHOLES! THE JETSONS! EVEN THE FUCKING FLINTSTONES! Somebody got paid for this list! You know what, we’re moving on before this gives us an aneurysm.

Arrrrghhh! Too late!

#4. People Need To Chill About Idris Elba Playing James Bond

Eventually, Daniel Craig will stop being James Bond. And despite the fact that he’s a totally outdated character, tradition dictates that we’ll need a new one. One of the top names being bandied about is Idris Elba, who deviates from the Bond norm in one glaringly obvious way …

“The world isn’t ready for a Bond with facial hair. Sorry.”

OK, there’s also the race thing, an issue which Bond novelist Anthony Horowitz dealt with in the worst possible way. In an interview with The Daily Mail, he claimed that Elba would suck as Bond because he’s “too street.” The Internet responded by figuratively painting Horowitz’s naked body gold and leaving him to asphyxiate.

Most were only scandalized to find out there are still Bond books, though (or books in general).

First off, this quote came from The Daily Mail, so rage-sharing it is like raging over something the bad guy said at WrestleMania. Even worse, all these headlines conveniently ignore where he named other black actors he’d prefer play Bond. Everybody’s focused on “too rough” and “too street,” while see-no-eviling the part where he recommended Hustle‘s Adrian Lester instead.

There’s still a race issue at play here, of course — but not in the overt, simplistic way that everybody seeing red took it as. It’s deciding that black actors, who have proven their ability to play both suave and rough with equal tenacity, should only be one thing. Horowitz is typecasting Elba as a rough, street black man, and Lester as a suave, classy black man, and won’t let them sit at each other’s table. And nobody’s talking about this except … The Huffington Post? Really? Dear Internet: When BuzzFeed-Minus-Cat-GIFs is the voice of reason, it might be time to pay attention and rethink things.

Both because they’re right on the money, and because it’ll probably never happen again.

Ex-Bond Roger Moore got in similar hot water recently, accused of opposing Elba Bond over blackness. Moore himself had to clarify that he only said Bond should be 100 percent “English-English” — his interviewer later edited it so it seemed like he was talking about Elba. But you know what? When Elba finally becomes Bond and blows everyone out of their seats, all this ridiculous talk of race, class, and who’s street and who’s not will disappear. Because it’s the performance that matters, not the-

Wait … it was all a rumor? He’s NOT going to be Bond? There were never even talks of him being Bond, nothing but Daniel Craig dream-casting off the top of his head? We got all worked up over that? FUCK.

#3. Every Celebrity Death Hoax Comes From The Same Source: Your Idiot Friends

The world lost the best/worst father in movie history last August when James Earl Jones sadly passed away, according to the Internet. The only person who didn’t hear the news was James Earl Jones, who is still tweeting like normal. Yeah, it was another celebrity death hoax. So what happened? What crapbag news site yellow-journalism’d a beloved celebrity to an early grave this time?

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooot dead yet, guys.”

None, as it turns out. The source is us. We fake-killed James Earl Jones, the same way we’ve fake-killed every other celebrity since the days of Netscape. We’re not merely part of the problem; we’re all of it.

The only source for Darth Vader’s voice reuniting with the Force was the Woodward-and-Bernstein-approved paragon of journalism called FeedNewz. But FeedNewz isn’t a fucking news site — its real name is prank.link, a content creator where any random asshole can plug anybody’s name into the generator and create a fake news story about them. When people clicked on the “James Earl Jones dies” link to learn how an 84-year-old man could possibly pass so suddenly, they got this instead:

“Also, his most famous line was ‘I quit on you when you cleared out of Detroit with Willie the Pimp‘ … from The Lion King.”

GET IT? You thought a thing happened, but it didn’t! Doesn’t that tickle-torture your ribs? Here’s another knee-slapper: Justin Bieber was raped and killed in Las Vegas … except he wasn’t! How gullible you must be, to think people die.

Don’t worry, David Caruso is on the case.

But if FakeNewz sounds too shady for your phony death needs, perhaps you’d prefer a website that sounds an awful lot like a legitimate one? FakeAWish.com will kill any celebrity you like and report it under the name “Global Associated News,” which is the biggest waste of an official-sounding name since Dr. Phil first called himself “Dr.” Then there’s MSMBC.co, where you create a fake death story (like this one for Arnold Schwarzenegger) complete with a link that looks exactly like MSNBC.com if you’re both blindly clicking on everything and actually blind. And when somebody clicks on it, they’re greeted not by a HAHA PWNED page, but a real-ish-looking news story that you can’t read until you share it with your distant uncle and that guy you haven’t talked to since college:

Or with no one, if you go with the Google+ option.

Alternatively, if using those sites is too much work, you can go with the absolute laziest option and create a “RIP [celebrity name]” Facebook page for someone who isn’t in fact RIPing … and then watch it grow inexplicably popular. Rowan “Johnny English” Atkinson, for example, has no fewer than two pre-posthumous Facebook pages, each with over 3,000 fans. For the sake of our species, we hope it’s simply the same 3,000 who fell for the same thing twice.

#2. Stop Pretending Everyone’s Offended By Movies

Hey, remember when those Native American actors walked off the set of Adam Sandler’s new movie? It seems they were outraged over all the gross inaccuracies, blatant stereotyping, lazy jokes, and other things that have never, ever been in an Adam Sandler movie.

“We thought we were signing up for something more sophisticated, like a male deodorant ad.”

Notice how none of those headlines mention how many actors walked off the set, implying through omission that the number was “all of them”? Well, they did that for a reason: The real situation was way less volatile (and thus, more boring) than the hate-click media reported. According to one of the actors, only four out of 154 actors walked out, plus one consultant, leaving the rest to feel “betrayed” that they were being painted as “sell-outs” to the White Man. Oh, and another actor says they all saw the script beforehand, so those who quit probably should have seen the terribleness coming, even if they haven’t been to a cinema since Big Daddy came out.

Precedent shows “pee-pee on your teepee” wasn’t going to be a metaphor.

Then there’s Mad Max: Fury Road and the supposed shitstorm it caused among Men’s Rights Activists for daring to include women kicking ass:

“Feminists started all the wars,” one anonymous member said.

Makes sense, right? Babies throw tantrums. MRAs are babies, so they’re throwing tantrums. Except they weren’t. This entire story came from one blog post on We Hunted The Mammoth, which centered around the anti-Furiosa furor on Return Of Kings, a site so viciously anti-woman even Al Bundy would yell at them to grow the fuck up. But RoK isn’t a MRA site — just some random cootiephobes — and nowhere on Mammoth does it confuse the two. Every other site, desperate for traffic, did that.

Misogynists want her to grow hair and make babies and sandwiches, while MRAs want her to stop destroying masculinity. And to grow hair and make babies and sandwiches.

Did legitimate Men’s Rights Assbags hate Fury Road? Sure, because vagina. But they’re not nearly smart enough to organize some massive boycott of a film $375 million worth of people saw anyway. Also, despite what leading MRA loudmouths fantasize about while jerking off with mini-tweezers, nobody was “paid to put [an MRA boycott story] in the press.” It was lazy and biased, adjectives with which MRAs should be plenty familiar. And finally, we have the time the Noah movie threw every Christian into a hateful tizzy:

That’s a lot of cheek not-turning.

A survey of over 5,000 people found a whopping 98 percent were tut-tutting the movie for bastardizing the Bible. One problem: That survey focused on “faith-driven consumers,” and was organized by an ultra-religious group called … FAITH DRIVEN CONSUMER. They urge boycotts of anything that disagrees with their interpretation of the Bible, and are the same company behind IStandWithPhil, a petition to reinstate that homophobic guy from Duck Dynasty. Even Family Feud surveys like “Name a body part that rhymes with ‘eenis'” aren’t that obviously slanted.

#1. Nope, That Actor Didn’t Confirm A Sequel To That Movie

You know how we’ve dumbed down “literally” and “irony” so morons can feel literate too? “I literally ate an entire pig yesterday, and ironically, I literally ate an entire pig today, too!” We’re doing that crap with “confirm” now. Where once it meant “official news from an official source,” it now means “anybody saying anything about anything.”

Like these constant breaking news stories about a celebrity “confirming” a sequel to some film, when it turns out all they really said was “yeah it’d be cool to do that maybe.” Recently, the Internet went bonkers over Keanu Reeves supposedly saying that Speed 3 was going to happen:

The biggest question now is: Which of the e’s will they replace with a 3?

But no, Speed 3 isn’t happening, for two reasons. Number one: Speed 2. Number two: Keanu was making a goddamn joke. Some reporter asked him about Speed 3, and he said, “Oh my god, Speed 3: Redemption. Sure. Jack Traven kind of like, dusting it off.” That’s sarcasm, folks — another term we’ve dumbed down because nobody can get it right.

Granted, it can be hard to tell with this guy.

Even SlashFilm admits (at the end, when everybody’s stopped reading) that this is probably a non-story, writing “I’m not sure I take the affirmative answer that seriously, but he said it and it’s our job to tell you what he said.” It’s also your job to cleverly edit your headlines so overexcited Speed demons click and share your gossip without a second thought, it would seem.

Ewan McGregor ran into this too, with headlines screaming about how he’d be down with doing Trainspotting 2, even though it’s absolutely not happening.

How old is the ceiling baby now, anyway?

Good God, three paragraphs in, the man admits “I’ve not seen a script yet and I don’t know if there is one.” And yet People reported this anyway. You might as well report on him debating whether to order pizza or Chinese food.

Even Beetlejuice 2 isn’t as done a deal as the headlines make it seem:

Michael Keaton better start practicing his surf moves.

This “confirmation” was her going on Seth Meyers and yammering, “Um, I think I can confirm it, because Tim Burton did this interview — like, it was very hush-hush, top secret … and then he was doing some press for Big Eyes and he did an on-camera interview and he said, ‘Oh yeah, we’re doing it and Winona’s going to be in it,’ and I was like [shocked face].”

And we were like [unimpressed face]. Until some studio gives us an official release date (like Universal recently did with Jurassic World 2), Beetlejuice 2: At Least Lydia’s Legal This Time is nothing but actors talking.

But boy do we love when actors talk — we’ll believe anything they say, even when it’s so obviously a stupid joke. Like Michael Shannon saying he would return as General Zod for Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice, but with flipper hands:

That’s almost as silly as the name of the movie.

Notice how none of those headlines say “flipper hands”? That’s because even the writers know it’s bollocks, but they still want to suck you in and get your clicks, so they tease you “new details” and “strange change.” Except according to Shannon himself, Zod is stone dead, he only appears via voiceover, and the flipper thing was him being a silly goose:

A Batman story starring a guy with flippers? That’s preposterous.

Welcome to the Internet, Shannon, where you can’t believe everything you read, except for that one thing you’re about to share with your buddies. That thing? Totally believable.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/5-hollywood-stories-you-see-everywhere-that-are-always-bs/