#as someone on the aroace spectrum

[iridium-milk]

harvey is really connecting me with a side of femininity i always felt out of touch with because tell me why do i think of this fictional man every time i listen to touch tank by quinnie

[aroacearchangel]

happy pride month. if someone is pressuring you into a romantic or sexual relationship you have the right to kill them with hammers

[pikp0kcas3]

The Hazbin Hotel fandom’s issue with accepting aromanticism and asexuality

Now that it is officially Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week, I want to talk about this!

I find that, as an aroace myself, I am constantly grasping at good representation and coming up empty— it usually ends up in one of two ways.

One: the character is portrayed as emotionless, cold, and robotic in nature. It’s the question aromantic and/or asexual people are often asked: “Are you heartless?” The answer is no, of course, but general media makes it out to be the opposite.

Or two: Their lack of attraction is seen as something to “fix” because they “haven’t found the right one yet”, and they end up with a partner as a “happy ending”.

It frustrates me greatly because of how little people actually see aromanticism or asexuality as a true part of the LGBTQIA+ community.

So when I watched Hazbin Hotel, and I found out about Alastor being aroace, I was over the moon. I was on cloud nine. I also saw how his voice actor has looked up the term as an attempt to learn about aroaces, which makes me OVERJOYED?? Amir is truly a blessing, and I love that he’s proud to embody a character that’s part of our community. It’s so beautiful to finally have a proper character, a fan favorite at that, who just so happens to be aroace— and that’s another thing I love about this.

It’s never explicitly stated in the show (though it is stated in interviews), but it’s rather clear when you’re watching, isn’t it? Alastor’s aversion to any sort of sexual advancement, coupled with Rosie’s blatant “I know you’re an ace in the hole” comment sort of spell out his asexuality pretty clearly, as well as what side of the spectrum he falls upon. In addition, his Valentine’s day card was strictly platonic, which caters to his aromantic side. It feels so validating to finally be represented, to finally have a character in media who shares the same lack of interest in romance and sex as I do.

When I entered the fandom to look for more content, I kind of expected to see the same respect for Alastor’s orientation there too. But that… wasn’t the case? I am fully aware that aromanticism and asexuality are both spectrums— of course, aromantic and/or asexual people can enter those kinds of relationships. I’m not denying that and they belong in the community as much as anyone else on the spectrum.

But, the more I see the same line again and again and again, the more it feels like an excuse to just ship what you want.

Usually I don’t mind shipping? I’m often a firm believer in people shipping what they like as long as it’s harmless and they don’t go crazy over it. I also know for a fact that Viv doesn’t have a problem with people shipping her characters. They are fictional, after all.

But in this case, people are ignoring the very thing that makes Alastor a part of the aroace community! People are ignoring his lack of romantic or sexual attraction!

Is this not the same as changing a gay character’s orientation to suit a straight ship? If not, how so? I’m told that we are a part of this community, so why aren’t we being treated like it? Why is it so hard to accept the people on the end of the spectrum who aren’t interested?

Something I’ve been noticing throughout my life is that society has not exactly progressed very much on the idea of accepting asexual or aromantic identities. Maybe we have, a little, since the old days— but hell, people in “the old days”, which in truth wasn’t very long ago, believed that asexuality was a medical condition to be “fixed” by taking the right medication or having sex. That’s a pretty low bar to clear. And on the romance side, you’re seen as a “late bloomer” or “boring” if you don’t express interest. These days, being friends with someone is treated like a gateway to them possibly becoming a lover. Not getting married, not going on dates, not wanting a partner— it’s all treated like a crime when it’s not.

Maybe I’m selfish, or sensitive, or I’m butthurt over nothing, or I’m making it all about me. Maybe I’m gatekeeping or whatever the term is. But please, please, please, I just want an aroace character like me who simply is not interested in sex or romance.

And I want fandom to respect that. I admire the creations that fans make— the art, the animatics, the writing and the character analysis. And I want people to keep creating because creation is indeed a beautiful thing.

But I really would like people to treat aroace identities like they’re important. Like it’s more than just a spectrum to get wiggle room to wrangle in another ship.

[merely-a-caricature]

Kissing on the lips. No. Why? I don’t get it. Truly? What is so enticing about putting your lips together? Don’t even get me started on tongues…

[boredlime]

happy asexual awareness week! I made a drawing of the flag to celebrate!

it's not much, but I felt like doing something haha! feel free to use it for whatever!

[kittykatninja321]

Post-Flashpoint comics have been trying to push the idea of Jason as a ladies man and each time I have just not been convinced I say this with all the love in my heart I will concede to the fact that Jason Todd has had sex maybe 3 times. If I’m being generous

[shitpostingkats]

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When I tell you I fucking sobbed my eyes out.

[cerulean-crow]

Twicord my beloved <3 Using my redesigns this time!

Fun fact! This was basically my first real ship, basically ever! I was never too into shipping growing up and I was very confused about just how much discourse surrounded it and how absolutely feral some people got over their ships.

But Mlp was what would open me up to stuff like multishipping and crack shipping and how to enjoy a good rare pair- so at one point I just decided I was going to ship something I didn’t see anyone else really shipping. Thus! Twicord!!

At a certain point it stopped being a “joke” and this pairing has since owned my heart for the last decade <3

Sketch and flats under the cut because why not- I tried rendering this a bit differently and I like how it came out

[pixvoxx]

I desperately need someone to explain aromantism to me. The Google definition is not enough. I know what it is, obviously, but for some reason, it is SO difficult for me to understand. Whenever I read about aromantism, I feel like I'm only reading about aroace's, not aro's.

Whenever I think of aromatic, I can't help but think negative about it, because it involves sexual attraction. I'm a fool when it comes to sexual attraction because I don't feel it, so I don't know what it's like. And I also suffer from sexual trauma..but I don't know if that's a valid reason. Throughout my life, I've seen sexual attraction as kind of a messy thing.

By thinking negatively about aromantism, I mean: Do aromatics only care about sex in a relationship(if they happen to be in one)? Or: Do aromantics just want sex, and no fully committed relationships? Those questions has been on my mind ever since I found out about aromantism.

And I know aromantism is a spectrum, the whole Aroace community is. But I'm talking about the iconic, original aromantic flag we all know and love.

I'm asking because I feel terrible for feeling like this about people of my own community, and I feel like I'm dehumanizing aro's because I can't understand how their sexual attraction works.

Don't worry, I will NEVER hate or be aro-phobic to anyone for the way they feel a certain attraction, best believe that.

If ANYONE, could answer my questions, I'll make you a nice dinner.

(please, it's stressing me out— I cry when I'm stressed out—)

[risesthenight]

i personally don’t like shipping characters outside of their canon queer identities but can we talk about the double standard of it

you ship a gay man with a woman and people will riot

you ship an aroace with someone and everyone goes “erm actually it’s a spectrum 🤓☝️ so this is okay”

LIKE 😭😭 just say u don’t give a shit about queer identities that expand outside of romance and sex

[fandom-animals]

chat i think i might be aromantic

[mintaikkcorpse]

Me reading a fic where the person had an identidy realization that they were in he aroace spectrum and now they were figuring themselves out(I finally found something that understood me and a romance I could relate to after all these years)

[k1tty5]

hello :D please tell me more about your mezalian (is that how you spell it??) smalletho I will forever be indebted to you

(they are gorgeous I love them sm)

hey hi !! it would be my pleasure … (and I’ve been spelling it mezalean ??? but i have no idea LOL. there might be a canon spelling but i havent watched joels esmp1 since… probably since it ended. i will have to check sometime)

apologizing in advance because i will probably get very ramble-y!!

ummm. Oh god. How to start. Lets see. WELL. In this silly little au (i guess it has become a bit more than just me doodling designs LOL) in my head they have like this sort of zelink dynamic? obviously without all the zelda lore & stuff, just that kind of … okay forgive me I haven’t brushed up on my zelink lore for a good many years but. Like the princess and her personal knight that doesn’t really talk much sort of thing.

this made more sense in my head. But yeah. They have the vibes of zelink ? At least if i remember zelink right, I have a really bad memory :’) not exactly the same, i do think etho talks to joel (whereas if iirc link never really talks) - especially after getting to know him a bit - but just. they have the Vibes. You know?

I reckon Joel’s definitely very into sculpting in this au, maybe dabbles a little in painting - I imagine mezalea to be very heavy on art and expression in general. think you’d especially see lots of pottery and textiles all around the place. He probably also has an interest in some form of like. um. whats the word. Some sort of … fighting. lmao. Specifically thinking of fencing, i had this idea in my head that he’s watched Etho practice outside the palace at some point and is just absolutely fascinated and enamored. by both the practice and etho himself haha.

and for etho… talented swordsman? he is Not washed. i dont really have many ideas for his character in this au To be completely honest, mostly just of his personality. Although, I alsooo think he’s probably not actually from mezalea? I like to draw him with those pointy elf ears, and i think mezaleans are just humans. I cant remember if thats canon or not but um. mezaleans have human ears, so i’d imagine etho’s probably from like.. rivendelle? Is that. What it’s called. The elf guys? Are they elves??? Goodness I cant remember. Grimlands would make sense too since i THINK they’re kind of like. technical engineer guys? but i dont know what species they are um so ,,, yeah,,,,

i think joel’s probably a bit put off by etho at first, mostly just because he’s not super enthused about the idea of a personal guard, but also because the guys a bit odd, you know? but he’s also probably suuuper intrigued by him. he wants to figure this new guy out, and when they start talking a bit more, i think. They are both incredibly charmed by the other. head over heels? possibly.

most of my ideas of this au are just little scenes that are cute and silly but dont follow any main plot. I would love to write some one-shots of some of the ideas i have in the future, but as of right now im experiencing a bout of creative burnout and am busy with the holidays - spending time with family, so… not right now lol!

hopefully this is what you wanted,,,, i tend to get very ramble-y when talking about literally anything, so i do apologize for that haha, i am Not good at explaining things in simple ways, as i’ve said many a time before.

[aroaessidhe]

adult romance books with demisexual characters be like "I haven't really felt attraction but i know i WANT TO" "yeah I've vaguely heard about asexuality but never looked into it more it's all so confusing and doesn't feel right" *conflates complex feelings about romance and sex into just asexuality* "you don't have to choose labels labels are so confusing and complicated (but you will choose a label related to which genders you're attracted to)" "i know it's okay to be single and not want relationships but I want that and I feel like my life is bad and missing something because of it" *obligatory queer best friend speech telling them it's okay if they don't want sex or romance or both but the MC doesn't internalise that at all* "i don't like labels i guess demi is technically what I might be we'll put the word on the page but I just don't want to label it"

okay!!! we get it!!!

[rockingego]

Rockman and Tomahawkman could be a cute qpr lowkey

The thought came outta nowhere for me but now I can't stop thinking about it

someone please see my vision

[triptychofvoids]

hiiii doctorrrr :3

its me again and i dint really have a question i just wanna say YAY!!!!! cause im also aroace and it makes me super happy seeing an aroace person in a relationship cause some folk seem to think aromanticism/asexuality is a strict monolith (or something like that) when its a huge spectrum

anyways yeah have a great day doc [ALSO I HOPE YOU DONT MIND ME SPAM-LIKING!!! WHOOPS…]

aha yes, unfortunately being aroace is something that tends to be very heavily stereotyped in many cases. not that other identities dont have stereotypes of course, they do, but i do think both asexuality and aromanticism can be very unknown and misunderstood to a lot of people (among other things, even within the aroace community itself in some specific cases) which also often leads to a lot of generalization about what these things are and what they can mean for each person.

regardless, all of that said, yes i am aroace and very happily in a relationship! even though that is not something every aro and/or ace person will want or even entertain the idea of, it is something that is possible!